#spending the rest of eternity with people who talk shit about business majors

[madametrashbin]

Wishful Dreaming

In which I pretend Part 3 of Inazuma’s story doesn’t exist and everyone is alive before shit goes down. Yes, people who read this, it’s time for best friend headcanons/drabbles/whatever the hell this is with Teppei. Honestly, it’s just no thoughts head empty right now and I might have gone off tangent a lot.

(And by a lot, I mean the majority of this piece, probably... by the way, credits to @streimiv and @myuni-moon for making my brain be hyper focused on Self Aware Cult Genshin... I can’t get it out of my head as of right now.)

Enjoy, even if it’s never going to be beta-read by anyone and I will never go back to edit this even if I find mistakes in this later on... and I also don’t know where my brain went for this, but what’s done is done. 

I’m not even sure if I did his personality correctly, ahaha...  (；^ω^)

(I’m going to project my denial in this, so please know it might be wince inducing and incredibly self-indulgent.)

The sun is bright at this time of day, the gentle breeze flowing through the tranquil lands of Inazuma, leaving those who are experiencing the nice morning in a blissful escape from its current reality. 

...much like a young foreigner who had left their current abode, leaving behind a note for their caretakers to see as they wander around the land of Eternity for some true fresh air and peace of mind away from the group that had more or less made their life a little too suffocating as of late.

It is also incredibly lonely in there, as they come to understand that no one (for the most part) look at them like they were a regular human... like they were them.

So they now wander, taking in the rarity of solitude that does not come as easily as one might think. Inazuma is beautiful, even if they know that the peace they see around these parts are but a veil that shields the horrible reality going on around them.

(They know what was happening outside the city, outside the teapot they were living in since they were brought here. They’ve experienced it happening before, many times in fact. They know what will happen, and they’re determined to change it. They just need to find a certain someone, and then they’re set.)

Meeting Teppei was something you didn’t really expect all that much, considering you knew he should be still a part of the logistic division of the Resistance Army and would be busy in their current base that was all the way to Yashiori Island.

Yet by sheer luck, or by fate, you meet the good fellow on Narukami Island and had managed to make a pretty good friendship with him over the course of coincidental meetings.

You’ve come to learn a few things about the young man, and it was that he was a pretty trusting guy, didn’t even think twice of being friends with you... which was a little worrisome, considering what happened in the actual storyline.

That’s okay though, you’ll make nothing happens to him... he is one of your only true friends in this world, after all.

“Teppei.”

They call to him as the Resistance Samurai turned his head away from the sight of the Tenshukaku to them.

“Is there anything you wish for? I mean, if you could have one wish granted, anything you want, what would it be?”

The young man looked rather confused at them, before they briefly clarified that they were just curious. As much as they enjoy the peacefulness of silence, they wanted to know what he really wanted... wondering if he really wanted a Vision, for the acknowledgement of the Gods.

“What would I wish for...”

The young man was quiet for a while, no doubt mulling it over before smiling when he comes to an answer, his head lifting to look at the glimmering stars.

“I would wish for the war to end... for the Sakoku Decree and Vision Hunt Decree to be abolished so people won’t have to suffer anymore.”

“Really? Not a Vision, or something like that?”

“Well, having a Vision would be nice, but thinking about it... I think it’s better if everyone is happy. A lot of people are suffering, and even if I did get a Vision, it’s still pretty difficult to win the war against the Shogunate.”

They could only hum quietly in understanding after that, not really certain what else to ask him before he gives them the same question. 

What do they wish for?

To go home. They would have said, but they chose not to because they knew there was probably little chance for them to be allowed to go home... Their “acolytes” are rather over-protective and notably possessive towards them, probably rampaging around Inazuma right now in search of them.

Well, they at least know what they’re going to do once they inevitably find them.

“Isn’t it time you should head back to your camp, Teppei?”

“Huh? Oh, right! It’s getting late! Then, if I have time, I’ll see you again!”

And he’s off in a rush, disappearing when he turned around the rocky walls and out of their sight. At the same time as he left, the bushes behind them rustle, and a frantic Zhongli appears with Venti following behind... both relaxed significantly once they saw them in perfect condition.

“We’ve been looking everywhere for you, Your Grace. It’s dangerous for you to go outside on your own like that.”

“Please don’t worry us like that again.”

They immediately take to their sides, quickly ushering them to head back to the Teapot before they stopped them in their tracks. 

“Your Grace?”

“I need to do something. Will the both of you accompany me for this?”

...and by the following morning, an official announcement is made to all of Inazuma with the abolishment of both the Sakoku Decree and Vision Hunt Decree. 

Teppei is rushing over to them with a beaming smile on his face when they meet again that noon, the young man happily shares the good news with them while they simply smiled and nodded along with what he said even if they knew the reason behind it.

They don’t tell him anything, nor mention that it was thanks to him that it ended... well, what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.

Extra, because why not:

It becomes a frequent part of your days now that the War in Inazuma was over. Hanging out with Teppei as often as you could, granted you’d have a few people trailing in the shadows at all times, watching over you so you don’t pull the same stunt again.

You have to spend a bit of time giving warning glares behind you whenever Teppei mentions the cold chills that makes his bones shiver despite the relatively warm weather. 

When the two of you get roped up into a bit of trouble (whether by lingering Fatui grunts, stray Ronins or local Treasure Hoarders seeking to rob you), Teppei would always jump in between you and them, saying he’ll protect you as he holds his spear (that he brings with him out of habit).

...you thinks it’s endearing with how he’s trying to be brave, as you can see his hands shake just a tad bit due to the numbers.

But as much as you want to let him have his moment, you prefer that your friend doesn’t get himself hurt and therefore skillfully lead him away from the danger while the rest (your cult) dealt with them.

When you feel like the divine treatment is starting to get too overwhelming, and you’re feeling a little too lonely, you always make your way to Teppei who is there to provide comfort even if you never really talked about what’s troubling you.

Your friendship with Teppei is strong, even if you rarely talk about yourself to him and how he’s told you practically everything about himself.

There’s just something about that trust that bring you a lot of comfort... it gave a different feeling compared to Zhongli or Fischl’s kind of trust... it was warmer, and felt more like home.

You’re also very adamant in keeping him away from the whole cult business, not wanting him to think of you like how the others did... you don’t want to lose that friendship that practically kept you sane in this world.

The amount of times you have to keep reminding your cult to leave him be is absurd, and as much as they protest about him, the fact you’re upset at them for that is enough to get them to stop.

...for a while, at least. They go at it again for a while when Teppei does something they don’t like until you actually snapped at them. They stopped bothering him after that.

If Teppei does eventually find out about the cult, which will most likely happen because of Kokomi, you would be genuinely terrified in the beginning of it until he gives you proper reassurance that it doesn’t change anything.

Now he’s allowed to see you in the Teapot, often visiting with curious snacks he finds and occasionally sleeping over when you are feeling particularly lonely.

Overall, a very pleasant friendship to have. Being one of the few you can really be open with and not be concerned about how you’re viewed as.

Wholesome boy will always have your back whenever you need him... even if he is a little intimidated by the Raiden Shogun and the other intimidating acolytes that are a part of your cult.

[sugar-petals]

:: BTS As Your Vampire Boyfriends

warnings ⚠️ smut, blood mentions, fangs kink

♡ Includes places they gravitate towards and countries they lived in, with their current residence in italics. Imagined in a world where a vampire bite will not convert a human, but rather, where species coexist without interference.

↳ NOTE › fuck yeah, bangtan vamps! some bits are juicier, some fluffier, some funny, some heart-wrenching or romantic. you’re in for a surprise 🤓 enjoy!

⌈ Jimin ⌋ ➝ Urban Vampire. 20 years old. USA, Italy, Sweden. Dresses like your typical haute couture vanguard, complete with bow ties and fishnets. Always has the latest pop culture news from SNS to chat about. Majors in? You guessed it, fashion design. Frequents high-rise apartments of his talkative New Yorker friends, wears huge square shades to fend off sunlight whenever he can. But also just because. The new boutique around the corner? Jimin was the first one to buy that 307$ gleaming Versace choker when it opened. In gold. He might have gotten the $520 guilty pleasure loafers as well. Yes, he does own more shoes than you do. 90 pairs to be exact, it needs a separate closet. He will try on several a night even when you don’t go out and just kiss watching a movie. What on earth is the reason behind all that? It’s to look good for your human eyes only. After all, he can’t see himself in the mirror. If he’s bound to outlive you by fate, he says, at least you’ll get to see him at his very best for the time being. He condenses several of his future lives into the limited one with you. A dazzling outfit can be that diversion and solace. Changing it often makes him feel like living faster, even if he’s headed for immortality. You decided to get a couple wrist tattoo on that last September. Carpe Diem, seize the day.

So there’s a lot to do together. Bucket list after bucket list. But there’s still a routine. Jimin loves destroying his friends at Friday night bowling yet can’t help but let you win every time. No matter how much you provoke him, the guy will aim at the gutters. You actually met at bowling back then. Eleven months ago, at your bff’s b-day party where he was introduced to you as Park, inofficial Prince of Manhattan with a love for sweet blood, orgies, and fiery ladies. The orgies part turned out to be a rumor, but he does say you have sweet blood. Even if it’s bad etiquette among vampires and he knows how much of a vice it is, Jimin loves to subtly show off in front of werewolves and witchers with popular ig accounts about how affluent his vampire family is at underground runway shows. Or sometimes, even fancy dinners where he orders dish after dish for the two of you. His friends suspect it’s all to compensate for how small his canines are since Jimin dearly wishes they were pointier. You’ve assured him that it’s not just better for your neck but also oral sex in general. He’s devilishly good at that. A born lover. Small canines are cute and fashionable anyways, all other talk is bogus. Having a vampire boyfriend remains a special feat and wild ride. But it’s definitely worth it.

⌈ Yoongi ⌋ ➝ Metro Vampire. 27 years old. Japan, Nigeria, South Korea. Dressed in all black, hoodies and stretchy jeans galore. Studied dental sciences in Lagos and has quite some polished teeth himself, but hardly puts them to use nowadays because he’s been getting more Zen about it. Instead, he can’t live without the internet. It distracts him from any urges and thinking about the future, and teaches his inquisitive mind about everything he needs to know about navigating the wide human world beyond the subway. He travels from station to station in Sapporo with a ticket for eternity and the security of less sunlight, always in search for the best Wi-Fi to text you. Even after two years of dating, Yoongi is still fangs over heels in love. And, needless to say, fascinated by the antics of humankind. When you are preoccupied with work at a restaurant in the afternoon, he jobs as a casual broker with contacts to the griffin elites that run the financial market of mystical creatures. 

He frequently jokes that metro vampires are in fact metrosexual. Sometimes visits casinos to kill some time and watch people out of curiosity. His magical ability has caused several power downs in nearby flat complexes — strangely, never the one he is in — but its purpose and origin remain unknown. He’s consulted a supposedly wise street demon about it once but only got a long burp as an answer. Rude. So he travels on and on with the tube. He’s not as much on the go as it always seems, however. Yoongi spends a lot of his time gaming and lounging in your basement. Pretty much naked even if you don’t have sweaty sex at 3 AM. Although, when is it not 3 AM. You’ve developed a little late-night routine there. You bring him coffee, chat, make out, he buzzes you off with your favorite vibrator, you give him slow blowjobs that he records on his phone with shaky hands. Sometimes, with rimming involved, and more action later that night. Yoongi needs to eat pussy to stay on track, otherwise, he falls apart. He’s longing to kiss your breasts all the time and you hold hands when it gets steamy. No biting, he controls himself since he took too much one time. Because he hates planes, Yoongi once crossed the Atlantic in a cargo ship’s high cube not having blood for weeks. After compelling him to suck your whole body off cause dammit I’ve missed your lips, too, vamp guy, you were iron deficient for a month. Yoongi, forever apologetic, has made it a habit to buy you vitamin juice ever since, and orders his blood online.

⌈ Jungkook ⌋ ➝ Forest Vampire. 261 years old. Canada, Bolivia, Ukraine. Dressed in a large flaxen coat and heavy boots. Owns a distant log cabin between scenic, dense firs in the Rocky Mountains. Where most of his day is all about chopping and stacking firewood to take his laser focus off blood cravings and not so random boners. He daydreams of you moaning in just about every hot position possible. Sometimes pleasuring yourself or grinding on his cock. And your fucking scent. It’s what really makes him hard. And tremendously flustered. He could be 261 million years old, it would still catch him off guard to suddenly remember the smell of your sweat and hair. The first time experiencing it, Jungkook shortly blacked out and salivated on the ground for 15 minutes. Human pheromones are just about every forest vampire’s favorite addiction. Out of all BTS members, he is the most sensitive to light or artificial noise and instinct-reliant, so he tries to be cautious. Regardless, always hoping that you fill his mind with your red-hot image. This guy is so whipped — at this point, he can sell a portion of the wood he chops daily and still heat the oven for weeks with the rest.

Nature has everything he desires. Silence, vastness. It’s peaceful. A lot of animals roam the area. It calms his fantasies to some degree. He’s spent many decades in the Amazon rainforest, it’s no surprise. He likes to watch deer and talks to the occasional satyr past midnight. Doesn’t own a lot of money, but knows how to prepare a hearty meal for you when you visit him. That’s what makes JK feel like a million dollars. And once the plate is empty: Time for carnal sex. He can fuck for two hours, one even on a bad day. When he drinks from you, the sheer neck stimulation through sucks alone can make you approach orgasm. With a little help from his fingers on your clit, boy is he gonna blow your mind. This shit will teleport you into alien dimensions. He won’t aim for anything less. Whatever his saliva does, it infuses you with serotonin for two, three days after, and your friends back home know with one glance: Cabin guy did it again. You’ll both be lightheaded and covered in hickeys by the end of your encounters if the weather is particularly indoorsy and you don’t go fishing. He wishes he’d never have to come to a city because of the bustling streets and lack of forest fairies that soothe his mind. But sometimes, buying new clothes is due. You go to a comparatively manageable shopping mall after rush hour where you can’t keep your hands off each other in the dressing rooms. Life with JK won’t ever bore you, that’s guaranteed. The cherry on top: He wields an unregistered type of magic that can manipulate all kinds of water streams — he’s created a little creak beside his cabin and named it after you.  

⌈ Seokjin ⌋ ➝ Cottage Vampire. 311 years old. Switzerland, Morocco, and Mongolia. Dresses all cozy with big sweaters and trench coats. Jin sells self-grown fruit and vegetables at the market downtown on Saturdays and Sundays. With vivid gestures and plenty of small talk topics up his sleeve, he befriends just about any stranger with two minutes spare time to talk about cheese, chocolate, and the notoriously high prices. Jin is among the most popular stall owners because of the many discounts he grants literally anybody. The Swiss way of very neat, organized, and especially neutral living appeals to Jin who has seen far too many messy wars go down since he was turned into a vampire. You didn’t believe it at first: By a British royal named Hamish back in 1708, inheriting him a magical ability to learn languages particularly fast so his Swiss German is perfected to a T. Jin is an utmost textbook rural sweetheart of the village. He takes care of the cottage with you like clockwork. Watering the herbs, painting walls here and there, cleaning the kitchen, always saying hi to the neighbors. Drinking tea on the terrace, with some cheesecake and cream on the fork, watching the cornfields sway in the wind is the good life. Simple, but meaningful.

There are a lot of lively and busy little blackbirds around the house joining you to pick up some crumbs, and Jin turns on the radio to play old-fashioned folk music of whatever Alp orchestra was recorded thirty years ago. The cake is gone all too soon, and the sun sets. You’re happy. Jin is a loyal and moral vampire who has adopted a vegetarian diet ten years ago and didn’t look back once. No cheating! Even if the market sells a lot of tasty ham and sausages. He’s sworn off that. After 311 years, even vampires start to think about their diet. A lot of fellow vamps in the area think he’s one strange guy, but Jin won’t bother. He gets all of his blood from a nearby hospital for a hefty price because he doesn’t want to drink from you all the time no matter how much you ask him. Sex is a better pastime. Chocolate lover Kim got a big dick and decades worth of time developing how to use it. Jin, when he does nibble at you, also has a very pleasant bite that doesn’t leave marks or just about any kind of bruise. He doesn’t want to tell you his secret because apparently, an old and rather nit-picky basilisk told him. Somewhere in a dusty attic of a Marrakesh craft store selling lamps and the most splendid of perfumes, 170 years ago. If he spills the beans, the special trick is dissolved. So... hush. Some things are better left top secret when it comes to basilisk magic.

⌈ Taehyung ⌋ ➝ Museum Vampire. 750 years old. Paris, London, and Sydney. Always dons crisp vintage tuxedos in the muted, heavily tailored style of the 1920s. He’s gotten attached to that era. Unsurprisingly, museum vampires are truly nostalgic creatures. Perhaps, also a bit melancholic at one point. Immortality is a two-edged sword. So, Taehyung clings to everything that endures the times. Statues, rustic vases, coin collections, preserved tunics, temple relics, especially fossils of all kind. His favorite place to roam at night is the museum shop or department for Greek, Etruscan, and Roman Antiquities. And indeed, it is the Louvre, what other museum could it be. Taehyung has mastered a convenient invisibility spell at the whooping age of 142 by chance after sneaking around the graveyard of Montmartre, trying to blend in with some friendly ghosts who taught him a trick or two. So the CCTV and guards don’t pick up on him unless he manipulates objects displayed in the exhibitions. 

Which he feels tempted to. But Taehyung prefers to meet you in a snug alley café at dawn. The one where they don’t serve garlic-heavy dishes. You’ve already seen so much of the museum together in the course of a 4-year relationship. And he can’t possibly dick you down in the gallery of Dutch and Italian masters no matter how horny either of you is, mind you. You’d get anemic fast if you’d be sucking and fucking all the time anyways, and Taehyung really isn’t down to take a lot of blood from you. A little, as you always call it, prick’n’lick is what he usually goes for when you have time to meet in your flat. And maybe a deep, warm creampie to top it off because he knows that his semen does some stuff to you that only vampire magic can cause. You’ll be giddy and talk complete nonsense about Dadaism, Kahlo, and Kandinsky for three hours. Pregnant you can’t get since human with human, vampire with vampire is how the math goes. But extremely high, apparently. So, prick’n’lick. Your favorite activity. Talk about oral fixation: Vampire Tae has a strong obsession with strawberry ice cream. And... caressing your body, seriously. He is into some major VDA (Vampiric Displays of Affection). Believes that in your past life, you were the grand dame Mona Lisa herself. And a flapper. He writes poems about that and keeps them in a huge diary in the cellar of the Louvre. Some bittersweet, some sensual, some full of adoration. You treasure your time with him, always. 

⌈ Hoseok ⌋ ➝ Castle Vampire. 1827 years old. UK (Scotland), Greece, China. Dresses exactly the way you think a dapper castle vamp is suited up. Ruffles, tight pants, gloves, large hats with feathers, tons of Italian lace, even slightly heeled shoes with pointed toes. Has been alive when Sparta was still a thing, saw what went down in the uproar of the actual French Revolution in passing, met Marilyn Monroe, almost got on the Titanic as a passenger, but has enjoyed the Rennaissance the most so far so there’s that. He lived in forts, churches, and even a small barn for some parts of his life until deciding to buy himself a fucking hilltop palace where you can live together. Because lavish castles are, ultimately, what appeals to Hoseok the most, and there is definitely enough space for all of your interests ... and sex toys. Anyway. How did all of that begin. So: The two of you met at a medieval exhibit in Perth where they displayed armors and pieces of weaving. Fell for each other, bonded over a kaleidoscope of shared interests, history knowledge in particular. Hoseok enjoys conversations about mythology, he loves that. And binging a lot of shows on Netflix. Gotta bridge the old and the new. Not that he doesn’t own a giant home theatre with perfect sound system. Maybe he just wants to cuddle up with you in bed and sob when another character dies together so the entire castle staff will hear. No worries though, they’re used to it.

Netflix aside: Aristocracy makes him feel at home. The sunshine regularly hosts interspecies balls with flamboyant masquerade themes so everyone can show up how they’re comfortable. That concerns particularly the slightly introverted elves and shapeshifters from downtown. The last huge ball went under the motto ‘The Glamor of Old Hollywood’ and you dressed up as Rita Hayworth and Fred Astaire, dancing all night and plundering the buffet. Hell of a good time. National holidays are holy to vampire Hoseok and basically equal date night. Given his high sex drive, there can’t be enough special occasions either way. To ride his thighs, his face, mark each other down forever until the pants are a little too tight at the damn front. The guy gets shaky knees at the smallest sight of a delicious pulsing vein no matter his century-long chance to accustom himself with human necks, so you agreed to go by a schedule — #SuckingSaturdays only — and you wear thick scarves. Which fits the moody UK weather anyways. The Scots really dig Hoseok in case you’ve been wondering. You can bet Hoseok is the star of Scottish twitter. 

⌈ Namjoon ⌋ ➝ Mountain Vampire. 3008 years old. Nepal, Kenya, Peru. You tease him about wearing a long, strangely-always-white cloak and staff because it gives him the semblance of a beardless twen Gandalf. He smokes a pipe, too, but not in your presence anyways. Whatever is in there... seems to elevate him. Literally. Namjoon can levitate. There’s no other way he could use in order to visit you in the first place. A beautiful, abandoned pagoda seated on top of a snowy crest is his makeshift home, inaccessible to everyone but him. Only a secluded place like this is suitable for his ancient kind. To meet you in a warmer and more human-friendly environment, he will elegantly descend from his premises to get together with you in the town located at the base of the mountain. As many nights as possible. Always with a self-made present. Like freshly assembled tea leaves or a little talisman he carved from a piece of wood. Found on one of his long evening walks. He knows what eternity feels like best, that your life is but a glimpse compared to his, so every moment will count. He’ll make it right, no worries. It’s Kim Namjoon, taking care of things. You can always rely on him.

On all levels, he never ceases to surprise. Vampire Joon has surpassed the principles of ingestion, sleep, and a sense of temperature. Hell, even finances. He simply breathes and exists — and most importantly: reads for hours — without any external efforts. Even the Middle Ages didn’t leave a single wrinkle on his face. And he is still the best experienced person to share a bed with. No sexual technique is foreign to him, and post-sex spooning conversations are immensely entertaining. Namjoon has a lot of philosophical thoughts on human-vampire relations and met countless historical figures. He’s also befriended the Yeti at one point, resulting in quite a few hilarious narrations that he will retell on request every time you meet. And he makes them funnier every night. Because Namjoon thinks your laugh is prettier than every sunrise and sunset he’s seen around the world combined, on his every voyage. The most interesting part is: He doesn’t drink any blood even if he has fairly sharp fangs that you often catch yourself staring at for minutes. He still seems more invested in making you cum. With sweet words, brainteasers, and wisdoms spoken into your ears quietly. He’s a walking riddle himself. As expected, who are we kidding. Namjoon, no matter the fleeting centuries he has seen, is a gem and all yours for a lot of nights to come. 

◇ castle: Château de la Mothe-Chandeniers (South-East France, 13th century)

[jupiterjunebug]

WHERE'S THE WEREWOLF ESSAY, OP??

@malaloba @bisexualducknewton You also dared me to say this so you get a tag

Okay so fun facts about Tyler Keegan Casey (I literally just wanted to make a joke about Tyler Casey abbreviating to Tyler K.C):

His parents, Edgar Casey and Rebecca Wilson, got married at 18. Their reasoning was "hey, we've been together all of high school, we still like each other, and I think our kids would be really hot." A bit of the shine wore off for Rebecca, though, when it turned out Edgar inherited a controlling streak from his parents. He got it in his head that his growth as a person required moving as far away from tiny little Casper, WV as he could. Which was fine, and would've been true if he’d put any actual EFFORT into growing up, except he made that decision without consulting his wife. Family was the most important thing in the world for her, which meant she didn't want to leave. Unfortunately, family was the most important thing in the world to her, and Edgar was technically her family.As far away as possible turned out to be Fortville, Indiana. At around 3000 people, it was certainly bigger than Casper, but much smaller than Edgar's ambitions. Unfortunately, they'd run out of gas, and got stuck in town long enough for Rebecca to work up her courage and deliver an ultimatum: they were eight hours from Casper, close enough to drive over, and she'd live no further away than that.Tyler was born a few years later and grew up the only "daughter" of the household, pretty in a generic way and polite to a fault. His homesick mama taught him that he'd know when he found his people on account of the decision to give up everything for them would only hurt a little. His pyramid-scheme chasing daddy taught him that the key to success is for people to think you're one of their people, and who gives a shit if it's true or not?Up until he was twenty he was a full-on social chameleon: he wore the closest thing he could get to the "right" clothes, he did his hair in the "right" way, he laughed at the right jokes and had a crush on all the right boys. Third runner up for prom queen, dated at least three members in the football team (the breakups were never his fault, of course. He'd take a relationship as far as the other person wanted, he only dated them because they wanted to date him after all), popular but not so popular for people to consider him a threat.Every holiday, Tyler and his mama went off to Casper to visit her family. That meant he ended up at the kids table with his two younger cousins Franc ( @keplersheetz) and Vicki. Franc and Vicki were practically sisters, Franc lived with Vicki's parents whenever her ma was off dealing with her host of mental issues, which meant that Tyler was kind of the third wheel.

Tyler ended up the responsible one, and town gossip went on about how they hoped he'd be a good influence, because wasn't he just a perfect little child? Gossip about Franc went on about how she was wild, about how she didn't follow rules, if she wasn't careful she'd end up just like her mother and didn't Vicki's parents worry about if she was a bad influence? No one gossiped about Vicki at all.

It created a weird circle of jealousy, where Tyler envied Franc for having the guts to be herself, Franc worried that Vicki would end up liking Tyler better than her, and Vicki wished somebody might talk about her instead of other people’s “influence” on her. In general, Tyler and Franc didn't get along on account of they were very different and had no interests in common, but when you spend months each year as an obligatory playmate you end up developing at least a little fondness.Tyler went to Indiana University Bloomington, close enough to home for both his parents and also in possession of a Bachelors program for early childhood education. He quickly acquired a job at the library, a reputation as "a pleasure to have in class," an overcommitment to several clubs, and a thoroughly mediocre boyfriend. He also ended up in two classes with and as a coworker to Monet, ( @pleasekalemenow). In sophomore year, the two were roommates and in three classes together, which was haha a funny coincidence. Then in Spring term Tyler had a stress breakdown and Monet was so thrown by composed, fake-ass Tyler losing his shit over something completely minor that she ended up sitting with him for four hours and now they're best friends.In the summer before Junior year he was like "hey wait a fucking second, if I'm completely changing my personality around other people so that they'll like me...do they actually like me?" and decided that fuck it, I'm going to just have my own personality and work my hardest to make it so people find that person likable. The most obvious shift - aside from him breaking up with his mediocre boyfriend and quitting half of his clubs - was coming out as, you know, a dude.

His parents didn't really...get it? His mom continues to this day to treat it as something she supports but just can't understand, and his dad kind of took it as a personal attack because his dad is a self-obsessed jackass. The rest of the family didn't really express an opinion on any of this, on account of Vicki had a baby and Franc ran away from home just a little while later. Compared to having a daughter under 18 and just straight up disappearing, being trans wasn't all that embarrassing to them.Things went pretty decent for half of Junior year. Then one day while he was watching a kindergarten class, the last kid to be picked up at the end of the day turned into an eldritch horror and ate the other student teacher. The FBI’s Paranormal Research and Investigation division showed up and was like "hey I'm pretty sure you can guess that we're going to tell you to keep this hush hush, so keep this fucking hush hush." Tyler went "wow you know I don't like being kept in the dark about all this," so he changed his major to criminal justice and worked his ass off to graduate at the same time as everyone else. Then he joined the FBI, and when they were interviewing him he dropped some line about "oh, I saw something once and the, uh, I think it was PRI? Said that it was top secret dangerous business. I'd like to solve murders like that :)" and the PRI kind of went "well...I guess? we can hire? Him? He did a god job on all of his exams...we have no reason not to."At around this time he played the love interest in Monet's breakout limited access TV show, Once Upon a Cryptid. This show eventually gained Dr. Horrible levels of cult-classic fame, and Tyler is eternally thankful that T has at this point changed his look enough that no one really recognizes him beyond people he talks to on case being like "haha isn't it funny that you look kind of like actor Tyler Casey and you're an FBI agent just like his character?" And he just says "haha yeah I get that a lot :)"The PRI was also like "hey can you keep an eye on this person who is causing trouble with conspiracy theory shit?" Tyler says "uh yeah, sure? Anything I should know?" And the PRI is like "well it's your cousin, but other than that, nah, glhf :)"Tyler found this situation Vaguely Uncomfortable, so instead of being actually good at his job he took this opportunity to leave reminders to eat and warnings to keep her head down when she overreached. They were all signed with "The FBI Agent That's Watching You Right Now" and wow isn't it fucked up that they're closer as anonymous FBI stalker and conspiracy theorist than they were as proper childhood playmates? It fucks me up sometimes.Five years before the game starts, he goes on an investigation into what may or may not be a supernatural murderer. While in the area he runs into August Caraway ( @transagentstern), who is. Super his type. He immediately starts finding excuses to spend time w/ the hot, sensitive, painter, asking August to be his guide around the area. And also if he could see that painting that August is working on because it sounds really :) great :). Eventually he comes to the conclusion that the long periods of time between attacks and the COD indicate either a werewolf attack or a very patient predator. He goes "well, it's the new moon tonight...so if I take August out on a da-I MEAN INVESTIGATION into that clearing in the woods it'll be safe."Spoilers! It isn't!They get attacked by a werewolf. Tyler says "well, I'm an FBI agent so I should be the one to sacrifice myself" and tries to shoot the werewolf. It quickly takes him to the ground, but hey! At least August has time to run! Except instead of running, August goes up to try and save Tyler. Which ends in them both getting bitten before the silver bracelets August always wears fend the thing off. August manages to drag Tyler to civilization before losing consciousness, and the two wake up in separate hospitals. August is told Tyler got sent to a special FBI hospital, but is fine. Tyler is told August got tired of waiting around for him to wake up and left. (More fun facts: this happened the day before Pigeon's birthday! Wow! Terrible)Tyler is kept under observation for the rest of the month, just to make sure he's fine. He is, of course, not fine. The PRI is super stoked to have access to someone who is fully willing to spend the rest of his month j chillin' and then come in on the full moons, on account of most of the werewolves they have access to are ones they caught and have to keep hold of all the time. Which, like, unlawfully contained civilians are a shitty baseline.So, despite having research in their name, the PRI kinda fucking sucks at research. Their methodology is to just try shit until they figure out 1. How to kill the monster and 2. How to spot the affliction/how it progresses. They are perfectly aware of how to kill werewolves, so really all they do is stage observations under different stress conditions to play “how to spot a werewolf”.

Every experiment is just put them in a cage with moonlight access, see whether the transformation is faster/slower when the person has a certain diet/fitness level/etc. Most of the subjects can’t leave bc they’d run away and are also liable to transform sometimes which is inconvenient.

The PRI isn't especially concerned about Tyler, because they know one of the conditions for a transformation is high stress and if there's one thing he's good at it's completely repressing an anxiety attack, so he's able to pretty much do his job aside from the whole "locked up under the full moon" thing. Of course, he's ostracized by his coworkers on account of he's like. Literally a monster. But that's fine! He has Monet! Who he never tells anything about all this because he doesn't want to worry her, and also because her brother (coincidentally August, though Tyler doesn't know that) died around the time of his attack and he doesn't want her to blame herself for never trying to come see him.Good things that happen in these 5 years: he has an amicable relationship with Franc. He gets good at his job. He and Monet discover that the uncanny coincidences which led to them always having classes together carry over into their adult life, and they constantly run into each other while performing their respective jobs. She sometimes invites him to parties to stop men from hitting on her, and because he looks vaguely like Jake Gyllenhaal (that's Tyler's face claim) they get to laugh about all the tabloid rumors that Monet is dating Jake.The bad news is Tyler never had access to the other werewolves prior to the attack (it wasn't his division, and he wasn't usually in a position to take anything alive) which means he's never been around to see a new one, to watch the arc of their deterioration. Usually it goes like this: they wake up, alone and naked in a room with only a bed, a desk, and an uncomfortable wooden chair. They are given clothing by an FBI agent, sometimes that agent is sympathetic, sometimes sneering, but usually expressionless. Each full moon they transform, and remember nothing of it save pain, hunger, and the feeling of their claws digging into the metal walls. Fear is a trigger for transformation, as is anger. They are always afraid, always angry. Eventually, it becomes rare to see them in their human forms.The PRI is fucking stupid. A reasonable person might say "duh, werewolves turn when they're scared, maybe if we put them someplace less scary they'll stop turning so much." Instead, they write in their notes, the notes Tyler receives, "we're fairly certain that, at some point, the humanity of a werewolf is completely lost." He only sees werewolves that have not been human in months, or even years. Or, he sees the ones who are even worse off.The worse news is that Tyler is told there's a cure. Sometimes, the PRI manages to poke and prod at a werewolf and for reasons we just don't understand they never transform again. So he doesn't argue with the tests, and even if he writes a will he doesn't tell Monet anything because he might be fine, and he doesn't want to worry her. He throws himself into his work and into making Monet happy, because he wants to make sure that if he is lost he leaves a legacy. There's something to prove that Tyler Casey's existence was justified.Then he finds out what the cure entails. It's not recovery, not at all; it's pushing someone so hard, making them so afraid, that their body can't take being afraid anymore. A person who’s too tired to feel doesn't shift, not even under the full moon, because the werewolf's state of mind is defined by the person's emotions before it happens (so if someone was actually CALM, really truly calm, then they'd manage to control it, but hunger and anger and fear can all throw that out of wack). If the person is numb, there is nothing for the curse to react to.Tyler Casey would rather die after trying his hardest than live longer but not be able to do anything. So, when he manages to find a job opening at The Askar Foundation, a secret society with more funding and more knowledge than the FBI could ever hope for, he has no qualms spilling the PRI's secrets in exchange for a position as a field agent.As you can probably guess, August, Monet, and Franc are all there as well. The circumstances of their recruitment were significantly less...consensual than his (Monet and Franc recently saw too much and got pressganged in, and after nearly killing Franc while transformed August got dragged in for Askar's own brand of tests). This leads to a veritable five layer dip of fucking drama:1. Franc and Tyler have a private conversation which leads to the revelation of several character secrets on both their parts. This ends when Tyler and Franc both insist that they saw different things during one of the scenes. Franc has always had the ability to tell when people lie to her, but she is also convinced she's right about their topic of conversation (which uh, she IS right, so). That means that, despite the fact that she can't feel him lying, he MUST be. She's convinced that he's had the supernatural ability to get around her own uncanny powers this whole time, and thus they engaged in a Comedy of Errors where instead of mistaken identities it’s Tyler saying things that further convince Franc he's trying to manipulate the entire team2. The Askar foundation would very much like to keep their shiny new field agent, and also Tyler still has connections to the FBI and him snitching to them would be.........inconvenient. So they're willing to put effort, within reason, into making sure he doesn't find out anything that might cause problems, like the fact that August is a kind of monster Tyler has a massive vendetta against. Or uh...anything else that might make him question them. This leads to3. Askar shutting down a conversation between him and Monet, leading to her concluding that talking about their past experiences with the supernatural OR the workings of Askar will never go well. (Exacerbated by the fact that Askar had already been trying to keep her from finding out shit about her brother) 4. Consequently, Monet will no longer talk to him about deep personal topics if they lead back to these things at ALL5. Franc ended up in a romantic entanglement w/ the monster of the week, who is a shapeshifter unwillingly being used to bring about...the apocalypse. He thinks the reason she doesn’t trust him is because she figured out he was a werewolf, and doesn’t trust him/is keeping an eye on him so she can put him down when he becomes dangerous. So he thinks she hates him bc he’s a shapeshifter that has no control over himself, but then she’s fine with...the OTHER shapeshifter that has no control over himself.6. August thinks Tyler hates werewolves because of the attack, and is afraid to enter a relationship with him because he wouldn't be able to keep his condition a secret7. Tyler refuses to let himself entertain notions of actually DATING August, because Tyler thinks he's going to die and doesn't want to hurt even MORE people when he goes8. Tyler and Monet platonically love each other so much and are also living together in Seinfeld's mansion that she stole the keys to, and Tyler is an idiot which means August thinks Tyler wants to date Monet (August's SISTER)So tl;dr, Tyler thinks that after Franc gained access to more Askar files she suddenly doesn't trust him (he assumes she knows he's a werewolf), he knows that Monet suddenly doesn't want to TALK to him and knows that if he discovers anything suspicious he thus cannot tell her, and he knows he......really, really, REALLY is starting to enjoy August's companyThis means that conversations oscillate between Tyler being professionally friendly with all his coworkers, Franc interpreting something random as a personal attack, Monet deeply wishing she could tell Tyler something, and then a completely stupid conversation where Tyler and August are flirting about something stupid and getting cockblocked by Tyler's hangups and August remembering that as far as he's concerned Tyler and Monet should get together.Oh and also Askar definitely is fucking with his head at least once a session.

[dreadhaus-literature]

{Collection} Double Trouble #3

“…Sarcophagus’ aren’t supposed to open…right?” 

The question echoed in the otherwise silent space, known by most in the Haus as the Keeping Room. It housed a plethora of mystical, magical, and/or cursed items that found their way to the Haus--or that belonged to members of the Haushold after they moved in. The sealed room was monitored by a hand-selected group from the Family (namely those with expertise in the handling of such occult items) and access to the Room itself was strictly monitored.

The problem was, the people inside the room definitely had access to be there...even if a couple of them didn’t exactly want to be.

“Did anyone hear me?” Jax asked, a follow-up to his first question. He was standing beside Monica, with his twin directly on her other side--and giving him one hell of a glare, one Jax met with his usual annoyance. “What, Luc?! No one fuckin’ answered me!”

“Everyone can fucking hear you, muttface, you’re yelling.” Dot hissed, standing a little ways away from the other three. “Would you keep your damn voice down? Do you know what an inside voice is or didn’t Angelo teach you in class yet?”

“If he did, Jax missed it by talking so loudly he couldn’t hear the lesson.” Lucca didn’t speak often (Monica was the only person he talked to regularly, and usually even then it was telepathically rather than with his voice)--but when Lucca did speak, it was in the driest monotone the world had ever heard.

“At least I get to bring my papers to Momma for good boy points.”

Lucca didn’t miss a beat. “Mother likes bad boys.”

“THAT’S WHY I GET DETENTIONS ALL THE TIME--”

There was a sudden, metallic clang! a gilded urn bounced off the side of Jax’s head and clattered to the ground. He whirled, finding Dot staring at him with her hands on her hips.

“Did you throw that at me?!”

“I sure fucking did, would you keep your voice down? We’re not exactly supposed to be doing this.”

“Why are we doing this?”

“I don’t know why you or Jax are here, Lucca, because I distinctly remember just asking Monica to come along but if you must know,” Dot gestured with one hand toward the open sarcophagus. “I heard someone put a mummy in here and it would be perfect for the Halloween party tomorrow.”

“Don’t you have a mummy, Dottie?” Monica asked, earning her a smile from Dot.

“I sure do, our lovely literal mummy’s boy Horus.” Dot held up a finger. “But I never make anyone in the Haus actually work at any of the Halloween events, then they wouldn’t get to participate! And he’s just a little bean. Wouldn’t it be super cool to have a real, scary mummy at the party?”

Before Monica could even attempt to be swayed by Dot’s very obvious attempts at doing so, Jax piped up again.

“Aight, but back to what I asked before, his lid ain’t supposed to be open, right?”

“And if he’s in here, he’s not supposed to be out.” Lucca dropped into the conversation like a nail to a coffin lid.

“First of all, shut up, both of you. Second of all,” Dot turned back to the open lid of the sarcophagus. The incredibly large, intricately crafted gold screamed wealth in a past life...but also belied what most know about mummies--that if you disturb a mummy’s eternal rest, you could find yourself cursed. Was Dot willing to risk that just for a Halloween party?

Absolutely she was.

“Second of all...?” Jax prompted.

Dot swallowed. “Second of all, maybe someone just left the lid off?”

“Yeah. I’m sure he wanted some fresh air.”

Dot gave Lucca a look. “I liked you better when you were mute.”

Lucca just rested his chin on the top of Monica’s head as if to say, ‘she doesn’t.’

Monica had to bite back a laugh, both at the banter between siblings and the situation she found herself in. Antics in the Haus were pretty much the stuff urban legends and stories were made of; someone was always getting into something ridiculous or dangerous or ridiculously dangerous but it was admittedly rare that Dot was the cause of such. She tended to air on the more cautious side, which was partly why Monica had agreed to help her do this. The other half was straight up curiosity about the supposed mummy that was sitting in their Keeping Room for some unknown reason. No one seemed to know where the damn thing even came from, though no one had really asked. With a Haus this large, it was pretty commonplace occurrence to just assume someone was responsible and work the details of that out at a later date.

Dot took a few steps toward the open lid of the sarcophagus, which prompted the trio behind her to do the same. Monica was kept firmly between the young twins, who though they were considered pups by the majority of the Family, were fiercely protective of the woman they affectionately called their Mother. Jax was craning his head, straining up on his toes to try and see into the sarcophagus but Lucca was his usual reserved self, lacing his fingers through Monica’s just in case. She gave his fingers a grateful squeeze, hooking her other arm through Jax’s.

“What’s it look like?” Monica asked quietly. “There’s no bugs or anything, right?”

“...No, love, no bugs,” Dot reassured, her gaze on the contents of the open sarcophagus. “He looks pretty...normal?”

“Normal?”

Dot paused for another moment or two before she huffed. “I’m kinda disappointed, he’s not even scary looking. Or gooey. Or hideous.”

Now Monica was really curious, and with the twins escorting her, the trio came to stand beside Dot to peer into the sarcophagus. True to what Dot said, it was the most normal looking mummy they’d ever seen. In fact--

“Is this--Is he wrapped in toilet paper?” Monica asked, and given her hands were full, it was Dot who reached down to tug at the cloth covering the motionless body.

“What the fuck, this is toilet paper!” Dot yanked some of it off with a snap of her wrist. “What the ever-loving fuck is going--”

“...Hnnnnnnh...”

The group leapt back in unified surprise when the toilet paper wrapped body began to groan and writhe, but given it wasn’t tightly bound it only took a few shoulder shimmies before the paper began to fall away from the once-obscured features.

And Dot about kicked the sarcophagus off it’s stand onto the floor.

“W-What’s going on?! ...Aw man, did Wade wrap me up in toilet paper again?!”

It was Bob, from HYDRA, who for some inexplicable reason was bound in toilet paper and left inside the Haus’s Keeping Room--well, not inexplicable. There was a definite explanation to his predicament and it was that Wade Wilson has the worst sense of humor of anyone in the Haus.

“Bob...what the fuck are you doing in here?” Dot’s tone was measured, but closely resembled the calm of the sea right before a hurricane. Troubled waters lay ahead.

“Wade’s been tricking me all month!” Bob all but wailed, trying to sit up--for some reason the toilet paper binds were giving him some difficulty, though the more he wiggled it was apparent Wade had duct taped him before putting the toilet paper around him. This “trick” seemed more thought out than most of the Merc’s actual superhero or mercenary work. “He even warned me this would happen, he’s been making me into a mummy for the last week! Last time he hung me upside down so long in Spider-Man’s webbing that I lost consciousness!”

“You need new friends.” Lucca commented.

Jax, on the other hand, was in hysterics. “That’s the funniest shit I ever heard! Oh shit, I wonder if Wilson’ll let me join in!”

Dot didn’t even bother, that was Monica’s territory. She was too busy hauling Bob up to a sitting position by his ear--but as soon as he was sitting upright, a DON’T UNWRAP BEFORE OCTOBER 31ST sign was exposed on his back.

“Come on, dumbo. We’re getting you unwrapped and then you’re going to help me and Monica find a real mummy.”

“O-Oh, thank you--W-Wait what?!”

“Yeah, what?” Monica asked, meeting Dot’s gaze as the taller woman turned.

“Baby, Mama needs a mummy, and we’re getting Wade back for picking on Bob by having you come along. Now Bob can say he spent time with you that Wade didn’t get to.”

“Y-You’re going to get me killed.” Bob quietly input, though his heart was in his throat at the idea of actually getting to spend time with the Empress of the Family.

Dot smacked the back of his head, leaning in his personal space. “I’m going to kill someone if I don’t get the mummy I want before tomorrow, how about that?”

Jax raised his free hand. “Luc an’ I are gonna come too if you takin’ Momma.”

“Do the Alphas know?”

“Shut the hell up Lucca of course they don’t, who the hell has time for their nonsense? Not I, said the current mummyless wonder.” Dot hauled Bob out of the sarcophagus with one arm, gesturing toward the door. “Let’s go, I think the downtown museum has a mummy or two out for Halloween, we’ll just take one.”

“This is a b-bad idea,” Bob stammered, moreso because Monica looked at him when he started to talk.

“You hang out with Wade, you should be used to bad ideas.” Dot quipped dryly, the group making their way out of the Keeping Room.

“Bob?”

Bob nearly smacked into the nearby shelf when Monica said his name. “Y-Y-Yeah?”

“You have toilet paper stuck to your shoe.”

[microsuedemouse]

Yes mom please tell us your favourite Canadian David Headcanons Like I, the mere European, have no clue about Canada at all but I'd gladly embrace all of your Headcanons 😄😄

oh boy okay you asked for it pal

(for the record: you may consider all of this as canon to Run Away Home, and I will tag it as such, but you may also adopt these for your own use if you wish! lmk though, I’d love to know which ones y’all like!)

in RAH I’ve been headcanoning David as coming from Hamilton for simplicity’s sake - it’s where I live. let’s go deeper: when I was six my town and in fact the whole county of Flamborough was amalgamated into the city of Hamilton. much of Flamborough remains relatively rural. so:

David’s mom lives in a nice suburb somewhere and he grew up there on the edge between urban and rural areas, knowing people from both (okay so this is just my life shut up)

His grandmother and grandfather, though, owned a small farm out in the more rural area and he spent a lot of time there as a kid, especially in the summers.

he went to college at Mohawk and got an apartment in the city… this is truly just my RAH-specific background but here we are so why not share

He loves Hamilton’s art community and its nature and parks and many many waterfalls

He LOVES to go camping wherever he can, with a special fondness for Banff and Algonquin

like 80% of us, he got his first job at Tim Hortons. Unlike 80% of us, he did not utterly hate it and can even still eat the food.

he grew up watching a lot of American TV/consuming American media, like the rest of us, but he also loved the fundamental Canadian stuff - Fred Penner’s Place and Crazy Quilt and Mr. Dressup and Big Comfy Couch were all major childhood staples alongside things like Mr. Rogers. Like all of us, he cried when Mr. Dressup passed away and still has weird random memories of Nanalan’ that he doesn’t think he could explain if he tried. He owned all of Fred Penner’s albums as a kid and will still buy new ones, and see him live any chance he gets, because Fred Penner is a national treasure. (He has tried teaching Fred Penner songs at camp, but for some reason the kids never seem to be into it.)

when he outgrew little-kids’ TV he still watched a lot of Teletoon and Family Channel stuff. He’s seen all of 6Teen.

his coffee order is a double double (two creams, two sugars).

he unironically dresses like a Canadian pretty often - flannels and the good ol’ Canadian tuxedo (denim jacket worn with jeans) are totally normal to his wardrobe.

he learned to drive a tractor before a car.

Gwen is surprised and delighted when he tells her he’s been drinking since he was nineteen, and then she’s disappointed when he points out that’s legal drinking age in Ontario.

he normally drinks ciders (not especially Canadian but just my hc lol), but he does like a good Caesar or Canadian whiskey (he just calls it rye).

also: he learned how to open two capped bottles with each other’s necks (no bottle opener) at a bush party once. he likes that this information shocks Gwen and decides not to tell her that he ended up there because he absolutely misunderstood what a ‘bush party’ entailed.

(admittedly all of these drinking headcanons come out of a fic I started and haven’t gotten around to finishing. idk when I will so I’ll go ahead and share here)

he doesn’t love winter but it takes at least 40 cm (~16 in) of snow and/or a windchill of -30°C (-22°F) or lower to stop him from going about his day.

as I noted in that other post, he loves Letterkenny because it’s just so damn accurate - he’s known so many people like the characters in the show! It’s definitely cruder than he’d like and he’d die of embarrassment if the campers or someone found out how much he loves it, but it’s just so funny. (what he doesn’t realise is that no one at Camp Campbell would be able to make full sense of the show.)

he also loves a good Rick Mercer Rant

he’s enjoyed his fair share of Corner Gas, and some Trailer Park Boys, too.

He loves Murdoch Mysteries and got a kick out of Republic of Doyle as well.

He’s read all of the Anne of Green Gables books and grew up watching the cartoon often. He still gets emotional when he thinks too much about Anne and Gilbert.

Canadian music, MY DUDES. He loves the Barenaked Ladies, Great Big Sea and anything involving Alan Doyle, the Arkells (he’s from Hamilton, it’s basically required), Lights, Alanis Morissette, The Tragically Hip, I could go on….

like literally the rest of the country, he watched the televised final concert of the Hip - it was in August 2016, so he was still at camp and had to watch an online stream that wavered in quality, and then he watched a recording again when he got back home - and cried his eyes out at the end.

He’s been to every province at least briefly, but never to the territories - they’re next on his travel list. Canada is huge and beautiful and he wants to see as much of it as he can!

he speaks pretty decent conversational French, but gets really nervous when he messes up or forgets a word, and the more nervous he is the worse he gets. it snowballs and often ends in him panicking.

he’s a very, very bad skater and absolutely useless at hockey. he’s okay at lacrosse and downhill skiing. he can handle cross-country skiing or snowshoeing pretty well, though!

and he spent every winter tobogganing down local hills. okay, he still spends every winter tobogganing down local hills, even after it was outlawed. no one pays attention to that law.

he LOVES maple syrup. and maple taffy. and maple cookies. and everything else maple. he and his mom have been tapping the trees on her property every year for as long as he can remember.

he wouldn’t tell you he cares much about sports, but if you insult the Leafs, the Blue Jays, the Argos, the Habs, or the Ti-Cats, he gets suddenly and irrationally defensive. he barely follows the games so he doesn’t even know why he gets so defensive.

(if pushed, Ti-Cats over Argos, and Leafs over Habs, even though being a Leafs fan is outrageously depressing.)

He would probably take a bullet for Wayne Gretzky. Again, he doesn’t know why. He just would.

On the note of Gretzky: you know the little cheers that kids add to the lyrics of ‘Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer’? After the line “you’ll go down in history,” many American kids add “like George Washington!” Like other Canadian kids, David says, “like Wayne Gretzky!”

He has been known to compulsively start singing “Don’t you put it in your mouth” when trying to stop campers from putting shit in their mouths.

He has also been known to remind kids to “stay alert, stay safe!”

He also still wants a house hippo. Damn it. We all still want a house hippo…

in general he makes a lot of references to Canadian ads that we all remember vividly but no one outside of the country knows about. “MoooOOOM, Aidan cut me in HALF again!”

if presented with enough rocks he will just start building inukshuks. sometimes he does this at camp and the kids wonder what the fuck these weird rock structures are.

his wallet is still full of Canadian Tire money. they have points cards now. and yet he can still never get rid of the Canadian Tire money. it is eternal

he has a rim roller on his keychain. once Max asked what it was and David only sighed deeply. “another free coffee…” he said distantly

he, like most of us, has a very love-hate relationship with Toronto.

he calls it T.O. or T-dot, usually.

one time he was talking to an American who goes to Toronto sometimes for business, and they made a passing comment about Union Station. David’s eye began to twitch.

He learned to drop his ‘eh’s while in the states when he was still a camper, because other campers used to make jokes about it sometimes. they slide right back into his vocabulary the moment he gets home.

he still pronounces ‘roof’ in a way that strikes the kids as weird, and still uses Canadian spellings most of the time - colour instead of color, grey instead of gray, etc.

the boy loves ketchup chips. and all-dressed chips. and poutine. and back bacon. and aero bars, and kinder eggs, and actual smarties. I could go on.

I just scrolled up and saw how long this list has gotten so I… I will stop. but oh my god, I could go on forever, probably. Canadian David is good shit. I will be your Canadian David consultant if you want.

[oblivion-time]

The Wolf Who Huffed and Puffed: Part 3

Finally I managed to finish editing this story and now it's finally finished in my document~ Because I'm feeling pretty nostalgic of the 2012 Oblivion-Time when I managed to pump out new chapters every third day, I'll try to update this story every Sunday or every other Sunday, but Sunday is the day I'll update the story! I hope you all will enjoy this little story of mine~

Part 1 | Part 2 |

AO3 | FF.net  

The Wolf Who Huffed and Puffed

Part 3

"― and you're ready to go. If the drain starts acting up again you can contact us and we'll send Gopher to fix it." Maka's spoke with her kind authority voice as papers rustled and a chair shrieked loudly as it was pushed backwards. The high heels of Anya loudly clicked in his sensitive wolf ears and she headed for the door. The door creaked and closed as she exited. Soul waited for Anya to disappear down the corridor, but Maka had other plans.

The door to the record room opened and he was met by Maka's wide mischievous grin. "Took you long enough," he spoke and Maka's eyes seemingly darkened as she pushed the door even more open. She had the grace of a cat as she grabbed a hold of his shirt and yanked him to her.

"Sorry, Anya just refused to leave. Now we're alone and no more unwanted fables will disturb us."

He smirked sheepishly as her hands ran over his shirt, fingers intriguingly lingering on the buttons. "For a second there, I thought you forgot I was stuck in the record room." Maka placed her index finger against his lips, hushing him down.

"Less talking and more kissing." He didn't hesitate. He grabbed her wrist and smashed his lips to hers, not wasting no time. Hands grouped her soft tiny curves and the glorious ass hiding under her tight pencil skirt. Her taste never ceased to blow his mind and sooth his uncovered addicting for the taste of her mouth.

Two months. Two pure blissful months of living the dream. Two months of whispers of affection, kissing, cuddling and steaming short sessions in her office. There was an excitement of sneaking around and doing it in every place they could without getting caught. It was beyond excitement when he was writing his reports in his office and the door would slide open and Maka would sneak inside. The click of the lock never ceased to ignite the fire between them.

It was something special. He always knew there was something special about her. From the first time he caught her scent centuries ago, he knew she was a very special person to him. He knew wolves would only get attracted to one wolf from their scent and stick to that person, but Maka wasn't a wolf. Heck, he wasn't even attracted to her. Her scent intrigued him and pulled him in, but her less than feral features turned him off. It wasn't until decades upon decades in human form his list of attractions had broadened and he discovered just how long and strong her legs were and how rich her hair was. Centuries of confusion and strange attraction toward her had finally paid off. She loved him. The infamous workaholic Ice Queen had melted her heart and fallen for him. He had no clue how she could've gone from the cheater "Prince Charming" to mass murderer. A girl so well-mannered (except when he teased her while intimate) and focus, she thought he was a good idea. The perfect next boyfriend in line. Whatever her logic behind it was, he was so grateful and lucky. He loved her so much.

He kissed her as if his life depended on it. Maka tugged at his hair as they backed into her desk. He grouped her ass and lifted her up, Maka's legs immediately hugged his waist and eagerly hands popped his buttons the moment her ass was slapped on the paper-covered surface of her desk. Maka pushed his shirt of and his fingers ran over his scar Joe the woodsman had left behind when he gutted him to free the girl in red hoodie. He shivered under her touch as she gently massaged and caressed his scar from beginning to end.

Life was good. And the sex was even better.

She panted loudly as her fingers fisted his hair. Her mews and groans were music to his ears. Her voice was of the finest quality and he could spend the rest of eternity listening to her mews and groans and―

His eyes snapped open and he pulled away, her hands reluctantly let him. In the distance, he heard the front door to the building opening and the sound of heavy boots echoing in the corridor. He knew those steps. He had heard the sluggish lazy steps before, but what the heck was he doing here―

"Soul~" Maka cooed as she encouragingly reeled him closer to her treasure.

"No Maka." Soul yanked her hands from his hair and looked up at her, hearing the steps come closer and closer. "Giriko is coming."

"What?" she squawked. "Why's he coming?"

"Don't know and if we stay like this, he'll catch us."

"Shit." Her eyebrows disappeared under her bangs the moment his steps reached her human hearing. She quickly scrambled off the desk and pulled her skirt down her hips. He couldn't resist watching the hem of her skirt cover up her strong and lean thighs― "What are you standing there for? Hide!" she hissed as she scrambled to button her buttons on her blouse.

"Aren't you going to put on your―"

"You take them." She kicked the discarded forgotten clothing on her foot and it slapped him right in the face. "Happy? Now hide." He was rendered paralysed as her underwear fell into his open hand, it wasn't until Giriko's steps only seconds away from the deputy major's office when he unfroze and quickly crawled under the desk as Maka took her seat, scrambling to fix her messy bun. His breath was stolen when the doorknob twisted, no knock on the door whatsoever and Giriko's heavy boots resonated within the office.

"You should knock," Maka muttered as she scribbled her pen on a piece of paper.

"What? Your office closed for fables?"

"It's common courtesy." The pen was smacked on the desk. "Now what do you want this time? I already told you using those magical ribbons are highly prohibited and our sheriff will make sure you never even as much as breathe a word about reinstating them."

"Ah, your lapdog." Soul grimaced at the sound of his heavy boots coming to a stop in front of the desk and his bony ass taking a seat on the desk, no respect toward the papers on it. "You know, people in town are actually talking about you two."

"Do I looked like I care about what people gossip about?" she muttered as the pen kept on writing on some paper. "Now spit out what you want. I've paperwork to do."

"Really? Is that all you want to do?" Soul almost gaged at the shit-eating tone in his voice. "Other fables like to fantasise about you and your lapdog enjoying some hay-rolling action if you know what I mean."

"I can assure you those rumours are false. Now if that was all you wanted you can leave―"

"But is that really the truth? There is something about you that's… different."

"Stop speaking in riddles and just spit it out. It doesn't suit you."

"Fine. You're the deputy major and he's the sheriff, the head of security, it would be awfully inappropriate if those gossips around town proved to be true since you work so closely to each other."

Soul gritted his teeth at the arrogance in his voice. So what. They were a couple. Maka still did her job like a pro and kept their relationship a secret. It doesn't damage the community. His legs crawled with rage and he just wanted to come out from underneath the desk and rip out his throat so he wouldn't ever utter a single word of his suspicions. His nails dug into his pants, restraining himself and clinging onto the single thought that Maka was the deputy major. She had dealt with worse stuff than Giriko. She knew how to take care of herself without him interfering, but how he would've loved to wring his neck. If only he wasn't given amnesty.

"Look." Maka slapped the pen on the table. "Sheriff Soul and I are on strictly professional basis. You can relax, I wouldn't do anything that could jeopardize the stability of Fabletown."

A loaded pause fell before Giriko slid off her desk. "We will see about that." With heavy steps he exited her office and Maka waited until his steps disappeared for her human hearing before she sighed with relief and pushed her chair back enough to stare at him.

"He knows." She ran her hands down her face. "What are we going to do? If this gets out― I don't even know what will happen!"

"Fuck. We mustn't have been as careful as we thought we were." He ran his hand through his hair. "If blind-ass Giriko can spot love, we're as good as caught."

"We got to come out from hiding, right?" Maka questioned as she looked up from her hands.

"Is that what you want?"

"I― I don't know. But if we don't do it on our terms, things would just be worse if Giriko exposed us."

"But what if he doesn't find out―" he cut himself off at the entrance door slamming open and this time, lighter and rapid footsteps ran through the corridor right toward them. "For the love of― another one is coming fast."

Maka groaned when the steps reached her ears and she quickly scooted back to her desk just in time for her office door to slam open.

"I've something alarming to report." Soul's eyes almost bulged out of his head at the sound of Liz's voice. What the heck was she doing here? She usually came to him when something was wrong. Not Maka.

"What is it?" Maka questioned as Liz slammed her hands on the desk.

"Giriko. He's getting really snoopy and I― I think he's onto you and Soul and―" Liz suddenly paused. "Please don't tell me I almost ran into you two getting it on."

"Soul you can come out." Maka pushed her chair out of the way so he could crawl from out from underneath the desk. He was immediately met by Liz's abnormally large and knowing grin.

"Dudes, I know office romances are exciting and hot and all, but you two have more to lose than anyone else."

"I think what we've going on is nobody's business but ours." Maka muttered under her breath as she fixed her still messy hair.

"When you're the deputy major and the one you're screwing is your close colleague, the sheriff and head of security, the public has the right to question your judgement."

"You want to talk about inappropriate relationships, huh?" Maka snarled and stood up from her chair. "Then let's talk about it."

"Your shirt is buttoned wrong."

Soul choked on his own laughter at the view of the buttons wrongfully buttoned along with her messy bun just screamed dirty and enjoyable hay-rolling action.

Maka glared at him and he immediately covered up his own laughter with a cough. She buttoned her buttons correctly. "Go home Soul. I think Liz and I have to have a serious conversation one on one."

Soul cocked his eyebrow questioningly at Maka, asking her if it was alright and she just nodded. He caressed her shoulder. "I'll be waiting for you back home." He planted a kiss on her cheek before he left the office, closing the door behind him and instantly hot arguments went flying. Out of respect for the two women, he covered his ears as he hurried out of the building and went back home.

He waited up for her, but as the minutes became hours, he started worrying what the fuck kind of beef Liz and Maka had going on. It wasn't until he was half-asleep on the couch, he was awoken by his phone. She texted him and asked him to come over, but not to her apartment, but to the flat at the Woodlands reserved to the deputy major, which she still hadn't moved into since she was so busy with her job.

It was odd. Why on earth would she want him to come to her, and why in the major's flat? Of course she owned the flat, but she had never even stepped a foot inside of it since she became the deputy major.

He didn't question her and went back to the Woodlands, passed her office to find it locked and dark. He took the elevator to the top floor. It plinged once he reached the top floor and the doors opened; surprisingly he was met by darkness within the apartment, too much darkness for her to orientate around the apartment safely with her poor sight compared to his. He heard Maka fiddling with her skirt deep within the humongous apartment and he followed the sound. A strip of warm light escaped the small crack into the room where Maka was. He opened the door and there she sat on a humongous luxurious bed, eyes red and tears smeared on her cheeks.

"Are you okay?" Soul took a seat beside Maka on the bed and rubbed her back comfortingly.

She sniffled and leaned her head on his shoulder. "We got to come out from hiding."

"Is that a bad thing?" Soul rested his own head against her as he held onto her.

"Yes." She wiped away a stray tear. "The council will know and who knows what will happened. What if we have to break up to keep our jobs?"

"We're strong. If someone's going to be able to find a solution to our problem then it is us. I don't think, I know we will be able to find a solution to our problems."

Maka laughed drily. "How can you be so confident?"

"Well, because you're too smart for your own good. You nit-pick the system and you always find a loophole. I know you can do the same this time too."

"No pressure."

Soul chuckled and kissed her temple briefly. "The road will be bumpy, but we can handle it. We brought Asura to justice. We did that together. This will be no sweat. We both love each other and we won't be walking away from each other willingly. We'll both have each other and our jobs. You'll see."

"I hope so." Soul wiped away her tears. "Now how about we go to bed and get a good night's sleep?"

Maka nodded. They did their nightly routines as much as they could in the empty apartment before they crawled under the blanket together. He tugged her under his chin and held onto her, burying his nose in her hair to smell her intriguing scent.

"Soul?" he hummed in response, not opening his eyes. "Did you know Liz was attracted to you when you first met?"

"No. Why do you ask?"

"Do you… have you ever liked her more than a partner?"

He opened his eyes and was met by her impossible green ones. "No."

She sighed with relief and a tired smile spread on her face. "Good. I just wanted your side of the story."

"You don't have to worry about my feelings wavering. It's not in wolves' nature to have multiple partners?"

"Huh?"

He gulped. Shit. He maybe shouldn't have said that. Ah, what the hell. He might as well tell her. "Wolves only have one partner throughout their life. The first time I met you, you just smelled so good."

"Wait, so you were into me because of my smell?"

He cheekily grinned toward her. "Yeah. There was just something about your smell that stood out from everybody else's and reeled me in."

"The first time we met…" the cute wrinkle between her eyebrows appeared. "… it was when we crossed the gate from the Homelands. I don't even know how you could think my scent was fascinating. I hadn't taken a shower in weeks!"

"What can I say?" His hand slid down her back and rested on the back of her thigh lazily thrown over his legs. "Your natural scent is intoxicating. Even with that flowery perfume and deodorant you use, I can still smell your natural musk."

"Have you liked me for that long?"

"No." He squeezed her thigh. "At that time, I was just attracted to your smell. Since you were human and I a wolf, I was confused why I was so attracted to your smell. It wasn't after decades of being in a human body I really started to get attracted to you and fall in love with you."

A smile played on her face as she ran a hand through his wild messy hair. "Do you want to go to the annual Remembrance Day Ceremony with me?"

The annual Remembrance Day Ceremony was to remember their escape from the Homelands and the land they lost from the Adversaries. Every year Maka attended it (since she was a part of the Fabletown's government it would be weird if she didn't) she always arrived alone. No date, no group of friends she hung with. It was all work. She mingled and was polite to the attenders. He however never attended. All the strong perfume smells would drive him nuts.

But attending it with Maka, as her date, it was something he wanted to do.

"Of course."

Maka smiled wide and closed the gap between them, sealing their deal with a hot kiss before they went to sleep.

…

"I'm so nervous," Maka spoke as she nervously stared at the elevator panel as the numbers slowly dropped.

Soul squeezed Maka's hand. "I'm here."

This was it. The moment they knew would come. It was the day they would show the world their love. It was the day they would be judged. This was the start of the challenging future and the test of their love. Either they would make it or break it.

All he could do now was support her.

"Thank you for that." She squeezed his hand back when the elevator came to a stop and the double doors opened. They stepped out of the safety of the elevator and out into the crowded corridor. Instantly other fable's eyes turned to them. Soul could just feel the burning gazes at their entwined hands as they went passed them. He could hear Maka's rapid heart beating in her chest and to be honest, he was just as nervous. He hoped Maka couldn't feel how sweaty his hand was.

The fables whispered about them, so excited at their status and some bothered. He just wanted to shut out the gossip and focus on Maka's hand. It all just turned worse at the long line of fables queueing up at the business office and the judging glares were on them. He just melted at their heated glares and if it wasn't for Maka's hand squeezing his, he would've turned around. Fuck, and he was supposed to be the big bad wolf!

He swallowed the panic and went passed the line of gossiping fables. "How about we go out for dinner tonight?" Maka suggesting, coming to a stop in front of her office door.

"Sure, I'll pick you up as soon as you're off." Maka stood up on her toes and kissed him in front of the line of fables. The fables gasped and outright started gossiping loudly. He kissed her hard before he pulled away, resting his forehead against hers. "I love you."

"Love you too." They shared one last kiss before they pulled away and Maka disappeared inside of her office to deal with another day of fixing the broken system while he was left handling the hoard of fables questioning their relationship.

…

Fuck. He knew coming out would be hard, but damn it was stressing him out. Fables wanted answers and standing in the public eye like that was getting his anxiety working. He quickly confirmed that yes, they were in fact dating, yes, they loved each other and yes, they were rock solid before he quickly retreated back to his own office.

Liz arrived and they did mostly paperwork since the fables seemed to flock wherever he went. It all came to an abrupt halt when Maka called him.

"Soul you get your ass right to my office in five minutes or else I will feed you your testicles!" And she hung up before he could even say anything. His heart sunk in his chest and ice swept over him at her upset voice. He immediately abandoned his paperwork and hurried out of the office, knowing very well that if he was one second late, she couldn't hesitate cutting off his dick. The elevator was to slow. He ran up the stairs and through the corridor, not caring the giggles he received when he burst through Maka's office.

His breath was stolen at her clearly aggravated mess of her hair and her teeth nibbling on her lower lip. "What happened?" He joined her side and comforted her.

"The council happened." She leaned into his touch and accepted the comfort he offered. "Justin came and wanted to know my version of the situation since the gossip had already reached his ears."

"Did you tell him?"

"Yeah," she sighed and her hands fisted her hair. "And then he— he had the nerve saying our relationship was clouding my judgement and the council would have to step in and conduct a trial to see if I really was fit being Fabletown's deputy major."

"I didn't expect any less from that snake." Soul wrinkled his nose. "We all know he's after the deputy major position."

"I know, he's just a lying piece of shit." She slammed her head on the desk and buried her face in her arms. "I know this is a good thing the rest of the council is involved since if just Justin would decide, I would've never been deputy major."

Soul planted a kiss on her temple and ran his hand down her back. "We'll get the council on our side. You'll see. You'll shoot good arguments at them like knives."

Maka blew a raspberry and laughed drily. "I hope so."

He hoped so too. He knew if it came to it where she would be put in a situation where she had to choose between him and her job, he knew he couldn't let her chose. He had already complicated things by accepting her feelings and deepening their relationship, blowing the policy off. As much as he loved her and wanted to stay with her forever, he knew Fabletown needed her more than anything. He couldn't steal her away when all fables in Fabletown needed her.

His heart twisted just at the thought of having to walk away from their relationship. It wouldn't go to that point. He wouldn't allow it. She could keep her job and him. He would make sure of it.

He rubbed her back some more as she stayed silent, keeping her face buried in her arms. He was never good at comforting crying girls. Fuck, all he could do was rubbing her back and she was still down. What on earth could he do to lighten her mood? She always took comfort in calming activities like reading or writing poems or occasionally doing yoga. Fuck. All he could do was sit and hold her.

"The hearing is at dusk in the Witching Well Chamber." she murmured. "Justin said he would gather everybody in the council and we should prepare ourselves for it."

"Yeah." He kissed her temple, snuggling his face into her hair. Her sweet intoxicating scent tickled his nose deliciously, only reminding him how much he treasured her and how he craved her for centuries. He would do whatever it took to protect what they have and make sure she would keep her job.

…

His hand was holding hers far too tightly for her liking, but at the same time, she needed his extravagant touch to keep her in check. It helped her stay focused on her goal: to be with Soul. Whatever it took. Whatever means she had to meet, she was willing. She had dedicated her entire life toward serving a system. From the moment all the fables escaped the Homelands and arrived at New York City, she was with the founding fables and founded Fabletown. She had worked and worked and worked to serve Fabletown and its citizens and make their living as great as possible among the mundies. Every day she had gotten up from bed and went to work, she worked early and late hours, eliminating all possibilities of hobbies and family life outside of her work. Her job had only existed. For the past centuries her life was her work. Her life was revolved around her position and helping the fables in Fabletown; but now, she was more than willing to let it go and start something new.

A whole new chapter in her life was at the threshold, just within reach if the door were meant to be opened. She had done her time and she could say it without being ashamed, if the council wished for her reassignment as the deputy major, she would comply. Soul would be upset, but she was confident the next deputy major could bear the burden and love and treat Fabletown just as well. She had already fixed the major flaws in the system, so the new deputy major wouldn't have it hard.

She was ready for that new chapter in her life. She was ready to tear down her routines and hand over the position in order to be with Soul. It was time for her to be happy outside of her job as well, and that happiness was something she wasn't willing to let go. It was as if for centuries she living on repeat, waking up, working, eating, working some more before she went to bed to just be repeated the next day. Now when she took a chance and it paid off, Soul brightened her day and gave her just as plain life as the mundys' colour. Soul helped her feel emotions she hadn't felt in centuries, helped her feel excited and energized about the tomorrow and what the future held. She was beyond happy and excited and she simply couldn't give it all up. She simply couldn't go back and pretend her life was as mundane as the mundys' and forget everything she felt, forget she ever loved Soul.

She was ready. Ready to let the life she lived crumble if it led to that.

Their footsteps echoed in the underground pass way and the torches decorating the wall barely lit up the dense darkness. The voices of the council were distant in the corridor, but she knew, Soul could hear every word of it and it might be the reason behind his tense state. She didn't need night vision like Soul to know his jaw was tense.

The light at the tunnel peeked through the darkness and soon the members of the council came into view. And the Witching Well.

"There. We have all arrived," Justin spoke. "Now we can start the meeting."

"Impeach her!"

"She can't be trusted!"

"Where's the Crooked Man when you need him?"

"Crooked Man?!" Soul roared. "It was that scumbag who put you in this position to begin with! All Maka has done is cleaning up your mess you made when you made deals with him!"

"Our mess?" Giriko chuckled as if Soul's words were amusing. "We only did what we had to do to survive because while you and your puppy lived the good life, we were left without a job, surviving day to day."

"Soul!" Maka hissed at the growl escaping his lips. "Please everybody, stay calm, this is not a matter to raise your voice about."

"Why not? There's nobody who trust you and your government," Kim said from across the room, keeping her arms crossed over her chest. "Do you think just giving me a job would make me forget how you both destroyed my tree, the only thing I had left of the Homeland?"

"Are we going to go through this again? You were making illegal glamours and assisted criminals," Maka simply answered.

"We both know the punishment didn't fit the crime! Justin and Giriko and the others worked beside the Crooked Man and they were given amnesty when they both should've―" Kim's voice came to an abrupt ending when Jacqueline pulled at her hand, slowly shaking her head.

"I'm very sorry Kim." Maka let go of Soul's hand and took a step forward. "I wronged you and I apologize for that. All I have every wanted for you― for all in Fabletown is to be happy."

"I can see that." Tsubaki who had quietly stood by her husband said. "You have done so much for me and Black*Star. You've helped both of us finding real jobs and ended our debt. During Crooked Man's era, we lived in fear of when he would demand our repayment, but now, we don't have to be afraid anymore. Doesn't that count for something?"

"Totally! Like, Maka's awesome, but not as awesome if the big me would've been deputy major!" Black*Star puffed out his chest.

"Okay everybody, let's return to the subject at hand." Justin raised his arms to calm down the situation. "We have all gathered here today since there is a conflict of interest and Maka has gone against the work policy of Fabletown and therefore needs to be impeached―"

"Let her speak!" Soul roared and immediately Maka raised her arm, quieting him down. His hot anger radiated from his body and if she touched him, she was sure she would get burned.

Justin sighed heavily. "Very well, what's your defence?"

"My work as your deputy major is proof enough my affection for Soul isn't hindering my judgment."

"In my ass! She's the reason why my club is failing!" Giriko sneered.

"I gave the girls who didn't want to work there an opportunity to find a different job. The few girls left at Pudding and Pie are committed and has chosen to do their job of their free will without the influence of the magical ribbons."

Giriko blew a raspberry and murmured under his breath. "There's not so much business with just three girls."

"And you could better your club and hire willing girls who love dancing and please their clients." Maka cleared her throat. "What I'm trying to say, I'm not perfect. I made the wrong call burning down Kim's tree. I make mistakes and I try to correct them as well as I can. I love Fabletown. I love being your deputy major." She faced Soul and reached her hand toward him. He was by her side in an instant and entwined their fingers. "But I also treasure Soul. I know I can be professional and separate my feelings from Soul when needed."

"I think we should allow this." Tsubaki beamed toward them. "Maka helped found Fabletown and was in the government and worked her way to the top. There is no one more dedicated to her work than her. She has been professional up to this point and I trust her to manage to separate her love life from her job."

"Thank you Tsubaki," Maka whispered. She could do this. She could win over the members of the council. She could actually stay together with Soul and keep her job.

"I'm not quite so sure." Joe the woodsman crossed his arms over his chest. "I'm confident Albarn can keep things clean and professional, but what about him?"

"What about me?" Soul supressed a growl and the barely restrained anger left traces in his voice like footprints in sand. Maka squeezed his hand, offering him strength.

"You're so… feral. You beat the crap out of a witness for information. You do whatever you wanna do whenever you wanna do it. Who says you will be able to keep things professional."

"Yeah!" Mosquito screamed from beside Giriko, waving his one arm frantically and cheeks already red with anger. "You ripped off my arm for no fucking reason―"

"You engaged in a fight with the sheriff!" Soul snapped back.

"So what? It doesn't mean I had to get my fucking arm ripped off!"

"You also threatened me for information," Giriko pitched in. The tension only rising and Soul's hand tightened on hers to the point it was shaking and her bones painfully ground together. "You fucking punched me in the face."

"You held back information about the murder case!" Soul sneered.

This was going badly. Anger was fuming from Soul and reeking the whole chamber worse than a rotten fish forgotten in the sun for weeks. Soul could barely contain his anger. The little self-control he possessed keeping his feral part under control was failing him.

Giriko blew a raspberry and smirked a wide shit-eating grin toward the two of them. "Come on. Isn't it obvious? Our little pretty princess here could barely contain him when he was just her colleague. There's no way she will be able to keep him on a leash now, and you know what will happen when he messes up, she will defend him and cover it up so her dear little pet won't get in trouble."

Maka's eyes widened with realization. He was doing this on purpose. He knew Soul was holding onto his last line of sanity. He wanted him to snap.

"We all already know he will do anything whenever he wants to get between those long legs of our little princess―"

"No Soul―" It was as if she could hear the last chain keeping him together snapping and he launched toward Giriko. His hand gripped Giriko's throat and Soul pushed him backwards meters until Giriko's back collided with the rocks of the Witching Well.

"What are you doing?!" Mosquito burst out as the wind from the brawling men took his hat away.

"You want to play thug guy, huh?!" Soul violently shook Giriko by the neck, his upper back threatening hanging over the Witching Well. "You insult Maka, you insult me. I'll fucking dump your corpse into Witching Well after I've ripped your head off!" His saliva sprayed over Giriko's stunned but satisfied face.

Black*Star and Justin aided the situation and ripped the bloodthirsty Soul from Giriko. Maka was left in awe staring at his blazing red eyes and his much sharper and defined wolf teeth taking its place, arms hairier than ordinary and nails longer and sharper than humanly possible. He… he had really intentions of killing Giriko. Right in front of all of them. This… this person— borderline beast— hadn't been acting like this during the Crooked Man case. In her presence, he behaved. He did what he was asked to do. He brought the Crooked Man in for justice, waited for her to finish the ceremony at the funeral. He was good, kind and caring, this wasn't the person she knew and grew to love.

Then again, did she even know him at all? His past was of a wolf, a murderous wolf who had feed on bigger and stronger enemies than himself and he had grown into the humongous wolf he was. His true self was of a wolf, he had said so himself. He was simply a wolf in human clothing.

"It's settled." Justin announced as Maka dejectedly stared into the void. "The relationship between sheriff Soul Eater and deputy major Maka Albarn is inappropriate and a threat toward Fabletown. You have till dawn to decide, if you will stick together, Maka will have to resign as deputy major."

She was left transfixed on the spot as the other fables slowly left the chamber. Tsubaki apologetically offered her a comforting brush on her shoulder and Giriko grinned a wide shit-eating grin that could only be describe as "I got you".

The familiarly heavy footsteps echoed in the chamber and he came to a stop in front of her. "Sorry." The familiar heavy combat boots stepped into her vision and her eyes wandered up to meet his apologetic ones. "I just…"

"You just what?" she growled under her breath. "Retreated back to violence again? Thought scaring them would make it all better? What were you thinking?"

Soul flinched and his eyes lowered. "I'm sorry. I thought it would work."

"When has violence ever solved your problems? You just gained strength by feeding on your enemies and what happiness did it bring you? Nothing." she sneered and roughly shoved her index finger on his chest. "You just threw us away a minute ago. You retreated back to your shell of solitude and fear and now you will have to walk the walk because I need a partner!"

"It wasn't that bad." Soul steered away her finger. "We can still solve this problem. You can overrule their decision. You're the fucking deputy major—"

"I'm a deputy major, not a dictator!" Maka shouted.

"But there are still ways. Like… ugh…" Soul scratched his head. "We can't quit our jobs, but… um… there's gotta be a way."

Maka's heart broke. She… she had been willing to quit her job for him. Walk away from her career and actually start a life with him. For once in her life, she didn't want to live for her work, she wanted to live for someone. But he… he didn't want to live with her. He… he wasn't no longer the Soul she partnered up with during the Crooked Man case.

She swallowed down her hurt. "It's over."

Soul's rambling came to an end and his eyes widened. "You don't mean that."

"I do." She nodded, sorrow starting to knot at her throat. She needed to get away as soon as possible. "I don't need a feral boyfriend. I need a civil boyfriend who can keep his emotions in check." She turned around and left him in the Witching Well Camber.

[catcomixzstudios]

How To Life Chapter 39 - Hinduism

How About An Old Faith That Isn’t Dead?

I want to be very clear that I have exceedingly little personal experience with Hinduism (outside of maybe the occasional slightly racist depiction in old cartoons). Why bother trying to explain these things if I’m not personally affiliated with them, you might ask? Several reasons: 1. Mythologies and religions are really fascinating to me, 2. Even if my knowledge is limited, I want to offer as many religious options as possible for you readers to examine in order to learn about yourselves, and 3. Because I find it hilarious when an ignorant white kid desperately tries to understand several-thousand year old cultural ideas, religion, and history to then abridge it and laugh awkwardly when he has no idea what the hell’s going on.

Hinduism is considered one of (if not THE) oldest living religion on Earth. As in, it’s something that people still actively practice and believe in. I really joke at the expense of Egyptian mythology, but that’s way easier to do when everyone who practiced it is long dead. I know that I clearly love taking cheap-shots at ideas and faiths that I clearly don’t understand, but I will admit that I do have respect for the culture and history behind these faiths (regardless of whether or not I have any actual belief in the spiritual stuff). If I were actually to go into tons of detail about all of this stuff, I can’t even imagine how long this damn book would be. The stuff behind these faiths in just plain interesting, and were I someone who actually has any business talking about it, I’d LOVE to give a more serious understanding to you all.

However, this book exists largely for the sake of comedy and vague guidance. I have enough respect for you to know that you can tell this isn’t a completely accurate telling of this faith.

In terms of actual details of the faith, it’s a massive collection of various Indian cultures, ideals, practices, rituals, cosmology, and various other buzzwords for a proper religion. Think of it as a sandwich of Hindu culture, made up of bits and pieces of countless ingredients. You probably would have quite a hard time eating this metaphorical sandwich.

Name just about any aspect of life, and there’s some part of Hinduism that could help guide you along. Whether it’s what duties you should complete, how to balance out your very existence, how reincarnation works, or just interesting ways to have sex, there’s some part of Hindu faith for it. Hardly surprisingly that people are still taking bites out of this ever-lasting metaphorical sandwich.

The meal won’t be complete, however, without learning about the gods and the crazy shit they get up to. Now, being that Hinduism is such a massive collection of various ideas brought together, there are tons of different interpretations of the stuff in their cosmology based off of what sects any person might be a part of. Basically, get ready for branching paths.

The beginning of the universe came about through: A. A giant golden egg. B. The limbs of some dude who was sacrificed to the gods. C. Vishnu (one of the most important Hindu deities) diving into the waters of the cosmos and finding Earth at the bottom (probably next to a band-aid).

Another option is that Brahma (another super important Hindu deity) was sitting around alone in the universe. He decided to make a husband and wife for the sake of company (because I guess he likes being a third wheel). Wife fucked off, however, and Husband chased after her. Wife cleverly changed into various animals who are then had sex with by Husband (thankfully also as that animal) which resulted in many species coming into existence.

Regardless of which path you take, Brahma is generally considered the “Uber-God” for most types of Hinduism. He’s got four heads and is responsible for four of the most important Hindu texts (the Vedas). Fun fact; his main mode of transport is a swan.

The second of the major god trio is Vishnu. He has four arms, each holding a different important object/metaphor. He works as the protector to Brahma’s creation. Fun fact about Vishnu; he’s got blue skin. No word on whether or not he receives any worship from the Smurfs.

Filling out the main Hindu gods trio is Shiva, the destroyer. Depending on what version you follow, his personality is a tiny bit different. Some see him as being super chill, living on Mount Kailash and spending time with his wife and kids. Others see him as being totally OP, choosing to spend his time killing the shit out of demons. Either way, he still finds time for yoga and art.

In reality, there are more gods, demi-gods, local gods, and reasonably important spiritual beings than you can shake a non-metaphorical sandwich at, but those three are the most major ones. Most also have a bunch of different forms that they go through. It’s ALOT to keep track of and most different sects of Hinduism don’t even agree on who’s the most powerful or who even does what when sometimes.

The last aspect of Hinduism that I’ll briefly mention is the afterlife. Unlike most western faiths that focus on a single afterlife, Hinduism involves lots of reincarnation and rebirth. Mainly that you get to spend time in a “good” world for being a swell fella or a “bad” one for being a not so swell fella (and eventually making trips back to Earth). After enough run-throughs of these good, bad, and Earthy lives, you’ll hopefully eventually reach the ultimate understanding of the universe and get to spend the rest of eternity with the supreme god. Basically, you’ve really gotta work for salvation when it comes to Hinduism.

GOOD IDEAS:

- One of the oldest faiths, so it comes with tons of material.

- Covers just about every single detail of life you could want.

BAD IDEAS:

- Finer details are harder to pin down as you cross the boundaries of different sects.

- Too many afterlives IMO. I think I get the point after like the 4th one.

LIKELIHOOD OF TRUTH: ~60%. Being arguably the oldest living faith on Earth gets you some points, but the amount of divisions that have happened over time also hurt it a bit when it comes to figuring what is true. A good choice if you enjoy history and a challenge, however.

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[pinelife3]

What is a labyrinth for?

I've been reading House of Leaves for the last ~7 months. I'm interested, but not engaged: all those months of toil and I'm still only 300 pages in (it is really tempting to just read the Wikipedia summary). The book is about a house which is bigger on the inside than on the outside. People find a mysterious passage which leads to endless hallways, rooms leading to more rooms. An expedition is mounted and the group spend close to two weeks exploring the insides of the house's walls. It takes them four days to descend a staircase. They never find the outside, the house never ends. And as the story goes on the house becomes increasingly hostile and it’s driving people crazy, floors are spontaneously opening up and swallowing unsuspecting alcoholics down into bottomless pits.

Throughout the book (or, really, throughout the bit I've read so far - haha how many book reports have been authored by people who have only read a fraction of the book?) there are lots of references to labyrinths and their purpose. Such a cool word - what's the meaning of 'lab'? Labyrith = misspelt start to labia? That would be interesting. Fingers crossed that that's an upcoming twist in HoL. Okay: the etymology - Online Etymology Dictionary:

c. 1400, laberynthe (late 14c. in Latinate form laborintus) "labyrinth, maze, great building with many corridors and turns,"figuratively "bewildering arguments," from Latin labyrinthus, from Greek labyrinthos "maze, large building with intricate passages," especially the structure built by Daedelus to hold the Minotaur, near Knossos in Crete, a word of unknown origin.

A word of unknown origin... Spooky. They go on:

Apparently from a pre-Greek language; traditionally connected to Lydian labrys "double-edged axe," symbol of royal power, which fits with the theory that the original labyrinth was the royal Minoan palace on Crete. It thus would mean "palace of the double-axe." But Beekes finds this "speculative" and compares laura "narrow street, narrow passage, alley, quarter," also identified as a pre-Greek word. Used in English for "maze" early 15c., and in figurative sense of "confusing state of affairs" (1540s). As the name of a structure of the inner ear, the essential organ of hearing, from 1690s.

This is definitely irrelevant, but in Homer, Odysseus’ stock epithet is ‘cunning’ - the first lines of The Odyssey are: “Sing to me of the man, Muse, the man of twists and turns.” Is this twists and turns because he’s cunning and able to confound people with his ‘figuratively bewildering arguments’ - or is this twists and turns because he’s a terrible navigator and we’re about to hear all about his epic, decade-long journey home from Troy?

Anyway, kind of feels pointless to tell the story of the Minotaur and his labyrinth because you definitely already know it, but just briefly:

Tale as old as time, True as it can be, Blah blah blaaaah  Beauty and the beast

After some funny business between Poseidon and Minos (the king of Crete), the queen (Minos’ wife - and also the daughter of Helios, the sun) falls in love with a bull which was originally given to Minos by Poseidon under the proviso that he (Minos) would sacrifice it to honour Poseidon (sweet deal). Anyway, the queen is totally besotted with this bull and decides she wants to kick things up a gear sexually so she has Daedalus (of wax wings fame) make a hollow fake cow so she can get banged by the bull (what could go wrong?). She winds up pregnant and gives birth to the Minotaur - the queen tries to raise him right but he is savage. Because he’s a monstrosity, he had no natural food source and settles upon humans as his food of choice. 

Minos commissions Daedalus to build a labyrinth (I presume the Cretan royalty had some kind of family discount plan) and they shove the Minotaur in there. Why didn’t Minos just kill the Minotaur? The oracle at Delphi said not to. Plus, I guess it might have upset his wife a bit. Why didn’t Minos just kill Daedalus? That’d be too easy. It seems like at the core of most myths there’s a kernel of morality tale:

For Daedalus: just because you can doesn’t mean you should - be more careful about the stuff you build. And don’t enable bestiality 

For Minos: don’t sass Poseidon

For the queen: typical Greek stuff - all women (even the daughters of the sun god) are depraved liars with bizzareo sexual leanings. Even though it was a curse from Poseidon that gave her those impulses, her shame echoes through eternity (which is weirdly her only cosmic punishment - besides, I guess, being separated from her one true love, the bull... actually, I’m not sure what happened there. One assumes that after the Minotaur thing she decided to hit the brakes on her relationship with the bull but maybe they grew old together, lying in the sun in grassy pastures for the rest of their lives)

If you were hoping that this was the only tale of lady/bull romance from ancient Greece, you are shit out of luck. In another story from Crete, ya boy Zeus takes a fancy to a woman named Europa. Rather than woo her using any of the conventional means, Zeus transforms into a huge white bull and abducts her, taking her to the island of Crete. She becomes Crete’s first queen and has some kids with Zeus - it’s unclear whether this goes down with Zeus in bull or human form. It transpires that one of the kids born from Europa’s affair with Zeus is Minos. So Minos’ mother and wife both had unsavoury relationships with bulls. 

That was a long detour - getting back to the Labyrinth: it was built in Crete to house the Minotaur. The idea was that the Minotaur would never be able to escape, and that anyone who entered the Labyrinth wouldn’t be able to escape either. Why not just lock the Minotaur in a prison? Doesn’t have the same ring to it, I guess. It’s a weird idea though, isn’t it - making a really complicated (but still solvable) puzzle and putting something you never want found or freed in it. Why not just make something actually unsolvable?  

So that’s the first/most famous labyrinth. Herodotus, a Greek historian who was kicking around in the 5th century BC also wrote about one in Egypt. He wrote a book called Histories which Wikipedia bills as the founding work of history in the Western literary canon (I initially misread this sentence and thought that they were saying it was the founding work overall and I was about to be all ‘ah, beaucoup problemo, Wikipedia.’ But a quick reread saves me from from making an embarrassing mistake). ANYWAY, in the second volume of Histories, Herodotus recounts his travels around the far flung and exotic land of Egypt. According to Herodotus:

This I have actually seen, a work beyond words. For if anyone put together the buildings of the Greeks and display of their labours, they would seem lesser in both effort and expense to this labyrinth… Even the pyramids are beyond words, and each was equal to many and mighty works of the Greeks. Yet the labyrinth surpasses even the pyramids.

Ancient Origins dot net says:

It was named ‘Labyrinth’ by the Greeks after the complex maze of corridors designed by Daedalus for King Minos of Crete, where the legendary Minotaur dwelt. Yet today, nothing remains of this supposedly grand temple complex – at least not on the surface. The mighty labyrinth became lost to the pages of history.

It was actually a mortuary temple, not a labyrinth in the traditional sense of looking like a maze, but it was sprawling, complex and difficult to navigate.The only other Greek historian to see it was Strabo. He was kicking around ~500 years after Herodotus but also reported that the labyrinth was pretty crazy, calling it a “great palace composed of many palaces.” He said:

[I]n front of the entrances are crypts, as it were, which are long and numerous and have winding passages communicating with one another, so that no stranger can find his way either into any court or out of it without a guide.

Apparently the temple was lost over time - Wikipedia is blaming Ptolemy II (who apparently married his sister so that gives you a sense of his respect for preserving the integrity of things like historical sites and the integrity of blood lines) for its ‘demolition’ but he died in 246 BCE so, if he’d destroyed it, how would Strabo have been able to see it in the 1st century CE? It may not have been completely destroyed - it sounds like they perhaps just removed a bunch of limestone columns and blocks.

Fast forward to 1888: a British archaeologist named Flinders Petrie is excavating the site - of his findings he writes: there was nothing but a “vast field of chipped stone, six feet deep... All over an immense area of dozens of acres, I found evidence of a grand building. From such very scanty remains it is hard to settle anything." Petrie also apparently found a bunch of papyrus scrolls - including some which contain parts of the Illiad!

So there was definitely something there. Imagine this though: people found Herodotus’ writings ages ago and are searching around in the sand based on 2,000+ year old testimony from a man who many of his contemporaries considered at best a gullible exaggerator and at worst a liar. 

There was an expedition in 2008 - they have a website talking up their geophysic surveys of the area but they might not have found much because the results page of their website was never completed.

There’s a really weirdly specific Wikipedia article dealing with the (figurative) presence of the Minotaur in HoL - obviously some HoL superfan wrote this article (and it is interesting) but I don’t know why it warrants its own stand alone article - it’s not unusual to have a separate article discussing the themes and motifs of a major text on Wikipedia, but this is a whole article discussing a single motif. ANYWAY I like the analysis in the article about how if the house is the labyrinth, the Minotaur is the awful thoughts that crowd around you as you explore the endless hallways - obviously these are different for everyone. SO the Cretan labyrinth was built because Minos didn’t want to kill the bull - that was its purpose. What is the purpose of the labyrinth in the house? (That’s really why I’m still reading.)

UPDATE: have given up on House of Leaves - it’s on the bookshelf and never coming off. I am a quitter. Feels amazing.

[inevitable--storm]

Prompt

Yeah, well, I shut everybody out. Don't take it personally. It's just easier.

word count: 2546 words

authors notes: This is my first time writing something like this like ever. It didn’t turn out like I thought it would but here I am. Please note that English isn’t my native language so excuse any spelling or grammar mistakes I’ve made. Also: if you are uncomfortable with some angst, this might not be for you. I hope you’ll enjoy.

There you are. Sitting in a corner inside of a ridiculously huge building, absolutely overwhelmed by the incredible amount of people surrounding you, not even knowing how exactly you ended up in your current position. Why were you even kidding yourself? You knew university would be hard and you'll be surrounded by immense crowds every single day, be pushed to your limits all the time and under pressure pretty much the whole time. You knew you most likely won't be satisfied with most of your grades because the expectations you have for yourself are exceedingly high. But deep down you still thought you could handle it well enough. You’re continuously trying to prove yourself. Not to others, but to yourself. You wanted to do better. Yet somehow you ended up where you are now, being dangerously close to a breaking point.

Suddenly something comes into your field of view. Rather, somebody than something actually. It was probably the most handsome guy you've ever met. And for some peculiar reason he was standing right in front of you. You slowly glanced up, just a little, your eyes still slightly watery. ‘Hey, are you alright?’ he questions. You don't respond at first, not noticing that he was addressing you. But when he speaks again, he's looking directly at your face. ‘It's fine, you don't have to stop whatever you were doing just to check on someone you don't even know’ you respond. Silently muttering an 'At least I guess it´s fine’. ‘It's not like you're interrupting anything. My professor called in sick, so my class won't take place today. Also: I actually do know you. We're in the same maths class, remember?’ he shrugs. ‘And why would you spend your precious spare time with some random person from your maths class when you've got better stuff to do?’ you snap at him still upset by recent events. ‘Wow easy there. Anyways... Would you like to get something warm to drink?’ he replies unbothered by your little meltdown. ‘Listen. I appreciate your efforts. But why don't you just go and do whatever you wanted to do before you saw me sitting here and for some inexplicable reason decided to talk to me?’ you answer not ready to give up your alone time. Nonetheless he stays persistent and you end up agreeing to go to that damn coffee shop with him just to get back in your comfort zone as soon as even possible. You had already finished your last class of that day anyways.

The coffee shop was close to the science department of the university, so it was a short walk. And basically all of it was filled with an awkward silence. You were still caught up in your thoughts of desperation, going through the day’s events over and over again. You had no idea why he didn't try to introduce a conversation, but you're glad he doesn't since you don't see any point in small talk and are exceptionally unskilled at it. Maybe he is just being nice not wanting to interrupt your thoughts. The two of you soon arrived at said coffee shop. When you entered you searched for a spot to sit and he wanted to know what he could get you. ‘I don't like coffee, like at all, so it's just whatever’ you state resigned. He chuckles in a deep and pleasant tone at your response. Lifting an eyebrow you question ‘What is it?’. ‘Nothing, I'm just more of a tea-person myself’ he states still chuckling slightly amused by the face you made ‘for your information they do serve tea in this place.’ ‘I wouldn't know I never go here. But in this case I'd get some sort of fruit tea.’ While he leaves to order something for the both of you, you try to calm yourself down still questioning why you even agreed to this in the first place. You are taking some deep breaths when he returns to your spot setting down the tea in front of you. ‘You still haven't answered my question from earlier’ he suddenly says.'In fact I did. I told you I was fine.’ you say shrugging, trying hard to pretend that your words were true, while putting excessive amounts of sugar in the tea sat in front of you to cover up your nervousness. ‘I meant the truth you know’. You fall silent at that for a second. No one at university ever cared enough for you to even greet you let alone ask about your well-being. Granted you didn’t really care to interact with anyone since you are more of a loner. Your introversion didn’t help either. And there he was, asking how you really felt. The truth is you feel exhausted, you have for a while now. With all those assignments and lectures you’ve been extremely stressed lately. You’ve got so much to do that you didn’t have time to be stressed about everything you had to do. When you didn’t receive the grade you hoped for in the most recent physics exam you didn’t know how to cope with it. You had studied hard for that test and understood everything that was being tested just fine. But you had such a bad day on exam day that you confused two issues and that cost you plenty of points in the rest of the exam. You didn’t even fail the test, you just knew that you could do so much better causing you to be highly dissatisfied with yourself and desperate. You couldn’t tell him any of this. What if he uses it against you or will gossip about it? Even though he doesn’t seem like a person who’d do such things. But you just can’t get yourself to tell him. Instead you just go with ‘It’s going to be alright’ to give him at least a somewhat honest answer. Why are you trying not to scare him of though? You never really care what most people think about you. Why would he be different? ‘You’re not going to be any  more specific about this, are you?’ he sighs at your response. The question, more rhetorical than anything else, is hanging in the air for some time. When he seems to decide you’re not about to tell him more about your situation, he changes the topic and begins to chat about your majors. Luckily something you’re comfortable talking about. You learn that he’s majoring in robotics and learns plenty of stuff about artificial intelligence which explains why you share a math class, even though your major is chemistry. After an hour or so you excuse yourself because you ought to get back home now otherwise you’ll most likely fall behind in your assignments. When you tell him goodbye you decide to thank him for spending the afternoon with you.

On your ride back home you can’t get him out of your mind.

 You’re early for math class as always and except for 5 other students the only one in the auditorium. You definitely prefer 8am classes others since you’re an early bird. Due to the fact that the room is basically empty you’ve got free seat choice. You settle for your usual spot in second row. From there you can see everything pretty well, the chance of tall people sitting right in front of you is extremely low and you won’t be distracted by the backbenchers doing everything but paying attention to the class. You set up your materials for class and when you check for the time and notice you’ve got at least 15 minutes until class starts you decide to work on a practice task that covers the subject of today’s class. The auditorium starts to fill soon but when you check he’s nowhere to be seen. Maybe he’s sick or something. When there’s only one minute left until the class starts you hear the door slamming shut. After that follows a muffled sound and a row of swears. You notice that the voice sounds somewhat familiar. And when you check it’s him. You try not get too excited and internally scold yourself for hoping he’s looking for you. Then someone drops their stuff in the seat next to you. Your heart skips a beat since you always sit by yourself. When you see who it is it skips yet another one. It is in fact him. He smiles at you what seems a bit shy and while he greets you he places two hot beverages on the desk. ‘It took them an eternity to get those ready at the coffee shop. Almost thought I wouldn’t be able to make it’.  You were about to greet him as well when the professor starts the lesson. He silently slides you the second cup and you give him a tiny smile in return mouthing a thank you. As always it was a busy class so you were occupied with work the entire time. When it’s over there’s barely time left to get to your next class. He was just getting up and it seemed as if he wanted to start a conversation. With you stuff already packed you throw your backpack over your shoulder. Rushing out of the room you mutter a silent ‘Thanks for the tea. Have to leave for my next class asap’.  

 Soon it became a ritual that he’d always bring you some tea. You feel guilty though because he probably spends tons of money for it. At some point you start bringing little snacks to make up for it. Despite your little ritual you barely talk to each other. You keep telling yourself that it’s for the best. If you’d let him in further he’d presumably realize that you’re nothing but a mess. One that couldn’t deal with any sort of pressure and disappointment properly. And you want to avoid that at any cost. And even if that wouldn’t bother him there would be another problem.  You’d worry about disappointing him too. Who are you kidding? You already do.

And of course your struggles wouldn’t disappear magically. You still had difficulties hiding your disappointment in yourself when you didn’t do as well as you wanted to. And it became worse when the actual exams were coming soon. You’re close to having a break down with all the things you have to study, even when you started a month in advance. You probably look like shit.

Your strain resulted in the fact that you interact with him even less. The lack of interaction made you think you fucked things up with him. Still trying to tell yourself that it’s better that way. Yet at some point he seemed to decide to give it another try. One day he managed to catch you at the library where you spend quite some time studying. You don’t notice him at first which is why you jump when someone is suddenly touching your shoulder. When you notice it’s him you let out a relieved sigh. ‘You scared the hell out of me!’ you accuse him. ‘I didn’t think you’d be so jumpy’ he tried to defend himself. ‘But I’m sorry for scaring you. What are you up to?’ ‘What does it look like to you? The exams are close so I have to study’.  ‘Mind if I join you?’ ‘Whatever pleases you’ you shrug. So the two of you start studying together in silence. At some point he asked you about a topic he apparently missed because he was sick when it was covered. You try your best to explain it to him since explanations aren’t exactly what you’d call your strong point. He gets it really quickly though which secretly makes you suspect that he lied about missing that class. At 7pm you start you get hungry and tired. When notices your stomach growling he offers to get some food. ‘I should probably head home. I’ve still got some stuff to do.’ But for some reason that remains hidden from you he keeps insisting you’ll eat with him. When you tell him you’d rather eat at home he offers to eat at his place. Deciding that he won’t take no for an answer you agree.

 When you arrive you notice he lives in the same street. You don’t know why this surprises you so much. Just because you’ve never seen him around doesn’t mean he wouldn’t live here. You never leave your apartment when it isn’t necessary so it shouldn’t be surprising. When you enter his flat you luckily don’t have any trouble orientating since yours is pretty much the same. At least as far as you can tell. You got Asian take-out on your way here and start eating almost immediately. ‘Oh no!’ he exclaims followed by a silent swear when you’re halfway finishes with eating. You give him a confused look. Then he offered you something to drink and kept apologizing for not doing so earlier. You told him it was alright and that you didn’t really want something anyways. ‘But you have to drink something. I didn’t see you drink for at least two hours’ he insists. You give in and he gets up to get you something.

After you finish you sit at his table without talking. That’s until he speaks up. ‘Do you mind if I ask you something?’ ‘You just did. But it kinda depends on what you’re going to ask. But why don’t you just go ahead and I’ll tell you if I’m comfortable answering it or not’. He takes a deep breath before asking: ‘Why do you shut everybody out? I mean I really care about you and sometimes it feels like you’re finally letting your guard down but then you are pushing me away again. I just want to understand. From what I’ve seen you’re an amazing person and extremely intelligent as well. I want to spend more time with you but keep backing away’. This hits you. He isn’t wrong you are backing away from people if they are getting closer to you. You still feel like you owe him an answer. He told you that he cares about you and you have absolutely no idea how to deal with this. ‘Yeah, well, I shut everybody out. Don't take it personally. It's just easier’ you say in a soft voice that is barely more than a whisper. ‘But why?’ That’s when you can’t hold it in anymore. You don’t even know why. ‘Don’t you get it? I’m an absolute mess!’ you say desperately. ‘But so are most people. So am I. You don’t have to feel bad about yourself’ he responds softly taking your hands in his. ‘Please let me try and show you that you’re worth it’ he continues leaving your moth gaping. ‘I need some time though. You can’t expect me to change immediately’ you say slowly. ‘It doesn’t matter how long it takes you. I’ll give you all the time you need. I’ll be waiting for you because you are definitely worth the wait’. You give him a soft smile when you hear his words. Then he pulls you into what is perhaps the warmest and most comforting hug you’ve ever received. And maybe, just maybe, things are going to be alright.