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useragarfield · 3 months

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ZADE MARRIED MOMENTS: 41/∞ Hart of Dixie 4.07 | “The Butterstick Tab”

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profounddefendorcrusade-blog · 5 months

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I feel bad for Starlo. (pt. 6)

I think the main thing we were supposed to see as Star's character flaw wasn't that he was acting proud/arrogant/reckless/badass (I mentioned that it's fine for him to act that way because he deserved it after everything good he did and obviously I still mean it 110%), but how that proud, charming guy was never the real him. He literally lost himself trying to feel worthy and please everyone in town. For years he's been acting the role (for a noble cause) but the price was him losing touch with the nerd he is.

Yet STILL, if only everyone had been a bit more gentle with him, I bet he'd have toned it down during the WE section, and even before that. But they all decided to let him know the truth at the worst possible time, right when he was supposed to make Clover his deputy. Right after they attacked the kid because they were jealous. It was supposed to be the PEAK of Starlo's day and they randomly threw the "we never liked any of this" bomb at him instead of trying to talk it out BEFORE things escalated. I'd be pissed too.

Oh yeah...

... his brother doesn't take him seriously apparently and doesn't realize that staying positive and strong 24/7 is tougher than it looks, especially with Starlo's insecurities (and yeah being a farmer is hard work, but so is being in Star's position; on the contrary, it's even TOUGHER) ...

Orion should try being an entertainer for a day and see what it's like, let alone doing it for years

...Solomon says how Star thought him and Crestina didn't support his life choices...

... and how he rarely talks to his family...

...and it suddenly came to me: in all these years, they didn't ever bother telling him that they did support him? They didn't bother trying to reach out to him more? Understand his passion (Ceroba doesn't get it either; once again, I don't blame Starlo for caring about Clover so much, that kid understood)? Have an honest talk?

No wonder Star stopped interacting with them for the most part. Maybe him feeling worthless came from his family? Who knows (or he was bullied as a kid for being a nerd). In any case, he clearly had to deal with these feelings by himself.

This man's been through some stuff.

P.S. I know he has flaws like everyone, but you've gotta ask yourself the important question: WHY? where did all this come from? But clearly nobody in his life ever asked themselves this. So it all kept building up till he almost killed his deputy for... status. He was SO desperate to feel valued and get his friends back (who made him feel less alone.. but ultimately just left when he needed someone the most, at least ONE person) that he was ready to go all the way to achieve what he'd been lacking his entire life: *feeling like he MATTERED.*

I wonder If he'll ever go 100% back to being his true self. Slim chances :'( this is him now. Half farmer half sheriff

#undertale yellow #uty #starlo uty #uty starlo #why is this character so tragic #without being tragic #i mean the “Ceroba” type of tragic #I'm no psychologist but I sure know feelings like this stem from childhood/adolescence #I'm talking bout the fact starlo literally decided that his life purpose would be pretending to be a sheriff. I repeat. PRETENDING #aka someone important #bc he never felt important #he tried lying to everybody and especially himself #that he was 'great' and 'cool'#bc nobody ever made him feel that way #plus ceroba ditched him for someone more 'serious' she had just met #I have to write about the sentence above soon #like I'm not saying Solomon & crestina are terrible people #But parents..?#Wellll...#I kinda sometimes imagine Star being made fun of by his peers and so he'd always retreat to his room and cry alone #That is #Until he found those western cassettes (I imagine it happened when he was a teen)#So instead of crying #He'd just distract himself for hours and hours #And pretend he was someone with more value who everyone respected #That's how the persona came to be #And so he began to lose touch with his real self more and more #As well as his feelings and problems #Until he just snapped #I can't anymore

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cubffections · 17 days

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so argenxi . . argenxi at it's finest ꒰ᐡ⸝⸝σ̴̶̷̤ . σ̴̶̷̤⸝⸝꒱꜆

#𐔌❤︎ ꣓ㅤ ˖ 𝓪𝓻𝓰𝓮𝓷𝔁𝓲 ྀི ౿#argenxi's kiss went a little like this actually 𐔌՞⸝⸝ʚ̴̶̷̷ · ʚ̴̶̷̷⸝⸝ ՞𐦯 #꒰ᐢ⸝⸝⸝⸝ᐢ꒱ g'na xplain in terms of m self insert #it was wayy before m' bein a companion on the astral express、a more regal settin' actually #a masquerade ball、one of the most adored events in high society— masking your identity & being able to enjoy a ball secretly #it was something most nobles looked forward too! especially one who was a daughter of a famed duke #but in this case、 said daughter was a petal away from horrible breakdown. tears flowing down her face as she sat on the terrace somberly #it was only thanks to a certain beauty her tears began to come to a slow halt、watery eyes soon seeing a vivid red rose infront of them.#she accepted the rose after fiddling with her appearance 、quickly adjusting the mask back on before greeting the gentleman #she felt silly. how could she breakdown in a public setting like that?#she apologized for the herself only to be asked about her wellbeing and a soft compliment、as if he disregarded the apology as unnecessary #from there a conversation had sparked. not a small chit chat that she rehearsed many times before— no、a genuine one.#his back rested against the balcony as hers laid upon it as well、their comforting talk together being never ending as if they just clicked.#it was a couple questions after midnight before i asked him— ''what do you think a kiss tastes like?''#we were already on the topic on love、one where i shared a great interest in while he showed his admirations towards idrila ..#nonetheless the question did catch the knight off guard、soon turning his neck to face me #he called the question vague with a light chuckle saying that most people would ask how kisses /felt/ instead #he was right、however my heart was racing and i felt like a idiot falling fast for a man i barely knew. so i refrased the question #''what would it feel like to kiss you?''#a silence came after that、the two of unaware how close the proximity between us had gotten.#curiosity makes a person do reckless things. for example— kissing a man before even learning their name.#( hehe oops i rambled :3c ... )

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thedeadthree · 10 months

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-`. OCS AS TYPES OF SUFFERING.

TAGGED BY @chuckhansen, @queennymeria, @shellibisshe, @leviiackrman, @nightbloodbix, @lavampira, @marivenah, @faerune, @socially-awkward-skeleton and @corvosattano to take this uquiz for a few dears !! ty ty!!!!!!

TAGGING: @ruinbringer, @griffin-wood, @duskfey, @jendoe, @aponibolinayen, @pinkfey, @unholymilf, @gwynbleidd, @adelaidedrubman, @carlosoliveiraa, @grapecaseschoices, @flyntz, @jackiesarch, @katsigian, @quickhacked, @full---ofstarlight, @avallachs, @risingsh0t, @dameayliins, @starforger, @vanoefucks, @yennas, @bloodofvalyria, @malefiicarum, @ravensgard, @theviridianbunny, @mrdekarios, @shadowglens, @fenharel, @nokstella, @swordcoasts, @leondaltons and you!!

-`. DESPAIR.

The tunnel never had a light. You wish for nothing because you know you'll receive nothing, and your hopes died out long ago. The only thing that keeps you going is the thrill of emptiness you feel when things don't turn out your way. It's bitter. It's proof. Proof that you don't feel this way for nothing.

-`. THE BLACKHOLE.

There's a hole where your heart used to be and nothing is filling that hollow void. You could drown in a world curated for you, and still nothing seems to fit. It eats you alive knowing you're unsure how to satiate the hunger of your soul. It's barely hunger, it's more like a blackhole.

-`. THE TAKER.

Your expectations are ones you can barely meet. You compare yourself to others, but with a hypocritical light. You'll never find what you're looking for if you're laying down half of what you receive. It stings to be given less than expectations you've set, but if they were more reasonable, do you think even then you'd be happy?

-`. YEARNING.

The pain in your chest bubbles knowing that what you want may never be yours. You're lost in a fantasy world, or consumed by what you wish you were or had as opposed to what you do. It's hard to appreciate what's around you when you're appreciating the hope of what could be instead.

-`. THE GIVER.

Your energy depletes as you hand it out to anyone passing by your basket. People walk by and take, but no one ever leaves. You're constantly running on low when people keep asking you to give. You'd give your soul away for free, and then what left do you have of yourself if you can't say no?

-`. LONELINESS.

Your heart feels full of the connection you feel you lack. No matter how many people are around you, strangers or not….someone is missing. You don't know who, what, or if you'll ever find them. You're unsure if there's a person out there who'll really satisfy your life, so really what's the point of continuing to look?

#only if you want to of course !! <3 #oc: amavet aerasume #oc: yeva yakovleva #oc: vaermina vanthampur #oc: tissaia thorm #oc: chiara de laurentis #oc: cythia vassermiller #GEE WHIZ QUIZ WARN ME NEXT TIME BEFORE YOU GUT AMAVET LIKE THAT gvashgdv *SCREAMS*#DESPAIR. HE GOT DESPAIR IM - !!!!! are you KIDDING mee!!#they dont call him the mourning lord for giggles :') THE NERVEE #im fine with this im fine with this im fine :)#*screams* ok ok i was a bit ?? with yevas but I THOUGHT ABOUT IT AND RAHH ITS !! it gets her!!!!!!!#they were too on the nose sweet pea im SORRY vaer !!#TIISSAIAAAA FIRST OF ALL HOW YOU DARE QUIZ SECOND OF ALL DO YOU MIND IF I BEGAN CRYING BC!!#TISSAIA MY SWEET GIRL :') this is fine!!!!#CHIARAA i knew she would get this answer I KNEWW ITTTT #cythias *screams* THE WAY THERE WAS SOMETHING I HAVE HAD BRAINSTORMED FOR HER IN MIND THAT FITS THIS SO WELL??#over the course of her arc in the novels (and show as well!!) loneliness is PREVALENT the part on how in spite of the people around #she can still feel loneliness is SO poignant to the isolation she feels at court this answer gets her to the letter AHH!!#TY TY SO MUCH FOR THE TAGS i missed doing uquizzes sm !!!!!! THIS WAS FUN <3 i may do more clowns with this it was lovely !!#cy ur so a*licent coded <3 'is there no one in the empire to take my side' 'i have no friends here all they see is the empress' SCREAMSS #something something 'id like to think im still the lady cythia' AAAAA BABY BABY MY POOR BABYY #i mean vaer was living in an estate alone with just her t*ressym trying not to be a sacrificed to summon the hells by her family so she #really just had her expectations of the life she manifested SO LIKE..... yk?? sweet pea'll marry the love of her life and #skxjjxjx

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ccbatman · 3 months

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actually so evil how much of hal's internal world gets obliterated with the rewriting of his relationships with jessica and martin.

#hal jordan #empyrean posting #ok going in the tags because im not actually v confident in my understanding of his character. i read all of his 80s/90s stuff but forgot #90% of it but ANYWAY.#so much of him just does not make sense with how geoff johns characterises him and his relationships with his parents particularly the #parallax stuff simply because of how much his relationship with the guardians and their apathy/'betrayal' is influenced by hal's original #relationship with his dad. like at its heart it's pretty much the same dynamic in how hal blindly trusts and sort of idolises the guardians #despite their repeated infractions in hope of... something in return just as he had with his father and the abuse he suffered at martin's #hands. that's what makes his anger at the guardians make sense when it does show itself because the relationship parallel didn't stop there.#as with martin hal gets nothing for his devotion. he gets nothing for doing everything that's asked of him and more and it ends the same way #too: with a man in the sky burning like a newborn star. and you lose so much of that nuance and intrigue behind that if you just make #jessica the 'bad one' because!!! you cheapen it!!!!#the whole idea of hal is that he has his father's face but his mother's scars #(to me). in the sense that they both reacted to martin the same way with that cognisance of who he was as a man yet inability to pull away #because... love. both the love they had for him and the conviction that he did or could love them too. and jessica arguably did eventually #but also she didnt did she? because she held onto that notion of love till the very end. the few scraps she had she ballooned outwards until #they became the whole. but hal didnt have even that and he spent his whole life chasing it & running away from wanting it at the same time #like i think there's something so interesting to the fact that he had to be convinced that flying was what he wanted to do. how much of that #was touched by his father? the fear that he was already too much like him than he could bear to be? he already had his face now he had his #dreams and longing for the sky. how much more could he have before he began repeating the cycle?#and at the end he even had his father's death. burning in the clouds. like there's so much there and that's not even touching on how it #impacts his relationships with other heroes. not just in the sense of why did kyle clark and diana get to keep their close yet complex #relationships with their moms when hal had to lose his (although yeah why did they) but also just how he lets himself come across to them.#because it's on purpose right? that he lets them think his reflection of his father is born out of unadulterated love for a man worthy of it #? he has his father's job he wears his father's jacket he smiles his father's smile. what else are they supposed to think.#and isnt that interesting!!! that this man who is so committed to being good & just can lie so casually to people he thinks of as friends!!!#can you see how that might be his mother through and through!!! in how she might have glossed over the abuse to other people and herself!!!#can you see how in spite of it all he might want to be perceived as his father that paragon of masculinity and resent that he is not!!!#do you understand how everything he loves has been poisoned!!! im thinking of that scene where he tells bruce about watching martin die &#wouldnt it have been so much more interesting through this lens. how he is both revealing & obfuscating at once. i hate the change sm

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helpimstuckinafandom · 4 months

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Me starting another bg3 run where I will make virtually all the same decisions in mostly the same order as if there isn't different branching paths

#the horrifying idea of things going differently if i choose something different #my ass sitting here wanting other content for it as if i'm not actively refusing to make the choices to get other content #i've still only romanced astarion bro #i had my og. the EXACT copy of my og but durge this time.#began a karlach run to romance wyll and am still in early act 1 so nothing will happen for a long ass time #and i left that because i missed my paladin. the party feels incomplete without them bro #started a rogue/fighter run of one of my ocs retrofitted into the game.#but also am incapable of staying true to the character cause i'll miss stuff if i do and i need to do EVERYTHING explore EVERYWHERE #nearly couldn't get over the hurdle of having no strength and no speak with animals (so karlach and wyll gotta speak to critters)#then just started a sorcerer to try to really push myself to branch out. but all it did was reaffirm that being a spell caster sucks #no jump cause no strength no health no armour no decent melee. like motherfucker pick a struggle #luckily that oc is into music so sorcerer-bard here we come #but every single one of these bitches is good aligned #(and anything i SHOULD do different i don't cause there's still different varoeties of good but alas)#still haven't romanced another party member (but that's not ENTIRELY my fault!!!!)#my og/og durge was the same person i couldn't just romance someone else. they got with astarion i don't make the rules #karlach WILL romance wyll if i ever get farther in #my rogue/fighter oc is heading the baldur's gate for his boyfriend and they have an open relationship so he COULD fuck other people #alas he would never due to his own issues #BUT THIS WILL CHANGE #my sorcerer/bard (who is the boyfriend of the rogue. just imagining the plot as if he was on the adventure or rogue was in baldur's gate)#and he WOULD fuck other people no strings attached #so my goal is to fuck all potentially non-monogamous party members #so lae'zel shadowheart astarion #wyll is a slow burn so that's emotional depth we wouldn't put in #gale is king or monogamy (plus him and this character together would make the rogur pass the fuck out)#karlach is complicated because of the no touch thing? hard to say how much emotional depth ends up required there #meanwhile shadowheart has mentioned she does no strings attached hook-ups #lae'zel propositions you ten seconds in for a good tumble #and from romancing astarion i know fucking the first time seems like it'll just be casual hook up time and i needn't go further

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ialwaysknewyouwerepunk · 4 months

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#had a tough day today bc i had to meet up with our hr manager for a 'talk' about my absence #i was so nervous for it that i was drained before it even began #i asked a colleague of mine to be there #an older man who i trust with these things bc he's very calm but often knows what to say at the right time #and is very sensitive #he could tell i wasn't doing well before i told anyone #he's dealt with his own darkness as well so i know that's why i gravitate to him #the conversation went okay. i said what i wanted to say #the hr manager clearly wanted to see me /wanting/ to come back on monday lol #expecting a quick fix like they always do #she did take away my main points so i really hope i see the results. and i asked to come back without my manager breathing down my neck #i hope that gets respected too #then afterwards. after already almost crying a million times my colleague asked if i wanted to bike with him to this statue #that got placed here today bc it's a traveling thing to raise awareness for suicide #he supports that cause bc his son is a victim of suicide #and i could tell he was having a hard time but then he also actually said it #i was crying man. he doesnt know how deep it goes for me but #i think i gave him a bit of comfort being there. showing i understand #when i got home he texted me to thank me for going with him bc he couldn't have done it alone.#im gonna cry myself to sleep tonight #my posts

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cent-scratchnsniff · 6 hours

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here together

#lobotomy corporation #lobcorp #lobotomy corp spoilers #lobotomy corporation spoilers #abram lobcorp #i didnt know that the song that plays during day 48 ending is called 'here together'.#couldnt hear it well because i typically have my sound low (sensetive to louder sounds) and also the dialog fucked me up #so when i pressed on it to hear it. to actually listen to it. then to see the name and remember what it Looked like #i got teary eyed. sorry.#it happened quite. afew times when finishing this shitty thing #i was thinking of how camren's not quite corpse looked as if it were reaching out to him inside the container #how it looked as if she had wings. abrams words. the line from one story that was--#something like 'we were hoping it was just one big prank and she would hop out fro. around the corner with a smile on her face'#how do you move forward when all you think you cause is pain? when everything else youve done only brought to bring people you love to thei #downfall and demise inside agony and fear as they lay dying. none of that was merciful. none of that was just. they were told to carry on #her dream and he views as if all he had done was to become cruel and wasnt fit and never even began to finish what she started.#it was so striking to me. the language he used. sleeping. alseep. waken. when all the others never sugarcoated it #in lobcorp they always said it straight. 'suicide' 'killed' 'dead'. but he used something far more.. peaceful? kind in wording in a way.#softer. describing death as if it were a merciful thing. an end that suits them and not something to be afraid of. to just... sink. to slee #to be with carmen again. to put everything to an end #the place they built with their hands. to have it just... stop. not in a way of repeating and staying in the moment #but of a permanent end. to 'sleep'. to die. to just.... stop. forever. to see no more. to do no more #to not be able to do Anything for when ever he had done Something it just cause agony. cruel hands partaking in acts he so deeply #regrets. everything is just regret. it sounds nice. to move on. to just move forward. but how can you move forward when all you think you #bring to those you cherished and couldnt leave behind is pain?#ill likely move this somewhere else as well. ive been meaning to talk about abram #the rest as well actually. mostly just the few final days w abel adam and abram since i am STUCK ON DAY 49 #oh dear i uh typed a lot in the tags. oops

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dylanconrique · 3 days

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#carly lb chicago fire #chicago fire #6x06 #kelly severide #stella kidd #stellaride #ONCE AGAIN THIS WOULD BE A PERFECT SCENE FOR TIM AND LUCY #GIVE MY GIRL A FEW TOO MANY AND CONFESS HOW VIOLENTLY IN LOVE SHE IS WITH HIM STILL DESPITE HIS IDIOCITY AND BREAKING UP W/ HER #omg could you imagine....#he brings her home and she slurs at him something like 'that lie detector was wrong... you- you said you loved me! but you lied!'#you know he would just stand there and take it and let her bully him knowing that even though these are her true feelings....#she doesn't actually mean the harsh things she says #OH MY GOD I HAVE A WIP AND A DRIVE TO WRITE FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2024 BEGAN??????????#the rookie #tim bradford #lucy chen #chenford

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arolesbianism · 5 months

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Thinks oh so hard abt the spiraling upwards clan founders, especially the birchclan founders. Silly lil kitties who's pasts are drenched in blood with the primary regret of not drawing it sooner

#rat rambles #oc posting #warriors posting #spiraling upwards #long story short they had a shitty awful terrible leader who sucked absolutely ass and they tore him to shreds #I mean that literally they pinned him onto the mountain side and slashed and mauled the shit out of him so hard that his lives evaporated #and several of the cats involved in that scene are sill alive and major parts of the story and I love them #oh also the cat that pinned him through a stab through the throat was his own daughter btw everyone hated his ass so much #and for good reason get his ass #alas in the main story I dont rly get to go too deep into how he harmed everyone involved mostly just three main ones #aka bristlestar because shes murtlepaw's ghost mom dawncrackle because hes also haunting murtle and gullspot because shes bristle's kit #so basically all the flashbacks we get involve those three in some form or another #honeystar was also there and involved but Im not currently planning on having her rly talk abt that #most of her more modern angst is the fact that she was forced into leadership against her will #and shes been alive long enough that shes been leading birchclan far longer than she ever lived in her old clan #but she did go through a lot of shit before birchclan was founded and it definitely shaped her a lot #she used to be a very determined and high spirited lil kitty cat who tried to be optimistic #but her family began to slowly be picked off one by one by both the old leader and the one whod later get evicerated #some of the older cats around her hoped it make her back down from her revelutionary ideas but she noticed that and it backfired on them #instead of being worn down to submission she became absolutely Furious and began to lash out more and become more demanding #it got to the point that she really only had two friends in the entire clan and one of them was her aunt whod later also die after coming #out abt having witnessed the leader killing his own kits #that was the final fucking straw for her and she was fully on board when bristle and dawn started looking for cats to join their rebellion #she did get rly frustrated with them as they waited patiently for the right moment but her remaining bestie kept her from going apeshit #so once the big fight finally broke out she was more than eager to join the hoard of cats chasing the bastard upwards #now unlike some of the other cats involved this legitimately actually made her feel a lot better for a while #for the first time in ages she finally felt like she could be optimistic abt smth again and was excited abt the idea of leaving this place #she had lost so much in this damn place since she was an apprentice and just wanted to finally be able to rest easy #but once they got to their new territory and set up camp things went south real fast as a flood fucked everything up #and after losing the only cat she had left in her life and losing her tail and being made deputy on top of that she deteriorated quickly

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eccentrickleptomaniac · 1 year

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i still think about countryhumans btw its mostly just worldbuilding shit now. i love worldbuilding

#essen talks #morocco keeps getting revived in different time periods and its freaking her out. nobody has any idea whats going on #allied-occupied germany existed briefly in the real world but merely a vessel for east and west to fester within. perhaps he was a brief-#revival of weimar i think that would be funny #speaking of weimar i believe that in his final few months of living he began acting more and more like tr and so when tr finally “took over #nobody even batted an eye. they only realized weimar died over a decade ago when tr finally killed himself and the body refused to-#auto-disintigrate. which freaked out everyone btw #while the warsaw pact was supposed to die july 1st‚ she stuck around to welcome the ussr to the afterlife. the higherups couldnt decide-#which patron continental principality would greet him and so unlike tradition‚ a lower angel stepped up. she disintegrated immediately afte #i should probably talk about the organization angels more actualyl #the “angels” in this universe are just organizations. they know their lifespan the second they are created and mainly keep things in order.#when they die they disintegrate back into the void and leave behind a gem to be given to the last country that saw them alive.#angel death is rather beautiful to countries. its sort of like stained glass idk how to describe it #anyways rambling over byeee

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dutybcrne · 1 year

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It’s easy enough to tell just how much something really got to Kaeya based on the air around him. He’s so carefully in control of his own emotions and Vision alike, his true feelings tend to go unnoticed or masked as something else. But if it really threw him or a loop or upset him in some way, a notable change in temperatures ( proportionate to how much he was affected ) is the surest sign, regardless of his poker face.

#hc; kaeya #//You know it's BAD bad if ice actively starts forming on himself/nearby without him noticing or in spite of him trying to keep calm #//But that usually only happened if something's truly threatening a loved one and he can't do a damn thing about it #//Or otherwise brought out of him by certain folks he's attached to. Like a certain claymore user for instance #//If Diluc ever tried to initiate reconciliation abruptly or even began to pry into his business; Kae is deffo bound to freeze something #//And he would sure hope Diluc wouldn't try to grab his shoulder or otherwise touch him unexpectedly; bc he'd give the man HELLA frostburn #//Pyro and Cryo do Not mix well; especially not if he was already stressed to begin with #//Anyone else trying to pry would get a chill in the air; whether bc of annoyance or rising stress #//Though Jean could also get him to freeze smth if she catches him off-guard a lot easier than most #//Especially if it flusters him--he would accidentally make a flurry burst of ice crystals the moment the feeling hits #//She and Diluc are the people he is/was most attached to; so ofc they're the ones who can get the strongest reactions out of him #//Diluc genuinely angry; whether at Kae or someone near; is also v likely to make him freeze the ground or smth he's holding #//Same with Jean; he assumes--he has yet to see her actually angry; but he genuinely Fears how it would go #//And the thought alone makes frost spread #//The traveler is depending on what exactly it is they do. Angry with him; it's a chill. Hurt; chill; maybe some frost depending #//Otherwise he's got a good handle on his emotions around them #//Y'know how in Frozen when Elsa froze her own room & then later in the prison when she froze her cell & shit started breaking?#//Yeah; that was what happened the first sleep after The Confrontation and during his stay at the Winery #//Both bc of Diluc lashing out and bc he was finally able to process Crepus' death #//Mans could not sleep Anywhere without the room ending up sealed in ice #//And only got worse each and every time Diluc's Vision flickered and dimmed #//He is thoroughly convinced the fact that he kept it on his person constantly is the reason he didn't get himself sick or worse #//He felt so awful for the staff and Adelinde especially if it got bad enough that she needed to get him to come out so it all could melt #//Or otherwise pull him out of his spiraling so he didn't actually compromise himself; the structure; or anyone else #//Would always act like she needed him to fetch her something; but he Knew. He Knew; and was mortified each and even time #//It got easier to control as the years went by; especially after/whenever Diluc replied to his letters #//But occasionally a particular nightmare would get him. Sometimes does in present day; but he's quicker to recover than back then #//When Jean got sick; her desk space had frost coating it while he worked. And when he heard she disappeared on Barbara?#//He froze and broke her inkwell; his coffee mug; and several pens #//All of which he replaced and swore Noelle to utmost secrecy

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vaugarde · 1 year

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Jumping to Gates, I've always loved the idea of Emolga and Eris growing super close because he helps him figure out how to control his electricity since they're such similar Pokemon

#eris is a wreck as a pikachu he had no idea how to deal with all his energy and it just stressed him out and made him agitated all the time #and he kept getting migraines and sore muscles because the electricity was built up inside of him #emolga sees him and freaks out and doesnt get how eris doesnt know all this stuff cause its usually instinctual #and when he learns he was human hes just like ''ohhhhh. yeah ok''#but he teaches him how to manage his electricity and live with his new body and its nice :)#echoed voice #pmd posting #eris is the only one who has a bad time adjusting out of all my heroes. nuri got over the shock quickly and immediately began planning #and her face is covered so shes just happy about that #rin is SO happy to be a pokemon and she doesnt know why. but shes more concerned about her past than abt her transformation #shes more than happy with it shes so chill and she loves walking on all fours and breathing fire #currently unnamed psmd hero doesnt quiiite count cause theyre actually a reincarnation in my version #the human memories feel very awkward to them when they fade in #if we're counting starfall then finn doesn't adjust well either but hes more scared and resentful than anything #tbh hes in desperate need of a rehaul sjdkflsdjflds

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deadrlngers · 2 years

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me doing completely normal things vs. my mother telling me to not do them since i was 5 y/o bc "that's smth men do"

#rena.txt #well maybe i'm a girl i'm a boy i'm a squid in this giant aquarium called earth!!!!#and i'm talking about such normal things. when i was 5 she gave me shit bc i really liked a movie we had on videotape that in her opinion #was 'for boys'. it's crazy how some things of your childhood stick with u forever it's like i can still hear her say 'you shouldn't watch #that it's for boys'. it was a silly movie about robots or smth like that. and to this day she still gives me shit for my hair and says #they are too short. when i was 17 she said 'with hair like that you look like a boy. no man will ever want you' WHO TF CARES!!!!!#i've been dipping into randomly using he/him in italian for myself lately. he/she/whatever the fuck bc we don't have they in italian. yea #idk what's up with all of that and tbh i'm scared of a journey about discovering gender just as i was scared when i began discovering my #sexuality. like gun pointed at my head if you asked me to pick a pronouns i would tell u to pull the trigger. that's why i don't have any #on my profile/bio but the absence also makes me upset bc then i'm scared that ppl will just assume i use she/her and like. tbh i don't mind #any pronouns but the idea that someone would immediately pick she for me makes me sick. i don't feel like a woman i don't feel like a man i #feel like nothing at all but also much more than the stupid gender binary shit. idk i'm scared of calling myself nb i'm scared of discovery #ok i began crying after typing this i guess that i care about this more than i thought ops lmao

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eggmeralda · 2 years

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day 4 of my friend's girlfriend practically living in our house

#''day 4'' more like month 2 bc this. sudden 5th housemate situation began in november #her house is like 20 minutes away #if they feel the need to be with each other 24/7 can they at least do that at hers for once?#he used to be one of my closest friends but now the last proper full conversation i had with him was probably in like november #i literally live with him but i see him more at uni than i do at home and even then i only get to talk with him briefly #also i signed up to live in a house of 4 not 5 whY IS SHE ALWAYS HERE #even when he's not in the house she's still here?#she literally lives here now i can't deal with it anymore #me and another housemate had to have two separate chats with him about it last month but nothing's changed #and i don't wanna cause more drama by getting annoyed at him so i'm trying to be friendly to both of them #but idk how long it'll last #like surely the food in her fridge has gone off? i wonder if her housemates still talk to her bc i never see any of them together anymore #anyway #ramble

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djarrex · 1 year

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not me spur of the moment thinking up a jedi oc who loosely resembles mila kunis with heterochromia and dark hair who uses a yellow-orange double-bladed split saber

#sigh #she may or not have left the order just before the war began #she also may or not have aided the republic in any way she could while staying under the order's radar #except theyre getting sus and there have been multiple reports from clones stating that there was a rogue force wielder who aided them #maybe. maybe. maybe she and anakin were uhhhhhhh a thing as teens #idk i want some ani angst and cringe #their thing was pre padme of course of course #like pre attack of the clones cringe lmaooo #anyways maybe anakin recognizes her trail #and hes set on proving himself right #maybe rex is sprinkled in there bc i love him and thats reason enough #perhaps she has a soft spot for the clones bc she can recognize their predicament #as in #how theyre unable to escape the hell of a burdon they were created for #as a jedi who left the order #she gets it #and wants to do her part as a citizen #yes she is very much like ahsoka upon leaving #ok I'm rambling at this point #adding shit as i think of it #m's ocs

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