#sorry lottie ily really <3

[thatgayb1tchwhosimps4her]

I'm actually so in love w/ these little fuckers, you have no idea (even Ben, which I won't ever be saying again).

[my-castles-crumbling]

CAS,

IT'S ME HI!

IM CARING ANON

IT'S ME. (this was a shitty T Swizzle reference but hey im in a good mood.)

Get urself a snack coz this is gonna be longgg. And also this is the final update.

So last time when i had updated u Lottie had asked me if she could think over my proposition. And this morning she texted me saying that she wants to meet J & I at the local Starbucks before school. I was like ok, and i told J. He was suspicious coz he thought I had told Lottie about his plan (he was correct tho lmao).

So once we met her at Starbucks, Lottie did something i wasn't expecting her to do. She came out to J (and me)!!

This is kind of how it went down:

Lottie: so I have to tell you something very important.

J: what is it?

Lottie: I'm a lesbian.

Me: *choking on my coffee*

J: LMAOO ok.

Me:...

Lottie:...

Me: oh you're serious?

Lottie: yes

J: oh damn

J: *to me* you knew didn't you? that's why u were convincing me it's not a good idea.

Me: *awkward nod*

Lottie: it's not her fault, i had asked her not to.

J: wow ok.

( a very uncomfortable and long pause later)

J: I'm sorry idk how to react , nobody has ever come out to me b4r.

Lottie: it's ok. I just wanted to put it out there, coz this was causing a lot of awkwardness amongst us.

J: awkwardness? did u know that I fancy u?

Me: *very awkward laugh*

Lottie: no, actually i fancied *my name*.

J: WHAT

Lottie: yeah

J: why? there are a lot of other girls who are wayy hotter than her.

Me: *lowkey offended* excuse me?

J: it's true.

Lottie: *laughs*

J: all seriousness though, thank you for telling me. Do you want me to keep it a secret?

Lottie: yes, just for sometime. Till I'm confident enough to tell everyone.

Me: ofc, u need to come out when you're comfortable. There's no deadline. You can trust us.

Lottie: thanks.

After that we talked about some random shit and then we walked to school.

Also Lottie told me that she will be keeping some distance with us not because she doesn't want to be friends anymore but bcoz she needs to get over me.

(p.s- after school i took J to Nando's coz I knew he was sad)

So yeah that's the end of it, and I'm so fucking relieved that it all went well. And a huge part of it goes to you, Cas. Your advice really helped otherwise god knows what would've happened.

SO THANK YOU SO MUCH!! ILY 💕💕💕 YOU'RE LIKE AN AMAZING OLDER SISTER. EVERYONE IN UR LIFE IS SO LUCKY TO HAVE YOU!!!!

With lots of love,

Caring Anon ♥️

Hi!!!

Oh, I’m so glad things went decently! I was a bit worried for J, lol. Also, don’t give me too much credit, you did amazing! You definitely live up to your anon name! I hope you have such a great day!

<3 <3 <3

[dollfacefantasy]

HI KENNY (≧∇≦)/ ILY

okok short thoughts on rick hehe </3 lowkey still rewatching it and i forgot a bit about his character but worth a short

um i’ve never been the best at dialogue but AHH feeling his dirty whispers fanning against your skin would be the *best*…the accent, the raspiness in hushed voice omg i’d be able be able to get off on just his voice alone

also idk if you’re into this but um gun kink with him…i mean he’s always been so skilled with them, right? there’s no chance in him getting you hurt. him getting one all nice and clean and then rubbing you down there over your panties until you’re completely soaked and bucking your hips up and he’s just grinning teasing you for getting so turned on over something like that IDK MAYBE VERY OOC BUT I WANT

hi lottie ily!! 🩷🩷

also ummmm this ask is perfect like wtf. i’m so into that like… first ur so right cause his voice would be so good like all whispered and teasing um cause just like his accent and it’s all raspy 😖 and rick in my mind, at a certain point in the show, he doesn’t give a FUCK. like he can be MEAN when teasing. like cocky as fuck. especially if there’s like an age gap and you’re in your early twenties thirsting after a man like him who’s older, who’s been married. tsk tsk tsk. i knowwww he’d love doing that shit while you’re on his lap. acting like he’s just giving you a few innocent kisses when he’s really talking all about how much he’d rather be bouncing you on his cock right then.

and then the gun thing. BITING MY FIST RN. like imagining humping the handle (idk anything about guns so sorry if that’s the wrong word lol). but like rubbing that all over your panties especially if they’re super cutesy and pink and stuff :( he’d mock the fuck out of you but make sure it’s hitting your clit just right. maybe at the end he stops moving it and makes you do all the work yourself. and then obviously you have to lick it clean afterwards cause you can’t just be leaving his things a mess :(

[cdyssey]

Yellowjackets 2.07 Reactions

CW: Baby Death Discussion/Grief; Suicide Mentions/Attempts; Cannibalism; Cancer

I couldn’t make it thirty effing seconds into this episode without tearing up at these girls staring awake into the darkness, all shattered with grief. Taissa’s right next to Shauna. Of course she is. And Lottie’s right there too.

Oh, my God. She’s still holding the baby.

Her absolute silence. The way she refuses water. Her shrugging off every attempt that Tai makes to comfort her. My heart fucking aches for her.

And she has to bury that wrenchingly small bundle under rocks because the ground isn’t thawed enough for a proper burial. I wanna note here that it was so respectful of the show not to show the baby’s body. We didn’t have to see it to know how tiny and tragic that it was.

“It’s you and me against the whole world.” Goddammit. Because she died with the baby. Literally.

Oh??? A very muted version of the title song?

“I’m sorry, have you two joined a cult since we last saw you, or… / “We are an intentional community. / “What is the intention exactly?” KQQMKQOQJEDIDJSJDJ.

The fucking euphoria I feel at seeing all six adults together.

Nat admitting to the suicide attempt. Shauna’s horrified, “Oh, my God.” Taissa’s broken expression. They love her.

Tai, crying: “I really thought he was going to make it.” I’m so fucked up about these girls.

“But even if the baby made it… for a while… it wouldn’t change the fact that his mother is starving. We all are. I just think it’s time we woke up.” Heartbreaking and so correct. Heartbreaking because its correct.

“That doesn’t sound like you.” And it doesn’t. Van has always been a believer between her and Tai, and even in the group as a whole, but now she’s lost that faith.

“You helped me hear… see… sleep… and I would be dead without you. I need you, Van.” I’m so fucked up. Like, not even five minutes into this episode, I have teared up multiple times.

Natalie being all in for her girlfriend’s wellness remedies AMDMFJSNSNSN.

“All my rational instincts are just kind of, uh, screaming.” SNDNWND. Babygirl chooses self-care. <3 She needs it. She’s been doing hard work this season threatening to skin people and covering up murders.

BABY GOAT!!!

SHAUNA JUST IMMEDIATELY CONVINCED SHE HAS TO SACRIFICE THE GOAT. HELP ME

Bruce, the goat, ily. And it has not escaped my notice that the goat is a boy, and he’s brown, the same color as that horribly small bundle.

Ben is goddamn losing it. The hallucination of Paul is voicing Ben’s greatest insecurity—that he no longer has a place in the cabin. “It’s just time. We all love you, Ben.”

“Um, I would hate for my bladder to guide me into peeing in that thing.” NADIFNSNDNS. Misty’s reluctance to engage with therapies is notable.

LMAO @ HER SNEAKING AWAY. She said, “Nope. Ur not making me confront my deepest traumas today, bestie.”

Misty overhears the girls praising her, and it’s an echo of that moment before she smashes the black box.

MARI ACCUSING HER OF KILLING CRYSTAL. GIRL, MISTY IS GONNA MAKE SURE YOU’RE PITTED.

Misty putting on a performance about looking for “Crystal,” and here’s another parallel—some of Kristen’s last words to Misty were denigrating her for being a bad actor.

“It gave us what we wanted. Shauna lived.” And Lottie’s right here. When Mari prayed to the wilderness last week, she prayed for Shauna alone.

The shot of the girls and Travis holding hands is reminiscent of a team huddle up. 😭

HELP ME WKDNDNDNSND. The girls are, like, well, if she is dead, that, uh, doesn’t entirely suck for us. <3 (I’m sorry. I don’t know which one is Gen and which one is Melissa yet.)

But on a more serious note, this is an interesting beat because it shows that cannibalism in the cabin is not just a “trance-like survival tactic” anymore. It’s something that can be indirectly alluded to when everyone is fully aware of themselves. (We got an inkling of this earlier when Misty and Kristen were discussing Jackie bone broth.)

All that fucking blood. Shauna’s blood.

This Lottie and Tai conversation is so fascinating to me. They’re the two individuals who have had the most interaction with the supernatural—which makes them peers—but the ways they approach their abilities are drastically different. Embrace versus repression. And it’s something we see in their adult selves too.

Adult Tai actually going to Lottie for help about her sleepwalking.

“I need help.” Taissa Turner admitting this is so huge.

“She just doesn’t want to be suppressed. She’s still a part of you, Tai. She will always be a part of you.” Hhhhhhhhhghhhhhhhhhh.

Shauna nearly on the verge of crying in the woods, disassociating and lost.

SHE LOST HER GOAT.

SHAUNAMISTY RISE!!!!

Misty hoarding food is such a good detail. It makes sense after the woods.

“Why did I give one single shit about this goat when Lottie’s goons are just gonna make me kill him?” 😭 MY POOR LITTLE MEOW MEOW IS SO CONVINCED THAT SHE HAS TO KILL THIS GOAT.

have you guys clocked that I’m insane about shauna yet

“Hey, newsflash. I am the only person who took your killing with the seriousness that it required.” YEAH, TELL HER, MISTY!! AND SHE DIDN’T EVEN LISTEN TO YOUR COOKIE ADVICE QOWKDJDNS

“Well, you’re not that innocent either.” / “I know that, Misty. Do you think I don’t know that?” Shauna utterly hates herself, but listen, yeah? They all fucking do. Each and every one of the Yellowjackets.

Shauna is mothering this goat.

“If you think I’m gonna carry you all day, you are delusional, as well as dumb.” ANWKQNDNESN, Melanie Lynskey, I fucking love you.

“I’m not gonna let them eat you, Kristen.” OH, I FUCKING LOVE THIS. YEAH. Sure, Misty may have 100% caused her death, lmao, but she’ll be damned if she lets Kristen be eaten. And I love that she calls Kristen by her real name too, keeping that knowledge alive, even within herself.

The contrast between Shauna/Jackie and Misty/Kristen is big here. Shauna desperately needing to consume Jackie and granting the others the permission to do so too vs. Misty actually kinda being normal for once about what is owed to a body.

Shauna is back in the Jackie shed, and she’s staring at the corner where her body used to be. OH, GOD. SHE’S CALLING OUT FOR JACKIE.

“Jackie, I really need you right now. Please?” SHE’S SO ALONE, AND LOSING THAT BABY IS TIED UP WITH LOSING JACKIE, AND I’M FUCKING UPSET. Those sobs are guttural.

And Jackie won’t come back and haunt her when Shauna calls. Goddamn.

“The kid’s care is entwined with your own.” That’s such a triggering phrase for Shauna and you can see it in her eyes.

“Because it is one thing if I stab this goat later, but there’s no fucking way that it’s dying while I’m supposed to be watching it. So someone is going to make sure this goat is okay. Right now.” She couldn’t save her baby in the woods, but goddamn, she can save this goat.

The tears in Shauna’s eyes as she talks to Lottie. This is all about motherhood to her. This entire season, from the past to the present, has been.

“I’m not gonna kill this fucking goat, okay? Fuck you!” EKWMDNEND

“Wait. Really? I really don’t?” The fucking break in her voice, all the spiraling cracks. Melanie Lynskey is making me cry over a GOAT.

“Oh, Bruce.” AND SHE SOBS.

“I find it gives a person clarity to have to care for something so innocent.” God, God, God, and Lottie knows the significance of that to Shauna specifically.

“I’m not crying about the goat. I don’t really know, um, what’s happening right now. Um, I think it’s just that I’ve always kept my daughter, you know, Callie, like, at arm’s length. I think just out of fear that she would… die, I guess. Or maybe that she was never even real to begin with. I don’t know. I try to tell myself it’s okay. That I’m safe to… to think of her as-as mine, you know, and to just be her mom. But I think something is broken, Lottie. I just can’t do it.”

I’m so fucking unwell about this. I think I’m gonna do a fuller write-up on this moment later, so for now, God, Melanie Fucking Lynskey. And also, that she has this breakdown to Lottie is powerful. In the past, she’s hated Lottie, hated her for trying to encroach on her baby, hated her for becoming their shaman, but here, she confides in her with this terrible pain about motherhood that she’s been keeping inside.

Ahhhh, just a little bit of self-promotion here, but in my Shauna + Callie fic, I was thinking a lot about Shauna’s relationship with motherhood: “But goodness has never come naturally to Shauna, and motherhood is a gaping wound that won’t ever stop bleeding. (A placenta on the dirty floor. So much red, streaming out of her, simply pouring. Don’t you hear him cry? Why can’t you hear him?)” And I think the crux of that, which holds true in this scene, is the fundamental idea that motherhood continually hurts Shauna, and it always goes back to those woods.

CALIGULA AWNIQOWJWKWKWIDJWJDJS.

“OF ANY MOTHERFUCKER WHO GETS IN YOUR WAY.”

THIS IS FUCKING SUBLIME.

GOD, THIS IS WKWKEJWNSJEJKEJD. HELP ME????

“Caligula, when people look at me, do they just see someone desperate for love? Just some murderer?” GOD, THESE TWO QUESTIONS PAIRED NEXT TO EACH OTHER. Desperate love and murder being synonymous with each other.

“How many times did you get the ball over the goal line? Take it from a bird named after a Roman emperor who was also unjustly accused of heinous acts.” SOBBING WKWKKSNWOQOWIEJD

“You are not a murderer, Misty!” HELP ME WOWKWKWKDJWIIEKDJSNSJDJDJD

MISTY’S SUBCONSCIOUS IS REALLY LIKE, “Haha, bestie. You’re soooooo well!! There’s nothing wrong with you at all!!”

Elijah Wood is having the time of his goddamn life aawkdjdjdnwj.

That was so fucking funny. I have no words.

MISTY, THIS VOICEMAIL DKWNDNEN. IT CAN BE TAKEN AS A MURDER CONFESSION.

The human manifestation of her bird named after a Roman emperor was so right. She. Is. Perfectly. Okay. <3

Misty can’t find Kristen’s fucking body. Hhhhh. It isn’t at the bottom of shit cliff anymore. 😭

God. Ben.

He’s been so isolated all season; he feels like that this is his way out.

“Could you just push me off?” So fucking fucked up, but it tracks with what has been going on in his psyche, as well as in the flashbacks with Paul. Ben’s defined by his emotional paralysis and fear. So he’s not acted and just accepted the consequences that come from that. And this is another way of doing that. If he jumps, that’s making an active decision, and that’s fundamentally not what this man does. But if Misty pushes him, it’s just another action that he’s the recipient of and not the doer.

“… if you kill yourself right now, we will eat you.” Jesus fucking Christ. She states it as a fact. It is a fact. The cabin has reached this point.

MISTY TRYING TO FUCKING BLACKMAIL HIM TO KEEP HIM ALIVE. GOD GOD GOD GOD GOD

“I tried so hard to keep the baby alive. I really did.” I’M SO FUCKING UPSET. THE SAME CLIFF WHERE KRISTEN DIED.

Oh, thank GOD, he stepped back. I could not handle losing Coach Ben today.

Tai taking off her wedding ring. Girl ANJQNDNQNWNDNWNSNWNW, you’re such a fail wife.

“I just can’t believe I’m back here again.” / “Making offerings to the dirt.” Man, the wedding ring as an offering.

TAIVAN KISS YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

But then they both pull back, Tai apologizing profusely.

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO.

NO

FUCK OFF SHOW NO

NO

NOT MY VAN

NOT MY FUCKING CONSUMMATE SURVIVOR, WHO LIVED THROUGH A PLANE BURNING AND A WOLF ATTACK AND THE WILDERNESS.

NO

I have actual goddamn tears running down my face again. What the fuck is wrong with this show

“Van, what are you telling me?” Van has told her every which way but directly. Taissa can’t accept it unless she hears it.

“I have… months.” I’m sick actually. I’m so sick.

“Jesus fucking Christ, Van. You’re just deciding to tell me now?” Taissa’s first reaction is anger. She lashes out, so goddamn terrified.

And between this and her breaking down to Van a few episodes ago, this is the most emotionally invested we’ve seen Taissa. Her life with Simone and Sammy aren’t real to her—as she’d explained to Shauna last season.

But this is real to her.

Van is real to her.

“This is what it wants—us to be together.” Yeah, me too, Lottie.

“We hurt each other. People died.” God, God, God. They hurt each other. They loved each other. They ate each other. They loved each other.

THE FUCKING ANTLER QUEEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY.

“Does a hunt that has no violence feed anyone?” OH MY FUCKING GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD??????

OH THE THERAPIST ISN’T FUCKING REAL

OH MY GOD

DOES A HUNT THAT HAS NO VIOLENCE FEED ANYONE???????

Van tapping Misty with the bottle. Misty’s being included in the girl circle 😭

TNENFNEND, Shauna taking a huge, ‘ole swig and Taissa smirking at her.

“From Van.” / “Oh, you narc.” AKKQWKJERN

Oh, God. The women are being utterly careless with Nat. Shauna telling her that they should just hang out. Van offering the bottle.

“I lost my goat, but I found him again.” MAQMQKKWKQJEJRNRNEJEJFIEEFEIE

FLORENCE FLORENCE FLORENCW

“I think you should all go home.” Lottie has realized that it’s dangerous that they’re together again.

And the women are like FUCK YOU!! WE BELONG TOGETHER. I LOVE THESE WOMEN

Every time I look at Van now, I wanna cry.

“I think it might be time for you to stop resisting.” This line just made it into 20 new fanfics. <33

LOOK AT MY FAIL WOMEN BEING HAPPY. I KNOW IT’S NOT GONNA END WELL, BUT THEY ALL LOVE EACH OTHER SM. THEY’RE HOME.

THIS FLORENCE SONG.

THEY’RE FREE.

LOTTIENAT GODDAMN CHEEK KISS.

Now they’re having girl talk. 😭

“Does he know?” AAaWjejfuwjjwsj

“He doesn’t have a job, job. He’s dedicated to his passionate pursuit of knowledge.” / “Nice, so where does he go to prison?” ANqKQKWIWWOWJDJS. Van and Tai making little asshole asides is so good, lmao. They do that in the cabin too.

“Well, he wasn’t goth when we fucked.” HELP MEEEEEEEEE. HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

“Was she watching some parts?” WKNWWNQKMWDNWJNEND

I could watch 60 minutes of these women talking like this, lovingly taking the piss out of each other and ignoring all their extensive trauma. <3

Most of the women don’t want to revisit the woods. It’s too hard of a wound for them.

… all of the girls having hazy memories. They know they’ve fucked up; it’s harrowing that they don’t remember the specifics of how.

“Well, if I’m, um repressing things I don’t know about, I am very okay with never figuring it out.” Jesus fucking Christ, that delivery was so sad.

“I mean, compulsive behavior, addiction, disease.” And Van stands up and walks away. She’s more than familiar with what Lottie is saying.

LOTTIE CALLING NAT MADAMMMMMM!!!!!

“Lightning crashes, a new mother cries…” GOD, WHAT A LINE.

VANSHAUNA DANCING!!!

SHAUNA IS FUCKING WEARING JACKIE’S BUTTERFLY SHIRT. I’M SICK. THAT IS SO SICK.

SHAUNA THROWING A PUNCH.

THE GIRLS EXCITED AT SNOW.

“YOU KILLED MY FUCKING BABY.” / GOD GOD GOD.

AND IT’S LIKE, YOU HAVE TO PAIR THAT WITH MISTY’S BREAKDOWN WITH BEN. SHE TRIED EVERYTHING TO SAVE THAT BABY.

“You all fucking ate my baby!” / Shauna can no longer discern reality from a dream. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK.

LOTTIE STEPPING IN.

LETTING HERSELF BE THE MARTYR.

THE WOMEN HOWLING. THEY’RE PRIMAL. THEY’RE A PACK. THEY’RE WILD. THEY’RE TOGETHER.

“Travis, take Javi to the bedroom.” 😭😭😭😭😭

LETTING HERSELF BE THE WILLING MARTYR.

“Shauna, we need you. Let it out.” MY FUCKING GOD

IT GOES BACK TO THE STEEL MAGNOLIA MONOLOGUE. SHAUNA WANTS TO MAKE SOMEONE FEEL AS BAD AS SHE DOES.

ALL THE GIRLS JUST FUCKING STANDING THERE AND LETTING IT HAPPEN. THEY WON’T INTERFERE. THIS IS RITUAL VIOLENCE.

THE CUTS BETWEEN THE WOMEN BEING SO HAPPY AND THIS SCENE.

LOTTIENAT HOMOEROTIC DANCING.

LOTTIESHAUNA DANCING TOGETHER IN THE PRESENT, AND SHAUNA JUST FUCKING KILLING HER IN THE PAST!!!

LOTTIE IS BARELY RECOGNIZABLE

LOTTIE SHAUNA ADULT HUG. I CAN’T I CAN’T I CAN’T

“Is Callie okay?” Shauna’s immediate goddamn fear when she hears urgent is that her daughter is hurt.

THE FUCKING TORSO.

GODDAMN IT. YES THE TORSO WAS IMPORTANT

MORE FLORENCE YEAH!!

THAT PROMO. WHAT THE FUCK

MARI BACKING AWAY IN FEAR?????