#smol angry prowl

[kairukitsuneo]

My Big heart embrace your hurt

[writingonscrappaper]

WIP Excerpt

I will forever be a fan of the trope Tol & Smol, but I love it even more when the Tol is the peaceful, happy one, and the Smol is the indignant ball of rage and fury that can break you in half.

Obviously this is one of the main tropes I have centered my current WIP around. I love my tiny, angry werewolf lady with her six foot healer lady

~~~~~

The sound of pain Rowan let out as her hands pressed against her broke her heart. She pushed the numbing magic into the burns as quickly as she could manage, whispering more and more apologies and words of comfort. Assuring her that everything was going to be fine.

Glancing up at Rowan’s face to make sure she was still awake as the quiet stretched between them, her gaze lingered on a deep cut that ran from the corner of her nose and down over her upper lip. “…thank you.” She whispered, offering a sad smile in response to the confused look Rowan gave her. “You said these two were watching my home. Something tells me they weren’t waiting around for a friendly conversation.”

Rowan suddenly refused to meet her gaze, and that just confirmed it for her. “Elias isn’t one to let go of a grudge.” The wolf grumbled after a pause. “Just healing me would have been enough to put you into his bad books, but you had to go and punch him. To stop him from killing me.” 

It seemed to take effort for the wolf to look at her, and the serious look in her eyes had Argent’s smile fading. “You’re right. Those two weren’t just keeping an eye on you on his behalf. I heard them talking. They were going to drag you off to whatever nest he’s dug himself into at the moment, as soon as they got word from him.”

That little revelation had a chill skating up Argent’s back.. “Guess it’s good they’re dead.” She said in a hushed voice, watching the skin on Rowan’s chest slowly recover. “Were they the only ones?”

“I think so, though there’s no way to know for sure… Elias is persuasive, but he doesn’t tend to have a large crowd following him. It’s no reason to be careless, of course. He’ll come back eventually, intending to finish everything. For now, though, you should be alright.”

“We should be alright.” Argent corrected, managing a smile as Rowan cast her a skeptical look. “Elias isn’t in town, and his flunkies are taken care of. That means you can breathe now too.” 

The head shake that Rowan gave her earned a disapproving look from the healer. “Oh, don’t tell me you’re going to spend the entire time he’s gone prowling the streets, looking for anyone else that’s working for him.”

“Well, what else am I supposed to do? Sit and twiddle my thumbs, waiting for someone to kick in my door? Just because Elias doesn’t have a lot of people at his beck and call at one time doesn’t mean those two are the only ones. And I have to find out where he’s gone off to.”

“You can sleep.” Argent snapped, fighting the desire to shake the wolf who was glaring at her. “You can slow the hell down. Take a nap. Visit the beach. Go at least four days without getting a life threatening injury.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry that I’ve been messing up your schedules and wasting your time with my wounds..” The shifter snarled. “But I don’t get the luxury of slowing down. Until I feel Elias break between my jaws, I don’t get to stop.” 

“Why is all of this on your shoulders? I can tell you and Elias have history, that was made clear when I saw him trying to snap your neck. You’re acting like it’s down to you and only you to take him out.”

She watched Rowan rile up, inhaling with what was likely the intention to rip her a new one, but she seemed to change her mind mid breath, looking away and glaring at the shredded hole in her pants. When Argent got nothing but sullen silence from her, she sighed, turning her attention back to the receding burns.

The healer had never had the skill to hold onto her anger. Not unless it was over someone she cared for being hurt or insulted. That anger grew complicated when the thing that was hurting the person they cared about was the person themselves. And sure, she’d only known the shifter for a few days, but that was all it had taken for Argent to become invested in her wellbeing. 

“I think I understand… to an extent.” Argent eventually spoke up, her voice quiet. “Whatever is going on with you and Elias, you’re trying to prevent anyone else from getting hurt. At whatever cost it takes on your part.” 

Staring at the cut carved across Rowan’s mouth, one hand lifted from her chest, reaching towards the wound slowly and stopping a full hand’s span away. Giving the woman plenty of time to refuse the touch. Rowan hadn’t flinched away at least at the movement of her hand, but the healer had been able to see her shoulders grow tense. 

Eventually the tension drained from her and she leaned towards her hand, nodding faintly. Argent cupped her cheek gently, pressing her thumb against the bottom of the cut and stroking slowly up the length of the wound. Watching the skin close and heal over. 

“That’s an admirable, but really stupid decison.” She muttered with a sigh. Eventually her eyes flicked from the healed wound to Rowan’s gaze, feeling her heartbeat spike as she saw the wolf’s grey stare locked on hers. 

Swallowing nervously, she cleared her throat and dropped her hand, turning her attention back to the burns. Doing her best to keep from becoming flustered over the fact that her stunt with the vampire had left her pretty much barechested. And Rowan wasn’t exactly… small. 

It was fine. She was a healer. She was a professional. 

Another quick glance at Rowan’s face revealed the wolf watching her with a look Argent would almost dare to call fond, if exasperated. The look had heat flaring vividly across her face, and she gave a shaky smile in return. 

She’d take that as a sign that she’d at last worn the shifter down enough to consider Argent someone to be trusted. Something she suspected was another small but hard earned victory regarding the woman.

Argent was dizzy and nauseous by the time the last of the burns closed over. The leg wound alone had consumed a decent chunk of her strength, but the burns had been severe, and had covered so much skin… 

She knew the warning signs that she was reaching the last dregs of her strength, but she couldn’t leave the remaining wounds just because they weren’t life threatening. Shallow or not, they were still wounds. They still caused pain. And she couldn’t leave someone in pain. 

Ignoring the feeling of her skull seemingly splitting in half, Argent pushed on. She managed to close up a third of the remaining cuts and bites before Rowan took hold of both her wrists and literally stopped her. Reminding her of the first time she’d healed her.

“Are you trying to make sure I genuinely do have to carry you home?” The wolf scolded in a quiet voice. 

“You’re gonna be sleepy too in a little while, after that much healing.” Argent retorted, though she couldn’t help letting her head drop forward to rest against Rowan’s newly healed collarbones. Closing her eyes as she fought back another wave of sickness. 

“Yes, but something tells me between the two of us, I’m better and functioning in such a state than you are.” 

Grumbling quietly, (and keenly aware of the fact that Rowan was still holding her wrists) Argent took in a slow breath before sitting up and offering a tired smile to the other woman. The concern that was on the wolf’s face steeled her resolve and she pulled gently at her wrists. “I’m fine. We should get moving now. Get you home before you pass out.”

Rowan’s grey eyes narrowed, the only warning Argent got before suddenly the entire world was moving. By the time things stopped spinning and she got her bearings again, she was staring wide eyed up at the shifter, who was now on her feet and holding Argent bridal style in her arms. 

“I should be the one saying that to you.” She grumped. “You are not dragging my ass all the way across town to my place when you look like standing on your own two feet is a herculean effort.”

“Aww… you just don’t want me to know where you live…” Argent huffed, unable to keep from giving the woman a slightly loopy grin. “Cause you know I’d show up without warning with a bunch of snacks and movies to make sure you took a day off for once.”

“Yeah, colour me not surprised in the slightest that crashing my home with food is what you would choose to do...” Argent heard her grumble as she adjusted her hold on the healer. A giggle left her, earning a side eye from the wolf. “...what?”

“I wish I could see what this looks like from someone else’s point of view… you carrying me.” That earned a sharp snort from Rowan as the woman started walking. 

“You may be almost a full foot taller than me but you feel about as heavy as those foam pillows you’re so damned attached to.” Argent heard her mutter, earning another giddy laugh from the healer.

[dreadwings-big-fat-spike]

SEIGE CHARACTER REVIEWS PART ONE

Optimus- Stupid fuck, but not in the gay way. He's just a moron. Bitch should've listened to his brain cell wife.

Elita-1- The only one with a brain cell. Exasperated mom. Has a weird relationship with OP.

Wheeljack- Bill Nye but gay.

Bumblebee- Sassy cunt. Had a good memory then lost it. Knows some shady af people.

Cog- Turns into BIG GUN.

Mirage- Good at hiding shit. Want's to fight Ratchet's fanboy.

Sideswipe- Generic young Autobot 1.

Ultra Magnus- "I wAnt PeACe" *fucking dies and has his corpse used against everyone*

Prowl- Smol. Has a bomb in his head.

Ratchet- Done with OP and Megan's shit. Has his boyfriend die.

Impactor- Angry. Wants to fight you. Won't fight you because Ratchet turned him into a raging homosexual. Dies in his husband's arms.

Moonracer- Get's fucking mutilated. Femme side character 1.

Arcee- Is pink. Femme side character pt 2.

Chromia- Has guns go pew pew. Femme side character pt 3.

Ironhide- HONEY YOUR vOICE NO

Skyfire- *busy yeeting Starscream into the distance*

CONCLUSION

All the Autobots are Chaotic Stupid except for Ratchet and Elita.

[coeurdastronaute]

Essays in Existentialism: Heartbeat

In a heartbeat the short film... that in an au where your heart literally chases after the person you love. Imagine that with smol lexa being all what is an emotion but her heart is all !!! every time clarke is around. Also pls have it in the canon universe cause that would be a lot more hilarious if the commander of 12 clan's heart is constantly chasing after the commander of death

The rain was not going to interrupt training. It didn’t matter that the world was sloshing full of mud and everything was drenched through completely. The initiates stood at stance one and waited for the signal to attack, defend, and parry. 

Even so young, Lexa was deemed a favorite for the conclave. Agile and fast, smart and fierce, she exhibited all of the traits of a good and just ruler. But as the signal went, she proved to those who watched why she was a force to be reckoned with, laying her opponent flat on their back in a matter of seconds and with such dexterity, it was as if she was the rain, moving so quickly, so naturally. 

“Lexa, good,” Anya muttered, looking down over her cheekbones as she surveyed the other fights. 

With the smallest of grins, the girl of eight nodded and extended her hand to help her partner up from their back in the mud. 

“Prepare to go again,” Titus yelled over the rain from his booth above the training grounds. 

Lexa didn’t move to push the water out of her eyes, nor did she hear anything other than the beat of her heart in her ears as she sized up her next opponent. Each fight was a matter of life or death to her. That was how she was going to win the entire thing per her plan, because she very much did not want the alternative. 

The horn sounded and she prepared again, though this time, something caught the corner of her eye as she dodged an attack from the larger boy opposite her. And she couldn’t hear her heartbeat a second later. Three seconds later, she was on her back, wheezing out a sigh as she had the wind knocked out of her. 

“That seems to be enough for the moment. Break out and prepare for study,” their teacher said, dissatisfied to see his star pupil fail. 

Lexa accepted the hand given to her by her partner, and when she came up, she looked around to see what had ruined her perfect record. Not by her choosing, her feet followed the sight of stark yellow hair, peaking occasionally through the stalls in the market. The nghtblood found herself ducking baskets and weaving through legs and arms laden with goods as she followed the only color that appeared in the haze of the dreary day. 

And then it was gone. 

Lost to the crowd and unknown to her, she felt her heartbeat pick up, tapping excitedly, as if it were trying to beat its way out of her chest completely. But she turned around, ready to return to her lesson, slightly afraid of what Titus might--

She made it two steps of not paying attention to smack into the most wonderful pair of blue eyes she’d ever seen in her whole life. 

Nose to nose, the two children stood there. The only movement that was made was by Lexa to put her hands over her chest to keep her stupid heart from jumping out completley. It strained there, drawn to this stranger who furrowed and smiled. 

“Hi.” 

“H-h-hi,” Lexa managed, somewhat cross-eyed at the proximity. 

“Are you training to be commander?”

“Yes.” 

“That’s cool.” 

Lexa gulped and nodded. 

“I have to go. We have a long trip back to Arkadia. It was nice to meet you. I hope you win.” 

“Thanks.” 

With another second between them, the littler girl pushed past the gawking initiate in search of her parents that called her to them again. Lexa turned on her heel to watch the yellow hair disappear into the crowd again. 

XXXXXXXXXX

Over the years, Lexa sees the strange girl with the pretty yellow hair out from time to time. And without fail, she follows her at a distance, looking for a way to speak to her, but never knowing what to say. 

There was the time when Lexa caught her during a lesson, and asked to be excused, following her as she looked through the market. And there was the time she was at a ceremony, and the yellow hair wove through the crowded street, and Lexa ran down fifty flights of stairs just to lose her completely. There was the time they went to Arkadia as a unity meeting, and Lexa fell off of her horse when she saw the familiar face who furrowed and looked at her in the mud, offering a hand to help her up. 

It never ended well, Lexa realized, and yet her feet kept carrying her forward. And she couldn’t stop her heart from doing flips when she met a stranger. 

Freshly fourteen, Lexa was undefeatable in combat with her peers. She was gangly and smart, angry at the world and unable to focus on much of anything. It felt as if it’d always been that way, but she remembered a time of not feeling like she wanted to get hurt in combat. 

The sky was angry and hot, the sun burning through the trees as she set out on her hunt. Sweat pooled on her shoulders and back as she prowled through the woods in search of an offering for the festivities. 

Halfway through, the sound of hooves in the distance, and the deer she was tracking lifted it’s head and ran off while Lexa looked over her shoulder. Despite herself, she moved toward the noise of the people, following the group undetected. Skycru insignia were on their shoulders, and they moved without the grace of someone who was used to the ground. 

Annoyed as she was at having to restart, Lexa waited for the group to pass so she could resume but they slowed as they approached the stream, and as she circled toward the other side of the lake, a familiar stock of blonde hair moved through the green. 

“I’m going to take the long way around the lake,” the voice called. 

“Be safe. Take a radio, Clarke.” 

Clarke. That was the name attached to the voice and the eyes and the hair. The hunting trip was forgotten as Lexa followed along toward the lake and the figure that kept her up at night. She hadn’t meant to, but it felt as if she was being tugged in that direction. She paused when Clarke did, peering out from behind a fallen tree trunk. 

When the girl she was following turned around upon hearing a noise, Lexa hid, her heart beating in her ears, waiting a few moments to follow as Clarke made it to the lake where she paused and took off her shoes and then her shirt and Lexa was certain her skin was going to melt off. 

Clarke took a few steps out toward the water before she jumped, disappearing for a moment and reappearing a little bit further. This happened a few times until she walked back to the shore and took a seat on a long rock, drying in the sun. 

Lexa looked at her shoulders, already pealing from a previous tan. She looked at her hair, a lighter yellow than before. She looked at the skin exposed and glowing, shimmering with the droplets--

The crack of a stick below her feet made Clarke sit up and look toward her. Half out of the treeline, Lexa froze, unsure of how she’d moved so close. 

“I didn’t know anyone else was out here.” 

“I’m sorry,” Lexa offered quickly. “I didn’t mean to startle you.” 

“You’re the girl, from the horse.” 

Her face squinched up as she surveyed the newest arrival to the beach. 

“Lexa.”

“What are you doing out here? Isn’t there a festival this week in honor of the commanders who have come before?” 

“Hunting. I was hunting, to offer to the spirits,” she managed, watching as Clarke swung her legs over and stood there in just her shorts and a bra. It was hard to think of much else. 

“Are you hunting me?” 

“No, no, of course not. I didn’t-- I just-- I was moving toward the base of the mountain, there’s a spring there, and I was hoping one of my traps-- No, no. I wasn’t.” 

Clarke eyed her suspiciously before moving to slide on her shirt. She had a smile that made Lexa’s heart stop.

“Are you going to be the next Commander?” 

“I think so,” Lexa nodded, swallowing with the realization, unable to do much else because her chest was constricting and practically pulling her closer though her feet, graciously, remained steady and rooted at the edge of the forest. “I have to go now.” 

Before she could hear a response, Lexa turned on her heel and bolted back the way she came, sprinting as fast as she could away from the lake, away from the girl who now had a name, away from the weird way her heart was lead and then lighter than clouds, and then beating so fast it was silent, and then thumping in her ears so loudly it was deafening. She ran as far and as fast and as long as she could before she stopped, in a very different forest, doubling over, she sat down on a rock on the edge of a clearing and tried to catch her breath. 

XXXXXXXXX

Newly inaugurated as the proper Commander, Lexa sat on her thrown and took a deep breath, the power of her new position heavy on her shoulders. Thirteen years, she’d been the person who trained for this, and she’d never imagined it’d actually happen. It was always such an abstract idea, that she wasn’t sure what it all meant, just that she was ready. 

“The ambassadors are assembled, Heda,” Titus interrupted her meditation. 

Slowly, she opened her eyes and took a deep breath before nodding for them to be let in.The wisdom of the commanders coursed through her, and there was much to be done. The celebrations would come soon enough; for now, she was ready to prove her worth all over again to the people she needed to understand it. 

The ambassadors of the Twelve Clans filtered into their seats on the council, their handful of attaches quietly huddling behind them. When the last clan entered, Lexa gulped. 

She had done her best not to think about Clarke. It wasn’t easy,e specially in the days following the lake, but days grew into months, and when Lexa saw a familiar shade of blonde move around her orbit, she refused to follow. She held her heart in her hand and she squeezed and compressed it until it was the size of an arrowhead. She took that tiny, unrecognizable and achy thing, and she locked it in a metal box. She put that box under a boulder that no man could move. 

But now the boulder rattled slightly in her chest as she caught Clarke’s eye across the room and cursed that Skycru would be sitting on her left, the closest of any other clan. Clarke smiled at her and stood behind the chair of her people quietly. 

“Thank you for coming,” Lexa began after a few seconds. “I have been left with the monumental task of ensuring this coalition survives and keeping it strong. I count on each of the twelve clans to stand behind me now.” 

There was a rattle of approval from the people who already loved her. She nodded and held up her hand for their quiet. 

“We will be finally dealing with the question of Skycru. It is my goal to strengthen us, and to do that would mean to bring them in as the thirteenth clan, if they can agree to follow our laws.” 

She turned her look onto the ambassador and waited for him to speak. 

“We want nothing more than to become productive, helpful neighbors to our fellow man,” Marcus explained. “You honor us with your consideration.” 

“Heda, surely you can’t allow--”

“Aren’t you sick of war, Ambassador?” she interrupted. “I am. We’ve lost so much. We’ve lost people and time killing each other.” 

Without meaning to, she looked over at Clarke and she felt the boulder crack and the little metal box start to shake. 

“I was taught that love is weakness, but in reality, love is what defines all of our choices. It is what starts wars, and pride refuses to let us end them, but I do not want to spend my time as Commander responsible for so much death.”

“We have our ways, Heda.” 

“And I mean to honor them. It’s time for us to prosper and build a great world,” Lexa explained, looking at Clarke for a moment too long. The metal box was opened and she felt her chest flutter about as her heart stretched it’s legs. 

The chorus of people in her room murmured their approval, or at least their moderate acceptance of her plans. 

“We will perform the ceremony after my ascension festivities and Skycru will take the brand of the coalition,” Lexa decided. “For now, Skycru is in Polis under my protection as my guests.” 

“But, Heda-- the law states that any not in the coalition are due out by sunset.” 

“Skycru is here under my protection,” she repeated herself. “Disregard for my word is treason. We welcome them by showing them what our lives look like. I hope you find yourself comfortable in the city.” 

With that and little else, Lexa stood and walked through the hall, out of the door before nearly every one of her ambassadors could stand. It took all of her being to not turn around and see Clarke, but instead, she let the doors close and walked quickly to her room. 

XXXXXXXXXX

The city was alive with celebrating the newest ascension. They clamoured and sang and drank and toasted to many years of peace and prosperity, to their new Heda, to the new lives they hoped to lead. Below her room, the torches burned and the party continued, destined to last until the morning, though she chose to bow out as early as respectable. 

With a sigh, Lexa looked down at the glowing streets and listened to the laughter and music that was carried up to her on the wind, and she smiled. 

At the feast, she saw Clarke and smiled, but did nothing else. She was able to keep her heart under control for at least a few hours, which was a sign. She thanked the spirit of the commanders for helping her grow, and hoped it wouldn’t always been this rough. Surely her heart would tire itself out crushing on a complete stranger. 

“No more, Titus,” Lexa sighed, heavy and tired as a knock sounded at her door. “The world will be here in the morn--”

“I’m sorry to interrupt, Heda.” 

Smiling and standing in her room, Lexa looked frantically at her guard, self-conscious that she was just in her sleeping clothes, her armor discarded for the day. She needed something to protect her from Clarke. 

“She came with the word of the Ambassador,” her guard explained. 

“No, no, thank you, Jax,” Lexa nodded with a furrow, waiting for him to close the door behind him. 

“I didn’t get a chance to say hello at the party.” 

“I’m sorry. I had to speak with-- You wanted to say hello?” 

“Yeah, I remembered you. So much has happened, but we’ve run into each other before.” 

Lexa took a step forward despite herself. She felt like she could see her stuipd heart tugging her toward Clarke. She very much wanted to be in her throne, where she couldn’t move. 

“Yes, at the lake,” Lexa nodded. 

“It was before that,” Clarke explained. “I don’t know if you remember. We were kids. You had the same warpaint then. I spent weeks playing and putting in on with old oil or grease, or whatever I could find.” 

That was it. Lexa felt her heart doing backflips in her chest at the idea of Clarke wearing her warpaint. She wanted to see it. She wanted to touch her cheek and lips. She cleared her throat to get a hold of herself, pressing her hand to her chest and letting it drop a second latter. 

“I think I remember,” Lexa nodded. 

“You were following me at the lake a few years ago. I remember that. And then you ran away.” 

“I had to finish preparing my offerings.” 

Clarke eyed her, trying to decipher something and failing. Instead, she took a deep breath and a step forward, making Lexa retreat one step. 

“You left your own party.” 

“I, um. I was tired.’ 

“Are you tired now?” 

“No. Not at all.” 

“I didn’t get a chance to give you my offering.” 

“Skycru has already performed the--” Lexa watched Clarke take another step forward and she remained rooted. Her heart was thumping in her neck and she was afraid that her head was going to explode. She felt like her skin was on fire. 

“Every time I’ve met you, you look like you have something you want to say but can’t. Will you tell me what you’ve been holding?” 

“Nothing.” 

It was instantaneous that she uttered the response, prepared to die with all of the things left unsaid. That was easier, and for a moment she let herself consider the merits of war as memory-eraser. 

“”I won’t say anything. Just say it quickly and then I can give you a present.” 

Clarke got her a present. Lexa was the commander of twelve, soon to be thirteen clans, and she felt her body shiver with the idea that Clarke thought about her. 

To her credit she debated what to say before deciding that she was the commander and she could do whatever she wanted. So she set her back and shoulders, squared her feet, and met Clarke’s eyes. 

“The first day I saw you, I felt this… I felt like my heart was drawn to you. It pulled me through the market until I met you. And every time after that, when I’d see you somewhere, my whole body feels like it’s on fire. I saw you at the lake, and Id idn’t mean to walk toward you, but again, i couldn’t help it. I don’t know how to make it stop, despite my best efforts.” 

“Wow.” 

“Yes, I know--”

Clarke smiled and pressed her palm on Lexa’s chest, careful to feel the heartbeat growing in that exact spot. She looked at her hand and smiled, pressing there with a little bit of pressure. 

“It feels like it’s going to beat out of your chest.” 

“It might try,” Lexa confessed sheepishly. The blush crept up her neck to her ears. She wasn’t sure why Clarke brought her hand up and placed it on her own chest, but Lexa looked at her palm as it sat on this girl’s chest. She felt a familiar and loud and fast racket. 

It took a few moments for Lexa to compute it all, but eventually she realized what it meant. 

“You felt it, too?” 

“I don’t know what it means,” Clarke shook her head. Lexa just smiled back a her. 

“Yes you do.” 

Both stood there, hands feeling each other’s hearts beat wild, steady rhythms against their rib cages. Lexa took the time to meet Clarke’s eyes and she stared so intensely, Clarke looked away, a blush on her cheeks. 

“I’m not going to--”

Before Clarke could finish, Lexa leaned forward and kissed her. Pressed her lips to hers and held them there, afraid to move any other part of her body, but her neck craning forward. It too a few seconds, but much to her relief, Clarke kissed her back, hands wrapping around her neck and shoulders, pressing her body against her own. 

“Wow,” Lexa sighed and chuckled. 

“I agree.”

[ace-beef]

Jedi Cats AU

Y’all ready for this shit? An AU where Obi Wan Kenobi has to look after some cats while he’s doing Jedi Stuff. These four cats are: Anakin, Qui Gon, Padme, and Ahsoka. 

It’s kinda like a modern au at the same time, purely because I’m thinking of the dumb shit that cats do in this day and age… but like,, the Jedi order still out there doin’ Jedi things…

For now it’s just the Jedi but I may also make a post containing information about Palpatine’s cats. If I do any more posts for this au I’ll just use the tag ‘jedi cats au’

Anyway, the details are under the cut, enjoy! 

Obi Wan Kenobi  - himb human  -  he’s very tired from looking after these troublesome cats while being a Jedi - “I’m sorry Master Windu I must rush home and attend to some important business” *rushes home and finds Anakin staring out the window into the back garden meowing angrily at Dooku* “*sigh* Anakin...” - if the mission isn’t going to be that dangerous but requires him to be gone for a while, then he’ll bring the cats with him - “Master Kenobi, do you really have to bring all them with you?”  *with Anakin clawing his way up Obi Wan’s leg and Qui Gon prowling across his shoulders* “yes, Master Windu”  - constantly has to stop his cats from fighting with his neighbour’s cats (especially after Qui Gon got a nasty clawing from Maul one time): Dooku, Grievous and Maul, even though Obi Wan isn’t particularly fond of those cats himself - said neighbour is a seemingly friendly old man called Palpatine, who all of Obi Wan’s cats seem to like, especially Anakin - he’s so tired,, blease let himb rest - will often fall asleep on the sofa by accident, and then will wake up to find Qui Gon in his lap and Anakin on his face, while Padme and Ahsoka are on the sofa and pressed up against his legs - “Anakin nO” - often looks to both Qui Gon and Padme to help with the other two - have I told you how tired this man is? 

Anakin Skywalker  - he a black cat, v slim and slender, has a slight bit of extra fur around his face, yellow eyes - you may only pet him when he wants to be petted, if you try and pet him when he does not wish to be touched you sHaLL fAcE tHe CLaWs oF dEaTH fOuL hUMaN - touch the tumby and YOU WILL DIE - try and touch the toe beans and YOU WILL DIE - very rarely purrs, except for when in the presence of Obi Wan, the only human who can pet him almost 24/7 - will always obey Qui Gon, will listen to Obi Wan most of the time, proteccs Padme and Ahsoka constantly  - quite playful, give him a droid toy and/or a lightsaber toy and he enters the Silly Zone - is the kind of cat that will stare at you straight in the eyes as he quickly pushes something breakable off the table - is very territorial and hates it when there are any other cats in the back garden, especially the neighbour’s cats  - although he actually likes the neighbour human Palpatine quite a lot, although Palpatine is not privileged enough for extra Anakin pets like Obi Wan is - a very loud cat, meows constantly and loudly, as well as hissing at those he doesn’t like and doing that fuckin ‘mmmmrrrrrrrooowwwwwowooww’ aggression noise  - is also a very active cat, is constantly running around the house and often goes for walks in the neighbourhood, mostly to get into scraps with other cats (this is how he got a scar over his right eye) - “Mrow!” “Anakin no it’s not time for food yet” “mrrrOW!” *sigh* “Anakin what did I say about arguing back?” “mrrOOWW!” “Anakin!”  - when he’s not running around being a nuisance, he’s cuddling up with Padme - often takes Ahsoka out with him on his adventures - when Obi Wan takes them on missions with him, Anakin is somehow more mischievous and disobedient than he normally is - will absolutely bring Obi Wan ‘presents’, all the time - a sharp and pointy boi who is also a fuckin dumbass

Qui Gon Jinn  - one of those cats with the super long fur, mega soft fur, soft green eyes, clearly used to be a brown tabby cat but has turned more grey with his age, a slender cat but himb big because he tol - old and wise cat that always has this knowing look in his eyes - do not be fooled by his calm appearance, he will fuck u up if he wants to - you may touch the tumby, but only if you are Obi Wan, otherwise you will die - try and touch the toe beans and you will die, unless you are Obi Wan, then you’re allowed to - will break shit and mess shit up when nobody's looking, then act like he didn’t do anything when they discover the mess… this mess is often blamed on Ahsoka or Anakin  - having said that, he is also the kind of cat that will slowly push something off of the table while remaining eye contact the whole time; he doesn’t do this with Obi Wan though, Obi Wan must not see his crimes - when is brought on missions with Obi Wan, will also be more mischievous than normal, but Obi Wan never knows this - “Master Kenobi! One of your cats broke something again!” “Oh no, really? I bet it was Anakin, hey Anakin!” “Is Anakin this grey-brown fluffy one?” “No? That’s Qui Gon, he would never break anything” “well he just did” “what?” - all of the other cats respect him greatly, even Palpatine’s cats  - he must protecc his human at all costs, as well as the other cats, Obi Wan can’t help but feel slightly flattered at the fact that one of his cats is so willing to protect him - he may be a cat but Himb Still Dad - a calm and relaxed cat, likes to lounge in the sun, and will make that little ‘mrrrp?’ noise whenever he is awoken - not really that playful, will just sit and watch the human do silly shit in an attempt to try and play with him - most of the time he is relatively quiet, gently purrs when he is petted - himb soft and smart

Padme Amidala  - a pretty, white cat with piercing blue eyes, she very elegant - will allow most people to pet her, unless she knows that they’re Not Nice and will therefore take a swipe at them (this is the same for the tummby and the toe beans)  - Obi Wan and Anakin want her to stay inside as like,, an indoor cat, but she wiLL nOt bE cOnFiNEd - most of the time the noises she makes are relatively soft and quiet, unless she’s fuckin angry then she’s loud and constantly making noise - you can tell when her and Anakin are having a spat because there’s a constant stream of very loud angry cat noises that drown out some slightly fearful loud cat noises - overall is a very well behaved cat, respects Obi Wan and doesn’t break anything - when encountering Palpatine’s cats, she doesn’t make any noise, she just glares at them (which is somehow more scary and intimidating than Anakin’s constant stream of aggressive noises) - she probably won’t, but everyone knows that she has the power to kill them at any moment - is the best behaved out of all of the cats  - her fur is somehow constantly clean and perfectly groomed, Obi Wan doesn’t groom her more often than the other cats and whenever her and Anakin go out together, Anakin always comes back dirty with his fur in a mess but Padme will still be pristine - if Obi Wan takes her on a mission with him (which he doesn’t really want to do but sometimes he has no other choice) she is on her best behaviour, she’ll snoop around if she has the chance to but she won’t actually cause any trouble, unlike Anakin and Qui Gon - only plays when she’s in the mood, doesn’t go quite as crazy as Anakin does, but she can get quite into playtime - she soft and elegant but has the potential to be sharp and pointy

Ahsoka Tano  - the smallest of the cats, a bright ginger tabby cat with a white tummy and white paws, bright green eyes - she’s also the youngest of the cats, still has a vague kitten look about her - highly energetic and literally will not stop moving, constantly goes outside, often with Anakin - will let most people pet her, but only if she’s in the mood to be petted - do not underestimate this tiny kit, she may be inexperienced but she can and will fuck you up… although on occasion she does have to be rescued by Anakin or Qui Gon - Ahsoka: gets into a fight with Palpatine’s cats and takes on more than she can handle Qui Gon: feels his dad cat sense tingling and goes to rescue her, must protecc the smol at all costs - is the same as Anakin when it comes to territory, and will do the same shit as him if she sees any unwelcome cats in the back garden, except she’ll also claw at the window - very impatient with everything *insert let me in meme here* - she breaks shit, but most of the time it is actually accidental, she very rarely causes destruction on purpose - if taken on one of Obi Wan’s missions she’ll try her best to be behaved but she just can’t help but get into trouble - has a lot of respect for Obi Wan and the other cats, but much like Anakin she can’t help but not follow the rules sometimes - fuckin’ LOVES to be played with, she’s down for that shit anytime and will often enter the Silly Zone - has a loud and high pitched meow, will make noises frequently, so much so that Obi Wan sometimes just has to put his face in his hands and focus on drowning her constant meowing out - she must ZOOM at 3am most nights and will not stop until she has no more energy left - a very sharp and pointy smol that is not to be underestimated

[judas-had-a-crown]

Tag thingy

I was tagged by @lynolch for this (thank you dear <3)

1. Nicknames: None.

2. Zodiac Sign: Scorpio

3. Height: 5′1 (I’m smol and angry and it’s annoying)

4. Hogwarts House: Ravenclaw *-*

5. Last Thing I googled: Quotes about tower

6. Favourite Musicians: Too many to count actually. But what comes up immediately is Marina, Lana del Rey, Queen, Imagine dragons, Panic! at the Disco and Poets of the Fallen. <3

7. Song Stuck in My Head: More like song(s) since I listen to a lot of stuff XD For now it’s To be human by Marina, Love of my life by Queen, Wolf Totem by The HU and Black Honey by Thrice.

8. Following Now: 370 but most don’t seem active anymore :/

9. Followers: 664 (we get there... you know where XD)

10. Do I Get Asks?: Nah. I don’t post as much as I used to, so.

11. Amount of Sleep?: What I would need: 12+ hours. What often happens: 5 to 6 hours.

12. Lucky Number: 12

13. What I’m Wearing: Shirt and short pants, both with a Snoopy print. Yes. I’m a trendsetter.

14. Dream Job: Travelling the world and documenting its remaining wonders and secrets with as less human contact as possible. 

15. Dream Trip: Around the world.

16. Favourite Food: A specific food from a Greek restaurant I know. More regularly, however, it’s probably pasta bake.^^

17. Instruments: The only instrument I play is the controller of my PS4/3, and instead of Beethoven’s symphonies the soundtrack of Persona 5 blares through my earphones oh so sweetly. 

18. Languages: German, English, various Meow sounds and sarcasm.

19. Favourite Song: Too many. -_-’’ Three of my all-time favourites however, are probaby Buy the Stars by Marina, Senbonzakura (English cover) by Lizz Robinett and Teardrop by Massive Attack.

20. Random Fact: I‘m worth more than I think I am.

21. Aesthetic: I honestly don’t know what my aesthetic is. It might vary often, but since there exists one of my favorite songs in coexistence with one of my favorite movies (a blessing, really), I think this video captures the core of it quite well.

Tag 21 people: I don’t know 21 people X’D I’ll just say everyone who wants to do it may feel tagged. ;) as well as @sabotage-prowl , @horrible-device and @holymultiplefandomsbatman if you’re up for it.^^

[imababblekat]

Imagine The Autobots Reaction to Wall of Death

~

Optimus:

you left for some huge concert and in the middle of it you get a call from him

Optimus was worried because he hadn't heard from you the whole day

the booming speakers made it incredibly hard to hear you

all the poor bot could make out was you shouting death and then screaming

he quickly picked up your location and rushed over

what he saw terrified him!

you, in the front of one side of a crowd, rushing head on into another crowd

he was frozen to the spot just looking on horrified, before you had been laid a nasty punch to the face

Optimus had never ended anything so quickly(it wasn't exactly hard to though when you're a giant robot from space)

after finding a place of privacy, away from booing angry fans, Optimus starts going off about how crazy and dumb that was of you and how worried he was, etc

"Wall of death"

"what?!"

"it's called wall of death!"

Optimus just stares at you as you explain a Wall of Death with an ice pack on your face and a goofy smile

he tells you not to do it again(though he has a sneaking suspicion you will), and just kinda holds you close for the rest of the day

Ratchet:

it's you who accidentally calls him by process of butt dialing

he was working on something when his audio sensors were blasted by deep rumbles and sharp static as the com tried to bring everything through

he's about to snap at you when he hears your shrill scream and what he can only guess to be the shouts of others

after tracking your location he shows up dreading to see the destruction of Decepticons and you badly injured

but no; instead he gets you running headfirst into a forceful wall of other humans twice your size

before either side can clash with each other, Ratchet blast his sirens and ruins the whole concert

fans can complain and shout at him all they want; but what the hell were you think (y,n)?!

he just starts ranting/scolding you as you sit in his cervo pouting; completely embarrassed as people and especially the band start to associate you with the grumpy bot  

"it's called wall of death, Ratchet!"

"and you thought it be smart to jump right into it?!"

"it's not the first time I've done it; gosh."

"what is it with you humans and finding joy in violence?!-"

the whole ride back to base is the two of you going at it; you sarcastically calling him mom and him only getting snippier

you start leaving your phone on airplane mode whenever you go to concerts now

Bulkhead:

you're so smol; specially to him

not only that, but you have an air of innocence to you

so when he heard you talking about WOD to a friend over the phone followed by cute giggles; he thinks nothing of it

he dropped you off at the concert, and was to be your ride home that day too

he forgot what time to pick you up exactly, and decided to go earlier then what he suspected to be your pick up schedule

he's shocked when he shows up to see two large crowds of humans clashing into one another

he almost wonders if he's forgot the place too, till he spots your recognizable (bow/cap), and then becomes completely startled; especially  when he sees you land a vigorous punch to someone much bigger then yourself

at first everyone thinks the loud booms are the base picking up, and almost get more heated when they soon realize that, uh no, that's not the band guys, that's a giant robot

it's not hard for him to break up the crowd; everyone actually just freaking out because he actually looks really intimidating while mad

after plucking you from the many people he starts going on about how upset he is at seeing you so violent; you're always so sweet! What happened (y,n)?! You're never like this!!

"I'm sorry Bulkhead! I thought you knew!"

"Knew what?!"

"WOD, remember? Wall Of Death!"

Bulkhead's face heats up slightly in embarrassment; he thought it stood for something like, well, uh, something not so violent that's for sure! Don't giggle (y,n)! He's trying to be serious!

at the end of the day, Bulky's just really concerned about you getting hurt is all; every one of his friends are dear to him, especially you 

Bumblebee:

Bee over hears you mention something about a wall while conversing with Sari

seeing the excited expressions on both your face makes him question whats up to which you mention a super rad concert happening that night

Sari's upset because she's too young to go, so Bee ask if he can go in her place and you simply shrug a why not

your calm demeanor throws fools Bee all the way up till the concert; he has no idea what he's getting into

when the music starts playing he gets a bit rattled

I mean, he likes it, but he's never listened to something this hardcore!

the poor bot is still feeling a bit unsettled, but then the lead singer starts shouting for the crowd to break apart while using some very profound language; probably a good thing Sari didn't come!

Bee's just standing off to the side confused and quickly alarmed that he can't find you

when the music hits it's high, its then he notices you at the very front of half the crowd and charging on like in those gladiator movies he's watched

he freaks out so bad and quickly rushes in to grab you before speeding off in his alt mode

"What the heck Bee?! It was just starting to get good!!"

"Starting to get good?! (Y,n) are you crazy?! I've done some pretty wild things but that?!"

"It's called a Wall of Death, dude."

oh, so that's what you were excitedly discussing about earlier that day

now he knows why the Professor won't let Sari go to concerts with you...

Prowl:

Prowls out patrolling late at night on the outskirts of the city; for some fresh air and to look out for any badies

as he's driving down one of the more rural roads, he see's some lights off in the distance and the low sound of booms

naturally he's curious so he goes to check it out and is a bit shocked to see a whole lot of roudy teens and young adults going crazy for a rock band playing on a make shift stage

there's even a couple bonfires, which he's pretty sure is illegal

actually he's pretty sure everything happening here is illegal

he's stuck thinking about how to approach this; whether or not to let Detroits actual authorities take care of it, or to handle it himself when he takes quick notice of the drums tempo picking up

its then that he gets a glimpes of a familiar face as the field starts to part down the middle and he realizes that it's you

Prowl doesn't have time to ponder on why the heck you're here or how you even know about all this, because suddenly everyone's charging at each other like wild animals, with you smack dab in the middle of your sides lead

he quickly throws on the sirens, and he has to admit, it was pretty funny seeing all the wild kids freak out and quickly scramble like bugs from under a rock

he catches you trying to book it but quickly catches you and locks you in cuffs

you're freaking out so hard till you hear him speak

"I'm not sure whether to be surprised in seeing you here or not..."

"Prowl?!"

he gives you that signature grin of his before taking off the cuffs and telling you to get on his alt mode

Prowl never ask you about what it is you were about to do back there. In stead he'll research it on his own, but when he does learn that the dangerous act you were about to participate in is called a Wall of Death, and after seeing the after maths of it, you can be sure to have a ninja/police man always watching your back.

oh yeah, also you're friends won't stop teasing you about getting arrested but not having any charges *wink,wink*

guys stop looking at them like that; it's what you think!

~xXx~

[verdigrisprowl]

Jan 28 Bevel’s Movie Stream - Leverage & Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Prowl was delighted to see a few episodes of his favorite human cop comedy show. He still identifies deeply with Holt—even more deeply, in fact, now that he’s technically the same rank.

Today ItsyBitsySpyers 8:29 pm *Soundwave does NOT skid in toward his couch this time. He still flies in through the buildings while Prowl's not watching, but this time, he comes to a hover-stop at the edge of the floor and neatly transforms. Then he walks to his seat.* Bevel 8:31 pm *claps, impressive control of form is impressive* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:31 pm *Bobs his helm and sits down. Thank you.* Tarantulas 8:32 pm *has insufficient flier knowledge to be impressed* Bevel 8:32 pm *the lack of outermost walls is kind of becoming an aesthetic now* FakeProwl 8:33 pm *You're lucky Prowl missed that again.* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:33 pm *It's good to have a habit of arriving early~* Bevel 8:33 pm *the real reason the mun didn't approve your entry and not anything to do with being distracted* FakeProwl 8:35 pm *He doesn't want to show up early, if he shows up early he's got to sit here with Bevel and not the person he showed up to sit with.* *... Also he can't show up until somebody with a holomatter projector is here.* Tarantulas 8:35 pm *soon you'll have one of your own, prowl* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:35 pm *Soundwave's had one in his backpack for some months, you know.* FakeProwl 8:36 pm *Soon. ... As soon as he finishes making it.* *Which may be a leading reason why he always seems to show up after Soundwave.* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:36 pm

Tarantulas 8:37 pm *nevermind all that mess - has prowl arrived? if yes, a spider's landing on his shoulder to pretend as if he came in with prowl* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:37 pm *Hello, spider. A feeler wave.* Bevel 8:37 pm No Starfleet stuff tonight. Ratchet is not here and it is getting really extreme so I want to take a break. And I found some stuff about cops for after the Leverage people. FakeProwl 8:37 pm ((gdi cro)) Bevel 8:37 pm *subtly trying to appease to Prowl's interests* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:38 pm (( <3 )) FakeProwl 8:42 pm ((ok ive gotta snag some sandwich stuff before we start brb)) Bevel 8:42 pm ((mkay FakeProwl 8:49 pm ((ready!!)) Bevel 8:50 pm ((We'll start after this song if everyone else is ready to go. Tarantulas 8:51 pm (( i am! ItsyBitsySpyers 8:55 pm *Soundwave settles into the couch and curls his fingers. Art theft and bribed judges.* FakeProwl 8:56 pm *BRIBED JUDGES. despicable.* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:58 pm [[...How many paintings of card-playing dogs ARE there?]] Bevel 8:58 pm Maybe humans really like the theme? FakeProwl 8:58 pm (("secret nazis" she says. oh, for a time when the only nazis were secret.)) Tarantulas 8:58 pm *spider churr* I think there's a series of them. FakeProwl 9:01 pm Humans are inordinately fond of anthropomorphizing dogs. Bevel 9:01 pm Oh no she died. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:01 pm [[And making them sing.]]

[[Ah. Waste of good talent.]] Tarantulas 9:02 pm Pfft. She's not dead. Bevel 9:02 pm Really? FakeProwl 9:03 pm ... Remarkably intact corpse for a chunk of meat that took an explosion that size. They could at least try harder to fake it. Closed-casket funeral. Tarantulas 9:03 pm To be fair, she did run AWAY from the bomb, maybe her back is more damaged. Bevel 9:03 pm Oh. *now that it's been pointed out it makes sense* Tarantulas 9:03 pm *snickers* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:03 pm *Waits for Prowl to say It.* FakeProwl 9:03 pm Trap door. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:04 pm *Soft huffing. He adores that.* Bevel 9:04 pm Ha. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:05 pm [[He wants to see more of the hacker's work.]] FakeProwl 9:06 pm Indeed. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:10 pm [][][]Sometimes, I can still hear his voice.[][][] FakeProwl 9:10 pm Whose? Bevel 9:10 pm *giggles* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:11 pm [[It is a reference joke. He once saw an Earth film where one being claimed another was dead. The 'dead' one told her to stop and that was what she said next.]] *Scoots forward and steeples his fingers* Tarantulas 9:12 pm *giggling* FakeProwl 9:12 pm Ah. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:14 pm *Soundwave is trembling.* FakeProwl 9:15 pm ((... is that fucking wil wheaton)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:15 pm ((it is)) Bevel 9:15 pm ((yes ItsyBitsySpyers 9:16 pm [[How much more poorly can this go?]] Bevel 9:16 pm Boo! I wanted to see them fight for real. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:17 pm [[...How is that not an insulting nickname.]] Bevel 9:18 pm Maybe they mean fighting him is no-win? ItsyBitsySpyers 9:18 pm [[Hmm. Perhaps.]] FakeProwl 9:19 pm ... What's a c-- a... a coding-mashing... whatever. Coding-mashing marrow. Bevel 9:20 pm Kobayashi Maru. A captain's test in the Starfleet universe. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:22 pm [[Test of character, primarily.]] FakeProwl 9:22 pm Hmm. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:23 pm *Loud puffing.* [[He has had days like this. Mostly because of Jazz.]] *Pause.* [[He caused a few as well, of course.]] Tarantulas 9:24 pm I'd have LOVED to be a spider on the wall for that, hyeh. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:26 pm [[It is a shame those events can't be turned into a memoi--]] *DELIGHTED by this turn of events.* FakeProwl 9:26 pm The conceit that two teams have the exact same team makeup with the exact same members with the exact same skills is... hm. Unconvincing. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:28 pm [[Perhaps. But it is good entertainment.]] FakeProwl 9:30 pm Mm. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:30 pm [[For those of us who have spent much of their lives doing questionable things, at least.]] ItsyBitsySpyers 9:32 pm *Pleased they got the painting back.* Bevel 9:33 pm Ha. FakeProwl 9:34 pm *Gives Soundwave a look. Who do you think was commanding the people doing questionable things on the other side.* I still find it too contrived to be entertaining. Tarantulas 9:35 pm *is now a little wistful/annoyed that he doesn't have a nemesis or match* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:35 pm *He was giving you an out, Prowl.* Bevel 9:35 pm ((this was actually how they temporarily had the actress leave the show for maternity leave, it's why she's sitting and in so much heavy clothing most of the episode FakeProwl 9:36 pm *PERKS UP* Brooklyn Nine-Nine? Bevel 9:36 pm Yeah! You know about it? ItsyBitsySpyers 9:36 pm [[What is Brooklyn Nine Nine?]] FakeProwl 9:37 pm Police comedy. It's excellently entertaining. Bevel 9:37 pm *yay the gamble paid off* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:37 pm [[...You don't find police comedies offending?]] Tarantulas 9:37 pm (( a-algernon FakeProwl 9:38 pm Not usually. I'm content with the inaccuracies. Especially when they portray the police in a positive light. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:38 pm *Taps his fingers. Well, all right. If Prowl doesn't hate this, he will try to find humor in it.* FakeProwl 9:38 pm Captain Holt is the best. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:38 pm *...Already found it.* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:41 pm [[...He is not making predictions like those for the CSF.]] FakeProwl 9:41 pm Not that kind of psychic? ItsyBitsySpyers 9:41 pm [[Not even if he was.]] FakeProwl 9:43 pm ((when this episode is over remind me i've gotta put my leftovers away.)) Bevel 9:44 pm ((mkay ItsyBitsySpyers 9:44 pm *Sudden point at the screen.* [[Smokescreen.]] Tarantulas 9:44 pm *snickering* FakeProwl 9:47 pm *... leans on Soundwave.* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:47 pm *Tell him he's wrong. Tell him that's not who that cop is.*

*??? Leans back. Wiggles a little to get comfortable.* FakeProwl 9:48 pm *Thought Soundwave was referring to the tagger.* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:48 pm *No, that's Bevel.* Bevel 9:48 pm *hey now* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:48 pm [[Arrest him anyway.]] FakeProwl 9:49 pm Of course. Bevel 9:49 pm *wants to be Rosa, is definitely not Rosa* Tarantulas 9:50 pm *crawls down off prowl's shoulder and sizes up. he's kinda bored by this show actually and can't use a datapad (easily) when he's in smol alt mode* FakeProwl 9:50 pm *... where does he crawl down to. because if it's in Prowl's lap, he's catching him.* Tarantulas 9:51 pm *nah, just to the back of the couch and off it* Bevel 9:51 pm *sudden Tara* Hey, Tarantulus! Tarantulas 9:52 pm Hyah, hello there. *is used to being seen so often that he's surprised bevel didn't* Bevel 9:53 pm Rude. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:54 pm [[Fire him.]] FakeProwl 9:54 pm *quiet sigh.* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:54 pm [[Who gets to do that. Who do they go to for that.]] FakeProwl 9:54 pm Someone above HIS pay grade. Bevel 9:54 pm Is there someone higher than the commissioner? ItsyBitsySpyers 9:54 pm *Soundwave manages a nod to Tarantulas even though he's kind of angry right now.* FakeProwl 9:55 pm Didn't they call him deputy commissioner? Bevel 9:55 pm I think so, yeah. FakeProwl 9:55 pm The commissioner that he's deputy to. Bevel 9:57 pm Aw yay, he backed him up. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:57 pm [[Who is higher than them, if they don't wish to act?]] Tarantulas 9:59 pm *settles in wherever he can with his datapad* FakeProwl 9:59 pm Beyond that they'd have to turn to New York's civilian authority or an outside law enforcement branch. And outside of that, I don't know, that's the limit of my knowledge of the higher echelons of the NYPD. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:00 pm *He wanted to see something happen to the deputy commissioner. It's good that his son was taken in but - hmph. Where's the investigation into all this threatening and demanding pardons.*

*The feeler stretches across to gently pat Tarantulas. He's paying more attention now.* Bevel 10:03 pm Giggle pig. FakeProwl 10:03 pm Street name. It was covered in an earlier episode. Bevel 10:03 pm That is a really silly street name. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:04 pm [[...The humans have a road called Giggle Pig?]] Tarantulas 10:04 pm *tarantulas is the one who's not paying attention now, heh. he'll allow the touch but he's absentminded and busy* FakeProwl 10:04 pm It's the street name—as in the commonly-recognized name—of a drug. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:05 pm [[Ahh. He sees.]] FakeProwl 10:05 pm Wunch was also the one who manipulated them into making a task force based on inadequate evidence. Bevel 10:06 pm So she is a bad cop? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:06 pm *...Suddenly intrigued.* FakeProwl 10:06 pm I don't know what her... *sorry, he has to stop to try not to laugh at the silent disco scenes* Tarantulas 10:08 pm *mumbles* Definitely should have been a poet. Bevel 10:08 pm Yeah. FakeProwl 10:08 pm *You tell them, Holt.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:09 pm *Makes a note to try to figure that out for an interesting shake-up one night.*

*...Not one word from any of you.* Bevel 10:10 pm Welp. FakeProwl 10:10 pm I don't know what her behavior is like when she's not pettily trying to undermine Holt. But I'd imagine that her politicking undermines her ability to be an effective or good cop anywhere else. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:11 pm [[Her politicking undermines several humans' ability to be an effective or good cop.]] Bevel 10:11 pm ...he is a really good detective. FakeProwl 10:11 pm Not that she gets to call herself a "good cop" based purely on her behavior... yes. That thing. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:12 pm *Looks to Prowl.* [[How much math.]] Bevel 10:14 pm Car insurance? FakeProwl 10:16 pm Oh, absolutely massive amounts. Attempting do the math of a drug dealer would take nearly two percent of my processing capabilities. *he's made that up on the spot.* *he's hoping the "massive amounts" = "2%" is appealing.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:17 pm *Stare. Is that a joke or does Prowl actually consider that massive?* FakeProwl 10:18 pm *............... humor ping.* Bevel 10:18 pm *not sure what is impressive but nods anyway to Prowl's assessment on the math* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:18 pm *He's both confused and vaguely turned on.* [[Car insurance is, er -]] *Oh. Oh, good.* [[What humans do because they are not natural drivers.]] Bevel 10:19 pm What does it do? FakeProwl 10:20 pm ((okay brb gotta return leftovers)) Tarantulas 10:20 pm (( also gonna brb Bevel 10:21 pm ((then i shall wait to start the next episode ItsyBitsySpyers 10:21 pm *Soundwave contemplates the humor ping, decides it's probably true anyway based on what he's seen so far, and leans a little harder. Slight turn so it's more his back than his shoulder. That's more personal. Implications!* [[It means that someone else pays them money when they destroy a perfectly serviceable vehicle.]] Bevel 10:23 pm Humans are weird. FakeProwl 10:25 pm ((ready!)) Tarantulas 10:26 pm Agreed. *hums and looks up from datapad* Is there another episode planned? I'm not sure I can stick around. Bevel 10:26 pm I thought one more since they are so short. Tarantulas 10:28 pm *says his goodbyes and mentions the cephaloparty isn't quite ready yet but should be soon, then he's out* Bevel 10:28 pm *waves goodbye* FakeProwl 10:28 pm *nods goodbye to tarantulas.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:30 pm *Bobs his helm. And blips quietly. Cephalopods. Good. Goooood.* FakeProwl 10:30 pm ... I looked it up, by the way. The joke is that the company Blockbuster is bankrupt and therefore the stock is worthless. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:31 pm [[...Doesn't the word "blockbuster" usually indicate that something was a smashing success.]] Bevel 10:31 pm Bad name. FakeProwl 10:31 pm Now it's blockbusted. Bevel 10:32 pm *giggles* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:32 pm *Plays back a tiny fanfare. He liked that one.* FakeProwl 10:36 pm *... leans harder against Soundwave's back.* FakeProwl 10:38 pm *Prowl recognizes nothing overly weird about that flirt sequence.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:38 pm *Is mildly concerned that she was mostly stapling the picture of the dog, but otherwise doesn't know what they're doing that's strange either.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:39 pm *...Except for the running away.* Bevel 10:40 pm *gets the running away because that's what she'd do if someone flirted with her* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:42 pm [[...How close to your experiences in the force is any of this?]] [[Or dealing with other officers.]] FakeProwl 10:43 pm It's only a slight exaggeration. ... I've seen more Wuntches than Holts. Bevel 10:45 pm That sucks. There should be more Holts. FakeProwl 10:49 pm I agree. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:50 pm *Soundwave look at Bevel, looks as far over his shoulder as he can at Prowl, back to Bevel, and basically Will Smiths him as best as possible with one hand.* FakeProwl 10:50 pm ... What. I've been in charge a matter of weeks. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:51 pm [[You're attempting to be one. He hopes.]] FakeProwl 10:51 pm ... *affirmative mumbles.* Bevel 10:51 pm *looks at Prowl, looks at Soundwave, looks at Prowl* You are a cop again? FakeProwl 10:52 pm ... Captain of the Cybertronian Security Force. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:52 pm *Uses the hand to gently pat Prowl's knee guard and settles back in. Take the compliment.* Bevel 10:53 pm Congratulations! *the whole of Cybertron, that sounds awesomely impressive* FakeProwl 10:53 pm *mumble* thanks. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:53 pm *Wh-- is Bevel playing the--?* Bevel 10:54 pm *it's thematically appropriate?* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:54 pm *Tries his damnedest not to tremble.* Bevel 10:56 pm *hesitates* Oh, um, I wanted to tell you. I quit working for Blurr. FakeProwl 10:57 pm Found someone willing to pay you more for the same crimes? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:58 pm *Oh, ow.* FakeProwl 10:58 pm ((can we skip the school pedophilia song?)) Bevel 10:58 pm ((We can FakeProwl 10:58 pm ((thanks)) Bevel 10:58 pm ((no problem FakeProwl 10:59 pm *Prowl's not offering approval until he knows this is indeed a positive change.* Bevel 11:00 pm *flinches, ok, she deserved that* No! I do not have a job anymore. You were right. I thought I was helping but I called some of the universes I worked in and we made a lot of things worse. FakeProwl 11:01 pm Hm. ... Thought so. I take it you're planning to not be so indiscriminate with your employers in the future. ((i sang roxanne at a summer camp karaoke thing once)) Bevel 11:02 pm Way more. ((that's awesome FakeProwl 11:02 pm ((except i squeaked and accidentally started the song an octave higher than i meant to sing it and went "welp i guess im stuck on this octave for the whole song")) Bevel 11:03 pm ((oh no FakeProwl 11:03 pm Good. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:03 pm ((puff that's damn precious)) Bevel 11:03 pm ((it is Bevel 11:05 pm I applied for a volunteer position on my Cybertron. FakeProwl 11:05 pm Volunteering for what? Bevel 11:07 pm Um, the police. I was gonna help at the hospital but I do not know much about medicine and my mom is in charge of the hospital and June said that was nepolianism. *she totally mangled that* FakeProwl 11:08 pm Nepotism. Bevel 11:08 pm Yeah! ItsyBitsySpyers 11:09 pm *Tilts his helm.* [[Undercover work is volunteer now?]] Bevel 11:10 pm Prowl--our Prowl--said it would be mostly clerical stuff. FakeProwl 11:10 pm So you're a civilian employee. ... Civilian volunteer. Bevel 11:10 pm I guess. Bevel 11:16 pm But I do not know what to do and it seemed like a good way to help without actually not helping. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:19 pm *Soundwave glances back to Prowl and pings.* @P: [[Does never having fought you mean he is weaker than the singer or that you are the superior law force?]] FakeProwl 11:21 pm @S «The singer fought the law and lost. As long as you've never fought me, we don't know which of us would win.» @S «Regardless, I think that the typical consequence of most alliances is that both parties are stronger cooperating than either one of them would have been had they fought.» ItsyBitsySpyers 11:22 pm [[It is better than what you were doing before.]] *...Is 500 miles far for a human? Hmm. They do walk so slowly.*

@P: [[So you were listening that day.]]

*Gestures back to Bevel. Progress, no?* Bevel 11:23 pm ((is this on the soundtrack for some 80s movie i've never heard of or did they do some weird ot3 music video story? FakeProwl 11:26 pm @S «I do try to.» FakeProwl 11:27 pm Hm. Depends on the police department. *He'll be cautiously optimistic of one where his own alternate is involved.* Bevel 11:28 pm ((and now my theme song FakeProwl 11:29 pm ((lol)) ItsyBitsySpyers 11:29 pm *Nudge nudge. Small pinching motion. Steal her. You know you want someone with her talents on your force. ... Also he doesn't want her imitating his deployers and being sent to watch him by his own Prowl.* Bevel 11:30 pm *let's be real, my Prowl would do that* FakeProwl 11:34 pm *small 'ugh' face. on one side of the scale she has one unusual talent that's useful for undercover work. On the other side of the scale she's got a weak moral compass, no knowledge of policing, a highly criminal history, an inability to reflect on her own life or try to improve herself, no critical thinking skills, black and white thinking, and either astounding obliviousness to the realities of the world around her or an extreme capacity for self-delusion.* *off the top of Prowl's head.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:35 pm *Ah, well. It was only a desperate attempt to keep her from finding out all the dirty little secrets about what his minis have been up to.* *Clerks do handle the paperwork.* Bevel 11:36 pm *she's going to wind up spending time with Chase so maybe he'll be a good influence* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:38 pm *...Is that a dancing dead bird on the screen. What. Maybe he's been up too long and he's seeing data ghosts.* Bevel 11:38 pm *humans make strange music videos* Bevel 11:43 pm I think that is all I can show tonight. My first shift starts soon. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:44 pm *Soundwave nods and stretches.* [[First impressions are important. We should not keep you from making a good one.]] Bevel 11:47 pm *nods* Yeah. I will have more Starfleet next time. FakeProwl 11:47 pm *... light concealed touch to the small of soundwave's back before he scoots away and straightens up.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:49 pm *Affection ping, since he's too late to do more than that. He then stands and nods to Bevel.*

[[Good. He cannot wait to see what will happen.]] FakeProwl 11:49 pm *He can wait.* Bevel 11:51 pm *nods back* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:52 pm *He's probably going to wish he had.*

[[Goodnight, both of you. He will see you tomorrow.]]

*Steps to the edge of the floor, transforms... and remembers that Prowl is there. Casually does a vertical take off, like you do. Fly himself overhead like a law-abiding citizen and certainly not anyone who had a bit of fun on the way in.* FakeProwl 11:52 pm *GOOD.* FakeProwl 11:54 pm *A vague farewell nod in Bevel's direction, and Prowl disappears too.* Bevel 11:54 pm *well that wasn't awkward or anything* *she'll start cleaning up and hope she doesn't completely mess everything up*

[transformersimagines]

Are u doing matchups? I'm a 5'1 smol chub girl with red (dyed) hair and green eyes. I'm an quiet person and and usually independent and reserved. But with friends i make tons of shitty references and memes and when i get excited talk way to fast to understand. I am usually a stay inside person, if if I'm invited to go somewhere 1 on 1(maybe 2, depends really) i'll go. I enjoy drawing, writing and science and when i do something, i won't stop until i see it through. Thank you(MTMTE, TFA, or TFP)

I match you with….. Jetfire & Jetstorm (TFA)

(You can choose either, or both)

They are the most adorable Autobots you have every meet and they love you with all their spark. This undying love and dedication comes with a price though, the price being frequent cuddles and random trips anywhere on Earth. They actually didn’t realize they even had a crush on you in the beginning. They just felt a weird sensation in their spark when they first saw you smile and were curious. One thing lead to another and you guys are together. They adore when you ramble, talking about something you’re passionate about. Not only is your voice music to their audio receptors, but they love seeing you happy and yourself. You will never have to worry about anything ever again, they will always have your back, even if it conflicts with Sentinel Prime’s orders (the earth Autobot team cover the twins, so you don’t have to work about them getting into huge trouble over you).

“Thanks for coming with me to get the game (Y/n). Bee was a little busy.” Sari thanks, admiring the case of said game before shoving it back into the shopping bag. You smile down at her.

“No problem Sari, everyone at base was a bit occupied.” You remember, “What’s even going on anyway?”

“Oh! I totally forgot to tell you. Sentinel and his royal guard are coming by today, something to do with the Decepticons.” Sari explains.

“So just Sentinel Prime and Jazz?” You question.

“No, there are two more bots you haven’t meet yet, Jetfire and Jetstorm. They’re twins, I think, and have this thick accent. They are cool bots, no worries.” Sari rambles. You nod, maybe you could just go home after you drop of Sari. You did not want to deal with Sentinel today. It would have to be in and out fast before any of the guys saw you, Optimus and the others really worried the Decepticons might try to -

Your thoughts are cut off as the building next to you falling apart and Lugnut emerging from the dust cloud and rumble. You grab Sari and pull her behind a nearby car.

“I would call the bots before Lugbutt over there spots us.” You suggest, Sari was already on her phone dialing away. You peek out from behind the car and see Lugnut looking around, eyeing every human that was running around screaming. His eye locks with yours and one of his hands swing up to his head (probably to activate a com link, just like how the Autobot’s work).

“I have eyes on one of the targets.” He states. You quickly duck back behind the car.

“Sari, whats the ETA on the team?” You ask nervously.  You could hear Lugnut yell at someone over his com (about his one eye and some comment about that triple changer), but his voice was getting closer and closer.

“I have found them both Lord Megatron.” Another voice calls from above you and Sari. You both look up and see Starscream hovering overhead. Just then someone finally answers Sari’s  phone.

“Sari, where are yo-” Bee starts. You and Sari dart in different directions as Starscream reaches towards you two.

“Downtown! They’re after us!” You here Sari scream into her phone before she sprints into a nearby alley.

“You go after that one Lugnut, I’ll get the bratt.” Starscream orders, turning to follow Sari.  Lugnut looms over you, eye glowing menacingly. You instantly turn on your heels and run in the opposite direction. The ground shakes under you as Lugnut takes chase. The shaking ground causes you to stumble about, running into poles and bumping into parked cars as you flee.

“You won’t get away from me!” Lugnut yells. You were starting to believe him. No matter how fast you ran he only seemed to get closer and closer. It definitely didn’t help your case when you made a quick turn down a side street (to try and juke Lugnut and lose him) and became tangled in your own feet, causing you to fall and slide across the pavement. Lugnut doesn’t turn as fast as you and continues down the street, trying to stop. You groan and turn over so you’re sitting on your butt, your arms sting and pulse from the fall. You hiss and examine them, but quickly remember you have a much, much bigger problem than simple cuts or bruises. Lugnut had recovered from his pass-by and was now towering over you.

“Got you.” He sneers, reaching out. Before you could react a loud cheer fills the air just seconds before Lugnut is rammed by something, pushing him back down the street, away from you.

“(Y/n)!” You hear Optimus call. You stand up as he, Sentinel, and Jazz pull up next to you. They all transform, Optimus looks down at you concerned, “Are you ok?”

“I’ll survive, what about Sari?” You ask, the sound of a nearby explosion causes you to flinch away. A pillar of smoke rises from the distance.

“Prowl and the otha’ boys on your team ar gettin’ her.” Jazz states. You nod, knowing those guys could take care of Screamer easily. You start to brush off the dust from your clothes as Sentinel approaches Optimus.

“Guess you were right Optimus, for once, the Decepticons actually did go after your humans. Just another weakness making you unable to handle a team.” Sentinel retorts, you roll your eyes at the comment. Before Optimus had a chance to say anything a jet goes zooming past the group above the city.

“There goes Screamer, guess the others were able to take him.” Optimus notes, choosing to ignore Sentinels comment.

“I’ll go help Jetfire and Jetstorm with Lugnut.” Jazz says, running past the bots. No sooner did Jazz disappear around the street did Prowl, Bee, and Bulkhead round the adjacent corner, Sari sitting in Bees front seat.

“The game survived!” Bee and Sari cheer as the bots transform.

“Everything’s taken care of Optimus, though there was plenty of damage.” Prowl reports.

“Ya! Starscream turned tail and ran when he saw how outnumbered he was.” Bulkhead laughed.

“The big Decepticon is gone!” A new voice cheers. The guys move to the side as Jazz and two other bots walk towards the group. They must be Jetfire and Jetstorm, but you had no idea which was which.

“That was a close one!” Sari comments.

“Yes, way too close, we’ll need to…” Optimus trails off. You look at Optimus confused and follow his gaze to find the two new bots… staring down at you. You shuffle uncomfortably under their gaze, looking away, but offering a small wave.

“Hi?” You say nervously, what if these new bots were not as cool as Sari said they were…

“Who are you?” The blue one asks.

“Oh, you guys haven’t met yet. Jetfire, Jetstorm that’s (Y/N) another one of our human friends.” Bulkhead explains.

“(Y/n)?” They both mumble. You look between the other bots confused.

“Well.. I guess I owe you two a thank you for saving me.” You state, smiling up at them.

“What am I? Spare parts?” Jazz jokes, you laugh softly, trying to hide it behind your hand.

“Thank you to Jazz.” You add.

“Well, now that everyone knows everyone, can we leave this disgusting city!” Sentinel complains.

“We can head back to base.” Optimus says, turning to address the earth team, “Once there we’ll need to figure out some kind of guard situation with (Y/n) and Sari so we can avoid another situation like today.”

“Bee and Bulkhead can be my guards, right?” Sari questions.

“Ya! We’re already around each other 24/7.” Bee adds. You nod in agreement, the three of them were practically inseparable.

“Guess we’ll have to figure out mine when we-” You start, being cut off by the twins.

“We volunteer!” They say simultaneously. What follows is a lot of laughing from Jazz, an angry Sentinel. And some very, very confused looks from the earth Autobot crew. They give you a questioning look. You just shrug, just as confused as the rest of them.

[letsdiscussrobots-blog]

IDW prowl, mtmte drift, swerve, and whirl Cybertronian s/o being shrunk to the size of a human child

Unfortunately, I don’t know enough about IDW Prowl to write him. Please make sure to read the rules before sending in a request, friend

Drift would snicker and tease you a bit, but he’d take you to see Perceptor to figure out what was going on. He carries you the whole way, claiming that he doesn’t want you to get stepped on. He really just likes to hold tiny you. So smol, so cute! 

Swerve is just. So tickled. Not only is he not the shortest anymore, but look at you! You are so adorbs! This is just like that one movie, when the scientist guy shrunk his kids- right. Not helping. He’s kind of at a loss for what to do, so he takes you to the medbay. He’s gonna make a few jokes at your expense, but he’s not mean about it.

Whirl relentlessly teases you. He picks you up and laughs when tiny you gets angry and starts to throw a fit. Looks like you’ve got a short temper. Whirl, stop. At first he lets you walk on your own so you have to scramble to keep up. Then someone almost steps on you and Whirl punches their lights out and places you on his Danger Tiddy™, where you ride around the rest of the day. It takes a while before you actually get to Brainstorm’s lab to figure out what’s going on because Whirl has “important things to do.” He just wants to show off his itty bitty s/o.