#tachihara telling himself that this is all just for the government job?

[no-brain-just-akutagawa]

I thought let's write a fic about higuchi and tachihara running into each other during the events of dead apple and I think I ship them now ksjvhcks

[tetcho-apologist]

Baking contest with the hunting dogs

It came to me in a dream, has a bit of reader x tachihara but also tried to add a bit Tecchou x reader and jouno x reader near the end.  i don’t have anything better to do so enjoy the daily posts  (˚▽˚)

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Chaos. Pure chaos

Whose idea was this? Apparently, Fukuchi thought it was a good idea to agree to make all the hunting dogs, and you participate in a baking contest show to support a fundraiser. Since it was a charity event, you couldn't refuse. —--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The contest was in pairs. Tecchou and Jouno, Fukuchi and Teruko, and finally Tachihara and you. You weren't exactly a member of the hunting dogs, more like their secretary or assistant. Your job was making appointments, setting up meetings, and occasionally helping the members with personal matters. But this? None of it was included in the contract you signed. When they announced the contest was in pairs, they asked you to join them since they were 5 and needed 6 to ensure everyone had a partner. After hearing the rules, Teruko immediately jumped to Fukuchi. Tachihara being aware of Tecchou’s unfortunate food preferences and Jouno´s attitude asked you to be his partner. Thus, Jouno was forced left to be Tecchou’s partner. —--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tachihara and you had practiced a few times baking some cupcakes and decorating them, but you still had a long way to go if you wanted to win. Since it was a fundraiser no prizes like money were included, but the team that won would be carried by the other members for a whole week, definitely not Terukos idea. To be honest, nobody really cared that much for the carrying thing, but if the vice-captain lost it would mean your backs would be safe for at least a week. You would have been fine if Jouno won, but after he told you he would still make you guys carry him, war was on. If team Teruko and Fukuchi didn’t add any weird liquor or candy in their cupcakes their chances of winning weren’t too bad, and if Jouno wasn’t too busy yelling at Tecchou he might also make for a formidable opponent.

—--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was finally the day! You had changed into the outfit made specifically for the event. Each team wore a different color outfit, so the judges could tell them apart. It was certainly a sight to see the commander sport a hot pink coat and toque, courtesy of Teruko. Jouno and Tecchou took a slightly more traditional approach and went with black. Tachihara suggested the color red, you agreed, thinking the color suited you both well.

—-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Presently, each team stood at their respective table. The organizers had really gone all out while decorating, it looked exactly like those cooking competition shows you liked to watch in your free time. " Everyone, please settle down! " Cried the host, who had introduced himself as Francis, one of the organizers of the event. "We will now be beginning, but before that let me introduce the judges for today" "First up Ranpo Edogawa, a self-proclaimed king of sweets," he said while pointing to a man dressed up in what appeared to be a detective costume who was eating a lollipop. " Next up, Ango Sakaguchi a government worker" did they just pick up random people from the street? The man named Ango looked as if he hadn’t slept for 3 days. "Our final judge being Elise, don’t be fooled by her cute appearance out of the three judges she is the most brutal" great another Teruko The three judges sat at a table that was put on the stage, and looked as if they were discussing something "The theme for today will be to make cupcakes that look like dogs!" exclaimed the judge ranpo "begin now" added the girl Elise —--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Your table had numerous ingredients and tools scattered all around, but before grabbing any of that you had to choose what ingredients you’d be using. " What flavor should we make them," you asked "what about red velvet, not too basic but not too unusual" And with that, you began.

—--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It all was going smoothly until you witnessed Fukuchi putting a whole bottle of vodka into his mix, Teruko only encouraged him to add more. From there, it only kept getting worse. The predictable also happened, Tecchou put some weird stuff into his dough with the excuse it was the same color, therefore it would go well. Jouno screamed at him, but he only added more odd stuff. Tachihara and you had to resist laughing since you were decorating your cupcakes and didn't want to mess up. When the time was almost over, Jouno snapped and threw some frosting at Tecchou who only seemed confused. Teruko being mischievous decided to add fuel to the fire by throwing some of her cupcakes at you and Jouno, starting the great cupcake war. Tachihara grabbed your hand and ran to take cover under a table, not without some frosting to throw at victims. By the end of it, all of you were covered from head to toe in frosting. —--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Team Teruko and Fukuchi were disqualified since they had sacrificed some of their cupcakes, they looked rather joyful, however. As soon as the judges took a bite out of Tecchou’s and Jouno’s they looked horrified, they instantly spat out the gross cupcakes. Finally, it was your turn, after eating your cupcakes the judges announced you as the winners. Ranpo said the flavor was tasty and Elise complemented the design choice, a dog with chocolate chips as eyes and snout, Ango fell asleep after taking a bite out the cupcake.

—-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- You shared some of your leftover cupcakes with the other teams Tecchou and you sat eating some frosting by a corner when he wiped some chocolate frosting off your lips with his finger, he was totally oblivious to his gesture because he didn’t seem to notice your flustered face. Jouno also pulled a similar stunt by feeding you some chocolate chips that he didn’t want in his cupcake. —-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- After receiving your trophy and taking some pictures, Tecchou and Jouno carried you, while Fukuchi and Teruko carried Tachihara. It was a fun day, but next time you would remember to assign different teams to avoid disaster.

[animemangasoul]

5 times Tachihara is shocked by people kissing his co-worker on the cheek and one time he does it himself

Chapter: 6/6 -  Tachihara

Gin was a girl.  

Leaning back against the hospital chair he’d dragged over next to her bed, Tachihara sighed, clammy hands folded across his lap as he let the realization wash over him in defeated surprise.  

Gin was a girl  

Everyone had known. Or at least according to Hirotsu, everyone of importance had known or figured it out and here he was, a government spy and he’d known nothing.  

‘Maybe I didn’t want to know,’  he thought; tired hand running through his hair as he let his eyes skim over his--  her sleeping frame. ‘Maybe not knowing made things.... would make things easier?’    

His stomach flipped and his chest tightened and..... yeah—maybe not.  

Gin.... a woman.  

Gin his best friend. His partner. His confidant. His Gin.  

Maybe secrets were just an ingrained part of their friendship. Sewn into the very fabric of who they were. Maybe he shouldn’t have been surprised. Not when he himself has been keeping this larger than life betrayal under his--- her nose.  

His Gin.  

When he’d signed up for this job. When he’d been so ready to get it done. When he’d joined the mafia fully intending to betray and stab them in the back. When---  

He’d never thought.....  

They were his family. They’d become his family and now.... He’d just went out of his way to save two them. Hirotsu and Gin. Gin and Hirotsu.... How long could he keep this under wraps? How long could he keep it from the Hunting Dogs? Hell, how long could he keep this from his squad? Would they ever see him the same way ever again? Did he even deserve....  

‘No,’ he thought; eyes narrowing as they skipped between both sleeping figures. ‘I did nothing wrong. They are both criminals. Their hands are stained red with the blood of innocents. I... they don’t deserve my pity or sympathy. They should count themselves lucky that I’m even---’    

“A penny for your thoughts?”  

He startled, gaze snapping to meet the hazy one’s of Gin. Gaping, it took Tachihara a second to wrap his head around that he—she was awake and...  

A quiet snort. “Tachihara?”  

“Yeah?” It comes out more like a breathless whisper and only seems to make the pale woman even more amused. But...  

“What are you thinking about?”  

“It’s so strange to hear you talk.” The words tumble out of his mouth before he can even stop them and he winces in discomfort, but it only serves to amuse his partner even more.  

“There is no point in hiding my voice now,” she says, finger tracing random patterns on the covers. “I’m pretty sure you already know that I’m not a guy anymore and we’re not on a mission so....”  

He swallows thickly. Mild bitterness lodged in his throat that he’s too afraid to say out loud because---  

‘Why did it matter if he’d known? Everyone else did. And he’d looked like a fool. This whole-time  and.... but what right did he have to demand answers when he himself was.... what right did he have? ’    

“It’s just weird,” he finally said; careful not to let the emotions bleed through his words. And oh how good he was at doing that. Professional. “I’m not used to it, is all.”  

She smiles and....  

How could he have thought she was anything else but a woman? Beautiful as she was laying there staring up at him with those all-knowing eyes. He.... what if he’d lost her?  

Was everything he’d been working towards, the vengeance, the hatred, the bitterness... were they all worth Gin’s life? His partner, his friend? Would it have been worth it?  

“You’re thinking too much,” Gin interrupts his train of thoughts. “It’s not like you.”  

Oh if only she knew.  

He shrugs. “Weird times I guess.” She hums and he smiles.  

“I should probably get out there and help or something,” he added when the silence between them becomes almost too comfortable; he didn’t deserve that. He didn’t deserve her companionship. Not after what he did. “The boss might need some extra hands.”  

“Of course. Be careful out there, partner.”  

It was as if a knife was stabbed into his heart and suddenly it became too painful to breath.  

‘Traitor,’  his mind whispered; cruel, vindictive, hurtful. 'Traitor.’    

At this point Tachihara didn’t even know which side it was speaking about.  

Taking a deep breath he pulled the waves back from the shore and locked them down. ‘Not today,’ he thought. He wouldn’t lose it today. He couldn’t.  

Finally feeling like he got himself under control, he lifted his gaze to meet Gin’s, smiling to assuage her worry. “Will do, partner!”  

Gin didn’t seem convinced by his cherry tone but....  

Standing up he brushed invisible dust of his pants and grinned, before leaning over lightening quick and planting a gentle kiss on her cheek. Gin didn’t look startled, and by the slight crease of a dimple that his lips brushed against, she was smiling. He found himself smiling too before he quickly turned away and darted out the room. “Wish me luck!”  

She doesn’t. But that doesn’t matter.  

Tachihara was going to do the right thing.  

For himself.  

For Gin.  

For his family.  

So that one day he could look her in the eye and tell her how he truly felt. Cheeks warm and chest heavy with a resolution too big to execute without sacrifice he walked forward.  

It was time to leave the past behind.

The End

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6

[corruptedsorrows]

what do you think of chuuyaxdazai? chuuyaxatsushi? chuuyaxakutagawa? chuuyaxyasano? chuuyaxranpo? chuuyaxkunikida? chuuyaxtachihara? chuuyaxango? chuuyaxtsujimura? chuuyaxodasaku?

   Heck that’s a lot of ships anon. I guess the easiest way would be to put them in a sort of number ranking and explain my reasoning, yes? Let’s go with that. 

   So the range is 0 - 10, 10 is OTP/intensely shipped and loved, 0 is absolute NOTP, don’t bring it near me with a 20 foot pole. Sound good? Alright let’s go! 

(read more because this is a titan of a post)

ChuuyaxDazai

Hnnngh… my grandmaster of BSD ships. I don’t think it should come as much surprise to anyone here that this is my OTP, ranking an easy 10/10 ship. There is so much complexity and depth to these two I could rant for hours, but I’ll hold my tongue. I will say at the very least, with this being my OTP I am honestly quite choosy about who I open my heart to with it.

I want to explore all facets of this ship, not just jump straight into romance and smut (although yes, I do like it). More than anything I want to explore the drama between them. I want to have fun shenanigans of teasing and their childish banter. I want Chuuya to understand the shit that goes through Dazai’s head and pull him back from the cliff he’s drawn to–if only for a moment. Chuuya knows how much his head tortures him now, he understands that after having spent so long together. He knows he absolutely isn’t the cure Dazai needs, but he can’t help longing for it. The double edged sword of always being the one passed over for Dazai certainly doesn’t make admitting what he feels towards the man any easier to understand. Why should he want to be involved with the person he’s always being compared to? 

This sort of depth is what I’m looking for in anyone that wants to RP this ship with me. I want to dive into the core of SKK and swim in those troubled waters. I want them to fight and scream at each other, to reach their limits and break down as the finally have their masks shattered. These two know each other to such a depth–even with all of their bad blood that they can still understand each other’s thoughts and actions without speaking on it. They can still trust each other with their lives and know that even though everyone else they thought they could trust–that may have even shown kindness towards them, has let them fall. No matter how badly these two fall out with each other, they’ll never let the other fall past the point of being saved. At the end of the day they’ll be the one outstretching their hands to catch each other.

ChuuyaxAtsushi

I WANT TO RP WITH AN ATSUSHI SO FRICKING BADLY. As the brutality of SSKK I want Chuuya to mentor Atsushi and work with him on accepting his ability. Chuuya’s gone through so much of the same strife and struggle I think these two could understand each other very well. Granted, they’d probably clash on the surface given how little patience Chuuya has for those too afraid to fight (it’s the Port Mafia way), but knowing Atsushi’s fears about hurting others with his ability and being afraid of it he understands very well. He knows what it’s like to feel like a monster, to be transformed into something when everyone else’s ability is merely an extension of themselves. It’s different when you become something instead of wield it. 

I want these two to have these talks so badly, and I sincerely hope Kafka will give us this content because I think Atsushi could stand to grow so much under Chuuya’s guidance. Again, like Akutagawa I view these more on a familial/mentor relationship, but I think unlike Akutagawa, Chuuya would be able to dote on Atsushi more and be allowed to express himself in more heartfelt ways–like hugs and gentle hair brushes… things like that. I’d put these two at 6/10. 

ChuuyaxAkutagawa

Oh Akutagawa… while I don’t really ship these two, I like to think of Chuuya as something like the replacement for Akutagawa. I don’t think Chuuya did a very good job considering how much Akutagawa still pines for Dazai’s attention, but Chuuya understands that pinning at least. He knows how painful it was for Akutagawa when Dazai left suddenly, and seeing how Dazai’s effectively replaced them all with ADA equivalents must hurt like hell to him. I love having Chuuya as a source of comfort for Akutagawa, but I don’t romantically ship them together. This would be more of a familial/mentor relationship and I prefer it that way between them. 4/10.

ChuuyaxYosano

I WANT THESE TWO TO GET PLASTERED IN A BAR TOGETHER! Chuuya and Yosano would be THE BEST drinking buddies and no one can tell me otherwise! I think these two have decent potential as romantic partners–but there’s a huge problem between them–and that would be Mori. Yosano can’t stand the idea of him and Chuuya has dedicated his life to servitude under him. There would be so many arguments and fights over this that it would be a serious point of contention between them. 

I would love to see though… if one day they got on well enough for Yosano to truly see the damage Corruption has done to Chuuya. It’s something she wouldn’t be able to heal from how long its existed in his system. She could of course heal him if he were in a state of Corruption that lasted long enough to put his life in jeopardy, but otherwise Chuuya would be one of the few cases where she simply wouldn’t be able to heal someone and could only watch them waste away with each use like a fatal disease. What sort of affect would that have on her I wonder? 6/10.

ChuuyaxRanpo

Ok this is admittedly a guilty ship for me. I honestly didn’t realize how much I would ship this until I actually started RPing here and got to interact with an amazing Ranpo. I think it’s enjoyable because in many ways Ranpo is like Dazai as far as intellect is concerned. While Chuuya doesn’t have background with Ranpo, the man is able to easily cut through Chuuya’s bullshit and pride in order to get to the heart of what Chuuya is really feeling. And he teases Chuuya about just as badly and as a MUN I’m horribly weak to my muses being teased. I would put these two at about 8/10? 

As much as Ranpo is able to give Chuuya by means of healing and growth, I’m not sure how much Chuuya would be able to give Ranpo in return. He’s certainly not the best intellectual companion, but maybe that’s what Ranpo finds amusing. He can indulge in simpler things and not have to overthink all the time.

ChuuyaxKunikida

I don’t think Chuuya would ever meet any of Kunikida’s ideals so 0/10. No, I’m kidding! I think these two would fit really nicely together as work friends–even though they’re on opposite sides. They have one extreme headache in common and it would be nice for them to just chat out their frustrations over drinks at a bar. Kunikida may just have to step down from his high horse a bit to be able to stoop to casual conversation with the enemy. I’d give them a 2/10. I’m not much for a romantic ship for them, but friendos? YES PLEASE!!!

ChuuyaxTachihara

At first I was like, ah… they’re good bros. Just what Chuuya needs, a best friend that he can confide in. And then Tachihara was revealed as a spy and member of the Hunting Dogs, betraying Port Mafia and I just tiorewihtwfoilahflidu. CHUUYA APPARENTLY ISN’T ALLOWED TO HAVE ANY FRIENDS OR FAMILY JFC. When’s Kouyou handing in her notice at this rate?! However, Tachihara’s leaving of Port Mafia, and his compounded feelings towards them definitely added a nice level of spice for me with this ship, giving it room to have less bromantic feelings and more romantic. 

I enjoy them as an angst ship and I so yearn for that confrontation between them. I enjoy ships that have a lot of work to be done and aren’t smooth sailing–but there’s potential. There has to be some foundation there that holds them together, and in this case it’s that former friendship. So for these too I’d now say that they’re at 6/10.

ChuuyaxAngo

This is quite honestly a ship I struggle to understand as far as how it would work. I see how they could get on with being mutually misunderstood by both their organizations and suffering as a result of their abilities but Chuuya has so much animosity towards Ango for all that he has done and what he represents by working for the Special Abilities Division. Hell, Ango has even referred to Chuuya by his number, making him feel even less human when he already struggles with that concept so much in his life. I truly don’t see these two working together and think they would be far better off with others. 2/10.

ChuuyaxTsujimura

In perfectly good honesty I have not read the spin off novel for the Special Ability Division. However, Chuuya would likely feel very similar to her in the way he does Ango. Chuuya HATES the government with a burning passion for what they put him through. While Tsujimura does seem to have a considerably bigger heart, Chuuya would likely not be able to stand her due to her affiliation not only with the Division, but working directly with Ango as well. Strangely enough though, I do think her concern for Chuuya’s well being would warm his heart quite a bit. It’s rare for anyone to show compassion towards the danger he throws himself into so… on that merit alone it gives her quite an advantage: 6/10

ChuuyaxOdasaku

Again, Chuuya once more doesn’t get on with someone in this listing. It’s an unfortunate pattern. He blames Oda for convincing Dazai to betray the organization and leave, so Oda is in his own way a traitor in Chuuya’s eyes. However, he can also see how Oda’s influence has changed Dazai for the better, and he’s grateful for that. Chuuya’s feelings towards him went from jealous friend, to enemy, to a father figure he wished he could’ve had. Dazai was very lucky to have had someone to teach him in his life for so long. So if anything, it would be more of a paternal/familial ship with Oda and it would certainly be complicated. I’d place this at about… 3/10?

[musicprincess655]

Sometimes, Ryuu still dreams about the fire.

It was all-encompassing. One minute he was with Gin, running around in the forest, singing to each other in a way that made the animals sit up and take notice. They both knew they would have a home to return to, parents that would take care of them. A life worth living

And then, they woke up, and their whole world was ablaze with a fire that would take it all away from them.

Gin still has burn scars on her back. Ryuu’s wounds run a little deeper, the smoke leaving deep scars on his lungs, and now he struggles to even breathe.

But in spite of what they lost in the blaze, in spite of how they still carry the marks on their bodies, Ryuu and Gin survived. They got out of that forest.

And then they started running.

They were hunted down on all sides, chased by people they couldn’t recognize, always trying to find a new place to hide. Ryuu tried to protect Gin, he really did. He was supposed to look after his little sister. He’d been too small to hold her when she’d been born, but their parents had still insisted it was his job to protect her.

And Ryuu failed.

He and Gin got separated. It wasn’t anyone’s fault. It was just that Ryuu’s lungs stopped working, desperate and gasping for air, and he had to stop to let them recover. Gin had kept on running, and then she’d been too far away for him to see, and then she’d been gone.

And then No. 6 found him.

Ryuu doesn’t know what the rest of the Correctional Facility looks like, but he does know the labs in the center intimately. It’s a place only Chuuya understands the full horrors of, because only Chuuya was there too, although years before Ryuu ever set foot within the walls.

The scientists were fascinated by him. They poked him, prodded him, called him a Singer with a capital S. Ryuu didn’t know what that means, doesn’t know even now. All he has is a song running through his dreams, the one he used to sing to himself in the lab to stop his fears, the one he still sometimes sings when someone dies.

That Ryuu escaped was nothing short of a miracle. He was being transferred between one part of the facility and another, and the number of guards was just short enough that he could shoot one with his own gun and escape the rest. The bullet wound on his arm was a small price to pay, or so he thought.

As it turned out, escaping wasn’t all that easy. He could run into the sewers, but he didn’t have a plan, his run for freedom so spontaneous that he hadn’t bothered to think of one. He was lost, disoriented, completely out of his depth. All he could do was keep running forward, but with the blood running down his arms and the piercing pain in his chest, Ryuu couldn’t keep going like this.

When he emerged from the sewers, the first things he heard was a scream.

Nakajima Atsushi was like nobody Ryuu had ever met before. He was weak, trembling in fear when they passed by the open office door on the way to the kitchen. But he hadn’t been afraid of Ryuu. Even when Ryuu knew Atsushi had seen the news report, had seen the truth of who Ryuu was, known what the consequences of helping him would be, Atsushi hadn’t wavered once.

All that fear was nowhere to be found when Ryuu held a knife to his throat.

Atsushi calmed him like an injured animal, asked him for his name, gave it to him like no one had since Ryuu lost Gin. Atsushi bandaged his wounds with whatever he could find, made them both a simple meal that was obviously more than he’d eaten that day. Atsushi was tiny, hungry and scared, Atsushi had nothing.

Atsushi still gave what he could to Ryuu.

He even gave Ryuu a place to sleep off his rising fever, and that, more than anything else, was the reason Ryuu escaped. One night of kindness gave him the strength to keep running until he found his way to the West Block, back to the sister he had lost, and to two men who had become the closest thing either of them had to family now.

Ryuu knows, objectively, that it’s not Atsushi’s fault he got all wrapped up in the worst memories Ryuu has. He was an innocent bystander in Ryuu’s flight from the most horrific place in No. 6, and while he’s a bright spot in those memories, Ryuu can’t separate the chazuke and the warmth from the pain of a bullet in his arm.

But he wasn’t going to hold that against Atsushi. He never intended to be friends, not really. Ryuu doesn’t have those, and that’s fine. He was going to let Atsushi live his life in the West Block, and if Atsushi’s weakness was too much for him to survive, Ryuu would have sung him to sleep just like Kyouka sometimes asked him to sing for her dogs.

That was the plan, anyway. But then Atsushi got Dazai’s approval just for existing.

Ryuu has worked so hard for so many years for that approval, and all for nothing. Dazai had just been so cool the day Ryuu met him, protecting Ryuu from a few people who had seen his obvious weakness, the fever that hadn’t quite left his body yet, the bandages on his arm. Dazai had been there, and nobody had been able to stand up to him and Chuuya.

Ryuu knows he has Chuuya’s approval. Chuuya understands his anger in a way even Gin can’t, and Chuuya has never held it against him. Gin and Dazai don’t much care whether No. 6 lives or dies, but Ryuu and Chuuya would see it burn for the wrongs it has committed against them. Beyond that, Chuuya cares, sometimes so much that Ryuu doesn’t understand how his body doesn’t explode with the force of it. He has picked the three most difficult people in the world to love, and he does it anyway.

Most people don’t see what Chuuya and Dazai have for love. Atsushi certainly didn’t when he first showed up. Ryuu isn’t sure if Atsushi sees it now. But under the insults, under the fighting and jeers and shared pain that they haven’t told Ryuu and Gin entirely about, there’s a bond that’s unbreakable. If that’s not love, Ryuu isn’t interested in the alternative.

And while it’s different, that care of Chuuya’s extends to Ryuu and Gin. Ryuu knows it from the way Chuuya looks for them after they go into No. 6 for smuggling business, the way he snaps at them to treat their wounds and tells them to be more careful next time. It’s tough love, but it’s what Ryuu and Gin need.

Dazai is different. He’d kill to protect Chuuya and Gin, and once, he killed to protect Ryuu. He hasn’t since, and Ryuu doesn’t think he would again. Ryuu is the one that sticks out, the one Dazai doesn’t approve of, the one Dazai thinks is too dangerous to keep. Ryuu knows all of this, but he doesn’t understand what he’s supposed to do about it.

He tries so hard to succeed, tries to be strong, to earn his right to live by beating all the things that would kill him. He tries to protect, just like Dazai does, protects Gin as he should have years ago, protect Chuuya and Dazai, though neither of them really needs anything he can give. They can deal with the day to day thugs that live in the West Block better than he can.

Dazai still won’t give him that approval. Or at least, he didn’t.

Atsushi is both the problem and the solution. As soon as he entered the mix, as soon as Ryuu retreated to a weaker support role, suddenly Dazai had nothing but praise to give him. Ryuu can’t remember a single time Dazai had told him good work before this year, but suddenly, because he watches Atsushi’s back a few times, he’s heard it twice.

Why?

Why?

It’s nothing special, what Ryuu does with the rats. Sure, it’s a skill he’s learned, but so could anyone else. That doesn’t make him strong, and it doesn’t make him worthy of staying in this world. He hasn’t fought anyone for the right.

So why does Dazai suddenly think he deserves the right?

How does letting others fight for him, sending them in directions as he finds threats, how does that work in a world where only the strong survive and the weak are slaughtered?

Is that what Atsushi meant when he said he would teach Ryuu something other than killing? What is he supposed to learn?

If protecting the others with his fighting skills isn’t what Dazai wants, if this support role is what garners him praise, should he pursue it more? To what end?

Ryuu doesn’t have answers to any of these questions, and they’re starting to make his head hurt. He doesn’t understand Atsushi, is having to admit that maybe he never understood Dazai, and for the first time, he’s trying to. And it’s confusing and painful and he’d honestly rather not.

So instead, Ryuu falls back on the one thing that is his and no one else’s. Gin, Dazai, and Chuuya don’t need him to protect them from thugs, but there is one enemy they’re all threatened by, and Ryuu has made a project of trying to take that enemy away.

No. 6 looms over them all, walls separating the West Block from its citizens. As long as that city stands, Ryuu and the people he cares about will always live with fear. So the city must fall.

Ryuu uses the rats to scout out weak points. It’s slow going. He tried for years on his own and got absolutely nowhere. Then he found allies.

A woman named Higuchi, who works in the Security Bureau. She noticed the rats for what they were almost two years ago, and rather than shutting Ryuu’s whole operation down, she turned double agent, passing him what information she can. She’s still fairly low level, but she’s gotten him farther than anyone.

A man named Tachihara, who seems like he’s down for just about anything if it hurts No. 6. Ryuu doesn’t know why, and he hasn’t asked, because it doesn’t matter. Tachihara has a good eye for detail, and Ryuu now has the plans for several government buildings in No. 6 under his belt.

And a new ally Ryuu hasn’t told Atsushi about yet. Fukuzawa Yukichi, head of the Lost Town’s detective agency, and perhaps the only ally Ryuu has that wants to see No. 6 fall as badly as he does.

Exchanging messages with the rats isn’t ideal. They mostly have to work with what they can write and have the rats carry, which isn’t much. The voice transmitter feature doesn’t work well at such a distance, only good for short phrases every so often.

Ryuu has been exchanging messages with Fukuzawa ever since that conversation with Dazai where he revealed that he knew Fukuzawa as well. Ryuu made the logical leap that if Fukuzawa lost two people to No. 6, he might be willing to help.

It was a good leap. Fukuzawa has both an analytical mind that neither Higuchi nor Tachihara have and an entire agency of detectives. If anyone can help Ryuu figure out all the secrets No. 6 is hiding, it’s Fukuzawa.

Just telling him that Atsushi is alive was enough of an olive branch for Fukuzawa to throw in wholeheartedly. And now that Ryuu finally has enough information to seek out the shape of the monster that threatens them, he can try to plan.

At least, in theory. Ryuu is good at details, but the big picture? He wasn’t kidding when he told Atsushi that’s not his area. He’s trying to make it his area, though. If planning and scheming is what made Dazai praise him, Ryuu will keep doing it. If not killing is what will do that, Ryuu will listen to Atsushi’s demand, angry as he is that the promise was forced out of him. Maybe it cheapens things, that Ryuu didn’t choose to walk this path. Ryuu doesn’t much care.

Atsushi is easy for Ryuu to hate, but the more Ryuu tries, the more he has to admit that Atsushi isn’t beyond his understanding at all. That Atsushi actually makes a lot of sense, when Ryuu just shifts the idea of what it is to earn the right to live.

Because Ryuu still thinks this is a world where people have to take the right to live with their own hands, but Atsushi thinks it can be earned, by being a sacrifice, a martyr, by being the reason other people survive. Ryuu should hate him for that. He does.

He doesn’t as much as he should.

Maybe that’s the most unsettling thing about Atsushi. In a very twisted way, Ryuu can look into Atsushi’s eyes and see the parts of himself he hates the most, and even though he still doesn’t care much for Atsushi, he doesn’t hate Atsushi as much as he should. Atsushi, who took Dazai away, who depends on other people to cover for his weaknesses, the bleeding heart that will someday get him killed when he can’t support it, should be the worst kind of person in Ryuu’s eyes, and Ryuu doesn’t hate him much anymore.

In a very strange way, they’re nearly friends. They can at the very least tolerate each other. They work well together, when Ryuu stays back and Atsushi steps forward. Maybe that’s enough to explain Ryuu’s softening feelings, the near-release of his hatred. Maybe Atsushi can be here and not threaten everything he’s worked to protect.

Maybe Atsushi isn’t useless in his goals.

That’s more than enough reason to try and understand his demand. That’s enough reason for Ryuu to work harder at his mission to bring down No. 6 with his allies, and maybe, just maybe, Atsushi can help make that mission work.