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#so you're going to feel very attached to it you're not going to want to throw it out ESPECIALLY once sunk cost fallacy kicks in
jesuistrestriste · 2 days
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girl you're literally the best writer here. Please please pleaaaaaaase can you do a part 2 of fwb Art who gets attached to you quickly 🛐 I'M BEGGING YOU
< pt 2 to this >
well.
you caved.
goddamnit, you caved quick too.
as soon as those tears spilled down his cheeks and into the crook of your neck, it was over. you wonder if maybe he weaponized his emotions a little to get you to stay, but it doesn’t really matter now, does it?
you did as he begged for you to do; you stayed the night with him. you expected that maybe he would try to have sex with you again, but it never happened.
as soon as you agreed to not go back to your own bed, he pressed kisses over your neck and held you tight. he gave you one of his loose stanford tennis tees and a pair of his boxers for you to sleep in, and then he coaxed you under the sheets. no grinding, no handsy touches, nothing.
he just laid there with you, breathing softly and comfortably as he rested his head on your chest, and fell asleep. you stared at the ceiling for most of the night just thinking ‘what the hell have i just gotten myself into’. if only you’d had the strength to refuse him before, because now you could tell he was in it.
bad.
you wake up in the morning after a night of inner turmoil and feel a comfortable weight behind you. a ghost of warmth pressed up against your back, and oh god, he’s spooning you. his arms are wrapped around your torso and his legs are tangled with yours.
you try to very quietly shift out of his hold, grabbing onto the side of his bed and pulling yourself towards it, but he just whines softly in his sleep and then tugs you right back flush to his chest. you sigh. you cave again, and let him keep you.
the both of you stay that way for another thirty minutes before art nuzzles into your shoulder and starts to stir. he presses three kisses to your neck as he sits up, and then gazes lazily down at you with lidded eyes as he takes in the sight of your features in the sunlight creeping through his blinds.
he’s only ever seen you in the dark; after parties and in response to your 1 AM bootycalls. how could he have ever gone this long without seeing you like this? the way your skin shines, the depth of the color in your irises, the little crevices and dips in your nose and cheeks and chin that make you look like you were lovingly sculpted by the hands of an artist. like you were someone’s muse.
you can see it in the way he looks down to you.
there’s going to be absolutely no (easy) way to get out of whatever you just started with him. one night changed everything. at least in his mind, you were sure of it.
he reaches a hand up and brushes his thumb over your lips, studying you before he knows you’ll turn away.
and then his lips are pressing down to yours. a soft, sweet, tender gesture that says so much more than you necessarily want from him. he only pulls back to whisper one thing, his eyes holding the same—almost nervous—vulnerability that they had the night before when he had weeped a plea into your frame.
“so..” he chews the inside of his cheek, “can i make you breakfast..?”
oh boy.
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mehiwilldoitlater · 3 days
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can you do black myth erlang shen x reader please 🥺
It hurts. Please, it hurt. Stop!
Are you even speaking? Spears and swords don't stop to fall over you, and you wonder if you can even feel pain any longer.
You just wanted them to stop.
Those are celestial guards, fighters of the gods, and they have no mercy on the mortals, especially the ones that plan to revive the great sage. And you were so unlucky to have lost your friend.
How could it have happened?! Why was it happening?! They didn't see how already in pain you were?! They keep it going, and they laugh!
You just want everything to stop; your vision is just red and dark.
Then a light strike, and you're not in pain anymore. Ah...so is here where you die? You wanted at least to say something to Yuán Fèn and Bajie, maybe a goodbye...
You didn't get the chance to end your mission. You feel bad, mostly for these things.
///
Suddenly, icy air fills your lungs.
It's sudden and painful, and it's mostly a sign that you're pretty much alive but very much hurt. You can't see properly; your vision doesn't work so well. Why can you see only with your left eye?!
You tried to reach your head with your hands but could sense only the pressure of one of them. Something is attached to your face—just the same sensation on your left hand. 
Gauzes, someone had put some bandage on your face and hand. You still tried to move your right harm, but you can't feel so much; did it fall asleep? 
You tried to put yourself up but met only a wave of more pain in both of your legs. You wanted to scream, moan, or anything, but you could only wheeze, coughing from the dryness. 
Only then you felt something—rushing movements—they were fast and so many. Many small people? Or just one thing with so many legs? You couldn't tell; wherever you were was so dark. The rush of the feet stopped when some more heavy ones got closer to you. Someone had held your head gently, raising it from the cuschion where you were, then something smooth and cold touched your lips, a bowl maybe. 
A liquid started to carefully flow in your mouth, avoiding you to suffocate or spill it. It was... so bitter. It felt awful, but your throat started to feel better. It was warm.
You tried to understand who was tending to you, so you kept looking at the looming figure. Were they talking to you? He seemed like a man by his posture and
No, it couldn't be. It must have been a dream or a sick joke. You gulped, but before you could do anything, Erland had already put you back in your bedding.
///
Oh, how much you wished that was just a delirious dream and allucination provoked by the pain. Tò be just the product of your mind, another of those visions that you had during your adventure.
Instead It was true—scarefully true.
He didn't speak too much; he didn't speak at all. He just tended to your wound, fixed the bed, made you drink that bitter liquid of his, and then went back to... something. He was just there, doing something in that desolated place. 
The house was small, very small; the only objects present there were the bed where you were recovering, some big jars, a small bundle of sheets in a corner, and a fireplace, where usually the pot mumbled and boiled something that you guess he was feeding you.
It wasn't like you couldn't do much in your state; the only thing you could do was just sleep and hope that nothing bad could happen.
And when you didn't sleep, you thought.
Why was he caring for you? He was preparing you for a formal execution? Was he planning to kill you in front of all the monkeys and Yuán Fèn? Maybe hunting you for fun?
Every time those worries started to come into your head, you felt nothing but pure fear and pain. You should have died there. It would have been merciful. 
One day you finally broke that silence, the day you realized that the absence of sensitivity in your right heart was because there was nothing there. One of the soldiers had damaged so much your harm that it was cute off.
You started to panic, to move, and to make sounds that were near a lament. Then you felt something nudging and crying next to your face, pressing and lapping, then something stronger trying to stop you.
"You need to stop; your wounds may reopen."
He seemed calm in his tone, and he kept his composure even when you started to punch him in the chest and get out of him and that place.
"Of you're in pain, tell me. So I can fix it. I have medicines, but you need to calm down."
How could you calm down?! You're hair was ripped off! You kept struggling, moving your stump against him, trying to gain anything, but nothing came to you. He realized the situation and stod up.
"Don't worry, I prepared everything."
And so he revealed, inside one of the big jars, covered in the same strange bitter medicine, your severed harm, that was still moving, imitating the movement that you were trying to do with it.
///
And so, things didn't change that much, except that he was taking your limb in a magic option, and he was taking you the same things to heal your wounds.
He said that, by mortal standard, death was inevitabile, but with that medicine he could save your harm and your eye, which you learned was lost, and he just kept it there. The creepyness of the hole organs in a jar aside, you felt like something was clearly wrong.
He was Erlang Shen! The deity that struck down Sun Wukong! The one that had officially killed him! Why was he curing you?!
You couldn't trust him; you could trust Yaoguais and all but him?! NEVER!
"Came on," he tried to make you drink again the medicine; "without it, your body will take longer and the harm won't stick."
"Firstly," you said, moving the bowl away from your."I'm not a paper doll that you can just fix with glue. And secondly, I don't trust you!"
"If I wanted to kill you, I would have done it already. Instead, I'm tending to your wounds. Is not trustful enough?"
For him, it was more like taking to a child that refused the cough syrup.
You rolled your eyes; he was right—he could have killed you, and the possibility of being dead by his hand still lingered. Your only option was to play whatever game he was playing and try to get the first chance to escape from... wherever you were. By the look of the outside, where are you back to the New West? The snow was its notable characteristic after all.
After another nudge of the deity, you finally took the bowl from his hand and swallowed in one gulp the medicine. Your face produced a grimace by the savor.
"Ugh! It's so bitter...what did you put in this staff?!"
"I don't make medicine. I take it from the celestial court."
That I take it was more similar to stealing it. But, for your own sake, you held your tongue. When made sure that all the medicine was consumed, he hummed, satisfied, and silently sat near the fireplace.
Now, with a better look, you realized that it wasn't a house per se, but a very small temple. 
"Why did you steal someone else's shrine?"
After that sentence, you thought Mayube would hear him complain about your insolence or just to tell you to shut up. Instead, he kept tending to the fire, using a long metal rod.
"I didn't steal it; it's mine."
"Yours?" You seemed perplexed. "It's so simple. I thought you had something a little more."
He chukled a little without diverting his gaze. "I don't want to attract attention."
What a strange man, you thought, and so you decided to go back to sleep. But still, one question needed an answer.
"When I was on the brink of death," you spoke between the sheets. "You were saying something. What did you say?"
He stode silently, stopped in his thought, then spoke.
"That I won't allow you to die."
///
On your surprise, you found out that one of the most tolerable things there was no one else but Xiaotian Quan, Erlan's loyal dog. Despite his scary look, the jaws that could easily rip of your head, and the fact that it was a deity, that dog was everything but pure joy.
You couldn't understand why, but it just adored you, snuggling to you when the fire died during the night, asking for food whenever its master wasn't looking. How could you resist?!
"You're so nice, you know that?"
Every time the god left the house for hunting, something you learned he did on a daily basis for all of your meals, the duty of guarding you, maybe monitoring your escape, was set on the dog. You obliged to stay in its warm, caressing his mantle and scratching his muse.
"You're very cute... I wonder if you feel lonely here. I would be, but I'm mostly bored."
You sighed, turning in the bed. You tried to avoid thinking about your state and all. Erland said that it was almost time to reattach the arm, but you still need the medicine for your legs and eye.
"I hope Yuán Fèn is all right... I hope everyone is safe. Things were getting off lately. Everything is...."
You massaged your poor eyes with your good hand.
"I really hope that Sun Wukong is worth the pain!"
You didn't want to have doubt; you wished that your faith was strong like Yuán Fèn and Bajie's, but everything was so hard. How could they just accept it? And staying there, medicated by the one that had killed that you guys were trying to revive, didn't help at all. That statement...what wnated you alive? What was his game?
Come to think of it, no one ever came to come for you—not a deity, not a celestial warrior, not a Yaoguais. It was like no one knew where you were except for the dog and Erlang. Was he hiding you? But for what reason?
You stopped thinking about it when you heard the sound of a huge deer falling to the ground and the sound of a knife starting to cut the meat. Does it really need to do it right there!? Even Bajie had so much decency to move away or wait for you and Yuán fèn to sleep!
He seemed too concentrated to care, so he kept going with his work and stopping the dog to come to him and try to take some meat for himself.
It was...almost a cute scene... Blood of the poor deer aside.
"What are you doing in this?" You finally decided to break that silence.
"You need to eat, no?"
"No, I don't..." You covered your face with your hand. "I mean this! Helping me, curing me, and all! Why?"
"I have my own motives. Wich, I prefer to keep to myself for now." He said, giving a small slice of meat to Xiaotian, letting it lick the blood from his fingertips.
"And you? You're clearly not cut out for this; what is it that you searching for in this quest of yours?"
"I just want to go home. They said that, maybe, Sun Wukong knows a way to send me back. I don't know if it's true, but it's worth the shot." 
You didn't even know why you admired it; you just said it. Maybe it wasn't such a big revelation in your head; it's not normal for someone to go back to where you belong, even if this desire wasn't so strong in recent days. He hummed and kept on cutting and putting the meat in the pot on the fire, alongside some water. He didn't say much; he just acknowledged it, you thought.
"And what if I can do that and send you home?"
Your eyes widened as you looked at the man who had just admitted that he could have done that from the beginning, like he was just telling you some directions on the road. But then suspects rose again.
"What's the catch?"
He stopped, finally looking at you, straight in your eyes.
"You stop this foolish quest of yours, alongside your friend. Give up the relics, and I'll send you back. No more fighting, a normal life."
You loved your gaze, looking at your still remaning bandage hand. He could do that; he could send you back. In front of you, stirring a suo, there's your way home ticket. And the price...
A fire started in your chest, looking at him with a newfound vigor.
"Are you basically telling me to give up?!"
"Tò surrender..."
"Then I refuse! Me, Yuán Fèn, and Bajie had made the impossible! The sacrifices that we made, what we had accomplished... NO! I will never betray my friends! I'll find my way home on my own terms!"
"And what if Wukong is not able to help you? What'll you do then?"
"Then...then I'll still search for a way! I'll never turn my back on the Destined One, NEVER!"
At this rate, you really started to fear that he could be angered by your stubbornness and loyalty towards your friend; instead, he rested quite, with a small smile on his face.
He seemed satisfied, and I kept cooking while you decided to stay silent after that outburst. He truly was something hard to get...
After a few hours, the same soup was served to you, and... It wasn't that apprising. It didn't smell bad or have a bad smell; it was just so blended with every one of your senses. It was just boiled meat in some water.
"There, eat now. You still need some energy."
You held the bowl, admiring how some good pieces of meat had gone wasted in some hot water with not even vegetables or some actual condiments. You took a sip of it; the savor was more of some dirty hot water, blood that had remained in the pot, and the disappointment of being fed like this.
"Are you sure you're a deity?" 
"What kind of question is this?"
"Because to be one, your cooking skill really stinks. Do you even know salt exists?"
At this point, you really thought that you were done. You gulped a chunk of meat, afraid to look at the face of the man, imagining how enraged he must be after hearing such an insult. You really couldn't keep your mouth shut, did you?! Why did you have to meet all those friendly deities that didn't care about status?! Now you must have angered the ONLY deity that you really didn't want to!
"Umpf, I never cooked for anyone. You try if you're that good."
You raised your eyes and...a pouty child, an kid that his mother had taken away the dough because he was making a mess with the flour. His arms crossed, offended by a remark that was true, by the way, his feet tapping the floor in a sign of nervousness, pinting out that your comment had left a mark on him, and his gaze...fixed on somewhere else in the room, maybe on his dog, enjoying its meal with the head of the deer.
Did you embarrass him?
The next day, he was able to gain some good ingredients. Some chilies, some salts and peppers, even some nice fresh onions. Where did he find them? You'll never know, but you must admit, he was quite good at following your distractions. He was careless and followed every step by your hand, and at the end of the job, he ate the soup in silence, without saying anything after that.
He must have found it quite good too.
///
"WAIT! Wait, wait, wait, please! Can't we ask someone else?!"
"No one will be able to help us. I can handle it; please stay still." He took away from the fire the long and thick needle and the silk string attached to the end of it.
"NO! At least put me to sleep! It's going to hurt like hell!" You tried to move away from the stump, only to be stopped by his hand.
"I could rip off your head; that would be more problematic than harm. I'll be fast, but you must stay still." He removed the bandages from what was left of your limb, positioning the severed arm near it.
You gasped, a small tear escaping your eye. You were scared.
He noticed his free hand handing you a piece of wood.
"In your mouth...you'll need it.". 
///
It was like you never lost it to begin with. The same medicine was now an ointment to apply, and he reattached them to help the regrow of the lost parts. Your legs started to feel better too; you could walk with his help or a cane. Xiatian too was a nice helper in that case, being your support and all when you regain your ability to move.
But you were really bored.
"And what...is this?" He motioned towards the numbers of some mini-Snowman, tall as a doll, that you were stilkl making around.
"I don't like talking to you, so I made some company from myself."
"Ah..." he silently reached you, sitting at your side but never disturbing your work.
"They are people that you know?"
"All of them—me and Yuán Fèn—had met them in our journey. Some of them are good; some of them needed the right way; others are lost."
All of them were made with the same round shape, making them similar, but each one had at least one feature that made it different and special. He pointed out one with some small detail on the face.
"Who's the one there?"
"The third spider sister! She's just so nice, you know? They all have the right to hate us, but she's quite the mediator! She loves poetry, and her dresses are so lovely! I like to talk with her; she kind of likes humans!"
"Oh, the spider Yaoguai...and the big one there?"
"The second prince of the flowing sand. He's sad, but he's always nice to me. I hope he can recover soon with his brother."
"I see...and the destine done?"
"Here!" You held pridefully the small snowman, a stick in his hand, and a happy face. So near to your feet, it must have been the first one you had made.
"You really care for him..." 
"I do! He's my friend! ...a very...good friend." He had noticed that silent spark that screamed to be freed from the bounds of morality and friendship. You too were bound after all.
"Well, they're not perfect, but here they are! All my friends! I hope they're fine."
"And where are you? Where's the Bián huá?"
"Oh...me, eh?... I'm not that cool like them. I can just be the one who makes the funny little snowman."
He raised his eyebrow, noticing how little of yourself you were talking. He raised his hand, moving the snow like a whirlwind. The snow, by moving, was forming a small sculpture with your exact semblance.
"....Show off." You blunter out.
///
"And so, my uncle decided to leave the quarry and let it go."
Your laugh echoed in the small shrine. Erlang never noticed how genuine it was before that night.
"You're terrible! I can't believe they ask of all people but you to take care of Wukong!"
"Well," he said, drinking some wine, "I was the only one with enough power to do so, and..." he chuckled, smiled, looking to the ground, and sighed, "He and I... we were so similar. I know no one could have ever bested me, but him."
The words he said, you wonder, how many times he hopes to express those feelings to someone but never finds the right one? How long he kept those weights on his chest? When he talked, he didn't sound like someone full of glory and of himself for defeating one of the strongest warriors in the universe; he seemed sad, melancholic, and regretful.
"Were you friends?"
"...I guess we were." He then aptted your shoulder.
There, something moved in your head. Everything changed; you were no more on that mountain; the shrine had become a vast expanse of clouds; so many people around you—the same that had hurt you.
There were some... no, they couldn't be the Yaoguasi king?! Why were they there?! And...Erlang...why he's covering his hand?
"You have to go to sleep now; you still need to rest."
And, without being able to express anything, he left you there, asking yourself what you just saw.
/// 
The day passed; your body came back to your old vigor, but something was different that day. The air was thick, the snow was falling, and Erlang Shen, after so many days, had finally started to show more emotions than his natural calmness. He was waiting for something.
"Erlang?" You spoke to him, observing how connected he was in front of the fire. Xiaotian was near him, waiting for something like its master.
"About me... sending you home... forgive my lie, dear one. I do not know how to do that."
You were just reaching him to his small spot, near the fire place that he had started in the courtyard, when you stopped in your tracks after hearing him. What? Was that a lie?
"A...lie?...w-why did you?"
"Many before you came... and all of them were swawed away from this path...but you..." His kind eyes met yours. "You surprised me many, many times here."
It was... a test? He was testing your faith. Your trust in the Destined one? And then again, he kept silent, thinking about these weeks alone with you.
You befriended many Yaoguai, chosen kindness. You, that stode in the center of the storm, still believed so little of yourself.
You were a shining star, not knowing how important you were. You started to be important for many... and for him. But this... this is another story.
"Time is near, Bián huá. He's coming, calling by your bounds and your destiny."
"Wh's co-" you realized. Your eyes started to water, remembering about your precious friend that you never, not even a single moment, had stopped hope he could find you.
"Yes," he smiled at you. "This is our last time together."
"I still have so many questions! I need to know! I...i...." those visions. He was his friend. What did he hide that faithful day?! 
"You'll have your answers... as his own."
Sound of steps in the snow. Someone was running, despite the ice, despite the cold. His fluffy tail, his strong and determined eyes.
Yuán Fèn.
"Keep cover, Y/N. You really don't want to see this fight."
///
That wasn't a fight.
You saw your friend fight—that wasn't one—and you couldn't even say that you were in your right mind because, for the first time, you didn't want a winner, nor a loser.
At the end of the fight, you don't know what happened, but light engulfed you, just like the day Erlang saved you from those celestial warriors.
When the light dimmed, you weren't on the snowy mountain anymore.
The warm light of spring danced between the branches of the plum blossoms; the wind slowly hummed between the trees, the grass tickling your feet. The sound of a creek, the chirping voices of the birds...where you even in the mortal realm. And...he was there.
Your normal gourmet was now an intricate Hanfu, pink like the flowers of the plum trees. He smiled a gentle smile; you questioned if it was real or just a product of your imagination.
"...where....are we?"
"I thought you would like some colors."
He remembered you as a prince and you as a princess, one that wondered if she was supposed to fit in her role. He held your hand, asking you one last time...to trust him.
Slowly, your fingers intertwined together, and there you saw it, another vision...
The truth.
You're hands still together, he held so strongly, afraid to lose these last moments. Your eyes start to water again. Small droplets of tears shined through the light.
"You...you and him...you planned it...all this time you..."
"He was a foolish one...to believe that a status could grant him freedom..." he chuckled, a bitter one like his medicines. "And yet... maybe... I too wanted something like that... yet I never had that kind of courage to do so."
Your throat was close, your legs trembled, and he was there, ready to catch you.
"....You..." Hiccups prevented you from formulating more words, but you couldn't stop. "You...suffered..all alone..all this time..I could never."
You couldn't hold it anymore, but his strong arm girded around you, trying to bring an inch of comfort to your heart. You figured out everything, and what you could only feel now was the immense sadness of his own story.
A friend for him, but a villain for many.
"The Bián huá... meant to change the circle... who could have guessed that even with me, you could find some kindness in the end?"
"NO!" Your hand gripped his white clothes. "You've...you've done it for him! You're not evil! You're not like them!"
He sighed,
sad smile on his face. He revealed your face to the light, caressing the eye that he tended with care. A flower appeared in your hair—a small plum flower, white and pure.
"As I would love to fight him over this treasure... this fight has already been won."
"What...what's going to happen now?"
"My dear, your journey...as his own...is only beginning."
And while everything faded, his lips seemed so soft, like those petals.
He still needs to steal something from him.
///
"I can't understand you! Your plan did work! Then why are you still moping around?!"
After the great fight, only Nezha decided to go and meet the sacred divinity.
"Little brother..." said Erlang in a sad tone. "You couldn't understand..."
The young one looked at his own senior...then gasped.
"Erlang...did you just..."
He didn't respond. He just held that flower and a small statue made of snow.
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I love the way you write Logan, it's so comforting! Can't wait to see more of your work, it's lovely💗
Idk if this would be your thing so feel free to ignore obviously!
How do you think Logan's dynamic would be with a reader having intense intimacy issues, to the point where they struggle to even think about doing anything more than make out with him? I really haven't found any fic like that and I think that you would a concept like that more than justice
I do see him having some intimacy issues himself (traumatized wet cat💀)
this is so sweet, thank you so much! My brain immediately supplied a list of head canons, I hope that you enjoy <3
~ So I am thinking about Logan from the original trilogy for these in particular ~ He definitely has some intimacy issues, more so on the emotional intimacy side than physical intimacy ~That is, until he meets you. You're a professor at the school, and while he can tell you love the young mutants with a large part of your heart, you remain physically distant from them. When the Youngers ones reach for a hug, you meet them instead with a fist bump or a high five. Never cruel, but always setting your boundary. ~The first time you catch him noticing your habit, you expect him to roll his eyes, or hit you with a judgy side eye. Instead, he quirks his head and resumes what he had previously been doing. ~Eventually, the two of you start spending a lot more time together. He will nudge a cup of coffee your way, and ask after you when you have a headache. He never encroaches on your space, despite being quite touchy with the other faculty.
~You spend a week working up the courage to confront him about it, strategizing the best way to ask for the reassurance you want but have trouble asking for. You expect him to blow you off, but when you knock on his door, he ushers you inside and lets you choose where to sit in the room, choosing his seat to be close enough to show he is invested but far enough away for your comfort. It isn't even a conscious thought for him, it's natural. ~You fumble through your question, doing your best to explain your line of thinking, before eventually just spitting out "do you hate me?" ~He is so shocked that he doesn't know what to say for a few seconds, which only makes your anxiety feel worse. ~He takes a few seconds, collecting his thoughts, and then you can see the typical Logan smirk start sparkling in his eye again. "Sweetheart, it's a little hard to hate the person you're acting a fool over". Your eyes practically bug out of your skull, and he chuckles to himself. He is twitching in his seat, and you can tell he is trying his best to not gather you up in his arms. ~You extend a hand out to him, palm upturned. He takes it instantly. He raises your entwined hands halfway towards his mouth, before meeting your eyes and waiting for your reaction. ~You nod, holding your breath and he drops a kiss on the back of your hand, before adjusting so that he can kiss your palm as well. ~When he hears your heartbeat stutter, he is quick to hold your hand again, resting against his knee. He confirms that you feel the same way, insistent on getting verbal confirmation. Your face feels like it is on fire, but you reply in the affirmative. "We are going to take this as slow as you need. I... I care about you so much, and your comfort always comes before anything else." ~You feel a few tears well up, and he moves to wipe them away as they begin to fall. Again, he pauses before actually making contact with your face, waiting for your gentle nod. ~From that day on, you are even more attached at the hip than before. Logan loves knowing that you are with him for more than his body, and he is constantly making sure that you know how much he values you. ~Overall, I just imagine him being very sweet and understanding and taking it as slow as you need. He is protective of you when you meet new people, often coming in between you and others who are not as considerate as he thinks they should be. Definitely sends his protective instincts into a bit of an overdrive, but you also appreciate having the scary dog privilege when you are out in public as well. People are definitely giving you a wider berth than you are used to. You always feels safe and taken care of with him, which is exactly how he wants it to be
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rosenclaws · 13 hours
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hello!! do you have any thoughts on what Eddie Alden is like in bed?
also you're my favorite author on tumblr 😁
omg thank you anon!! AND YES FINALLY I CAN TALK ABOUT EDDIEEEE
warnings: MINORS DNI!!!, afab!reader, fingering, riding, Eddie is flirtyy
Sex with Eddie Alden headcanons
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Okay Eddie is a little slutty and you know what that is okay. I mean god he’s so hot in that movie i’m actually obsessed with him.
He’s a total fucking flirt oh my god. Flirty words and very flirty touches. He’s the kind of guy to put his hand next to your head and lean in close and smile with his stupid perfect teeth.
Even though he’s insanely cocky he can really back it up in bed. I mean first he’s insanely hot like god 2001 Hugh Jackman is insane.
He starts out with a make out session. His hands slipping under your clothes, touching and squeezing every bit of skin he can get.
When I say cocky I mean really fucking cocky.
“Making all those sounds for me baby?”
That man is relentless. He guides you back against every damn surface of his place. The kitchen counter, the wall, the door, and finally his bed. He 100% sticks his hand into your pants btw. Like unbuttons your pants with skill and sticks his hand in your panties.
His fingers are fucking magic. They’re thick and long and fuck he knows how to use them. He goes slow at first to tease you. He 100% makes you beg for it.
“You need what? Use your words.”
After he makes you come on his fingers and makes you scream his name he gets undressed and fuck is he HOT. I’m sorry I just can’t get enough of Eddie.
I think he likes a variety of positions. Doggy, missionary, prone bone, against the wall. I mean you name it.
He also has a praise kink but it’s more you praising him. He lives for how much he can make you scream.
He’s rougher for sure but can also give it nice and slow. Mostly to be a tease. I think he’s a big ass guy. Like checking out your ass every time you walk by him. So I think he likes positions where you're on your stomach mostly.
Okay low key I don't think he's big on kissing in bed at first because it's almost too intimate for him. Like yeah he just made out with you but looking you in your eyes and kissing while he's balls deep is a little too much connection for him.
He's scared of getting attached and that's why he has so many one night stands.
He's also a massive talker. Like he cannot shut up once he's inside of you holy. Won't stop telling you how good you feel and taunting you too. Asking if you feel good, asking if its too much and if he's too big.
He can also go for multiple rounds too. Like just give him a cigarette and 10 minutes and he's back watching you ride him.
OH FUCK RIDING EDDIE WHILE HE SMOKES. Jesus that sounds so fucking hot.
He'd thrust up roughly at random times too just to keep you on your toes. Smirk when you whine at him to quit it (you absolutely don't want him to stop).
He can't stop watching where your cunt just sucks up his dick over and over again. He also lets you steal a couple drags of his cigarette.
After a while I think he'd get impatient and switch positions so he could rail the living daylights out of you.
He may not be ready for emotional connection but he'll be dammed if he doesn't give some good after care. There's a reason people keep ending up in his bed alright.
I want this man so badly it's insane.
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r0-boat · 2 days
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Hello there! Can i request a Lycaon nsfw with a fem neko reader?
if its not too much trouble, maybe like a slight prey/predictor with some biting??
Von Lycaon Headcannons with a Cat Thiren!S/O
Von Lycaon x Fem!Reader. Hi I went a little crazy...
Cw: Nsfw, biting, size kink, knotting, heats/Rutts, predator/prey, breeding.
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You're so small. So tiny and cute, Lycaon always catches himself staring at you, and he must desperately pull himself away. But this is normal. It is usual for Von Lycaon to be so enamored with you that he's practically attached to you by the hip. However, recently, it's been different. Some kind of scent clinging to you makes him drool; it's sweet yet savory, faint yet strong. When it hits his nose, he gets dizzy and wants more. He could feel himself beginning to salivate at the delectable scent, which he had to stop himself from doing. He can't be drooling on the job or in front of you.
The urges bubbling up inside him are beginning to scare him. The images of your tail wrapping around his hand as he pulls your body into him, His big hand gently petting your small ear before choking you while he makes you scream on his cock. Making you mew and cry out when he sinks his teeth into your body is as clear as crystal.
He's always had thoughts about having you underneath him, like any man would. But this wasn't just sexual desire. It was more than that something primal and deep, something that turned him into more of an animal. He's always taken pride in self-control but now, every time he looks at you, he wants to throw it all away.
He understands now; He has been on his own suppressants for as long as he can remember; maybe that's why he's having such a primal reaction to your scent. He was so careless to avoid you. He's still holding back even now as you knew and beg him to touch you, fuck you. This tail is wagging, and he's drooling, but he's still gentle as he asks you if you're sure. You just want his knot inside you, and you command him to claim you. "As you wish," He growls as he takes you into the sheets, grabbing you full force to manhandle your body. Fully letting go of all restraint.
He feels terrible for trying to avoid you, But he feels like that. He's almost at his limit, And he is scared of what he might do to you if he slips even once. But you had other plans, feeling the heat in your core bubble over. You needed him more than ever since your first heat is in forever. It's going to hit you like a truck, and you need him.
Sure, the two of you had sex before, but this was different. Von Lycaon was always a gentleman in and out of bed making sure to treat you like glass. Which you loved however, this is not what you needed. Every Thiren knows that heat/rut sex is very different from the regular thing.
His big hands grab at your wrists; His red eyes glaze down at you like a piece of steak. You could hardly even recognize him in this desperate and feral state, and you loved it.
He has full control over your body, moving you like a rag doll until his naked hips are against yours. His hard monstrous cock is ready to penetrate you with force. You're already so wet from your heat. He doesn't need to prep you. Part of him doesn't even want to.
Your tiny cunt squeezes around his massive knotted cock as you hear him pant incoherent words, "Fill you up." "Mine." "So perfect." He growls about his big knot filling you up as he digs his teeth into your shoulder, his claws digging into your hips as he forces you deeper, causing you to take his knot.
Feeling you milk his cock with every vise grip squeeze your calm coating his cock; von Lycaon howls as you feel spurt after spurt of pent-up cum.
He's still coming even after the two of you finish. Who knows how long he needed this? Even as you lay there, Your heat satisfied, for now, he's not done his knot deflates, but his cock is still hard. He holds you close to his chest, letting out a whimper as he mutters in your ear, "I-I feel it... My rut, why is it here? "
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oh-no-its-bird · 2 days
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hi listen i just had a divine intervention or smth lmk if you don't like it but
what if your team Ro time travel au + my time travel Tobirama
Team Ro would have memories of the canon and they got to this different timeline and there's Tobirama actively trying to seduce Uchiha fucking Madara. They didn't teach THAT in the Academy
They got in the time when Tobirama still orchestrated meetings, but Butsuma is already dead so if everything goes well, Tobirama would get Madara and peace soon.
And then there suddenly spawn a Hatake with a sharingan with 2 Uchiha kids and a Mokuton user. Political nightmare.
Later Tobirama recognises Kakashi and was like "The fuck? It's that Hatake from the war. What is he doing there, he should not have been born yet!!"
OHHH THATS SO GOOD THO???
I'm gonna be real I love the concept of "team ro time travel au but they time travel into someone else's time travel au," that's so good
If we go with your au, there's a really interesting immediate aspect of like: hey ! Tobirama might recognize Kakashi or maybe even Tenzo from the war, but these guys are way fucking younger than when they met !!!
Idk what exactly can be done with that but it's interesting to consider. Also Tobirama talked ab Itachi and his crimes before I'm p sure? So like he knows what happens to the Uchiha and that it was Itachi who did it for the village. I wanna see him faced w the kid who he once praised for slaughtering his own clan to prove his loyalty.
I wanna see him feel the consequences of the stress Itachi is under when he (and possibly Shisui) attempt to kill Madara.
Stop interfering with his fix it fic you brats!! He's already got it covered!! You're just causing a mess!!!!
They get zapped in, like, in the middle of Tobirama's happy ending epilogue too. Tobirama is peacefully eating dinner in his house w his new husband Madara thinking "well. Alls well that ends well." Then BOOM Kakashi Shisui Itachi and Tenzo crash out of fucking nowhere directly onto their table, getting covered in food and breaking the table in half
Immediatley arrested !! I feel like Tobirama would instantly understand what happened by recognizing their uniforms + potentially Kakashi + he's already a time traveler himself so it's really no stretch for him to go "oh fuck I didn't think we'd get a double jepordy in this bitch but I guess not"
But like it's not like he can just SAY that ? Or he could but it would bring a lot of questions he probably does not want to answer.
Now another problem arises in like. I don't think Tobirama is especially attached to any of these guys. I can see him maybe having a lingering "pay it forward ig" feeling just bc they're "loyal konoha soldiers" and it'd be a waste to let that resource just burn. But also like. Under no circumstances can Tobirama have these guys share certain aspects of future knowledge.
Tobirama worked so hard to get here !!!! Literal years of planning !!!! He got his happy ending and it very much rests on Madara staying safe and sane and NO ONE IMPLYING HE WILL BETRAY KONOHA EVER !!!!! Tobirama does not even wanna RISK that becoming a rumor, he will take no chances.
Anyways I think his best course of action would be to reveal himself as a time traveler specifically to team ro, then position himself as their hokage who they should remain loyal to, say that it is for Konoha's best interests that they do not reveal certain things, and play it by ear from there.
Tobirama deciding he can't risk team ro going forward in time again and potentially fucking up the time stream or smthn. They need to stay here. He can not risk losing this shit. Sorry guys it looks like your trapped here <3
Anyways team ro being scary loyal to him bc he is the closest approximation to their (current?) Hokage and only person w the knowledge to enforce that power over them (at this time)
In my original post, like, all of team ro are already established to be kind of at their worst and most loyal to the village at that point to. They are at THE age(s) to be manipulated like that tbh, rip
It's not too bad tho. I think Itachi would feel relieved but also very guilty. Shisui too. Tenzo is violently neutral bc hes still in his "learning to be a real boy" phase from root, but it's all positive for him tbh. Kakashi is tricky bc his mental state is the equivalent of someone rapidly bouncing a ball on a thin pane of glass trying to prove it's bullet proof (it's not) and has like MOUNTAINS of complexes around the words "konoha authority figure" and what he's leaving behind. He's probably the most determined to go back
Anyways uhh. Izuna gets Itachi to help him be skeptical of Tobirama and spy on him. Itachi only agrees bc he violently reminds him of Sasuke (this will develop into a complex if not stopped. Shisui is working on it.)
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yanderes-galore · 3 days
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Could I request a romantic yandere alphabet for Rennala (Elden Ring), please?
🕊�� anon
I researched her and Elden Ring lore the best I could. Sorry if she seems OOC. I sort of see her as a platonic yandere and I couldn't find much personality-wise. However, I hope the wait was worth it. I had to end up changing the pairing to general due to her :( I'm so sorry... girl is messed up in the head, she probably can't see the difference at this point.
Yandere Alphabet - Rennala
Pairing: Platonic/Romantic
Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Isolation, Kidnapping, Manipulation, Regression, Delusional behavior, Dark themes, Forced "relationship"/companionship.
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Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?
Rennala is a tragic character in Elden Ring. After her husband leaving her (That portion gets complicated) and her being locked away in the Grand Library at the academy... she's lost her mind. Rennala appears as a calm individual, but her studies into Reincarnation magic and her isolation have rot her mind.
She's reincarnated many of the Juvenile Scholars who used to attend the academy to the point they have no memories. The way she treats others seems to be that of a mother. She struggles with attachment as when her husband left, so did her heart.
Rennala seems like she'd isolate her obsession. You'd either be a Scholar or Tarnished. Her affection would be soft... but smothering.
The Full Moon Queen is determined to not lose another. She's already lost her husband, perhaps even some of her "Sweetings". Which means she'd keep you locked away and smothered like a mother's love.
She clings to you like she does her amber egg. You are never far from the royal queen. Her affection and touch is soft... but oppressive.
Even if her feelings are romantic towards you, you're often coddled. It's as though that's the only way she can cope with her losses. You'll be kept right by her side...
Even if magic must be used to keep things that way.
Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?
Rennala is strong but she seems more defensive and reclusive. She's capable of getting her hands dirty. However, she chooses not to, instead preferring to isolate you.
Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?
You'd probably be treated like one of her "Sweetings". She clearly has a stronger connection with you... but treats you the same. Even if you were a Tarnished, she'd probably have you locked away in her library (Maybe with Ranni's help-).
She would never mock you. You are her beloved, the one that fills the void where her heart once was. She'd never want to hurt you.
Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?
Rennala is mostly passive. She isn't too forceful, just clingy and smothering. The only thing against your will is your inability to leave the library.
Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?
I imagine quite a lot. Rennala is a vulnerable woman after her husband left. Once she finds someone to fill the void, I highly doubt she's letting them go. She's very vulnerable with you when she holds you.
Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?
I have a feeling Rennala is delusional in a way. She probably wouldn't view you fighting back as, well, fighting back unless you were heavily armed. She wouldn't understand it and would instead try to soothe you with soft words.
When in reality... you just want to leave... you don't want to be soothed... it really makes you feel like some petulant child. Even if you're so much more than that to her.
Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?
Not a game and she does not enjoy escape.
Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?
It's definitely either the isolation... or the regression that would come eventually. I would not doubt Rennala would reincarnate her obsession to keep them beside her. Subconsciously, she wants you reliant on her.
If you're reliant... You'll never leave her... You'll be hers forever.
Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?
Considering her mental state, it's most likely her wanting to cling to you for all of eternity through consistent cycles of reincarnation to keep you hers.
Dark, isn't it?
Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?
Not really, she's too delusional to experience jealousy with you since you both are isolated. Even if she was, she seems like she'd quietly cope.
Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?
Calm and quiet, often talking to you in a hushed tone. Due to her past she has trouble showing love properly. Which means she's usually clinging to you tightly and pressing soft kisses to your head like you're her precious egg. You're never outside of the library, yet allowed to read within it.
She's always watching you...
Ready to love her Sweeting with all of her heart (or what she has left of it....).
Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?
There isn't really any courting unless you two met before she lost her mind. Even then, she doesn't cling until she loses her husband. After that... "courting" is just "isolation".
Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?
Not really except she clings to you more than others. She's usually calm and soft-spoken all the time.
Naughty: How would they punish their darling?
The only thing that comes to mind for me is forced reincarnation. All in an attempt to weed out any fight or disobedience. Love with her gets complicated.
Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?
I would assume all of them, even if she doesn't realize it.
Patience: How patient are they with their darling?
Extremely patient. Isolation does that to people.
Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?
Honestly? Is it possible for her to be worse mentally than she already is? She probably either couldn't lose you due to her hold on you... or would be too delusional to notice.
Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?
No and she could never let you go.
Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?
Definitely the mass amount of trauma her story has (Husband abandoning her, academy betraying her...). That's what caused her attachment issues... among other things.
Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?
She'd soothe you like she usually does, even if it makes you cry harder. She doesn't understand your pain. She just sees you crying and thinks soft touches and kisses will fix it.
Soon you may just forget why you're crying.
Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?
SKIPPED.
Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?
I can't really... think of one. Honestly, even if you tried to exploit a weakness of hers, would Ranni let you?
Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?
Not intentionally.
Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?
I suppose in a way you could consider her nature worshipping. She'd do anything to keep the one she loves beside her. Even if it means giving them the magic equivalent of a lobotomy.
Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?
There's no pining. She just... latches on the moment she sees you.
Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?
Unintentionally.
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aayakashii · 3 days
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Excuse me, tumblr user aayakashii, but if I could ask for a morsel of content? I made a post about king jin x court jester reader and mentioned how it would be an interesting yandere dynamic. Your name got mentioned, and then I also saw you had liked it, so if you had any thoughts? That? Would be cool?
But absolutely no pressure! I was just curious about what a yandere dynamic would look like when jin is obsessed with someone who does fit the servant role.
Sorry for the rambling! Thank you for reading my request, and I hope it finds you well! And please feel free to go as dark as you want with it if the mood strikes you
-@lucky-lucky-duck☆ (user name change ^^")
Of course tumblr user @lucky-lucky-duck 🫡
Okay I had to think looooong and haaaaard about this one because it's an interesting concept, but, as you said, it can turn dark very quickly. I'm not sure if I analyzed it properly tbh, but I hope this gives you a nice idea of how I think the dynamic would go.
First, Jin as a yandere in his usual setting would probably be an extremely controlling man. He'd demand MC to be at his beck and call at any given moment and would probably tell them what they can or cannot do, what to wear, what to say, basically how exist as "his property".
I've had someone say that it's a bit upsetting that the boys as yanderes see MC as an object to possess, but that's just how most yanderes act; they might love their darling, but most of all, they're obsessed – they want to possess them. It's the nature of a yandere character, so I'd have to say Jin would be the blueprint for that.
Now, in that king x court jester dynamic, things would escalate A LOT MORE.
I researched the accurate definition of what a jester used to do, and they used to be "a member of the household of a nobleman or a monarch employed to entertain guests during royal court."
Okay, well. Forget about entertaining other people. You'd be Jin's personal plaything, and no one else would be allowed to watch your lovely acts. And of course, that would allow him to demand more intimate ways of entertainment too...
You'd have to be ready to be his pillow; to light his cigarettes; to smother him in kisses and sweet words whenever he got stressed; to follow him around wherever he went like a loyal puppy; and, just like one, he'd expect you to never complain.
You're the king's favorite, how dare you complain about not being free? You have privileges no other jester could ever have!
And what if the king had a queen? Well, that would not matter at all. You'd still be tied to him, even if he was married to someone. The king's consort would sit beside him, but you'd be perched on his lap, petting his hair and being entirely open to his touches.
You're just a jester after all, and he's the king. No one bats an eye, even as he holds you so possessively.
Jin would be quicker to ditch his consort than let go of you, but he would rather not admit it.
If anyone wants to marry him, they have to understand that he's just too attached to his little pet. See, they're so cute, so entertaining, so welcoming to his touches. How could he ever let them go?
Basically, being the king's jester would be akin to having a collar and a leash on your neck forever. The most powerful man would be able to move mountains just to have you under his constant watch. You'd have no freedom, and his obsession would be overlooked. You'd have no one to save you and nowhere to run.
But that's what you wanted, right?
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soonhoonsol · 8 months
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you ever feel so sad whenever someone leaves your life?
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leatherbookmark · 10 months
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ootd features the words "black dress" in its lyrics and people are like oh! this is a reference to another group's song, "black dress"!
i'm unwell.
#shrimp thoughts#also 'you people just Don't Understand' part 2: apparently there will be Part Two. just like with gee idle's allergy and queen/card#which. lol. apparently 'when allergy came out people were shocked because the it was basically 'if you're ugly tough shit just get a#surgery' but once queen/card came out everything was clear!' and like. how was it clear. what was clear.#one song is 'boo hoo i'm so ugly i hate looking at myself in the mirror and no one likes me i should get plastic surgery'#and the other is like 'ya hoo i'm so hot and sexy i'm like these two western celebrities!!!! i'm so cool i'm twerking on the runway'#kp/op kinda sucks balls in that it's like.... musical equivalent of tjlc crossed with marvel. it's basic ass pop made to sell except with a#faux deep garnish. and sometimes the garnish stands on its own! like if you take guerrilla it's clear that there's actually no deeper or#more detailed philosophy behind it. it's not really n.o where the 'rebellion' was actually supposed to be against something concrete#it's like. we want to feel! we don't want... not to feel! but the sound and visuals are strong enough that you don't mind it#like fuck yeah the lads are staging a revolution now! and now they're outlaws in a western! sort of! and now it's alice in wonderland!#but v often the companies actively make use of the fact that kp/op stans will obsessively look for Depth and Serious Themes in their#cultural reset slaying sotys. a girl looks at a butterfly? oh the song is about having an identity crisis like in that one poem about a guy#dreaming about being a butterfly. it's actually very deep and you can see it was all planned because there was a little butterfly icon#above the tracklist. and the fans get so attached to their headcanons theories and interpretations that they don't stop for a second#to check if there was anything in the 'text' in the first place#remember that one magritte post? this is also how kp/op stans interpret things. she wears a blue dress here and blue is the color of summer#and summer is when you have holidays and don't have to go to school! so by this blue dress she's trying to say that you should love#yourself and strive to be the best version of yourself by embracing your hobbies and extracurricular interests. this is so genius 😭
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boilingheart · 2 years
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most important thing i've learned through my years of drawing is YOU DON'T HAVE TO KEEP THE FIRST DRAFT/ATTEMPT. if it doesn't feel right just throw it away! try again! just kill it! try again! 9/10 trying again gets me the results than just cleaning the first one over and over.
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this already feels a lot better. the first one felt like she was floating but when i decided to just stop trying to fix it and just start over, i got IMMEDIATE results.
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elytrafemme · 1 year
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the vast majority of the reason why i’ve abstained from getting a professional diagnosis is practical-- i already have a therapist (she just doesn’t like to diagnose, it’s not part of her practice but within her qualifications). it would fuck up my insurance in the long-term and complicate other systemic processes. i don’t need medication nor do i need accommodations so having a diagnosis wouldn’t really help me. it opens the floor to traumatic experiences, will likely cost a lot of money, and would again be trapped on my record for years upon years. 
but jesus christ, i wish i had half the confidence that other people can have with self-diagnosis. because even if i have my therapist basically stating that she thinks bpd explains several of my symptoms, and having said that the best way to explain my experiences to other people is by using bpd as a reference, i still cannot wholly convince myself that this is the issue. and i have researched for years and years so it isn’t that, i just. i need someone to look me in the eyes and tell me but if i get that, i get the rest of this too.
#nightmare.personal#it's also hard with BPD because. and i'm not saying this in a way of like ohhh haha it wasn't that bad [was objectively awful]#my childhood by any objective measurement Was Not Terrible#like yeah i have disorganized attachment patterns but that's iffy. it was non-abusive. things weren't great but they were damn good.#stuff just got messy once i turned eleven but by then you're basically old enough for that to not matter as much#but even then like. things are consistently Not Horrible for me i have lived a remarkably lucky life#and like there's the missing puzzle piece of it all but i'm beginning to suspect that whatever i imagine i repressed never truly happened#and if it did it wouldn't matter i'm never going to remember. so the point is like#yes the symptoms track yes it is the best explanation i've found to this#but there are still holes in this diagnosis and i'm never going to feel secure in it#and i'm exhausted and i just want to know that i have some kind of explanation#because even if it causes people to treat me kind of shitty at least they know why i act like this#but if that's not the right explanation and i have to go back to square one#having no kind of reasoning behind why i act so uncharacteristic very suddenly or why i get really hostile apropos of nothing#and then send you texts threatening sh before messaging again like hey do u wanna see this funny video#getting into relationships and treating them icily before jumping in so deep that they become my everything#i can't go back to the time where there was nothing to explain it. where people just didn't know why i acted like this#but i don't know if i've reached an actual explanation or if i'm just desperately searching for anything to fix this#and if anyone could tell me objectively in a way that i believed. that might destroy me but it could also fix this#neg#God i'm exhausted
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negativity ahead be cautious
is feeling indescribably shitty every single day even more so than normal for the past three months seasonal depression even if there are only 2 seasons in your country
#repressed anger is a b#i think i am gonna reach my limit for this half of the year very soon#anger management issues + avoidant attachment style is like the most bad person thing ever#i mean if you have those you're not a bad person don't listen to me#i am so tired#my eczema and gastrointestinal issues are flaring up like crazy#which means my anxiety is getting worse and worse because it's the only reason i have so many physical health issues in the first place#senior year is effing me up#and i have the shittiest most anger-inducing history teacher known to man replacing my old history teacher#who wants us to do group presentations to cover the entire fucking rest of the syllabus that my old teacher didn't cover#because this fossil is so lazy to teach that everytime she enters the class it's a 50/50 chance that she gives a “back in my days” lecture#for either half the class or the entire class#i genuinely cannot even tolerate my parents anymore#it was easier to suck it up back when i didn't have many issues#but now i genuinely can't hold myself back from snapping at them#now the least hostile route i can go is feigning ignorance#ignoring them and trying not to appear in their line of sight#or staying in my room for as long as possible so I don't have to make contact with them#okay maybe it is my fault that my stomach literally eats itself every day#but if it helps me not unalive myself then i gotta do what i gotta do if ya know what i mean#can't i just sleep for the entire year#i bet my friends hate me for not replying to their texts for weeks#i was sleeping is such a shitty excuse#but i do sleep 16 hours a day#i genuinely can't do anything so i avoid everything by sleeping#the sound of my mom's voice amplified by the small space in the car actually triggers me#i hate it so fucking much when people sexualise arlecchino#she is not someone low scum like you can touch#and i think I've just been sucking up other people's negativity like a negativity vacuum#because my empathetic ass can't stand to see someone suffering without feeling their emotions
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shidoukanae · 3 months
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I would like to make an addendum to this piece with the new chapter out and say that I was wrong about Phillip, he's great, 10/10 he went from being a giant red flag of a character to being genuinely relatable and man do i feel bad about side-eyeing him for that line he said last chapter
Also this chapter finally wrapped up another plot thread I was waiting for it to return to and waaaaaah seeing someone else's POV on Helene is so nice (and we finally got another flashback of OG Helene for like,, the first time in literally forever). Helene being called out as a lonely person who hides her kind feelings behind a cold expression...man suddenly my fondness for Helene is increasing thousandfold
Like literally how the fuck does this manga keep making Helene better and better there's literally nothing disappointing about her character and im STILL shook about it
#The Mighty Extra#no fully colored art today gotta process my feelings over the Helene bits in today's chapter LMAO#Helene continuously getting the best treatment in this story utterly shocks me as someone who is too used to seeing female characters in-#shounen-esque ending up as wasted potential fgkjggfkj#Helene is literally so perfect as a character i love her i love her i love her I LOVE HER I LOVE-#i don't draw Helene enough to show it outwardly but rest assured she occupies 99% of my current brain capacity 24/7#also the way I went from going “oh god why are you like this” to Phillip to “ohhh OHHHH okay no i get it you're very baby” is very funny#that last line makes complete sense for Phillip and it's so cool to see him show off a lot of character development in one go#for a character who is relatively minor i love how the creator made him really understandable and sympathetic like damn#i don't usually care for second lead male LIs but Phillip is surprisingly a strong and endearing character#so much so i think he's now going to forever be embedded in my mind as what a well written character looks like#me before 77: ehhh im not sure if im as excited for this chapter as the next few bc it's probs just gonna end up as#Phillip just being an ass and Fian being jealous about him#this fucking manga every goddamn time i doubt it: hey so want to learn more about Helene and see Phillip get massive character development-#that shows how mature he's gotten but also go back to several plot threads and mysteries and showcase how Lyla is severely in danger and th#war that Fian is starting is something that legitimately needs to happen to keep her safe and also here's a OG Helene flashback that-#you totally haven't been craving for promising to return to why Lyla shipped Helene/Fian in the first place and why she feels guilty about-#taking Fian from Helene (and also suggests Helene deeply loved Fian in the OG timeline which is one big awwwwWWWW and now it kind of-#sucks that Lyla DID rip Fian away from Helene but hey at least Helene has Paris now instead (oh the irony))#fun fact i actually kind of do ship Fian/Helene#at least the OG versions of them#idk seeing how attached Fian is to Lyla and imagining him doing the same to OG Helene is really fucking cute#i am SO FUCKING DESPERATE for the original story behind TME's plot to exist you have no fucking idea#and 78 looks promising as to revealing how OG Helene (/Lyla) reacted to OG Fian's death so like#im begging for next week's chapter already i NEED to get a continuation to that death scene#(also calling it now but if Lyla's real name is actually Helene im going to fucking scream)#(for more reasons than one oh my god)
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yzzart · 3 months
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౨ৎ⊹. BOYFRIEND!KENJI HEADCANONS!
── content warnings: F!reader, mention of Emiko, Emi and Mina, Ultraman form, Kenji being a little needy (once again), fluff, a little something to warm our hearts and minds so dreamy.
── word count: 683!
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⭑.ᐟ Underneath, and sometimes over, tight-fitting t-shirts and extremely expensive fabrics, wear a necklace; however, there is something special there. — His promise ring hangs on the gold chain; like a talisman, something that surrounds he with luck and passion. — Staying attached and close to you, even with a small object.
⤷ If he needs to think or try to decide something dramatically important and you're not around, Sato will take his fingers to the necklace and hold the ring; looking for guidance. — Oh, and waking up, before him, and contemplating that shiny and significant piece, which rests on his broad chest, is angelic.
⭑.ᐟ It's not uncommon to feel, in the middle of the night, Kenji's face trying, persistently, on your neck; readily, wanting to harness the huge and strong body between your. — He doesn't care about the grotesque difference in size, just at that moment, and he doesn't give up.
“Kenji, be careful…!” — Your voice, fully, drunk with sleep and maintaining stillness, murmured between the boy's black and shiny locks; who only responded with a snore, more like a purr and clinging even tighter to you.
⭑.ᐟ Sato can't keep his hands off you, no matter what's going on, what you're doing or what simple task you're performing; hands on your waist, kisses on every exposed and revealed part of your body, thin and wide fingers catching on some part of your clothes. — Don't be upset with him, this poor man is in love with you.
⤷ One day, Mina compared him to a sloth and obviously got a frown of disapproval and the adorable Emi observes how her “father” remains so attached to her “mother”. — Even laughing and grunting when he saw a completely sleepy and desperate Ken crawling towards you.
⭑.ᐟ Please, we have, we need to talk about all the times Kenji and Emi train together, most of the time, being just leisure moments, you sit in the stands, virtually, scheduled and cheer for them; accompanied by Mina. — The feeling of nostalgia, remembering an incredible part of his life, is exposed in Ken's chest; remembering his mother.
⭑.ᐟ I can easily imagine Ken pressing his nose against your cheek or neck wanting your attention; also, when he wants to show you the way Emi is sleeping, enjoying the baby's sweetness. — And, together, pressing his forehead against yours during countless moments of the day and night, when you get home after confronting some creature and every time he want to say "i love you" to you.
⭑.ᐟ This man knows you like the back of his hand; no one can disagree or dispute this fact. — Kenji pays attention to your gestures, noticing your body language and, for a matter of seconds, he knows that something is bothering you; and, there he is, dedicating himself, with all his attention, to doing his girl well.
⭑.ᐟ Funny situations, for Ken, between you and his Ultraman form are included in your lives. — Once, while chasing Aboras, he ended up finding you on the street, wanting to go home, and clearly he was distracted by wanting to cause a provocation. — Mina gave the boy a long, and rightly so, scolding.
“Go back to the house, young lady.” — The robotic voice filled a part of the city's environment, wanting to convey an authoritarian image. — “You know…” — He pointed one of his gigantic fingers in your direction, then towards the place he was. — “The streets have been very dangerous lately.” — Oh, you stopped yourself from answering him like you really wanted to.
“Thank you, so much, for the advice, Ultraman.”
⭑.ᐟ There are nights — many, many nights — that Ken spends watching, contemplating you sleeping, peacefully; your face remained full, without signs of tiredness, exquisite and messy locks spread out, this was adored by the player's eyes. — Between seconds of fascination, Kenji longed, dreamed, deeply and painfully, of his mother meeting you; this way, she would have the chance to know the light that raised her dear son.
⤷ Kenji prospers, sometimes praying, that one day his mother will return, safe and sound, and be able to achieve what he wants so much in his life.
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