#something something it’s Joel’s fault that Lizzie is out first

[lyraofthestarsss]

“CAN I PUSH HIM INTO THE VOID?!”

“…You can”

Full Subtitles vvv

Joel: okay so… my task is that I have to kill or do at least 10 hearts damage to Scott without him finding out

*Lizzie gasps*

Joel, continuing: please help me, and do damage to Scott and-

Lizzie, excitedly: CAN I PUSH HIM INTO THE VOID?!

Joel: …You can

Later, Lizzie brings Scott to The End and tries to hit him off the cliff

Scott: *gasp* Lizzie!

Lizzie: yeah?

Scott: that was one heart of damage *laughs*

Lizzie: ohhh that’s not a lot :(

*enderman pushes her off the cliff*

Lizzie: Oh my god!

Scott: laughing and screaming: OHHH LIZZIE!!

[wren-kitchens]

it was not your fault but mine

in which joel tries to kill scott and ends up having a panic attack. (3641 words)

content warnings: panic attacks, lots of mentions of death

i’m being so normal about traffic scott and joel rn guys

joel’s breath is coming too fast and too shallow for him to be able to convince himself that he’s fine, even as it tears at his throat. tears blur and warp his vision, welling up in his eyes faster than joel’s ability to wipe them away with his sleeve. his ribs threaten to crack against his heart, hammering against the inside of his chest like it’s trying to escape. joel can’t blame it.

it’s been hours- okay, it’s been four stupid hours, and he still can’t calm himself down from today’s events. everyone else has been able to sleep, to rest, to patch themselves up and recuperate with their team- or what’s left of it. everyone else is fine, they’re all fine, and they’re going to be fine until they die in whatever unjust, careless death they can’t escape anymore.

for the past four hours (four fucking hours- it’s so stupid-) joel has been failing to get a firm grip on the last remaining threads of his sanity. he thought he was fine- he thought he was safe from that bloodlust, that agony, that grief. but as always, the looming threat of his inevitable breakdown hangs over his head like an anvil-

(mumbo tried to turn on them, mumbo tried to send them to their graves with anvils, mumbo failed and then he died-)

not an anvil. just- anything but an anvil. dripstone- hangs over his head like dripstone-

(joel can see the spot where lizzie dropped dripstone on his head, lizzie dropped it on him because he was the last resort, lizzie was here and joel asked her to hurt scott, and she tried and was killed-)

scratch that metaphor entirely.

just- void, he’s so tired of waiting for that snap, of fearing what will inevitably make something inside of him break and lose himself in the grief-fuelled bloodlust. maybe dying first wouldn’t be so bad; you don’t have to watch as everyone else leaves you.

even through his yellow sanity, joel’s mind seems to be on its way out, and he finds himself wanting to give in. just give in- kill some people, lose a battle and die in a crushingly painful way. it’s easier, isn’t it, than trying to hold onto the threads that slice at his hands once he has a secure hold. besides, if he dies, he can be with them again.

before he even registers the action, joel finds himself gripping his axe with a kind of determination he hasn’t felt in a little while. sure, he’s yellow, but he can’t imagine the big winged fuckers getting too pissy if he went and killed someone. he’s just starting the party early, after all.

joel seems to be zoning in and out, as moments later, he finds himself treading the well-known path to scott’s, knowing that- well. if he’s going to kill anyone, it may as well be scott, right?

smug, crude, stupid scott; who stood by and watched as lizzie was flung into the void, who laughed as joel failed his tasks, who has either won or almost won three out of four of these stupid games. he deserves to be knocked down a peg or four, really. it’s only fair.

out of the corner of his eye, however, joel spots scott’s nametag behind the secret keeper’s statue. oh, of fucking course. scott ‘30-full-hearts’ smajor just couldn’t resist a chance to show off by walking around in the dead of night, huh? piece of shit- like he doesn’t even care that he just let lizzie die.

well, if scott wants to play with fire, he ought to know he’s going to get burned.

-

he’s making a fucking grotto.

scott smajor, winner of one of these stupid games, top three in all games but one, is out in the middle of the night after a wither and warden fight, building a goddamn magic grotto underneath the secret keeper statue. of fucking course he is- fucking show off.

joel watches with utter distain as he prances about with his stupid azalea bushes and his stupid moss and- where the hell did he even get moss in the first place?! honestly, does he not realise this is a death game? they don’t have time to be making places pretty.

finally- finally, scott backs up against one of the stone walls, surveying his stupid pond like it actually means anything. joel creeps along the shadows, the (surprisingly still alive) grass muffling his careful steps towards scott- towards where joel is going to put an axe through his stupid throat and kill him.

“is this really worth the time?” joel says, because he has to- he can’t let scott have all the stupid quips and one-liners, because he would just go insane.

joel might already be insane.

scott looks up, eyes widening in fear as they land on joel’s figure. his whole body lurches away, but joel is too quick—in an instant, joel is in front of scott, pinning him against the wall with the blade of his axe pressed against scott’s throat. joel grins; all manic eyes and sharp teeth and the sweet smell of blood on his breath.

“looks like someone wanted to push his luck, huh scott?” joel says—and even he can admit he sounds a little hysterical now—but scott is trembling, eyes darting all over to find a way out, and that’s all joel cares about right now. “got a little big for our boots on our midnight stroll?”

“joel-“ scott gasps, and even his voice is shaking. “please-“

and- okay, it’s not exactly what joel was expecting. don’t get him wrong- he loves the fear and the trembling and the pleading, but- it’s weird. scott doesn’t fear joel, and he especially doesn’t plead with him, and- now that he’s actually looking at scott, the guy seems kind of- well, pathetic seems too cruel a word. disheveled. weakened. whatever.

“what’s wrong with you?” joel spits, looking him up and down with a distinct sinking feeling in his chest.

the tips of scott’s fingers—currently grasping at the axe’s handle—are a poisonous black, tendrils spidering up his veins. he looks exhausted, as if he’s been up all night, but- scott isn’t that dumb to have not slept. as irritating as it is, scott is a survivor, a strategist. he wouldn’t be in this state if there wasn’t something wrong.

“wither.” scott manages, and joel can’t pretend to himself that he didn’t know- “what’s wrong with you.”

joel’s rage seizes him like a fist again, and he shoves the axe further into scott’s throat. “nothing’s wrong with me you piece of- who the fuck do you think you even are? coming here, middle of the night, flaunting your thirty goddamn hearts-“

“half a heart.” scott breathes, and joel’s mind goes searingly blank.

“what?” joel’s voice is infuriatingly quiet.

scott’s hands have stopped clawing at the hilt of the axe. when did that happen? “i’m- i’m on half a heart.”

“you’re- no you’re not.” joel half mutters because- he can’t be. scott was going to die a long and painful death by his hand, but if he’s going to fall the second blood is drawn- what’s the point? “no, you’re- you’re not.”

“why do you even care?” scott says. “you’re going to kill me anyway.”

“i don’t.” joel says, far less certain than he ought to be. “I don’t care, i’m- i’m happy.”

“tell your face that.” scott mutters.

joel slams his fist against the wall, inches from scott’s face, practically breathing smoke. “you can shut the fuck up, or i’ll kill you where you stand.”

“oh, so you came here and put an axe to my throat because you wanted to protect me?” scott sneers, and- this is all wrong- how has scott gotten the upper hand? joel is threatening to kill him, and scott has the goddamn upper hand.

and it’s so easy- it’s so easy. push the axe in, slide it across scott’s skin and slit his throat. he’d be dead in an instant—it’d barely take a second—it’s so easy. the axe is firm in his grip, there’s no danger of someone interrupting, scott is far too weak to push him off and get away- it’s all so fucking easy.

there’s something distantly satisfying about the way scott flinches as joel gives a scream of frustration, flinging the stupid axe across the goddamn secret grotto. it sticks in the muddy banks of the river at an odd angle, sinking ever so slightly as the earth gives way.

he can’t do it.

he can’t fucking do it.

joel’s breath is coming too shallow again, tearing at the inside of his lungs as he gasps against this invisible force that seems to be sucking the wind from every breath he takes. tears burn in his eyes and it’s only after joel notices how damp the knees of his trousers have become that he realises he’s dropped to the ground, hyperventilating.

is this what a panic attack is? joel is pretty sure this is a panic attack. he is having a panic attack. how does he stop having a panic attack?

he tries desperately to slow his breathing, to straighten up and pretend it never happened, but his thoughts clamour inside his mind far too loudly for him to even begin to calm down. lizzie dead, jimmy dead, mumbo dead- joel nearly killed scott. what if he had done it- what if he killed someone else? there’s too much death, joel can’t be the cause of another death. joel nearly killed scott. lizzie is dead because of scott-

no- lizzie is dead because of joel. he let her- he didn’t tell her he failed- she tried to kill scott and then she died and now she’s gone and joel killed her just like he was about to kill scott and he still can’t fucking breathe-

there’s a hand on his shoulder (he can’t breathe-), squeezing gently through the fabric of joel’s hoodie (lizzie is dead-). scott is saying something- scott is telling him to look at him, and joel thinks his hands are going numb.

“i’m sorry, i didn’t-” joel’s voice is nothing but a broken whisper. he can barely hear himself over the rush of blood in his ears, the taste of iron in his mouth. “I can’t-“

“it’s okay.” scott is saying and he’s wrong because it’s not okay- it’ll never be okay. “you’re okay. you’re gonna be okay.”

“they’re all-“ joel chokes on his words. he can’t even say it. fucking pathetic.

scott takes a trembling breath, which- void, it’s so strange to see him having any emotion at all. “yeah.” he glances down, and the uncertainty of it all is what brings joel back to the present.

joel’s hands are shaking uncontrollably, regardless of how much he tries to stop. scott holds his own out in an unspoken offer, and joel grabs them embarrassingly quickly. their eyes meet, and joel doesn’t look away.

“but they’ll be back.” scott says, quiet. “they’re not lost—they’re still here.”

“but they’re not here.” joel almost winces at how raw he sounds, but he can’t bring himself to. now is not the time for embarrassment, however deeply he is going to regret that later.

scott’s eyes seem somehow more sunken, the bags underneath more pronounced—the scars of nightmares. joel knows those scars well. “I know.”

and- despite it all, it just seems so strange for scott to share that sign of grief with joel. scott, who hides his feelings so well from the outside world, not even jimmy knows all of him; whom joel has contemplated on numerous occasions if he is a robot or not because of this fact; who won’t let himself die to anyone but his allies’ hands since double life.

so joel decides to do what he does probably the worst, and tries to lighten the mood.

“you- maybe he is here. jimmy, I mean.” he blurts. “he- y’know when you wake up after you die and he’s laughing at you for whatever dumb death you just had?”

something flickers in scott’s eyes—almost like candlelight. “usually he’s just annoyed I lasted so long.” he says, a note of amusement lacing his tone. joel jumps on it.

“I reckon he’s here- with lizzie maybe.” joel says, scrutinising every detail of scott’s expression for any signs of reassurance. when did he start caring about scott? “they’re both making fun of us for being so sappy about them- and they’re gonna go tell mumbo so he can join in.”

scott glances down at his hands—still holding joel’s. when he looks back up, there’s something warm in his eyes. “you don’t comfort a lot of people, do you?”

“I- what’s that supposed to mean?” joel says, but it’s too softly spoken to come across as a threat.

“nothing.” scott says, and he sounds like he means it, which is- fucking weird. “you’re doing a good job.”

“yeah, too right I am.” joel says haughtily. he can feel his hands again; his mind isn’t so loud anymore. “thanks.” he says, quieter.

“you’re- you’re welcome.” scott says, apparently taken aback by joel’s humility.

there’s a long pause, and a silence stretches out between the two. it’s not strictly an uncomfortable silence, but it’s extremely strange—silence in these games is a luxury that too often means trap to be trusted.

“this is- this is fucking weird, right?” joel says, barely managing a grin.

scott rolls his eyes, but a smile plays at his lips. “you always have to ruin the moment, don’t you?” he pauses. “but- yes, this is very strange.”

“I don’t like it.” joel says, and.. maybe that was a tiny lie. okay- a big lie, but. just- oh, whatever. shut up. “feels unnatural.”

“I can go back to killing you if that makes you feel better.” scott grins.

joel scoffs. “how about I kill you and we call it even.”

scott huffs a quiet laugh, and the two drift back into a comfortable silence. only- there’s something in scott’s eyes that makes joel think he hasn’t said everything he wants to say. how does he know this, you may ask? well, joel isn’t exactly the most.. open with his feelings; he’s seen that look in his own eyes too many times not to recognise it.

“what?” he asks, and scott practically startles.

“I- what do you mean?” scott says, that look still plastered all over his face. joel isn’t feeling anything at all about the fact scott has started to let his guard down around him. shut up.

“you have that look.” joel gestures vaguely. “like you want to say something but it sounds stupid in your head and you can’t decide if it’s worth it.”

scott blinks at him. “you- how did you-“

“I know everything, scott.” joel says, some of that swagger back in his voice as he half-grins. “but what is it?”

“it’s- I mean you hit the nail on the head.” scott chuckles. “it sounds stupid and I can’t decide if it’s worth saying.”

“well, in my expansive worldly knowledge,” joel says pompously, grinning as scott scoffs at him. there’s something very strange going on in his chest as he notes the fond undertone of it. is he having a heart attack or is he just happy? hard to tell. “it’s almost always worth it. and if it’s not- well, I just had a panic attack because I almost killed you, so.”

“okay, well- you’re not allowed to laugh.” scott preempts, as if joel even has any right to laugh after scott helped him through his breakdown. “but, um. can I hug you?”

joel’s brain seems to have gone entirely blank, and so it’s a surprise to even himself when he says, “yeah- yes. you can.”

scott seems to be genuinely scared of doing anything that might upset joel, which- okay, that’s a whole other thing to have a crisis over later, but it also is kind of funny. oddly enough, it makes it easier for joel to shuffle so he can lean against scott’s shoulder, grinning as scott practically freezes.

“y’know, you asked.” joel nudges him.

scott scoffs a little. “yeah- I know, I just- I assumed you weren’t very.. huggy.”

“why does everyone always say that?” joel huffs. “etho said it, grian and jimmy said it-“ joel is interrupted (very rudely) by scott snorting, and hurriedly covering his mouth. “what?”

“nothing, nothing, just-“ scott grins. “eefo.”

“wh- oi!” joel exclaims, digging an elbow into scott’s side. “i’ve heard enough about that from him, I don’t need you joining in.”

“you’re gonna end up killing me if you do that again.” scott says, exasperated. joel does notice him relaxing though.

“oh no, what a shame.” joel says sarcastically, cackling as scott elbows him back.

there’s a pause, and joel is beginning to notice that there are a lot of pauses with scott. he kind of appreciates it. before joel has time to unpack that, he takes the opportunity to shift into a more comfortable position, which apparently startles scott, if the momentary tense is anything to go by. joel doesn’t get a chance to apologise before scott relaxes and puts his arms around him.

“this whole.. murder thing,” scott starts. “it hasn’t been red bloodlust since- well, ever, has it?”

and- joel wasn’t expecting to be asked that by scott- probably ever in his life, in all honesty. but. he can’t lie and say he doesn’t have an answer.

“I don’t think so.” he admits, quiet. “how long ago did you figure that out?”

“limited life.” scott says, and- yeah. that makes a lot of sense. “I was surprised that you hadn’t gone- well. batshit. and then jimmy died, and you were losing time like there was no tomorrow.”

“yeah.” joel leans a little closer to scott, almost unconsciously. “jimmy is- he’s- well. you know what he’s like.”

“I do.” scott says, a little distantly.

“I don’t- it’s never really.. on purpose.” joel says. “I mean- suddenly someone’s gone, or i’m on my own, and then it’s kind of like- why does it just have to be me? and then that turns into, maybe I should just go. get it over with, y’know?”

“pick fights you know you’ll lose.” scott realises, and joel hums in agreement. “get someone to do it for you so you can pretend it’s accidental.”

“ding ding.” joel says, emotionless. maybe he should feel a little more.. anything about that. he doesn’t.

“fuck.” scott breathes. he squeezes joel a little, almost as if he wasn’t thinking about it- as if it was natural. “I didn’t- I never realised.”

“well, I only just realised.” joel says. “I never really.. clocked it, I guess.”

“and so now.. was that part of it?” scott asks, almost cautiously. oh. gently.

“might’ve been.” joel shrugs. “though, I might just not like you.” he manages a grin and scott rolls his eyes. “who’s to say it’s not both?”

“can I.. tell you something?” scott says, almost hesitantly.

joel gives a soft laugh. “somehow, I feel like you probably can. just a feeling.”

“you have a knack for making things so unserious.” scott tells him, but there’s a smile in his voice. “well, I was gonna say that.. winning is probably the worst thing you can do in this game.”

joel frowns, looking up to peer at scott’s face. to his surprise, he’s entirely serious. “what do you mean?”

“just- it’s all fine until it’s just you, and everyone you know is dead, and you killed half of them, and then- and then it’s all gone.” scott says, suddenly quiet. “you never.. you don’t recover from that. when you’re the only person alive in a sea of blood and bodies that used to be your friends.”

joel gives a long exhale. “fuck.”

“sorry, that’s probably- a bit much.” scott says suddenly, apparently realising the depth of what he just said.

“it’s- well, it’s a lot.” joel says. “but what I- I mean, are you okay?”

scott is silent for a moment. “can you ever be okay in these games?”

“true.” joel says, more to himself than to scott. there’s a long stretch of silence, and joel finds himself wondering whether he should have more silences in his life. he’d tried to avoid them, especially when he was on his own; if he kept making noise, he couldn’t be entirely alone, right? now though, he thinks he’s starting to like them. “i’m sorry i’m always such a dick to you.”

“you- that’s- I don’t mind.” scott says, sounding slightly taken aback. he does sound pleased though, and joel decides to take that as a win. “I mean, I keep killing you. it’s fair enough.”

joel snorts. “yeah, well. still.” he closes his eyes. “I am sorry.”

another stretch of silence fills the little cavern, but this time, it isn’t broken. as the quiet settles on them both like a flurry of snow, it dawns on joel just how tired he is. after all, he’s had a hell of a couple days with very little rest in between them, and- yeah, he definitely needs a nap at some point.

as joel’s eyes begin to close and he nudges closer to scott, ‘at some point’ is starting to look a whole lot more like ‘right this second’. he’s about to sit up again, but scott wraps an arm around him and leans against him as well, and he gets the impression that he’s allowed to sleep here.

it is kind of bizarre that, just earlier today, joel was trying to murder scott—only half because of his task—and now here they are. void, death games are so weird.

joel kind of loves it.

[tybalt-you-saucy-boi]

Let's talk about what Winner's Theory means for the next season of Life SMP, and what we could see depending on who wins Secret Life.

Disclaimer: I know this is just a theory and they don't actually base the new games off of the winners of the previous season, but that's the fun of theorizing.

Etho - Underselling himself, no longer the best at PVP, but with a long legacy of obliterating all competition in death games. Loyal to a fault to his team, with no expectations from them in return. A bit similar to how Scott plays in terms of his alliances, but more likely to be hostile towards others outside of his group. We could see another season similar to Double Life, with game-mechanic incentive to keep your teammates safe at all cost.

Cleo - Similar to Etho, but with a lot more arson. She's also loyal to her team, but if anyone crosses her they will be her biggest target, regardless of a previous alliance. You cannot betray Cleo without life altering consequences. You get one chance and then it's over. I would expect something that will be ruthless and unforgiving if you make the wrong move. Something that feels like stepping on eggshells.

Sidenote: Cleo is the only member of the Divorce Quartet without a win so far, and it would really tickle me if this was her season.

Joel - He's a leader, but also distant from his pack. Only one in his alliance to live outside their walls. First one on yellow. Started a cult. He's with them but he's also with himself. His game is vengeance, for Lizzie, for Jimmy, for Mumbo. His season will be brutal. It will start out brutal and it will end brutally. Players will be picking themselves up from the floor the minute they spawn in. Imagine a season where everyone starts in the Nether. That's Joel's revenge.

Bigb - You thought Cleo was gaslight? This man can pack some fire in his words. And what a season for it! His alliance is pretty much doomed, trying to pull themselves out of the wreckage, but he's got plans that go beyond Skizz and Tango. Right from the get-go with his first task he's marked as the odd one out. He gives out lies like they're candy, and not just for his own preservation, but for FUN. His winner's season will be built on chaos, not knowing where you stand among everyone else, and rewarded for tricking and betraying others. This will be the return of the Boogeyman.

Gem - Big risks, big rewards, bigger fury. The newest member of the series and defying all odds to earn her place in victory, in her season players will face challenges they've never seen before, but will be stronger beyond measure if they come out alive on the other end. Regardless of which life you're on, you'll have just as much chance of winning right up to the end, but the victor must be prepared to risk it all for their spot of glory. This will not be a season to shrink back from and make logical plans before acting. One must have quick feet.

Impulse - Almost the opposite of Gem, Impulse has taken his time, patience is his virtue. He's been so close to winning, but he'll know when the time is right to strike. He'll do whatever it takes, but it will be intentional and planned. I anticipate his season will be one with rough terrain, similar to the big rift in the middle of the Double Life map dividing everyone across a chasm. Reaching other players will be treacherous by foot, but ripe for planning elaborate traps and schemes to secure the win. Most certainly players will need to work hard for it.

Scar - Lone wolves roam free! He's been forced to work for himself alone this season, and so far he's reaped plenty rewards! The next season will give players a motive to work alone, and they will have to build themselves up using their own ingenuity and wits. Making yourself look like an underdog will be vital, stealing will be even more necessary, and the world will be ripe for monopolies. It's a real war out there, and you can't trust anyone.

[kaihuntrr]

The Sea Prince: The Watcher, ‘Civilians’, and Hunters.

To celebrate this au being one of my most favorite things to work on, I’ve made designs for the Solidarity brothers, Big B, and redesigned the trio!

Closeups and introductions under the cut :> here they are!

Now that’s character design! I’m super proud of how they turned out, and they form a rainbow by pure coincidence. Let’s talk about them!

Starting off with the duos!

‘Nosy Neighbors’ & ‘Mean Gills’

Big B is a new one so I’ll talk about him first. I’ll talk about the other three as characters :)

‘Big B.’

Big B is a Watcher; an organization that studies and hunts sea monsters. He used to be a famous vagabond hunter, but due to some mysterious circumstances, he retired early. You’ll meet him much later on in the story, but he’s quite an interesting character! He keeps his secrets. He knows yours. Who knows if he's trustworthy or not.

He seems to have a connection to Grian.

‘Pearl Moone.’

She’s a cocky, energetic person to be around. She doesn’t seem too trusting with strangers, especially hunters. Her accessories are golden, and she has a scar over her left eye so she definitely stands out.

She has a red shell bracelet similar to Scott’s necklace. Are they friends?

‘Scott Major.’

A pleasant, sassy, and entertaining server in the port town the Red Canaries visit. He often flirts with Martyn, leaving the hunter speechless with promises of something more. He’s hiding something. Maybe he’ll tell Martyn his secrets one day?

He swears a couple of necklaces, but one is hidden under his shirt.

‘Martyn Woods.’

The second mate to the Red Canaries. Loyal to a fault, he prioritizes everyone before himself, even neglecting his needs. He believes that his isolated life is worth it, but his feelings change the more Scott talks his way into his life. Is he ready to love again, even after what happened to Ren?

He has a couple of scars, some big ones on his chest. He has a locket and tattoo of a crown and a necklace trinket of the first monster he killed as a boy.

‘Bad Boys’, the Solidarity brothers.

A bunch of new designs here! I referenced their bad boy skins so they have similar ‘leather jackets’. I’m excited for you all to learn about them and their history.

‘Grian Solidarity.’

The youngest adopted brother of the trio. He’s chaotic, but he’s shifty. His birth parents were from the Watchers, but after their death, he was entrusted to the Solidarity family to care for him. They died when he was young, so he doesn’t remember them. He loves his brothers to death and does what he can to protect them and his crew.

He, like his other brothers, keeps a locket with their family photo. He wears a yellow bandana with his name crudely stitched on it. Strangely, he has some similarities to Pearl…

‘Joel Solidarity.’

The awkward, funny middle child. He has the most muscle out of the brothers but he masks it with his pleasant behavior. He quickly accepted Grian into the family and shared his interest in starting the hunter crew. When they were younger, the two would sneak away from their older brother to meet Martyn and Impulse by the docks. Currently, he’s engaged to Lizzie Shadow and is waiting for winter so they can finally tie the knot.

He keeps a falcon feather in his hat as his parents were falconers. He wears his red bandana, also with crude stitches of his name, on his head.

‘Jimmy Solidarity.’

The oldest and most emotional of the brothers. He wasn’t particularly interested in becoming a hunter, preferring to spend time with the birds and become a falconer, but he loved his brothers so he went with it. He’s impulsive, stubborn, but a wonderful and simple person all around.

He keeps his red bandana on his belt, with neat stitches of his name. He has a braided bracelet and a tattoo on his neck.

...and he’s dead.

...or is he?

There’s a LOT going on with these designs, a lot of spoilers in them so what I’ve said could or could not be hints to what’s to come! Not sure when the next design dump would be, but I think my upcoming post would be fun, particularly for those who want to read the story ;) all in due time.

oh, also new life Scott is partially ginger. I predicted that HA- /j I’ll probably whip up art of those two bc. That’s incredibly funny-

Which one of these characters/ designs is your favorite? Let me know! :D

[tubbytarchia]

Jimmy X Life thoughts

This is long (ft. fWhip and Scott and Joel)

TLDR: its all kinda cute but then devolves into Jimmy misery anyway even though he has done nothing

Jimmy's really cute builds??? to lure you in

Obligatory: I only talk about characters

X Life is a goddamn fever dream lol, following are some jumbled thoughts that I've divided into "Jimmy", ""fWhip and Joel", "Jeremyism" and "Scott" thoughts (all in relation to Jimmy). Shoutout to my friend for liveblogging and discussing together with me and pointing out some stuff I missed or better than I could

-- Jimmy thoughts

Jimmy's actually relatively happy within this series, at least at the beginning, and there is no significant "bullying Jimmy" kind of culture thing in place here, even though chronologically this series came after and partially ran at the same time as Legacy where it was very prevelant. They even hold a 100K milestone ceremony for him and it's very cute. Namely though fWhip and Joel treat him very nicely, he even has many really cute interactions with Scott!! I'm not gonna talk about shipping past this one statement but as someone who hasn't liked fWhimmy till now and finds Flower Husbands really interesting but not always healthy, it was... Really relieving to see both of those duos be really cute for me personally. But in spite of this there's still, sigh, a lot of Jimmisery...

Pretty early on, he decides on this thing "Whoever is nice to me gets a stack of diamonds" like, my sweet cheese.... You don't need to give people so much just for being nice to you.... your bank account is in constant ruin!! Lizzie also mods in coffee stuff specifically for him and Jimmy proclaims that any profits he makes from his coffee shops he will split with Lizzie as a thanks... he's so sweet stop it

Near the beginning he's way more assertive than I've grown used to. There's a point where Scott is waiting for him and he can SEE Scott in the distance but then just strolls the shopping district while Scott tells him to hurry up only for Jimmy to mostly ignore him. Another exchange between them goes S: "did I say you could use my villager?" and Jimmy replying "Did I say you could bring me a crab that'd then kill me? Didn't THINK SOOOO!!!". There's so many moments like this and it's so... it's so awesome to see. What changed.... Why can't there be more of this...

But then at some point he starts being harsh towards himself? He starts to call himself an idiot and starts proclaiming "I hate myself" for the most understandable little mishaps and things like?? Son?? He figures out how to make his advertisement poster bigger like everyone else's is and then when he does quickly figure it out all on his own he goes "I hate myself, I really do" WHAT'S THAT FOR. WHAT'S THAT FOR JIMMY!!!! Another moment to point out, Lizzie doing a friendship test thing and she already has pictures of 3 contestants. She calls Jimmy over for him to try and qualify, and when he sees the pictures he says that those look like smart people and he doesn't think he'll make it...

This isn't exclusive to X Life but him building stuff and calling it lovely and being easily excited at discovering the most basic building tricks, but then as soon as someone else is in the picture he immediately starts downplaying himself and calling his building bad...

At some point there's a war that Jimmy really wants to avoid but he gets roped into it by Jack blowing up Peekay's house (totally obliterated that thing) and framing Jimmy for it. Later when there's a confrontation, both he and Peekay clearly know it was Jack, but they fault Jimmy anyway, saying he's escalating things when he's just like. Standing there. Jimmy even ends up asking "what can I do for you to forgive me, for something I didn't do" like no stand your ground man!! You didn't do anything!! Man.... In the end he ends up rebuilding stuff for Jack (why Jack??? I dont know) and when Jack is the first person out of the series, in his Will he stated something along the lines of "I want Jimmy executed because he did a bad job rebuilding my things". And then Jimmy gets set on fire as everyone watches him burn to death. He didn't do anything!!!!!

There's a therapy session after this in which, when Gem asks him to open up, all he says is "Yesterday I woke up and was taken advantage of, that is all"

I think it's Peekay (could be wrong) who also utterly doused Jimmy's house in water as a prank but it... was awful lol. Jimmy's house ended up with lots of holes but at least he was all "I was gonna rebuild anyway". That peeved me so much though... For comparision, Scott pulled a prank on Jimmy where he rebuilt one of his rooms upside down (so kind of moved his furniture to the ceiling) but that's high effort and funny and causes less damage so that's all fair in my books. Good prank. The water dousing was not

He and Scott had a brief prank exchange, but the ONLY thing I can think of where Jimmy was knowingly, unjustifiably in the wrong, was when he cheated on an auction by bidding on a painting after the auction had closed. And even that is such a small offense!! Genuinely all the misery he was caused was just him being caught in the crossfire of other people's shit and it's... ough I don't want to say "he has never done anything wrong" because he totally has but BARELY. Why is it always like this... Hardly ever does he do anything that warrants the things that happen to him

Jimmy's also pretty if not really nice to the mobs, vanilla and modded. In his and Scott's shelter business, he brought in a hostile mob twice with the justification "hostile mobs deserve a home too!!" </3 dawh. He'd make mobs nice enclosures... But then he fucking HATES chickens. He kills them like nothing. Proclaims "I'll enjoy every second of this". Goes "I'll kill only a few of you..." and then kills 10 of them. Violently and instantly kills one stray chicken that escaped his enclosure as Lizzie watches on in horror with the two pandas she just helped bring over. It's kind of insane?? Why.... You're a rancher at heart, what's with the chicken slaughter.... My friend pointed to him canonically being compared to a chicken once. Do with that what you will. Oh also when he came dead last in a race, his immediate reaction upon finishing was to brutally kill his horse?????????? Jimmy??????????????????????????

ALSO he's a good builder?? A lot of people have expressed that Jimmy's building skills have been getting better but I beg to differ, his builds in this series are all really charming and cute? They're not very detailed but they're simplistic and I love it, he obviously has an eye for pleasant looking builds and I'm so SO sad we don't see this too much anymore... There's also a cute moment where he builds a roof out of dirt, says he'll replace it later but apparently his commenters really liked it so he kept it... That's so Jimmy....

-- fWhip and Joel thoughts in relation to Jimmy

fWhip especially is almost (we'll get to that) undingly nice to Jimmy here, and I even felt bad for him in several instances related to Jimmy. Joel is more softspoken as he was in general 3 years ago, and was also almost (we'll get to that) totally nice to Jimmy. At some point they do a horse race and Jimmy comes in dead last but both he and fWhip cheer him on anyway. Joel says "well done Jimmy you nerd" but it's Joel so that counts as him being nice and awesome. It's also very cute that he was partially presenting Jimmy's 100K milestone ceremony, even if it was basically just him calling Jimmy a "wonderful creature" after, to quote my friend, almost vomiting on stage. But it's Joel so it counts

Joel also builds something for Jimmy at some point but whilst they're discussing what it should be like, they land on the word "broken" and Joel goes "broken, like you" and Jimmy replies "broken, like me" like????? Help me this was so early too. That came from NOWHERE. What????? Joel was nice otherwise though... except for one other moment

All three of them create a building business and do acknowledge and agree that Jimmy's not doing the hardest part (building) and doesn't get as much of the profit, seeing as he's just the receptionist. It's still a mostly happy businessship though. They get two bad reviews (from Scott and Peekay) because of Jimmy but all three of them in both instances ultimately agree that Jimmy wasn't at fault. Stuff like Joel taking down a bad review left on a sign saying "the customer isn't always right". Jimmy catches wind of a rumor at some point that he's being fired and when the awaited meeting happens, fWhip and Joel name him receptionist of the month instead, praising him for his hard work in advertising for the business and also making lots and lots of coffee (he's the only one who can even operate the coffee machine lmao. He's really proud of it too, it's very cute. He even keeps bringing it up in an effort for the other two to recognise his value before he gets the news he's anticipating). Jimmy even says "I'm glad that, yknow, you're seeing it. Cus sometimes. yknow. it's really hard for me to feel.. useful. like you guys are building spectacular things and I'm. I'm trying my best." he's genuinely so, so happy and sounds like he's on the brink of tears (claims to be as well)

BUT SIKE PLOT TWIST because I hate myself I went to skim Joel's POV too and he and fWhip actually spoke to one of the other members about Jimmy being a bad receptionist, all "it's Jimmy, you know...". fWhip enforces this and Joel even says "Not to pass blame onto Jimmy but it's all his fault" after which the firing rumor starts to spread. And as far as I could tell, it's forever left ambiguous if they were genuine to any degree when they named him receptionist of the month and this will now keep me up at night. Did they genuinely think Jimmy was at fault in spite of encouraging him that he wasn't? Did they do what they did just to make Jimmy happy even if they believed him to be at fault? Or were they talking shit that one time for no reason...

Joel makes this religion "Jeremyism" to spite Scott (for renaming a bunch of his pets) which Jimmy is the first person to join and is pretty much undyingly devoted to till the very end in spite of the fever dream that spirals from it by the end...

Ignoring that one incident of Joel and fWhip bad-mouthing Jimmy, fWhip was very nice to him, throughout Jimmy's POV at least. I'd like to especially draw attention to fWhip trusting Jimmy to show some other members how to build some houses, like, awgh,,, finally some Jimmy building ability recognition!!! Good for you fWhip!!! They almost exclusively talked in relation to businesses though and at some point made a deal with Jimmy to join Jeremyism if Jimmy would come and basically just hang out with him in the jungle or go on a little adventure. This never happened though

Joel ends up giving up his position as the Jeremyism leader "for content" (??) to anyone who can complete his death obstacle course. Jimmy does, though unfairly by accident (Joel said it was fine though), but finds at the very end of it that someone has already reached this point before him, and of course it was Scott... Scott turns Jeremyism into a proper cult by enforcing rigid rules, his leadership and word, stating that you have to die in order to leave the cult, and his right hand Lizzie demands diamonds as offerings (none of this was a thing before). None of the members seem to be fans, but Joel and Jimmy especially voice and show discomfort, though Jimmy still quickly offers up his diamonds. fWhip fucking burns himself right there thus leaving the cult (king shit) and when he comes to the window from the outside to wave at them, Jimmy is quick to call him a "traitor" and tries to block the view with blocks (this is where I feel for fWhip who has been nothing but nice to Jimmy from Jimmy's POV). Joel makes pathetic attempts at killing Scott with an anvil (fails) and then killing himself (fails)

Gem and Kath put on a therapy session at some point which Jack, fWhip and Jimmy attend. Jimmy states not to want to talk to fWhip (which again hurts) and fWhip makes a subtle jab at Jimmy for never spending time with him in his jungle like he'd promised (totally justified). Jack also hits Jimmy for being part of Jeremyism right at the start, but then when he's jokingly drowning, Jimmy saves him, and he goes "you saved me!! :D". At the end, Jimmy tries to shoot bubbles (not damaging but a nuisance) at fWhip from a distance, at which fWhip starts to run at him to try to lasso him (lassoing a player puts them in a glitchy noclip dimension which they need to relog to get out of). They run around for awhile, fWhip eventually succeeds, Jimmy relogs and then Jack fucking murders fWhip. And then says "I did it for you" to Jimmy. Which, ok. Fast progression, a little insane... fWhip comes back and claims to feel great though. Jimmy pretty much leaves and runs off at this point and unfortunately he and fWhip never make up or have another nice interaction before the finale (I'm quite sure)

Joel uhh Joel just kinda fucks off lol he doesn't even die (Jimmy fills in Joel's grave anyway though)

-- Jeremyism thoughts

Mentioned above how devoted Jimmy was to Joel's religion, and to me it really reads like him finding a home. Like, a genuine home, idk... He really did a lot for it, trying to recruit members and taking care of several Jeremy donkeys and making offerings (Joel also gifted him multiple times)

When Scott takes over, he's clearly very distraught. He tried hard to become the new leader of Jeremyism specifically to stop Scott from ruining it. And yet when Scott does, he can't help but stay, quickly labels fWhip a traitor, offers up his diamonds easily... Even as he's asking for Joel to get up there where Scott is standing, instead of Scott. Jeremyism is done for but Jimmy still holds onto an idea of it

And he does this by literally building a Jeremyism hideout secret from Scott and Lizzy, where he and the other remaining members can hang out. Like come on!! He just wants Jeremyism back... He himself states it's "all I have" and "the one real purpose I had on this server was Jeremyism. And now it's gone" (this is basically before he kills himself and ends his series)

-- Scott thoughts in relation to Jimmy

As I said, they had some really cute interactions. Scott actually treated him nicely and his teasing felt lighthearted enough to not be anything worse than that. They dress up all cute for Halloween, they shoot bubbles at each other, Scott teaches him how to ride a flying carpet, Jimmy's not afraid to be a little sassy back at him... He replaced 3 of Scott's pets as a prank because Scott had gotten him a crab that killed Jimmy at some point, and in retaliation Scott doused his house in crabs, but then they like, ate lunch together date style, it was all good and fun, mutual foolery...

And then this one episode, to quote my friend, someone pissed in Scott's cereal and he's suddenly very dismissive of Jimmy's building skills and contributions like I'd expect to see in Third Life???? They see this arguably amateurishly built hut and Scott turns to Jimmy all accusatory "did you build this??". They build an animal shelter together which is cute but then Scott dismisses Jimmy and says he did almost all of the work and proclaims that he should get almost all of the profits etc. And it pisses me off because just like in 3L, this was a building he just ripped from somewhere else to begin with!! He did lay the foundation and such but you can see Jimmy helping build a decent amount in the timelapse...

At some point he also seems ashamed to admit that Scott helped him with his storage system :(

When Scott reads out Jack's wish to have Jimmy executed, Jimmy goes and basically kneels before Scott, telling him to do it. Scott can't because of spawn protection, but Jimmy gets set on fire instead and he?? Runs to Scott??? He runs to Scott and basically kneels before him AGAIN and Scott does NOTHING and I I don't know I might be insane but. Holy shit this is a fever dream and feels like abstract symbolism but ough that hurt. That hurt a lot. Why did Jimmy run to Scott, why did he kneel/crouch before him as he was burning to death... What was he trying to do... Was he seeking something.... comfort...? Neigh... I just wish to know...

Scott in general is a fever dream in this all by himself though. They all turn up for Jack's funeral and then Scott starts talking about how he tried to be nice and expresses disappointment in having been met with disposition (finding out that Jimmy had a secret Jeremyism cove) acting all "if you want a villain I'll give you a villain!" as if he weren't already one after the cult he turned Jeremyism into and then suicide bombs the entire church still during Jack's funeral. ????? Jesus christ

This screenshot isn't relevant but Im giving it to you anyway

[life-winners-liveblog]

Watching Last Life- session 7

Part 2

Grian: "Where is Cleo?" Lizzie asked calmly.

Martyn: You aren't funny Grian.

Grian: ...excuse you?

~~~~~

Scar: 🎶Where in the world is PearleascentMoon?🎵

Scott: Oh that is the song from Carmen Sandiego right? Nice.

Pearl: No but like, actually, where in the world is other me? How come nobody has seen her?

Grian: How would we know?

Scar: ... ...🎶Well she sneaks around the world from Kiev to Carolin-🎵

Martyn: Stop singing Scar.

Scar: Well that was unnecessary rude wasn't it Martyn? Now I am sure there is no need to be acting like this! Is there?

~~~~~

Grian: It's been like 15 minutes at best and the tower is already covered in lava...fantastic start.

Scar: Rest in peace moss tower, you will be remembered for the...short time we knew you.

Scott: Oh no the tower was actually fine, there is very little lava can actually do against something built mainly of cobblestone.

~~~~~

Grian: Oh look Joel, again, after all of the lava I'm 100% sure he is here for completely innocent reason and not for murder.

Pearl: Give the man a break Grian, It's not Last Life Joels fault he is a pathetic wet cat of a man.

Scott: Now thats just meaner...also very true.

Martyn: So when you talk shit It's perfectly fine but when I do it then It's a terrible sin worth of getting slapped by a fish? I see how it is.

Scott: To be fair Martyn... you do that constantly...and at every occasion.

~~~~

Martyn: Wait where is Last Life Scar? Does he not notice his tower being blown up?

Scar: That's true! Who knows maybe he is in a mystical land of magic-

Grian: Unikely.

Pearl: Maybe he's hanging out with other me who is also nowhere to be found.

Scar: They were both in a land of enchantment and hope-

Grian: Extremely unlikely.

Scott: Nah, She would have definitely told me, plus I found her soon enough while Scar was missing the whole session.

Scar: ohhh ~Magic~

Grian: Scar ...no.

Previous

Next

First

[empressem3rald]

Small thing I wrote in school cuz I was bored :’)

The Canary sings, voice loud and clear. The coalminers hear him, they all happily cheer.

But a coalminer grieves. Grieves for a loss. Amongst all the cheers, he hears the swan . Flying accident? Not. It was of a broken heart. He’s not a coal miner but a grieving swan. He thinks he might follow up with the death of a broken heart.

And not just for his swan, but the canary that was gone. His happiness lasted not for long. The black swan freezes as a coalminer follows. How much more grief can his pure heart handle?

The death of the swan.. oh was he to blame? Was it his, or the second victor’s claim?

The canary and the coalminer’s deaths went to vain. It was the first victor’s fault, and his soulmate from the third game.

The fourth victor’s shadow was nowhere to be found. Could he be hiding in the third victors mound? Either way, he hopes he’s nowhere near. He curses whoever makes these bloody games.

He sees all the previous victors gather to fight. He yells at the fourth victor, to get the bloody hell out. Second victor was getting chased, third victor was hiding away, first victor gets the last hit and then they all celebrate.

He cannot help but feel heavy. How are they all happy? Was it because of the Canary? Or was it of the forgotten coalminer who’s death was a worry.

Or was it that his white swan was out in the void, Death that wasn’t even in the overworld.

Poor little grieving swan, waiting for his happy ending. Could he be the fifth victor? Or will it be his soulmate?

••••

I have no idea what this is, but Its something.

to clear things up about who is who:

The one whom the poem is about is Joel. He’s the “black swan”, “grieving swan” “grieving coalminer”

Lizzie is the “Swan”

Mumbo was the “coalminer”

Jimmy is the “Canary”

Etho is the “soulmate”

First victor - Grian

Second victor- Scott

Third victor- Pearl

Fourth victor- Martyn

The plural “Coalminers” refers to the whole server, I didn’t know how else to refer to them and that felt fitting, so-

[after-nine-at-the-oasis]

something's gone horribly wrong here

I wrote this in a trance last night and then vaguely edited it this morning. it just took over my brain okay <3? enjoy :)

-

“Success!” Grian cries desperately.

Just a few more steps. He runs forward, reaching his hand around his shield-

A wither skull slams into him, sending shockwaves through his entire body. And everything goes black.

“No!” he screams in frustration, and a hint of ironic laughter.

He draws breath to scream again, into the darkness, but it catches in his throat. He pauses. He’s still here.

“Wait- what?” Grian manages to get out. He should’ve respawned by now.

There is silence for a moment. Then-

“WRONG.”

Grian would reach up to cover his ears, if he could. Unfortunately, he doesn’t have a body, so he just suffers the grating shout. And then it registers. They’re here. And They want to talk to him.

“No, no, no!” he yells. Block them out until he respawns, that’s what he should do.

Blessedly, the world starts to come back into view. The grass, the torches, the Secret Keeper. But when he tries to stumble back to the battle, away from Them, he realizes two things: no one is around, and he can’t move. Then Grian sees the gray haze hanging over everything, and he wishes desperately to respawn.

But he doesn’t respawn. And they keep talking.

“SHE DIED FIRST.”

“Agh- that wasn’t my fault,” he responds, head aching. If he had a body, every muscle would be tensed to the point of cramping. And every fiber of him wants to Look.

“THE CURSE THINS.”

Grian doesn’t dignify it with a response. He didn’t know why in the moment, but he felt a vicious gladness when Timmy died second. Sure, he brought Lizzie to Red and Mumbo died directly after him (during quite a destructive event), but he lived.

“HE IS LEFT. HE IS WITH HIM. WHERE IS HE.”

His mind aches, it aches, it’s all-consuming–

“HE HIDES FROM OUR WRATH.”

They’re talking about Martyn, he thinks. He made the right choice – ran as soon as the wither showed up, just like Timmy and Mumbo should’ve done.

Timmy and Mumbo. The grief hits him like a wave. There are still so many Greens left, and they’re gone.

“THERE. WHERE THE OTHER IS. WHERE IS HE. WHERE IS HE.”

“I don’t know!” Grian yells angrily. “I don’t know where he is!”

“HIDING AWAY FROM US ALL THE DAY.”

Martyn doesn’t hide, his brain sluggishly supplies. Not all the time. But everything’s starting to feel fuzzy, and he’s not quite sure on the significance of that.

“WHERE IS HE.”

“I don’t know,” mumbles Grian. “I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know what you want.”

He can feel Them, seething, gnashing Their teeth. They hate this. They hate him. A small grim smile works its way onto what would be his face.

“And I wouldn’t tell you if I did.”

A growling like noise fills the void, but Grian thinks (hopes They don’t have long before he’s back in his body. He hopes They’re not holding onto him too hard. But Their presence grates on his brain, squeezes his lungs, and he wants out, he wants out-

“Ẅ̷̧̳̼̣̫̜̖͈̙̹̹̼̞̲́̍͂̅̾͝H̷͔͖̗̜̳͎̯̻͇͖̜̣̜͖̻̗̩̀̊͑̔̊͌̍̏̾̒͌͐͘̚̕͝͝É̷̡̞͓̫̹͚̱̖̲̬̽̃͋͜͝ͅͅR̷̢̺͇͚̭͖̪͕̞̙̎͌͆́̈͑Ë̷̻͎̦̭̱͉̓͑̑̎͛ ̶̨̛̦̙̲̥̮̥͇̗̖̣͂͗̉͗̈̍̕ͅĮ̸̣̺͖̮̭̠͇̥̩̩̼̦̯͓̈̅̽̄̂͊̽̇̃̇͒̊̇͌͂̕ͅS̷̪̜͈̻̥̈́́̈͠ ̴̢̧̮̠̟̘͚̼̼̖̙̲̜̰̃̑̓̇̓̍͒̏̓̒͆̕͘̚͠͠Ḥ̶̨̢͉̖̙̺̠̩͆̀̊́͂͊̌̎̌̽̕͠Ę̴̛̛͔̪͚͓̰̻̼̫̱̺͍̩̫̼͇̓̿̂́̔̆̒̆̈́͊͘͘͝͠.”

Grian screams. He tries to curl in on himself, tries to get away, but the noise is all around him. Pressing down, pushing the air out of his body. It fades after an indiscernible amount of time, but is replaced with a loud static.

“I don’t know,” he repeats with a gasp. He nearly has to shout over the static, and it only gets louder after he speaks. Another growl joins the crescendo, and the pressure increases and he wants to scream but he can’t, he can’t-

Grian gasps a breath as his feet hit the ground.

Immediately, the sharp stab of wither makes itself known. Before he can regain his breath (it feels like he’s fallen a hundred blocks, like Joel weeks ago, like his soulmate but with no water, like-), he’s moving. Running away from the Secret Keeper, away from the explosions and yelling of the battle. Running away from Them.

“I- wait, what?” he pants. He can feel it. “I’m yellow.”

Etho runs up to him, bleeding from several burn-like marks and covered in dirt.

“Why are you still poisoned?” he calls.

“I- something-,” he tries. “I died as I hit the button and I think it broke, so badly.”

Etho laughs. “Oh, no.”

Grian hit the button, and he can feel his health fluctuating, but after- what was it? After the pause, the break in the battle, he respawned and ran. Something like that. His health should settle soon.

And a few moments later, just after Cleo joins them on the sidelines, before he runs back into battle, it does. Everything’s faded now. He doesn’t remember details of the glitch, so it must have been small.

But somewhere, deep in the back of his mind, there is a scratching echo of a phrase.

Where is he.

[morganas-pendragons]

Ceilings | Joel Miller

Summary: He's gone.

Authors Note: First of all, I am SO sorry for this LOL but this idea has been in my head since the DAY I started watching the gameplays on YouTube and... yeah I'm sorry

Warnings: SPOILERS FOR THE LAST OF US PART ONE AND TWO, MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, ANGST

This is heavily based off of the songs Ceilings by Lizzie Mcalpine. Blame TikTok. This is ALL I have heard over the last week and a half. I'm not sure if this turned out the way I initially wanted it to, but oh well. Here you go!

***

It's pink. The walls are pink, the twins names on either wall written in a brilliant calligraphy are pink against a cream background. The only thing that isn't pink is the ceiling.

He wanted it cream to match the walls. You wanted it white.

That's why you've been sitting here for the last hour contemplating the color of your babies room and ceiling because it's easy. It's easy and after all you have been through... You could use easy.

So could Joel. That's why he chose the girls names the very first time you ever mentioned having kids. After years worth of fear of being a father, of failing at being a dad to his own babies and to Sarah, you'd coaxed him into a state that had Joel Miller fully embracing his love for you and his desire for a future.

The girls names were to be Charlotte and Eliza. Charlotte Miller and Elizabeth Miller.

Charlie and Eliza.

Previously

He's been thinking about it a lot more since he came back to Jackson. Thinking about that time when you, he and Ellie had first arrived, when Joel had come rushing out onto the street in the midst of a panic attack and found himself staring into the past.

Or what should've been the future.

Joel had thought he'd seen Sarah out on that snow-covered road. Sarah, with her mass of curls, opening her arms to embrace a daughter who looked exactly like her. A life Sarah should've been able to have. A granddaughter that Joel should've been able to love.

He's been thinking about it more. The possibility of another child, of having a second chance - as Ellie was already more then enough proof he'd been given a second chance - to raise a child of his own was something Joel quietly yearned for.

To hold his own baby. To make up for his mistakes.

It had been something the two of you had talked about when Ellie wasn't paying attention. You had been the one to initially bring it up. Claiming that you believed he'd be a good father, that he'd been a good father, and what happened to Sarah had not been his fault.

It had been twenty some years since he'd held his daughter as she died. It never got easier. Not then, not now, not in the quiet darkness of the bedroom he now shared with you in Jackson.

"I think I'd like to try," Joel whispers. You turn your head away from where it's been buried in your novel, eyes seeking his out in the dark as Joel turns to look at you over his shoulder. "To talk about kids again. To talk about having them with you."

Your smile could rival the sun. This isn't something he'd comfortably admit in front of other people, but that's never been an issue with you. Joel's practically already laid his bleeding soul at your altar so many times in the last couple of months. There's nothing you don't know.

There's things you know that even Tommy doesn't know.

"Are you sure?" You ask gently. "Are you sure that this is something you want?"

"If it's worth it to you, Sunshine-"

You're deliberate in your movements as you cross the bed to hold his chin in your hand. Joel's breath catches as you press the pad of your thumb into the divot of his chin. "It's not just about me," You say. "It's also about what you want, Joel."

He can see it. He can see a little girl running around on bare feet in the early hours of the morning in their house as you stand over the stove to prepare breakfast.

He can hear it. Laughter.

He can feel it.

The same love he'd felt for Sarah. Something he'd thought was dead.

"It is what I want." Joel whispers. "But there's something I need just as bad."

"Which is?"

"You." He holds up a red velvet box, and your whole world comes stuttering to a halt. "To marry me."

***

Bedsheets... No clothes... Touch me like nobody else does...

Lovely to just lay here with you.....

He's so warm. Joel is like the sun has come down to meet you on the cold grounds of a now desolate Earth, warm and comforting and present. He's been stretched out on his side of the bed for the entire night.

No nightmares. It's a quiet relief that you revel in because it's the first time in all these months you've known him where he's known peace.

And really, isn't that what you've wanted?

You're kinda cute and I would say all of this

But I don't wanna ruin the moment

Careful not to wake him, you pull the sheets up over your bare chest and prop your head up with one hand to drag your fingertips across the expanse of his back. So much fine muscle. Fine, toned muscle that moves with every breath he takes as Joel remains in deep sleep.

The ring on your finger gleams as the early rays of the morning sun begin to fracture through the plain-colored curtains on the windows.

Mrs. Miller has a nice ring to it.

When Joel does wake up is when everything really comes alive. Your cheeks redden when he captures you in the cage of his arms, dark eyes bright and happy - because he's married, and he's content, and he's in love - aa he leans down to kiss you. It's so odd to see him so at peace especially with the lingering issue of the divide between him and your sister just out of reach.

Because while your lives together may be just beginning, the contempt and resentment your sister harbors flows from her little garage where she chooses to live. To live without you and Joel.

It is what it is.

Lovely to sit between the comfort and chaos

***

A Few Weeks Later

You'd been with Joel for most of the morning doing a supply run about fifty miles outside of town. You'd struggled with nausea for the greater duration of the morning, feigning ignorance to the real reason and claiming that it was simply something you'd eaten the night before. He'd been too focused on the goal of why you were out there to begin with.

But it's over Then you're drivin' me home

"I've got just the right thing for dinner," Joel remarks as you pull into the main gates of Jackson. "That soup I make that you love."

You kick up your feet onto the dash and grin as you tuck your hands behind your head. "The one with the beef, potatoes and spinach?" You reply. "That is my favorite."

"Of course it is. I'm a phenomenal cook."

"You can make three things in total, Miller," You hold up three fingers and curl one by one. "Soup, sandwiches, and salads. Anything else is out of your league." Leaning outward, you tip your head up and turn around so you are resting your head in his lap as the truck comes to a gradual stop. "Just like I was."

He doesn't reply. Not as the young adults swarm the truck to unload the supplies and take them into the appropriate storage units, leaving the two of you alone before Tommy and Maria inevitably come looking to question you and if you encountered anyone on your trip.

Joel's wearing that soft, tender look. That look you so very rarely see because that's not who other people know him to be. That's not the Joel Miller. The infamously stoic, cold and sharp man who's renowned for his brutality and violence that's brought down grown men. The man has more blood on his hands than anyone else you know.

But you love him anyway. You especially love him in these quiet moments where those walls he builds around the people of Jackson fall and he's just the quiet man who wants to love. To be loved.

You sit up and move to wrap your hand around the door handle.

And it kinda comes out as I get up to go

You kiss me in your car

And it feels like the start of a movie I've seen before

"I love you." He blurts out. Your eyes widen just as scarlet dusts his cheeks, and you're so taken off guard because it's the first time he's said it out loud. You surge forward and capture his mouth with your own as you press his shoulder into his own door.

Your laughter is what has Joel pulling away like he's been burned because the next thing you know, someone has opened his door without him realizing it and caused him to fall straight backward into a snowbank.

"Joel!" You curl your fingers around the side of the seat as Joel rolls to the side and upward to glare at you where he now sits wet and grumpy in the snowbank. "I'm going to find Maria. Have fun getting yourself out of those clothes!"

"Try telling me what you really want, Sunshine!"

"You!" You call over your shoulder with a wicked grin on your lips. "Clothes off!"

Reality settles in as you approach Maria's house. If your assumption is correct, and your gut usually is, then your pregnancy is about to absolutely tear Joel's world out from under his feet.

You're not sure that's a good thing.

***

Life goes on anyway. Your sister has made no effort to reconcile with Joel - and in her own right, as Ellie fully believes she has a justifiable reason for her ire against both you and him - and has no intentions to do so until you approach her garage after your return from your supply run with a test in your hands.

A positive test. A test Joel didn't know about.

''El," You call as you knock on the door. "Can I come in?"

There's a brief period of silence before someone is shuffling behind the door before approaching it. Ellie's form waits on the other side, brow raised in question as her eyes flicker between your own and the test in your hands.

"Whatever that is, I want no part."

And that's what causes it. Your gaze hardens as you shove your way inside of her garage, purposefully ignoring the guitar that Joel gave her by the bed. "You don't get to do that with me. You might be able to do it with Joel, but not with me." You snap. "This is your niece or nephew. This is our family. You don't get to just walk away from that."

She seems tired of the arguments. You don't blame her, but after what Joel had done for her, you'd expect her to at least act grateful. Even if she could defend herself.

"I don't screw around with liars." Ellie says evenly. "I don't care if they're family. The very least you could do is act like you committed some atrocity by lying to me of all people."

She wants an apology. If that's all she wants, then you'll give it to her.

"Ellie, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I had to lie to you for a reason that you will not understand until you are a parent and have lost a child." You screw your eyes shut and clench your hands at your sides. "I'm sorry that what Joel and I did in that moment in the hospital was for you, not against you. And I'm sorry that your inability to forgive either of us will most likely cost you a relationship with your future niece or nephew."

Turning sharply on your heel, you don't give her the satisfaction of even beginning to formulate a response before you're slamming the test on her side table and slamming the door behind you.

Ellie stares at the two bold lines on the test after you've left for far longer than she cares to admit.

***

Joel leaves that afternoon with Tommy. You share one final goodbye on the snowy road that leads out of Jackson, bathed in afternoon light as you lean backward and smooth out the fabric of his jacket.

The news of your pregnancy still sits heavily on the forefront of your mind. You'll tell him when he comes home.

When he comes home.

"Joel?"

The way he looks at you in that final moment will be burned into your mind forever. Joel Miller has never looked at anyone quite like that. There's something that lingers there, something you will never quite be able to comprehend because it is something he keeps hidden and reserved for only himself.

"Yeah, sunshine." He murmurs softly.

You run a tender thumb along the apple of his cheek as you stand on your tiptoes and whisper, "I love you. Come home." in his ear before he turns his head to do the same to you. Your cheeks darken as Joel cups your face in his hands to kiss your forehead.

And then he's gone, like he was never really there.

His ghost will always linger inside of those gates.

***

You wait. You wait, and you wait, and he doesn't come.

You wait for news. For someone to appear at your door to break the news to you that the father of your children will not be coming home.

The news comes from Ellie's return after the snowstorm. Ellie, who's coming through the main gates of Jackson with Dina, Jesse, and Tommy who sits in the tailgate of the truck with his forehead pressed to the top of a bloody tarp. Just the sight of Tommy alone has fear curling through your blood stream because he is wrecked.

Ellie is sobbing. Gut wrenching sobs that have her doubled over at the waist as Dina helps her out of the car, desperation and a quiet cry for help evident in her aspect as you slowly stumble outside and down the stairs.

Trembling fingers pull away the tarp and reveal your husbands bloody remains. Jesse's quiet retelling of the story plays like static in your ears as you stare at the remains of that once gentle face that's now unrecognizable. Golf club. Vendetta. Captured Tommy and Joel. Beat him to death.

Your breathing comes in frantic and short gasps as you scream, piercing and raw, loudly enough to carry across the entire town and alert them to the newly widowed woman who stands on the Miller property.

He hadn't even known he was going to be a father.

And now he never would.

***

Ellie comes back from searching for her. Abby. According to Dina, the girl who killed your husband isn't dead.

But she's the reason why you give birth alone. Ellie isn't there. The only person there is you and Maria.

Joel's ghost lingers. But he's still very, very gone.

***

When Tommy says he's going to visit your sister's quaint house in the fields with her wife and baby, you demand to tag along and ask Maria to tend to the girls while you do. It's been nine months. Nine agonizing months that have been spent alone in your misery while you quietly mourn your husband.

Too many people had been afraid of Joel. He hadn't let enough people know him. That was why it was just you and Tommy at his graveside the night you buried him. That's why it's just your tears that water the soil there atop it.

Joel Miller

Beloved father and friend

You were furious with her for not finishing the job. For someone who so easily fell into patterns of violence - violence had never bothered her, Ellie had always been slightly fascinated by the darkness of it - it was infuriating to find out that she'd just let Joel's killer walk.

Sitting outside the house on your horse, you absently fiddle with the rings that lay heavily on your neck.

Ellie freezes at the sight of you. It's the first time you've laid eyes on each other in nine months. She hasn't met her nieces. You haven't met her baby either. It's quite strange, sitting here in front of family and feeling like complete strangers.

"She won't go find her, Sunshine. She won't finish the f-"

You hold your hand up to halt Tommy's angry rambling as he slings himself onto the top of his own horse. "Ellie is an adult who makes her own decisions," You say calmly, and the fact that there is not an ounce of emotion in your tone shakes Ellie to her core. "Even if they're bad ones."

"Sunshine-" Ellie interjects.

Ice flickers through your gaze as you remove a photo from the inner pocket of your coat. It flutters on the wind and settles at her feet.

"When you find her," You say. "You tell her what she took from me, and you make her pay for it."

That's all you leave her with. Ellie is left helpless to do anything but watch as you ride away, so different from the sister she knew, back in the direction of Jackson where your daughters wait for their mother to come home.

She stares at the photo of her nieces so long her eyes start to burn. The bottom reads Charlie and Eliza, nine months and they're playing together on the floor in front of the window while the sun shines down around them.

They're the spitting image of you and Joel. Joel, who is not here any more, because he's dead.

She takes the photo just quickly enough to then turn and vomit into the grass.

****

Abby sees it that night on the beach. A photo. A photo of Joel Miller's daughters, barely a year old, growing up in a world without their father.

She leaves it there.

But she doesn't forget.

****

But it's not real

And you don't exist

And I can't recall the last time I was kissed

They're five the first time they ask about him. Charlie found the guitar, your guitar, propped in the corner of the room against the photo you've kept face down since the year he died.

Until recently. Now your wedding photo stands proud on the sill, right next to the guitar that was last played by Joel.

"Mama?"

"Yes, baby."

They look so much like the both of you. Charlie is practically Joel's clone in personality where Eliza is your gentle spirit who prefers to use her words rather than her hands to make peace.

You haven't realized how much they resemble their mother and father until right now.

And it makes it hurt that much more.

It hits me in the car

Eliza frowns - which is exactly identical to Joel's frowns, and the sight of it makes your heart ache that much more - as she approaches you both on the sofa beside her sister. "Who's this?" She murmurs, running her little fingers across her father's face.

And it feels like the end of a movie I've seen before

"That, little hellions," Ellie calls as she enters the living room with a bowl of popcorn propped on her hip. "Is your Daddy." Charlie and Eliza flock to their aunts legs to linger there as she walks deeper into the room and takes the photo from their hands.

You're careful to watch as she runs her thumb over Joel's face. Once, twice, three times.

Maybe she had loved him more than you realized.

"Let me tell you about him."

[cryptic-bee]

Decided I had to write Lizzie's POV because I felt like I didn't get my point across in Jimmothy's and I'm still insane over Seablings smile

anyways something something Lizzie wants the world to burn but a conversation with her brother reminds her it needs to be a controlled fire or something like that

does that make sense. do I word good enough

You can read Jimmy's POV here!!

•

It's not fair.

A blast of warmth consumes her as she enters the space after death, a stark contrast to the freezing temps of the void she'd found herself falling into moments ago, and it's not fair.

She hadn't even wanted to be part of these stupid games! But when Joel had mentioned another one starting, another period where she was left behind for Void knows how long, she couldn't stand the thought of letting him go through it alone again. It was bad enough, watching him lose his mind during the last one. Watching him lose it upon Jimmy's death, jolting awake in the middle of the night upon Joel's sudden return, upon his death. She'd never get that look out of her head - a fear she only ever saw at the end of the games, how he'd fallen into her arms and sobbed as she could do nothing but whisper to him and-

Lizzie sighs, picking at the loose threads of her dress. It's not fair.

Why her, of all people? Why was she always the one to forget, to be left behind? It wasn't fair. She wants to scream, at who she isn't entirely sure yet. But she wants to scream, to let out this stupid pent-up rage she always gained during this stupid game and-

And she's so tired. She just wants to go home.

Where is that? She wonders. She'd forgotten that long ago.

Distantly, she can hear Jimmy celebrating, and she can't help but glare into the nothingness. She can hear him being congratulated by other players and it's just not fair. Somewhere beneath it she can hear Joel calling for her, the only one who came to her party, but it's drowned out by the praise and it's like her death doesn't even matter and it's not fair it's not fair.

She shouldn't have gone to the End. She knew, she knew it was dangerous- Why had she done that? It was stupid, she knew it was stupid, so why-

Oh.

That's right. She had done it for Joel.

And somewhere she can remember being told to trust no-one, not when you're part of the Life games, and she's reminded of that look her husband had after that she can never forget. There's an ache, a flame threatening to spark beneath her ribs and she wants nothing more than to burn. But she can't, because the Void had claimed her before she could, and it's just not fair.

She feels it as a new presence enters the After-Void.

Lizzie watches, a match tossed into the already lit flame, as Jimmy celebrates his "win". Her death means nothing, she thinks. Her death means nothing because he wasn't the one in her place.

There's a part of her that wants to run to him, to cheer him on and congratulate him and he had done it! He had done it, because of her. She clears her throat, and it's a small victory when he nearly jumps out of his skin and screams.

"Congrats!" She puts on a smile, tries not to show how much she was hurting. But she lets the anger show. She wouldn't try to hide that. "You did it. Congratulations, Jimmy." Brother, she wants to say instead. Malicious and betrayed and hurt.

There's something painfully familiar about it, about being the only two left in a world only they were a part of. She watches as he reaches a hand up to his neck and her breathing hitches, knowing he must have thought it too. She squeezes her wrist to stop herself from doing the same.

"Lizzie-" His voice breaks on her name, and what right did he have to cry now? She was the one who died first. She was the one being ignored. "I wasn't- I didn't mean to-"

"To what, gloat?" Lizzie laughs, and she'll admit it came out harsher than she'd intended. It wasn't his fault she had died, but..She waves him off. "I'd have done the same. I mean- 4 seasons? You should be celebrating!" She wants to cringe, hearing herself speak like this.

There's an awkward silence between them, thick and suffocating and suddenly she regrets ever coming here.

"I didn't-" He pauses, and she can see the internal conflict he's having in his head. It was easier to resent him when he wasn't right here in front of her.

It's not fair, she thinks to herself. She hadn't chosen to leave him behind first, she hadn't chosen to forget everyone she ever loved, so why- Why was she being punished for it? She never wanted to, if she could go back to that lifetime and knock some sense into that stupid Ocean Queen she would in a heartbeat, but she couldn't do that. So now she had to be the one to be abandoned? It's not fair, it's not-

But he's looking at her with those sad eyes she never wanted to be the cause of, with cursed golden feathers and scars from death after death and he's scratching at his neck like he can tear it back and reveal gills long forgotten and-

It's not fair, blaming him for her sorrows.

So Lizzie, too tired to keep the flame alive anymore, just takes his hand - pulling it away from where he'd been digging his nails into the side of his neck. "It's okay, Jimmy. You made it. That's all that matters now, right?" Despite herself, she can't help letting some of that anger slip through.

Eventually Jimmy nods, gently squeezing her hand, and she does her best to not fall apart. "I didn't mean to make you a Red," He says after long minutes of silence, that inner turmoil never settling.

Lizzie tilts her head, a small laugh. "How many times are you going to apologize for that?" And she knows, she knows that's not what he meant, but she'll let him believe whatever he needs to. Because she was his sister once upon a time, and he still needed her, and she had time to be angry at the world later. "I already told you it was just a silly mist-"

"I missed you."

She pauses at that, and her heart aches for their lifetime in the sea once more. Lizzie can feel herself tearing up, but she refuses to break down - not in front of him. So instead she smiles, pulling him down into a hug so he couldn't see. She can't find her voice at the moment, and it's hard to navigate, now that her little brother has wings instead of fins, but she hopes the point gets across anyway.

It's not quite forgiveness, not for what she'd been put through. But it was a start. An understanding.

A new presence stumbles in as they pull away, stumbling till he trips to the invisible floor and shouting something about a...fence post? He stops, cuts himself off upon realizing where he was, and looks to the other two players.

"We're really bad at this, aren't we?”

[biinaberry]

I just read through your SOD au, and MAN is this stuff wild and grimey and so interesting.

Though I do want to know the other emperors opinions on Tumble Town and the sheriff if that's something you've got

apologies for the late response but I've been dealing with finals. There 4 main categories Jimmy puts the emperors in; friends, neutral, neutral-enemy and enemy

oli- Drinking buddy, "You play guitar??" Oli is pretty positive towards Jimmy but does worry for his serious attitude Sausage- Best friend, trauma buddy, <3, He cares for jimmy immensely but with their own shared trauma of losing their family and home he wants the other to find help Shubble- The two have an alliance built on helping eachother shubble with the school and jimmy with bandits. Shubble however is cautious of jimmy and is very aware of his temper False- Her biggest buyer of iron and the two have a cordual relationship. But she is also aware of how snippy/his general distaste is for most of the empire Pixl- Understands what Jimmy went through but wants to show that it is not his direct fault that tumble town was not well documented Gem- Slightly hurt by his hostility towards her. Their empires had the longest alliance with eachother and she wants to rebuild their reputations, but is aware it is too late Scott- Finds Jimmy very hot but is turned off with his serious nature and snippy attitude while at meetings. Definitely knows now not to joke about his hat and outfit. Lizzie- Tries to stay calm around him but something about him makes him stand on edge. She doesn't like staying in the same room as him Joey- "Hellooooooo nurse" Really wants to bone Jimmy but would never admit it bc he fears he will be shot in the face by all of tumble town. Finds the serious lone wolf vibe hot as well as a turn off, he is very confused Katherine- Doesn't understand how a man could stay bitter for over ten years. She swears the man is under his own curse but Jimmy always shoots her down. Wonders what it would be like to go hunting with him since he owns a rifle. Joel- Immense regret. He blames himself for Jimmy turning out like this because it is true. He wants to admit the truth about what happened to his empire but fears how it will ruin everything he has built with these emperors. He still sees jebediah in Jimmy. Fwhip- Had a massive crush on the man when they first met which got ruined when Jimmy nearly spat in his face. He believes the man is way too self centered and needs to be humbled. Doesnt want to be near him after Jimmy threw him to the ground once after grabbing his hat.

[lapetitsorciere]

The Crown… Who now wears the Crown?

It was more than just a terrible idea to bring back the Crown that caused so much trouble before. Pix as an archeologist and a historian, one of his kind on the server should have thought everything through before putting it on, or even before taking it from the place, where it was hidden, he should know more than others do about it and the things that were happening because of it. He shouldn’t have been so naïve at the first place and here are some reasons:

1) The catastrophe which caused the end of all the empires thousands and thousands years ago and the awful things that happened through its fault. 2) There is three villains on the server already: Jimmy (the most safe from all of them), Shelby who isn’t yet sure of what she is doing and proclaimed herself a villain almost for no reason at all (+ she just feels comfortable with her sculk) and Sausage Supreme – one of the most powerful creatures, probably in all dimensions, who is hungry for power and for blood. And it is more than enough, considering the fact that Lizzie has a great villain potential. 3) Goodness Gracious! There are too much people who’d like to try the Crown on and take advantage of the power that it is giving, but it is unknown how exactly would they use it. Pix made it even more tempting to get setting his rule. 4) The Crown itself might be cursed.

Now something about what could the Rulers ask for, wearing the Crown and the consequences of it:

The Ruler – The Rule – The way of getting the Crown – The way of losing it.

King Pix – Bring one item of national importance to your Empire to donate to the museum. – Got the Crown from the chest that was hidden behind the mural in the catacombs. - Was withered away on The Princess Tea Party and became a ghost, so his reign didn’t last long. (There are two possibilities – either it happened because of the Crown itself, or it was a Sausage Supreme move. Yeah, or in was all because of the Fae we know nothing about or something else we have no clue about either.)

King Scott – Build something of your choice in Chromia. – Got the Crown when Pix died, because he was close to the place of his death. – Who knows what can happen to him, because there is too much going on – the evil ones and the people who can decide to get the Crown for themselves for the reasons of their own, and also he is an adventurer, so he may give up the Crown for somebody else, or the mysterious something cam kill him. • From here on no order yet:

Queen Lizzie – ? (Can be anything, including something mischievous) – Probably killed somebody just for fun or made them give it to her to try on for the same reason, or found it when the current owner was away fighting something, which could make them loose the Crown, so they decided to hide it in their Empire somewhere in a safe place, or because he was close to the place of death of the previous Ruler. – The same as with Scott, except for the traveling aspect and giving the Crown up for somebody else.

King Joel – ? Probably something that can praise him or entertain him. – Probably killed someone, because he wanted to find out how it would feel to be a God and a King at the same time, so it is almost the same as if it was done just for fun. – The same as Lizzie, but also can make a tournament in his own honor.

King Sausage – ? Most likely – the Establishment of peace in all of the Empires (and maybe – build a temple of Saint Pearl in each Empire), and/or assemble the forces to defeat the common enemy. – Either got it, because he was close to the place of death of the previous Ruler, or because he won the tournament for the Crown, or because he killed its previous owner, because they were possessed by someone or something. – The same as Joel, but would give the Crown up for Pearl if she would be willing to take it.

King Sausage Supreme – To become his slaves and to serve his needs and/or to accept their death. – Most definitely killed the previous owner of the Crown, because wanted to rule the whole world and have his revenge on Sausage, or ordered someone, for example: Shelby to do it for him, for the same reason. – Most likely was defeated by Sausage, or Sausage and Joel, or Pearl, or any other combination of the same people, or by the collective forces of all of the Empires.

King Jimmy – To be finally respected properly and to be returned his normal size (may be also – to bring Tiny Tom to their dimension from the Hermitcraft). – Most likely, because he was close to the place of death of the previous owner of the Crown, because he can hardly do anything properly and the chances that he won’t fail to kill somebody are very, very low. – the same as Lizzie.

King Joey – To get him anything valuable, everything valuable that can be found on server or becoming his crewmates in case of the appearance of Sceletrone. – Most definitely killed the previous Ruler just for fun and to find out whether Katherine would love him now and so he would have a higher position than Shelby to make her go out of his way. – the same as Lizzie, but would give up the Crown to Katherine if she would ask him about it the right way.

Queen Katherine – ? Probably to help her to bring her kingdom back to normal. – Either got it because it was given to her, or because he was close to the place of death of the previous Ruler, or because she had to kill them for they were possessed by someone or something. – The same as Lizzie.

Queen Shelby - ? Maybe – save her from the sculk if she finally understands that it is not good at all or to follow Sausage Supreme, or to become officially accepted by the witch society. - Either got it because it was given to her, or because he was close to the place of death of the previous Ruler, or because she had to kill them for any possible reason. – the same as Lizzie, but possibly would give the Crown up for Sausage Supreme if he would manage to convince her to do it.

Queen False – ? Maybe – to get her back to Hermitcraft and/or to restore her memory completely. – Because she was close to the place of death of the previous Ruler (unlikely) or because she found out that someone mysteriously gave the Crown up for her (highly unlikely). – the same as Lizzie, but probably will give it to somebody else, for example to Pix to get read of it. (It is unlikely that she will even get the Crown at the first place.)

King Fwhip – ? (Can be anything, including something mischievous) – Probably killed somebody just for fun or made them give it to her to try on for the same reason, or because he was close to the place of death of the previous Ruler. – The same as Lizzie.

Queen Gem – ? To get into her Sun religion. – Because he was close to the place of death of the previous Ruler. – The same as Lizzie.

King Oli – ??? Maybe – to help him to bring up his Dragon-baby? Or to forgive all of his debts? - Because he was close to the place of death of the previous Ruler. – The Same as Lizzie, but if he would decide that it is too much responsibility for him, he would, probably give it to Eddie and establish peace between Empires or to Sausage, hoping for the same thing. (How would he even manage to get the Crown?)

What can even go wrong?

Can we just give the Crown to Hermes? It would be fun and by all means great, and the world wouldn’t face any catastrophes.

P.S. The Fae is an interesting creature – it asks for something and gives something in return, but there is a big But – it causes a lot of damage and harms the one she benefits if the one does something wrong or just not quite the way it was asked to be done. It told Sausage that it appreciates Sanctuary and then asked for help (after him and Joey tried to bring turtles to the isle, because the pirate called it Plantina and decided that it is his child now and sausage is the only one who is a good patent capable of raising a child, so he can give him some good advice), obviously understanding that Joey is not very good at granting its wishes. It asked Joey for help and Joey did it, it asked for help once again and Joey and Sausage did what it asked for, but it didn’t satisfy the Fae for the first time, so Sausage had to sit on the isle and wait for turtle eggs to hatch for a long, long time as a punishment and only then it was satisfied. It asked Jimmy for help and gave him wings when he needed them the most, but he was cursed, when he did what it asked then not completely as it told him, so now he can’t get rid of the Scull of the First Creeper (it doubles each time Jimmy tries to destroy it and he can’t manage to give it to the Fae) and unintentionally destroys everything around him and it almost threatened him. It asked Katherine for help and asked for it again when she and Lizzie fulfilled but nothing else has happened yet. It asked Lizzie for help and told her that it will help her to get a Princess Dress and it did, but Lizzie had to fight a warden to get it. And the other interesting thing is that nobody can hear it, except for the person it talks to. P.P.S.: Plus, there are very few people on the server who know the secret of the Fae (That’s a Behind the Lore bit.) and that’s not a Sausage thing! Sausage confirmed that he knows nothing about it (yes, not as he didn’t ever lie to us for the lore purposes, but now it is most definitely so), Jimmy is as confused as always and as he told on one of his streams he was partially banned from the Empires SMP chat, for sometimes he accidentally leaked the information that was important for the lore (spoilers) and now he sometimes doesn’t know what they are even doing at all, if they forget to tell him and the messages are hidden from him. Who?… What else?… So this is another mystery.

[inaris-mage-of-storms]

" - And he wasn't happy about finding someone else in the temple, but he was so certain that his little map meant he would be able to find the artifact before I could," said Scott to his audience. The regular meeting between rulers had concluded, and while some had already left for their respective empires, a few stayed to socialize. At some point the conversation turned to how some of them had coincidentally first met years before they held any power.

"He didn't know I could see it glowing through the walls," Scott continued. "Gave him quite the surprise when I walked out of the room with the statue in hand just as he got there."

"Gave me quite the surprise when you decked me, too," said Pix. "You laid me out and took off with it."

"Well, I wasn't about to risk you getting hold of it when I'd done all the work," said Scott smugly.

"Most embarrassing excavation of my career," sighed Pix. "Outwitted by a common thief."

"Excuse you," said Scott indignantly. "I'm not common. And what's an archaeologist anyway but a thief who writes things down."

Pix laughed. "I'm not a thief at all," he said. "I'm a collector, as you're so fond of calling it yourself."

"Yes, and 'collecting' is how you learned to pick locks," smirked Scott. "A skill you picked up for only the most noble of endeavors, I'm sure."

"You punched me in the face the first time we met too!" interjected Fwhip. "Am I detecting a pattern?"

"That was your own fault," Scott reminded him. "I so graciously let you stay at my camp and you tried to steal the ores I had on me."

"Such violence hidden behind such a pretty face!" said Sausage, and winked at Scott. "Now I kind of feel left out. I think we just kissed in a pond the first time we met."

"That was definitely not what happened," said Scott.

"Okay maybe not, but we did kiss on day one." Scott rolled his eyes, and Sausage grinned.

"Wait wait wait, I think I know how Scott picks his friends!" laughed Fwhip. "He just plays Kiss or Kill with everyone he meets, and if the answer is 'yes' to at least one of them then he keeps them!"

Scott let out a heavy sigh. "I really want to argue that point, but I think you might be right," he said. "Maybe not from the first meeting, but I've definitely either kissed or punched every single one of my allies at some point."

Oli let out a dramatic gasp. "I've never been struck by your fair hand nor kissed by your sweet lips!" he cried out, clutching his chest with one hand and sweeping the other out to the side. "Are we not friends, Scott? Have my affections for you been one-sided all this time?!"

Scott regarded the bard with a bemused expression. "Oli, what affections? We don't have an official alliance," he said. "And we've barely interacted outside of these meetings."

"Oh yeah, that's true," said Oli sheepishly. "Had a bit of 'fomo' for a second, don't mind me."

"It sounds silly, but Fwhip might actually be on to something," mused Joel. "With the fellas, anyway."

"The girls get a free pass," agreed Scott. "We're automatically friends unless they try to steal my man."

"But you don't have a man to steal," said Lizzie.

"That's twice you've pointed out I'm single. Friendship revoked," said Scott, and Lizzie cackled.

"There's only one ally that doesn't fit," said Sausage. "Unless you've already dumped Jimmy and I just didn't know it."

"No, we still have an alliance," said Scott.

"My theory still works with them anyway," said Fwhip to Sausage. "Scott and Jimmy have definitely - ow."

Scott sipped his drink and acted like he hadn't just kicked Fwhip under the table, but to his displeasure everyone's eyes were already on him. He'd never been more glad for Jimmy's habit of leaving almost as soon as meetings ended instead of sticking around to chat.

"The sheriff is an exception," he said, fixing Fwhip with a stare that he hoped conveyed his silent demand for the goblin's discretion. "Gunpowder and terracotta are valuable resources to have access to. And I feel sorry for him. He's trying his best, but you lot do nothing but give him a hard time despite claiming to be his friends."

"He fired me," said Fwhip. "I'm allowed a bit of a grudge before I forgive him."

"And he's so easy to tease," said Joel. "He's always getting in someone's face at the slightest provocation. He practically begs to be given a hard time!"

"That may be so," said Scott, "but you don't have to take it as far as you do sometimes. Give the poor man a break."

He reached for the last slice of cake, but Fwhip beat him to it and clambered up into the rafters. "Too slow!" he crowed. "Mine now."

"It's cute how you think I can't reach you up there," said Scott. "You have five seconds to give it back before I come after you."

Fwhip smirked, shoved the cake in his mouth, and made a rude gesture. "Come an' get me, circus boy," he said around his mouthful of dessert, and scrambled to the next beam as Scott jumped to his feet amid cheers of fight, fight, fight! from the others.

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[thetomorrowshow]

drunk with stagnant breath - epilogue

First - Previous

and this fic is over! glad to everyone who came along for the ride, ty for all the support <3 it's short lol but that's just how it needed to be :)

cw: mentioned past injuries, mentioned past abuse

~

EPILOGUE: in which everything is fine, but actually, nothing is, and that's okay (aka beach episode!)

“Joel! Come on in!”

Joel shook his head vigorously. “Jim, I had enough of the water when I had to get in to make you bathe, I’m not doing that again.”

Lizzie splashed him. Joel hissed and drew back, shoving his chair further along the bank. “I’m not supposed to swim, anyways. Doctor’s orders.”

Jimmy snorted. “You’ve been out of the sling for two weeks now, it’s fine.”

“I’m still sore, and I don’t want to be in thirty foot deep water when my right side stops working out of nowhere and I start sinking, you noodle!”

Jimmy rolled his eyes, noticed how Joel followed the action then quickly looked away. He rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. He kept forgetting that his eyes were changed.

Sometimes they were fully gold and sometimes they were just gold-rimmed. He assumed that there was some sort of pattern to it, something he hadn’t figured out yet, but even though there wasn’t any difference in his vision with this new change he imagined it would be fairly strange to see every day. It wasn’t even the strangest part of his appearance—the golden tears on his cheeks hadn’t faded, his scars sparkled in the sunlight, the fins on his ears and neck were rimmed with gold. He was changed.

His friends were changed, too. Along with Joel’s injured arm, he had partly paralyzed the right side of his body during the final battle, and while he had regained much of the feeling through the healing of the Overgrowth, he would likely experience the consequences of it for the rest of his life. Katherine flinched at loud noises, looked around for her friends to ensure they were safe. Lizzie cried out in her sleep, stayed up later and later, checking on her kingdom to keep herself out of her bed. Sausage was permanently unsteady from a head injury, fell over every time he took a corner too sharply. Pixl had disappeared shortly after the official surrender of the battle and hadn’t been seen since.

Those not in his alliance were affected as well. fWhip had approached him barely a day after Jimmy was released from medical to apologize profusely, clearly close to tears. He continued to apologize every time they ran into each other, watched Jimmy nervously out of the corner of his eye. Gem limped, leaning heavily on her staff. A nasty scar twisted down Joey’s collarbone, dark and visible with the neckline of his shirts. And Scott. . . .

As soon as Scott had healed, he ran. Unlike Pixl, though, everyone knew where he was. Scott had locked himself in his palace in Rivendell, not letting anyone in and not leaving. Katherine and Gem had spoken to him through the door, had told him that they wanted to see him, explained that they knew it wasn’t his fault. Scott had told them, in carefully measured words, that he didn’t trust himself and didn’t want to hurt them.

Jimmy couldn’t help but feel almost . . . envious. Envious that Scott didn’t want to hurt them, but had been just fine hurting him.

He knew . . . well. He was supposed to know that it wasn’t Scott’s fault. He was supposed to know that Scott hadn’t been in control for the past however-long. He was supposed to know that Scott hadn’t meant to hurt him.

It was just hard to believe. With all his scars and trauma and the like. After all, he had proof of abuse. It wasn’t like all that had just never happened.

He shook himself out of his thoughts. His skin was beginning to crawl, and he didn’t want to risk a panic attack or flashback. So instead of focusing on Scott any longer, he blinked a couple of times and grinned at Joel.

“We’ll save you if you sink, c’mon!”

“I can’t breathe underwater like you lot!” Joel sputtered. “Won’t be much help if you save me after I’m already dead!”

Still, he stood, dusting himself off. He stretched, shook his head, then sat on the ground of the shore, rolling up his pant legs to splash his feet in the water. “This is as far as I’m going. I’ve got a meeting after this, I’m not getting soaked.”

Lizzie flipped over to him, crawled teasing fingers up his legs which quickly became a sturdy grip to yank him into the water with.

Jimmy had a meeting after this too. He had all sorts of meetings all the time—that was one thing he supposed he missed about living in Rivendell—he had no responsibilities. These days, he met every day with a different group. Just yesterday, he’d had a monthly council for his empire, then a meeting Sausage to discuss trades, and after that a meeting with some sort of high elder of the Order of Aeor? Apparently since he was officially Aeor’s champion and prophet, and had a direct link with the god, he had to participate in his religion.

Aeor chuckled in the back of his head. Jimmy rolled his eyes, scratched at the beginnings of his beard as if flicking the god away.

“Fine! I’ll get in the water,” Joel exclaimed, shoving Lizzie off of him. He sighed, then his expression turned sly. “If Jimmy tells us what he did with the crystal.”

Jimmy’s stomach went cold. “I—” he stuttered, completely taken aback. He couldn’t tell anyone where it was—he didn’t want them to get corrupted. He’d already told everyone that he’d gotten rid of it. How much more could they want?

“Joel!” Lizzie smacked his chest, and Joel drew back, offended. “Jimmy, you don’t have to answer that.”

“Right, well I already told you,” Jimmy managed. “I buried it deep in a field. Or—I wasn’t the most in control when that happened, so I guess Aeor did that. Point is, it’s hidden, and it’s nowhere near any of our kingdoms.”

He hesitated, waiting for Aeor to chime in to correct him. Nothing came; Aeor must’ve stopped observing him for the moment.

Lizzie and Joel were both watching him carefully. He nearly snapped at them, nearly told them that he was fine and they needed to stop hovering, but instead he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. They only cared about him and wanted to make sure he was okay. After everything, he could grant them that.

He looked back up and smiled, almost genuinely. “I’m good. Wanna take a walk? Then Joel doesn’t have to swim and we can both get our daily exercise in.”

-

The day whiled away quickly after that. Joel and Lizzie left, and Jimmy attended meetings. By that point he was utterly exhausted, and the effort he put into getting ready for bed took it out of him and he fell asleep before he even had time to pull his covers up.

In his drowsing, blank state, he reached under his pillow, fumbled for a moment, then withdrew a small object looped through a chain, which he held close to his chest as he fell asleep.

And Scott Smajor, fallen elf, sat curled on the floor of a small, wrecked room, head buried in his arms and back against the scratched door. His shoulders shook, his hand clenched around a small object looped through a chain.

Hidden in a locked metal box buried in the chasm between the Cod Empire and Mythland, a gold-encrusted crystal lay cold and still.

[arospecsyourblockdudes]

Lizzie is just about finishing preparing to leave when an incredibly colorful man stomps his way down the stairs.

He clashes quite terribly with the room, see, all blue and shimmery with the water reflecting off the walls and chests (really quite pretty, whoever designed it must’ve been very creative). And this man, well, he was all purples and greens and golds and he was the first person she’d seen in probably a while. So you can imagine she was very startled.

“What happened to you? You’re shorter now.” The man spoke, very loud as well. “Is it because of the ocean draining?”

It took Lizzie a moment to collect her thoughts. The main one was if the man would report her for thievery or not. “I….maybe?” He must be insane, she decided.

“Well, that’s in inconvenient, innit?” He put his hands on his hips and sighed. “Now, one of my towers on the Matral Palace got split in half! Just went and saw it, nothing else is a problem, just that. No idea how it happened. I’m far from the Grimlands, so I don’t even know. Some freak accident maybe. Structural instability.”

Lizzie blinked and stared. What she’s gathered is that he’s got a palace. A royal man has caught her robbing someone. It couldn’t be the king of this place, the towers aren’t split. “Oh no. Well, I’d best be on my way, excuse me.” She hurried past him before turning around to bow. No need to be rude.

“What?” The man laughed. “Why are you being so formal? You’re being weird.”

Lizzie stood up quickly and glanced at the floor. “Well, you’re royalty, so it’s only polite.”

The man laughed again. Was he ever quiet? “You’re royalty too, you know. What’s gotten into you?”

“I am?” Her gaze shot up and she looked around the room. It wasn’t familiar at all, so maybe she wasn’t queen of this place. “You’re joking.”

“I’m….not.” His smile fell and he looked at her with too much worry for them to be strangers. “Are you alright, Lizzie? Is there…is there any doctors around here?”

“I feel fine.” She stood up straighter and took a step back. “How do you know my name? Do you have mind-reading powers? Stop reading my mind!”

“No, it’s…Lizzie, it’s me, Joel.” The man took a step toward her and she took another step back.

“I don’t know anyone named Joel. Or anyone.” It’s hard to look at this Joel. Partly because he’s incredibly colorful. Partly because he looks slightly heartbroken and it’s apparently her fault and she doesn’t even know what’s going on. “Look, I just want to get out of here. I don’t want to cause any trouble.”

“Well…how about you stay at Mezelea, just for a bit?” The man takes two steps toward her and she stays where she is. “That’s my kingdom, in the mesa. You can see it from here. Someone can look at you and see if they can figure out your memories.”

“Well you said your palace collapsed.” Lizzie looks at him skeptically. “I don’t trust the structural integrity of your kingdom.”

Joel rolled his eyes and sighed. “Just the one part of it. Everything else is fine. I just think medical attention is the best option. Please.”

Lizzie considers refusing his help. She doesn’t need to be examined, she’s fine. But something in her hesitates. The man looks very sweet and very sad. There’s obviously been some disaster if the ocean is all drained. There might not be many places for her to go if she leaves. And he’s a king. Could have worse accommodations than that! And there’s something in his eyes.

“Fine.” She decides on. “But only for a little while. Maybe a month or so.”

Joel smiles and pulls her into a hug. Then, just as suddenly, he lets her go. “Sorry about that. But, uh, alright then! Let’s make our way out of here.”

Lizzie followed him out of the basement, listening to him mutter things about finding someone named Jimmy and doing violent things to some guy named Fwhip. It all sort of went over her head.

But he seems nice enough. And she figures that if she was meant to know him, she probably could’ve had worse friends.

[sleepsart]

Pjo au? You combine my two hyperfixations? Anything about Joel and/or Jimmy?

Absolutely.

Jimmy is what started this whole au. He is the reason I made it. I was doing dishes and the pjo musical soundtrack came on and I was thinking about Jimmy and BAM.

So. Jimmy is a son of Poseidon! He was. Okay he was abandoned, not gonna sugar coat it. He and Lizzie were left alone when they were young, and at some point Lizzie caught on to danger following them. And she thought it was her fault, so she made a tough decision and left him alone. He's got abandonment issues.

At some point, he wandered into Deal with Destiny, the game show Lizzie and Scott found him in. He went to it at first as an attempt to make some money for food or something, he didn't actually know what he was thinking. He got stuck as a fish for a month or two before Lizzie and Scott stumbled in, did their thing and all. The un-fish-ify thing Scott did to get Lizzie caught Jimmy too.

Lizzie didn't wanna leave him behind a second time, and now that she knew she was a demigod, she had suspicions about Jimmy, and brought him back. Wahoo, Poseidon kid!!! He's got issues but he forgave Lizzie pretty fast.

JOEL. He's a demeter kid. He likes moss. He won't tell anyone how he got to camp or where he was before camp??? Everyone just woke up one Tuesday and he was there. And he didn't leave??? He didn't leave.

He doesn't like people looking at his eyes. He doesn't like people in general. He's shit at swimming. He hates getting wet. He has jumped into multiple bodies of water before because he keeps forgetting Lizzie and Jimmy can breathe underwater and he gets worried if one of them is down there for longer than like 30 seconds.

He asked Lizzie out, but it was so Normal that she didn't realize. And then she asked him out and he just never told her he already asked her. He was trying to be nice but he's not nice so him being nice was just him sounding like a normal guy. He'd rather die than tell someone he tried very very hard to be nice and it just came out So Incredibly Mundane.

Also Joel sometimes just eats clay.