#student groups anaheim

[laurenairay]

comes back to me, burning red - F. Andersen

Summary: Kendra Lee and Freddie Andersen lost touch after he was traded from Anaheim – will a surprise encounter bring back their friendship? And maybe more?

I’m jumping in as a pinch hitter for @misshoneyimhome for @callsign-denmark’s Luck of the Puck fic exchange! I haven’t written about Freddie in a little while so it was fun getting back to him – and thanks for answering all my questions! Such a lovely twist of fate after receiving my own fic from her today.

Flashback sections are in italics.

Words: 7.9k

Warnings: discussion of Freddie’s injuries, light angst, friends to lovers, cheesy flirting

Title from: Red by Taylor Swift

~

“Good morning Kendra Lee!”

Kendra grimaced, shutting the door to her yoga studio behind her, her long blonde hair swinging as she turned.

“Full name, first thing in the morning? What did I do?”

Her colleague and friend, Mimi, just snickered, shaking her head.

“Nothing bad, I promise,” Mimi said, smiling.

“Still ominous,” Kendra mused, swiping her staff card to log her as present in the building, “What’s going on?”

“Okay so you know how you moving over to Raleigh with me a month ago was to give you opportunities to do more yoga rehabilitation work?”

“Yes…?”

It was true, as vague as her friend was being. Having worked across yoga studios California for nearly 11 years, Kendra had jumped at the chance of diving more into rehabilitation work within yoga. Being made co-owner with Mimi and her sister Celeste was just the cherry on top.

“I was staying late last night to finish up the stock check and I got a call – specifically for you to do yoga rehab for an athlete needing conditioning to make his way back to playing. I know it’s right up your street, kind of exactly what you want to do more of, so I said yes.”

“You said yes already?” Kendra asked, surprised.

“I know, I know, but this is a huge opportunity. I said yes, with the caveat that I would double check timings with you this morning and let them know your availability for today,” Mimi explained.

“For today?” Kendra gasped.

“Yes, I know, but the guy organising it all for the athlete was insistent – the athlete chose you, off a list of yoga instructors based on feedback from other clients you had, and that’s huge,” Mimi said, wincing in apology.

Kendra took the time to think over her friend’s words, throwing her long blonde waves up in a twisted bun, her typical work hairstyle.

“You’re right. That is huge. Surprising, but huge. I guess, uh, just see what I’ve got this afternoon? I know I’ve got a couple of classes this morning already,” Kendra eventually said, “including…damn it, one that start in 15 minutes.”

Pregnancy Yoga, affectionately known as Moms who Move. Not women to mess around.

“Alright, you go get set up and I’ll call them back. Thanks, Kendra. And sorry for it being so last minute,” Mimi smiled.

“Hey, it happens. Let’s stay positive with it!” Kendra grinned.

As sudden as the work was, it really was where her heart lay, so this could only be a good thing right? Everything she’d been working towards?

“That’s the spirit I love! Get it girl!”

Kendra just laughed her way into Studio Two, her usual room, ready to make sure her class was set up in time.

By the time the afternoon rolled around, Kendra was pleasantly tired. All three classes had run smoothly so far today and there had been no major hiccups (or incidents) with any of her students. Even the Grooving Grandmas class (the adorable name her group of 12 senior ladies gave themselves) had behaved today, which only left her in a great mood.

So great, she lost track of time, until Mimi poked her head into the room.

“Hey, Kendra, your 2pm is here.”

“Oh damn, the athlete?”

“Yeah that’s the one. I’m just finishing up his intake forms if you want to join us,” Mimi said with a smile.

Kendra smiled back, nodding as she followed her friend out to the front desk. If she was being honest with herself, she would’ve liked a bit more preparation time, or even a name to start with. Hell, even the sport the athlete played in would’ve been useful, so she could start thinking of a program for them. Hopefully the athlete would understand the last minute nature of the set up. Hopefully.

But standing there in the lobby was the last person she expected to see. Just as tall and gorgeous and imposing as she’d last seen him in Anaheim, before he left over 7 years ago. He was her athlete?

“Freddie?”

“It’s been a long time, Kendra,” he murmured, smiling.

“You two know each other?” Mimi said, confused.

~

“How are your teaching hours coming along? You can’t have many left now before the next level, right?”

Kendra smiled up at her boss brightly. After her initial 200 hours training, she knew that teaching yoga was going to be her life’s work, even though she was only 21. Having worked insanely hard over the past two years, she was nearly ready to lead classes all by herself rather than as an assistant, and wasn’t that a heady thought? “No, not many left at all. As of yesterday I actually have 990 hours logged.”

“So you’re nearly ERYT 200?” her boss, James, grinned.

The third level of yoga instructor, after two years and 1000 hours of teaching.

“Just 10 hours left!” Kendra said brightly.

“That’s kind of perfect, if I’m being honest. We’ve been contacted by the Anaheim Ducks to run a conditioning class for a portion of the team. There are 20 players who’ve signed up, and the idea is that those who find it useful will sign up for more classes.”

“20 ice hockey players. My God. Will they take it seriously?”

She’d seen plenty of jocks in her 21 years and she knew exactly how much they goofed around when they didn’t care about things.

“Oh yeah, this is mandatory for these players and I’ll be evaluating them to send it back to their trainers. It’s serious – and it’s a big opportunity for the studio too.”

“Yeah definitely. And it’ll be good to see a different type of client for a change,” Kendra nodded.

“We love our yoga moms, don’t front,” James mused.

Kendra just grinned. She did love her beginner’s yoga mom class, he was right.

“It’ll be a big opportunity for you too, to work with them. If enough sign up, I’d like you to take on at least one for solo instruction the moment you have those 1000 hours done, to give you that experience. But if any of them give you any trouble, you let me know, okay? I won’t stand for it, regardless of who they are.”

“Thanks boss.”

“Any time.”

By the time 11am rolled around, Kendra was nervous. Not a bad nervous though, more like butterflies. She was so closed to her next stage of yoga teaching that she could almost taste it. She just hoped that this giant group of giant men would be a positive experience. They arrived in a herd, filling up the room quickly, and Kendra waited at the front of the room off to the side while her boss waited for them all to be ready.

“Alright, thanks for joining us today. I’m James Fields, owner and lead yoga instructor here, and this is Kendra Lee, who will be running this class alongside me,” he started.

She just grinned at the curious looks sent her way. Let them underestimate her, that was fine.

“As you all know, this class is mandatory and I will be evaluating you for your conditioning staff, so pay attention and we’ll all have a great time.”

Kendra watched a few disgruntled expressions popping up and fought not to laugh. Hockey players. She should’ve known they wouldn’t be any different. As her boss continued to talk, Kendra’s eyes drifted across the room, eventually landing on the man in front of her. Well, man was pushing it – this guy couldn’t be more than a couple of years older than her. A broad-shouldered redhead, pretty face, serious expression taking in her boss’s words. This one was paying attention. This one wanted to learn. Good. Even from here she could tell he would tower over her, although at 5ft2 that wasn’t really a difficult barrier. Maybe 6ft4? Maybe? Either way, this guy was going to be a good student, she could already tell.

As if he could sense his eyes on her, the man glanced over, catching her gaze. She froze, a little embarrassed to be caught staring, but he just smiled. Oh what a lovely smile that was. It was all she could do to smile back.

“If you’re all ready then, Kendra will lead you through Sun Salutation to warm up.”

She broke out of her thoughts, waving cheerfully at them all and earning a laugh. “I’ll be gentle, I promise,” she grinned.

~

“Yeah Freddie used to come to classes at my first studio, back in Anaheim about 10ish years ago. It’s been a while,” Kendra nodded, forcing a smile on her face.

Mimi raised an eyebrow but smiled politely at Freddie. “If you head on into Studio Two, Kendra will be right with you. I just need her to sign a form.”

He nodded, following the instructions with a smile sent Kendra’s way, leaving her alone with her colleague.

“Okay what the hell was that?” Mimi asked, wiggling her fingers in the direction Freddie went.

Kendra sighed, hands on hips.

“That was an old friend who I haven’t seen or spoken to in over 7 years. Him coming here out of the blue just threw me off, that’s all.”

“Is he going to be a problem? Because I have no issue with kicking him out if he doesn’t deserve a moment in your company,” Mimi said firmly.

It was times like this that Kendra really loved her friends.

“No, no it’ll be okay. There was no drama, we just drifted out of contact. Sure it sucked, but it was a long time ago? It’ll be fine. Besides, like you said, this is a big opportunity for me to do more with yoga rehab, right?”

Mimi pursed her lips but nodded. “Alright, if you’re sure. But let me know the second that you change your mind, if you need to.”

Kendra just gave her a quick hug, nudging her friend’s hip with her yoga mat, before heading resolutely towards Studio Two.

~

“So you enjoyed the last group class then?”

“I did. Anything to keep my flexibility up as good as it can get, right?”

Kendra just smiled, nodding. “Not that you seemed to have a problem with your flexibility.”

“Well I certainly haven’t had any complaints.”

He froze the moment the words left his lips, looking mortified. It was all she could do to burst into laughter at the horror on his face.

“I am so sorry. That was so unprofessional,” he groaned.

“Honestly, I don’t think I’ve laughed so hard since I’ve started here,” she said, still giggling, “You have nothing to worry about Mr Andersen.”

“Please, call me Freddie?” he asked, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly as his cheeks flamed red.

“Sure thing. Now let’s talk solo session scheduling – what works best for you?”

~

Kendra took a shaky breath as the memories of her first solo yoga session with Freddie washed over her, before steeling herself, pushing open the studio door. Freddie was sitting cross-legged in the middle of the floor on the mat he’d brought with him, and immediately smiled up at her, loosening a bit of tension in her chest. She could do this. She could totally do this.

“Hey, Freddie,” she said, unrolling her own mat.

“Hey Kendra. It’s good to see you,” he replied as she sat down opposite him.

“Good to see you too. I won’t say it isn’t a surprise because that would be a lie, but it is good to see you after all these years.”

Freddie winced a little, making her grimace inside. Was that too much?

“About that…”

He trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck, so Kendra quickly shook her head. Their past wasn’t what this was all about, and it would do neither of them any good to hash it up now.

“You’re here now,” she said firmly, “So, yoga rehab. Do you know much about what it entails or if there’s anything your team specifically wants?”

“Uh, I only know the basics really. Obviously I’ve done it a lot before for conditioning, which is what my trainer said this mostly will be as my injury was a blood clotting issue rather than muscles or joints?”

Blood clots. Damn. And for someone only in their 30s?

“That must’ve been really scary,” she murmured.

His eyes widened a little in surprise, but he nodded, smiling sadly. “I genuinely thought my career was over. I’ve been out for stretches of time before, but never for anything like this. I felt…helpless,” he admitted.

She could only guess he was being so vulnerable because of their history but she still appreciated his honesty. It can’t have been easy to admit such a thing.

“I can imagine you would, yeah. But the team are figuring it out, right? They wouldn’t be signing you up for yoga rehab if they didn’t have a plan in place?” Kendra said, trying to be positive.

“Yeah, yeah you’re right. They’ve tried a few things and they seem to be happy with the results anyway – they’re looking at about a month if all goes well,” Freddie nodded.

“That’s fantastic. I’m glad I’ll be able to help you get back to where you need to be. I’ll do a bunch of research after today, to make sure I’m not pushing you too hard, to make sure I’m doing the best I can for you,” Kendra said, smiling.

One month. One month with a rehabilitation she’d never come across before. This was the exact kind of challenge she wanted – and it would be with Freddie?

“I know you will, Kendra. I trust you completely. I just…”

He trailed off, chewing his bottom lip, his hesitation making her chest ache.

“What is it?” she prompted, trying to be gentle.

“I don’t want this to be it. I’m not ready for my career to be over. I still want, no, need to prove myself,” he said softly.

“Your talent and reputation precede you, Freddie. Everything that you’ve achieved with the Leafs and now with the Canes? How beloved you are by teammates and fans? You prove yourself, every day.”

“You’ve followed my career?” he asked, clearly surprised.

To be fair, she didn’t think she would’ve been able to keep following him after he left Anaheim, but it was Freddie.

“How could I not? We were friends,” she shrugged, trying to keep her voice light.

A wave of sadness washed over Freddie’s expression, making her heart clench in her chest, but before he could speak, Kendra cleared her throat.

“You’ve got this, Freddie Andersen. We’re going to get you back to where you need to be, and you’re going to kick metaphorical ass. Maybe even literal ass if you need to,” she said firmly.

Freddie managed a small smile, nodding.

“Let’s do this then.”

~

“Hey, Kendra. Thanks for today. I really enjoyed the session.”

She looked up at Freddie as she took her hair out of the twisted bun she put it in for working, letting her hair cascade down her back in blonde waves.

“You don’t have to thank me every time, you know,” she mused.

After that fateful first group class, Freddie has eagerly signed on for more conditioning classes at her studio, and her boss had happily signed him on as her first solo yoga client the moment she reached her 1000 hours milestone. It had been intimidating, if she was being honest, but she was thriving under her own steam, leading all on her own. It didn’t hurt that Freddie was a willing student, keen to increase his flexibility and core strength. And it didn’t hurt that he was absolutely gorgeous either – but that was just for her own thoughts.

“I want to thank you though. The team, management in particular, are really noticing the work I’ve put in as full-time backup, and that’s all down to you,” Freddie said with a shrug and a smile.

“Well in that case, gold star for me,” she grinned.

Freddie barked out a surprised laugh, making her giggle as she rolled up her mat.

“Did you, uh…do you have any more classes now?” he asked, awkward enough for her to pay attention.

“No, you were my last of the day. Why?”

“There’s a new smoothie bar that’s opened up down the road and I was going to go after this – if you want, come with me? I’d love to learn more about how you got into yoga instruction so young,” he said hopefully.

Kendra eyed him for a moment, trying to read any implications or anything untoward in his words. The last thing she wanted was to give off the wrong impression, especially in her first adult job, but Freddie just looked so genuine that she couldn’t help but to smile. A friend couldn’t hurt, right?

“I could go for a smoothie,” she said after a moment or two, nodding.

“Great! Um, I’ll shower, change, and meet you in the lobby?”

“Sounds like a plan,” she mused, “See you soon.”

Within no time at all, Kendra had changed into a cute little cropped lilac sweater and black jeans, leaving her hair down her back to dry in waves. She hadn’t packed any makeup with her, annoyingly, but Freddie saw her all the time without makeup so she guessed it didn’t really matter. Even if she would’ve preferred a dashing of mascara and a swipe of lipgloss. Maybe she’d have to leave a spare of each in her work bag, just in case any future hangouts after work happened.

If today’s smoothie run wasn’t awkward, of course. Damn she hoped it wouldn’t be awkward.

“Ready to go?”

“Let’s do this!” Kendra said cheerfully.

Freddie just smiled down at her, easily towering over her 5ft2 frame with his 6ft4 one – yes she’d looked up his height to be certain, she was curious – opening up the door for her to walk through first.

“Such a gentleman,” she teased.

“I aim to please,” he drawled.

Kendra snorted, immediately covering her face in embarrassment, but Freddie grinned like a cat who got the cream.

“Cute snort,” he smirked.

“Ass,” she shot back, sticking out her tongue to let him know she wasn’t actually mad.

Freddie just laughed, a clear beautiful sound that sent butterflies in her stomach going overdrive. No, this was not the time. Be a professional. Don’t be a giggly idiot. Damn it.

The walk to the smoothie bar couldn’t have taken more than 5 minutes, the two of them staying in a comfortable silence – something that Kendra found difficult with people she’d known for years, so for her to feel such at ease with someone she barely knew? It was strange. Nice, but strange.

“Okay, what’ll it be?” he asked, looking up at the board, “My treat.”

“Are you sure?” she frowned.

Sure, this was her first job and she’d only been in it a couple of months, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t pay her way.

“Absolutely sure. I insist,” Freddie said firmly.

The intensity in his eyes, warm but solid, made her inhale sharply and nod. If he insisted…

“I’ll have almond milk, pineapple, kale, and mango, with a dash of honey. Thanks, Freddie,” she said, smiling up at him.

He just smiled back down at her, sending those butterflies into overdrive again, stepping forward to repeat her order as well as giving his own. When their smoothies arrived, Freddie walked over to a table in the corner so she followed, sitting down with a happy sigh.

“Oh man that’s good. Thanks for inviting me out,” Kendra said, after taking a sip of her smoothie.

“You’re welcome. It’s nice to actually meet someone near my age that as interested in yoga as I am,” Freddie said simply.

“Yeah? Not too many friends or girlfriends wanting to join you?” she asked, somehow managing to stop herself cringing to hard at the wording of her question.

Freddie just smirked slightly but didn’t call her out, thankfully. “No friends who want to do yoga with me, no. Most the team only do yoga when they absolutely have to. And no girlfriend either.”

“That’s a shame,” she said lightly, ignoring the zing through her body, “Yoga is fun and a great stress-reliever.”

“Is that why you got into it then?”

Kendra relaxed back into her seat, taking another sip of her drink, before starting to talk. Over the next hour, the two of them exchanged life stories, getting to know each other properly. Freddie talked about his career so far in the Danish league, how different and difficult it was to move over to Anaheim in August, how he’s just trying to make his mark now he’s been with down with the AHL team most the season and only up for a week. In turn, Kendra talked about how she’d always lived in California, having moved from her hometown in Santa Monica to Anaheim after meeting her now-boss at a training course, how she’d seen her mom doing yoga with her friends and fallen in love with the flow and peacefulness of it as well as the strength it gave. Talking to Freddie felt like they’d been friends for all her life, something she’d never experienced before, and she could only hope this wasn’t the last time they got to do this. Freddie was special, that was clear as day, and she felt lucky to see this relaxed side of him that she doubted many were privy to.

Eventually though, once their smoothies were finished, they had to leave before they overstayed their welcome, and Freddie walked her back to her car.

“I’m perfectly capable of walking across the parking lot on my own, you know,” she mused, jerking her chin in the direction of his car, all the way on the other side.

“And if some weirdo stalks you to your car when I can prevent that, I’d rather avoid you being alone,” he shrugged.

“Aww are you my knight in shining armour, Mr Andersen?” she teased.

Interestingly, his cheeks dusted with a blush.

“I’ll sweep you off your feet any time you need, Miss Lee,” he smirked.

Kendra just burst out laughing, shaking her head at his banter flirting. Ridiculous guy. This was going to be a fun friendship, she could already tell.

“Give me your number? We can sort out another smoothie run,” Freddie said, smiling.

She ignored those traitorous butterflies and nodded, unlocking her phone and handing it over. It could only be a good thing to have more friends in Anaheim, right?

“You think you can handle seeing me outside of the yoga studio?” she mused.

“Oh I know I can.”

~

Kendra and Freddie settled on three yoga sessions a week for his rehabilitation, 12 in total, to give him the conditioning build up he needed while still taking care to manage his recovery. She’d spent all night after that first meeting researching and planning the best course of movements and flows for him, making it challenging but helpful, eventually dragging herself back to bed at 4am, satisfied that what she’d planned would help him.

With any client, she would want to make sure she was satisfied, but with Freddie? She needed it to. Even after everything, she didn’t want to let him down.

Their first two sessions went well, the first mostly easing Freddie back into the swing of things, assessing where his strengths and weaknesses were, and the second session left Freddie groaning but smiling, happy he was able to push himself. Their third session, which Kendra was preparing for, would be another mild push, nothing extreme but still to see where she would need to adjust any plans.

It was all a process, but one she was enjoying immensely. Not just because of her student.

“Knock knock.”

Kendra jolted out of her thoughts, hand on her heart as Freddie walked into the studio with a grin.

“You are the worst,” she groaned.

“So you don’t want the smoothie I picked up on the way?” he mused.

He brought her a smoothie?

Her lips parted in surprise, but she stuck her hand out anyway, Freddie just laughing as he passed it over. The moment she took a sip, a wave of nostalgia ran over her. All she could think about were the smoothie runs and coffees hangouts and even the occasional lunch they used to go to together. Two and a half years of memories all flooding through her system, and it was all she could do to keep her face calm and neutral as the memories of conversations and vulnerability and laughter swirled through her thoughts. This wasn’t fair. This really wasn’t fair. She wanted to be mad at him for daring to dive back into their past like him leaving meant nothing, but how could she? How could she be mad when those memories still brought her joy?

“Almond milk, pineapple, kale, and mango, with a dash of honey. My favourite. Maybe you’re not the worst. You really remembered this?”

“Of course I did. I loved our smoothie dates,” Freddie nodded, smiling.

Dates?

“Dates?” she said, raising an eyebrow.

“Figure of speech? I don’t speak English?” he offered.

“Yeah nice try, I’m pretty sure your English is better than most people I know,” Kendra mused.

Freddie blushed but laughed.

“How could I forget anything about the girl who got me doing the best Bridge pose of my life, hm?”

She tried valiantly not to think about how good Freddie looked bent over in a backwards arch. Valiantly.

“Alright, but don’t think this means I’ll go easy on you, Freddie,” she said brightly, “We’ve still got a lot of work to do.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” he grinned, “Give it to me rough.”

Kendra took a moment, trying to hold in her laughter, before she gave in and cackled.

“Oh man that was so bad, even for you,” she grinned.

“Not my finest, I’ll give you that,” Freddie shrugged, a light blush on his cheeks, “Still made you laugh though.”

Well he wasn’t wrong there.

Kendra sipped on her drink while Freddie laid out his mat, leaving the cup in a safe spot as she moved to stand in front of him.

“As always, let’s start with Sun Salutation,” she grinned.

The next hour flew by. As she promised him, Kendra did push him hard – some of the poses he wasn’t quite ready for, she could see that, at least even for the length of time they were trialling today. His natural flexibility hadn’t left him, that much was obvious, but there was still work to do. At least she could take pride in being part of rehabilitation that would never push him further than he was ready for. His safety, physical and mental, was the most important thing.

But he could do this. She knew that he could do this, and that excited her.

“Alright, that’s us done for today. Thanks, Freddie,” Kendra said softly.

Freddie opened his eyes, practically floating from savasana, face flushed from exertion.

“Thank you, Kendra. I feel awesome. Tired but awesome,” he grinned.

“Not aching too much anywhere?” she asked, standing up gracefully.

Freddie groaned as he stood up, rolling his shoulders as he checked in with himself. Kendra smiled wryly at the action – at least she could trust an athlete to know his own body.

“No, not too much,” he said.

“Are you sure?” she frowned, hands on hips.

“I promise. I know the difference between aching from a good workout to aching from injury and pain. This is good,” Freddie insisted.

Well alrighty then.

“That’s what I like to hear,” Kendra said happily, rolling her neck from side to side to loosen tension, “Take a shower, Andersen, I can smell you from here.”

Freddie barked out a laugh, shaking his head in amusement.

“Care to join me?”

“In your dreams.”

Freddie just smirked, sending a shiver down her spine. There. That was it, the spark she’d been missing for so many years.

“See you on Wednesday?”

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Freddie nodded.

~

From: Freddie I have a return date March 7th

From: Kendra That’s amazing! I told you that you could do it! These last eight sessions have really paid off! Do you feel ready?

From: Freddie As always, I should’ve trusted that you were right lol I think so? My body does for certain

From: Kendra And your mind? If you don’t feel mentally ready, Freddie, please don’t let them push you

From: Freddie Thanks, I appreciate that I think it’s more nerves than not mentally ready? Like, I don’t want to let the team down. And I don’t want critics to call me washed up

From: Kendra You could never let the team down They can see your passion, see how hard you’re working And screw the critics. They don’t know you or your body You are the furthest thing from washed up, so don’t talk about yourself like that

From: Freddie I’ve missed your fire. Yes ma’am

From: Kendra Damn right you have. That’s more like it

From: Freddie Can I still finish off my course of session with you? And maybe carry on for a few more afterwards? Just to make sure I still have that confidence?

From: Kendra As many as you want I’m here for whatever you need

From: Freddie Whatever I need? I like the sound of that

~

“So today’s your last official yoga rehab session with Freddie. How are you feeling?”

“Yeah, it’s all gone really well. It’s been nice reconnecting with him, as well as seeing him grow back into his conditioning and confidence. You were right, Mimi, this was a great idea,” Kendra grinned.

Mimi and Celeste both smiled at her, but the smiles quickly turned hesitant. What? What was wrong?

“Has he said something? Have the Canes said something?” she asked, starting to worry.

Had she done something wrong and he hadn’t had the guts to tell her?

“No, no, god no. Freddie’s had nothing but high praise for you since he got here and I have no doubt he’ll be saying the same to his team,” Celeste said quickly.

“He talks about me?” Kendra asked, not knowing whether to ignore the butterflies in her stomach or not.

“He does. And he always has a smile on his face when he leaves here, same as you. We just…”

“Just what?” she prompted.

“We just want you to be careful,” Celeste said, finishing her sister’s sentence.

 What the hell?

Mimi winced at Kendra's expression before clearing her throat.

“When I met you, it was obvious that part of you was missing,” Mimi said softly, Celeste nodding.

What?

“What do you mean?” Kendra frowned.

“This fun flirty side of you? These beaming smiles? It’s great, don’t get me wrong, but seeing you around Freddie makes so much sense,” Mimi explained.

Okay that was crazy.

“We really are just friends,” Kendra said, shaking her head.

Mimi and Celeste send her matching disbelieving looks.

“No, really,” Kendra said, shrugging, “We always had this flirty banter but it was never anything more than that.”

“Never anything more?” Celeste said, raising an eyebrow, “Not even once?”

“No!” Kendra laughed, “He would come to my yoga classes, we’d get coffee or smoothies occasionally, sometimes lunch, but never anything more.”

“I really don’t think you see what we see. What no doubt everyone sees when they watch the two of you,” Mimi said.

“You can’t fake that kind of chemistry, Kendra. He clearly has feelings for you,” Celeste added.

What?

He had feelings for her?

And everyone saw it?

Mimi and Celeste watched her obvious turmoil with soft pitying smiles.

“Think about it. Just think about it. That’s all we’re saying,” Mimi said, her voice warm and reassuring, “And be careful?”

“You’re our girl, okay? We just want you to be happy,” Celeste said, smiling.

“Uh yeah, sure. I’ll think about it,” Kendra murmured.

It was all she could do to walk in a straight line for their staff kitchen, desperately needing a cold bottle of water to sip on while she sorted through her thoughts.

She’d always found Freddie attractive. That was something she could admit to without hesitation. But it was something she’d buried deep, knowing she could never act on it. Bringing that acknowledgement back up to the surface was terrifying, because it wasn’t just a physical attraction – it was everything about him. If she let herself think about how attracted she was to him, let herself think about his laugh, and his kindness, and his terrible taste in coffee, and his soft smile when he talked about his family, and literally everything else about him…she felt like she would explode.

How was she supposed to behave normally around him in their last scheduled yoga session, when all of these dangerous feelings were bubbling at the surface?

No, she had to find a way. She couldn’t ruin everything, not when she’d just got him back into her life. She just couldn’t.

Somehow, she managed to keep a lid on her emotions for her entire day until Freddie’s session at the end of her evening, running through the most challenging routines that pushed him to his limit, but left him with a smile on his face. He was ready. He was really ready for his return to play in two days time.

So why did it feel like everything was ending?

Freddie had stayed mostly quiet, focusing on his movements, but there were times in between flows that she caught him staring at her as if he was thinking. Thinking hard. It was almost off-putting, if it didn’t make her feel giddy. Were her friends right? Were her feelings really reciprocated?

Whatever was going through his mind, she didn’t know, but even she could feel a trembling intensity between the two of them that she couldn’t put a finger on. It felt like…anticipation.

When their class was over, Freddie insisted on waiting for her to grab all of her things, Mimi and Celeste just smirking as he waved goodbye to them, escorting her out to her car. This time he apparently hadn’t parked that far away from her, so he was insistent on walking her properly, although it could definitely be classed as more of an extremely slow stroll rather than a walk.

Like he was drawing this out as much as she was.

“You must be freezing,” Freddie murmured, “Here take my jacket.”

Before Kendra could form a word of protest at his sudden words, Freddie was slipping his jacket off and placing it over her shoulders. The warmth immediately hit her body, thrumming through her veins, and she knew without a doubt that her burning cheeks gave her thoughts away.

“There. Better?”

It was all Kendra could do to nod, staying silent as Freddie made a grunt of approval. Why was this affecting her so much? It was a just a jacket. It was just a jacket, right? It didn’t stop her sinking into the warmth though, picking up the scent of his cologne, ignoring the way her heart started beating that little bit faster.

She had to say something. She had to say something.

“Freddie…I need to ask you a question,” she said softly.

“Go for it,” he mused.

“Did you know it was me when you agreed to do a yoga rehab course?”

“What?”

Kendra exhaled a little shakily, but shook her head. She needed to know.

“When your team suggested yoga classes as part of your rehab treatment plan, how did you pick a teacher? Did you know I would be running this for you?”

“Ah.”

A single word. How ominous.

But Kendra just stayed silent, unwilling to say anything else before he did. She needed to know. It would change everything.

“The team gave me a list of options, with short descriptions about the teacher and any feedback from other clients. And…the moment I saw your name on the list, I didn’t have to think any further or look at anyone else,” he murmured.

“What?”

Freddie let out a shaky breath, halting his walk, so Kendra stopped next to him. What did he mean by that?

“I took it as a sign from the universe that I finally had a chance to make up for letting our friendship fizzle out. You were one of the best parts about Anaheim for me, and I was so wrapped up in my head in Toronto that I was stupid enough to let our friendship go. To let you go. I wanted to see you again. I knew that you would be amazing from the yoga side of things, but to get the chance to say that I’m sorry? I couldn’t pass that up.”

As he spoke, his words clear and his expression more serious than she’d ever seen, her heart started racing like it never had before. He really meant all of that, didn’t he? He really chose her?

“You have nothing to apologise for,” she eventually said, a little more breathless than she would care to admit.

“Yes, I do,” Freddie replied, huffing out a laugh, “You deserved better than I treated you.”

He looked relieved, like her being mad at him was even a possibility (not with them, never with him), but she just shook her head. Yeah, it had hurt at the time, when she finally resigned to losing contact with him – but that was over 7 years ago. With time, that hurt had faded into an ache, which in turn faded to occasional wistfulness. She could never hold a grudge against him for a trade, and certainly not for following his dream. That just wasn’t who Kendra was.

She started walking again, Freddie wasting no time in joining her, even though their steps were practically glacial in speed.

“Maybe I deserved a little better communication but it was so long ago, Freddie. I’m not holding onto past grudges. And honestly, the fact that you chose me because you wanted to reconnect? That’s all I needed.”

“Really?” he asked, voice hopeful.

“Really really,” she grinned, “Although I’m sure you can think of something to make it up to me.”

A grin spread across Freddie’s face too, making her feel a little giddy.

“Anything you wanted, Kendra Lee.”

“That is a dangerous offer, Frederik Andersen,” she shot back.

He just shrugged, grin not leaving his face. “You know I’m good for it.”

This, these flirty exchanges, served to do nothing other than light her blood on fire. Why was it always so easy to slip back into this with him like nothing had changed? That was a good thing, right?

“Come out with me on St Patrick’s Day night,” she blurted.

He raised an eyebrow, looking unimpressed, but she just laughed.

“I’m going to a karaoke bar with Mimi and Celeste – join us,” she explained.

“That’s what you want? Out of all the things you could’ve asked for…you want me to join you for karaoke,” he said incredulously.

Kendra inhaled sharply at the implication in his words but nodded anyway, hoping she wasn’t making a huge mistake.

“I do. It’ll be fun, to see you outside of work, and to do something with you that we’ve never done before. We already have a little booth booked and it’ll be better than cramming into a regular bar for St Patrick’s Day,” she said firmly.

He laughed softly, shaking his head in disbelief, before eventually nodding.

“Alright, I’ll be there. Text me the address,” he mused.

Kendra just grinned, ignoring the butterflies in her stomach as they finally reached her car.

“Thanks for lending me your jacket, Freddie.”

“Any time.”

~

By the time the evening of the 17th March rolled around, Kendra was buzzing. She'd not seen Freddie since his debut back on the ice, him having given the three of them tickets to say thank you. Watching him win? It was everything, and she couldn't have been prouder of him. But with his schedule and hers, he hadn't scheduled any more classes like he'd said he'd wanted to, so Kendra had been limited to text messages, hoping that her daydreams weren't just silly fantasies.

Kendra, Mimi, and Celeste had been in O'Malley's for an hour, and Freddie still hadn’t arrived. The longer that time went on, the more disappointed she felt, not wanting to believe that after everything they’d regrown between them that he would just ghost her. No, that wasn’t Freddie. It couldn’t be Freddie.

“Breathe. Have a drink. He promised he’d be here, right?” Celeste said with a sweet smile.

“He did. But that doesn’t mean he couldn’t have changed his mind,” Kendra sighed.

“Hey, no sad faces. It’s St Patrick’s Day and we’re having a good time!” Mimi said cheerfully.

Kendra just groaned, taking a big gulp of her beer, her friends just cheering. They were right. She couldn’t dwell on this. If Freddie was going to come or whether he wasn’t, she was still out with her friends to have a good time. That was what she needed to focus on.

“Up next, Kendra singing Red!”

“Ooh girl that’s you, go!” Mimi squealed.

Kendra took a deep breath to steel herself, sliding out of their booth with a confident smile. If anyone could make her feel better, it would be Taylor Swift, she knew that much. As the intro music starting playing, she focused on letting it flow through her, tapping her foot in time with the beat.

“Loving him is like driving a new Maserati down a dead end street, Faster than the wind, passionate as sin, ending so suddenly, Loving him is like trying to change your mind, Once you're already flying through the free fall, Like the colors in autumn, so bright, just before they lose it all.”

As if summoned by magic, the door to the pub opened, and Freddie walked in. Within seconds he saw her standing on the karaoke stage and stopped in his tracks, offering her a small stunned smile. He came. He didn’t ghost her. Freddie actually came as she asked him. That had to mean something, right?

“Remembering him comes in flashbacks and echoes, Tell myself it's time now gotta let go, But moving on from him is impossible, When I still see it all in my head, In burning red, Burning, it was red.”

She found herself pouring her emotions into the words, pouring everything she felt about Freddie into the song, not able to take her eyes off him. By now, Mimi and Celeste had noticed how she was performing just for Freddie – she could see their grins from across the room – and a few other patrons were starting to notice too. But she couldn’t stop herself. Her body felt almost out of control, singing her heart out to the only man who’d ever truly held it.

“Oh, losing him was blue, like I'd never known, Missing him was dark gray, all alone, Forgetting him was like trying to know, Somebody you never met, 'Cause loving him was red, Yeah, yeah, red, Burning red.”

His eyes were almost wild, locked onto her like she was the only person in the room. It was a heady feeling, giving her the confidence she needed to finish the song with a smile.

“And that's why he's spinning 'round in my head, Comes back to me, burning red, Yeah, yeah.”

She curtseyed dramatically to cheers and applause as the song ended, a wide grin on her face, and she moved to step off the stage, Freddie was already there with a hand extended to help her down. She took it silently, inhaling sharply as Freddie didn’t let go – instead her guided her across the room to the bar, the crowd parting with whatever intensity was on his face, so much so that they were served immediately.

“Two baby guinnesses,” Freddie asked politely.

The barman just laughed, nodding as he poured the shots, Freddie not letting go of her hand even as he paid for their drinks. He passed her one of the shots with a hopeful smile, the sweetness in his eyes intoxicating, so she clinked the glass gently with his, the cool liquid sliding down her throat smoothly.

“I wasn’t sure if you would make it,” Kendra said, offering him a small smile.

“I was thinking. Thinking about a lot of things. And I have something I need to say,” Freddie murmured, voice barely audible above the rumble of the room’s conversation.

“Oh?” she said, breath caught in her throat.

“I need to be honest with you, Kendra. I don’t think I can do any more classes with you.”

Oh. Everything in her chest felt like it was crumbling, Kendra barely able to get a breath in.

Wait, what?

“It would be incredible unprofessional of me,” Freddie added.

“Unprofessional? Freddie, if I’ve done something-”

The last thing Kendra was expecting was for Freddie to cut off her words with a kiss.

And not just any kiss. A toe-curling, melt into his arms, curl her fingers into his shirt kind of kiss. As his hands cupped her face and his lips moved with hers, it was all she could do to let out a soft little moan, interrupted only at the chorus of cheers and whistles around them. Freddie broke the kiss with a soft laugh, Kendra just feeling dazed, but his shy smile just made her giddy all over again.

“I’ve wanted to kiss you for so long. I just didn’t think I could,” he admitted, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

They were right. Mimi and Kendra were right.

“What changed?” she managed to ask.

“We changed,” he said. “We’ve both grown so much in ourselves since I left Anaheim and I am proud of both of us for taking what we need to make ourselves happy and successful. But I don’t want to lie to myself any more, thinking that I don’t need you too.”

“You need me?” she said, surprised.

“I do, in every way. I was an idiot for so many years, Kendra. I don’t want to waste any more time,” he said seriously.

“Jesus, Freddie, knock a girl for six why don’t you,” she said, huffing out a laugh.

He froze at her words, clearly fearing the worst, but Kendra just grinned. How could she be anything but excited?

“I’m yours, Freddie Andersen. I always have been,” she said happily.

The smile that spread across his face was worth a thousand lifetimes. This was what she had been waiting for. Exactly this.

“Now, buy me another drink and sing a song with me, and I’ll consider kissing you again,” Kendra grinned.

He laughed in disbelief but grinned so widely in response that it made her giddy. “One blue moon pale ale, coming right up.”

Her favourite girls night drink? How did he remember everything she’d ever said?  They were really doing this. They were finally doing this. 

“You’re going to be trouble, aren’t you?” she laughed.

“Probably. You love it though.”

That she did.

[shutth3puckup]

jamie drysdale is dating/has a situationship with kelsey millar whom he met at stagecoach when he was there with cam york & trevor zegras last summer. kelsey was on dance moms with brynn rumfallo and they do a podcast together. on their podcast they told a story about meeting trevor and jamie at stagecoach and they essentially pretended they were college students and then ditched the girls once the girls figured out they were NHL players. jamie follows both of them still, trevor doesn't. also on their podcast they said that jamie and kelsey were trying to go on a date (this was early fall ish). kelsey and brynn went on a trip to socal in october (they live in arizona). brynn has made multiple shady tiktoks referencing trevor and dixie... she's really bitter that she fumbled and he dropped her and got with dixie instead.

katie ortencio (tyson foerster's gf) followed kelsey last week when jamie, katie, and the flyers group were all in mexico together. kelsey posted a pic of her at the flyers game in philly on thursday night on her story (sitting with katie) and katie reposted it to her story. brynn posted a tiktok dropping kelsey off at the airport with the audio "get that dick bitch".

jamie has also been on a following spree of influencers/raya girls since he arrived in philly (he was doing the same when he was still in anaheim but it ramped up when he got to philly). the flyers were in florida earlier this week (playing the panthers) and he followed a girl from the area and was strategically liking her pics. over the past few weeks he's been liking kelsey's pics but other girls pics as well.

Heard she’s been at a few games in Philly and was sitting in the wag area. The distance between them would make it easier for him to be on Raya, and who knows exactly how serious they are/ how it will be now they are on opposite sides of the country. It’s not easy, and if they aren’t too serious it could be too much. Have to see how it plays out

Edit:

I have been told she was not on dance moms.

[wilderhockey]

nhl teams as school clubs/student orgs

the result of a 15-minute conversation with lil @wymgreenteam this afternoon. based specifically on our experience in hs (also note that I’ve been out of hs for four years now so some of this might be misremembered but whatever it’s about the vibes).

this is not necessarily kind to all (or really any) teams but it is light-hearted and in good fun.

I put it under a readmore because 32 teams is a lot of teams

~

anaheim ducks: theater (actors specifically) - dramatic as fuck. loud as fuck. endearing in spite of it [see sharks/kings]

arizona coyotes: not a club. they’re the guys who show up to school in their tractors from october to march because the weather is fucking terrible and they’ve gotta get there somehow (thanks mn)

boston bruins: key club - self-important for no particular reason. also this is a club where you pay to do community service, which is just fundamentally wrong in the same way I feel when I see the bruins’ meth bear

buffalo sabres: swim team - wet. no I will not elaborate.

calgary flames: garden club - I didn’t even know we had a garden club until lil suggested this

carolina hurricanes: model UN - super well-run, they’ve got some nice kids involved, but I dislike them on principle

chicago I’m not writing out their team name: lacrosse - universally hated except by themselves and often take insults as compliments. also the worst punishment I can think of for a hockey team is telling them they remind me of lax bros

colorado avalanche: empowering women’s club - mostly performative but sometimes (when they can get the whole group together) they do fun things

columbus blue jackets: student section - they’re all college kids sorry it just fits

dallas stars: gender and sexuality alliance - listen. I don’t know what’s going on down there, but I can tell you it’s definitely gay

detroit red wings: cross-country - sometimes the rookies are good but everything else about them is forgettable

edmonton oilers: knowledge bowl - connor mcdavid reminds me of kb kids. leon draisaitl would be that guy who knows fuck-all answer-wise but can hit the buzzer super early and always knows what the question is asking. they just have neatly partitioned tasks for everyone and it sometimes works. yes I did kb for 7 years can you tell

florida panthers: FCA (fellowship of christian athletes) - the combination of donuts and christian rock at every meeting leveled out to a net zero

la kings: theater (tech crew specifically) - black and white outfits and idk sneaky vibes? they feel like a variety show in the same way tech does [see ducks/sharks]

minnesota wild: marching band - they’re dumb. they love each other. pranks are inevitable. some gay shit is happening. the director has very little control

montreal canadiens: magic the gathering club - just some kids hanging out. j chillin. one-sided feud with costco. vaguely hostile but in a blatantly self-defensive way

nashville predators: baseball - they were good for a while one time but now they’re just sad and middling

new jersey devils: speech - it’s fun when you’re not worried about winning, it’s a great group, but the moment you start paying attention to numbers you will cry

new york islanders: volleyball - bitchy vibes. and mat barzal’s tiny shorts

new york rangers: quiz bowl - to quote lil, they “aren’t smart enough for [knowledge bowl]” but also zero teamwork despite individual prowess

ottawa senators: robotics (FRC specifically) - they’re constantly falling apart but when it works it Works. also lots of freaks of many varieties (affectionate)

philadelphia flyers: that one political club a couple of my friends started junior year. pac or something? - it was going fine and then it changed management and now. hm.

pittsburgh penguins: student council - overachievers (affectionate). somewhat ineffective but they’re putting the effort in

san jose sharks: theater (pit specifically) - oft forgotten, but generally chill [see ducks/kings]

seattle kraken: chess club - to quote lil, “good vibes. don’t do anything, just here for fun.” I agree

st. louis blues: choir - rancid vibes. (I was a choir kid I’m allowed to say the vibes were rancid bc they were)

tampa bay lightning: honor society - overachievers (derogatory)

toronto maple leafs: lettuce club - for anyone unfamiliar, this is a club where every year, everyone interested sits at a table and simultaneously consumes an entire head of lettuce. whoever does it fastest is the Head of Lettuce for the next year. I have no fucking clue what they did at the rest of their meetings. leafs vibes

vancouver canucks: anime club - what the fuck is going on over there don’t look pretend you don’t see them and it’ll be fine (affectionate)

vegas golden knights: debate - this is for nolpats specifically I know he’s in LTIR hell but this is for him

washington capitals: that’s just the teacher’s union

winnipeg jets: football - they were never good but people go for the social aspect not the score

[lboogie1906]

Omar Hashim Epps (July 20, 1973) is an actor, rapper, and producer. He has been awarded nine NAACP Image Awards, two Teen Choice Awards, one MTV Movie Award, one Black Reel Award, and one Screen Actors Guild Award. His film roles include Juice, Higher Learning, The Wood, In Too Deep, and Love & Basketball. His television work includes the role of Dr. Dennis Gant on the medical drama series ER, J. Martin Bellamy in Resurrection, Dr. Eric Foreman on House, and Isaac Johnson in Shooter.

He was born in Brooklyn. His parents divorced during childhood, and he was raised by his mother, Bonnie Maria Epps, an elementary school principal. He began writing poetry, short stories, and songs at the age of ten. He attended the prestigious Fiorello H. LaGuardia High School of Music & Art and Performing Arts. He belonged to a rap group called Wolfpack, which he formed with his cousin in 1991.

He married singer Keisha Spivey (2006) from the R&B group Total. They have two children. He has a daughter from a previous relationship. He is fluent in Spanish and French.

Mayor Freeman R. Bosley Jr. (July 20, 1954) was the 43rd mayor of St. Louis and the city's first African American mayor.

He graduated from Saint Louis University with a BA in Urban Affairs and Political Science. He received his JD from Saint Louis University School of Law. While a student at Saint Louis University, he was president of the Black Student Alliance and the Black-American Law Students Association. Upon graduation from law school, he was a staff attorney for Legal Services of Eastern Missouri, specializing in Consumer Affairs and Utility Companies. He has been employed by the law firm of Boast and Jordan.

He was selected as the first African-American St. Louis Circuit Clerk for the 22nd Judicial Circuit. He served as the 3rd Ward Democratic Committeeman. He became chairman of the St. Louis City Democratic Central Association and became the first African American chairman of the Democratic Party in St. Louis City.

He became the mayor with 66.5% of the vote. He oversaw the city's struggle during the Flood of 1993.

He assisted in orchestrating the $70 million bailouts of Trans World Airlines. He helped move the Los Angeles Rams football team to St. Louis from Anaheim. Two property tax increases were passed during his Administration.

He is married to Darlynn and they have two children. #africanhistory365 #africanexcellence

[i-am-brandon]

my life story chapter 12

If you wanted anything else to happen it didn’t probably because of her sister. In school they had Valentine’s Day cards I don’t know if I got 1. Other people dating got 1 not me Ralph Wiggum on the simpsons. Back then at some point there is participation trophies I think I got 1 for bowling, otherwise 1 guy gets a trophy and they hate on everybody else. I don’t think I’m good at bowling I’m pretty sure I got a gutter ball recently and that is when it becomes not as fun. I went to the universal studios theme park back then and I remember seeing in a glass case something scary, it was a Chucky doll, scared me when I was younger also it looked like Chucky hurt his face pretty bad, I think that’s scary to look at it as a younger person, I didn’t see that movie until later, my brother Ryan said to scared younger me if that thing moves I’ll punch it in the face. This 1 guy I don’t remember his name he liked to read scary stories out loud, he said does anyone want to watch it this 90’s clown murderer movie, everybody said no to that he didn’t like it, the group agreed on watching a scary movie about snakes, maybe the movie was called Anaconda the year was 1997. Did I talk about that 1 girl at my school who had an eating disorder, her friends were worried about her not eating enough, younger me didn’t know what an eating disorder was. Or how about that 1 time at school I got called a retard. I would go to Lego land that’s an amusement park about legos. I would go to Anaheim Angels baseball games, I went to a Anaheim Ducks game my uncle Barry didn’t like it when the Anaheim Ducks lost to the Dallas Stars I thought it was a good game. In the 90’s they were called the Anaheim Angels this later got changed to the L.A. Angels in 2016. I remember this 1 guy and i don’t know if it was anger management guy or not talked about inappropriate butt stuff in class about girl’s and he said to me would you do that for your girl, I didn’t know how to respond, i probably said I don’t know. I used to help out in the special ed class, I used to help the teachers babysit the students, it seemed alright because special ed students don’t disobey there minds are too dumb to do so, so that seemed good for babysitting it seemed like, 1 of the students was named Edgar, he would stick out his tongue I don’t think in an inappropriate way and he would play with blocks, and he liked to stack the blocks so he would get 1 one block and put another 1 on top of that and than a 3rd one on top of that block and I would change and Edgar didn’t like he would stack the blocks which I thought was likable, he wanted the blocks to look a certain way, it seemed good to me. Another special ed student liked Thomas the engine it was like a talking train kid show. And than I would go on walks with the special ed students. And that was me helping the teachers with the special ed students, special ed students are pretty easy to babysit they don’t disobey you. The tamagotchi so when I used to play this virtual pet game with my friends, what we didn’t know about the tamagotchi was that it had a way to save the game, and if you don’t learn this your tamagotchi will die no matter what you do, yeah because you would have to sleep at some point and this virtual pet it needed constant care or it would die, so if you don’t save it the game never ends, that’s the only way to pause it and you can’t always play it so your virtual pet would always die if you don’t save the game. We didn’t know that so our virtual pet would always die. Richard had a big squirtle plush doll, squirtle was 1 of the starter Pokémon’s from Pokémon blue. Louis C.K. Was my friend richards favorite comedian, my favorite comedian was Lewis black. My brother Travis likes the dodgers, my uncle Dave likes the dodgers, my mom likes the duke college basketball team, my dad that died of skin cancer liked the Oakland Raider, and my dads friend liked the Denver broncos.

[lenbryant]

(LONG POST) Column: The story behind that Florida school curriculum that whitewashed slavery keeps getting worse

By Michael Hiltzik, LATimes Business Columnist  

(Photo) Marker commemorating the Rosewood massacre of 1923: Can Florida escape its racist past? (Historical Marker Database)

If there’s a bet that you will almost always win, it’s that no matter how crass and dishonest a right-wing claim may seem to be, the reality will be worse.

That’s the case with Florida’s effort to whitewash the truth about slavery via a set of standards for teaching African American history imposed on the state’s public school teachers and students.

The curriculum, you may recall, was condemned for a provision that the curriculum cover “how slaves developed skills which, in some instances, could be applied for their personal benefit.” 

"Dogs and Negroes Not Welcome" — Sign posted until 1959 at the town line of Ocoee, Florida, site of a 1920 racial massacre

Another provision seemed to blame “Africans’ resistance to slavery” for the tightening of slave codes in the South that outlawed teaching slaves to read and write. 

A section referring to “acts of violence perpetrated against and by African Americans” goes on to list five race riots and massacres from American history, every one of which was started by whites. 

More on that in a moment. As the indispensable Charles P. Pierce put it, the Florida standards “look as though they were devised by Strom Thurmond on some very good mushrooms.”

I reported last week on this reprehensible project, which was publicly presented as the product of a work group of the state’s African American History Task Force. 

Two members of the task force, William B. Allen and Frances Presley Rice, responded to the scathing reaction to the curriculum from Democrats and Republicans with a defensive statement purportedly on behalf of the entire work group. 

“Some slaves developed highly specialized trades from which they benefitted [sic],” the statement read. “This is factual and well documented.” 

As I reported, however, of the 16 individuals Allen and Rice mentioned to support their assertion, nine never were slaves, seven were identified by the wrong trade and 13 or 14 did not learn their skills while enslaved. One, Betty Washington Lewis, whom Allen and Rice identified as a “shoemaker,” was white: She was George Washington’s younger sister and a slave owner.

Now it turns out that Allen and Rice were not speaking for the work group, but for themselves. Thanks to reporting by NBC News, we know that most of the work group’s 13 members opposed the language suggesting that slaves benefited from their enslavement.

NBC quoted several members anonymously as stating that two members pushed the provision — Allen and Rice. Members “questioned ‘how there could be a benefit to slavery,’” one work group member told NBC. 

Others said that the work group met intermittently over the internet and did not collaborate with the state’s African American History Task Force, which was created in 1994 to oversee the curriculum for African American studies in Florida’s K-12 schools. 

The work group’s standards were approved unanimously on July 19 by the state board of education, every member of which was appointed by Gov. Ron DeSantis, who is running a natural experiment to see whether bigotry and racism can carry someone to the presidency. 

We’ve recently learned more about Allen and Rice. Allen, as I reported earlier, is a retired professor of political science at Michigan State University. (The university removed his bio page from its website sometime in the last few days, but here’s an archived version.)

Allen served as chair of the U.S. Commission on Civil Rights under George H.W. Bush, but angered civil rights activists and members of the commission itself for taking a stand against legal protections for gay people. 

At a 1989 conference in Anaheim sponsored by anti-gay Christian fundamentalists, Allen delivered a talk titled, “Blacks? Animals? Homosexuals? What is a Minority?”

Its theme was that treating gays and Black people as distinct minorities would relegate them to animal status. Allen said, “My title is as innocent as a title can be,” a position that prefigured his current defense of the Florida slavery standards as no big deal. 

He’s listed as a fellow of the Claremont Institute, which has been funded by a galaxy of right-wing foundations. The institute lists among its senior fellows John Eastman, who is one of the four attorneys identified as “co-conspirators” in the federal indictment of former President Trump for trying to overturn the 2020 presidential election, handed up Tuesday. Eastman is also the target of a California State Bar proceeding aimed at his disbarment for his alleged role in that effort.

As for Rice, she’s chair of the Sarasota-based National Black Republican Assn., which appears to have shared its business address with her home address. She identifies herself as “Dr. Frances Presley Rice,” but she doesn’t appear to have a medical degree or PhD; she does hold a juris doctor degree, but that’s just a law degree and doesn’t customarily bestow the “Dr.” designation on its holders.

Rice has conducted a years-long campaign to associate today’s Democratic Party with the Democrats of the 19th century, a pro-slavery party that shares none of its positions on Blacks or slavery with the Democrats of modern times. 

The normalization of Florida’s slavery whitewash has been abetted by a supine press. On July 27, for example, Steve Inskeep, the host of NPR’s Morning Edition, conducted a servile interview in which he sat meekly by as Allen spewed unalloyed hogwash. 

When Allen suggested that Black journalist Ida B. Wells had drawn “inspiration” from the slavery experience, Inskeep — had he been even minimally prepared — could have pointed out that the Mississippi-born Wells was 5½ months old when the Emancipation Proclamation took effect on Jan. 1, 1863, and 3½ years old when the 13th Amendment abolished slavery. 

Nor did Inskeep challenge Allen about the list of 16 supposed slaves that he and Rice issued in defense of their curriculum. The list had been out for a full week before the NPR interview. Inskeep didn’t mention it at all.

When Allen asserted that he was not the author of the curriculum, nor were any other members of the work group, the proper follow-up would have been: “Who wrote it, then?” Inskeep kept mum. 

The Washington Post, meanwhile, tried to shoehorn Florida’s whitewashing of slavery into a “both-sides-do-it” framework. 

The Post article suggests that the Florida curriculum and President Biden’s July 25 proclamation of a national monument dedicated to Emmett Till, a Black teenager tortured and lynched by a white mob in Mississippi in 1955 for purportedly offending a white woman, are two sides of a “roiling debate” over Black history.

Of course that’s absurd. Most Americans, and most Democrats, don’t see slavery as a topic worthy of reconsideration. That’s all on the Republican side, especially in Florida. 

DeSantis and his stooges are pretending that the truth about America’s racist past should be suppressed for fear of making white children feel bad. It’s nothing but a play for the most bigoted members of the GOP base.

That brings us back to Florida’s curriculum. Provisions other than the one about the benefits of slavery aren’t getting the attention they deserve. 

Take the part about “acts of violence perpetrated against and by African Americans.” This standard is illustrated in the text by references to race riots in Atlanta in 1906 and Washington, D.C., in 1919, and massacres in Ocoee, Fla. (1920); Tulsa (1921); and Rosewood, Fla. (1923) — rampages by white mobs lasting a day or more.

In what sense do these point to violence perpetrated by Black people? Pierce conjectures that they “might distressingly be referring to attempts by the victims of those bloody episodes to fight back.” 

The Ocoee massacre occurred when the town’s Black residents attempted to vote. When a squadron of Klansmen hunted down a Black leader in his home, his daughter tried to prevent them from taking him by brandishing a rifle, which went off, slightly wounding a white member of the gang.

“A volley of gunfire erupted in both directions,” according to an account on the Florida History blog. In the aftermath, nearly 60 Black residents were dead, their community was razed to the ground, and those who survived were driven from the town, never to return. Until 1959, a sign at the town line read, “Dogs and Negroes Not Welcome.”

Is Ocoee supposed to be an example of “violence perpetrated ... by African Americans”? Nothing would speak more eloquently to the true nature of the Florida standards for teaching Black history.

[tuesday7econlive]

The Economical Perspective of Being a Sneakerhead

There is absolutely no doubt that the sneaker market in the United States highlights several economical aspects mentioned in our course.

The Law of Demand, for example, happens to be one of those aspects. As all of us have learned so far, the law of demand in economics states that the quantity demanded of a certain good/service decreases as the price of that good/service increases, and vice versa. This law clearly applies to sneakerheads, who are a group of individuals who express passion and pleasure in owning and collecting rare, limited edition, or high end sneakers.

I happen to be one of those sneakerheads out there, and I definitely am familiar with the law of demand after my fair share of knowledge regarding the sneaker market. As the price of a sneaker increases, the quantity demanded by the sneakerhead decreases as some people are sometimes unwilling to pay the premium price for that item. Similarly, as the price of the sneaker decreases, more collectors are willing to buy the sneaker given its reasonable/affordable price.

Let us look at the Jordan 1's which happen to be my favorite pair of sneakers to own and collect. Ever since the release of Jordan 1 collaborations, prices have been on a continuous steady rise as more and more collectors are interested in purchasing the limited edition items to keep and later re-sell for higher value.

Moreover, we have the Nike SB Dunks, a second favorite pair of shoes to own and collect. There is no doubt that these specific sneakers are rising in value and price by the year due to Hip-Hop artist collaborations such as Travis Scott with his signature SB Dunk sneaker, which is found in the image below.

However, the demand for rare and limited edition sneakers is often inelastic, meaning that even if the price increases, the demand may not decrease significantly. This is because sneakerheads are often willing to pay a premium price for these items due to their passion for collecting and their desire to own rare or exclusive products.

However, the law of demand may not fully apply to sneakerheads as they may be willing to pay different prices for the same item depending on factors such as its rarity, exclusivity, and historical significance. This means that the demand for sneakers may be influenced by factors beyond just their price, such as their cultural significance or their value as a collector's item.

Another economic aspect highlighted by the sneaker market is Budget constraint. Being a part time student here at UCI, a full time server at Roy's in Anaheim, and a sneakerhead, my budget is very dynamic and fluctuating.

For sneakerheads such as myself, the budget constraint is determined by my income and the prices of sneakers. If the price of sneakers increases, the budget constraint shifts inward, reducing the total amount of money that I can spend on sneakers and other goods. On the other hand, if the price of sneakers decreases, the budget constraint shifts outward, allowing me to spend more money on sneakers and other goods.

In general, the budget constraint serves as a useful tool for understanding the choices that consumers make when faced with limited income and multiple goods to choose from. For sneakerheads, the budget constraint can help them make more informed decisions about how to allocate their limited income towards buying sneakers, and can also help them identify opportunities to save money or earn more income in order to afford their desired sneakers.

Sources:

Nizar Kordab

ID#39401834

[econ23econlive]

The Economical Perspective of Being a Sneakerhead

There is absolutely no doubt that the sneaker market in the United States highlights several economical aspects mentioned in our course.

The Law of Demand, for example, happens to be one of those aspects. As all of us have learned so far, the law of demand in economics states that the quantity demanded of a certain good/service decreases as the price of that good/service increases, and vice versa. This law clearly applies to sneakerheads, who are a group of individuals who express passion and pleasure in owning and collecting rare, limited edition, or high end sneakers.

I happen to be one of those sneakerheads out there, and I definitely am familiar with the law of demand after my fair share of knowledge regarding the sneaker market. As the price of a sneaker increases, the quantity demanded by the sneakerhead decreases as some people are sometimes unwilling to pay the premium price for that item. Similarly, as the price of the sneaker decreases, more collectors are willing to buy the sneaker given its reasonable/affordable price.

Let us look at the Jordan 1's which happen to be my favorite pair of sneakers to own and collect. Ever since the release of Jordan 1 collaborations, prices have been on a continuous steady rise as more and more collectors are interested in purchasing the limited edition items to keep and later re-sell for higher value.

Moreover, we have the Nike SB Dunks, a second favorite pair of shoes to own and collect. There is no doubt that these specific sneakers are rising in value and price by the year due to Hip-Hop artist collaborations such as Travis Scott with his signature SB Dunk sneaker, which is found in the image below.

However, the demand for rare and limited edition sneakers is often inelastic, meaning that even if the price increases, the demand may not decrease significantly. This is because sneakerheads are often willing to pay a premium price for these items due to their passion for collecting and their desire to own rare or exclusive products.

However, the law of demand may not fully apply to sneakerheads as they may be willing to pay different prices for the same item depending on factors such as its rarity, exclusivity, and historical significance. This means that the demand for sneakers may be influenced by factors beyond just their price, such as their cultural significance or their value as a collector's item.

Another economic aspect highlighted by the sneaker market is Budget constraint. Being a part time student here at UCI, a full time server at Roy's in Anaheim, and a sneakerhead, my budget is very dynamic and fluctuating.

For sneakerheads such as myself, the budget constraint is determined by my income and the prices of sneakers. If the price of sneakers increases, the budget constraint shifts inward, reducing the total amount of money that I can spend on sneakers and other goods. On the other hand, if the price of sneakers decreases, the budget constraint shifts outward, allowing me to spend more money on sneakers and other goods.

In general, the budget constraint serves as a useful tool for understanding the choices that consumers make when faced with limited income and multiple goods to choose from. For sneakerheads, the budget constraint can help them make more informed decisions about how to allocate their limited income towards buying sneakers, and can also help them identify opportunities to save money or earn more income in order to afford their desired sneakers.

Sources:

Nizar Kordab

ID#39401834

[baekhvuns]

First of all Baek, happy belated birthday! You're so young bestie, but enjoy your immortality! Hope you get Seonghwa as a gift, but don't forget to share! 🎉

People absolutely do simp for clowns and I don't know how to feel about it, because clowns is one thing, but murderous clowns? That's a bit too much. 🤚🏻

Please I'm so mad, everyone on my timeline is seeing Ateez in Anaheim, even some of my friends. People in California I hate y'all! I'm currently in Berlin seeing DPR Live later today even though I didn't plan on doing it (and I might run into a "friend" I don't wanna see so rip) and tomorrow I'm going to a drag show. I'm just gonna pretend I'm seeing Ateez 🤡

I thought ToMoons were normal, but this whole issue proved there are many delulus in the fandom. And what is this person on about 😭 leave them alone if you can't support ot5. Btw two members of Treasure have left, 2022 isn't stopping... I don't follow the group, but I know Yedam was their best vocalist and trained for years so wtf

Sometimes they correct the mistakes during music shows, but only if they're more visible. I remember Ateez taking another shot once, but then with other small mistakes they didn't, tbh I usually don't notice anyway. But I saw Stray Kids make some mistakes - Woojin literally left mid-promo - so they struggled a bit

Please not Inkigayo sandwiches, I eat weird shit but no no no no ☠

Speaking of model Seonghwa...

"tbh i don’t even watch lives if psh isn’t in it" jshshshsushshdhshhs okay, but same. 😭 I usually don't watch lives in general, sometimes they play randomly and that's it. But Twitter is good for that, I don't need to watch shit yet still see the best bits!

I hope Exoplanet is real, but also if you can't go what's the point bestie :/

Baeksy can you believe I'm suddenly back to uni and got myself a boyfriend too?! Look it's HIM 😊😊😊😊

I can't with this fucking guy?!?!? 🧎🏼‍♀️I wanted to send the same thing, because what in the strip club?! Another WIP - Hwa as a night club dancer 🤚🏻

Poor Maddox, hopefully Hongjoong eventually replies/ed, but you're right Park Seonghwa would respond in a second <3

Why would booktook people take the website down? Omfg that Hoover woman and her followers are such a menace, my friend works in a bookstore and everytime someone buys/orders her books she dies inside a little bit.

Oh no, Yeosang viral zipper moment, the likessss 😭

???

The sneaky tongue I CANNOT he's a snake for real.

Also omg CHOI MINHO first solo album apparently?! And did you see Shinee's season's greetings?! From classical musicians to cereal lmao. It's a shame Minho's drama got indefinitely postponed, but I understand considering the tragedy

Hear me out: Seonghwa as a college student and part-time worker AU, he works at a bakery and laundry place (he does a terrible job at both but I go there every day) perhaps he's a night club dancer too 🙈 DV 💖

hi hello!!!

First of all Baek, happy belated birthday! You're so young bestie, but enjoy your immortality! Hope you get Seonghwa as a gift, but don't forget to share! 🎉

THANK YOU!! ANHDKW “you’re so young” cried bc i didnt want to grow old <//3 BESTIE NOT ANYMORE 😭😭😭 hoping to ask for seonghwa’s hand in marriage and i wILL SHARE

People absolutely do simp for clowns and I don't know how to feel about it, because clowns is one thing, but murderous clowns? That's a bit too much. 🤚🏻

NOO BC I GET PPL LIKE THAT ZOOTOPIA FOX BUT A WHOLE CLOWN??? murderous on top of that??? what the hell 😭😭

Please I'm so mad, everyone on my timeline is seeing Ateez in Anaheim, even some of my friends. People in California I hate y'all! I'm currently in Berlin seeing DPR Live later today even though I didn't plan on doing it (and I might run into a "friend" I don't wanna see so rip) and tomorrow I'm going to a drag show. I'm just gonna pretend I'm seeing Ateez 🤡

NO BC ALL THOSE ANONS ON MY BLOG ARE SEEING THEM SAW THEM IN ANAHEIM 🔫🔫🔫 “People in California I hate y'all!” I AGREE TO THIS !!! U GET EVERYTHING SHARE A LITTLE 🔫🔫 omg an anon on this blog is also seeing dpr in berlin,,, 2 anons 1 spACE U GUYS BETTER COME OUT AS FRIENDS omg let us know how all of that went!!

I thought ToMoons were normal, but this whole issue proved there are many delulus in the fandom. And what is this person on about 😭 leave them alone if you can't support ot5. Btw two members of Treasure have left, 2022 isn't stopping... I don't follow the group, but I know Yedam was their best vocalist and trained for years so wtf

i thought they were quite chill too but i was scrolling thru the timeline and saw some questionable things 🔫🔫 omg i was sO surprised at yedam leaving like this guy was like the face?? the ace and everything?? he spent all his life training and just 2 years into the career suddenly its poof ??? sounds sus but also heartbreaking to leave a career you’ve worked so hard for 😭😭😭

Sometimes they correct the mistakes during music shows, but only if they're more visible. I remember Ateez taking another shot once, but then with other small mistakes they didn't, tbh I usually don't notice anyway. But I saw Stray Kids make some mistakes - Woojin literally left mid-promo - so they struggled a bit /// Please not Inkigayo sandwiches, I eat weird shit but no no no no ☠

AHHHH im sure the recordings last way into the nights at times? oHHHH RIGHT RIGHT was there some sort of tension bc of the mistakes? truly was a mess of an era im sure they must’ve been frustrated,,, BESTIE WHY NOT FBAKFBKW EAT IT FOR THE EXPERIENCE,, THE CHARACTER EXPERIENCE!!!!! TICK IT OFF THE BUCKETLIST!!

Speaking of model Seonghwa...

STOP STOP STOP THE WAY I GASPED STOP THAYS HOW THIS MAN dm MAKES HIS ENTRY IN THE FUCKING FIC HES THE MAN OF THE SHOW ANONNNN DOMT MAKE ME WRITE A MODEL AU AGAIN

"tbh i don’t even watch lives if psh isn’t in it" jshshshsushshdhshhs okay, but same. 😭 I usually don't watch lives in general, sometimes they play randomly and that's it. But Twitter is good for that, I don't need to watch shit yet still see the best bits!

LMFAOOOO for seonghwa its just that he’s always doing some kind of expression, the smirks and the teasing iM ALWAYS GONNA WATCH HIS DBDB so vvv entertaining >> YEAH EXACTLY TWT HIGHLIGHTS THE BEST PARTS

I hope Exoplanet is real, but also if you can't go what's the point bestie :/

im hoping it is but i don’t think exo even know they’re having a concert 😭😭😭🤚🏼 NO EXACTLY WHATS THE FUCKING POINT,,, bUT taeyeon’s holding concerts now! about to start crying at cold as hell <33

Baeksy can you believe I'm suddenly back to uni and got myself a boyfriend too?! Look it's HIM 😊😊😊😊

HELLO I WAS LIKE BESTIE U GOT A BF??? HOW WHEN I NEED TO KNOW IF IT WAS LIKE AN AU,,, SMH BUT THIS COUNTS TOO no but the clothing is so pretty but the shipping 😭

I can't with this fucking guy?!?!? 🧎����‍♀️I wanted to send the same thing, because what in the strip club?! Another WIP - Hwa as a night club dancer 🤚🏻

im sorry what the fUCK IS THAT FBQKDHKS SEONGHWAS WOLF WHEN,,, hwa as a night club dancer 👁🤚🏼👁🤚🏼 im looking at tenelkadjowrites for that one bc their new fic is 98% smut 2% plot = amazing <3

Poor Maddox, hopefully Hongjoong eventually replies/ed, but you're right Park Seonghwa would respond in a second <3 //// Why would booktook people take the website down? Omfg that Hoover woman and her followers are such a menace, my friend works in a bookstore and everytime someone buys/orders her books she dies inside a little bit.

if hongjoong doesn’t marry seonghwa atp im gonna take him,, STOP OKAY THIS GIRLIE HAMED AUTUMN HERBS FBWMJDWK 🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫

apparently there was another acc that had 1.1 million likes on a video that shows how to use zlib 😭😭😭 it’s on sight for any coho fan i see,,, NO BC WHAT IS THIS

AND

?????

omg esp with christmas coming ur friend’s gonna be suffering 😭😭

Oh no, Yeosang viral zipper moment, the likessss 😭

the PERSON WAS SO CLOSE SIR U MIGHT AS WELL HAVE ZIPPED IT UP FJWKJDKW

??? //// The sneaky tongue I CANNOT he's a snake for real.

LMFAOOOO THATS ME IM IN THE PICTURE FBWKDH <33 and NO

Also omg CHOI MINHO first solo album apparently?! And did you see Shinee's season's greetings?! From classical musicians to cereal lmao. It's a shame Minho's drama got indefinitely postponed, but I understand considering the tragedy

PLS I SAW I CANT WAIT FOR WHAT HE DOES OMF PLS IF HE DO SOME RETRO-Y 1OF1 STYLING TYPE IM GONNA PASS AWAY,,, I DID LMFAOOOO SMS SO UNSERIOUS,, CEREALS 😭😭😭 omg now that everything’s having dates back im so excited for his show <33

Hear me out: Seonghwa as a college student and part-time worker AU, he works at a bakery and laundry place (he does a terrible job at both but I go there every day) perhaps he's a night club dancer too 🙈 DV 💖

LMFAOOOO IM SEEING GOOD BOY IN THE DAY BAD BOY AT NIGHT TROPE 👁👁 he’s the super nice sweet guy at campus but one day ur friend drags u to the club on the other wide of the town and its just him dancing there and it starts from there

omg but did hear ten’s new song birthday??? its so good????

no bc this is so true

WHATS HE DOING GHWK

😭😭😭

MUBANK WORLD TOUR??? BESTIE WERENT WE TALKING ABOUT THIS WITH WHEN KPOP CAME TO LONDON,,, ITS BEGINNING

HIS EYES

this is either duke or the new hwa in the fic 

hear me out,,, doctor hwa au

[leafs-lover]

Too Far Gone - Part Fifteen

Series Masterlist

A/N: Sorry for the delay with this, hope it was worth the wait!

Warnings: Swearing, shitty people saying shitty things, mentions of strippers, a little slut shaming. I think that’s it?

Word Count: 6800

The five days after the article broke were the worst five days for both of them. Tia was getting close to midterms so all her classes were hectic with seminars and readings. It would be a lot for any student and single mother. But her face is on the cover of multiple newspapers, constantly trending on twitter, adding an additional layer of stress.

Auston signed a 5 year $11.64 million dollar extension, he hoped that would pull some of the heat away from Tia and Taylour. It would give people something else to talk about. Instead it added fuel to the fire. Twitter lit up with comments on how much his “baby mamma is going to get,” numerous people called her a gold digger, some accused her of poking holes in the condom.

Auston turned his twitter notifications off, apart from an Instagram post about his extension, a post the team made him do, he has said nothing. Nobody bothered to read the press release, or if they did they don’t care about what it said. It said she was his girlfriend and they were in love when they conceived their son. It didn’t mention the details, just extenuating circumstances that lead to him not being involved, because that’s better than the truth. Everyone ignored the fact that Tia was his girlfriend, a girl he was in love with just fixating on the words stripper and escort.

The day after the story broke the Leafs played Anaheim, Auston wasn’t even made available for post-game comments. The next game on Wednesday was against Ottawa, the team asked him to do some postgame interviews because he signed his new deal the day before. Auston tried to not have the Gazette present, being the ones who broke the story. But Dubas told him they can’t prohibit certain media groups without major implications, but he had instructed all media personnel to keep the questions related to hockey and his contract, that his personal life was off limits. And they all complied, until Marcus Elford came along.

“Must be a relief to re-sign and know you’re coming back for five more years,” Marcus asked, turning the mic towards Auston for his response.

With a fake half-smile he gave the answer years of media training has prepared him for. The stereotypical, cliché response. “Yeah, I mean we have a great group of guys, and have a lot of hope for what we can accomplish. The fans are great, best in the industry to play in front of, so I’m happy to be a member of blue and white for at least 5 more years.”

“Must be nice too, since your son –“ Auston immediately walked away not even bothering to hear the rest of the question.

With Tia busy in school, it meant Becks is also busy, which has led to Auston spending some time with Taylour. All week Tia has been short, very dismissive in her answers. He knows she is mad about their fight, about what he said to her. About her.

He gets it, he is still mad at what she did to him. But some things are bigger. And dealing with this, talking about what is going on, seems more important. But she won’t talk about anything besides Taylour, constantly brushing him off. He tries to tell her it will blow over, reminds her not to read the articles, and she doesn’t, it still doesn’t help. Every day her eyes are a little emptier, her face slightly more drained. It’s obvious to him she isn’t sleeping, and he doesn’t think she has been eating much.

Arriving at her apartment that night Auston hoped that something had changed since yesterday and she would want to talk. But once again she said nothing. Once Taylour was asleep she went to her room packed her stuff and left for work. She said bye and then she left.

Arriving at the Brass Rail, the place is packed.

It is a Friday night, and Friday’s are busy, but this is more than normal. They are at full capacity, a line of people waiting to get in. Pulling her hood up, hiding her face as she walks in through the employee entrance only to find backstage it is just as hectic. The women are gossiping, chatting as usual. But there is a lot of tension, a bitterness in the air. Every time Tia looks at someone or walks by their posture shifts, sometimes they stop talking all together.

“Just ignore it babe,” Abby said, squeezing her hand slightly.

“They clearly are talking about me. About it,” she adds, as if the clarification was needed.

“It’s nothing, it will blow over. The place is packed, they’ll make a bunch in tips and nobody will pay attention to anything else,” Sarah adds.

“I hope you’re right,” Tia sighed.

She wasn’t. She was very wrong.

“This is fucking stupid,” Sam uttered bitterly, coming backstage for an outfit change a half hour later. “How is there this many people, and nobody is tipping?”

“Because they aren’t here for you,” Tamara piped in, fluffing her hair in her mirror. Eyes land on Tia, anger becoming more apparent in the room.

“It’s not her fault,” Abby scoffed in response.

“I was giving a private dance and they asked when Carmen would be coming out.”

“I keep hearing people say Tia as I walk by.”

“Someone told me to tell you everyone is waiting,” Kylie scoffs.

The overlapping chatter continued. Tia ignored it, she has for the last five days, so what’s another five hours? Putting her head down she continued to get ready, picking out her outfit, her performance time nearing. For the first time since she first started Tia is uneasy. Her hand shakes slightly and she feels as though she could puke on the floor.

With no lights on, only the blue light from the TV illuminated the room. The Office played quietly in the background, barely focused on the TV Auston mindlessly scrolls through Instagram. It’s so quiet he almost didn’t hear the door close, but he doesn’t miss the sound of her heels clicking on the floor. “Tia?” he asked, shocked seeing her this soon.

Her eyes are glossed over, breathing uneasy, the duffle bag on her shoulder lands harshly against the floor. Stopping in the living room one hand finds the wall for stability, the other trembling, struggling to remove her heels.

Pulling her coat off she hung it on the back of a chair. Taking in her appearance Auston realizes she looks like hell. Not her hair that is perfectly curled or her dewy makeup, but everything else about her screams red flags to him.

Her leggings are on inside out, and she is only wearing a bra not even bothering to put her sweater back on. Next is that she is wearing heels, normally she would change into some boots or sneakers. Instead the bottom inch of her leggings are damp from the slush on the Toronto sidewalks, her toes red from the low temperature.

Auston hasn’t watched Taylour much while she is at work, but she always changed before coming home. Tonight though, tonight she just needed to leave.

Pausing the episode, his brows furrowed, trying to understand what is happening. “What’s going on?” he asked, voice full of concern.

She huffed in response.

Turning around she walked into her room. Waiting for a second, unsure what to do, he heard her sniffle. Against all better judgement he rose to his feet and followed her to her bathroom, sitting on the edge of the tub watching as she struggles to pull off her fake eye lashes and hair extensions.

Her hands shook and her breath trembled, she almost gagged while standing at the sink. But he waited. Waited while she grabs a face wipe and began removing her makeup. Waited while she ran her brush through her hair drenched in hair spray. Waited as she brushed her teeth.

“Tia,” he called out, following her into her bedroom. Opening her dresser for some clothes, she whispered she needs to change. Slightly frustrated with her, Auston leaves and sits at the table, hoping she joins him.

And she does a few minutes later. Her foot tapped uncomfortably against the floor, her fingers knocking against the table. And they sat in an uncomfortable silence, the only sound her sniffling for what feels like ages. Every second felt like minutes, and minutes feel like hours. But he just waited until he can’t anymore.

“Tia, wha-“

“So I got sent home.” She cuts him off. “Place was packed, massive lines. Should be good right? The kind of things the club loves to see?” Her questions are rhetorical, so again he waits. “There was a fight with customers in the parking lot, an almost fight with some customers inside. Everyone there to see Auston’s girl,” she air quotes.

He sighed. He knew something happened because of the article. But hearing her say it is worse.

“It’s too much for security, they are worried about something happening. I guess some of the other girls complained, nobody is spending money on anything, and they’re taking the seats of paying customers while nursing a drink for the night. So I am taking some time off,” she sighed. “They think it will just be a week or two, just ‘til this dies down.”

“Sorry,” he muttered, mind racing a mile a minute.

“Why? Figured you’d be happy. It’s what you wanted,” she replied bitterly.

Scrunching his face he sighed and bit his tongue. Obviously it would be easier if she wasn’t a stripper, was never a stripper, and for selfish reasons he wishes that were true. But he wanted her to stop being a stripper because it’s something she wants, not because she is forced into that decision. “What if it’s more than a week before you are back at work?”

“Don’t know. Figure it out.”

He understands she is mad for what he said to her, but he wishes she could lower her walls slightly, just for a minute. That she would talk to him, because she isn’t going through this alone.

“If you need help, just –“

“I won’t,” she retorts, silence once again falling between them. The tension that hangs in the room is thick, so thick he could almost choke. There is so much he wants to say, but doesn’t know how. “I’m actually pretty exhausted, it’s been a really long night,” she finally declares.

“Okay,” he concedes, trying to hide the frustration in his tone.

“Have a good game tomorrow,” she says, as he slides his chair out.

“It’s actually a road trip,” he explains. “Be gone almost 10 days.”

“Oh,” she replied softly. “Well I’ll be home every night, so you can try to FaceTime with him around your schedule. It might go horribly with his attention span, but, you can try” she sighed, “if you want.”

“Thanks Tia.” The suggestion meaning more to him than he can even say.

Heading to the door, he stopped back in at Taylour’s room. His night light on in the corner, sprawled across the bed like a starfish. Stepping in, he picks up his monkey that fell off the bed. Gently brushing the curls from his face and tucks his monkey back in, he places one soft kiss on his forehead.

Driving home there is a weight on his shoulders. So much he wished he could have said to her, that he could have reassured. But most importantly for her to believe it. For him to believe it.

Half way through the road trip everything was going well. The Leafs won two of the first three games. Auston was kept off the scoresheet for the first two, but turned it around in Colorado, getting three points.

True to her word Tia answered his FaceTimes, and as predicted they went terribly. Taylour had very little interest in talking to a screen, but she tried to keep him engaged as long as possible. One day that was for 15 minutes, the next it was for less than five. But any time is better than no time.

Tuesday was a little tricky, with her class, the game and the time change. Unable to find a time that worked he thought he would have to wait until Wednesday. But Tia sent him a couple pictures, which was a nice surprise for him to see once finally on the plane. He showed Mitch and Patty the pictures, and that was when Patty asked what he was doing for Tia for Valentine’s Day.

“Nothing,” Auston replied, swiping to the next picture.

“You’re getting her nothing?” Bozak chimed in. Turning around in his seat, he quirked an eyebrow and furrowed his brows. His face alone made Auston’s stomach churn.

“Yeah, she’s not my girlfriend why would I get her something?” Auston shrugged, trying to dismiss him and the other eyes glaring at him.

“Because she is the mother of your child,” Mitch criticized. “I don’t have kids and I know that.”

“With everything that’s happened, she can’t really expect anything from me,” Auston protested. While only Fred knows they slept together, he did inform a few of the guys that she blocked him once he left Zurich. So he doesn’t quite understand their view that he should get her something.

“The next couple years you have to get her presents from Taylour, once he is old enough he can take on the responsibility, but for now it’s all you,” Patty explains.

“For real?” Auston groans.

“Yes!” all three said simultaneously.

“You don’t have to get her a gift from you, but at the very least you have to get her something from Taylour,” Patty explains. “We’re not talking diamonds, something small.”

“Christmas, Mother’s Day, Valentine’s Day and her birthday, you gotta do it,” Tyler adds in.

“You’re setting an example for Taylour, he will pick up on everything you do,” Patty further elaborated to him.

The rest of the flight he thought about it. And lying in bed that night. Eating breakfast the next morning he sat beside Fred and asked his opinion. The look followed by his booming laugh were answer enough, but Fred proceeded to explain why he needed to. This lead to Auston calling some florists back in Toronto.

The one he used a couple times in the past was booked solid, making him ask some of the guys for recommendations. Two of the shops laughed so loud into the phone, Auston just hung up. Not having any luck after calling six places, he considered just showing up after the road trip and giving Taylour a bouquet to give to her in person. It would be a little late, but would be better than nothing.

Feeling all out of options, one of the trainers mentioned a small shop he uses. They answered right away and were very eager to help, so he placed an order of colorful daisies and chrysanthemums, something he assumed Taylour would pick out if he took him to the shop.

They asked if there was anything else and he said no, happy with his decision. But as time went by, he kept hearing Patty’s voice in his head saying at that very least you have to get her something from Taylour. Very least. Those words resonated with him. He tried to shake it off, but he couldn’t, because it’s not just her birthday it’s also Valentine’s Day.

When they dated he got her two bouquets and two presents. Her father always made a point to celebrate both as well. If he is setting that example for Taylour, he knows he needs to get her two. So he called back. He didn’t know what to get this time, it had to be different than the other bouquet, and that he didn’t want to get her roses. The cliché Valentine’s Day flower, the symbol of love and romance.

After a long discussion he finally settled on white Calla Lilies, her favourite flower, mixed with cream roses, hydrangeas and alstroemeria as well as eucalyptus and delphinium stems. He hoped that this gesture helps to lower her walls, that maybe she would be willing to discuss everything, or at the very least more than they have been.

The next morning his phone buzzed violently against the side table. He struggled to open his eyes, groaning at the intrusion to his sleep. A sliver of light filters through the partially open curtain, the clock beside him illuminating 5:56.

Grabbing his phone, he tilts the screen and sees a picture if Taylour, worry immediately sets in. Being Thursday he knows Tia has a busy afternoon, class from 1030 to 5, and with his game that night he doesn’t expect to talk to her until tomorrow. Something is wrong.

“Tia,” he croaked out through a raspy voice, mouth dry and full with the taste of metal. “What’s wrong?” He sits up rubbing the sleep from his eye, coughing to clear his throat.

“What? Nothing is wrong,” she replied, slightly baffled. Auston can hear the smile in her voice and Taylour babbling slightly in the background, and his heart begins to settle.

“Oh, it’s just so early,” he yawned, “thought something was wrong.”

“Who the fuck is calling at 6am?” Mitch muttered from his bed, pulling a pillow over his head. Even though Auston signed an extension, his new contract doesn’t start until the fall. Since him and Mitch are on entry-level contracts the league dictates that they share a room for the rest of the year.

“One sec,” he groaned, scrambling out of bed and walking into the bathroom shutting the door. “Sorry,” he turned on the tap grabbing a glass for a quick drink to soften his parched throat, “what’s up?”

A FaceTime notification pops up which he accepts, being met by two bouquets of flowers sitting on her kitchen table. Doing it over the phone, with a florist he had never heard of, Auston had no idea how they would turn out. But they are actually better than he imagined.

“Just wanted to say thank you for these, but you didn’t have to,” she laughed flipping it around, adjusting the camera to focus on Taylour.

“Hey Taylour,” Auston smiles. He has a wide smile stretching from ear to ear, a mess of curls on his head needing to be tamed.

“Who’s that Taylour?” Tia asks, bouncing him slightly on her thigh.

“Mommy…mommy get flowers,” he explains, pointing to the bouquets.

“She did?” Auston laughed, pretending to act surprised.

“Are they pretty Tay?” Tia asks.

“Yeah, they are blue and green,” he squealed, causing both of them to laugh.

“Did you get mommy the flowers Tay?” Auston asked him.

His forehead pressed into a scowl, and he pursed his lip. Glancing up at Tia, then back to the flowers he thinks over the question, before finally announcing “no, I diin’t,” causing both Tia and Auston to burst out laughing at his honesty.

“Are you mommies Valentine?” Tia questioned, leaning down she places a kiss on his cheek and begins to tickle his side slightly.

“Yesss,” he giggled in response.

“Such a good Valentine,” she adds in, giving him another kiss.

“Hey Tay,” Auston calls through the phone. “Can you do something for me?"

“Yes,” he nods his head eagerly.

"It's very important," Auston further explained.

"I can do it!" he proudly declared.

“Okay," he chuckled lightly. "Give your mom a hug and say happy birthday.”

“Okay.”

He shifts in Tia’s grip, wrapping his arms around her neck. “Happy birdday mommy.”

“Oh thank you,” she held him tight to her chest, another kiss landing on his cheek. Finding Auston on the screen she sends him a soft smile, before releasing Taylour.

Auston continues to chat with Taylour, but he can’t help but notice the grin that remains plastered on Tia’s face. He gets a small hopeful feeling of relief and begins to think maybe the worst is behind them.

“Mommy, down!” he shrieks after a few minutes and Tia sets him down. This is normally the time where Tia will give him a quick update on him, anything exciting he has done. That normally lasts about thirty seconds, then an awkward silence falls over them before Tia says something about having to study for midterms.

“You look really tired,” Tia laughs noticing the bags under his eyes, sleep crusted to the side of his eyes, hair is a mess of knots and curls. “Look exhausted,” she further added in.

“That’s what happens when people call at 6am,” he joked. “We play in Vegas tonight,” he adds, seeing her confusion.

“I’m sorry, I should pay more attention to your schedule. I just wanted to talk to you, thank you before I leave for class.”

“Don’t apologize, waking up and seeing him makes it worth it,” he answered, with a wide smile. This is the first FaceTime she has initiated. He doesn’t want to read too much into it, but the simple action speaks volumes.

The game against Vegas went really well, another multi-point game for Auston, another win for the Leafs. Next they play Arizona, a game he typically looked forward too. This year the Leafs have two days off after the Arizona game before playing in St. Louis.

Originally his plan was to go to his parents after the game, spend the following day with his family and then fly to St. Louis in the evening to meet the rest of the team. But he hasn’t spoken to his parents since they left Toronto. He has text a bit with Alex and Bree, but it has been complete silence from his parents. That is until after the Vegas game.

Mom: Your dad and I would love to see you if you have time.

Mom: I miss you.

He didn’t reply. He re-read that message about a hundred times. But he didn’t replay.

Not the day before the game. Not the day of the game. Not even when his sisters met him at the locker room after the game. He considered just getting on the plane with the team, but he kept remembering that message. Those three words lingered in the back of his head.

Renting a car, he went to his condo that night.

And once again he stared at the screen.

His fingers hovered over the keyboard and he read those three words, eight letters, over and over. He wanted to reply. He missed her, she is his mom, but he is disappointed in everything that transpired. The things her and his dad said and did.

Locking his phone, he stared at the picture of Taylour. Unlocking it he stared at the message once more. Caught in the middle, unsure of what to do, he decided to sleep on it. Right before he locked his phone, a notification popped up, a text.

Dad: I’m sorry.

Walking in to his parents’ house, his mom almost squealed in excitement. Instantly wrapping her arms around his neck, over the moon to see him. He spent the next hour, catching up with his family, chatting about Taylour. He told them about how he feels like Taylour is developing an attachment. That he is slowly becoming more comfortable, and he thinks he is earning the dad title. That every time he has to leave it gets harder and harder.

Everyone seems to be enjoying hearing about him. His mom asked a few questions, his sisters asking millions, though his dad stayed relatively silent.

He told his sisters about Tia blocking him, that everybody in the family was blocked. That she denied it. Continues to deny it. He showed Bree the videos of Taylour skating, he showed them the endless pictures he has of him. His sisters constantly asked when they will meet him. If it will be the summer, or maybe during one of their visits to Toronto. Auston danced around the idea, not having the heart to tell them no.

Before everything happened he would have asked Tia. Things were good then, and Tia might have agreed for him to take him for an afternoon. He had never taken Taylour anywhere besides the Marleau’s, but he couldn’t see her saying no to an afternoon at his apartment with his family.

But now, he doesn’t even know if he would want to take him anywhere. Nobody knows his name, nobody knows what he looks like. Taking him out someone can easily snap a picture, something Auston doesn’t want to happen. Maybe with some time, this will blow over and he can consider asking, but for now it’s not an option.

“How are you doing Papi?” Ema queried, finally having a few minutes alone with him in the kitchen.

“I’m good ma,” he smiled. “It’s not always easy, but I’m doing alright.”

“Being a parent never is,” she tells him.

“I never know what to do, or if I’m doing it right. Tia is this expert, having done it all before, but I feel like a chicken with its head cut off half the time.”

“She’s not an expert, nobody ever becomes an expert at parenting,” Ema laughed.

“Taylour wanted a grilled cheese this one day, and I cut it horizontally and he cried like it was the end of the world. He wouldn’t eat it, I had to make him another one. But this is just something she knows.”

“You cried because I wouldn’t let you eat the sticker on an apple once,” Brian chuckled. Auston turned around, having no idea how long his dad had been there. “Alex cried one time because I touched her balloon. Kids get upset over ridiculous things.”

“Tia only appears to be an expert because she cut his grilled cheese wrong once and learned not to do it again. You’ll get there papi,” Ema reassured him, squeezing his arm slightly.

“Yeah,” Auston nodded, taking a sip of water.

With a deep exhale, silence fills the kitchen. An uncomfortable silence, where everyone has something to say but nobody can. His eyes dropped to the floor, unable to keep eye contact with his parents, his sisters chatting quietly in the other room.

“We saw the article.” His mom’s voice cuts the tension like a warm knife through butter.

“Yeah.”

“We just want to know how you’re doing,” Brian adds.

“How do you think I’m doing?” he replied with an eye roll.

“Auston –“

“It’s just…it’s a lot,” he finally admitted with a sigh. “Tia doesn’t want to talk about it, the team only wants to have meetings to talk about it. Everyone wants something different.”

“What do you want?”

If he’s being honest he wants to go back to about an hour before they slept together and change everything. But that isn’t an option. “For this to settle. I know it will happen eventually, people will get bored or find something new to talk about. I just want it to happen soon.”

“And what about Tia?”

“Before the article things were…they were rocky. She isn’t my favourite person right now and I’m probably not hers. I’m not going to stop seeing Taylour so we have to figure it out.”

“What’s going on with Tia?” Ema questioned, her eyebrow quirking.

“A lot.” He doesn’t want to tell them. His sisters know, but right now he parents don’t need to know everything. The last thing he needs is for them to find out Tia purposely kept Taylour from him. They already had suspicions about Tia and were very vocal about their concerns. With everything going on he doesn’t want to hear an I told you so speech. “She’s not working right now. Stories are still swirling, rumours and everything. It’s hard on her, I can tell it’s taking a toll on her but she doesn’t talk about it.” He explained shifting the attention.

“This isn’t something you can ignore papi,” Ema sighed.

“I know ma, I can’t force her to talk to me though. I FaceTime with Taylour, once he is done we talk a little. I tell her not to read the stuff online, she says she isn’t. Maybe once I’m home she’ll want to talk about it. In person.”

“Hopefully,” she gently squeezes his hand.

“I’m gonna –“

“You need to know we’re sorry Auston.” Brian cuts in, having been relatively quiet during their conversation. “We were only thinking of what is best for you and your career. You’re our son.”

“And Taylour is your grandson,” Auston retorted.

“We know. We were wrong.” Ema said softly.

“We hope you can forgive us.”

“I’m still mad,” Auston tells them.

“We know, we just hope with time.”

“Yeah.”

Auston shoots them a soft smile. He is going to forgive them, he has to. Everything they have done, all their sacrifices they have made. He wouldn’t be anywhere without them. He loves them, always has, always will. He misses talking to them. His dad about hockey, his mom about how his day is going. He misses them. But right now he needs more time to fully forgive them.

“I still can’t believe she did that,” Max hissed in a hushed tone. “I know they never got along, but that is really extreme.”

Her friends ambushed her tonight. Over the past couple weeks Tia has been able to use the excuse of “I’m really busy with school,” as a reason to not see her friends. Not answer their questions, not have to talk about the one thing it seems like the entire city is discussing.

However, she can’t use that right now because it’s reading week. She lied and told them Taylour was sick on Friday and Saturday, but today they all just showed up. Children’s Tylenol, cough syrup, soup and crackers in toe.

As soon as Tia opened the door Taylour bee-lined to the door, almost tackling Max. Muttering something to Tia about how he didn’t look sick, they forced their way in. Becks and Emily cleaned the towering stack of dishes and cleaned her kitchen, something Tia had been ignoring. They forced her to shower and change her clothes and played with Taylour.

They ordered dinner and everyone watched a movie. Everyone laughed and smiled, for a bit Tia forgot about everything happening outside her door.

“How are you actually doing hun?” Emily asked, coming into Tia’s view. Max and Becks are a few feet away sitting at the table, the table with the two bouquets Auston sent on display. They flowers whose leaves are slowly shriveling and turning brown, the petals starting to wilt. Each day the flower drain a little more, losing some more of their life. The way Tia sees those flowers likely is the way her friends currently see her.

Max and Becks are trying to be quiet. But it’s no use. Tia has become an expert on recognizing when people are talking about her, or what happened.

“Not good,” Tia sighed. Her voice sounded as broken as she is. Her eyes are heavy, bags big and dark.

Emily reached across the couch and gave her ankle a soft squeeze. “You know we’re all here for you, we’d do anything for you.”

“Yeah,” Tia blinked back some tears, sending her a soft smile.

“She feels bad about it,” she hears Becks whisper to Max.

“You hungry?” Emily asked, Tia just shook her head no. “You need to eat.”

“That doesn’t make it better,” Max snapped, his voice barely louder than a whisper.

“When was the last time you ate? You didn’t have dinner.”

“I’m not saying its okay, just that she regrets it.”

“Can you guys stop talking like I’m not here?” Tia said somewhat aggressively. Seeing the look of shock on her friends faces Tia sighed. She didn’t mean for it to come out as hostile as it did. “Sorry, it’s just everyone is talking about me as if I’m not here. But you guys are my friends. If you have something to say, please say it to me.”

“You’re right,” Becks agrees. Walking over, she sat beside Tia. Kissing her temple she pulls her head down to her shoulder. “Sorry. We just don’t know what to do here.”

“There is nothing that can be done. Just be here. It helps.”

Max walks over and sits between Tia and Emily. “We only talk about you, because you won’t talk to us.”

Tia’s forehead creases into a scowl, eyes slowly starting to drop, “I don’t want to talk-"

“You don’t have a choice,” Max bites.

“I kind of do,” she protested.

“No.” his voice bellowed, everyone’s eyes widen in response.

“Max,” Emily hisses.

“No. This whole thing is fucked up. I know she struggling, but were here for her, here to help. We can't help her if she doesn't talk to us.”

Tia opens her mouth to speak, but her voice never comes. Jaw closing she glares at her friend.

“We’re waiting.”

“What the fuck do you want me to say?” she snapped, her voice getting louder with each word. “You want to hear about the lacrosse team asking me if I would perform at one of their parties. Or how about the 60 year old cashier bit their tongue as I bought milk.” Her voice catches with in her throat, she chokes on her tears but tried to keep going. “What about the 700 follow requests I currently have, or the men who have DM'd me asking of I wanted to be their sugar baby.”

At this point there is no stopping the tears. They are falling. Fast and hard.

Tia doesn’t tell them about the countless guys who have given her their numbers at school. She doesn’t tell them about the glances and whispers as she walks in the halls. She doesn’t tell them how she hasn’t taken Taylour anywhere, that some of her neighbours have made snide comments in passing.

“Or how about how the only person who can relate, the only other person who is going through this…I can’t even stand to look at. How he -" She hiccupped through her sobs and Becks tightened her grip on her. “How I let my guard down and let him fuck me, and now I can’t stand him or myself.”

“Tia,” Becks tries to reassure her, but her emotions have taken over. Her entire body tingled and her eyes burn. Pulling her glasses off she wiped some tears from her eyes, only for new ones to replace them.

“You two just need to talk, you’ll sort it out," Emily tried to reassure her.

“He called me a vindictive bitch. A heartless bitch, a terrible mother. Said he wished he never met me. And those were the nicer things he said, how can we sort it out? Why would I want to?”

Everyone falls silent, processing everything they heard. Tia sniffles against Becks shoulder, Max and Emily’s eyes finding each other. “Okay, maybe things with him are too far gone, but Taylour needs him and he needs you. He needs you to eat and sleep,” Emily chimes in.

“I’m not hungry.”

“Tia I’ve been here for 9 hours you haven’t eaten anything."

“If I was hungry I would eat,” she chastised.

“When was the last time you slept?”

“I slept last night.”

“Really? You look like shit,” Max muttered, more honest in that reply than he usually is.

“Max!”

“No, look I’m worried. When was the last time you had a good night sleep? When you woke up feeling rested?”

“A couple nights ago.”

It’s a lie. She knows it, they know it.

She hasn’t had a good night sleep for weeks. She has replayed that night over and over in her head. The night she and Auston spent together. That was the last time she slept good. That was the last time she was truly happy.

“Let us take Taylour for a night. You can have a bath, watch a movie, read a book, and do absolutely nothing. Have some you time,” Emily offers

“Honestly he is the only thing that brings me joy right now, he’s all that is keeping me going.”

“Hey Auston,” Bree called out, opening the sliding door. It’s getting late in the day, his time left in Arizona running low.

“Hey Bree, what’s going on?”

“I have a question,”

“Okay.” He adjusted his sunglasses, turning to face her as she settled in on the outdoor couch with him.

“Or a statement or something. I don’t really know.”

“Okay,” he laughed in response. “What is it?”

“So you know how you said you unblocked all of us on Tia’s account?”

“Yes.”

“Okay…well….uh…”she sputtered out.

“Bree what is it?” he laughed.

“Just look.” She unlocked her phone and handed it to him. Scanning the screen she has Instagram open, Tia’s profile on display. Everything looks normal, what you would see when viewing a private account. Her profile picture, the number of posts, but instead of a follow button, it says unblock.

“I thought maybe she’d add me so I could see pictures of Taylour. But apparently I blocked her, except I didn’t.”

Not believing his eyes, he goes into her app settings, and there is her username listed as a blocked account. “It’s the same with Alex,” she divulged.

“Are you kidding me?” Handing the phone back he pulled his out. “I kept forgetting to send her a follow request, so I haven’t checked mine,” he explained. Opening up his app and searching her username he finds the exact same thing. A wave of guilt washes over him, his stomach flips and he can taste the bile building in his throat.

He could understand some glitch if it was one account, but it’s not a coincidence with three separate people. Closing his eyes, he took a shaky breath, trying to process everything.

“She was telling the truth.” His voice is barely a whisper while he tries to process the news. But he repeats that sentence, not once but two more times. This proves that she was being honest, she didn’t block him. That he ruined everything for nothing.

“Fuck,” he lifts his hat slightly, running it over his scalp. “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” His tone gets louder. “I said some horrible shit to her, like absolutely terrible shit.”

Bree reaches over and gently nudges his arm, “I’m sure when you explain she’ll forgive you.

“How could she?” He cursed. “I called her a bad mother, pretty sure I called her a psychotic bitch, I –“ he trailed off replaying that conversation in his head. Every word, every hurtful terrible thing he said about her. She was absolutely devastated by the time he left, the fact she has even spoken to him is shocking.

“Auston,” Bree’s face softens. “Tia was kind and understanding, just explain it to her. Based on how it looked it makes sense you said those things.”

Shaking his head, his heart rate picks up and he is overcome with guilt. There was an insurmountable amount of evidence, but he should have known better, should have trusted the woman he knew from Zurich. He has no idea what to do, how to even explain this to her. How they can move past it.

“I ruined it, I ruined everything.”

“I doubt you ruined –“

“We slept together Bree.”

“Ew,” she muttered quietly, her nose crinkling up slightly.

“Literally the night before. We woke up that morning, cuddling in bed. We could have gotten back together Bree. If I didn’t yell at her and say all those horrible things…I can’t see her forgiving me now. I’ll be lucky if she is nice to me because fuck I wouldn’t be, I’ve been such a dick to her. God I’m such an idiot.”

He wipes away a few tears, the realization that them being a family is gone and it’s his fault. They had the potential to go somewhere. It would have taken time. There would have been bumps in the road, stressful talks, some setbacks and tears. But there also would have been dates and late night Facetimes. Cuddling up next to her at night, kissing her every morning.

Waking up that morning he thought they could do it. They could go through all that, and come out on the other side. He genuinely thought they could get there. That it was so much more than sex. But now, that won’t happen.

He doesn’t even know if Tia will let him explain. But he is certain Tia won’t ever let him in again, him having caused too much pain. For what feels like the hundredth time this month alone, Auston feels like he is having an out of body experience. Bree continues to talk, her hand gently resting on his but he registers none of it. His heart beating louder that her voice, his body is numb to her touch.

Taglist: If you are in this list you have expressed interest in the series (either through likes/reblogs or by asking). If it’s crossed out your tag didn’t work. If you would like to be removed or added to the list send me an ask:

@ashleymarine @albal321 @b34ut1fulb4st4rds @biznastysloneshift12 @burkylover @c-tangerine @canadian-girl87 @crazzyfann @dana-hqy @delighttfulll @evawest5 @every-beautifulthing-thereis @greendragonzz @heatherawoowoo @hockeybabe87 @hockeyinaussie @hockeyisit @hockeyjedi13 @hockeypuckedmeup @holyalfalfasprout @je-ne-regrette-rien @localcalumhoe @partypoison00 @princesscameston @puccbunni @queenmarvel21 @sixmapleleafs @starswin @trashforbarzal @0kikina0 @1-fuzzy-squirrels @janeydeaux @stuff4me2do

[powerblais]

NHL reverse retro jerseys as school presentations

Anaheim: did more than everyone else and it makes everyone nervous

Arizona: nailed it

Calgary: got the assignment and did it nicely but it’s a bit weird

Edmonton: did not read the instructions, copied from last year’s group someone’s sibling was in

LA Kings: did the assignment but accidentally plagiarized their friends in the next class over

San Jose: tried--nice design, but a bit forgettable

Vancouver: did the assignment, definitely understood the 90s

Vegas: a bunch of new students had to throw something together

Boston: bare minimum, interesting color choices

Buffalo: did the assignment, everyone feels threatened

Detroit: basic white ppt

Florida: did it the night before

Montreal: did the assignment exactly as it should be done

Ottawa: did the assignment but had been talking about it for so long, no one pays attention

Tampa Bay: did the assignment, questionable font choice

Toronto: class debates break out

Chicago: cool but still the same bad stuff

Colorado: tried to pay homage to a previous year’s class but just pissed off everyone

Dallas: forgot there are people in the back row

Minnesota: solid work, not for everyone

Nashville: looks like no work was done until you pay attention

St. Louis: did the assignment, was the one who got the project assigned to everyone in the first place

Winnipeg: did the assignments, tried to go ~edgy~

Carolina: did what was expected of them

Columbus: no one really thought they’d go for it, but they did and it’s fantastic

New Jersey: thinking of Christmas break

New York Islanders: forgot about the assignment until the morning of

New York Rangers: gave the people what they wanted

Philadelphia: did the assignment, but people expected cooler

Pittsburgh: did the assignment by following directions to the letter

Washington: did the assignment, definitely no compromises were made

[uppersidedreams]

[ mitch marner, cis man, twenty-two ] Let’s give a warm welcome to one of Sparkwood’s finest, CHARLIE CONWAY !! Before coming here, he once lived on the pages of THE MIGHTY DUCKS. Though now they currently spend most of their time as a STUDENT / HOCKEY PLAYER. If you ask the townsfolk about what they are like, you will hear that they are DETERMINED but also CLUMSY. If they had a theme song it would be HOLD ON - JUSTIN BIEBER.

note: you can find my full muse page here !

bio triggers: n/a.

life was never easy for charlie conway, but that didn’t necessarily mean that it was bad. he was raised by a single mother and grew up in the small town of sparkwood. his father ended up abandoning charlie’s mother soon after she gave birth but she didn’t let this sudden heartbreak shake her will. she was determined to provide her son with the best life possible, working long grueling shifts at the diner to help pay the bills and obtain necessities. as charlie grew up, he found himself spending a lot of time watching television to distract himself at his babysitter’s house. something that always sparked his interest was hockey. he was a big fan of the minnesota wild, the pittsburgh penguins, and the anaheim ducks, looking up to several of the players he watched play on the ice.

due to his love for the sport, he eventually managed to convince his mom to sign him up for peewee hockey. that’s where district five’s hockey team in sparkwood came in. it was a team full of misfits that were easily pushed around on the ice, with no coach truly giving the rag-tag group a chance. but the coaches who didn’t truly care about them didn’t phase charlie, he still loved the game and was passionate to get better as a player. the team didn’t turn around until a man named gordon bombay became their coach. at first, he was reluctant and apathetic, but once he saw the spirit and personalities of the kids he warmed up to them. they soon became a team that no one wanted to mess with: the mighty ducks of sparkwood.

with age, charlie and his teammates moved onto the juniors league and gordon followed them to keep motivating them. charlie’s skills only improved and before long he was named alternate captain to the team. he didn’t have any ambition to move onto being captain and was content with his role on the team, especially since his best friend adam was the captain of their team. but when they graduated high school, adam unexpectedly left their team and began to play for their rival team. charlie was soon named captain of the team and his passion for the game was slowly flickering out. he felt so much pressure on his shoulders. charlie felt utterly betrayed and still doesn’t know how to cope with the aftermath of adam’s departure from the team. he hasn’t bothered trying to speak to the other since then, despite adam’s attempts to reach out.

he still plays hockey now and attends university where he majors in sports management.

HEADCANONS.

charlie plays centre and actually used to be really bad at his position initially. he would always trip over his own feet when trying to navigate the ice. luckily, that was something he grew out of.

he is bisexual, but fairly closeted about his sexuality. he has a lot of internalized homophobia due to the environment that he’s constantly in and the fear his teammates with think he’s into them just because he likes men.

his idol is sidney crosby ! he totally has a crush on him too, but you didn’t hear that from me.

he’s a little on the insecure side and gets really flushed whenever someone compliments him. he’s starved for praise, truly.

he has major trust issues due to both his father and his best friend’s abandonment.

he gives pretty good pep talks before the game despite not initially wanting to be captain.

drinks too much mountain dew to be as healthy as he is.

helps his mom when she has late shifts at the diner because he’s a momma’s boy. <3

[sunsummoneds]

[ mitch marner, cis man, twenty-two ] Let’s give a warm welcome to one of Sparkwood’s finest, CHARLIE CONWAY !! Before coming here, he once lived on the pages of THE MIGHTY DUCKS. Though now they currently spend most of their time as a STUDENT / HOCKEY PLAYER. If you ask the townsfolk about what they are like, you will hear that they are DETERMINED but also CLUMSY. If they had a theme song it would be HOLD ON - JUSTIN BIEBER. Let’s see how their story unravels this time.

note: you can find my full muse page here !

bio triggers: n/a.

life was never easy for charlie conway, but that didn’t necessarily mean that it was bad. he was raised by a single mother and grew up in the small town of sparkwood. his father ended up abandoning charlie’s mother soon after she gave birth but she didn’t let this sudden heartbreak shake her will. she was determined to provide her son with the best life possible, working long grueling shifts at the diner to help pay the bills and obtain necessities. as charlie grew up, he found himself spending a lot of time watching television to distract himself at his babysitter’s house. something that always sparked his interest was hockey. he was a big fan of the minnesota wild, the pittsburgh penguins, and the anaheim ducks, looking up to several of the players he watched play on the ice.

due to his love for the sport, he eventually managed to convince his mom to sign him up for peewee hockey. that’s where district five’s hockey team in sparkwood came in. it was a team full of misfits that were easily pushed around on the ice, with no coach truly giving the rag-tag group a chance. but the coaches who didn’t truly care about them didn’t phase charlie, he still loved the game and was passionate to get better as a player. the team didn’t turn around until a man named gordon bombay became their coach. at first, he was reluctant and apathetic, but once he saw the spirit and personalities of the kids he warmed up to them. they soon became a team that no one wanted to mess with: the mighty ducks of sparkwood.

with age, charlie and his teammates moved onto the juniors league and gordon followed them to keep motivating them. charlie’s skills only improved and before long he was named alternate captain to the team. he didn’t have any ambition to move onto being captain and was content with his role on the team, especially since his best friend adam was the captain of their team. but when they graduated high school, adam unexpectedly left their team and began to play for their rival team. charlie was soon named captain of the team and his passion for the game was slowly flickering out. he felt so much pressure on his shoulders. charlie felt utterly betrayed and still doesn’t know how to cope with the aftermath of adam’s departure from the team. he hasn’t bothered trying to speak to the other since then, despite adam’s attempts to reach out.

he still plays hockey now and attends university where he majors in sports management.

HEADCANONS.

charlie plays centre and actually used to be really bad at his position initially. he would always trip over his own feet when trying to navigate the ice. luckily, that was something he grew out of.

he is bisexual, but fairly closeted about his sexuality. he has a lot of internalized homophobia due to the environment that he’s constantly in and the fear his teammates with think he’s into them just because he likes men.

his idol is sidney crosby ! he totally has a crush on him too, but you didn’t hear that from me.

he’s a little on the insecure side and gets really flushed whenever someone compliments him. he’s starved for praise, truly.

he has major trust issues due to both his father and his best friend’s abandonment.

he gives pretty good pep talks before the game despite not initially wanting to be captain.

drinks too much mountain dew to be as healthy as he is.

helps his mom when she has late shifts at the diner because he’s a momma’s boy. <3

[toxoiddiamond]

T H E B A S I C S Given Name: Seong Ki-mun Nicknames: He briefly went by the name Kyle in middle school because he was tired of people teasing him about his “weird” name. But by the time he got to high school he didn’t care anymore and was back to going by his real name. (He also started purposely mispronouncing the names of anyone who made fun of his name– think A-a-ron.) Age: 30 Birthday: November 23rd Zodiac Sign: Sagittarius Birthplace: Anaheim, California Current Location: NYC, New York Speaks: English, Korean (fluently, but his family teases him about his “American accent” all the time) Dominant Hand: Right Education: He got his Associates Degree from LaGuardia Community College, then transferred to NYU and got his Bachelors in Arts & Sciences. He cheerfully refers to college as the most money he’s ever wasted in his life. Occupation: Teaching Assistant in the English department at CUNY Hunter College. He mostly assists with the Writing and Poetry classes, but also helps out with various Literature classes and acts as a substitute teacher within the department if a professor is out sick or anything. He sometimes ends up being treated more like a personal assistant– sent out for coffee or lunch, asked to type up notes or sort paperwork, but he doesn’t mind. Vehicle: Ki-mun’s aunt and uncle bought him a white 1998 Honda Prelude when he graduated from high school, and he still has it to this day. He doesn’t drive much since it’s so impractical in the city, but he likes having it around as an option for longer trips, road trips, etc. Worldly Possessions: Tons of random art supplies– pencils, charcoal, sketchbooks, clay, paints, brushes, etc. Notebooks completely filled with poetry (with many of the poems scribbled out). A fancy smart TV. A bunch of bean bag chairs. A super nice tablet (Ki-Mun may have a bit of an obsession with having the latest technology~). Tons of socks– like, way too many socks. He has an entire dresser drawer just for his socks. Pet(s): A super adorable calico munchkin kitty named Bugsy.

A P P E A R A N C E Height: He says 5’8”, but he’s closer to 5’7”. Hair: Dark black. Very full, soft and shiny. Always seems to fall perfectly into place even with the bare minimum of effort. He usually just puts a bit of pomade in it and tousles it. Facial Hair: His facial hair is very patchy, so he doesn’t bother growing it out. Eye Colour: Brown Skin Tone: A makeup artist friend of his, Andi, occasionally asks to put makeup on Ki-mun as practice (and also for fun) and has informed Ki-mun that his skin tone is “warm beige.” She also informed Ki-mun that he is an Autumn– Ki-mun doesn’t know what that means, but he likes to share it as a fun fact anytime he has to introduce himself to a group of students. Clothing: Ki-mun dresses like a pretty typical hipster, honestly. Skinny jeans, oversized sweaters, band tees, peacoats, cardigans, leather jackets, etc. He usually wears contacts, but occasionally wears big ol’ glasses. Distinguishing Marks: Does being adorable count as a distinguishing feature? Face Claim: Justin H Min

H E A L T H Physical Health: Not bad. Ki-mun was born HIV positive, but has been taking antiretroviral medications since he was a kid. At this point, his viral load is basically non-existent and he is considered to be in remission, with a very good prognosis. Because of the medication he takes, his immune system is not the best, and he is much more susceptible to getting sick as a result. During cold and flu season, Ki-mun will often wear a mask when he’s out in public– his aunt and uncle ingrained that habit in him from a young age (and also wore masks themselves so he wouldn’t feel like the odd one out). Physical Abilities/Limitations: He’s decent at almost anything to do with art, but is especially good at drawing with charcoal. He also likes doing speed-sketches, figure sketches, etc. He is also weirdly good at baseball, and plays on the New York City Metro Baseball Team as part of the NY Blacksox during the season (June through August). Also, he is great at tossing food directly into people’s mouths– popcorn, M&Ms, etc. He hardly ever misses. Addictions: Definitely caffeine, but no serious addictions. Allergies: He gets a mild rash when he eats or touches strawberries. Mental Health: It’s not horrible? It’s not great, but not horrible. As much as he denies it, Ki-mun is pretty lonely, partly because he has such a hard time letting anyone in. He’s not the most trusting person, and tends to keep people at arms’ length until he’s sure they can be trusted. At the moment, he only has one person in his life that he would actually consider a friend. Everyone else is just an acquaintance to him. Ki-mun has sort of “accepted” the idea that he may end up being alone forever, even though that’s not really what he wants.

H I S T O R Y Summary: Ki-mun was born in Anaheim, California, and got off to a pretty rough start. His mother had AIDS, and unfortunately, it was passed on to Ki-mun. He was fine and had no symptoms for a few months, but eventually began to get sick, though thanks to swift treatment, he recovered quickly and the HIV never progressed. As Ki-mun got older, his mother’s health began to deteriorate, until finally they moved in with Ki-mun’s aunt and uncle so they could help take care of her. She eventually was bedridden and had to stay in the hospital full time. One of Ki-mun’s earliest memories is of visiting his mother in the hospital for the last time, which is absolutely one of his worst memories. After his mother passed away, Ki-mun’s aunt and uncle took him in and raised him as one of their own children. They love him like crazy and were amazing parents to him, and Ki-mun has always been grateful to them– not only for raising him, but for loving him as much as they love their actual children and never making him feel like he mattered less. He had a relatively happy childhood in spite of everything. After high school, Ki-mun decided to move to New York– he wanted a change of pace, and wanted a chance to start over and reinvent himself. He found a job and began taking classes at the community college, managed to get his associate’s degree after a year and a half, and transferred to NYU to get his Bachelors. Ki-mun was a very dedicated student and didn’t spend a lot of time getting to know any of his fellow classmates, going to parties, making friends, etc. Still, he ended up being roped into a friend/study group, which is where he ended up meeting Spencer. Spencer was the first person that Ki-mun had serious feelings for. They were friends for the better part of two years, each attracted to the other but both too nervous to say anything. Finally, a week before graduation, Ki-mun got up the courage to confess how he felt, and they became an official couple for all of one day. Unfortunately, once Ki-mun explained to Spencer about his diagnosis, Spencer flew off the handle and accused Ki-mun of being deceptive, being a liar, being manipulative, etc. He told Ki-mun he was disgusting and to never contact him again, and that was that. Shortly after Ki-mun’s heart was smashed to pieces, he packed up everything he owned and moved to a new area of the city, wanting to put at least a little bit of distance between himself and his old friend group. It was here that he met Andi and became close friends with her, and also found a job at CUNY Hunter College. Although Ki-mun feels that his life is generally good and happy– he enjoys his job, has a really good friend and coworkers he likes, he has gotten really into his poetry lately and has been reading it at open mic nights– he can’t help but feel that something is missing from his life. Job History: He worked in his aunt and uncle’s restaurant from ages fifteen to eighteen. When he moved to New York, he did a little bit of job hopping before finally settling on a job at a grocery store– he stayed at that job until he graduated from college and took his job at CUNY Hunter. Fondest Memories: Despite the fact that his childhood was pretty rough at times, Ki-mun has a lot of great memories as well. Family trips to Korea, various birthdays, his graduation day. He also has fond memories of his job at the grocery store– as much as he didn’t enjoy the work, he really liked his coworkers. Plus, all the various spur-of-the-moment adventures Andi has dragged him into. Worst Experiences: His mother dying when he was four years old. Finally getting to be with the person he’d been hung up on for two years, only to be broken up with after less than a day.

C O M M U N I C A T I O N Speech Pace/Style: Sarcastic. Often sounds like he might be annoyed. He speaks in monotone with most people, even when he’s not in a bad mood, so people often think he’s angry or doesn’t like them (and to be fair, they are sometimes correct). If he’s talking to a friend, he’ll definitely be more animated and not so grumpy. And if, by chance, he’s talking to someone he’s attracted to (*coughDODGERcough*) then he’ll get a little tongue-tied, like he wants to flirt but he doesn’t really know how. Accent: American. When he speaks Korean, his American accent does come through a bit, something his family likes to tease him about. Favorite Phrases or Words: When he’s done listening to someone and wants them to stop talking to him/stop telling him a boring story, he will just say “cool” in the most monotone voice he can manage. It usually works. Usual Curse Words: He says “Jesus Christ” and “oh fuck” a lot.

P E R S O N A L I T Y, M I N D S E T, A N D B E L I E F S Personality Type: ISFP-T Sense of Humor: Definitely sarcastic and dry. He can be mean at times, but usually only if the person deserves it. As a result, Ki-mun has been described as “sassy” more than once. When he’s with people he actually likes, Ki-mun is a lot more lighthearted and not so sarcastic. Habits: Twists his lips a little when he’s thinking hard. Rolls his eyes when someone says something he thinks is dumb. Also rolls his eyes and sighs if he’s stuck in a conversation he really doesn’t want to have. When he’s reading his poetry out loud, he never looks up at the audience/whoever is listening because he’ll get too nervous if he sees everyone looking at him. Fears/Phobias: As much as he tries to act like he doesn’t care what anyone thinks of him, Ki-mun is very secretive about certain aspects of himself, and is very afraid of someone finding out more about him than he wants them to know. He can’t stand having his privacy invaded, and it honestly makes him feel sick to think of the wrong person knowing too much about him (he still hates that he ever let himself be so vulnerable with Spencer, and blames himself for not seeing more clearly what kind of person he was). Strengths: Ki-mun is very creative and has a knack for all kinds of art. Although it’s hard to get to know him, once he becomes friends with someone, he is fiercely loyal and would do anything for them. As a teacher/teaching assistant, he is exceptionally patient– much more so than in other aspects of his life. He is always happy to answer questions and help anyone student who needs it. Underneath his harsh exterior, Ki-mun is a kind person who just has trouble opening himself up to others. Flaws: He has built up a lot of walls around himself in an effort to try and keep himself from getting hurt. Every time he’s let those walls down, he’s ended up regretting it and building them back up even higher. Anyone who wants to get to know him has to be very determined. Ki-mun is also not the type of person to be nice just because social conventions say he should– if he doesn’t like someone, he won’t talk to them. If he thinks someone is boring, he will tell them so. He can’t stand small talk and will never willingly engage in it. This makes him a very difficult person to interact with. Hopes/Desires: He is not entirely sure what he wants to do with his life, but right now, he’s happy just working and exploring his options. All he knows is that he wants to keep writing poetry, possibly get some published, and keep working in a field that lets him play to his strengths. Wildest Fantasy: A cure for HIV/AIDS being found. Self-Esteem: It’s a little complicated. On some level, Ki-mun is confident in himself and proud of all he’s accomplished in his life. But at the same time, he has it in his head that he doesn’t deserve some of the things he wants, such as a romantic relationship, marriage, a family, etc. He kind of views himself as damaged goods, unfortunately. Religion: He was raised Protestant, and his family used to be fairly devout. He went to church every Sunday, they read scriptures and said a family prayer every night, etc. But the older the kids got, the less active in the church the entire family became. His parents and siblings are still casually religious, and Ki-mun has held on to certain aspects of it, but he doesn’t care about going to church or reading the bible or anything.

R A N D O M Sleeping Position: Usually on his stomach, occasionally on his back. Boxers or Briefs?: Briefs Day or Night?: He’s okay with both. He works during the day, which he likes, and in the late afternoon/evening he goes to the cafe and hangs out or reads his poetry. Top or Bottom?: Bottom, but he’s willing to switch if his partner wants to. Partying or Relaxing?: He likes parties, but he really prefers relaxing when it comes right down to it.

R E L A T I O N S H I P S Closest Friend: Andi is currently the only person Ki-mun would call a friend. He has a lot of acquaintances, but no one else that he’s really close to. Relationship History: He dated a couple of people in high school, but it was just puppy love and nothing serious. He had a couple of flings in college as well, just short-lived, purely physical relationships, and the only sexual encounters Ki-mun has ever had. And then there was Spencer. Ki-mun has not even been on a date since that whole debacle. Sexual Partners: Just the two guys Ki-mun had brief flings with. Thoughts About Sex: He enjoys it. He’s also pretty sure he’s never going to have it again, and has come to accept that.

P A R E N T S Name(s): His mother’s name was Seong Bo-ram. His aunt and uncle are named Park Min-ji and Park Kang-dae. Age(s): His mother passed away at the age of 28. His aunt is 57 and his uncle is 60. Social Standing: His mother was very well-liked, but was shunned by a lot of her friends after she not only became pregnant out of wedlock, but ended up contracting HIV. His aunt and uncle are well-respected in their community, and also well-off financially, firmly in the upper middle class. Occupation(s): His mom was a flight attendant. His aunt and uncle run a small Korean restaurant which is extremely popular– on weekends there’s often a line of people outside waiting to get in. Religion: Protestant-ish. Quality of Relationship With Their Children: Ki-mun’s mom loved him a ton– the reason she left him to her sister and brother-in-law is because she knew they would love Ki-mun as much as she did, and she was right. Ki-mun is still very close to his aunt and uncle. Living/Deceased: His mother is dead, but his aunt and uncle are alive.

S I B L I N G (S) Name(s): Park Kang-min,  Jang-mi (aka Jamie) Sanders, and Park Bo-ram (named after Ki-mun’s mother). Age(s): 33, 31, and 27. Social Standing: They’re all doing quite well in life and are upstanding members of society. Occupation(s): Kang-min is a commercial airline pilot, Jamie is currently a stay-at-home mom but plans to go back to work as an RN once her kids are a little older, and Bo-ram is a violinist with the California Symphony. Religion: They’re all sorta Protestant, but Jamie is the only one of them who still goes to church now and then. Quality of Relationship with Character: Even though they are technically Ki-mun’s cousins, they always refer to him as their brother. They’re all pretty close; they don’t talk all the time or anything, but when they do, they get along very well and have always enjoyed each other’s company. Living/Deceased: All living~

D A I L Y L I F E Living Arrangements: Ki-mun lives in a modest studio apartment fairly close to both his work and Central Park. The apartment is well-decorated, with a lived-in, cozy sort of look. He’s very comfortable where he is, not at all bothered by living in a small space, especially considering how much more expensive it would be to upgrade to a one-bedroom.

[dspre]

for the most recent ask meme, do you mind doing it for all of the ones you’ve spoken about? i would like to learn more about them all

Oof. I don’t mind; I love yelling about these nerds, but oof. That’ll be... Eth, Zab, Rome, Slava, Milagre, Iridian, Ellix, Sunny, and Milena (I was going to do Orlando and Anaheim as a bonus, but I couldn’t come up with good answers for them. Also not including Kaio, Aino, or Nikola, since I’ve mentioned their names but haven’t really said anything abt them, or Hazeldine, who I forgot to mention in the OCs I need to talk about more.)

Eth:

Strength: quick to adapt to new situations and circumstances

Weakness: doesn’t put work into interpersonal relationships, comes off as incredibly abrasive and hostile at first

Random fact: I have no idea where I came up with her name, but in-universe she tried to introduce herself as Beth around a new group of people and misspoke, then rolled with it until she decided she liked Eth better anyway (her full name is Elizabeth)

Zab:

Strength: cheerful even in the face of adversity, an unshakable optimist

Weakness: has a hard time seeing the big picture of anything, trying her best but mostly just doing what she’s told, fine in everyday interactions but has poor communication skills regarding deeper subjects

Random fact: gonna retcon previous statements here and say her hair is naturally ash brown, but she dyes it a wide variety of colors (although usually only one at a time)

Rome:

Strength: just keeps getting up and keeping on going no matter what

Weakness: very little sense of self except as a tool for the final battle

Random fact: [I can’t think of anything particularly interesting that isn’t spoilery, sorry]

Slava:

Strength: very good at noticing small details and figuring out how they play into larger events, also a hella good secret keeper

Weakness: (so many, honestly, but) has a well-defined in-group, and is often apathetic toward people who are not in it

Random fact: teaching Chronomancy in an effort to revive the practice and provide skilled observers and protectors of the main timeline, keeps in close touch with many of its previous students

Milagre:

Strength: friendly and sociable, a good listener, makes others feel included and appreciated

Weakness: she’s a huge doormat and hardly does anything of her own accord without outside influence

Random fact: has a pair of yellow boots that she is very proud of, they have black stripes down the outside and don’t match anything she owns but she wears them every day, they were one of her first quest rewards

Iridian:

Strength: has a strong sense of who she is and that she’s doing the right thing, makes decisions and stands by them including taking responsibility if they turn out badly

Weakness: tries too hard to project a tough persona, and ends up being seen as unapproachable and alienating people

Random fact: one of the only characters who has had the same name since I first came up with her, also is distantly related to Eth through time travel shenanigans that may or may not ever be brought up in-story

Ellix:

Strength: likes being helpful and can get things done quickly if they’re important or interesting, has a wide social circle and always “knows a guy” for any given situation

Weakness: so incredibly scatterbrained, has way too much on his plate at any given time and doesn’t know how to say no to people, terrible at budgeting and often finds he’s bought so many craft supplies he can’t afford things he needs

Random fact: has a huge collection of pimped-out canes in every imaginable color scheme, almost all with copious amounts of glitter

Sunny:

Strength: assumes the best of people unless proven otherwise, hardworking and doing their best to figure out how to be the hero, would never let a friend or ally get hurt or left behind

Weakness: has difficulty dealing with setbacks and uneven odds, hides the stress they’re under until they break down over it, has trouble asking for the emotional and sometimes material support they need because they think they should be able to do things all on their own

Random fact: their actual name is much longer and less pronounceable to English-speakers, but part of it roughly translates as “Sunny,” and they would rather be called that than have people mangle it all the time

Milena:

Strength: confronts her problems head-on as soon as they appear instead of waiting for them to get worse (learned this the hard way)

Weakness: has a hard time trusting anybody, sometimes lashes out at people who are trying to help her

Random fact: lives a double life as the wife of a noble and a secret member of the time police, wears colored contacts to hide her red eyes

OTPs:

Eth/Sabrina Greenstar (they date for a while, but eventually break up amicably and decide to just be friends, I ship it cause it’s cute and they’re just really nice together even though it doesn’t work out)

Eth/Milagre (never happens, but I like the idea)

Eth/Orlando (bad, would not approve of irl but I find the dynamic interesting, also is not explicitly romantic but is definitely more intimate than friendship)

Slava/Milena (also bad, also do not approve of, never happens, this is entirely one-sided on Slava’s part but it’s a viewpoint character and I get way too far into its head sometimes)

Sunny/Ben (I haven’t talked about Ben and would prefer not to field asks about her, but she’s the second of the three Designated Heroes)

BROTPs:

Eth & Milagre

Milagre & Hazeldine (cousins)

Ellix & Kaio

Kinisy & Medenda (I don’t even know who these people are, I just know they’re really good friends, PvP champions, and live on Unicorn Way)

I swear I have more but a lot of them are OC & CC and I don’t want to talk about those before I write the story bc people get weird abt it

Also I’m way more of a plot person than a character person so non-plot-relevant OCs mostly haven’t been developed yet, but I promise everyone has relationships with people other than the MC

NOTPs:

Eth/Iridian (see above where I said they’re related)

Iridian/anyone tbh (she’s aro)

Slava/Milena (bad, Milena would not be okay with this)

Slava/Cyrus Drake (I only mention this because I feel like it’s going to be misconstrued since I introduce them in the same scene, but anyway this is very very no for a whole hell of a lot of reasons)

[dailyfeartwdgifs]

‘Fear the Walking Dead’ Star Alycia Debnam-Carey Reveals Alicia’s Trajectory in Season 5 

Fear the Walking Dead veteran Alycia Debnam-Carey says Alicia will become a “better person and leader” in Season Five, and grow deeper in her bond with mentor figure Morgan (Lennie James). 

“It’s been a real delight to be with a character this long and see her grow from being a high school student to becoming this fierce warrior, and although there’s so much tragedy that’s happened, I think it’s given her all the tools to be such a capable young woman,” Debnam-Carey said at WonderCon in Anaheim, California. 

“But I think really what we’ll see more going forward is her trying to reason with what to do next, and is there hope? And that’s what really will make her a better person and leader throughout it all. Because if you can’t connect to the humanity of it, then I don’t think you’ve got anything left.”

As the last-surviving member of the Clark clan following the devastating deaths of mother Madison (Kim Dickens) and brother Nick (Frank Dillane), Alicia grew significantly when she took on a big sister role with her brother’s killer, Charlie (Alexa Nisenson). 

Now Morgan leads the group as they embark on a fear-filled new mission to seek out and help other survivors, taking up those duties in the closing moments of Season Four after finding inspiration in the late Madison and kind-hearted trucker Polar Bear (Stephen Henderson).

“Morgan and Alicia’s pairing is very interesting,” Debnam-Carey said of the dynamic, launched when Morgan attempted to impart his peaceful ideology on a grieving and revenge-seeking Alicia in Season Four. 

“I think they both are trying to wrestle with the same philosophical questions of, ‘What is the reason to keep going? Why do we want to keep going, what’s the point?’ I think she does see him as a sort-of mentor, because he does take her under his wing, and try to convince her that there is more to this and that we have to do better things to make up for what we’ve done and that it can be a really positive thing to do, and it can give you hope, and give you a sense of reason and purpose.” 

That hope and purpose is something Alicia “needs.” 

“Everything she’s been through, she’s lost so many people, and she’s become very much this guarded warrior,” Debnam-Carey added. “And that’s what she prides herself in, and that’s what she thinks is the only thing she can do, which is just fight and kill. And I think he’s one of the people that knows there’s so much more [to her] than that and wants to get her to start trusting again.” 

Returning alongside Debnam-Carey and James are series regulars Danay García, Jenna Elfman, Garret Dillahunt, Maggie Grace, and Alexa Nisenson. Also on board this season are Mo Collins and Daryl Mitchell as grifter duo Sarah and Wendell, Rubén Blades, back as the long-missing Daniel Salazar, series newcomer and Walking Dead alum Austin Amelio as Dwight, and franchise newcomer Karen David as Grace.