#she simultaneously loves jackie and wants her to love her

[biblicalhorror]

Sometimes I DO project lesbian fantasy goggles onto television characters. Many such cases. But not shaunajackie. Why else would they be Like That

[norrisleclercf1]

Tennessee Whiskey

Pairing: Country Singer!Reader x Lando Norris

Rating: PG-17

Words: 7.3K

Warnings: None really, just language, the dickhead known as Rhett

Requested: Yes/No

Songs: Save a Horse, Ride a cowboy by Big & Rich, Tennessee Whiskey by Chris Stapleton, Life is a Highway by Rascal Flatts, She's Country by Jason Aldean, What Hurts the Most by Rascal Flatts, All-American Girl by Carrie Underwood, Jolene by Dolly Parton, Bless these Broken Roads by Rascal Flatts, Fancy by Reba McEntire, What Ifs by Kane Brown

Synopsis: You're as smooth as Tennessee whiskey

You're as sweet as strawberry wine

You're as warm as a glass of brandy

And honey, I stay stoned on your love all the time

Some country songs just write themselves

A/N: I want to thank @monzamash for giving me the idea of how they met but also @vintaqestar for fueling this even more. And also Chris Stapleton for me listening to song and giving me the inpsiration. @bibissparkles

"Welcome to Nashville," Lando smiles brightly at the older gentleman holding his hand. 

Nashville, Tennessee. That's where Lando was currently, here for a Jack Daniel's event. He's never been to Nashville, but he is standing in the back room of a cramped yet packed bar. Jack was releasing a new bottle, a special one with McLaren on it. Fans and nonfans alike were here for the event. 

He was also told that some country singers would be there. The base was thumping, and the thick smell of smoke and alcohol had his throat tightening. Oscar was leaning against a wall, probably not wise as Lando had touched it, and it was sticky. Yet, Oscar looked the most relaxed Lando had ever seen. 

"You bunch sure know how to throw a party," Oscar voices, a little louder than usual. But with the southern drawl of some singer, a song about a tractor that is somehow sexy. "How is a tractor sexy?" Lando whispers, lips right against Oscar's ear. The Aussie turns and shrugs his shoulder. "I don't think they care, look." Oscar points to the crowd. 

Oscar was right; Lando was watching people sing and do some type of synchronized dancing. "What are they doing?" The older gentleman, whose name Lando couldn't remember, something like Dan, laughed loudly. "It's called line dancing." Oscar and Lando share a look and just shrug their shoulders. "When do we go out?" Oscar asks, but Dan waves his hand. 

"Ah hell, you ain't gonna go on stage, boys; you're behind the bar. We don't showboat out here. Unless you're like them," Dan, maybe Cash, points, and Lando looks over. He sucks in a breath seeing a woman holding a torched guitar. It was gorgeous, with dark wood, but through the low lights, it looked like fire was taken to give it this smokey look. "That's The Cadillac's. A new band, but damn, they think they're going to clean house at the CMA's." Dan yells, tipping his hat. 

Lando stopped listening, though, unable to take his eyes off the woman with the guitar. With their hair pulled back and a black cowboy hat placed on their head. Oscar looks over at what has Lando's attention and chuckles. "Hey, who is that?" Oscar asks, pointing to who Lando is staring at. "Eh, oh, that's Y/n L/n, the lead singer. Sweet, sweet girl. Born and raised here in the south, want me to introduce you two?" "Yes," "No," Oscar and Lando answer simultaneously. 

"Excuse Lando, he gets nervous meeting new people. We'd love to meet them." Oscar chuckles, and Dan smiles and pulls the two drivers over. 

"Honestly, what even is a McLaren?" Your drummer, Cassie asks, fixing her belt buckle. She earned something from Barrel Racin and would cut anyone for touching it. "I think it's a type of car, Y/N?" You whip your head up at your bassist Judd asks, poking you. "What? Yeah, it's a car, but this is for Formula 1. I said yes to this cause it's Jackie's bar. We started here, guys; just be polite." You urge knowing that Cassie and Judd tended to get in some trouble. 

"We'll be on our best behavior, ma'am." Judd tips his hat, and you just roll your eyes. "Kids!" You three turn, seeing Jackie barreling towards you with two young men dressed in Vols orange. "Y/n, this is Lando Norris and Oscar Piastri; they're the drivers for this fancy party." Jackie laughs and pats the one named Lando on the back. "Nice to meet ya'll," You stick out your hand. 

Lando mumbles back a hello but doesn't shake your hand. "Oscar," You turn, and what you assume is the oldest of the two shakes your hand. "Y/n, nice to meet ya." Oscar smiles, but you turn back to Lando and give him a small smile. "Well, um, catch ya later." You clear your throat, and Lando looks up and nods. 

"Yeah, gotta a crowd to sing to," Judd places his arm over your shoulders, and you can tell he is staring down at Lando. "And I gotta get these boys behind the bar," You wave off Jackie, smile at Lando, and nod your head at Oscar as you three take the stage. 

Lando jumps a little at the roar that builds into the building, even on the street. This place was shaking alone with just the cheer of the crowd. "Here, and don't worry about making difficult orders, just the ones with the new whiskey. You two should be fine." Dan says, or Jackie, actually. "Thanks!" Oscar laughs as Lando can't pull his eyes off the stage. 

"Hello, Nashville. Now, let's give a big warm welcome to our other half from across the pond. McLaren Formula 1 Team!" You scream; a bright light lands on Lando as people cheer, and Oscar has to nudge him to wave. "Alright, we're all here to drink but also dance, so let me introduce myself to you, lovely people. I'm Y/n, and we're The Cadillacs. We're gonna start off with a good one. So sing if you know it, dance, who cares." You laugh. 

"I've known you since Brad and Angelina

We go back like Pontiac seats

If I got an aisle with a mess I gotta clean up

I know you'll be showin' up with bleach, hmm." 

Lando smiles, hearing the opening lyrics, and people quickly move, grabbing someone to dance with as the sound of the violin and guitar complement one another. 

All those names that we don't ever speak of

Got a couple nights that have slipped my mind

Proof and photographs have been deleted

If you ever needed an alibi

'Cause dirt on you is dirt on me

And we both know our hands ain't clean

If it all blows up and we end up on the news

If you go down, I'm going down too

"Hey, can I get a whiskey sour?" Someone yells, and Lando snaps his head away from you and to the woman before him, and he nods. Lando hums along, even going as far as to tap his foot to the beat. 

It's a good thing we're each other's kinda crazy

Ain't no judgment or keepin' score

If you rob a bank, I'm your getaway Mercedes

God knows that's what friends are for

'Cause dirt on you is dirt on me

And we both know our hands ain't clean

If it all blows up and we end up on the news

If you go down, I'm going down too

If you go down, I'm going down too, yeah

"They're pretty good. The crowd loves them!" Oscar yells, handing off 3 beers, and the cowboys yell and head off, the crowd growing more with each passing minute. Like the music was drawing them in more than them. Which was probably true. 

I keep all your secrets by the dozen

You know where my skeletons sleep

Hypothetically, if you ever kill your husband

Hand on the Bible, I'd be lyin' through my teeth

'Cause dirt on you is dirt on me

And we both know our hands ain't clean

If it all blows up and we end up on the news

If you go down, I'm going down too

Our bodies are buried, and they're in the same ditch

So even if I wanted to, I can't snitch

30 to life would go quicker with you, yeah

Smiling at the crowd, you can't help but pull your attention to the bar, seeing Lando bop his head and smile brightly. You feel this lightness in your chest when you see his smile; he is adorable. But he was also gorgeous in this unique way; you could stare at him for hours. Unsure why, you're glad he was enjoying your song, which was currently snug at number 1 in the charts. 

So, if you go down, I'm going down too

If you go down, I'm going down too

If you go down, I'm going down too

You finish off the ending and sigh as the crowd roars, and you scan it and see Lando smiling and clapping loudly. You blush and look back at the crowd and then at Judd and Cassie. "Hey? One of the oldies?" You ask, knowing the crowd would love it. "Fuck yeah!" Judd laughs, knowing the next song is about your ex. A nasty piece of work. 

"Alright, one more 'cause we've got some great talent here. Now, how about a song warning men what happens when you cheat on a good ole southern girl?" You laugh seeing men groan, but the woman jumping up and down. This was the song that catapulted your career. 

Right now, he's probably slow dancin' with a bleach-blonde tramp

And she's probably gettin' frisky

Right now, he's probably buyin' her some fruity little drink

'Cause she can't shoot whiskey

Right now, he's probably up behind her with a pool stick

Showin' her how to shoot a combo

And he doesn't know

Lando's eyes snap up at you on the stage, hearing the dark rumble change in how you started to change and how you give yourself a deep southern drawl. Lando laughs as he watches you lean into the song, singing your heart out as you hit each note with emotions. Lando shudders, hating to be the guy this song was written about. 

He doesn't know how it happened, but Lando ends up singing along with the crowd and starts to jump when Cassie hits the drums and joins in on the chorus. "Maybe next time, he'll think before he cheats!" Lando yells and watches the stage go dark. "Damn, the group got a new fan?" Lando blushes when Oscar nudges him, but he just looks away. Something about you was pulling him in. 

"I sure hope so!" Lando jumps, hearing your accent right there. Damn, you looked good. Lando melted slightly with a light shine to your skin, hair a little messy, and cheeks wide from your smile. "Want some water?" Lando freezes, hating that's what he started with. You giggle and lean over the bar, not caring for the way your skin is sucked into it now. "How about a double shot of whiskey? Think ya could do that?" You ask, staring at Lando. 

"Yeah," He breathes, and you giggle, jumping back down as you watch him move behind the bar and fix the drink. "Hey, how old are you?" Oscar turns and gives a lopsided grin. "I'm 22, Lando is 24." Your eyes grow wide, hearing that Lando is the oldest among them. "Really? For sure, I thought it was you." You laugh, Lando blushing even harder. 

"Here," He slides the glass over, and you smile, taking a sip. "Damn, good whiskey." Lando chuckles and hands off some other drinks. "So, what is Formula 1?" Lando turns, and you swear you feel your chest flutter. He had gorgeous eyes that were the perfect blend of blue and green. "It's international racing," "So you travel the world? That's gotta be fun," You yell as people cheer for the next act. 

"I guess! It's tiring after a while, but we meet cool people." Lando leans onto the counter, giving you a little smirk. "Am I one of those cool people?" You flirt. Lando chuckles and looks away with a blush. "Yeah," He breathes. "Yeah, you are." Taking another sip of your whiskey, you put it down and lean in. "Good, 'cause I think you're pretty cool too." 

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"Damn, they sure know how to party." Oscar groans, rolling his neck as Lando helps you pack up. "It's the southern, just be happy football wasn't going on." Judd laughs, slapping the poor kid on the back. Oscar, much smaller than your bassist stumbles forward. "And we have to do this all over again Friday." Cassie sighs, pulling her jet black hair out of its braids. 

"Hey, if you're not doing anything, um, would you like to join us for the week?" You ask, fiddling with your fingers. Lando looks up, Oscar being pulled away by Judd and Cassie like he was a little boy. "Um, I'd have to check my schedule." He mumbles, wondering what exactly McLaren would have him do until Friday. 

"Oh, yeah, you're probably busy." You chuckle, rubbing the back of your neck. "Nope, he's not busy. As long as you have him back by Friday night, you can keep him." Lando jumps, seeing Jon there all of a sudden. "Where'd you come from?" Lando squeaks, feeling bashful as if a parent just caught him doing something he shouldn't be doing. "The hotel and Miss. L/n, whatever you want to do with him, go crazy." Jon smiles and slaps his hands down on Lando's shoulders. 

"Well," Lando can see your confidence inflate again and smiles, feeling himself grow comfortable. "How about showing this Brit the southern life? We're going back to my ranch upstate; how about it?" You ask, leaning against a speaker. Lando thinks it over, though he wants to say yes immediately. "Yes, I'd love to." Your smile grows so that even your cheeks puff out. 

"Great, I might want to say your goodbyes now. There is no cell service in those parts. Real nice," Lando pulls out his phone and hands it to Jon. "No need for cell service when you've got no phone." Judd laughs and tips his hat. "I like you," Lando nods in agreement, and Jon makes a noise. "Just tell Zak, well, I don't know, but tell him I would get injured." "Yeah, we won't have a pretty boy here riding horses," Cassie calls, and Jon looks between you and Lando. 

"Alright, just be careful." Jon waves Oscar over, who gives Lando a thumbs up and out of the bar. Lando chuckles and turns, balking when Judd is staring at him. "You stick out like a sore thumb." Judd muses, ruffling his dirty blonde hair. "Hey, Y/n, pretty boy here should change, don't you think? Or else those fans of him will totally notice him." You haul up your guitar and look him over. 

Black joggers, a bright neon papaya sweatshirt, and black sneakers. "Do you own jeans?" Lando nods, but Cassie snorts. "Not skinny jeans, like wranglers or something?" She walks around him, checking him out. "Um, no?" "Well, we hit Broadway and get him a new fit." Judd muses, and you blush; Lando would look good in a cowboy hat. 

"Come on," You finish loading everything up and watch the trunk pull off, leaving you four outside. Lando follows you, but you reach back and lace your fingers together. "Careful around here. Drunks and others won't hesitate to pickpocket ya. So, stay close." Lando doesn't even bother pulling his hand away, loving the weight of yours in his. "In here," Judd shoves you 3 into the door and laughs when you stumble into the store owner glaring but stop seeing who it is. 

"Judy boy!" "What up, old man? Think you can do a makeover here for our boy!" Judd points behind him, and the owner looks him over. "Of course, bring him here." Lando doesn't know what happened, only that he's shoved into a room and returned wearing a black t-shirt, cowboy-cut jeans, and perfectly fitted black cowboy boots. "Now, the hat." Judd muses, and you giggle, sitting on a stool. 

"Lookin good," Lando turns and stutters, seeing your hair free. Wow, he was awestruck by you, hat off, and he finally got an honest look at you. "Pretty," He whispers, and Cassie snorts but muffles it when Judd glares her. "Hey, Bud, add in some orange, will ya'? It's um, shit, forgot your name, pretty boy." Judd laughs, and Lando can't help but join in. "Lando," You and Lando say at the same time. 

You look away when Bud starts to make the hat, and Lando can't help but turn to you. "What got you into singing?" You look up and smile, and Lando knows that smile. It was the smile of someone who remembered their first time falling in love. "My daddy, he was a farmer. I'm the oldest, so he'd wake me up, and we'd check the fields together. Every morning before school, no matter the rain, sun, or cold, it didn't matter. It was hard work, but he'd have this little radio. He'd turn it on, and we'd sing together. Some of the best memories I have are with that old bugger." You smile, looking down. 

"Does he come to your shows?" You take a deep breath and clear your throat. "No, not anymore. He passed about 3 years ago." Lando curses himself, but he stops seeing your soft smile. "He's not in person, but I have him onstage with me for each show. The guitar I got?" Lando nods, knowing the one; it looked old but was a gorgeous piece. "He gave it to me, same as my hat." You jump off the stole and rock forward to lean on the counter. 

"Almost done there, Bud? We gotta long drive home," You yell, and Bud just curses you, but you giggle and bump your shoulders into Lando's. 

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"Wakey, wakey," Lando groans, feeling something wet touch his face, and he pats it away. "Lando, come on, you gotta wake up." "Mhn go away Osc," Lando hears Oscar tsk and kicks him, rolling off the bed with a screech. "What the hell, mate!" Instead of Oscar, all 6'4 of Judd stood a very shirtless Judd. "Breakfast will be gone soon; it's better to go eat. Then we can go," Judd leaves the room, and Lando turns, seeing the large Bluetick Coonhound named Rusty staring at him. 

"Don't drool on me, please," Rusty opens his mouth and barks loudly, with Lando chuckling, "Yeah, yeah, alright." Lando stands and moves, staring at the new clothes given to him. Sliding in jeans and a t-shirt, he threw on the baseball cap and walked out barefoot. "Good morning," you sing, and Lando sighs; he could get used to this. 

"Judd said we're going somewhere?" You turn and smile. "We're going fishing." Lando makes a disgusted face that has Cassie spitting out her coffee. "Oh shit, if he makes that face again, I'll piss myself.' Cassie cackles, which has Judd chuckling as well. "Scared of a little fishie?" "They're disgusting." You shake your head as Lando shivers. 

"Really? You at them just fine last night." Slapping your spatula down, you see Judd with a blank face. "Judd," You hiss, "Hey, don't pass out, pretty boy," You turn and gasp, seeing Lando whiter than white. "Lando, he's joking. We didn't fish last night. It's just a joke." You plead and help him sit down on a stool. "Promise? Promise that wasn't fish?" He asks, eyes wide, and you bite your bottom lip. "I promise that wasn't fish." You explain; great, now you'd have to lie about what Bass was for the rest of his life. 

"Shit," Judd chokes into his mug, and you glare at him. "Go take the dog out," You hiss and watch as Judd takes Rusty out. "Don't you have something to do as well? You've already eaten." You point to Cassie, who looks up and groans. "But, I want more." She whines, and you huff, "It's for Lando and me. Now go." Cassie huffs and shoves on her boots and stalks off outside into the cool air. 

"Was it really fish?" Lando asks, and you look down. The poor boy's lips were swollen from chewing on them, and his eyes were wide. "No, it wasn't fish. Judd was just fucking with you." You giggle, trying so hard to not laugh. "Good, 'cause last night was good, but if it was fish, ugh." Lando sticks out his tongue, and you turn back to ensure you didn't fire the bacon. 

"Okay, well, how about getting me the orange juice. Coffee?" You ask, pointing at the pot, and he shakes his head. "Don't drink it; I'll take the juice, though." He opens the fridge and grabs it, pouring two glasses. "I'm glad you know how to cook, I suck at it." You snort on a laugh and flip the bacon. "I'll teach you how to make eggs." Your grandma would always tell you someone needed to know how to cook at least one thing. "I'll burn the house down." But you roll your eyes. "I highly doubt that." 

"Now, grab me four eggs," You point to the cart. "Crack them open into that bowl and then scramble them." You instruct. Lando cracks them open but stops staring at them. "Do I shake them?" You laugh, plate the bacon, and turn the eye down. "No, take that fork and stir hard, but not too hard. You get them everywhere." You instruct and go to the oven and take out four fluffy biscuits. 

Lando nods and stirs the eggs, and you watch, ensuring he doesn't make a mess. "Perfect," You wipe your hands and turn the eye of the stove back on. "Now, come here." Lando walks over, and you giggle. "With the eggs, Lando." "Right, knew that," He mumbles and grabs the bowl, and you place him in front of the stove. "Next step, pour the eggs in. Some spray the pan, but I just finished cookin bacon, and the grease will add extra flavor." "Jesus, this one meal will fuck up my diet." "Stop," You pinch his side, and he yelps, but you both start laughing. 

"Okay, pour the eggs," Lando does as you say, and you grab a plastic spoon and hand it to him. "wait a minute. then take the spoon, pull the eggs off the ring of the pan, and start bunching them up, and then like you were stirring them, it'll break them up." You explain and watch as Lando does as you say. "Stop, that's perfect." You take the pan, add fresh eggs to the plate, and smile. "And there you go, you just made eggs." Lando smiles brightly and leans forward but stops and pulls back. 

Clearing his throat, he smiles and grabs your plates. "Where, too?" He asks, and you point outside, cursing yourself for thinking he would kiss you. You two just met; why would he do that. Pushing the screen door open and hearing the comforting snap of it, you groan. "Woooo, that was painful," You turn and see Judd leaning on the counter. 

"Fuck off, Judy," But it had no bite to it. "Hey, just sayin, but he was going to kiss you." Judd winks and walks off, heading somewhere deep into the cabin. Rolling your eyes, you grab your orange juice cups and see Lando sitting on the outside bar, watching the sunrise. "This is wish when I had my phone, to take pictures of this." You set the cups down, sliding into your own chair. "No, you don't. It's stuff like this you don't want your phone for. Just enjoy." You grumble and bite into your eggs, and Lando shrugs. 

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"I thought you meant fishing on a boat?" Lando groans, trudging through the woods. "Hell no, a bunch of tourists are here, and this is a secret little place Y/n and I found as kids. So be nice. We don't tell anyone about this place." Cassie yells back, and you giggle at Lando's long sigh. "Why'd you bring the guitar?" Lando asks you, seeing the soft cover hanging off your back. "Sometimes, being out here gives me good inspiration." Lando hums and sees Cassie and Judd stop. 

"Finally," "Nuhuh, pretty boy. You and Y/n are going further up." Judd boops Lando's nose, who whimpers and hangs his head. "Aren't you supposed to be an athlete? Where's that stamina?" Judd teases. "I'm not built to dig around the southern woods, much less in these temps." "Stop your complaining and go," Judd shoves Lando, and you two walk further from there. 

"They're fishing; we're just going to relax upriver. Or did you really think we'd make you fish?" Lando thinks it over and then sees you're not carrying fishing poles and that Cassie and Judd had most of them. "Oh, didn't even cross my mind, honestly." Smiling, you lead the way and stop seeing the clearing that has the river in front of it. "Hey, Whiskey, tell me we can stop now." Lando groans, and you turn, confused at who he is talking to. "What?" Lando looks up and stops. "Whiskey, it's your nickname. Since the first thing that got you and me talking was whiskey." You're glad your face is already flushed, or Lando would see the giant blush covering your entire face. 

"Oh, uh, ahaha yeah, we can stop here." You place your guitar down, fluff out the blanket, and grab bug spray and sunscreen. "Come here. You'll cook like cornbread in a cast iron." Lando turns with confusion on his face that has you smiling. "You'll burn Lando. Come here so I can put sunscreen on you." You explain as he shrugs off his shirt. "Shit," You whisper, and his eyes cast up. "What? Something wrong?" As he spins around looking for something. 

"Wha, oh no, nothing, here." You hand the sunscreen to him, looking away from him. Lando takes it and smiles as he sprays everything on you. Removing your top, he easily applies it to you as well. 

You don't know how much time passes under the southern sun, but the soft breeze makes it bearable for you and Lando. "What are you writing?" His voice was smooth, like the wind was barely touching you. "A new song," You reply and scratch out some words. "Well, I figured that, Whiskey, but I meant, what exactly are you writing?" Lando rolls over onto his stomach, hands under his chin as he looks up at you through his lashes. "Oh, well, it's something new. I doubt the fans would like it." You comment, fixing the guitar settled on your knee. 

"That I doubt. I don't usually listen to country, but if from the songs I've heard from you if this new song is anything like the ones I know, people will love it." Lando smiles, smile brighter than the damn sun. "Yeah, well, Rhett would disagree with you there." You snort, "Whose Rhett?" Lando sits up now, eyebrows bunched. 

"My ex, he's a bull rider. Cassie's older brother," You add on, and Lando rolls his eyes. "Well, Rhett is a jackass." You giggle and look at him. "You don't even know him," "I know he clearly didn't support you. Your new song will be awesome. Play it for me." Lando scoots closer, and you lean back, unsure if you should. "It's different," You whisper. 

"Different is good. It heals the soul sometimes. Now, play." Lando demands, eyes boring into yours. "Fine." You grumble and peel the guitar off your sweaty knee onto your lap. "It'd sound better with my electric guitar, okay, just don't judge." You warn, but Lando shakes his head no. "I'd never judge you, Whiskey." 

Okay," You take a deep breath, strum the first couple of strings, and start singing the words. 

Used to spend my nights out in a barroom

Liquor was the only love I'd known

But you rescued me from reachin' for the bottom

And brought me back from bein' too far gone

You're as smooth as Tennessee whiskey

You're as sweet as strawberry wine

You're as warm as a glass of brandy

And honey, I stay stoned on your love all the time

I've looked for love in all the same old places

Found the bottom of a bottle's always dry

But when you poured out your heart, I didn't waste it

'Cause there's nothin' like your love to get me high

And you're as smooth as Tennessee whiskey

You're as sweet as strawberry wine

You're as warm as a glass of brandy

And honey, I stay stoned on your love all the time

When you finish, you sigh and look at Lando, who is staring at you. "Ugh, god, I knew it! This song sucks. Listen, there is supposed to be a guitar solo, and I probably won't even give it my record. Ugh!" You yell and flop back, squinting at the sun. "That was," you brace yourself for the lashing for how different it wasn't you or the image you were giving the world. It was different, and people would stop listening to you and the band. 

"THE BEST SONG EVERY" "What!" You sit up as Lando launches himself at you, pushing you back down and hovering over you. You swallow hard, focusing on his chain dangling around his neck. "Whiskey, that was fabulous. You have to give your record label that song. And finish it; I want to hear all of it, promise me." He pleads, and you nod your head as he pulls off you; sitting up, you blink, trying to control the urge to devour his lips. 

"Oi! Love birds, time to go in. Can smell the rain coming!" Lando hops up and nods as you just quietly pack up your guitar. Lando walks past, but Judd stops you. "Do I need to kick his ass?" He whispers, and you shake your head. "No," "Then what's wrong, Y/n?" "He believes in me," Judd lets his hand slip, and you walk off, leaving your friend smirking. 

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"Ugh, I'm stuffed. Seriously, tell me what this is." Lando gives Cassie and Judd puppy eyes, but they just share a look and quickly snatch all the plates. "Nope," Lando deflates and groans, and goes over to the radio and turns it up slightly. The storm and music make a perfect blend. You four were out under the tin roof of the large porch. It was about 12 ft by 12ft and had a built-in fireplace. 

It was where your grandpa would come and pick with his band, and now, where you sit and do the same thing. You swear, sometimes you can still hear that damn banjo or violin. You lean back in your rocking chair, the same one he sat in and taught you how to play, Lando coming up and sitting beside you. 

"Friday is in 4 days," He whispers, and you clear your throat, hating the thought of Lando leaving. "I know, and it's probably best we get there early." You reply, tightening your hand on the beer bottle. "Teach me how to dance." You turn, shocked by the change of subject. "Judd told me you're taking me to some get-together and that there will be line dancing. So teach me." You blink at him and sigh, "I don't know how to." Lando chuckles and stands. 

"Okay, then just dance with me." Lando holds his hand out to you, staring at you, gently lacing your fingers together. Lando tugs you up, and you quickly melt together as you don't listen to the music. Just the way his hand holds yours and the weight of his arm on your waist. "Screw it," You whisper and place your head on his shoulder, nose brushing his neck. "I have to leave for Begas after Friday's event." "Be quiet." Not wanting to hear about him leaving. 

"Whiskey, I don't want to leave, but you know," "Lando, just dance with me." You whisper, effectively making the Brit snap his mouth closed. 

"Judy," Cassie whispers and gently pokes Judd, who groans and opens his eyes. "What," He grumbles and yawns stretching. "Think it's about him?" Cassie whispers, and Judd turns his head and sees you and Lando dancing more to the pounding sound of rain and thunder. 

"What's about him?" Judd reaches over, snatches Cassie's opened beer, and sips. "That song she's writing, the one she stopped. I bet it is; she's never really experienced love." Cassie whispers, and Judd rolls his eyes. "Yeah, I wonder whose fault it is." Cassie flinches, knowing her brother Rhett really fucked you up, something she regrets every day. 

"He's different." Judd looks over and watches as Lando kisses your forehead softly and closes his eyes, leaning more into you. "I sure hope so; I'd hate to bury him in the backyard." 

-----------------------------------------

"It's loud in here!" Lando yells, which has you and your friends laugh. "Seriously? You had us buy a race and listen to real F1 cars, and you say this is loud?" You yell in his ear, Lando's arm tightening into your side. "Yeah, well, we get earbuds!" Lando screams, fixing his cowboy hat. A black one with an orange string tied around it. Other than that, it looked average. Judd had picked out Lando's outfit, reminding you why you loved your best friend so much. 

Lando was wearing a white button-down with a couple of buttons undone to show off his various necklaces and had black jeans paired with it; they hugged his thighs and ass so perfectly that even Cassie stared. He wore the cowboy boots you bought for him, and you giggled; he looked a little silly with the hat, but he loved the hat and refused to go without it. 

"Now, can we dance?" He points to the line dance. It was to the song Country Girl by Luke Bryan, and you laugh, shaking your head no. "Hell no, I'll trip." Lando chuckles as Judd ushers you to your booth and makes you and Lando sit inside. "Okay, but just once, dance like that! Promise?" You just nod in agreement even though you were dreading the thought. 

It was 2 hours of Lando begging and getting 2 dances in with Judd and Cassie that you stood, and his eyes lit up. "I'm getting us another round." Lando deflats but nods and kisses your cheek. Jolene by Dolly Parton comes on, and you run to the bar smiling and breathless. "Hey, can I get 2 beers and a double shot of JD?" The bartender turns and nods their head. 

"Still drinking like a man huh?" That voice, that voice still had your body freeze up. Fuck, what was he doing here? He was supposed to be in Texas for a competition. "What? Not going to turn around?" You shudder and turn, coming face to face with your ex, Rhett. "Rhett," Breathing out his name felt like fire on your tongue. "If it isn't my sweet baby, missed me?" He asks and leans against the bar. "Fuck off," You turn to leave, not even caring for the drinks anymore. 

"Now, now, sweets. Come here. Still trying to act like that tough girl when we both know you're still that little girl inside." He hisses, tightening his grip on you. "Let me go. I'm here with someone." "Really? You aren't wearing his hat." 

Judd looks over, wondering where you could take so long and tense. "Fuck, Cassie, goddammit. Your brother is here." Cassie's eyes pull away from the blonde girl beside her, and she groans. "Dammit," Cassie groans and pulls away from the girl and stands. "Whose that?" Lando asks, hearing not the best. "That would be my dickwaffle of a brother, Rhett. Y/n's ex." Lando feels anger course through his blood. "Yeah, well, you know that 2nd song we sang at the party?" Judd asks, taking off his hat and fixing his rings. "Yeah, the one about the cheating?" Lando asks, "That was about Rhett," Judd adds, and Lando moves quickly to your side. 

You feel a presence beside you and suddenly feel the heavy weight of a hat on your head. "Now, she's wearing my hat. Now let go of my girl, right now." You turn, seeing Lando and sag into his side as Rhett drips his hand. "Really? This little boy? Oh, how your taste has fallen," Rhett gets in your face, but Lando effortlessly shoves Rhett back and pushes you behind his back. 

"The only little boy I see here is you, you shriveled 2-inch dick. Get the fuck out of here," Lando seethes, and you have to smother your laughter as Judd steps up behind you and Lando easily towering over you both. Rhett blanches, knowing Judd would easily slaughter him. "Whatever, enjoy my leftovers." "I do, and I eat her out every night." Lando spits without thinking twice. You blush and move, hugging his back as you hide your face. Lando moves, covering your hands with his one large hand. 

"Mr.Norris, I think you've earned yourself a dance." You whisper, causing Lando to spin around and smile. "Really? Well, let me do the honors, darlin'." You laugh at his fake accent. "So bad," You laugh as he tugs you into his arms, leading you to the dance floor. "Stay there!" You yell and run up to the DJ booth. Lance watches as you lean over, and he's never been happier about you wearing tight jeans and a loose top. You looked damn good. 

Running back over, you keep Lando's hat on your head and see everyone clearing out, and the people who enjoy line dancing come back out. "Aight, this one is for our special guest, Miss. Y/n L/n herself," A roar surrounds you two as you turn and wave and turn to Lando. "Judd taught me this one when we were teens, so just don't judge. "This song is for you," You hear the familiar DumDeDeDum, DeDeDumDeDeDum, DeDaaDaaaaa DumDeDeDum, DeDeDumDeDeDum, DeDaaDaaDaaDaaDaaaa feels your ears and Lando whips his head to you. 

"Are you serious? You know this song!" And Lando gets a cheeky smirk on his face. "Remind me to introduce you to Daniel one day." Rolling your eyes, the heavy guitar beat hits, and you tell Lando to follow your movement. Stepping forward and then back, Lando moves with you. 

Well, I walk into the room

Passing out hundred dollar bills

And it kills and it thrills like the horns on my Silverado grill

And I buy the bar a double round of crown

And everybody's getting down

An' this town ain't never gonna be the same

With the lyrics, you laugh and step side and then jump and turn, shuffling your feet forward like a horse walking. Lando laughs, head back as he does it as well. 

'Cause I saddle up my horse

And I ride into the city

I make a lot of noise

'Cause the girls they are so pretty

Riding up and down Broadway

On my old stud Leroy

And the girls say

Save a horse, ride a cowboy

Everybody says

Save a horse, ride a cowboy

Getting to the chorus was always your favorite part. Hearing the line, you take off the hat, as does every other female, and some guys swing the hat around and stop. Lando laughs but you stop him, "Only those that ride do that part." Lando's eyes widened, and you smirked, glad you could catch him off guard. "I think I've got it now." He yells. 

Well I don't give a dang about nothing

I'm singing and Bling-Blinging

While the girls are drinking

Long necks down!

And I wouldn't trade ol' Leroy

Or my Chevrolet for your Escalade

Or your freak parade

I'm the only John Wayne left in this town

And I saddle up my horse

And I ride into the city

I make a lot of noise

'Cause the girls they are so pretty

Riding up and down Broadway

On my old stud Leroy

And the girls say

Save a horse, ride a cowboy

Everybody says

Save a horse, ride a cowboy

You and Lando dance as his arms wrap around you, and you two do the moves in sync as he catches on quickly. "Save a horse, ride a cowboy!" You two scream, and you swing the hat and pull him close, Lando leaning in to kiss you, but you pull back, kick up your right heel, and go back to the moves. 

I'm a thourough-bred that's what she said

In the back of my truck bed

As I was gettin' buzzed on suds

Out on some back country road

We where flying high Fine as wine

Having ourselves a big and rich time

And I was going, just about as far as she'd let me go

But her evaluation of my cowboy reputation

Had me begging for salvation all night long

So I took her out giggin frogs

Introduced her to my old bird dog

And sang her every Wilie Nelson song I could think of

And we made love

"Does that mean I'm your thoroughbred?" Lando jokes, but his voice reaches a deeper tune, and you turn, smirking. "Why? Wanna be?" You ask, making the moves backward as Lando pulls you in. 

And we made love

And I saddled up my horse

And I ride into the city

I make a lot of noise

'Cause the girls they are so pretty

Riding up and down Broadway

On my old stud Leroy

And the girls say

Save a horse, ride a cowboy

Everybody says

Save a horse, ride a cowboy

What? What?

Save a horse, ride a cowboy

Everybody says

Save a horse, ride a cowboy

Lando leans in, and so do you; this time, there are no interruptions as Lando captures your lips, and you melt into him. You never understood some country songs about love, having thought you might experience it with a true southern boy like Rhett. But who would've thought you'd feel it was some Brit. "Save a horse, ride a cowboy," Lando whispers, pulling away, and you giggle. "Earn that belt buckle first, big boy, and then we'll see." Lando bursts out laughing, a high-pitched, gasping one that makes you laugh hard as the beat fades. 

------------------------------------

Lando stands in the bar, the same one just a week ago, and you two stand in your same spots, but this time you don't wear your daddy's hat; instead, you're wearing Lando's and possibly the white dress shirt from last night. "Is that your shirt?" Oscar asks, and Lando turns and shrugs but knowing damn well it was. 

"It sucks we won't be able to see them again?" Lando tunes it out. You and he talked about it last night. And you both knew that this could work; besides, he was your country song, and you his Whiskey; you two weren't goin nowhere. "Yeah right; JD was so damn happy with their show they invited them to their private booth for Vegas," Jackie yells, and Lando smirks and moves through the darkness. 

You yelp when cold hands touch your skin, and you turn, smirking when you see those sea-green eyes you love so much. "So Vegas, uh?" He asks, and you sigh rolling your eyes. "Yeah, Judd wants to go." "Really not to see me?" "Okay, maybe you too." You tease, and Lando nods and leans in, kissing you gently before pulling. 

"So, how about it's only fair you spend a week in my world now?" You think it over, wrap your arms around his shoulders and nod. "Only fair," "Yeah, only fair." You muse and hear gagging beside you and turn, glaring at Cassie, who is wearing round pink-tinted glasses. "You two make me sick. Bad enough, we heard you all last night; now we gotta see this?" Cassie groans while Judd cackles. 

"Leave the kids alone, grandma. They're in love." "What'd you just call me?" Judd yelps as Cassie smacks him hard with her drumstick. Turning back, you face Lando. "Tell me your coworkers aren't like this?" Lando laughs nervously and shrugs. "We're totally fucked," Lando and you giggle as you hear Jackie yell loudly, introducing you 3, bringing back a sense of deja vu. 

But you knew the cute Brit behind the bar was coming home with you this time. "Go kill it, Whiskey." Running onto the stage, you smile into the bright spotlight. "Alright, we're starting off with something new. It's called Tennessee Whiskey," 

[thisismeracing]

Falling (in love) | LH44 (Patreon Exclusive)

read the full piece here

― Pairing: stepdad!lewis x kindergarten teacher!reader (she/her) ― Warning: mentions food and sickness (fever); single!mom reader; family issues; not been proofread yet; 3k words. ― Summary: When your kid found a new friend in his new school, you did not expect that would mean you would find yourself friends too. And sure enough, you weren't expecting to fall for his friend's uncle.

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preview

A lot of things were unexpected that day.

First, the fact that Lewis was late to pick up his niece, but when he got there she wasn’t throwing a tantrum, quite the opposite. When she saw him she saw him, she came running through the school’s entrance with the biggest smile on her face when just earlier that week she made a fuss to go to class every morning – before and after getting there. 

The second was the smallest boy who was right behind her. His backpack swung from side to side, while Wendy ran up front turning every few seconds to giggle at him.

And just when Lewis thought those were the only two unexcepted things, you walked out of the door carrying a few books in your hands and a big bag on your shoulder, calling for Wendy and the smallest boy. 

“Uncle Lew!!!” His niece screamed before barreling into his legs and hugging him. He chuckled, bending down to kiss her mop of curls. “Have you met Leo?” 

“I don’t think so,” he shook his head just as the boy finally reached them. 

The kid’s version of a black Jordan and the styled curly hair made Lewis smile, that boy appeared to be around five but was already starring a fashion sense that a few older people hadn’t.

“Leo, you’ll give me a heart attack one of these days. You can’t go out running like this, honey,” your voice carried a serious but sweet tone simultaneously. 

Lewis’ eyes found you standing a few feet away, curly hair clipped away from your face by a few strands, a pencil skirt, and a cream blouse. The folder and books in your arms gave him a hint of what you were doing there, and his silent guess turned out to be true when Wendy turned with a toothless grin and introduced you: “This is Miss Yn, our new teacher!” She took a step to stand beside you looking up with a beaming face that reflected yours. “And this is Leonard, her son, my new classmate. They’re new here, can we introduce the city to them like we did with Jackie and Uncle Toto? Also, can we have playdates later? Can we go to the park? Can we–”

****

“Mamma, I don’t wanna eat,” Leo held his hands behind his back giving you his best puppy eyes and you chuckled. 

“How about you try a few bites and then go play with Dee, huh?” 

“Yeah, champ, you gotta make your body strong so you can run as fast as you can,”  Lewis tried, already cutting a sandwich in half for Wendy. “Have you ever tried vegan sandwiches?” He asked and Leo shook his head.

“I don’t like lettuce, mamma does though,” he shared, pointing his small finger at you.

“What do you mean you don’t like lettuce? Lettuce is exactly what makes us run even faster, it gives us tons of energy!” 

“It does?” the curly-haired boy asked, hands now on the side of his body and curious eyes watching the food in Lewis’ hands. 

“Yeah, I eat it all the time so I can drive my car in endless circles.”

You smiled watching the interaction. 

“How about you have a bite? You don’t have to eat it all, just a bite. But I bet you will want to finish it. This one has so many things that make us bigger and stronger.”

“Strong like you?” his big brown eyes now looking at Lewis’ biceps, and you chuckled at your kid's face when the driver curled his arms and flexed his muscles. 

“Yeah, strong just like me!” 

****

“They truly made a bond in a short time, huh?” You commented.

“Guess we’ll be seeing each other a lot more often,” Lewis bumped your shoulder with his and you smiled. You wouldn’t lie that the prospect of interacting with him more than you did the last week wasn’t a bad thing at all.

“I’m not opposed to that.” 

“Neither am I.” 

────── ⋆🪩 VOICEMAIL: Hi! I hope you guys liked this lil sneak peek! Make sure to like and reblog if you did *mwah* and PLEASE, LET’S INDULGE IN THIS UNIVERSEEEE BECAUSE I'M ALMOST SURE THIS WILL BECOME A SERIES OF SOME SORT. I sorted a few ideas for "chapters" yet, but I won't be following the chapters format, but rather taking asks requests about them and publishing the blurbs and pieces <3

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[jfk555]

Alright I know we love to make fun of Jackie for quoting a movie during their breakup scene and then denying it immediately after because yeah that’s fucking loser behavior (affectionate) but I want to talk about how Jackie just. Can’t come up with an insult so she has to take it from Beaches because she can’t find any cruelty in her own subconscious.

It’s simultaneously so sweet and heartbreaking because Jackie loves Shauna so much she can’t really conjure negative things to say about her but also Shauna says cruel things to her so easily that that must sting even more. And Shauna obviously didn’t mean it but STILL. Jackie doesn’t know that and she died thinking Shauna hated her when that’s not even close to the case-

[empressmcblondie]

Just some Yellowjackets thoughts. I am currently working on a potential paper about the Shauna ear consumption scene, and I have watched 2x01 an obscene amount of times. I thought I'd share something interesting I have noticed (it may have been discussed before). During the first hallucination scene, Jackie and Shauna play MASH and Jackie tells Shauna that she'll live in New Jersey, become a stay-at-home mom, and be married to Jeff. Shauna laughs and dismisses it by saying she doesn't "want to talk about the future" and she's all about "living in the moment." In the continuation of this scene, Jackie tells her that if she doesn't want to "dig into the future" that they should "talk about the past" instead and makes a joke about the whole 'haunting' thing. This establishes--for Teen Shauna--the beginning of her complicated relationship with temporality. A relationship which we as the viewers already know develops well into adulthood and does not spare any of the adult counterparts. In general, the simultaneous backwards and forwards moving timelines (i.e., we're trying to get to the pit girl moment in the 96' timeline, but also moving we're forward with the adults, but none of the adults have actually left the wilderness and are exhibiting clear signs of regression, so we're experiencing everything all at once rather than chronologically) is a fascinating topic in and of itself, but this is not what I wanted to talk about. We see the MASH game that Jackie and Shuna played in that hallucination scene during 1x06 as well, when Shauna is visiting Jackie's parents. Shauna goes into her bedroom, picks up Jackie's journal and goes through page by page. Eventually, we see that it is the same exact page with one missing detail. In the 2x01 version, there is a twirl in red pen on the left page, whereas in the 1x06 version, it is absent (see pictures for comparison).

Jackie's Journal in 1x06.

Jackie's Journal in 2x01.

This could be an unfortunate continuity error. Either way, this is clearly supposed to represent the same journal. This could mean one of two things:

Jackie brought a journal with her on the plane, and this is an old MASH game that she and Shauna played in the past and Shauna is simply reliving it in a hallucinatory state.

Truthfully, given that there has been no indication that Jackie did bring a journal, and Shauna is the only character affiliated with this type of writing (and writing as a whole), I think this might not have been Jackie's journal at all. Which leads to the next point:

2. The Journal is Shauna's. We know that Shauna kept multiple journals from her time in the wilderness. We also know that during her hallucinatory state, even though "Jackie" was writing, it was actually Shauna who was doing all of the actions. This means that at bare minimum, this one page was Shauna's doing... But if we take this thought to the extreme, then it is possible that Shauna wrote her own version of Jackie into being during the two months that Jackie had been dead. It could also suggest that all of the other things in that journal are Shauna's depiction of Jackie, and not Jackie herself. I think this puts a really interesting twist on this idea of consumption, expanding it beyond the physical cannibalization of Jackie's ear and subsequently her body, but really show Shauna not just playing with Jackie, but becoming Jackie. Obviously, she later marries Jeff and lives the life she believes was supposed to be Jackie's but that's quite an explicit example of this. Not sure what I think about this, all I know is that it's raw and painfully intimate. Anyways, I would love to hear what you guys think.

[sassylegshayne]

marry me, idiot. - chapter five

holy shit this chapter is nuts and kinda long but we have a lot to get through so I'm sorry?? idek what I'm apologizing for but whatever lmfao 🫶💓 enjoy!! mwah xx 3.1k words!!

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Everyone noticed it the next day. You and Spencer worked beside each other in complete silence. Josh felt on edge as he sat at his desk across from the two of you, the lack of chatter in the background of his editing was very weird.

You decided to give Spencer space, he would tell you how he felt whenever he was ready to. You respected his boundaries, and he respected yours, and that was the problem.

Kiana wanted to tear her hair out by the end of the week because the two of you still hadn't fucking talked about everything. She's been stuck listening to both of you complain about just how much you miss each other and couldn't bring herself to do anything about it.

Jackie's hopeless romantic heart couldn't take it, she's was right under Kiana for your number two supporter. Jackie and Kiana had planned a brainstorming lunch in Friday, determined to help you two get together.

The hope was that you two would admit your feelings, fall even more in love, and live happily ever after, but if you're just friends again, it'll do.

Jackie had presented an idea that made the woman across from her squeal in excitement. Kiana quickly set up a reservation as Jackie planned out just how she'd word her texts to you.

As soon as you had arrived home and parked, a message rang through your phone, the notification causing you to panic momentarily, your silence so suddenly interrupted for the first time in a while.

You didn't expect to be this lonely without Spencer. You had expected something, but you didn't think it would be this bad. You hadn't realized just how much time you spent with him until you were without it.

"hey, Ki's been super busy and I really wanna throw her a surprise b-day dinner at Buca's tn at seven if you can make it!"

Kiana and Jackie sat in their respective apartments, chewing their nails in anticipation for responses as Spencer received the same message as you.

The girls' facetime call felt silent as Jackie watched the both of you begin typing simultaneously, an eye roll well deserved before you both agreed, causing the women to cheer in excitement.

You rubbed your face, groaning as you agreed. Spence and you could put things aside for Kiana, it wouldn't be fair to her if your declined just because Spencer would be there.

Of course he would be there. It'd almost be weirder if he wasn't there. Honestly, if he didn't show up a piece of your group would be missing.

You took a deep breath before heading inside and getting yourself ready, pushing thoughts of Spencer to the side. Kiana was your priority tonight.

You'd been so wrapped up in all of this mess that your best friends birthday had slipped your mind, usually it was your forte to plan the gatherings, but it completely slipped your mind.

Ki's birthday was three days away, but Monday's are always packed for everyone, so dinner tonight, and you would bring her a cake and do a whole thing at work. Plenty of time to plan.

Spencer adjusted his grip on the steering wheel once more as he pulled into the last empty parking spot, letting his forehead rest against the wheel as soon as he shifted into park. His palms had been sweaty and shaky since he'd texted back Jackie earlier.

His nerves were set on high alert as soon as he'd finished reading. He has to be there for Kiana, no matter what was going on between the two of you.

He'd almost reached out and asked your for a truce on the night, but he's not even sure what he'd be calling a truce for. Both of you having long forgotten why you weren't speaking, but both of you were too nervous to break it.

It seemed like the universe wanted to give you a little nudge when you look up from your phone, your eyes meeting Spencer's across from you.

A smile splays across his lips and quickly disappears, replaced with a tight-lipped smile as he offers you a curt wave, getting out of his car quickly.

Your grip on the door handle tightens as you exit your own vehicle, trying your best to bite your tongue, afraid of what you might say.

Your former best friend.. former? Current? Who fucking knows anymore?

Spencer falls in stride silently beside you, your head tilted toward the ground, eyes watching as your feet fall into a rhythm, steps synchronized. It was hard to separate yourself from someone when they become that intertwined into your life.

Your hands brush ever so slightly as you approach the host stand, a small smile across your lips.

"Hi, we have a reservation under Jackie Uweh." Spencer offers, his smile matches yours as he fidgets with his hands, mindlessly picking at his cuticles with his hands stuffed into his pockets.

He didn't know what to do in this situation. His hands are normally on your hips, or his fingers intertwined with yours, so the air between the two of you sat awkwardly, uncharted territory for the both of you.

You're quickly led to the table, your brows furrowed in confusion as the hostess grabs two menus, throwing your look over your shoulder at Spencer out of habit as he mirrors your look. The two of you sit with quiet thank you's as the menus are placed before you, the table clearly not big enough for anyone but the pair of you.

Realization sets in as you adjust yourself in the booth a bit more than necessary, your heart racing as you avoid Spencer's eyes as long as you could.

But eventually, you find yourself looking up from the menu, your eyes finding his glowing blue eyes already gazing upon you, drinking in every detail.

Spencer thought he might tell you everything he's ever wanted to, until your waiter gives a bubbly introduction, noting the recent engagement between the two of you.

Your cheeks burn as you bashfully thank her, your fingers fidgeting with the simple band on your finger, a habit you'd recently noticed. Yot quick to order, throwing on the appetizer you and Spence normally split as well, a smile tugging at his lips.

You settle your hands into your lap, smiling brightly as Spencer chews his lip, his voice barely audible.

"Hey."

"Hi." You smile, a weight lifting from your shoulders as you slump into the seat, sighing in relief. Spencer laughs a bit, fiddling with the napkin in his hands as he finds himself relaxing. Your laughter mixing with his like music to his ears.

He missed this so much, every part of it. He missed his lips pressed lightly to your skin, the softness of your skin as you brushed hair out of his eyes, the blush on your cheeks each time he looked at you.

Spencer knew he couldn't make it through this dinner without teling you everything, now he just had to accept that.

It was time to throw everything he had at you, no longer concerned with holding back if he was going to confess. So he shook himself a bit before reaching across the table, taking your hands into his.

Your eyes trailed from your hands, up Spencer's arms, detailing every tattoo you wished you could trace until you meet his eyes. You were glad to be seated, worried your legs would buckle under your weight right now.

You were always flustered by Spencer, but this was on a whole new level. Butterflies danced about your stomach as your heart raced, you felt like you could pass out from sheer excitement as you squeeze his hands gently.

"I can't go without you for that long again, that sucked ass." You laughed softly, smiling as Spencer nodded in agreement.

"I never realized how little talk to anyone else, my phone hasn't died at work once, either." You grinned, ducking your head down in embarrassment. You had a bad habit of sending Spencer tons of stuff while seated next to him, rapidly draining his battery.

"I don't want it any other way, Y/N, don't worry." He was quick to soothe you, knowing that you might mistake his admiration for anger. He thought it was the cutest shit ever.

"Spencer, I don't wanna go another day without talking so can you please tell me what was wrong the other day?" You bargained, brows furrowed as you tilted your head at him.

Spencer stiffened, his hands leaving yours as your drinks and appetizer arrived, the relatively slow night allowing for quick service.

You smile as you slide a small plate in front of Spencer. Your waitress is quickly behind, happily taking your entree orders before disappearing back into the kitchen.

The moment was lost as you two grabbed bites of spicy shrimp and fried calamari, but the tension remained clear. Your hands brushed a few times as you made small talk, unaware of when the next interruption should come.

"Okay," Spencer began, noting your waiter preparing to take the order of a large party, taking his opportunity when he could. "Listen, I'm sorry didn't tell you sooner, I want you to know that I really regret that."

You nodded slowly, encouraging him to continue as you sipped your wate, unsure as to where this could lead.

"You're my best friend' Spencer grinned, sighing softly as you reddened once more, his heart racing as he wiped his palms on his pants. "You know that. You mean the absolute world to me, Y/N. You're the person I really do wanna spend the rest of my life with."

"Tve spent years by your side now and wouldn't trade it for the world. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me." He took a deep breath, smiling softly as his heart pounded in his chest.

Being in love with you has been the easiest thing in his life, it just feels so right, so perfect. Now all he could do was hope that you felt the same.

"I'm in love with you, Y/N." Spence spoke, biting his lip, eagerly awaiting your response. He felt like rything in his life had brought him to this point, even with the gentle push, or shove, from his friends.

You open you mouth to speak, your eyes wide and mind still reeling as your best friend sat before you. This wasn't a day you'd ever expected to see, and Spencer seemed so calm about it.

"It's all cool if you don't feel the same, I promise, dude." Spence spoke right as you were about to begin, causing you to chuckle nervously.

Spencer felt like there was a spear in his heart as you laughed, he was prepared for rejection but that was brutal.

You lean across the small booth, placing your hands lightly on Spencer's cheeks as your lips meet his.

The kiss is short and sweet, but the years of sparks were there. Everything you had ever wanted and more.

You're caught off guard by quick movements behind Spencer. A server rounds the corner, your own following behind with a soft smile.

Please don't walk this way... fuck.

You settle back down, smiling softly as Spencer meets your eyes with a dopey grin, slumped back into his seat. You kick his foot gently beneath the table, laughing as your waiter approached.

Spencer's mind was left in shambles, as was his heart. You didn't say it back, but you kissed him. You fucking kissed him. He had never been more confused and thrilled in his life.

As you open your mouth to speak, a plate is set before you, a smile whine leaving you as your face falls. You didn't want to wait, you wanted to say it back, but doing so over a view of your server's arms wasn't the right time.

The both of you were polite yet curt as you assured the server that you two would be okay, no refills, no cheese, thank you so much, oh my gosh will she ever leave?

Spencer was honestly still very surprised with the set up from Kiana and Jackie; pulling one over on the both of you deserved recognition. Granted, you were both extremely focused on each other, the outside world in a fog.

"You talk too much but I'm in love with you, too, Spencer." You grinned, the words tumbling from you as soon as your privacy had returned, your heart racing as you stared at him.

Spencer froze like a deer in headlights as he looked up to you, fork and knife resting upon his lasagna, prepared to take a bite. He was quick to set down his utensils, shufling a bit in his seat as he coughed a bit.

This was the best case scenario that he still didn't see coming. Spencer had assumed for so long that you loved him, just not in the same way. It was throwing him off to even think that you could.

"You do?" Your brows furrowed, laughing softly as Spencer questioned you.

"Yes, I do. I love you so much, dude." He grinned as you spoke, his eyes sparkling. "I love everything about you and have for a really, really long time."

Spencer nods, the grin unable to leave him as he takes his time to process everything. You've loved him for a long time, so what are the odds that you two fell in love around the same time?

If he could go back in time and kick his own ass, he would. There's no telling where you'd be right now, if only he'd told you sooner.

You felt like you could run for days with all of the excitement and nervousness coursing through your body. Everything was tingly as your hand met Spencer's, fingers intertwining as your heart raced.

"Okay:" Spencer chuckled, nodding as he finally spoke, unsure of where to go from here.

"Yeah," You nod back, laughing as you began to eat. "I'm happy."

The awkwardness was something new. Everything between the two of you before had been natural and felt fine, but there was a new, different air of tension hanging between the two of you.

The dinner continued on with lots of giggling and blushing, your small touches that had gone previously dismissed where now front and center in your mind.

Spencer was touching you every chance he got; his hand holding yours, brushing your hair out of your face, his knees endlessly bumping into yours beneath the table.

It felt like the first time all over again, Spencer knew he's set himself up to fall in love with you all over again. Everything felt different, everything felt new.

"So," You began as you dug your spoon into your shared chocolate cake, mentally comparing it to Josh's. "Do we tell everyone or do we keep this a secret?"

A grin immediately spread across Spencer's face and you could practically see the lightbulb going off above his head.

"Let's keep it a secret until the wedding." You set your fork down, slowly nodding as you finished your bite.

"Well, that certainly is an idea, Spence." You chuckled, covering your mouth. Definitely doesn't hold a flame to Josh's.

"I actually think that could be fun, but if we fold, we fold, okay?" You placed your elbow on the tabletop, pinky poised as you stared down your... boyfriend? Undecided.

Spencer nodded eagerly, grinning as he wrapped his pinky with yours. "We can be friends, at least, right?"

"Yes, obviously we can go back to normal but I guess.. yanno, couple stuff can stay in private." You laughed as you spoke, your cheeks burning brightly as your eyes darted everywhere. You quickly dug for another bite as a way to keep yourself quiet.

It was a strange territory for both of you. Neither of you had ever expected to be here, especially with the circumstances surrounding it, so navigating it was difficult.

"Okay, so we are a couple." Spencer stated, though it sounded more like a question. He took his turn at blushing as you nodded eagerly, a grin across your face.

"Yeah, we're pretending to be engaged, actually engaged, and secretly dating. I think it's pretty simple." You laughed, as Spencer nodded.

"I'm sorry, that's on me." He held his hands up in defense as you two dug back into the cake.

The office seemed to have a strange air when you arrived the next morning. Saturday's were normally pretty empty, most shoots wrapped earlier in the week, and videos prepped well ahead of the weekends.

The usual small group of cast and crews were there; Josh sat at his desk, headphones in as he edited an upcoming video for the Games' channel featuring Shayne and Spencer.

You smiled as you settled into your seat, your eyes glancing to the clock. It was second nature for you to be early. It was far less stressful than being late.

Spencer, on the other hand, strolled in fifteen minutes late, two coffees in hand as he sat beside you. You finished editing the audio of a particularly loud scream of Shayne's, thankful for the excuse to remove your headphones.

You sighed, setting them aside as you smiled at your boyfriend. Your best friend. Spencer. Holy shit, your best friend is your boyfriend, holy fuck.

It was obviously going to take you quite a while to get over all of the butterflies, if you ever do. Finally getting what you've yearned for for so long was definitely weird, but you could get used to it.

He grinned at you, leaning in as he presses a soft kiss to your forehead, setting your cup before you.

"Hi, love" You smiled, taking a sip as Spencer chuckled softly. As you turned to him, you caught sight of Jackie strolling very, very slowly past the open office door.

Jackie waved, grinning brightly. The two of you reluctantly wave back, you tried your best to hide your giggles.

You shot her a playful glare as she froze for a moment. Spencer turned to look over his shoulder, a disappointed look across his face.

She raised her brows, offering two thumbs up. You finaly broke, laughing as you nodded your head, mirroring her pose. You glance to Spencer to find him shaking his head with a furrowed brow.

You shove his shoulder softly, laughing as he turns back to you, a grin across his face.

"I think she got the message."

[deadpresidents]

Burial At Sea: The Odyssey of JFK's Original Casket

It was approximately 1:00 PM when a man called Vernon B. O'Neal of O'Neal's Funeral Home and asked for the best casket that O'Neal had available.  The man on the phone, simultaneously calm and tense, needed the coffin quickly and O'Neal had a slight problem.  Of the 18 people who worked at O'Neal's Funeral Home, 17 of them were out to lunch.  After all, it was a beautiful Friday day for November in Texas.

O'Neal picked out a solid-bronze coffin with white satin lining tagged at a sales price of $3,995 from his storeroom and waited for three more of his employees to return from lunch.  The bulky Handley Brittania casket from the Elgin Casket Company weighed over 400 pounds when it was empty and O'Neal certainly couldn't lift it into his Cadillac hearse by himself.  Once he had it loaded, he rushed to Parkland Memorial Hospital on the most important delivery of his career.

The man who had ordered the casket, Clint Hill, was a Secret Service agent and less than an hour earlier he had climbed on to the back of a moving limousine to try to get to the subject he was charged to protect.  He was unsuccessful.  The casket was for the President of the United States, John Fitzgerald Kennedy.

When the casket arrived at Parkland Hospital, O'Neal was met by agents from the Secret Service and some of President Kennedy's aides.  They helped O'Neal push the coffin into the hospital and down a corridor towards Trauma Room One where the President had been officially pronounced dead just minutes earlier.  One of the President's aides and the doctor who had just worked on Kennedy tried to distract the President's grieving wife so that she wasn't anguished further by the sight of the coffin that her now-dead husband was about to be placed in.  

Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy refused to turn away and begged to be let into the Trauma Room to see her husband once more.  The doctor didn't want her to see anything else, but Jackie insisted, telling the doctor "How can I see anything worse than what I've seen?" and pointing out that "His blood is all over me!"  The doctor let her in the Trauma Room as O'Neal wheeled the casket inside and she placed her wedding ring on JFK's finger before retreating back to the outer hallway once again.

Vernon O'Neal was horrified when he saw the condition of the President's body.  Blood was everywhere and a gaping wound exposed brain matter which was seeping out of John F. Kennedy's head.  Not wanting to damage the beautiful and expensive casket that he had picked out for the President, O'Neal and several emergency room nurses went to work.  The bottom of the inside of the coffin was lined with a plastic mattress covering and the President's body was wrapped in a bed sheet.  The nurses went even further and spent 20 minutes carefully wrapping President Kennedy's head in numerous white bed sheets so that blood didn't seep through and stain the lining of the casket.

After Kennedy's body was placed in the coffin, preparations were made to leave Parkland Hospital and take the President back to Air Force One at Dallas's Love Field so that they could transport him back to Washington, D.C.  As the Secret Service and the President's aides (many of whom were longtime, close friends of JFK) wheeled his casket towards the exit, they were stopped by Dr. Earl Rose, the medical examiner for Dallas County, Texas.  In 1963, it was not a federal crime to kill the President of the United States.  Because of this, there was no federal jurisdiction for John F. Kennedy's murder -- only local.  Despite tsxxxshe scale of the crime to the nation, it was technically just another murder in Dallas, Texas on November 22, 1963 (because of the laws at the time, on a purely legal basis, the murder of Dallas police offer J.D. Tippit about 45 minutes after Kennedy's shooting was a far more serious crime than the President's assassination).   Because of this, Dr. Rose informed the men escorting the President's body that they needed to leave it in Dallas.  Rose noted that he needed to autopsy the body before they took it anywhere.  To Dr. Rose, a homicide victim was a homicide victim and he had a job to do.

The Secret Service was incredulous and President Kennedy's loyal aides were even angrier.  In the corridor of Parkland Memorial Hospital, things got tense.  Rose found himself in a shouting match with the Secret Service and some of Kennedy's aides.  Even the doctors at Parkland sided with the Secret Service and pleaded with Rose to release the body so that they could take the President back to Washington.  A justice of the peace arrived, with the power to overrule the medical examiner.  But he didn't.  The justice of the peace said that Kennedy would have to be autopsied in Dallas and ensured the Secret Service that it wouldn't take any more than three hours.

Again, tempers flared and the men in the hallway at Parkland were close to fisticuffs as the medical examiner, Dr. Rose, literally blocked the casket's path with his body in order to keep it inside the hospital.  When the President's close aide, Kenny O'Donnell, appealed to the medical examiner and the justice of the peace for compassion for Jackie Kennedy and an exception for this case so that they could return the dead President to Washington and get Jackie out of Texas as quickly as possible, the justice of the peace, Theron Ward, refused.

"It's just another homicide as far as I'm concerned," said the justice of the peace.  

O'Donnell lost his temper, "Go fuck yourself!  We're leaving.  Get the hell out of the way."

With that, the Secret Service and all the President's men pushed forward.  The medical examiner, the justice of the peace, and several Dallas policemen were forcibly shoved out of the way by Secret Service agents who were ready to draw their guns, if necessary.  Jackie Kennedy was close by, her hand softly guiding the President's bronze casket as it was removed from the hospital and placed in the hearse which raced en route to Love Field and Air Force One.

When the entourage arrived at Air Force One, they found a plane completely encircled by heavily armed Secret Service agents.  The plane’s powerful engines were running, ready to lift off at any moment and push Dallas and everything that happened there behind them as quickly as possible.  Fearing the unknown and suspecting a possible conspiracy to decapitate the entire government, the shades were drawn down over the windows throughout the aircraft in order to protect against any further possible attacks.  On the plane was Lyndon Johnson, soon-to-be sworn in as the 36th President of the United States, and awaiting the arrival of Jackie and the body of the deceased President.  The Secret Service and the President's aides struggled with the extraordinarily heavy casket as they maneuvered it up the steps to Air Foce One and into a holding area in the back of the plane cleared out by removing two rows of seats.

Jackie remained with President Kennedy's casket from almost the entire time she boarded Air Force One until it landed at Andrews Air Force Base near Washington.  The only exception was prior to the plane taking off from Dallas when she stood -- still wearing her blood-stained pink Chanel dress -- on one side of Lyndon Johnson as he took the oath of office as the new President, his hand resting on JFK's book of Catholic missals, which had been found in JFK's private cabin by aides rummaging for a Bible for the oath-taking ceremony.

For four hours, Air Force One flew in a dark cloud of sadness towards the nation's capital.  New President Johnson made numerous phone calls, including calls to the slain President's mother, Rose, and brother, the Attorney General Bobby Kennedy.  In flight, LBJ also hastily made preparations for meetings upon landing in Washington.  In the back of the plane, a silent vigil was held around John F. Kennedy's casket by Jackie and the President's aides, who were so close to Kennedy that they were often referred to as the "Irish Mafia".

President Kennedy's personal physician, Admiral George Burkley, suggested to Jackie that JFK's body be taken to Bethesda Naval Hospital upon arrival in Washington for the autopsy.  Jackie showed great compassion herself on that terrible flight.  She insisted that Bill Greer drive the vehicle carrying the President's casket to Bethesda.  Greer was grief-stricken and apologetic during the flight because he had been driving JFK's limousine in Dallas and made no attempt to speed up or take evasive maneuvers when shots were first fired.  Greer felt partly responsible for President Kennedy's death and Jackie wanted to show her confidence and appreciation in his service to her late husband.

When Air Force One arrived at Andrews Air Force Base after dark on November 22, 1963, Bobby Kennedy rushed on to the plane and directly to Jackie to comfort his sister-in-law, blowing past President Johnson and snubbing LBJ as the new President attempted to offer his condolences to JFK’s devastated brother.  The dead President's aides and Secret Service detail rebuffed a military casket team who arrived to remove the President's coffin from the plane.  Instead they formed a personal honor guard and handled Kennedy’s casket themselves, awkwardly placing it on to a catering lift and lowering it to the ground so that they could place it in a waiting Navy ambulance from Bethesda.  Jackie, with her husband's blood still clearly visible on her bare legs, and Bobby climbed into the back of the ambulance with JFK's casket and drove straight to Bethesda as President Johnson made a statement for the millions of Americans watching the arrival ceremony on live television.

The motorcade transporting the body of President John F. Kennedy from Andrews Air Force Base to Bethesda Naval Hospital for his autopsy arrived right around the same time that President Lyndon Johnson's helicopter landed on the South Lawn of the White House from Andrews so that the new President could take the reins of the government of a nation in shock.  As trusted members of his "Irish Mafia" helped to remove Kennedy's casket from the Navy ambulance, Jackie Kennedy and RFK headed upstairs at Bethesda where private suites were set aside for their comfort and friends and family were waiting to help with the comforting.

Across town, the new President prepared to charge into his new duties.  During the flight home from Dallas, Lyndon Johnson had summoned Cabinet members, diplomats, Members of Congress, current White House aides, former White House aides, and anybody else who had any inkling of what powered the Executive Branch, to meet him at the White House upon his arrival for consultation, directions, and mutual support.  Upon arriving at the White House, Johnson briefly spent a moment by himself in the Oval Office before leaving and walking with aides to the neighboring Old Executive Office Building.  LBJ didn't feel right with immediately setting up shop in the Oval Office just hours after President Kennedy's death.  Instead, Johnson decided to use his Vice Presidential office in the OEOB for the meetings he planned on holding that night.

Before those meetings began, however, President Johnson took a moment for a brief pause in his frenetic assumption of the Presidency.  Requesting a few minutes of privacy, LBJ sat down at his desk in the OEOB and wrote two short letters which became the first pieces of correspondence of the Johnson Administration -- letters which the young recipients couldn't even read yet:

"Dear John--It will be many years before you understand fully what a great man your father was.  His loss is a deep personal tragedy for all of us, but I wanted you particularly to know that I share your grief--You can always be proud of him.  Affectionately, Lyndon Johnson" "Dearest Caroline--Your father's death has been a great tragedy for the Nation, as well as for you at this time.  He was a wise and devoted man.  You can always be proud of what he did for his country.  Affectionately, Lyndon Johnson"

The casket containing the father of those two young children had been wheeled into the hallways leading to Bethesda Naval Hospital's morgue.  Despite the fact that this was being done in a completely secure, private, inner sanctum of the famed military hospital, the casket was that of a man who had started the day as Commander-in-Chief of the United States Military.  Out of respect and duty, an honor guard lifted the coffin from a gurney and carried it through the halls and into the brightly-lit, antiseptic autopsy room where doctors prepared to examine the lifeless body of the 35th President of the United States.

When President Kennedy's casket was opened, it became readily apparent that the hard work of Vernon O'Neal and the nurses at Parkland Hospital in Dallas to protect the inside of the expensive coffin was unsuccessful.  The makeshift bandage which had been carefully wrapped around Kennedy's head did not prevent seepage after all.  Blood soaked through the sheets which made up the "bandage" and the inner lining of Kennedy's ornate casket was obviously damaged.  It was a surreal, eerie sight in the autopsy room as John F. Kennedy was removed from his coffin and placed on the stainless steel autopsy table at Bethesda.  The 35th President was naked and seemed to be in remarkably good physical condition for a 46-year-old man who was known to suffer from serious health problems.  Most shocking for those in the room during the autopsy, however, was the fact that this seemingly young and vital President who had inspired a new generation was now very much dead with a massive gunshot wound to the head that exposed the part of his brain still contained within it and left the top of his skull jaggedly disfigured with missing pieces of bone and flesh.  Kennedy's eyes were fixed open, staring vacantly into space with dilated pupils that could no longer envision ambitious goals for his nation.  The mouth which formed his famous words, framed his most inspirational messages, and spoke that unmistakable Boston accent now hung open, forever silenced and permanently paralyzed in a final expression which seemed to mirror the mood of the entire country:  a combination of shock, pain, horror, and perplexity. 

The pathologists who performed John F. Kennedy’s autopsy finished their work shortly after midnight on November 23, 1963.  Photographs and drawings were taken of Kennedy’s body during the autopsy, and when the autopsy was finished, morticians from one of the capital’s finest funeral parlors arrived on the scene.  A team from Gawler’s Funeral Home entered the autopsy room at Bethesda Naval Hospital to embalm the President and attempt to make him presentable.  The casket that brought JFK back to Washington from Dallas would not work.  While the casket from O’Neal’s was a beauty from the exterior, the interior was a mess.  All of the safeguards attempted by O’Neal and the Parkland nurses in Dallas were not quite enough to protect the inside of the Handley Brittania from the gruesome wound that had killed the President.

The question many might have is why would there be such a need to make John F. Kennedy’s remains presentable when JFK was obviously in no condition to be viewed?  Why couldn’t they simply close that beautiful Handley Brittania casket that was purchased in Dallas and bury Kennedy in the container which carried him back to Washington?  

At the orders of Jackie Kennedy, aides went to the Library of Congress in the hours after President Kennedy’s body returned to Washington, D.C. and researched the historic, iconic, epic state funeral of Abraham Lincoln – the first American President to be assassinated, almost exactly a century earlier.  Kennedy’s funeral preparations would be steeped in tradition and either perfectly replicate or closely mirror the funerals of other fallen American Presidents including Lincoln, James Garfield, William McKinley, Warren G. Harding, and Franklin D. Roosevelt.  As information about these past Presidential funerals (along with the funerals of famous Congressional and military leaders throughout United States history) was brought forward, one constant was apparent:  in almost every case, the fallen leader was viewed by a grieving public in an open casket display.  For many Americans, streaming past the open casket of a former President or American military hero was an opportunity to pay tribute, look upon the face of a fallen hero, and find closure in another storied chapter of American History.

Yet, as much as Jackie wished to replicate Lincoln’s funeral, she was dismayed at the thought of an open casket for John F. Kennedy.  Jackie had seen what the assassin’s bullet had done to her husband.  As Kennedy’s motorcade raced to Parkland Memorial Hospital in Dallas minutes after the shooting, Jackie wouldn’t allow doctors and Secret Service agents to remove President Kennedy’s body from the limousine until an agent covered Kennedy’s head with his suit jacket, shielded the President from the view of others, and preserved some of the dignity that was so important to the Kennedy image.  As the morticians from Gawler’s worked on JFK, Jackie once again expressed her wish that her husband’s coffin would be closed.  Bobby Kennedy, however, didn’t think that the decision was up to the family.  RFK felt strongly that JFK belonged to the people, too, and that the American people would want their opportunity to say goodbye.

Following his assassination in 1865, Abraham Lincoln’s remains embarked on an epic, 20-day-long train trip that retraced the route he took to Washington in 1861 prior to his Inauguration.  In major cities throughout the Northeast and Upper Midwest, hundreds of thousands of Americans turned out to pay their respects to their “martyred” President.  Embalming was a relatively newly-mastered American art at the time of Lincoln’s death – a technique which had been much-improved upon and much-practiced during the Civil War when young men frequently died far from home and families looked to preserve their fallen loved ones so that they could have one last look at them before they were laid to rest.  

However, even today, embalming can’t guarantee perfect preservation for an extended amount of time.  In 1865, there were definitely some worries about Lincoln’s extended, national funeral.  After all, the warm weather of spring had started throughout the United States and Lincoln would be honored with open casket viewings by Americans in well over a dozen cities between Washington, D.C. and Springfield, Illinois in the twenty days after his death.  Some people worried whether it was appropriate to view Lincoln’s corpse at all considering the fact that he had died from a gunshot wound to the head.  Lincoln’s wound was far less devastating visually than Kennedy’s.  The bullet that killed Lincoln had entered his brain, but did not exit Lincoln’s skull.  The only damage visible was a black eye from bruising of the facial bones close to where John Wilkes Booth’s bullet had lodged in Lincoln’s brain.  Undertakers accompanied Lincoln’s body on the funeral train back to Springfield and as time passed, they certainly became necessary.  Lincoln’s face blackened considerably by the time his remains reached Springfield – partly from the facial bruising, partly from the dirt and dust of twenty days exposure to the elements, but also partly due to the beginning stages of decomposition.  At some cities, the undertakers who accompanied Lincoln home would brush his face with chalk to make him more presentable to the citizens who came to pay their respects.  In a few cities, it also became necessary to surround Lincoln’s casket with fragrant flowers and spray the area with heavy perfumes for reasons that I’m sure aren’t too difficult to surmise.

John F. Kennedy was not going to be viewed by the public for twenty days in over a dozen cities throughout the country and the funeral industry had made even larger strides in the century since Lincoln’s death.  However, JFK was severely disfigured by the bullet that killed him.  Unlike in Lincoln’s case, the bullet that tore through Kennedy’s skull and brain also exited his head, causing major damage that would be difficult for even the most-skilled mortician to disguise.  The team from Gawler’s were perhaps the best in the business, but it wasn’t simply a matter of brushing some chalk or cosmetic makeup on Kennedy’s face to cover up some bruising or minor discoloration.  Entire pieces of JFK’s skull were missing and parts of the President’s head needed to be synthetically reconstructed.  The morticians also had to pack his skull with cotton and Plaster of Paris in the place of his brain -- parts of which were removed during the autopsy and other parts of which were in countless places including (but not limited to) the fabric of his wife’s Pink Chanel dress, the windshields of the motorcycle cops escorting his motorcade in Dallas, the backseat and trunk of his limousine, and all over Dealey Plaza in Dallas.

The mortuary team from Gawler’s took over three hours to work on President Kennedy, clean him up, dress him (in a bluish-gray pinstriped suit with a white shirt, black shoes, and blue tie with dots), place him in a brand-new casket and put a rosary in the hands of the nation’s only Catholic President.  A little after 4:00 AM, President Kennedy, his widow and Bobby Kennedy arrived at the White House after a solemn motorcade through the darkened streets of Washington.  In the first nod to Lincoln’s funeral, JFK’s flag-draped casket was carried by an honor guard into the East Room of the White House and placed on a replica of the black catafalque that Lincoln’s coffin once rested on.  After Kennedy’s casket was situated in the East Room, Jackie Kennedy and Bobby Kennedy entered the room and asked that the lid be opened.  Both Jackie and Bobby were exhausted and emotionally drained, and Jackie was still wearing the Pink Chanel dress that she had cradled her dying husband’s head in.  The front of her dress was smeared with the dried blood and brain matter of the President.  As ghastly as the sight was, Jackie continually refused to change, noting that she wanted everyone to see what “they” did to her husband.  As the casket lid was opened, Jackie snipped a lock of her husband’s hair with scissors and turned to Bobby, saying, “It isn’t Jack” – once again alluding to her wish that the casket remain closed.

Jackie left the East Room and headed upstairs to the White House Residence to finally change her clothes and attempt to sleep.  In the East Room, Bobby remained near his brother’s coffin with a couple of friends, close aides, and Secretary of Defense Robert McNamara.  The stoic RFK – always much tougher than his older brother – was a wreck by this point, after attempting to stay strong and supportive throughout the night for his stunned sister-in-law.  Bobby had not yet looked at JFK’s remains.  To finally make the decision about whether or not JFK would have an open casket, RFK took a look at his brother’s face.  When he saw Jack in the coffin, RFK immediately agreed with Jackie’s feelings, “She’s right.  Close it.”  While the team from Gawler’s had done an admirable job of repairing the massive trauma to the President’s head, JFK was virtually unrecognizable as the man he once was.  To those who saw his body as the casket was briefly open in the East Room early that morning, it was apparent that the American people wouldn’t want to remember their fallen President in that way – as if he were a wax museum knock-off of the real John F. Kennedy.  The funeral ceremonies over the next few days would all be closed casket and the nation would remember JFK as the young, lively, inspirational President that he had been for so many Americans.

••• Since the assassination of John F. Kennedy in 1963, there have been so many unanswered questions and theories and allegations.  Many are the result of sloppy work on behalf of the government in the hours following the shooting, during the autopsy, after the autopsy, and in the failure to protect the suspected assassin, Lee Harvey Oswald, as he was being transferred to a new facility to face charges of murdering President Kennedy and Dallas Police Office J.D. Tippit.  Evidence has been lost or misplaced, and some records remain sealed until 2017 – 54 years after the assassination and 100 years after JFK’s birth.

There is one aspect of this story that received some closure, however, and that is what happened to JFK’s original casket – the expensive Handley Brittania coffin that Clint Hill ordered from Vernon O’Neal’s Funeral Home in Dallas in the hectic minutes after President Kennedy was pronounced dead.

After JFK’s autopsy at Bethesda Naval Hospital and the hard work by the mortuary team from Gawler’s Funeral Home to make him presentable, President Kennedy couldn’t be placed back in the beautiful but bloodstained bronze coffin that had carried him home from Texas.  Gawler’s had brought with them to Bethesda another elegant casket fit for a President – a $3,160 Marsellus 710 coffin that was crafted from “hand-rubbed, five-hundred-year-old African mahogany”.  It was that flag-draped casket from Gawler’s that John F. Kennedy, Jr. saluted and Americans saw being laid to rest in Arlington National Cemetery.

The history of Vernon O’Neal’s casket did not end that night at Bethesda when President Kennedy was transferred to a different coffin.  Gawler’s Funeral Home took possession of JFK’s original casket after they placed him in the undamaged casket that their mortuary team had brought to Bethesda Naval Hospital following Kennedy’s autopsy.  Whether it was as a morbid souvenir or simply due to confusion about what to do with it, Gawler’s stored JFK’s original coffin in a warehouse in Washington, D.C.  In January 1964, less than two months after JFK’s burial, Vernon O’Neal submitted a bill to the federal government for $3,995 for the casket that Secret Service Agent Clint Hill ordered in Dallas and JFK was transported to Washington in.                 

The government felt that O’Neal’s bill was “excessive”, particularly since he had merely delivered the casket to Parkland Hospital in Dallas and had not performed any other funeral services such as embalming, chapel services or transportation of mourners.  O’Neal lowered the price by $500, but the government still had an issue with the $3,495 price tag.  What Vernon O’Neal actually wanted was the casket itself.  O’Neal had received offers of $100,000 by parties interested in collecting and displaying the casket as a unique relic of the slain President.  For the Kennedy Family – still reeling from the assassination and its aftermath – the last thing they wanted was a spectacle surrounding a bloodstained coffin that JFK had spent just a few hours in.  At the family’s urging, the federal government paid O’Neal (he received $3,160 for his services on November 22, 1963) and the General Services Administration took possession of the object in 1965.

In September 1965, the House of Representatives passed a bill which required the government to preserve any objects related to the Kennedy Assassination which might contain evidentiary value.  Several days later, Representative Earle Cabell from Texas sent a letter to Attorney General Nicholas Katzenbach (who had replaced Bobby Kennedy at the Justice Department a year earlier).  In his letter, Congressman Cabell suggested that the casket had no value for anyone other than “the morbidly curious”.  Since the Kennedy Family “did not see fit to use this particular casket in the ultimate interment of the body”, Cabell felt that it was “surplus” material owned and controlled by the federal government.  To shut down those who might be “morbidly curious”, Cabell recommended that the casket “be declared the proper property of the USA and, as such and in keeping with the best interest of the country, be destroyed.”

The Kennedy Family agreed with Congressman Cabell’s sentiments and Attorney General Katzenbach ensured everyone that the casket had no evidentiary value, no good reason for display or storage, and that it was the property that the government had the right to dispose of in whichever way it sought fit.  On February 18, 1966, several members of the Air Force picked the casket up from a secure building at the National Archives just a few blocks from the White House.  The casket was placed in an Air Force truck and transported to Andrews Air Force Base – the very place that the casket had originally landed in Washington with President Kennedy inside of it less than three years earlier.  At Andrews, the Air Force team from the 93rd Air Terminal Squadron loaded the coffin on to a C130 transport plane.

To dispose of the casket, the Air Force had decided to take it to a place that JFK had once considered being buried:  the Atlantic Ocean.  Kennedy loved the sea and was said to have considered being buried at sea when he died.  Of course, we know that Kennedy was buried at Arlington National Cemetery instead, but for many reasons, the Atlantic Ocean was the perfect place for the disposal of the casket that had brought him back to Washington following his assassination.

The Air Force wanted to ensure the integrity of the casket and not allow it to become a souvenir by someone who happened to come across it floating in the ocean or washing up on the shore.  The C130 flew about 100 miles east of Washington, D.C. and descended to about 500 feet above the water.  Before taking off, the Air Force had drilled over 40 holes into the casket and filled it with three 80-pound sandbags.  It was also secured inside of a wooden crate and sealed shut in a manner so that it wouldn’t break apart upon hitting the water.  

At approximately 10:00 AM, the C130’s tail hatch was opened and the casket was pushed out of the aircraft.  Parachutes softened its fall and the coffin began to sink instantly.  The airplane circled the drop zone for about 20 minutes to make sure that the coffin didn’t resurface, but they had no reason to worry.  The Air Force had chosen an area of the Atlantic that saw very little air or sea traffic, and the casket settled in about 9,000 feet of water.  The Kennedy Family was relieved that they no longer had to worry about a bloody casket going on display somewhere for the “morbidly curious”.

[yellowjacketslesbian]

Reasons you should be watching Yellowjackets as a lesbian:

Let’s start with the obvious, shall we, the canon lesbian ship (VanTaissa). Which includes a masc/butch lesbian and a lesbian of color! Like we love to see the representation! Their relationship also feels authentic in a way rarely seen in media. Their scenes really shine with the underlying playfulness of young, first love.

Did I mention they’re played by an openly nonbinary lesbian actor and a queer actress in the 1996 timeline and Taissa in 2021 is played by another queer actress! And the cast has been allowed a lot of involvement in making their characters stories even more authentic (though the show runners and writers already do an amazing job).

Speaking of their story, one of my favorite things about the show is that their relationship and queerness isn’t treated as an obstacle to overcome, as it is many times in media. In fact, relationship is really a source of joy and strength for both characters when they’re stranded in the wilderness. Also, it should be noted that both of the lesbian characters have well developed storylines and motivations beyond their relationship.

And in 2021 we learn that Taissa grew up to have a beautiful family with her wife (who isn’t Van) and get to watch her campaign for state senate as an out lesbian. Enter the internal conflict of wanting to root for Taissa’s marriage in 2021 while simultaneously wanting a decades spanning love story for Van and Taissa.

On the topic of Van, she’s one of the best representations of masc/gender nonconforming lesbians I’ve seen in my lifetime. The show allows her to be sweet and soft and emotionally vulnerable in a way that masc/butch lesbians are rarely allowed to be on screen. (I could go on about what that portrayal personally meant to me, but that’s a whole other thread)

However, the show’s overarching queerness and exploration of lesbian identity goes far beyond the canon relationships. Jackie and Shauna are two best friends on the show who have an underlying (and very obvious) romantic tension to their friendship complete with longing glances and homoromantic friendship breakups.

Let me put it this way, if you even remotely liked Jennifer’s Body, you will be head over heals for JackieShauna. And don’t even get me started on the visceral portrayal of Jackie’s comphet in the pilot (or do if you want a dissertation). And there’s also queer coding in so many other characters (stares at Lottie and her purple laced docs and Nat and her everything).

Also, I cannot stress enough how incredible this show is even beyond it’s queer elements! Like from the 90s vibes to the incredible writing to beautiful cinematography, it’s worth the watch. Like it’s a riveting psychological horror mystery that explores the brutalities of girlhood with heart and humor.

Did I mention Showtime renewed through season 3 before we even got a trailer for season 2, so we’re guaranteed at least two more seasons! (Not to mention Showtime has a long history of supporting lesbian and queer narratives)

[angel-ranger]

as promised, here is a whistlestop tour of my (belated) thoughts on idgie and ruth vs shauna and jackie. for @hellmo and @fueledbyseggovia.

jackie and ruth

• ruth, meaning "friend"

• jackie, meaning "supplanter"

• names in contrast yet so intwined

• ruth, above all else, is everyone's friend

• and jackie, above all else, supplants her true self in order to be everyone's friend

• people are drawn to them, smiles so honey sweet, eyes so expressive

• they're the types of people with souls so bright they light yours on fire, be that as a a fire you use to warm a home, or to burn it down

• they follow the rule book on how to be a good girl; a good woman

• ruth follows a man she doesn't love and bears his child, whilst jackie dates the popular boy everyone expects her to, and both end up being used and betrayed

• expectation weighs heavily on them

• fear of judgement fuels this

• so they do as they're told to play the role of the good girl, the good wife

• people consider them to be frail, but don't be fooled by the gentle and placating outer shell

• they give as good as they get

• they care about everyone, even if they may not care about them in return

• they're loyal to a fault

• they exist as one half of a whole

• soulmated to something wild, someone so in contrast to who they are

• bearing the weight of the world on their shoulders, it's no surprise they crumble under the weight it all

• as fortitudinous as their minds are, time runs out for everyone

• they are victims of fate; of "this was always going to happen"

• they are victims of the cruelty of nature

• leaving for them was never a choice, and if it were ever presented to them as such, they would never take it

• the only reason they would ever leave their loved ones behind is through death

• and a lady always knows when to leave

• the only difference being, whilst both left on their own terms

• ruth left laid in her bed, listening to her love tell one if her tall tales, surrounded by love and family and warmth

• jackie left laid outside in the dark, alone, surrounded by nothing and no one, surrounded by heartbreak, betrayal, and the cold

shauna and idgie

• neatly summed up, shauna and idgie are reckless. independent. childish. dependable. devoted

• they rarely think before they act - always a doer

• definitely of the opinion it's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission

• and fortune favours them in loving people so forgiving

• wild women by nature, quietly loving at heart

• natural storytellers

• they're simultaneously impossible to read whilst wearing their hearts on their sleeves

• they've only ever been in love with one person in their life, and they continue to love them once they're gone

• i don't think they'd even know how to stop

• they're independent, not because they don't need anyone, but for the longest time they didn't want anyone

• they'll forever feel like half of a whole.

• they'll forever wish for more time

• time to fix mistakes, time to show their love, time to grow

• but

• where shauna is haunted by jackie's death; followed by the ghost of her; moulding herself into what she assumed jackie's future would be and sacrificing her own

• idgie embraces all the bits of ruth left behind, and creates her life around them, continues her legacy in a way ruth would have loved

• where shauna is scared of all the jackie she can see in callie

• idgie rejoices in all the ruth she can see in buddy

• where idgie is proud of all the parts of herself she sees reflected in buddy

• shauna is terrified of her reflection in callie

• where idgie couldn't wait for her future with ruth

• shauna couldn't wait to have jackie out of hers

• but not like that

[zealouscanonindeer]

All i want for Christmas is you(and a inflatable snowman)

Just some Christmas fluff for @choicesficwriterscreations Holiday event. Finally,its December!

Prompts: The neighbors inflatable snowman is bigger than ours.

Is that my present in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

"Can you believe the audacity of that man! " Jackie exclaimed, walking in and throwing the door open with a loud thud. Aspen chuckled, following her as they got rid of the snow sticking to them.

"What's the matter.? " Sienna peeked from the kitchen, simultaneously baking three different Christmas treats.

Aspen sauntered to the freshly baked tray, popping a gingerbread man into her mouth and moaning at the burst of flavors.

"Jackie's mad cause the neighbors inflatable snowman is bigger than ours. "

"Not for long. " With that Jackie put on her jacket again, heading out the door with determination.

"Happy Christmas Eve, by the way! "

"You too, Si. "

"So any plans for tonight? "

"Just heading to Ethan's. I can't believe it's our first Christmas together. "

Pouring two glasses of egg nog and clinking them together before drinking, they slipped into an easy conversation about their day.

Jackie returned from her hunt, sadly unsuccessful. She pouted, sulking but that was soon remedied once Bryce and Elijah arrived with a bottle of tequila. With her friends getting drunken by the minute, Aspen slipped out unnoticed.

Walking to Ethan's house, the snow covered the city, the light snowfall setting up a chill, she didn't mind, it was serene. She reached his condo, letting herself in and instantly being ambushed by a barking Jenner.

"Whoa there, boy! I'm so happy to see you too. "

She led them both into the room, searching for Ethan, assuming he wasn't in yet, she made herself at home, starting up a fire. She noticed a list of presents on the teapoy, Ethan's handwriting evident.

He had put down people from the hospital, most of the nurses and the staff, she smiled at his thoughtfulness. She grabbed the pen, writing down two words before placing it back in its original place.

Ethan arrived shortly after, pulling his jacket off as he greeted her. He walked over to her on the couch, laying down in her lap. His hair was damp, with flecks of snow. Aspen gently pulled them off smiling, pressing a kiss to his forehead. He turned to lie on his back, opening his eyes to meet hers.

"What took you so long? "

"Just had to pick up a couple of things. "

"Oh, so is that my present in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? " He chuckled loving before continuing.

"That's all you, Penny. You have no idea how happy you make me. "

"Well.. you can certainly show me. "

"I plan on doing just that. "

********

"Penny, do you really want an inflatable snowman.? "

"Yep, the biggest one to ever exist. "

"May I ask why? "

"Cause we have to beat the neighbour's. "

Aspen replied casually as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Ethan Ramsey never thought he'd be talking about inflatable snowmen over breakfast, much less actually willing to set out on a search for one.

"You still haven't told me what else you want. "

"I don't. At the risk of sounding cheesy, all i wanted this Christmas was you and i already got that. "

"That's cheesy as hell. I'll see what I can do about that snowman of yours. "

"Mhmm." Aspen nodded with a mouthful of cereal, giving him a smile.

*********

The Christmas Eve party was in full swing with boisterous laughter and Christmas music blasting through the apartment. Aspen slipped past people, wising them before finding the person she was looking for.

She sat on Ethan's lap, resting her head on his shoulder as he ran his hand over her thigh. Just as it reached the hem of her skirt, he felt something against his fingers. Cautiously trailing underneath her skirt, he realised , exactly what it was.

"You like your gift? "

"Hmm."

"Why don't we head to yours and have a proper unwrapping. "

He nodded, getting up and linking their hands together before heading out.

"I actually have a surprise for you. " He said as they stood waiting for the elevator.

"What? "

"It wouldn't be a surprise if I tell you. "

Aspen scoffed, he knew how much she hated surprises or more accurately not knowing what the surprise was.

"Tell me. "

"You'll know soon enough. "

The elevator dinged as they walked out of the apartment complex. Before she could continue persuading him, her eyes met with a giant snowman perching in the snow. She stared at it in awe as Ethan gave her a toothy unreserved smile.

"Merry Christmas, Rookie. "

She only pulled him into a kiss, her lips curling into a smile that he had actually obliged her ridiculous request.

"Thank you for making this the best Christmas ever. "

[vansmissingcheek]

Die Trying II

We had been out for hours in the setting sun that resided in the late end of the summer. The mid sixties felt different back then. It was cool and the wind felt nice as it hit me with every passing second. My legs carrying me quickly up the field. Taissa had been moving simultaneously on the opposite side of the field. “Cross!” I bounded up passing the center of the field. The varsity team wasn’t anything special. To be fair neither was JV. We were quick and well worked but we had our wrinkles too. She winded back booting the ball to me. I felt it tap hard against my chest and drop to my feet. Trapping the ball and pulling it back to continue my trek. The call of Jackie up the field was all I needed to complete the play. I knew Jackie like I knew the summer. I knew what to expect and who would love it. I mean everyone loves summer in some way. Her signature move that she had been working on all through the workouts our team put in place. A header right into the net. All I needed to do was get it up to her. I passed the twenty and carried myself towards the box. A shout from Jackie was heard and I set her up clean for the shot. Within moments a group groan was let out from our team. Bright green jerseys teetering on annoyance. This was the third time Jackie failed to crash the net. She lost possession and did little in attempt to gain it back. I shared a look with Taissa as we were forced to rush down the field once again. I was bordering on exhaustion. Practice was bordering on 8:30. JV was down by two points and Van was tired I could tell. I was sick of this movement. Everyone lets Jackie have these moments. She always wants and what she wants she takes. Fun for parties but a drag to tolerate all of the time. I cut back sharp losing the striker running next to me. I crossed to the center eyeing the forward with the ball. I saw a rush of brown curls flying up the right side of the field. Taissa didn’t need a word to know exactly what was happening. I always appreciated how cunning she could be. She was quick and I slid into the ball taking possession myself. The onslaught of defenders would not stop me. I was determined to prove that this team could be something. That required work and wit and if anyone could understand that, it was Tai. I shot the ball up at the corner of the field. She was reader lined up to shoot as it landed at her feet. The arc was perfect. Landing with a swish in the net. I raised my hands in a cheer. The green jerseys followed, clapping. A woot was heard from our net.

As Taissa ran back down the field she enveloped me in a hug. Jackie was quiet but held a strained smile. Shauna watching closely as we embraced. It was quick but it meant something. Taissa wasn’t someone who just hugged people. She was strong and that scared a lot of people. I’ve always found a beauty in stability. The forested roots beneath me as we walked towards the makeshift camp reminded me of her. Always so sure and so determined. After that play she cared to ask me how I was in the classes we shared. That led to studying together. Both of us following the idea of getting out of this shithole town and finding anything better that existed in the world. There was comfort in knowing someone could be so alike to me. The advanced placement classes and the careful conversations we shared were anything but simple. Within the next two years me and Tai grew apart in some ways. She spent a lot of time with Van. I knew it wasn’t because of me but I guess I sort of learned that even knowing someone so well there’s something to appreciate in everyone. Van was kind. They were funny and caring. Fiercely loyal and a whole other headache I can’t even think about right now. Right now I am with Tai in the woods approaching the lions den. No one is kind after a week of waiting. People were angry and sad and hungry. Even in the wake of the crash there was hope that the rescue team would be here soon. After we buried the bodies of our fallen teammates all that was left to do was wait. The talking hardly stopped, no one wanted to have time to think.

Taissa split from me as we got back. Moving to where Van and Mari were sat near a fresh fire. My drifting eye-line caught Vans for merely a second. There’s so much to say but nothing to talk about. So I press forward swinging my arms and clasping them in-front of me. I meet Laura Lee, holding a decrepit bear. It was scruffy and had a stain of poppy washed off of its forehead, perhaps with water. Laura Lees smile could brighten even the dimmest of situations. Her faith was honestly impressive. Her fear had waned after a couple of freak-outs. She held my hands and prayed for my hearing a few days ago. Religion has never been my thing but I guess it felt nice to be thought about. “What’s his name?” I asked leaning on the plane’s detached side giving her a small smile. “This is Leonard,” She grins impossibly wider and hugs him tight. “Isn’t he cute?” Laura Lee pushes him out at me his crooked snout and singular eye were nothing short of charming. “Unbearably if I do say so myself,” I grin at my own pun and as she laughs she brings him close once again. “How are you feeling,” she brought a finger to point to her own head making circular motions. “with all of…that.” The smile never left her face when she asked the question though, I felt mine falter slightly. “Oh this old thing?” I tilt my head casually bringing my hand to act as if flipping my hair over my shoulder. “I mean it sure is a statement piece right?” I do a little spin and an unstable curtsy. She giggles at my antics and during my spin I catch the eyes of a certain ginger once again. They stare daggers into my form as I give Laura Lee another lopsided smile.

The moment was cut short as Taissa informed the group that she was going on a hike and would be back soon. There were protests and offers of company but she declined and went on her way; God help anyone who stood in Taissa Turners way.

This is part two of a series i’m very excited about 🐝

[einsteinsugly]

So one thing I love about Eric/Donna is that HE'S the 'softer', dreamier homebody while SHE'S the driven, blunt, and traditionally ambitious one. Not to give the show credit for being more progressive than it was, but that's a pretty cool subversion of the usual TV gender roles :) And it's also why they balance each other out---she's the energy, courage and 'get off your butt' drive he needs, and he brings out her more genuinely vulnerable, feelings-oriented, 'relax and enjoy the present moment' self. Just my opinion! Please keep the polls coming---I adore them! And I'm curious about which romance you think would be happier and healthier in real life: ED or JH?

Yeah, Eric takes more of the feminine role without being explicitly hyper feminine. He's not athletic or mechanical, but his geeky hobbies have more of a masculine edge. He's just a whimsical feeler at heart with a snarky edge. He wants to help others, like his mother, but he wants to be a hero like his dad. Just in a different way. He's the most obvious INFP to ever INFP, simply. He struggles to stand up for himself, and Donna helps him with that.

Donna, on the other hand, needs the stability Eric provides. Simultaneously, he helps her calm down when things get tough. Although Eric doesn't really provide the focus Donna craves, he's always there for her. A loving constant, if you will. When she implodes, she has disastrous ESTP vibes, and that's when she's at her worst. She's a clear ENTJ with hopes for the future, with just enough of an energetic edge to get Eric moving. They complement each other perfectly, simply.

*****

The show had a bit of a progressive edge in the first couple of seasons, but that quickly fell by the wayside in the later seasons. It sucks, but eh, it was the early 00s. And some of the later seasons stuff, mainly Fez's character, was even questionable by 00s standards.

*****

And thanks! I will. :) To answer your last question, both couples have their healthier bits. Both couples balance each other out. Jackie and Hyde are the "cool" couple, and Eric and Donna are "Mom and Dad." So different vibes. They all learn to communicate better in time, as they age and figure shit out. They're both equally happy and healthy, albeit in different ways.

However, I do think older!Eric would irk older!Donna a bit, sometimes. He definitely gets more talkative as he ages, in my mind, and definitely really gets set in his ways (a broken record, if you will). But she still loves him dearly, even though he drives her crazy sometimes.

Jackie and Hyde have a similar dynamic, but Jackie's the annoying one. But that's always been the case. They adore each other, of course.

[shaunamilfman]

to add onto your last post, i know shauna would break down to casual because jackie feels like the type of girl to want to make out with shauna while drunk and/or practice kissing with her "for boys" (which goes wayyy too far)

damn bro that was quick lmaoo. no but you're so correct. casual is suchhhh a shauna song to me honestly.

Jackie def makes out with Shauna for practice for boys because "it doesn't count if you're a girl 🥰🥰" and Shauna's got such mixed feelings about it. she loves it and needs it and simultaneously hates that she loves it and resents Jackie for making her want it.

then when they get older it turns into Jackie kissing her when they're drunk which she pretends she's too drunk to remember imo. "just drunk, silly" like she didn't purposely get wasted with the idea of kissing shauna in her mind. Jackie throws out every excuse in the book to kiss shauna with until Shauna eventually blows up about it. god i love themmmm

[elvenbeard]

I'm still standing- for the wip ask game please!

Aaahhh thanks so much for asking!! :DD

"I'm still standing" is the chapter in with Vince and Jackie meet for the first time :3 It's set in early 2067. I really loved writing it and putting Vince in probably the most dangerous situation he's ever been in his life up until this point, because it would be a formative moment on how he deals with those kinds of threats and shows how he makes his decisions. Also I really enjoyed thinking about the dynamics of the group of Valentinos Jackie was with at the time and sort of teasing that he wouldn't be a full member of them for long anymore at that point. I'll include a few snippets that show all of that with some context :D

At first Vince stumbled into a group of Valentinos who want to take his mothers car, that he "borrowed" and unknowingly parked in their neighborhood. Their leader ("Gold-Jaw") is threatening and slowly approaching him, while the rest of the group watches tensely.

Gold-Jaw was about three yards away. Vincent focused on him, a quick scan of his opulent hardware revealing many ways to mess him up. He took a deep breath, then made his pick. The Valentino screamed and winced when the joints in his artificial knees spasmed, sparks flying as he stumbled to the ground cursing. Vincent took off, running right past him towards the Caliburn. Two more of the Valentinos screeched, their optics bursting, their nervous systems overloaded for just long enough to throw them off. Vincent fumbled in his coat pocket for the keycard, pushed past the first of the blinded Valentinos, then the next. He pulled out the card, the door of the car swinging open, the cozy white interior beckoning him like a safe haven. The next thing he knew was that concrete was just as hard and rough as it looked. He fell onto his side hard, heard the fabric of his coat tear at the shoulder seam. Before he fully realized what had happened a flash of gold struck his face, then again, someone holding him down with their entire weight on his chest, making it hard to even breathe. He scrambled to somehow defend himself, raising his left arm above his face, with his right simultaneously reaching for the keycard he had dropped on impact. It had landed not far away next to the rear wheel of the car. He’d gotten so fucking close… The next hit grazed his nose, and the crunching noise alone almost made him gag, let alone the pain. Another hit made his vision blur, and the world went black for a second or two. The subtitles on his optics interface returned jarred and all over the place, as multiple people were yelling and cursing, most of all the woman with the golden arm he now recognized as the one sitting on his chest. Her claws were curled into a fist, raised and ready to strike again, blood – his blood – dripping from her knuckles. With her organic left hand, she was clutching Vincent’s collar, pushing him down hard. Too dazed to do much else, he simply tried to brace himself. Before the woman’s fist connected with his face a fifth and likely final time, Gold-Jaw appeared above them, snatching her wrist.

Some back and forth between the Valentino's follows, and Vince makes up blatant lies about who he is in an attempt to get out of his dire situation.

Vincent smiled, trying his best to not to force it, hoping that the blood he tasted, that began to fill his mouth, made him look messed up while keeping a calm demeanor, even though he wasn’t really in the most intimidating position, flat on the ground and all… “The NCPD, please!” he laughed, his jaw and ribs hurting, but he breathed through the pain, “That’s a Militech company vehicle. The moment it leaves the predetermined perimeter you’ll have a whole firing squad on your asses.” “Bullshit!” Gold-Jaw spat out, but even through half closed eyes Vincent could see that his confident stance was cracking slightly. Some of the other Valentinos murmured something that his translator didn’t quite pick up on, but Gold-Jaw swung around to them. “Got something to say, say it to my face!” “Aahh, I don’t know, Alejandro,” one of the other guys said, a young sounding voice, “Maybe it’s the truth. Don’t wanna mess with Militech, with everything else that’s going on right now…” “And who exactly asked your fucking opinion, huh?” Gold-Jaw, or Alejandro, apparently, turned back to Vincent. “What a load of horseshit, as if that thing’s a company vehicle!” He gestured towards the car, but Vincent noticed that Claw-Lady no longer had her hands on the steering wheel, one foot still out on the street. “My mother is a high-ranking manager,” he continued to lie through his teeth, “You’re fucked already anyway. When she gets here and sees me like this, Heywood’s going to go up in flames. Don’t make it worse – “ “SHUT UP!” Alejandro screamed and lifted Vincent up by the collar, so rapidly and with such force that he choked. He then promptly tossed him back onto the ground, Vincent landing face first in the dirt in front of the other Valentinos.

The thing is, while Vince's mom is not working for Militech or anything like that, his story is rooted in the truth somewhat, and enough of the Valentinos are eventually intimidated and convince Alejandro to just leave with the car. The young-sounding Valentino that spoke up first is Jackie, as you may have guessed, and Alejandro is not pleased with his challenging one bit, threatening him to not show himself at El Pinche Pollo tonight before leaving with the rest of the gang.

Vincent remained on the ground, actually enjoying the soothing cold of the asphalt against his throbbing face. At least until a raspy voice and scuttling almost made him jump out of his skin. “Hey, you good over there?” Vincent abruptly lifted his head, his left eye still struggling to focus. He propped himself up slowly, still too shaky to really stand, so he just slumped backwards and sat on the ground. “Man, you look like shit,” the young Valentino who had spoken up against Alejandro said. He couldn’t be much older than Vincent himself, had broad shoulders, tan skin, but was still somewhat baby-faced. Thick black hair shaved at the back and sides and worn in a slick ponytail, dressed in a black and orange bomber jacket, black cargo pants and boots, a thick gold chain with an opulent cross around his neck, he was unmistakably a Heywood-native. Although except for a small filter on his nose he was lacking the Valentino’s usual flashy cyberware. There was a gash on his cheek where Alejandro had hit him, and he reached up to check how much it was bleeding. He chuckled. “You’re lucky you caught Alejandro on a good day,” he joked, “I’ve seen him shoot a guy in the knee once because he accidentally drank from his beer.” Vincent wasn’t sure what to make of the guy’s easygoing demeanor, this whole situation really. He was just at a loss for words and what to do next. The Valentino kid got up from the ground with a groan, brushing off the dust from his pants. He was taller than he looked at first. Then he slowly walked towards Vincent, who tried his best not to flinch. “Hey, don’t worry, cabrón, I won’t bite,” he said, holding out his hand as he came to a halt right before Vincent, “Name’s Jackie, Jackie Welles.”

And that's how Vince and Jackie meet in my headcanon xD

[fabaceous]

Feel free to ignore this, I just have some thoughts i want to share with you:

Shauna represses her dark side in contrast to Misty who doesn't. Jackie wants to be loved but she doesn't show it in contrast to Misty who would do anything to get it.

INTERESTING and thank you very much for sharing! Hmm. I think I partly agree and partly disagree with you. let's walk together.

shauna does at least start out trying to hide her dark side from herself as well as everyone else, but eventually in the wilderness i think she sort of gives up, in that she starts allowing herself to act on it more often. i think she also used to act on it sort of unwittingly/instinctively, like fucking jeff was definitely shauna's dark side, but i don't think she was really conscious of it. but she's feeling liberated enough in the wilderness to admit it exists now, like when lottie talks to her about eating jackie and she says "but i wanted it too." but shauna is strange, i think she is capable of simultaneously repressing and acting on her dark side but without either of those things making the other one impossible. know what i mean? kinda doublethink-y. but i agree, misty is more willing to embrace it from day 1 (chopping off ben's leg - although that could be justified as survival so maybe instead lets say that moment where she trips him as he's trying to hop along) and doesn't seem to make any attempts to lie to herself about having this dark side - she seems just fine with it! i actually sort of wonder if she would even consider it a "dark" side? like she seems not to have many qualms about it lol.

as for your second point, i'm going to play devil's advocate and say i'm not so sure it's really "love", per se, that misty wants. i think she wants acceptance and companionship but i'm not sure if she's preoccupied with "love" in the same way that jackie is. jackie wants, like, devotion. I don't think misty really cares about that, she just wants to feel like she's a part of the group and people need her. which is also valid lol and i think jackie also wants those things but i do feel like that is a difference between them. and i think although they are both quite desperate for the thing they want, whether it's acceptance or love or some combination, misty is much more blatant and gutsy in the things she does to try to get that. but even though jackie isn't munchausen-ing people on a daily basis, i dont think shes really hiding that she wants love, or if she does, she's doing a kinda crappy job of it lol.

[sillypilled-friendcel]

i hate my body. i hate myself. i hate the world around me. i have to be so careful about how i dress if i ever want to talk about my issues in person, and it still feels like no one believes me. i dont want ti be a woman. i want to be a man. i AM a man. im a man who likes dresses and skirts and pink and getting my nails done, just like plenty of other men. its okay when cis men do it, but the moment i do it its somehow proof that im lying. that im a woman. that i am the daughter my mother wants me to be. binders are too dangerous. hrt is too dangerous. being called by "he" or "jackie" is just out of the question. my name is jackie everywhere i can feasibly put it. i dont know if she'll let me go on T if it's on her money, or if the doctors will out me on it. it doesnt matter that the ignorance of my gender, of ME, makes me want to fucking die. if i tell my mother i want to kill myself, she assumes it has nothing to do with the way i am treated over this. this is everything to me. how would she feel if everyone around her, everyone she cares for, called her by the wrong name and pronouns and made her out to be something she isnt over something she cant control? she'll never know. she'll never know what it's like to be in the wring body, one you simultaneously love and hate for all the wrong reasons. if i give up on being pretty, what do i have to live for? i need to be pretty to be liked. i need to be liked to be worth living. i need to be a girl to be pretty. i want to be a pretty boy. i want to be a skinny pretty boy who wears skirts and dresses and is STILL RECOGNIZED AS A MAN. i hate this. i hate living as, being SEEN as, a girl. it makes me sick to my stomach. i feel sick writing this, thinking about it. i dont want to eat anymore. i dont want to live anymore. i cant keep going like this, being someone im not. being someone i cant stand being. i am a fucking man. i am a man. i am a man. i am a man. i am a man. fuck. theyre gonna bury me in a dress and lipstick and my eulogy will go on and on about what a lovely daughter and sister and girl i was. i think im gonna throw up im so nauseous just thinking about it. fuck.