#she is out drinking & that hurts max more than words can even describe.

[zoomingupthathilla]

Can we talk about how Max loves her mother unconditionally? I know I've mentioned this before BUT --- when asked about her by Ms.Kelley she defended Susan.. Still made her out to be a great mom who wasn't around because she was providing. When, yes that might have been part of it, but she also wasn't around because she couldn't fathom being home, around max. without neil. in a trailer.. Susan might have had to pay the bills, but she also just wasn't there. A choice she made consciously. That being said, Max holds so much resentment towards her. Her mother let her father leave, she let an abuser come into their home. She let this abuser actively abuse the only other family she had. A brother that might have loved her, or showed that he loved her -- if he was allowed to. She became distant, never there. Leaving max to fend for herself. Max lost everything, Billy, El, Will & her mother, and Susan didn't even care. So yes she loves her mother unconditionally, but she also resents the shit out of her. Hatred slowly builds every time she thinks about her mom.. Every time Susan is brought up, she can feel the ice around her heart grow colder, thicker.

[angelsswirl]

Icarus

Summary: You were never supposed to fall in love with your best friend.

Or

If you should fall

From your pink sky

Just know you'll fall into my arms, every single night

Icarus babe

Requested: Yes

Word Count: idk, a decent amount?

Title Song: Icarus by Max Lawrence

Rating: Mature, but the smut wont be graphic because I don't think that fits what I've written here. It's more implied than anything

Notes: I hope you enjoy it!

...................

You were never supposed to fall in love with your best friend. You weren't. You knew this as fact.

And that isn't to say, it never happened for other people. That it never worked out. No. You just knew that it wouldn't work out for you. Things like that rarely did.

You had prayed, and wished, and hoped that this would all work out. But all of your pleas had fallen on deaf ears. And you couldn't say you were surprised.

Park Chaeyoung was your best friend.

She knew that. You didn't have to tell her.

She was the person you told everything to. The person you did everything with. The person you lived for.

Park Chaeyoung was the love of your life.

She did not know that. You weren't going to tell her.

She was the person you dreamed about at night. She was the person you fantasized about in the day. She was the person you breathed for.

But.

She would never know. Because you would never tell her. Living in your truth by yourself seemed a much better option then speaking your truth and being denied of it.

You're not afraid to admit you're not very strong when it comes to love. But you are afraid to admit that for her, you would try to be.

~•~

"Watching you two together makes me sad." Jennie said out of nowhere.

You frowned at her. Rosé had run off to God knows where minutes prior, leaving just you and Jennie standing in the corner of someone else's livingroom during a house party.

It gross and sticky and hot and most definitely not your scene, but Rosé had practically begged you to come along, and return you had practically begged Jennie to be your buffer. And maybe even your sober coach as well.

You didn't trust yourself, alone with Rosé and alcohol in your system.

"What are you talking about?" You and Jennie are standing close enough to each other that you don't have to shout of the pumping bass of som Top 40 song, but you definitely can't whisper either.

Jennie rolled her eyes. She was bored. She really only tagged along to be a good friend. This wasn't her scene either. That was one of the reasons you two got along so well. You both hated and loved the same things.

Sometimes, you think if maybe Jennie wasn't straighter than a steel beam, then maybe she'd be the best friend that you'd have fallen in love with.

But that wasn't what the cards said for you.

"You and Chae. It's like watching those 'arms of the angels' or whatever commercials. You know with the hurt, homeless puppies?"

It was your turn to roll your eyes, "Well, I'm sorry I can't serve to be your entertainment 24/7."

"Oh, I didn't say this wasn't entertaining. It's just also sad. Like, what's the hold up, just grab her face and kiss her."

"I'm sure to her it would be like if I just grabbed your face and kissed you."

"No, that would imply she's straight and not head over ass in love with you. Both of which, I know not to he true for her in the slightest."

"She's not in love with me, Jennie."

"And I'm not sweating through my clothes right now." She replied sarcastically.

You only shook your head and took another sip of your lukewarm beer.

"Riddle me this, Y/N. If Chaeyoung isn't in love with you then why does she look at you like she would stop breathing if you were ever out of her sight? If Chaeyoung isn't in love with you then why does she treat you like you'll melt away? If Chaeyoung isn't love with you then why are you the only thing she talks about when you're not around?"

You shook your head profusely, "Chaeyoung is like that with everyone. She's sweet and nice and flirty with everyone. And that's exactly why it's time for me to finally get over her."

Jennie nodded along silently. You got the feeling she was only pretending to agree with you.

"Ok, well then, you know what the first step to getting over someone is. Get under someone else. How about the girl over there? She's been staring at you since we got here." Jennie pointed to a tall, admittedly beautiful woman across the room from you. She wasn't looking at you at the moment, but you had noticed her staring earlier as well.

Despite all of what you just said, you'd sooner rather die than get over Rosé but you were stubborn and needed to prove a point to Jennie.

"Hold my beer." Jennie did so with a curious smirk on her face.

You walked your way over to the woman, dodging elbows and sloshing drinks. She saw you coming, a soft smile engulfing her lips.

"Hi." She said some what softly.

"Hey."

"Not to be creepy or anything, but I noticed you when you walked in, and I sort of couldn't help myself but to stare at you all night. You're beautiful, "She paused, "My name is Lisa, by the way."

"I-it's not creepy. I'm Y/N....want to dance?"

"I loved to."

You grabbed Lisa's hand and all but dragged her onto the dancefloor. This must have been where the drunkenness set in. You turn around on your own accord, pressing your back into Lisa's front. Swaying your hips to the pounding in your ears, because you definitely cannot hear the music anymore.

~•~

"Where's, Y/N?" Rosé asked Jennie as she met her. She handed her the water she had picked up for the three of them.

Jennie pointed in your direction with a hum.

Rosè watched silently as you grinded on the stranger.

"I was gone for 5 minutes..."

"You snooze, you lose, I guess." Jennie felt bad for acting so cavalier, but at this point, the only way to get you what you wanted was to be completely honest.

Rosé didn't exactly know what to think of that. Or rather it was hard for her to think anything when you were dancing seductively with someone pointedly not her.

The emotions that come with it are hard to pick through as well. Hurt, anger, jealousy, and maybe she's even a bit turned on because she finds you immensely sexy.

Whatever the case may be, she decided that she can't sit around and just watch. No that would hurt too much. She's gotta stop this. She's gotta fix this.

~•~

Chaeyoung was never supposed to fall in love with her best friend. At least she doesn't think she was supposed to. There's no real way to be sure.

And that isn't to say that she's not sure if she loves you. She's 100% sure about that. It's to say that, how is she supposed to know if you love her back.

She had prayed and wished and hoped that you would see the signs that absolutely poured out of her whenever you were near. But, all of her pleas had fallen on deaf ears. And she couldn't say she was surprised.

You were her best friend.

You knew that. She didn't have to tell you.

You were the person she confided in. The person who knew her deepest, darkest secrets. The person she breathed every breath for.

You were the love of her life.

You didn't know that. She had been trying to tell you.

You were the person she gave herself pep talks in the mirror for. The person she put on her most expensive outfits for. The person she would live a thousand lives for.

But.

You were oblivious. Sometimes, it seemed like you didn't even want to know. Chaeyoung didn't want to live in her truth by herself. She wanted to shout it from the rooftops. But keeping that to herself seemed a much better option than making you uncomfortable and losing you as a friend.

She's not afraid to admit she's in love with the very fiber of your being. But she is afraid to admit that, even if she wasn't, you'd still have her wrapped around your finger.

~•~

"Get away from her." It's harsher than she intended and it definitely startled you, but it got the point across.

"Chae?" You questioned as you were practically yanked to Rosé's side.

"Don't grab her like that." Lisa said with a frown.

Rosé's resolve slipped for a second. Maybe she shouldn't have grabbed you but that was besides the point now.

"I said stay away from her."

Lisa put her hands up in mock surrender, "Look. Sorry. Didn't know she had a girlfriend."

"She's no-" Lisa walked deeper into the throng of people before you could finish your sentence.

You turned back to Chaeyoung with a frown.

"What the hell was that, Chae?"

That was a good question. One that she didn't exactly have an answer to. She glanced down to where her hand was still gripping your forearm. She let go silently.

"I-um...."

With a roll of your eyes you pulled Rosé through the crowd. You searched for an empty room, quickly finding an unoccupied bedroom.

You close the door behind you two. Finally, some peace and quiet.

You crossed your arms and looked on expectantly.

"Well?"

Chaeyoung's face scrunched up, like she was losing a hard fought battle with herself, "You don't get it do you?

"Get what? Why you pulled me away from Lisa? No. I don't."

Rosé wiped her hands over her face roughly, "I did that be-because....your mine. Or at least, I want you to be."

Your arms fell to your sides, and your face softened into confusion.

"Huh?"

"God. I thought I was being obvious. I thought I was being so obvious." Chaeyoung shook her hand before sitting on the edge of the bed.

"But, you're flirty with everyone?"

"There's a difference between being nice to someone and being irrevocably in love with you."

You scrambled for any words, any explanation that could help you describe your confusion, and quite frankly you're embarrassment. It seemed as though you had put her in the same position you had thought she put you in.

"I-"

"It's okay if you don't feel the same way. As long as we can still be friends. I just had to finally tell you with words. We can still be friends right?" She doesn't look at you as she speaks. Her eyes casted down onto her wringing hands in her lap.

You move slowly towards her, grabbing her hands in her lap, "I love you too. I'm sorry I didn't say anything before-I thought...I thought...well it doesn't matter what I thought. I just-I love you too. A lot."

Chaeyoung looked up at you, a stray tear falling from her eye, "You do?"

You nod, "I do." You leaned in towards her, taking her bottom lip softly between yours. And she kisses you back, it isn't hungry, but it passionate, and somehow that serves to turn you on more.

You pushed her back slightly and straddled her lap.

Chaeyoung seemed to not know what to do with this turn of events, so you helped her along. Grabbing her hands and placing them on your ass.

"Oh."

You breathed out a chuckle into her mouth, "Yeah. Oh."

Chaeyoung let herself be pushed backwards onto the bed. She grabbed at the zipper to your dress. Fumbling with it until it finally did what she had been willing it today.

She pulled the dress delicately over your head, pushing it onto the floor beneath your feet, "You're beautiful." She whispered into your neck.

You tried to hide your blush by turning your head as much as you could away from her.

"Don't hide from me. Not anymore."

You turned back to her. Your blush covering your face in full force. Chaeyoung leaned in and kissed you again.

You fumbled with her clothing just as she did with yours. A sense of urgency encompassing the both of you. Like you only had so little time to make up for the time you lost.

You're not even sure how you ended up on your back and further up the bed, but you are sure that Rosé touching you, on the outside and inside feels like being thrown head first into a volcano. And you finally come undone it's just like an eruption that you can't (nor want) to stop.

The same goes for Rosé. Having you taste her feels like she's drowning in the world's shallowest pool. It's like swimming in a puddle. Impossible, yet satisfying beyond belief. And when she finally comes undone it's just being evaporated into the summer sun.

When it's all over and you're laying on top, amd underneath, and through each other, Rosé speaks up, "I love you."

"I know." And you did.

Because,

You and Chaeyoung were best friends, and you were always meant to fall in love.

You knew that, like you knew the back of Chaeyoung's hand.

[khaleesiofalicante]

I'm so ready for this chapter

I'm a simple person. I see David, I get automatically happy. I'm a little late cause yesterday I couldn't find the time, but here I am once again:

"The London Institute stood before him, all glorious and redeemed – once again holding a beautiful love story of its own." Its only the beginning and David thinking poetry is my reason to live. ALSO, YESSS LONDON INSTITUTE

Ah yes, Kit running the London Institute is just amazing

"At moments like this, David wished he had magic too. He wished he could protect Max from all the people who tried to hurt him. He had seen the way people had hurt Max’s brother and his father. He would never let that happen to Max." My heart beats in Mavid!!

“Are you two sharing a room?”  “I won’t tell the Consul," And " He didn’t think sharing a room with his son would do him any favours." had me laughing so hard 😂😂

"It was not easy to get accepted into Columbia University, but Rafael had managed since he was one of the smartest people David knew." I'm so proud of my baby!! 🥺🥺

“I bought you some scones.”jseyjwiwjdh 😏

"He was in David’s arms. His face buried in David’s neck." OH MY GOD. I JUST CANT WITH TO MUCH CUTENESS!!

Ok, I won't quote it but the scene where David saw the portraits is just so beautiful like... Ugh I love my Herondales and David so much!!

Okayy, I dont know who this guy is, so I'll keep my mind open

"Because I know you, David wanted to say. I just wish I knew what’s in your heart too." Ysgsksubdn THIS!  Could I possibly love David more than I love him already??

"Of course I do. My Bapa would be personally offended otherwise.” Yup, I can confirm it

"Max often pretended like people’s words didn’t hurt him - just as he pretend that fire doesn’t burn or wounds don’t bleed.

But David knew, just beyond the surface, Max burned and bled like everyone else.

Despite his reputation as a ‘drama queen’ Max never let other people see his pain. He used humour and theatrics to hide it away." I feel this on a personal level

The mundane illnesses around shadowhunters is getting me worried ngl

"Until that, their only hope was Catarina Loss. David hoped someone sent that woman a fruit basket every single day for she went above and beyond to help shadowhunters affected by the mundane illnesses." She is such a Queen. Just. RESPECT

"Jackson Hayward" Mmm, I feel like I should know that name but I dont remember

KITTY CONTENT IS JUST *CHEF KISS*

“I’m not judging,” David smiled as he adjusted Max’s beanie. “You look very cute.” Max,’s cheeks turned purple again. David wondered why. He wondered if it had something to do with him. (David, I love you, but seriously???)

"Of course, the 'fun' mostly entailed Rafael stopping Georgia from drinking random potions she found in the stalls, Selena stopping Lexi from opening a psychic booth to help people talk to Raziel and of course David stopping Max from running to the gambling booths." 😂 I love how Selena, Rafael and David are the responsables and Max, Gigi and Lexi are the chaotic ones

THE GRUPO CHAT 😂😂😂

“Perhaps an unpublished snippet from the Beautiful Cordelia?” and “I do have a correspondence between an Iblis demon and Christopher Lightwood" just got me like: 😮😮

Oh god the necklace!!

"Most importantly, he didn’t want to cover his scar. He didn’t want to hide it. He wasn’t ashamed of it. It wasn’t a mark of a victim. It was the mark of a survivor." I'm so proud of David 💙

“I never wanted to be protected,” David had replied. “I only ever wanted to be loved.” 💙💙 this just hits so much

"Magnus Bane carried so much love inside himself you could literally feel it through him." YEAH, I would like to add this to the book of the two million reasons why I love Magnus Bane

That escalated quickly. Like... Jackson hit Max? And David hit Jackson? What?

“This is what I get for falling for a Lightwood-Bane,” I mean... Honey you knew what you were getting into

“I do love it when the quiet ones go feral," and “David! Is your hand okay?” just describes Magnus and Jace perfectly 😂

“Well, technically they are residents of the institute,” Tiberius pushed back his glasses. “So, as the Head of the insti-” “Babe, no!” Kit shushed his boyfriend. (OH GOD THEY ARE BEAUTIFUL!! 💙)

“It’s alright, Chouchou,” Mr Herondale ran a hand through David’s hair. “Next time, just-” “Use my words?” David asked. “Just don’t get caught,” the man winked. “Jace!” the Consul hissed. “What do you want me to say to him, Alec?” the man demanded. “Be nice? This is David we are talking about! You can’t get nicer than this!” “David, I appreciate you standing up for Max,” the Consul said. “But next time, please try not to punch anyone in the face.” “Yes, sir,” David nodded. “Because it’s wrong.” “Because it means more paperwork for me,” the Consul groaned and then straightened up. “But yes. Absolutely. Very wrong. No punching people!” (I'm sorry, I just had to quote all of it cause I laughed way to hard😂)

I knew that name was familiar!! Oh, god this is a plot twist. Oh my precious boy must be protected at all cost!!! HE DESERVES HAPPINES!

"It made David want to kiss him. But then the Consul spoke, and David reminded himself he didn’t want to be the third person to get punched in the face this evening." David fearing Alec never fails to make me laugh 😂😂

But if he tries to hurt you-” “You will unleash hell?” David chuckled. “Worse,” the other man grinned. “I will unleash Lexi.” It was definitely much worse. (Hell yeah, she is amazing!)

FUCK, now I want to protect Jackson with my whole soul  from the nightmares and everything else🥺🥺

Wow. I feel like I should quote lots of things from all that scene, but its just that it was all so amazing and I wouldn't finish. Like... The story, telling each other their past, talking about therapy. (Kit is right, shadowhunter need therapy!!) They would really be an amazing group

Also, David reading to Jackson was so wholesome 🥺🥺 and the whole scene was deep and beautiful!!

Yess, my boys going to therapy giving priority to their mental health is my sterotonine supply

"Well, I hope it works out well for you,” Jackson grinned. “What is that supposed to mean?” “You know what it means,” Jackson grinned harder. “Also, if that wanker tries to break your heart, I will break his face.” “You know he is the Consul’s son?” David giggled.“I’ve done it once and I will do it again,” Jackson shrugged. “He better treat you right.” “Stop it!” David had blushed and hugged him tighter, saying goodbye once more. (I STAN THIS FRIENDSHIP!!)

"Selena had broken the news that she was enrolling into Scholomance next month.This family was his soul." YESS, SELENA IS A QUEEN

"After the twins went to bed, David stepped out of the institute and went looking for his heart." ajkeyejdodj he is just to pure 🥺🥺

"At first it had felt odd. A little unsteady. And then somewhere along the way, Max’s heartbeat had become the steadiest thing in David’s life. Max, with all his chaos and drama and danger, had become the steadiest thing in David’s life." Thanks, I'm emo 🥺💙💙

"Even if Max loved him…Could Max possibly love him as much David loved the other boy?" MY HEART!!

"His love for Max was endless and impossible. Did Max love him like that? Impossibly?" JDHWJSUDH🥺🥺

“Maxwell Lightwood-Bane,” David whispered. “Love is your birth right.”

"One minute he had been laughing at the portal, his heart full of pride. The next, he was in Max’s arms, kissing the other boy." HOLY SHIT THIS WAS BEAUTIFUL!! ALL OF IT!! AND DAVID FALLING TO THE POND? *LOTS OF CHEF KISSES*

UGH I LOVED THIS CHAPTER SO MUCH AND I COULD GO EXPLAINING EVERYTHING, BUT IT WOULD MAKE THIS WAY LONGER THAT IT ALREAY IS

Anyway, David is beautiful. I stan Mavid and we love Jackson 💙💙

This was so beautiful. I love how much you and appreciate David 🥺 It makes so emotional send help 😭😭😭😭

Also this is David Tiktok 🤣🤭😎

[haloud]

day 7- uranus

Michael rolls his head over the back of the lawn chair, closing his eyes, letting all the tension out of his neck and shoulders. Then he blinks his eyes open, staring up at the stars. They’re faint, light pollution from the nearby town, his eyes too unadjusted thanks to the crackling fire at his feet. He’d have to stare straight up for a long time to pick out most of his favorite stars, but the Big Dipper is an old friend, so he’s content.

A car pulls up, and then there are footsteps on the gravel approaching him. He takes a second before looking up. He likes it, that people know they can find him here in the early night. Likes that people do.

“Hey, uh…Michael?”

Michael sits up so fast he cricks his neck at the sound of Max’s voice. Wincing, he rubs it and says, “Well look what the Chupacabra dragged in.”

“Um, yeah,” Max says, doing that awkward thing he does where he rubs the knuckles of both hands together, a nervous habit he’s had most of his life. Michael kicks the chair next to him.

“Sit down, stop hovering.”

Max sits. His long legs sprawl a little too close to the fire, but Michael doesn’t say anything that might get mistaken for nagging, for taking too much care. Anything that might start a fight.

“So I’m guessing you noticed I’ve, uh, not been around a lot lately.”

Michael gropes for a beer from the sixer at his feet and pops it with his brain, taking a deep swig. If Max wants one, he can ask for it, he thinks mulishly, then hands him one anyway.

“You could say that,” Michael says shortly.

“I’m…sorry. I…learned something about our history that I don’t know how to…”

“Oh yeah?” Michael drawls. “’Bout six foot one, beard oil connoisseur, really shitty accent he thinks no one can tell is fake?”

“No, not him. This is something a little closer to home. And I didn’t know how to talk to you about it, so I…but that wasn’t fair to you. Trust me, I’ve heard that plenty from Isobel and Maria. Even Alex dropped by the Pony to give me a piece of his mind.”

“Oh yeah?” Michael says, keeping his voice impressively level. The idea that anyone would stick up for him over Max ignoring him is…not something he knows what to do with.

“Yeah, man. Scary stuff.”

Max laughs without a shred of humor, chugging half his beer at once.

“Okay, now I’m worried,” Michael says. “Just spit it out, man. I’m sure it’s nothing worse than any other shit we’ve dealt with. I am numb to bombshells at this point.”

It’s a long time before Max says anything else. Michael finishes his beer, doesn’t grab another one, just watches the leaping flames in Max’s eyes.

“A few months back when Sheriff Valenti was after me for killing Noah, she sat me down to talk about all the ways I fit the profile. Y’know, uh, white male, 18-40, anger issues...One of those ways was, uh. Troubled childhood. Tried to tell her my childhood was fine, but she pointed out that wandering the desert naked at seven years old isn’t exactly a lack of trouble. Turns out she was the deputy on our case, back then.”

“Huh.”

Explains a few things about the way she used to look at him every time he got hauled in, before she just got used to it.

“She told me that she came to see us in the group home the day Isobel and I were adopted.” Max takes a deep breath.

Stop. Michael wants to tell him to stop. Doesn’t want, doesn’t need to hear what comes next. Doesn’t remember that day, doesn’t have to. He knows, enough, from what people have told him. Can hear the screams, see the red on the walls.

“Good for her,” he grunts.

“She told me that—fuck, Michael, there’s no good way to say this—she said that. That I was the one screaming and drawing on the walls, that you…you calmed me down, but…it was too late, and the Evanses had the wrong idea, and that’s why you were left...” Max chokes off, puts a hand over his eyes. Michael doesn’t have to have his and Isobel’s connection to recognize the awful emotion crushing him.

Michael opens another beer.

“Say something,” Max almost begs.

“Why.”

Michael has to swallow around the lump in his throat, his rabbiting heartbeat.

“Why even tell me this? What fucking good does it do? I can’t—you can’t—nobody can change what happened, even if I believe you—”

“You deserved to know.”

“I wish you hadn’t told me. Since when does the world give a fuck about what I deserve?”

Max flinches. It doesn’t make Michael feel any better. Just like putting a fist in his face wouldn’t make him feel better, and neither would screaming at the world for not being fair. He did a lot of that when he was a child and still believed in a few things that might be listening.

He doesn’t take another beer, if only because only something stronger would put a dent in the feelings he wants to drown, and he doesn’t keep any of that shit around.

“Whatever. It all worked out in the end, yeah? The guy who doesn’t murder people with his hands got the short end of the stick and was therefore responsible for disposin’ of a few less bodies. Highlight of my fuckin’ life, that one. You’re welcome.”

His mind doesn’t go easy on him, whirling with images and thoughts from Max tied to the bed, Max exploding and killing Father Davis to, absurdly, would Alex have ever noticed me if I was preppy Michael Evans. He laughs just to do something with his mouth that isn’t screaming, clenching his left hand into a fist and squeezing the knuckles, though it isn’t as much of a distraction now as it used to be, without the pain.

“Hey, you wanna thank me, make me some business cards—Michael Guerin, mechanic, gravedigger, and total fuckin’ mug—”

He breaks off into more laughter, until he’s bent double, clutching his knees and wheezing.

Max hasn’t said a fuckin’ word.

“Well?” Michael demands, straightening up, looking Max in the eye.

“I don’t know, Michael, I don’t know! I don’t know what to do with any of it, I don’t know what to do with, with you, with everything you’ve sacrificed for Isobel and for me, I don’t know how to be worthy of it, I don’t know how to thank you, I don’t, I don’t know.”

Michael rocks back in his chair, face pointed up at the sky again, drinking in the constellations until he covers his eyes with his hands and lets out a shout of frustration. Everything around them not bolted down lifts and inch and slams back down for emphasis.

Calmer, then, Michael says, “We were seven year old newborns. I’m pretty sure I didn’t do it for gratitude.”

“No, you couldn’t have. Which means you just did it on instinct. It’s just who you are. You protect us, and we, and we…”

“Don’t,” Michael cuts him off, wearily. He doesn’t need to hear any self-recriminations.

“No, Michael, come on. The things you’ve done, the ways you’ve been hurt, you…there aren’t words to describe the gratitude, I just...Thank you, Michael.”

The only sound after that is the crackling fire, and in that silence, Michael floats Max over another beer.

It would be easier if Michael could resent him. If he could want to go back and do it all over again without knowing in a place deep enough in him it could be his cells or a sickness that he’d do the exact same thing, go through all that hell a second time, a third.

“Nobody can change the past,” he says eventually. It’s something Sanders used to say to him any time he made a mistake, when he was just a kid and learning and not a certified ace mechanic who ought to know better. It’s weird, to Michael, right here and right now, having the wisdom of somebody else in his mouth.

This life hasn’t had all bad things.

“But we can try and change the future,” Max says. “I know I’ve done a hell of a job of it these past weeks, but I don’t want to pretend like we don’t know this. I want things to be better between us. I want to be a better brother.”

“Oh yeah? Like how?” Michael’s voice slips into mockery; he doesn’t try to prevent it. “Find me a job that you don’t want? Toss me a hand me down phone when you get an upgrade? Biweekly pity parties? Been there, done that, was given the t-shirt against my will.”

“Yeah, okay, maybe! Just not like that, man, we’re not kids anymore. Maybe we could, I don’t know, try to figure out what being better means together? No more sacrifices. No more charity.”

Michael picks at the label of his latest empty bottle. 

Voice quiet, almost inaudible over the crackle of the fire, Max says, “Dude, my heart only beats because of what you did for me. I came back to life knowing that. This just puts it into perspective.”

“I didn’t do that alone. Liz and Valenti were just as important. More. Rosa kickstarted you. I was just the assist.”

“Michael.” 

“What?”

“What do you need from me? What will help you understand how much you mean to Isobel and me. It’s not charity, man. It’s family. We keep saying that, but I think we need to do a better job defining it, you know?”

What does he need. It’s such a rare question he doesn’t know the answer.

“Free drinks at the Pony for life, a nice, cozy alibi, and your head on a pike instead of mine when Maria finds out.” he says.

Max laughs, the sound strained but genuine, his head thrown back to face the stars.

[justasparkwritings]

Codename Cupid: Chapter 5

Previous: Codename First Heartbreak 

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook X OFC/PI, Mentions of Kim Seokjin X OFC

Genre: Secret AgentAU, AgentAU, Light Strangers to Lovers AU

Rating: PG13

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: Swearing, Legal Alcohol Consumption

Summary: The search for Kim Seokjin begins, and our PI makes an unexpected acquaintance. 

Searching for Seokjin 

Present Day

         I’ll admit, the heartbreak Euna endured at the hands of Kim Seokjin felt a little too real, a little too personal, a little too familiar. Reading the chapters in her manifesto that detailed the love she had for him, reminded me of listening to Kacey Musgrave’s first album and asking, to no one in particular, who hurt you?

        Whether or not he realized it, their five-month triste had set in motion the ways in which Euna moved through her relationships with men. It was clear that their college love story created deep seated insecurity, one that caused her to shy away from dating. Shy away, and then lean in fully and totally in a manner that would make Charles Manson go “whoa step back”. But that’s a story for later, because Seokjin never felt the extend of Euna’s love. No, that was reserved for Min Yoongi. But again, a story for another time.  

        Kim Seokjin, being first on the list, was the first man I wanted to track down. He had practically no social media presence, no LinkedIn or job profiles, no known address. All Euna had to go off of was he worked at some bank in New York, but that was after graduation. Five years later, she didn’t know if he’d still be there.

        “Hi, I am calling for a Mr. Kim,” I say into my phone.

        “Which Mr. Kim would you be referencing?” The receptionist asks.

        “Kim Seokjin,” I respond.

        “Hmm, I do not have a Kim Seokjin in the directory,” She says.

        “Do you happen to have a forwarding number or address?” I ask.

        “No, unfortunately not. Is there anything else I can help you with?”

        “No, thank you,” I hang up and gently set my phone on my desk. Of course, he didn’t still work there, what promising young man would stay at a mid-tier firm when he had the potential for such greatness, as Euna described?

        I pick up my phone and dial my favorite number.

        “If this is to ask me to search something for you illegally, the answer is no,” My sister says, not bothering to begin our chat with any formality.

        “C, you know I have full access to the state database,” I remind her, twirling in my chair.

        “Then what’s your question?” She demands.

        “I need a national search,” I inform her.

        “No,” C says.

        “Come on, please?” I ask.

        “No,” She says again.

        “You know you’re the golden child, mom and dad already love you more, so can you help me out?” I plead.

        “You get one chance a year to use the ‘mom and dad’ card,” She reminds me.

        “Sis, this is an extenuating circumstance,” I tell her.

        “Lies,” She responds.

        “I’ll pay you,” I offer.

        “You do know the NSA taps these phones?” She whispers, knowing full well I do.

        I laugh a little too hard, “Then why are you absolutely dragging me?”

        “I can’t,” She tells me, voice returning to normal volume.

        “Fine.” I say, fingers moving swiftly over the keypad of my phone.

        “Why do you insist on putting me on speaker?” She groans.

        “It’s easier, I have many things to do,” I remind her.

        “Sure, you do, like find the pennies you lost in the couch. Still enough for rent, right?”

        “You can be such a bitch, you know that?” I snap.

        “You still coming out with us on Friday?” She changes subjects fluidly.

        “Well, I wasn’t-

        “You are coming, when’s the last time you, you know, hooked up?” She asks delicately.

        “I thought we were being tapped?” I laugh callously.

        “No no, that’s what you’re not doing,” She reciprocates.

        “You’re the worst, and I hate you,” I tell her.

        “Wear something revealing,” She suggests.

        “Don’t slut shame me,” I say.

        “You’re insufferable,” She responds.

        “Love you, mean it,” I tell her.

        “Love you, mean it,” She replies.

        If I know my sister, and I do, better than she realizes, tonight at the club she’ll have the information I need, the information to help me find not only Kim Seokjin, but the lot of them.

~~~~~

        Dressing in what my sister would ultimately call a boring, going to work outfit, I hopped into the Uber. I knew better than to drive, the full extent of the evening outlined in detail in a message from C. She always planned elaborate nights out, which resulted in black outs, drunk hook ups and dirty dancing. C wanted the nights to remain perfect blurred memories, fuzzy in our minds, growing more and more hazy as the years progressed. She knows well enough to schedule them quarterly, if not twice a year max, maintaining their elusiveness. She invites only the best of the best, her favorite people, and being the single younger sister, I am the pet project of all her married friends. It’s fucking excruciating. I would rather be shaving my legs dry than spend a drunken night with her friends who all remember me as the braces wearing tween they met me as.

        Tonight, will be no different.

        I enter the club, no cover, and slip my bomber jacket off as I walk towards the bar. My sister sits on a stool, laughing uproariously at her girlfriends, shoulders exposed as she downs what I’m assuming is a Lemon Drop. Spotting me, she waves.

        “You’re here!” She yells and eyes me up and down. “So glad you tried.”

        “I put make up on,” I tell her, blinking my eyes slowly enough that she can see the shadow and attempt at eyeliner. “I’m even wearing foundation.”

        “Wow, and what tween did you learn that from?” She asks, flagging down the bartender.

        I don’t dignify her question with a response, in turn favoring the bartender. He stares at me expectantly, “Tequila, shaken,” I turn to count the party, “Ten shots.”

        He nods before grabbing what I assume is the cheapest tequila from the shelf.

        “For you?” Elise asks.

        “For all of us,” I say winking. The bartender sets the shots down before asking if I want to close my tab. I nod, handing him my card without thinking.

        “Really? Two shots and you’re done for the night?” C asks me.

        “No, I just won’t be paying for them,” I reply laughing. Together we down our shots before turning to the dance floor. It’s a mess of sweating bodies, the neon lights illuminating fractions of everyone’s face, a nose here, an ear there, lips entangled over the beat of a Dua Lipa song. Clothing, soaked to the bone, clinging relentlessly onto everyone’s skin as they sweat through the music, liquor moving their limbs in wild gestures, inhibitions down, booties dropping. It’s euphoria and chaos, pleasure and sin.

        I fucking love it.

        My sister and I, though very different, have always had a shared love of dancing. Music bumping through speakers, full volume never being enough, in our blood. A part of us from our father, uniting our waring personas across decades, across the globe, and tonight, across the floor. Is there anything as blissful as dancing, hips swaying, arms overhead, lungs burning as we shout the lyrics. Heavenly.

        I retreat from the dance floor to the bar, waiting patiently for the bartender to notice my presence.

        “You look so happy out there,” A man says from behind me. I turn, surprised to see someone seated on the stool behind me. I truly almost sat on him.

        “Oh, hi, yeah, thanks,” I reply, smiling softly.

        “Do you think you could spare me a dance?” He asks, blush coating his cheeks.

        “Tell me this,” I say, eyes absorbing his Bambi like orbs, “How many fingers does Yoda have?”

        “Depends, which movie you’re talking about,” He smiles, and I swear I’ve been shot in the heart. No one should be this stunning in a dimly lit club, which means he’s going to be breathtaking in the light of day.

        “So how many?” I repeat.

        “Three in one film, two in another,” His nose scrunches.

        “Are you a nerd or just really into bar trivia?” I ask.

        “A bit of both,” He’s still smiling, and I’m wounded again.

        “Good to know,” I laugh lightly.

        “Can I buy you a drink?” He offers.

        “I thought you wanted a dance,” I remind him, winking.

        “Can I have both?” He asks, left eyebrow raising.

        “Depends,” I say smirking.

        “On?”

        “What are you drinking?” I ask.

        “Is this your game? Ask me questions to extrapolate information so you can decide if you’re interested?” He doesn’t mean to blast me, but he does.

        “Oo, you do read me so well,” I wink, a poor attempt at keeping any pretense or posture intact. “Tequila shot, shaken, lemon wedge, no salt.”

        He orders two shots and looks me over.

        “You’re gorgeous,” He says, sincerity in his eyes.

        “You are too,” I reply, eliciting a laugh from him.

        “Are you usually this forthcoming?”

        “Absolutely not, when you get to know me, you’ll see how closed off I truly am,” I thank the bartender before grabbing my shot. “To strangers in bars,”

        “And lovers amongst the stars,” He replies.

        “Shakespeare?” I smile again before tossing my shot back. “How’s about that dance?”

        “On one condition,” He stands, towering over me, his black hair moving like a curtain in front of his eyes.

        “What could that possibly be?” I ask, hand already reaching for his.

        “Tell me your name,” He uses his new hold on my hand to pull me close to him, chests pressing against one another’s.

        I stand on my tiptoes, pressing my already flushed cheek against his. “Y/N,” I say, lips grazing his decorated ear.

        He turns slightly, ensuring my cheek remains against his. “Jungkook,” His voice is husky, deep and resonating. It shivers through my body, the heat from him mixing with the anticipation building. Pulling away, he smiles again, “Let’s dance.”

Next: Codename Another Shot at Love Pt. 1

[purplesurveys]

1159

survey by -egocentricity-

Describe the last time you...

Went swimming: It was in Nasugbu with Angela, Sofie, and Gab nearly a couple of years ago. We wanted to go to a nearby beach before the semester started, so we planned the trip at the last minute and literally just right after we enrolled for our classes.

Went on a date: It was at BGC at this nice, romantic French restaurant. Then as we headed back to the car we spotted a jazz bar that had a live band performing, so we took a detour there to have drinks and nachos.

Were hurt by someone you love: My mom says a lot of hurtful things all the time I’ve stopped keeping track of them and letting them affect me too much, but I’m sure she’s done it recently.

Did something nice for yourself: I got myself a night lamp to improve the ambience in my room and make it feel even more homey. The lamp I had before it was just something I borrowed from my parents and it had white light, so it didn’t feel the most calming. The one I have right now emits this soft yellow shade that makes me feel infinitely more relaxed.

Did something nice for someone else: I ordered KFC at like 1 AM last Wednesday because I was feeling hungry and there was nothing at home that could meet my cravings, and aside from getting orders for my parents I also got a Zinger for my delivery driver as a way to thank him and lift his spirits for working that late into the night.

Were injured: I always sport some sort of scratch or gash somewhere on my body these days from playing with Cooper. This morning I got a new wound on one of my knuckles since he was pulling on his leash way too hard when I was walking him.

Went to the hospital: I had to take blood and urine tests last May to figure out what was wrong with me since I had been sick for a week by that point. That was also during the peak of the pandemic, so there was a lot of anxiety about me catching Covid. It turned out to be a UTI, and even though that technically sucks the whole family was relieved it wasn’t Covid.

Understood something that previously confused you: I had my dad explain to me how buying and bidding for houses works. Hahaha I am sooooo not equipped to be a fully-functioning adult.

Faked sick to get out of going to class: I don’t think I ever did this. If I had wanted to skip class, I just skipped it.

Hung out with your friends: I went to Perfy’s with 7 friends shortly before it shut down for good as a result of the pandemic. We had some beer and bar chow, and to be completely frank it felt quite nice to have that one night where things felt normal again, as ignorant as it was. We vaped until we were dizzy and some of them smoked too much that the smell ended up clinging to me and my clothes, but luckily I got home when my whole family was already in their rooms so no one was able to smell me.

Met someone new: There’s this girl who recently got onboarded to one of our client brands and we started working with her about a week or two ago. She’s honestly been a bit over the place, but I’m giving her the benefit of the doubt because she’s fairly new at a particularly hectic time in her workplace. My first impression of her was that she gave such a strong UP vibe so I looked her up on Facebook, and it turns out we went to the same college and the same high school.

Did something that you were afraid to do: A couple of months ago I had a one-on-one video call organized by the CEO of my employer so that she could get to know me better. She was super nice and listened attentively to my answers to all her questions, but it was easy to tell she wanted to see what I could bring to the table and how well I could mesh with the team especially since I’ve never met her and everyone else in person, so I made sure my social game was maxed out for those 15 minutes haha.

Did something you promised you would never do: I vaped literally half an hour ago. I never expected to form a habit out of it especially after being vehemently against any form of smoking for most of my life. Not particularly proud of it but then again I’m here for a good time and not a long time lmao.

Regretted something: Lazada had this huge app-wide sale last week and their Hydro Flasks were like ₱600 cheaper, but I didn’t buy it because I was feeling stingy that day haha. Now the products are back to their normal price and they’ll probably never get to be that cheap again :( There’s another sale happening tomorrow but the discounts aren’t as big, but I’ll probably place an order this time.

Went shopping: I went to H&M last January to get Andi a late Christmas present. I asked Leigh what they would appreciate as a gift, and she told me they’d wanted to start experimenting with feminine clothes so I got them a nice black skirt and this really elegant dress (that I honestly wanted for myself). I heard they cried once they opened the paper bag, and making people cry with the gifts you get them will always be one of the best feelings ever haha.

Asked someone out/were asked out: Idk, it was 5 years ago and nothing I want to remember anymore.

Broke up with someone: I’ve never broken up with someone.

Had someone break up with you: It was terrible and the stuff of all my nightmares combined, and it happened in the middle of an already-shitty month to boot so I had little hope for myself to come out of it alive. I had everything planned and ironed out and all that was left was for me to leave. 

It’s been 7 months and I’ve never felt emotionally and mentally better and healthier.

Were heartbroken: I follow this animal rescue NGO on Facebook and they regularly post about dogs who’ve lived through awful situations and need urgent care and forever homes to live in. Fortunately the page has a wide reach and regularly gets support, and I try to donate to their bank account as often as I can.

You were angry with someone: Haven’t directed my anger towards anyone in a while.

You felt "in love" with someone: It was during the time I was still reeling over the breakup and was caught in an endless loop of still being in love with them and forcing myself to finally detach.

You wanted something unrealistic: I was at the rooftop this morning and I could feel the temperature getting warmer every hour, and when I finally couldn’t tolerate the heat and was forced to go back indoors I felt super annoyed because all I want is to live somewhere with a chilly climate all-year round hahaha UGH

You made someone angry: It was when I spilled a tiny drop of soup onto the dining table and my mom had a complete meltdown about it. After 89457843957 years of her getting mad at First World Problems I wasn’t intimidated by her anymore, but it still irked me at how something so little can piss her off so I just decided not to speak a word for the rest of the night.

You made someone's day: I hope I made my delivery driver’s night when I got him his burger as a surprise. I hold so much respect and appreciation for them considering they’ve been working very hard to get people’s goods to their doorsteps in the midst of a global pandemic.

Tried something new: When I bought my lamp it was the first time I got something to decorate my room. I usually spend all my money on food, so that was a nice change to try out.

Tried your best: I always try my best at work and to make each day more improved than the last.

Didn't try at all: A couple of nights ago I asked my dad to light up my scented candle and he challenged me to try lighting up a matchstick by myself for once. I was all primed and ready to go, but backed out at the last second :(( I told him there was a big chance I could freak out, drop the lit matchstick. and set something in the dining room (where we were) on fire, and that’s when he gave up and just lit it up himself hahaha

Got nothing for your efforts: I’d gladly refer you to my big waste of a 6-year relationship.

Had a serious talk with someone: I always have deep conversations with Andi and they’ve been about various topics over the last few months.

Told someone how you really feel: It was when Bea scheduled a quick one-on-one catch-up call with me to check up on how I was doing with work and if I was doing okay with the everyday craziness of it all. But I didn’t say anything grave; I just told her I honestly like the work we do and that it’s nice that it keeps me excited everyday, so there’s little to complain about.

Hid what you felt from someone: One of my co-workers, Denise, is honestly a little challenging to work with. I always have to pick up after her and remind her of stuff we need to do together, and even Bea has let a few comments slide between us about how difficult she can be. But considering I’m a lot newer than her and we’ve never met each other I’ve stayed quiet for now.

Took something that didn't belong to you: I got the matchbox from my parents’ room to ask one of them to light up the aforementioned scented candle I have.

Borrowed something from someone: I borrowed one of my sister’s cords the other evening to charge my vape pen.

Lost a game: This was when my orgmates and I played a couple Jeopardy games over Zoom about a month ago and I lost to Robin.

Won a game: Not sure, I don’t really play a lot of games.

Told someone you love him/her: Jo, after she shared that she tested positive for Covid.

Went on vacation: It’s been a year and a half and the world has changed a lot since then, but my family and I went to Tagaytay and Cavite for a quick weekend getaway; it was Tagaytay on Saturday then we drove to another hotel in Cavite the next day. We played Heads Up, ate Jelly Belly jellybeans, had a lot of nice food, took some walks, but then I also had to work on a Powerpoint in between because I had a presentation that was due that Monday lol.

Went on a roadtrip: Last January we drove to Tagaytay (again) for my dad’s 50th birthday. Before heading to our accommodation we had brunch at La Creperie where we happened to be seated beside Larry Gadon – bleck – and his wife. Then we headed to the condo unit where we stayed the night at, ordered a samgyupsal set, and I watched GMM’s Let’s Talk About That into the night until I fell asleep.

Flew on a plane: That would be over two years ago and it was during our vacation to Bicol. That also marks the last time I ever spoke a word to my brother, because on our way home my family got into a heated argument and he ended up slapping me in the face. I don’t tolerate physical acts of violence, and especially not from someone younger than me, so I was more than glad to cut ties with him moving forward.

Were annoyed with a family member: My mom is politically incorrect 24/7, and it grinds my gears 24/7.

Took something too far: Idk, maybe cutting off ties with Gab. A part of me wanted to reconnect at some point, once I’ve healed; but I’ve reached a point in my life where that doesn’t seem so necessary anymore. Life just works funnily sometimes, I guess. I haven’t completely cut her off; we’re still mutuals on Twitter (though she also never uses it so it barely counts), and also still Facebook friends (though I’ve unfollowed her and I’ve also blacklisted her from seeing my posts – thank god for that feature), so now it’s really just a matter of pressing some buttons and finally disconnecting for good.

Gave up too soon: I wanted to learn riding a bike during the early days of the pandemic last year, but I gave up after like two days of being unsuccessful.

Listened to a band you had not heard before: I started exploring some of BTS’ music earlier this week after weeks of just knowing Dynamite.

Judged someone: Some of the bloggers that I regularly correspond with for work, and who’ve recently added me on Facebook, have opinions I don’t necessarily agree with.

Asked a "stupid question": I ask a lot of newbie questions at work that maybe some people would consider dumb, but I’d rather get answers to do my work correctly than take guesses and end up doing the wrong thing.

Got "a stupid answer": Not sure.

Took a picture of something/someone: I recently took a photo of my work desk setup so I could show off my new pretty lamp, hahaha.

Told a lie: I told my mom my Hydro Flask is still with Angela and that I should be getting it soon, but I really lost it a few years ago and would have to buy a new one.

Told the truth: Idk I tell the truth all the time.

[axwalker]

We used to be friends

To catch up : One decision.

Book: The Royal Romance (half AU/half canon or my HC anyway…)

Pairing: Drake x Mc Drake x Liam (friendship?)

Disclaimer:  Drake, Liam and Valtoria belong to Pixelberry.

A/N: This is  Prompt #32 “I’ve never lied to you” from @emceesynonymroll​  Wacky Drabbles (Thank you for hosting this!)

Word count: 1500 (Sorry! I really tried)

This is my personal opinion on the reasons that drive Liam and Drake to act as crazy as they are acting in TRH. 

Tagging: @emceesynonymroll​ @mskaneko​ @pedudley​ @burnsoslow​ @princessleac1​

Liam and Drake usually met on his personal quarters but when Drake had called, the solemn tone in his voice had made Liam set the meeting at his royal office. He didn’t know what Drake wanted, but something told him he wasn’t going to be pleased about it.

He sighed thinking about their friendship, it definitely had taken a toll since the day Drake had finally come clean about his feelings for her.

Well, come clean was not really the best way to describe it, after all, he had discovered their relationship when he was on one knee, proposing. He could still feel the pain, not only because of her rejection but because of his best friend’s betrayal. Months and months of lying and deceiving from the person he trusted the most in the world.

Their friends didn’t judge Drake because they only saw one lie, one deception. But they both knew it was much more than that. It was the hundreds of nights drinking whiskey in his bar while he talked hours about her as Drake listened and nodded without once hinting that their friendship had become something else. It was all the times he had confided in his best friend after she had canceled on him once again, and Drake had comforted him while knowing that he was the reason behind it. It was the day he had told him he was going to propose, and Drake had congratulated him without admitting the truth.

So no, it wasn’t one lie, one time. It had been hundreds of them, months of them.

Of course, he was aware of how emotionally crippled Drake was. Liam knew how difficult it was for him to admit he was capable of feeling anything at all, let alone falling in love for someone, and accepting that that someone loved him back. He knew about all the women that had thrown themselves at him only to get close to one of the princes. And he was grateful. Drake had always been there for him and had dropped his life no questions asked to support him when he had needed him the most, he also knew that Drake would give his life for him. They were brothers and Liam would never forget that.

All those reasons had allowed him to forgive Drake and try to move on. Except he hadn’t. Giving her Valtoria and naming her child heir of the kingdom had been both a blessing and a curse. As he had intended, it had allowed him to spend time with her, but also to be a sad witness of how in love with Drake, she was.

After a while, he had tried to get her out of his system by dating numerous women and focusing on Cordonia’s future. He had even been the best man at their wedding. One of the worst days of his life, he didn’t wish on his worst enemy the pain of seeing the love of his life marry his best friend. He had done it, but it hadn’t been enough to forget her or to mend their friendship. Even if they saw each other regularly, they were with Max and Leo, or watching a horse race or a football match. Their conversations never ran very deep, he didn’t want to hear how happy they were together, it was painful enough to see it written on both their faces. At least until recently. Lately, he had noticed that Drake was almost as bitter as he was before her. And Alexis wasn’t happy anymore, her contagious laughter had almost disappeared and the passion he loved so much about her was gone. He wondered if that was the reason Drake wanted to meet him. Had he lost her already and now he came to him for comfort? Could it be…?

Drake parked the car at his usual spot in the Palace and stop the engine. He stayed inside the car a few minutes to collect his thoughts, he didn’t doubt their decision for one second, but he knew it would be a shock to Liam. Again.

He sighed thinking about how much he had hurt Liam in the past years. It hadn’t been their intention, they had even tried to ignore the strong pull they had for each other, but their relationship had seemed unavoidable. From those early days when he had doubted her intentions and tease her incessantly, to the strong friendship they had built during the social season, and the consuming passion that had started with that kiss on the Beaumont’s study, every moment of their relationship had been a step closer to each other. He hadn’t lied to Liam intentionally, Drake had truly believed that Alexis was going to choose the king at the end. So, he decided to keep quiet about her because it would hurt less when she’d finally left him. 

Nonetheless, the truth was that he had hurt Liam so deeply that his friend seemed unable to move on even after all that time. And the last year had been torture for the three of them. Drake knew his best friend was a good, generous man, but he couldn’t help but doubt his intentions behind giving her Valtoria and naming their daughter the heiress.

Finally, he got out of the car and went to meet Liam who was already waiting for him in his office. He was sitting on his desk with a scotch lost on his thoughts.

Drake entered and they greeted each other with a nod of the head, as Drake poured himself a scotch from the bottle next to Liam and took his usual place across the young king.

“Well, here we are, Drake. Why was it so urgent that we meet?” Liam asked in a commanding tone. 

Drake cut to the chase, there was no point in delaying it anymore “We want to leave Valtoria, Liam. We’re not made for the noble’s life. Either of us”

Liam furrowed his brows “Helena cannot be the heir of the kingdom if you are not nobles Drake, you know this”

Drake looked at him knowingly.

The realization hit Liam. “Oh, you don’t want her to be the heiress anymore either,” he said as he leaned back on his chair.

“I’m sorry, we didn’t realize the amount of sacrifice it would be for us, and especially for Lena. She’s barely one and already engaged, Liam!”

“I told you we were going to get out of it, just give me a little more time,” Liam said tiredly.

“It’s not only that. We simply don’t want to be nobles anymore. This can’t be a surprise for you Li, you know that I’ve always hated this stuff. We both do”

“We? You keep talking for the two of you, but I don’t see Alexis anywhere. It looks like it’s you who want to quit, and you are using her as an excuse. You’re only thinking of yourself but she deserves-”

Drake raised his hand interrupting him “What? More than I can give her? The life of a queen? Believe me, I know that,” he gulped his drink. “I also know that for some fucked up reason she doesn’t want any of it. She’s miserable there”

Liam stood up holding his glass. “Maybe that is what you want to think. Maybe she’s quitting to make you happy.”

Drake didn’t take his eyes off of his friend. “That has always been the problem, Li. You don’t know her”

“Thank you for bringing that to my attention, Drake, but I think it was made perfectly clear that I didn’t really know either of you.”

Drake raked his hand through his hair.  “It’s been two years, you have to let it go. Let her go.”

Liam walked towards him “Oh, Drake, I have. That doesn’t mean that I had forgotten what you did to me. She came here for me. Did you forget I was the reason she left New York to come to Cordonia?”

Drake felt the old pang of jealousy at Liam’s words, so he stood up angry as well.

“No, I haven’t, but she fell in love with me while you were engaged to Madeleine. Have you forgotten that? You’re rewriting history, Liam”

They stood a few inches from each other. “You’re right Drake, I made a lot of mistakes concerning her. I shouldn’t have chosen Madeleine at the coronation or let the guards take her, and it was certainly a big mistake to ask her to be my mistress. So, I’ll admit it, when it comes to Alexis I can see where I failed. But you?” He cocked his brow “I’ve only been a brother to you. You deceived me for months, and I’ve never lied to you. You stole my only chance to be happy” He was so angry he barely realized he was shoving Drake.

Drake raised his hands bawling at him “You have never lied to me? Do you really think I don’t know why you gave her that damned duchy seconds after proposing? Do you really think I can’t imagine why the hell you named our daughter, her daughter the heiress?” He pushed Liam back “Don’t say you have never lied to me because you’re fucking doing it right now, Liam. You might be entitled and oblivious but I’m not. You’re still in love with my wife”  

[alynawatchestv]

Alyna watches Xena - 01x01 Sins of the Past

Beware. For the road is long and full of spoilers… I mean, if a 25 years old show can be spoiled. But fair warning.

This thing here was supposed to be short but I made a very long recap of the episode. Sorry not sorry, I’m gonna be making recaps of the series. Yes, every single episode… Not regularly... And it's gonna be long.

Comments and reblogs are appreciated. 👍👍👍

We start with Xena is going through some burned village reminiscing on her past when she was just killing, pillaging and burning villages… And people too, I guess. And then there’s this boy coming out of a burned house asking for food. And when Xena asks him where his parents are, he says Xena killed them. He describes her attack as if the goddess herself showed up and fucked the village up for no reason and Xena is all like:

And it’s really one of the best moments of a pilot, because we’re shown flashback of the attack so even without watching Hercules and meeting Xena there we can see she used to be a bad bitch. So before leaving she gives the kid some bread and cheese so he could hide in his burned house and eat something before he dies of some sickness, gets killed, is eaten by wild animals in search for food etc. Brilliant plan boy, you’re a prodigy.

So then we have the scene where Xena digs a hole and puts her armor her sword and chakram there and frankly, she’s not really a clean lady since there’s still blood and some meat pieces on her chakram.

*rule #1 - wash your weapons from enemies intestines*

And suddenly, a whole bunch of villagers is chased by some warlord taken straight from Mad Max movie. Xena observes the situation, the Mad Max warlord says he’s gonna get the girls (men, smh) and then this blonde girl is all like “take me and leave everyone” and warlords are like “lmfao, nope” and Xena is all like:

*Carless Whisper saxophone solo intensifies*

Because frankly, who wouldn’t be? I know I had the same reaction to Gabrielle so I get Xena. I totally get it.

So when the warlord wants to whip Gabrielle for being insubordinate Xena suddenly jumps into action and starts kicking ass. We get backflips, kicks, punches and a really awesome action sequence until Xena is hit in the head (because she was watching if Gabrielle was safe and it got her distracted. Again, totally understandable).

Men are standing there groaning “argh, grr, rghhg” or something like that and then BOOM! Xena takes out her sword from the hole and with a laugh starts fighting them. And you can see how much fun she has. She kicks warlords’ asses and realizes they’re from Draco so she tell them to say hello from Xena. But who’s Draco? What does he do? Is he more evil then Xena? We don’t know! And… opening!

In a time of ancient gods, warlords… Well, you know it.

So later on Xena is in this small village surrounded by the villagers and Gabrielle is fawning over her and the whole situation, and Gabrielle’s father comes in being all like “thanks for saving us, but now GTFO” and this tall dude behind him wants to take Gabrielle. But Gabrielle is all like “dude, I know I’m supposed to marry you against my will and then die in childbirth or of boredom, but I’m not gonna listen to you. GTFO”. So when he leaves, Gabrielle begs Xena to take her with her. Xena being stoic and supposedly unmoved by Gabrielle words of course disagrees, because “she works alone” and… Then she tells Gabrielle she’s going to Amphipolis, because OF COURSE Gabrielle wouldn’t try and follow her. Nope. Not at all. And she goes like “don’t follow me, you don’t wanna make me mad, do you?” and of course Gabrielle is all like “yeah, no sure, I get it” but then is of course “meh, she’s not that scary. I just need a plan!”

So we move to Draco’s camp where he’s without shirt exposing his bare chest, being all handsome and shit, and being badass when catching almost four arrows at once. But then he’s sort of colorblind… I mean he notices the color of the arrow that wounded him but can’t see who has green arrows when the dude’s arrows are visible from behind his back...

*seriously Draco…*

Anyway, later he’s alone and Xena sneaks in and they have the whole who's tougher bitch, which is Xena of course, and she asks him to leave the village alone (because of her future wife or something) and Draco’s all like “yeah, sure… If you join me” and when Xena says she can’t join Draco, being a typical man he asks why. And we get this really awesome scene where Xena dramatically turns her back, stares at nothing and says she’s going home. OH, DRAMA!

So Draco becomes even a bigger drama queen than Xena and tells our warrior saying he’s dreamt of being in love with her or… fighting in battle or whatever, can’t remember, but Xena turns and Draco goes all soft and says he’ll spare those villagers. But he also asks Xena what's she looking for at home. Being still in drama mode he tells her that when he tried to come home his dad beat the shit out of him with a blacksmith’s hammer. And he survived that. Damn, he IS badass! I mean, have you people ever seen a blacksmith hammer?!

*9/10 parents wouldn't recommend this as an educational tool*

Meanwhile, Gabrielle wants to escape home in the middle of the night and while sneaking out she… Hits strategically placed table waking up her sister Lila. Gabrielle explains to her she needs to follow Xena because she’s in lo… She wants to be a warrior like her and that she doesn’t love Perdicus and it’s her destiny. So Lila being a supportive sister is all like “Go, chase your girlf…. Dreams! Just do it!” and Gabrielle leaves.

*Lila being a supportive sister*

It’s daylight and Xena is riding Argo when suddenly her horse stops all afraid. So Xena gets off the horse that suddenly runs away and… The Blind Cyclops shows up with Draco’s dad’s blacksmith’s hammer! (I honestly don’t know if I used Saxon Genitive in the right way, but I hope you get the meaning). Xena is all like “Fuuuck, that’s a big hammer!” which makes the Blind Cyclops even more badass than he already is, but she stands to fight and humiliates him by dropping his pants. He starts bawling like a baby and Xena leaves him and continues her journey to Amphipolis, because she has no time to deal with Cyclops drama.

But Draco is plotting against Xena. He decides to attack Amphipolis and pretend it was Xena who told him to do it. Plot thickens, you guys.

Gabrielle is afraid of bridges… And gets caught by…Yes, you guessed right. The Blind Cyclops. But being a smart girl she says she’s out here to find and kill Xena because… And here we have very subtexty dialogue:

C: “How’s the young thing like you is gonna kill Xena?”

G: “That’s the point. She’d never let a man get close enough to do her. At least not that kind of do her. But a young, innocent looking girl like me, I’ll catch her totally off guard…

*You sure will, Gabrielle. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)*

At the same time, Xena is being followed by Draco’s warlords. They’re dumb enough to think she doesn’t know so she goes all ninja on them, fingers the Mad Max warlord… I mean, she cuts the blood to his body… Pervs. ;) And when she learns about the plan she leaves to stop the invasion.

In the next scene, Gabrielle is chilling out on the road when some old dude stops and tells her to GTFO, because she’s blocking the only route to Amphipolis. So Gabrielle convinces him to take her with him and the old dude agrees.

So while Gabrielle and the old man are traveling on the only route to Amphipolis, Xena is taking a detour through the hills for dramatic effect or something. Basically, New Zealand… I mean Greece is a beautiful place so why not show it, right? Right?

She meets those peasant women singing Bulgarian…  I mean Greek chants and rides through them, but they don’t give a shit being too into chanting and putting on stacks of… Hay, I guess. Meh, whatever.

So Xena reaches Amhipolis and goes into a tavern to drink wine and sleep with beautiful women. But unfortunately it’s not that kind of a tavern and there’s no wine and beautiful women to sleep with. All she meets are angry people, silence and… wait for it… her mother, Cyrene!

Cyrene grabs Xena’s sword and tells her she’s not welcomed there and she should GTFO. Xena wants to rally people against Draco but Cyrene is against and she tells Xena she’d rather die and that she’s not her mother. And it’s a rather powerful stuff, because we only know glimpses of Xena’s past so we don’t really know how big her crimes are. Of course burning one village and killing peasants is a big no no, but Xena is too big of a character to be hated for such a minor offense. Anyway, villagers in the tavern also tell Xena to GTFO so she does.

Draco is pissed that Mad Max warlord told Xena about his plans and tells him to pick a weapon. Sadly it’s not Draco’s father’s blacksmith’s hammer because that’s been stolen by the Blind Cyclops, but a simple spear. Still, Draco proves to be truly awesome by kicking Mad Max warlord’s ass and killing him while telling new plans to his people. Truly, he was a great choice for a pilot.

In the morning, Xena comes back to the tavern looking around hoping to find some wine and beautiful ladies to sleep with, but to her disappointment there are still none. But her sword is there. And her mom is there. Oh boy, this tension between them could cut diamonds in half. But we get a bonding moment where Cyrene and Xena open old wounds so they could heal, and Xena tells her mother she might not be able to set things right, but she’s gonna spend the rest of her life to try. It’s another great moment in this show where we see Xena in her vulnerable state and not all powerful and strong. And this moment is ruined by villagers coming into the tavern saying Xena’s army is burning fields to which Xena answers they’re lying, Cyrene feels all hurt thinking it was all a ruse and leaves, and villagers start throwing rocks at our warrior princess.

But then Gabrielle comes to the rescue! Because Gabrielle has a natural talent to talk her way out of troubles, she uses it to save Xena. She uses a cunning bluff of “if you hurt bad guy’s girlfriend imagine how pissed he’ll be”. So the villagers reluctantly agree and decide to not commit murder. After a small talk Xena takes Gabrielle on her horse and takes her to her dead brother. Because, you know, there’s no better start of a romance than a visit at the crypt.

So Xena is talking to his dead brother saying she’s lost but that she’s gonna be ok, but that she’s alone and then Gabrielle shows up saying she’s not. And by the way that they’re looking at each other we’re to believe these two weren’t into each other from the beginning? Please.

*They’ve known each other for like 1 hour and we get those looks already? So straight indeed*

Meanwhile, the villagers are waiting for Draco to make a deal, but when he shows up he’s threatening to destroy everything and kill everyone unless they tell him where Xena is. And this is another great moment for Draco, because he really is a scary and ruthless dude and I really wish he was more in this show then just 3 episodes. It was a wasted character, imo.

Anyway, while threatening the leader to kill him, Xena shows up and Draco makes fun of her asking about the homecoming. Again, he tries to convince Xena to join him and goes all Palpatine saying she should “celebrate her dark side”, but Xena is all like “pfft, fuck off and let’s fight to the death”. Draco tells her to choose weapons, but Xena leaves the choice to Draco. Now, Draco being a really smart guy and someone who knows how good Xena is with swords, chooses staffs. I’m sure he believes it’ll give him advantage or at least even oit the odds. Xena chooses the conditions and her conditions are to fight on a scaffolding. The first person to touch the ground is gonna die. Draco agrees and tells his people that whoever falls first is to be killed.

Doing a flip with the help of his people he gets to a scaffolding and grabs his staff. Xena is way more of a showgirl. She hits the dude with his staff and when he leans down she jumps on his back and then on a head of another warlord and jumps to meet her opponent.

They start fighting. It’s an even fight and Draco proves to be a worthy opponent. Soon Xena has to fight to stay on the bamboo scaffolding as it starts to fall off. The archers prepare to shoot, Cyrene shows up and everyone is thinking if she’s gonna fall. But no, Xena standing on one bamboo stick starts hitting bamboos under Draco’s feet to make him back out and leave him vulnerable. But Draco stands tough and very soon he manages to make Xena almost fall again. She manages to hang on her staff, her legs barely touching the ground. Cyrene starts panicking, being all teary, because, come on, she’s a mom. No matter how pissed our moms are at us, they worry 24/7.

Draco starts hiting Xena’s hands wanting her to let go and fall, asking her why she would die for the people that hate her. But Xena grabs Draco’s staff with her feet and doing a truly awesome backflip she manages to stand on the scaffolding again attacking him. Draco almost falls but jumps on people’s heads and give Xena a signal to join him.

And the same villagers who earlier denied Xena her wine and beautiful women to sleep with, and wanted her dead are now supporting her… Literally. She manages to stand on the arms of one person and attacks Draco. They do backflips, kicks, punches and all that for a few minutes and then with one swift kick to the chest Draco falls down on the ground and Xena jumps on his chest looking down upon him to let him know he’s just a little bitch and not a match to her skills. Xena promises to spare Draco if he leaves the valley and he agrees.

But one of his warlords decides to sneakily attack Xena from behind. Gabrielle’s warns her, but before the warrior can react Draco throws his knife at him. After all, Draco may be a ruthless warlord, but he’s honorable.

After the fight Xena is preparing to leave when Cyrene shows up and hugs Xena, who asks again for forgiveness and is, of course, given that. It's a truly awesome moment in this pilot.

But, and honestly I have no idea why, Xena doesn’t stay in the tavern for wine and beautiful women to sleep with. Maybe there is no wine and beautiful women to sleep with after all. Instead, Xena starts a fire near some woods when she hears some noise and goes into a warrior mode. But, as it turns out, it’s just Gabrielle saying she wanted to follow Xena without her noticing, but she couldn’t start a fire and it’s cold and there are mosquitoes looking lkke eagles or something.

Xena wants to send her back home, but Gabrielle says she won’t go. There’s a talk about not belonging there and Xena seems to understand Gabrielle completely. So when she gives Gabrielle a blanket we get one of the most beautiful moments in the pilot.

*couldn't find gif so you're stuck with bad screenshot*

And in the morning we see Xena and Gabrielle travelling to new adventures to right wrongs, drink wine and… Oh forget it.

This episode is all kinds of awesomeness. It’s a great introduction to a character of Xena even to those, like me, who didn’t know her from Hercules. It has tons of very well choreographed fights, amazing music and it’s a rreally strong pilot that makes you wanna see more.

10/10

Edit: I got the gif. Thanks @girl4music​ :)

*there’s nothing gay here. nada. zero... mhm...*

[pug-bitch]

That’s not why I’m staying (8)

The world at your feet

Book: The Royal Romance, Book 2

Pairing: Drake Walker x Amara Suarez

Rating: some foul language, some extremely suggestive, and an inappropriate conversation in the first scene :D. This is absolutely NOT appropriate for people under 18.

Word count: about 3,500

Notes: This picks up pretty much where we left off, during Michael’s last night at the cabin, starting with Drake’s POV.

*****

Drake comes out of Sav’s old bedroom, his arms full of party games. She had always loved entertaining the young ladies of court at the cabin, however mean they were to her. Sav never lost hope that she would, one day, fit in. Only Maxwell was loyal to her. Drake shakes the idea off. Soon, he thinks, he can reconnect and, hopefully, make amends for not being there enough.

‘Table topics!!’ Maxwell exclaims.

Drake smiles. ‘Yup. Remember?’

Liv sighs as she pours herself another glass of wine. ‘As if you needed inspiration on weird topics, Beaumont!’

Maxwell laughs. ‘You may be right but it’s a fun game! Come on guys, grab some more dessert and let’s GO!’

Drake steals a kiss from Amara on his way to grab another slice of the apricot cake she and Hana made. Dinner was a success and they were now on to the second part of the mini Bash, with games, music, and booze.

Not that the whole evening wasn’t filled with booze. Drake can barely stand without swaying around like he’s on a boat. Weird how treacherous margaritas are.

‘You ok babe?’ Amara asks, her words slightly slurred.

Drake puts his hand on her hip and brings her closer. ‘Better than ever.’ He gives her another kiss, deeper this time. ‘Well, maybe I’m drunk.’

Amara giggles. ‘Yeah, so am I.’

‘Guys, gather around!’ Maxwell yells out as he stumbles down on a cushion. ‘Bertrand, get some more wine, you filthy animal!’

‘Okay, okay,’ Bertrand concedes. ‘It IS delicious wine, Olivia. Thank you for bringing it.’

Olivia bows. ‘Of course. Anything to get you drunk, Beaumont.’

Bertrand blushes. ‘Oh well. It doesn’t take much,’ he chuckles.

They all gather around the coffee table, and Hana draws the first card. She immediately giggles. ‘Oh, that one’s intense!’ She clears her throat. ‘Describe the worst sex you’ve ever had.’

‘Wow,’ Drake chuckles. ‘Not pulling any punches, huh?’

Maxwell raises his almost empty glass. ‘I’ll start! It was my first time. It was horrible. I got confused, and I forgot how close I was to the edge of the bed. I fell down and hurt my chin on my belt buckle. I had a bruise for days!’

Bertrand shudders. ‘Good lord, Maxwell, that’s where that bruise was coming from? I’d rather not know!’ He downs his entire glass of wine at once, which Olivia quickly refills, an evil smirk on her face.

She asks, ‘So, I take it you want to pass your turn, Beaumont?’

Bertrand grimaces. ‘If it’s alright, yes.’

Olivia shrugs. ‘Yeah, it’s your one pass. I’ll go next. My worst fuck was this guy I met at the derby 2 years ago. The Croatian, remember, Walker?’

Drake frowns. ‘Oh yeah. He worked for the Ambassador?’

Liv nods. ‘Well, he didn’t work for me. He cried as he orgasmed and said ‘I love you’ through his tears.’ She takes a sip of her wine. ‘Weak bastard.’

Amara makes a disgusted face. ‘Yikes. Um, my turn, I guess. The worst sex I’ve ever had is when I studied abroad in Québec, and this hot guy I met at a party turned out to have a lot of trouble getting a boner. He may have been drunk, but it was still very pathetic and sad for me.’

Drake strokes Amara’s hair and says ‘What a loser, who wouldn’t have a boner for you?’

Michael snorts, ‘Um, brother in the room, thank you very much. I’m with you on that one, Bertrand, I think I’ll pass.’ He downs his margarita. ‘Im traumatized.’

Drake’s eyes widen. ‘Did I say that out loud?’

Amara nods. ‘Yes. And thank you.’

Maxwell wipes a tear from laughter. ‘You guys, this is so much fun! Drake, your turn, then you draw!’

Drake nods seriously, as he tries to focus his eyes on a static point. ‘Um, for me, it was that Italian woman I had met, and she kept calling me Daddy, and trying to get me to spank her. Which, coupled with the ‘Daddy’ thing, well…’ he laughs. ‘It’s pretty fucked up.’

Maxwell shrugs. ‘At least you don’t lose your boners like Amara’s Canadian. Ha!’

Michael shakes his head. ‘Too soon, Maxwell. Too soon.’

Drake laughs and draws a card. ‘Alright, here we go. What’s your biggest regret?’

Olivia snorts. ‘Deep. Alright, I’ll go. My biggest regret is to have been hung up on Liam for too long.’

They all cheer. ‘Amen, sister,’ Amara yells. ‘For me, I don’t want to spoil the mood, so I’ll just say that I regret not talking to Michael for so long.’ She holds out her hand, which Michael lovingly takes. ‘Also to have spoken about the Canadian’s soft penis in front of him.’

Michael takes his hand back abruptly and bursts out laughing. ‘You little bitch,’ he giggles. ‘Alright, same for me—to have withdrawn from people who love me, such as my lovely sister here, and also I regret my skater phase in high school.’

Maxwell’s eyes widen. ‘You were a sk8er boi??’ He gasps as Michael nods cheekily. ‘Michael, my biggest regret is not to have seen any pictures of little skater you...yet!’

Hana raises her hand, all giggly from too many margaritas. ‘My biggest regret is not coming out to my parents.’

‘Yet!’ Michael adds, as he squeezes Hana’s arm gently.

Hana smiles. ‘You’re right! I will do it one day. Soon.’

Amara nods enthusiastically. ‘Yes you will! You’re a strong woman who knows who she is, and if they can’t see that, well… they better take time to reflect upon themselves.’ She frowns decidedly.

Drake chuckles. ‘Yeah, babe, that wasn’t harsh enough. What Amara means is… if they can’t accept you for who you are, fuck them, Hana!’

‘Yeah!’ Hana chimes in, as she frowns adorably. ‘Ok, your turn, Bertrand!’

Bertrand sighs heavily, his eyes glued to the Walker family portrait on the wall. ‘Oh guys,’ he says longingly, ‘I have so many regrets. The one I can’t stop thinking of is—‘ Olivia sneakily refills his wine glass as Amara shoots her daggers— ‘thank you, Olivia,’ he adds, ‘what I can’t seem to stop thinking of, every day almost… is not telling Savannah how I felt. Letting her go, without a proper declaration of love.’ He sighs and takes a big gulp of his wine.

Drake feels as though he sobered up at least 3 drinks. He and Maxwell make eye contact, and he notices that Max looks equally sad. ‘Hey man,’ Drake says comfortingly, ‘it’s not too late. It’s never too late to tell someone how you feel.’

Maxwell nods and puts a reassuring hand on his brother’s arm. ‘Yeah, he’s right, you never know what the future holds.’

Bertrand shakes his head. ‘I don’t know, guys. She has been gone two years. I don’t think I’ll ever see her again.’

A silence weighs on the room. Drake looks at Amara, who is biting her lip and looks like she’s about to say something. Drake tries to shake his head at her discreetly, but she takes a big breath and blurts out, ‘I found her.’

*****

Amara can’t believe she said this. She certainly didn’t plan on it. Can she blame the margaritas, if she’s the one who made the margaritas? She’s gonna go with yes.

All eyes are on her, especially Drake’s, who are pleading her to stop talking. But she has to fix this, right?

She looks at Bertrand, who looks utterly destroyed by the news. She opens her mouth again. ‘I know how sad Drake has been because of his sister’s disappearance, and I wanted to make sure she was ok. We had very little leads, just an email address she had given her mom, and a bank account—‘ she stops in her tracks. She can’t betray Maxwell. She takes another deep breath. ‘That she had also given Bianca, and I found her. We’re gonna try to establish contact.’

Amara feels Drake relaxing next to her. She looks into his eyes, and he gives her a relieved smile. Phew, she thinks. She didn’t blow it all.

Bertrand gasps for air. ‘Oh wow. That is very impressive of you, Amara. You must be a wonderful detective. Um, Olivia, can I have some more wine?’

Olivia hurries to the bottle and empties it in Bertrand’s glass. ‘Of course,’ she says, in shock.

Bertrand takes a gulp and says, ‘Thank you for telling me. I hope that, when you do find her in person, she agrees to talk to me.’ He pauses. ‘In fact—no.’

‘No no, go ahead,’ Drake says.

Bertrand sighs. ‘Do you think you could give me that email address you were speaking of?’

Drake pauses for a second, looks at both Amara and Maxwell, and finally says, ‘Of course. I’ll give it to you tomorrow.’

Bertrand nods, determined. ‘Thank you. I have something in my drafts that is aching to be sent.’

*****

Table Topics died down with that second card—way too loaded, but also necessary, as Drake is starting to think. ‘Hey guys, let’s finish those chocolates, ok?’ He yells out on his way to the kitchen to refill his cocktail.

As he pours himself another delicious margarita, he feels Amara’s hand squeezing his arm. She makes her way into his arms and pulls him closer. ‘Oh my God I’m sorry, babe,’ she whispers, her eyes digging deep into his. ‘I have no idea why I blurted it out. I shouldn’t have.’ She bites her lip.

Drake’s heart melts. ‘I know why you did.’ He strokes her face gently. ‘Bertrand looked miserable and we have been withholding crucial info from him.’ He smiles as he cups her face. ‘I’m glad you told him. I’m also glad you kept quiet about the—‘ his voice grows quieter— ‘the baby. We want to talk to Sav before involving him.’

Amara lets out a sigh of relief. ‘I was so scared you’d be mad at me. I promise you it just came out….the poor schmuck was laying his heart on the table, like ‘she’s my biggest regret and now she’s gone forever,’ when we all know she’s not, and—‘

Drake squeezes her hand. ‘I know. My heart broke for him, too. Believe me, I get it.’ He hands Amara the margarita pitcher. ‘Here, have another drink. This sobered us up way too quickly.’

She chuckles and obliges. ‘You got that right.’

Drake smiles softly as he looks at Amara try not to spill her margarita. He would never think that love would soften him this much. When he looks at her, his heart turns into a gooey substance that alters all his senses and decisions. It’s frightening, yes. But it brought so much joy into his life, too.

‘What?’ Amara asks, amused.

He shrugs. ‘Nothing. Just thinking. If Bertrand really does email Sav, maybe it will convince her to come back. More than I ever could.’

*****

Liam pours himself another vodka. He’s never been one for hard liquor—much more of a white wine drinker—, but desperate times call for desperate measures. After spending the afternoon drafting a treaty with Greece, he had to go have dinner with his father, who had been in worse shape than ever. Liam shudders as he thinks back on his father’s weak movements, and slower speech.

He knows that Constantine is not one to admit weakness. He’s the King, after all. But if there ever was a time…

He shakes it off. He’ll think about all this after the Engagement Tour. Constantine is surrounded with the best doctors in Europe, there is no reason to worry as of yet. Right?

Liam found the perfect excuse to escape from Madeleine tonight. He has to work late on that treaty, and needs to get up early. So, unfortunately, no sleepover, darling, you will be better off in your own room. Madeleine had pouted and acted like she was disappointed, but he could tell that even she was relieved that tonight was providing her with an out. An out from this forced charade they called an engagement. Maybe, just maybe, if he could just convince her from sheer boredom and lack of chemistry, to just...let go, maybe everything could go back to normal.

But he’ll have to take the crown soon. There’s no out for that.

He sighs and downs his vodka. He pours another. In front of him, the business card he was handed a few weeks back. Should he…?

No. It’s almost eleven. It wouldn’t be proper.

She did say that he could write whenever… He takes a deep breath and starts typing furiously on his phone.

This is Liam. May I take you up on your offer?

He puts the phone down, and grabs his glass again. As soon as he takes a sip, his phone vibrates.

Of course. Is everything ok?

He lets out a sigh of relief as he starts typing again.

Just a hard night. Hope all is well with you. Would you be free for a drink? Unless it’s too late.

His heart races. It’s been a while since he’s made a new friend. Someone who really listens to him, and whose presence calms him down.

Sure. I just need to finish a brief. How about the Orchard Way Tavern in half an hour?

Liam types a quick response and speed dials Bastien. ‘Bastien, are you available to drive me downtown?’

‘Sure thing, Your Majesty, but I can call Thierry—‘

‘No need. Please pick me up in 15.’

*****

You were workin' as a waitress in a cocktail bar

When I met you

I picked you out, I shook you up and turned you around

Turned you into someone new

Now five years later on, you've got the world at your feet

Success has been so easy for you

But don't forget, it's me who put you where you are now

And I can put you back down too

Don’t—Don’t you want me

Drake drunkenly looks on as Maxwell and Amara duet on Don’t You Want Me. They’re having the time of their lives, who needs a karaoke machine when you can just sing as loudly as you can over the actual singers?

Michael comes to sit next to him on the floor, and smiles at him. ‘This is awesome, Drake,’ he slurs. ‘I’m having such a good time. Thank you.’

Drake smiles back and clinks his drink to Michael’s. ‘You’re welcome. It’s a pleasure to have you here, Mike.’

Michael grows pensive, and Drake appreciate how much of a quiet drunk he is, compared to the others. ‘You know, I’m gonna have a hard time leaving tomorrow.’

Drake nods. ‘I don’t blame you. Wish you could stay longer and come on the tour. I would appreciate the company, and so would these two,’ he gestures at Maxwell and Amara.

Michael chuckles. ‘Yeah. Well, maybe it’ll be good for everyone to…’ he makes a calming gesture with his arms, ‘take some time. You know.’ He sighs. ‘Dammit. Is it that obvious?’

Drake shrugs, amused. ‘I didn’t say anything, man.’

Michael shakes his head. ‘You didn’t need to.’ He takes a sip of his wine. ‘I just don’t know what happened to me in the past few days. I feel… different. Calmer. More serene.’

Drake nods. ‘Yeah. Like you’ve made peace with some shit, right?’

Michael nudges Drake with his elbow. ‘Exactly. That’s exactly right. I’ve made peace with some shit. Some really deep shit.’ He chuckles. ‘Look at her.’

Drake looks at Amara. ‘Oh, I am. She’s a sight to behold.’

Michael nudges him again. ‘You love her. I love that. She’s so loveable, man, it’s unreal.’ He pauses. ‘You know, when I look at my kid, who’s the spitting image of Sergio, it doesn’t hurt. I love it, because he lives on. But for a long time, when I looked at Amara, it did hurt. A lot. Because not only is she basically the female version of her brother, but these two were so close. So fucking close.’ He shakes his head. ‘They were like twins, if twins could be six years apart, you know. This one over there, she’s an old soul. When I met her, she was a little eighteen-year-old, but she didn’t take shit from anybody, and she was already introspective, and observant, and good with people—all of it.’

Drake smiles. ‘That’s my Amara.’

Michael holds his hand to his heart. ‘Ugh, stop it, you guys are so cute.’ He takes another sip. ‘My point is, she’s such a complex and precious little soul. Always has been. And Sergio always told me how strong she is, but also, sensitive at the same time, because she loves so wholly, you know. She gives her all. Well, when we lost him—when this all happened, two years ago, and she withdrew into her own shell, it hurt so fucking much, because I knew, I just knew that it would have killed him even more, to see her like that.’ He pauses and bites his lip. ‘Nope,’ he adds, ‘I’m not gonna fucking cry on my last night.’

Drake puts his hand on Michael’s knee and gives it a reassuring squeeze. ‘It’s ok, man. I get it. She is getting better, now, and you can let go a little bit.’ He smiles. ‘She will be ok.’

Michael nods. ‘Because of you. Because of you, and Max, and Hana, and Olivia, and Bertrand… because she found people to love again.’

Drake has to make a conscious effort in order not to tear up as well. ‘Mike, I’m glad you’re here. And please tell me we can see you in New York when we go there after the bullshit Ball we have to attend.’

Michael nods furiously. ‘I’d love nothing more.’

*****

Liam fidgets with his glass of water as he waits. She insisted on getting the second round, not that he needed to drink more, but when the company is this nice, what can you say.

‘Here you go,’ she says as she puts his glass of wine in front of him. ‘Cheers!’

He clinks his glass to her martini. ‘Thank you, Ioanna, and cheers to you.’

‘So,’ she says as she sets her glass safely on the table. ‘You were saying that you’re totally into Amara Suarez, even though she has never given you any indication that she likes you romantically?’

Liam arches an eyebrow. ‘Did—did I say that?’

Ioanna chuckles. ‘Not in so many words, but that’s what I understood.’

He holds his hand to his chest, feigning being shot in the heart. ‘Ouch, that was harsh, Ms. Papadakis!’

She shrugs playfully, as she tugs a brown curl behind her ear. ‘Hey, you said you like honesty. I’m just trying to have your back.’

Liam takes a sip. ‘You have a point. Come to think of it, I may never have known what honesty is.’ He pauses. ‘You know everyone wants to kiss the prince’s ass.’

Ioanna snorts. ‘Classy, Your Majesty.’

He laughs. ‘You know what I mean. The only person who’s ever been honest with me—I think—is my best friend. And maybe Amara, well, I hope.’

Ioanna drinks quietly.

Liam smiles, ‘And, clearly, now, you.’

She nods, pleased with his response. ‘Well, you said it yourself. She was honest with you, she told you she doesn’t want anything romantic with you. Why do you choose not to believe her?’

He pauses, taken aback. ‘Um. Maybe because she barely knows me, and I’m still hoping that—‘

‘Forgive me for being straightforward,’ she interrupts, ‘but maybe it could be because you’ve always gotten what you want?’

He opens his mouth to protest. Gotten what he wants? Really? As he is forced to take the crown, as his father is dying, as his mother is dead and buried? He closes his mouth.

‘Liam,’ she adds, ‘I’m not saying you’ve never been through anything. I’m not. But you said it yourself, everyone is kissing your ass, so maybe you can’t recognize it when people are actually...not?’

Damn, he thinks, is she reading his mind? ‘Well, you got me there,’ he says, defeated.

Ioanna shrugs in victory as she takes another sip of her martini. ‘And don’t get me started on your plan to unveil your fiancée’s evil nature during the Engagement Tour,’ she adds. ‘This plan has more holes than gruyère cheese. With all due respect, everyone knows she’s not a very good person, and no one cares.’ Her eyes dig into his, deeply. ‘The only person who can break your engagement is you.’

*****

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[suffering-and-happy-about-it]

Stories, Tales & Facts (Part 1.) (Sriracha, Part 36.)

Series description: A problematic college student gets the worst summer job of the ‘83 - Jim Hopper, the Chief of police in your hometown will have you as his secretary since his old lady Flo has two months lasting holiday. It was agreed so Hopper could let you far away from all the trouble.

Part Summary: Hopper was about to speak up about his past - from where his trouble had started to where it ended just before few weeks. But you didn‘t know how much shit he was through.

A/N: Let‘s face it. This chapter contains huge spoilers for Hopper‘s which is completely named in novel Darkness on the Edge of Town. So it should be at least partially cannonical.

Word count: 3.8 K

Tagging:  @nemodoren​, @creedslove​, @missdictatorme, @ysljordy​

Master list: H E R E

The next morning, you had woken up pretty early in the morning. At least, you fell asleep - Hopper was awake the whole time, just staring into the ceiling before he got out of the bed to eat something, make you a coffee and breakfast. Which made you smile a bit. He was still as thoughtful as he was before.

But you didn‘t even let him take a short breath before you asked the first question of the day.

“So, you said there‘s a lot.” - You mumbled and gave him a look as you sat down, gently pulling a bit away from him. - “That means you have to start from the beginning. Every tale has a beginning, the middle, and an end. Do you understand that friends don‘t lie?” - You asked Eleven‘s most favorite sentence. This sentence was bugging Jim off a lot back in the day. When you told him the sentence, you made him feel a bit better. It was a thing so known and nice.

“If you want to start from the beginnin‘ of my trouble, we will go way down back to the sixties.” -  Hopper told you honestly. At that, you chuckled.

“Jim, I already know that you were in Vietnam. That isn‘t anything new.” - You told him ironically. At that, he looked into your face.

“You know that I was there once. Wrong. I was there twice. The first time, it was in ‘62.” - Jim told you straight in your face. At that, your breath hitched in your throat. He was... Eighteen. He was fucking eighteen when he first was transported to that hell. - “And for your information, I went there voluntarily. Nobody asked me to go.”

You were looking him into the eyes. The questions in your eyes were completely vivid. Your lips were just opening and closing as you tried to tell him something back, but nothing hit your tongue.

“You don‘t understand how was it like in here back in the sixties. I didn‘t know what to do here, I was kinda... Lost. You‘re a psychologist, you should know what I was feelin‘. I wanted to feel like I‘m useful, not like I‘m just spendin‘ my life in the biggest asshole in the USA.”

“Then I went back for turnus number two in ‘68. After that, I met Diane. And believe or not, I was really happy with her. Not too long ago, in ‘71, Sara was born. And we left for New York, but you already know what I‘ve been doin‘ in there.” - He said without explaining to you any further.

Yeah, you‘ve heard that story already. How he was the big detective in Brooklyn‘s sixty-fifth district and how he went after something he called the card-murders, He almost killed a man back then. After that, Sara had died and Diane left him. Except for the Vietnam news, you hadn‘t known about any of that, you knew about everything. But the biggest shockers were just coming your way.

“I was hurt. Hurt. And then you came by and for a small while, everything seemed to be right. I felt good about myself for a time. That was when Will Byers disappeared." - Hopper took a deep breath, giving you a look. - "Promise me that no matter how crazy everythin' seems to be, you'll believe me. I won't ever make up anythin' like this. You promise?"

That was when you got quiet again, only drinking coffee while eating the mashed eggs he had prepared you. - "Friends don't lie. Tell me and we'll see how crazy this seems to be."

So Hopper did as you wished and told you about the November of '83. About Eleven, Papa, and the Lab. He didn't leave out a single detail. Jim didn't leave out any gore, he told you all about what Eleven can do, which was the first thing you weren't able to come around.

"Jim, she's a normal kid. I had raised my daughter for more than just a week. If there would be any red flags, believe me, I would notice." - You said a bit more aggressively than you anticipated. But you were sure that Jim is just fucking around with.

“You remember that one time we had a fight in the cabin and I fell flat on my ass? You thought I just lost balance.” - He told you rather seriously and you uncomfortably shifted into a different position. How would you be able to forget that argument? You were yelling, screaming, crying that night until Eleven came out of her room. - “Blood was drippin' out of her nose, which made you worried, remember?” - Jim whispered and you needed to look away for a second. You haven't noticed a single weird thing about your baby, she was just a normal, twelve-year-old girl when you met. But it all checked in, according to what Jim had told you.

After that, Jim proceeded to another part of the story - explaining why Will was getting worse and worse (that was because of a thing called the Mind Flayer), which you had noticed, what happened with the veins under Hawkins, the Demodogs, what Steve Harrington did which resulted in him and children being best friends, which you also knew. In detail, Jim described what happened underneath the Lab and that Eleven went to see Terry Ives, her biological mother. In the middle of the story, you had to take a short break to think about everything and to have another cup of coffee.

You started crying when you finally got to know what even happened to Joyce's Bob. You didn't believe a thing Jim said, it was so surreal, but you finally got an explanation. It didn't mean that the explanation would make you satisfied, but it was a piece of information with which you could fill the blanks you had in your head. He was eaten by some fucking Demogorgons, whatever that thing was. You had an idea of how did the monster look - once, you played D&D with the kids and something like that was in the game.

And when the Russians came to play, you couldn't understand anything anymore. You were just sitting there, listening to Hopper talking about Starcourt mall being invested with Russians living in an underground base. At the same time, the Mind Flayer got Billy Hargrove, that son of a snake who was Max's brother. It was literally - Mind Flayer got him. Because of the beast, the boy was dead. Jim didn't know that Billy was dead, but then you told him with a terrified expression.

When Jim finished Billy's part of the story, he proceeded to tell you what happened to him. The events happened to both you had met at one point - the moment when Eleven got out of the mall. Each one of you was there - you were hugging El in front of the mall while Jim and Joyce were trying to blow up the massive generator under Starcourt. That was the moment he had presumably died. That was something which Dr. Owens had come up with since they didn't find a single clue that Hopper had died in the generator room. For Hopper to have some time to catch some breath, Owens had decided to pronounce Hopper dead for the time they were searching for him - he found himself being in Russia, working in a gulag. He told you about how he had got out and contented Owens again, Sam helping him back into Indiana so Hopper could start a search for you once again. And because he was in such mental and physical state when he came back, he was taking Tuinal again.

You were back to the square one. Hopper was taking drugs, he was a stranger and on top of that, he was lying to you for almost three years in a row, which was quite impressive. You were slowly getting fed up and mad when you realized that three years, basically thirty-six months, every time something unnatural happened, every time some monster appeared, he figured out some lie to tell you. He was wrapping you in a silver lining after silver lining, again and again. Which had blown you away.

It was almost midday when he had finished - you were preparing some lunch so Hopper would have to eat something. You were just cooking some meat with vegetables, while Hopper let you get your mind sorted.

"I think that the drugs made something to your brain, Jim." - You snorted all of a sudden. It was one of your typical, ironical snorts. You put the potatoes into the oven, put your elbows over your chest, and looked at him. - "Because a single word of what you've said... These are all illusions and hallucinations. If you plotted all of this the six months you were God knows where it's really impressive. Hands down to you, my dude, you got me in the first half."

Jim looked at you. You weren't even crying. But... You cried when he told you what happened to Bob, you believed him, right? If you wouldn't believe him, why would you cry?

"And bringing almost everyone into that, the kids, Joyce, Steve, Bob, Powell, and Callahan... Dear Lord, you even put it onto a precise timeline. You are sitting here, in front of me, looking me dead in the eyes, telling me... All of this, expecting me to believe. Oh, God, James Hopper. You have disappointed me." - You put your palms on your hips, turning away from him with a burst of unbelieving laughter.

"You don't believe me? Fine, let's visit Mike and ask him. Ask Harrington about it. Even that Henderson boy would tell you that this is the truth. Not enough? Fine, Imma take you to the Lab. I will show you everything. Imma ask Nancy Wheeler to give me the photos of Demogorgon." - Hopper stood up in front of you, having his faces just inches from yours. His face was deadly serious and for a second, you thought about if you had poked some sensitive spot or what did you even do. You thought he went mental in the last six months.

"I hadn't told you because the government would be after you and if somethin' happened to you or her... I mean... Anythin'... How would someone like me even come across losing his loved ones? Once again?" - He took your shoulder to his palms, making you look into his eyes.

"In New York, a special agent of a secret state organization named Gallup showed me, how easy is for someone to disappear in a manner of an afternoon. And I'm sure that he would make Diane and Sara disappear the same, just as he told me he would in case I wouldn't want to cooperate with them in the Card murders case." - Hopper shook your shoulders, making you furrow a little.

James wasn't aggressive at that moment, no, he was just making you listen. And not just to register information that was coming out of his mouth. He wanted you to listen to what he was saying with the tone of his voice. It was really important for you to understand. But he was shaking your body as if you were a rag doll.

"And I know that if I would tell you a single thing of what have I told you just now, they would make you disappear, maybe they would deport you into the Russian hell I was in, they would get rid of you just like that." - One of his fingers snapped, making you even more scared than before. Your heard was pounding loud and quick, you almost didn't hear a word he had told you.

Was he serious? Was some secret state services spying on you and him, on your home, even your family perhaps? You haven't noticed a thing. Nobody ever had followed you, your phone wasn't monitored, there weren't any weird guys or women in your neighborhood. Ever. But... Jim seemed kinda serious, which made you gasp for air.

"I couldn't do that because I love you. And trust me, Tuinal didn't cause any of the things I've just told you. I'm not shittin' you, I'm not sayin' weird shit, it's just how it is." - Jim slowly let go of you, letting you step away from him as you started to panic again, covering your mouth with your palm. It wasn't the usual panic attack, this was... You were horrified.

It was hard to believe since what he had told was straightaway King-novel fanfiction shit. Hardcore eighties sci-fi and horror at its best. But... What would you do if Hopper had a chance to prove each of his points? What would you do then?

A fucking creature from which crawled another dimension was getting your girl, who had telepathic abilities by the way, and her friends in danger. And your fiancé was there both times, trying to keep your world and family safe.

"Look at this from my point of view, Jim. This is... Wild. This is more than fucking wild. Even if it would be a work of your imagination, which would be kinda incredible when I think about your imagination, it still would be wild. But you told me that there is... Proof, right? You can show me, that what you said?" - You asked again, pushing him away from the stove to continue with cooking the lunch.

"It is slightly illegal and can be called a trespassin', but I can show you everythin'." - Jim nodded and lit up a cigarette, taking one out of the pack you had there. You knew that you'd have to open up the window since both your mom and your dad were non-smokers. They wouldn't be very glad if they'd somehow find out that you or James smoked inside.

"I'm gonna give you the benefit of the doubt and I'm willing to go there... Whenever your damn Lab even is. But if it turns out to be all just one big lie, I swear to God, Jim. You're on thin fucking ice and if that ice breaks under you..." - You rose your eyebrows, looking out of the window. Jesus, you were torn apart into two halves - one wanted to believe him, you wanted to believe Jim so, so, so fucking bad. You were still in love with him, which was undeniable.

In the end, you lived together for... About two years? You couldn't even count it since Hopper was disappearing rather frequently and was gone... For sometimes a week, something three months, sometimes half a year. It was hard to establish how much time from those three years, two and a half years specifically, you had a normal relationship. Were you even in that phase? In the phase of having a normal relationship?

The other half inside of you was fucking sure that Jim had gone insane. Because using shit from D&D, tying up all the people you knew into the story, telling you that it always happened only when you weren't around... Jesus fucking Christ. You took in another deep breath and lit up a cigarette too, trying to keep your head straight. You were shaking. Your muscles were spasming and letting go at a pace so fast that your body was burning up.

After serving Jim the lunch, you both dressed up to be at least warm and able to move in the winter outside. Jim had taken your dad's splitters along with an old flashlight and put them on the backseat while he made you sit behind the steering wheel. You were a bit nervous, which was leveling up adequately with your inability to start the car.

"God fucking damn it, this dumb old car, I swear." - You mumbled under your breath when the engine didn't want to start working. Without further ado, Jim got off the car and opened up the hood, looking inside of it. He still had the same expression had when he was trying to start your car. Your car was a moody machine, especially in winter. Hopper breathed out a bit of fog on his fingers, trying to warm them up before he started to play with the cables.

"Kick it." - He looked at you with his eyebrows risen. You did as you were told and turned the engine key, making the engine yell loudly. You would be lost in the winter when it wouldn't be for Jim. Nobody except him and your dad had the skill to start that old crap. Jim sat back to you with a shit-eating grin, making you grin as well.

You were driving while he was telling you where to take a turn and where you should drive in the woods. Not too long after that, you were parking the car near an old facility which seemed to be empty and abandoned for quite some time. The snow was reaching up to your waist and thighs, so it was quite hard to even get in front of the Lab. The glass door were shattered, from squatters or someone like that you assumed, so getting wasn't too much trouble either.

That was when you saw it - blood on the ground and walls. That made you cover up your mouth and hope that you won't throw up.

"That's where Bob had died. Owens had to leave the place so quickly they barely packed everythin'." - Jim said behind you quietly in a mourning voice. That made you stand up. There was no body, but the tracks of blood, even if someone was trying to cover them up with paint, were still visible. - "You doin' good?" - His palm gently patted and then smoothed your back, making you a bit more comfortable. Tears were coming up to your eyes again when you watched the spot.

As you told, you didn't know Bob that well - you knew that man only from Jim's and Joyce's stories and from meeting him less than five times. But the man was a genuine good person. That was why you were so fucking moved by seeing the exact spot where he... Passed away. Or where he was eaten to death. Dear God.

When you nodded, Jim took you further into the facility. The windows were shattered so the ice-cold winter evening wind was howling through there, the walls were graffitied, but to your surprise, some of the lights were still working.

Documents marked as super-secret were scattered in the ground, even if most of the text was blacked with a marker. There was a lot of equipment left behind, medical and research tools just scattered around on the ground and in the empty rooms. Jim really meant what he told you; the government basically made Owens clear the building in two days - which was why there was all the stuff still here. Owens only packed the necessities, pushed them into three loaded military trucks and left the place as if nothing ever happened there. Or that was at least what Murray was telling.

It maybe was looking scary, but it still wasn't anything unusual. It was just the vibe of the place that was off. Until you tripped over something. Before you fell into the ground, Jim caught you, but your eyes widened in realization. You tripped over a pile of bones. Something had died and rotted there.

But it was too small to be an adult human bones. First, when you squated, took a paper from the ground to cover your fingers, you thought that maybe it could be bones of a child. But when you picked one up and looked at it closely, your breath hitched once again. Back in your day on highschool, you studied medicine and anatomy a lot, since you didn't know if you want to be a normal doctor or a psychologist when you grow up. You liked to have a back up plan and medicine was quite interesting as well. So you knew how human bones should look like; you once even saw some.

But that structure, shape, the color... Nothing seemed to be even close to how should human bones look like. First, you thought that maybe, it could be some animal bones of an nimal which was dragged there or tried to escape to safety - you would be sure since veterinary medicine wasn't really you thing.

Then you noticed it. It just hit your eyes - small spikes on the bones. You knew that birds had their bone structure practically full so they could fly... But an animal with spikes on their bones? No. Any known animal had spikes on its bones as far as you were informed.

"This... Jim..." - You gasped for air and put the bone back on the pile. Slowly, the things he told you about Bob, these Demogorgons and shit... It seemed to be more and more real with each passing second.

"We ain't endin' here." - Jim told you and led even further into the facility; specifically under it. You needed to take a few staircases which were quite long, but you were at least one or two levels under the surface of land. The door was locked with a chip reader, so Hopper just broke in after a few tries.

That was where the shit got wild. Some lights were working, some were just lighting up just to go dark in the next second, flickering and making the atmosphere darker and darker.

You were in something that could be called an observation station with a few machines. There was a monitor that was showing something when it was working, a lot of buttons and a microphone. A wheelchair was thrown on the ground just few feet away from you. The place was giving you chills.

On your left, something like a decontamination chamber could be seen, the automatic door now being opened and not powered by the electric circuit.

"Where are we, James?" - You asked in a whisper, being really unnerved at that second. Jim didn't respond, the only thing he did was that he walked further in.

So you followed him.

[hargrove-mayfields]

A Stake of Holly in Her Heart Pt . 2

Pt. 1

At 6 in the morning, the time they had agreed upon years ago as their time to wake up on Christmas Day, it’s Susan who gently shakes Max awake, not Billy putting the blaring alarm clock up to his sisters ear.

But Max is already awake, her tears soaking the sheets on her brother's bed, wishing her mom would just forget to wake her up entirely and leave her there to weep.

The first “Merry Christmas” she hears is from Neil as he grabs beer out of the fridge, not Billy, who would’ve said it with as much sarcasm as possible as he shoved her out of the way so he could get to his presents first.

There’s no doubt in Max’s mind that Susan told him to say it, that he didn’t actually have any Christmas spirit in that Scroogey old heart of his to spread wishes of holiday cheer, which only makes the sentiment hurt more.

It’s her sitting on the floor by herself with a flashing camera in her face, tearing wrapping paper off of a bunch of pointless gifts with as little enthusiasm as possible.

She notices that, compared to previous years, there aren’t a whole lot less presents under the tree, and that only makes her feel worse about opening them without her Billy there to put sticky bows in her hair or toss wrapping paper balls at her.

By the time she opens half of her presents, including a makeup set she isn’t going to use, a cassette from a pop band she’s never even heard of, and a new pair of chucks she’s probably going to be made fun of for, Max feels her lip start to tremble, and her eyes blur over the multicolored lights on the tree.

The floodgates really open when, after lowering her camera, the dreaded question comes past her mother’s lips,

“What’s the matter Maxine, honey?”

That’s all it takes for her to be a bawling mess in the middle of a pile of wrapping paper and presents she doesn’t really want anyways.

Because there’s so much that is the matter in this particular moment that no answer any shorter than a 30 page thesis could even begin to describe what Max was feeling on that Christmas morning.

She wants to tell them that she doesn’t want these generic gifts from parents who know nothing about her, that she doesn’t want to be forced into the role of the perfect, cookie cutter family you’d see on a Christmas card, that all she wants is her brother back, but she's choked up, any attempt at speaking drowned out by a sob.

In this house, authority demands a response, an explanation is due for why their holiday is being ruined by such behavior, so Max has to choke back her sobs and whine out some pathetic excuse.

She comes up with something like ‘Dustin said he was getting a new Nintendo and I didn’t,’ but nobody really believes that.

They work it out of her eventually, earning a confession through threats of taking presents away like she was a toddler, and when that doesn’t work, a backhand to the face and a hand in her hair like she was any older than fourteen.

But telling them that she missed Billy a lot and that she felt guilty celebrating the holiday she knew was secretly his favorite without him around was apparently not the answer they wanted to hear, because Susan drops her camera on the carpet, and Neil leaves the room entirely.

She thinks of how the scene’d make the perfect Hargrove-Mayfield family photo.

The time between opening gifts and Christmas dinner at 3 o’clock was typically reserved for putting batteries in toys, plugging in new electronics to make sure they worked, and trying on new clothes and shoes, but Max’s meltdown under the tree had been enough to set the whole house on edge.

In the chair in the living room, where he always seemed to just sit around and scowl with a beer in his hand these days, Neil was that much grumpier, and Max stayed that much further away from him.

In the kitchen, Susan gets a little clumsier, the sound of her nervous hands clanging pots and pans together reverberating through the eerie quiet that’s come to settle over the house.

Max decides to go back to her room, to avoid all the noise and tension. She lays on her stomach across her double bed and grabs her walkie from where she left it under her pillow.

Tuning into the channel she knew would be occupied by her friends, she hears the boys and Eleven, who had come back with the Byers’ to Hawkins for the holidays, already on their own radios, talking a mile a minute about all of their presents.

That was supposedly a tradition of theirs, calling each other up to share the news of all they’d gotten, but she hadn’t been able to take part in it last year. She feels sick to her stomach thinking about last Christmas, the last one she would ever spend with her brother, so she keeps eavesdropping without telling her friends she’s there.

After so long, the boys all have their turns to gush about their new NES games and records, and in El’s case Barbie dolls and comic books, and the conversation slows down a little so Lucas can ask, “Has anyone heard from MadMax?”

All around there’s denial, and she hears Lucas sigh and say, “I’m getting kind of worried about her.”

A buzz of static from Mike's end, “She'll be fine, dude.”

“Way to be an asshole, Mike.” Dustin cuts in.

Defensively, Mike says, “What? I just meant that she’s like, super tough.”

Will tunes in then, the sound of his laugh cutting through the scratchy static, “Aren’t you not supposed to talk like that about other girls in front of your girlfriend.”

“What do you know about girlfriends?” Mike exclaims, clearly offended from the way his voice breaks.

And from there the conversation keeps on like that, just a couple of teenage boys loudly arguing over things that are not her problem, so she shuts the walkie off.

But, as she rolls over onto her back, what Mike said is really sticking with her.

Was she really supposed to be fine?

She couldn’t wrap her head around how everyone else was able to just keep on like normal while she was stuck mourning the greatest loss she had ever experienced on a day typically reserved for cheerfulness. It didn’t seem fair.

Staring up at her popcorn ceiling, she lets her thoughts drift back to times when Christmas wasn’t like this.

Her first Christmas without her dad, she remembers being upset the whole time, his singular gift he sent to her in the mail not really enough to make up for his absence. At the time she was too young to realize it, but Billy had put extra effort into cheering her up that day, letting her pick all of her presents out first, and giving her all the cookies that didn’t get burnt in the oven.

Now that Billy’s the missing piece, she has no one.

On Christmas Eve a few years back, Neil kicked Billy out of the house, and he had to spend the holiday at a friend’s place. He called Max that morning to tell her that she could open his presents if she wanted to, and to be careful around Neil. She understood that Billy was looking out for her when she saw her stepfather smack her mother for the first time under the mistletoe.

Last Christmas, her and Billy weren’t really on speaking terms, and just the thought of the way things were between them filled her heart with so much remorse. She thought she had all the time in the world to be angry with her brother, never in a million years would she have thought that Christmas of ‘84 would be his last.

In retrospect, knowing now that just months after the fact Billy would be gone, there was so, so much she wished she would have done differently.

Because he’d been trying to make up for it, had made his attempt at earning her forgiveness, and she’d rejected every last one. She thought he deserved it then, but she would give anything to be able to go back in time and accept his ride to the snowball, to drink the hot chocolate he made her instead of letting it sit until it got cold, to take new Christmas photos where she didn’t have a scowl on her face every time she was near Billy.

Before she can dig herself too far into her grave of despair, she’s interrupted by the dull tone of the ringing phone.

Without anybody even telling her to answer it, she knows it’s her Aunt Nicole, who always called her on Christmas like she was still a little girl because she wanted to hear what all Max got this year.

She sighs and wipes away any lingering tears from her face, dragging herself off the bed and trudging across the room as slowly and loudly as possible, just in case there was any question as to how exactly she felt about forced family bonding.

The phone she used to keep on her dresser had since been thrown out the window in a fit of Neil’s rage, so she has to go out to the kitchen to answer it.

Right now, listening to the shrieking and dehumanizingly pitiful voice of aunt Nicole was the very last thing she wanted to do, but Susan sends her a stern look from where she’s stood at the stove that tells her she has to.

“Hiya Maxie!” Every year she underestimated how loud her aunt was, and always had to pull the receiver back away from her ear. “How are ya?”

“I’m alright Aunt Nicky.” It had seemed like the right thing to say, nobody wanted to hear about her being all depressing anyways, but she regrets it the moment Nicole’s response comes.

“Oh, that’s great honey! You know, I would’ve expected you to be all mopey over Neil’s boy.” She chuckles at her own words, though through the static of long distance it sounds more like a cackle, and continues on, “Lord knows how emotional you get over such silly little things.”

Then, as though she hadn’t just doubly insulted her niece, she asks, “Anywho, did ya get anything good this year? Maxie?”

But Max doesn't even hear the question. She drops the receiver and walks away, entirely unable to stomach what Nicole said.

The phone is left dangling from its cord for her mother to pick up, as she blinks away the bitter sting of tears and marches straight through the living room.

But before she can escape back to her bedroom, Neil catches her wrist on the way through, his grip tight enough that she can feel her bones grinding together as he holds her there.

She hears Susan in the next room frantically trying to explain the situation to her sister, making up a more respectable excuse about boyfriend drama, which would’ve made Max pretty upset if the very angry step-father trapping her in the living room wasn't the greatest of her worries.

Once Susan is off the phone, Max gets herself a good old fashioned talking to, the same ‘respect and responsibility’ speech she’d heard a thousand times before, accented with a twist to the wrist if she doesn’t answer quickly enough or assuredly enough, or forgot the yes sir tagged onto the end.

After he’s confirmed it a good five times that Max fully understands the consequences of disrespecting her family, he squeezes harder and her wrist pops and her fingers go numb. Susan must decide that’s enough, because she asks for Neil’s help with something in the kitchen.

Without looking back once to see the scene she was leaving behind, Max seizes the opportunity to escape back to her bedroom, though she can feel Neil’s eyes burning a hole in her back as he watches her scurry away.

It’s with shaky hands that she locks the door behind herself, and she sits down with her back against it. She flexes her fingers to make sure they still work, and moves her wrist around so she’ll know if it’s broken, coming to the conclusion that, other than the dark red fingerprints blemishing her pale skin, she’ll be alright.

There’s a battery operated radio on her nightstand that she turns on to try to drown out the sound of the developing screaming match in the living room, since the topic of discussion is her, but the irony of every song telling of love and joy and peace on earth is too much, and she shuts it off.

She sheds a few tears for her childhood, for nostalgia of simpler Christmases as it fades away to the sound of her fighting parents, and for the ache pulsing in her wrist and other silly little things, but most of all, she cries for her brother.

Read also on ao3!

[some-mad-lunge]

When Alex Manes Loves You

This is a Isobel x Alex friendship fic with a whole bunch of Malex for good measure. For @bisexualalienblast who always deserves a smile and who dragged me into this fandom.

************************************

He takes care of you.

Alex leaned over the building plans spread out on the table. They were almost certain this was another facility, one that might just have some of the answers they were desperate for.

Well most of them were, Michael still wasn’t sure what Alex’s motivation was. At least not anymore. How many sins of your father were you supposed to atone for before you were square?

Max was sitting in a chair, he still had trouble standing for too long. Coming back from death was a bitch. Still he seemed to be taking in everything Alex was saying. At least someone was.

Michael couldn’t seem to tear his eyes away from Isobel and he wasn’t paying attention to anything else.

She’d walked in 10 minutes earlier, flounced in really, and tossed her bag in the corner like she’d done it a million times. Michael had only been to Alex’s bunker once before. He could swear there were ghosts in the walls, it made him feel watched. Isobel, however, seemed comfortable as could be.

It irked him.

She was in yoga clothes, an old habit she’d picked back up since she found out her husband was a serial killer. He didn’t think she believed in all that zen bullshit but he wasn’t about to say anything about her new exercise kick. With Isobel you picked your battles.

She’d barely been there two minutes when Alex reached into his own duffel bag and tossed something in Isobel’s direction without even looking at her. She caught it with ease, wrinkled her nose. It looked like homemade trail mix, how very military.

“I can't deal with your hanger today. Yes, there’s M&M’s in there somewhere. Anyway, as I was saying…” Alex kept talking but Michael doesn’t hear it.

It’s a simple thing, so tiny and insignificant but all Michael can do is stare at the bag in Isobel’s hands. She flicked her fingers around inside, digging until she finds what she’s looking for. She held the chocolate between her thumb and forefinger, smirked at Alex before she popped it in her mouth.

The smile Alex gives her in response can only be described as fond, lips Michael once knew intimately pursed in amusement.

He doesn’t want to name the feeling that rolled around in his stomach, refused to acknowledge it. When Isobel held the bag out and Alex took a handful without looking up from the table Michael felt his whole body clench.

He humours you.

He was getting used to being in Alex’s space, not just his bunker, their unofficial place to discuss all things alien conspiracy, but near him. Close enough to feel the heat of his dark skin, breathe the same air. It doesn’t hurt anymore, at least not as much.

Maybe they would be friends after all.

That is until he walks in, sees Kyle laughing, Alex with a bemused expression on his face and Isobel hanging something on the wall.

When Michael read what it said he couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow in disbelief.

“There. Now it’s more homey.” Isobel stood with her hands on her hips, glanced over at Michael with a small smile on her lips. It’s the first genuine one he’s seen in months.

Later when Alex and Michael are sitting at the screens, he leaned over, kept his voice low.

“Are you really going to leave that up?”

He shrugged, but Michael doesn’t miss the way the skin on Alex’s arm beside his prickled in goosebumps. It gave him a rush of warmth, a feeling of satisfaction he missed too much to admit.

“It makes her happy.”

And that seemed good enough for Alex.

When Michael walked out later he reads the words. He knows it’s a joke, but he can’t seem to laugh.

Bunker Sweet Bunker

He makes you smile.

Max was keeping a very close eye on his sister and Michael was along for the ride. Today was her wedding anniversary. No one mentions it, no one dared to, but they knew it would be a hard day for her. She wouldn’t admit it, because weakness was not a word in Isobel’s vocabulary. So instead Max was brooding, pouring Isobel wine in the middle of the day like this was some joyful alien family gathering and not them trying to make sure she doesn’t crack.

Michael knew that Isobel probably would have preferred to have Alex here. They were so chummy now it made his skin crawl. Another thing he hated to admit, he was jealous of her. It was something he was used to in a way. At least before all her walls came down, and he learned life for her wasn’t as easy as he liked to imagine.

Alex had been the one to ask Max, and therefore by association Michael, to look after Isobel today. The soldier and Kyle (who he would never admit to being envious of, even if you put a syringe of the cure in his arm) were gone on some secret fact finding mission. Michael didn’t know the details. Which was fine.

Let Isobel and Alex have their wine nights. Let Kyle be Alex’s right hand man. It didn’t bother Michael in the slightest.

You’re a miserable liar.

But Max was still hovering, and Isobel just kept sighing and rolling her eyes like she was the one doing them a favour.

The doorbell rang and Michael watched her jump to her feet, no doubt happy for a brief reprieve from their lame attempts at comfort. There had been a time when it was always just the three of them, even when they hated it. God, even when they resented it, at least they had each other. But as more people were let in, as more people were trusted, it blurred what they were to each other.

Michael hated the feeling.

Isobel came back into her living room practically skipping, a package in her hands. Max was instantly on edge, like it would contain a bomb or something. She liked to shop, Michael could only imagine what she’d purchased herself this time.

It wasn’t until he saw her chuckle as she read a card that he realized it was a gift. She placed it on the coffee table and hummed to herself as she used her thumbnail to break through the taped up box. He swiped the card and felt his stomach clench as he read the words inside, the handwriting a little too familiar.

If you’re going to be a widow, best do it right.

Sentiments, et cetera, don’t drink all the wine without me.

A.

Alex hadn’t even signed his full name, just the first letter. Because she would know who it was. Of course she would. It made Michael seethe.

He heard Isobel’s gasp of delight and watched as she unwrapped a black hat, satiny and classic, a small black veil in the front. To anyone else it would be in poor taste, but as she put it on her head and drew the wisp of a veil over her eyes she was positively beaming.

She looked like a vamp in a noir movie, the widow in fake mourning. It suited her, Michael could admit that. The radiant smile on her face filled him up, made him forget his earlier anger. Alex had given Isobel something, made the day easier. He couldn’t be anything but thankful, even it it was begrudgingly.

She ran to look in the mirror, preened at herself and then started rambling about something or other. Max gave Michael a confused look, he just shrugged in response.

He tried to not remember the times when Alex gave Michael exactly what he had needed, exactly when he had needed it.

He leans on you.

As soon as he read the text from Maria he’d gotten into his truck without thinking. When he’d seen her name he’d frozen for a second. They’d ended things a few weeks prior. No drama, no tears. They just weren’t it for each other. He loved her. He always would. Just not the way he was supposed to.

Then her words had him in motion, he had to get to Alex. He couldn’t be alone, not right now, even though Michael was sure he’d demand it and then tear himself up in the process.

It was still light out when he pulled his truck up Alex’s drive. He was stunned for a moment to see not just Kyle’s car but Isobel’s as well. He debated turning around, pretend he’d never come until he saw the front door open and Isobel stepped out onto the porch.

No going back now, so he climbed out, boots kicking up dust. Isobel offered him a small smile.

“Is he…” Michael didn’t know what to ask. Of course he wasn’t okay. Jesse Manes was dead and even if he was the devil incarnate he was still Alex’s dad.

“No, but he will be. Kyle and him are on the back deck grilling steaks.” She was still blocking his path, and Michael knew how to read a room. “We’re going to get him wasted and put him to bed.”

He nodded at her, he’d never felt like he didn’t belong before, not with Isobel. Never with Alex. It felt like being a ship adrift on the water, nowhere to go.

“I just thought he could use a friend.”

“He can, that’s why we’re here.” She wrapped her arms around herself, the way she always did when she’s about to hurt him. Especially when she doesn’t mean to. “I don’t think it’s a good idea…”

He doesn’t let her finish the sentence, it’s already too much. “Yeah, I get it.”

Instead he turned away, felt ridiculous for coming there in the first place.

“Michael.” It’s soft but he hears it. So he stopped, took a deep breath and looked over his shoulder. “You’re more than that to him. So much more and he shouldn’t have to deal with that too. Not right now.”

He gave her a quick nod, because she has appointed herself Alex’s protector and he wants to thank her. Even if it meant keeping him away, Michael knows Alex is kept safe and loved. Even if it can’t be by him.

And whose decision was that?

The thought pounded in his head on repeat for the next three days.

He never stops.

It’s in the bunker, because of course it is. Just the two of them, Isobel’s stupid sign on the wall and a lab coat that no doubt belongs to Kyle thrown over a chair. They had been looking at something on the computer again, Michael leaned in too close as he tried to memorize everything he could.

He never gets to touch, not anymore, so his eyes are always hungry. It’s not sexual, at least not always, tonight he’s fascinated by the way Alex’s hair is in disarray. Frustrated hands running through it with every other click of the keyboard. Michael wants to replace them with his own, soothe the dark cloud Alex is giving off. Put fingers to tense shoulders and dig in.

He fights it, because that’s all he does around Alex anymore. Torture himself by looking and beat down the part of him that wants to do something about it.

Finally they gave up, Michael tried to make some stupid joke that failed miserably at being funny. Alex just lifts a corner of his mouth, like he appreciated Michael for even trying.

They both reach to grab Michael’s jacket at the same time, hands brushing for a moment, eyes locking in surprise.

With them, that’s all it takes. Match to gasoline and everything burns around them. Alex biting into his mouth, pushing him against the table, stealing his breath and his heart. He whimpered, because it’s them and he never thought he’d get this again. Wouldn’t let himself ask for it.

But the sound snapped Alex back to reality, made him lean away and fingers slipped from their grip in Michael’s hair. The sudden cold that slipped over him made his bones hurt.

“Michael, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have…”

“I love you.”

Alex stilled, hands squeezing hard where they rested on Michael’s arms. Alex doesn’t say anything but he doesn’t have to. His face is awe struck, his eyes bright. They both know, they’ve always known, they’ve just never said it.

Why had they never just said it?

But this time maybe it isn’t enough, maybe it’s too late and they didn’t figure it out in time. Maybe he’d let Alex push him far enough away that Michael hadn’t found his way back in time. Maybe they’d…

Then Alex is on him again, just as intense, just as needy but gentle, almost reverent. He’s unbuttoning Michael’s shirt, brushing their noses together..

“I love you.” Michael can taste it on his tongue.

“I love you.” It hums through his blood.

“I love you.” It’s whispered into his mouth.

“We’re going to talk, okay. After.” Michael can only nod in agreement as his shirt is pushed off his shoulders, as teeth drag at his lip and he’s welcomed home.

[every1studio]

SERIES: “stages of love: words left unsaid” [ateez: wooyoung]

genre: a dash of angst + small fluff + some smut + kind of long 

ficstyle: bulletpoints + series  [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [END]

prompt: inspired by “1,2″ by Lee Hi [listen to Hanbin demo version for max. effects] + “We Don’t Talk Together” by Heize ft Giriboy  + “Hold Me Tight” by BTS 

note: [this fic as some smut, so if you are uncomfortable with smut; DO NOT READ //  also has mentions of alcohol and self-harm ): ]

your heart was caught in your throat when you got that text from Mingi

the one saying that he was still touring in Japan and wasn’t going to meet up with Yunho at the airport

so why did Yunho text you that

why would he lie to you?

all of your trust for him slowly started to crumble 

right then and there, you get a call from Yunho 

your shaking hands fumbled as you swiped to answer the call 

“h-hey?” you didn’t want to suspect him of anything without any evidence

“hey are you free? I... I wanna see you..” you could see his puppy-like smile through the tone of his voice

but this could all be a facade; maybe you didn’t know everything about him like you thought you did

“yeah! sure! did...” you prayed that this conversation wouldn’t be the break of your relationship 

“did you pick up Mingi from the airport?”

you hear him nervously chuckle, “his flight got cancelled so I just went to dance studio to get ready for this week’s classes..”

you wish he was telling the truth

what was so bad that he had to lie to you?

you just recently reunited with your best friend from your childhood 

not only was he your best friend.. but he was your crush 

you couldn’t talk to him in person about this

with the safety of being in your own bed, you HAD to know the truth 

you had dealt through too many problems with your love life

you had enough 

“I texted Mingi”

there was no reply on the other side of the line 

“Y/N...can I please talk to you in person..”

you felt your tightening the grip on your phone

“whatever you need to say, you can say it right now.. if you feel like there’s nothing you NEED to say... then I don’t want to talk to you.. at all”

the line was still on but the only thing you heard was his devastation 

“that’s it then...goodbye Yunho” 

you hung up the phone and blocked him right away

you didn’t want to feel so pathetic but you did

you clenched your fists so tight you could feel your fingernails digging pain into your hands 

but nothing hurt more than having the concept of love failing you 

over and over and over again 

you got a text from San

-hey! there’s a party tonight at a friend’s place, wanna come with?

that was all you needed to get all of this off of your mind

even though you were more of the reserved type and would consider yourself to be more of an introvert than an extrovert, you wanted to go to that party 

and have fun without worrying about anything or anyone 

you wanted to feel like expensive version of yourself 

you always covered your body but tonight was the night you were going to show off your curves

you wanted to stand out so you found the brightest and tightest dress you owned; which was a bright, true red bodycon dress with piped linings that extenuated your boobs and your chest 

it was shorter than what you usually wore but having it be held up by two non functional strings that were meant to be straps that constantly fell off of your shoulders

you matched this dress with some nude, red-bottom heels that your mom got you for Christmas 

you let your hair out of your usual messy ponytail and lightly curled it

watching makeup tutorials for fun made you inspired to get more into this new character of yours; your followed an easy smokey eyeshadow look that wouldn’t be overwhelming for some mascara 

paired it with a transferproof darker red lip and packed on some highlighter so you could glow to the gods

and pray that with a look like this, you can finally find a guy who appreciates you 

San sends you a text saying that he’s at the door as you were spraying on some luxurious perfume 

he could hear you trotting to the door in what sounded like high heels 

his brows were raised as his eyes were about to pop out of his sockets

you were absolutely stunning and breathtaking and all of the words in the dictionary could not describe how beautiful you looked 

San almost forgot the promise he made to himself when you loop your arm around his

“ready?”

he smiles and nods as he walks you to his car 

San was trying hard to keep his eyes on the road when you were right there next to him 

“so... is Mingi in town?”

you clenched your teeth so that you try and control your tears from welling up

“no... I.. don’t wanna talk about Mingi... or Yunho..”

it broke his heart to see you so sad but he nods and changes the subject 

you were so surprised to see that there was a parking lot for house near a college campus 

you didn’t know that it was a GRAND party

“how do you know someone like this?” you were in awe as the cool air hit you as you got out of the car

“you could say he is just a classmate who has become a pretty good friend of mine..”

you started to feel self-conscious of yourself; maybe you wouldn’t fit in

right when the door open was when you saw the closest thing you’ve seen of a Greek God 

“oh.. San.. is this your plus one?” the boy’s voice was just as charming as his face  

San put his arm around your shoulder, “this is Y/N, my friend.. Y/N, this is Wooyoung.. who’s also my friend..”

Wooyoung reached out for a hug, “a friend of San is a friend of mine”

you could get intoxicated by his scent

how could a guy be so infuriatingly handsome in every way?

a group of girls were passing by when Wooyoung politely stops them, “excuse me ladies, could you help my friend here get settled in with some drinks?” 

they giggled and nodded as they took your hand and led you into the house 

you look back at San and Wooyoung as they nodded at you indicating that is was okay 

San turns back to Wooyoung

“so what’s up?” 

Wooyoung massaged the back of his neck in a shy manner

“Y/N.. you said she was just a friend right?”

San’s stomach began to churn, “yup.. just a friend..”

San could see the glimmer of hope in Wooyoung’s eye

“it’s okay if I... get to know her?” he moves his head in the direction you walked in 

“maybe you should just... yeah... just get to know her I guess...” 

you were surrounded by the bunch of girls that escorted you to the table with the drinks 

“how do you know such a handsome guy?”

“are you close with Wooyoung?”

“what’s the other guy’s name?”

“you’re so pretty! no wonder the guys are into you! who are you interested in?”

you were so confused by the choices of questions that were asked, you had no idea how to answer them 

but before you could say anything, you felt a gentle hand on your back 

“sorry ladies, I’m gonna have to steal Y/N from you for a moment..”

they nodded as they giggled about finding San 

you looked up and saw Wooyoung

he was such a gentleman; you found yourself blushing 

he refills your drink then leads you out to the area where the music was blaring 

small talk led to a heart to heart talk 

“so... are you seeing anyone?” you were surprised that someone like Wooyoung would be interested in someone like you 

“well... it’s kind of complicating but-”

“Y/N?”

that familiar voice made chills rush down your spine 

you turned as saw Yunho

with Aurora clinging onto his arm 

as if this girl couldn’t stop ruining your life, she had to take your best friend, your childhood friend, your first love

you wanted to hide and runaway; you subconsciously gripped the shirt 

Wooyoung reading your body language, he slithered his arm around your waist and pulled you closer

“what business do you have with Y/N?”

Yunho sobered up right when he saw you 

he wanted to push Aurora off of his arm but she was clinging in a little too tightly for comfort 

“I wanted to check up on her-”

“are you her boyfriend?” Wooyoung cuts him off

but you answer instead of Yunho, “no, he isn’t.. I wouldn’t want a boyfriend who would lie to me...”

you pulled Wooyoung into the dance circle

Aurora wanted to follow suit and tried to drag Yunho

Yunho doesn’t budge, “what are you doing?”

“who does she think she is? now she’s with some rich guy? come on we have to show her that we’re better than her..”

Yunho still doesn’t budge when Aurora tries to tug a little harder

“what is it to you anyways? just leave her alone..”

“because all the guys that I want to be with always talk about her, okay? I’m sick of it!” Aurora screams only for a couple of people around her to hear her through the blasting music 

when Aurora went for Hongjoong, all he kept talking about was how amazing you were at composing and singing and playing the guitar

when she went back to Seonghwa to sabotage you, he ended up not going back with her because he was the one missing you and not her 

when she dated Jongho, he would say that he would be better being single than ever dating someone as toxic as her, then saw him smiling at your little gestures a couple days after 

she was sick of hearing about you and seeing you 

she wanted to be the one with the attention; you were in her way 

so when Yunho confronted her about ruining your love life, she blackmailed him saying that if he didn’t date her, she would continue to destroy your life in ways that couldn’t even be explained

Yunho only wanted your happiness and was scared for you, so he agreed 

he hated every moment of it; she made sure that he would lie to you via texting or calling

taking up all of his free time so that you couldn’t even meet up with him 

she even told him that if he told her, she would injure herself because of him

although he didn’t like her, he didn’t want her to inflict self-harm 

he knew she needed some sort of mental help so he decided to be her “boyfriend” to help her out 

in exchange, he didn’t have the chance of telling how he felt about you and how much he cared for you 

seeing you with another guy shattered his heart in pieces but he knew that he probably shattered yours into fine dust 

and all of this was his fault

Yunho let Aurora drag him like a ragdoll 

when you saw Yunho and Aurora in your sight, you turned yourself to them as you started to dance on Wooyoung

Wooyoung gently sweeps your hair off of your shoulders as he leans in to ask, “are you okay? is there anything I can do? do you want me to kick them out?”

you could feel the tears accumulating as you interlocked your hands around his neck

“please make me forget about him..”

without another word, Wooyoung pulls you in closer to his body and cups his other hand on your face as he leans in to kiss you 

it was a needy yet gentle kiss; you couldn’t get enough of it 

you felt a little pride swell up inside of you knowing that Yunho and Aurora were watching the two of you 

Aurora wanted to copy you and Wooyoung but Yunho just couldn’t take his eyes off of you

he was so angry at himself; he could’ve been the one kissing you and holding you tight 

“shall we take this elsewhere?” Wooyoung lets you catch your breath

when your eyes meet his, it’s like the world stopped for a minute

you could tell that he was genuinely worried about you and that you were okay with everything that he asked of 

you nodded and he led you to another part of the house where no one was allowed

how classy was it to be escorted to his room while getting frisky in the elevator 

his thick thigh kept some friction for you inbetween your legs 

your hands were tugging his hair to his shirt 

his hands were all over your body yet you were comfortable with it 

if anything you wanted more

it was like..

“it’s like my hands are made for your body”

he said exactly what you were thinking

right when you heard the ding of the elevator, Wooyoung swept you up like a princess as he was huffing through his smile 

“I’m gonna make sure that you’ll only be thinking about me tonight, princess”

maybe it was the alcohol but you felt a certain type of warm tingling sensation fill you up to the brim 

despite of the lust in his eyes, he was really gentle with you 

he placed you comfortably on the bed as he peppered you in kisses from your forehead down to your pooling heat as he hikes your dress up to get access to where you needed attention 

before he continues he looks to meet eyes with you, “I want to know that you’re okay with this..”

you nod but he wasn’t satisfied with just that; he cowers over you so that you could look at him, face to face

“I want to hear you say if you are.. I want you to be comfortable with-”

you cut him off with a passionate kiss

you had sex before but it was only a one-night stand kind of deal

but this time, you felt like it was going to be different 

“I’m okay.. I’ll let you know if it isn’t...”

you could feel him smile through the kiss

“you’re absolutely beautiful... I want you to feel like the most beautiful girl in the world because you are”

he goes back down to take off your panties with his teeth

if you didn’t feel yourself growing wet since you were dancing with him

you definitely did now

Wooyoung leaned in to take in all of your essence; you whined at the lack of pleasure 

“Wooyoung.. please..”

“so eager for me..”

with that he dove himself right into your heat; his nose continuously hitting your clit 

you didn’t know that he was going to go that hard but you loved every moment of it 

he was working you up so good that you didn’t know what to do between pushing his head away or pushing closer to you

you felt yourself quickly spiraling into an abyss of pleasure 

“Woo-Wooyoung.. I-I..”

he quickens the pace of his tongue as he adds in his finger

for every time that you clench around his tongue and finger, he adds another finger

by the time he got to three fingers, you were seeing the Milky Way 

your body convulsively shook under Wooyoung

he was just in awe watching you come down from your high

you were sprawled out for him; your straps hanging off of your shoulders, hair placed as if you were an art piece from the Renaissance and just panting as you squeezed tears of pleasure from your eyes

Wooyoung leans down to kiss them with the scent of you still covering his mouth, “how’s my baby doing?”

you didn’t know why; you just met this guy and yet you have completely fallen head over heels for him 

the way he called you baby made you feel like he was just about everything you wanted and more  

“I want more”

that was all Wooyoung needed to unravel

he unbuttoned his black satin shirt showcasing his toned-body 

although he left his shirt on, he completely took off everything from the lower part of his body

you drooled at the sight of his proudly standing member; you couldn’t keep your eyes off of it

Wooyoung chuckles as he lifts your chin up to look at him, “eyes up here, princess..”

you too wanted to take off your clothes but Wooyoung stops you

“leave them on.. you look so good I want to remember me fucking you in this dress so that every time I see this dress I can remember how we met..”

Wooyoung reaches over to grab a condom but you gently grab his wrist

“it’s okay, I’m on birth control... I want to feel all of you...”

he lines himself up to your entrance as he leans into your neck, “you really know how to drive a man crazy...”

there was a mix feeling of pain and pleasure as you could feel him stretching you out

your hands ran through his hair as he continued to work on his deep, purple love bites on your neck 

you didn’t notice how spacious his room was until you heard the echos of the lewd sounds of Wooyoung slamming himself into you 

you couldn’t stop saying his name 

it was as if it was the only word you knew 

“nngh..Y/N.. baby please... don’t clench like that or I’ll cum in seconds...” Wooyoung grunted 

surprised by how much strength he had while still being able to fuck you, he picked you up to flip you around

you were propped up on your elbow as he placed his hands on your raised hips 

he never stopped pumping his dick in and out of you

as soon as you were adjusted into your new position, you started to clench around him again; you couldn’t help it

Wooyoung exhales through his smiles as he could feel himself reaching his peak

“baby, please tell me that you’re getting close because I am-” 

but you reached it before you could even reply to him

your body shook even harder than the first time he made you orgasm; making you squeeze around him harder than you have before 

he came a couple seconds after

you could feel how his thick cum fill you up inside to the point that you could feel it overflowing out of you 

Wooyoung lightly swept the hair away from your neck to kiss it before slowly taking himself out of you

you were and looked completely spent 

he gets up to get you something to clean you up

you took this time to look around his room 

although it was a spacious room, it wasn’t heavily decorated; if anything it was kind of empty, kind of lonely 

he returns with his pants back on, holding a wet towel and some water

“you’re really something you know that?” he’s always smiling but you feel like there’s something more to his smile 

you chuckle trying to hide your blush, “are you like this with all of the girls?”

he gets up from cleaning you up and fixes your dress and hair

“I actually don’t do this as often as you think..” Wooyoung brushes his sweat-covered hair back so that it’s not sticking to his forehead

“even though you host all of these glamorous parties?” you were feeling pretty exhausted but you wanted to talk to him and get to know him

you didn’t want this to be another one-night stand for the books

Wooyoung wraps his arm around you and has your head in the crook of his neck and shoulder 

“hey now, I’m not your typical college fuckboy, you know..” 

you both laughed softly over the muffled sound of the party downstairs 

“so I’m guessing the guy with Aurora was the guy you were seeing but it was complicated?”

you nodded, “everyone knows Aurora huh...”

Wooyoung sees you sulking, so he pulls you back onto the bed so that your head falls onto his chest, “she’s just a homewrecker... she’s not worth your time, sweetie.. trust me”

“I don’t know.. he was my best friend, childhood friend and first love all in one.. and she’s ruin my life more than just one time a year...”

you wanted to change the topic, “what about you? what’s going on in your life?”

it was like you knew that Wooyoung’s smile was just a mask under his worries, “well.. my dad wants me to take over his plane company.. but I don’t want to. I want to pursue being a pilot. I can’t be a pilot and run a company at the same time. he wants me to run the company, even though my brother is the one who wants to run it...so you can say me and you have it pretty tough huh”

“are you kidding? you’re dealing with grown up stuff and I’m still caught up on the idea of love!”

you didn’t notice that Wooyoung was just looking at you the whole time as you raised your voice

“I think that love is some pretty hardcore group stuff too...” 

you nodded and you both just sat there in the dimmed room with the music still playing in the background 

“you wanna go back down to the party? to show off your battle scars?” Wooyoung broke the silence, “or do you want to runaway, to start over?”

your eyes widened as you looked up at him, “runaway?”

“we could start over? I know we just met.. but I’m willing to take that chance and give you everything to be happy”

you were feeling kind of skeptical, “you wish happiness upon a stranger at first sight?”

“I wish happiness for a girl who deserves more than what the world has to offer”

you got up from his bed to get a better look at him, “I need a couple days...”

Wooyoung follows your action and grabs your hands, “take all the time you need.. it was just an option... maybe we could just get to know each other before we take a big step..”

Wooyoung escorts you back downstairs with his black denim jacket thrown over your shoulders 

you were wobbly from how hard he went on you; he couldn’t help chuckle at his handiwork

you’d jokingly give him a side glare every time he did

you met San on the other side of the elevator 

the first thing he saw was how you clung onto Wooyoung 

how the hickies he gave you popped under Wooyoung’s denim jacket 

to be frankly speaking, San was already heartbroken when he knew he didn’t have a chance with you 

but he was even more broken to see that you would never see him the way you saw a potential lover 

but nevertheless, he smiles, “looks like the two of you were busy. ready to go home?”

you kissed Wooyoung on the cheek before looping your arm through San’s, “I’ll text you when I get home?” 

“I’d rather you call,” Wooyoung said with a seductive smile 

San gives Wooyoung a handshake before taking you back to the car

you and San walked passed all the guys that have affected your love life since you started college

Hongjoong, Seonghwa, Yeosang, Yunho, Jongho

every time you saw one of them, you clung closer and tighter to San

San stares at all of them; knowing who they were and how they broke your heart 

and what he could’ve done to be the one by your side making you happy 

earlier when Wooyoung took you upstairs, San pulled Yunho over to talk to him when Aurora went to the bathroom

“are you trying to break Y/N’s heart? you already broke it once and you’re gonna do it again?”

Yunho shoves San, “don’t talk about Y/N like you know her-”

“I know that she loved you.. I know that she was head over heels for you.. I know that Aurora was the bitch that made you lose hope in love.. so seeing her with you? you’re basically ripping her heart out of her chest..” 

San shoves Yunho back and walks away 

Yunho couldn’t take it anymore 

he had to find you

he had to tell you the truth 

so when he finally found you exiting the elevator, clearly having moved on with Wooyoung, he lost hope

maybe he should just keep the truth to himself

you already seem like you’re happier in the last hour with Wooyoung than you have with Yunho for all your life 

but Hongjoong had words he wanted to say to you too

so did Seonghwa

and Yeosang

and San

and Mingi 

and Jongho 

but they would’ve all kept it to themselves.. because you were glowing now

you had shelled out of your cocoon and had transformed into a beautiful, unattainable butterfly 

these were the boys that left their words unsaid; for the happiness of the girl that they love 

PLEASE LEMME KNOW IF YOU WANT A SEPARATE ENDING FOR EACH MEMBER OR ONE FINAL ENDING WITH ONE SPECIAL MEMBER???

[ masterlist + guidelines ]

[okaybutlikeimagine]

So how did Hop find out about Billy’s home life

Hellohellohello! I feel like this is a very important thing to expand on bc i understand i just kinda write about the fluffy stuff AFTER Hop found out but not about the stuff that lead up to it so! I’m glad someone asked about this!!! And i’m sorry if anyone has gotten confused at all, i know it’s a little confusing ♥

Okay so i wrote a fic (on my blog here and on AO3 here) about when Hop first picks up Billy. I also wrote a post a few months back when i started this blog that describes my main thoughts ((some of them have changed since then but they’re basically the same)) right here! but lemme also summarize it all and give some more info as to what i think about this:

{Disclaimer: mentions of abuse}

So Billy and Max and their family have been in town for almost a week and after the first day Billy gets pulled over by Officer Callahan for driving fast and drunk. So of course Callahan tells Hop and Hop also hears some stuff from his secretary about the new family that just moved in bc she meets Susan at the grocery store and they get to talking. So Hop knows that there’s a new family, knows they have a kid who’s already a troublemaker, knows this kid’s mom is actually his step-mother and that they’ve just moved to Indiana after school has already started (bc hi, tell me who in America starts right before Halloween???? Bc that just seems strange to me, i feel like they’re starting school after everyone else. bc starting school right before Halloween is very very Late)

So on Sunday night, Neil is an asshole to Billy during dinner and Billy steals a bottle of liquor from him and drinks about half of it in his room before Neil walks in and catches Billy looking at himself in the mirror w/ his stolen alcohol. And Neil gets furious and hits Billy hard and bruises him up before throwing him out, throwing gay slurs on top of him for good measure, and tells him to be back in the morning to pick up Max.

And so Hop is on his way back home when he sees Billy speeding. He pulls him over and they have a little row before Hop sees the bruises and the cut on Billy’s cheekbone and eventually he coaxes Billy into letting Hop take him to his cabin bc Billy is clearly tired and broken and very much hurt. He doesn’t wanna make him sleep in the drunk tank the night before his first day of school, so he takes him home and gives him a blanket and a pillow and threatens his life if he were to ever tell anyone about El and that sketches Billy out but he takes what he’s offered and shuts up about it.

And El is confused, angry bc “why does he come here and Mike doesn’t?”

But she sees Billy move tentatively and recognizes something of herself in him. She sees him and understands that he looks how she feels sometimes and Hop will give her a blanket and a glass of water when that happens so El does that for Billy. Sits down with him and accidentally calls him “pretty” out loud and then runs away.

It takes a while for Billy to sleep, but he does.

And when he gets kicked out or has to leave the house or whatever happens, he’ll drive out close to where Hop’s cabin is and claim it’s subconscious and Hop always takes him in bc he feels for this kid. He sees himself in this kid.

Bc Hop isn’t stupid: he can put two and two together. He’s pretty sure he saw Neil at Melvalds a couple days ago. The man reminds Hop of his own father and lord knows Hop didn’t have a great relationship with that jackass. He saw Neil and thought that man looked like the kind that got too invested in the war. The kind that believed all the bullshit the government threw up onto the country like it was going to keep them afloat. He sees his hard eyes and strong face made harder by combat but really, he sees a weak man who thinks hitting his son is the best way to show dominance.

And from the way Billy acts, Hop can tell this goes back to when Billy was a kid. No one acts like that w/o some serious damage. Hop just likes that Billy is nice to El.

In fact, he’s really nice to El. He takes a liking to her right away bc she’s always asking him questions about the world and his clothes and his hair and “what does that say?” as if he’s already her brother. And he answers like he’s already her brother. And Hop feels it in his chest, that paternal feeling of he needs a home.

And he doesn’t wanna start taking kids in like they’re dogs but he just… he can feel it. He knows this boy deserves better than what he’s getting. One day he’s hurt so much that Hop is worried about El even seeing him. It’s on Friday and fuck Hop knows the tactic. Hurt him harder Friday, let the injuries heal up before Monday. So he doesn’t walk up to school with a black eye and a bruised nose. So no one suspects.

It boils Hop’s blood. He wants to make an arrest. He wants to do something. But Billy is still a deer in headlights in their home. He still sleeps with his boots on. Hell, he’s only been around 2 or 3 times.

And when El wakes up in the middle of one night that Billy is there, crying and screaming and wailing and calming down only when Hop is there to comfort her, Billy asks in the morning what was wrong. She cites “Papa.”

And Billy asks Hop to come outside and then, when they’re both out, swings at Hop hard. Barely makes contact bc Hop sees and dodges and watches Billy stumble over the ground.

“What the fuck, kid?”

“Do you hit her?”

Hop is completely taken aback.

“What?”

“Do you hit that little girl?”

And Hop is amazed that this boy is fully ready to pick a fight with him, someone arguably much larger than him, just over his daughter. Hop asks why he would ever think that. Billy mentions the Papa comment. Hop explains that’s not him. He stumbles over his words trying to explain his relationship to El w/o explaining all of the monster shit that’s happening around here but it’s hard and he’s fed up and has to go to work so he just says:

“You shouldn’t be mixed up in this!”

Billy just yells back: “Then why did you bring me here?” angry and red and sweating bc he finally thought he found a place but now it’s lost again and so he drives himself to school in a fury. He doesn’t visit Hop anymore. and it’s good that way bc Hop is off on a journey figuring out about this town going to shit at the hands of a monster and El is leaving for Chicago and then Billy has to find Max.

But on the way he finds Steve, wandering into a junkyard, the kids on top of a bus. He gets mixed up in monster fighting and the nightmares that invade this town in the dark and he dry heaves from all of the stress. He reunites w/ Hop and El and rekindles a better relationship w/ Max and he goes back home to more abuse.

And Hop sees it, lets Billy come over even when nothing’s wrong just bc he feels better here, calmer here, safer here than he ever did at home. Hop buys Billy his own mug and starts letting him have the bed.

“I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“C’mon, Chief. You’re way bigger than me, you can’t-”

“You’re not gonna sleep on this couch any more. Take the bed, I’ll be fine over here.”

And Hop starts to learn how to father Billy, boils a little hotter with every new bruise he sees, and eventually goes through the very tedious battle of gaining custody. But it’s worth it bc now he has his hot headed son ~♥

[haloud]

maria and liz, 1x13

This scene has been a bit of a contentious one for a number of reasons, and there are a number of conversations worth having about it. But one thing that jumped out at me upon a rewatch is that the feeling among some of us that the scene has liz “choosing sides” within the love triangle isn’t actually the case at all.

The scene starts with Liz coming in and flopping over on her friend, complaining about not wanting to be an adult for a while, to which Maria hums in grim agreement and takes a drink. Then they talk for a bit about Maria’s necklace, which leads to Maria saying that Michael fixed it and now it mostly makes her think of him, which devolves into her confessing that she’s developed feelings for him. Liz says “oh my god!!” a lot, Maria tells her to stop, because Alex is in love with him.

Liz immediately pulls back and repeats “That’s...a lot” several times.

The very next thing she says is “Have you talked to Alex?”

Maria has continued to drink through this whole conversation. She replies, with her voice kind of choked up and conflict all over her face:

And then Liz says:

Hey. You can’t choose who you fall for. Love is scary--if we could choose, we wouldn’t fall at all, and...whats the fun in that? You can’t be guilty of something you can’t control.

Liz’s voice throughout is encouraging, but it’s not happy. Particularly on “what’s the fun in that,” she sounds almost sarcastic, begrudging. Liz’s own experience and the difficulty loving max has put her through over the course of the season, the way she’s both opened herself up to love and the way she describes loving max as teetering on the edge of a cliff, it’s all coloring what she says here. It isn’t as easy as one friend giving another a pep talk. It’s way heavier than that.

And immediately after, Maria swallows, whispers “Yeah,” and looks away. This is the closest she gets to a smile.

She’s trying, trying to accept Liz’s support, but the guilt she’s feeling can’t be talked away in one conversation. Nor is Liz telling her to “go for it,” to pursue Michael regardless of Alex’s feelings. Both of them recognize the difficult pressure the situation puts on their friendship. Maria is thinking of Alex when Liz walks in. Alex is the first thing Liz brings up when Maria confesses to her. No one here is trying to pick sides. All Liz is saying is that drowning in guilt isn't a healthy or helpful way to deal with the situation, or fair to herself. And she’s right.

I can imagine a scenario where Liz talks to Alex and says basically the same thing. Where he confesses to her that he pushed away the guy he loves, and that guy has started developing feelings for maria. And liz says "that's a lot. have you talked to maria?" and alex says "no, i can't, what right do i have to get in the way of her happiness, im too full of regret and what ifs and guilt" and liz says "hey, everyone makes mistakes, and you shouldn’t feel guilty. You can’t control who you love.”

Liz isn’t taking sides. She cares about both her friends, the conversation is just naturally weighted toward who she’s talking to in the moment.

And Maria stays consistent—later, when Michael comes to the Pony, she’s happy to see him (because he makes her feel cared for! Who wouldn’t be?) but still conflicted. They kiss, but after a few seconds she pulls back a little and says “We really need to…” and he knows she’s about to say “talk” and shuts the conversation down by going to play guitar.

Maria cares deeply about Alex. Whatever your feelings regarding if she’s being “selfish” by falling for Michael and kissing him despite knowing Alex’s history with him, it’s just a canon fact that Alex’s feelings have been constantly on her mind since she learned of them. When she tells Liz that her necklace makes her think of Michael now, she isn’t happy about it, she’s upset. She’s drinking, close to tears, having to drag out the words because she’s being torn up by them. Liz sees this, and tries to comfort her by reminding her that emotions like love are out of our control—not by telling her “fuck Alex, get your man.” Liz isn’t always the greatest friend, but she loves deeply and tries her best even when her nature makes her miss her friends’ emotional needs sometimes. She wouldn’t throw Alex over like that.

I’m no fan of love triangles, but if we’re being faced with one, I prefer one where the characters involved act like adults, and that’s what’s happening in this scene. Don’t bottle things up; communicate with your friend about your feelings and his. It may hurt, but no one is at fault for feelings they can’t control, and talking about it now is better than letting it fester. I hope we see more of this going forward until the love triangle plot is finally behind us.

[mother-shipper]

Right! So. Part II of this prompt because I realized the HC part never really got there. I was so focused on Steve wanting to fight Neil. [I’m not projecting, you’re projecting!]

Billy’s more or less been on a morphine roller coaster since he was admitted. He doesn’t remember those first few days in the hospital but by the time they’re weaning him off of it the swelling in his face has gone down. His clavicle and orbital bone were fractured and there were no words to describe the panic he felt when he woke up and realized he couldn’t open his mouth. 

But Steve had been there. He was quick to reassure Billy that everything was okay. He was in the hospital. He explained what had happened that night. He told Billy what he’d driven up to and was more than happy to let him know that he would never have to see Neil again. Billy tried so hard to speak but the words were muffled and unintelligible. Steve couldn’t understand him and it was so frustrating. 

“Hang on, okay? I got you something that’s gonna make this a lot easier.” Steve turned in the hospital chair and bent over the arm of it. There was rustling and then Steve sat up again, producing a dry erase board and a marker. Billy took it, scribbling something down quickly and turning it to face Steve.

Is Max okay?

“She’s safe,” Steve answered. “She’s been staying with El and Hop. Neil won’t touch her.” 

Billy’s hands started to tremble and he let the board fall into his lap. He couldn’t have stopped the tears if he wanted to.

------------

“Billy, you have to eat,” Steve coaxed, trying again to get him to take the shake the nurse brought in. Billy turned his head away from the straw. He was tired of drinking his meals. He missed food. And the stupid things were chalky and gross tasting. 

Steve sighed, setting the cup down on Billy’s tray in defeat. “I know you’re hungry.”

Billy would have denied it but his stomach betrayed him, letting out a loud rumble. He took his dry erase board and hastily scrawled on it.

Stop torturing me, Harrington!

“Seriously,” Steve laughed. “It’s a shake, not battery acid.”

Billy wiped the board down and scribbled something else. 

It tastes like the bottom of a boot.

“It’s not that bad,” Steve told him. He took a sip to demonstrate and immediately, his face crumpled. Billy raised an eyebrow at him, daring him to try and back himself up after that.

“Okay. So it’s pretty bad.” He took the cup in hand again and held it out to Billy. “But you have to drink it. So I’ll make you a deal. You finish this and I’ll make you some soup tomorrow.”

Billy didn’t budge.

“And I’ll bring you ice cream.” 

Billy considered it. Scribbled.

Strawberry?

“If I blend it and strain the seeds I think we can get away with that.”

Billy stared at the straw, sighed and reluctantly started to drink it down.

----------

When Billy was finally told he was well enough to be discharged, he practically ran from the building. He’d have to stay on the liquid diet until the wire came off in another six weeks and that really fucking sucked. But he could wear his won clothes again. He could get out of that sterile room and off the damned IV and go... Where?

Billy didn’t have a home anymore. Hop was taking good care of Max and she had her friends. Billy though? He didn’t have a safe place to go or a roof over his head. He stood in front of the hospital, holding his bag of meager possessions and completely, utterly lost. 

He was contemplating what shelter if any would take him in his condition when a familiar Beemer pulled up the the curb. Steve jumped out of the driver’s side looking frantic.

“I’m sorry. I was at the store and the line at the check out was insane. I didn’t think it would take that long.” He opened the passenger door and held it. “Come on. Let’s get outta here.”

Billy was confused. He pulled his board out of his bag.

And go where?

Steve smiled wide. “I talked to my parents. They said you can stay at my place.” Billy swiped his hand across the board. Scrawled.

For how long?

Steve shrugged. “There’s not really a time limit. I set up the guest room for you and I got some stuff I think you’ll like a lot better than the stuff they give you here.”

Billy hesitated. He erased. He scribbled. Paused. Erased again. He struggled with what he wanted to say. Steve had spent the last few weeks at his bedside, walking beside him in the halls so he could exercise, letting Billy use his walkman to listen to music so he had something to do in the sparse stretches of time when Steve wasn’t right there. Steve had come to help him. Steve had taken care of him. But Billy just couldn’t understand

Why?

Steve frowned, looking from the board to Billy’s face. He could read that Billy wasn’t being defensive or trying to pick a fight. He was confused. He genuinely didn’t understand why Steve would do this for him. Billy erased again when Steve didn’t answer. He wrote more.

I hurt you.

Steve shrugged. “We all hurt you.” Billy looked stricken by that statement but Steve didn’t stop. “The signs were there. You needed help. We let you down.”

Billy’s hand started shaking. He turned the board around to write a response but Steve laid his hands over Billy’s, stilling him. 

“We let you down,” he said again. “And I’m so sorry. Because you...you did not deserve this.” Steve wouldn’t look at him. Couldn’t. He felt so much guilt. For missing the signs. For ever putting his hands on Billy.

 “When I met you, you were a grade A asshole,” Steve said. “But that’s not who you are.” He squeezed Billy’s hand in his. “You’re defensive and sarcastic and you drive people away but you’re also this sweet, caring guy who’s been so beat down he’s afraid to feel anything. But you were starting to.”

“You were changing. Even before this, you were a completely different person than the guy who wanted to beat my ass in Joyce Byer’s living room.” Steve looked up at Billy through his lashes. Billy who looked like a deer caught in the headlights. But Steve kept going. “And the Billy that baby sat with me and sat on my couch watching shitty movies all night or bitching about my music just to get a rise outta me...I like him. I like him a lot.”

Billy still hadn’t moved. His blue eyes were fixed on Steve, wide and stunned. 

“I’m sorry,” Steve blurted. “I mean, I didn’t...this isn’t-”

Billy’s lips were warm and soft against his. It made Steve’s heart jump in his chest, even this little bit of gentle contact enough to send sparks tingling through him. Billy was kissing him. Billy Hargrove was kissing him. Steve wanted to get lost in it, to pull Billy in close and touch him the way he dreamed about for so long. But he had to be gentle. He wouldn’t let himself hurt Billy and especially not with their very first kiss. Billy pulled away, erasing the board and starting again.

You talk too much, Harrington.

Steve couldn’t help the bright, happy laugh that bubbled up from his chest. “Well maybe we can continue this...conversation...back home?”

Home. A home with Steve. Home sounded nice. They got into the car and Steve was pulling out of the parking lot when he noticed Billy in the middle of writing something else.

Do you think a “liquid diet” includes

“Don’t you finish that!”

Billy laughed. And Steve thought it just might be his favorite sound in the whole world, wires and all.