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#he feels guilty
maybedr3am · 9 months
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Again, something small and silly, some kind of apology it would be?
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Mind didn't let it there ☝️⬆️⬆️⬆️
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littleseasalt · 8 months
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forever's stream crashed and when it came back to me it was in the middle of the talk so I didn't get the full thing yesterday, but now I went back on the vod and the thing he told Tina-
"Even that I wasn't in control, even that it wasn't myself, I was still there you know? And it was being really tough to see how people were treating me. Even that I knew- I knew that like, I knew that I kinda of deserved it. But ah, it- it was really hard to see how people were treating me and I'm so glad that you were one the persons who like, even seeing this side, like how crazy I was, was still being nice to me, so thank you so much Tina."
FOREVEEEEEEEEEEEERRRR
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cannibalovers · 2 months
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"What if we all left together? Like we were supposed to."
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Forgive me for having thoughts about Roy Mustang and his role in the war.
I am not a fan of saying a character "deserves" something, because that is a boring and reductive way to analyze media. Instead I want to move within the story and its narrative/thematic beats as I discuss a character and their interpretation. And as such, I want to talk about Roy.
He's a character I greatly enjoy - and how could I not?
The story of Fullmetal Alchemist wants me to be fascinated by this man, his guilt and his love and his dreams. We're being shown again and again that he would gladly die for his friends, that he cherishes the people around him, that he is weighed down by what he did during the war. We see his love and grief for Hughes, see it almost destroy him. We see his dedication to Riza and Havoc and the people of Amestris. We walk alongside him as he plans to overthrow the Führer and change the country.
And all the while... he's still a war criminal.
I'm saying that not to condemn enjoying his character, but to give him more depth. Because I won't lie - I am somewhat concerned by the amount of takes that "excuse" his actions as just following orders. Now, again, he's a fictional character, who doesn't have to be excused for anything considering the crimes he committed are not real... but the story of Fullmetal Alchemist wants us to view him as a war criminal - and it wants us to step away from the explanation that he was just following orders.
Very poignant in that regard is the scene between Hawkeye and Edward, when she first tells him of their goal - being tried for what they did in Ishval. And Ed wants to excuse it, he's the audience stand-in after all, he is us, wanting our favorite characters to have a better fate by claiming it was Envy, who shot the child, Bradley, who ordered the extermination. But Riza won't let him. Rightfully so. Because while Edward's (our) reaction is very natural, very predictable, her reasoning is the actual stance the show takes.
It doesn't matter if they were just following orders, they were the people committing a genocide.
Some of the translations of the manga and show even call it just that: a genocide.
And while a soldier killing in a war isn't condemned by the narrative, the things the State Alchemists did very much is.
But what should they have done instead? Refuse their orders, get court-martialed and executed? Join the war on the side of the Ishvalens?
Maybe.
I am not saying that Roy's inability to act against his orders is bad writing or inconsistent characterization, I simply think it doesn't "excuse" his actions in the story. And the story doesn't want us to excuse it for him either.
If anything, one of Roy's (and Riza's) biggest regrets is probably the fact that they didn't die at the beginning of the war - there is a reason they are implied to be actively suicidal after the end of the extermination, just as there is a reason why they are no longer striving to die quite this quickly by the time Ed is told the truth.
Dying in the war - dying at the start of the war at their own hands - would potentially have saved thousands. Dying as Father is trying to take control, their goals not yet reached, would only pile two more bodies onto a pile already too big.
Part of their guilt is the harsh truth that their death could have made a difference.
(refusing to partake in a genocide is always the right choice, even at the cost of your own life)
People call Major Armstrong a coward because his refusal to follow orders was only an option for him because of his family name - I think he's being called a coward by his sister because he wasn't strong enough to join the Ishvalen warriors. Yes, Armstrong wasn't court-martialed for his insubordination because of his connections but when he broke down and refused to kill, there was no way for him to know that. I don't think that he knew he would be spared when he clung to that child and begged for mercy - he hoped, perhaps, but he couldn't have known for sure.
And, yes, he is a coward - but not for refusing to kill. His cowardice stems from his inability to join the fight on the side of those he wanted to protect. That's why his character arc culminates in him standing up for his believes, in him refusing to back down, in him fighting for those who need protection.
The manga in particular makes it a lot harder to argue that the threat of death is a good enough reason to follow orders. It makes sense for the common soldier, who truly is just trying to survive, but for weapons of mass destruction? Is it really "right" for someone to stay alive if they know they can kill thousands with a snap of their fingers, knowing they will be forced to do just that?
During the Ishval arc in the manga, this very question is asked but not about Roy and Armstrong and Riza - no, we see its direct parallels in Marcoh, Knox and the Rockbells. Marcoh, who did unspeakable things far away from the actual battlefield, creating the very Philosopher's Stone used to kill the people he murdered to create it, and Knox, who is forced to help in inhumane experiments right next to the battlefield, maybe even employing Mustang in some of the unsavory things he does - the two of them talk about the Rockbells, who chose to help the Ishvalens against direct orders, who know they will probably die, who do the right thing even though they were told not to. And what do Knox and Marcoh see in them? They are envious of them for accepting their death as a potential consequence of doing the right thing.
Because Knox and Marcoh are following orders at the cost of their own soul - and they will never forget the guilt of knowing that they could have made a different choice.
Choice.
That's what it all boils down to. All these characters had a choice in Ishval. Not as humans, since they are fictional characters, but as archetypes and metaphors. Arakawa tells us again and again that there is a choice, always. The choice to be merciful, the choice to be kind, the choice to stand back up again.
Defying orders was a choice they could have made. Maybe at the cost of their own life, but then again: they are at war, they must have known their death to be a possibility from day one.
And this is what informs so much of Roy's character: he made a choice back in Ishval, and he's been paying for it ever since. He followed orders, even though he knew it was wrong. He bought into the military's propaganda until it was too late, and he killed thousands upon thousands because it was easier to follow along than to do what was right.
That's the bane of his guilt, the thing that now forces him to keep on living: following orders is never an excuse, especially not if you're a living weapon and you're willing to pull the trigger.
Roy wants to save his country, and then he wants to face the consequences of his crimes - and then, finally, the knowledge of flame alchemy can be gone.
No one should wield that amount of power, is what the story wants to tell us, because what if the person holding that weapon is ready to just follow orders.
It is utterly human how Roy behaved - and as such, it has the potential to be utterly depraved and cruel.
And he knows that.
As a fictional concept he "deserves" nothing as he is not real, but as a character within a narrative Roy carries every ounce of guilt on his shoulders knowing that this is the price he has to pay for being a soldier. A State Alchemist. The Hero of Ishval.
There is no excuse for what he did, which is what makes his character writing so intriguing.
Nothing ever excuses genocide, and Roy knows that - and that's why he's still alive.
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*breathes in* THE FACT THAT TESSA CAN'T EVEN TALK ABOUT HER KIDS WITH WILL (AKA JAMIE AND LUCIE) BECAUSE IT HURTS SO MUCH IS SINGLEHANDEDLY THE MOST DEPRESSING BIT OF INFO I COULD HAVE RECEIVED THIS MONDAY AFTERNOON THANKS CASSIE *breathes out*
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e-icreator23 · 2 years
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Its fine.. *stands up and brushes myself off*
Know what you can have it anyway..
*throws recorder and walks off*
....[Cory catches the recorder and looks at @alexartink walking away]
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Abby and the FNAF puppet would get along..
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teamhangaround · 6 months
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Obi-wan very much regretting the decisions made tonight.
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skeleslime-phantom · 29 days
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Maybe he'll come around to it? 🤔
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starry-songs-canvas · 5 months
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Not Coming
“Bruce! They’re not coming!”
Bruce Wayne’s newest adoptive son shouts at him with worrying certainty, especially considering the turn this kidnapping incident has turned into. What, with the falling burning plane all around them.
“Superman can hear-“
“No, Bruce. That’s just some stupid marketing ploy the Justice league uses to deter crime.” Danny sighs bitterly, (tiredly, hopelessly) as his shoulders slump slightly.
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konigsblog · 6 days
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Revenge sex!! Popular!reader filming herself with nerd!konig who thinks that she has feelings for him!!
nerd-könig doesn't realise that you're simply just taunting him for your own enjoyment and gratification.
you had been dared by a couple of your closest friends to get with the big, large loner in the corner to see what he's got between his thighs, and you almost felt guilty if it wasn't for the curiosity burning inside of you. it wasn't a surprise that könig was so large and girthy. i mean, you could tell just by looking at him, that deep down he was nothing but a pathetic, perverted loser. könig fixes the rectangular glasses sitting crookedly on his face, his breath reeking of booze and the scent of marijuana sticking to his fair, flushed skin.
könig doesn't deny that he's a virgin. you take full control by pinning him down to straddle his broad waist, attempting to bounce on his achingly large cock with the stretch burning inside of you. his breathing is ridiculously heavy and his eyelids are heavy with exhaustion and delirium, thrilled that a woman has finally shown interest in him, or so he thinks. könig is tired of jerking himself off and getting off to porn magazines and videos all alone in his bedroom. he needs a woman to tend to his sexual needs and desires.
könig is almost a little too eager to lose his virginity, especially to a gorgeous girl like you. it's laughable and humiliating for the poor creep, who can't keep his grimey, dirty hands off of you. you push his large hands down to his side, recording yourself as you ride him and take nearly every inch of his slick and swollen dick. könig pathetically begins to thank you for being so generous, for allowing him to feel a pussy for the first time. it wouldn't be unbelievable if könig never lost his virginity.
he's too open with you, sharing all of his filthiest, darkest secrets with you, oblivious to your untrustworthiness and the fact that you plan to leak these videos and recordings.
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felsicveins · 5 months
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Jumping on the bandwagon where people resurrect Creek to be whatever the fuck they want
AU where he winds up as Velvet and Veneers assistant after talking his way out of being eaten
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tanglepelt · 1 year
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Dc x dp idea 66
Danny and Damian are twins.
Danny does not excel at majority of training. He does excel at stealth. One day he overhears a discussion regarding how there could only be one heir.
He knows he can’t defeat Damian. He also just doesn’t want to. They are by no means close, but it’s still his twin. So right there and then he plots.
Danny fakes his own death. Lighting a fire “accidentally” to “dispose” of his corpse. No risk of the pits bringing him back.
This leads to him in amity park. The Fentons were strange enough to take him in. A son story about how his family wants him dead. Jazz had always wanted a little brother.
Over time Danny realizes just how toxic the league was. Jazz helped a lot. He feels guilty about leaving Damian behind. And for having Damian “kill” him. Sneaking into the league is out of the question so he stews in guilt. Then the accident happens. 5 years later.
So he does go back. Damian isn’t there.
He ends up at a gala with Vlad or sam.
He sees Damian. Danny shoots his shot. Just popping up by him. Apologizing for using him to fake his own death and asking if he managed to realize how bad the league was.
All while dodging Damian’s attacks.
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dendromancer · 7 months
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no because stede is truly humanity's strongest soldier he just had sex with the love of his life, and it was the first positive sexual experience of his life. and then ed tells him that he considers last night a mistake, and you can see how much it hurts him but he understand ed is panicking so he says that they can be whatever they want to be without pressure. and THEN ed says out of the blue that he's leaving to become a fisherman apropos of nothing. and this definitely fucks with him since he believes what ned said about ed liking him only because he's an amateur
anyway if i was stede i would have fallen off that balcony hoping to get head trauma
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ruporas · 6 months
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feast (ID in alt)
#vashwood#vash the stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#trigun#trigun maximum#tw blood#im posting this so late because october escaped me Suddenly.. hello....#i wanted to make it a photoset with this other vampire vw wip but i don't think i'm finishing it any time soon and the mood of it is#completely different anyway. also i don't think i ever shared anything about my vampire au on here !!! it's all old art by now so im shy lo#but maybe i'll do a photodump of it. long story short vash is a vampire since birth and ww is a human vampire hunter that turns during thei#travels together due to EoM experiments + getting vash to drink from him at some point.#humans turn once they get bitten but bc ww has been experimented on#& got bitten by a bunch of human turned vampires thruout his hunts he thought it wouldn't be a problem for vash to drink from him but alas.#theyre both ok though theyre traveling together definitely not hating themselves for what theyve become and feeling guilty for what theyve#done to each other. theyre completely normal about it. the biting part is really appealing to me in vampire aus so i draw it a lot but#in reality vash only drank from ww once and ww mightve done it twice under the realization he might actually die otherwise#since he wont drink from humans after being turned.... he's combatting the 5 stages of grief at all times#if this is all nonsense im sorry DMGKSDF I'M NOT good at explaining and this au came from nowhere in the depths of my mind its a mess#ruporas art
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