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#should have started that one before now tbh
judithhhh · 3 days
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I was wondering if you could write Jude Bellingham x reader(barca fan)
rivalry (one-shot)
jude x reader
summary : the request!
hala madrid :)
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the excitement you felt for jude after his win against manchester city was slowly fading away as the day of the classico approached. you were always his number one fan, from birmingham to dortmund and now madrid. obviously, as a barcelona fan you were not particularly happy about your boyfriend’s decision to join real madrid but you understood how big of an achievement it was. slowly but surely you found yourself wearing a real madrid jersey way more often that you would have ever thought. the classico was not one of the matches you would go to in the white colors though. even if this decision was not making jude very happy you had still decided to wear a barcelona jersey to the match. it had been an ongoing fight for a week now and even a day before, you found yourself having the same debate with jude just before he left for training.
‘’baby you don't understand, you cannot come to a match wearing a barca jersey when you're dating a madrid player’’
‘’i've been a barcelona fan longer that i've been dating you jude, get over it’’ you said rolling your eyes
‘’well you should have thought about that before dating me’’
‘’i didn't even know you were going to join madrid come on’’ you said a bit louder
‘’we'll talk later, i have to go to training.’’ he responded, too tired to snap back
jude left the house without the usual sweet goodbyes you two shared. you spent the rest of the day mad at him even though a part of you knew he was kind of right. you occupied yourself the best you could all day and left the house just before your boyfriend got back home. you sat in a cafe close to jude’s house and sipped on a teacup until your phone started buzzing.
texts with judee
where are you?
we were supposed to talk when i got back
are u still mad
come back pls love u
you didn't respond but headed back to his house, swallowing back your petty behavior. when you got there, jude was in the shower. you removed your clothes before joining him, making the boy jump at the sudden intrusion. you talked to him normally, like the morning fight had never happened but he just looked at you suspiciously.
‘’you’re not mad anymore?’’
‘’i decided not to, i know barca is going to win no matter what jersey i win’’
the comment made jude chuckle as he tucked you closer to his wet body, his mouth reaching your neck and placing kisses that got lower and lower. when you two were done with your shower and other activities, any bad feelings were entirely gone from your mind.
the next morning, you woke up without jude's presence next to you. looking at your phone, you saw that it was already way past twelve and that the boy had headed out to training some time ago. he hadn't left you any text but when you got up you saw his jersey on the dresser with a note reading "eager to see you wearing that baby, love you xx".
after take a taxi to the stadium, you took a seat in jude's box and hurriedly texted him before he had to come out to train.
texts with judee
good luck today 🥱
btw don't u dare score
ill score and dedicate my celebration to u love
ill rather have you killing me tbh
nvm ill found another girl to do that with
fuck u
love you baby gtg
*you liked the message*
another classico win for madrid and another late winning goal by jude. any other context would have had you screaming and cheering for him but as a barca fan you could just scoff and internally curse your boyfriend for being so good. through the bernabeau’s billboard boards you saw jude’s celebration and didn't miss the smug smile he sent in the direction of the box you were sitting in. you knew you were going to get dragged after today. you hurriedly put on a hoodie, ironically jude’s, on top of the real madrid jersey in hope of at least escaping a bit of jude’s incoming banter.
you waited for him in the hallway next to the locker room not by choice but by obligation, he was still your ride after all. he came out of the room loudly laughing with his teammates before noticing you and murmuring something that made them giggle when they walked past you. jude reached you and pulled you into a hug, which you could not resist returning even though you were mad.
‘’it's such a good day love right?’’ he exclaimed, smiling at you
‘’shut up really’’
‘’aww come on, not gonna congratulate your boyfriend’’ he said clearly restraining himself from laughing in your face
‘’sorry i don't condone cheating’’
‘’nahh don't even start you know that was a fair win’’
you simply rolled your eyes and entered his car, trying to get home even faster. jude didn't say anything else and started driving. halfway through the drive, you realized that he wasn't taking the directions to your flat at all and was actually driving straight to his apartments.
‘’where are you going, you forgot to drop me off?’’ you said
‘’what do you mean, you always stay over after my matches’’ he responded sounding genuinely confused
‘’well, do i look like i wanna stay over today jude’’ you snapped a bit annoyed at his oblivious demeanor
‘’first of all, calm down a bit, yeah. and i understand you're mad about the result but i wanna spend time with my girlfriend so you're coming with me’’
he didn't seem like he was going to take no as an answer and you felt a bit bad for your bitchy attitude so you only turned your head away from him. you heard jude sigh and felt his hand reaching for yours that was resting on your thigh. you allowed him to hold it but didn't make any effort to squeeze it back as you normally would do.
‘’don't even get why you're so mad, baby. you knew barca had no chance of winning this anyways’’
‘’ok this is enough, get me out of this car right now’’ you said giggling, not really taking yourself seriously anymore
jude smiled softly seeing your happy face in the corner of his face. as much as he loved flexing his love for madrid in your face, he still preferred when you were not mad at him. the two of you finished the ride in a mix of stolen kisses at red lights and unserious banter.
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blarshwritezz · 1 day
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Yandere psychopath boyfriend x male reader. You discover that your boyfriend killed people and try to leave the forest where he lived, but you end up being caught by him. He decides to punish you through the bed with rough sex and overstimulation
I fw this
Yandere Psychopath bf x Reader
M yan x M reader
TW - general yandere behavior, NSFW, murder, noncon
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Your boyfriend has always been...strange, but you never expected this. You thought he just liked nature, and that was why he lived in a cabin in the woods. You thought he liked the peace, like you did. That he just enjoyed growing his garden and living practically entirely off the grid. The seclusion...that was a better way to put it.
You couldn't look at him the same since you saw it. Since you saw him killing someone in cold blood. He had the nerve to act so lovingly to you when he did something like that.
You couldn't get it out of your mind. The way that poor man's blood covered him, the pool of red standing the grass and seeping into the dirt. The way he chopped up his victim and stuffed the bits into a bag. The bag he used for his fertilizer.
You clearly weren't safe. You had to leave.
One night, while he was asleep, you snuck out and ran. You ran like your life depended on it. Because it did.
You didn't make it far. A trap. He had traps set up all over the place. A large net caught you, forcing you off the ground. You struggled to get out, but your adrenaline eventually wore off.
You didn't know how long it was until he came along, holding a bloody knife. "Aw, darling, were you trying to get out? I guess that means you know my nasty little secret, huh?"
He cut you out of the net, not giving you a second to even try running before he grabbed you by the scalp and dragged you back, kicking and screaming. "You should know you aren't allowed to run. I'm gonna have to punish you now."
Getting back to the cabin, he forced you upstairs and threw you on the bed. Before you could scramble to get away, he once again grabbed your scalp and forced you to kiss him, shoving his tongue down your throat.
His free hand, still holding the knife he had, cut your clothes off. He finally discarded the knife and started to roughly jerk you off.
He only broke the kiss when you were practically suffocating. "You think you can run away from me, huh? Think you can just leave?" He roughly bit into your shoulder, licking up the blood he drew. "No, I don't think so. You're mine. All fucking mine."
Letting go of your head, he shoved two of his fingers down your throat. "Suck."
When he was satisfied, or tired of it, he yanked out his fingers, only to suddenly shove them deep inside your hole. He stretched you wide, getting your insides nice and wet before suddenly replacing his fingers with his cock.
He didn't waste a second to start pounding into you like a wild beast. He bit you more, leaving bleeding marks all across your shoulders, neck, collarbone, and chest.
"Thought you could get away with trying to leave me, huh?" A harsh smack echoed through the room as he spanked you. "Think you're too good for me or something?" And another. "You're mine." Another. "And I'm going to fuck it into you until you can't even walk out of this room."
He continued to thrust into you, hitting against that special spot harder and harder. He didn't stop, not for a second.
Even when you came, the first time of many that night, he only got rougher.
He didn't give a second of rest, and he wasn't going to. Not until he made you a moaning, sobbing, drooling mess begging for his forgiveness. Then he'd go back to the loving and gentle boyfriend you knew. But only once he was sure you understood not to leave him.
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I feel like the end was a bit rushed tbh
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deluweil · 1 day
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Here's the thing, I have nothing against Lou/Tommy, but the accessive enthusiasm of him returning and everyone already talking about him showing up for next season,
Which if any of you watched for the last 7 seasons, it is very possible because writers love to drag temps over to the next seasons because apparently breakups are for season beginners, mostly (except for taylor),
is very off-putting.
1. Because the dude literally just showed up and they haven't even had one worthy make out session to even call it a situationship.
2. Buck hurt Eddie physically to get into Tommy's mouth and pants, which ruined it for me from the start tbh and Tommy had nothing to do with it, he was just there.
3. Buck has made Maddie's day, his coming out party - that is a big NO in my book. Because one, dude you literally came out, what if you decide eventually that you don't want this or don't want this with this specific first-guy-ever anymore? And two SHE IS YOUR SISTER THE LEAST YOU CAN DO IS HAVE HER LEAVE ON HER HONEYMOON BEFORE YOU KILL YOUR PARENTS OF A HEART- ATTACK.
Even if they "seem accepting" to Buck’s face, this takes time to process, something better revealed in time and in private, once one is sure. Not thinking and talking about this the whole wedding!
And yes, I know, Buck is impulsive, but think for a second, would you want your baby brother to hijacke your wedding after so long of planning it? I know I would have killed him.
Would have told him in advance that if he's bringing his new boyfriend to my wedding, he better tell our parents first. Because this is my fucking day!
I love Buck, but his self-centered personality rubs me the wrong way this season.
Maybe because I wanted to see him growing the fuck up after 7 years and so many traumas and experiences and therapy that he went through, but nope, same old Buck, only instead of the dating the girl who gave him attention, he's seeing the guy who gave him attention.
It's annoying, it's off putting and frankly I am so mad at the writers and Tim for this because these characters deserved better.
And don't talk to me about representation because Shonda did the bi representation in Station 19 perfectly to the point that I was bummed that Travis and Eli didn't end up as endgame even though I loved Emmett with Travis.
Again somehow the 911 writers managed to taint for me what should have been and amazing experience, independent completely of buddie, but no they managed to not only mix Eddie and Buck with Tommy, the whole thing came at the expense of Eddie, physically and mentally, because not only did Buck not apologized to Eddie, Eddie also lost his new friend who now fawns over Buck.
So screw this storyline, I hate it and I hate how everyone is OK with everything that happened in the story, just because Buck is doing a dude(kissing really, there was no doing yet).
There's a lot of blocking in my future, most are just ppl who either came in now because of bi Buck or those who came from other disappointing fandoms and are just here for the rep not the actual story.
But some of us have been here since S1, we want the rep, but we want it to be complimenting, we want to fall in love with the character before it turns into a LI, we want the emotion, the connection, the obvious love building over several years.
Like Casey and Gabby and Severide and Stella, like Maya and Carina, like Travis and Emmett (even though I liked Eli better for him) like Sullivan and Natasha.
I want an emotional payout, give up the surprises, and the wrecked trucks and ships, just tell a good story!
And for the love of all that's holy, enough with the last-minute changes, those never turn out well in the long run. They literally started from scratch when they made the switch between Eddie and Buck.
Also in my opinion, Eddie had a LOT more chemistry with Lou/Tommy than Buck. It would have made so much more sense, in the catholic guilt and internal homophobia department, the nun and supposedly commitment issues was weak at best.
It could have been epic. 😩
And yes, Buck could have started the season single, no harm in that, maybe make him, I don't know, actually growing into something that he would like without someone else to pet his ego? Go back to therapy, work for the LT. exams, be interim captain, realize his worth and learn to love himself for him, not because someone else gave him attention and that made him preen, get him somewhere worthy. Even lessons with Tommy without involving Eddie in this would have been great.
Just something that shows character development, because up until now all I get is S2/S3 Buck and I've seen that movie before, I want my money back.
I realize this is harsh, and normally, I would stick to the light and fun and ignore the rest, but this had to be said out loud so I can go back to that.
That being said, as I said, I will watch Madney wedding purely for Madney. Anything else is just a bonus. I can't wait for that bachelor party and see wth happens to Chimney.
Happy Monday, my loves. ❤️
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I'm rewatching Trollhunters in the background right now, and the disfunctional mother son relationship between Jim and his mom is making me crazy.
Like, he's taking care of the household and his mother for years as a teenager and before probably. She is sometimes giving half hearted comments about him not having to do so much, but very obviously she's not gonna make him stop do all the cooking and cleaning. Y'know. Both because they've been living like this for years, and because it's obviously also very comfortable to have someone do all the house work.
Then Strickler comes into the picture, and if we ignore the whole Troll and changeling side of the story, Barabara gets very offended cause Jim doesn't want her to meet him privately. Again, ignoring the whole magic and trolls stuff, STRICKLER IS JIMS TEACHER. If Jim hadn't figured out that Strickler was a changeling he probably wouldn't have a problem with it, but the fact that he does, no matter the reason, should be enough for Barbara to put a stop to the relationship. Her child is clearly uncomfortable with her seeing/dating that guy, for whatever reason, and even clearly vocalized it. But she doesn't care about, or rather, she tells Jim that she "wouldn't expect something like that" from him. Obviously not, cause she may see him like her child/teenager he is, BUT DOESN'T TREAT HIM LIKE ONE.
And then Jim, unknowingly to Barbara, becomes the Trollhunter, and his behavior changes. He's suddenly doing reckless stuff, sneaking out, getting bruises, landing in detention and even at the police station, barely avoiding a police report. What does she do? Asking him what's going on? If everything's alright at school? If he has any other problems? Maybe trying to lower his workload around the house, which again, he's doing most of that as a teenager and longer probably.
Nah. She doesn't do anything until he lands in the hospital. Except for again, dismissing him rather negatively at the one topic he's openly expressing any negative opinions about (Strickler). And after he lands in the hospital she now starts not asking questions, but demanding answers. Demanding answers from a teenager in a difficult situation who is also now acting much more like a teenager than he ever did before, from her point of view at least. Except she obviously doesn't know how to deal with a teenager, cause she has never had to raise or live with a teenager. She instead lived with a child pretending to be an adult for years, that was partly much more of an adult than she was, who did way to much work even before Jim became the Trollhunter. So she throws punishments at him and grounds him, but does he listen?
No. Cause why should he? Not only is he dealing with things much more important than being grounded, yknow, saving the world, he's trying to protect her from the sheer knowledge of the supernatural and physically protecting her from getting harmed. And again, for the majority of the time since his dad left he pretended to be an adult. He was and is the main adult in the household, dealing with important things she doesn't even know about.
The only one's treating Jim like a teenager are teachers, other children and Blinky and Aaargh sort of when they're not in the middle of Troll business. Strickler, in the first episodes where Jim doesn't know about his true identity, is much more of a parental figure to Jim (also after his redemption later on tbh) than his mother.
In summary: Barbara is treating her son like an adult, almost like a partner, instead of a child/teenager. And when that isn't possible anymore she doesn't know how to properly treat him. She also doesn't really care that her son is uncomfortable with her being around Strickler, or Strickler in general. And it takes Blinky telling her (when Jim is 16) that Jim might be affected by his father leaving when he was five years old.
Jim meanwhile is treating his mother more like a child/teenager instead of the adult and MOTHER that she is. Seeing her as his responsibility. Cooking for her. Cleaning for her. Telling her to rest and take breaks.
They obviously love each other other. And their relationship might not be toxic, but it's very much disfunctional. In a way that is mostly negative for Jim.
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aestheteangel · 11 hours
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Synastry aspects that I personally don’t like.
before i start please read that I am not an official astrologer so take this with a grain of saltttt too haha. Just for fun.
North node square north node ( I’m sorry but everyone lives in a whole different worlds, completely different perspectives, mindset, somehow not letting each other move to the next step)
Chiron in 7th house overlay. ( now Chiron isn’t always bad, but there’s kind of.. pain it gives , it’s not any better in other houses, but I’m saying romantically, there could be hurt during the marriage... if you want Chiron overlays in synastry please lmk)
Pluto/Uranus in 12th house overlay. ( now Mose of y’all know 12th house overlays arent so good eventually, but i think Pluto or Uranus being there could be harsher than any other planet , could indicate so many things, one of them unpleasant endings in the relationship, finding truth about something suddenly, betrayal..in worst cases you won’t be able to forget each other )
Saturn 8th house overlay. (Sure y’all know why..)
Mars conjuct Mc/10th house. ( uhhhh it just don’t give me nice vibes when both are seen in public eye. Could be arguing in public a lot, the mars person makes it hard for the 10th person to forgive them. Works even in composite chart )
Mercury square Saturn. ( a lot of judgements and misunderstandings)
Chiron opposite asc/Venus.
Saturn opposite Neptune. (Broo)
Moon opposite moon. (Now tbh Im not really sure of this one since nobody complained about it and it could indicate “slight” emotional understanding difficulties with each other that can also cause attraction. But I’ve seen this aspect with some couple that really can’t stop hurting eachothers emotionally . )
Another moon aspect, ofc moon is the first thing you should observe In synastry s, it simply represents how each other’s emotions play with the other. now moon square moon. Obviously most of y’all know why, literally each one is on different page when it comes to how they view emotions which makes it pretty hard to understand each other’s feelings with the square aspect. ( believe it or no I have this one with my man, even knowing it I’m still with him lol. yes the attraction is definitely there due to other loving aspects and also with this one, it gives attractive energy yes. but still, he don’t understand my emotions and my point of view, struggles with analyzing me sometimes or what I even think , even when I try my best to throw him an obvious sign about something, without me speaking, he don’t get it where everyone else does same goes for me 🤣😭. he sometimes thinks I mean something the opposite of what I meant. Bottom line is with this aspect you need to speak each other’s feelings and what you want to tell the other cause it’s way too impossible to understand eachother with no words spoken. 😓 AAAA THIS IS THE ONLY STRUGGLING PLACEMENT WE HAVE AND ITS NOT EVEN A SIMPLE ONE)
Mars in 5th house, ( Now this is NOT a red flag, bUTTTT i always read about this placement represents a “not lasting relationship “ and tbh every fling I had I had this placement with, literallyyyy very guy I used to dm or talk to even for a couple of days, attraction at first but then boom, you din yourself not talking to them anymore for god knows what reason lol, so there’s something interesting about this placement. 🤔🤣 ( pink for flings 🤣)
Mars 1st house.... ( uhh you know what? Wait for part 2 😛 )
But before part 2 I’ll make my next post positive I promise, I didn’t even want to write red flags placements because it shouldnt be taken seriously haha. So next post will be about .. hmm wait , what you guys want it to be about?
Synastry observations
Natal chart observations
composite observations
Solar return observations
— Y’all literally if u find one of these placements in your synastrys it’s totally okay lol, I have multiple of these w my man and tbh some of them don’t really play this negative way for us, but i just did them for fun , ofc don’t take these TOO seriously 🥰
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arminswife12 · 2 days
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MATCHING PIERCINGS
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Chris x reader
Warnings: mentions of needles
Summary: Chris and ready get their eyebrows pierced together for vlog.
A/n: guys ik this is bad im BEGGING FOR FEEDBACK PLSSS. Also I don’t see enough Chris fluff. Also this is kinda inspired by Tara yummy’s vid of her getting her eyebrow pierced I just borrowed a few things she’s said about her experience!
I woke up scared and excited I had mixed feelings about the events that were gonna happen in a few minutes. Chris and I were gonna get matching eyebrow piercings but I have a low pain tolerance. I have multiple ear piercings but I’ve passed out for some of them. It wasn’t that bad I’m just scared and excited about it.
Chris and I started getting ready I put on one of Chris’s fresh love hoodies still being able to smell his cologne and I also decided to throw on some black shorts. Today was a Tuesday which meant the triplets were going to film a vlog video. They decided to add Chris and I getting pierced into the vlog.
I was done getting ready so I decided to go into the kitchen of the triplets’ house and I was met with Nick already pointing a camera to my face. “Say hi to the vlog y/n!” I waved at the camera with a smile as I got a Dr Pepper from the fridge. The triplets and I were close especially because I was dating Chris but we were really close before that too. We hung out almost everyday except when they were busy filming and doing other stuff like meeting creators.
I had a platform of my own just not as big as theirs. I am happy with having a small following since people get hated on as a soon and they get a huge following and attention and I wouldn’t have the time to handle that.
“Are you guys ready” I hear from behind me as Matt plays with the keys in his hands. “Yeah I’ll be there in a second!” Chris yells
“So how are you feeling y/n?” Nick asks as he points the camera towards me. “Scared but excited since I’ve been thinking of getting this piercing for a long time and I’m also happy Chris is doing this with me, I have no idea how I convinced him”
“I’m surprised you were able to convince him tbh” Matt lets out with a giggle.
Timeskip
We were on our way to the piercing shop and the reality of what was happing finally set in. Nick was keeping the vlog updated as we were only 4 minutes away from the shop.
Matt pulled into the shop and Nick started vlogging and I waited for Chris to get out the car so I could hold his hand. I clung onto Chris’s side since I was nervous. “Don’t worry I’ll be there the whole time” Chris says. Hearing those words gives me all the comfort I need.
I was first up to get the piercing as Nick was recording and Chris was holding my hand and rubbing my thumb to comfort me. The piercer got all the stuff she needed. “Hi! My names Lily and I’m gonna be your piercer, I’m just gonna talk you through it okay!” She was so sweet and was making me less nervous I closed my eyes as she was feeling my eyebrow “okay breathe in and… out” I did as she said and the needle went through
“Wow you did it!!” Said Nick as he was giggling behind the camera “shut up it’s done??” I questioned since it felt like nothing. “Yeah you’re all done let me just put in your jewelry!” As soon as the jewelery was done I switched spots with Chris now holding his hand for support. Chris went through the same process ans Nick was recording everything up close. “Nick back up!” Chris said as he felt the camera close to his face. We giggled at his comment “Matt you should get a piercing too”
“No thank you my ears are enough” he said with a giggle.
We left the shop and decided to get something to eat since we haven’t eaten anything “we look so cool” I said to Chris as he agreed.
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figureofdismay · 8 months
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i have spent a lot of time lately trying to figure out what Jack's opinion of Hawkeye would be. like. I think at least Sarah would have gotten him hooked on the repeats in the mid to late 80s for the banter (and he'd have a secret crush on Margaret) but especially later Hawkeye got pretty, uh. heavy handed in ways that make him fed up with Daniel...
idk idk this is all for a side detail that will probably be cut but it's interesting to think about how fave characters would feel about other fave characters *as* fictional characters in-universe where the settings allow it 😆
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lunarharp · 5 months
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being attached to that moment qifrey held a baby one time and my ideas for the future :)
#witch hat tag#orufrey#brief small post before i return to Real and Emotional things again...but tbh...this makes me feel real emotions too#i think the manga will end up with a epilogue chapter showcasing little things in the girls' future and orufrey holding hands or kissing...#to like Indicate things. if it doesn't happen beforehand.#But. Who. Knows. also then i suddenly started thinking about them raising a baby for ages today because of how narratively poignant it'd be#for things to end that way after having raised almost-daughters all those years. and how healing it could be for qifrey and etc.#thing i said on twt: girls visit so often that the kid's first words are Professor Olly#“deja vu.. i'm not your professor kid - i'm your father!”#sorry but they are literally a gay couple where one truly is like The Mom and one truly is The Dad. to me#i think a housewifey homemaker type lifestyle would make qifrey happy. be harder now that he's disabled - well that's why he has his man.#i dont normally care about stuff like fankids or whatever..characters becoming parents for real..but like..Come on#This is the couple to think about this with.....they already ARE parents..i want them to be happy for eternity#once all the horrors are over we have to make it there.....children are so precious families are so precious....#i have bad relationship with parents personally and haven't interacted with children in years. And yet i still know that.#the fact that orufrey fight for children to be safe and educated and happy...qif wants to help coustas too..#aaaanyway today was a pretty weird and difficult day so i deserved to think about happy futures for a bit. i hear it's possible#btw i'm most sure about tetia becoming the princess of zozah. i think that will happen. and riche should have the ribbon tassel.
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kyouka-supremacy · 2 months
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Mmmhh...
#(Basically rant on my last two posts)#I know I've said it before and sorry for coming off as annoying–#but I really wish we still had a central bsd blog on Tumblr like fy-bungoustraydogs or bsd-central or things of the kind.#I think now everyone rushes to post news first. And although there's merit to it in knowing news as soon as they happen‚#in the long run the death of this kind of central official content ***fan*** blogs is such a huge loss of fandom spaces‚#especially for the archiving purposes they solved. Especially today that T/witter and G/oogle have basically become unusable.#Literally. Literally. I've been doing official content archiving since I was 11#(because that's the very specific kind of mental illness I have)#and let me tell you that the quality of web search and especially reverse image search only got worse–#in a way that is very evident and noticeable. Which is crazy tbh and not how things should work.#If anyone would like to start a bsd-central kind of blog I'll be the first one to follow.#Actually if anyone actually wants to establish it feel free to contact me and I'll be more than happy to share the resources I have!!!!#It just needs to be something multi-modded for a series of reasons I won't get into right now#I just can't personally do it (not as main admin at least) because that would be modding my FIFTH active bsd blog–#and that's a little too much even for me.#On top of some ethical concerns I have regarding whether it'd be fair for me to mod a fandom central bsd blog–#when I feel like I can't genuinely share the same amount of love for the franchise other fans share#On top of. You know. Getting a degree eventually hopefully.#Then years after the blog has been solidly enstablished and aquired enough credibility it could even open a free donations found to invest–#in buying and scanning and releasing bsd content that hasn't been shared yet like the guidebooks or illustration books or everything else–#for everyone to see...#The dream. (Is realistically never going to happen) (Won't stop me from daydreaming about it every day)#((Still salty I couldn't afford the guidebooks only due to the shipment prices. I *would* have scanned and uploaded them.))#That was a long and idealistic rant. Kyotag out#Edit: *Modding my SIXTH bsd blog#Apparently I mod so many blogs I lost count of them
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blizzardfluffykpop · 21 days
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You sent me an ask so I shall return the favor! What is the most recent Kpop group you’ve gotten into and how did you find out about them? I always love hearing fan “origin stories” lol
Thank you for returning the favor~ That would be The Boyz 🥰💖 I love hearing fan "origin stories" too hehe (This is gonna get long I love them sm)
Anyways I've known about them since debut? I loved Bloom Bloom Pow with my whole heart when it came out and tried to fall for them then- It didn't work. The next time was when The Stealer (TS) came out~ I had watched them perform for Road to Kingdom- because ptg was on the show too- But I really loved TS cb- sm so that I bought the album about 6 mos later with my favorite members as inclusions at the time (Eric, Kevin and Hyunjae). But nothing came about of it even after watching the weekly idol episodes... Then came Whisper era and I ended up biasing Changmin (Q) and loving that song but again nothing came out of it.
(A little backstory is that Changkyun (I.M) got me into Dominic Fike's music-) Thus, when tiktok showed me Juyeon, Changmin, and Sunwoo dancing to Babydoll earlier this year as a dance cover: I fell. And then I finally checked out Watch It~ But Hui had his solo and it distracted me completely from falling further. Then I had gotten sick and decided 'well, what if I watch their content?' And I did... I watched their hello82 interview and their reaction to fanart of them, and lastly their mafia dance. And I loved each sm that I decided to check out more.
It was the first time I had watched their content and wanted to see more. And now, I watch their content almost daily. It's kind of like they revived the joy of kpop for me? My (old) ult of ults has been on hiatus due to the military so it's been stagnant content lately for me. But then they came in like a breath of fresh air- and I simply can't get enough. This month will be 3 mos and I honestly hope I'll follow them for a long time. (I think they're my new ult of ults tbh)
And lastly now here I am as a Younghoon and Juyeon bias (with bias wrecker: Changmin... he's doing everything to be bias again). And with them having a comeback I loved with my whole heart this past month, I think it really solidified them with me. Honestly, I'm so happy with them.
#my 'fan origin story' hehe#lovely mutuals#asks#kate rambles from here#i even started a new kpop journal just dedicated to them and my thoughts- it's a 200 page journal and i have nearly 50 pages about them#and i started it in february ebhbha-#it's so funny because i saw one of my ults' concerts in theater the month before they should have became the ult of ults and here tbz comes#if the theory is true that you fall in love with certain people/groups/things at certain time then that means even when#i wanted to fall in love with them- that i had to wait until now to fall for them even if i wanted to fast forward it- i think now is a#perfect time- it's when i need them most i think- and fuck i could go on about them forever and why they mean sm to me in such little#time but oh how i love these guys-#no seriously everything i wish they could do- i find out they've done or will do- or for like pcs i like them a certain way and by golly#does yh do my favorite poses- and their music is just ?!?! i love it sm- ofc i've listened to them before a lot but ?? it's my speed rn#kate rambles#did i drag my close friend into them too? yes- yes I did- but she had full free will- she could have stayed on the happy mbb boat instead#of jumping into the water and swimming to lip gloss island with me- but alas she didn't so it's even more fun cause i get to be a new#deobi with her- and it's literally the best experiance i could have ever asked for- she prolly won't see these (i'm banking on it) and#honestly i'm so thankful for her- for joining me in this 'insanity' we've gotten ourselves into- i'm glad we were both stolen from our mbb#home together- it's sm fun to talk about tbz with her- because she's experiencing them new just like i am- i could go on here too#but i won't- so i'll stop here- i love these boyz sm tbh (every time i say it even if it's a lot- it doesn't feel enough)
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raveartts · 11 months
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I still don't know what i'm doing with her stupid design T_T
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andromeda3116 · 10 months
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boy i love getting tipsy and then drunk and gushing about my special interest to people who cannot possibly care about this even half as much as i do and being deeply annoying and embarrassing myself and wanting to crawl into a hole once the harsh light of sobriety hits
#like i cannot stress enough that i want to die right now#it's not a physical hangover it's a mental hangover. a ''why am i incapable of shutting the fuck up'' hangover.#i become so deeply annoying when drunk that i should not be allowed to use my phone#i turn into the goddamned boom de yada commercial and inflict it on everyone in range#like i go off about the discworld series a LOT#one time at a party i cornered two guys who had no science background and tried to explain how avogadro's number was found#i gush about fullmetal alchemist or the story structure of everything everywhere all at once#i cry over interstellar or the cosmos series#my friends and family back home all already know this and give me their ''sure thing sarah now let's get you to bed'' looks#too few people here have been exposed to this to yet know how to stop it#eta: i should also stress that when i discovered that said guys did not know what vsepr theory was my reaction was not to stop#it was to get a piece of paper and start explaining lewis dot structures#eta again: you know after considering this long-standing history of doing this i feel paradoxically less embarrassed#like it will be very funny to explain the avogadro's number story and all the things i have done this about#like look i'm sorry i hit you with my special interest gushing but i have done this many times before to many people#the ''drunk!sarah highbeams of random essays and lectures'' is well-established and tbh kind of a rite of passage at this point
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bro he is literally just laying there saying whatever in their head talking about anything and everything but not sleeping.
#thinking about junior high#specifically it started with me saying i should relearn the clarinet i should get one again#then somehow to getting stuff i missed from teachers 'before or after class' because they were busy or i didn't want to be late for class#then to how i was usually on time so i had like no reason to worry#except for pe because i had math all the at the bottom of the junior high hallway then pe at the entire other end of the school#and we had to change but he was pretty lenient and i was usually one of the first kids out#also how most of us left our stuff in the locker room and not the lockers because they were a hassle and somehow we never had any theft#then i thought about how this kid next to my actual locker in fifth grade (no locks) took one of my pokemon magnets im pretty sure#and i never got it back#then i remembered another thing that happened in the fifth grade hallway#where that guy i had a crush on gave me a golf ball he found in his bookbag#well he asked if i wanted it and i said yes (like having things and liked him) and im pretty sure it stayed in my bookbag the entire year#if i knew which bookbag i used that year and if i still had it it might still be in there tbh#also when i was thinking about band i couldn't think of my study hall in 8th because i quit and then suddenly i membered#and idk how i forgot she was like my fav teacher and i had so much fun cus my 2 best friends (like the waterparks song?) were also in it#and since it was like the end of the day she let us like talk and mostly do what we wanted if we didn't have any late work#and me and andi probably spent like 75% of it doodling our little oc guys#i think our other friend spent a lot of it drawing aswell.#wait. now that i think about it. was she in our study hall? doubting myself all of a sudden.#yeah she was because we walked home together and i dont remember waiting in the hall for her or anything#i do remember that when me and her were still in band andi came and got us basically because we always took our time#i miss them :(#winona has something to say
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simplyghosting · 7 months
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Amber fog
amber - share an unpopular opinion that you may have
Well the current one in my family rn is that i don't need to go back to therapy lol
fog - how well do you think you'd do in a zombie apocalypse scenario?
while i'd like to say I think i would be a good basic medic because i'm not squeamish and usually get asked anyway to deal with any blood/gross stuff at home and i have decent aim to get some ranged shots in for temporary defense-
but most likely i'd be buy-us-some-time zombie chow (╥﹏╥)
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astrxealis · 1 year
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okay i'll seriously stop now (just a maybe) anyways please get into milgram listen the songs watch the mvs and all! <3
but just to ramble a bit: fuuta really is. so similar to the viewers/es
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#⋯ ꒰ა milgram ໒꒱ *·˚#he's a twt user and kinda chronically online LMAOOO okay but to be serious. he doesn't really realize the#real world consequences of his actions until it's too late. and in the mv he so obviously shows regret and all#there's a scene where he's looking at his self from before doing the spraypaint again and tbh yeah dudes sadistic w that kinda thing#sadistic but in sort of a good way in a sense that he wants to deliver justice. but then things escalate too far as well#<- probably starts calling out people for the smallest things. not anymore about justice#or it still is about justice but even in the littlest of things... anyways yeah he likely starts it but then the others r the ones#who put more flame to the fire. i think he has problems w attention too so this kinda yk. makes him feel seen... or idk how to phrase it#bcs dude spends most of his time online right? the whole gaming thing might be an escape from reality in that he#likely doesn't have much friends if any at all (he also doesn't really get along w anyone in the prison. but i think he is a good person bc#he cares for haruka bcs hes younger). hmm. fuuta knows what's the deal with milgram#anyways yeah i think it is all just so interesting. he's definitely regretful and feels guilty and also... he's hinted at stuff#uhm. worrying. stuff. if yeah? idk how to phrase it but i think it is safest to really vote him innocent (also he deserves it imo)#he still needs to improve w some stuff but then again i dont think we should be Extremely Harsh#yk scruntinizing everything. voting him guilty again for a 'small' yk. not that what hes doing is negligible but i mean that he's#starting to improve (even if his... mental state is getting worse it seems) and it feels wrong and is exactly what he calls out#es/the viewers for if we vote him guilty for the smallest of mistakes/injustices even when he's yk. getting 'better'#sorry for terrible explanations here i hope it makes sense oml#i dont think fuuta meant anything bad fr. and then the drama audio w es like... agh wait im putting that aside for now bcs goddamn#i think there's smth to do w. Pressure. ofc. duh. LMFAO. maybe peer pressure to join in the cyberbullying#he likely didnt mean for it to escalate but maybe he started losing himself in it all w a sort of hero complex#ahhh trying to tie together stuff from the 1st trial and 2nd trial is complicated bcs the two have similar but different themes
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ko-eko-ev-go-ms · 1 year
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Brain is braining too much me thinks
#thoughts#oni talks#oni vents#I feel like I’m being torn between 2 futures and I know one isn’t really realistic and is a thing of the past but it’s also like#not only does it feel like giving up but it also feels like I’d have to face the fact that I can’t go back and unexperience some things#that changed me as a person and I know me wanting to go down that path is me trying to go back to when I first started feeling hope for#life again (if I ever had that tbh) & it’s meant so much to me for so long and like I know that I 100% would not be able to have achieved#any of what I’ve achieved now if I hadn’t started that first path. the fact that the second one is even an option is because of the first.#I also wonder how much is on me & it compounds in the severe regret I’ve been having about some recent stuff in my life along with recurrent#realizations and nightmares of the past haunting me & just. it’s so painful I know maybe I’m being dramatic and there’s a possibility that#in the future if it will work out and I can have my cake and eat it too but I genuinely don’t know how realistic that is to achieve#I want to be able to recapture the feelings I had before but there are certain experiences that so thouroughly crushed the person I had#finally begun to build up that I don’t know if that’s truly possible & if I just have to accept that I need to change to face who I am now#I’ve been really stuck recently when it comes to getting better and I know why but I’ve also blocked out so much of it that it’s just like#hard to even work through things you just want to forget and act like they never happened because that’s easier & logically I know it doesnt#work that way but it still feels painful. I feel the weight of my mistakes on my shoulders again. & it’s been resulting in what I know is#a lot of self sabotage & I feel like I should be better than this but I’m not I feel like I’ve regressed & like it wasn’t that long ago that#I literally felt like I was a kid again it was so surreal and strange & gross & I just hate so much of what’s happened in my life but I also#know there’s a lot of good that’s come from it & so it’s hard to process all these awful things when I know if they weren’t there the stuff#that I do love wouldn’t be either. it’s really hard to hope for a future I’ve never experienced. I’ve been meeting so many new people & its#reminded me of how anxious I actually am as a person bc normally I don’t have to face that bc I am by myself or in specific scenarios I’ve#cultivated to be tolerable & i feel like I keep learning things about myself or my experiences that I just don’t want to learn or to exist#& it’s frustrating bc there’s also so much pressure not just from myself but other ppl that I want to be able to pull through & do things#I know are probably not the most realistic but then a part of me is angry at myself at being a coward & wondering if I’m just awful & broken#I’ve been trying to fight back in what ways I can and the results have (usually) been really good but they come with their own prices#I hate how easy it’s become to simultaneously prefer escapism while not feeling like things are bad enough or that there is no escapism#I hate that I keep having moments where I get things and then I just fall again & Ik I’ll get there eventually but I’ve lost so much hope#that I don’t know if it’s even possible to ever get back. the last year or so is just so many ups and downs and new things and idk#I feel so torn because this is a future I foresaw and even wanted at some point and now it feels so heavy & costly & I just feel#like I’m evil & irredeemable or smth & every time I get told the opposite a part of me immediately can’t accept it especially
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