#so in the end I left it all in because it is my authentic reaction to this part of the arc

[frankenkyle19]

Go Slow, Speedster

Peter Maximoff x reader smut

description: word count 1.1k (I hate this but I wanted to put something out for you guys) You teach Peter that going fast isn’t always how it should be done

No one but yourself would know how much of a whiney bitch Peter Maximoff was in bed. It almost seemed a bit over the top at times, but it was a 100% authentic reaction. He was a big baby, and a pillow princess. 

He wanted what he wanted and he wanted it when he wanted it. The only problem was sometimes he got carried away. Cared too much for his own pleasure and left you wanting. He didn’t do it on purpose of course, and always made sure to apologize, but in the moment he got so lost in his own pleasure that he really couldn’t think of anything else.

That’s why it was your job to teach him. Patience was a virtue after all, and little Peter would soon learn the pleasures of going slow. 

It had been another normal day. Well, as normal as your day could be when you were dating a mutant with superspeed. He had just finished a mission, something or another, he didn’t really care to share about his ‘job’ with you, because he found it boring. And because he found better ‘things’ to do with you.

That’s how you had ended up completely undressed with him on top of you in under a minute. Damned super speed. 

Now sure, you loved seeing him like this, but sometimes you liked it slow, and that was definitely not something Peter did a lot. In every aspect of his life he was unnaturally fast, so of course it was the same in the bedroom.

You tried to pry your lips away from his own for just a second as he whined, his cock hanging heavy between the two of you as he looked at you with those sweet puppy dog eyes of his. So tempting.

“Can I put it in? Please momma-“ you felt a shiver crawl up your spine at his words. He knew exactly how to get his way. But not today. Today you wouldn’t give in. 

He rutted against you impatiently, a thick trail of sticky pre-cum rubbed against your thigh. He huffed quietly as he awaited an answer. 

A smile crept onto your lips and Peter, bless him, mistook this as a good thing. It was a good thing, but not for him.

Before he knew it, you had completely taken control of the situation. To be fair… you were always in control of Peter. He was wrapped around your finger.

“Go ahead baby, fuck me-“ He wasted no time in positioning his leaky cock at your entrance.

“But-“ you stopped him, reaching down and running your thumb over the thick, red cockhead that sat at your entrance.

Peter mewled, bucking up against your hand as he cried out. 

“Momma-“

“Let me talk, Peter. Or you won’t get anything, okay baby boy?”

He bit his lip to keep quiet and nodded, eyes hazy and body buzzing with energy.

“You can fuck me, but, you’re going to go at my pace tonight.”

It could be worse for him. You could deny him the ability to fuck you at all. This shouldn’t be too bad, he could do this… Right?

He nodded once more, finally, finally getting to feel your tight heat envelop him. He instantly finds a pace that suits him, only to be stopped by you squeezing your thighs around his waist.

“Ah ah ah, slowwww, Mr. Quicksilver.”

He groaned softly. He always loved when you called him quicksilver and you never really knew why. Maybe he had some weird superhero fucking their fan fetish. Didn’t really matter to you, you didn’t mind calling him that so it was fine.

“Momma-“ he complained, hips still moving slowly in and out of you. So he was going to be stubborn. Well, that’s his own fault. 

“You want to be a good boy for me don’t you? Then go slow. Feels so good for me when you go slow. I know it feels good for you too.”

He swallowed down a whimper as he nodded, his hips meeting yours with gentle, slow thrusts. You could tell it was killing him by the way sweat formed on his brow and his whole body shook.

Your head fell back into the pillows as you let out a quiet sigh. It felt so good to have him go slow for once. He grazed those sensitive spots inside you perfectly like this.

Peter buried his face in the crook of your neck, leaving hot, open mouthed kisses there. He was doing better than you thought, until you felt drops of what felt like water on your neck.

 He was crying.

“Baby boy, hey- what’s wrong?”

“Wanna go fast momma- please- fuck I need it please I’ll be good next time just let me- please-“ he sniffled desperately, his cock quite literally vibrating inside of you.

This had been progress, so you couldn’t be too mad. Plus he had asked so nicely.

“Okay baby, just don’t go too fast.” You chuckled, already reaching to hold onto his shoulders. 

He could go fast. Like really fast. But despite how fast he could be, he never fully let himself go, because he never wanted to hurt you.

He held his head up as he got into a better position before he began to thrust back into you. His pace was absolutely brutal, and the sound of slick skin slapping against skin was absolutely sinful. 

His moans were even more so. He was so vocal you’d think he was in pain. Nope. Quite the opposite.

“Fuck! Fuck fuck fuck-“ he cursed, hips now moving at almost inhuman speed against you, bed creaking as he fucked into you, his body blurred at the edges from how fast he was going.

You could tell he was close by the way the muscles in his neck began to pop out and get more prominent. Gasping, you clawed at his back as he hit a heavenly spot inside you. Maybe this wouldn’t be too bad.

“Oh fuck Peter- quicksilver- just like that, right there, I’m close.” You choked out, holding onto him for dear life as he fucked you into the mattress.

Peter seemed to double down his efforts, determined to get you there before he fell over the edge himself.

It wasn’t long before your pleasure was building until it could no more. The band in your stomach snapped as waves of pleasure washed over you, sending you into a blurry, hazed euphoria.

Peter pulled out of you, stroking himself at inhuman speed, his hand flying across his cock so fast you could barely even see his movements. He came across your chest, doubling over in pleasure. His hand fell away from his cock as the last of his release dribbled from his tip. 

Maybe next time he’d learn that being slow could feel just as good. 

[darkeralmond]

could you do a friends with benefits fan fiction with conrad fisher? and maybe they get together at the end?

ofc i can!! tysm for the request!! i love u ❤️❤️❤️

Escort?

Conrad Fisher x Reader

synopsis: you and conrad had always been close growing up. you cared for him and he cared for you. when him and nicole broke up, he came to you for comfort. that’s when this whole fling started. now the deb ball was coming up and you wanted things to become more serious.

warnings: fluff, fwb relationship, Conrad being adorable, suggestive dialogue

word count: 1k

a/n: I COULDNT STOP SMILING WHILE WRITING THIS!! this is such an adorable concept tysm for the request!

masterlist | request info

You had been going down to Cousins for as long as you could remember. You always came down with the Fishers and would stay for only half the summer. Then when the 4th of July hit, your mom would come down to hang out at the beach house before taking you home. However, that changed this summer since your motm wanted you to participate in the Debutante Ball with Belly.

Things had changed since a couple summers ago. You ended up in a messy relationship with one of the football players at your high school, Lucas. The two of you broke things off since neither of you could provide what the other wanted. It broke you. Your friends comforted you, sure, but Conrad’s comfort was the only thing to get you through the break up.

You then had to reciprocate that same comfort after he and Nicole broke things off because of an unknown reason. Just like what happened after you and Lucas, you comforted him in the beach house bedroom. The only difference was the outcome of your care. That's when the pattern of hooking up as “just friends'' started. That's when your true feelings for Conrad finally emerged.

Now here you two were, making out to TV Girl’s “Lover’s Rock” on his bed. It was truly romantic in the most platonic way possible. You laid on top of Conrad as his hands ran up and down your thighs gently like you were fragile. Your mind strayed off during the long period of kissing.

The Deb ball was coming up in the next couple of days and it seemed like all your Deb sisters had an escort but you. Now that both you and Conrad were out of your complicated relationships, it left you with an open opportunity to ask him.

You then thought about how Belly would react to that, she’s always had an obvious crush on Conrad. Would that be betraying her? No because she started dating Cam and now she’s going with Jeremiah. Why would she care if you went with Conrad when she’s obviously occupied with other guys?

You pulled away from the kiss and looked down at him, clearly distressed. Being only friends didn’t feel right to you anymore, frankly because your crush on Conrad grew to the point where it was hard to ignore. He furrowed his eyebrows and cracked a smile. “What?”

You got off of him and flopped down onto the mattress next to him. You laid on your side and met his gaze. “Conrad?” you mumbled.

He chuckled, “Yeah?”

You took a deep inhale and looked up at the ceiling. The tips of your ears felt piping hot, the words hung in your throat ready to escape. It was just one simple question. You finally blurted it out, “Would you… Would you like to be my escort to the Deb ball?”

Your heart raced as you met his gaze again. His expression shifted from playful confusion to pure authentic confusion. “What?” he asked. “Why?”

That wasn’t the reaction you were hoping for. You didn’t expect him to flat out say yes, but you didn’t expect him to sound so… confused?

“Well,” you started, “I don’t have an escort yet and I just thought now that you and Nicole aren’t a thing and Wes and I aren’t a thing that we could go… together.”

You couldn’t picture yourself going with anyone else. You couldn’t picture yourself with anyone else, period. Only Conrad. It was always only Conrad.

“Y/N, be honest,” he sighed. “Do you have feelings for me?” You suddenly felt feverishly hot as your cheeks flushed with embarrassment. You transferred your gaze down to the hem of his t-shirt as an excuse to not look him directly in his eyes. All you had to do was say no, but the silence was his answer. “Y/N, I thought we were gonna keep this strictly just being friends.” He pinched the bridge of his nose while letting out a long exhale,

“Yeah, well have you met you?” you argued. “It’s pretty hard not to fall in love with you and your mysterious persona.”

The seriousness on his face melted away as he chuckled. “Mysterious persona?” He laughed harder which eased your nerves slightly. You cracked a nervous smile and he collected himself before speaking again, “How long have you felt this way?”

Your feelings for Conrad had always been hidden deep in your heart, but they didn’t become known until that night at Shayla’s party. “The first night we fucked after Nicole dumped you.” It wasn’t unbearably long, but it was still too long to keep a secret that big.

His hands cupped your cheeks, lifting your chin up so you could meet his eyes. “I like you, don’t get that mixed up,” he said, “but relationships are really messy. I just don’t want you getting hurt.”

You brought your hand up to meet his and cracked a small smile. “I know, but if we don’t try something, we’ll never know where it could lead us to?” You felt your heartbeat accelerate. You had only ever done this one before and that was with Lucas. “At least tell me what you think we should do. You’re the smartest person I know.”

He knew how breaking things off with him affected you mentally. He didn’t want to be the reason you ever felt that kind of pain again. Conrad smiled and leaned forward. He placed a light kiss on your lips, “Is the dance still the same?” You giggled and placed your forehead against his. “I hope that means yes.” His thumb stroked your cheekbone. You closed your eyes and savored the contact.

“Yes,” you laughed, “it does.”

His warm breaths mixed with the feeling of his soft yet firm hands on you made you feel secure. He was your safety net. The person who could always make sure you were okay even when things weren’t looking up. He was yours to keep.

[thesiltverses]

character writing tips??

Everything's subjective, but for me:

For character creation (as for plotting, as for worldbuilding), each of us ultimately has to find our own best practice and preferred method through trial and failure. There's a vast spectrum of tips ranging from 'create a bullet-pointed list of their favourite foods, make them a playlist of their favourite songs, make sure you understand every facet of who they are and where they've been before you sit down to write them' and 'discover the character as you write them!' and there's no objective answer. I like to give my characters a starting point, a starting goal, and starting principles, then toss them in the deep end and see how they react and change over time, but that's not for everyone. Try every approach and adjust to taste - does the character start to bore you after ten pages because you've already written them out as a straitjacketed profile and there's nothing left to find out? Or could you do with having a clearly defined arc, or more small personal habits or peccadillos?

2. For continuous character development (particularly if you're writing something serialised and longform like a podcast, particularly if you're writing for an internet audience), try and identify - and then be prepared to constantly out-think - the temptations that lead to calcification or Flanderisation of the character, because the golden fruit often ends up rotting the tree that birthed it.

Beware of your past successes, in other words, because they sway you and they corrupt the character. It's incredibly easy to find yourself straying towards 'oh, it was impactful when X came bursting in to save the day and they haven't really had a moment like that since, how can we recapture that?' or 'people really liked it when Y & Z had a big angsty argument about their feelings, maybe we should be giving them even more angsty arguments about their feelings' or 'the internet loves mean badass women, maybe A should be just incredibly mean and badass in all her interactions so we can get one million likes and be famous.' (I've caught myself doing all of these, and definitely haven't always succeeded in stopping myself.)

But fishing for a specific audience reaction or trying to stage-manage a narrative outcome is how you end up with zombie protagonists - stale archetypes acting out the same formulaic moments over and over in the hope of reliving the old applause, instead of characters that are still authentically capable of change or capable of surprising you.

[cailenbraern]

Not sure if I can fully articulate my thoughts about Jaskier’s growth as an artist throughout the seasons of The Witcher but I'm going to give it a go.

Because when we meet him in season 1 , he's more or less just starting out. He's fresh from Oxenfurt and determined to make a name for himself on the continent. The trouble is, he's got nothing to draw on. He's still young so his experience is negligible. He performs songs about monsters and creatures with little accuracy or meaning, and we meet him being jeered and pelted with food.

Meeting Geralt gives him a new inspiration for original songs, although he's not truthful, particularly in Toss a Coin. As Geralt said, that's not what happened, and Jaskier responds with respect doesn't make history. He's still too young and too inexperienced to realise what impact his songs can have, and he's solely determined to improve the reputations of Witchers along with his own reputation.

The two other songs in season 1 are Fishmongers Daughter, which I'm not going to discuss in any detail, and Her Sweet Kiss. Now one cane argue that the latter is heavily drawn from personal emotion and feeling, but the end result is a fairly normal ballad style of song with poetry as lyrics and vivid imagery and metaphors. It's a start, but Jaskier still has a long way to go.

Then we get to season 2, where we find Jaskier in the early stages of recognition. We see him performing in a packed bar, with accompaniment, and the crowd are lapping it up. It helps that the song he's singing comes, as per his own words, from the heart. Burn Butcher, Burn is 100% emotion, 100% authentic, and gone is the poetry. The lyrics are raw and passionate.

Despite this, we're led to believe that he found his fame with The Golden One. In contrast with BBB, this song lacks any emotional punch. It's purely a story or anecdote set to music. A fun little ditty, but unless you can suspend your disbelief, if open to criticism. As happens when attempting to smuggle the Elves onto the ship.

Now, we know that at this point, Jaskier has done and seen and experienced far more things than he had in season 1, and this has left an impact on him. He has matured and developed his sense of empathy and his kindness so much more than the immature travelling bard showed in Posada, thanks tp witnessing the violence and persecution of the elves, while also dealing with his own broken heart. Yet he's still clinging on to his want and desire to be respected and applauded for his skill and talent in writing and singing songs, so we see that he does not take criticism well.

More happens in season 2 to shape and form him, Rience's torture for one, the massacre at Kaer Morhen, his friendship with Yennefer and his mending (such as it is) of his friendship with Geralt along with the continuing politics all across the continent.

I do have a soft spot for Whoreson Prison Blues. The first two verses are beautiful, followed by a very crude, very catchy chorus. I can't imagine he would include it in future sets, but it's so personal to him in that moment that I love it.

Little wonder that by Season Three, we are met with yet more changes in our bard. His words to Radovid stating that he doesn't 'do pretty' suggest to me that he has consciously decided to move away from filling his songs with poetry and imagery and is focused more on honesty and truth. Extraordinary Things which immediately follows is a perfect demonstration of Jaskier singing openly and from the heart.

But what I wanted to get to in this long winded post, is that this is the season we finally see the Emotional Impact Jaskier's songs have on other people. No criticisms, no jokes, just the power of his music.

Whatever your opinion on Radovid and his motivations, Extraordinary Things affected him. You can see this in his reaction as he hears it for the first time, and he so clearly can't get it out of his head after hearing it only one time, that he goes above and beyond to learn it.

Next is Ciri, and we see Jaskier singing a lullaby (which he may or may not have written himself, jury's out on that) to her. Later, in the desert, she sings the lullaby back to herself, drawing strength and courage from it. This power has been given by Jaskier through his singing, making her feel safe and loved in a vulnerable moment.

Finally, Eternal Flowers, which I'll say here, is the best I've ever heard Joey sing, both on the album version and in the live performance on the show. He has his lute, but he lays it down like laying down a weapon. It's just him, stripped bare, open, vulnerable, honest, true. This is not his song, but he feels the emotion and the message as thought it was. His empathy is shining. It moves him to tears, but not only him, the Dryads also feel the emotion he is channelling, and it moves them to tears.

I don't have much of a conclusion to this ramble, but TL;DR, Jaskier’s songwriting and art has evolved over the three seasons and his bardic power is a might force to be reckoned with. He will be remembered long after Valdo for his honesty and beauty.

Not pretty. Real.

[hexfloog]

(Episode 404, The Mysterious Angel's Mansion - pt. 2)

This little scene is probably one of my favorite DB interactions in the entire show -v- Everything from the way they got here— that is, Conan deliberately starting shit (and then throwing hands sksksk)— to the way they each react to the situation, to the eventual resolution and their implied state of their relationship with Conan...

To be fair, their dynamic is more than implied and we see it in action all the time, but rarely do we get to see anything apart from the reactionary, situational interactions necessitated by some external circumstance. Friends sometimes fight amongst themselves, kids even moreso, but the DB often get tangled in such dire, life-or-death situations that we usually don't get to evaluate the friendship beyond raw reactions to things like Genta nearly being shot, Mitsuhiko going missing, drivers taking off with Ayumi in the trunk, etc.

You could happily argue that this is just proof of strong relationships, because there's no time to premeditate anything and they're forced to be little balls of instinct-- and I would agree, but that's not the angle I'm taking with this scene.

Obviously, Conan is Team Mom, always spearheading the charge and guiding and looking after the others, but if the DB rarely hear Conan apologize for anything (as is the implication here), it fits right in with his character. He's a proud individual and having to even associate with children is, at least in the beginning of the series, embarrassing to him. Haibara even teases him a little afterwards with an observation that it's "tough" to motivate kids, possibly referring to the mental mountain he had to summit by admitting that he was wrong.

The only thing that could maybe make me like this scene more is if Conan's authenticity were less nebulous, but that same ambiguity is exactly what makes this scene appealing to me, too: reuniting the group by forcing a conflict to overcome despair and hopelessness and press onwards for the sake of someone else is, to Shinichi, probable justification to be both disingenuous or earnest about an apology, so I'm… well, I don't come away from this scene really knowing which one it is, and I... kind of love that. The series struggles with grey areas and I will absolutely take what I can get here

So does anyone think he meant it? Shinichi obviously cares about the children, so the natural answer is yes, but whether he's more or less honest about his apology has no bearing on the result— the kids stop fighting either way— so... at least in my head... there is no correct answer. It's left entirely to the viewer and just comes down to how you interpret his character: if he meant it, cool, the fact that he cares enough about the kids to put aside his pride for them is selfless and delightful; if he didn't, well... that's equally intriguing, isn't it? Maybe he's simply too proud to apologize and mean it, and the fight was just a means to an end (and nothing more) so that they could continue pursuing the solution to their dilemma... which could mean that Shinichi has an enduring problem prioritizing the mystery* over his peers (exactly the thing that got him into the Conan mess in the first place)...

This is a very short scene but goddamn if I don't enjoy the hell out of it. I love the kids and I wish they did more open-ended stuff with them like this (sobbing)

[little-pup-pip]

Uhm so I was wondering, how you tell someone you are agere and petre. I have a really close friend and I would like them to know

Hello! This is a complicated topic that most of us have to face at some point. Of course, I don't know your friend, and I can't give you a perfect step-by-step guide for your individual situation. I'm also not great at giving advice in general. Still, I can tell you about my experiences with this and how I told people!! I hope this helps!

The first person I ever told was my best friend. The circumstances are strange, though, because it was when they were telling me that they regress! When they were finished, I was just like "!! Me too!!!" And we were both very relieved that everything was out in the open. This story was amazing when it happened, but it probably isn't an educational lesson because there often isn't a perfect opportunity to tell someone something so personal.

That's where we get into the second person I ever told! My dear, at the time ignorant, boyfriend. I was afraid to tell him initially, even though I knew deep down he wouldn't react poorly. This story is kind of funny as well because my extensive, mentally planned-out discussion with him didn't actually end up happening either. Instead, I involuntarily regressed right in front of him!

He had no idea what was happening, and was very surprised by the whole situation. Eventually, when I was able to actually participate in an adult conversation, we talked it through, and I explained everything to him. He had lots of questions, and it took him a while to figure out his feelings and role in the whole thing. Even then, confused and caught completely off-guard, he was very open-minded because he cares about me, and he's my CG now!

I think it's important to talk about these things in a mature, open-minded, and loving way that allows both sides to express their thoughts. If your friend has no experience with Agere or Petre, they're probably going to have questions and maybe a knee-jerk reaction that seems negative. Perhaps they'll need time to think about it, or do research, or talk through it. Maybe they'll surprise you! All you can do is be patient and honest with them and hope that they're a true friend who will support you no matter what.

As you've just read, I never really had a serious, planned-out discussion where I sat someone down and revealed my secret to them unprompted, as you likely plan to. Clearly, you trust this person. Therefore, the relationship you share is presumably strong enough to allow you both to be your authentic selves without judgment or fear. The fact that you want to tell them at all says a lot about how much you care about them, so the only thing left to do is go for it!

[bizlybebo]

please use this ask to scream at me when you finish season 1 💜

I want to see your reactions

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUH HOLY SHIT.

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HIOLY HSIT.

god. so.

i finished season one at like 1am and it fucking tore me apart. i sat in silence and just stared at the wall for a HOT minute. i couldn't actually comprehend wtf i just witnessed.

and holy fuck i have some WORDS

first off.

ASHE WINTERS WHAT THE FUCK ASHE WINTERS HO YMGOD ASHE WINTERS I LOVE ASHE WINTERS MORETHAN ANYTHING ON THIS STUPID FUCKING GODFORSAKEN PLNET. SHES. SO. :((((((((((((((((((

ASHE WINTERS AND DAKOTA COLE/?? TLIKESRERJKHTAWKJR THEY WRE LITERLALY IN LOVE.

HOLY FUCK THE IMPACT THAT THIS IS GOING TO HAVE ON DAKOTA??

AND DONT GET ME STARTED ON WAVELENGTH. MARK LITERALLY LOST EVERYTHING. HIS SON. HIS FREEDOM. LIKE. WHAT THE FUCK. HOLY UFCK WHAT THE FUCK

IT'S SUCH A SUDDEN ENDING AND I LOVE/HATE IT SO MUCH. HOW SUDDEN THE LOSS IS MAKES IT FEEL THAT MUCH MORE REAL

BUT HOLY FUCK ASHEEEE. SHE MADE HTE GREATEST SACRFIICEEEEEEEEEE OH YM GODDDDDD. I GET PHYSICALLY ILL THINKING ABOUT HER. LITERALLY I WAS TELLING SAMMY THE OTHER NIGHT THAT I THOUGHT ABOUT ASHE WINTERS WHILE LISTENING TO A SAD SONG AND NEARLY THREW UP. SHES SUCH A BEAUTIFULLY PUT TOGETHER CHARACTER SHES SO FUCKING. AUTHENTIC. MY HEART BROKE A THOUSAND TIMES OVER.

THE TRICKSTER?? SO FUCKING METAL.

ASHE GAVE UP EVERYTHING TO SAVE HER FRIENDS.

SHE GAVE UP EVERYTHING TO SAVE HER FRIEDNSSSSS

SHE NEVER HAD FRIENDS BEFOREEEEE

SHE LOVED THEEEEMMM

THEY CARED ABOUT HER THEY CARED ABOUT HER THEY CARED ABOUT HER

SHE USED THE THING SHE HATED MOST ABOUT HERSELF TO SAVE EVERYBODY. SHE CARRIED HER GRIEF AROUND, LITERALLY. SHE HAD A PHYSICAL MANIFESTATION OF HER GRIEF IN THAT ONE PAGE OF HER BOOK, THE TRICKSTER. IT WAS ALWAYS IN HER POCKET. SHE COULD NEVER LET GO OF HER PAST CAN YOU HEAR MEEEEEEE

"IM TRYING."

"TRY HARDER."

AND SHE DID. SHE GAVE IT HER ALL.

SHEEE TRUSTED THEMMMM. SHE TRUSTED THE PRIME DEFENDERS TO TAKE CARE OF WHATEVER WAS TO COME FROM THIS.

AND WILLAIM TRIED TO BURN HER BOOK AUUAOGOUAHGOUAHGOU IM GONNA MAKE A SEPARATE POST SOON JUST ABOUT THAT BECAUSE OAOOAOOAGAGAGAGAUGHAUGAKRTEJRK HO,Y. FUCK OH MYOGD

AND DONT. GET. ME. STARTED. ON. WILLIAM. WISP.

HOLY SHIT.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT.

HE DIED. HE DIED AND HE CAME BACK AND HE JUST. HAS TO LIVE WITH THAT. AOGUHOAUGHAOUGHOAUGHA

AND. AUGHUHUHUHUGAHGUAHUGHUAGUHAGU HIM AND VYNCENT. FUCK I LOVE GHOSTKNIFE THEY MAKE ME SO HOMOPHOBIC.

DAKOTA COLE IS MY SHINING STAR HE IS ALL THAT IS BEAUTIFUL IN THIS WORLD AUHGUAHUUGHUG. FUCK

HE IDOLIZES HEROES SO GREATLY BUT THEY KEEP FAILING HIM. AND HES STARTING TO GET ANGRY. HES STARTING TO GET ANGRY BEACUSE HIS IDOLS WERE THERE. HIS IDOLS WERE THERE BUT THEY WERE TOO LATE. THEY SHOWED UP A MINUTE LATER, NOT A MINUTE BEFORE, THE WAY HEROES SHOULD.

AND OUGH. HOUOUUH. HIS BACKSTORY. FUCK

HE. HE. I CANT EVEN TALK ABOUT HIM I CANT PUT HIM INTO WORDS (SLASH VERY AFFECTIONATE AND POSITIVE)

"BUT I WASN'T DC BACK THEN."

"I CAN BARELY EVEN REMEMBER HER NAME. BUT I REMEMBER HER FACE."

"SHE WAS JUST A KID, TRYING TO GET AWAY FROM SOMETHING TOO."

DO YOU KNOW WHA TTHIS MEANS TO EMEEEE. WHAT HEEE MEANS TO MEEEEEEE. ADKOTA COLEEEEE. BOUCNING HIM AROUND IN MY BRAIN FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER

NEVER BEFORE HAS A CAMPAIGN MADE ME FEEL. SO MUCH. HERATBREAK AND LAUGHTER AND LOVE AND ANGUISH AND JOY.

IM IN PHYSICAL PAIN SLASH POSITIVE. THEYRE. SO. :((((

AND GOD. DEMONKICKS. FUCKCKKKCK THEY WERE IN LOVEEEEE THEY WERE IN LOVE THEY WERE IN LOVEEE

the final 40 minutes of s1 ep24 tore me apart.

absolutely nothing was resolved, but there was so little time left.

and then ashe pulled out that book, and the trickster was out, and ashe was waning, but there were only 5 minutes left.

and she was gone.

she is gone.

ashe winters is fucking gone and im actually going to cry aagain

[booksandabeer]

TV Round-Up | Jan-Feb 2024

One of my "goals" this year is to keep better track of things I read/watch/listen to (well, other than fanfic) because I'm getting old and forgetful and there's just so much stuff. And isn't this what ✨blogs✨ are for? Due to The Worst Flu in the History of the World, I've been watching a lot of TV recently, so let's start with that:

Barry | Started watching this on a whim about a week ago, am now already on season four and completely losing my mind over it. Why the fuck did no one tell me how good this show is? I mean, I know a lot of people love it and it has received a fair amount of critical praise and awards attention, but that in no way prepared me for just *how* good it is. It's unlike anything else I've ever watched; I wouldn't even know what to compare it to. Maybe Breaking Bad /Better Call Saul, but not because it's thematically or even tonally similar, but because, just like with the Gilligan shows, you never know what the fuck is going to happen next. It takes some WILD swings but until now every single one has landed for me. Season one was very entertaining, season two really hooked me, and season three was mind-blowingly good: It's the showrunners—and the show itself—slowly turning towards the audience until they're looking them right in the eye, and going 'See? This is what we’ve been doing all along. You felt safe in the assumption that this is a comedy, but really, none of this was ever truly funny to begin with; you simply chose to laugh about it. And what does that say about you?' MASTERFUL.

Masters of the Air | Given that I'm a Band of Brothers superfan, I'm the primary target audience for this...and yet, 4 episodes in, I cannot muster up more of a reaction than 'eh, it's fine?' The first warning that this would be a bit of a disappointment came in the form of the overlong opening credits sequence, which is dripping with patriotic kitsch (and yeah, if you already thought that was one of BoB's flaws, believe me, you are not prepared for this). Everything is too clean, too glossy, there's an artificial sheen and a flatness to it that prevents any real immersion into the story. It doesn't help that I do not for a single second buy baby-faced Austin Butler (still doing the Elvis voice!) as a tough USAF major, leading his men into aerial battle. Callum Turner and Barry Keoghan are slightly more convincing in their roles, but it's all giving 'Boyband Goes to War.'

The Curse | I've watched four (?) episodes of this now and I'm not sure if I'm going to stick with it. It's not a bad show at all, but essentially, it's the Succession problem for me all over again. Just like Succession, The Curse is very well acted, produced and directed; it's sharp and funny in that relentless 'secondhand embarrassment' way that you either love or hate (and I don't love it), but in the end, it's a show about terrible people doing terrible things to themselves, each other, and—because they have so much money and power—to the world at large. And I just don't know that I have the energy or the desire to watch them do it for 10 hours—especially when it's often presented in such an irritatingly smug way.

True Detective: Night Country | This is a bit of a weird one. There are a lot of things that I like about this season. The two female leads radiate with impressive presence individually and have great chemistry together; the set design feels both authentic and telegenic; there are brilliantly staged atmospheric and/or body horror sequences (I love The Corpsicle!). And yet there are also a lot of things that don't really come together for me; subplots or characters where I'm left to wonder why they were included at all? Like, Christopher Eccleston, good to see you sir, but why are you even on this show? Everything hinges on the final episode which will (hopefully) reveal that a lot of the elements that are not quite working for me now were in fact not evidence of bad writing, but instead either clever misdirections or hints towards an explanation that is both surprising and satisfying. I sure hope for the latter.

The Fall of the House of Usher | Look, there's no nice way to say this, so I'll just say it: I hated this. It's silly, trashy tv masquerading as a prestige drama. It certainly looks expensive and it has some good or at least beloved actors in it, and...yeah, no that's all I got on the positive side. Not to bring up Succession again, but it really felt like the brief here was 'Succession but dumber and with more gore and sex and mystery!' I made it through 2.5 episodes before admitting to myself that I didn't care about any of the characters and was almost spectacularly uninterested in the central mystery. This was the second TV show that I've started watching based solely on one (1) tumblr gif-set. Unfortunately, it was not nearly the delightful surprise that IWTV turned out to be.

_____________________

Back in early January, I also finished the fifth season of Fargo (excellent performances by Juno Temple and Jon Hamm; overall very good season even if some of the narrative threads felt unresolved; the puppet theater sequence remains an absolute highlight) as well as the third season of Slow Horses (just highly entertaining spy tv; Unlike its protagonists, everything about this show exudes competence and yet no one seems to take themselves too seriously. Kristin Scott Thomas as "Darth Tavener" is magnificent—as is her character's wardrobe. I love this show and I hope they'll renew it forever.)

[queenaryastark]

The Marvels wasn't as bad as the reviews made it seem. There was a lot good about it, in my opinion. Just a few things:

Carol as a character was far more complex and interesting in this than she was in Captain Marvel. She was more of a grey character who made mistakes and even darker choices. I just wish we had seen her make her darkest choices, which led to her destroying the living conditions for an entire planet, in more than just a couple flashbacks.

Kamala and the actress who played her, Iman Vellani, were flawless. She was completely believable as a teen superhero with hyper-fixations. This type of character can easily be annoying, but she never got close to it for me. She was consistently adorable and realistic. Vellani's acting choices when it came to reactions were so authentic. She played Kamala's responses the way a real person would respond in these scenarios. Now I have to watch her Disney+ show.

I loved everything about Monica, which built perfectly off of the character's appearances in both Captain Marvel and Wanda Vision. She was incredibly intelligent, with "mommy" issues regarding Carol that also allowed her to be very human and vulnerable. Her choices at the end of the movie created the best cliffhanger I've seen with Marvel in a very long time. I went in not caring about the movie one way or the other and left wanting more specifically because of Monica.

The dynamic between Carol, Kamala, and Monica was perfect. I could have watched a TV series of them having adventures. Their contrasting personalities worked well together and the way their connected powers kept making them swap places was so unique. I will say that the Carol/Monica dynamic felt more like a mother-daughter relationship than an aunt-niece one.

Kamala's family was so lovable and realistic. Getting more of them is my main reason for checking out Miss Marvel.

So, for me, there was a lot to enjoy in this move. What weakened the story were two incredibly silly moments that should have been cut and the lack of time spent developing the main villain, Dar-Benn. She could have been a lot more interesting had we really seen all the harm Carol did to her people. Had we gotten a Captain Marvel 2 where Carol made her darkest choices, which in turn caused her to harm her relationship with Monica and gave Dar-Benn her villain backstory, this film would have been a lot stronger. As is, I don't think the movie was that bad.

[inkykeiji]

hii! i came across your blog looking for tomura content and saw that you also write for hazbin hotel! i read your alastor fics (which are sooooo good btw) but im curious if reader is supposed to be human? or if she’s a sinner in hell? or because she’s alastor’s pet, she gets access to hell? sorry if it’s a dumb question and i’m probably reading too much into it but reader just seems so normal(ish) ig 💀💀 that’s not at all a bad thing i was just curious. anyway i hope you’re having a good day :))..

hello!! c: aw thank you so much!!! <3 i’m really glad to hear that you enjoy them! ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡ ah okay! so i did write her as a sinner, but i left her sinner attributes and qualities ambiguous for two reasons: 1. they aren’t at all relevant to the stories/pieces (they add nothing to the plot/narrative/concept and aren’t necessary information), and 2. since she’s meant to be a (self)-insert, i wanted to leave specifics vague so anyone could fill them in and construct those finer details themselves. with that being said, you’re more than welcome to interpret her as a human if you’d like to!

she technically does have a backstory that i keep in mind while i write her because she’s me and modelled after my own self-ship with alastor, which is: she ended up at the hotel because she’s one of angel’s drug addict porn star friends, and she is absolutely smitten with alastor the very moment she meets him—instantly obsessed, entirely enraptured, ready to devote herself to him, to worship him in every sense of the word, right then and there...all without a contract. it is a very primal reaction, a powerful, almost innate draw towards him.

and alastor, having never experienced such intense, purely authentic devotion, becomes kind of addicted to it—infatuated with it. it’s obsession on the purest level, although he does eventually grow to feel genuine compassion for his pet too. but what really draws him and fosters his own intense feelings of infatuation and obsession is her unwavering devotion, her wanting and willingness to serve him no matter what. he becomes addicted to it and to the power it grants him.

[mystarmyangel]

[FULL TRANS] 230808 YoonA – ‘King The Land’ Post Drama Interview

Q1: ‘King The Land’ ended amid hot interests. First of all, could you tell me how  you feel about it coming to an end? It was an acting project that I really put in my very best throughout the filming. That is why it feels even more special when it is wrapped up. As much as everyone worked hard, I would like to thank the viewers who loved and watched it with affection as if our hearts are connected. Also, I would like to take this opportunity to say “thank you, you worked hard” to the director, the writer, all the staff and all the actors who worked with me.

Q2: In particular, it was loved by viewers around the world and reached ‘Netflix Global Top 1’. How do you feel when you heard the news? First of all, I was very grateful when I heard the news. I was happy that many viewers around the world loved it, and I was able to realize it even more because many people around me congratulate me. While filming (Netflix) content, when asked about my bucket list, I shouted "'King the Land' Netflix Global No.1", and I was surprised and grateful that it really became a reality. When you go on Netflix, it felt good that our poster were always at no. 1 or the top few ranks on the main page.

Q3: This time, it is a romcom genre that is different from your previous drama ‘Big Mouth’ which was a noir genre, as an actress, you once again broadened the spectrum of challenge. While portraying Cheon Sarang, what are the parts that you paid the most attention to, both externally and internally? I always think about it whenever I start a new work, but this time, I wanted to show a different side of me from what I showed you before as I am challenging my first authentic romcom. On the outside, I would like to say that the transformation is that I cut bangs. I have never done a project with my bangs cut  before, so I had a lot of worries about whether or not to cut my bangs before filming, but this time, I cut my bangs because it seems to suit the loveliness of the character Cheon Sarang. From the result, I was also satisfied and I was proud that I got reactions from people me that it suits me. In terms of acting, as a hotelier, I put in a lot of thought and care in showing the professional side, romance and comedy parts in a well-balanced manner. I also reflected the details of what I learnt from actual hoteliers, the basic attitude and the serving posture, and I practiced smiling a lot just like Cheon Sarang did in the drama. I also paid attention to convey lines and actions that reveal a sense of duty and responsibility in more details. In addition to the romance and comedy parts, emphasizing teamwork and tiki-taka with the other actors, focusing on emotional delivery and facial expressions, paying attention to the tone and diction so that they can be seen as more natural and realistic reactions.

Q4: In particular, Cheon Sarang was a character with independence and individuality who went through the lobby desk with only her skills and went up to VVIP Lounge ‘King the Land’, the dream of all hoteliers. In the last episode, she left King Hotel and pursued her own dream. Is there a message that you wanted to tell through the growth of Cheon Sarang? Although romance was the main content of our drama, but I also paid a lot of attention to the way ‘Cheon Sarang’ was growing as a hotelier, seeking true laughter, and I also thought that the transformation through ‘love’ and ‘saving’ each other was also a stem of our drama. Cheon Sarang was a character who sincerely thought about the hotelier's life, and she was also a character who knew how to love herself. Because she knows how to love herself like that, she was able to be a person who can hold on to her loved ones without missing them and balance between both work and love. In life, there are times when you need courage and comfort, but I hope that the choice of ‘Cheon Sarang’ building her own hotel and finding her new path, diving straight to the emotion of love, and growing up in search of true laughter can be a source of courage and comfort to the viewers.

Q5: There were a lot of famous scenes produced from ‘King The Land’ that received well responses. What are the scenes or lines that are the most memorable for you? There are many of them. First of all, the Thailand fountain scene in episode 10. I think many people like this scene and atmosphere as it is a scene beautifully expressed like that of a fairy tale or a movie. I was satisfied because I think it was captured well and also because it is a scene where we coordinated on the outfits. And the best part of tiki-taka was the drinking scene on Gapado Island in episode 3. It was a scene where Gu Won and Sarang, who growled whenever they met in the beginning, brought up a little bit about each other for the 1st time, and it is an indispensable scene because Won opens his heart to Sarang who treats him sincerely without pretense. (Sarang starts to open her heart for him in episode 5 where he took care of her and celebrate her birthday. From then on, her heart starts to open up to Won little by little). During the actual filming, there were a lot of difficulties because of the strong wind, so I think that makes it more memorable.

Also, for the emotional parts, the scene where Sarang expresses her gratitude to Won for the first time during the helicopter press conference in episode 7, when Won confessed his love for Sarang in her grandmother's room, and in episode 16, the scene where Won tried to propose but failed to do so and instead, sincerely cheered and supported Sarang's dream, and also the scene where grandma cheered for her dream & handed her bankbooks was also memorable as I was genuinely emotional right from the rehearsal onwards.

In addition, the scene of introducing Happy Hour in 3 languages in episode 1, which can show a professional side, was also good as it was one of the scenes that showed Sarang's ability to go up to 'King the Land' from the start. Also, many people told me that they were thrilled with the tablecloth scene in episode 7, where Sarang informed Gu Won on the work. I thought it was a scene where my heart as a hotelier was conveyed well. I also like it because I think it is one of the moments of 'Sarang' that led to the growth and change of 'Gu Won'

I tried to pick only a few scenes from the 16 episodes, but there are too many (Laughs).

(t/l note: thread in twitter for this portion with videos/photos: https://twitter.com/mystarmyangel/status/1688729110733045760)

Q6: ‘King The Land’ was loved by many viewers. What is the most memorable reaction or comment? Or have you ever felt the popularity of the drama? I remembered a lot of the reactions from people who put the ‘King’ word in phrases such as ‘I’m so King into it’, ‘So King precious’. These were the sincere reactions from the viewers who knew the charms of ‘King The Land’ and were enamoured with it. I also felt the popularity of the drama as the people around me called me ‘Cheon Sarang’ rather than my first name, and greeted me with ‘Hermes^^’.

Q7: The chemistry with actor Lee Junho, who plays the role of Gu Won, was also a hot topic. How was the acting chemistry between you two? In a romcom, I thought chemistry between the two was very important, but we agreed well on the highlight points and I received a lot of help from him. That's why we were able to communicate and express comfortably while filming. While rehearsing on the set, we made ad-libs according to the situation & location, or exchanged ad-libs on the spot while filming, and I think all these small details added to the fun of watching it, so I also had expectations of watching the actual broadcast.

Q8: In addition, the chemistry of six siblings with Go Won Hee as Oh Pyeonghwa, Kim Ga Eun as Kang Da Eul, Ahn Seha as Noh Sang Sik, and Kim Jae Won as Lee Rowoon, as well as the chemistry with Kim Young Ok as grandmother, were loved a lot. How is it like filming with these actors? When all six of us got together, we had so much fun filming that the energy changed, all these scenes were so precious to the extent that I felt it was such a pity that we couldn't do more scenes together. It was not easy because it was rare to shoot the entire episode 10 all at outdoor filming locations, but since we are of similar age, the atmosphere seems to have formed more naturally. And we were able to talk a lot about the scenes even during the break and fill it up with our own tiki-taka.

In particular, among the six siblings, the three musketeers were very important to Sarang, and I am grateful that being with actress Won Hee & Ga Eun made it fun both during and outside of filming, hence I was able to spend our time together even more comfortably.

And more than anything, I was really happy and grateful to be able to work Kim Young Ok seonsaengnim, who is the grandmother and the only family’s member for Sarang. Thanks to seonsaengnim's energy & guidance, I learned a lot and was able to film happily.

Q9: What does 'King the Land' means to you and what kind of drama do you want to leave for the viewers? For me, ‘King The Land’ was a work that brought me to the next level of growth, where I was able to learn and experience the joy of making 'together' while sharing worries with the director, actors, and staff on set. I hope the viewers will remember it as a drama that can make people laugh happily with their hearts fluttered, and a drama that is easy and comfortable to watch while feeling the warmth from it.

Q10: Lastly, do you have any words you wish to say to the viewers who loved ‘King The Land’? ‘King The Land’ finished its run with a full happy ending. Just like the characters in 'King the Land'  who found true happiness through solid love, who grow up amidst sincerity, I will also root for the viewers of ‘King The Land’ to sincerely love yourselves and find your true happiness.

I am thankful towards all the people who loved and supported ‘King The Land’ and Cheon Sarang, this gives me a lot of strength, and I want to say thank you. Thank you so much foo loving ‘King The Land’ and Cheon Sarang all this time. And I would be back with the movie ‘2 O’Clock Date’ by director Lee Sang Geun, whom I have worked with in ‘EXIT’, so please show a lot of interest in it as well.

Source: Sports Chosun Trans: mystarmyangel

[thesmokingguns]

I know it’s you

Dating Nikki for three months had been interesting to say the least. He was a bit of a mess at all times and didn't seem to know how to get better. But the way he treated you, the way that he touched you and talked to you. It was unlike any love you had ever experienced before and you were hooked on the way that he made you feel.

"Please, they're all I have." his grandparents were coming to town to stay with him and Nikki's house was not ready to have guests or really be inhabited by anyone. He was trying to get you to stay with him, move in and add the woman's touch that his place was missing.

Also maybe hire a cleaner that he didn't scare away and finally help him make his house into the home that he was desperately craving.

But it being only three months and moving in with him seemed like a red flag to you. Plus you knew that Nikki was trying to be sober and you were scared about trying to help him with that. It felt like a lot of pressure. You weren’t sure that you were going to be the person that he needed and the idea of letting him down or getting him off track made you anxious.

There was also the financial aspect of living with him. Nikki had bought a house, half furnished it and forgot about half the rooms that he had in the house so they remained empty or storage space for the mounds of shit he collected. And NIkki was a full fledged pack rat.. You had a decent job but not the type that could pay half the mortgage or do your fair share in the home. You didn't want to live somewhere where you didn't have a say in what was going on and moving into someone's house felt like you would always feel like a guest there.

"I can't afford living with you. I just don't feel comfortable not contributing alongside you" you bit your lip as he blinked, money hadn't even been something that he thought about because it never really mattered to him now that he had it.

"Why would you pay for anything? You're my girl. I'll take care of you." It seemed so simple to him, he had plenty of money and if he wasn't going to be spending $1000 dollars on drugs and booze he was doing really well.

He didn't understand that you had been on your own for so long that you needed to pay your way. You needed to contribute and not feel like you were someone's burden.

"Just because you're not paying the bills doesn't mean you're not contributing. I need your help making the house a home. That's a full time job. It will be like a practice run for when we're married." Your eyes snapped up from your coffee to look at him.

The red flag olympics were currently going from the national anthems to the medal ceremony at his words. Marriage? Was he out of his goddamn mind?

"We've been together for three months, Nikki." you reminded him, stomach flipping as you tried to calm yourself down from the way he talked about things. The idea of being Mrs. Sixx making your heart beat more than you ever wanted to admit. You felt giddy and you weren’t the type of person to lean into the flimsy feelings like this.

Trying to get a grip on your emotions as you told yourself in the calm, even voice that you were moving too fast and things that moved too fast always ended up burning. But you were letting him reach for your hand, finger strumming over the ring finger of your left hand and thoughts of there being a diamond there as a status symbol of you being claimed made you sit a little taller. Why was the idea of Nikki being your husband, you being his wife causing such a reaction? YOu were wondering to yourself.

"And in three months I already know you're the one, babe. You and me. You're going to be my wife one day. And as much as I know you like to be in charge I hope you know I will want to take care of you and our babies, forever." This was why you loved Nikki; when he told you things you could feel the authenticity in his words.

Babies? Nikki was standing, getting his red flag gold medal as you tried to swallow the lump that was in your throat.

No one had ever loved you the way that he did. No one had ever even come close to loving you with the strength and passion he had. And telling you how he wanted you, how he looked forward to taking care of you and seeing you as an addition and not someone weighing him down was enough to make your eyes sting with the pinprick of tears as you took a shaky breath.

How could you say no to him now?

"Just a practice run, Nikki. I'll stay for the month before and help you get the house together and I'll stay with you when they're there. But I want to keep my apartment in case we decide that this isn't a good idea." You warned him, needing a backup plan for your own sanity.

Nikki was smiling knowing that he had convinced you to come live with him. He had thought it was going to be way more of a drag out fight but was thrilled you had given in to him.

The pair of you were opposites in ways that complimented each other. Nikki was the type who was spontaneous where you thrived off a well organized plan and backup plan B. and C. You could stay calm under pressure where he was ruled by emotions and let things spill out that he should have kept in. Coming from an average childhood you could thrive on normal everyday things like housework or grocery shopping, where Nikki forgot that he had to buy his own toilet paper.

It was good for you two because it made you work together and it seemed like you were the perfect team.

"I'll never change my mind about you." He was lifting your hands to his lips, kissing them.

And as you sat with him you believed him.

[mediocreauthor]

The Tale of Sweet Summer Children, through songs

for Nana Week Day 1 -  dreams / Ai shiteru (愛 してる, “I love you”)

I've prepared a playlist for the most bittersweet couple of the series. And I want to explain how this playlist is constructed while giving my two cents about Hachi and Nobu's relationship.

First of all, here is the playlist:

Act I - Sweetest Summer

I adore Hachi and Nobu individually and together. I keep calling them 'Sweet Summer Children' because... their romance gave me that taste. Somehow how I feel about their love perfectly aligns with what they think about it too.

To quote Todd from Bojack Horseman; "it was nice while it lasted."

But make no mistake, even though it was short-lived Hachi and Nobu didn't share a superficial, forgettable bond. They really had chemistry, genuinely liked one another. They wanted to live up to each other's perception, Nobu wished to be more courageous, Hachi craved the innocence Nobu saw in her. This doesn't mean that they didn't actually know each other. One take I don't agree with is 'Nobu didn't actually know Hachi.' Or 'Hachi wasn't her true self with him'; when you love someone, the desire to be seen as more than you are comes naturally.

Nobu did idealize Hachi but the traits he loved was still authentic to Hachi. Her wit, kindness and beauty, Nobu was taken by these and if he failed to perceive Hachi clearly due to being mesmerized, it doesn't make his love any less meaningful. This is every relationship at the beginning.

I share the same sentiment for Hachi, she wholeheartedly loved Nobu. I think if things didn't get out of control so fast, Nobu was going to be the relationship Hachi was going to put most effort into. Not like 'I have to make this work' but 'I will stand by your side despite the obstacles because that's where I want to be' kind of effort.

So the first act of this playlist opens with My Favourite Fish because... if you listen to it, you will see the melody is exactly how Nobu and Hachi's pining friendship felt to me. That sweet, giddy, airy energy, like eating watermelons after a long day at beach. THE VIBES WERE IMMACULATE

The First Taste to Champagne Coast is for their first night and some days before, when Hachi chose Nobu. And I think the lyrics of The First Taste perfectly describes their rush, how they were irresistible to the other.

Act - 1.2 - Doubt Comes In or It Never Really Left

I added Normal Girl because first of all I never got over CTRL but also for Hachi's inner turmoil and insecurities. Nobu was and will always be the epitome of 'The Right Guy' to her, the guy who'd treat her right, carry her grocery bags, take her on dates however Hachi constantly felt undeserving of that kind of love. Nobu developed an inferiority complex towards Takumi and buried that deep in his heart but these eventually became the doom of their relationship. Insecurity and doubt walk hand in hand and when a surprise pregnancy joins: cue Without You and When am I Gonna Lose You.

The first act ends with Say Something (thanks @komatsunana for the suggestion 💖) and I think... yall know what scene I'm referring to.

Neither Hachi nor Nobu acted wrong that night.

Things could've of course a million different way however their entire world was turned upside down, existing insecurities paralyzed their hearts and the love they nurtured so quickly slipped out of their hands.

Act II - Gray Winter

aaaand then they are left with raw wounds of different kinds. Betrayal, disappointment, confusion, anger, pain of losing someone and the pain of losing the version of yourself when you were with them.

I picked Why Didn't You Stop Me? and Goodbye, My Danish Sweetheart back to back to show... how different Nobu and Hachi's initial reactions were.

Nobu believed Hachi betrayed him, didn't 'choose' him, his feelings of confusion and anger were jumbled together. At Reira and Shin's birthday, even though Hachi explains she never cheated on her, it has no impact on him. He says: you still chose Takumi. You didn't stop me. The song is reproachful and confused, a perfect reflection of Nobu.

We move onto Goodbye, My Danish Sweetheart; showing utter acceptance. I am sorry I am not better, I don't know how to be else. I am sorry I'm not the way you saw me, I really liked that version. I hope you remember me well because to me, there is nobody better than you. I believe it worked out for the best because you were too good for me anyways. Doesn't make it hurt less though. Thank you.

I will continue with 'Glimpse of Us' and 'It Should've Been Me' for Asami and Nobu's... entanglement. Asami - although deserved to be much more, was merely a band-aid. A band-aid that can't serve its purpose because you can't put it on a wound that is actually in need of stitches and time to heal. Asami and Hachi are both social, good looking women exuding joy. Imo, it's very purposeful Nobu was drawn to opposite type of Hachi first but still ended up with Asami.

But with one difference, Nobu doesn't put Asami on a pedestal or perceive her as 'innocent' because of the stigma around sex workers. Just like how Takumi accepting Hachi's 'flaws' comforted her, Asami's 'flaws' being so visible did that to Nobu. He was also trying to prove he wasn't idealizing women or playing hero. Can't say he did a very good job at that.

'Be My Mistake' is for when Hachi and Nobu eventually gravitated back towards each other, after Ren's demise. The demon lord didn't grace them with a proper goodbye or closure, from a relationship they were hopeful about. Both had to bury every feeling, tragedies happening one after another therefore all the pent up pain, love and anger resurfaced at the slightest scratch.

But what could've been a closure only refreshed memories, they still couldn't get over each other. Because they don't want to. They loved loving each other and losing that feeling would've been unbearable.

Act III - Late Spring

The never ending reminiscing of Nobu and Hachi. It's different than the break up, when everything was felt vividly. This pain is muted down, both understanding- hell, even agreeing with one another. They aren't the same as that summer, doesn't necessarily want to return either. But there is yearning and there is friendship.

I tear up when I think of future Nobu and Hachi, still lending a shoulder to each other, cracking jokes and choosing to maintain a connection. I love Nobu asks about Ren, buys gifts for Satsuki.

I find their - i assume very worked on - friendship more precious than their love. Because you did it. You wanted put every effort to cherish this person and even though the life didn't allow you, you found a way. You fought for your friendship instead.

The Act III begins with the 1 and you can count this also as third part of relationships in NANA as Taylor Swift song series because that was the song i was gonna make.

Let's go thorough the lyrics.

I'm doing good, I'm on some new shit Been saying "yes" instead of "no" I thought I saw you at the bus stop, I didn't though I hit the ground running each night I hit the Sunday matinée You know the greatest films of all time were never made

I want to make things clear: Nobu and Hachi aren't unhappy with their life and all the sadness is for Nana. They are missing her and feel her absence. But as cliche as it is life goes on, even without their best friend.

I guess you never know, never know And if you wanted me, you really should've showed And if you never bleed, you're never gonna grow And it's alright now

miss taylor, you did it again. you've described an emotion from NANA perfectly. The second line applies to both and I bet they think exactly this. To Nobu, Hachi went to Takumi. To Hachi, he let her go by immediately assuming she was being unfaithful. A break up so forceful that it shook them to the core and who were seen as most childish ones among the characters became the voices of reason.

But we were something, don't you think so? Roaring 20s, tossing pennies in the pool And if my wishes came true It would've been you i tried to create the energy of this verse with the playlist. if they were the ones who got to live under the same roof, as a family, the life would contain so much more joy. But the life they built separately brought so many other amazing, irreplaceable things. Their love is nothing more than a 'what if' anymore but that's not necessarily a bad thing.

In my defense, I have none For never leaving well enough alone But it would've been fun If you would've been the one

While we can't estimate how things would've played out, if Hachi waited just a bit longer to be with Nobu... maybe some things could've been avoided. It's a big possibility that Hachi'd believe that but also... even getting that small amount time was precious.

I have this dream you're doing cool shit Having adventures on your own You'll meet some woman on the internet and take her home We never painted by the numbers, baby But we were making it count You know the greatest loves of all time are over now

Manga ended with Nobu about to clash with Asami. In the future panels we see no indication he is with someone. i'd like to state that I am single. I think Hachi'd wish love and joy for Nobu no matter how bittersweet it would be. But here, last line is where it hits me.

You know the greatest loves of all time are over now

Ren and Nana was THE couple for them. Their devotion, natural harmony, how they fall back to each other with ease. They were soulmates, meant to be and now their story is a tragedy. The aftermath damaged their life so harshly, everything was changed.

And they are mourning for Nana and Ren's love more than their own.

I, I, I persist and resist the temptation to ask you If one thing had been different Would everything be different today?

How can you not? How can you not go over the possibilities over and over again? I dedicate this more to Nobu because there is also the possibility Takumi is the father of his child. That can't be something easy to swallow, to watch some bastard having the family, the life you might've had.

We were something, don't you think so? Rosé flowing with your chosen family

they had so much fun. treasured so many memories together with BLAST. what made their love so unforgettable was that sweet joy of belonging to a family.

A bunch of people who are yours, on purpose.

And it would've been sweet If it could've been me In my defense, I have none For digging up the grave another time But it would've been fun If you would've been the one

I close the playlist with 'Can You Remember the Rain' so that we think of these scenes and cry:

[alteredsilicone]

The Dark Urge : Act I

A long ramble about my Dark Urge playthrough, split up between acts since this game gets meaty.

This is my third playthrough so more or less I knew what I was getting into (had some durge story bits spoiled too).

When I set out to play durge I also wanted to do an "evil" playthrough, so I set some goals: embrace the "big" durge decisions, be evil when possible without going full murder-hobo. Ally with Gortash, dominate the Brain. Make SH a Dark Justiciar, ascend Astarion, romance Minthara, push Gale towards Godhood and help Lae'zel stay loyal to Vlaakith. The results were... varied.

Recruiting Minthara meant the tieflings had to die, so I indulged the durge by watching Arabella die. Surprisingly this way the game guilt trips you less about doing bad things. (The guilt tripping aspect I will bring up at the very end, after my Act III retrospective)

I quickly learned why durge x Astarion is a popular ship - he really jumps on you from the very beginning, a total 180 to how he treats Tav. Anyways, he wasn't my romance goal so I let him be. For a while.

Alfira is one of my favorites, but she had to go. Sorry. I know there is an alternative by making a different NPC appear but I wanted an authentic(tm) durge experience. Besides, Alfira would die in the grove massacre anyways, two birds with one stone and all.

Dream Guardian interlude - I made her look like my first version of Viri, so it's a Viriception.

Since I'm collecting all the "evil" choices, I also decided to indulge the tadpoles. Partly for achievements, partly to see how it works. Truth be told I didn't use the tadpole skills too much, so if I replay durge (I might do for certain different story outcomes), I will ignore the tadpoles altogether.

Sceleritas Fel was an excellent addition, obviously I humored and indulged him since I wanted to be papa's most specialest murderer.

As I was allying with the goblins I explored some stuff I didn't previously - got shackled up by Gut. Escaping her was quite easy, just had to avoid her afterwards. Then I rushed to Minthara.

I love Minthara's character a lot - she stayed in my party throughout the whole game. Needless to say, but I killed Karlach for Wyll (and stupidly didn't get his armor because I forgot to put him in my party, oh well), Wyll left me when I attacked the Grove (I assume he died offscreen or I killed him without noticing) and I never even met Halsin so he also just died offscreen.

I could also rant about the whole "evil playthrough cuts you from 20% of the content" aspect, but that is a tired rant. I don't mind the grove massacre being the price you pay for Minthara joining your party (she IS an evil character, she straight up agrees with all evil actions together with Astarion and is totally on board with dominating the Absolute and becoming rulers yourself), I just wish there was some alternative with playing on the more evil side.

Maybe befriend goblins? More drow? Anything, really? Then again, BG3 is already a massive game... Oh well, you can't have everything.

Anyways, now that I have done the first big quest, I went to the Underdark to try out one specific thing:

What happens if you sacrifice Gale to the fish people before Elminster stabilizes the orb?

He aggros, you kill him and then after two in-game days this happens:

Needless to say, I reloaded a save and just humored the fish people without killing Gale. Besides, for a corruption arc he needs to live. This is also why I only indulged the "big" durge reactions...

My personal philosophy is that being a murder-hobo is a boring way to be evil (death is not the worst thing that can happen y'know), I much rather would corrupt characters.

However, another part of me got curious about one thing: if you bite off Gale's hand when you find him in the portal, can you present it at the murder tribunal in Act 3?

Anyways.

Remember I said Astarion really gets the hots for durge? So, Minthara leaves for Moonrise so she isn't in my party at the moment this happens... durge decided to have some "fun".

This sequence was very corny, but I know it's all part of Astarion's play-pretend so I just let it play out. Spoiler alert - I will friendzone him later (for his own good).

I decided to feed durge the Noblestalk to get some memories/lore. I hoped for more but probably getting everything back in Act I would be anti-climatic, so this was a nice tidbit all the same. Also the environment bugged out, I should be in a dark dank cave, not outside.

Gale also decided he likes me. I promptly friendzoned him. Trust me, Galey, you do not want a romantic adventure with this tiefling (also he is soulbound to Nila, my other Tav, can't have him cheating on his wife...).

Anyways, Gale is a funny case because Larian keeps mucking up his romance flags, I couldn't replay his romance scene with my actual Galemancer Tav, but the romance does trigger later in Act I when you farm some approval (so either in the Underdark or Creche, depending which path you go on). But it also bugs out (I had to long rest twice with my Tav as the first time it triggered tiefling party dialogue before promptly cutting out, probably a bug because it was an old save where the romance SHOULD have triggered during the party).

Anyways, moving on. I am jumping over some zones/quests because nothing particularly interesting happened (I helped the Myconids but I do that always so that's that, though I let Glut die while fighting the Duergar, not on purpose he just got felted, sorry big guy).

Siding with this guy has exactly zero payoff (Act II spoiler - Balthazar turns him into a zombie and that's that), which is another evil run gripe. He is like Minthara where you can convince him to go against the Absolute, but instead it just goes nowhere apparently.

I just sided with him and suffered through killing a bunch of gnomes and Duergar. Well, at least I got some new scenes.

Astarion flirting interlude:

I put this here because the durge evil face is just so funny. These two would make a disaster pair, but, alas, we in this house are women-loving-women.

So, remember me setting out to push Lae'zel towards loyalty to Vlaakith?

I went as far as to stab the Dream Guardian...

Obviously I should have known better, because the Guardian has plot-armor for obvious reasons. This game kinda sorta railroads you to go against Vlaakith/side with the Guardian. Otherwise the game would just end for obvious reasons... So I decided that I might just shelve Lae'zel along the way.

Maybe I should have made some other decisions in later acts (like killing Voss), but I had my companion-squad already with me, so I decided to let it go.

And that concludes a "brief" overview of durge Act I:

[etirabys]

maui night 3

No amusing drama to report today. I snorkeled with the giant, moved onto my fourth Stephen King book in four days, and had a three course meal at an amazing restaurant where I kept drifting away from reality. I've been spending so much time reading fiction that I feel like a kid again. I'm half in another world.

My parents are wealthy, and I'm indefinitely unemployed. Occasionally I wonder how these things will collide near the end of their lives. Just once, my dad tried to use the potential inheritance as the carrot to get me to do something that I didn't want to do, and I told him he wouldn't get me that way. It was true, in part because I discovered it was true and in part because I willed it to be true. He was hurt by this, although I was trying to communicate something complicatedly loving – that I wasn't holding up my end of our frayed relationship for the money. I think there's a good chance I won't see any inheritance, and when I simulate that, there's an amputated stump where an emotional reaction might reside. I imagine my sister calling me and saying "they left it all to me" or "they left it all to the church" and I just shrug, blank. Who knows if that'll be how I feel if it really happens. Greed is a potent transformative force.

My parents were poor in different ways in a poor country, and one thing I have never doubted in my comfortable life is that money matters. I found lucrative employment out of college, and then disappointed myself by not taking the common-in-my-social-circle pledge to donate 10% of my income to the charities estimated to decrease the most suffering per dollar. I increasingly needed Ritalin to defend myself from indifference to all tasks, and Ritalin increasingly made me sick. I told myself I'd take the pledge if my employment felt stable. It never did, so I never have.

I know I'm not giving back what I should. There's a moral dislocation in me because I don't donate, an alarm that has not stopped going off in a room down the hallway. But I'm more selfish and afraid than I am moral. I check my bank account and recalculate years of runway. I anticipate catastrophic medical bills, divorce, having severely disabled children. I'm afraid of losing luxuries I'm accustomed to – buying e-books without pausing to think about it, getting to be the chill guy who says "don't worry about it" when people break my stuff, traveling, takeout.

This is an odd little pyramid of priorities. I care more about having money than I care about satisfying one of my more persistent imperatives to be a good person. But apparently, more than either of those things, I care about having an emotionally authentic relationship with my parents. This absolutely amazes me, because the emotionally authentic relationship I have with them is dogshit. I draw boundaries they think are ridiculous and guard them like a rabid animal, I don't make a strong effort to hide my contempt or amusement when they do something that elicits it, and I share almost nothing about my interior life with them.

What exactly am I trying to do here? I value money and I'm not shy to myself about it. Why not be nicer and hope for payoff? Why this spectacular irrationality? One answer is that it threatens my independence. I want them to have no say over my important life decisions. The other answer is that I'm not a daughter that makes them happy to have, but using them would not just make me a displeasing one – it would make me a bad one.

(The answer to 'why not just be nice for its own sake?' is that I hate them and don't want to be nice. During the occasional interactions that get nasty, these days, I keep my cool largely because I'm buoyed by the hope that this might be the fight that's bad enough to justify breaking off the relationship for good.)

I'm bleakly amused at the ranking that falls out of my revealed preference:

not being nice to people I hate > filial piety > material greed > morality

[repo-net]

Honestly Q-Taro was a very realistic character. In these kinds of death games or life or death scenarios you have to look out for yourself the most if you want to live. Sacrificing yourself for someone you just met is not as easy as people think.

YOU GET IT. YOU GET IT.

BRO IM TELLING YOU A GOOD FUCKING NUMBER OF THE PEOPLE THAT SAY Q-TARO WAS A BAD PERSON DIDN'T PLAY THE SAME GAME AS ME

He's real. He feels authentic to me. He's not positive enough that he believes everything will go right and they can take on anything. But he's also not a downer of a character that just makes you wanna drag and skip the game because of everything they say and act.

Spoilers ahead for the game, yeah? Don't read ahead if you haven't seen it through.

Q-Taro earned my respect the fucking moment he stepped in and questioned Keiji, a grown ass policeman and adult why he was okay with letting some random high schooler like Sara wield a gun instead of literally any of the responsible adults there.

It was reinforced even more when Q-Taro suggested in the first main game that the supposed ones with the weakest resolve and the ones who don't want to prove themselves to be of worth to the group should be voted out instead of anyone else, to which he rightfully suggests Gin, Kanna, and Nao. He wasn't wrong there. He made a fair suggestion.

HECK, HE EVEN BACKS IT UP BY OUTRIGHT SAYING TO REKO THAT IF SHE THINKS HE'S USELESS, THEN SHE SHOULD VOTE FOR HIM AND SHOW HER OWN RESOLVE. THAT'S WHAT HE'S TALKING ABOUT. AND HE GETS VISIBLY UPSET WHEN KANNA IS OKAY WITH BEING VOTED BY EVERYONE ELSE. BECAUSE HE WANTS KANNA TO STEP UP FOR HERSELF. HE'S JUST TRYING TO GET THEM FIRED UP AND ENCOURAGE THEM.

And don't even get me started on 2-1. I get why people would be mad about him sacrificing everyone else in the bad ending where he puts in 200 me-tokens into the vending machine. I get that. I also understand why Q-Taro would do it, it clearly left a heavy feeling in his chest and he regretted it. That wasn't the right thing to do. But I don't blame him for it.

AND I SURE AS HELL DON'T BLAME HIM EITHER FOR NOT WANTING TO GET SHOT BY POISON IN THE FINAL ATTRACTION? HE'S SCARED OF DYING. THAT'S A PERFECTLY GOOD REASON TO NOT PUSH THE BUTTON.

AND HE STILL DOES SO ANYWAYS WHEN GIN'S ABOUT TO TAKE A THIRD SHOT FROM THE MACHINE. HE CLEARLY FEELS BAD ABOUT LETTING GIN TAKE THAT MANY SHOTS. ANYONE WOULD FEEL BAD ABOUT LETTING A POOR KID LIKE GIN TAKE DEADLY POISON LIKE THAT. IT'S A NORMAL REACTION.

AND IT'S STILL A NORMAL REACTION TO BE SCARED OF SACRIFICING YOURSELF TO SAVE ANOTHER PERSON. THAT'S NORMAL. THAT'S REAL.

God I love Q-Taro so fucking much. This fandom did him dirty and misunderstood him harder than any other character in this damn game. Q-Taro deserves a fucking apology from the people that slandered his glorious name and I will not let any of this hate stand.

Not all of them are like this, but so many of the people that hate him for what he did would never admit it, but you know damn well in their heart that if they were put in the situation that baseballer was in, you would've done a bunch of the same shit he did in that game.

I'd talk about Chapter 3 Q-Taro in here, but I feel like that was when this fanbase actually finally started to realize how good he actually is as a character, so forget it, you all know how awesome he really is now if you've played up until then.

i mean, of course i will, if you still dislike q-taro in spite of all this (and chapter 3 q-taro as a whole, really.), then that's fine, it's your opinion and these are all just characters at the end.

but one thing is for certain. i am a q-taro burgerberg defender for as long as im alive. q-taro burgerberg owns my heart and soul.

MUSCLE. GORILLA. SOLOS.