#snow on the beach: flashback.

[augiebrown]

snow on the beach: flashback.

Os pais de Augie haviam liberado seu toque de recolher naquela noite, como vinham fazendo na última semana em que ela vinha passando tempo com James Hawk. Ela entendeu que eles haviam gostado de James, um garoto educado e bonito. Augustine não havia achado nem um pouco ruim, considerando que isso significava ter mais tempo ao lado dele. E ela vinha gostando muito de estar ao lado dele. Começava a sentir medo de que sua paixãozinha poderia não ser retribuída, sim, mas preferia sua amizade do que nada. Estava sentada ao lado dele em um tronco, próximos à fogueira, enquanto vários outros adolescentes riam e brincavam por ali. Augustine viu um casal aos beijos no tronco ao lado e se sentiu grata por ter o fogo como desculpa pelas bochechas vermelhas. "Fifteen thousand dollars." Ela disse de repente, dando continuidade na brincadeira de mais cedo na qual discutiam por quanto dinheiro entrariam nus no mar, com toda aquela gente por perto. "É minha oferta final." Brincou, como se tivesse aquele dinheiro.

[idv-ask-optometrist]

Sand. Thoughts? Opinions?

"What? Sand?" Rue stands perplexed as to why you'd ask about something so random.

"I've never actually seen it before. Well only in books and posters about beaches or deserts plastered in building walls. Never once in my life have I went to beaches or even deserts.

So I don't have much of an opinion about it. But I do imagine that it feels like a grain of rice when stepped on... How about you? Do you like sand?"

[mylovelies-docx]

Sorry, I Love You - Part 5

Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood afternoon, everyone.

:) Have fun

Plot: You and Bucky have a good thing going - best of friends that also have more than a little chemistry between the sheets. Everything is fine until you develop feelings for the man who doesn't want a relationship. What will happen when Bucky finds out?

C/W: Awkwardness, flashbacks, feels

Word Count: 1,950

Tag List: NOW CLOSED! If you'd like to keep up with this story, please follow my blog and turn on notifications! ❤️ you :)

[Prologue][Part 1][Part 2][Part 3][Part 4]

This wouldn't be your and Bucky's first undercover mission together, but it would be the first one where the tension between you is decidedly not sexual. You're not even sure how well the two of you can pull off this charade since you have no idea what your chemistry is like anymore. Used to, you could do anything together, be anything together.

Not so much now.

There’s an awkwardness between you. Silences pregnant with all the things left unsaid – or should have been left unsaid. You’ll catch Bucky watching you from the corner of your eyes, always with an unreadable expression like he’s trying to figure you out again without actually asking any questions.

You can't imagine that you've changed so much in the intervening months, but Bucky makes so much progress in therapy that his confidence in himself and his personality grow by leaps and bounds all the time. 

You don’t know this new Bucky, but you wish you did. You wish you had been with him to see his growth, encourage him on. 

You’ve missed out on so much of your life by staying away from the Tower. You’d had so many plans that never came to be – no walks in the park when the flowers started to bloom, no trips to the beach on the hottest days of the year, no ice skating when the first snow fell. You kept a tab on everything that should have been on the calendar in your mind, noting all the days that had significance in the past but went uncelebrated this year.

But what’s done is done, and you have to pay for your actions – half a year away is a small price to have Bucky back in your life, even as a stranger instead of your lover. 

You’re now trying to organize your new life on the outskirts of a small town in Russia, just a few miles away from a HYDRA base. Snow was falling thick and fast as the quinjet touched down hours ago, leaving behind a pristine blanket of white outside your new home. The small, two-bedroom cottage looks rustic, but it is still nicer than most of the surrounding homes due to Tony’s influence. There is hidden technology that will help the house to stay warm in this cold climate and random high-tech appliances, lights, and other things that look normal and are anything but.

With the HYDRA base going radio silent, you may be in this little home for longer than was initially expected earlier this year. Bucky is sure that the base is still active, though.  He spent a lot of time here as the Winter Soldier, but no one has received reports from the embedded spy in recent months. This inactivity is concerning since you're no longer sure what is going on inside the building anymore.  

It would be too obvious for Bucky to go undercover inside the facility, so that leaves it up to you to infiltrate as a researcher. The spy had assured last year that no one from the facility lived in the town you’ve settled in, so it’s safe enough for Bucky to remain close by as you work.

But the small town you’ve settled in is so traditional that the only way to remain inconspicuous as a younger woman is to be connected to a man in some way – be it living with family members or a husband.

And since you don't want to be labeled an outcast or worse, Bucky is here.

Bucky is going to be a mechanic at the small family-owned shop just down the road, and his prosthesis is covered in Stark technology that makes it appear as if he’d never lost it. Bucky used to spend a lot of time fixing up old cars and motorcycles between missions, so he should really enjoy spending his days in the garage helping out the Kowalds.

Unfortunately, your background isn’t as fun. You’re a whiz when it comes to biology, so Nat cooked up a false resume full of lab work that centers around eugenics and biomanipulation – things your spy had reported the facility was actively looking into. In order to get your foot in the door at the HYDRA facility, the Avengers had to create a background so disturbing that you're not even sure if you can interview for it properly.

 You're just zipping up into your thick winter coat when Bucky walks out of the kitchen drying his hands on a dish towel.

“You headin’ out now, doll?” He asks, a small worry line between his eyebrows.

“Yup,” you answer back with a comforting smile on your face. “I need to go meet with our contact to make sure that everything is still okay.”

“Just be careful, yeah?” he tells you, slinging the towel up onto his shoulder. Today is his first day at the mechanic shop, so he's dressed in blue overalls with a small name tag stitched onto his chest. The sun is just barely rising, but he's going to be late if he doesn't hurry.

"You know me, Buck. My middle name is Safe."

"Your middle name is Trouble and you can't convince me otherwise, babygirl."

You stick your tongue out at him and blow a raspberry, holding your middle finger up in the air as you turn around and head out the door. Once out of his sight, you smile and bask in the feeling of having your friend back.

You'd missed the banter and easy wit you used to share together, so this small exchange feels like a return to normal. The awkwardness might return in time, but you hope Bucky has forgiven you enough to power through.

You trek along the deserted streets. The early hour and layer of snow on the ground seems to be keeping the townsfolk within their homes, wrapped snugly under their warm blankets. You sigh heavily and watch your breath fog in the air, the mist condensing and freezing your skin as you walk through the cloud.

You pass house after house, noticing lights turning on and the sound of hairdryers, televisions, and conversations humming in the air. Everything has a vague, indistinct quality to it, lulling you into daydreams of what their lives are like. Is it simple? Do they enjoy this cold, snowy location? Or are they also dreaming of a warm day laying in the grass in nothing but a pair of shorts and a tank top?

A memory worms its way to the surface of your mind of a day spent just like that with Bucky. 

This was only a few weeks before your friends-with-benefits situation started. It was the hottest day of the year so far, the humidity heavy in the air and making the sidewalks and parks of New York City intensely uncomfortable. Even though Stark has the Tower equipped with the latest technology, he's incapable of leaving anything well enough alone. He'd been tinkering with the HVAC and somehow short-circuited the entire system. Everyone in the Tower was miserable and cranky, choosing to avoid one another in an attempt to stave off arguments and confrontations. 

You'd been sitting in the shade of the balcony, fanning yourself as you watched all the teeny tiny people on the ground maneuver the crosswalks and traffic to get to where they were going. It was no warmer outside than it was in your room, so you chose to people-watch instead of lay there and sweat miserably on your clean sheets.

Just as some bratty kid you’d been watching chucked the ice cream he’d been yelling for only moments ago onto the sidewalk, the sliding glass doors behind you whooshed open. The sound of metal knocking against the doorframe had let you know that Bucky was the one to interrupt your spying.

Regretfully turning your neck, you felt your skin sliding wet and hot against itself. A frown marred your features as you stared at Bucky as he stood behind you, his eyes alight with mischievous glee.

“What did you do…?” You question slowly, almost afraid to know what that look was all about.

He shrugged a shoulder and smirked. “Nothing too bad.”

“BARNES!!!” a voice roared from the depths of the Tower.

You quirked an eyebrow at him and a small, disbelieving smile graced your lips. “That doesn’t sound like nothing, Buck.”

Bucky hmm’d and glanced back into the building when a CRASH reverberated from where the voice had yelled moments ago. “I was going to get out of here for a while. You wanna come?” he questioned breezily.

“And why would I want to leave when Tony’s working on fixing the AC?” you replied as you continued to fan yourself. Bucky’s eyebrows had quirked ever so slightly.

“Y/L/N!!!” 

Your hand had frozen mid-fan and your eyes widened so much that Bucky couldn’t help but laugh.

“Where’d you say we were going?” you asked as you rose quickly from your seat and bypassed Bucky at the door.

***

“You little shit!” You had laughed uproariously when Bucky finally admitted to the prank.

“What else was I gonna do?” he responded, turning his face to look at you.

Even with the intense heat that day, you and Bucky had decided to forgo the climate controlled vehicles in the garage and went instead with the fastest getaway vehicle – Bucky’s bike. The wind had whipped against your body when you held onto Bucky and watched the city fall into the distance behind you. 

He apparently hadn’t had a destination in mind, so you had ridden until cities and towns disappeared. He’d pulled off beside a barely visible hiking trail and jumped off his bike. You had followed suit and watched as Bucky pulled a blanket from inside the storage compartment on the bike. You hiked your eyebrows questioningly, but only got a grin in response. 

That’s how you had found yourself lounging on a blanket in the middle of a field with Bucky on the hottest day of the year. You’d chatted and laughed for hours until the sun had slowly faded from the sky. Out that far, the light pollution of the cities couldn’t touch the stars. You had gazed upwards, trying to draw the constellations as you remembered them.

You weren’t any good at astrology or astronomy, but the stories behind the figures in the sky captivated you nonetheless.

You laughed again and turned to face him as well. “And why’d you have to implicate me, huh?” 

“Figured it’d be more fun that way,” he had answered slyly. 

You had wound your arm up and smacked him on the stomach, your hand bouncing off of the toned muscles. He’d caught your wrist on the next swing and held it up and away from his body. You’d tried to tug it away, but his metal fingers held fast and didn’t let you go. You rolled over toward him and began trying to use your body as leverage, but you had only succeeded in pulling yourself closer to him.

You huffed and blew the piece of hair that had fallen over your eyes away and looked up at him. He’d had a look in his eyes that he hadn’t directed at you before, but you’d seen glimpses of it when he’d find someone to bring back for the night.

You can’t help but think that that moment had been the turning point in your friendship with Bucky, the moment he thought about asking you to be friends-with-benefits. Of course you’d found him handsome long before then, but that was a moment that really cemented your attraction to him. 

You didn’t have romantic feelings at the time, but you should have known they were inevitable.

Part 6

@jackiehollanderr @rabbitrabbit12321 @12345sebby @blackwood-bodecker-housewife @lauraashley93 @themorningsunshine @happinessinthebeing @nash-dara @calwitch@stany0url0calwh0res111 @pono-pura-vida @learisa @introverbatim @kentokaze @marvelogic @kaz11283

[kithtaehyung]

back to december (teaser) (m) | ksj

title: back to december (teaser) pairing: brother's best friend!seokjin x reader(f) rating/genre: m (18+) ; angst , fluff , smut ; brother’s best friend au, wedding au, second chance au summary: ever since you left town to pursue your dreams, life has fast forwarded into one big blur. so when you hit pause to attend your brother’s wedding exactly three years later, your brain instinctively resets and rewinds. because you have to spend it with the very person that had been there at the start. the one person you regret leaving behind. note: this originally started as a one-shot for @raplinesmoon for the maui relief fundraiser, but turned into something more. since it also fit into the mold of this holiday collab, here we are! note 2: this is part of the jingle all the way collaboration with @kpopfanfictrash, @leahsfavefics, @cybrsan, @yoonia, and @sugaurora! all the holiday collab fics have the phrase “the holidays aren’t so bad with you around.” warnings: [explicit warnings to be posted on drop day!] language, alcohol, angst lol, time switches/flashbacks, seokjin being the sweetest until he’s not >:)), reader being damn cool, overthinking, bbf!jin needs his own warning i am warning y’all now, horribly great jokes, winter themes, relationship failures, stress/anxiety, jin being jin, did i say angst?, falling into cold water, a lot of gd yearning mood: back to december - taylor swift, halley's comet - billie eilish, universe/snowing in la - thuy teaser word count: 1.2k | est. word count: uhhh 20k+ lol wanna be on the taglist? add yourself here! est. drop date: january 2024

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It all started with an accident in winter. 

Ever the gracious hosts, your family decided to throw a cookout for your brother’s birthday, inviting everyone in the neighborhood and its outskirts to join in celebration. While your brother was initially opposed to being outside in the frost, word got around that his crush of three years running would be present, which suddenly warmed him right up to the whole idea.

Typical.

You were also initially opposed—having to sit through the festivities while your older sibling hogged all the attention—until you discovered your own downfall was attending, too. 

Because of course he would.

And if he was coming, you were set on making your naive self presentable and noticeable, and you still consider the day of the party to be the best you’ve ever carried yourself. You were confident, you were radiant.

Until you got bumped into the backyard pool.

You don’t even recall who knocked you in. All you remember was water rushing into your vision, and paddling through outright shame and embarrassment when you shakily swam your freezing bones to the ledge. Everyone saw you: your friends, your family, your brother’s older circle and acquaintances. In your adolescence, it was the literal worst thing to have happened to anyone in the history of ever.

But someone’s outstretched hand greeted you when you got to the pool’s edge. 

And when you looked up, you questioned if you hit the bottom on the way in because the face you were seeing was a shock. Were you deceased? Did you somehow swim to heaven’s beach?

No. It was really him, the very person you got all dressed up for. 

Seokjin. Handsome, reserved, off-limits friend of your brother Seokjin. 

Years later, you still question why he was the one helping you out. But it didn’t matter at the time because all you wanted was to get thawed out as soon as possible. 

“Come on,” he had urged. “You’ll get sick.”

Trembling because of the cold and nothing else, you took his hand and let him haul you into the house, wondering what the hell was going on the entire time. Why was he the one helping you? Where the hell was your brother? 

Because not only did he lead you inside, but the boy also accompanied you to your bathroom, grabbing a towel off its rack and wrapping it around your knocking shoulder blades. 

“Grab some clothes, okay?” 

“Huh?” 

“Go get clothes,” Seokjin ordered, moving towards your shower. “And change out of those as soon as you can.” 

“Oh.” Blinking, you couldn’t decide if your shivers were from the fall or his comments. But either way, you were shaking horrendously. “Yeah, okay.” 

After that, you remember being so cold you couldn’t even move your legs. Which meant that Seokjin had to lead you to your room and wait at the entrance while you hastily grabbed whatever you could find. 

There was no way he was gonna catch the cutesy patterns of your underwear. No way. 

When you were done, Seokjin brought you back into the restroom, the spray of water echoing through the festively decorated space. “It should be warm enough now,” he urged. “Don’t wait.” 

“Thank you,” you finally huffed, hating how your shakes stifled your gratitude. “You can, uhm. Go back out there now.” 

“Mm.” In the doorway, his eyes reflected the bright lights so perfectly. To this day, you still remember the way you compared them to stars. “Well. Umm. Good luck.” 

And you will never forget the way you felt heat before you even touched the run of the shower. 

“Yes, it’s all set. We are still on for Monday.” 

“Good. This is the meeting we absolutely cannot miss.” 

“Umm, yes—I mean—Understood.” 

“Is everything okay over there?” 

Rushing to close the door of your rental, you bite back a curse as your suit jacket catches in the edge. Because of course it does after the frantic day you’ve already had. “Yes! Everything’s”—you smush your top against your side while shutting the door again—“Fine! But I do have to go.” 

“Sure, sure. Oh, one more thing—”

Right. Rummaging through your purse, you locate the keys at the very bottom while trying to ingest the four things being tossed into your ear, locking the car in a fast walk to the massive mountainside property ahead of you. 

“ —then we’ll finalize the merger. Got that?” 

Holy shit, your brother must be doing even better than you or his fiance is loaded. 

“Hello?” 

“Oh, shit, sorry. Yes, Mr. Hamada, we can do that.” 

“Mm. What did we say about language.” 

“Apologies.” Damn your filthy mouth for running even faster in cold weather. Because it is the goddamn arctic out here. “I will say I have been getting better, though.” 

“Improvement won’t matter if you fuck up during the meeting.” 

“Alright, buddy.” Your superior’s laugh grates your ear as you haul ass into the warm estate, worry suddenly gripping you when you realize that no one is walking around. 

Shit, are you that late? Did you miss everything? 

Skittering right to the main doors, you start to panic. Are these the main doors? They look like them. Fancy. Very fancy. Shit, shit, shit, is the wedding over—

A full body bumps into your side as you round a table bursting with flowers. Having a sound enough mind to cover your receiver, you react in a shout, “Hey, watch it—” 

“Sorry!” 

Wait. You know that voice. 

Even though it’s one that you haven’t heard in years. 

“…Jin?” 

Everything slowly stops as the man turns and, if you weren’t so in shock, you would’ve noticed the way his eyes traveled from your heels to your perfectly trimmed brows. 

You expect both something and nothing. Because when it comes to the person standing in front of you, there’s no telling what he’ll destroy you with next. 

But what comes out is merely a tiny, chest-constricting, 

“Hello.” 

You stare, and stare, and stare some more. Even your boss cannot bring you back to the present with his incessant poking. 

Because Jin looks so fucking handsome in his suit that’s not quite dressed yet, with hair that’s swept just enough to throw you off planet earth. Even the way his tie lounges around his neck gives you pause, because it showcases how broad his shoulders have become. 

How can he look the same and yet so heartbreakingly different?

“I—” 

“Later, tuna fish.” 

Your heart lurches. 

“They’re waiting for me.” 

To your dismay, Seokjin presses a soft hand on your shoulder while passing through the ornate entrance, his lingering burn searing through as you watch him button his suit on the run. 

Well. At least you didn’t miss the wedding. 

You hear your sibling’s hearty shout echo throughout the hall, but you have to physically tear yourself from your spot to finally answer your boss. 

And to not fixate on the one person you thought you were safe from today. 

But of course he’s here. Why wouldn’t he be? Him and your brother have been inseparable since the beginning, and you should’ve known even being on different planets wouldn’t keep them apart too long. 

Speaking of… 

Traveling to another galaxy might solve the numbing ache in your chest. Maybe you should consider that gigantic leap yourself. 

Because seeing Jin again brings you back to December. 

And the frost you feel in your bones overshadows any weather brewing outside. 

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tbc.

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wheee! we have a teaser! | join the taglist!

a/n: isi i hope you know what monster you're about to unleash lmao. here's to another holiday seokjin! gosh, he will keep haunting me and i love him for it. second chance with isi's initial brother's best friend!jin request? gotta love it. the one-two-three punch, i reckon. anyways, hope y'all enjoyed the teaser and i am so so nervous about the main drop but hope you like that, as well :'))

links: jingle all the way collab ; masterlist

[jexnkookie]

The Law of Attraction: A Ski Trip and a Proposal (Interlude)

Interlude Summary: The night that Park Jimin proposed to Y/N. Part of 'The Law of Attraction' series.

Interlude Rating: M (18+) [Language, sex, mentions of depression, alcoholism]

Interlude Genre: Fluff, Smut

Characters/Pairings: Heir! Park Jimin x Reader

Interlude Word Count: 1.8k

Authors Note: I wanted to add this to the story, just a bonus scene of how Jimin proposed to Y/N. I may add more of these 'interludes' throughout the story. The next full chapter will be out tomorrow. x

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Series Masterlist

*Flashback*

Jimin hadn’t felt so genuinely happy in his life. 

The snow was coming down silently, in large flakes, piling into beautiful pillows of white just outside of the floor-to-ceilings in the living room of the large luxury cabin. Your families were together for the week, enjoying a ski trip. As the clock ticked towards 1 a.m. after a long day on the slopes, everyone had retreated to their rooms for the night, except for you and him. The two of you laid together on the beige sectional sofa, sprawled out underneath a blanket, so that you were curled up comfortably between his legs, with your head resting on his chest. The room was dimly lit, with only the warm fire burning bright, alongside the soft glow of the television playing a movie you had found to turn on. Jimin’s hand absentmindedly caressed you, occasionally sneaking under your sweater to rub circles directly onto the skin on your lower back. 

“Did you have a good day?” You asked him softly, careful not to wake your families up. 

“I did.” He responded, leaning down to place a kiss to the top of your head. “Did you, my love?” 

“Mhm.” You hummed. “It was really fun… I’m glad we planned this.” 

“Me too, honey.” Jimin smiled to himself knowingly, glad you couldn’t see the secret gleam in his eye. “I’m happy we’re here.” 

Jimin thought about the box, hidden in a small compartment in his luggage, carrying a striking Cartier engagement ring. Jimin always knew, on some level, that he wanted to ask you to marry him. Ever since the night he snuck you away from the charity event his father made him attend, listening to your sweet giggles under the beach moon light as he kissed you. It had taken his breath away, tasting your lips for the first time. His father scolded him so much that night, thinking he had snuck away to down a bottle or two. But after holding you, he wasn’t present enough to hear the anger. He just thought of you. 

Who knew that the girl he once played with back when the two of you were children, would grow up to be the woman he would care about so deeply? Jimin never believed in fate, per se, but that one kiss led to romance that felt so right, like it was always meant to happen. 

“I love you, honey..” He whispered, letting his lips linger on your hair. 

“I love you, too.” You whispered back, lifting your head up to meet his gaze. 

He learned down to press a soft kiss to your lips. As he deepened the kiss, his hands wandered down, under the blanket. He let his fingers run along the waistband of your soft pajama shorts, before sliding them in. You giggled into the kiss, amazed how your boyfriend’s touch was still able to make your blush. 

“Shhh, we can’t wake them up.”  Jimin smiled mischievously. His fingers found the lace of your panties and slid in, quickly finding just the right spot to gently circle with his thumb. “Honey, how are you already so wet?” 

“Jimin…” You whispered, your lips parted as you felt him between your thighs. 

“Hm?” He hummed. “We have to stay quiet, my love. Can you stay quiet for me?” 

You nodded, and rested your head back down on his chest, spreading your legs to grant him better access. The blanket covered his hands, one buried between your thighs, and the other under your sweater, touching your breasts.  

“So fucking beautiful.” He whispered in your ear. “My perfect girl, with such a wet and pretty pussy.”  

“W-want you.” You said, trying so hard to be quiet. “Please, Jimin.” 

“Ok, honey. Let’s get you to the bed, can’t take you here.”    

You laughed softly when Jimin quickly handled you so that you were wrapped around him, feeling his hard length pressed against you as he carried you to the bedroom, locking the door behind him. He wasted no time taking off your clothes as well as his own, and climbing on top of you under the warm covers of the bed. You had your hands in his hair and your legs thrown around him as he kissed your lips and neck, and fucked into you deep and slow, taking his time. He wanted to please you properly, and quietly moaned at how your body tightened around his achingly hard cock in return.  

When you both finished, Jimin held you close and let you drift asleep in his arms. You woke up snuggled in close, naked and spent as a reminder of the night before. You laid together for a few long moments in the morning, the morning sun making you look exceptionally gorgeous to him. It was that slow, winter morning under the sheets that he knew that the time was right; today, he would ask for your father’s blessing. 

That night, after dinner, Jimin saw his opportunity to speak to your father in the kitchen privately, while you were with the rest of your family and his stayed in the dining room, playing a board game at the table. While leaning against the kitchen counter and nervously playing with the sleeves of his sweater, Jimin told your father that he loves you, and promised him that he would always take care of you. Jimin’s father spent his life teaching his son how to negotiate business deals, but this was something else. Asking your father to approve of him, had him anxious in a way that no contract in the world could.  

“Anything she wants..” Jimin said, nervously playing with his sleeves. “I’ll do anything for her. I just want to make her happy. I love your daughter, sir.” 

“I don’t doubt any that.” Your father responded with a chuckle. “But can I ask you a more personal question, before I give you an answer?” 

“Anything.” Jimin said, his eyes wide. 

“You’ve always been a good kid. I remember you when you were little, coming over with your mother and playing with Y/N. But your father has told me about the trouble you’ve gotten into your last couple years of university.”

Jimin’s heart sank. He never once considered that your father might actually tell him no. 

“Have you been drinking recently? Partying?” 

“No, sir.” Jimin said, trying to keep his voice steady.  

“What about your friends? Do you still hang around that Kim Taehyung kid? Your father said he was a bad influence for you.”  

“No, sir. He graduated, and he didn’t stick around Busan after that.” Jimin explained. “Probably for the best, sir. For me, I mean.” 

“I think you’re right about that.” Your father said with a nod. “So, no drinking, no partying. You’ve been keeping your nose clean. That’s good. Have you gotten your degree?” 

“Yes, sir. International business and economics, and a minor in English. Honors, as well.” 

“That’s good to hear.” Your father smiled approvingly. “It seems like you’re ready to take over the business, with your father’s retirement coming up, and it seems like you’re cleaning your act up well.” 

“Yes, sir. I think…” Jimin paused, choosing his words carefully. “I think that being in love, and wanting to build a life with someone, will do that.” 

“Alright, I see you’re redirecting this back to her.” Your father chuckled. “Like I said, you’ve always been a good kid. We’ve all made mistakes, but you’re doing well, and Y/N is completely crazy for you. But I don’t have you tell you that, do I?” 

Jimin smiled and let out a laugh of his own, shaking his head ‘no.’ You loved him, just like he loved you. He knew it, as did your father, and everyone else. 

“As long as you can keep yourself out of trouble, and she’s happy, then I’m happy.” Your father said, extending his hand for Jimin to shake. 

“T-Thank you sir.” Jimin smiled bigger than he’s ever smiled before. “I’ll be so good to her, I… I want to do it tonight.” 

“Whenever you think it’s right.” Your father said. “You already had a ring and everything, huh? You must’ve known this was the trip.” 

“I didn’t know, but I had a good feeling.” Jimin responded, reaching into his pocket to pull out the ring box. 

“Well, what are you doing standing here and still talking to me?” Your father laughed, motioning towards the dining room where you sat. “Go get her.” 

A few hours later, when everyone was gathered in the living room, Jimin got everyone’s attention before holding your hand and bringing you in front of the fireplace, in front of your families. He got down on his knee, causing yourself and a few of your relatives to gasp in surprise. Your father and mother teared up, both of your aunts and uncles smiled sweetly, and Jimin’s father wore a proud expression on his face at the man his son was becoming. 

“Honey… I love you.”  Jimin started, looking up at you with a smile, seeing the way your eyes teared up. You covered your open mouth with your manicured hand, completely in a state of blissful surprise. “I love you more than I’ll ever be able to fully express, but I want to spend the rest of my life trying.. We’ve known each other since we were just kids, spending our summers playing in our parents’ backyards, and now, I see my future with you, spending my life making you laugh, and making you happy. I adore you, Y/N. You’re beautiful, kind, and the happiest part of my life. I want to spend the rest of my life loving you, if you’ll have me. Honey, will you marry me?” 

“…Y-Yes!” You cried, your hands shaking. “Oh my God, Jimin, yes! Of course.” 

Jimin immediately sprung up with a large smile, and pulled you in for a kiss, and held you close as you cried. 

“I promise, honey, I’ll be so good to you.” He whispered in your ear as he hugged you, only for you to hear. “I promise you, those things from my past, they’re gone. They'll never happen again. You make me want to be better, for us.” 

He pulled away and took your hand, sliding the ring onto your finger. It was striking; large and shining. Your mother and aunt walked over to see the ring, gushing over how beautiful it is, and how sweet Jimin was for his speech. Jimin walked over to his father, who put a strong hand on his shoulder, and looked at his son with pleased eyes. 

“You picked well. She’s a good one.” He said. “Good girl, good family. Don’t fuck it up.” 

“I won’t. I promise.” Jimin said, as sure of himself as he’s ever been. He knew he still had personal issues left to fight, but for you, he wanted to be better. 

[jeankluv]

Snow on the beach || Trafalgar Law x fem!reader

Words: 3.5k

Warnings: angst, blood, deathly disease (amber lead), law’s past, doffy (again)

Notes: the warning are all for the flashback, the flashback is in iliac form. Enjoy this new chapter and Merry Christmas to everyone who celebrates it, if you don’t please have a nice evening and take care of yourself ❤️

Previous chapter || Materialist || Next chapter

Chapter X: 7 days for the trip

The snow fell for days after Law left. You had been happy to see snow for the first time but you had also been extremely sad for not being able to share those moments with Law. It had been over two weeks since Law had left and you hadn't heard from him, Corazon had told you that he was fine and very busy, that's why he hadn't called. You had given him Nami's house phone to give it to Law so you could talk, but during that time the phone never rang.

Now you were in the living room coach reading while having music in the background. Nami had gone out a few minutes ago to run some errands and you had decided to take advantage of that time to read the book she had lent you. You couldn't stop thinking about how lucky you had been to have met the people you had met. You had arrived in that town almost two months ago and everyone had welcomed you with open arms. You wish you could talk to your 16-year-old self and tell her that everything would be okay, that you would find that group of people who would make you feel cared for and loved.

You began to turn the pages, as the minutes passed. Half an hour had passed when a knock on the apartment door brought you out of your reading.

You put the book aside and got up from the couch. You walked to the door and opened it to see Robin, smiling at you.

“Robin!” You smiled widely.

Despite having been with her for a short time, how little you had known her and what others had told you about her, you felt that you could be yourself with her.

“Hello y/n!” She hugged you. “How have you been?”

“Good, please come in.” You stepped aside and let her in. “I thought you weren’t coming until two days.”

“I was able to leave earlier, I had some early classes so there was no problem.” She gave you a sweet smile.

“Oh.” You nodded, she was so elegant and also intelligent.

“Tell me, how is it to live with Nami?”

“It’s really fun.” You said walking towards the kitchen. “I can’t compare her with anyone, this is my first time living with someone else but I’m really having so much.”

“I’m happy to hear that.” She said while grabbing the cup you gave her. “Thank you. Are you excited for the trip?”

“Yep.” You said making a noise in the p. “It would be fun.”

“Is Law coming?” Your heart stopped pumping for a second. Was he? You didn’t think he would, you wished but the chances were really small, hell, he might not even come for Christmas.

“I… I don’t know.” You let out with a sigh.

“You haven’t been able to talk with him?” You shook your head. “Mhm… and Corazon he…?”

“He doesn’t know anything, although I’m eating with him today, so I will try to get some info.”

“That’s good. I hope he comes.” She smiles. “Your whole face lights up when you talk about him.”

“That’s not…” You tried to explain yourself.

“Y/n even Luffy has noticed it.” She winked at you and walked to the living room, leaving you with a red face in the kitchen.

You sighed, you needed to control yourself from turning red or else everyone would notice how into Law you were. You hung out with Robin until it was time for you to meet Corazon for lunch. You said goodbye to Robin and took the bus towards his house and to which for a time where yours was too.

The trip was shorter than you remember and you realized you were already getting out of the bus. You smiled when you saw. Corazon outside of his house playing with Bepo, when he saw you he waved and you did the same. Bepo started running towards you, moving his tail and happily licking your palm.

“Hello Bepo.” You smiled, petting him. “Good boy.” You praised him.”

You walked with him to where Corazon was and he gave you a hug.

“I’m so glad you came. I missed you so much.” He said while still hugging.

“I missed you too. It’s weird not being here.” You sadly smile. “But living with Nami is nice.”

“That’s good…” He looked at you. “Sadly now I need to deal with Mrs.Smith’s grandson.” He sighed.

“The grandson?” You tilted your head.

“Yeah, he came here and is staying for I don’t know how long. But he is…” He sighed again. “Complicated.

“Oh… I thought Mrs. Smith didn’t have a family.”

“She has.”

“So…” You started to think, this was the reason why Mrs. Smith told you to leave?

“Yeah?”

“Mhm?” You came back to reality. “Oh nothing, don’t worry.” You smiled. “Why don’t we go inside and start preparing everything to eat?”

“Yes.” He grabbed your shoulders.

You followed Corazon right to the kitchen, you smiled when you saw that it was a mess. Law was right when he mentioned that he was a disaster in the kitchen and honestly you were no better. You just hoped you didn’t burn the house down during the day. With Corazon, you prepared a simple plate of pasta, fortunately no one was harmed and nothing was burned.

You sat in front of him and finally let out the question you were dying to ask since you stepped out of that bus earlier.

“Do you know anything about Law?” You said poking a macaroni off your plate.

He shook his head. “He hasn’t called, I’m sure he is busy. Don’t worry.”

You bite your inner cheek, you knew Corazon didn’t know the truth and you had the need to tell him. He was his son, he needed to know, but you also thought it wasn’t your place to tell him. But Law could be in danger and he could do something, right?

“Y/n stop thinking so much.” He spoke. “He will be okay.”

“But he…” You stopped talking and looked down to your palms, what could you do?

“I know…” He let out and you looked at him back. “I know the truth and I know he will be alright.”

“You know?” He nodded.

“Yeah, I found out days after Law left.” He sighed. “Found some notes and old bills, I called him after that and he told me everything. He assured me everything was okay and that there was nothing to worry about.” He touched his forehead. “But honestly it makes me so sad that he has been enduring all this on his own. He was just a kid when everything in his life went down and I thought that us moving here was going to give him the peace and calm he deserved.” You saw how he started to get teary. “But I was wrong and my poor boy was still suffering.”

You tried to find the right words but your heart was aching for the thought of Law.

“Did Law tell you I am not his real dad?” You opened your eyes.

“Wait… I thought.”

Corazon shook his head and smiled “I meant Law when he was 10. At the time I was working undercover on my brother's organization.”

Corazon entered the room in silence, his brother was in front and the rest of the family members, like Doflamingo liked to call them were sat around a large table. Corazon walked a few steps when he fell to the ground. He slipped with something or maybe he was just being clumsy as usual. He heard the laughter of the kids, Baby5 and Buffalo.

It was then when he noticed the presence of another kid. He was skinny, really pale and with big big dark circles under his eyes. The kid rolled his eyes when he saw him.

Corazon stood up and sat next to his brother, listening to him talk about how they were going to pass the drugs to a new contact they had in the south. But he couldn’t concentrate, his thoughts were on that kid, why did he end up here? Kids shouldn’t be part of this world.

He learned that the name was Law, Trafalgar Law and was 10 years old.

The days started to pass and he noticed the white spots on the boys body, he quickly figured out what it was. Amber Lead diseas, he heard about it but thought everyone that had it was already dead. His heart attached with the thought of that poor kid losing his family to that deadly illness.

He tried for weeks to make the kid leave, by treating him badly, pushing him away or anything. But he stood there, he seemed not to care at all.

It wasn’t until he heard the kid talking with his brother that the body had lost all hopes and all meaning of life.

“I want to destroy the whole world before dying.” A shiver ran through his body when the 10-year-old boy said those words.

And it hit him, if he didn’t help him, he would become like his brother. Someone full of hate and anger in his heart. He started searching for information about the illness, looking for doctors and leaving his main mission to the side. He knew Sengoku was going to reprimand him but he didn’t care. He needed to help that kid and not let him fall like his brother did.

It had been three months since Corazon met Law when this one stabbed him on the back. But it didn’t hurt. It was not comparable to the pain that poor child was suffering.

Corazon kept researching, while keeping a low profile and continuing his mission. It wasn’t until he heard Law’s full name that he knew the mission needed to be left aside and get that kid to safety as soon as he could.

Trafalgar D. Water Law. The D. That letter his brother despised so much.

He took Law out of there and once they were far away from the other two kids, he talked to him.

Law was left speechless, that man could talk? Doflamingo said he couldn’t, not after the trauma he suffered.

“You have been lying.” He said.

Corazon sighed. “That doesn’t matter. What matters is that you leave my brother’s side or he will kill you once he finds out about the D in your name.” Law raised an eyebrow.

“I don’t care.” Law said, not showing a sign of emotion. “I will be dead before I turn 13.”

Corazon bite his inner cheek. There was a possibility of saving him, but that meant leaving the mission aside and probably losing everything he earned during his time in the academy.

But he couldn’t care less. He needed to save Law from his cracked date and from becoming a monster like his brother. He knew there was good on that kid and he was not going to give up on it.

“You are coming with me.” Law was small and very light, so it wasn’t difficult for Corazon to carry him and start walking away from that “family”.

“Wait, what?!” Law shouted and started to move, trying to break free. “Where are we going?”

“I think there might be a cure for your illness and I’m going to save you.”

The journey began but Corazon did not expect to encounter obstacles so soon. The doctor he was looking for apparently no longer worked at that hospital, but he was now at another one. When he tried to get the doctors there to see Law, they simply screamed in terror. Causing Law to run away from the apology. Corazon felt his body burn with fury when he saw that poor Law had walked out of there like that.

The days turned into weeks, in each hospital always the same reaction, no one wanted to treat him. Weeks turned into months and Law started to get worse, his skin was even paler and he had lost a lot of weight.

“We will be staying here for a couple of days.” Corazon whispered while he was carrying Law, who was almost asleep. “See if your fever lowers a little bit.” And he put him on the bed.

“I will die soon.” Law whispered.

Law fell asleep minutes after that and Corazon drowned his sorrows in the cheap alcohol of that motel while he looked at the moon and cried because he couldn't do anything for that child.

“Law…” He touched his cheek. “You’re still a rude little boy. And hearing you say “I will die soon” is…” He took a deep breath, trying not to cry so much. “… heartbreaking.” He let out, whipping away the tears that were rolling down his face. “You… stabbed me that day… but it didn’t hurt at all. I know you were the one that was in pain.” Corazon couldn’t stop crying at that moment and walked away, not knowing that Law heard everything and also started crying.

Corazon was woken up by Law’s voice calling.

“Cora-San.” The young kid said. “We should go and eat some breakfast.”

Corazon scratched his eyes, had he heard correctly? “Did you just… call me Cora-San?” Law shrugged and Corazon smiled as she picked him up and laughed.

“Put me down!” Law shouted. “Or I will call you Corazon once again.”

“Alright, alright.” He said laughing. “You feeling better?” He touched his forehead slightly to make sure the fever was over.

Law nodded and they both went to the hotel cafeteria for breakfast. While Law finished breakfast, Corazon made a couple of calls. He knew that Law didn't have long left, but he believed that the information he had obtained this time was correct and would lead them to that doctor.

They traveled hundreds of thousands of kilometers until they finally reached a village in the mountains, where there were barely a hundred inhabitants. The surprise came when Corazon found out that that famous doctor lived even more isolated, in the forest to be more exact, and that most people considered him crazy.

Corazon put those ideas out of his head and with Law in tow he left for that place that the villagers had indicated him. The journey was hard, due to the thick snow that made him sink under his feet and the cold that hammered his bones. Law was fast asleep on his back, his fever had returned and he barely had any strength.

But finally, as the last ray of day faded, they reached the little cabin. Corazon staggered and knocked lightly on the door, barely having any strength left to stand. He heard some murmurings inside and when they opened the door, he could see the figure of a man with a big hat.

Before fading right there, Corazon said. “Please help him…” And everything went dark.

When Corazon came back, he could feel heat and the smell of food. He opened his eyes to see an older woman sitting reading a book. She looked at him and put the book next to her.

“If you are going to stand up, do it calmly. I don’t want to carry your two meters tall body again.” Corazon did as she told him. “I’m Kureha.” She said crossing her legs.

“Rosinante.” He said, touching his head. “But everyone knows me as Corazon.”

She nodded. “So the kid wasn’t lying when he said your name was Corazon.” Corazon opened his eyes.

“Law! Where is he?”

“He is alright, he will be alright.” Corazon felt like a weight was lifted from his shoulders. “Hiriluk is taking care of him.”

“Thank god.” He sighed in relief.

“We were surprised when we saw he had the Amber Lead disease, though everyone died from it. At least that’s what the government made us believe.” She took a bottle of wine for the shelf and started drinking it.

“He is the only survivor.”

“Well it’s a good thing you brought him on time.” A man spoke, Corazon looked at him, he guessed he was the man that the lady mentioned. “He will be alright, but you will need to stay here for a bit before leaving.” Corazon nodded. “I want to make sure his liver expels all the lead from him.”

“Sure… How much I need to…” Corazon stood up.

“If you think I’m going to let you pay me something, you are wrong.” He sat beside the lady, who was still drinking. “I’m a doctor, I’m here to help people.” He then looked at Corazon. “I’m also a father and I know what it is to see your kid suffering and to be desperate to help them. So now focus on resting and everything will be better.”

Corazon nodded and walked to the room where Law was asleep. He sat next to him and in silence he watched him peacefully rest. Maybe he was going to be able to have a peaceful life after all.

Five weeks passed since they arrived at the cabin. Law had gained weight and little by little the white spots on his skin had begun to disappear, although he continued to spend his days in bed, mostly reading or playing with Hiriluk's son, named Chopper. He was only four years old but he liked to play doctor with Law and Law would occasionally read him a medical book that Hiriluk had lying around, even though Chopper didn't understand what Law was reading to him. That day Corazon went down to town, he had to do some shopping, Hiriluk was already doing enough for them, other than being the one who went up and down to buy provisions.

Corazon started going through the forest once he bought everything he needed for the house.

“Brother.” He heard.

His blood froze when he heard that voice, how was it possible? It couldn't be that he was here, it couldn't be. He had to keep pretending, keep making him believe he was on his side and keep him away from Law.

“Stop pretending my dear brother.” He spoke again.

Corazon turned around and looked at him, he was there standing,with a gun in his hand. That was his end, his brother knew everything and like he did with his father he was going to kill him, in that place.

“How?” He whispered.

“Nothing escapes from me, my dear brother.” He smirked. “You thought you could fool me? Mhm you were wrong.”

Corazon frowned and gritted his teeth. “Leave and you will never see me again, I won’t even sell your information to anyone. But go away.”

Doflamingo shook his head. “Where is Law?”

“Leave him alone.”

“I need the kid. Now tell me where is he.”

“Leave him. He is far away from here, you can’t catch him anymore.” Corazon shouted. “Now he is free!”

And then Corazon felt it, like the bullet passed through him, first one and then another and another. The snow around him began to turn crimson and his brother's footsteps began to move away, not only from him but also from the cabin where Law was. He smiled because if he died at least he knew Law would be okay, he could have a peaceful life and he could grow up. Everything would be fine.

“Fortunately I was found by Kureha and I survived.” Corazon sighed. “Then we moved here, Kureha worked some years ago at the local hospital and said it was a peaceful place where my brother wouldn’t find us.” He looked at you. “Don’t cry, it’s all in the past.”

You scrunched your nose and took the handkerchief Corazon handed you. “It hurts me to think that you and Law had to go through all that. Law was so little…” You cried again. “I'm so glad you were there for him and… that you survived that.” Corazon smiled at you and shook his head. “But… Law is with him now, what if…”

“Law is intelligent, he knows what to do and I believe in him. He will come back to us.” He gave you a smile with which you could feel immense relief. Corazon trusts Law and you should do the same too.

“Thank you for telling me this.”

“You’re important to Law, you deserve to know.” And you smiled.

After you calmed down a bit and became calmer, you finished eating and helped Corazon pick up and wash everything. By the time you realized it, the sun was already setting.

You went down the stairs from the porch of Corazon's house, you were still thinking about everything the two of you had talked about. Your heart was still agitated by all the new information. You were walking with Corazon heading towards his car, when you heard a door open, you knew that noise, it was the door of the house where you had been staying. You heard Corazon turn and greet the person leaving the house, Mrs. Smith's grandson you assumed.

Your eyes searched for the figure of the person who now occupied the place where you had been staying weeks ago. You felt the food you had just eaten rise to your mouth and the desire to vomit took over you, when you saw the person's face.

Eustass Kidd

Final note: no Law in this chapter but we got Law’s and Corazon’s past, the backstory is similar to the canon story but making a few changes, bc obviously I couldn’t introduce devil fruits in a modern fanfic, so decided to include Hiriluk and Kureha as part of Law’s and Corazon’s backstory. Also a bit of a cliffhanger with that ending. I hope you enjoyed it and please let me know in comments what you thought about it 🫶

Tag list: @smolracoon25 @phsycochan @punem699 @norasincubi @myeahnaise

[thatone-brightstar]

The Bear & The Fox (Carmy Berzatto x Fem!Reader)

Chapter 10: Bared teeth and knuckles red

Words: 4.8 k

Summary: You finally decide to tell Carmy the truth.

a/n: Please read! Same as last time, don't wanna trigger anyone so, trigger warning: mention of suicide attempt in flashbacks. That is all.

Also, only three more chapters left and all I can say is thank you for enjoying this as much as I loved making it. I had never published anything I had written and you have all been so wonderfully nice that it really has boosted my confidence in writing.

Anywaaay, this one's gonna hurt so I apologize in advance and you can totally yell at me in the comments, but just a head's up I WILL CRY IF YOU DO.

Commenting is always appreciated!!

Your toes had grown red and numb as they dangled yards away from the freezing water. Soft sniffs ached in your chest and your grip on the metal grew unsteady with every gentle cry. The dots of the bright city lights blurred together in your watery eyes, but there was nothing but an unknown serenity lapping at your insides. Like the feeling you get from watching bio luminescent tides illuminate a dark beach with every sway. The night was still, only the light patter of a pair of footsteps that you confused with your heartbeat.

“You don’t want to do that.” A deep voice called from your far right and your body jerked towards the noise.

You scoffed at the tall man, too calm for someone who had stumbled into that uncommon situation. “I don’t even fuckin’ know you, dude.” You rolled your eyes and faced the water again.

“True..” He said, placing a cig between his lips and lighting the end. “but I do know that if you jump from this height, you’ll just end up crippled.”

“Well I don’t know how to swim, so I’ll probably just drown.” You answered with the same bitterness.

“Hardcore” He whispered, then slowly walked to rest his elbows a few feet away from you. 

The man took a long drag, the ember showering his strong features in an orange hue. Your eyes flickered from the burning tip to his face, only looking away when he turned towards you.

“You smoke?” He asked and you shrugged lightly. He pulled the beaten packet from inside his jean jacket with measured movements and slowly offered it to you. “How ‘bout one for the road, kid?”

You doubted for a second, then uncurled your frozen fingers from the bar and stretched out your arm to the man. In a flash, one of his hands gripped your wrist while the other circled your waist and hoisted you up and away from the edge. The world swiveled for a short second as you both fell safely against the snow covered path. You thrashed around in his grip, legs and arms swaying violently as a thousand screams were ripped from the deepest parts of your chest. But no matter your attempts, the man maintained a calm composure.

It was only when your screams died down to soft whimpers and your surroundings flashed with red and blue, that the numbness abandoned your body and you finally felt the cold seep through your clothes as you sat alone in the middle of the bridge. It was then that you heard his gentle words echo for hours in your head.

“You’ll thank me one day, kid. I promise.”

“Is it too much purple, Ms. F?” Kenny asked from his end of the small semi circle, pulling you away from the thick waves of your mind.

“Hmm? N-no no, that looks really good, Ken. Great job…” 

Your phone vibrated softly from one of the pockets of your apron, creasing your brow when Syd’s name flashed on the screen. A few indications were given to the kids before excusing yourself a few yards away to answer the call.

“Hey, everything ok-”

“I stabbed Richie.” Syd’s shaky voice interrupted.

“Y-You what?”

“And I walked out. I stabbed Richie and then walked out. I-In that order.”

You were silent for a few seconds, not knowing how to answer accordingly, because what does one say when someone’s confessed to stabbing someone, albeit a shitty someone, but still a someone. 

“H-how… did that happen?” You asked instead.

“Cause your stupid asshole boyfriend went bat shit crazy when I fucked up the to-go’s!” She began rambling about some software update in the system and how she had forgotten to block out the schedule, so by the time they were ready to open, they were already behind on hundreds of orders they hadn’t prepped for.

“Jesus, Syd! And you left them alone with that mess?!” You angrily whispered at your phone.

“You think I don’t know that?! I know I screwed up, okay? But when I tried to figure it out, Carmen got all up in my face and wouldn’t listen! He started fucking yelling at everyone and I was so pissed, and Richie- God Richie- h-he basically stepped into my knife. I know it wasn’t that bad, but I didn’t stay around to check.” She finished.

You heard her shallow breaths on the other end and waited for her to calm down. 

“D’you think I should go back?” She asked, when her voice had stopped shaking.

“Yes… but it’s too late now, it’ll probably piss him off more. Go home, sleep it off and try to solve it with a clear head in the morning.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” She heaved in a heavy sigh that ended with a groan. “You-erh- you gonna tell ‘em… today?”

“I mean, I want to do it less now but… what’s one more bad news to throw into the dumpster fire that is today, right?”

Syd snorted ironically into the mic, her shaky breathes had slowly started to regulate.

“Alright, well call me if you need anything.”

“Yeah, you too.”

You hung up and saved your phone back into your apron. The void in your chest happily feeding itself with the bad news, only growing stronger and wrapping its roots around your ribs. Checking the time made you realize there were still a couple hours left until your shift was up, but it didn’t feel nearly as long as you needed to grow a pair and tell Carmy. 

Usually, you were great at keeping secrets. It came with the territory of being the eldest daughter and having an overprotective single mother. There were so many midnight escapades where you’d go smoke weed with your friends at the park that you’d take to the grave. Or the insignificant containers of lipgloss you'd steal as a teen just for the thrill of it, that now lived untouched at the bottom of your drawer. You always joked that, apart from your family and closest friends, you didn’t really have a conscience to listen to, or anything that could make you feel guilty over most things. Which is why the void that had been living in your stomach for the past weeks felt foreign and uncomfortable with every passing day that you did nothing about it. 

You hadn’t been sleeping either. The moment you felt your body drift away, your mind was clouded by the mirage of tired baggy eyes and a large grizzly bear on the snow padded bridge. The thunderous growl always jerked you awake and with sore lungs and dew over your brow, you’d move from the restraining covers into the small sanctuary in the living room.  The tiredness displayed itself proudly over your face, sitting heavy in the bags it had nursed under your dull eyes, for everyone to see.

It was one of the reasons you had been avoiding Carmy for weeks. No amount of concealer would cover them up and you knew that the moment he spotted your slouched shoulders, he’d know something was wrong. He probably already did. The time between your texts had grown larger, always hiding behind a ‘sorry, been busy’ or ‘fell asleep’. All because you couldn’t bare to tell your boyfriend the truth. You knew you’d have to eventually, the longer it took, the worse his reaction would be once you decided to finally tell him.

‘Today.’ You mumbled to yourself while getting ready, ’I’m gonna do it today.’ But as the day grew older, so did the regret of having to follow through with your own self imposed promise.

**********

The blank canvas sitting expectant in front of you worked perfectly to help you dissociate since the moment you sat down. The blue paint you had been chipping from your nails was long gone, but the repetitive action continued, leaving small streaks of red stinging by the time you washed your hands to leave. You expected to at least have half an explanation by the time you made the short walk to the restaurant, however, your brain seemed to have forgotten any trace of the English dictionary in your vocabulary. Only the simplest words remained and that was not nearly enough to explain the strange situation you found yourself in. 

The lights inside The Beef glowed a menacing white and the silence was so intense, you could even hear the electricity flowing through the fluorescents.

“Yo! We’re closed!” Yelled Richie’s voice from the side room once he heard the bell by the glass door ding, then you saw him slowly move towards you, with a rather noticeable limp. “Short stack! Nice of you to show up after we got our asses beat.”

“Yeah, heard you got it stabbed too…”

He threw a middle finger in your direction and limped past the counter and to the empty back where everyone seemed to have fled after the rough day.

“Mind if I take a look?” You asked him, dropping your bag on one of the tables.

“What, you ain’t gonna take me to dinner first?” Despite the tiredness behind his voice, he still managed to be just as annoying.

You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms. “Chill, alright? My mom’s a nurse, she taught me a couple stuff.”

“ ‘M fine, Ebra already patched me up, so no need to go all fuckin’ Doogie Howser on me, okay?”

You didn’t have the energy to protest or to even make fun of his old ass reference, so you just raised your hands and mumbled an irritated ‘Fine, I don’t fucking care anyway’ and walked past him to the office.

You saw Carmy hunched over the piles of invoices scattered around his desk, arms tensely resting on the firm wood and wisps of smoke floating in the thin air. You could guess how bad the day had been by the multiple stains on his regularly white shirt and by the strained muscles locked sturdily under the material. You stood frozen by the door, a sudden wave of fear washing over you at the idea that there was no way that this would not end terribly.

You swallowed the dryness that had accumulated in your throat and reached up a shaky hand to knock at the door. His eyes were dark and intense when he turned to you and a heavy breath filled his lungs as he observed you up and down. 

“Hey…” He greeted with a nod, then turned back to the mess of papers.

“I’d -uh- I’d ask how your day’s been but…” You said, pushing yourself deeper in the room and shoving your hands in your back pockets.

Carmy nodded slowly, letting his forehead fall over yours when you reached his side and taking in another deep sigh. “Sydney tell you?”

“Briefly, but yeah…”

“Marcus walked out too.” He said dryly, pulling away and raking his hand through his matted hair.

“What happened?”

“I dunno. I thought everything was finally going better a-and then it’s one thing after the next and I just… I snapped.” He confessed.

Your brows screwed in confusion, “But you’re used to yelling in the kitchen-”

“Yes, but this was different. I don’t know what took over me. I-It was like my mouth and my brain had no filter and all the words just came spewing out. Like I wanted them to feel like shit, like I needed them to feel what I feel every-fuckin’-day here.” He threw himself on the office chair and rested his heated face on his hands.

“Did you mean it?” You asked after a few moments. “What you said to them, did you mean it?”

Carmy dragged his hands down to his mouth, tired eyes fixed on yours, then shook his head ‘no’ slowly.

“Then maybe you can tell them that… Once you’ve all cooled down, of course.”

He was silent, brows knitted together in contemplation. “Ye-yeah no, I know-I will.” He finally said, rubbing his thumb to the inside of his palm and staring at you again. “Hey, uh… C-can I ask you somethin’?” 

Fuck. You didn’t trust your voice to answer, so you just nodded, hands curling tightly around the edge of the desk that hit your back.

“Are we… good? Cause you kinda went all cold turkey on me…” He said with a humorless breath that made the knot in your throat double in size.

“I was kinda hopin’ you didn’t notice that…” You whispered and he slowly stood from his chair to reach out for your hand.

“‘Course I would notice.” He shrugged and took a step closer to you, tilting his head to see your eyes fixated on the file cabinet behind him. “Is everything alright?”

You swallowed hard, it felt like razor blades going down your throat as you tried to figure out what to say or how to start. His thumb grazed softly at your chin, pulling your face up and forcing your worried stare to meet his. Despite the generous bags that decorated his eyes, the look he gave you was swarmed with devotion. As if there were something more weighted behind it that his body couldn’t hold and it was filtering through the cracks. His stare made the guilt inside you grow even larger, roots now too deep to be pulled out. 

In a few seconds of selfishness, you pushed yourself off the desk and closed the little distance between your faces, carefully wrapping your lips around his. He answered back instantly, circling his hard arm around you and pulling you closer to him. You kissed him hard and you kissed him long, because the pessimist in you insisted that it’d be the last time you’d be able to after tonight. It was selfish, yes, but at least you would have a sweet trace of his lips to remember before everything went to shit. 

His grip on you tightened, teeth pulling at your bottom lip with contained insistence. He needed the kiss too. After weeks of not seeing you and the worry that he might have done something wrong to scare you away, having you back in his arms was a surprise ending he did not expect for a hellish day.

But you pulled away too quickly and the way your eyes had begun to water at the corners constricted his chest. He didn’t say anything, instead rubbed his calloused thumb in circles over your tender cheek.

“There’s something I need you to know,” You whispered with a soft sniff that pulled the threatening tears back down. “A-and I’m not sure how you’ll feel about… us, after.”

His frown deepened, pulling away only slightly but it felt like a crater had opened up between you.

“O-kay… What, d’you cheat on me or somethin’?” He joked lightly, trying to lighten the somber mood.

“No, no of course not!” Your answer was rushed. “It’s more complicated than that…”

You took his hand and led him to his chair, then sat cross-legged on one of the short file cabinets that faced him. With a few deep breaths and your heartbeat heavy in your throat, you began.

“Fuck, okay. So before I started working here, I used to work privately.”

“Rich folks in Lincoln, I remember.” He added.

“Yeah, e-except I didn’t really tell you the whole truth…” You gripped your hands together to stop the light trembling and took another hefty breath.

“I was fresh out of culinary school when I got the job. Joyce’s fiancé actually got it for me, one of his co workers had recently widowed and he needed help with the meals for him and his daughter. They’re lawyers, so the  pay was really good. My grandma was a bit sick at the time and we needed the money for her treatments. So I took the job.” Your breath seemed to thin out as the images formed in your head once again.

“Everything was fine for the first few months, y’know I just went in a couple days a week, meal prepped, left dinner then went home. I was the ghost that fed them.” You sneered, eyes fixed on your locked hands and only his bouncing thigh in your view. 

“Then uh, the guy -Isaac– started showing up earlier. He would.. ask about my day and how my grandma was doing while I made dinner for him and his six year old. He even drove me home sometimes, when it was too late or too rainy to take the train. There was a hail storm, around June last year, that closed off everything and I couldn’t go home so he let me stay in the spare room. We got to talking and…” Your eyes wandered over his face for a fraction of a second, but it was enough to see how his jaw had locked tight and he held an inexpressive façade.

“Long story short, he was nice and I was young and stupidly naive, so we started dating. Everything was good for a couple months until… Turns out his wife wasn’t really dead - just… abroad.”  

You finally had the courage to look up at him, slight surprise evident in his raised brows and he leaned back. then took one of his hands to rub around his mouth and chin.

“Shit…” He whispered.

“...Yeah. I, um, I was making dinner one night, some sort of celebration -I can’t really remember for what-, I wasn’t even supposed to be there, but I wanted to surprise him… and they just walked in, like nothing.” The image of your fingers began to blur together under the sheer coat of water covering your eyes. “Isaac told her I was just some girl he tried to help out, but that I became obsessed with him a-and that he had tried to fire me.”

The silence in the small room was deafening. Just your ragged breaths and his barely controlled ones.

“She slapped me. Called me a homewrecker and a whore. And threatened to call the cops on me if I didn’t leave immediately, so… I did.”

Carmy stayed silent, waiting for you to continue, but you needed to take a couple calming breaths before doing so. You hadn’t spoken about this with anyone outside your therapist and it was proving to be harder than you expected.

“He tried calling me weeks after. trying to apologize but I blocked his number and every other number he’s been using to call me since.”

Your shuddering breaths permeated in the small room, as you let him take in the information you had spilled all over the floor. Carmy’s eyes were on you, but looking through you, lost in thought. 

“Is that why you reacted that way when Richie lied about Sugar?” You nodded slowly and something seemed to finally click behind his eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me before?” His voice was hoarse and barely controlled.

“I dunno…” You confessed in a breath. “I guess I was scared. I didn’t want you to think the worst of me. I think I’ve just grown so used to dealing with everything on my own that I didn’t want to be a burden to you…”

Carmy stood from his chair and crouched down beside you, hands holding both sides of your face and eyes glazed.

“Look at me-” He whispered and you did. “Please don’t do that shit, okay? Don’t hide from me and close yourself off- I hate that shit. You’ll never be a burden to me, alright? Not now, not ever.”

The guilt in your chest pulled once more and you felt your ribs concave with the pressure and force, a new batch of tears flooded your eyes that distorted the painful image of his saddened face.

“Is that why you’ve been acting so weird lately?” He asked.

You shook your head and bit your bottom lip with force.

“A month after that, my grandma got worse and I couldn’t find another job in the area. She- his wife- told all her friends that I tried to take her husband -which was complete bullshit- so no one would hire me. I was really depressed and it felt like everything was falling apart. I-”

Your chest shook again at the feeling of his thumb rubbing circles on your skin. 

“Hey, it’s okay. You don’t have to-“

“No, I do.” You argued, sniffing hard. “I-I used to drive Joshua’s car before. I… guess it was my car back then. One night, they called from the hospital to let us know she had passed. -I don’t know what happened- I just got so overwhelmed that I took the keys and ran out the house. I didn’t even bother to take my shoes…” You stuttered, rubbing the sweat from your hands on your jeans. “So I-I was driving barefoot and in shock and it had just snowed so the roads were slippery a-and I’ve never been the best driver-.” You were rambling, too scared to reach the part of your story that really mattered to him.

“I don’t really remember much of that, just… the loud crash and how my vision spotted for a few seconds.” Your brows were furrowed deep in a scowl, eyes fixed on the tattoo on his left bicep but not really there. 

Carmy’s breath had caught in his throat as he hung on your every word.

“I c-crash… on one of the pillars of the state street bridge. But I wasn’t hurt, o-or at least I don’t remember feeling it. I just remember this… pain in my chest -like I had been stabbed- and the snow nipping at my feet when I got out the car.” You bit your tongue as you tried to continue. Like your body was stopping itself from speaking aloud. 

You cleared your throat from the salty taste of iron. “I um… I remember standing in the middle of the bridge. For what felt like hours. Then the idea just popped into my head and it seemed like the most logical thing…” You whispered. “Like it would silence all my thoughts so I just… Fuck, I-I… climbed over the railings and almost threw myself into the water.” You struggled to say, no longer holding back the fresh batch that spilled from your eyes.

“That night on the bridge…um-” You couldn’t think of the right words to use, if there even were any to deliver such shattering information. “There was a man…” His eyes caught on yours and something inside them understood where you were headed, because his hands loosened their grip by your sides.

You shut  your eyes hard, you couldn’t do it with his painful stare burning into you. 

“I-It was Mikey, Carmy… who pulled me from the ledge. Before I could jump.” 

Your cheeks felt cold as he pulled himself away. You opened your eyes to find his hardened gaze frozen on you and he shook his head slowly.

“W-what? No, no he-”

“I’m sorry Bear I-”

“You’re fuckin screwin’ with me, aren’t you?”

He stood to his full height and raked both his hands through his hair. You stayed seated, something about the situation made you feel like a scolded child.

“No! I swear I didn’t know it was him-” You rambled, unlocking yourself from your seated position and taking a step towards him.

“Bullshit!” He shouted, turning to you.

“It’s true!” You shouted back, your voice broke at the end from the force. “I found out from the pictures at your sister’s…”

His jaw was tense as he continued to shake his head. “No-no, that doesn’t make sense… Why would he save you then sho-” He stopped himself before the words even formed in his mouth.

“You think I would know?! It’s been eating me alive for weeks!”

His stare was hard and intense, it made you squirm under it for the longest minute, until he decided to speak.

“When?”

“January…” Your voice was barely a whisper.

“Did he… did he say somethin’ to you?” 

“I cant-”

“What did he say?” He asked again with bared teeth.

“He said ‘You don’t want to do that’.” You answered defeated.

“What else?”

“T-that’s it…”

“Bullshit! What else?!”

“I’m telling you the truth!” You snapped. Angry tears rolled down your cheeks, but he didn’t seem to care.

“So, what?!You came lookin’ for me cause you owe him some kinda favor?! Are you just tryna pay it forward or some shit!?”

You stared at him bewildered, your chest ached from the lack of air and your ribs seemed to crack with his every word.

“What the hell would make you think that?!” You sneered back.

“Or did he tell you to come lookin’ for me?! Didn’t trust his stupid little brother to survive out in the world alone?!”  His expression had grown somber towards you, the eyes you had grown to love now looked at you with nothing but uncontained rage. 

 “Carmy, I’ve been nothing but honest-”

“Oh that’s a load of crap and you know it!” Carmy mocked. “Were you planning on telling me? If it hadn’t been Mikey -if it was someone else who saw you that night- were you gonna tell me?”

Your eyes darted around the room, his gaze too intense to hold. You heard his kitchen shoes squeak as he took a step towards you and the dance felt all too familiar inside your mind.

He whispered your name, painful and slow. “Answer me, please.” He begged and you dragged your tear stained eyes to his bloodshot ones.

You shook your head slowly. He rubbed his hand over his mouth painfully hard and turned his back to you, sniffing loudly into the ceiling.

“Remember what you said to me, the first night you stayed over?” He asked, turning to you. “You said ‘you know I really care about you’ right? And you said that if whatever this was, was gonna work out, then we should  tell each other this kinda stuff, even the ugly. You said that, okay? You.” He took a second to breathe, turning away from you again and taking his hand in his hair. “A-and now you’re telling me all this shit that you had to tell me only cause my brother’s the one that stopped you from-” Carmy stopped himself with a sharp intake. 

“Go ahead.” You sneered. “Finish it.”

“Guess you were right. “ he said instead, Avoiding your eyes. “It only works out when we tell each other this kind of stuff.” You heard a crack deep inside your chest. “And we didn’t so…”

“Carmy, your not being fair-“ 

“No- you don’t get to say that, alright?!” He shouted, “Not when you ask me to be honest with you, but you can’t do the same with me!” Carmy took another step towards you and your reflexes made you take one back.

His shoulders fell slightly and his hardened eyes flickered around you for a few seconds before turning to the desk.

“I don’t have time for this crap…” He whispered with his attention heavy on the pile of unpaid accounts resting tauntingly.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You asked, though the answer you already knew.

“It means-” He sighed shakily. “God, y’know I…” His mouth pressed into a thin line while he argued with himself over what he could admit.  “-I really fuckin’ love you.” Your brows raised in surprise and the words knocked out any trace of oxygen in your cells. “But I have too much on my back already to deal with this shit right now…”

You scanned the blurry floor, then the desk and even the ceiling, anything that could take your attention from the stabbing sensation that you knew too well in your chest. “Okay.” Is all you whispered.

“Everything’s shit and-”

“It’s fine.” You answered a bit more harshly than you intended. “I get it.”

You wrapped your arms around yourself, doing your best to hold in all the pieces together, then walked past his defeated frame - avoiding any sort of contact. Before turning the corner, you stopped yourself, knowing the simple words would eat you from the inside if you didn’t let them out..

“If it's worth anything… I love you too.” You whispered and the tenseness of his back proved he heard you. “Just so you know…”

Your legs numbly carried you to your bag, then out the front door and with the last ounce of energy in you, you dialed the one person you trusted the most.

He picked up at the second ring. “What do you want?”

“Joshua, I’m at the restaurant. Can you please pick me up?” You whispered between tears.

“Shit-” You heard shuffling, the sound of keys then the slam of a door. “Y-yeah, yeah sure. You okay?”

“No…”

“Fuck, okay. I’ll be there in ten.” Your brother answered in a rush. “And Fox?”

“Yeah?”

“...Don’t do anything stupid, okay?”

A humorless laugh fell from your throat. “Okay.” 

Chapter 11.

Taglist: @pearlstiare @teteminne, @beebslebobs, @harrysmatcha, @yum-yahgurt, @pussy-f41ry and that’s it lmao

[upslapmeal]

Boom

So I had vaguely seen things about Moffat coming back, but I'd always interpreted the 'next' series as being... the NEXT series. after the upcoming one. anyway BIG ol' surprise in the opening titles lol

are these those anglican marines back from what?? s5? s6?

....is this a flashback? I think those guys had the same name

we're finding out he swapped a duty and now he's injured

oh wait it’s not a flashback lmao

this is where being bad at faces fails me

is this an american ambulance situation where they cost too much and ruin your life?

ah

they ruin your life in another significant way

‘villengard’ assuming this is pre-bananas lol

*dramatically throws open tardis doors* 'someone needs me!!!'

Fifteen’s theme is so good

Moffat??????? well that explains the anglican marines

Fifteen is excellent at answering questions. shame they're not the questions Ruby is asking

‘one wrong move and boom’ eyy title drop

when can Twelve and Fifteen bond over capitalism and being scottish

‘i’m not even screaming. yet.’ yeah

‘it’s going to be tricky’ ‘it’s going to be a MOMENT YEAH’

gotta think of health and safety at war what can I say! only the finest ventilated air before our ambulances murder you

Ruby on her first planet <3 (though only now after 6 months?? Fifteen you've been slacking clearly!)

‘he was being sMELTED??’ ‘it’s a good word smelted’ 'NOT AT THE MOMENT???’ obviously Fifteen's not having the best time but poor Ruby lmao

‘ooooh I am. havin’ a day 🙃🙃’ never has a Doctor been so me. minus the landmine.

Ruby don’t make the Doctor laugh when he’s balancing on one leg!!

oh man the Doctor really IS having a day

ok those soldiers are definitely not the same guy lol but I could have sworn they had the same name!

‘everything is possible. everywhere is a beach eventually’ RIP Mundy left out of that lil callback to earlier

Ruby grabbing the gun, shooting it and yelling is v much banging the pipes in Space Babies lol

love that her instinct is make noise and yell, think later

meanwhile Splice is chilling with her lil photo album

…did I mishear shoot me little bitch??

oh lol ‘shoot me a little bit'

nooo Ruby!!

‘I can’t think unless I’m talking and I can only talk to you’ oh that is VERY Twelve Clara

and also a lot to put on someone you’ve known for so little time that they’re only just seeing their first planet RIP

Fifteen: do you get it do you get it!! Ruby: 😴

'there are no Kastarions’ big Doctor’s Daughter vibes

Thirteen: have faith!!! <3 Fifteen: >:(

love fifteen giving his big speech with snot running down his lip. giving Nine in Dalek

‘how much of the countdown left’ ‘3 minutes maybe’ I mean you said 5 minutes 4 minutes ago

speaking of which what is the point of assessing for life and having a countdown if it just blows anyway

(to give it flashy lights and features I know)

bud I appreciate the romance going on here but now is maybe not the time

oh yeah very much not the time

…..delighted that Ruby hasn’t been smelted. yet.

(.....also 3 minutes have now passed. where is the boom the title promised!!)

the deaths are stacking up and Splice is just having the best chill time lol

oh the ambulance is the twist lady!

just for the record it took that failsafe 8 minutes to trigger

lol poor confused Ruby. honestly rude to die and miss the action

there’s the closeup from the trailer!!

who knew that serene deep breath came shortly after prolonged near death by landmine

‘he’s not gone. he’s just dead’ <3

‘you keep the faith Splice’ there we go

‘snow isn’t snow until it falls’ maybe it’s just my love for Twelve’s era but I’ve been endeared to these nonsense Moffatisms lol

ok looking at the credits those characters have different names but they're still similar! you can’t have two characters with similar names played by incredibly similar-looking people and expect us to tell them apart??

WAIT HANG ON

varada sethu????? as in new companion???????

is Mundy coming back?????? or is this a Karen Gillan situation?

Really enjoyed this one!! Easily my fave of the first three, very tense and WHAT a showcase for Ncuti!!! Absolute powerhouse. However. On rewatch I really did notice how much Ruby was written like Clara lol. Ah Moff you've got your strengths and weaknesses like us all

[shrekgogurt]

The rumors are true! I posted Chapter 13 of IKBAIKAM last week.

Now, onto the next! I hope y’all are ready for quite the vibe shift toward a beach episode where only one of them is actually at the beach. However, before then we’ve got a flashback. I hope you enjoy this rather farcical excerpt despite it being far more than six sentences 😔

Baz POV, past—age almost thirteen

[Snow] tightens his grip on the stolen silverware that I assume he keeps on him in case of pastry related emergencies and repeats, “The cat, Baz! Where’s the cat?”

“What cat?”

“The cat you were threatening with your gun! I heard it screeching from the corridor!”

Great.

I spent my entire Christmas holiday learning to read a treble clef only for the result to sound like a dying animal.

I’m more than awful at playing the violin. I’m ghastly, gruesome, violently unpleasant. I’m resolute to never pick up an instrument again. Truly, I’d like to die on the spot. Killed by my rude roommate and the humiliation of failure.

Wait…did he say ‘my gun’?

just tags under the cut

I’m early! Y’all get tagged first!

@alexalexinii @artsyunderstudy @bookish-bogwitch @brilla-brilla-estrellita @captain-aralias @cutestkilla @dani-vc @ebbpettier @emeryhall @erzbethluna @excalisbury @facewithoutheart @fatalfangirl @hagnoart @hushed-chorus @iamamythologicalcreature @ileadacharmedlife @ineffable-grimm-pitch @j-nipper-95 @larkral @letraspal @messofthejess @mooncello @nausikaaa @ninemagicks @nightimedreamersworld @onepintobean @palimpsessed @prettygoododds @raenestee @rimeswithpurple @roomwithanopenfire @theearlgreymage @theimpossibledemon @thewholelemon @urban-sith @valeffelees @whogaveyoupermission @yellobb @youarenevertooold @you-remind-me-of-the-babe

[cough-ka]

when they go out the back door and he reaches around to open the door in front of her AHHHH this was written by someone who knows how love works

also unpopular opinion but making it invisible string is so much better than snow on the beach! snow on the beach would've been too on the nose and i feel like we're saving it for a flashback for when they're back at the house together next season

[marciaillust]

Thank you so much for Ecdysis. I only got around to read it today and urgh, my heart. Get this poor boy (Kazuma) a hug. But you gave him so much more (Ryuunosuke).

Somewhat chronological things that stood out to me: I loved the little snowman to indicate the change of seasons. And I was very glad to see the chibis in the following scene; it's just something I associate with you ever since The Clockmaster. I know you can draw hands; I think they look so well because you draw the nails. Anyway, this time I paid more attention to the ears though. You mentioned drawing lots of heads in different postition and the ears fit each time.

Again, thank you very much for creating and sharing this.

Hi! Thank you so much for the lovely message, it made me so happy to hear about all the little details you noticed about Ecdysis!

Ever since I started working on it I knew that I wanted the comic to encapsulate the timespan of about one year (leaving out all the flashbacks of course) and I spent some time thinking of quick visual indicators that would communicate the passage of time. The little snowman is one of them, another one would be the cherry tree outside Ryuunosuke's dorm room

from a blooming spring scenery, to slowly losing petals, cherries and in the very last frame of it it loses its final leaf :,)

A big part of all the background work for me was communicating the feeling of "temporariness" that Kazuma is so fixated on. Butterflies famously have week long lifespans. His footsteps in the snow get covered up by the new snow falling, and their footsteps on the beach get washed away by the sea. The foliage wastes away. And when he looks at Ryuunosuke on that final page on the beach there are a few shooting stars, beautiful yet gone in less than a second. All the while the snake stays and only grows in sizeeeee ; 0 ;

Thank you for the compliments about the anatomy! Ears have lowkey become my special point of interest when drawing heads, I feel like over the last year of making this comic I realised how much they can elevate the sense position/rotation of the head. Ears are objects with a lot of intricate details and it's kinda cool to try and capture all of them from an angle. I remember when I started drawing comics half a decade ago my ears had only 3 modes aka full on front ear (just a little C shape on the side of the head), full on side ear (90% of the ears were this ear lol), and the full on back ear ( which tbh is almost nonexistent in real life but gosh manga and anime is right about how it immediately puts a shitty head in perspective lol).

My newly found favourite ear to draw is the 3/4 back view when you can still see the iconic C swirl but also the back of the ear does a little peekaboo

Thank you so so much for reading Ecdysis! I put a lot of love into it and it means the world to me to hear you enjoyed it! :)

[zzoomacroom]

Last Line Challenge

Rules: in a new post, show the last line you wrote (or drew) and tag as many people as there are words (or however many as you like).

Thank you for the tag, @kydrogendragon! 💗💗💗

Today I've been working on outlining the Retired!Dream mpreg fic (sequel to "The Seeds Are Bursting, The Springs Are Seeping"), which is turning out to be a lot longer and more involved than I originally planned. I'm researching and learning a lot about goddesses of fertility/pregnancy/childbirth! Yes, this is a very cracky fic, but I'm having fun with it. 😅

The last thing I actually wrote is from "Nothing But Flowers," which is my 2089 fic where Hob is the last person on Earth. This scene is a flashback that takes place right after the beach dream from Sunday Mourning, although I fiddled around with the timeline for plot reasons so that he talks to Death after that dream instead of before (there's an in-universe explanation for that later in the story, but I might cut that out if it gets too convoluted).

Content warnings: heavy angst, Hob being really mean and unfair to Death (don't worry, it all gets resolved and everyone lives happily ever after...eventually):

He remembers being happy when he awoke. He was still crying, and exhausted, and more than a little drunk, but happy. Morpheus had said he loved him. He’d said he’d come back. But Death said otherwise. It had taken him a moment to place her, but he recognized her when he awoke. He had flashes of memory—meeting her on the battlefield, on frozen winter streets, at the bottom of a lake. He told her about the dream he’d had. He thought she’d be happy that he was alive after all. But when he told her he had faith that he would be back, that he’d promised he would wait, she had simply given him a sad smile. “That was just a dream, Hob,” she says gently, like she’s talking to a bloody child. “He’s gone. He took my hand and I brought him to the Sunless Lands.” “I don’t believe you,” he says flatly. “It’s never just a dream. You should know that, you’re his sister.” “I’m sorry, Hob,” is all she says in reply. Her kind, dark eyes brim with tears, and for a moment she looks just like him, even though they look about as different as two siblings possibly can. “No. That’s a load of bollocks,” he declares. How can she be so infuriatingly calm about this? How can that be all she has to say? “And if you are right, you ought to be ashamed of yourself for taking him. Sorry excuse for a sister, you are.” That was over the line. He knows it the moment the words are out of his mouth. But he continues to stare her down defiantly. Her smile only falters for a second, and in that second he sees her as she truly is. He sees the rot and decay, the pointless waste of billions of lives, the darkness at the end of it all. He sees a wolf doggedly pursuing its prey through the bleak winter night, tearing into tender flesh, spilling blood on the snow, leaving the bones for the vultures. He sees the inevitable end of all things, all creatures, even himself. His breath hitches, but he does not look away. “You only see half of the truth, Hob. He made his choice, as you made yours.” Her eyes are still warm, but her voice has turned icy. “Which reminds me: do you still wish to live?” “You...how dare you? No, really, how fucking dare you?” he snaps. “You don’t get to ask me that. And at a time like this...yes, I bloody well still want to live. And no, I’ll never want to stop living. Not if it means you will be the one waiting for me at the end. Leave me the fuck alone, and don’t bother asking again.” He knows he’s being unfair. Childish. Cruel. He doesn’t care. “Even if you’re right—and I don’t believe you are, not for a second—but if you’re right, if it’s true I’ll never see him again, I’m still never going to die. I promise you that.” She waits impassively while he finishes his tirade. She smiles again, but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes this time. “Very well. You’ve made your choice, although you may come to regret it one day. But if that’s what you wish, then I won’t speak to you again unless you call for me. Goodbye, Hob.” He doesn’t answer. And then she’s walking away, leaving him slumped over his beer (or had he been sitting under a tree? Had she even been there at all?). He buries his face in his hands and weeps silently. He really hadn’t believed her, at first. But now...now he thinks she must have been telling the truth, much as he hates to admit it. It’s been sixty years and not a single word. True, he’s gone more than double that without seeing him, but...it’s different now. He dreams about him sometimes, of course, but it’s not him. He knows the difference. Besides, it’s not like dreams mean anything anymore, not without him to govern them. It’s just his desperate, pathetic mind reminding him of what he’s lost. She must have been right. She would know better than anyone, after all. He’d just been too stupid and too stubborn to accept it. He’s gone, and Hob is all alone, and that’s that.

No pressure tags: @tryan-a-bex @tj-dragonblade @fleabagoftheendless @signiorbenedickofpadua @delta-pavonis @mallory-x and anyone else who wants to join in! (If anyone I tagged has already been tagged, feel free to link your post in the comments if you want! I'm always curious about what my mutuals are working on!)

[ilovebylersblog]

sokeefe throughout the books (taylor’s version)

kotlc: enchanted

exile: it’s nice to have a friend, fearless

everblaze: i’m only me when i’m with you, gold rush

neverseen: everything has changed, hey stephen, mine, jump then fall, run, wonderland, forever winter, i wish you would, death by a thousand cuts

lodestar: i knew you were trouble, if this was a movie, innocent, back to december, haunted, afterglow, the way i loved you, this love, treacherous, the very first night, betty, how you get the girl, love story

nightfall: begin again, i know places, out of the woods, you’re not sorry, the last time, the other side of the door, style, false god, stay stay stay, i think he knows, miss americana and the heart break prince

flashback: delicate, you belong with me, august (keefe pov), untouchable, dress, Question…?, the 1, speak now, right where you left me, teardrops on my guitar,

legacy: ivy, illicit affairs, cruel summer, high infidelity, sweet nothing, cowboy like me, gorgeous, wildest dreams

unlocked: don’t blame me, new years day, sad beautiful tragic, exile, right where you left me, all you had to do was stay, i almost do, last kiss, my tears ricochet

stellarlune: come back be here, message in a bottle, cardigan, state of grace, labyrinth, sparks fly, daylight, you are in love, snow on the beach, lavender haze, dancing with our hands tied, the archer, the great war, paris, call it what you want, ours, king of my heart, mastermind, end game

[trashbag-baby666]

Between Tridents and Knives-Finnick Odair

Chapter Four.

Chapter Summar: Flashback chapter to the reaping of the 74th Hunger Games!

W/C: 2,158

C/W: none?

Series Masterlist!

The Reaping For The 74th Hunger Games.

District Four.

Fawn sat down on the provided chairs for the past victors of District Four. Finnick grabbed her hand fast as she crossed one leg over the other.

Fawns stylist had her dressed in a long dark blue dress, nothing flashy but simple. Her necklace from Finnick inspired this dress, the neck was high and sleeveless.

It wasn’t cold by any means during the month of May in District Four.

But she felt cold, it was her and Finnick's year mentoring again.

Every year they held the victors at the capital for special viewing events and dinners. Not required but since Fawn and Finnick were capital jewels they had no choice.

She would usually stand at the drink table gulping down glasses of champaign, that's how she really got to know Haymitch.

“Slow down or we're gonna be similar.” Haymitch looked at his glass of whiskey and then at Fawn. At the time she couldn’t have been more than 20. She never got used to the sights of seeing children kill each other. A way that she had done about three years prior.

“Not the same,” Fawn scoffed, taking another champagne glass, “I only drink at these events.”

“Yeah that's how it starts,” Haymitch smirked, he was famously a drunken problem everywhere, sloppy, gross, a mess.

“Well if it's up to Snow I won’t end up like you.” Fawn sighed, thinking of the appearance she had to keep up.

“Ah, yes you and Finnick, the desirable ones.” Haymitch rolled his eyes and took another glass of whiskey.

Fawn wished she wasn’t a desirable victor, she’d do anything to have a normal life outside of being a victor.

“Yeah full hysterectomy done at 18. That's desirable and glamorous.” Fawn scoffed, another thing she wanted to personally slit Snow's throat for.

She didn’t want kids and made that clear to Finnick, she wasn’t risking having her children reaped for the games. But something like having a hysterectomy was a decision she wanted to make for herself instead of being forcibly mutilated by Snow.

Fawn sighed from feeling the comforting hands of Finnicks on her own as he rested their intertwined hands in his lap. Finnick had on a suit with the same colored blazer and pants with a white button up.

He knew how much Fawn didn’t want to be here, hell no one wanted to be here.

Finnick rubbed his calloused hand over hers a few times.

Then the District Four escort came onstage, Fawn never cared to remember her name. Maybe it was rude but she avoided anything capital related unless forced upon it.

As the escort began to talk Fawn shifted into the place she always went in her head when she didn’t care to be present.

She sat up a bit more straight knowing the cameras would be on them and put on her fake smile.

But inside she was thinking of their house in the victors village they shared. The smell of the ocean and breeze flowing through their house as the sounds of the waves crashing on the rocks by the beach basically in their backyard.

The thought of Finnick spinning her in the kitchen as they waited for their freshly speared fish to finish cooking.

Just them in pure bliss, but she was pulled from her thoughts as a young girl no more than 15 walked up on stage.

Her hair was a deep dark brown almost black and she was taller, her face sort of flat as she wore a monotone expression on her face. Her mouth pulled straight and her eyes dark as she waited for someone to volunteer but no one did.

Fawn found this as a regular occurrence for every child reaped, a dead expression or hysterical tears.

Fawn had even had that herself the day she was reaped, she stood on stage.

Hot flashes ran over her body as she waited for someone to volunteer but of course it never happened.

Then they moved onto the boys, Fawns ears were ringing as she watched it all play out. Finnick pulled her impossibly closer, scooting his chair closer to hers, Fawn squeezed his hand tight.

Her hands were sweating as she heard a boys name be called and a very young boy comes on stage.

His hair was red and curly and he was too young to go into these games. Fawn felt her heart pounding, she couldn’t watch these kids die. She couldn’t tell if she just wanted time to freeze or to just get up and run and keep running till she physically couldn’t. She knew those both weren’t plausible ideas so she sat there and acted as if this was morally right.

As the kids were led into the justice building they made eye contact with her and Finnick. Finnick took her hand and followed going out back to where their car waited for them. She felt numb every step she took in the uncomfortable silver heels she didn’t feel, her hand wrapped around Finnicks was her anchor from flying away into the oblivion of Panem.

Finnick helped her into the car as they always took the mentors to the train first then the tributes after their last visits with their family.

Fawn just stared straight ahead as Finnick held her tight. They got out at the train station, Fawn tried her hardest to not trip over her heels.

As they got into the train she collapsed into a chair in the den area.

“Fawn look at me,” Finnick took both her hands as she moved herself to look at him.

“I’m sorry, I’m fine.” She blinked a few times trying to recompose herself. Finnick cupped her face gently and wiped away her tears with the pad of his thumb. Fawn was trying to keep herself pulled together, she had to mentor these kids for three weeks knowing damn well they won’t last more than two days in the arena.

Finnick was able to keep his composure far better than Fawn could. He had been in the capitol spotlight longer and constantly spoke for the press when Fawn couldn’t.

During an interview with Caesar Finnick would cover for her plenty.

“So I heard from a little birdy that there's an engagement that happened?” Caesar leaned towards Finnick and Fawn in his chair. They were engaged but never planned to marry, something about sealing it just would make things difficult. They just wanted something to hold each other together.

“Oh yes Caesar.” Finnick spoke up, he sat next to Fawn. He was in a blouse that was the same ocean green color as Fawns long dress. An elegant ball gown with gold embroidered flowers on the bottis of the dress. The dress showed plenty of her cleavage knowing god forbid they be in the spotlight without being exploited. Fawn sat close to Finnick, their hands intertwined, “Here Fawn, why don’t you show them your ring.” Finnick looked into her eyes and offered a reassuring smile.

“Oh please,” Caesar took her hand with her ring finger on it, “Get a close up of this.” The band of the gold plated ring had a trident wrapping around one side and a knife on the other holding the big green emerald together.

“Finnick just has a knack for beautiful jewelry, he gave me this necklace when I came home from my games.” Fawn pointed towards the seashell necklace with the ocean blue heart pendant in the center.

“Well that's certainly lovely, Finnick you must have really liked her.” Caesar began driving in the romantic talk.

“Well like we said at the end of her victory tour, Caesar we are in love with each other.” Finnick smiled at Fawn then looked at Caesar.

“It was just love at first sight really, when I actually got to know him I just knew I had to be with him forever.” Fawn put on her best smile for the capital pretending that she loved them and loved her life.

They sat there silently for a moment, Finnick holding Fawns' hands. Fawn studied his ocean green eyes as she once again imagined the house on the ocean.

Finnick joined her in her fantasy, Fawn standing on the back deck looking at the ocean. The water crashing against the rocks, the feeling of Finnick's arms wrapping around her waist. The strong grip he had on her waist, the heat radiating off his hands.

Fawn was pulled from her thoughts as Nava walked in followed by the two kids.

“And this is the capital train, your mentors.” She motioned to Fawn and Finnick, they met her gaze with their lips pulled straight. Not impressed by the capitol luxuries.

Fawn felt her heart begin to beat, she could feel it in her ears. She grabbed the arms of the chairs and pushed herself up. She felt weary as her vision tunneled, she began hurrying to her room. She couldn’t mentor these kids, they were so young.

“I’m sorry, I’ll go get her.” Finnick put on his most charming smile and followed Fawn to the bedroom car.

Finnick came into their room,

Fawn had to excuse herself for a moment.

Fawn sat on the bed kicking her heels off and pulling her knees up to her chest.

Children…that’s who they were mentoring, children and it made her sick.

She knew everyone in those ‘games’ were children and not all of them stood a chance but these two…

The ones they were mentoring didn’t stand a chance. She knows she should have more faith, more trust or confidence but she can’t….more like she couldn’t it hurt too much.

When she went into her games she was different from who she is now and she knows that. But one thing that pissed her off more than anything was what they made her do after she won those ‘games’ she hates doing it and she hate’s thinking that those kids could have the same fate her and Finnick did.

Fawn sat in the bed sobbing into herself, her head between her knees the dress getting dampened by her seemingly never ending flow of tears.

She didn’t bother to look up as the door opened and Finnick stepped in.

Finnick sat down next to Fawn, she didn’t need words. He needed to just be in her presence right now.

Finnick helped her untuck herself from her ball of tears.

“I’m not ready to go back out there, Fin.” Fawn sniffed, rubbing her eyes causing makeup to smear over her cheeks. Finnick nodded and held both of her hands and kissed over her knuckles.

“That’s okay, we can just stay here for a bit.” Finnick said softly, Fawn nodded and laid down in the bed Finnick lay behind her as they cuddled into each other.

He couldn’t blame Fawn for how she was feeling they had to mentor these kids, they were just kids.

Fawn broke her silence as tears began to fall from her eyes once again, “Did you see how young they are? Why do they have to do this…it’s not fair, Fin. I hate this, this shouldn’t be anyone's fate.” Fawn cried as Finnick pulled her body closer to his. He knew these kids had absolutely no chance at winning these games. They probably wouldn’t last more than a few days.

“I know darling,” Finnick moved her hair away and kissed behind her ear. Every year they dragged out the victors and forced two of them to mentor children to their deaths.

“Let's get you cleaned up, I can’t stand these clothes.” Finnick helped Fawn up, she sighed pulling her hair away from the zipper in the back of the dress. She turned and Finnick unzipped her and she slipped out of the dress.

They took a shower and dressed in matching forest green sweaters and black pants before joining the others in the den area. Finnick held her hand and went first as they walked in. The two children turned to look at the two, they looked her in the eyes. Fawn stopped and squeezed Finnicks hand tighter, suddenly she could see everyone she loved in those eyes.

“Marina and Beck, these are your mentors, Fawn and Finnick.” Nava smiled introducing them.

“Hello,” Finnick sat on the loveseat near them. Fawn stood frozen near the doorway still. She didn’t know what to do, just stand there? Go back to her room and drink?

“Ms. Fawn, are you okay?” Beck, the young boy asked, looking at her. His eyes are a glossy blue like the ocean on a sunny day.

“Yeah,” Fawn mustered up the best smile she could muster and walked over to the love seat sitting next to Finnick. She sat so close she could basically be sitting on his lap, she just needed to know that he was there. She needed her anchor to keep her present.

[lilblueprint]

Snow On The Beach

And it’s like snow on the beach

Weird but fucking beautiful

Flying in a dream, stars by the pocketful

You wanting me tonight, feels impossible

One night during a drug bust, you and Jason get high on each other.

TW: Jason uses guns (big surprise lol), mention of drugs, nightmares

Jason woke with a ragged gasp, tearing himself from the nightmare. It circled his head once before trotting off into the night. He searched for the source that had aroused him from his slumbers, realizing his communicator had gone off at his bedside.

“H’lo?”

“Littlewing–just got–report–Black Mask has–shipment coming in.” 

He winced at the crackles splitting Dick’s words and popping in his ears, shaking his hair out of his face. Tiny specks of light danced briefly before his eyes as he rolled out of bed, clicking the comm into his ear where it sat snugly. Gooseflesh erupted across his naked torso as he grabbed his helmet.

“When’s it comin’?” 

“Now!”

Well, that was one way to get him going.

-

Soon, Jason was watching Black Mask’s men slip from warehouse to ship, working in tandem to unload the illegal cargo. He could see crates being carried from the boat and experienced an unwelcome flashback to his dream. 

Catherine Todd, lying rigid in the bathroom of a dying house. White all around them as Jason cried and life came crashing down around him.

He growled, trying to push away the memory. Because one thing usually led to others, and he had so many dominoes waiting to fall. 

“Yeah, not gonna happen,” he breathed, robotic tinge creeping into his tone. 

He glared at the shadowy Gotham docks, watching the first crate coming closer and closer. And waited for the warehouse doors to betray their signature dragging creaks. 

Screech.

On cue, he vaulted over the edge of the roof, guns out and blazing. The first clip sank into the crates at the front, the shouts of men lifting his cover. He heard more footsteps echoing from the depths of the warehouse and slammed the doors back shut. They would be open again in a matter of seconds, but that was all he needed.

“Let’s get to it, boys.”

Shots rang out, the steady ratatatata of a clip quickly being overridden by the next like ocean waves crashing over one another. Crates fell and smashed, torn plastic and white powder peeking out from between splintered wooden slats. 

Jason ducked as a crate was thrown at his head, and it flew over him, crashing into the poor goon that had opened the doors. He went down, and more men streamed out around him, trying to surround Jason. Never one to back into corners, he retaliated by charging them point blank range. He continued pumping the trigger without hesitation, rubber bullets wouldn’t kill any of these men anytime soon. Not in his hands, at least. 

But they still served a purpose in subjugating these lowlifes, he mused. Delivering a final pistol-whip to the last man standing, he stepped over their unconscious forms to bag evidence. 

He toed at a crate with its side busted open, and shot it open for good measure as he crouched down to better observe the contents.

“Why’s it always cocaine, huh?” He muttered, tugging the plastic away to take a sample. Making sure not to leave a single grain clinging to his gloves. His head began to pulse dully the longer he stared at the substance. Jason scoffed and left the warehouse, trundling out towards the pier. His comm buzzed back to life as he tuned into Dick’s frequency.

“Hey, Littlewing.” Nightwing’s voice greeted him, the sound quality running much more smoothly than it had previously. “How’d the drug bust go?”

“Got it covered, Dickhead,” he grunted back.

“Aw, look who’s being grumpy. Is it because she’s not back yet?”

“Eh.”

“Hood, she just left yesterday. Gotham’s villains are in for a tough week if you’re already this mopey,” Dick teased. Then he wisely added, “Why don’t you call her?” before Jason could snap at him.

“I will,” Jason grumbled. He shot one last bullet, sending cocaine exploding across the concrete. Then he turned and grappled up.

-

Click.

“Hello?” 

Jason released a silent groan at your lovely voice, soft and undone. It must be late for you as well. He was on the roof again, well out of sight from anyone walking below. His mask was the only thing that covered his face, helmet resting in the space between his crossed legs. 

“Did I wake you, princess?” He asked quietly. 

“No, I was just about to go to bed. What’s up?” 

He hesitated, not wanting to burden you after your flight. You always complained about jet lag, though it was something he’d been hearing less of after Bruce had started letting you borrow his aircrafts.

“Nothin’ much. Just wanted to hear your voice,” he sighed. The glare of a lone streetlight shone on the drug-strewn ground below his dangling feet. The police would be here soon, but he wanted this post-patrol silence to last him a few more moments with you. “How was your flight?”

“It wasn’t great, but you know how it is. I still wish you were with me, though.” Your words made him want to curl into the phone, anything to hold you after a night of physical and mental exertion. 

“You should come back early,” he suggested, momentarily forgetting that you’d only just left the day before. He couldn’t help it–time spent apart from you felt elongated by nights spent in your absence.

“As much as I want to, I can’t, Jay.” He could almost hear your sad smile over the phone. “But I promise I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“Bring me something?”

“Is that all you were after?” You gasped in mock affontation. “Maybe I’ll have to extend the trip–”

“Please don’t,” Jason said hurriedly. You’d never spent so much time apart before, your rekindled relationship only having lasted a few months now. But it felt like there were eternal gaps in the timeline, and Jason couldn’t help but feel an ache in the spaces when you weren’t together. 

“What did you get up to tonight?” You asked, and he pulled out of his longing to answer. 

“Drug bust. Roman thought it was a good night for it, apparently.”

“You must be tired,” you replied sweetly. “Get some rest, Jay. For me.”

“Only if you do, too,” he insisted stubbornly. You rewarded him with a soft laugh, the sound tickling his ears.

“I will. Sleep well, my love.”

Silence settled in the night as his “I love you” faded into the air.

[bleuangel88]

"Christopher Briney perfectly executes the love-struck romantic male lead. Sure, he's in the early stages of pulling this off, but he still has that special something that makes you an instant believer...Conrad sneaks secret looks at Belly like she holds the secrets of the universe and the key to his heart.

Every sideways glance in the car elicits the butterflies, partly because we've spent so long seeing Belly fawning over Conrad that it's genuinely refreshing to see their love story through his eyes, even in stolen moments when the camera pans to his face. And Belly is typically none the wiser, making it all the more endearing.

These moments of fondness, affection, and love are solely for the audience most of the time, meaning that Briney does a lot of heavy lifting in those moments between dialogue. He especially nailed those moments during their winter fun at the beach house.

Conrad genuinely wanted to make a move or two at the fireplace; the moment was set, and the same happened outside when they were playing in the snow. But you could see the conflict of him being totally enraptured by Belly and not actually wanting to push her into something.

In that sense, it worked so incredibly well, especially in showcasing Belly's agency as a young woman, that she's the one who initiates things. She went from seemingly aloof to his overtures to flat making her own, letting him know she was ready to make love with him and share this special moment in a place they both loved.

And the love scene was absolutely beautiful. Conrad and Belly were in their own special world, and we were right there with them, almost enough to make you feel like you were imposing on this sweet yet life-altering moment of intimacy between them.

It was such an incredibly shot scene with the warm lighting, the two bathed in the warm light from the fireplace. Conrad focused exclusively on her eyes, reading the moment, her, and conveying his feelings where his tacitness trips him up before sliding down to the infinity necklace he gave her, and it was such an evocative moment.

I appreciated Belly's confidence at the moment, even though traditionally, she'd be seen as going into this with the lesser hand, the least sexually experienced teen girl who has obsessed over this boy for most of her life.

It was important to feel like she and Conrad were equals in that moment; both had everything to gain and just as much to lose with this moment of pure love, vulnerability, and trust."