#so so so anxious
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ヽ（≧□≦）ノ
#ok cant sleep#keep crying#eyes hurt#why didnt meletonin work like it does every night#alarm going off in 6 hours#not enough sleep#dont feel tired at all#just anxious#so so so anxious#why is this feeling happening#i canceled plans with the guy earlier because anxiety was just not letting me leave my apartment#i got fully ready to go out and just couldnt do it#ngl i think a part of it is not having glasses#like there are much bigger fish to fry but i kind of feel like having my glasses is a little tiny piece of armor#((not to mention its super disorienting when everything is blurry))#((do you know how many times i poked myself in the face today because i kept trying to adjust my glasses that werent there))#i hate having my face exposed#its too real#tbh i would wear sunglasses 24/7 if it was normal#then people wouldnt give me shit all the damn time about eye contact#ppl call eyes the window to the soul then call ME weird for not wanting to look into them#sorry the WINDOWS to your SOUL are a little much for me#FUCK I NEED TO SLEEP#alarm in 5 hours and 55 mins
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Was forced to get a new phone today
#Bluetooth earbuds are the bane of my fucking existence and I hate them so fucking bad#I NEED those wired buds to fiddle with my hands when I’m anxious#I also like not having to fucking CHARGE the things I’m listening to stuff with#I hate this future this sucks bootyass#prince rambles in this chilies tonight
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birthday tomorrow
#Not super excited tbh#i have heard 23 is not a great year#and i have a dentist appointment AND a job interview today so it’s just gonna be a bad day#so so so anxious
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#tumblr polls#random polls#poll time#i love looking at usernames and wondering what it MEANS#so many of you guys have such cool sounding usernames#i just picked random words i like LMAO#serious because people always see me as super serious irl (i'm just a very anxious perfectionist lol)#and turd because i have the sense of humor of a toddler and think poop jokes are funny
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dm'ing a mutual you've never interacted with one-on-one is so embarrassing like. hi.... im sorry. you can kill me if you want... can i have your discord..... if not.. feel free to shoot me down where i stand... im sorry.. i'll leave..
#ianriley#guy who loves to talk#but is so anxious that someone else will actually throttle me for suggesting a conversation#its okay!#i. will dm. first. i usually do.
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Look at me. In the eyes. Lookatmeintheeyes. You're gonna train your dog to be comfortable in kennels. You're gonna teach them to tolerate strangers. You will do this for me. Because your dog will get sick. And it will go to the vet. And I will have to interact with your dog. And if it howls for twelve hours straight and tries to eat me whenever I touch it. Well I'll still be nice to it. But I would prefer if it was kennel trained at the very least.
#on a more serious note aggressive / anxious dogs cost more to hospitalize simply because they require more drugs to be handleable.#so if you wont do it for me. do it for the money it saves you.#it also delays care if we for example have to sedate for every xray. and limits treatment options to an extent.#hospital schmospital
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favorite character type is "nonconfrontational but will slash your tires in the dark shroud of night"
#and no not in a cowardly way#in a 'socially anxious and hates dealing with conflict face-to-face#but is totally willing to enact vengeance so long as it doesn't run the risk of awkward conversations' way
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What can go wrong? The squad have everything under control!
That toke me so many hours n fixes to complete. It's silly, it's chaotic and maybe not everything makes perfect sense but it's my ultimate bby:3
#baldur's gate 3#bg3#bg3 comic#astarion#halsin#wyll#karlach#rolan#shadowheart#lae'zel#baldurs gate 3 fanart#I'm so excited n anxious to post everything together
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double dates and Quokki pets
#fantasy high junior year#fantasy high#dimension 20#ayda aguefort#figueroth faeth#fig faeth#mary ann skuttle#gorgug thistlespring#fhjy#figayda#actually i think they should be a polycule#making fanart always makes me so anxious aaaaaaaaaaaaa
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uhmm. swap carpet stuff.
#gravity falls#fiddauthor#stanford pines#fiddleford mcgucket#lab creations#caring gradually less and less about what I post publicly as you may be able to tell#listening to that interview made me kind of anxious so I had to draw them. as one does
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my sweet old man who is genuinely too kind for the world he lives in :(
#decadentart#bloodborne#retired hunter djura#he makes me so sick hes actually so fucking sweet when i think about it#Yes i gave her a skirt. whenever i draw the people of old yharnam i slways give tbem little accesories :)#the colors are a bit wonky because i intially drew it Reeaaalllyy Dark also idk i picked out some weird ass colors for the pallete#every time you shoot him off that tower an angel looses its wings#legimitately got upset when i killed him for his set#made sure he didnt fall to his death though. thats called bullying when you knock him off btw#also yeah i hc that the beasts are chill w him . and slso he knows all of their names#first maintagged art on this blog. shudders. i hope the fans dont eat me alive im serious you guys scare me#the halo was necessary btw#so anxious…. SEND IT! RAHHH!!! MY AUTISM BLAST GO!
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band-aid ^-^
#1st one basically has everything in it that I love to see in the world#my point is that deku eventually stops crying but bakugo never stops being stressed out he is an anxious chihuahua#2nd one was a small comic but i literally cant do comics and i didnt want to do the backgrounds so i just colored in this central sketch#sorryyyy just imagine the lore :((#bnha#midoriya izuku#deku#bakugo katsuki
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The thing about jonmartin is that Martin wants to be a romantic, he loves poetry and probably watches romance but for him it is a fantasy, a silly game he plays. Martin is at his core very cynical. Things don't work out for him so he doesn't really belive in romance, it is a pretty dream but that's it. He is pratical and realist. Dating Jon he has to remind himself it is real and he actually struggles with romantic gestures, it is something he has to remind himself to do, to remind himself he can do even and honestly who even has the energy and what if Jon doesn't even like it?
Jon on the other hand wants to be cynical. His first coping mechanism was pretend the things he was afraid of weren't real and goddam if he isn't afraid of love. It didn't really work to him so far so it's easy to pretend he doesn't care. But he is a romantic at heart. He saw love and he read about it and he has enough evidence that it is undeniable. And to be honest Jon was always to much a bunch of mushy feelings hidden in a grumpy (and bitter and afraid) trench coat. Dating Martin he has to hold himself so he isn't too much. He plays the grumpy unromantic guy at first. But he just can't stop giving flowers and planing dates (this is the guy that saw a theme park on a fear domain and considered how he wanted to take Martin to a romantic ferris whell date [until he discovered Martin was afraid of them]) and making all the silly things one does when in love.
TR: Martin is deep down very cynical about love but wants to/pretends to be a romantic and Jon is deep down very romantic but wants to/pretends to be cynical about love.
#that's also to say Martin is definitivaly the one forgeting important dates#wich is more complicated cause jon consider random things important#like jon has no expectation that martin will actualy do something to celebrate 'the aniversary of the first time you got me flowers'#but he will circle the date and give martin a flower and martin will go 'is this jon being silly or did i forgot our birthday again'#until jon just stops circling it on calendars so martin won't be anxious#jon is romantic enough that he is fine being the only one that rememberz#remember guys jon asked if they would find each other in every universe#jon belived he and martin would always be together#martin belived it was a miracle they were together once a great miracle but a miracle#tma#the magnus archives#martin blackwood#jonathan sims#jonmartin#jmart#teaholding
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Melanie Kinggg
#I wish Jon and Melanie could have had what Jon and Daisy temporarily had#they're besties in another universe I know it#maybe in a somewhere else AU where it's a parallel universe and Jon meets Melanie again#and she has no idea who Jon is or why he's so anxious with her at first but they can start over#PLEASE#anyway#the magnus archives#the magnus archives art#tma#tma art#tma podcast#melanie king#melanie king art#tma melanie#rusty quill#rusty quill fanart
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If this gets a two thousand notes I’ll ask my mom for a binder
GOAL REACHED no need to spam anymore
you have till may 1st (had to change it it was way to long of a time period I apologize)
go on tumblr
You can do it
I don’t believe in you
Just try not to spam reblog (keep it under 20 okay?) but tag comment to your hearts desire (but y’know….dont spam me over 50 times with comments by one person maybe? I have no doubt someone would do that)
#Wonder what mutual is gonna find this first#Maybe they won’t#And I get to stay in my little bubble of not having to be anxious about asking her#Okay I turned off reblogs it’s over we reached the goal#I don’t know how to turn off comments so I’m just gonna leave it and mute notifs for this post
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damn you history channel
#i freaked out over literally everything LOL#i guess you can only comfort an anxious child for so long#i was watching gangnam style as the calendar changed from december 12th to 13th#the day of reckoning
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