#some of these also apply irl obviously. like gender essentialism

[degenderates]

What would almost-terf talking points look like? Genuinely curious because I never see stuff like that, though I may just not be aware of it. Thank you in advance ❤️

hey! no worries, it takes a lot of being on the internet (unfortunately lol) to notice the patterns of how online terfs talk about gender and make their stuff palatable for the masses, so here are a few pointers. keep in mind that people who post this kind of rhetoric aren't always terfs and you should be skeptical of ANYBODY who tells you that there are a complete set of "rules" you must follow or subjects you must avoid. think for yourself, but also be careful. with that being said, here are some things i've noticed after being on the trans internet for a few years:

1- "radfem"/"radfem-safe"/"radblr"/etc. usually they're a terf they just dont want to add the te- to the acronym. funny thing is they're not all that radical lol.

2- gender essentialism. this is one of the most insidious i think, because it's so well disguised, or simply poised as common sense. this can include anything about men and women being inherently different, whether this is about sexual violence, sexuality in general (including types of queerness), love, understanding/intuition/empathy, certain skills, whatever. sometimes it's just a joke but be careful because humor is a form of persuasion as well, just easily able to avoid blame. the reason why gender essentialism is terfy is because it posits that gender is immutable. ie. can't change. women are inherently like this, so someone who identifies as a man now will never get it, even if they end up being trans later. though some of these takes might have an addendum of, "trans women are women" or something like that, supposedly being inclusive of trans ppl, they don't account for people who aren't secretly eggs their whole lives. sure, a transfem who always knew she was a girl might be "included," but not a trans person who lived as their agab for their first 20, 30, or even 40 years. etc. tldr: this kind of rhetoric reveals how people truly feel about gender difference regardless of what they claim to support.

3- "male/female socialization." this one's tricky because yes we as humans in a society are socialized and yes that includes gender (which is a social construct in and of itself), but the vast majority of times i've seen this phrasing used is by terfs, so much so that if trans people want to talk about gender socialization, we have to use other terminology. the problem here is that folks' "current" gender is considered null and void due to how they were raised. this one is sort of the opposite of the phenomenon of "including" trans people in gender essentialism--it blocks us out from our actual gender in favor of seeing us as what we once were.

4- a weird fascination with militant genetalia. urls or bios that include stuff about vaginas and cunts killing people or whatever...i'm not against this, but most people who have this on their blog are terfs lol. aside from the jokes, people who see phallic imagery as something inherently violent or the penis as a body part as violent instead of like, the person as violent (if they are) is a big one. i guess the militant vagina is like reclaiming this somehow. i'm not sure. but it's a thing.

5- gatekeeping queerness. people who try to limit queerness to being lesbian/gay/bisexual, acephobes, arophobes, people who have this very basic understanding of queerness as same-sex attraction. sometimes they hate the word "queer." people who don't understand queerness as a culture and a way to play with gender and identity and presentation as well as sexuality, or as a political entity. queerness isn't just about being gay or straight. now not all acephobes are terfs, but because terfs have admitted to using acephobia to induct people into being radfems, and most terfs are acephobic....well. that's just one example, of course, but the point stands. anyone attempting to divide the queer community is inherently sus to me.

and finally, 6- if you download shinigami eyes, people marked as terfs show up in red. be careful because sometimes people mark others as red out of malintent, but if the person is showing other signs of being a terf and is red, they probably are one, lol. hope this helps, and other people feel free to add on! as always, take my post as just the observations of one individual, as a grain of salt!

[dykefever]

wolfstar tumblr has started again to claim that we shouldn’t describe sirius as short and feminine because it’s “heteronormative”, that we shouldn’t describe remus as tall and masculine because it’s, you know, un-canon (a terf’s?). it feels like terfs are coming to the fandom and we are going back to the time back then when popular writers who turned out terfs were dominating the fandom. seems the fandom is adopting the old terfs’ claims again and even shamelessly applauding it. how are you bearing these days, laura. as for me as a trans person who hates jkr and her holy “canon”, it’s horrible. feel like everything the few good people (such as you) in the fandom had tried was vain. sorry for disturbing you.

well it's been about three or so months since i last made a post about this stuff so sounds about right that more terfy posts are coming out all surrounding height discourse. it's a cycle in the r/s fandom and im afraid these terfs and transphobes aren't coming to the fandom they've all probably been here a while because this fandom is rife with them due to the source material and general politics of the people that write the fic (liberals who are so totally for gender neutral bathrooms but transwomen make them obviously uncomfortable irl)

i've already talked a bit about how harmful and also dumb this line of thinking is re: short and fem s so i'll link this post on gender essentialism i made but i'll say again it's just so tedious how it's often the same people who don't seem to inspect where their assumptions are coming from. people stick terfs dni in their bio and perhaps disagree with the openly transphobic lawmakers but that doesn't mean their biases against trans people don't exist. transphobia is far more insidious than that!

like people seem to go: short s -> s is "whiny" and "annoying" -> he's feminine (whether he actually is or not) -> thus he's being written like he's a girl and that's bad because that's heteronormative

the media heuristic that exists that "whiny" and "weaker" men (ie. complaining, relying on their boyfriend/partner for things, idk being the fucking little spoon) are women-coded does not mean you shouldn't make any character whiny or annoying or whatever because then you are essentially making them a woman and that's Bad -- the response is to unpack the very idea that there are certain traits connected to men and women and when applied to people of the opposite or other genders somehow still has a connection to an innate gender of 'man' or 'woman'.

also, s characterisation is varied but not as prolifically dramatic and bad as people seem to say. they're latching on to the 'feminine short s characterisation' where he acts dramatic as if i have not ready many a fic where he is tall and stereotypical masculine with similar personality traits. however, these traits are viewed differently when packaged differently. the difference is s wearing a skirt or being perceived as feminine in a way that they do not view as aligned with their perception of how gender should operate.

whether intentionally transphobic or not, the shorthand people use in these discussion always ties in with this belief that there are innate gendered characterisitics that if acted out in certain relationships makes them heteronormative. i am afraid that's not how queer relationships work! they are still gay even if one of them is short and the other tall and one is fem and the other masc like? you can dislike certain relationship dynamics but that doesn't make them inherently problematic or homophobic or anything. i avoid plenty of r/s fic because it's not how i personally view them. i don't try and morally justify my dislike because i don't like how they wrote r i just click out. as for saying one thing is canon and another is not like idgaf whatever!! most of canon is quite horrible and problematic and of course we are all engaging with it to some degree but to use it to argue something as meaningless as height should be adhered to. well i'm scrolling away frankly.

idk people are always telling on themselves in these discussions and you can pretty much always track one degree of separation between them and a pretty outward terf. i block and unfollow a lot of people but at the end of the day i engage with far less content than i used to because it sucks seeing so much transphobic and often anti-queer discussion. it's exhausting and it's why so many trans people especially transfem people leave this fandom. people can slap anti-jkr in their bio as much as they want, a terf is still a fucking terf.

[goblin-gardens]

PLEASE yell about tama bull, i have been thinking about qunari gender so much lately and i’d love to hear your Thots

yessss a single piece of encouragement

So, basically, my take on Qunari gender is that it gets a lot more interesting if you don’t apply real-world western gender structure (”human” in Thedas) to it at all. The implication is that in Qunari society, kids grow up without gender until they reach an age when they can start training for a role. It’s the roles themselves that are gendered, although not necessarily along the lines that match up with western irl gender roles. Basically, look at the “gender roles” section in the Qunari entry on the DA wiki and turn it all the fucking way inside out. Then throw it in the trash. Then light the trash on fire.

I’m torn between two scenarios: 1) that there are three primary “genders” of role: Military, Craftsmen, and Priesthood, to match the three members of the Triumvirate (Arishok, Arigena, and Ariqun, in order) and that the application of western gender structure (esp. he and she pronouns) is a necessary but slightly misleading effect of translating this structure into “Trade” (English or other player languages).

or 2) that the structure is more that each role essentially is its own gender, since it comes with expectations of behavior and responsibilities that are distinct from any others.

I’d think that Aqun-athlock individuals would be more common than straight-up irl transgender people, especially in the second scenario, since people change over the course of their lives, and even the most exact aptitude test given when you’re 11 or whatever will not hold true for your whole entire life. So I imagine that “gender” (role) fluidity or change over time is actually pretty common under the Qun.

So as for the Iron Bull himself, obviously he is cis-coded in the game. But is that an expression of the actual expectations of his role under the Qun? If roles are individual genders, I think he can do basically whatever he wants and still have it be “right”, however he also makes it clear that he is playing into stereotypes (mostly racial, but some gendered) in order to project the right front for his job.

His job, which is not actually warrior, but spy/informant. One question here is, would this role fit under the general heading of “military” and thus match the translation of “male” that he projects (and that we expect based on Sten and the DA2 Qunari) or would it fit more under “priesthood” and actually be “correctly” translated as “female”, and if so, why would he not use that translation? Well, probably for Spy Reasons. Either way, doesn’t he actually seem quite comfortable in the Southern/Human role of “man”? Perhaps he is coming to identify with it more strongly than his originally-assigned gender of “spy”? Perhaps he is just as much a trans man as Krem?

And then, Tama!Bull. There’s a few ways I like to play with this: one, an AU where instead of joining the Ben-Hassrath (or the Beresaad and then the Ben-Hassrath) he was trained as a Tamassran and stayed in that role (there’s an AMAZING fic out there on Ao3 with this premise. I’ll link it in a reblog when I track it down) or a semi-AU where he was trained as a Tamassran before going to Seheron. Basically, I headcanon that he’s great with kids, a good teacher, a good therapist, good at the things that Tamassrans are good at.

And then taking a step to the left of that, a related headcanon, which is really just that Bull is afab. The whole game/fic/headcanon/theory is exactly the same, but Bull is (what irl western/non-Qunari cultures would call) afab. I just think that’s neat.

[enbypanposi]

What does my DNI mean?

Ive gotten a lot of asks to this nature, so I just want to clear up some information. This is not an invitation for discourse! Fuck off! Firstly, here’s my banner:

Exclusionist:

Those who think asexuals and aromantics are not a part of the LGBTQ community. They are. There are plenty of resources with this and every IRL big LGBT organization recognizes aces and aros. This is discourse that really only exists online. I have also seen exclusionist referring to those who think pan people are not LGBT either, which I obviously don’t want here.

Endo & supporters:

Endogenic systems. This refers to a few things, including tulpamancy. Here’s my own explanation, with links to good posts made by systems about it.

Truscum/Transmed

Those who believe you need dysphoria to be trans. Incorrect! Look it up. Further explanation here.

TWERF/SWERF:

Trans Women Exclusionary Radical Feminists and Sex Worker Exclusionary Radical Feminists. Feminism is for all women, including trans women and sex workers. Radfems are not welcome here, as are any transmisogynists and transphobes. TWERF and TERF are synonyms. Explanation here.

Panphobe:

Pretty much what it says on the tin. I’m pan. This is a blog for pan people. If you don’t like pan people, think we’re not LGBT, think we’re inherently transphobic or are just bi, go away.

Gender Critical:

This has a few definitions? Either those who think 1) all trans people and transness probably isnt real or 2) all nonbinary people are nonbinaryness probably isnt real. Essentially ‘critical’ of those who identify outside of their AGAB. You’re not tolerant, youre transphobic and exorsexist.

NSFW/kink:

I’m a minor as I’m writing this, so. Yeah. This goes for any kink or NSFW blog, doesn’t matter what it is or who runs it. Interact through a SFW blog. I’d like to say that this does not apply to people who occasionally enjoy or post or reblog explicit content! It’s only if the blog is exclusively dedicated to NSFW that it’s a problem. Please don’t stress if every once in a while you post a raunchy fanfic or anything like that, you’re good and that’s absolutely not what this category is about.

NOMAP/MAP

Non-Offending Minor Attracted Person. This is a codeword for pedophile. I don’t care if you’ve never touched a kid, I am one, so go away. I don’t care if you’re in therapy, I won’t care when I’m older. Just NO. 

Anti-MOGAI:

MOGAI being Marginalized Orientations Gender identities And Intersex. And alternative term for LGBT. All those ‘weird’ genders and sexualities youve been hearing about. There are a few which are BS (circumgender comes to mind) and few which can be harmful (dissasociatsexual) but for the most part they are HARMLESS and FUN. Its just against trans and gay people having harmless fun. Have all the harmless fun you want here!

Anti-Anti:

Also known as pro-shipping. Listen, if you disagree with antis in how they approach telling people to stop, thats fine, but they are, for the most part, very young teens trying to stop the spread of incestuous, nonconsentual, and generally fucked up pornographic media. If you support that media I cannot support you being here. 

Thats about it! Additionally, I would request that those who dont support self-diagnosis don’t follow. Thanks for reading!

[dkettchen]

BLACK MIRROR S5E1 “STRIKING VIPERS” E X P L A I N E D

-with the help of gender and game theory-

Y’all asked for it so here we go

Some things before we start: -If you were watching the episode looking for gay/trans shit, and got disappointed, I’m sorry but I can’t help you because that’s just not what the episode was about and that is ok. It explored some aspects of queer experience, and the limbo between queer and cis-straight experience, that isn’t usually addressed in such an honest and indepth way, which I think is just as important as trans or gay rep.  -I will focus my analysis on the core theme of what certain academics writing about androgyny call the “moment of transgression” so in this case the question of ‘what is Karl/Roxette’s deal & what does that mean for Danny/Lance’s feelings toward and interactions with them?’. -CW: transphobia, homophobia, toxic masculinity, (rpg) uncanny valley stuff, you get it, you know what subjects we’ll be talking about here. 

Now!

I’d like to start by pointing out the title “Striking Vipers” to get the phallus talk out of the way right off the bat x’D: It’s a very blatant penis metaphor, and Vipers specifically are venomous, so represent toxic masculinity. The image of them striking signals danger. The repetition of phallic symbols represents the threat of castration (see medusa turning them bois to stone & the heroic masculinity of the mirror shielded boi who managed to defeat her), which to phallocentric masculinity is the scawiest thing there is (losing the phallus = losing manhood = death?? I guess??). Striking Vipers means that toxic masculinity, by nature, is a threat to itself. (I could talk for hours about the exact warped logic of phallocentricity but Imma spare y’all cause I don’t think it’s relevant for this, I’d even go as far as saying this episode was anti-phallic (which I use here as a more inclusive word for “feminist”, as the episode’s core is about two guys, but still focused on them experiencing and embracing feminine power and freeing themselves from phallocentricity(/patriarchy)’s grasp, just like “what men want” was preoccupied with the toxic masculinity of its female protagonist)) That sets up the kind of horror the episode will be about, the male fear of castration, of loss of identity, of having to face the fact that traditional masculinity is toxic even to the people who conform to it. 10/10 title choice.

Next up: the core question of what label to put on Karl and Danny’s VR interactions (‘Fellas, is it gay to fuck ur best friend in a lady body in VR?’). Which leads to the first question which is: what gender is Karl when he’s playing as Roxette?  An essentialist might say: ‘Well he’s a man irl so he’s still a man even if he plays with a female avatar. Danny’s attraction to him is either him being trapped or just plain old gay.’ But I don’t think that’s the case. It’s not a trap scenario (have some videos on traps and how they’re not real actually: (x.), (x.)), because both people involved know the exact parameters of the situation. Danny knows this is Karl in Roxette’s body, there’s nothing hidden, no misunderstanding to be had here. I also don’t think it’s gay because if it was this would’ve happened irl or with two male avatars, but it only happened once one of them was in a female avatar, that was the change that made it happen. It’s not a fetishising phallic/trans women scenario either, because it’s the opposite, it’s a man’s mind in a woman’s body. There’s no doubt about Karl being a man irl, a queer man sure, but definetely a man. He’s just too into -womanhood while playing her for me to say he’s still male when he’s in that form, like Karl as Roxette isn’t a trans guy as a man’s mind in a female body usually would be (like f.e. Ranma 1/2), I also don’t think Karl as Roxette is an androgyne/non-binary/third term either, because again, he’s embracing her womanhood and the role that comes with it, to the extreme that is hetero PiV sex, too much. I’d argue what we see is the closest to the liberation and euphoria described by other queer men when doing drag, she’s just a more extreme version of drag, of crossplaying, making the fantasy real, wearing not only the clothes of a woman but the body too. Roxette as Karl’s avatar is an alter ego, who is female, so -on the risk of sounding like the biggest performativist since Judith Butler- Karl as Roxette presents as female, so, for all intents and purposes, is female in that moment, regardless of his irl persona maintaining his male gender outside of that. 

But that wasn’t what we wanted to know, was it. Because even if, in the moment that Karl plays Roxette, we can say that person is female, that doesn’t eliminate the fact that Karl, outside of that, isn’t and that he’s still the one playing her. It’s the notion of how the player/actor/performer and avatar/character/persona aren’t the same thing and can have different relationships with someone in real life vs in the game, and how that can be confusing to think about because there is no clear line between the two, something that is called “bleed” in ludology(/game studies, from lat. ludus: game or school; referring to the gladiator schools in like the colosseum), despite their relationships being fundamentally different (in this case friendship irl vs passionate love in game).  Take TAZ as an example: The McElroys are related, but in playing a trpg, the DM, usually Griffin, takes up the mantle of all NPCs in the game world, including love interests. Griffin played Julia, Kravitz, and Danny (different Danny lol), but he’s talking to his brother, except he isn’t, is he, cause it’s not Griffin talking and it’s not his brother responding, it’s two characters interacting. A similar uncanny valley can be found in actor/character bleed: Take Ludi and Pom (the actors for Lance and Roxette) in this one: like 80% of their screentime was spent making out or having fake sex. These actors aren’t dating (as far as I’m aware lol), this is their job, to fake love each other on screen, imagine having to do that with a coworker you feel nothing for. It’s the characters that feel something and you have to play that feeling (which is so meta at that point, they’re playing characters that are avatars being played by characters in the show). Also, talking of role-playing, can we appreciate the scene of Danny & Theo at the bar where they’re role-playing and she’s like that was hot and he’s like mental note bae’s into role-playing, because DAMN that foreshadowing of the erotic potential of roleplay as a concept.

But it’s not role-playing really either with Danny and Karl, is it? They’re playing in avatars other than themselves but they’re not fully a different person. They still very much feel the same just in a different form. Their emotions are real even though they might only apply to part of their experience, the in-game part. Yet they obviously take them seriously and personal and get influenced by them outside the game. Maybe the question is what is and is not role-playing? Where does the bleed start and end, and do we even need to know the answer to those questions? They answer those questions for themselves in the end by testing out their feelings irl to see if they track or not, fully ready for both possibilities (which 10/10 character development love it). They want clarity. It’s about the emotional limbo fantasy brings with it. It’s the same question “Are traps gay” is about. (Not the “Is it ok to feel attracted to androgynous ppl” one necessarily, but) “Does feeling attracted to the fantasy mean you feel attracted to the “real” thing underneath?” Are the feelings for the fantasy alone or also for the reality? Are they only applicable to the latter and does that change something about what you thought you knew about yourself? It’s a question about the fringe edges of limited/monosexuality and the very fabric of reality. 

Let’s return to Karl to look at his experience as Roxette. We’ve established that she is female, but what is Karl while playing her? In the spirit of queer drag as liberating, it’s almost like he’s taking a break from being Karl when playing as her. Drag, crossplay, or this extreme version of it, functions as a break from the toxicity and limitations of traditional gender roles (so in this case traditional masculinity). It is freeing, though what does it free? Some genderless spirit inhabiting each person? But then how do you explain the firm gender identity lots of people, including for all we know Karl, experience in everyday life? As a trans person I know that there is SOMETHING to gender on some level that can create gender dysphoria (social and/or physical) for people when put in a body they don’t identify with. As a drag performer, trpg enthousiast, and notorious crossplayer, I know that taking a break from that reality and being somebody else can be relieving, a break from your own problems. So what is that part of us that translates into fantasy? I feel like this goes into transhumanist territory which I don’t know enough about to even attempt to provide an answer. I think what it comes down to in terms of gender theory is, this is a situation at the height of where performativism is true and relevant. There is a relativity to the nature of reality and gender itself. Whatever base essence there is that causes gender dysphoria at a mismatch between outside and inside, doesn’t apply here. Both notions (of essential and performative gender) are real and have an impact on people but neither is always the case and neither is never the case. They’re not mutually exclusive. 

So, seeing as it seems impossible to pinpoint what gender Karl/Roxette qualifies as (other than all and/or none), let’s look at the nature of Danny/Lance and Karl/Roxette’s interactions and feelings toward those interactions and each other to try and contextualise what label(s) they might fit under.  The desire on Danny’s side when faced with Roxette’s form shows itself in a way he’d never feel toward Karl. That visual change, and the social changes it brings with it (in gender role), makes it so extreme, because it pairs the parts of his friend he appreciates and enjoys (personality and whatever deeper connection a close friendship brings with it), with a form that is attractive to him. That change translates to Karl too. In playing with this new form that has a different role and a different effect on someone he’s known for so long, he flows into that, melts into this new persona and lives it up! The way they interact in game isn’t gay. It is very much reflecting how straight attraction and female sexuality works. On one hand it’s based in undeniable difference (hetero = different), and on the other hand Karl/Roxette’s enjoyment thereof is based in being desirable, in having that power of seduction just by existing, that notion of feminine power and the freedom that comes with it. It’s not autogynephilia, that would imply he gets off on the idea of himself as a woman, which is not the case, he gets off on being desired as a woman, which is what female sexuality is about (source: ContraPoints’ Autogynephilia video (which I recommend, it’s very good))

Still whenever Karl tries to get Danny to keep having VR sex with him/Roxette, he talks about her in 3rd person, like a persona. In saying “it’s just like porn” he poses something that is very much a different activity (acting out the porn by -doin’ it-) as a homosocially (social as opposed to sexual/romantic) acceptable one (watching porn together which I’ve been told is a thing). He attempts to differentiate himself from his female persona and enjoyment there-of (by objectifying her, like a porn actress to be watched rather than identified with), himself and Danny from the queerness (in enjoying femininity and in Danny being down with basically fucking a drag-queen) and to retreat back into heteronormative traditional masculinity, away from the scawy unknown of exploring your sexuality. His internalised homo- and transphobia makes him suppose that Danny, as a supposed straight guy, will only respond to the safety of assured non-queerness, which, honestly, I don’t think is the case with him. Karl supposes his cancelling on him and not wanting to do it anymore is out of the fear for his sexual identity or whatever, but from what I can tell, while Danny also seems to be rather confused about what it all means, the reasons he cancels their nightly sessions, and rejects Karl/Roxette, are always about not wanting his marriage to fall apart. He quite clearly prefers hot VR sex to hanging out with his wife, and cancels out of duty to her rather than fear. Even the first time they kiss, Karl is the one to freak out first. Danny seems much calmer about the attraction part of the situation, to the point of in the end being the one to take initiative and make them try it out irl to put an end to the confusion.

The episode hits hard because it takes the way men play video games and brings it to its logical conclusion. Video games are mens safe-space, and they do play with that playful flirty banter. The show takes that and makes it real, including taking it to its extreme conclusion that is -doin’ it-. It infiltrates the male safe space by taking normalised behaviour, and taking it so far that it puts traditional masculinity and heteronormative attraction in question, the very thing the safe space was supposed to protect them from. That’s why it’s existentially horrifying for the main characters (and viewers that identify with them) and qualifies as a black mirror episode even without having a homo-/trans-/biphobic ending (like other media that put traditional masculinity in question usually do, not to mention all the horror based in queer-coding) 

Hope y’all enjoyed this journey into a bit of mind-bending game and gender theory! Pls don’t expect me to do this like ever again bc I need to go work on my actual essay rip x’D 

[zorilleerrant]

2017

January

an amorphous thing A poem about misogyny, in all its forms. I never quite got the ending to do what I wanted, but overall I think it’s strong.

Fandom: Cho Chang bio I don’t know if you want to call this a ficlet or what? I think I’m going to expand it or something. Just a musing on why she’s called Cho Chang.

poem This is sort of a poem and sort of a joke because fuck the environment I guess; it was topical at the time I think.

musing on seasonal affective disorder An addition to something I really liked that someone else wrote, because I was having feelings about SAD. The initial story is wlw; my addition is nblw even though I was trying to match the tone and style of the original.

there is a demon A poem about femininity, bisexuality, and mental illness. Our narrator is, I think, a makeup youtuber? Or something like that. This was written in response to people saying just awful things about makeup hobbyists.

HP fic: Courage Hermione deals with racism. I always headcanoned Hermione as middle eastern, so I wanted to add something with that because I don’t see it a lot even when people intentionally make her nonwhite.

American Gods/Sookie Stackhouse fic: Small Town Mentality A little character study about Shadow interacting with Sookie. This was when I was rereading American Gods, and I was like. You know, these books have similar vibes and similar canons. Timeline wise it’s set about halfway through American Gods and a few years before the first Sookie book. (The title is about not-my-business isolationism, not racial violence.)

The Maze Runner book review Musing on the worldbuilding problems in the book and how writers can and should do better than that.

February

Shadowhunters fic: Parabatai A lot of people were invested in the part where Jace could tell that Alec boned. Just my take on the thing. There’s sex in this one. Probably my most popular fic to date.

March

untitled Beauty and the Beast fic From the perspective of LeFou waxing poetic about Gaston.

Shadowhunters fic: Love Will Tear Us Apart Magnus blames himself about Raphael drinking Izzy’s blood. So tbh I don’t actually remember this fic and I don’t think anyone liked it? I will have to read it over at some point and see what it is.

Shadowhunters fic: A Fish Without a Bicycle This is a companion piece to Parabatai; going along with the Parabatai bond being a sort of metaphor for an erotic relationship, it posits Izzy as aspec and explores that a little.

Shadowhunters fic: Answers Another companion piece. Just a lot about Alec exploring his sexuality and trying to figure stuff out.

Shadowhunters fic: Forever Home Magnus being A Dad, to cats and other magical creatures.

April

queer is not a slur Just a poem bitching at people about the ‘omg q slur’ nonsense.

untitled six word story look it’s only six words either read it or don’t. (it’s not very good.)

the two genders A poem about how stupid gender essentialism is, and how people apply it to literal newborn babies.

untitled poem ???

May

Static Shock fic: No Flams Prepz Hotstreak talks to a (presumably court mandated) therapist.

Static Shock fic: Worry Static’s dad worries about the kids in his life.

Static Shock fic: Everybody Makes Mistakes Character study on Virgil, pilot centric. (Contains guns.)

mall gothic Yes, that’s a pun. No, I don’t know what the point of this was either.

let me tell you something about not being confident in your writing A poem about writing and your feelings about what you’ve written. It’s supposed to be inspirational probably.

ROY G. BIV A poem about what does and does not exist. Implicitly about LGBT+ gatekeeping but there’s nothing direct in it. I like this one a lot.

June

flag a poem on why I didn’t like the Philly pride flag back when everyone was gushing about how pure and perfect it was.

pride a poem that I think was mostly bitching about people being like ‘don’t do xyz you’re ruining pride!’ or like gatekeeping or whatever. not sure if it stands up without context

Ocean Short story about a nonbinary mage questing after a fantasy sword. Written on the assumption this is a typical high fantasy universe so no there are no proper safety protocols or historical preservation procedures. Mildly comedic.

poetry isn’t real just a micropoem about poetry, the most common topic for poetry

I have a poem about gatekeeping. someone probably told me I wasn’t allowed to use the word queer (again) or like accused me of not understanding queer history? I don’t know it happens. this poem is probably triggering if you’ve got issues with violence generally or queerphobic violence in specific

queer is another poem about gatekeeping. prose poem. I don’t know man people keep going on about bullshit

Static Shock fanfic: Protest Static meets Magneto. The timeline on this is obviously confusing af, but like, imagine it’s during the corresponding irl point of any of the major ups of BLM protests, within Static’s timeline somewhere after he’s got the hang of heroing but before he’s really used to it, and in Magneto’s timeline, somewhere during the initial rise of the Brotherhood. This was just an idea that got stuck in my head and that’s about it.

Static Shock fanfic: Attraction Virgil/Richie. Just an excuse to write puns.

Static Shock fanfic: Marathon Static & Rubberband Man. Fluff

Static Shock fanfic: Frieda Character study. Also ruminating on bullying and sexual harassment. (It’s about the gun violence episode, if that gets to you.)

Static Shock fanfic: Educational Overnight Crossover with Batman. Mostly animated Batman continuity (although largely backfilled from Batman Beyond), but I don’t think it super matters to the text of the thing. Static pretends to be Batman and has to face off against the Riddler. Also featuring Richie in hot pants (as Robin).

July

okay. so. musing about writer’s block, self-esteem/mental illness, and the thought processes that go into writing. maybe a prose poem? I don’t know what you would call this particular form

growing up depression poetry

August

a few points bullet list formatted poem about writing and writing advice

Welcome to Fae Mart humorous story about retail in Faerie

September

Let’s Talk About Slurs it’s a poem about people who smugly claim they’d never say a slur

on good and evil a prose poem or something. about how bigotry is learned (and, sort of, unlearned) and why attitudes about it make no sense

Queer as Folk fanfic: Not Always in the Same Way Hunter being bi

November

just the same prose poem about intersectionality and bigotry and how people always conflate everything into neat little soundbites. there’s a bit about reylo at the end there, too, because I kept seeing shit about it at the time, so watch out if that’s a thing for you

December

tw villanelle yeah I only write villanelles what about it? anyway this one has a bunch of violent rhetoric and bad opinions; it’s from the perspective of antis. it’s not very good but the rhymes sound nice

[thelegendofclarke]

I'm sick of people saying Sansa isn't "Stark enough" Also tired of seeing how headcanoning Sansa (just in my mind/art) as Queen is criminal. My intention isnt to erase other characters. I personally don't care if she is QitN in canon. I'll just be glad if GRRM gives her a decent ending. But only imagining Sansa as Queen surely cant be a crime. Sansa has given me a lot of hope irl; helped me deal w/ depression so wanting her success,happiness rulership even it's cathartic

Hi! QitN Sansa anon here. I just wanted to rectify that the word I wanted to use instead of cathartic was therapeutic. I think they both mean same but I’m not sure. Sorry. English is not my native language and I struggle w/ it. Thanks for understanding.

Hello Anonny!

First of all, please don’t apologize for your English, it is seriously EXCELLENT! It’s probably better than mine tbqh. Secondly, I AM SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME SO LONG TO ANSWER! I have no excuse, I am The Worst. 

Getting to the down and dirty of your ask… My dear Anonny, I totally hear you; and if it makes you feel any better, you definitely aren’t alone! Your frustration is honestly one of my main ~grievances~ with fandom and why I honestly having a really hard time engaging with like 85% of the ~meta side~ of fandom. I am in some fandoms, GoT/ASoIaF included, that have some incredibly smart and talented meta writers who are so passionate and hardworking and insightful. The things that they come up with sometimes completely blow me away! It can be easy to fall down the meta rabbit hole and get caught up, especially when people are seeing all these interesting things and coming up with all these amazing and intriguing theories that you NEVER would have thought of. But on the flip side, it can be really frustrating when the meta you are reading just doesn’t resonate with you at all. I mean don’t get me wrong, I am Here for meta as a concept and I usually really love seeing what people come up with. My issue is often in the execution. Sometimes it feels like meta crosses that ~fine line~ between showing you one way to think vs. telling you how to think. 

I definitely see the value in discussing different interpretations of stories and characters, and I even enjoy reading most of them. But too often I feel like people forget that meta is still just an interpretation, it’s as though there has become this ~thing~ where calling something meta automatically makes it infallible. But it’s really important to remember that with meta in regards to literature, while it’s generally meant to be an academic and unbiased approach generally, is still just one person’s interpretation of the facts as they see them. Meta has somehow become this competition about Who Is Right and Being the Rightest, and it just completely disregards how inherently subjective and personal fandom is. I will always and forever maintain that is absolutely impossible to be completely objective in fandom; your opinions, your biases, your Faves, are always going to affect your interpretations and and resulting opinions, that’s just human nature. I don’t get this whole demand for objectivity thing; if people were truly objective about fandom, I don’t think we would even be having this discussion, because no one would be discussing much of anything. Yeah, its important to maintain some level of objectivity, especially when you are having discussions with other people about fandom, but tbh being ~completely objective~ all the time sounds pretty boring. Honestly, I feel like most of the time people who claim they are being “totally objective” when they talk about things like character arcs, possible end games, ect. are even less trust worthy than those people who are up front about their favoritism; imo it usually means they are either totally unaware of their own biases, or that they refuse to acknowledge them.  

I also feel you on the whole thing of “headcanoning Sansa as QitN is erasing other characters,” it’s frustrating to me as well. Because you’re right, wanting Sansa to be in a leadership role does not automatically mean you are disregarding other characters. Positions like Q/KitN or Lord/Lady of Winterfell are exclusive positions by nature, there are always going to be unequal power dynamics based on that alone. It’s also like you were saying, seeing Sansa in a position of power and leadership role can definitely be cathartic and therapeutic (I think both words work btw!). As a character who has essentially been completely robbed of her agency and self determination and has been at the mercy of others for almost the entire series, it would be extremely satisfying to not only see her regain some of her autonomy, but also be in a position where she could control her own fate. It would also be really satisfying to see a character like Sansa who has had to rely so much on her more feminine, intellectual “soft power” to be in a position where she is clearly powerful in a more traditional, tangible sense. Does she have to be QitN for these things to happen? No, obviously not. But then it also stands to reason that none of the other Stark siblings HAVE to be in that power position to be important either, the same basic logic applies. To say that Sansa fans are “sidelining” or “disregarding” or “erasing” other characters by theorizing or headcanoning that Sansa could be QitN or Lady of Winterfell then means that fans of ANY OTHER CHARACTER who headcanon or theorize about that character holding a position of power in the North are therefore intrinsically sidelining/disregarding/erasing Sansa based on their own argument. Honestly, debating like that sounds tedious and counterproductive and more than a little annoying. Because honestly, it could go on FOREVER, we could be here for the rest of our gd natural born LIVES arguing about this. People are always going to disagree with you, that’s just life. And they are free to do so, just as you are free to disagree with them. But there is a notable difference between disagreement and downright derision; one is totally fine and can be done respectfully, and the other is kind of a dick move. 

And also, like I was talking about earlier, our faves are our faves. In fandom, you are allowed to concentrate on YOUR FAVE and their significance and where you see their story going. That is totally and completely 100% legit! Characters like Sansa are very easy to connect to and care about, especially for people who see themselves and their own struggles in her story. And I think the same goes for Arya… They are these two young characters who experience similar trauma and abuse and honestly just horrendous things that no child should ever have to experience, and they deal with it in such vastly different narrative ways. Arya takes action and lashes out and lets herself be sad and angry. Sansa rationalizes and compartmentalizes lies to herself and everyone around her in order to get through the day. Sansa is pretty much a poster child for traditional femininity, while Arya’s character has so much focus on defying gender roles (or disregarding gender completely in the case of the faceless men). Both have their moments of weakness and strength, both have their aptitudes and their flaws. Relating to and connecting with either on a personal level, as is common with fictional characters, is completely possible and understandable. That’s one of the most beautiful things about the Stark Sisters imo, together and separately they appeal to such a wide array of readers. 

There is no “wrong way” to fandom, there are no “wrong reasons” to love certain characters or story lines, there is NOTHING wrong with Sansa Stark being your favorite character and caring about what happens to her. And also, probably an ~unpopular opinion~ (but idgaf tbh), there is nothing wrong with caring about Sansa (or any of your faves) more than you care about other characters! It’s natural, you are not doing anything wrong, and your interpretations and opinions are no less valid than anyone else’s. That’s the great thing about fiction, it is literally impossible to have a “wrong” interpretation of a fictional work. You don’t even have to agree with the author to be ~right~ about a work of fiction because according to “death of the author” an author’s intentions and biographical facts should hold no weight in regards to an interpretation of their writing; a writer’s interpretation of his own work is no more or less valid than the interpretations of any given reader. Debate is fine, discussion is cool, dialogue about differences of opinions and interpretation can honestly be awesome. What’s not awesome though, is when people think that their interpretation is not only and absolutely correct one, but the sole correct one. That seems, like, wildly narrow minded and more than a little bit cocky tbh. Fandom isn’t a dictatorship; no one’s interpretations are law that can be enforced, no one’s preferences are superior, no one’s faves are automatically more important, and no one is The Great Supreme Rightest (or whatever a fandom dictator’s title would be idek). 

So the point is Anonny, YOU. ARE. VALID. Fandom is all about connecting with a story and it’s characters because they make you feel things. Something or someone in that story made your sweet little anonny (or in my case, cold dead salty) heart fall in love. So just keep fandoming and loving Sansa exactly how you want in a way that makes you happy!

(And on a totally mature, adult end note: fuck people who say Sansa isn’t Stark enough, what ever the hell that even means!? They are just jealous they don’t look that Boss 👏  Ass 👏  Bitch 👏  decked out in furs like a badass Northern Lady Pimp! QUEEN SANSA OF THE HOUSE SNARK, FIRST OF HER NAME!!!)