#so mike is just like ok fuck it!! and starts flirting like crazy and will is like WHATS HAPPENING

[whynotimtired]

Thinking about how there was like half a day where mike knew it was requited....

[andydrysdalerogers]

Sliding Into Home - A Frank Adler AU

Pairing: MLB!Frank Adler x Abigail Hernandez (OFC)

Synopsis:

After a trade from Boston to Los Angeles, first baseman Frank Adler would seem to have it all. Money, women, an amazing niece, yes Frank should have it all. Except for one thing. One thing that left after a mistake five years ago. Los Angeles should be the chance to start over. Except she is supposed to be in Boston. Not his new medical director.

* A Frank Adler AU x Major League Baseball Story**

Warning: ANGST (i can't stress this enough), second chances, cheating, eventual smut, slow burn, drug use, abandonment issues, betrayal, domestic violence (i may have missed some), flashbacks

AN: This is my new series I'm starting next week! I hope you all will like this one. Tagging my usual tag list but please let me know if you would like to be added or removed!

Taglist: @patzammit @firephotogrl74 @texmexdarling @slutforchrisjamalevans @jennmurawski13-writes @tinkerbelle67 @before-we-get-started @bunnyforhim

Master List and Preview below:

Frank was looking at a Los Angeles icon, Dodger Stadium.  It was his new home, his new team and hopefully his new life.  He asked a security guard where to go and was met at the door by an assistant.  She was a shameless flirt, commenting on Frank’s forearms and his tattoos, cooing about how good of a player he is.  There was zero chance of Frank being interested.  His Friday Night adventures were reserved for road trips only. His one-night stands worked out just fine, in his opinion.  

As he was guided into the conference room, Frank was met with the president of operations, Nick Stanton. “Mr. Stanton.” 

“Frank! Good to see you again.” He shakes hands with Frank. “We’re waiting for everyone so can I offer you a drink?” He gestures to Frank to sit at the table. 

“Just a cola, thanks.” Frank took the seat next to the head of the table.  

“How was the move?” 

“Smoother than I thought it would be. Mary, my niece, threw a couple of tantrums but between me and my nanny, we managed to get her here.”  

“Nanny?” 

“Oh yeah, Scott, he’s great. He was willing to move with us, which is great since Mary seems to only listen to him.” Frank chuckles. “Who would listen to your uncle/pseudo father?” 

“I remember that story,” Nick replies. “You are brave to take on a baby right after bring drafted.”  

Frank shrugged. “Its not that big of a deal. You would do anything for family, especially Mary.”  

More voices float towards the conference room and Frank stands as he sees his agent and lawyer walk in and shake his hand. Then the general manager for the Dodgers comes in, making small talk with Frank.  

“Ok, I think we are just missing the team doctor and our legal team,” Nick tells everyone. “Its not Natasha, she’s busy with another client.  She’s sending in their new associate.”  

Frank just nods as the GM goes over the training schedule and when he would meet the team.  The conference room door opens and Frank turns to see and his stomach drops. He feels himself become clammy and pale. Because this shouldn’t be happening.  

Fuck.  

He looks at the brunette that walked in.  

she’s definitely not supposed to be here.  

What the FUCK! 

Abby Hernandez, his ex-girlfriend, love of his life, walked into the room.  

It Doesn't Stay In Vegas

The Future is West

Are You Sure We Aren’t Going Crazy

You Were Enough; You Are Everything

Fastballs and Fiancés

You Left Me

Take Your Niece to Work Day

Don't You Know How to Spell Assume?

Wanna Feel Safe Again

Maybe I should Have Ducked?

When It All Falls Apart

WTF Just Happened!

D N A: Diane Nicole Adler

Not Just a Pretty Face

It's A Ruff Life

Status: All Star

Since When is Ice Cream Evil

On the Hunt for Mike Weiss

The Next Adventure

A Bump in the Road

Unexpected Surprises

For Reasons Unknown...

Evidence, Emotions, Whatever

Trial By Fire

The One With the World Series

Oh Captain! My Captain!

Finale

[lucysarah-c]

Are you ready for ERWIN AND MIKE TRAINING CADETS HEADCANON EDITION?! YES?! OK, HERE WE GO!

Erwin was short, not that muscled, couldn't grow a bear for his life depending on him and was those nerd awkward kids that you think "this kid will never get pussy"

Thank god puberty hit him harder than the colossal titan to wall Maria. But he was a late boomer though, around his 17-18. Therefor, he had stretch marks on the bottom of his back because this kid like grew like crazy when his time finally came around.

Mike? he was the complete opposite, this kid was 12 and looked like 20 lmao. He was already tall like a mountain, thick like the walls, hairy like bear. He was the girlies dream as a cadet, pussy he wanted, pussy he got. He was the Reiner of his promotion, every girl wanted him and every guy wanted to be him.

Mike was what my mother would call "American's boyfriend", all the girls of the continent were his girlfriend at some point. He slowed down later on.

Erwin and Mike shared bunk beds and I think that at the beginning they didn't really get along. You know? Like Mike didn't pay any attention to the strategy/theory classes but was a genius on the 3DMG (Let's not forget that Mike was humanity's strongest soldier before Levi showed up). On the other hand, I feel Erwin as a kid/pre-teen kind of thing was those kinds who want to get along with the professors who do everything legal and correct until they had this magic moment where they realize they can get away with stuff. Plus, Isayama said that Erwin was in the top ten of his promotion but he wasn't that good at 3DMG. So Erwin want classes on 3DMG to get better and Mike needs to write an activity report that doesn't seem like written by a dog. When they began to work together, the friendship started.

Erwin is jealous of Mike, basically any girl he has a crush on only gets close to him to ask if Mike is available. Mike is ALWAYS asking him if he can leave the room and Erwin wants to sleep to be productive.

Let's jump when they stopped the training and carried on to the scouts, they share a bedroom. Erwin isn't a clean freak like Levi but Mike passes the limits, the new black plague grows in his bed. Erwin is always complaining he's the only one doing "all the chores, what will you do the day I decide to leave"

"You sound like my mother, Erwin"

Nile was the third one in the team and their betray to change to the MPs felt personal for the two. The three of them used to share rooms.

Ok, you remember I told you Erwin grew up all the sudden? ok, it took him awhile to get used to the attention before becoming the handsome charming smooth talker he's as a commander.

Mike would hear a girl talking to Erwin, see his clueless friend used to not being the girls attention and having to write him in a tissue from across the bar "she's flirting"

When it was Erwin's time to finally want the room for himself, Mike is a gossip little bitch. He wants to know all in return, how was it? how they did it? what they did it? which positions? This man was shameless, he would ask it in the middle of the corridor making higher-ups turn around with a smirk on their face and Erwin is a dying mess.

Each single bad idea originally was Mike and Nile the, as I told you, Erwin began to realize he could smooth out his way out of everything and oh boy. He planned the biggest scape plans and they never got caught.

It took Mike months to convince Erwin that Marie, the girl that Erwin has had a crush on for years, is finally showing interest and he's not making it up in his mind.

Definitely a toxic roommates relationship, Mike is just too laid back for Erwin in some aspects and Erwin is too obsessive for Mike. They 100% flighted way less once each got their own room lmao.

Once to make up, Mike searched for Erwin and said "It's a shame when we fight but a miracle when we fuck," being all goofy doing the regular "gay jokes between guys". Erwin looked at him completely done and said "Mike, the commander is in the bathroom he probably heard you,". The entire higher-ups of the scouts back the laughed about it from months in the meetings.

Erwin used to do kind of like "internships" to get his hands on legal and court themes more with Zachary. So when Zachary and Mike hangs out they make fun of how "cute and nerdly" Erwin used to be and how he shouldn't get cooky because they can always tell the rest. Erwin just role his eyes but he's secretly ashamed lol his modern au probably erased his teen pictures after his glow up.

Erwin isn't really good at holding alcohol but he's really good at pretending he does. Mike is all the opposite, he's better at holding it but once he's drunk he looks drunk and he acts drunk.

Mike and Nile once dared Erwin to use his "monitor" pass to go to the female barracks of the scouts, joking that he had to stay there for half an hour without getting caught by a girl. ... didn't come back in the entire night, the next morning Mike found him sneakily taking a shower and made fun of the hickey he had for weeks. Saying stuff like "I didn't know there were vampires in the female barracks "

Mike is one year and half older than Erwin, he joined with almost 14 years old the training grounds because his family had a farm and it was a rough year the one of his 12 and his family needed his help around. Good mommy boy.

[luxshine]

Chapter Nine begins and Mike is an idiot immediately.

I REALLY dislike Mike. He's not my most hated character, but of the main group? He's the one I wouldn't mind feeding to a demo-dog.

And Eleven is a jerk to Max for no reason except writers really can't write a group with two girls in it without making them fight for a boy. UGH.

Billy flirting with Mrs. Wheeler was very uncomfortable. I am back on wanting him to die.

Steve just plain out said that he'd rather be babysitting Mike than having Nancy around. Good boy. Please keep remembering that for future seasons, as Nancy is a terrible girlfriend.

Why is El interested in Mike? I mean, yes, he's like the first boy she met and the first one to be kind to her but really? That's a disgusting trope. Let the girl meet other people before shoving her into a romance.

Hooper needs a parenting manual. Well, we all do, but Hooper right now? Is in urgent need of it.

Gotta give it to Billy's actor: You can hear the slurs he's not saying when he's yelling at Lucas. Seriously, he can't die soon enough. Why did he have to survive to chapter 9 and not Bob?

I LOVE that Steve is only a capable fighter when he is defending the children and only started losing when Billy cheated. As I said, the pokemon evolved! (I am going to end up drawing that, ain't I?)

Max RULES. I've said that Dustin is the owner of the only braincell of the group and that is true. But Max? She has her own brain and her own set of braincells and more courage than all the gang combined. I love her. I really hate that El dislikes her just because of the idiot girls must fight for a guy trope. And she drives like crazy! I really, really love her as a character. She deserves a better group of friends.

The fact that the kids disobeyed Steve but STILL took him with them, so nice. Even if he was going to yell at them.

I can see that Joyce does not fuck around when it comes to revenge. I like that in her too. People should listen to her more often and not just ignore her instincts.

I was joking about Steve being Dustin's pokemon but.... he kinda is. Dustin just... tells him to do things and Steve goes with it. I love that. Such an interesting arc, especially when Nancy is not around.

That last scene with Dart? Adorable. Pity Dustin couldn't keep a demodog as a pet to go with his Babysitter paladin.

WHY is Bill still alive?! I wanted him DEAD not Bob.

But Steve as Dustin's ride? Melt my heart damn it. To think a year ago he was his main bully, and now he'd die for him.

And Ok, Nancy won me a bit by dancing with Dustin. See, if she could get her threesome polycule in order, they'd be amazing parents for Dustin.

... Did they really used the Psycho Stalker song for Eleven and Mike's first dance? Like, REALLY?! Do they know what they did or were just... that dumb? (Although given her nickname for him, it was fitting it was the song to Max and Lucas's first kiss)

Ok. The series won me over this season in a way season 1 didn't do. Mostly by not cribbing every note from Stephen King's books as they did in season 1 and by giving Steve an amazing arc and character development. So... let's see if season 3 holds.

[thefanficmonster]

Quarantine On Crack...yet again

PART ONE 

Until Dawn Gang + Reader (Female)

Warnings: Swearing, Underage Drinking, Shameless Flirting

Genre: Crack, Humor

Summary: Time to check on our favorite gang who are still quarantined together and have still surprisingly not murdered one another. The lodge is still intact, which is promising. And everyone still has all seven of their limbs. How long will this simulation of peace last for is the real question.

Requested by my dear Until Dawn Anon who I haven’t heard from in so long 🥺 Hii dear! I have missed you tremendously! Here we are again to witness the craziness of our babies and I hope you’ll join me on the rollercoaster once again! Sorry it has taken me so long to write the long-ago-promised part 2 to the crack fic but here it finally is! Hope you enjoy it! Love and miss you, Vy ❤

“Alright folks, the delivery has arrived!“ I announce as Josh, Sam and I stumble through the front door of the lodge, each one of us carrying large boxes of food and toiletries. Bless the Washingtons for still sending us food, if I were them, Lord knows I’d either forget to do so or simply not do it because I didn’t feel like it. Hey, I’m not saying I hate these people, I’m just insinuating that they would not among my priorities had I been the one responsible to send them food. They should be in that case - but I’m being very honest when I say they wouldn’t be.

“Finally!“ Jess and Emily are so in sync for two people who supposedly can’t stand each other, it’s scary. Not that I wasn’t already scared of them to begin with. I just have a hard time dealing with them. But they are good in bed so I keep them around...

“What do you mean ‘finally’? We still have food from last week.“ Matt points out, a slight frown on his face when he lifts his head from the book he’s reading.

“We ran out of coffee capsules, duh!“ Jess says as though she’s addressing the most obvious thing to a person with very low IQ.

Matt does the smart thing of rolling his eyes and returning to his book. Speaking of which, I’m sending another blessing to the Washingtons for having the GRAND library here. I know I would’ve gone nuts and murdered half of these bitches if I didn’t have a book or two to keep me busy. That’s how things are with me, I either have a book to read or I’m committing a murder rampage. No in-between, at least not with these people.

The sound of footsteps coming down the stairs attracts our attention. Mike, Mr. Golden Boy comes down the stairs and plops down next to Jess, wrapping his arm around here, “There better be some beer in there.” He winks at me. Yeah, that’s Mike alright - has his arm around one girl, winks at another.

“I swear to God, if you two try to have a sword fight with empty beer bottles again, one of you is getting sent to the cabin.“ Josh warns us, taking on the parent role for once.

“Whoa there, Dr. Phil! Send us to the ranch next, why don’t ya!“ I roll my eyes at him, seeing his expression beg to change into a smile at my joke while he’s trying to maintain his no-funny-business look.

“Can we go unbox these things already? My arms are dead by now.“ Sam complains and doesn’t wait for an answer from us as she takes off with a rather fast pace towards the kitchen.

Josh and I are quick to follow. Much to my dismay, in order to reach the kitchen, we have to pass by where Emily is sitting. Since I haven’t already put in a request for a restraining order against her, passing within grabbing distance of her is risky as all hell. But you know me, I love risks. Passing in front of her I get ballsy and even give her the finger as I go. 

“You’ll regret that, Y/N! You’ll fucking regret it!“ She calls after me in teasingly threatening manner that almost makes me chuckle, however I keep my features as still as the ones of a statue and I don’t turn back around.

Sam and Josh have already cut the boxes open and have started moving the products from the box onto the kitchen counter and island. I grab the box cutter from its spot near the sink and cut the box open as well. To Josh’s dismay but my incredible luck, there are indeed a few beer bottles in my box. I cheer silently as I take them to the cooler.

“You know, Sam...“ Josh’s voice interrupts the silence just as I’m about to close the cooler. I’m honestly intrigued by what he has to say to Sam, and eavesdropping might be wrong, but it’s not like the fuckers can’t see me standing five fucking feet away! - so I pretend I’m organizing the cooler so I don’t have to return to the center of the kitchen where the two of them are crouched by their packages. A quick look over my shoulder confirms that they are indeed having a *MOMENT*, one I wouldn’t want to interrupt.

“Yes, Josh?“ Sam responds, giving me an urge to go grab some popcorn before any more progression happens. I know these two have eyes for one another, but they are both massive hypocrites! The are doing the very thing they hold against Chris and Ashley: hiding their feelings. Since I’m Josh’s unlicensed and unpaid therapist, I have a bit more intel on what’s going on in his head. It’s basically: 30% what am I doing with my life; 30% I need a drink; 40% Sam. You’d be surprised if you knew how often he mentions her when he’s venting. I’ve encouraged him to make a move countless times but it’s like trying to talk me into not killing Mike - impossible.

“You could melt the snow outside.” It takes me all my might to hold back from facepalming. Oh God, if this is what he thinks I meant when I said ‘tell her how you feel‘ he couldn’t be more wrong.

“Ok, lovebirds!“ I have never been happier to hear Chris’ voice. He saved me the trouble of having to step in and end the awkwardness myself. I turn around with a what I hope is a casual and friendly and totally not distressed smile. Behind Chris stand Ashley and Mike. “Need any help?“

“Yeah, you guys could come in handy.“ I tell them, waving them over almost desperately, “Ok, one of you help me with the rest of the things in the box. The other two can organize the shit that’s on the counter.“

I duck back down to continue unboxing. There’s bags of dried fruit, tea, the coffee capsules Jess was talking about, some spices which I’m not sure why they’re there but I’m not complaining.

“Heard you needed help.“ Oh for fuck’s sake, Mike again. Why couldn’t it be Chris or Ashley, or Satan for that matter. I’m really not in the mood to be cleaning blood off the kitchen floor tiles.

I tilt my head to the side and it’s only then that I realize how close he is to me. My eyes immediately travel to where I left the box cutter. “Back it up, Michael, or....“ FUCK IT’S NOT THERE. I swear I left it there! Where the fuck is it?!

“Or what?“ He reads my confusion and holds up his hand that is holding the box cutter I’m searching for. I’m afraid the more time we spend under the same roof the more experience he’ll have in defending himself and disarming me.

“Motherfucker...“ I growl and grab the tea and coffee capsules and stand up, “It’s a pandemic, damn it. Six feet apart at all times, buddy. I wish you’d put a mask over that mug of yours too.“ I narrow my eyes as I look down at him, resisting the desire to kick him.

“Only if you were the mask.“ Oh this fucker...he even has the audacity to stand up and step closer. Why are the four other people not noticing this? Ok yeah, cause they don’t wanna be witnesses to the murder of their old class prez. I got it.

“Six feet apart or six feet under, Munroe. Your call.“ He cockily waves the box cutter, not as a threat but as a remainder that I don’t have a weapon. “Bold of you to assume I need that to kill you.“

“She could always snap your neck.“ Chris pipes in.

“Or poke your eyes out.“ Ash does too.

“Or strangle you.“ Sam adds.

“The latter doesn’t sound so bad...“ He smirks at me, earning himself mortified looks from the peanut gallery.

“I. Hear. FLIRTING.“ Jess’ voice cuts through the tension that has built up in the kitchen. Mike and I turn to the doorway simultaneously as well as every other head in the room.

There is Jess looking like a pissed off cartoon toddler - aka: my escape.

“And I hear the void calling me.“ I catch her off-guard and put the items I was carrying in her arms, “I better go see what it wants from me. Byeeee.“

I all but hightail it out of there. I mean, say what you want about Mike’s shitty personality, or lack of personality all-together, but the fucker’s got sexappeal. Not that I’d ever admit it or fall under its effects.

In the living room I find Hannah and Beth with no traces of Emily or Matt. I feel slightly relieved, to be perfectly honest. Seeing the perfect stress relieving opportunity, I sit down next to Beth on the couch and lie down, placing my head in her lap. “Hi!” I give her a cheeky smile.

“You’re the Devil.“ Beth mutters without giving me as much as a glance. I turn to wave at Hannah and that’s when I see the chess board set up on the coffee table. So that’s what she’s so focused on.

“Oh please, you’ll make me blush.“ I fake a giggle and blow her a kiss while she remains completely unbothered.

“Whatever’s going on over there - I DON’T LIKE IT!“ Josh says menacingly as him, Sam, Chris and Ashley enter the living room.

“ME NEITHER“ Oh no, that’s Emily’s voice. Her and Matt have just walked into the lodge after another stroll - they have those when they wanna make out in private. Speaking of making out, I don’t see Jess and Mike anywhere, much to my relief - one of them wants to kill me at the moment but they both wanna sleep with me too so you get why it’s a situation I’d like to avoid.

“No jealousy, guys, please. I love you all the same!“ I prep myself up in a half-sitting position to give them an apologetic but seductive look when a pillow whacks me in the face, “What the hell?!“

“I thought you loved me more!“ Beth barks back angrily.

Well, I’m in some serious trouble now. Not only is Beth DEADLY when angry, but she also has two siblings who are more than capable of kicking my ass.

“I do! I really do, Beth, I swear!“ My apologies are put to an end by another hit with a pillow. “You know I do!“ I sit up completely and turn to look at Beth who has turned the opposite direction. “Pwease?” I give her the best puppy-dog eyes I can pull of despite feeling utterly ridiculous.

“So you do have a favorite member after all? And it’s not me? Wow, Y/N.“ Ash glares at me as well, crossing her arms and also turning away from me.

“I SECOND THAT.“ Emily stomps her foot down and storms out of the room

Oh fuck.

“I do too, honestly. I’m really hurt, Y/N.“ Matt the person I can always trust to be on my side has turned his back to me in this time of need.

Oh fuck squared.

“You’re in some deep shit now.“ Hannah laughs almost evilly as she leans back in the armchair she’s sitting in.

“Josh, could you set something on fire again? Preferably me this time.“ I mutter with a monotone voice. I’d like to picture there’s a rain cloud above my head just pouring down on me. And zaps me with lightning every now and then for good measure.

“Nah, that’d be too easy on you.“ This motherfucker....

“Oh so you WANT me to tell a specific someone what you think and say about them when they aren’t around?“ I change the meaning of ‘death glare‘ with this look I give him. I’m sure that if I keep staring at him like this long enough I’ll burn holes into his skull.

After a few moments of still silence and intense glaring he finally breaks, “Alright fine, I’ll get the deodorant and lighter.“

I sigh in relief. I suppose there are worse ways to leave this world...

“No!“

“Don’t you dare!“

“No way!“

Beth, Ashley and Matt all jump up as soon as Josh gives any effort to stand up.

“Washington, I swear to God!“ There go Emily and Jess in sync again as they both enter the room armed. Jess is only in her underwear but we don’t talk about that. What’s important is that she’s carrying the box cutter from before while Emily is armed with a dull butter knife. Knowing how determined she can be, I wouldn’t underestimate her power due to the lack of sharpness to her weapon.

Josh is rightfully stunned by the sudden turn of events and sits his ass back down with hands raised in the air. I almost feel bad for him. Almost.

“Y’all love me!“ I smile at them, putting a hand over my heart.

Jess turns to me in a split-second, angry as fuck, and points the box cutter at me. “Y/N, I swear to God-”

“Alright, alright, alright...“ I too raise my hands in surrender.

This is how shit goes down over here. Just pure fucking CHAOS, a lot of drinking, flirting and sex jokes. And so much wondering how we’re all friends.

[dgalerab]

silverwolf3432 replied to your post “cute pizza delivery guy”

I need more of this it’s absolutely incredible

richie tells bev and stan about this encounter and they’re like “so basically a crazy person” and then when richie gets the request to deliver there again then he texts them like “YO THAT WEIRD HOT GUY WANTS TO SEE ME AGAIN” and stan’s immediately like “do not go, you WILL get murdered” and richie ignores him

meanwhile eddie is rehearsing the apology speech that bill and mike made him write down on paper bc they do NOT trust him to ad lib without making this worse and richie gets there and eddie has his long prepared speech and as he’s clearing his throat to deliver it richie is like “so did someone order extra sausage? ;)))))))” and they just stand there. staring at each other, and then eddie starts yelling at him about how he had this whole big apology and richie is ruining it by flirting??? 

and richie’s like “ok ok i’m sorry i really want to hear the rest of your life story” and they end up on eddie’s couch with eddie ranting about his entire life while trying to eat an entire pizza in one sitting (occasionally stopping to be like “wait should i be dabbing the grease off of this, it’s really bad for you? wait NO, FUCK that, this is greasy and i LOVE IT”) and richie just watching him in utter fascination like this is the weirdest lil dude i’ve ever seen, i love him

[richiefuckfacetozier]

Chapter 2: Funny Feeling

Story: Why Can’t This Be Love

Chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

Art of Eddie and Richie by @whatidoisxsecret

Located on Archive of Our Own

___

Eddie’s leg was bouncing up and down quickly as he sat in the semi-empty Thai food restaurant. Mike and him always had lunch at on Wednesday. It started after Mike’s dad died for a source of comfort. Not that Eddie felt qualified in any way to comfort someone after the death of a parent when he could barely remember his own father, but Mike meant a lot to him. He needed someone who would listen. Who would not change the subject because they were uncomfortable like Bill, or make an inappropriate joke like Richie, or avoid the topic of fathers altogether like Beverly had every right to do. Ben used to come before his big promotion, it had him traveling too much now. That left, Eddie, who would listen, nod, give some thoughts, but mostly just be there for Mike.

They kept up their lunch dates long after Will Hanlon’s death because it was special to them. If there were a couple of dishes they both wanted, they would get them and share. Mike always got a dessert that Eddie would mooch from. Spending one on one time with Mike was easy, never worrisome.

For once, Eddie was especially nervous today because he had to lie to Mike. Lying to his friends was not his forte. He knew how to lie or fudge the truth, it was an important ability he developed living under his mother’s strict roof. The question wasn’t whether he could do it or not but the guilt might eat at him.

This was all Richie’s FAULT. Last night when he suggested they be each other’s dates to Ben and Beverly’s wedding, Eddie was so caught off guard that he found himself agreeing. Well, not exactly saying yes, but he certainly didn’t say no. He told Richie he would think about it. The idea was actually brilliant, the only problem would be convincing their friends they were dating and not just using a loophole in the ‘Eddie and Richie must have wedding dates’ rule.

He wasn’t even necessarily nervous to pretend to be Richie’s date. In fact, he found himself a little exhilarated at the prospect. Their conversation about how to handle this didn’t get very far, but Richie said they would have to start dropping hints to the losers club immediately. It wouldn’t be enough to be each other’s date, they must convince everyone they liked each other as more than best friends. It was this part that sent him into a bit of a spiral.

“Sorry, I’m late!” Mike came flying into him for a quick hug, almost tipping him out of the chair, then sat across picking up his menu. Eddie looked at the tired, yet caffeine-fueled human in front of him fondly. Mike was a handsome and extremely good-hearted man. It always surprised him that Mike was single, but Eddie had a feeling he was looking for the kind of true love his parents’ possessed. Which wouldn’t be easy to replicate as the Hanlons were a beautiful couple.

“You’re fine.” Eddie waved him off. “I’ve just been suffering from the boredom of waiting for you.”

Mike rolled his eyes, “So much suffering. I bet you were texting Richie the whole time.”

“No, I wasn’t!” his eyes flashed in irritation. He hadn’t been, nevermind that normally he would be texting Richie. Right now he felt a little nauseous thinking about it. “My life doesn’t revolve around him.”

Mike laughed, “No need to bite my head off.” Eddie rolled his eyes but begrudgingly smiled.

“So why were you late?” Eddie asked.

“Boss needed me to show a new employee around the library.” Mike picked up the menu. “She seems nice.”

“Nice?” Eddie raised an eyebrow in surprise. His friend tended to be very private about people he might find attractive. It was vital he stayed cautious, if not also a bit nosy, when trying to ask questions. He hesitated then, “Are you interested in her?” Then immediately regretted it as that was probably too much too fast. So much for cautious.

Mike glanced over the top of his menu clearly debating how much to reveal. His dark eyes were steady with internal conflict. “Maybe? She’s a knockout that’s for sure. So how was dinner last night? Any new news?”

He nodded still wanting to push the subject further but he had the job of leaving hints about his own fake dating life. He considered how to do this then a crazy idea came to him.

Without meeting Mike’s eyes, Eddie started by saying, “Mike...I think I am gay.” He couldn’t believe he just said those words aloud.

A gasp and smile came from Mike’s lips, “Oh wow! I…” He was completely thrown for what to say. “Thank you for sharing that. How do you feel?”

“A little sick to be honest.” Eddie groaned. He should not have done that. It was a mistake. Suddenly, his breathing picked up in a telltale sign of a panic attack emerging.

“Hey, hey…that’s ok.” Mike reassured him gently, he reached forward to pat Eddie’s hand comfortingly.

“I told Richie too.” Eddie gasped out, breathing evening back out with his friend’s kindness. Silence ensued as Mike clearly tried to control his facial expressions. This was Eddie’s chance, he gulped heavily. “I’m happy Richie knows.”

Mike hesitated then said, “Oh yeah?”

Eddie nodded, “Ya know, because he’s...he’s Richie.” He’s my person. But Eddie didn’t want to say that out loud and offend Mike, someone just as important. “I don’t know how I am going to tell Ben and Bev when they JUST told Richie and me about this ‘Have to take a date to their wedding’ deal.” Eddie bit the bottom of his lip. “Thanks for not warning me by the way.” He said sarcastically, removing his hand from underneath Mike’s.

Mike opened his mouth to defend himself but the waitress swooped in to grab their food and drink orders. She gave Eddie a wink when he asked for his meal, which reddened his cheeks a bit in embarrassment. People flirting with him always made him uncomfortable. Except with Richie, he was the only person Eddie could laugh off the flirting easily. Most likely from years of dealing with it.

After she walked away, Mike turned to Eddie with a determined expression, “You had to know they would ask something like this of you. Stanley’s wedding was bad enough then Bill’s, you both need someone to rein you in.”

A spark of rage ignited within Eddie, he was always easily angered when pushed. “Those were rough fucking times for me! And last year was hard as fuck on Richie with the death of his dad. You should understand of all people.”

Mike’s lips pursed and he spoke very slowly, “I do understand, Eddie. But this day is about Beverly and Ben. They get to ask whatever the fuck they want from any of us.”

“It’s embarrassing, Mike.” Eddie’s voice was rising in pitch and volume as a familiar panic started to set in. “Forcing me to get a date and, in turn, now I have to come out to them to explain why the person I am bringing will be a guy. It wasn’t fair of them to put me and Richie on the spot like that! You knew! You should have said something.” As all of this rolled out of Eddie’s mouth, a crazy dawning hit him. He might actually...be...no...he can’t be. Can he?

Mike listened carefully before sighing loudly. He looked away from Eddie then back at him. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

Eddie nodded. “That’s all I wanted to hear.”

They got interrupted by the waitress coming with their food and drinks. The meals smelled incredible but neither of them touched their food. Mike clearly wanted to say more from the tense way his jaw twitched.

“I really didn’t think about it, Eddie. I’m sorry you were put in that position.” Mike gave the saddest expression that made his tired face look even more burdened.

Eddie was never able to stay mad at his friends for long. “You apologized. Good enough for me.” And almost as a sign of peace, Eddie reached over and took a spoonful of Mike’s Pad Thai. “So tell me about the library girl.”

Mike beamed at him. “Her name is Carole Danners…”

Eddie marched forward like a soldier ready for war. He got to the door of Richie’s apartment and knocked. There was a thump and yell from inside. Richie must have been napping then fell off the couch. Which made sense since he worked the night shift at the Radio station and did standup many nights.

Eddie was losing his resolve with every passing second. It was taking far too long for Richie to answer. His feet started carrying him away from the stoop then the door flung open.

Richie’s hair was messy, sticking out everywhere. Eddie was annoyed at how his cheeks warmed seeing Richie shirtless and wearing only boxers.

Now, he isn’t blind or an idiot, Eddie knows Richie is really good looking. He’s known the guy through braces, the growth spurt, his skin clearing and the mercy of puberty turning him into a beautiful man. Richie works out to keep fit for industry standards, he has a soft stomach from still eating junk and too much beer, his eyes are ocean blue behind stylish glasses, jaw defined, and overall unfair attractiveness.

Richie leaned on the doorframe with a smirk. “You going to stand there and drool over my sexiness or come inside?”

Eddie frowned, shoved past him and into the apartment. “I wasn’t drooling you turd. And you aren’t sexy, you’re a nerd.”

“So what do I owe the pleasure of your company, besides the obvious of enjoying your company always.” Richie plopped down on his couch and patted the seat next to him. Except Eddie didn’t feel like sitting yet. He went over to the record that was playing a Queen song. Richie always had music playing, he could barely go 30 minutes without some kind of sound surrounding him. It was particularly bad in school when he would finish tests quickly then bring out his headphones to try listening to something. Teachers hated it.

“I want to go as each others’ dates for the wedding.” He heard Richie get up from the couch, then a hand came on his shoulder to turn him around. Those blue eyes searched his own greyish-brown ones for a minute. The scrutiny made Eddie feel exposed, so he shrugged him off changing the record to a song by Aretha Franklin. “I’m serious. Whatever it takes for us to go together, I will do it.”

This seemed enough for Richie. “Fuck yes! This will be so fun.”

“It won’t be fun to lie.” Eddie groaned.

Richie ignored this as he said, “We need to plan. It has to be convincing. Some of our friends may not believe us.”

“I told Mike I am gay.” Eddie blurted out. Richie’s eyes widened in shock, which looked huge behind his thick glasses. His big mouth opened in a dumb gaped way, “And he fucking believed me which I feel says something about me that I am not sure I want to tackle at the moment.”

“Oh shit,” Richie laughed and gave an air of completely impressed. “No, you fucking didn’t!”

“Yeah, I fucking DID. He sat there and was proud of me.” Eddie paused. “Richie, do I give off gay vibes?”

“Er…” Richie shifted from one foot to the other, while rubbing the back of his neck. “How should I know?”

“Bowers used to call us faggots all the time…”

“Eds, that was just one of the few words in Bowers’ vocabulary. You can’t possibly take it seriously.”

Eddie studied Richie for a second longer. “You're probably right. I’m overthinking this.”

“Definitely. No more thinking.”

“You do enough lack of thinking for both of us," Eddie stated, to which Richie barked out a laugh. "Ok. What do we do?”

Richie frowned in confusion, “What do we do what?”

“About pretending to date!” Eddie felt small and vulnerable. This situation was not ideal for him, either of them. He couldn’t put his finger on exactly why so many hang-ups were emerging, him and Richie messed with their friends all the time. This felt different, more dangerous, disrespectful maybe or...too real perhaps.  

Richie must’ve sensed Eddie was in his head as he slung a long arm around his shoulders leading them to the couch.

“So, first we have to pretend to date,” Richie informed him. This reminder made Eddie grimace. Going as wedding dates was one thing but actively dating would be a challenge. “It’s the only way to convince them it’s genuine and not a trick.”

“Dating to go to one wedding together is risky, Rich. What if you find someone you are actually interested in?”

“Eds, you know my track record is all over the place. I’ve never held a girlfriend for more than a couple of months.”

“You dated Sandy for 3 years and lived with her for 2 and a half.” Eddie stated bitterly.

“Right, blocked Sandy out,” said Richie, obviously lying. He rarely ever brought her up and never talked about why they broke up. Eddie always figured she thought Richie wasn’t mature enough. Whenever the subject of marriage came up, he used to make a joke about them being too young or that she wouldn’t want to marry him. Until one day she stopped him in front of everyone and said she did want to get married so what did he have to say about that. They broke up the next day. Eddie never told Richie he was happy about that break up because he knew it wouldn’t go over well, but Sandy always tried to change Richie. To do that to the most immovable force in Eddie’s life was unforgivable in his book. “Anyway, don’t worry about me. But if you want to date someone within the next year, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

Eddie shook his head aggressively, “Definitely not up to actually dating someone.”

Richie placed his hand over his heart. “Hurtful.”

“Asshole.” Eddie grumbled and poked Richie’s forehead hard.

He rubbed the spot but smiled fondly. “I’ll be your practice subject for your future soulmate.” The sentiment didn’t reach Richie’s eyes. Probably because Richie doesn’t believe in soulmates or something.

“Alright,” Eddie took a deep breath, “Should we make rules?”

Richie ran a hand through his hair making it stick up more. “Like what?”

He fidgeted uncomfortably on the couch, he toed off his shoes, then leaned back bringing his feet up. “Like ‘If we start developing feelings, we end it.’.”

He couldn’t be sure but he swore Richie looked at his lips before saying, “What makes you think we will develop feelings for each other?”

Eddie stared at the small burn in Richie’s couch instead of his eyes. To this day, Beverly has never admitted that the burn is from her leaving a lit cigarette down for too long. Everyone convinced Richie he burned his own couch when drunk and trying to light up a cig. The lie has been going on since college, far too long, so none of the losers can ever tell him. It’s one of the only secrets Eddie keeps from Richie.

He decided to ignore Richie's question saying, "You make up a rule now."

"Er..." Richie thought for a little bit then, "‘Kissing in public to prove it is fine, but not in private’?"

"AND NO TONGUE!" Eddie insisted. "I used to hate when Myra wanted to french kiss. She of all people should know how many germs are in a mouth. More than a toilet!"

"Ya really had a rockin' affair there with Myra the hydra. Didn't ya, Eds." Richie was smirking.

“Also, ‘We cannot tell anyone or any of the losers no matter what’.” said Eddie with a bit of warning tone thrown into his voice.

“I’d be more worried about YOU not being able to tell anyone.” Richie lightly hit Eddie’s leg. “You’re the one who can’t keep a secret for shit.”

“I haven’t told a soul that you were my first kiss at 11!” Eddie argued.

“Yeah, cause it’s embarrassing as fuck. Actually, we can have that be an anecdote now!” Richie said excitedly. “Thank god, that secret was fucking eating me alive.”

Eddie laughed a belly-busting laugh. Richie had this way about him, he could diffuse the most awkward situations. Deciding to do this was about as awkward as it could get with them. When Eddie’s laughter subsided, he asked, “So how did we start dating? This is also weird because it’s going from secret dating to dating. We will need solid stories.”

Richie leaned back on the couch and thought about it for a bit. “Ok. I got it. We can literally blame it on Beverly and Ben. They forced us to bring dates, you come out of the closet to everyone which in turn gets me thinking differently about you. So I make a move and…”

“Why do you get to make the first move? And why do I have to come out of the closet to everyone?!”

“I’m more ambitious than you and you keep fewer secrets, so you have to come out first. Also, you already fake came out to Mike, so the rest should be easy.”

“But I’m bolder in my actions!” Eddie surprised himself with that one. But he was getting to know himself better lately, and one of the things he prided in was taking action when necessary. “Case in point, coming out to people, so I could’ve made the first move!”

“Fine. How about, we both drank too much one night and started making out but have no idea who kissed who first because we both just went at it. Sound good?”

“Yes,” Eddie nodded. “And...um...we didn’t want to tell anyone because we had no idea if it was a one-time thing or like something real.”

Richie bounced a little in his seat enjoying the storytelling. “AND! We didn’t want to ruin the friend dynamic without being sure it worked.”

Eddie’s stomach felt queasy talking about this. He wanted to be excited like Richie, usually, when they schemed he was all in, but this time he wanted to vomit. The stakes were so high. “Perfect. Alright, let's decide who finds out first.”

“Bill should catch us,” Richie suggested. “Everyone will believe him. Also, the look on his dumb face will be beyond fucking worth it.”

“Don’t call Bill dumb, Richie.” Eddie chastised. Richie rolled his eyes, which he let slide. “I agree about him catching us though. He’s most likely to confront the situation too. Ben, Mike, and even Beverly might keep it to themselves.”

“In general, we should drop hints like ‘I think I like someone but I don’t want to say who’ or ‘I’m hooking up with this cutie who has an ass you can slap day and ni…’”

Eddie smacked the side of Richie’s face with his foot, knocking off his glasses, “No jokes about my ass!” Richie hit him in the chest because he couldn’t see Eddie properly. Eddie launched himself toward Richie sitting on his stomach, knocking the air out of him. Eddie grabbed a couch pillow shoving it harshly in Richie’s face. He tried to fling Eddie off but couldn’t get a proper grip on him. He stopped struggling and tapped Eddie’s leg asking to be free.

Eddie paused realizing one flaw in the plan. He removed the pillow, hyper-aware of Richie’s hand still on his thigh but he should probably get used to the touching. “There is only one person I’m super worried about believing us.”

Their eyes met ominously as they said at the same time, “Stanley.”

___________

Notes:

Leaving me a comment gives me the magic to write moreeeeee. Or come say hi in my ask box. If you catch a typo let me know!

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[imaginingthebands]

More Than You Know part 6

CHAPTER 6

 CHRIS’ POV

 I set my phone on my nightstand and smiled. Persephone was so adorable. She was so nervous I wouldn’t be ok with little space. God I missed her. I could just imagine her trying to explain in person and trying to hide her face. Fuck she’s so cute. She is the most amazing woman I have met and I knew from the day I saw her that I needed to get to know her. I’m so glad I did. I’m glad things worked out how they did. Sighing, I got out of bed and made my way downstairs. Someone knocked on the door and I frowned. Who the hell could that be? Looking out the window I realized it was Ryan. “What’s up?” I asked as I opened the door letting him in. He looked nervous, “Dude how did you do it?” I raised an eyebrow, “Do what?” “How did you tell Persephone you like you and not sound like an idiot?” “Well, I didn’t really, she confronted me actually.” “What?” “Yeah, turns out when you show blatantly that you’re into a girl and then get hard just looking at them, they call you on it,” I chuckled. Ryan rolled his eyes, “Great so I am gonna fuck it up. We’ve been texting so much, and flirting but I don’t want her to think that I’m just some nasty band dude you know?” Nodding I replied, “That’s exactly what I feared. We haven’t know each other long but honestly, if you like Rose, just be straight up honest with her.” “What do I even say? I haven’t been this freaked to talk to a girl in years!” “Well, I can ask Seph what you could do if you want.” “She has to promise she isn’t going to tell Rose!” I thought about it all for a moment and ran upstairs to get my phone. Ryan followed behind and sat on my bed as I text Seph. “‘What does Rose think of Ryan?’” I said aloud as I typed. “But that’s so obvious!” he said. “Dude, do you want me to get Seph to help or not?” Ryan sighed and nodded. I hit send and waited. “They are inseparable. They talk about everything so Seph is going to know exactly how she feels.” My phone dinged and I opened the message right away.

She thinks he’s really cute and she’s super excited for him to come see her. She literally will not shut up about the man.  Ever since I showed her you guys last year, she has been in love with him. Why?

Ryan grinned as I showed him the message. “See? Just ask her out dude,” I said, putting my phone in my pocket. Ryan pulled out his phone just as he got a message from Rose. “Dude did she tell her?” he asked. I laughed, “Probably, they talk about everything.” Ryan groaned but then sighed in relief. “She just said can’t wait to see you tomorrow.” “You’re going tomorrow?” He nodded and started walking downstairs. “Yeah, but I’m take a plane cause I’m tired of driving and I get to drive first when we leave this time,” he shook his head. I couldn’t help but be a bit jealous. I wish I could’ve spent more time with Persephone, but she started her new job tomorrow.

I let Ryan show himself out of my house and walked to the bathroom. Turning on the hot water, I couldn’t help but smile as I noticed the small circular tub of conditioner that Persephone had left behind. She was definitely going to be sad once she realized she left it behind; it was her favorite one simply because it smelt like marshmallows. “I’ll have to surprise her with a new one,” I mused aloud to myself. With a few swipes through amazon, I found it and I set it to be delivered to her house in two days. Setting my phone on the counter, I undressed and stepped into the warm water.

Life was going to be very different now. Persephone and I had talked about things we wanted in a relationship, things we can’t stand, favorites of ours, religion, everything. It was crazy, but in the short amount of time we’ve had together, I really did fall fast for her.

My phone vibrated on the counter alerting me I had a text. Drying my hand I reached out quick to check.

Did you just send me my conditioner to my house?

Grinning I replied.

You left yours here, I figured you’d want it without having to drive fifteen hours for it.

You could’ve sent it with Ryan when he leaves to see Rose ya weirdo

Yeah I suppose. But where’s the fun in that?

Chuckling to myself, I set my phone back down and finished my shower.

As I tugged my shirt over my head my phone buzzed again. Persephone was so nervous about her job. I did my best to assure her that it would go great before heading to the store.

 PERSEPHONE POV

I smiled to myself. Chris was so sweet.

The sound of drunks filled the air as Rose pulled the door to the bar open. It was were I started my shift tomorrow night and I was nervous. But Chris had faith in me, and I knew the pay would be worth it. Mainly the tips from the drunk dudes who thought they stood a chance with me. I looked around and saw a group of men playing pool, some girls who looked like they were celebrating something, and some guys who were smiling creepily at them. Rolling my eyes to myself I sat up at the bar next to Rose who was already ordering her drink. I hung my purse on the little hook under the bar top and pushed my hair behind my ear.  The light in the bar made it an even deeper violet. “Let me guess, something like a lemon drop because we don’t know how to hold our liquor?” I looked up and saw a very irritated looking man. Smiling I said, “You must be the dick I’m replacing. I’ll take some two shots of cherry southern comfort thank you.” He rolled his eyes and walked towards the bottles. He walked back to us carrying two shot glasses of the amber colored liquid. He watched me as if he knew that I couldn’t really handle it. Picking up the first shot I slammed it without a problem. The burn rolled down the back of my throat down to my stomach. With a small, ‘tsk’, he slid the other closer. Rose smirked knowing what was coming. Picking up the glass, I poured the liquid back and set it down with a smile. “Can I have my lemon drop now?” Rolling his eyes, he walked away to make my drink. “Girl, does Chris know about this side of you yet?” Rose asked with a playful look in her eyes. Grinning I said, “He’s about to!”

Three lemon drops later, I stumbled outside with my phone. Scrolling through my contacts, I heard a catcall from behind me. Turning around there was some guy sitting on the bar steps I didn’t see before smoking a cigarette and smiling at me. “Fuck off,” I slurred. I put my phone up to my ear as I watched Rose pay for our drinks through the window.

“Hey Persephone, what’re you up to?” Chris answered. “Just leaving the bar,” I giggled. “Ahhhh, is Rose with you?” he asked, concerned. “Yup! She’s inside.” I could hear Chris laughing, “How much did you drink?” “Well the stupid bartender didn’t think I could handle whiskey so I had to prove that wrong! I had some.. then he gave me lemon drops!” I could almost see him shaking his head as he continued to laugh at me. “Well make sure you let me know when you two get home safe ok?  Ryan is going to be there tomorrow night and someone has to make sure he behaves,” he joked. Rose walked out of the bar holding out my bag and shaking her head. “Rose you’re the best! Chris I almost forgot my purse!” “I’m glad Rose got it.” “I’m hungry,” Rose said. My eyes widened, “Chris, I want something blueberry!” “Yeah?” he chuckled. I started laughing as Rose rolled her eyes and giggled. “I forgot to get doughnuts earlier!” “Well maybe you can get some delivered so you two can go home and sleep. I have a feeling you need to,” he said. “Too bad you aren’t here, I’d-” “I DON’T NEED TO HEAR WHAT YOU WOULD DO IF HE WAS HERE SEPH!” Rose shouted. “ROSE! I DIDN’T MEAN LIKE THAT!” I shouted back laughing so hard I snorted. Chris laughed at us, “You two need to go home for the night.” “We are,” I said as I stumbled towards the car. “Who’s driving?” Chris asked. I looked at Rose, “Shit we didn’t think about that!” Rose looked at me and put a hand on her hip, “You realize I had ONE mike’s hard lemonade and I’m not a light weight? I am no where near unsafe to drive.” “Rose can drive!” I smiled. “Make sure you drink water when you get back ok?” he said in a soft yet commanding tone. I saluted Rose and said, “Aye aye sir!” Chris laughed, “I’ll talk to you later ok?” “Ok Chris,” I said. We said goodbye and hung up. Rose took my phone and I climbed in her car.

Before I knew it, we were back at the house. Josh stood in the doorway shaking his head, “You are so wasted Seph.”  I smiled, “I know.” Walking up the path, I saw someone hiding behind the side of the house and backed into Rose as my heart beat faster. “Josh someone is hiding there!” I yelled as I pointed. Josh walked over to see what I was yelling about as the person walked out from where they stood.

“Ryan?! What are you doing here! You weren’t supposed to be here until tomorrow!” Rose squealed as she launched herself at him for a hug. “Well, I couldn’t wait to see you so I thought I might come sooner,” he smiled. He leaned down to kiss her. “OOOOOOOO!” I shouted. Rose flipped me off as she kissed him back. “Thank God you came out Ryan, I was about to punch you!” I said. Ryan laughed as he realized how drunk I was.

We all made our way inside and Rose walked me to my room, handing me my purse and phone. “Text your boyfriend so he knows you’re okay!” she said pointing a finger at me.

I somehow made out a quick message to Chris before falling asleep.

When I awoke the next morning, my head was pounding. Holding my head, I slowly climbed out of bed to the bathroom where I found a bottle of water and medicine with sticky note that had a heart on it. No doubt from Rose. I silently thanked her as I took the medicine trying to remember what the hell happened last night. Then it hit me. Whiskey. I groaned. Whiskey always made me forget what happened and that’s exactly why I never drink it. Damn that asshole for making me feel like I had to prove something to him.

Oh god… What did I say to Chris?

I raced back to my room looking for my phone. Somehow it ended up under my bed. I checked the messages between us and nothing made sense. Calling him, I bit my lip hoping I hadn’t embarrassed myself too badly. “She lives!” he chuckled. “What did I say last night?” I asked groaning as my head began to throb. “Oh just that you’re madly in love and want my babies,” he said in serious tone. My eyes widened, “Oh my god… I am so sorry…” He burst out laughing, “No, you just wanted something blueberry and went on about how much today was going to suck but that you stuck it to some bartender who thought you couldn’t shoot whiskey?” “That part I remember. That’s the guy I’m replacing and now I see why.  He’s got no customer service skills at all,” I laughed. “Rose said you almost assaulted Ryan because he scared you?” he questioned. “Oh God! Yes! I remember now! He was hiding by the side of the house and I couldn’t tell who it was and I was ready to fight after the initial terror of some creeper being there went away.” Chris chuckled, “How do you feel this morning?” “Like I got hit by a bus. I took some Excedrin but what I really need is sleep and pancakes,” I pouted. “Well you have an hour before you have to be to work so you have time.” “What?” “… You go in at four right?” I pulled the phone away and looked at the time. It was almost three. “Shit! Chris I gotta go and eat and get ready!” “I’ll text you later Persephone, have a good first day my love.” My cheeks burned as he said that. We quickly hung up and I raced for the shower.

Thirty minutes later, I had showered, stuffed my face, gotten rid of most of my headache and sat down to get dressed. As I sat in my bathrobe I sighed. “Rose?” I called. I heard two sets of footsteps before Rose and Ryan came in my room. Ryan’s face turned red and he walked out, shutting the door behind him as he apologized. “Outfit?” she guessed. I nodded and she made her way to my closet. After about a minute or two, she tossed a black crop top to me along with my favorite pair of black and white striped pants. She walked over to my dresser where I kept all my jewelry in the box on top and she began looking through it. “Here it is!” she exclaimed. Rose handed me a deep red collar with an o ring and my favorite rose plugs. “You are a life saver.” She raised an eyebrow and said, “Make sure you wear your fishnet top under that crop top. You’re welcome.” As she walked away we both giggled at the ‘Awkward’ reference. After I got dressed I began applying my makeup. Once I was satisfied that I looked hot enough to get good tips, but scary enough to keep the basic creeps away, I left for my first shift.

[sister-s-98]

A request from @thatrandomdreamer I changed it a bit but hope you enjoy! ✨💕👑

Angela’s POV✨

How can he be so perfect? His windswept hair falling over his face as he laughs about something or other with his siblings. I’ve heard rumours about him and Alice but I’m sure he’d love me. I heard he’s a real history nerd! I could talk about history for hours. Jessica says boys hate talking about boring stuff like that and that I should just try flirt with him. jessuca and I made a plan last night and I’m going to follow through no matter what it takes.

I pulled mr hair back neatly and pushed my glasses to the bridge of my nose.

I got my tray and walked towards the cullens’ table. I’ll ask him about Math cla-

*loud clattering sound followed by a thud*

Oh god! I’m an idiot. My knees fell onto the cold hard floor as I tripped on a small crack in the masonry. He turned rapidly to catch me and grabbed me by the arm “You alright?” He asked concernedly I nodded and noticed he had dropped his sandwich to catch me. “Sorry about your lunch!” God I had to ruin everything. “It’s fine wasn’t gonna eat it anyway darlin” he said in his southern drawl I always found odd.

That’s when my obsession started. Every lunch they never ate. It was the most fascinating phenomenon I’ve ever studied. The Cullen effect i dubbed it. They buy all this food lay it out and then dump it at the end of lunch. It was the strangest thing I’d ever seen.

I began logging their food choices in my notebook and their times of purchase. Over the weeks I noticed something. They bought, very strange foods? Bowls of coleslaw, an unreasonable amount of ham slices, the list goes on. It was almost like they were trying to one up eachother every day.

On a particularly dreary day I headed to the cafeteria to see Emmett, the biggest of the bunch. Clutching a plastic bag of whole eggs. With all due respect to the cullens. What the fuck?

That is one weird family.

Rob POV✨

(Rob is an OC and basically the average student at forks high school)

I wish I knew what Mr.Banner was talking about but he makes zero sense. If I have to do one more of his stupid assignments before the term is up I might just start skipping this class.

Right in front of me sits Edward. He’s a nice guy, not much help on the assignment front but he’s ok. At least that’s what I thought. He’s really into his girlfriend Bella. Like Reeealy into her. Like I can feel the sexual tension from their desk 24/7. He thinks he’s so slick holding her thigh and writing her notes. Wait until mike hears about this he’l go crazy.

I saw one of the notes before and he was talking about how beautiful her neck was. Like dude, that’s not what a chick wants hear. Unless she has some like totally freaky neck kink, mike will go crazy about that too.

[reelovesbennycolon]

Ok its just a little something that has came into my mind.just imagine you were flirting with TC and you didn't know that Michael was so upset that you didn't even see him there standing. You later go into hes office...well let me know what you will all think of it

It was 11:30 pm and i was absolutely tired from work, well the night shift takes a strain on me.then Tc grabs me by the hip ."hey sexy"he says. Knowing it was wrong of me to do this but i began to flirt with him "ooh hello sexy "and smiled at him.i touched hes chest looking at hes beautiful face.i was flirting with tc?but nonetheless...

We were actually flirting with each other and he kissed me.and my one big mistake was i...kissed him back.later when that little moment was over i went by Michael's office. I was about to give him a kiss but he was standing there in front of hes desk ,looking at me in a way he had never did before .he's eyes were black ,from anger.michael was clearly upset about something. "What the hell were you doing?"i was looking back at him,i know that Michael has a very bad temper, i was a bit puzzled by this question that he had asked me. "What are you asking me babe?" He was so upset. "You were flirting with tc.oh yeah by the way you two were kissing too huh?"he's eyes were filled with so much anger that it scared me "you...you saw that?i.."words couldn't come properly out of my mouth. For a few moments i took a deep breath ."it's not what it looks like Michael. It was just a crazy moment ".Michael grabbed me by the wrist "you should not flirt with tc like that.you know that i can't fucking stand the guy!"i was shocked by Michael's anger at me "Michael you are hurting me!"i yelled and took hes hand of my wrist. Then i slapped him.yes i slapped him.before i could even turn my back he pushed me against the wall and the intense anger was burning in hes eyes, it was so dark it scared me."don't you dare flirt with tc or any other man again, you are mine"and i felt my heart beating so fast as if it was about to jump out of my chest. I thought he was going to hit me but he punched hes hand against the wall.i got such a fright and started to cry.we looked at each other, standing there in absolute silence. "I...i an so sorry "he looked at me, the anger disappeared for a while. "I am the one that should be sorry Mike. I love you and you know that"my tears were falling down my cheeks. Then he pulled me close to him and held me tight.

Ps:there was a little bit of strong language but i hope that you all don't mind?and it might give all you brilliant fan fiction writers of the night shift/Michael ragosa character a idea to write more stories about him

This little story just came into my mind 😊.let me know what you all think about it ok?

@thesleepyproducer @captainofthebrokentides @tinysangel @niobechris @freddyfanatics

[ohmyohpioneer]

my best friend’s brother is also on this snowy vacation queliot headcanon:

So I just got back from a snowy vacation and I was a little winedrunk on the plane and I thought (and consequently typed) a truly idiotic headcanon. 

Quentin is invited (ok bullied into but with good intentions) last minute by his friend, Margo, to come on her big annual ski trip and even though he doesn’t ski because his parents never had the money he says yes because it feels nice to be invited and, well, he likes Margo. It can’t be that bad, right?

Except that it kind of can because he didn’t realize Margo’s older brother, Eliot, is also invited (why did this not occur to him because of course he is) until Eliot steps out of the car, all regal and long legs in a crazy expensive but ok pretty cute Canada Goose parka.

And he knows Eliot. It’s not like they’ve never met before. Which is kind of the problem because Quentin inexplicably just really likes him. I mean, yeah, he’s attractive, sure, but the last time he went to one of Margo’s parties they ended up talking and laughing for, well, a long time and it was all knocking knees and shared bottles of tequila. And Quentin–

But it’s all beside the point because Margo is a good friend and Eliot is off limits and absolutely unattainable for someone at Quentin’s level. Also potentially involved with that guy Mike - who has bad hair - regardless. Just. Not anyone he should be sweating.

And ok. Eliot seems delighted - which is not a word Quentin uses with any sort of frequency - to see him and gives him a hug. A big one. Like, the kind with great arm pressure? And a shoulder sniff? Fuck, Quentin is weird. God. Why can’t he be normal?

But of course Eliot is charming and immediately they’re all in the little rented chalet with hot toddys heavy on the toddy (assuming that’s the whiskey part), and he really needs to keep himself in check.

Quentin’s only frame of reference for ski lodges or ski culture or whatever is from movies, namely romcoms, and it seems exactly right that the rented chalet is tiny and there are only a few, cosy (the rich word for cramped) rooms and he ends up sharing a room with Eliot. It’s a bunk bed because sure. And Eliot immediately claims the bottom (“I am a top in all other realms” he smirks and is that flirting or just witticism?)

Josh and Margo and Penny and Julia all immediately go to the double and triple and quintuple diamond and rhombus hills (it is all utter nonsense terminology to him and maybe this is what people feel like when he talks Fillory) but Eliot stays with him while he rents skis and insists on joining him on the bunny hill (“It’s where all of the cute instructors are. All you have to do is ask about the french fry pizza technique and Marcel, who is here for the winter from Switzerland, is buying your après aperitifs.”)

Quentin falls. A lot. But Eliot laughs and picks him up and it’s sort of okay. But cold. People like this?

They call it early because “the chalet is calling, and so is an adequately made, intensely overpriced cocktail” (Eliot, not Quentin)

Somewhere around day three, with less falls and a lot of Eliot insisting he’s ready for at least one of the lesser diamonds, he starts calling him Q.

Quentin (Q) absolutely does not blush when Eliot cheers and hugs him in a clacking frenzy of skis when he makes it down his first real hill without so much as a stumble.

They’re all very drunk and playing the Forehead Game, pieces of masking tape stuck to their heads, names written in disorderly Sharpie letters (person, fictional or real rules: no you are not real, yes you can talk, yes you are animated, fine yes, you are the Brave Little Toaster, you cheater) when Josh and Margo start making eyes and not-so-subtly tell each other that Margo is Jon Snow and Josh is Kylie Jenner so that they can “sneak off” (stumble out of the room making out with disturbing vigor) to do whatever it is they plan on doing (subtle)

And Penny and Julia decide to go on a starlight walk or some uber-saccharine romantic beautiful thing

And then it’s just. Quentin and Eliot. And a lot of wine. In front of a cracking fire in a moonlit chalet and they slump even further in their chairs by the mantle and they’re talking about something so inconsequential and great (“Ugh. Margo usually has flawless taste in friends but Back to the Future III?? No one with any decency is allowed to like that movie, Q.”)  and fuck Quentin is giggling and they’ve fallen to the floor (“How can you have not read any of the Harry Potter books?”) and if his head lolls just a fraction closer to Eliot’s wild curls, it’s because of some sort of scientific, magnetic pull or something.

He’s pretty sure that Eliot is leaning forward, or maybe somehow the wooden floors have slanted, or-or the world has moved and slid him closer to Eliot - his face in particular. And lips. His lips are like just molecules away, and–

Penny and Julia. Back. Snow dusted. Glowing. In love or some shit.

He accidentally calls him El. It just happens when they’re both at the breakfast table drinking coffee one morning. (“Of course you like it black, Coldwater. All tortured 50s existentialist.” “Just shut up and pass me the butter, El.”) And Eliot doesn’t correct him, just smirks and sips daintily at his coffee (no sugar, lots of milk) and nudges the butter at him.

Quentin really likes the way Eliot says Coldwater. He just. Does.

It’s Vermont during ski season so there’s a giant snow storm. 

Obviously.

All that snow has knocked the power out. It’s getting increasingly cold inside the cabin the longer they’re without heating, and Penny and Julia Do the Brave Thing and venture out to see if they can scrounge up a generator or something to make this less miserable. Margo and Josh beeline for their room without a word and that’s that, apparently.

His bunk is fucking freezing.

He can hear Eliot on the bunk under him turning and turning. He wonders if he’s any warmer.

“Q. For the love of all things unholy, could you please get down here and help me generate some body heat before I go full Ötzi the Iceman. Not that a millennia of future generations wouldn’t benefit from seeing my beauty preserved in icy mummification- but I’m not that altruistic. Oh. And please bring all of the blankets you have.”

Eliot’s bed is. Really small. Well, it’s the same size as the top bunk, but with two people on it, it’s notably less spacious. Eliot is big spooning (as a verb), and Quentin is small spooning (silently freaking out), but it is really helping to keep the chill off. The four blankets Princess and the Pea style stacked on top of them probably aren’t hurting either.

Somewhere in the middle of the night, the heat must have kicked back in - or Penny and Julia had succeeded in their quest - because Quentin wakes, sweating, pushing off cover after cover after cover and Eliot has somehow lost his shirt (and Quentin quickly loses his shit), but mostly he just lays back down and doesn’t go back to his own bunk.

He wakes up again because there are lips on his shoulder.

Not like, random, disembodied dream lips. But specific lips.

Eliot lips.

It’s still dark outside.

Quentin had kind of forgotten that feeling? That one low, low in your stomach when you wake up in bed with someone, someone who is against you and kissing your skin and you feel warm and dazed and blissed the hell out.

But he definitely remembers it now.

And he turns and they are for sure, absolutely, 100% full-on making out now and it’s really small in this bed.

Somehow Quentin loses his shirt, too (Eliot is good at somehow misplacing clothing)

“Just making sure you’re warm, Q.”

“Yeah. Taking off my shirt is definitely helping.”

They wake up in the morning and it’s hot and sticky and the opposite of Ötzi and Quentin says so. 

Eliot agrees and doubles down.

They decide to stay in the chalet for the day while Margo and Josh and Penny and Julia spend their last day on the slopes. They drink hot chocolate with peppermint schnapps and Quentin hates it (the schnapps), but doesn’t tell Eliot, and Eliot loves it (burrowing into the couch with no clothes, but wool socks on, next to Quentin) but doesn’t tell Quentin.

“This hasn’t been that bad.”

[lenavonschweetz]

Let’s Play Pretend - Part 2

Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Synopsis: Requested by @finnofamerica - Bucky agrees to be your fake boyfriend for your brother’s wedding to appease your family.  There’s only one problem - you want him to be more than just a fake boyfriend.

Warnings: Fluff, fake boyfriend troupe, language, a sprinkle of angst, sexual situations, sexual tension, adult content, Big Family Shenanigans™️.

A/N: Here is part 2 of the Let’s Play Pretend Saga!  The flirting and blushing and overall fluffiness continues!  Let’s see what Bucky gets up to this time... Thanks again to 

A/N/N: I did my best to leave the reader’s ethnicity, weight, height, and overall appearance all very vague so as to not leave anyone out.  I hope it reads alright!

HUGE HUGE HUGE SHOUT OUT TO @thetruealphasmccall for being my AMAZING beta and saving me about 1/2 a million headaches. Bless. You.

Masterlist

Let’s Play Pretend - Part 1 || Let’s Play Pretend - Part 3

You barely slept a wink.

How could you when you were forced to share a full-sized bed with one of the hottest sexiest largest men you knew? 

Ok, well forced was the wrong word.  In fact, Bucky had offered to make a make-shift bed on the floor out of pillows and comforters.  ‘I’ve slept on worse, trust me doll.’  But you couldn’t let him just sleep on the floor like some animal!

But no, you just had to be the idiot who told him to get his cute little butt in the bed.  When he saw the blush on your cheeks and the way you could not meet his eyes, he just couldn’t argue.

Bucky took up most of the bed even though he tried not to.  Still, you ended up scrunched up on your side trying desperately to avoid any physical contact.  When your alarm finally went off, you practically shot out of bed and downstairs to down some coffee before you could spontaneously combust.

The rest of the house joins you shortly after you’ve finished your first cup, while you sat perched on the kitchen island like a child.  Bucky looks like absolute sex as he ruffles his bed head, yawning in his tight t-shirt and grey sweatpants - which you could definitely see through the soft material to the...morning’s effects on him. You almost fall off your makeshift marble seat at the sight.

Jesus, was everything about this man overwhelming?!

“Morning, Doll.  How’d you sleep?”  He asks with the whisper of a smirk like he had no idea that you spent the night trying desperately not to jump him.

“Like the dead.”  You deadpanned, voice even and low as your brothers soon followed the wall of a man.  You divvied out the coffees, knowing exactly how everyone liked them and not at all just trying to cover for the fact that you knew exactly how Bucky liked his (which was black) and had made it the second you came down.

“So what’s on the agenda for today?”  Mike asks as Gordon takes a sip of his coffee.  The groom shrugs.

“I normally just wait until Mom or Em tells me what to do.”  Masculine chuckles echo around the room, one, in particular, drawing your attention.  You loved when Bucky let go and smiled like this.  Like nothing in the world could take him down.  Not his past, nor the what-ifs of the future.  He was in the present, his smile reaching his sparkling eyes.  When he suddenly shifts his attention to you that smile turns to a smirk.

Shit.  Play it off, Y/N.  Just drink your coffee and look away.  He won’t call you out in front of your brothers...right?

“Yeah, what is the plan for today, boss?”  Bucky winks at you as he saddles up next to you.  Even with you sitting on the high island counter, he towers over you.  His large hand snakes around your hip and goose bumps explode across your skin.  When he begins to run his thumb in small circles on the skin, you tap the metal digits quickly with a glare.  He ignores the obvious ‘stop!’ in your eyes, continuing his ministrations as your brothers stand just paces away from you.

“I know the bridal party was going to pick up the cake and bouquets.  Oh!  And I think we're picking up our bridesmaid dresses too!”  You answer smoothly.  A feat for how hard your body is shaking being so close to his.  “I should get ready to meet them soon.”

“When’s the bachelorette party?”  Will teases.  Mike rolls his eyes, informing the youngest brother that the party was last weekend.  At that information, Bucky’s eyes find yours again.  It’s very disarming.

“You missed the bachelorette party?”  He asks with puppy dog eyes.

“Well, yeah.”  You chuckle at his crestfallen expression.  “I couldn’t exactly leave in the middle of Nat and I’s mission to go watch ripped men, dressed as something outrageous, strip with my extended family.  It was hard enough to get this week off for the wedding!”

“Well Doll,” Bucky’s tone is still playful, but you feel like there’s some truth behind his words.  “If you still want to see ripped men dressed outrageously strip for you, I am at your service.”

You shove his shoulder roughly with a laugh and hop off the counter to go get dressed.  You hope desperately that he doesn’t notice the blush on your cheeks when the thought of him stripping for you crosses your mind in vivid detail.

Emely is a ball of energy, especially in the morning.

And her wedding is not a small one.

You had prepared efficiently, polishing off the remainder of your second cup of coffee before the girls came to pick you up.  Your stomach was rather empty since you hadn’t trusted yourself to eat anything what with the way Bucky had your stomach flipping like crazy.  His comment about giving you your own private show still danced through your head as you squeezed in your cousin’s car going from errand to errand.

“So when am I going to get to meet this hunk of yours, Y/N?”  Em asks, pulling you from a detailed daydream of having Bucky dressed (and quickly getting undressed) like a fireman for your eyes only.  “Gee said the pictures don’t come close to showing how big the guy really is.”

“Y-yeah.”  You say, clearing your throat as all the attention is shifted to you.  “He’s uh...something.”

“Y/N, that is a grotesque understatement.”  Your cousin Maria says.  “Mom showed me the pictures.  The man practically oozes sex!”

“Yeah, you got that right.”  Em’s best friend, Jasmine, giggles from the front seat.  “Em and I may or may not have stalked your Instagram.  Y/N, you work with the hottest men known to man.”  A smug smile fights its way to your face at that.

“Tell me about it.”

The conversation thankfully steers away from your love life as Maria fills Em in on your Aunt’s itinerary for picking up family from the airport.  Still, you can’t stop thinking about Bucky.

Had you always felt like this?  Sure, the guy was super easy on the eyes, but so was the rest of your team!  Up until now, he had just been a friend who was nice to look at.  When had he started making your heart and mind race like this?

The boutique that had fitted the bridal party’s dresses is nothing short of classy.  In fact, when you walked in the first words out of your mouth had been “Holy shit, I’ve never seen anything so bougie.”  The staff hadn’t appreciated that.

You’re all directed to your own dressing rooms, your dresses already hung up in them for you to try on.

You stare at the gown for a moment, taken aback by the beautiful garment.  You hadn’t actually been able to make it to a single fitting, but were easily able to supply your exact measurements as skin-tight catsuits are your daily wardrobe and those had to fit just right.  Sure, they had all told you how beautiful the dresses were but you couldn’t believe you got to wear something like this.

The floor-length gown was a soft color, one that complimented your hair and skin tone perfectly.  For years, you’d gotten used to tactical gear, catsuits, and gym clothes.  Sure, there were dresses involved on missions every now and again, but more times than not Nat was the one going undercover while you were the eyes and ears from afar. You didn’t get wear elegant things like this.  You much preferred the sniper’s detail than you did the seduction.  And it had absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that Bucky was usually your partner on the sniper’s detail.  Nope.  Not at all.

The silk drapes perfectly over your body, accentuating every curve, every contour in only the best ways.  You’ve never felt nor looked like this.  You’re honestly a little speechless when you see yourself, and you aren’t the only one.

“Y/N,” Maria whispers when you emerge.  “You look absolutely stunning.”

“Do you really think so?”  Doing a little spin, you face yourself in the surrounding mirrors.

“Do I really think so?”  Maria’s head suddenly rests on your shoulders, her arms winding around your waist.  You smile at your cousin through your reflection as she hugs you from behind.  “You are going to take Bucky’s breath away. cuz.”

“Thanks, Riri.”  You squeeze her forearms as a way of returning her hug before turning to face her and hold her at arms’ length.  “Emely chose the prettiest dresses.”

“Of course I did!  Only the best for my girls!  Now,”  Em embraces you both before pulling away to shoo you to your dressing rooms.  “Go ahead and get out of them so we can pick up the cake!”

Giggles trickle through the party as you all go to change.  Upon entering your stall, you see your phone light up with a message.  You unlock it with a smile at whose name pops up on your phone - a true feat considering you manage it one handed while also shimmying out of your dress.

Setting your phone down once more, you return the gown to its hanger, smoothing it out before handing it to the awaiting consultant on the other side of the dressing room door.

Another ping alerts you to a message and you cock an eyebrow at his ‘Just finished?  You still at the shop?’  You answer, giggling as you the two of you text while you reach for your bra to finish getting changed.  His latest reply makes you freeze.

He’s kidding.  Of course, he’s kidding.  He’s just fucking with you like he always does.  Why would Bucky Barnes ask you for a picture of you in just your underwear?!

But then what if he wasn’t?  What if Bucky was really asking you for an intimate picture?  What if when you sent it he would groan low in his throat - the groan that never fails to turn you on - as he palms himself through his pants?  Would he bite down on his plump bottom lip with those perfect teeth as he unbuckled his belt and pushed down his pants...

Before you can stop yourself, you’re dropping your bra.  This particular dress couldn’t be worn with a bra and if he wanted to see your bridesmaid lingerie, well then you’d show him!

You open your camera with shaking fingers, taking advantage of this sudden courage before it dissipates.  Angling the phone so the picture starts just above your collarbones, you drape your arm across your chest and press the capture button.  It’s not bad.

The swell of your breasts disappears below your arm, your palm cupping the outside of one to accentuate your cleavage.  Your hip is cocked just so, your back arched and turned slightly for a nice profile photo.  You’d even managed to slip the heels back on, and it did wonders for your legs and backside.  Your backside, which by the way, looks fucking amazing peeking out from underneath slightly sheer lace panties that match the color of your gown perfectly.

You let out a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding and smirk to yourself.

Maybe you would send it.

If anything, you could just tell him to go fuck himself and play it off as a joke...right?

When your phone alerts you to another message, you unlock your phone to attach the photo in his text thread.

But what you see wipes the confident look straight from your face.

A deep regret floods through your chest, followed by painfully powerful embarrassment.  Of course, he was kidding!  Who were you kidding?  He’s your friend; he’s just here pretending to be your boyfriend.  Just because you’re putting on this facade for your family doesn’t mean you’re suddenly going to fall in love with each other!

Brushing off your disappointment, you type back what you hope is a flippant enough response to defuse the situation.  When Bucky suddenly returns to his playful self, you know you’ve done just that.

You lock your phone with a sigh and return to your day clothes before finally emerging from your dressing room.  You immediately put on a smile as you find the rest of the ladies, putting that Avengers training to good use.  You may have felt like absolute shit now, but you weren’t going to let them know, and you sure as hell weren’t going to let it ruin the rest of your week.

“How was the rest of your day?”  Bucky asks as he tugs his shirt off over his head in prep for bed.  “I mean how was it really.”  A groan escapes you before you can stop it.  The greatest assassin known to man would pick up on your behavior at dinner, no matter how minuscule your shift in demeanor.

“It was fine.”  You play off, slipping under the covers in your oversized t-shirt from your favorite band’s concert that you attended with your step-mom in high school.

“Doll.”  He fixes you with a hard stare, ridiculously muscular arms crossing over his broad, bare chest.  It takes everything you have to rip your eyes away from the light dusting of dark hair and freckles against his pale skin.

“Ok, fine!  It was...long.”  You relent.  “Emely dragged us all over and I’m just tired.”

Bucky didn’t buy it, not for a second.  He hummed low and sighed before uncrossing his arms to climb in next to you.  Thankfully, he flicks off the light and that seemed to be the end of that.

“Y’know, if it’ll help you sleep, I don’t mind if you want to snuggle with me.”

“Oh, fuck off Barnes.”  You grumble facing away from him, a fact that you’re glad for because you know you’re blushing.

“I just noticed that you were curled in on yourself last night in a position that didn’t look comfortable at all.  If you were trying to keep your distance for my comfort, I just wanted to let you know you don’t have to.”

A silence falls over the dark room before you give in.  Fumbling with the sheets you let yourself get comfortable, telling yourself that there was nothing weird about sleeping this close to a friend.  Thankfully, this adjustment seems to do wonders as sleep already begins to overtake you.  Before you fall asleep, you mumble.

“...Thanks, Buck.”  You think his fingers brush your own before taking your hand, but write it off as a trick of your groggy mind.

“Anytime, Doll.”

TAGS:

TRUE LOVE TAGS:

@bxtchybrie , @sergeantjamesbarnes107th , @itsanotheravengersimaginesblog , @blackcoffeeandgreenteaforme , @james-bionic-barnes , @mickeyl322 , @stank-tower , @lostinspace33 , @thecrownedrose , @nikkitia7 , @redroomproperty , @magpiegirl80 , @fifi1433 , @knittingknerdy , @specs15 , @justareader , @metalarmandredstar , @agentsofcap , @marvel-lucy , @pickylittlebitch , @shamvictoria11 , @twistedfate108 , @tori-medusa-belongs-to-bucky , @too-many-fandoms-and-shitposting, @allinhishands , @hellomissmabel , @mizzzpink , @smexy-bucky-waifu , @annwhojumps , @avengerofyourheart , @saffreelove , @palaiasaurus64 , @flowercrownsandmetallicarms , @sexyvixen7 , @armenian-nerd, @thiddlestoff , @callingmrsbarnes , @avengebuckybarnes , @splaine-to-me , @to-be-a-sunshine , @heismyhunter , @miladycollie , @4theluvofall , @sebastianbarnesandchrisrogers , @writingourwildestemodreams , @imadandelion-yourearose, @sebbymylove16, @harrysbbby, @italyand5soslover283, @gingerbatchwife,@httpbarnes, @subtletynotwithstanding, @panickingwiththefalloutboys, @hardcorehippos, @ryverpenrad, @stellarfairie, @nativesebby, @violentlyfarts, @dianelogan, @mrtinslydia, @ladylizzieofdarbyshire, @unidentifiedanonfics, @microscopicmonsters, @elohunnie, @ifoundlove-x0vanessa0x, @paprika0437

BUCKY BABES:

@meganlane84 , @thewinterher0 , @winter-in-wakanda , @221bshrlocked , @iamkaties111003 , @castiel-barnes , @creideamhgradochas , @sebbytrash , @nykitass , @livenicebebeautiful , @slickblitz , @supersoldier-buckybarnes , @jarnesbrnes , @my-wings-will-heal, @octopishisahybridanimal, @harleyscheekheart, @leoberosis, @da-sebooty-be-plentiful, @jamesbarncs, @thenightmarebeforesam, @mermaidinplaid, @gucci---garbage, @siliverin, @ageekybookworm, @nilly-willy , @musichowler, @mermaidinplaid

LET’S PLAY PRETEND TAGS:

@l4life, @julesthequirky, @happy-pooter, @angelsofalliteration, @mlehbleh, @maximofos, @fuckthatfeeling, @marvel-fan-queen, @buckyisthepuresthuman,  @sicparvismagnaxi, @jamesbbarnes17, @some-emo-ass-poetry, @natalia-romvnova, @the-mrs-cap-evans, @savetoreadzx, @alyxandriamac, @just-add-butter, @anotherotter, @crazybunny02-blog, 

[derryhawkins]

mike gets a video camera

some cute headcanons involving mike recording the losers!! also this is kind of got hella long so sorry haha

oKAY so let’s get started…

mike gets a video camera one year from his family on his birthday, and the first thing he does with it is take it to the losers so he could film them all goofing around.

the first thing you see is bev up close to the camera with richie making weird faces, bill yelling at them both to back up as mike laughed at how weird they looked, and eddie’s hand in between their faces flipping the camera off.

bev & richie finally move away and mike faces the camera to stan, who tries to move away but bill and eddie keep him in place. ben is standing beside stan looking awkward as ever but smiling nonetheless.

“we are the losers and we do dumb fucking shit,” mike says to the camera after turning it around to face him, almost like he’s talking to someone. “helL YEAH WE DO” - richie

he has a plan of sorts but no one needs to know that sshhh

the video goes to just show them playing a card game in bill’s living room and eddie yelling at richie about cheating before cutting off.

from there on out mike makes sure that the camera is fully charged and he takes it with him whenever all the losers hang out. they all question it but mike is like “i want to film richie doing embarrassing shit”. it’s a partial lie.

the next video he takes is when they’re at the quarry.

he’s filming them jumping off the cliff and into the water from below. he zooms in on everyone and makes sure he gets them all when they jump. when it’s his turn to jump, he races up there and bill films it.

it’s a bit shaky but that’s ok.

the next shot is them all shouting in the water for a few seconds before it zooms in on bev & ben talking. bev kisses ben’s cheek before swimming away.

cue the ‘oh shit oh shit oh shit’ from mike as he secretly gets it on camera. (he shows richie, bill, stan, and eddie later) (they all f r e a k o u t).

there are other short little videos of richie making jokes and eddie telling him to fuck off/stan declining his hi-fives; stan being a fucking savage back at richie or anyone who pisses him off (aka other kids at school who try and make fun of bill’s stutter) (they all had to defend bill at least once & everyone except the bowers gang soon realized that ‘oh fuck ok can’t mess with the Losers’). other short ones are of beverly telling ghost stories, or ben reading poems out loud, or bill playing the piano. just the tiny little things they all do. there’s a short video of mike singing that ben and richie got one day that mike decided to keep.

but the next long one mike takes is when they’re halfway through freshman year of high school and they’re at the barrens.

it starts off with mike zooming in on an obviously flirting richie tozier and an oblivious eddie kaspbrak by a tree not too far away. then mike moves the camera to stan and bill just a foot away from mike. stan’s on his back pointing to the clouds talking about the different shapes and bill is on his back, too, but staring at stan with a fond smile. then mike moves the camera to bev and ben who are sitting and holding hands. they say they’re not dating but tbh everyone knows it’s buLL SHIT

then mike turns the camera to himself and is like “i’m fucking seventh wheeling, i need a girlfriend”.

but then the next thing mike knows, richie is walking around laughing like a crazy person with eddie over one shoulder as the boy yells to be put down.

“i don’t want my face near your fucking ass, tozier!”

“but i have a great ass eds, even your mom said so last night!”

mike got it all on camera, thank god.

bev shoves them both in a stream near by and everyone laughs their asses off. but then bev gets shoved in by stan, who gets shoved in my bill, who gets pushed in my ben, who gets pulled in by eddie, and mike is laughing as he’s recording the entire thing. later once he’s dry, bill takes the camera from mike and records mike being pushed in the stream by richie and bev.

one of mike’s favorite videos is when they decided to do karaoke night together on the last day of summer before sophomore year. during the day they just hung out and he got a few funny/cute moments before they went to bill’s place and sent up a karaoke machine in the living room. bill’s parents were gone on a trip and wont be back until the next day and georgie was at a friend’s house so it was all good.

it was clip after clip of everyone singing badly to popular songs at the time.

richie and eddie sang africa by toto together, forced by bev. they didn’t want to do it bc “it’ll be gay” “exactly, you two fucking wanna kiss each other so go fucking do it”

cue a blushing reddie and cackling stan

but then stan and bill were blushing when ben and mike made them sing I Wanna Know What Love Is

bev and bill did a duet, too, but they weren’t ashamed at all surprisingly. mike did one by himself before he did don’t stop believing with richie and bill, bev recorded it.

they all sang Eye of the Tiger together at the end. mike propped the camera up so it wouldn’t fall and actually got them all in the frame. it fell over near the end, but thats only because bill was like “fuck it” and kissed stan and the two boys literally fell on the couch. mike didn’t bother telling them he got it on camera.

two days later he recorded everyone acting shocked when richie and eddie said they liked each other and started dating like a month ago.

“THIS IS BRAND NEW INFORMATION” - Stan and Bev acting shocked.

he still talks to the camera about how much he loves his friends and narrates likes a story teller whenever someone is doing something Very Dumb or Embarassing. everyone questions him still but he’s like “it makes the video funnier, leave me a l o n e” (it’s for his Plan that he started when first started the videos ok?)

mike gets a serious girlfriend in his junior year and the losers all come over to his house to help get ready for their first date. ben records it all and mike tells him to put the camera away but he doesn’t listen. mike’s grandpa comes in at some point and ben gets him on camera staring at them all for a moment before excitedly telling them that the girl was here.

richie squealed but denies it. “rich, it’s on vid-” “shuT uP EDS”

there’s a video for every birthday party for each of the loser’s.

there’s a video of them all getting ready for prom at richie’s place because his parents were the only ones not home to yell about them being to rambunctious.

there’s a video of each of the homecoming dances, too; and prom.

there’s a video after prom where they’re all a bit tipsy, maybe high, sitting in a diner and all eating quietly with the occasional giggle or way too deep 2 AM thought from one of them.

there’s a video of graduation + them getting ready for graduation. mike got his family to record them walking down to receive their diplomas. they all hang out after at the quarry and there’s another video of them all jumping off the cliff in the same order when mike first recorded it.

throughout college, they’re in different places but they get together enough for mike to record whenever they do.

there’s one video of him yelling “HOLY SHIIIT” and richie yelling “fUCKING FINALLY” as he zooms in on a ring on stan’s left hand. then he makes it zoom back out so he can get both bill and stan’s faces and they both look so happy, mike actually starts crying.

there’s a similar video of stan and beverly doing the same thing to mike and his girlfriend, now fiancee a year later.

and another similar one with bill and ben doing the same thing a few months later as the camera zooms in on eddie’s left hand before going to both richie’s and eddie’s faces.

once again, it happens with ben and bev, and eddie and mike’s now wife say “HOLY SHIIIT” and “fuCKING FINALLY” for benverly.

and you guessed it, he has a some footage of each of their weddings!!

throughout the years they still hang out, even with their little forming families, and mike starts introducing every kid that comes into the picture and still they’re like “mIKE WHY THE FUCK DO YOU TALK TO THE CAMERA LIKE THAT”

they f i n a l l y find out why when they’re all about in their forties and mike insisted on them all coming to his place, just the seven of them plus his wife because she became an honorary loser when they noticed how in love she was with mike.

mike had found out a way to do a video montage of them all.

“ok ok so we’re going to go see my best friends in the entire world!” video and much younger mike told the camera as he rode his bike. “they’re amazing.”

he took the first footage of them jumping off of the cliff and voiced-over their names and what they were like before it went to the next video he took of them all. they were all confused about where the very first video of them was, tho. mike told them to just watch.

they’re favorite songs were playing in the background the entire time

anytime someone knew was introduced mike would pause on their face and a voice over would say their name and all of that shiz

the video montage basically showed all of their times together from middle school to just a few prior with their families and kids. mike’s wife laughed at the video where they were getting him ready for their first date. beverly shrieked when she saw that he got her kissing ben on the cheek. richie threw a pillow at him for the first few vids of him flirting with an oblivious eddie. stan and bill loved the ones that mike got of them, though, bc they were honestly cute.

after going through all of the kids of the losers, video went back to the very first video he took.

bev let out an ‘o shit’ at suddenly seeing her and richie’s younger faces so up close to the camera with eddie’s hand flipping them all off. richie busted out laughing.

once that video was over it went to bev’s son and richie’s and eddie’s two kids doing the exact same thing. (mike told them to do it). then it panned over to one of stan’s and bill’s kids trying to leave with bev’s & ben’s daughter awkwardly standing beside them and mike’s two kids blocking their way from leaving. it was basically a little replica of what their parents had done.

then at the end, the screen went black before saying “may the 2nd generation of the Losers Club have as much fun as we did”

mike’s and his wife’s kids both have video cameras of their own so they can do the same thing

[notagoodplace4gods]

ok but stozier where (this is overuse prob so sorry) rich starts really believing stan doesnt like him in their late teens bc of anxiety and stuff and starts to distance and heyoo flippin the script w/ stan coming in through the window like “wtf man??? ur literally my best friend ily” and then like back to stans and its just pure fluff bc heyo these boys mad in love and richies just like “holy shit ily wowowowoow” yike sorry ~✨

I’m so sorry for taking so long!! This is not exactly what you asked for, but I still hope you’ll like it! Here we go!

It’s on AO3

when stan starts avoiding richie after they went to prom together as bros, richie knows he’s fucked up

he doesn`t know how he fucked up, tho, because he was drunk as hell and he barely remembers what happened

when stan starts avoiding richie after they go to prom together as bros, richie knows he’s fucked up

he doesn’t know how he fucked up, tho, because he was drunk as hell and he barely remembers what happened

the losers can’t tell him what he did because “stan didn’t let you do anything embarrassing, he took you home the moment he realized you were drunk”

richie makes eddie pinky swear that he didn’t see him make a fool of himself at prom

Relieved by his answer, richie starts thinking that maybe stan’s just messing with him Maybe it’s just a joke and he decides to play along

“well let’s see how long he can pretend not to love me lol he won’t last a week”

stan lasts more than a week not talking to richie, barely acknowledging him in the group hangs

richie is low key worried and grows louder so he can draw stan’s attention by any means necessary, which means cruder jokes, over the top impressions, dirty flirting, but stan keeps ignoring him

richie goes from frustrated to angry really fast

and he complains about Stan to everyone, literally everyone but Stan The Man himself

“we don’t know anything richie, why don’t you talk to him?”

richie tries cornering stan after school one day, but stan keeps dodging his questions and answering with “I’m fine”s, which only pisses richie even more because he knows stan isn’t fine

“come on stanley I know you’re angry at me! what did i do?”

“why do you think the world revolves around you, richie? you didn’t do anything and we’re fine.”

“we’re not fine! God, stan, just tell me what I did so I can fix it! Was it because I drank too much and you had to take me home? Was it because I made you leave the prom earlier?”

“what? no richie, that was fine and… Wait, don’t you remember what happened later?” stan takes a deep breath and tries to mask the hurt on his voice. “You don’t.”

“I was drunk… I…”

“Sure, it’s okay, we’re okay, nothing happened, I just have to go.”

richie tries to stop him by grabbing his arm, but stan flinches away so fast richie’s freezes on the spot. Now he’s high key worried

now he knows he’s fucked up.

——————

richie kinda starts avoiding stan back after this, afraid he’ll make  things worse between them

he never asks the losers to intervene, but everytime he meets them, he asks if stan said anything about him

the losers have no idea what’s happening, and they hate it, so they make a plan to get both richie and stan drunk and talking

it’s very difficult getting them together, and moving past the awkwardness, but they do get them drunk, they all get drunk, one night at bill’s. and they’re playing truth or dare

when the bottle stops on stan, richie perks up at the possibility of stan picking truth so he can ask what did he do to make his best friend so mad at him

stan picks dare

for a moment richie’s devastated, but then ben whispers something in his ear and he takes his suggestion.

“I dare you to tell me why you’re mad at me.”

“that’s cheating.”

“It’s the game, you have to tell me.”

“I’m not mad at you.”

“you are! just fucking tell me what i did!

“what didn’t you do, richie?” stan rolls his eyes. “you’re always so…” The alcohol is taking the words from him, so he just gestures at richie’s entire body, to make him understand. “You! It drives me crazy!”

richie’s taken aback. He knows he’s loud and annoying, but he never thought he bothered stan so much “I’m… I’m sorry,”

when they stop talking, the entire room does too. The only sound is when mike gets up, pulling bill along with him and gesturing the others to follow him. “Maybe we should leave you two alone.”

“no!” both stan and richie argue at the same time.

richie takes a deep breath. “come on, stan the man, I just wanna put this behind us and go back to being friends.”

“Friends.” Stan scoffs, and there’s so much venom in his voice, richie unconsciously recoils. “we’re best fucking friends”

richie doesn’t know what to answer, oh even what to feel, so he choses anger. “Fine! Have it your way then” and marches out of the party.

when richie’s anger drains away, he’s just really sad and hurt

the losers go to him the next day, begging him to talk to stan, saying that stan was miserable after he left the party, so “he doesn’t hate you.”

but richie just shrugs them off. stan does hate him. it was clear as day

but what could he have done that would upset stan so much? What was so terrible that ruined their friendship?

he tries his best to remember what happened after stan took him from the prom. He thinks about numerous possibilities, but nothing seems plausible

richie knows very well that he’s a cuddly, needy drunk. But Stan knows him, he’s used to the flirty jokes, the innocent (but not really) touches, and hugs

He remembers he always used to  call stan “love” and “honey” after a few shots, he remembers sitting on stan’s lap and throwing his arms around stan’s neck in other occasions, he remembers stan just shaking his head, lifting him up and making him drink some water before bed. Stan always acted annoyed but he never minded any of that

Not until prom night

Maybe richie crossed a line. Maybe he didn’t stop at the playful flirting and dirty innuendos. Maybe he drank so much, he turned his brain off, and let his heart unfiltered. Maybe he confessed. Maybe he told stan he’d been in love with him for years. Maybe he kissed stan

Oh fuck. oh no no no no nonononono

no wonder stan hates him now. no wonder he’s angry and disgusted and never wants to see richie again

richie wants to crawl up inside a hole and just die

—————-

richie knows stan has stopped hanging out with the others, so he does too

he secretly hopes that his absence will compel stan to return to the group

if anyone gets to keep the losers, if anyone deserves to keep the losers, it’s stan

plus, if stan finds his presence so unbearable, and hates him now, it’s just a matter of time before everyone else does too. If he can’t stop it from happening, then he better prepare himself for it

so he goes from school to home, and from home to school as quickly as he can, he avoids the quarry and the arcade so he won’t meet any of them

He misses them all, though. So much

But mostly he misses Stan

His best friend

the first friend he ever made

the boy with the sarcastic smiles and amazing sense of humour

the boy who always stood by him no matter what

the boy who’d always leave an open window for him to climb into at night

the boy who’d complain about how his bed was too small for them, but would never push richie away, or make him sleep on the couch

the shy quiet beautiful perfect boy richie admired and respected so much

the boy who’d smile at him, and make the stupid bucky beaver and his stupid trash mouth feel worthy and loved and worthy of being loved.

the boy he loved so much

the boy who didn’t love him back, not anymore

not ever

richie wonders if maybe stan misses him too, but the thought is so fucking unreal, he has to laugh.

all the handholding, the laughs, hugs, kisses on the cheek, richie ruined them

richie ruined their friendship

so why would it matter to stan

why would richie matter

spoiler alert: he doesn’t

richie’s loud and annoying and ugly as hell

stan deserves someone better

literally anyone would be better

probably a girl because stan can’t be as sick as he is

——————

the losers keep trying to talk to him, but he always manages to dodge their questions

Everyone is worried because richie looks awful ™ so they decide to do a intervention for them

but richie doesn’t show up to school the next day

Or the next

they’re going crazy with worry, because richie won’t answer his door either

stan is very worried too.

he feels terrible for how he treated richie the past few weeks. He was just sad, angry and bitter, but richie didn’t deserve the way he treated him

he tries calling richie on the phone, but every call goes to voicemail

stan knows it’s his fault.  He was the one who started ignoring richie first, but he’s so worried

He’s on edge all the time, can’t sleep properly, can’t eat properly, god, he’s a mess

He almost trips over himself when his own phone rings. Please be richie, he prays

It’s not richie

——————

bev is the one who gets richie to leave the house. she takes him for a smoke by the barrens

she told him it would just be the two of them

she lied

three cigarettes in, Stan arrives, and Bev excuses herself, mentally asking richie if he’ll forgive her someday

Stan quietly sits down next to richie, who refuses to look at him

They stay like this for a good half an hour. Stan looking at richie, richie looking anywhere but at stan

stan is about to cry, but he swallows the tears. This isn’t about him! This is about his best friend, who’s looking small and broken, and he has to fix it. He has to fix them

“I’m sorry.” He opens his mouth, but the words aren’t his. They are richie’s.

Richie’s apologizing to him

“fuck, stan, I think I finally know what I did to make you hate me, and, god, I’m so sorry.”

stan is speechless, terrified at the thought that maybe richie does remember that night

“I was never going to tell you, I was going to ignore it until it went away, but it’s been years, and it still hadn’t gone away, and I… I’m a horrible person… not worthy of being your friend

stan is offended. “Richie…”

“no… let me finish. I know what I did is unforgivable, and heinous and sick. And I’m so very sorry, but I can’t fix this. So it’s okay if you hate me and never want to see me again.I understand”

“richie!” Stan grabs his shoulders and shakes him a little.”What is it you think you did at prom?”

“you don’t have to do this.” richie shakes his head. “I know I… I kissed you. Didn’t I?.”

Now Stan starts crying. “No. no you didn’t.”

richie’s eyes go so wide it would be comical in any other situation

“Fuck. then you’re just mad at me for a stupid joke, or whatever and I went and spilled my feelings for you, instead of just apologizing. Now you hate me for real, and…”

“I don’t hate you, I never did and I never will.” Stan cuts him off.

richie nods dumbly, not letting himself feel relief because the fact stan doesn’t hate him does not necessarily means that stan likes him back.

“Do you wanna know what you did that made me so mad?” Stan waits for richie’s nod before continuing. If richie said what stan thinks he said, telling him about this should be easy. “You fell asleep.” It’s not

silence

richie does his best not to break it because he knows stan’s not finished

“I took you home, and tried to get you to bed. You didn’t want to. You wanted to dance.” Stan smiles at the memory. “I asked what could i possibly do to convince you to go to sleep and you asked me to cuddle you.”

richie cringes. well that was embarrassing

but it’s not the end of the story

“so I did. we laid down at your bed, and we were so close, I…” Now it’s stan’s turn to take a deep breath. “I kissed you, Richie. I kissed you, you kissed me back, but then you fell asleep mid kiss and I…”

richie’s heart stops, and he finally looks directly into stan’s eyes

“I was so ashamed, I couldn’t face you after this.” now it’s stan who diverts his eyes. “And then you told me you didn’t remember and I was so hurt, so angry. I mean, I knew you were drunk, I took a chance, but I still… God, richie, you were my first kiss.”

“stan.” richie kneels, and moves next to his friend, his best friend, the boy who, for whatever reason, loves him back, and takes his face on his hands. “stan, I’m sorry I’m so stupid.”

“It’s okay, richie.” Stan tries. “You were drunk, and I shouldn’t have taken advantage of that, then felt sorry for myself and acted like a jerk, but…” Stan’s hands are shaking. “I like you more than I thought I could ever like someone, and it scared me so much, I withdrew from everyone. I avoided you like crazy because I couldn’t let you know, I couldn’t let you reject me.”

“stan.” richie calls for him again, and their eyes meet. “stan, I’m stupid, but you’re also very stupid, oh my god, we’re so stupid.” he groans. “I like you. You like me back. We like each other.” He says it, slowly, as if trying to understand.

“We do.” Stan breathes, amazed.

They only stare at each other for a moment, holding hands like their lives depend on it.

“I’m sorry.” Stan says.

“I’m sorry too.” Richie says it back.

A pause. Then. “Do I get to redo that first kiss?”

Stan pushes him over, and richie laughs

“we never really danced at prom, did we? I bet you refused to dance with me after prom too.”

“I…” Stan narrows his eyes. “Do you really wanna dance, now?”

“Sure.” richie knows stan didn’t mean it as an invitation, but he takes it anyway. He bows. Stan rolls his eyes, but doesn’t stop richie from inching closer, and closer. “Let’s redo the entire night.”

They dance for a while, no music, no rhythm. They dance until richie steps on stan’s toes, and stan pushes him away so hard richie falls on the grass

They laugh, and laugh, and laugh

(god, they both missed this so much)

“Okay, so I’m never doing that again.” stan says, but he’s smiling. “We’re done, richie.”

“not yet.” richie says, getting back up, and he looks serious

he takes a step closer

stan takes another step to meet him in the middle and his hand goes into richie’s hair

richie’s hands are trembling, but he takes them to stan’s neck

they kiss

they look at each other

they kiss again and again and again

“Don’t you dare fall asleep on me again, asshole.” Stan says, lips brushing against richie’s

“Oh, don’t worry, Stan the Man, I’m up.” He motions down to his pants. “I’ll be up all night…”

“fucking my mom, i know.” stan answers, the same time richie finishes with “fucking you.” and they look at each other, for a second.

“Fuck you, richie.” Stan is trying to look mad, but he can’t stop laughing

“Well… if you want to, sure. I can be into it.” richie doesn’t miss his mark, but before he says anything else, stan’s kissing him again

richie kisses him back

and they kiss, and kiss, and kiss for a long time.

[viralhottopics]

‘Are You The One?’ Recap: So Bad For Them But I’m Doing Fine

Well, its Wednesday night and Im a bottle of wine in. Its time to love myself like that Hailee girl told me to and turn on some . Because nothing is better for your self-confidence then to watch other people fail. Miserably.

Last year Sams mom got in touch with me and this year its Giannas brother. Who will be next to defend their loved ones on the recaps? Carolinas great aunt? Stay tuned!

BACK AT THE HOUSE

Shocker, they all start binge drinking. Cant wait to see how much weight they all gain by the end of the season.

Little Mike is talking to Casandra about all the things he likes to do. These hobbies include taking long walks on the beach, gelling his hair and taking a daily measurement of his penis. His growth spurt is coming, okay?!

Casandra literally looks like a bobblehead and is like OKAY, OKAY, OKAY.

Little Mike: I LOVE LAMP

Mike wants to get to know Cas but also low-key hates her for having a family and being #blessed. He legit calls her a daddys girl to her face and shes not even phased. He starts talking about how his mom is broke and his dad is crazy and Im like, woah, did I change the channel accidentally to ? This shit is way too heavy for me rn.

If I could describe the house in three words that they all could understand it would be: Drunk. Horny. Stupid. In that order. Because they arent planning on getting a real job any time after this, they decide to throw an underwear party.

Ozzy is like Kathryn is very sexy, idk what it is about her that I like. He says as she grinds on him in her underwear. Hmmm, I wonder what it could be that makes you like her?

They start making out and he tells her that tomorrow is his birthday. So obviously she has to have sex with him because of THE IMPLICATION. (Name that reference and I will marry you.)

Tyler and Taylor are both like hey this underwear party is fucking gross and Im like FUCK YA TEAM NORMAL PEOPLE.

Tyler is like everyone is acting trashy and Im trying to better myself. Woah, ok. Profound. Tyler def got lost on the way to auditions and ended up on . Either that or hes a fucking narc.

Apparently nothing makes Tylers dick harder than belittling the people you live with and he starts making out with Taylor. Overall, v hot couple.

Then the camera pans out to literally everyone just hooking up. , brought to you by Trojan Condoms.

THE GAME

The game starts with everyone being blindfolded and the boys tied up, which is coincidentally also the first scene of .

The girls have to smell the guys and untie the one they want to take on a date. Because thats normal. The first three couples to finish go on a date.

The girls start sniffing and falling more than cokeheads at an EDM concert.

Kari has some big-ass eyes so every time she talks she looks fucking crazy. Actually, she kind of looks like me when Im high but Im pretending that Im not high so Im overly opening my eyes. Idk, just trying to create a visual.

Karis like “I STUDIED NEUROSCIENCE ONCE IN COLLEGE, PHEROMONES ARE REAL Yeah, no one said they werent#Science.

KARI: This one time, in my neuroscience class

Kari picks Joey the trashman, who I thought smells like shit but I guess not.

Hannah picks Tyler and is like wow, this blindfold makes it so hard to see. I totally respect blind people. Wow, Im sure blind people everywhere feel so fucking complimented. Like look mom, that girl on TV understands my daily struggle for 3 minutes!

They can still hear you being a dumbass, you know.

Alicia smells Andre because he, and I quote, smells like Fritios. This is like the cheapest advertisement Fritos has ever had. Also, Andre its time to get some new cologne.

Andre/Alicia, Joey/Kari and Hannah/Tyler all win and they are going to go windsurfing. Thrilling.

BACK AT THE HOUSE

Gianna apologizes to Hayden for being a low-key bitch last week and hes already well settled into his home on friendzone island.

Michael walks by and Gianna is like hanging on Hayden. Michael is very over it and Gianna is like . Fuck, okay.

Kam and Eddie are flirting and being cute and idk I like them so they better not fuck this up for me.

MY MOM: I like the girl with the grey-ish, purple-ish hair ME: Literally their names are at the bottom of the screen.

Carolina is very upset that Joey the trashman is going on a date with KARI (her name will be in all caps now because her eyes just make me feel some type of way). Carolina starts crying and shes like if youre not my match what is my purpose?! In the distance you can hear me screaming ITS WEEK TWO YOU DUMB BITCH.

THE DATE

Andre is the only one who can windsurf and Hannahs like”oh Daddy.” In the words of our President-Elect, everyone else is a bunch of losers. Huge losers! Failing at wind surfing! All talk, no action!

KARI is being really nice to Joey and saying hes fun and shes excited to be there and hes like ACTUALLY Im into Carolina. Woah. Okay, I know KARI may kind of look like Crazy Eyes but she seems nice and shes actually being genuine. So in my drunken state rn I am very mad for her.

Joey has officially moved to my shit list. And I dont even mean that because hes a trashman. Where he quite literally has to pick up shit. Get it? Ill see myself out.

Andre and Alisha seem to be getting along but IDK, they kinda act like little children. They talk a big game about how they are really into each other but I just cant see it. And Im pretty much a fucking expert at this show.

And none for Tyler and Hannah, bye!

THE TRUTH BOOTH

Andre and Alicia to the booth because the house isnt fully brain-dead. Everyone Is like “THEY ARE SO STRONG! THEYRE IN LOVE AFTER A WEEK.”

See, you say strong, I say fucking crazy.

And guess what, Im right motherfuckersNO MATCH.

Alicia starts crying and saying she doesnt want to be here. Damn, okay then fly tf outta here, what?

Hannah is like “HEY I KNOW YOUR HEART JUST BROKE, BUT IM GONNA GO AFTER ANDRE.” Its all about the subtle game. Hannah, could you like, chill your hoe ass down for a sec?

Hannah and Andre are talking and hes like I knew we werent a match and Im everyone at home is like wait you just told Alicia man, thats fucked up.

Andre and Hannah start making out because #drama.

Alicia starts flipping the fuck out and is like YOURE A LIAR AND A FLIRTER AND A MINGLER!!!

Whats a mingler? Just someone who mingles? I feel like thats real nondescript. Im going to need a full definition plz. DM me.

Andres like “THESE GIRLS ARE CATCHING FEELINGS!” Uh, its not just girls. Joeys over here acting like a baby back bitch.

Hoes, am I right?

THE MATCHUP

The boys get to pick tonight and this ought to be a shit show because none of them strike me as scholars.

Oswaldo picks KARI. Random, dont care.

Ozzy picks Kathryn because he wants that birthday sex. Ozzys like she makes me feel like home. Uh, Ozzy thats because you are home. Youre a local, your house is like, down the street.

Jaylen picks Kam, fucking up the thing she had with Eddie.

Eddie picks Shannon, womp womp.

Derrick pity picks Alicia.

Hayden, who is sporting a pair of capris, picks Taylor. Obviously Taylor wants to be with Tyler so this is def a surprise. She actually says those exact words and Hayden has now purchased a summer home on friendzone island.

Tyler says something fucking stupid about how Hayden is doing him a favor? Idk his foot is so far up his mouth and Taylors like 3 seconds away from putting her foot in his ass. So much for team normal.

Andre picks Hannah. Alicia is like “IT IS WHAT IT IS” but also wants to murder Hannah.

Michael caves and picks Gianna. WTF.

Joey picks Carolina and they kiss because THEY ARE DUMB THATS WHY.

Mike picks Casandra because shes his uptown girl.

Tyler picks Tee and they both are like, “Welp. Fuck me right?”

Okay, so this is sketch. Not looking so hot for them rn.

Were waiting for beams and Im drinking, thinking no fucking way are they going to blackout. Its only week 2. But in the words of President-Elect: The polls were wrong! The experts were wrong! Sad!

And yes, THEY BLACKOUT.

They all lost half a million dollars. Im laughing but its a nervous laugh because now they all are going to be on suicide watch or something.

Everyone has to deal with the fact that the person they are with is not their match. No Mike/Cas, Ozzy/Kathryn, Gianna/Michael, Joey/Carolina or Hannah/Andre. WOW. Major blow. Im loving this.

A sad song starts playing and people start crying. Damn, this just got as depressing as Mikes family life.

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Read more: http://ift.tt/2j2Vyy9

from ‘Are You The One?’ Recap: So Bad For Them But I’m Doing Fine

[thefanficmonster]

Kick Some Ghost Ass

”Until Dawn Gang x Reader (Gender Neutral)

Warnings: Swearing, Sex jokes (excuse my bad humor)

Genre: CRACK, Humor

Summary: It’s one thing when trouble finds this gang, but why don’t we take a look at what happens when they go actively looking for trouble. Needless to say, chaos ensues and no one is spared. Some are more affected than others, and some are dead-ass traumatized, but isn’t that just how life is in general?

Requested by my dearest ever - Until Dawn Anon. Hi lovely! I’ve missed writing your requests and I’m really happy to be back, creating another chaotic fic! I’m sorry it has taken me so long to post it but here it finally is - crazy as ever! I hope you enjoy it! Love you to Blackwood Pines and back baby ❤❤❤

I don’t know how I’ve found myself in this situation but I’m not complaining. If I get to do dumb crazy shenanigans with my crew, I’m ready for just about anything. Not to mention I’m no stranger to ghost hunting. I’m that kid that made DIY Ouija boards and took them to cemeteries with their terrified friends. You should’ve seen us leaving after capturing no ghostly activity - my friends relieved as fuck, and me pissed as fuck.

But today, I’m not expecting nor will I be accepting any disappointment. Especially not with Jess swearing on her Chanel purse that she wasn’t making things up when she said she had a haunted house she wanted us to visit. I must say, I appreciate this group’s enthusiasm when it comes to the paranormal. Never have I had someone who catches my vibe on the subject so well, let alone an entire gang all sharing the same opinion as me - that ghosts, demons and poltergeists are so fucking cool. Sure, Emily took a bit of convincing and Jess is not one to give a shit about the other world creatures invisible to the human eye, but something allegedly happened that changed her mind.

Her a-hundred-and-something-year-old great-grandmother passed away recently and though the death itself didn’t shake Jess up as much as it probably should’ve, the events that followed led to this moment right now - the eleven of us pooling out of two minivans that have pulled up to a terrifying looking house in a wooded are of the suburbs. Jess literally gathered us all on an ‘emergency meeting’ in the courtyard of our college just so she could explain the situation in detail - she doesn’t do well with explaining things in general, let alone when she’s hysterical - so we only understood what she was trying to say when she mentioned the word ‘ghost’. That’s when we all started listening more closely, with the exception of Emily, Beth and Sam but the latter two were intrigued despite trying yo hide it. You can only imagine how excited Josh, Chris and I were, Mike and Matt following a close second behind. Ash was a tiny bit more hesitant but Chris convinced her to give in. And just like that, a week later, here we are.

“I gotta ask, did your great-gran own a VHS player? Or a chest in the attic? Bonus points if there’s a creepy, child-sized doll in there.“ Josh asks as he yanks all the equipment he insisted we bring out of the trunk of the minivan.

“Quit fucking around, Josh! This is serious!“ Jess complains from the spot she’s standing in, shivering in the cold autumn breeze.

“Yeah, Josh! VHS players, creepy dolls, that’s all child’s play.“ I scold him as I pull on my jacket, wrapping it around me more tightly, “Shit gets serious when there’s a secret basement.“

“Y/N!“ Jess shrieks in exasperation. Honesty, how am I supposed to NOT bother her when doing the opposite is so much easier and brings more amusement? “You’re not helping!“

“Wasn’t trying to.“ I wink at her, driving her into a new level of fury that almost leads her to chuck her phone at me. If it weren’t such a prized possession of hers, I’m pretty sure she would’ve chucked it with the intention of knocking me dead. I’m lucky she has the aim of a drunk toddler that spun around fifteen times.

“Hey, quit pissing my girlfriend off, will ya?!“ Mike, who is basically halfway inside the trunk of the other van calls out to us.

I roll my eyes but choose to let it slide. However, someone else doesn’t. Emily does a dramatic turn on her heel, turning to face Mike, or at least the only part of him which is visible. You can imagine how hard it is arguing with an ass like THAT. I don’t know how Emily does it but oh well, I guess I do it too, in a way.

“So it’s girlfriend now, huh? No space between the words?“ Oh that smile she’s flashing him, it could make the Devil himself shiver. I find it kinda hot though - it means shit’s about to go down or hit the fan, either way, the rest of us will be entertained.

Mikey boy straightens up, gracing the rest of us by-standers with his dazzling features. Nah, I’m capping. I honestly think Mike is as attractive as I am patient - very little, almost not at all. It’s surprising how him and Jess are now apparently together since I always pegged her to be the superficial type.

“Got a problem with that, Em?“ He asks, eyebrow raising, head tilting to the side. Oh yeah, it’s on now. But, as someone who’s been quite excited to do some ghost hunting, and also as a representative of the peanut gallery formed of the rest of us who find it amusing and annoying, I feel the need to cut it short before it goes where it shouldn’t. I came to see some exorcist shit, not Keeping Up With The Bitter Exs.

“Jess, I sure hope your grandma is a blood-thirsty ghost cause I can think of at least two people I’d serve to her on a silver platter.“ I snatch the keys the blond has been jingling nervously between her fingers and jog up the stairs to the front door.

Ok I maybe overexaggerated the eeriness of the house. It sure wouldn’t sit right with you if you saw it around sunset or at night, especially not if it’s foggy, but a horror movie house it is most certainly isn’t. It’s pristine and well kept, not a single crack in the walls, the only reason it’s unsettling is because: 1) We’ve all seen a few too many horror movies; 2) There’s been reports of ‘ghostly activity’ - as far as Jess is to be trusted.

While I’m surfing through all the keys, checking each and every single one of them on the door because the real key is unmarked, I can’t help but overhear the conversation going on behind me on the porch.

“Can you believe we got all this in a single day and for a discount on top of all?! Whoever says Craigslist sucks isn’t doing it right.“ Chris’ enthusiasm over the deal him and Josh got on the ghost hunting equipment has been what’s keeping a wide grin on his face this whole time. Though I’m proud of my boys for not getting murdered by the Craigslist seller, I must say I hate that I lost the bet we had - I had to pay them each ten bucks if they didn’t get scammed/kidnapped/murdered and I’m now twenty bucks poorer. I’m not saying I value those twenty bucks more than my friends, though my broke ass needs all the bucks it has and all the dollar bills it could get, but Lord knows I hate losing.

“Yeah, and the guy was only mildly sketchy.“ Josh adds just as excitedly and proudly, “To be honest, Cochise and I were probably the scary looking ones in that parking lot.“

A look over my shoulder shows the twins, Sam, Matt and Ash giving the duo skeptical and somewhat disappointing looks and shakes of their heads. I’ll admit, the equipment is in very good condition and it’s the complete set for ghost-hunting, according to BuzzFeed at least. I’m impressed with the purchase - probably had something to do with how scary Chris and Josh actually look. The all-nighters we’ve all been pulling lately have taken a toll on them worst with the dark circles and bags under their hollow eyes, pale faces and brains turned to mush. I know I’d give them a discount to avoid them pulling out meat cleavers on me.

“That’s all fine and dandy guys, but do you know how to work any of this?“ Sam asks, hesitantly lifting the EMF reader and turning it in her hand, analyzing it with a curious gaze. 

Josh and Chris exchange a look before the former replies, “Just the cameras and voice recorder, the rest falls on them.” He points a finger at me and laughs, “Though they aren’t able to work something as simple as keys, they are more than qualified to be a ghostbuster.”

“You know, Josh, jokes on you, I can work keys! Jess, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to be able to work well with organizing things, hence my problem with these keys.“ I hurl the bunch of keys connected my a scarlet keychain at Josh, “Lemme demonstrate my true skills.“ I hop down the flight of stone stairs and approach the pile of equipment the guys have created smack-dab in the middle of the house’s driveway. 

“Oh, I gotta see this!” Mr. Ex-Class-President all but runs over, frowning when we all turn to look at him just as I pick up the spirit box to show off how it works, “Oh that’s what you meant. So you aren’t taking your clothes off?“

Jess and I are alike in one thing - the need we feel to chuck objects at people who piss us off. “You’re girlfriend is, like, right behind you, Munroe. Have some decency!”

“I was gonna enjoy a show as well, but I’m guessing we won’t be getting one.“ The girlfriend in question replies, looking at me quizzically as though that’s gonna convince me into discarding my outfit.

“No, unless you’re a ghost.“ I point the device I’m holding at Mike, “But if your boyfriend here keeps acting up I might turn him into one.“

“That sounds kinda kinky.“ Beth’s comment surprises me. The wink she sends me even more so. “And I kinda like it.“

Ok, ok, ok, hold on. 

Flirting with Munroe is one thing, but Beth is a completely different story. I can be threatening Mike with a knife one moment and cracking sex jokes with him over cold beer the next. While Beth actually has the ability to get me flustered and blushing, and my close relationship with her brother doesn’t help. Mother fucker can just whack me upside the head every time he catches me fussing over my silly crush on his sister.

“Ew, you too! Keep it in your pants or at least get a room.“ Emily doesn’t miss a beat when it comes to being herself. She’s truly a garbage bin full of treasure.

“We’d do the latter if SOMEONE could get the door open.” I glare daggers at Josh who is making hopeless attempts at what I was doing earlier - unlocking that damn door.

“I’d be more than happy to come through for you ladies.“ Mike says, getting in a stance of a runner before a race, his body directly opposite the door.

Oh I can’t wait to see where this is going. I SHOULD RECORD IT.

“Mike, it’s still breaking and entering and it’s still against the law even if the person’s dead.“ Sam points out, entering her mother-like mode, ruining the fun and causing me to pout at her. She gives me a look of disappointment - one worse than I’ve ever seen on my parents - so I just shut my trap before she can also express said disappointment through words and have me feeling guilty for the rest of the day.

A loud crash suddenly echoes causing us to turn our heads to look for the source of the terrifyingly startling sound. One glance is all it takes to put our minds at ease and a second one is enough to provoke different reactions in all of us - the broken window telling the story of where Josh has disappeared.

“What did I just say about breaking and entering?!“ Sam shouts after him while the vast majority of us are cracking up like hyaenas. Jess is just gaping at the broken window next to the front door in disbelief. She obviously can’t decide whether to join in on the fun or serve as back-up to Sam. Josh did technically damage private property that’s partially hers, but if you ask me it serves her right for not marking her keys.

“Sorry, I was too busy breaking the window to hear that part of the conversation!“ Josh’s apologetic smile appears on the other side of glassless frame. I can’t tell if he’s genuinely sorry or holding back laughter but either way, he looks innocent enough for Sam to let him off the hook as long as he doesn’t cause any more trouble - in which case: tough luck. Chris, Josh and I are nothing if not troublemakers, especially when we’re together. Chris tones it down when Ash’s around, and the same goes for Josh with Sam while I’m simply problematic regardless of who’s watching. My chaos is untamable, it’s a blessing and a curse and I love it, even though it’s landed me in hot water more than once. It’s nice to be around people on the same wavelength - chaos resides within this group and not a single one of us can hide it.

“At least we have a way in now.“ Ash offers Josh a helping hand in this argument after she recovers from the overwhelming fit of laughter. “I hope the broken window doesn’t anger your gran, Jess.“

The blond snaps out of her trance briefly, “No, she was a very sweet lady, but damn is Josh creative!” She hurries to correct herself, “Destructively creative.”

I hurry to correct her once again, “Chaotically creative.”

“Guys, do you mind coming in? It’s very creepy standing here alone!“ Josh calls out to us, looking over his shoulder at the interior of the house, “I’m expecting to be snatched and dragged to that secret basement we mentioned.“

“Mention it one more time and I swear to God-!“ Jess screams, fists tightened.

Before her angry wrath could crash atop us, we all make our way into the house through the broken window, carefully avoiding the shards of glass strewn about. One step inside and we’re met with the upmost of horror clichés - a drop in temperature. We’re all wearing thick hoodies because the weather outside is chilly in and of itself, but said hoodies aren’t as efficient at holding the house’s cold at bay and away from out skin.

Chris and Matt make their way in last, carrying the equipment consisting of three cameras, flashlights for everyone, an EMF reader, a spirit voice box, a voice recorder and a motion detector. I help them hand a light to each group member as well as a ghost-hunting device before we venture onward.

“If I were your grandma’s ghost, I’d be ten times more pissed about that window. It looks to me like that lady payed a lot of attention to keeping things in order.“ Matt comments while he examines the expensive looking painting hanging in the hallway.

I hear Emily scoff, “Unlike some.” but the remark is said so quickly and quietly I’m pretty sure I’m the only one who heard it.

Jess laughs, “She did like things in order, but she was never as strict as you might think. As I said, she was very sweet.“

“So do you just not take after her at all or were you adopted?“ Emily’s remarks are no longer a mumbled jumble of words, “No, nevermind, of course you’re not adopted. Your parents are smart people, they wouldn’t have chosen you if they had the chance.“

Jess laughs again, much more menacingly this time, causing me to exchange a look with Hannah who’s walking beside me. “Twenty bucks says one of them isn’t making it out of here.” It’s just a matter of time, to be honest. If not the lodge, or any party we’ve ever attended as a group, this haunted house is the perfect opportunity for a murder. We could even argue it was a ghost.

Luckily, the two cats clawing at each other’s throats don’t overhear, “No, my parents aren’t stupid, but your boyfriend clearly is. He chooses to date you! Or are you holding him captive or something.“

Ok that’s enough. I can tolerate a lot of things, but people calling one of my best friends stupid is not something I’m about to put up with, “How dare you call one of my hoes stupid?” I sneer at Jess, eyes narrowing.

“I thought I was your hoe too!“ She fights back, looking almost offended.

“Even more reason you shouldn’t have called him that! I don’t tolerate my hoes not respecting each other.“ 

I don’t get to see where this argument goes because Ashley’s shriek echoes throughout the hallway, stealing mine as well as the attention of everyone else. 

“There’s a ghost in here!“ Making it to the doorway of the room she’s in first, I peak my head inside and see the EMF reader she’s holding going nuts as if it’s detected something.

“Don’t worry, Ash, there’s a dead cactus here. That’s not the ghost we’re looking for, is it?“ Chris, my amazingly bright friend says, quirking an eyebrow suggesting that remark was nothing short of dead-ass serious.

“Chris, darling, that’s not how it works. Cactuses are plants.“ I point out as sweetly as I can as to mask my laughter.

“Don’t the same ghostly rules apply?“ The genuine look of confusion he gives me almost makes me lose it.

“Ok children, leave the room, we need to set up a motion detector to be sure.“ Beth says with a tone that suggests she’s more than over our insanity. Jeez, count on her and Sam to start parenting us through our chaos. They are of high authority, must admit - one genuinely feels bad if they don’t comply to whatever these two girls demand.

We all pile out in the hallway while the twins set up this interesting motion detector with green dots. I don’t know what Jess’ granny looked like, but I bet that even the most unattractive of people would look hella good with this lighting. Thankfully the room is dark enough with the shutters closed and the curtains drawn, allowing the dots to be perfectly visible.

We stare at the minimalistic room littered with fluorescent green dots on every surface for maybe a minute or two but not much happens to the disappointment to some and relief to others. However, as if not wanting to let us down, the ghost makes a shy appearance if the shift of the green dots is anything to go by.

“Oh shit, is that a ghost?“ Chris whispers, sounding as amazed as I feel in this moment.

“It better be.“ I mutter in response, refusing to blink and risk missing anything important.

The sudden presence of the obnoxious noise of the spirit voice box makes us all jump. As I turn my head to glare at whoever’s using it, Josh speaks up. “Are you an attractive ghost?”

“Josh, that’s my great-grandmother, you ass!“ Jess barks with disgust in her voice.

In the meantime, I catch glimpse of Mike rolling up his sleeves. Oh shit, this ain’t good.

“I’ve been waiting for this!“ He shouts victoriously, cracking his knuckles.

Knowing this won’t end well, the first thing I do is snatch the camera from Chris’ hands and turn it on.

“Um, Mike, what do you mean?“ Sam’s back to being concerned, turning to the rest of us when Mike doesn’t give her a response, “What’s he gonna do?“

“Fight it.“ I answer as though it’s the most normal thing to ever have been done, “Or, ash he calls it - kick some ghost ass.“

“A freaking ghost?! He’s gonna try to tussle with something he can’t see?“ I can’t tell if Matt’s tone is disbelief, amusement or disappointment, but I believe he isn’t about to try and stop or dear ex-president in his pursuit and that’s all that matters. I ain’t about to let someone stop whatever’s about to go down from going down.

“That’s still my great-grandmother, you dumbass!“ Jess shrieks with something alike terror.

“Don’t worry Jess, I’m sure she’ll go easy on him.“ I say in an attempt to reassure her but I can’t even be bothered really, I’m too laser-focused on the circus that’s about to take place in front of me.

Mike, as if encouraged by my words, charges into the room. Much to his dismay, before he could even reach the ghost, he’s met with a much more vigorous enemy - the carpet. The rascal trips him up and Mr. Munroe falls flat on his face.

The group stays silent, looking at the glorious aftermath of the glorious fall. Told ya these lights could make everything fabulous. Must say, it’s truly an honor for me to have been able to catch all that on tape.

“10/10, would ghost-hunt with Mikey Munroe again.“