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hcartachesx · 9 months

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CALLY, 31, CST; SHE/HER. | if you’re hearing SOON YOU’LL GET BETTER BY TAYLOR SWIFT playing, you have to know KATE TJONG (SHE/HER; FEMALE) is near by! the 40 year old ELEMENTARY SCHOOL TEACHER has been in denver for, like, HER ENTIRE LIFE. they’re known to be quite SELF-LOATHING, but being NURTURING seems to balance that out. or maybe it’s the fact that they resemble KRISTIN KREUK. personally, i’d love to know more about them seeing as how they’ve got those KIDS FLOCKING TO THEM, MOTHERLY VIBES, AND COVERING PAIN WITH A SMILE AND ENDLESS WORK vibes. and maybe i’ll get my chance if i hang out around the MONTBELLO DISTRICT long enough!

Trigger Warning for teen pregnancy, cancer, pediatric cancer, child death, depression, grief, & suicide

Basic Info

Full Name: Katherine Grace Tjong Nicknames: Kate, Katie Age: 40 Birthday: June 30th, 1983 Zodiac: Cancer Occupation: Elementary School Teacher (5th Grade) Schooling: University of Denver Hometown: Denver, Colorado Ethnicity: Dutch, Chinese-Indonesian, Chinese-Jamaican Languages Spoken: English, some Indonesian Gender: Cisfemale Pronouns: She/Her Sexuality: Heterosexual Relationship Status: Single Living in: Montbello District

Family Info

Maternal Grandparents: Hendri and Amoy Subagyo (nee Fong) met in Indonesia as children. They grew up together and got married very young. Hendri and Amoy moved to America with the help of Hendri’s brother, Badri, who had already immigrated there. Badri got Hendri a job in a construction company and Amoy began working as a seamstress before having their daughter, Alice Subagyo. Hendri died at the age of 46 from a heart attack and Amoy moved back to Indonesia eight years ago. Paternal Grandparents: Silas and Grace Tjong (nee Peris) met after Grace’s family moved to Boulder, Colorado when she was in high school. Silas and Grace bonded over a shared history of being Chinese-Indonesian with both speaking Indonesian. They were married after college and had three children together. They still live in Boulder, though they often travel the world. Parents: Paul and Alice Tjong (nee Subagyo) met at the University of Denver, where Paul was a teaching assistant and Alice was in her third year. They got married only a year later after Alice fell pregnant, though their marriage didn’t last. When their daughter was only nine, they divorced. Paul remarried four years later and is still with his current wife, whom he retired to Florida with after being a high school history teacher for many years. Alice remarried several times and had many different jobs. She lives in Colorado Springs, but often visits her daughter in Denver. Siblings: Kate has three stepsiblings through her father’s remarriage, though they are not very close as they were nearly adults when their mother married her father. Son: Eric James Tjong, who died at the age of eight years old from cancer Pets: None

Physical Info

Hair color: Dark Brown Eye color: Hazel Height: 5’4” Tattoos: None Piercings: One in earlobes Character Inspo: Katniss Everdeen (The Hunger Games), Olivia Benson (Law & Order SVU), Haley James Scott (One Tree Hill), Ella Montgomery (Pretty Little Liars), Emma Swan (Once Upon a Time), Regina Mills (Once Upon a Time), Bobby Nash (911), Melissa McCall (Teen Wolf), Mia Jones (Degrassi), Elena Gilbert (The Vampire Diaries), Mustang (Red Rising), Elain Archeron (ACOTAR), Cami O’Connell (The Originals), Tessa Gray (The Infernal Devices)

Background

Kate was born in Denver, Colorado during the happier times of her parent’s marriage. Though those happy times did not last very long. She didn’t know a time when her parents weren’t fighting with each other, but they doted on her often. It was honestly a bit of a relief when they divorced. Kate stayed with her mom, but often visited her father. Their home was in the Lakeridge District. Her mother didn’t finish college after she fell pregnant and had a variety of odd jobs over the years. From a waitress to a substitute teacher to a daycare worker. Alice got married several times, but again, these often didn’t last. Alice seemed to want a better life than they could give her, one she felt she couldn’t achieve on her own.

While her mother’s life was a bit more chaotic, her father’s life was much calmer. He settled down with an older woman who already had kids mostly grown. They lived a quiet, happy life and are still together. They were never very rich, but Kate never felt like she was lacking for anything. Both sides of her family connected her to her Chinese-Indonesian culture, especially her mom given her status as a first generation American in her family. Her grandparents being close by helped as well and she appreciates where she comes from, though she does not speak much Indonesian. However she does often cook foods she learned from her family.

Growing up, Kate was one of those people everyone liked. Her kind nature and genuine attitude towards people drew them to her. Ask around people she graduated with and they would say she was always nice. Most didn’t know her that well, but they at least had a kind word to say about her. She was encouraged by friends to join the cheerleading team freshman year, which is how she met her first love. He was on the football team, though he was often on the bench those first few years. But during the first game when she was cheering and he was sitting on the bench, they chatted a bit and they ended up agreeing to a first date. From there, they were inseparable.

TW: Teen Pregnancy

They were the It Couple, the ones everyone talked about being together forever. You often didn’t see one without the other. As they got older, he became a football star and soon they were the ones winning homecoming king and queen, prom king and queen, all the things. They had all their firsts together and talked often about the future together. But reality quickly shifted when Kate fell pregnant just before graduation. She was terrified and wasn’t sure what to do, as well as being afraid of her family’s reaction and his. At first when she told her boyfriend, he was freaked out, but agreed to be there for her. They tried to tell their families together, but his family had always disapproved of her. They had never really accepted her and had hoped for better things for their son. He had gotten a major scholarship for football to a school out of state and wanted him to go there. They wanted Kate to get rid of the baby. Due to pressure from his family and them getting in his head, he told Kate he wasn’t ready to be a father, that he needed to go away to college and pursue his dreams. It broke her heart and they ended things.

He left and never came back, while Kate changed her plans, living with her mother and attending the University of Denver. While her mother wasn’t happy about her pregnancy, she still supported her daughter. She managed to attend some summer classes and most of the first semester so that she could take off the second semester and take care of her child. Her son was born in December and from the moment she laid eyes on him, Eric was everything to her. Since his father wanted nothing to do with him and neither did his paternal grandparents, she never told them about the baby or anything. Occasionally she saw them around town, but they never once asked about their grandchild. Kate’s parents were a huge help when it came to raising her son. They would take turns watching him while she attended university and worked. Her grandparents often came to help with him as well. And while it took a bit longer than normal, she managed to graduate university and become a teacher.

She loved children and was always good with them, so being a teacher had been her plan for years, especially thanks to her father’s influence with his own teaching career. She began teaching the first grade and absolutely loved it. Outside of her work, she fully devoted herself to her son. He was her entire life. She didn’t really date or even attempt to do anything without him. And while they struggled, they were happy together. Until Eric turned six years old and became very sick. He began having trouble eating, growing thinner and thinner, and unable to keep food down. At first, Kate thought it might be some sort of stomach bug, an ulcer, anything other than what it turned out to be.

TW: cancer, pediatric cancer, child death

After many doctor’s visits, Eric was diagnosed with pancreatoblastoma, a rare pancreatic cancer. He had tumors in his pancreas that had been growing for quite some time slowly. They began treatment quickly, starting with surgery in attempts to remove the tumors. During surgery, they found they were unable to remove some of the tumor, so he began chemotherapy. It was a long battle for two years with many ups and downs, but eventually, Eric just became too weak and the cancer too strong. He passed away at the age of eight, devastating his mother. It broke Kate to lose her son, the most important person to her. It was like she lost her entire life when he was gone.

TW: depression, suicide, grief

She fell into a deep depression after her son died, all of it crashing down on her. She took a sabbatical from work and was barely able to leave her bed or home for almost a year. Her friends and family were worried for her, especially after one found her ready to end her life to be with her son. They encouraged her to attend grief counseling and she did. It took a long time for her to get to a place where she could get out of bed, that she could be a normal person again. The pain was with her always, but she could manage it. She came back to teaching eventually, her coworkers welcoming her with open arms. At first it was hard being around the kids, realizing her own son would never reach their age, would never grow older.

Over the years, she has managed to put herself back together. She is a great teacher and still has kids coming up to her to this day, saying she was their favorite teacher. In her social life, she very much keeps to herself, still never having really been with or dated anyone since her first love. She attempted a few dates, but they never worked out.

Personality:

Kate is a very kind and empathetic person. However, she is also very shy and quiet at times. People would describe her as the girl-next-door, the one everyone likes and gets along with. After everything happened with her ex, she became more independent, more hard working to provide for her son. Once he passed away, she became even more reserved, keeping to herself more often. In recent years, she has thrown herself into all sorts of things to avoid feeling lonely and depressed. She volunteers at the theater, doing all sorts of odd jobs for Felipe, including using her old piano skills whenever needed. She is always coming up with fun things for her class, trying out new hobbies, and participating in every sort of city event she possibly could. During the summers when she isn’t teaching, she often even volunteers with the daycare center or library with children’s programs.

#kate tjong #kate intro #chq.intro

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the-cat-chat · 29 days

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May 11, 2024

Bird Box (2018)

Five years after an ominous unseen presence drives most of society to suicide, a mother and her two children make a desperate bid to reach safety.

Warning: Review may contain spoilers. Read at your own risk.

JayBell: It's Mother's Day weekend and to celebrate we've decided to honor our mother, Sandra Bullock. I remember when Bird Box came out and everyone was doing that stupid "Bird Box" challenge, blindfolding themselves and wandering around. I wonder how many people were injured while bird boxing?

This is my second watch of the movie since it came out in 2018. After this rewatch, my feelings are pretty much the same: It's alright. I don't hate or dislike this movie, in fact, the plot is right up my alley. It's just full of SO many plot holes that they do become a little hard to overlook.

For example, why on earth can't these creatures go inside a building or a car? Any explanation, even a stupid one that I could latch on to would help. How are Sandra Bullock and her hot younger man so in shape after like six years of living on scraps? What grocery store sells so many walkie-talkies and live birds?

And let's be real. Ain't no way that boat gets overturned on the river and both kids survive, are located, and are fine. While blindfolded. Can these children even swim?? Did I miss them getting swimming lessons at the local YMCA? Nah, both children and the birds in the box would've died easily. At least have the kids tied to Sandra Bullock or something. Speaking of the kids, I get being traumatized, but they acted so robotically throughout the movie, mainly just the boy. I just found it odd.

With all that said, I like Sandra Bullock's character. I like how upfront the movie is about Sandra Bullock's character's uncertainty and maybe even dislike of the possibility of motherhood. It doesn't seem like she wants to be a mother in the beginning, and soon the choice is taken away from her. She doesn't have this stereotypical, perfectly caring, maternal energy and personality. Is that hard to see play out when she's in charge of children? Yes. But that also makes it feel more realistic. She isn't some motherly caricature that people romanticize. In fact, our hot younger dude that shacks up with Sandra ends up being the maternal figure in the movie, which is interesting.

That doesn't mean she doesn't love the kids. Being the perfect mother isn't her priority, especially in these circumstances, she just wants them to survive. I like seeing this imperfect view of a usually romanticized (or overly criticized) figure.

Because of this view of motherhood, I rate the movie higher than you would initially assume based on the several plot holes I've identified (and the several more I didn't mention).

P.S. mgk what are you doing here? And Wong from SVU?

P.P.S. No way would Sandra Bullock's hot younger military guy let her name the children Girl and Boy for years and years.

Rating: 5.5/10 cats 🐈

Anzie: Ok. Soo unfortunately my love of Sandra Bullock didn’t drag me from under my rock to get me to watch this when it was all the rage. But better late than never and my ruined cuticles and I cannot tell a lie- this was pretty great while giving every organ in my body cortisol damage from pure stress.

I have to just get it out that my reoccurring thought since we watched this is how awesome it is that the movie can illicit such nervous anxiety and fear without even having to worry about what these “monsters” look like (other than the pictures that crazy guy drew) but like seriousllly Grade A acting as to be expected. Sarah Paulson truly knows how to put on a good waterworks show.

* Quick aside- Sandra Bullock and Sarah Paulson - uh long lost sisters, what a duo? And all the other random actors?? I think MGK gave me whiplash. Totally not expecting that or John Malkovich?? Or any of the other random pop ups.

Anywayyy, I kept getting The Mist vibes, especially at the grocery store and in the car- and we know that went well for us, and I have to say sorry Stephen King but in terms of unseeable creatures and the end of times, Birdbox has got it going on.

I have no nails at the point I’m writing this. I probably didn’t breathe until the next day after seeing this?? I was so on edge and hated to know what happened next- and the jumps in time when this thing started to now with her trying to get her and the kids to the other group?? Soo fantastic- I do have to say tho I feel there are a lot of little plot holes and situations, and I’ve got questions, but I’m sure the book really goes into everything in greater detail, so I’ll let it slide. I loved how she ends up at a school for the blind and her ob/gyn is also there??? But how mortified would you be to say the kid’s names are boy and girl??? After the whole conversation 10years prior?? I’d die. I know there are deeper meanings to the whole story- and in the context it’s a horrific idea on how mental heath or really anything consumes people/ and the concept if you ignore it and do t look at it straight on it just goes away and doesn’t exist- but this is really a nerve racking story just at surface level too, and it’s interesting that it can be both with how the author created this story.

^ the whole concept of birdbox was lost on me momentarily while we watched this??? Honestly, I’m still gonna blame the Benadryl I’ve been taking for my allergic reaction so I don’t feel terrible about myself. 😅The whole out of sight out of mind deal- I legit forgot there were birds every time until they came back on screen—- but now I can’t stop thinking if how some believe birds can be messengers to people with the spirit world?? And if that was a reason the author chose birds??? It’s really killing me bc I love all the little different messages each bird symbolizes- but also like that’s a lot to put on a little bird?? Whyyyydddd he pick birddddss to see the evil things?!?!?!?!?!

I’m probs just reading too much into it. JOSH MaLERmaNnnnnnNnn why??

Rating: 6/10 Birds 🦜

#movie #movie review #film #film review

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moprocrastinates · 2 years

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i’m watching the “motherly love” episode of SVU and every time the mother does something, i’m just like “oh yeah my mother has said that” or “oh yup she’s done that.” i recognize not everyone with BPD is like the mother in this episode and that so many are caring for themselves in healthy and productive ways, but mine is. she’s not going after teenagers or anything illegal like the mother is in the episode, but the abusive relationship towards her family, the constant belief she’s always in the right, the ruining of others’ lives to protect her own? it’s as familiar as my own name.

and then olivia talks to the son in the car about how it’s not his job to sacrifice his life for hers and i’m crying on a goddamn tuesday

#personal #kenna rambles

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vreenak · 3 years

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The jury's got to see what she's doing, hate her as much as we do. - Maybe. But a few skeptical jurors and she walks on a murder charge.

#barisi #sonny carisi #rafael barba #law & order svu #svu #motherly love #18x10 #season 18 #mine #my edits #*mysvu #*barbaeps #*sonnyeps

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eighthmark · 7 years

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“He is so guarded, and he has his intelligence as such an armor. He’s really good at putting people down and not letting things get to him. It’s really interesting to see how he’s letting things in more.” - Raúl Esparza

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eccleston · 5 years

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Rafael Barba appreciation ➩ 101/∞ | ep: motherly love ♚ sass king

#svuedit #law and order svu #raul esparza #rafael barba #svu #barba #oodlysvu #barapp #~mine~#18.10 #♥︎#ep: motherly love

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jenniferprentissstuff · 5 years

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#18x10 #motherly love #law and order svu #mariska hartigay #MariskaHargitay #olivia benson #benson #my sc #screen cap

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milquetoast-on-acid · 2 years

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Narcissistic Mom: no I wasn't raped. My son's friend and I were having sex. My son got mad and shot him in the head.

Olivia in the corner:

#that bitch!#knew she was going to throw her own son under the bus to save herself #svu #motherly love #olivia benson

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kat-tamin · 3 years

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under her wing

For Women of SVU Week 2021: Day Four: Kat is Olivia’s Daughter

Note: Rule Breaker! This wasn’t the fanfic prompt for today, but couldn’t help myself. I love mama!Olivia, so here’s just some fluff about Olivia being Kat’s (not-literal) mother.

Word Count: 763

Warnings: None

Did you eat breakfast this morning?

Wear a jacket today, it’s freezing!!

Kat had many mentors and captains over the years on the force and many had texted her when she was on shift.

But no one ever messaged her as much as Captain Benson did. And they never mentioned the weather, or grocery shopping. It was never personal.

Sale on avocados at Whole Foods. Your fave!!

It was a tad overwhelming, to be honest. And very weird.

____

One day, Kat asked Finn: “Does Captain text you a lot?”

He had just shrugged. “A normal amount, I guess.”

“Nothing weird?”

“What are you implying?” Finn leaned back in his chair, squinting.

“Nothing!” Kat said quickly. “I was just wondering. Sorry, Sarge.”

____

Unsatisfied, she turned to Rollins next. “What are your messages with Olivia about?”

Amanda frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Your texts,” Kat clarified. “You guys text a lot, right?”

“We’ve been friends for a long time, yeah.” Amanda showed Kat her phone, Olivia’s name at the top. “Mostly personal stuff. About our kids.”

Kat did a quick swipe, but their content was very different from Kat’s. No mentions of coats, or reminders to eat.

____

Kat even asked Carisi, before a briefing with a victim.

“Nah, they’re mostly about cases. Or the Yankees. Why?”

Kat sighed. “So, she doesn’t tell you to bring mittens and a hat to work?”

“What?” Carisi paused in laying out his paperwork on the table. “No. I have my own mother to do that.”

Kat’s eyes widened. “That’s what it sounds like, doesn’t it? She’s trying to be my mom!”

“Sounds like it.” Carisi said, with a smirk.

“I gotta do something about this,” Kat muttered. One mom was enough, she didn’t need another.

_____

The next day, Kat was ready to have a discussion with Olivia. She knocked on her Captain’s office door, and took a deep, calming breath.

“Come in.”

Kat stuck her head in. “Hey, Cap, got a second?”

“Of course.” Kat’s captain took her glasses off, motioning to the chair across from her. “What’s up?”

Kat sat, feeling like a kid in the principal’s office. She leaned forward in her chair and said very gently: “Well, it’s about the texts.”

Olivia frowned. “Texts?” she repeated.

Kat pulled her phone out, swiping through to diffuse her discomfort. “From you? Um, you seem to be texting a lot.”

“Oh.” To her credit, Olivia’s face remained neutral, not showing if she was hurt.. “I’m sorry, Kat. I’ll try and lay off you a bit.”

“No, it’s fine,” Kat said quickly. “It’s just… they seem a bit… motherly.”

“Motherly?” Olivia’s brow raised in question.

“Like, when you ask me if I had breakfast this morning. Or if I need anything from Costco,” Kat explained, her voice high with nervousness. “It’s kind of what I expect to hear from my mother.”

Olivia smiled, pressing a hand to her face. “Oh, God, Kat. I am so sorry.”

Kat cut her off. “No, it’s totally cool. I just want to know… why?”

Her captain sighed, shaking her head. “I thought it was more of a mentor talk.”

This made Kat’s mouth part in shock. “You were mentoring?”

“Listen, Kat.” Olivia steepled her fingers together, leaning forward over the desk. “You are the first female officer or detective directly under my supervision. I was only a detective when Amanda first started here. So, when you were hired, I thought to myself ‘This is my chance to make another Olivia Benson’. Maybe that’s self-centered, but I was excited.” Olivia motioned to her cell phone. “Maybe a little too excited, and it came across as mothering more than mentoring.”

“Oh.” Kat blinked, comprehension dawning on her. “You want to be like you?”

“No.” Olivia shook her head, and her eyes squinted in a small smile. “I want you to be better. Just like my captain tried to make me better.”

Kat couldn’t help but tease: “Did he text you a lot too?”

Olivia smiled. “I don’t think he even knew how to text. And my sergeant refused to.” She gestured towards the window. “Cell towers, you know?”

Kat laughed, making Olivia grin wider. “I’ll work on it, Kat. I promise,” Oliva said softly.

“That would be appreciated. Thank you.”

Olivia put her glasses back on, suddenly squinting at Kat. “Did you take your break yet? You look tired.”

“Okay, okay.” Kat stood, rolling her eyes. “I’ll go now, mom.”

___

Take the lead on this one. Don’t let them push you around. You got this.

Take an umbrella. It’s supposed to rain.

#WSVU Week #kat tamin #olivia benson #kat x olivia #svu #kat tamin fanfic #fanfic #*

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spexialvixtimxunit · 3 years

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Hii <33 love your blog. So I was SA in the past by my mother's boyfriend but she never believed me and would hit me if I said I didn't like him. Anyways, Law & Order SVU really helps with my anger issues. I was wondering if I can request a platonic Rollins x teen!reader please. Rollins being badass, protective asf and motherly to a shy, anxious teen. Please lmk if you'll accept the request. Thank you so much!

I’m deeply sorry that that happened to you, I’m glad you came to me with this and hopefully you can find a connection to my stories and become a stronger and better person. I’ll consider this but at the moment I’m working on my Christmas countdown list and Kinkmas list but I will definitely write this for you and have it posted as soon as I can. I love you so much darling and proud of you that you had the strength to come to me and tell me a little bit about yourself and how SVU helped you so much. In a way it definitely helped me out when I had a thought time figuring out who I am so I would say we have something in common :) <3 Stay strong! I’ll be thinking about you, sweeatheart.♥️

Sincerely Yours,

Spexialvixtimxunit 😌

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captbenscn-a · 3 years

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What flower are you?

Rose 🌹

You are a hopeless romantic, driven by your heart in everything you do. You likely love classic movies or music, and find inspiration in poetry and lyrics. You dream of living within a story, day dreaming of soulmates and fate. The mom friend, you are a Type A planner who probably has a bit of anxiety. A bit of a night owl, you have always been fascinated with exploring old European cities and imagining the stories that have lived within their streets. You prefer the city over the country, and try to see the best in people. But you have built up your walls high, you do not trust easily. Don't forget to step down from your day dreams and let people prove you wrong my love, it's okay to shed your thorns and let others enjoy your scent.

Okay, but I need to talk about this because it’s VERY accurate. Olivia is definitely driven by her heart - by her compassion and love - and she’s certainly one that believes in soulmates. We’ve SEEN that in the show and in my writing in which eventually, her Elliot believes in it, too. She’s definitely the mom friend, especially as she grows in ranks. SGT, LT, Captain - she becomes protective over her Squad and she takes care of them and she’s always just had this motherly side to her which we’ve seen MULTIPLE times in the show and I love it.

She loves history, she loves old European cities, and this makes sense what with her love for museums and libraries having been an escape for her once upon a time, which she does still love them and enjoying books, but they’re not needed as an escape anymore. It’s just something she loves.

Now building up her walls? Oh, yes. Olivia does/has done that. She doesn’t trust easily, but when she does? She trusts completely. She’s been through a lot that makes her be a little closed up, not to mention being alone most of her life, without a real family, and it’s something she’s so used to. Until she joins the SVU - finding her Squad, finding a family - and more so? Finding Elliot and creating this beautiful life and family with him.

So, yes, I do think this answer definitely works for Olivia, in SO many ways and I just NEEDED to talk about it. And I chose that particular picture because of the way she’s looking at Elliot - like he’s her whole world because he is.

Tagged by: no one, I just saw it.

Tagging: @storiesung (Elliot and Angel) @mctwcsty @herheroics (Erin or Amanda) @surgeonsoath (Amelia) @lcveisweakness (Regina)

#saved #dash games #i love this so much #headcanons #headcanon #about Olivia

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minidodds · 7 years

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Sassy Barba

#raul esparza #rafael barba #svu #svu400 #motherly love #mine

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lovemesomerafael · 5 years

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El Amor Todo Lo Puede Chapter 56: Home

Source: @peter-stone

Chapters 1-55

Laura knocked quietly on the door of Lucia’s apartment in the Bronx, feeling a strange mixture of excitement and sadness. They had kept in touch, of course, for the two years Laura had been away, although after those first, hellish months, they hadn’t spoken quite as often. Laura fully expected that they would spend time during this visit crying over their mutual loss, and she didn’t dread that. In fact, she and Lucia hadn’t been able to hug while they cried in all the time Laura had been gone. Since the crying part was probably inevitable, Laura thought it would be nice to be able to put her arms around Rafael’s mother while they shared their pain.

Lucia had tried to understand Laura’s need to run away. At first, she had been confused and a bit hurt that Laura wouldn’t be in New York, where they could comfort one another. Over the two weeks after Rafi’s death, however, as they had worked feverishly together to do all the horrible tasks that have to be done when someone dies, Lucia had seen in Laura a fear that she herself didn’t feel. Laura was not only grieving the past, she was also terrified of the future. Lucia wasn’t. Partly, the difference was that Laura was young, and had to figure out who to be, now that she had been left without the partner she’d chosen to spend her life with. Rafael’s death had fundamentally changed who Laura was. That wasn’t true for Lucia. Losing her child, adult though he had been, didn’t change Lucia’s identity as his mother. The other difference was that having another child wasn’t an option for Lucia, so she didn’t have to find the courage to try again.

Over the past two years, something had happened that neither of them had expected. As much as they had liked being mother- and daughter-in-law, they found that they also enjoyed being friends. Lucia still felt motherly toward Laura, who also loved Lucia like a second mother. But helping one another through their greatest loss had also forged a deep, lasting friendship between them as women. Rafael was always there, between them, a shared love that united them. But they found that, slowly and in stages, their conversations branched out to involve the rest of their lives, as well. It was a lovely connection that allowed them to keep Rafael close – the two women who had loved him the most – and also allowed each of them to enjoy the other for her own sake.

When Lucia opened the door, she and Laura hugged (and cried) for a very long time before Laura even crossed the threshold.

*************

Dinner at Amanda’s had started at breakfast time. Laura wanted to spend as much time as possible with her friends from SVU, so they’d arranged to meet at the zoo in Central Park, where the kids could play while the parents talked. Laura was shocked by how much they’d grown; both Fin’s grandson, Jaden, and Amanda’s daughter, Billie, were talking already. They weren’t speaking full sentences, but they were certainly able to make their needs known. Amanda’s daughter Jessie and Olivia’s son Noah both had vague memories that they had an “Aunt Lala”, but had really been too young to remember Laura. It was great fun to get re-acquainted with them, and to discover Jaden’s and Billie’s personalities, made easier by the fact that Sonny Carisi was, by far, the kids’ favorite person and knew everything about them. As soon as they saw that Sonny liked Laura, they decided to like her, too.

While the older kids ran around like maniacs and the littler ones alternated between mania and meltdowns, the adults caught up. Laura had cried as soon as she saw Fin, which she’d known she would. He tried to play it cool, but the tightness of his hug and the amount of time it lasted told her he was just as glad to see her.

“Any idea what you’re gonna do when you get back to Chicago?” He asked.

“I have a few leads. I really loved the work I did for the feds; I might want to do something with computer crimes. Or maybe I’ll go to the dark side and make a mint working in cybersecurity. Regular hours, no one shoots at me…”

“Yeah, but you’d never get to go off on anyone. Remember Reginald Skoggs? You love that shit,” Fin laughed.

“Oh, man, I haven’t thought about him in years. But you’re right, that was fun. Remember I had to change my clothes before Barba saw all the blood?”

Fin laughed at that, too, and Laura noticed that the whole group seemed to relax a little, knowing that it was all right to mention Rafael’s name.

“What I remember is you still owe me fifty bucks for not tellin’ Barba what you did.”

Laura feigned a blank look. “I don’t remember that.”

“Yeah, sure you don’t.” Fin threw an arm around her neck and gave her a rough hug. “Punk-ass kid.”

All morning and afternoon, the SVU detectives shared stories of cases they’d worked and listened as Laura told them what she’d been doing. Laura wanted to hear every story about the kids. They had so much to talk about that it was actually after lunch by the time the conversation neared the subject of Rafael’s murder.

Olivia moved so that she was walking next to Laura while they headed toward the Polar Circle, where the penguins – the kids’ favorite - lived.

“I thought we’d get to see you for Randolph’s trial. I wasn’t surprised to see him plead out, but I was sorry to miss out on a visit from you.”

“Thanks, Lieu. I knew he’d take a plea. McCoy was going to bury him no matter what, so I think he just figured he’d save himself the trouble. For a sweet man, Jack McCoy can be a scary SOB when he’s crossed.”

“Yes, he can,” Olivia agreed.

“Anyway, it was better that way. I really wasn’t ready to come back until pretty recently. In fact, I might have stayed longer, except…”

“Yeah, I heard. You know, until Rollins told me the whole story, I just thought you and Stone were oddly close.”

“And you were right about that,” Laura laughed.

While Jaden and Billie napped hard in their strollers, Fin sat with them and napped a little, too. Liv and Amanda kept a close eye on Jessie and Noah, and Laura and Carisi stood leaning on poured concrete rocks, watching the penguins.

“So I’m looking at all these kinds of penguins, particularly the macaroni penguin, which is really the coolest of penguinkind, and I’m thinkin’ that right there is evidence that God has a sense of humor.”

“Hmmmm. Deep, Carisi. I don’t disagree, but I’m thinking whoever named them macaroni penguins gets an honorable mention.”

“Yeah, I could go there,” Sonny shrugged. “And since you didn’t throw me over these rocks into the water, I hope that means that maybe you and God have made up a little?”

Laura thought for a minute. “There was this priest in Stockholm, Father Piär. He helped. Probably not as much as you, but he did OK.” She bumped Carisi fondly with her shoulder.

“I don’t know that I helped any, but thanks.”

“Sure you did. And I appreciate it. I owe you.” Laura didn’t want the day to turn maudlin, so she changed the subject. “So I noticed in your emails, you never mentioned any dates. You didn’t become a monk or something, did you?”

“Nah,” Sonny blushed. “I just like to play things close to the vest, y’know?”

“Well, don’t. Tell me. I want to know you’re happy.”

The smile on Sonny’s face, and the crinkles around his bright blue eyes told Laura that he would never want for romantic companionship for long. “There’s no one special right now, but… I’ve kinda been thinkin’ I’m getting a little old for dates. Dean got married, you know.”

“I hadn’t heard that!”

“Yeah, married a surgeon. They’re in L.A. now. Anyway, I’ve been thinking I might be in the market for someone, you know, more permanent.”

“Any candidates?”

“Not right now. But who knows?”

“Just don’t get serious about anyone until I get to check them out. Don’t rely solely on Amanda’s judgment.”

“If I have to wait until Amanda approves someone, I might as well hang it up right now.”

The rest of the afternoon went on like that, everyone enjoying the day and Laura getting a chance to talk one-on-one with each of them.

At dinner, there was plenty of wine and entirely too much food. Sonny made something no one could pronounce, but it was so good everyone ate until they couldn’t possibly take one more bite. Lucia joined them, and they all enjoyed themselves. To Laura, it felt as though she’d never been away, which was just a little bittersweet, because it meant she kept expecting Rafael to walk in at any time.

There was a sweet moment when Olivia was telling a story about an argument she and Rafael had, and Noah asked, “Is Rafael the same as Uncle Rafa?”

Olivia told him that he was.

“I ‘member him,” Noah said. “He used to sing the pirate song.”

As much as Laura had needed to leave New York to escape the constant reminders of Rafael, it was lovely, now that she could, to be able to talk about him with people who had known and loved him. There were a hundred stories about funny, biting comments he had made, demonstrations of his undeniable abilities, and his courtroom coups. Lucia told some hilarious, adorable stories about him as a child that he would never have allowed her to tell, had he been there. They all laughed, and shed a few tears, and toasted his memory. The entire day was as special as any of them had hoped, and it was a perfect way for Laura to acknowledge the life she had loved in New York before she went on to begin a new life back in Chicago.

Amanda waited with Laura and Lucia at the curb for their taxi back to the Bronx. She and Laura had exchanged many hugs throughout the day, but it still didn’t feel like enough. They sat, side by side on Amanda’s stoop, with Amanda’s arm around Laura’s shoulder.

“Just remember, you need me to shoot Stone, I can make it look like an accident.”

“I thought it was Rafael you offered to shoot.”

“It was, but you never took me up on it, so I still owe you. But I’m kinda hopin’ you don’t ever need me to shoot Stone, either. ‘Cuz you look happy. And I like seein’ that.”

“Me, too.”

“You take care of yourself, Parker. You know you always have a home here, if you want it.”

They hugged yet again, both smiling, and Amanda pulled Lucia into the hug with them.

**********

The flight from New York to Chicago had seemed very short after the flight from Stockholm. And now, Laura was home. She smiled even as tears spilled over, looking out the window of the airplane at the familiar landscape.

She walked through the concourse toward Baggage Claim. She reached the main terminal, passed the security checkpoint, and descended the stairs toward the row of baggage carousels, some surrounded by people and spitting out luggage which then circled slowly, some still and silent. She idly looked out over the scene as she walked down the stairs.

She froze on the last step, her heart doing some sort of somersault in her chest and a large swarm of butterflies taking sudden flight in her stomach. She whispered an involuntary, "Peter."

She stood, unmoving, staring at the tall, beautiful man standing near the baggage carousel for her flight. As always, his muscular, athletic build and his square, masculine jaw stirred a deep longing in her. She stared almost helplessly at him, just as she had done that day years before, when she saw him in the lobby at District 21, waiting for an appointment with Sergeant Voight. She realized with a surge of love that the pain of missing Peter was over. She was home now, with him, and there was no longer anything to keep them apart.

His hair was longer than it had been when she’d last seen him. It looked so good she instantly wanted to run her hands through it. Had he let it grow for her, knowing she liked it that way? Only when he looked up at her, perhaps sensing her staring at him, did Laura take the last stair and begin to move through the crowd toward him as his face broke into a wide smile.

They didn’t say anything at first as they came face to face, just took a moment to smiled at one another before they wrapped their arms around each other in a long, contented embrace. People looked at them, some annoyed at these fools locked in a marathon hug in the middle of baggage claim, some grinning shyly at the apparently very happy reunion. Peter and Laura ignored them all. Somewhere in the middle of their embrace, they began to share whispered “I love you’s” among heartfelt endearments.

There were plenty of kisses and laughing as they collected Laura’s luggage and walked, talking animatedly, out to Peter’s car. With so much to carry - suitcases, Laura’s guitar, her carry-on - they hadn’t been able to hold hands or put arms around each other as they walked, and with each step, Laura found herself more aware of wanting to touch Peter. She noticed again his hair, just a bit shaggy, and the way it made her think of him in bed. She watched the sexy way he walked, so athletic and confident, legs wide and striding quickly. As Peter stored the luggage in the back of a new SUV he’d purchased at some point after he’d returned from New York, Laura stood close to him, just wanting to be near him and eager to have her arms around him again.

He slammed the gate down and pulled her to him. As he leaned down to press his lips to hers, she breathed in his scent: a clean, masculine smell of soap and a little bit of musky cologne highlighting a warmer, savory essence that Laura thought of as just plain man. She reached up, sliding one hand into the hair at the back of his head and using the other to hold him close. As their mouths met in heated haste, Peter’s arms encircling Laura completely, she felt herself pressed against the back of the vehicle. She moved her legs to more fully melt their bodies together, feeling lust overcoming her sense of anything beyond Peter. He felt warm and firm, large and muscular, the beginnings of his erection evident as he moved against her.

He broke the kiss when they started to lose control of the sounds being drawn from them and the wantonness of their hip movements.

“Get in the car,” he growled, and they quickly separated to slide into their seats. Before even thinking about putting on seat belts, they turned to each other and their mouths met once again for the kind of kisses they really wanted, but couldn’t indulge in publicly. Their intimate caresses became quickly more serious, more heated, and soon they were both moaning as Peter’s tongue teased Laura’s. Minutes later, Laura slid a hand up the inside of Peter’s thigh.

He took her hand from his leg, lifting it to his lips and kissing her fingers, chuckling. “You missed me.”

“I missed you like crazy. And I want you. Let me…”

“Not here.”

“Please? We could get in the back…”

“I am not going to have sex with you in an airport parking garage,” Peter said, a little more gruffly than he meant to, because he was having some trouble resisting her suggestion in his current agitated state.

“It wouldn’t be the first time. I think it was even this garage. Remember when you went -“

“That was… We were in our twenties then.” He consciously tried to slow his breathing.

“And? What are you, a grown-up now?” Laura leaned in and began kissing Peter’s neck, slipping her hand from his and reaching toward his crotch. “Come on. I love you, and I’ve been thinking about you nonstop. Let me touch you…” she purred.

“Stop,” he said, laughing but taking her hand again. “I mean it. You can do anything you want to me when we get home. Now behave.”

She moved back into her seat, pretending to be grumpy as she fastened her seat belt. “Behave. Since when have I ever behaved?”

“Just be patient. I’ll make it worth your while.” Peter gave her a look that did nothing to cool her arousal. “I promise.”

Seeing that he wasn’t going to relent, Laura settled into her seat, smiling contentedly. “It’s good to be home.”

“It’s good to have you home,” Peter agreed, reaching for her hand and intertwining his fingers with hers.

The city looked beautiful to Laura, even in the dreariness of late fall. There was a weak sunlight through breaks in the clouds, and there were still some trees with bright fall foliage here and there. Mostly, the city looked good to her because she had been homesick. She noticed a new building going up on the downtown skyline and pointed it out to Peter, asking where, exactly, it was. When he told her, she scrunched up her eyebrows. “Wait, doesn’t that mean… didn’t you miss your exit? I thought you lived in the Fulton River District.”

“I did,” he responded, looking at the road. “I moved.”

“You moved? You didn’t tell me you moved. When did you move?”

“A few months ago. Didn’t I tell you?”

“No. How do you move, and not tell me?”

“I must’ve forgot. I told you, I’ve been crazy busy these last few months.”

Laura frowned. This was strange. Moving is not something you forget to mention. “Where do you live now?”

“Wilmette.”

“Wilmette! You do not.”

Peter smiled and chuckled a little, but kept his eyes on the road. “I do, actually. You’ll see.”

“Peter, you… that’s… I can’t believe you moved to Wilmette and didn’t tell me.”

“I thought you liked Wilmette?”

“I do. We both do. Remember, we used to talk about living there someday. That’s why I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.”

“I’m sorry, Sunshine. Really. I guess I thought I had.” He lifted her hand from the console where their clasped hands had been resting and kissed it for about the hundredth time since they’d left O’Hare.

Laura shrugged slightly, but she was still uneasy. He had told her that he’d been extremely busy over the months since he’d visited her in Stockholm, and with all that had happened between them, maybe he really had forgotten. But it still struck her as a very strange thing not to mention.

Several miles later, Peter exited the freeway and drove through the Village of Wilmette, a clean, leafy, cute midwestern town with lots of small shops and other businesses lining the streets. He turned into a neighborhood of pretty houses, many of them brick, all set back from the street behind well-maintained front lawns with trees and shrubs. Most of the houses had flower gardens up next to their foundations, although this late in the year there weren’t any flowers blooming. He turned into an idyllic, peaceful street and began to slow down.

“You’re messing with me,” she said. “You bought a house?”

“Yeah,” he said, pulling over against the curb. “We’re here.”

The house he pointed to was two a story brick, with copper awnings covered with verdigris over bay windows, one on either side of a rounded front door that sat at the top of a set of two steps. There was a little patio in front of the door with wrought iron railings on either side. There was a chimney to one side, and it looked like there was another chimney at the back. Peter got out of the car and came around to open Laura’s door as she simply sat and stared.

“Do you like it?” He asked, a sweet, expectant smile on his face that almost hid a glint of mischief in his eyes.

Laura stepped out onto the curb and stood, looking at the charming house. “You didn’t forget to tell me you bought a house.”

He shrugged, pleased with her reaction. “Maybe not. Maybe I wanted it to be a surprise.”

“Peter, this is your house? It’s beautiful! It’s perfect! You really live here?”

“Got the mortgage to prove it,” he said, taking her hand. “C’mon. I want to show it to you. We’ll get the luggage later.”

When they reached the door, he opened it and then turned to her and lifted her up with one arm behind her back and one behind her legs.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m carrying you over the threshold.”

All Laura could think to do was laugh. This was… bizarre. Unreal.

They stood in a small foyer with a flagstone floor, a little table with a lamp on it just inside. Something about the table or the lamp, or maybe both, looked familiar to her, but she was so curious to see Peter’s house that she didn’t give it much thought. The foyer gave onto a short hallway.

The first room they came to was a formal living room with a couch and some wingback chairs arranged around a fireplace. There was something about the room that seemed… Then she noticed the painting of a cottage in the English countryside over the fireplace.

“I have that same painting,” she said, her voice a little unsure. “I’ve never noticed that in your apartments, did you just get it?”

“Sort of. Let me show you the rest of the house.”

He led her past the living room to the end of the short hall, which opened onto a large, sunny great room at the back of the house. The room had a pleasant kitchen separated by a span of granite countertop from a family area with another fireplace. Laura was astounded, her head swimming at the surprise of Peter owning a house in Wilmette, and the perfectness of the house itself.

“Oh, Peter, this is great! It’s… I love it! Is this actually a wood-burning fireplace?”

“Yep.”

Again, Laura had an odd feeling about the room. It seemed like she’d been there before.

“This is so weird. I’m having the weirdest sense of déjà vu. I know I’ve never been here before… Holy shit, I know what it is!”

She turned to him to find him grinning like a fool.

“Peter, your house is just like the one we used to talk about. Remember? When we lived in that fifth-floor walk-up in Evanston. Now all you need is a dog named Marshall.”

Peter, now actually laughing, cocked his head toward a sliding glass door that led from the kitchen out to a patio. “Back yard.”

Laura felt herself go numb. Her eyes got big and she just stood where she was, a confused expression on her face. Her voice was shaky as she asked, “What’s going on?”

Peter went to the door and opened it. “Come on. Meet Marshall.”

She almost stumbled as she moved, uncertain and overwhelmed, over to him. He put an arm around her back, enjoying every second of her reaction, but a little worried this might all be a bit too much. He led her out onto the wooden patio, which had two sets of steps down to a small back yard shielded from any neighbors by high hedges. She noticed movement to one side, and her eyes fixed on a red doghouse from which a Yellow Labrador Retriever puppy was sleepily emerging. The puppy saw Peter and ran to the stairs, a little small yet to climb them easily.

“Oh, look at you! You’re so cute!” Laura hurried over to pick up the puppy, who immediately began to lick all over her face. She looked at Peter, eyes still wide, confusion and disbelief still very much evident. “How old is he?”

“She is about three months old.”

“You named a girl puppy Thurgood Marshall?”

“I had to. That’s the name we picked out.”

“I… what?”

Laura had just enough presence of mind to notice that Peter’s smile was heartrendingly handsome. He was looking at her, holding the puppy, as though he was a child on Christmas morning catching his first sight of what Santa had brought.

“C’mon, let’s sit here for a minute.” He sat her down on the stairs that led from the deck to the yard and settled next to her, their legs touching for their full lengths and his arm around her.

“You OK?” He chuckled.

“I… You bought a house.” She looked up at him just as the shocked, confused look on her face was replaced by something else. “That picture.”

“Hmmmm?” He asked, grinning again.

“That’s mine, isn’t it?”

“It was. Now it’s ours.”

“Did you…? What did you do?”

“We moved you in. Everything you had in storage, we moved in here. This is your house. Well, our house.” The grin became a radiant smile.

“Our house.”

“That’s right. You live here. With me.”

Peter realized he should have found a way to record this moment. Her face was registering every emotion that tumbled through her head. He would have liked to be able to watch it again and again, for the rest of his life.

“But… Who’s ‘we’? Who helped you move everything in?”

“Do you really have to ask that question? I could never have finished getting everything ready for you if your whole family hadn’t helped.”

“Our family.”

“I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to say. Peter, this is…” She reached for him. “I’ve been telling you for twenty years that I love you, but I’ve never loved you like I do now. And not just because you bought me a house. I don’t know how to say a bigger I love you, but… I love you bigger! They don’t have a word for how I feel about you. So how am I supposed to tell you?” Laura’s eyes were overflowing with tears as she laughed into Peter’s shoulder.

“I know how,” he said quietly.

Marshall had been frolicking around their feet as they sat on the stair, and Peter reached out to her, taking hold of a little white ribbon tied to her collar, which Laura hadn’t really noticed. He untied it and something that had been attached to it fell into his hand. As he reached behind himself to take Laura’s left hand, she gasped. He pulled her hand to him and held a small gold band with a solitary diamond shining in the middle just off the end of her ring finger.

Laura laughed again through her tears and said, “Yes. Yes, yes, YES!”

Peter laughed, too. “Always so impatient. I haven’t asked you yet.”

He took a deep breath, wanting to give this moment the seriousness it deserved. As he looked into her eyes, he said, “I love you, Laura. Will you marry me? Will you make a family with me? Be the mother of my children?”

“Yes,” she whispered, suddenly unable to speak.

She watched as he slipped the ring onto her finger. “Peter,” she gasped, “Is this… This is… This is our ring. From before.”

“Yeah, I know. We’ll get a real one, I just needed one to propose with.”

“We will not get a real one,” she cried, suddenly finding her voice as she threw her arms around him again. “This is the real one. You kept this ring, all these years… You will have to pry this ring off my finger.”

For the next several minutes, Marshall became increasingly excited because Peter and Laura were paying no attention to her. They were too focused on each other, laughing, hugging, kissing, and telling each other over and over how much they loved each other.

“Peter, stop. I can’t! This is too much. I’m gonna explode or have some sort of neurological event from happiness overload…” Laura laughed breathlessly. “How many of my dreams are you planning to make come true?

“All of them,” he answered. “Didn’t I tell you?”

#law & order svu #law & order: special victims unit #chicago pd #chicago fire #chicago med #chicago justice #peter stone #philip winchester #rafael barba #raul esparza

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