I finally watched Pasha's performance from 10 years ago and now I hate the whole Loreen situation even more.
Pasha came back and brought something completely new. Different genre, different language, different visuals. Those are two completely separate eurovision entries.
But Loreen? Loreen ran Euphoria through an editing program and called it a day. And she STILL won and Pasha scored worse than last time (which is a whole separate beef for me personally bc Soarele şi Luna fucks)
Fuck the jury fuck the system and fuck next years eurovision. I almost wish everyone would take a note and send the most boring generic pop song they can come up with and for the public to completely ignore all of it. But I feel like ultimately that's what the juries would like best anyway
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Eurovision 2023: #08 & #07
08. MOLDOVA
Pasha Parfeni - "Soarele și luna"
18th place
Decade rank: 28/116
[above Trenuletul, below Gjon's Tears]
"With friend and foe, we march to the battle plain
Some to seek success, others to seek fame
We play with honour, for the love of this game
So that someday, someone, somewhere will remember our name." -- Benjamin "Coach" Wade
No surprises here, I would hope. Pasha may have aged 11 years since his last appearance but he is still the same weird, irreverent stoner king he has always been. Perhaps even moreso than before, now that he's openly become the Eurovision equivalent to Coach in both style and substance.😍
Pasha delivered not more, not less, but exactly what I thought and hoped he would.
First of all, the song is just really fucking good. It sounds (very complimentary) like something you would hear in a Vidbir final. Maybe a follow-up to Kadnay's Beat of the Universe, remember that one? (Melovin's BIGGEST crime is robbing us of Kadnay, Lelya AND the minotaur girl because zomg uwu quirky theatre kid) (lmao the way I totally would have been okay with Dreamer and put it high on my 2024 list, cuz he ate that) (um, hypothetically ofc). Vidbir sound-alike is huge praise for a country that normally takes the role of a Schrödinger's qualifier and it was nice to for once know exactly what we were getting here.
REEEEEYNE N FYAAAAAAAA GAEDE MEHEEHEEEEEE
And here we get to the delivery of the song and, I mean, it's Moldova. How else are they going to tackle a song about pagan wedding ceremonies?
Moldova don't care about your stupid "wokeness". (good grief the (unselfaware) ableists freaking out about the little person. ALLOW PEOPLE MAKE A LIVING THE WAY THEY WISH TO, GOOD GRIEF. Dwarfism is not a cognitive disability, they have full agency to work in the entertainment industry. Stop behaving like they need you to emancipate against "the oppressive straight white cismale".)
Moldova don't care about trifles such as appearing "competent" to your insipid juries.
MOLDOVA IS REAL, always aiming fully maximize their entertainment factor for the lowest possible cost, and thank fuck they do.
Only this country could stage their performer as karate-chopping at a little person and make it light entertainment.
Only this country could take a quirky, Ukraine-coded electrofolk fusion and stage it like a weird grotesquerie,
Only this country could bring irreverence with such unerring earnesty.
"Soarele si luna" was a yet another solid showcase of what Moldova excell at, raw intuitive entertainment with no strings attached. Of course, we're in 2023 and being fun doesn't matter in the overal rankings. The least I can do in those cases is give a high spot to those who've been paid dirt the most.~
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07. LITHUANIA
Monika Linkyte - "Stay"
11th place
Decade ranking: 25/116
[Above Stefania (Last Dance), below Sam Ryder]
HOORAY FOR YET ANOTHER YEAR OF LITHUANIA AT THE TOP OF MY BALTIC SISTER RANKING~
(enjoy it for the moment lithuanian readers, because a certain song about narcotics is threatening to take that crown away in 2024...x)
We have finally reached a point where the placements on my ranking more or less match the scoreboard, praise hallelujah. Of the robbed outsiders only Joker Out remain, and they're here to stay. :dramatic cymbal:
Speaking of both Outsiders and Stay, Lithuania were also kind of an outsider at first. After Monika beat Ruta Mur in PiN, I didn't think they would come close to a top 10 - clearly So Low was The Choice, Right? I honestly I don't know if I can feel that way any more. "Stay" aged really well. Ruta is an icon, but she did not have the Monika's secret weapon. She did not have -
ČIŪTOOO TŪŪŪTOOO
ČIŪTOOO TŪŪŪTOOO
ČIŪTOOO TŪŪŪTOOO
And what is "Stay" if not čūitooooo tūūūtoooo. Like legit, those two words, that's ALL it took. Those two words, that mantra, repeated over and over and over again, is what endeared her to me and juries (this is Lithuania. LITHUANIA. and juries liked them.).
Adding more čiūto tūto such a simple, elegant tweak, but one that Monika masterfully delivered. The hook is as strong as steel, but it is her charisma and her harmonies with the gospel choir which bent it into pure wholesomeness.
"Stay" is not the strongest composition, but it was an effective one. What it did exceptionally well was deliver the home comforts. The song is blanket, a fleece, a cuddle. It's the musical equivalent to eating a hearty meal by a lit fireplace, leaning against the warm body of your beau or belle. It is the spirit of Nature Is Healing in music form. It is a mental health balm covered by a mantle čiūto tūto. Lithuania earned their spot on the left side of the scoreboard and that's about as positive a surprise we're gonna get with these darksided results.
THE RANKING
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I love Eurovision season because I always learn things.
This year, it's Moldovan-Romanian folklore.
Moldova's entry, Soarele și Luna, is heavily influenced by Miorița, a poem/ballad/pillar of Romanian-old Moldavian folklore that goes back to the 1700s in its written form but probably goes back earlier.
Balada Miorița tells the story of three shepherds: a Moldovan, and a Wallachian and a Transylvanian who, jealous of the Moldovan, conspire to kill him.
The Moldovan's prized sheep Miorița (lit. little ewe), warns him - but the shepherd doesn't plan to fight back or escape. (Presumably bc shepherding in the Carpathians traditionally involved transhumance and living outdoors for months so... where's he gonna go?)
Instead, the shepherd asks Miorița to hide his death from the other sheep - and from his family - and to tell them instead that he went into the forest to marry a princess, with the sun, moon, and mountains standing as witnesses:
Soarele şi luna / Mi-au ţinut cununa. [...] Preoţi, munţii mari.
The Sun and Moon came down / to hold my wedding crown [...] The priests were the mountains high
(note: I'm working from some really sketchy translations; very open to better resources pls.)
Anyway, the description of the wedding is not only beautiful, but a fantastic allegory for the shepherd accepting death, laying down with his fate and embracing it instead of showing fear. Reclaiming agency to protect the people he loves (and redefine his own memory) in the face of an existential threat.
Wildly out of my depth at the point I'm reading about the role the story - and particularly the symbolism/iconography of the lone shepherd - played in Romanian independence, but I'm pretty sure it was a thing. Likewise, the choice of this material as a starting point for Moldova's ESC entry is very interesting to me.
Moldova's 2022 offering, Trenuleţul, used a train as an allegory for a pro-unification message (for.. obvious geopolitical reasons, in addition to the strong pan-Balkan cultural ones detailed in the song):
Pleacă trenul! Unde eşti?
Chişinău – București.
The train's route is East to West
Chisinau to Bucharest!
Idk if I'm now overthinking it too much (I got excited and I thought it was neat, okay?) but I just feel like the cultural overlap, the defiance and the energy of Pasha Parfeni's performance carries more symbolism than the entry is getting credit for. Unsurprising, given this is also the year of Croatian art rock political commentary via drag generalissimos and tractor-based analogies, but still.
Either way, I learned something new and found a new thing to read, and I thought it was beautiful. And that made me want to share. So... enjoy?
Iar tu de omor
Să nu le spui lor.
Să le spui curat
Că m-am însurat
Cu-o mândră crăiasă,
A lumii mireasă;
Că la nunta mea
A căzut o stea;
Soarele şi luna
Mi-au ţinut cununa.
Brazi şi paltinaşi
I-am avut nuntaşi,
Preoţi, munţii mari,
Of how I met my death,
Tell them not a breath;
Say I could not tarry,
I have gone to marry
A princess – my bride
Is the whole world’s pride.
At my wedding, tell
How a bright star fell,
Sun and moon came down
To hold my bridal crown,
Firs and maple trees
Were my guests; my priests
Were the mountains high;
(x) (x)
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