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missing-aria-blog · 4 years

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“Invisible” Chapter 2: Stand in the Light

A year has passed since that night when your life changed forever. You fled the city of your birth and never looked back. You now lead a quiet life as a healer’s apprentice in a town far from your home. The prince of this region is a bit… odd, but his people were more or less happy and Prince Average had never met you so there was no chance he’d recognize you if you were to see him in the streets.

You lived in the attic above the shop that your teacher, Mistress Grey, ran. She hadn’t asked too many questions when you’d answered her help wanted sign. Your knowledge of herbs and slaves had been more than enough for her to take you on as an apprentice and the work suited you. You’d been getting on well enough that she largely left the general business of making remedies to you these days. Her daughter ran the shop below and was kind to you, even if she had no healing gift herself. She knew the stock and that was all that she really needed.

You step out onto the rooftop terrace where your herb garden thrives. Your assortment of healing herbs and flowers was probably half the reason your teacher had taken you on so easily. You smile as you trail your fingertips over the leaves and petals around you, each plant seeming to twine briefly around your hand as you pass over it. Pulses of joy and contentment at the morning sun’s rays filtered through their touch and into your mind. Good, you could enjoy your day off to its fullest.

Today was the last day of the local festival and your teacher had given you leave to enjoy the celebration. She was to depart the next morning to buy some of the rarer materials needed in the practice’s medicines, so you needed to enjoy the time off while you had it. She’d offered to bring you with her, but this particular trip would go a bit too close to your hometown for comfort.

Even in the short time you’d been with Mistress Grey you’d been able to travel all over the continent. She’d even taken you to the ocean! That had been a fun trip and she’d taught you all sorts of medicinal uses for various seaweeds. You’d miss her while she was gone this time. Her daughter, Marina, was your age though and was excellent company.

You left the terrace, closing the doors behind you before going to examine yourself in the mirror. Your hair was done up in a braided crown, silk flowers woven into it in hues of pink and white. Your green dress was well suited to the spring festivities and beautiful weather.

Taking your light cloak off of the hook by the door you make your way downstairs. Marina is packing jars of salves and pouches of dried herbs into a large basket, probably to bring out to the stall set up in front of the shop for the festival. She looks up and smiles at you as you peer into the basket.

“Are you sure you have enough for today?” you ask as you notice certain cures are looking a bit low, namely the hangover teas. Not surprising given the parties that went on during festivals.

Marina playfully rolls her eyes at you, “Yes of course! Mother is already working on packaging up what you two made yesterday. Go enjoy yourself. I saw the baker putting out some of those croissants you love so much. If you hurry you’ll catch them while they’re still warm.”

“Fine fine. But you will let me know if you need me, yes?” you pull a necklace out from the front of your dress. It’s a simple leather cord with what looks to be a plain white adder stone hanging from it. There was magic in the rock. If Marina or her mother activated their own stones it would let you know to return to the shop post haste. They’d been a pricey bit of magic, but completely necessary when emergency patients came through the door.

“You know I will,” Marina made a shooing gesture with her free hand, “Now leave before I tell mother that you need a whole WEEK off.”

You gasp in mock horror before giving her a quick hug and heading out the front door.

It was still a bit early and most of the stalls were only just finishing their set-ups, but the baker was already quite busy. Even so, he spotted you and waved you past the crowd, “I set one aside special for you my dear. You really helped me out of a bind with those herbs. I really thought we’d ordered enough but that boy must have counted our stock wrong.”

“Don’t be too harsh on him, he is your grandson after all,” you smile as you gratefully accept the offered croissant swirled with pink strawberry jelly, “He’ll get the hang of it.”

The baker sniffs but it’s obvious he isn’t actually mad about the situation. Just putting on a face, “Well, either way, keep me in mind if you ever have a surplus in the future. I don’t know how you grow such flavorful stock but you truly have a gift.” “I will! Thank you for the breakfast!” You wave and duck out of the way of the hungry crowd.

You munch on the pastry as you wander through the stalls, stopping here and there to browse and occasionally purchase items to be delivered to the shop later on. There are dancers, musicians, and other artists displaying their talents for everyone to witness and you stop here and there to watch and listen, your body swaying gently to the music.

As the day goes on the town square begins getting set up for the evening musical performances and the dance that will likely last until the wee hours of the morning. Multicolor paper lanterns are strung from cords above the square and lit with care. Vendors sell the springbell flowers that are the icon of this particular festival. It’s tradition to buy one to give to those you hold great affection for. A symbol of the hope that your bond will grow in the year to come. The flower is one that can sprout roots from its stem when tended with care, and it’s considered good luck if the flower you’re gifted with thrives under your care.

You stop at one of the carts, “Two please,” you reach into your belt pouch and pull out the required coins, handing them to the seller as she hands you back three of the blooms, “Oh, you gave me an extra one…” The woman shakes her head, “It’s the same price for three as it is for two. We had a good harvest this year. Thanks for that fertilizer by the way. It worked like magic!” “I’m glad! Let me know if you need more.” you carefully tuck the blooms away in a hardshell leather pouch, making sure the stems are properly wrapped before closing them up safely inside.

As you turn back towards the town square you hear shouting coming from one of the alleyways. Out of curiosity you make your way towards the sound. Whomever is making the noise is clearly moving away from the main street but you can still make out some words. ‘Hand it over’ stands out in particular. You hurry after the retreating sounds, reaching out with your inner magic to feel for the roots under the paving stones and the vines crawling up walls.

The alleyway makes a sharp turn behind a shop that’s closed for the festival, which would explain how no one else had noticed this happening in what was a mostly safe town. You press yourself against the wall before peeking around the corner. You see two men, clearly not locals, standing over something, or rather… someone. You can’t see whomever they’re harassing, but it clearly isn’t a friendly encounter.

“I can tell by your clothes that you’ve got money dwarf, so hand it over and we’ll let you go without TOO much damage.” the man’s companion chuckles darkly as he flips a knife in the air.

“Ah yes well, you see there’s the problem,” the responding voice is heavily accented, but speaks with a distinctly calm air. You aren’t sure if it’s confidence or stupidity, but either way you can’t stand idly by.

“Hey!” you shout as you step out from behind the corner. You can feel the magic in the earth below you responding to your anger. How dare these thugs try to ruin someone’s day like this! Your attention is locked on the two who whirl to face you, so you don’t really see who they were threatening before said person seems to blink out of existence. A fellow magic user? Well that would explain why he hadn’t seemed concerned. Of course that left you with two very tall, very buff thieves to deal with on your own.

They both narrow their eyes, then sly gins split their faces as they realize they’re dealing with a single, if a bit angry looking, girl.

“Well well, what do we have here?” the knife flipper takes a step towards you.

“You lost us our payday girlie…” the other growls, “You should have just kept going.” “Maybe so,” You can feel the roots under their feet pushing at the flagstones, “But maybe you two just picked the wrong town.”

You’re about to call the roots up to tangle their legs when a barrel lid comes flying out of nowhere, braining the knife guy upside the head. The other turns, confused, just in time for an invisible something to come crashing into his nose, causing blood to spray as it breaks. He sears as he looks around in a panic. His eyes land on you, “W-witch!”

You probably look just as confused as he does, “That wasn’t me...” You gather yourself and smile at the guy, “Looks like you’ve ticked off the town’s guardian spirit.” The lie rolls smoothly off of your tongue, you father was a master merchant after all. You knew your fair share of fast talking.

“G-guardian spirit? You’re lying!” he tries to help his dazed companion back to his feet with one arm while his other hand covers his bleeding nose.

“Well, I could be. But then, if I’m lying then you’re right and I’m a witch that you just pissed off,” you shrug, “Either way, I’d say you’re screwed.”

The man’s eyes widen, “You’ll regret this!” he drags his friend along with him as he flees into the surrounding woods.

“Doubtful,” you mutter as he disappears from sight. You send energy down the connected lifeforce of the woods, urging the very forest itself to trip up and otherwise hinder the thugs, lending credence to the claim of a ‘guardian spirit’. When you’re sure that they aren’t coming back you scan the alleyway, “Hello…?”

Silence greets you for a long while, then that accented voice answers you, “Merci mademoiselle, for the rescue.” ------------------------------------------------------ Fanfic “Invisible” is available to read on Wattpad https://www.wattpad.com/story/259956086-invisible-jack-x-reader

#red shoes #red shoes and the 7 dwarfs #red shoes and the seven dwarfs #jack #reader #jack x reader #romance #fanfic #fan fiction #story

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okaybutlikeimagine · 5 years

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You Don’t Mess Around With Jim

(where Billy has been living w/ Jim and El for a lil over a year bc he’s been adopted and he never died and he just knows Hopper is a pushover and knows how to use that to his and El’s advantage)

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It’s a calm and balmy night and the roads in Hawkins, Indiana are decently quiet. Billy likes it this way. Back before Hopper took him in, this was one of the few things that he felt made this town worth it: the quiet roads late at night.

The quiet can be suffocating. Billy’s thoughts thrive on the silence; they scream in its presence. Which is why quiet nights on quiet roads make for the perfect canvas for loud as fuck music and races with bad memories. It’s also why Billy got picked up by the local police department twice in his first week in Hawkins. But that’s why Billy met Jim. So he’s not about to lament that.

Billy was usually out later than this, considering it’s only 8pm, but even so, the streets are still quiet enough to be pleasant, especially for a nice summer night like this one. He has his arm out the open window, letting the humid air wrap around it softly as it cuts through the night. When he’s feeling playful, he likes to encourage El to follow his lead in sticking his head out the window as they drive.

But tonight is calm and warm and a little too humid to do something like that, so Billy settles for the softness of the air on his arm. He lets it touch him gently. He closes his eyes and breathes. The less than favorable thoughts of a home he no longer lives in flash through his brain in a second, and they’re gone just as fast. The night is nice.

He briefly thinks of Joyce and her boys and what a weird family they’re going to make when Jim finally realizes what a fool he’s being in not asking her to marry him right now. She’s gentle and nurturing to her children and she gives that same stuff to Billy and El, even though they’re in no way related and she absolutely doesn’t have to. And when Billy thinks about it, he isn’t too surprised about her showering El with affection, seeing as she may gain a daughter (or will adopt her whether Jim gets off his ass to pop the question or not). Plus, everyone loves El and decides to shower her with affection pretty much the moment they meet her. But giving all that gentle nurturing to another boy? To Billy?

It confuses him to say the least.

Anyway.

She’s constantly inviting them over for dinner. She lets them stay over sometimes when it gets late and El gets tired. She’s inviting and strong as all hell and is hard on Jim when he needs it. She puts up with Jim, even though Billy recently found out that they grew up in this damn town together. So that means she’s known Jim for decades and still puts up with him and if that isn’t a miracle in itself, Billy is going to eat his shirt.

But it’s not his job to babysit lovesick adults. He might make it his job if they get completely hopeless, but for right now, he’ll just appreciate the non-TV dinners and the soft, music-filled drives back and forth from the Byers home. Plus, Billy has a bet going with Jonathan about when Jim and Joyce get together and he needs to wait it out a bit longer if he’s gonna collect the reward.

Billy notices the sound of Jim’s fingers thumping against the wheel of the car as the next song begins to play.

~Uptown got its hustlers…~

Jim is mumbling along to the words, very clearly not sure of them, but when the chorus starts, he’s singing. Loudly. Not necessarily excited or anything, just loud.

“They all call big Jim boss… and they say you don’t tug on Superman’s cape. Y’don’t spit into the wind. Y’don’t pull the mask off that old lone ranger and you don’t mess around with Jim.”

He -would- like this song.

El is giggling in the back of the car and Billy eyes her before he looks back to the smile cracking Jim’s face.

“That’s pretty cocky.” Billy says, eyeing the man next to him and being an overall brat about it. He scoffs a bit when Jim turns humorously disbelieving eyes onto him.

Jim laughs as loud as he sings.

“That’s real rich coming from you.”

Billy laughs back at that. He knows it’s true, he’s not one to deny that he’s a cocky son of a bitch, but he shakes his head all the same. He wonders how he got here, listening to old music from the 70’s with the Chief of Police and a girl-raised-lab-rat in the back seat.

Jim looks over at Billy again and just asks: “What, do you think the song is wrong?”

There’s a challenge in his voice and Billy sees a matching challenge in his eyes.

Oh alright, old man. Game on.

Billy doesn’t know what’s running through his blood, but Billy has felt it boil up through the year he’s been living with Jim. He tried to push it down out of anxiety, but when he realized the safety of his new situation, it was a little hard to cool it off. Because getting under the skin of others is a borderline hobby for him. Will has his drawing, Jonathan has his photography, and Billy has his being an overall public menace. Some may say it’s not as “constructive”, but it’s a hell of a lot of fun. People are always telling kids to have fun while they’re young.

A shit eating grin splits Billy’s face and he looks out at his hand sticking out of the window and slicing the air. He hums to himself, alongside Jim as the song continues to play in the background.

“You know what I could use?” He asks, loud enough to make sure El can definitely hear him. “Some ice cream.”

He hears sudden and excited shuffling from the backseat and smiles even wider as he waves his hand around out the window.

“Ice cream?”

“No.” Comes Jim’s voice, firm and sharp. Billy looks in the car’s side mirror and sees El deflate in the back of the seat.

“Seriously, think about it.” Billy continues. “Ice cream on top of some Eggos?” El perks up again, her tongue licking her lips quickly in excitement. “Some of that good vanilla ice cream too, with the little black specks in it?”

He looks over to Jim, who is gripping the steering wheel tighter, knuckles turning white.

“I already said no.” He grumbles.

“Y’know, we didn’t get any ice cream the last time we went shopping.” Billy can hear the smirk in his own voice. He chuckles when Jim turns down the wrong road, closer to the store.

“Or the store trip before.” El pipes up from the back. Billy points to her and gives her a thumbs up.

“Good point. Plus we have some of those cherries at home that we can put on top.”

Billy can picture them on the center shelf of their cabinet: those maraschino ones in the little jars. El had pleaded for them the last time they went shopping, because they’re sweet and sticky and she likes to put them on top of waffles and inside her glasses of water sometimes when Jim isn’t home. Billy had helped her get them, reasoning that they were practically fruit, even though Billy knew that was bullshit. They’re a semblance of fruit, sure, but as much fruit as something bathing in the most unnatural looking syrup can be. Even so, Jim had folded pretty easily.

“Ooh, cherries!”

Jim shakes his head. He’s not humming anymore.

But now El is hitting Jim’s shoulder, her little hand rapping furiously on it as she goes in for the kill: “Please, Dad?”

Billy can’t help the chuckle that bubbles up in his chest as he hears it. He joins in.

“Yeah Dad, please?”

And every time Billy’s mouth forms around that word, it feels less and less like alcohol-infused cotton on his mouth. Sometimes Billy says it without thinking, like when Jim is trying to make them dinner and Billy asks if he needs help, or when Jim’s on the couch helping El read and Billy needs to know where something is in the cabinets, or that one time he needed Jim to hold something for him as he fixed his Camaro. It always catches both of them off guard when it comes out naturally like that. But Jim never makes a big deal out of it, he just lets it float away through the air between them as he responds to whatever Billy has asked him.

But sometimes… he uses it to his advantage. And it works like a charm.

Because Billy isn’t imagining it when the breath leaves Jim’s chest quickly and his knuckles get whiter.

“Fine.” He says under his breath as they take another wrong turn away from their house and towards the store.

El cheers a bit and sits back, pleased. Billy is just as pleased, leaning back and tuning in once again to the song as it ends.

You don’t mess around with Slim…

And this time, Billy is the one humming along to the end of the chorus. His grin doesn’t fade.

~~*~~

Jim Hopper can grumble as much as he wants, but Vanilla Bean ice cream on top of 2 warm Eggos with Maraschino cherries on top was a marvelous idea and Billy thinks he should be rewarded. And he knows Jim is happy because he’s smiling every now and then inbetween bites.

After Billy helps wash the dishes, he looks to Jim with a smirk on his face.

“Can’t mess around with Jim?” Billy asks.

But Jim just isn’t having it, tossing the towel he used to dry the dishes over to Billy.

“Go to bed, kid.”

“Yeah, yeah. Night, Dad.”

Billy doesn’t think as he says it, but his heart stops the second that it’s out there. He turns away as quick as he can, before he can see Jim’s face. His own face is burning and his heart is running as he walks to his room and shuts the door quickly.

~~*~~

“Hop!”

The sound of an irritated Joyce reaches Billy’s ears from his spot on the couch, sitting in between Hopper and Steve.

Joyce stopped by on her way to the store to ask them if they needed anything, and then to check their kitchen when they ultimately said no. Billy has noticed that she likes to do this. It’s completely unnecessary and most definitely just an excuse to come see Hopper, but it makes Hopper smile and provides Billy some entertainment as the two adults trip over each other, so he chuckles through it. Little does she know they just went to the store a night ago.

Steve is over because Billy really wanted to suck his dick.

And the nerds are also meeting at the Wheeler’s house and Steve was already planning on coming to pick El up because Billy doesn’t want to spend more money on gas. But after they drop them off, Billy and Steve are going down to the quarry so they can listen to music and Billy can suck Steve’s dick to the rhythm of a Springsteen song.

But for right now, they’re waiting for El to get ready and Joyce must have just found the 3 ice cream cartons they just recently bought.

Hopper looks over to her like a deer in headlights. There’s a laugh threatening Billy’s chest but he can’t let Joyce see it, so he turns his head to Steve and chuckles into his neck. Steve immediately starts to push Billy away while squirming and whining about being ticklish.

“Hop, can you come here?” Joyce’s voice is all business. She’s clearly not happy.

Billy is pretty sure she set a deal with Hop once they started getting serious to stop keeping so much junk food around. She knows Jim doesn’t make fresh food for them hardly ever. It’s always frozen dinners or fast food. It was probably just fine for the Chief when he was a mess living alone, but now he’s a mess living with two minors, so… frozen dinners every night don’t necessarily cut it. When Billy started living here, he quickly realized he’d have to be the one to make something for the 3 of them that wasn’t freezer burned peas on a tray, if not for him and Hop, then at least for El. No matter how content she seems, Billy still thinks she deserves more than only TV dinners and freezer waffles.

So since Joyce can’t be here every night (except she could if they’d get married), she cut some deal with Jim to limit the junk food in the house so she would know they’re not just living off sugar. They can’t die of some weird sugar overdose if there’s no sugar in the house.

Except...

“Why are there 3 cartons of ice cream in your freezer?” Joyce hisses at Jim. Billy can just hear it from his spot pressed against Steve. He fights hard not to snort, so he bites Steve’s shoulder instead.

“Hey!” Steve yelps, wriggling and trying to brush Billy off.

Billy shifts his eyes over to Hopper when he doesn’t hear the man say anything and notices the man flailing, mouth gaping like a fish as he struggles to bite out some words that might explain himself. It’s then that El walks into the room, a skip in her step and a bright smile on her face, showing she’s ready to go.

Billy gets up along with Steve to meet her at the door when he hears Jim reason with Joyce on a loud whisper.

“They called me dad.” He hisses.

The two kids glance at the adults, who are now looking back at them with wide eyes of shock.

Billy looks to El, sharing a glance of knowing mischief with her, before they give sweet, twin smiles to the adults in response.

A flustered blush begins to color both of the adults’ faces.

Billy gives El a victorious high five.

“Ready to go, kiddo?” Steve asks from behind Billy.

El nods, and waves to Hopper.

“Catch ya later, dad.”

As soon as the words are out in the air, Billy is frozen. Because those words didn’t come from El, who is currently opening the door and skipping out to Steve’s car.

“Hey, babe,” Steve starts, arm out to hold the door open for Billy. “When did you start calling Hop ‘dad’?”

Billy’s going to have a heart attack. He looks over to Jim, who looks like his face is seizing from trying so hard to force down his smile.

Goddamnit. Billy’s chest is too warm.

“Just get in the car, Harrington.” Billy mumbles under his breath, pushing his stupid boyfriend out the door and letting the air cool down his burning face.

(catch it on AO3 here!)

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hhhwcoaching · 3 years

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How A Holistic Health And Wellness Coach Can Save Your Life

Importance Of Health Habits

Life and health coaching overlap, so remember that life coaching is both a personal and a professional goal. Life coaches as well as a holistic health and Wellness coach do not focus on attaining higher physical achievement such as correcting a bad golf swing or helping you run a faster quarter mile — unlike sports. Instead, Life Coaches focus on issues that are representative of health coachings, such as teaching stress management tools and the importance of healthy habits such as diet, exercise, and sleep.

A study by the Chartered Institute of Personnel Development in 2009 discovered that 90% of the organizations surveyed used professional life coaches to help managers and other departments organize and set goals. Instead of adopting a unified approach, wellness and health training help clients develop personalized strategies to achieve their goals and improve overall understanding and related skills to help make those goals easier.

Boost Energy Levels

Some people seek health coaches to help them lose weight, while others aim to boost their energy levels or improve their heart health. In addition, some patients turn to health coaches to change habits or control chronic illnesses. Ultimately, health coaches help their clients implement what doctors recommend as changes to their diets and lifestyles, which in turn protects against major health problems.

The goal of health coaching is to empower a client to take responsibility for his or her health. The overarching goal of counseling with a coach is to give his clients clearly defined goals and guidelines so that they can use them to mobilize their inner determination for lasting, positive change. After their health improves, clients often find that working with a health coach sharpens their decision-making skills, and boosts their self-confidence.

A Holistic Perspective On Health

A holistic approach to health and well-being differentiates health and wellness coaches from other wellness experts and is part of what makes their work so valuable and effective. In contrast to other areas of health, wellness coaches refrain from acting as experts in the lives of their clients. Whether a nutritionist, nutritionist, or personal trainer, a wellness coach has the opportunity to offer their clients a holistic perspective on health that focuses not only on food but also on other areas of life that affect well-being, such as your job satisfaction, the quality of your relationships, how you feel about your home environment and what we call primary food.

If you fit into this category, it's time to think about becoming a certified wellness coach. There are many paths you can take to become a health and wellness coach, and the path you choose depends on several factors, such as your ultimate career goals, your budget, how much time you can devote to a health coaching program, and whether it requires a degree or provides you with a path to higher education.

Look At The Bigger Picture

Unlike doctors, health coaches do not diagnose patients with certain conditions. Instead, they are like trainers in other areas of your life, such as diet and eating habits. Holistic health coaches look at the bigger picture which means that eating can help clients with other issues like time management, anxiety, and stress.

While a nutritionist or nutritionist can put a client on a specific diet plan to treat a particular problem, the role of a health coach is to help you find the tools and skills needed to achieve your health goals. Health coaches who have a niche are working to balance their clients "personal lives in a way that responds to stress by classifying stressors and starting to work on reduction and management techniques.

Tools To Improve

It is helpful to imagine working with a certified wellness coach to become a responsible partner for your clients. As a health and wellness coach, you will look at your clients' health from a holistic perspective and help them address the individual components of their lives that prevent them from thriving and give them tools to improve. Connecting health coaching with a life coach Stress management is critical to achieve and maintain health and fitness goals as well as personal and professional goals.

If you are considering a career in health and wellness, ensure that you are doing it for the right reasons and helping others. Steps to becoming a health and wellness coach Now that you know what a holistic health coach is and what skills you need to become a health and wellness coach, you are ready to get going.

Variety Of Specific Therapeutic Techniques

Holistic health coaches focus on their clients' physical, emotional, and mental health to find long-term solutions that improve the overall quality of life in all aspects. In particular, holistic life coaching programs consist of a variety of specific therapeutic techniques and approaches developed by experienced therapists to provide an easy and efficient way to assist clients in seeking change in their lives. Some holistic wellness coaches even integrate other holistic healing methods such as Reiki, crystals, sound healing, and music.

To learn more about how a holistic health coach can save your life please visit https://www.hhhwcoaching.com

#holistic health and Wellness coach #Holistic health coaches #holistic coaching style #holistic nutrition health coach #what is a certified holistic health coach #certified holistic nutrition coach #life coach victoria bc #life coaching victoria bc #health coaching canada #health coaches in canada

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hardcore-evil-regal · 8 years

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Blades of Steel - Chapter 1

Blades of Steel

They Call Me the Cavalry (BadassNinja)

Summary: Melinda is a figure skater looking to earn herself a place on the Olympic team whilst completing her final year of college and managing her job as a barista. Phil is an insurance broker and a guy with a lack of luck in the relationship department. One failed date and one chance meeting is all it takes for their lives to change.

Notes: This story has been bouncing around in my brain for about a year now and I finally succumbed and wrote it. I have serious commitment issues because I really shouldn't be starting a new multi-chapter but what the hell! The more Philinda the merrier. Please enjoy :)

You can keep reading this here or on AO3 or FF.net

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1

Looking down at the text message on his screen he sighs heavily before glancing at the two tickets in his other hand. Bailed out on or stood up, it feels the same. It's the third time that his same date has been unable to actually show up for their date and he's getting sick of being left alone and awkward. He's not an idiot, he can take a hint. Clearly the woman is not interested in meeting him. Which is fine. Really, it is… He just wishes she'd be upfront about it and say it to him outright. Stop wasting both of their time. Checking his watch he's got about five minutes until the competition is about to start so he needs to decide what he's going to do. Is he going to go home and be the sad loner and hermit that he could be, or is he going to hand in his ticket and be a confident single heterosexual male with no self esteem issues whatsoever? What would Captain America do he asks himself seriously?

Stuffing one of the tickets into his pocket he walks up to the gate and passes his ticket to the guy there who scans the barcode before allowing him to enter. The tickets are for front row seats so he'll be damned if he's going to let them go to waste. Plus it's time that he started doing things for himself. Hurrying through to find his seat he can feel the chill of the air as well as the bubbling excitement of the crowd. Claiming his seat he sits forward eagerly as the lights dim and the competition begins. He's never been to an ice skating competition before but he finds himself enjoying it as he watches the skaters pull off moves that most people would only dream of being able to do. The crowd is mostly quiet as the music plays and the skaters perform their routines and it truly is an experience. Who would have thought that his non-date would turn out to be so exciting. The audience claps and cheers as the competitors make their entrances to perform after being announced but he notices how the crowd particularly erupts with applause and cries of excitement as one particular skater makes her entrance onto the ice. Melinda May. She's a beautiful young Chinese woman and he find himself in awe just as much as the rest of the audience. The way she moves on the ice is spectacular, flawless and with such grace and elegance he feels like the other girls don't stand a chance. There's more to it though he thinks as she quite literally flies past him, a small smirk playing at her lips as she moves in time to the music, a confidence and aura about her that just seems to draw people in. She's captivating and absolutely gorgeous and probably half the crowd is drooling over her. When she finishes her routine the crowd erupts once again in applause and he can feel the general atmosphere of disappointment as she skates off the rink and leaves them all with a dazzling smile. After she disappears the flowers and gifts from the crowd begin to hit the ice. Her gifts from the crowd are then collected up as they prepare the rink for the next competitor, but every performance after hers just doesn't compare in his eyes. Not even close. It's no surprise to anyone really when at the end of the day she is presented with the championship trophy, accepting it all with a gracious smile and short but sincere speech. The crowd is crazy for her and he doesn't blame them one bit. He can feel the sting in his cold hands as he claps loudly along with everyone else and he's grinning widely. Usually he's not really one to watch live sports other than the occasional basketball or baseball game, but this, he could get used to this.

-----------------------------------------------

The wind gusts heavily as she slams the door shut behind her before shrugging off her coat and removing her hat, gloves and scarf.

“Hey Mel!” Her friend and workmate Bobbi calls from where she's serving a customer at the till.

Bobbi is tall and blonde and stands out amongst the sea of people lined up at the counter. It's great when they ever go out to clubs because it's practically impossible to lose her friend in a crowd.

“Hey Bobbi,” she replies as she slips in behind the counter to go around to the back to stash her things and put on her apron.

Making sure her apron is tied snugly ready for her shift she walks back out to the front behind the counter over to the coffee machine and drinks station. On her way she says hello to Trip who's in the kitchen whistling away happily. She smiles as she reaches the drinks station where Hunter is wiping down the counter.

“I got this covered, you can clock off,” she tells him as she looks at the orders required and starts making the drinks.

“Thanks Mel,” he says wearily and she gives him a sympathetic smile.

“Go,” she says to him firmly as he lingers around a little, eyeing up the large crowd of people waiting for their orders making her roll her eyes.

“I can handle rush hour, now go!”

He throws her another thankful look before heading around to the back to drop of his apron and get his things before he leaves.

Moving through the familiar process of making up the drinks she thrives off the thrumming energy of the little coffee shop enjoying the frantic bustle a little and the fast paced environment. When rush hour is over though she does breathe a breath of relief as she can finally slow down and take a breather. Bobbi slides over to her as she serves the last waiting customer at the till and hands Melinda the order.

“So?” She asks with keen interest. “How did the competition go?”

A smirk tugs at Melinda’s lips as she pours the milk in with the coffee before answering Bobbi. Placing it at the front of the counter she passes it off to Natasha who works as a waitress there and is also their friend.

“It went well,” Melinda finally replies with a deliberately vague answer just to irritate her friend a little.

“Ugh! Mel!” Her friend groans punching her in the arm.

Unable to help herself Melinda lets out a short laugh at her friend's expense.

“What's going on?” Natasha asks as she brushes her short red hair back from her forehead leaning against the other side of the counter.

“Melinda’s being deliberately ambiguous,” Bobbi whines as Natasha and Melinda high five over her. “You guys suck!” She grumbles as Melinda bumps her hip against hers.

“Cheer up buttercup,” she says teasingly “don't worry. I won.”

The blonde's head shoots up at her word and she laughs at her stunned expression.

“You won!” She cries happily as she hugs Melinda almost picking her up of the ground since she is so tiny in comparison.

“I knew you could do it,” Natasha says with a proud smile on her face.

It's nothing new really, she's won lots of skating competitions over the years but winning this competition means that she now has the chance to earn a spot for the upcoming Winter Olympics.

“We need to celebrate,” Bobbi says squeezing her tightly before finally releasing her and placing her firmly back on her own two feet.

“Agreed,” Natasha confirms with a nod of her head. “Nine o'clock tonight at The Playground. My treat,” she winks at them before she is pulled away to clean up a freshly vacated table.

The Playground is an exclusive and high profile club that people line up for hours to get into. Knowing Natasha she probably knows someone who will let them in upon sight. Her theory is proven correct as they meet up and Natasha drags them over to the front of the line.

“God bless America,” she tells the man at the door who barely bats an eyelid at them before stamping their hands and allowing them in.

Melinda glances down at the little Captain America shield on the back of her hand as she follows her friends. The place is blaring with music and the dancefloor is packed. Heading over to the bar they order drinks before going over to claim themselves a table.

“Tony,” Natasha greets a suave looking man in a suit as he comes up to them.

“Ah, Natasha! Fancy seeing you here,” he smiles as the redhead.

“This is Tony Stark,” Natasha turns to her friends, “he owns this club.”

Both women look a little surprised as they turn towards the man who can’t possibly be more than thirty.

“Aren’t you going to introduce me to your lovely friends?” He asks winking at Melinda and Bobbi.

“Tony, this is Melinda and Bobbi,” she gestures to each of her friends in turn, “be nice.”

The glare she levels at him is half playful and half threatening though Tony seems completely unphased by it.

“A pleasure ladies,” he says smoothly as he kisses the back of each of their hands.

Melinda raises her eyebrows questioningly at her friend and Natasha just mouths ‘later’ at her over Tony’s head.

“What is the occasion for tonight?” He asks looking at them intently.

“We're celebrating,” Bobbi answers slinging an arm around Melinda’s shoulders.

“Melinda won Regionals for figure skating,” Natasha elaborates as Tony gives Melinda an appraising look.

“Well,” he claps his hands together, “since you are celebrating. All drinks for you ladies are on the house. Just tell my man Clint over at the bar that what happens in Budapest stays in Budapest.”

He grins as if not so secretly pleased with himself.

“You got a thing about code phrases huh?” Melinda asks him with an amused twist of her lips.

“Can't help myself,” he shrugs looking over his shoulder as someone calls out to me. “Well please enjoy yourselves tonight ladies, maybe I'll see you around,” he smiles before leaving them to go deal with the person calling out to him.

Both Bobbi and Melinda give Natasha curious looks as the walk over to the bar after finishing their first drink.

“I knew him back in school,” the redhead explains, “kept in touch so to speak, and so he considers me a friend.”

Her friends continue to look at her astounded.

“And being the friend of an incredibly rich Tony Stark means that I get some perks,” she adds with a cheeky smile.

They both raise an eyebrow at her as she plays it off cool.

“I’ll say,” Melinda mutters as they settle at the bar.

“Three shots please,” Natasha says to the barman ordering for the three of them.

He smiles at her with a look that clearly signs him as trouble as he whips a tea towel over his shoulder.

“Oh and… what happens in Budapest stays in Budapest,” she adds making it sound as if it were an afterthought.

A curious look from him is thrown at the three of them before he grabs a few shot glasses and a bottle of tequila.

“Comin’ right up,” he winks at Natasha.

“Oooh!” Both Bobbi and Melinda tease their friend.

“Flirting with the barman hey?” Bobbi grins at Natasha nudging her with her shoulder.

“You do know that we already have guaranteed free drinks for the night right?” Melinda asks her mock seriously.

“You guys are the worst wing women ever,” the red head deadpans dryly with a sour look at her friends either side of her.

“Trust me, you don’t need us as your wing women,” Bobbi says with a pointed look at her friend whilst the attractive blonde barman places their shots in front of them.”Melinda is the one that needs us as her wing women.”

The comment earns the blonde a grin from the grizzly red head and an indignant ‘hey’ from Melinda on the other side of Natasha.

“I don’t have a problem with guys,” Melinda states giving them both a false wounded expression.

“Pft, when was the last time you got laid?” Natasha looked at her with a tilt of her head looking far too smug for Melinda’s liking.

“I-”

“You’re always too busy,” Bobbi cuts in like she already knows what Melinda’s answer was going to be.

“Yeah, between training and work and doing your last year of college,” she pauses as if waiting for Melinda to deny that she’s right, “we know how hard you work and how hectic your life is. Which is why we should all let off a little steam tonight.”

Natasha places a hand on Melinda’s shoulder squeezing it gently in reassurance.

“We’re young, we’re supposed to have fun,” she smirks pushing a shot towards each of her friends on either side.

Rolling her eyes Melinda takes the shot with them, but inside she is touched that her friends actually care so much about her well being.

They do several more rounds of shots to loosen their inhibitions a bit before Natasha drags them all out onto the dancefloor. Clint watches them leave with an amused smile as he wipes down the bar and places a glass of scotch in front of his slightly downtrodden friend.

“Cheer up Phil,” he tells him, “I’m sure next time will be for real.”

His friend stares up at him in disbelief.

“Next time?” he raises an eyebrow, “Clint, she’s bailed out on me three times already. There isn’t going to be a next time.”

Clapping a hand on his friend’s shoulder Clint tries to be understanding. He’s never had such terrible lady troubles like his poor mate Phil, fella just can’t quite seem to catch a break.

“Hey, I’m sure there are plenty of great girls out there who would love to date you.” he says trying to make him feel better.

He’s not even lying though because Phil is a great guy, he just happens to have terrible luck when it comes to relationships.

“That’s easy for you to say,” his friend glances towards the dancefloor where the three young women from earlier had disappeared. “You don’t have any trouble with women.”

Clint can feel a slight flush creep up his neck at that, so his friend had seen him eying up the lovely redhead earlier.

“Just take a chance Phil,” Clint shrugs not really knowing what other sort of advice he could give to his friend. “You gotta risk it for the biscuit.”

He earns himself a strange look from his friend with that line, but it’s true. Phil is definitely not going to be winning any hearts if he keeps his sorry ass on that bar stool looking like a sad sack.

“Get out there,” Clint lifts his chin towards the dancefloor, “go find a nice girl or something.”

Phil raises his eyebrows at him.

“Something?” he questions.

“What?” his friend responds like he is being unreasonable, “you need to get laid mate.”

Phil sighs rubbing a hand over his eyes, he’s not really a one night stand sort of a guy but… it has been a while since he last… Yeah. So maybe Clint’s advice may not be as terrible, though he certainly should not be paying attention.

“Go!” Clint hits him with a tea towel tilting his head towards the dancefloor, “go!” he hits him again.

“Ah! I’m going” he waves an arm at his friend to stop his assault as he gets up from his seat.

Throwing one last dirty look at his all too smug friend, Phil disappears into the crowd of people on the dance floor.

The ground seems to shake with the vibrations of the music as everyone crowds the dance floor. It’s awkward as he tries to find his own rhythm and space away from rubbing up against a total stranger. Dancing on his own though doesn’t really make him feel any better, if anything it makes him feel worse seeing couples dancing together whilst he’s on his lonesome trying not to look like a weirdo. After a song or two he gives up and tries to make his escape from the dance floor, politely squishing through people grinding on one another. Trying not to touch anyone, he stumbles as a lady steps back into him as he passes and he trips towards the edge of the floor. His feet propel him forward as he struggles to keep his balance and he collides with another person much to his embarrassment. An endless stream of apologies flows from his lips as he rights himself and checks over the young woman to make sure that he didn’t cause her any serious harm.

“Are you alright?” he asks worriedly as his eyes quickly take stock of her body checking for any damage before drifting up to her face.

Suddenly his mouth is dry and he feels at a loss for words as he looks at her. She’s absolutely beautiful, breathtakingly so and he can’t help himself from staring.

“I’m fine,” she smiles at him and it lights up her face and his mind blanks for a moment.

“Uhh…” he can feel his cheeks reddening as he struggles to form intelligible words.

There is an amused sparkle in her warm brown eyes and her red painted lips are quirked up in a smirk. Still staring at her he feels like he’s seen her before.

“Can I buy you a drink?” he suddenly blurts out and can hear his heart pounding in his chest.

She smiles at him again as she nods her head in agreement, long dark hair with soft waves spilling over her shoulders.

“I’d like that,” she replies and he can feel relief surging through him.

They walk together over to the bar and he can’t help but feel like it’s all some sort of wonderful dream that he’s about to wake up from any minute now, Her steps are even and graceful beside him despite the fact that she is wearing heels and a tight little black dress. It’s a nice dress though, classy and stylish without being cheap. It’s simple, backless with a halter neck and tight skirt, nothing over the top or showy. He orders a scotch for himself and is surprised when she asks for the same thing. Not many girls he’s ever met have been into the same drinks he is. Clint serves them up their drinks with a not so subtle wink and Phil’s not quite sure what to do now. They both take a sip of their drinks and she smiles at him again when she catches him staring.

“Melinda,” she says tilting her head at him and it takes a minute for his brain to process what she’s saying.

Melinda… her name! Gosh yes.

“Phil,” replies trying to be smooth.

He doesn’t pull it off though and he can tell by the raise of her eyebrow,

“Uhh… sorry for crashing into you back there,” he rubs the back of his neck a little embarrassedly.

He’s making such a hash of this, he should just shut up and let her get on with her night. She lets out a soft laugh though and he feels his heart skip a beat at the sound.

“It’s fine,” she reassures him, “no harm no foul.”

“Oh thank God,” he says and realises he’s said it aloud when he hears the sound of her laughter again.

His eyes lift up to hers and for a moment he has the intense feeling of deja vu.

“I feel like I know you,” he tells her quite honestly and she raises her eyebrows at him in surprise.

She definitely has no recollection of ever meeting him. Watching as she tucks a piece of hair behind her ear it suddenly clicks into place and he knows exactly where he knows her from.

“Melinda May?” he asks and she looks at him surprised with a hint of wariness in her eyes as he says her full name without her telling him.

“How do you know?” she asks him a little suspicious.

He flushes when he realises how weird and creepy he must sound.

“I’m sorry,” he apologises for his strange behaviour, “I was at the figure skating regional championship on Saturday.”

“Oh…” she responds, quite honestly surprised that someone would recognise her from her figure skating.

“I saw you, you were amazing, by far the best,” he gushes and she can feel a slight blush creeping up her cheeks.

“Thank you,” she tells him, touched by his enthusiasm.

It's not often that somebody recognises her as a figure skater.

“You're a big figure skating fan?” She asks because clearly why else would he remember her.

He shakes his head no and that surprises her further. She doesn't really know what to say or how to respond other than with a soft ‘oh’ and an almost awkward silence falls over them as they both sip at their drinks. As he focused intently on his drink she takes the time to study him. His eyes are a soft blue and he has a firm muscled back which she can see by the way his shirt pulls taut over his broad shoulders. He is definitely attractive and maybe, just maybe… Her cheeks flush red as he turns towards her and catches her checking him out. She's worried he might've picked up on the path her thoughts were taking and she bites her bottom lip a little nervously. There is an adorable little half smile on his lips as he looks at her and he can't help his eyes from drifting to her lips as she nibbles at her bottom lip in the sexiest way. He can hear Clint in his head telling him to make the move, risk it for the biscuit or in this case the heart of the most beautiful woman he's ever met. Twenty seconds he says to himself, twenty seconds of insane courage is all he needs.

“Melinda would you like to go out to dinner with me sometime?” He finally asks, tension now coiling in his stomach as he awaits her answer.

Her tongue peeks out to wet her lips as she smiles at him eyes sparkling.

“I would like that very much,” she replies in a low voice.

Notes:

So that was a pretty long first chapter for me but I'm really excited about writing this AU. Please leave a comment and let me know what you thought or if you have any ideas or theories. I love hearing from you guys so please type me a little something. Comments are like sqee-worthy Philinda scenes without an LMD in the shot- long awaited and hard to come by.

#philinda #philinda fanfiction #phil coulson #melinda may #agents of shield #philinda network #philinda au #natasha romanoff #bobbi morse #clint barton #figure skating

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mastcomm · 5 years

Text

When a Critic Put on the ‘Best of All American Operas’

When I taught at Emerson College in Boston in the early 1980s, the school had a thriving musical theater division, but nothing approaching a traditional classical music department. Still, there were gifted singers among the students in my music theory classes, many of whom could barely read music when they arrived. There were also some fine voices in the college chorus that my colleague, the composer Scott Wheeler, directed.

I wanted to showcase these young singers in material that would challenge them. So Scott and I decided to put on an annual opera, choosing works that placed a premium on verbal clarity; in the great tradition of musical theater, these students were naturals at putting words first when they sang. We began with Monteverdi’s “The Coronation of Poppea,” which has long stretches of dramatically charged arioso — a quasi-melodic style that requires crisp delivery of the text. Trimmed and performed in English translation, this tale of sexual intrigue and ruthless ambition proved a great fit.

Our next choice was riskier but, we thought, potentially exciting: Virgil Thomson’s opera “The Mother of Us All,” with a libretto by Gertrude Stein. New Yorkers will soon have a rare opportunity to see this distinctive and timely work. As part of its celebration of the centennial of the 19th Amendment, which brought the vote to women, the New York Philharmonic is presenting a production of “Mother” with the Juilliard School and the Metropolitan Museum of Art, where four performances will take place, Feb. 8-14, at the Charles Engelhard Court in the museum’s American Wing.

The critic Andrew Porter once wrote that when listening to “Mother,” he was tempted to consider it the “best of all American operas”; on “calm reflection,” he added, he would “hardly modify that beyond ‘one of the three best.’” Still, at Emerson, it took some persuasion to sell this idiosyncratic opera to the students.

They immediately responded to the spirit of the piece, which is a wonderfully nonsensical yet affecting pageant of American history, centering on the suffragist Susan B. Anthony. The opera offers a parade mixing fictional and historical characters, many of whom lived in different eras but come together here to mingle and squabble, to search for romance and campaign for justice. We first meet Anthony at home with her loyal companion, called Anne, but also see her in action crusading for women’s rights and debating patronizing male politicians. We meet Daniel Webster and Andrew Johnson, Ulysses S. Grant and the actress Lillian Russell.

Some characters are based on friends of Stein’s, such as Jo the Loiterer — here a discharged Civil War veteran but also a veiled portrait of Stein’s young friend Joseph Barry, an American soldier during World War II who became a journalist based in Paris. Characters named Virgil T. and Gertrude S. serve as charming hosts and commentators on the action as it takes place.

Our students also responded well to Thomson’s music, which suggests concert bands playing waltzes in parks; military marches; church organs; parlor songs; schoolyard ditties; and bursts of flinty harmonies in moments of intensity — all folded into a score in which the goal is to make Stein’s often illogical, playfully poetic words come through clearly. Thomson was a master of the art of writing vocal lines that matched the rhythmic inflections of the words, the sound and syntax of the phrases. My colleague Scott, who had studied prosody with Thomson, brought practical know-how to his coaching of the students.

The opera was inspired by Thomson and Stein’s love for the oratory of the United States in the 19th-century, when politicians made grandiloquent, soaring speeches and public debates went on for hours before rapt crowds. But I worried that our students would resist a text full of strange lines like “How, how when men are men, can they be mixed?” and “Quilts are not crazy, they are kind.”

It turned out, though, that my Emerson students were then listening to songs by the B-52’s with lyrics like “Why don’t you dance with me? I’m not no Limburger.” They relished Stein’s unabashed obscurities.

But as we began rehearsals, the committed actors among the cast had anxious questions: Who were these characters they were playing? What were their motivations? Scott and I tried to get them to trust in the words and the music, to let the meanings and implications take care of themselves.

And, as we showed them, whole swaths of Stein’s text made sense. (Sort of.) In the debate scene between Susan B. and Daniel Webster — who snidely refers to his adversary as “he” — Susan sings, “I understand that you undertake to overthrow my undertaking.” Daniel answers the “honorable member” that “he” is greatly mistaken and is “dealing with one of whose temper and character he has yet much to learn.” What could be more logical?

In another wonderful scene, for which we had two endearing student singers, we see John Adams (probably meant to be John Quincy Adams) courting Constance Fletcher, a gracious woman from the early 20th century.

Thomson reclaims the dated genre of the love duet for lyric tenor and soprano. Adams keeps shifting between outpourings of lyrical bliss (“Dear Miss Constance Fletcher, it is a great pleasure that I kneel at your feet”) and agitated protestations of his inability to do so (“But I am an Adams, I kneel at the feet of none, not anyone.”

Soon, in utterly serious choral declamations, all the other characters, who have been watching the couple, express resignation over what might have been had he not been an Adams — that “he would have kissed one of her hands, and then still kneeling, he would have kissed both of her hands still kneeling,” and so on. We convinced the students that the more straightforwardly and earnestly they performed this scene, the most charming and poignant it would be. They nailed it.

Scott and I kept Virgil (as we both called him by then) abreast of our progress through phone calls and visits to his apartment at the Chelsea Hotel in New York. He didn’t show up in Boston until the final two rehearsals in the church space that we rented to prepare for the three-performance run in February 1981, conducted by Scott. Instead of contracting an orchestra, we used an arrangement of the score that Virgil had made years earlier for piano doubling on harmonium (me), trumpet and percussion. The sound of this intimate instrumental ensemble nicely matched the voices of our cast, which sounded like the choirs Virgil had grown up with in Kansas City, Mo.

Virgil was 84 at the time, and his hearing was impaired. During the dress rehearsal, he sat in the front row and listened intently, mouthing every word from memory as the singers performed his beloved opera. It took him time to adjust to the staging, which was overly theatrical for his taste. He thought our Virgil T. and Gertrude S. were too involved with the other characters. “You’re not in the show, you know!” he shouted at them at one point. The students looked shaken. But before long, Virgil grasped our director’s concept and loved the interplay among the young performers.

He told us that he was thrilled that Stein’s words came leaping off the stage. The singers might not have sounded operatic. But, as the Boston Globe critic Richard Dyer wrote in his review, they made “every word a palpable presence, which is something you can’t say about most conservatory opera performances.”

The opera’s second act begins with a scene showing Anne at home with Susan, using an old-fashioned carpet sweeper. In the break before, Virgil sat at the piano and showed me how he liked the series of short, ascending arpeggios in the left hand to sound: played dry, each with a gentle upward lift, to suggest the motions of the device. “I love my carpet sweeper music,” he said. After the rehearsal was over, he complimented the elated cast and singled out moments he had found especially touching.

On opening night, many in the audience could not help noticing that soon after the opera began, its composer, seated in a middle row on the aisle, seemed to fall asleep. But Virgil’s direct creative involvement with the performance had happened already, during the rehearsal. His attendance at the opening was only a gesture of support.

During intermission, he came up to Scott and me and said: “Well, everything’s going just beautifully. If anything had gone wrong, I’d have woken right up.”

We couldn’t have asked for a better compliment.

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shirlleycoyle · 5 years

Text

Who Kept Buying the Mac Pro Everyone Hated?

More than half a decade ago, one of Apple’s most controversial computers came to life, molded out of aluminum into a striking, hard-to-ignore cylindrical design.

“Can’t innovate no more, my ass,” Apple senior vice president of marketing Phil Schiller famously said as he was introducing the computer at the 2013 Worldwide Developers Conference. At the time, Schiller’s comment was seen as a bold return to the high-end market—think artists, videographers, developers, 3D renderers, and music producers—that had stood behind Apple during its fallow years but seemed to be getting ignored amid its growing phone and tablet markets.

But now we’re well into 2019, just about six years after Schiller made the comment, and long after the line had fallen into self-parody. For six years, we’ve been living with a device that its target audience seemingly couldn’t stand. Now those users are getting a machine that actually lives up to this line in the form of the 2019 Mac Pro, which is out this fall for an eye-watering starting price of $5,999, along with a 6K monitor that has a $4,999 starting price.

The 2013 Mac Pro was also seen as extremely expensive when it first came out at $4,000. (You can still buy one today, starting price $2,999, despite the WWDC announcement.)

But that machine came with so many perceived failings from an upgradability standpoint that it’s worth pondering what it represented about Apple. What was once seen as a symbol of Apple’s continued dedication to its pro-user audience is now seen as a symbol of how much the company had abandoned them. This week’s WWDC announcement is an attempt to win those creatives back with a design (and upgradability approach) that evoked the good old days. You want pro hardware at a pro cost? You got it.

As for the trash can, these machines are still floating out there. They’ve been on the market for more than half a decade. Clearly, someone is buying them … right?

You wouldn’t think so if you read comments online. Generally, the party line about the 2013 Mac Pro, both from pro users and on Mac enthusiast websites, is that the machine is a failure. This has led to recommendations to stick with either the 2012 Mac Pro, with its roomy and upgradeable design that reminds many of a cheese grater; its 2009 counterpart, whose BIOS can be flashed to be roughly compatible with the 2012 model; or a Hackintosh, which allows the level of upgradability that the 2013 model replaced with a bunch of Thunderbolt 2 ports.

The 2013 Mac Pro has such a bad reputation that users have been willing to go with the prior iteration—a device that’s bigger than a breadbox and doesn’t even support USB 3.0 ports, let alone the USB-C ports that Apple has made a centerpiece of most of its Mac revisions since 2016. Ask the right folks, and you might hear stories of corporate or education buyers who waited to upgrade their workstations, saw the Schiller speech, and responded by buying as many “cheese grater” Macs as they could get their hands on, scared off by what they saw as a limited design and frustrated that Apple didn’t make it available in time to work within their yearly budget.

Those buyers have a point. Objectively, the machine was quickly outclassed by competitors. The 2013 Mac Pro’s Achilles’ heel was graphics capabilities, which predicted a future in which dual-GPU structures would become common. They didn’t. Instead, single GPUs just kept getting more powerful.

At first, the trash can received a positive response. An Apple Insider review from early 2014 explained its appeal like this: “Taken as a whole, the new Mac Pro’s design is one of Apple’s best case studies in form following function.” Other reviews from the period were glowing.

As the years moved on and the upgrades failed to surface, however, that reputation changed dramatically. Its dual-GPU structure quickly proved to be a bad bet and its “thermal corner” locked the company into a limited design that scared off enthusiasts and high-end business consumers alike. Those Thunderbolt 2 ports could not replace all the missing drive bays and PCI slots which, for all the size they added, prevented your desk from becoming a mess of cables, cords, and boxes.

But despite all the negative blowback about this machine, there is still a thriving market of people who buy the trash can Mac Pro in 2019. I found these people in the server room and in the used computer market.

Scaling the Mac Pro

There’s a pretty good chance that the 2013 Mac Pro might have remained a viable product thanks in no small part to a single company that has proven effective at converting the Mac to a server environment.

That company, MacStadium, has been buying Mac Pros at a scale that most people and many businesses couldn’t fathom. And the reason has everything to do with the growth of Apple’s own app ecosystem.

Years ago, the cloud virtualization company had a business built around people who would rent out virtual access to a small number of machines, generally running the Mac Mini architecture. (Apple hasn’t sold a dedicated server product since the Xserve was discontinued in 2011, but the new Mac Pro will come in a rack-mountable variant.)

But when it started offering that service—generally intended for remote access needs—something surprising happened.

“We started with Mac Mini. Most of our customers would have one or two. And then we started getting phone calls from folks who would want 50,” Shawn Lankton, MacStadium’s Chief Revenue Officer, said in a phone interview. “And we said OK, this is a huge order for us. Years and years ago, we had employees driving around to all Apple stores in the Southeast to buy enough Minis to fill that order. And then they’d call back and they said, ‘Okay, now this is working great, we’d like 400.’”

It became clear that, despite not being designed for a server environment, there was demand for a company to sell virtualized Macs that can scale up in the same ways that Linux or Windows servers can. And in the years since, MacStadium has built much of its own architecture to maximize the reach of this gear, including patented server-centric mounting hardware.

And the 2013 Mac Pro, being far smaller than the computer it replaced and therefore easier to fit in a server rack, played into the interests of MacStadium and some of its big-name users, including the email firm Litmus and the software-testing platform Travis CI. Both of these companies make tools that require access to a lot of machines at once for testing purposes—Litmus for presenting examples of how an email message shows up in Mac-based web browsers or email clients, Travis CI for compilation needs. MacStadium’s tools allow these firms and others to access dozens or even hundreds of machines on demand, at scale.

The most surprising part about the Mac Pro in the server room? It’s actually an even better fit in server architectures than the Mac Mini was. The machine’s six Thunderbolt 2 ports, which workstation users came to dislike, proved the perfect vessel for combining hundreds of machines and running them at scale. The numerous IO ports, when used together, allow MacStadium to create a cluster of machines that can talk to one another and work in tandem.

MacStadium says it buys hundreds of Mac Pros a month, even in 2019 as the platform grows increasingly out of date. The demand among developers who have to compile a lot of code for their iOS apps is just that high.

“Long term, it didn’t work the way that Apple had hoped it would, that you could build around the Mac Pro,” MacStadium’s vice president, Brian Stucki, said. “But what was interesting for us is that IO is what makes us possible … We use those ports in so many ways to really make this a data center.”

Certainly, MacStadium is more experimental than the average cloud server firm (last year, it started selling virtualized iMac Pros, despite the fact their high-quality screens are basically useless in that environment), but it’s clear when a fit is a fit.

The very things that made the 2013 Mac Pro a bad bet for its intended consumer base of workstation users—the decision to offload upgradability externally and the dead-end proprietary graphics setup—made it perfect for the server room, where these things were more important and less important, respectively. Heck, it even has hardware, including Xeon processors and ECC (error-correcting code) memory, more commonly used in server rooms than on desktops.

Really, the only thing that could make the Mac Pro better for MacStadium is if they were cheaper—as the firm generally buys its machines new, which means the company has a fairly close relationship with Apple.

“The sales department, of course, loves that we’re still buying so many hundreds of Mac Pros,” Lankton said.

That buying strategy is likely to continue. In response to the WWDC announcement, Lankton added that the company was excited to see a rack mount option in the 2019 update, and said the new machine likely will also be a good fit for MacStadium’s customers and high-end creatives, even if it’s overkill for individual developers, who he says might be better off with the Mac Mini.

“We’ll keep a close eye on Apple as we approach the ‘late fall’ release date; however, we’ve already had several customers voicing their interest in testing with the new machine ASAP,” he said in an email.

Of course, when it comes to the 2013 model, not everyone is buying these things new.

The Second-Hand Consumer

As any tech fan can tell you, often the biggest surprises can be uncovered on the used market.

And the 2013 Mac Pro is already showing signs that it could find a new role: That of a potential bargain, given its specs. On eBay, you can currently find a 6-core Mac Pro with Dual AMD FirePro D500 GPUs selling for as low as $1,500—half the price it’s selling for on Apple’s own website, and $1,000 less than the same machine sells for refurbished.

And if you look long enough, you can find a 4-core model, which Apple stopped selling in 2017, for even less.

Last fall, Peter von Panda, a YouTuber who specializes in product reviews of offbeat items such as an electric chainsaw, an Eagle Scout folding knife, and a bluetooth karaoke speaker, figured this out on his own. He admits to being interested in technology, though perhaps not as familiar with the ins and outs of specs as someone who might build their own computer. His videos reflect the work of a guy with a diverse set of hobbies.

But last fall, he had something of a hit—because he touched a nerve among Mac fans by arguing that, for his needs, that a 2013 Mac Pro made more sense than a 2018 Mac Mini.

His case was built around a simple fact: When he went to Apple’s online store to buy the Mac Mini, he felt a severe sense of sticker shock from the $1,899 price tag of his preferred configuration and the steep cost of additional SSD storage.

“I was a bit shocked at how expensive it got,” he told Motherboard. “But what I was really shocked at was that I could not add some of the hardware features that were the things that I really wanted.”

His view on the issue was a bit controversial for a few reasons: The 4-core Xeon E5–1620 v2 on the low-end Mac Pro, which can technically be upgraded, is objectively less beefy than the Core i5–8500B sold in the Mac Mini he priced out. And the Mac Mini’s SSD is both speedier and more secure, thanks to the T2 chip.

Nonetheless, he wasn’t a fan of having to pull apart the entire machine to upgrade the RAM on the Mac Mini, and he felt external upgradability (think external GPUs) wasn’t going to be worth it. Plus, the graphics in the Mac Pro, despite their age, are still better than the integrated graphics of the Mac Mini.

Months later, he says he’s still pretty happy with his decision—noting his appreciation of its smaller footprint and aesthetic features. “There’s a lot of small luxuries on it that I wasn’t expecting that weren’t deal-makers for me,” he added.

(As a video guy, he does note that it’s only just fast enough to handle 4K video in 2019, and might not survive later video-quality upgrades.)

So, clearly, it works for Peter—but does it even make sense for anyone else? I asked Luke Miani, a YouTuber who specializes in finding deals on older, mostly Mac-based hardware (he recently bought a 2013 Mac Pro), to weigh in on the machine’s value. He was a bit more skeptical.

While Miani agrees the 2013 Mac Pro has some things going for it as an alternative to the 2018 Mac Mini, he notes that the trash can has limitations, and strategic buying (say, buying a minimally-specced i7 and expanding it via the machine’s Thunderbolt 3 ports) could help users maximize the Mac Mini’s value.

“I’m sure the new Mac Pro will have a market, but the 2013 at any price point has too many issues and competitors to overcome its benefits,” he explained. “Even at a lower price point, the Mac Pro will face competition from the Mac Mini and 5K iMac, both of which I think are a better value.”

He notes that the 2012 Mac Pro remains more upgradeable, while the sweet spot in the market, at least at the moment, is the 27-inch 5K iMac, which is well-specced, fairly upgradeable, and can be found for around $1,500.

Imagining the Future of the Past

Right now, it may not be a great value, but if the 2013 Mac Pro gains a secondary fan base after being taken off the market, it won’t be the first time that’s happened with an Apple machine.

Apple’s history is full of computers that failed in their original contexts but gained popularity for their hackability on the secondary market. Two particularly well-known examples of this involve the Color Classic, an incredibly cute but underpowered machine that was heavily modified by ’90s-era Mac fans to support higher-end components, and the G4 Cube, which saw a significant aftermarket of upgrades years after the device was famously removed from the market in 2001.

And certainly, the 2012 Mac Pro, which has maintained its value on the used market despite its age and outdated port selections, fits in that category.

There’s reason to think that the 2013 Mac Pro could gain a second life among collectors: They’re relatively small, fairly beastly given the size (its highest-end supported processor, an Intel Xeon E5–2697 v2, has better multicore performance than the widely used i7–8700K, and the 8-core E5–2667 v2 performs respectably compared to the 8700K despite costing roughly half the price used), and there’s still plenty that can be upgraded in the machines if you’re willing to take the leap.

And since many of these machines were used in server environments, it’s likely that there’s going to be a flood of old trash can Macs on the used market in a few years as later machines outpace it—meaning its price tag could drop like a rock on eBay in a short amount of time.

There are other things that work in its favor as well: Mac Pros support the same kind of DDR3 ECC memory that was widely used in servers just a few years ago—which means that you can max out the RAM on the machine for as little as $200.

But the upgrade process won’t be easy. In 2014, the tech company Other World Computing released a video that described the process of upgrading the 2013 Mac Pro, which is shockingly complex, requiring multiple types of screwdrivers, the disassembly of numerous pieces of silicon, and a very specific set of instructions. Really, the most shocking part of the whole situation is the fact that the chip can be upgraded at all.

In a phone interview, OWC’s head of product marketing, AJ Gerth, admitted that Apple’s moves away from upgradability have led to some changes in strategy, including the addition of products (such as external GPUs and enterprise storage solutions) whose value isn’t limited to the Mac market. “We embraced a lot of other areas before Apple moved to less upgradeable devices,” he said.

Gerth noted that many of his buyers are business customers, who have different needs from individual users. He doesn’t see the 2013 Mac Pros maintaining their value in the way the 2012 and earlier models did.

“I don’t think from an individual workstation standpoint, it will have longevity that the previous generation of Mac Pros had,” he said.

Expect Prices to Fall

Right now, it’s arguable that, even on the used market, the 2013 Mac Pro is severely overvalued, and a case-in-point can be found sitting under my own desk.

Recently, I bought an old Xeon workstation made by HP with the goal of, over time, maxing it out on the cheap. There are some hardware quirks, but because it’s a desktop based on server gear, it benefits from used-market arbitrage.

It doesn’t look as nice or have the same port selection, but it’s effectively the kind of machine Apple would have made had it stayed with the same general chassis tower approach that it used on the first-generation Mac Pro. It uses the same processor line as the 2013 Mac Pro, along with the same RAM. Both can be upgraded to levels comparable to high-end consumer PCs relatively inexpensively. Just as Apple’s Craig Federighi compared the 2019 Mac Pro to a high-end HP workstation on stage this week, the Z420 is directly comparable to the 2013 Mac Mini. When this machine came out, it was within the ballpark of the 2013 Mac Pro’s current $2,999 price tag.

But old workstations like this simply do not maintain their value. I got mine for a steal at $50; they generally sell for $120 or so on eBay. Even with a few upgrades (including 64 gigs of RAM, a processor upgrade, and a graphics-card upgrade to a lower-end AMD Radeon RX 570, which outperforms the trash can’s FirePro graphics cards handily), the result is still hundreds cheaper than a used 2013 Mac Pro with otherwise comparable specs.

This isn’t a surprise if you’re at all familiar with how the used market works. But the 2013 Mac Pro, based on a vision of how professionals work and what businesses want that appears to have little real basis in reality, has remained more expensive than its peers because it hasn’t seen a single upgrade in years. It’s likely buoyed the prices of its predecessors, too.

Now, with a new generation of Mac Pros, as well as machines like iMacs and Mac Minis that hit different market segments that might not need such horsepower, there’s nothing there to help it keep its value, other than the Apple name and ecosystem. When the new model hits the Apple Store, as video production shops and server farms look for an upgrade, expect its price to fall—fast.

And if it does fall, expect these machines to find interest in markets that would have previously ignored them.

OWC’s Gerth suggested that it could make an impressive media server if its price fell far enough. And Miani, the used Mac enthusiast, admits that the system, for all its weaknesses, has a certain charm that could make it worth buying down the road. At the end of a recent YouTube video in which he said he planned to resell the machine, he really put its appeal best.

“In a couple of years, when these things become a lot less expensive, I’m going to buy one just because it’s such a beautiful piece of design,” he said.

Even with all its flaws, that beauty still stands out.

Who Kept Buying the Mac Pro Everyone Hated? syndicated from https://triviaqaweb.wordpress.com/feed/

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the-record-columns · 7 years

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Oct. 4, 2017: Columns

Come to the fair...

By KEN WELBORN

Record Publisher

Once again we are blessed here in Wilkes to have a busy week of entertainment for the entire family.

The Wilkes Agricultural Fair, which is sponsored by the Rotary Club of North Wilkesboro, is going on all this week at the Rotary Fairgrounds off West D Street in North Wilkesboro. There are more than 25 rides on the midway along with plenty of good food and fun games. It truly is a family event with an amazing array of 4-H exhibits, a wide variety of entertainment, and even a hay bale decorating contest. Really, you have no idea how cool a big round hay bale can look! Also, children can enter the N. C. Department of Agriculture Scavenger Hunt to win a bicycle or a smart tablet computer.

The fair opens each weekday at 5 pm and Saturday at 1 pm. An added attraction n Saturday is the last Lawn Mower Race of the season. Gates open at 2pm, practice begins at 4:30 pm, and racing begins at 6 pm. An admission to the fairgrounds includes admission to the Lawn Mower Race as well.

If you are reading this piece on Wednesday morning, it is about the time that the Rotarians are enjoying their highlight of the fair. Because it is on Wednesday each year that the gates are opened at 10:00 am for what has become the most anticipated event of the year—for both Rotarians and their very special guests--the Exceptional Children and Adults from throughout the county. The parking area of the fairgrounds is literally covered with buses and vans, and the squeals and laughter can be heard across the midway.

The carnival's operator, Bill and Donna Inners of Inners Shows, open up their rides to these very special folks, and the other vendors and acts do the same. These include the E-Z Ride Petting Zoo, NoJoe's Clown Circus, and the ever popular music of Buffalo Barfield and his wife, the lovely Bumadean. To top it all off, there will probably be some of the N. E. W. Extreme Wrestling stars roaming the fairgrounds in full costume, posing for pictures and doing their part to make this very special event even more fun.

While all the Rotary guests and their caregivers are being entertained on the midway, a group of Rotarians, aided by our friends at the Brushy Mountain Smokehouse and Creamery in North Wilkesboro, will be preparing to serve lunch to nearly 600 people. This is no small undertaking, but is cheerfully accomplished by a small army of members, spouses, and other volunteers who always show up to work for this special project. Believe it or not, 600 people will be served hamburgers and hotdogs, with all the trimmings, along with a cookie and a cold drink in 45 minutes or less.

Just to watch the interactions between these children and adults and their caregivers is a blessing in an of itself. It is not uncommon to see tears in the eyes of the people serving the food as they watch the line move along in front of them as everyone prepares to enjoy their lunch and enjoy even more entertainment.

The dedicated people who take care of this myriad variety of special needs children and adults tell us that they look forward to their day at the fair almost like another Christmas.

I know the Rotarians do.

One year it rained every day except for the five hours of the Wednesday Exceptional Children time. Over and over I heard it said,, if that had to be the only clear weather for the week, that was fine with them. One of our past presidents, Tim York, put it best when he said, “Wednesday's special day for the children at the fair is the only Rotary project we never have to send around a sign up sheet for--they just come.”

They get to ride, they get to laugh, they get to see their friends, and they get to enjoy a great picnic lunch; all the while surrounded by people who love and care about them. Clearly, on this day these special children and adults are the rule, not the exception.

And, Rotarians are all the better for it.

Trust

By LAURA WELBORN

Sometimes it seems that life is just about surviving, but after listening to Rev. Anne Dieterle this Sunday I was reminded of the words my mother used to say: “We can’t do everything but we can do something.”

Anne talked about going beyond survival and adding beauty and joy through play and creativity. If God is in our lives and we really believe that then we must live like we trust we will not just survive but thrive. I find myself living like a functional atheist- I want to trust and to believe yet I work like I don’t believe things will be ok. What we do every day defines us so we need to be intentional in our actions and act like we mean it…

1. It is about showing up every day with the intention to be your best self, and to do the best you know how, without expecting life to go a certain way. Focus on what matters—what moves you forward today—and let go of what does not.

2. Most of us don’t want to be uncomfortable, so we run from the possibility of discomfort constantly. The obvious problem with this is that, by running from discomfort, we only do activities and opportunities within our comfort zones. And since our comfort zones are relativity small, we miss out on most of life’s greatest experiences. We keep doing what we’ve always done, and thus we keep getting the results we’ve always gotten. Instead go to environments that expand your mind. Spend time with people who inspire you to stretch yourself. Take time to do the fun things be creative and play more.

3. Remind yourself to take a deep breath when things don’t go your way. Your results in the long run—good or bad—are always the byproduct of many small decisions, outcomes, and events over time. The truth is we all fail sometimes. The greater truth is that no single failure ever defines us. Learn from your mistakes. Grow wiser. Press on. Character and wisdom are sculpted gradually. They come with loss, lessons, and triumphs. They come after doubts, second guesses, and unknowns.

4. Calmness is a human superpower. The ability to not overreact or take things personally keeps your mind clear, your heart at peace, and yourself moving forward. Take constructive criticism seriously, but not personally. Listen to others, and then operate with your own intuition and wisdom as your guide.

5. Do your best to focus inward whenever you need a moment to refocus. Time spent focusing inward doesn’t just help you—your mind is powerful and your thoughts create ripples in other people’s lives. When you bring clarity into your life, you bring the best of yourself into everything you do—you tend to treat yourself and others better, communicate more constructively, do things for the right reasons, and ultimately improve the world you’re living in. This is why praying, or just meditating on positive mantras, on a daily basis can actually make a real-world difference in your life.

Start taking the next small, insignificant step (one at a time, every day) and you might be surprised where you end up. (inserts from Marc and Angel Hack life blog)

Laura Welborn, Mediator, LCAS. Contact [email protected]

State’s Secrets and the Swamp that Needs Draining

By EARL COX

Special to The Record

President Donald Trump blocked a recent State Department effort to force Israel to return $75 million in military aid, the department’s most recent attempt to erode the U.S.-Israel military alliance. State’s demand was shocking, but it shouldn’t be surprising.

Rex Tillerson's State Department has been embroiled in a power struggle with the White House, thwarting its efforts to remove Obama holdovers - and Trump nominees from filling open staff positions.

But long before Obama appointees clogged Trump's efforts to drain the swamp, previous administrations dealt with State Department undertow. Generally conflicts between DOS and the White House, Congress and the courts, are turf wars over who controls foreign policy. This dynamic has plagued several administrations - and impacted U.S. relations with Israel.

Anti-Semitism has lurked in State’s corridors for decades, and under the guise of diplomacy, has used subversive or covert tactics to manipulate foreign policy. Despite pressure from his State Department, Herbert Hoover defended the concept of a Jewish state; and under Franklin D. Roosevelt, DOS-mandated immigration policy “severely limited” German Jewish immigration during the Holocaust, and visas for Jewish refugees in Vichy France, according to Rafael Medoff, founding director of the David S. Wyman Institute for Holocaust Studies. Harry S. Truman stood against his State Department by supporting Israel’s establishment in 1948—while behind his back an undersecretary threatened to “foment anti-Semitism that could destroy the fledgling Jewish government’s support base in the U.S.” unless Zionist leaders caved to his demands, Medoff said.

The State Department is still working to undermine and intimidate Israel. Recently, it hosted the U.S. Council of Muslim Organizations, an umbrella of American Muslim groups such as the anti-Israel, pro-BDS, American Muslims for Palestine. The meeting’s announcement on AMP’s website expressed “concern” about “Israel's denial of religious rights for Muslims and Christians.” Israel is the sole country in the Middle East that protects the rights of all religions—Muslims, Christians, Jews and Druze. USCMO secretary general Oussama Jammal remarked the group was encouraged by “the constructive dialogue at the State Department.”

The Center for Security Policy warned in 2015 that USCMO leads the Islamic Movement in the United States “in pursuit of Civilization Jihad.” Jammal, who has a track record of seeking out strategic relationships with the U.S. government on behalf of the Muslim Brotherhood, is connected to Saul Alinsky’s Industrial Areas Foundation, a Marxist-Leninist organization “dedicated to revolution in America,” CSP said. Another nip at Israel’s heels is the just-released State Department 2016 Country Reports on Terrorism. The report blames Israel for Palestinian terrorism against Israelis, citing the Palestinians’ “lack of hope” in the peace process. Tillerson’s report whitewashes Palestinian Authority leaders’ incitement of violence and financial support for terrorists. It also defines PA calls for terrorism and violence against Israelis as "rare,” and says the PA leadership “does not generally tolerate it.”

In response, Rep. Peter Roskam, co-chair of the House Republican Israel Caucus, sent a letter to Tillerson noting “harmful mischaracterizations” in the report that impair the peace process. “To effectively combat terrorism,” he wrote, the United States must “accurately characterize its root cause—the PA leadership … and clarify … Palestinian support for terrorism as the leading impediment to Israeli-Palestinian peace."

In a strike against the heart of its own republic, a senior State Department contracting officer tried to silence two security contractors disturbed by deteriorating security at the U.S. Embassy in Libya prior to the tragic 2012 attack, a recent Fox News report revealed. The officer also asked the contractors to publically agree with State that “guards should not be armed at U.S. embassies” and “they weren't required in Benghazi.” Those responsible for the lapses and cover-up in Libya are still in place, the contractors said.

The State Department has more than 300 embassies, consulates and diplomatic missions around the world. In a healthy democracy that’s not under siege, this would be an indicator of positive national influence thrin a government divided against itself, it’s dangerous—not only for the U.S.-Israel alliance, but also for the future of American foreign policy

This mammoth organization endangers the democratic process by collaborating with a Deep State—reminiscent of dictatorships with democratic facades. By breaching public trust with secrecy, veiled threats and disregard of human life—including its own—it demonstrates moral compromise and disregard for the democratic process. Unless the Trump Administration can rein it this rogue department, it endangers America and puts our allies at risk. Trump must unclog and drain the swamp before another debacle—or tragedy—occurs.

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mrlongkgraves · 7 years

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Saving Vanessa, part 1: A mystery rash, a stroke and an epic rescue

Vanessa’s rash first appeared on her arms and legs when she 3 or 4 months old. It was red and bumpy and went away when she was sick with a virus, which happened often. Then it would come back. The dermatology team she saw at Boston Children’s Hospital was puzzled.

“I was expecting they were going to think it was nothing, but they took it very seriously,” says Katherine Bell, one of Vanessa’s mothers. “They took a biopsy and very quickly realized they had no idea what it was.”

Vanessa’s case was even featured at a regional dermatology conference where doctors take up mystery patients. “A hundred to 150 dermatologists just looked at her,” says Katherine. But no one could pinpoint a diagnosis.

Vanessa was then hit with a series of viral infections, and the rash went away for good. But other problems surfaced: she became anemic and increasingly fatigued. A hematologist prescribed iron supplements, which didn’t work.

“It got to the point where she was barely eating, was throwing up, wasn’t playing,” Katherine says. “She was clearly in pain. She was fading away, losing weight, wasn’t walking.”

Finally, a vomiting episode worried Katherine and her wife, Nancy Mendoza, enough to bring Vanessa, who had just turned 2, to Boston Children’s Emergency Department (ED). She was admitted for testing, received a feeding tube and had a brain MRI, which was normal. The Rheumatology Program team was consulted, and she saw Dr. Pui Lee, a fellow in the Division of Allergy and Immunology.

Living with uncertainty

Based on her blood work, Lee and Rheumatology Program director Dr. Robert Sundel, diagnosed Vanessa with periodic fever syndrome, a catch-all term for various disorders in which the immune system is activated despite no apparent infection. Not knowing the exact cause, Lee prescribed an anti-inflammatory medication to calm the immune response.

Katherine has pushed for scientific study of Vanessa’s disease, spearheading an academic conference and a patient registry. More on our science blog, Vector.

That helped a little, but over the next three months, Vanessa had fevers every day. She was switched to a different anti-inflammatory medication, but she remained lethargic, vomited frequently, had joint pain and no appetite. Genetic testing, a spinal tap and a colonoscopy all came back negative.

Since Vanessa had high blood levels of IL-6, an inflammatory protein, her rheumatologists decided to try an IL-6 inhibitor that had recently become available for systemic juvenile arthritis. It seemed to work almost immediately: Vanessa began eating, playing and gaining weight — even went on vacation in Maine.

But soon after, Vanessa woke up one night crying, saying, “I don’t feel good,” and began throwing up. She’d had similar episodes, but Katherine and Nancy followed their instincts and brought her to the ED.

“Something just seemed different,” Katherine says.

An assault on the brain

The charge nurse in the ED agreed. Vanessa’s heart rate was falling, her blood pressure spiking. The Code Team and Dr. Todd Lyons, the attending emergency physician, worked to get her heart rate up and her blood pressure down. “Dr. Lyons was listing priorities, keeping everyone focused,” Katherine says. “He told me, ‘Stand next to me and I will explain everything.’”

Around 4:30 a.m., Vanessa had a CT brain scan, which showed massive bleeding. Emergency treatments were started to try to lower the dangerously high pressure inside her head. Around 6 a.m., neurosurgeon Dr. Scellig Stone, did emergency surgery, pausing briefly on the way to the operating room to get more imaging. He was looking for abnormal arteries that might have caused the bleed.

“She had bleeding both inside the brain and on the surface of the brain,” says Stone. “Together, these bleeds were causing critical pressure on the brain. With those sorts of findings, every minute counts.”

In the OR, Stone and colleagues removed the blood clot and the blood around and inside Vanessa’s swelling brain tissue. Then he went to speak with her parents.

“He looked pretty devastated,” recalls Katherine. “She was having a massive stroke on the operating table. They weren’t sure she would make it.”

The surgeons left a portion of Vanessa’s skull bone off after surgery to accommodate the brain swelling. “It’s a desperate move, something we do in only the most severe situations,” says Stone. “I was concerned she would not survive the injury and that if she did, she would have significant brain damage.”

A reprieve, a setback and a question

But the quick action — launched by her mothers’ instincts — saved Vanessa’s life. “If it had been a week earlier, we’d have been in Maine,” says Katherine. “She would not have survived.”

After several days in the ICU, Vanessa started moving her hands, fighting her breathing tube. “Dr. Stone saw hope in that,” says Katherine.

Amazingly, when Vanessa woke up, she was herself again. Except for one thing: she talked to her doctors for the first time. The loss of part of her brain’s frontal lobes to the stroke had made her less inhibited.

But nine days later, Vanessa had another stroke — on the other side of her brain —causing a prolonged, intractable seizure. This required another brain operation to place a temporary drain, which was later removed without incident. She remained in the hospital another month.

Last November, Stone and plastic surgeon Dr. Carolyn Rogers-Vizena, grafted in bone from the opposite side of Vanessa’s skull to replace what had been removed, as well as bone around the surgical site that the toddler’s body had absorbed (a common occurrence in children this age). They replaced that bone with bits of bone from various skull locations. “We created a kind of paste that grows over time and solidifies into a firm skull bone,” Stone explains.

A healthy child, a lingering mystery

Today, to all eyes, Vanessa has had a remarkable turnaround. Now age 4, she’s back to being a playful, creative, articulate, imaginative child who loves music and dancing. Her cognition seems intact. Because she lost part of her frontal lobes, she may have issues with attention and impulsiveness — but it’s something that can be lived with.

Vanessa now has a genetic diagnosis: deficiency of the enzyme ADA2, or DADA2. She receives a weekly injection of Enbrel, another drug originally approved for arthritis. For now, her immune condition seems to be under control, but the diagnosis is so rare that there is almost no data on what to expect in the long term.

Vanessa with her big sister Margot.

What happened to Vanessa’s immune system to cause her stroke? Is there a long-term “fix”? Those lingering questions have launched an ongoing inquiry. Part two of Vanessa’s story continues on our science blog.

The post Saving Vanessa, part 1: A mystery rash, a stroke and an epic rescue appeared first on Thriving Blog.

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