heliads · 9 months ago
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i've been big and small (and big and small again)
The Ferrari news drops. Sebastian has to know.
masterlist
Sebastian sounds amused over the phone. Even more so than usual, actually. It figures. Anyone would be pleased if the entire motorsport world was tearing itself to pieces to determine fact from gossip and you were the one man with the central cause of the hubbub on the other end of the line. Sebastian Vettel has always been territorial and deeply possessive of the men and teams he covets. This, by all accounts, is a win for him.
It’s a win for both of them. Lewis could have addressed the rumors earlier, certainly, he has known how to handle the PR side of racing for years, but this time around he liked the unsteadiness of it all. Lewis has kept a level head for much longer than he’s really wanted to, and now he gets to revel in the mystery. For once, everyone can chase after him instead of the other way around. No more begging for good cars or for anyone to listen to his suggestions. Hopefully.
Plus, keeping the secrecy alive was all but a guarantee that Sebastian would call. Lewis is not above teasing a married man by leaving him sly details about his future like digital breadcrumbs on a path to more transgressions than either of them would ever admit aloud. Lewis knows perfectly well what he’s doing, and Sebastian does too. If he goes too far– which, above all things, is their favorite habit– well, Maranello is closer to a certain estate in Switzerland than Brackley, at any rate.
“So,” Sebastian says, dawdling on the line, “I seem to recall that I did a surprise switch to Ferrari before you. If this is imitation, I’ll take it as a compliment.”
“A compliment?” Lewis repeats, chuckling. “Of course you would.”
“How else should I take it?” Sebastian protests. “You’re following in my footsteps, it’s lovely. Only, I hope you do a better job of it than I did. My time with the Tifosi was unfortunately lackluster. Fernando’s was as well, so you’ve got two of us to show up.”
“What if mine is too?” Lewis asks. It’s a question that’s been gnawing at him for a while. There is, of course, the freedom in joining with a new team, the resurgence of a hope that’s been steadily decaying for a while, but fear comes with it, the fear that even a new team, new colors, new everything, won’t be enough to reclaim past glory.
Sebastian blows out a low breath, and the static of it crackles over the speaker. Lewis shifts his grip on the phone, cradling it so he can expose more of his skin to the digital current. “Will that matter?”
Lewis scoffs. “Of course it matters.” He’s a man of results. If they try to discredit you, you prove your worth by making it impossible to ignore you. Wins give you protection, world titles give you armor. Lewis cannot afford to be mediocre. His life is one of excellence or nothing.
“I had thought you would say that,” Sebastian tells him wryly, and Lewis can imagine the quietly sarcastic uptick of his smile.
“Am I that predictable?” Lewis asks.
“Well, apparently not, because Sky Sports is running around like a headless chicken,” Sebastian informs him. “But anyone in your position would wonder about what they were doing. Eleven years is a long time to leave behind.”
Lewis shuts his eyes. “I know that part.”
As if he hasn’t thought through it already. Committing to Mercedes was exhausting, but leaving it took far more energy and nerve than even he’d expected. Lewis knows what he wants, an eighth championship with Mercedes and then an opportunity to fuck off forever without being bothered ever again, but sometimes he doesn’t always get what he wants. He’s learned that with Sebastian too, in the form of a ring on his finger that haunts Lewis like a hand around his throat.
“And I know the rest,” Sebastian muses. “We all have to try, and we all have to fail. It’s inevitable.”
“Inevitable,” Lewis says disbelievingly. “I don’t believe you’ve ever thought anything was inevitable. You’ve fought for everything in your life, even when you didn’t have to.”
Lewis can imagine Sebastian’s proud grin even without seeing his face. “I like to make life exciting, yes.”
“Difficult,” Lewis amends. “You like to make life difficult.”
“I make life interesting,” Sebastian suggests. “Can we agree on that?”
“We can,” Lewis decides. “Now, come on, man. This is the part where you try to convince me that the Tifosi will change my life. Radicalize me with Forza Ferrari or whatever it is that you do. Or at least remind me that there will be substantially less porpoising. Distract me from leaving the W14 behind.”
“And Bono?” Seb asks, clearly indulging himself.
Lewis snorts. “Don’t bring up Bono,” he says, but he’s laughing, and blushing more than he’s laughing, and he figures Sebastian can probably tell that even over the phone, so. Not a whole lot of disguising that, then.
Seb chuckles fondly. “You’ll have others.”
“Yeah?” Lewis asks, not quite listening.
“Yeah,” Sebastian affirms. “And old friends, too. There’s a lot to enjoy at Ferrari.”
“Tell me,” Lewis says.
Sebastian’s breath hitches in his throat at the order. And then he talks, and Lewis listens, and the time passes. Rumors spread. Neither of them care.
f1 tag list: @j-brielmalfoy, @juphey
all tags list: @wordsarelife
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love44lew · 3 months ago
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((goofy/silly bonding time))
彡drivers sebastian vettel
彡summary silly/goofy bonding time with playful!seb <3
彡genre sebastian vettelx fem!reader, fluff/teasing
彡note this is a scrap from zodiac turn ons/offs !!
warnings he touches boob
—————-꧁🤍🫧🐬꧂-—————
you were washing the dishes when you heard familiar footsteps approach then a hand smack your ass. you jumped a little and snapped your head around to see a smirking seb leaning on the counter next to you. you side eyed followed by you rolling your eyes and focused back on the task at hand. “im bored, entertain me woman.” you dropped whatever you had in hand and turned your full body to him slowly. “what he fuck did you just say to me?” your mouth slightly agape. “hehe, you heard me” seb loves testing you when hes bored. saying or doing things so you could give him attention like a child. “oh youre done.” you stepped closer to him, forcing his body flush against the counter. “do something then” he glanced at you up and down and bit his lip at an attempt to contain his growing smile. “i will” you narrowed your eyes at him. “too late,” he picked you up and you protested by hitting and scratching his back, which had no effect on him. “sebastian put me down!” you yelped as he threw you down on the couch “oo full name,” he climbed over you and leaned down to your neck, hot breath caressing your sensitive skin. “do it again” he whispers as he begins biting and sucking on the skin, your breath hitching. “s-sebastian, what are you-“ you breath out as he runs his hand up your body and over to your mounds, giving them a squeeze. “hm? say that again?” his blue eyes almost glowed in the dimly lit room as he glanced up at you, kissing his way down your chest. “sebastian..” your breath hitches as he circled his thumb over your clothed nipple. “yeah? you like that?” he whispered in your ear as he made his way up your jawline. you closed your eyes and then pushed him off you, the heat becoming too much. seb fell back onto the couch and wiped his mouth, smirking at you. you stood up and fixed yourself. “youre an asshole” you giggled helping him up from the couch. “im yours.” he smiles down at you and you bursted out laughing. “you might wanna rethink what you said!” you say in between laughs. he rolls his eyes, cheeks reddening in embarrassment. “cus you can eat my shit” you stuck your tongue out at him. “oh youre so dead” seb threatened as you scurried away with him chasing behind you.
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its-avalon-08 · 7 months ago
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hearts intertwined (hamilton x sister! driver!rosberg) p7
chapter 7: we crashed and burned
warnings - none at all
series masterlist
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The Silverstone crowd roared as the grid lights went out. Y/N, her heart pounding a frantic rhythm against her ribs, launched off the line with a blistering start. Having lived in the UK for most of her life, it was her home. This was it. Her home race, her first real shot at a win.
However, qualifying hadn't been kind. A gearbox glitch had left her in P4, frustration gnawing at her. Up ahead, Lewis, the ever-dominant force, sat comfortably in P1. The radio crackled in her ear, Liam's voice calm and collected. "Keep your head down, Y/N. We'll get our chance."
Y/N gritted her teeth, focusing on the race ahead. From the very first corner, she displayed her aggressive driving style, surgically carving her way through the pack. A risky overtake on Bottas here, a daring move on Ricciardo there – Y/N was on a mission.
By lap 15, she had clawed her way up to P2, breathing down Lewis's neck. The tension in the air crackled, the crowd sensing a brewing battle. Y/N pushed her car to the limit, matching Lewis turn for turn.
Lewis, frustrated by her relentless pursuit, made a critical error in judgment. He pitted early, a gamble that backfired spectacularly. Y/N, seizing this golden opportunity, stretched her lead. The Red Bull garage erupted in cheers as she crossed the finish line, checkered flag waving, a first-place victory secured.
The champagne shower was bittersweet. Yes, she had won, but the joy was tinged with a sense of unease. A clip of Lewis's furious radio message, broadcasted after his failed pit strategy, had gone viral. "What a stupid fucking move! She's a cheat, just like her brother!"
Y/N's smile faded. Her phone buzzed incessantly. Twitter was a storm of angry comments, fueled by Lewis's outburst. Tears pricked at her eyes. This wasn't how she'd envisioned her first win. The Lewis she'd known, the playful boy she'd shared video game afternoons with, was a distant memory.
The other drivers, sensing her distress, gathered around her, offering congratulations and words of encouragement. Max, ever the blunt one, scoffed. "Don't listen to that loser, Y/N. You earned that win fair and square."
Lando chimed in, his voice gentle. "Lewis will get over it. He just hates seeing someone else on the podium."
Y/N forced a smile, her voice choked with emotion. "Thanks, guys." But the victory felt hollow. The playful rivalry she'd secretly harbored a spark for had morphed into something toxic and consuming. As she walked away, a single tear rolled down her cheek, a silent testament to a shattered dream.
Fury simmered in Nico's eyes as he stormed into Y/N's garage. The radio message, the hateful words Lewis had spewed – they were a declaration of war, not just on Y/N, but on their entire family. He found Y/N huddled with Max and Lando, a brave smile plastered on her face.
"Y/N," Nico's voice was a low growl. "That message…"
Y/N waved him off, her smile faltering. "Don't worry about it, Nico. Lewis is just… Lewis."
Max scoffed. "Just Lewis? That was disgusting! You drove brilliantly, Y/N. You deserved that win."
Y/N offered a weak smile. "Thanks, Max. I appreciate it."
Across the paddock, Lewis watched the interaction unfold. A pang of guilt twisted in his gut as he saw Nico comfort Y/N, wiping away a stray tear that escaped her determined facade. The playful banter, the shared laughter of their childhood – it seemed a lifetime ago. He had let the rivalry consume him, turning a sweet memory into a bitter enemy.
Later that evening, Y/N exited the restroom, her face drawn. Lewis, who had been washing his hands, froze. He knew he owed her an apology, a genuine one. He opened his mouth to speak, but Y/N brushed past him, ignoring his presence altogether.
"Y/N, wait," he pleaded. "I need to apologize for what I said. It was…"
Y/N stopped, her back stiff. Tears welled up in her eyes, threatening to spill over. The dam broke when Lewis spoke again.
"It was unprofessional and disrespectful," he continued, his voice low. "You are a phenomenal driver, Y/N, and you deserve every bit of your success."
She spun around, her voice trembling with unshed tears. "Don't you dare," she choked out. "Don't you dare act like you fucking care now. You and Nico… you fell out, you started hating each other so deeply that... you stopped being in each others lives. And I had to watch him lose a best friend, and in the process, I lost you. I cried for days when you stopped talking to him, Lewis. And you know what? You didn't even call or text me one time. Not when everyone on Twitter called me a nepo baby, not when I got into that crash in F2. Not when the entire racing community said that I didn't deserve a place because i was a woman. You were part my whole world. My. Whole. Fucking. Universe. And it was so easy for you to leave and cut me out. So no Lewis. I'm not giving in this time because as much as you claim to be Mister. Nice Guy I know your reality and it is the fact that you didn't care one bit."
Lewis felt the floor drop out from under him. He had no right to be surprised. He had pushed Y/N away, collateral damage in his war with Nico. The pain etched on her face mirrored the forgotten ache in his own heart.
"Y/N…" he stammered, his voice heavy with regret. But the words died in his throat. He had hurt her, pushed her away, and apologizing now felt hollow in the face of his past actions.
Y/N wiped away a tear, her voice laced with a steely resolve. "Save it, Lewis. The damage is done." With that, she turned and walked away, leaving Lewis alone with the weight of his remorse.
credits for gif - @lewishamiltongifs
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taglist: @laura-naruto-fan1998 , @xoscar03 , @torossosebs , @jajouska , @lindsayjoy444 , @barcelonaloverf1life
🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️
leave a like! leave a comment! reblogs are appreciated!
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kimio7 · 1 year ago
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Hey! Do you have any recommendations for multiple chapters Sewis fics that you liked? 🤗 Thanks!!
OFCC starting w an obligatory The Numbering at Bethlehem and transmotion recommendation, theyre both amazing and changed my life
rabbits are chasing by cloudsandpassingevents
Sewis at Le Mans!! ft nico to thicken the tension!! read it pretty recently but i love it sm <3
technically a oneshot but its also 30k+ so i hope it still works lol!
the heartbeat is a hunger by withfeathers
the soul bonding premise was done super well in this and the relationship evolves so naturally 39k, 4/4
Entanglement by Azzy
as per the tags, if you like romcom, youd probably like this! a very fun read tho it is incomplete for now 42k, 5/6
Lucky Thirteen by Azzy
one of my favourite kid fics literally ever like! wow its so cute and sweet it so enjoyable genuinely 80k, 10/10
Hard Year / Good Time / Socks Up / Foot Down by bestliars
one again technically a oneshot but one again its 50k!! amazing read the amnesia plotline is genuinely so well done and is something that is present throughout
I hope you like these anon!! (and i hope u havent already read these lol) I still to read more sewis and f1 fics in general but the ones ive recc'd are my favourite of what i currently have bookmarked
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princelancey · 4 months ago
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tagged by the bestie @f1-disaster-bi to expose my wips
Rules:
Make a new post with the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! And then tag as many people as you have WIPs. <- i will not be following this last one and you'll see why 💀
Single dad lance au 
Nando and Mark adopt Lance AU
Strollonso mermaid au
Nando/Lance cowboy au
Strollonso cozy christmas fluff - fake dating AND only one bed - will you be my christmas date? Pleeeeease
Supernatural coffee shop au - fernando as human worker, grid as fantasy creature
Lance/checo/nando throuple
Angst prompt oneshots
Lewis & his williams driver thing 
Val and lewis ‘adopt’ zhou 
Lesteban mechanic au
Lierre seat swap au
Lance/stoffel soulmate au
2015 prema group chat 
Strollonso selkie au 
5+1 about Lance's ass
5+1 lance and his spanish kink
Webbonso royalty au
mark/jenson magic au
Charles/pierre bakery au
Sebson non famous au
Sewis historical au (baroque)
lance/pierre kid au
este/lance enchanted forest au
este/mick werewolf au
val/lance mermaid au
kevin/hulk coffee shop au
checo/lance soulmate au
sequels?
alrighty so I need to get back to work (wfh today whoop whoop) but please feel free to send some asks and I'll be back in 2 hours ^◡^
any who no pressure tagging (not 29 people i'm sorry rules) @no00000000 @lil-shiro @lovelytsunoda @rivalism @wewentcarracing @/strollonso discord server (if you see this 👁👁 please I'm so bad at matching people's urls to names i'm so sorry i need a chart and now I really need to get back to work)
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ghostwnby · 9 months ago
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Ghostwnby's intro post!
Hello everyone! I thought it was about time I wrote a little intro post for this blog. So with that being said, hello! Welcome to my blog!
Some quick facts about me:
- 19
- I'm American
- I use any/all pronouns
- I identify as queer <3
- I am currently hyperfixated on f1 (my fav teams are Redbull [excluding Christian Horner], Mercedes, Aston Martin) but I do love hockey (my fav teams are Boston Bruins, New York Rangers, Pittsburgh Penguins, and Chicago Blackhawks) as well :)
Talking about f1, my top 5 favorite drivers are:
1. Esteban Ocon
2. Daniel Riccardo
3. Sebastian Vettel (+ Lewis Hamilton they are a bonded pair they come as a duo i dont make the rules 💀)
4. Max Verstappen
5. Fernando Alonso
♡♡♡
I really like the rest of the current grid (especially Lance <33) but if I had to share my "bottom" three it would be:
1. George Russell - I'm sorry but something about this man's vibes are extremely off to me and he lowkey scares me 😭😭
2. Pierre Gasly - Same reason as George. He's not as bad but still his vibe is just not it for me 💀
3. Sergio "Checo" Pérez - I'm sorry to all the Checo fans out there but I absolutely hate this man so much. Even before I started watch DTS I hated him. He gives me creepy gross man vibes. I hate it.
♡♡♡
Even though I haven't posted anything in YEARS, I have been getting back into writing fics again.
So with that being said, here is a list I am (or will) write for:
- Sewis
- Maxiel
- Strollonso
- Landoscar
- Charlos
- Yukierre
- George Russell + Alex Albon (idk their ship name??)
- Esteban + Lance (again idk their ship name)
And ones I won't write for:
- lestappen (don't kill me)
- Max/Checo (or any dealing with Checo tbh)
- Carlando (don't kill me 2.0 yall are scary)
- Lando/Daniel
- Charles/Pierre
♡♡♡
Also, my request box is open! I would love to answer any questions/requests you all might have for me 🤭
But before that I want to set a few ground rules.
Here is what I am WILLING to write:
- imagines/oneshots (involving the drivers/ships I listed before)
- fluff
- angst**
- smut**
- Maybe x reader??
**There are limitations to what I am willing to write. (No heavy angst aka any triggering/heavy topics And I will list the restrictions on smut below)
With that being said here is what I'm NOT willing write:
- Anything dealing with the drivers/ships listed earlier
- Again any heavy/triggering topics
- Any type of age play
- Anything that deals with extreme k!nks
- Piss (or anything along that matter)
- Anything problematic (I've seen some insane tags for fics smh)
♡♡♡
I think that's all for now! If I think of anything else or I have any big updates I will definitely update this! Thank you all for reading! I hope you have a wonderful day/night 🥰💕
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talictries · 1 year ago
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welcome to my tumblr page!
yoooooo,,,,
i am mainly an ao3 writer (currently f1 writer but have previously written a lot of skz) and this is just a little page for me to post my art and my drabbles / fic ideas!
ao3: talictriestowrite twt (skz, semi ia) : @talictries
my fics (so far): fathers and sons - long sewis kidfic ongoing thirty-three - angsty daniel mclaren oneshot perpetuity - angsty piarles moden-AU oneshot salvatore - pwp max/oscar post-japan gp oneshot one more - pwp lando/oscar - post qatar sprint oneshot the honey of humanity - highschool galex au ongoing nitwbtm (solar eclipse) - angsty loscar 23' oneshot anywhere i want (just not home) - angsty strollonso 23' oneshot deliverance - 24' markoscar fic al dente - 24' hungarian gp loscar magical realism power oneshot
my f1 art : here my drabbles/ fic ideas : here
my fathers and sons memes : here
my live race reactions : here
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loveyouhomex · 2 years ago
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so I have this huge project idea for a story/fanfic which will take me ages and I should and really want to work on that. but I also have like three other ideas for shorter stories and now I wanna work on them. and at the same time I know my adhd brain will make me loose interest halfway in all of them so damn what am I gonna do. 😭😂
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chubbydino · 2 years ago
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whip and tongue
a sewis oneshot.
Sebastian much preferred his home in Switzerland, its cottage-like charm and kind neighbors. His German home was more of an art piece. Glass, dark wood, black accents. Warm lighting that glowed orange more than white.
Visiting always felt like living in a movie. Which made sense, since every time he came here, he left reality at the doorstep.
buy me a coffee?
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heliads · 2 years ago
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Where I Can't Follow
Lewis Hamilton isn't sure that he wants to retire yet, but when the rest of the world seems so sure of the opposite, it's hard not to feel his confidence shrink. In times of stress, then, is it really such a surprise that he would go to Seb for help?
masterlist
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Lewis Hamilton has been thinking. About a lot, actually, but mostly about expectations. Everyone in this strange alternate shade of reality known affectionately as Formula One have started to shift their expectations for him. It started when he didn’t win a single race in all of 2022. It started when his car suddenly wasn’t crushing everyone else by leagues.
There has been an undercurrent of whispers in the paddock about whether or not Lewis will continue his contract with Mercedes at the end of the 2023 season. It was never in doubt before, or not as much in doubt as this. If there were whispers before, Lewis always made sure no one’s doubt was strong enough to influence him.
This is different, though. Lewis can feel his age in a way he never has before. He thought that time could only ever bring him maturity, knowledge, maybe even that humility people used to encourage him to develop– but he props it up with every step now. Aching bones, twisted back. He is not as young as he once was, and that is both for the best and for the worst.
Fernando was about 37 when he retired for the first time. He returned, of course, but he took a break anyway. Michael Schumacher was 37 too, also had a comeback. Sebastian– Sebastian is 35 and gone somewhere Lewis can’t seem to find him. Lewis would like to see him here again, but useless hopes don’t bring back friends or rivals or the strange sort of both that happened to him and Seb.
So where does that leave Lewis, then? On the outskirts of infirmity? This whole thing is sort of ridiculous– Lewis is 38 now, far from decrepit and elderly, yet everyone’s treating him like he’ll break a bone if he’s pushed down the stairs. Maybe that was why Fernando came back, both boredom and also the hesitance to make it seem like his best years were already behind him.
Lewis supposes he could go and talk to Fernando about the retirement dilemma, but that feels like giving up, in some weird way, so he keeps his mouth shut. There is, of course, the one person that Lewis would really like to speak with, but Sebastian is quite far away from him at the moment.
Sebastian. Of course Lewis is lying awake at night and thinking of Sebastian of all the rivals he’s had over the years. Lewis has had the pleasure and curse of meeting many a young upstart with something to prove, but for some reason Seb is the only one who’s ever stuck around in Lewis’ head long enough to make an impression.
The preference goes both ways, actually. Lewis is the only driver on the grid with Sebastian’s personal phone number, he’s the only one who can show up unannounced and expect Seb to both be there and happy to see him.
The thought of visiting Sebastian out of the blue does something strange to Lewis when it’s actually a possibility. It makes him think of one time last year when Lewis had actually taken Seb up on his offer of an open welcome instead of brushing him off.
It wasn’t as idyllic a trip as Lewis’ nostalgia for the past will let him believe. Lewis had offhandedly mentioned that he was travelling away from his place in Monaco for a bit and Sebastian had offered for him to drop by if he was in the neighbourhood. Lewis wasn’t remotely close, but something in Sebastian’s tone made him switch around a flight or two and then there they were, out on Seb’s back porch like they’d known each other from their cradles to the present day.
Sometimes, Lewis wants them to have been friends for longer, even beyond the tumultuous string tying them together before they got over themselves and started liking each other properly. Lewis lingers over photos of a teenaged Seb taped up on the refrigerator and wonders how he forgot how sharp that grin used to be, too many teeth showing for one smile and all that. The expression has softened on Sebastian now, it fits better in between the skin of his cheeks, but Lewis misses the infuriating adolescent Seb had been anyway.
They’ve known each other for decades now, but Lewis wants more. He cannot help it, the wanting is in his blood:  the need to win a race, the urge to keep his career moving forward, and now, the most recent want of all, this all-consuming desire to keep Seb with him for as long as Lewis can physically manage it. 
Comparing the Polaroid with the genuine article just down the hall, Lewis feels an unruly monologue crash through his head, heavy with wanting and twice as burdensome on his heart. There's a kid that you're supposed to know, I think. He was supposed to have been me. We were meant to grow up together, but if you ended up being born several countries out of reach, that can't be held against you. All the same, I’m certain that it was supposed to work out better than it did.
Then again, maybe it was for the best that Lewis had not known Sebastian as a child. Look what he did to Nico, after all; look how he fucks up the best parts of his life. Still, Lewis gets the feeling that it might have been different had Seb been the snarky boy by his side instead of the junior Rosberg. Did they not survive their rivalry? Did they not survive it all?
Sebastian comes to get him soon enough, chastising Lewis for getting caught up in someone else’s photos (if you want to stalk me, Lewis, there are enough pictures out there on the Internet already, at least have some style) and gesturing for Lewis to join him out back. Lewis watches the sun progress through the sky, and just when his guard is finally lowered, Sebastian slips a knife in between his ribs.
When Lewis first hears Sebastian form the words, he thinks it must be the start of some awful joke. I think I’m going to retire at the end of this season. He almost starts to laugh. See, this is the sort of thing Seb would have done, eyes sparking with malicious humor from underneath a Ferrari cap, maybe even a Red Bull. Lewis would have rolled his eyes and told Sebastian to stop trying to scare him like that. Maybe he would have even threatened to tell the tabloids so Sebastian would have to keep talking about it in press conferences until the beaten horse had long since died.
But they are not young men anymore, and Sebastian is no longer grinning down at him from the top step of a podium, and so Lewis knows with a glum certainty that he is not joking. The truth of it sits lodged at the base of his stomach, heavy and cold and terrible.
Seb looks over at him. “Say something.”
Lewis can’t. Sebastian sighs, and for a brief, fleeting moment, Lewis can imagine exactly how the other man must see him:  stubborn, morose, an old sap unable to accept the terms of his own world grinding on without him. For once, Sebastian would be in agreement with the media, and that breaks Lewis’ heart more than he expected.
And then Seb’s face splits in a self-satisfied smirk, so goddamn Seb-like that Lewis’ throat closes up, and he tells Lewis that he’s glad of it. “That just means that you’re not sick of me yet,” Sebastian says, a touch of self-deprecating humor lancing through the words just sharp enough to startle, “and that’s good news to me, I suppose.”
Lewis had tried to argue this, meant to ask Sebastian to name one instance Lewis had been sick of him (except perhaps Baku, although they are both satisfied with that result by now) but Sebastian had interrupted him, encouraged Lewis to finish his drink before the ice melted, and so he did. After that it was easier. The necessary words did not have to be spoken to be understood.
Lewis had wondered for weeks afterwards if he should have said something after all. If Lewis had known the right thing to tell Sebastian, would it have stopped him from retiring? The rest of the visit had been more than good, but at the end, it had been an excuse for Sebastian to tell him that truth, and they both knew it. Sebastian had still left. Sure, it would have been worse to find out from that depressing Instagram post like everyone else, but Lewis feels no better off with his knowledge. It just meant he had to sit with that sadness for longer. 
Lewis had not understood why Sebastian would want to leave their ring of exactly 20 glorified car jocks for a quiet afterlife, not even after last year, but he thinks he’s starting to get it now. The urge to tear down his legacy like ripping up construction paper keeps flickering through Lewis’ head. They want him gone, don’t they? They have since the start. He might as well give them a show while he’s at it, it’s what they’ve always wanted.
Maybe that’s why he finds himself reaching out to Sebastian again. Seb gave him a warning when he left, Lewis found it right to do the same. Some part of him mainly just wants someone to shake him around the shoulders and tell him to get his head in order. Seb could do that too. Sebastian can do a great many things. The hold he has on Lewis is astonishing. That would explain why Lewis spent so much time last season talking about how Sebastian would most certainly come back. He could not find it within himself to accept the loss otherwise.
I am going to destroy myself, Lewis decides in the middle of the night to an imaginary Sebastian, I am going to destroy myself and all I have created, and I want you there to see my castle burn. You do not have to put the fire out. I just want you to know that it was me who did it and not anyone else. 
The warning would be right, after all. If Sebastian suspected foul play, he would never let it go, and if this retirement is truly what he wants, who is Lewis to take that from him just because he needs an ally? Of course Seb would release a statement or ten if it seemed like Lewis was under fire. He is good like that, good in a way that makes Lewis want to never let him go.
Lewis types out one text message, makes it as inconspicuous as he possibly can. Sebastian responds within the hour, a screenshot of an upcoming flight to Lewis’ location. Lewis wonders if Seb can see through him as plainly as he did with Seb last season.
And then Lewis is opening up the door to his place and Sebastian is grinning at him, making fun of his wallpaper or something gloriously simple like that, and it is like no time has passed at all. Something relaxes in Lewis’ chest, a muscle he hadn’t realized he was contracting. It’s okay. Sebastian still wants him. This. All of it. Even without the forced proximity of the track.
He pours drinks, and they idly talk about small news and whatnot before Lewis poses the question that’s been burning on his tongue, well, for months.
“How did you know, man?” Lewis asks, “How did you know it was time to leave?”
Sebastian tilts his head back, blows out a low breath. “That’s a tricky question. Why?”
Lewis studies the glass in his hand very carefully. “Just. You know. You wonder sometimes.”
Lewis can practically sense Sebastian sitting straighter, the suspicion growing. “You only wonder if you’re thinking about going. I thought you weren’t interested in that.”
Sebastian is wonderful at fighting the world. He'd spit in anyone's eye so long as it was right, and doubly so if it was wrong, too. Lewis doesn't want someone to defend his honor, though. He just wants someone to listen.
That might have been harder at the start, back when they were just a few years past the end of boyhood, but they are older now, more prone to contemplation. Sebastian kicks up his feet on a nearby ottoman (he had the grace to take his shoes off at the door, Seb has learned by now how Lewis gets about stuff like that) and he listens to Lewis’ injustices turn from a well-organized and repeated mantra to rambling complaints.
At last, when Lewis pulls quiet back over himself like a favorite piece of clothing, Sebastian purses his lips thoughtfully and carries on. “Are you going to leave, then?”
Lewis blinks in surprise. He hadn’t thought that Seb would even name that as an option, Lewis had always been so adamant about staying until his eighth world championship win at least. He supposes he had been hinting at it all this time, and of course it is what everyone else is wondering, so it shouldn’t be much of a surprise that Sebastian wants to know, too.
“I don’t know, really,” he says at last, “I think I want to keep going, but that depends on who’ll have me. Contracts, you know.”
Sebastian, of all people, knows how contracts can go. Lewis still tastes a smattering of anger on his tongue whenever he passes Mattia Binotto in the paddock. Seb taps his finger against his glass like he’s summoning a dinner party to a toast, then sets the vessel down on one of Lewis’ nearby coasters. Recycled wood. He tries when he can.
“Don’t retire,” Sebastian says, “Not quite yet. It won’t be the right time.”
Lewis wants to ask if it was the right time for Sebastian, but he doesn’t know that either of them would be able to come up with an adequate answer.
Instead, he sighs, turns his head towards Seb again. “Do you miss it?”
It’s a ridiculous question, and were it asked by anyone except Lewis at this moment in this place, Sebastian would probably despise him for it. Seb knows Lewis enough to recognize the lack of condescending tone laced within the question, though, so he smiles and gives him a good answer this time.
“Parts. Some of it I’m glad to leave. Others were harder.” Sebastian pauses, then admits it, what they’ve both been wanting to hear. “I missed you most of all.”
An impatient part of Lewis makes itself heard before he can stop himself. “I’m here now, though.”
“I know,” Sebastian says softly, “I know.”
Lewis knows it too. That will make it okay when he has to leave, when they will both be pulled to their respective corners of the earth once more. At some point, he will be able to come back, and they will be the same as always. Nothing has changed. That heals Lewis more than he thought possible.
f1 tag list: @j-brielmalfoy
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heliads · 1 year ago
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Formula One Ship Fics Masterlist
Britcedes
going down with the ship - There are two people left on a sinking ship. One is Lewis. The other is George. Oneshot
kill your darlings - Lewis is a world-class writer. George is the son of Lewis’ publisher. Neither of them will get what they want from this, but that won’t stop it from happening. Oneshot
Brocedes
i’ve got my eye on you - Nico Rosberg has moved on from 2016, the silver war, all of it. So he thought, at least. Lewis is still here, though, and that makes the forgetting so much more difficult. Oneshot
Charlos
mortifying ordeal of being known - Based on this request: "f1 soulmate au with charles x carlos? whatever a person writes on themselves shows up on their soulmate. they realize they're soulmates when one of them gets a podium and the other person sees their drawings" Soulmates AU
Galex
you always knew how to push my buttons - Alex Albon, long-suffering woman in motorsport, would really like to focus on her first year of racing for Williams. George Russell makes that difficult. Girl!Alex Oneshot
Sewis
i've been big and small (and big and small again) - The Ferrari news drops. Sebastian has to know. Drabble
Where I Can’t Follow��- Lewis Hamilton isn’t sure that he wants to retire yet, but when the rest of the world seems so sure of the opposite, it’s hard not to feel his confidence shrink. In times of stress, then, is it really such a surprise that he would go to Seb for help Oneshot
Strollonso Masterlist
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loveyouhomex · 4 years ago
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Confetti
The Season Testing in Bahrain 2021 doesn’t go to plan for either Mercedes or Aston Martin. Lewis starts overthinking everything and feels as if he’s the one to blame, if Seb’s season will be as bad with Aston as it was with Ferrari.
Read my sewis oneshot here.
Massive thank you to @oopshiaddict for being her amazing self, helping me out and writing cute comments. ❤️
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