#tbf my imagination is well enough that i can really see the worlds in my head around me if i really wanted to or smth

[noxtivagus]

🥺 thinking about ffxiv again hehe

[hyperfixation-hideout]

The fact that there was no post credit scene is kinda sad, why not have a quick little look at the reno team or see how qrows doing. We’ve spent the entire volume in the neverafter but we barley touched on the entire thing going on with sending the majority of a cities population into another part of the world. Hell the characters don’t even mention it

I felt the same way when the finale aired, especially since Oscar is my special interest, but also because ending v9 without the reunion felt wrong to me and unsatisfying.

HOWEVER, after seeing the clip of the storyboarded post-credits scene, I'm kinda glad they're gonna have more time to tweak it, as the reactions felt lukewarm and ooc at times (Qrow and his nieces just casually smiling at each other for a sec??? He thought they were DEAD!!!) Tbf it did seem a lot changed since they made that storyboard, though, considering it had them arrive in Vacuo via Raven's portal, which was not present in v9, so maybe they knew they were coming? Idk

I get they wanted a contained vol for this arc, but I can't help but feel it would've fit more cohesively at a different point in the story. Then again, having it right after Atlas' fall does put them in a heightened emotional state that was key to the volume. (As you can see, I have mixed feelings despite enjoying most of the volume :P) As you mentioned, they could've done a lot more with having them reflect on Atlas' fall. They make comments here and there, but don't really delve into it much or come away with new conclusions/viewpoints, at least that I've gleaned. Weiss especially I wish had more dedicated time to sort through her feelings about Atlas. Her monologue early in the vol was a great and promising start! It just didn't go anywhere (or at least, not far enough for me). Plus I wish it'd been clearer that Jaune killing Penny had been communicated to Ruby, or that she got to bring it up, even if the writers didn't wanna have her be mad at him or anything.

The finale in general was underwhelming (and frankly disappointing) for me considering how great the volume had been, though I understand they intended the vol to be longer and likely had to cut a lot. I do maintain that ending it without the reunion left it feeling open-ended, like a continuation of the arc -- not so much a cliffhanger as the last couple volumes (which were well done, to be clear!), but not as much a conclusion as, say, volume 5's finale -- ending on the reunion would've been a lovely bit of closure for the Atlas chapter of their journey.

All I can hope now is we don't brush past what OLVE went through during the timeskip, and that we still get to explore the effects of v8 on those characters & the furthering of the character arcs prominent in v8. I worry with SO many characters in one place, we won't be able to focus enough time for that (and it'll be hard to do without feeling like the audience is simply "catching up"), but given how central and/or pivotal the character arcs of those in OLVE were in Atlas, I imagine we won't be dropping those threads.

[kurp-stuff]

Just posting some thoughts about the dead/po/ol and wol/ve/rine movie (i was gonna tag a post but it became too long and unrelated to the actual post which was about byebyebye nsync). It's not gonna be organized, maybe i'll organize them later whatever.

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i thought the movie was barely a movie rather a succession of cameos references and fight scenes. It felt really empty or shallow to me. (really makes you understand why in english film and movie are different terms tbh). And seeing people say it's a very good movie has me losing my mind fr

Not that i had a BAD time either. I got all the references since im a big stinky nerd. And i have a fascination for bad 00s superhero movies. They're delicious garbage to me. So I was amused by he cameos.

But GOD please im begin people to actually watch movies other than marvel ones

I say that as someone who started their cinematography classes almost only with those as a reference. And i was a bit snobbed by my cinemato professor so my point is not to be a snob. like yes sometimes it's fun I understand.

tho i wouldnt rewatch almost any mcu movie for pleasure. I still very much enjoy the guardians of the galaxy trilogy for example. But that's because they're literally better than the other mcu movie sorry i dont make the rules hihi. And x-men first class is one of my fav movie let's be real.

So yea sometimes it's fun but when it's monopolizing the industry and honestly harming it ....There should be less of those amusement park movies. Yessss ok im aligning with scorcese sorryyyy. Sorry im an old fart 😔.

And i know cinema started as a curiosity showcased in fairs and huh circus/carnivals etc. But that's also because it was new.

Anyway again not saying this as a snob like im better than you or whatever. I regurlarly watch disney channel original movies like they're the best things ive ever seen. So im not here for denying you your fun. Im here to tell you YOU DESERVE BETTER.

Now back on the movie itself : the music was nice. But can you go wrong with classic madonna and corny 00s boys band songs and grease ?

tbf i think the 1st deadpool movie is more crappy than funny and i liked the 2nd one. It had some funnies in it (and again big stinky nerd so i knew the new characters (mostly) and was happy to see them) But GOD is that humour 12 yo boy on 9gag in 2011. most of it at least. And fart jokes make me joke most of the time so you can imagine if im tired by the movie's humour. Like I love the Austin powers movie and im still saying that. (idk im trying to find examples of movies with crass humour tho it's not exactly the same kind of humour. And not all jokes make me laugh in Austin powers to be clear)

Weird villain choice for a movie which is at best anecdotic (do you say that in english ?). I used to read x-men comics with her in it cause my dad had them. But didnt understand shit cause i was literally 8. But she seemeed way to important and scary to be a deadpool movie variant villain ???? Feels like wasted potential.

Idk if it's skill issue from me but trying to sum up the movie to a friend was a hard task. And idk if it's because the movie is actually well very empty so when talking about it i immediatly talked about the cameos and references rather than the plot. Tho the overall plot is not that complicated, it's just not solid enough and nothing in the narration and filming helps (sorry lacking some cinematography terms in english)

The middle part is so long and mostly boring (except for the cameos) that i forgot what they were doing there at some point. Also very much my opinion, and i think the same for the 3 deadpool movies, but the humour really prevents me for caring about anything happening. Also love Wade saying he wants to save his timeline because his whole world is like 5 people that live in it. But we only see those people like 5 minutes, 10 minutes tops.

Also idk but i feel like this movie would be an ordeal to watch for someone who isnt temrinally ill with mcu disease and hasnt watched every single piece of mcu shit there is before watching this movie. (i mean I did ...watch almost everything...sooo uugh). Like this was another problem I had telling the story to my friend. She has watched A LOT of mcu and has been a big fan of it until like maybe 2 years ago when doctor strange mom came out (which was terrible you guys are insane for thinking this movie is good. twas a bit funny tho. but not comically bad enough for me to call it delicious garbage. I was a bit desappointed but i had expectations for billy and tommy lmao. I'll rewatch it one day). And she hasnt watched any mcu shows. NOW TO EXPLAIN THE TVA. Okay I simplified by saying they're a time patrol that "controls" and watch over all the timelines or something like that. But geeze. And if you havent watched all or some the old fow superhero movies, the cameos are meaningless to you (not my case I wish the human torch had stayed longer. I was obsessed with the fantastic 4 movie as a kid. delicious delicious garbage. My second obsession was the daredevil 2003 movie. I would have died if they'd manage to get Ben Affleck for this shit).

Like a youtuber I follow said, it's probably gonna become less enjoyable with each rewatch, like no way home (which i thought was very mediocre even when i 1st saw it with friends and was the only old killjoy saying it wasnt the masterpiece they said it was). Let's be real apart from the other spider-man participation, the movie is boring. And stupid. Mcu Steven Strange is a stupid old fuck and deserved to be demoted :) . And even the cameo moments have little pauses after made specially for cinema cheering. UUUGUHHGHGH. Like apart from that the movie is not solid enough for it to stay the same fun everytime we watch it. And the cinematography is like absent i believe. SOOOO YEAAA.

Oh yeah the joke about Hugh Jackman being forced to play wolverine until he's 90 and then the same week anouncing robert downey jr returning to the mcu as dr doom 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

Anyway

Superheroe movies can be good and CINEMA, not just entertainment (i do believe cinema should also be entertaining actually BUT you get me). That's why Im annoyed at those movies. Like Of course I do believe a vast majority of comic books adaptations should be animated movies or shows. Like literally the best superhero movies are the incredibles and into the spiderverse. Undebatable. Then there's like The batman 2022 which is the only live action superhero movie i thought was good good. Oh yea and 2 or 3 x-men movies are nice I love them Im an x-men stan when xmen is good. (huh yes im a nolan batman trilogy hater, i fucking hate them, find them boring as hell and dull and fail to see how they are cinematographically interesting. Also responsable for bad opinions about batman since 2005. Doesnt feel anything like batman, like honeslty could just change the characters' name that's how much they dont feel like themselves. Feels like Nolan doesnt like batman, is ashamed of doing a batman/superhero movie. Realism my ass. Artistic direction I HAAAATE. I'll try watching it again sometime cause im desperatly trying to understand what people like in these movies)

Anyway that's it for now after this digression. If anyone read all that and wanna talk about it Im open.

[six-improbable-things]

I finished bg3!!! I still have the newly added epilogue left to do, but I'm procrastinating playing that because I don't wanna say goodbye to my babies. It only took me just under 94 hours, which is the longest it's ever taken me to finish a game, but that's unsurprising given how fucking MASSIVE bg3 is content-wise. I know for a FACT there's still a LOT of sidequests I missed on my first playthrough.

My computer couldn't really handle the graphics in all the cutscenes in the post-Act 3 stuff, so there were a lot of graphical glitches during that, which was sad. (The dragon was invisible for 99% of the final fight, Withers is perpetually naked now, Orpheus's mind flayer body has no textures, and when Lae'zel summoned the dragons at the end, they were all missing heads so they just had floating eyeballs, plus a few NPCs with their tits out in the cutscenes. Not to mention that a ton of other textures didn't fully load and were just smooth. (but that last one has always been a problem. just not to this extent.)) Tbf, my laptop is at least 4 years old at this point. It's not exactly a graphics powerhouse. The funny thing is that there's hardly ever any lag. Just texture issues.

The last fight was really frustrating, because I made Orpheus turn into the mind flayer, and dude has essentially NO HIT POINTS. (150, compared to the rest of the party. Gale was the next lowest with 172, but he hardly got touched the first 3/4 of the final fight. Mt GTav had the Amulet from the House of Hope, and so they had more HP than Lae'zel.) I think he died literally 3 times??? And went down at least 2 other times. In the end, it took both my Bard Tav and Shadowheart using both their action and bonus action every round to heal him enough to keep him upright so he could actually subdue the fucking Netherbrain. Ofc, then once he opened the portal, it took less than 2 rounds to finish the brain off.

I love this game so much, and I can totally see why it won GOTY. It's captivating, and well-made. (Imagine how perfect it could have been without crunch-time! Fuck corporate crunch time.) I enjoyed just about every aspect of it, from beginning to end. It's definitely up there in my list of favorite games, although I haven't played all that many game. It might even beat D:OS2 in terms of enjoyment, although I do wish bg3 has D:OS2's level of polish. (but then again, D:OS2 has been out for a while, and is in its Definitive Edition, so I suppose it makes sense.)

I will say that having to either choose a party member or Orpheus to become Illithid was... interesting. I'm glad they give us Orpheus as an option, because given that a lot of the characters have spent the entire game desperately avoiding becoming Illithid, it would be so counter-productive to their stories to have them transform at the last minute. Though, I suppose that is the devs' point. That being a hero means making hard choices, and sometimes those choices mean that you don't get to live to see the world you saved. Or that the world you saved will hate you afterwards.

[vaguely-concerned]

Okay so, i kinda can imagine how and why graves fancies tf but what is it for tf that intrigues him about graves? "Why" did he fall in love

Hm. Well, I feel like one of the really big ones is that Graves is just... astoundingly honest and unapologetic in being exactly who and what he is. I think that's one area where his character is frequently misunderstood -- Graves isn't stupid (I'd even argue that he's frequently got a sort of shrewd clarity to the ways he thinks), he's simply incredibly straightforward and stubborn. He's not interested in expending energy on hiding or obfuscating himself which, for ol' Tobias 'Smoke and Mirrors & Find the Lady' Felix, must be almost like having a window into a fascinating yet perfectly alien world haha. I feel like meeting someone who’s so fundamentally on the same wavelength (lest we forget they did meet because they were trying to pull literally the exact same con just in opposite directions fadskhsajfa) yet so different from you in other ways would be incredibly intriguing.

For T.F., who's pretty explicitly on some level always running away from something, it must be something indeed to have a partner whose first instinct is instead to fight, to plant his feet and stand his ground against the world come hell or high water. (Which tbf he probably survived so long only because T.F. was around to be his common sense and/or watch his back lmao between them they make one reasonable-ish man.) It makes him this sort of… evidence on a nearly existential level that there is an alternative to fear and helplessness, especially if you’re not alone, handily encapsulated in one grouchy cigar-smoking Bilgewater boy.

I suppose what I’m trying to get at is that Graves has this very real, solid, grounding presence in his brash and heedless way, and I think T.F. is drawn to that as someone who floats along unmoored in the world a lot on his own. What can I say, he’s so reassuring to have around, it’s a great part of my enjoyment of him too haha. Also he's funny, whether intentionally so in a hilariously frank offhanded way or, quite often, unintentionally lol what more can you ask for from the love of your life than to provide endless entertainment either way.

AND I think it’s something about parts of Graves very few people – honestly, probably only T.F. in a few cases – get to really see. Look at the way Graves' rage deflates immediately in Burning Tides the moment he sees T.F.'s honest distress, or the sense of fondness for T.F. you get through his POV in the short stories. There is something warm and sweet and instinctively protective still there at the bottom somewhere that somehow survived a Bilgewater upbringing and everything that happened since (and perhaps survived precisely because he met T.F. when he was still quite young, so there's a little bit of, y'know. That mutual sense of realizing someone saved something fragile and small but invaluable inside you just by being there with you and not just not breaking it but protecting it without even realizing it.) The cheerful amorality he has in his hm. professional life doesn’t really translate into how he deals with interpersonal stuff. My sense is that there was always a spark of attraction there for T.F. right from the start – his bio calls them ’kindred spirits’ straight off the bat, which like :’) aww -- but what made him fall slowly and miserably deeper and deeper in love with no end in sight oh god oh help why are feelings and why do I have to have them are these things that become apparent only with time and as the trust between them grows – like the immense capacity for loyalty and… not devotion in the usual sentimental sense, but the way Graves is so unflinchingly ride or die once he’s actually found something worth it, and the one thing in his life he seems to feel like that about is their partnership. (No better evidence of this than the sheer immediacy with which he offers to work together again at the end of Burning Tides; he really got the truth of what happened back in the day like fifteen minutes ago and that was long enough for him to decide he’s willing to try for what they used to have again despite everything.) That way Graves has of immediately and instinctively thinking in terms of ’us’ and ’we’ that offers a camaraderie of equals so freely and… wholeheartedly?, the glimpses of vulnerability you get simply from how desperately he clearly wants connection with T.F. even if he’s not quite self-aware enough to name it or know what to do about it... things about him that could only shine through and grow in the context of a safe and stable long-term relationship (not necessarily a romantic one, though personally I of course always see at least romantic elements there) because where he grew up I can’t imagine there’d be many places it would be safe to show them.

And lastly I feel like some of it is about these innate qualities about Graves, and some of it is in the dynamic/energy they make between them. Have you ever had a friend where it doesn't really matter what you're doing, because while it's the two of you together everything, the whole world, seems funnier and bigger and more interesting? They've got that, that 'greater than the sum of our parts' joy not only in the other person, but in who you become with them and what you both become together. (Just look at them towards the end of 'Double Double Crossed'; these two idiots have more fun when they're together than all the rest of Runeterra put together. If you get that with only one person in your entire life I think that’s enough.)

Also, I mean, on a shallower note he's uh. he's hot hahaha. He's a big strong dude and from how TF has taken time out of his day to point out this obvious fact several times now across different forms of media I have to assume that that Does something for him.

[the-musical-cc]

What's wrong with the Twilight Princess manga? (Genuinely curious because I often hear it's good)

No, I mean, it's good! What I've read isn't really terrible (And take in account that because they aren't selling it here just yet, I've only read what I've been able to find online.) This is most likely about me putting something in the tags about how most fans ignore it, referring specifically to Link's backstory, but like...Bruh I'm biased, don't pay mind to my rambles XD

...

*rambles anyway.

I mean, it IS good. I like it enough that I want to buy the whole thing once it's completed, available in my country (In english because the spanish names are a fucking joke) and have enough money that I don't regret buying like 12 tomes that are like 120 pesos each. It brought some ideas that are gold, such as Luda and Shad coming with Link in the adventure for a short time, Midna helping Link beat the Gorons in sumo (Though it does sacrifice one of the most hilarious parts of lore of the game.) and the questionability of Hyrule's attitude towards anything that isn't 'Pure' or 'Bright'. I just disagree with a lot of the choices made in it.

Link's backstory. I had thought it to be a matter of personal taste at first, where I saw him as someone who maybe came from outside but grew in Ordon and was just getting stupidly offended over differing opinions, but as it turns out I just didn't remember why I'd had that idea for years now. Ilia mentions having been kids together with Link, and hilarious as the thought that she's referring to one year prior to events in the game is, it most likely means he's been there for years. Honestly? My impression is they wanted Link to not have too deep a tie to Ordon for whatever reason, and I Hate That. I'm certain I'm not the only one to say 'That's bullshit' and just go with something else there, which is why I say most of us ignore it anyway.

They highkey stole an arc from Hyrule Warrior Legends. Though tbf they also put a very blatant 'Empire Strikes back' moment in there and as much as it annoyed me... it was pretty cool. Still, this is the one game where Shadow Link had no business to be and they put it in there for an entire fucking arc.

Twilight Princess' cast is fucking HUGE why on Hylia's green earth are you putting OCs in there??? It's not even like they're filling a role no one else could have had! They've done it before in their previous Zelda works, and other manga adaptations have as well, but I like most of them because they had something to bring to the table (Even if it was romantic drama, in Ganthy's case.) here it's little to nothing they can contribute with that couldn't have been done by putting an already existing character there. It may be my theatre brain speaking but it bothers me when you have a huge cast and do NOTHING with it and instead bring out another character out of NOWHERE to get things done. Just use what's already there, damn you!

Zelda and Midna's backstory. Hear me out... I love it... but it doesn't work. I've spoken before about how much it annoyed me when the narrative had Zelda and Link respectively blame themselves for the invasion (Even though the guy invading is RIGHT THERE???!?!) for having 'Touched' the dark and made it so it could invade their world, and that's part of it. The other is: Having Zelda sacrifice for Midna not because it was the right thing to do, not because it's the one thing she can do for her people, for the Twili, for Link and Midna herself, and instead making it 'You're my childhood inter-dimensional pen pal, I just realized, welp, time to die.' kind of cheapens the impact it had on Midna in the game and what it says about Zelda as a character (We barely get anything on her in the game, but what we do get is powerful.) It's beautiful, but it misses the point completely.

Also Midna just randomly showing up in Link's dreams in her true form is stupid. YEAH, I SAID IT! I get it they're probably thinking 'Well, what's the point in building up anticipation? You know this is what she looks like already.' but one of the reasons the ship is so heart-wrenchingly good is Link knew her inside and out despite her warped shape. In the end, it didn't matter what she looked like so long as it was her. Link fell in love with her gremlin ass transformation AND THAT IS PERFECT OK??? Imagine like if on 'Beauty and the Beast' Belle just randomly kept meeting the prince in dreams, like they're waving a carrot in front of her to get things done with so she can smooch that freaky Habsburg mug. It's fucking awkward! (And it sort of cheapens their actual chemistry, it feels a lot like 'Oh, he has to see she's hot or it wouldn't be believable that he fell in love.' Get outta here with that.)

Shad.

OK, fine, I'll elaborate. Shad has a dialogue in-game about following up on his dad's life work, it is also implied that he's passed away. What does the manga do? Ignore all that and make it so Shad's dad is a 'Serious' investigator who disapproves of his son's interests. 'Shut up dad! It's not a phase dad! You go clean your room, dad!'. Why? No reason. It's not even interesting!

Shad is the friendliest fucking guy ever, rambling to Link about his hyperfixation on first meeting. Calls him 'Old sport' and stuff like that, seemingly befriends him immediately. What'd the manga decide to do with him? They're RIVALSSSS, and snarky to one another because Shad may or may not have a little crush on Ilia. UGH.

Look, you can't be a real Resistance if the members can't even look after themselves, so making Shad kind of a loser (Because he's a nerd. Hahah. Get it? Nerds are losers.) really took the piss out of the Resistance, tbh. Might have been the point, though, seeing how they needed to make space for their OCs in the final battle at Hyrule Castle... and, look, I've said this before but if you need to make a character look horribly bad for no other purpose than making another look more competent, you're not half as good a writer as you think you are. Link didn't need Shad to look pathetic to look more heoric, that's just sad.

Also take one look at that guy and tell me he doesn't drink his respecting women juice every damn morning and sometimes for dinner... well, in the manga, he's apparently kind of a leecher.

Srsly how is he friends with Ashei if he's kind of a leecher, she'd break his fingers.

There's probably more but I really don't want to come off like I'm trying to discourage people from reading it because I'm not! Like I said, it's a good manga! It has some pretty neat battle sequences, it makes Hyrule feel MASSIVE, it has some pretty horrifying moments that make the stakes feel more real, it takes things that are a certain way in the game for the sake of the mechanics and tries to make them more organic (In the specific case of Ilia's memory, it succeeds.) and Akira Himekawa never fails to make Zelda and every female character look gorgeous. It's just not great in terms of being an adaptation, but that's not necessarily a terrible thing, it just depends on taste. Still, specifically where Link's backstory concerns... I think most fans just ignore it because, really, it doesn't make sense.

[5uptic]

Hi! I moved here cause I can’t get a lick of sense from the people on bird app. Idk how to feel about this shitshow that I just witnessed. I just remembered there were more reasons as to why that person was banned. That person initially harassed a member of 5up’s community in which the mod defended. So the group disliked the mod too and continued to shit on them privately and publicly.

Next, thirst tweets can be funny to some. But others find it really uncomfortable which is understandable. They have made suggestive remarks about the pink man and even steve before (that peeps overlooked) but it’s not like the cc themselves are bothered (?). So idk even anymore.

I’m don’t know if I’m making any sense. I’m sorry for the spam ;( This is just the first time I just felt genuinely anxious seeing all the things said about 5up so I word vomited here.

oh my god. i had an entire response done and tumblr just GLITCHED in my face WHY

hey anon, don’t worry about it!!! tbf, i feel pretty much the same. i think the situation as a whole is pretty frustrating to see, especially with how it blew out of proportion in every way possible. honestly, feel free to vent in my inbox whenever you want!

with that said, though,

(because this will be kinda long, i guess)

overnight, it became clear that the nsfw part of the issue is not really an issue, besides being the recurrent meme for this situation. i read from various people that 5up explicitly said that he didn’t have a problem with the nsfw tweets when discussing this with the mods, but that he took that decision based on the harassment, which. ok another can of worms. to me, the thing is... smart fandom behavior is to always push away the things that you don’t wanna see. so nsfw jokes/tweets might be not of your liking. what should you do? the correct answer is, unfollow/mute/block the people that make them, and in general every person that you wouldn’t wanna share the fandom with. that’s to me the only way you can genuinely enjoy fandom as intended lol. but there are cases in which we do not take the smartest option. and we somehow make this our problem, which is the most typical case of twitter entitlement, that reads like “you’ve posted something i don’t like. Prepare To Die.”

when i saw the tweet pictured above in the thread, i was like ooooooooooh so this is just. typical twitter drama. which already highlights the entire issue with this... this is just twitter drama. why is twitch involved? how did the person get banned in both of 5up’s channels? if it were for twitter drama, or this person tweeted something i don’t like!, i’m sure hundreds of people would be arbitrarily banned. so that’s why it’s handled differently on twitch. now, i don’t know jasfer, like i’ve never talked to the guy, but i’m familiar with him. as someone who’s been a fan of 5up for like a year now, i know he’s been here from the start and he’s also a beloved chat member and person in the twitter portion of the fandom. it feels like insult to injury because it wasn’t that jasfer had a bad reputation in 5up’s chat or a bad relationship with most people in it. it’s just... such shitty luck on their part tbh lol

imagine if it were anybody else, like, two randoms on twitter. the best outcome to that would probably be an eventual block on both sides so they just stop talking about it all the time, right? except that this didn’t happen here because one of them happened to be a mod for a chat that the other person frequented. i think by now you know i don’t agree with the decision at all, then.

thing is, i can understand everyone’s sides and empathize with everyone. i understand why 5up stood up by his mods, i understand why the mod was anxious/felt targeted and resorted to this option, i understand jasfer’s anger/sadness from the outcome of the situation. but i’d still side with jasfer, nonetheless, because he’s the only one with no power here. the most that he can do is bring attention to what happened, but he can’t unban himself, or return in other account and expect everything to go well, etc. and it’s like, urgh. like if i was on their place i would be genuinely devastated lol.

now, i could be talking completely out of my ass, right? because i don’t know what really happened. maybe jasfer genuinely did incredibly shitty things and corralled the mod team and 5up into taking that drastic decision. but that’s just another part of the whole twitter drama of it all, isn’t it? see, when i was more active in twitter (in another fandom), if you didn’t like someone/something you’d talk shit about them in your rant. that’s how it went, and everybody did the same. in that part, i can understand how things grew out of proportion, but again, does anyone know what really happened besides the mods and jasfer? not really. and it’s hard to take a real stance because the whole thing happened on private twitter accounts. which yet again highlights how bad of a decision banning jasfer from both 5up twitch channels was, because, how are we ever gonna know if it was deserved? jasfer didn’t do anything wrong in chat, which is what should matter. and if the so called harassment (that we have to take 5up’s word for it!) happened in private rant accounts... is. is it really harassment? or like, was it just a case of people being (understandably) reactionary and doing what everyone else usually does in twitter dot com?

and the fact that the mod liked this tweet afterwards... isn’t that just incredibly petty? celebrating a personal victory after banning someone that has no say in the matter? jasfer said they tried contacting 5up through discord, and only made the thread days later because they never got a response. so it’s clear that 5up (understandably!) took their mods’ side and was loyal to them, but it came at the cost of what could’ve been a smarter, better decision for everyone involved. but now, because jasfer was left with no tools other than bring attention to his side of the story, twitter blew it out of proportion and everyone is very kindly sending dead threats to everybody involved.

sigh. it’s just... a big mix of terrible luck and bad choices. i usually agree with 5up when it comes to twitter stuff, but making it seem like he’s going against everyone is ignoring the fact that some twitter drama should’ve never made it to his twitch channel(s) anyways, and that a better decision should’ve been taken. now it’s just the worst of both worlds and no one got anything good out of it. like, arguably, the mod got what they wanted, but also got multiple death threats too. i doubt there’s any chance of jasfer ever coming back to 5up’s chat, at least not in the way it was before. because of the twitter thread including sapnap and this being a bad decision in general, a bigger audience now regards 5up badly and this will probably be a passing mention in the eventual cancelling 5up thread when twitter gets boring enough. like, meh. it’s just a mess to watch and it’s just depressing from every angle.

[calliecat93]

When I started TNG, the biggest curiosity I had was why Dr. Pulaski was so hated. I heard plenty about why, but at the same time I wanted to see for myself and be able to draw my own conclusions. Well now that I’ve finished S2, I think that I can safely state my opinion and the reasons why she had such a bad reception.

My general opinion is… Pulaski’s fine, but she got an bad start. She’s a very competent doctor who is devoted to her duty. She’s a bit of a smartass, but otherwise a friendly enough person. She’s a VERY much based off a certain CMO form a certain other Star Trek show that came out before this one, but we’ll get to that later. Pulaski honestly had a lot working against her and she just wasn’t able to get over them despite her actress Diana Muldaur (who played Miranda Jones in TOS) doing an excelent acting job. It ultimately ended with Pulaski being dropped all together and Crusher returning in Season 3.

While I understand the hate against Pulaski and can’t say that it’s unwarranted to an extent, I think that a lot of it that I saw was overblown. Now if people disliked the character, that’s fine. Everyone has different tastes and reasons for what they like and dislike and should be free to have and express those thoughts. But a lot of the issues with her that I had were taken care of very early on and she became much better by the end of her tenure. So why do I believe that Pulaski ultimately failed? Well I’ve come up with three explanations based off my own observations from watching the show and what I got from fandom consensus. Now this is all my opinion based on those observations and is not objective fact whatsoever, so take this with a grain of salt. So I believe the reasons that Pulaski failed are:

#1. She Is Essentially a Female Dr. McCoy… Sort Of: Pulaski was clearly heavily based on Dr. McCoy from TOS. She’s an middle-aged, somewhat world-weary doctor. She’s stubborn, grumpy, and doesn’t put up with anyone’s crap. She’s witty and always ready with a biting comment. She has the dedication to her job. She has the bantery relationship with the Science Officer, which we’ll go into that here soon. She is a doctor before she is an officer and that will always be her top priority, even at great risk to herself. She has a zero tolerance towards authority and isn’t afraid to talk back to anyone no matter how much they outrank her. She even outright has a hatred of teleporters that McCoy had. The parallels are all there. It may be why I’m a bit more lenient on her since McCoy is very much my favorite character in TOS and so far all of ST. But I think it is very much the root of the problem.

While Pulaski has several of McCoy’s traits, I think the writers really only understood McCoy on a surface level. They forget to include his compassion, his empathy, his humanism, his loyalty to the captain even when he opposes his actions, all of the things that make McCoy… well, McCoy. I don’t even know if the pacifism is there. Also McCoy had over 70 episodes of TOS and at that point five films (Undiscovered Country hadn’t been made yet). Pulaski had about 20 episodes and her relevance depended on the episode. McCoy had that as well, but he also had more material so we had FAR more time to get to know him. Pulaski didn’t get to have the time to gain that depth or care from the audience. Like… can I imagine Pulaski hypoing someone so that she can be tortured in their stead and it have the same impact that The Empath did? Can I see her counseling and assuring Picard if he’s having doubts like McCoy did for Kirk in The Ultimate Computer (okay tbf that would be Troi’s job but still)? Could I imagine any of the main cast being crushed about Pulaski dying of a terminal illness and choosing to stay on essentially a doomed spaceship with someone she just met and feel as gutted as I did in For the World is Hollow…? Honestly… given time maybe but in the end no. Now could I imagine McCoy risking getting an aging illness to possibly cure a child and others of it ala Unnatural Selection? Yes, albiet I think he’d be smart enough to bring protective equipment with him to be safe. Could I imagine McCoy telling someone like Data they’d be wrong to sit by a woman giving birth because he wasn’t human ala The Child? Hell no. Maybe he would if he was worried it would cause potential distress the one giving birth, but it sure as hell wouldn’t be because they’re an android. But I could imagine that someone who just saw McCoy as ‘grumpy doctor with a bad bedside manner who says witty lines and argues with the logical Vulcan character’ would get that interpretation. Thus why I think that Pulaski may have ended up how she did.

Now mind you I do think it IS a double standard to excuse McCoy’s dickish momemts and flaws, but demonize Pulaski for her’s. It’s like saying a man can be that way because it’s just expected of them and they can be forgiven, but a woman doing so or being assertice is wrong and they are horrible and unforgivable for having these traits or having flaws even if they correct them. That being said I do think that it’s more than that and it all comes down to the fact that TOS and TNG are two different shows with different character dynamics and ways of doing things. TOS mainly followed a Triumvirate (for the most part but that’s a different post entirely), TNG is much more of an ensemble. Pulaski didn’t have a Kirk nor a Spock to bounce off of or either let her traits shine or be kept in check like McCoy did nor did she really develop any unique relations for herself aside from maybe with Troi. We hear about her empathy and humanitarianism, but we don’t really see it on-screen like we did with McCoy. She has his surface level traits, not the deeper ones that the Triumvirate dynamic along his doctor position allowed him to showcase. In other words, Pulaski was put in a series that wasn’t designed for her while McCoy was exactly where he needed to be in order to thrive. It really speaks to how much the TNG writers didn’t really seem to get McCoy or why and how his character worked, which is strange since they got him right when he showed up in the series premiere. But maybe that was due to DeForest Kelley and him absolutely knowing the character he’d played for so long. But yeah they tried to replicate McCoy, and it just didn’t work with TNG’s already established character dynamics nor did they fully get the character that they were trying to recreate. If I want McCoy, I’ll go watch TOS or AOS. I didn’t need Pulaski for that.

#2. Data and Misconstrued Character Dynamics; This is in relation to the first reason and REALLY shows how much the writers didn’t think the dynamics through. We all know how much Spock and McCoy bantered. How they are opposite ends of the spectrum and how their perspective points helped Kirk in making his decisions. Well clealry they wanted to re-create that with Pulaski and Data. Makes sense, Pulaski represents the humanism and Data the logical. But there’s one big, BIG problem with that: Data is NOT Spock. A lot fo people have pointed this out, but here’s the thing about Spock. Despite whatever he may have said, Spock DID have emotions. He kept them suppressed due to the issues in his upbringing and that wasn’t necessarily healthy, but he did have them. And despite speaking in a calm manner, he was also an utter sass bucket, could be rude, and had no issue putting down humanity if he had a point to make. He and McCoy were very much equal in their bantering and yes maybe McCoy could go too far with his insults, but there was always an equal balance and Spock was also perfectly capable of starting/escalating their spats. There were also plenty of moments to show that in spite of it, they were still friends and cared a great deal about each other with probably the best examples of this being The Immunity Syndrome, Bread and Circuses, The Empath, and plenty of moments in others like Miri and For the World is Hollow… Those who have been following me know how much I love the Spock/McCoy dynamic and I could go all day, but the point is it’s a complex relationship that may seem like disdain on the outside, but is so much more when you examine it up close.

Data however? Data is intelligent and the Science Officer with a calm demeanor, but that’s about where the similarity between him and Spock ends. Data is an android. I do not believe that he is emotionless, he just has a different wiring that causes him to feel things differently. He’s never shown disdain towards humanity at least from what I’ve observed thus far. If anything, he actively seeks to understand it and emotions more. He actively has hobbies like Sherlock Holmes. He tries things like sneezing and growing a beard in an effort to understand more. Data is more or less a child with a child-like understanding of things and he doesn’t really understand social cues or things like humor, but he DOES have emotions and feelings. There’s too much on-screen evidence to say otherwise. He just has his own way of processing it. This is what makes Pulaski look so bad. When she calls Data a machine, says he can’t understand, and even purposefully mispronounces his name, she comes across as an outright bully. She is essentially bullying a neurodivergent child. Do I need to explain why that’s awful? Data, while by no means a doormat, isn’t the type to sass back or make any biting comments back like Spock would. There is no balance. There is no equal footing. There are not enough positive interactions outside the banter to show that there is something deeper there at the end of the day like Spock and McCoy did. Heck you can even compare how Pulaski and McCoy talk to Data via McCoy’s guest appearance in Encounter at Farpoint. He DOES make a quip about Vulcans when talking to Data and when Data points out he’s an android not a Vulcan, McCoy mumbles “Just as bad.” But immediately after he gives Data genuine heartfelt advice on treating the Enterprise with care. It’s clear that ultimately it’s McCoy being his usual grumpy self who’d be acting the same way towards anyone else and is otherwise perfectly civil and encouraging to Data. We’ve known him long enough to know this. Pulaski didn’t have that luxury, coming off as condescending towards Data at best and considering that she’s a doctor, it looks especially bad.

Now to be fair this only lasts for about four episodes. Pulaski does start catching herself by her second episode, and stops completely after Unnatural Selection when Data helps her and stays with her after she gets the aging virus. After that she’s MUCH moe civil to him, even defending his choice going against the Prime Directive in Pen Pals and was at his retirement party in The Measure of a Man. But clearly the damage had been done. Data is a very beloved character and by Oulaski’s intro had already been established and well-liked character. Data was treated equally and was valued as far more than just an android among the rest of the crew, Crusher included, so Pulaski coming in a season later and acting that way also didn’t help. The writers did not think through why Spock and McCoy worked and how to try figure out a unique dynamic for Pulaski and Data. Instead they just tried to copy TOS, and it utterly failed. It ruined Pulaski’s chances before she could even really start running. But I do believe that she could have rebounded and as I said, she DID get past it. She did relapse some at the end of the season in Peak Performance to the point I wanna say that maybe it chronologically happened earlier in the season, but even then she felt realized her screw up and apologized. It’s still an improvement from early on. But things just weren’t meant to be, which leads is to…

#3. She Only Lasted One Season/She Replaced Dr. Crusher: I believe that the biggest thing that worked against Pulaski is simple: she was cut after Season 2. Pulaski was created when Gates MacFadden left the show. I’ve seen conflicting reasons as to why, but regardless she left and a CMO was needed. IDK how popular Crusher was, but I had really enjoyed her. She was essentially the mom of the ship which added something different from TOS (wel McCoy was also the mom lets be real XD), had a son onboard which also added something new, was very much capable and devoted to her job, and was a badass when she got to use a phaser. Her being written out sucked, but that’s not necessarily a reason to hate Pulaski. But as I highlighted above, she just didn’t work. They tried to make McCoy, but without the dynamics and depth that let McCoy flourish. TNG is not TOS. Whenever TNG tried replicating TOS like with The Naked Now? It blew up in their faces. The key to a spinoff or reboot is to keep certain themes and tone alive, but to not just replicate what came before. TNG flourished when it began to find it’s own footing, and ultimately lasted four seasons longer than it’s predecessor due to it.

I genuinely believe that Pulaski COULD have developed into her own character and could have found her place the same way that McCoy did. But alas that didn’t happen. People wanted Crusher back, so they managed to get MacFadden to return and thus Crusher was put back in her rightful place. Because of it, Pulaski was just forgotten about. She didn’t get the chance to form her own character. She didn’t the chance to develop further and leave her early days behind. Why? Because she simply wasn’t given the opprotunity to do so. I can’t say it was the wrong choice, but it’s an utter shame because I do believe that Pulaski was on her way to improving. But it was too late. Her bad start with Data, her character not working in the TNG dynamic, and her replacing an already perfectly likeable character who did fit the dynamics all amounted to the character’s abrupt end. And because she didn’t get the chance to develop further and find her own path, her bad reputation has stuck to this very day.

In the end, the whole thing just feels like a waste. Pulaski had potential, but it just didn’t work in the end. I can’t say that I hate her. If anything, I feel bad for her. The writers failed her at the end of the day and by the time they tried correcting their errors, the audience had already made their judgement. It may have been for the best to just drop her and bring Crusher back, but I also hate seeing character potential just so utterly wasted. I hope that if any side material used Pulaski, they were able to find a much better direction for her. I can’t say that I love Pulaski. In a more TOS-like setting maybe she’d have worked better. But in the end I think that Pulaski was a decent character who just had too much working against her and they caused her to crash and burn. Just an unfortunate case all in all.

(Image Source)

[trashcatsnark]

I recently found you through all of your silverv posts (which are amazing by the way!) and I was wondering, how does Aidan handle not being able to hear Johnny in her head after they seperate and get him his own body (because yes it's canon, we don't accept any other endings here). I imagine it would be hard for her as she got used to not having to use her hearing aids to hear him.

Ahhhhhh!!!!! Thank you so much for enjoying my posts and also thank you so much for asking about my V, I often worry a lot I bring Aidan up too much in response to things because I have absolute brainrot for my oc babies. So, thank you so much for giving me excuse. 

But in regards to that; Aidan hates it and she hates that she hates it. For so much of her life, silence was her comfort. Despite all losing her hearing put her through when it comes to her Nomad “family”, it gifted her this way to shut the world out when it becomes too much. It gave her a wall she could always put up when she was tired of the world and the people in it. She didn’t have hearing aids for years following the loss of her hearing and the first time she was given them and put them in; she cried and ripped them out, because the world was too fucking loud. Even as she’s gotten use to them, she maintains them on low volume. The world has always had a mute button and volume control, which she likes. Her deafness isolated and othered her among her clan, but she learned to use it to grant herself peace as well. She prefers more often than not to be without them, nothing better after a long day of bullshit, to put the world on mute and to be left to her own silent little world. 

Then Johnny comes in and he gets through that, barges his way into her peace and destroys the silence of her little world. The one person she can’t mute and he’s also someone who never shuts up. And in the early stages, even past his initial...first impression, he is at times entirely too much. And it feels as if something has been taken from her (and tbf a lot has been taken from her) her peace, her tranquility, her little quiet world where she could just breathe and be is gone because this stupid yelling old man had to set up shop in her brain. 

But time goes on, communication gets better, relationship gets better, Johnny starts to grow, she starts to grow and he’s no longer an intruder in her little world but apart of it. It’s now their little word where only they exist, they only hear one another, only communicate with one another, just them, a world no one else can really intrude on. And that becomes her new sense of peace and comfort, Johnny does (Though she’d never word it that way, cause it sounds needy and dependent and lovey dovey, but he’s become her comfort and peace) 

And then everything changes, as it so often does, and woohoo everything’s fixed, but now Johnny’s voice is something she can’t hear no matter what anymore.�� And she hates it so much, because now she’s forced to hear everything else always if she also wants to hear Johnny and she always wants to hear Johnny. Now that she wants to hear him, no matter what, she can’t. It hardly seems fair. And she hates how needy and desperate and clingy it sounds, but god the world doesn’t feel right when she can’t hear him. The first time he talks to her afterwards and she has hearing aids out, she realizes she can’t hear him, she nearly wants to cry. She always wore her “weakness” like armor, used it to protect herself after others used it to hurt her, used the barrier it provided to stay safe; but she doesn’t want that between her and Johnny, she doesn’t need it with Johnny. 

For a long long while, she’ll be wearing her hearing aids more than she ever did before. Because she doesn’t wanna miss out on hearing him, doesn’t want to ever be without his voice. Once upon a time she yoinked them out as soon as she got home, but now she’s falling asleep with them in, because she wants to listen to him as she drifts off. But, hearing aids aren’t comfortable to wear 24/7, they can itch and irritate after so long and rub the skin raw. And she’ll try to pretend like that isn’t happening, because she knows she’ll be nagged about taking them out for a while. But, Johnny lived in her head, he knows what’s happening, catches her rubbing and itching at her ears more, starts to see them getting redder. And he’s telling her gently, you need to take them out and she’ll pout even though she knows he’s right. So, she starts to limit her time using them as much as she hates being without his voice...being without any part of him really. 

If she’s truly frustrated and desperate and upset, she may even entertain the idea of getting cochlear implants, something she was always sternly against. And Johnny does his best not to get mad when he learns that because he knows it’ll be her choice at the end of the day, but if she only is thinking of it because of him, that’s not right and a huge thing to do because spoiler alert, you’ll be taking away your volume control and mute button. And Johnny knows what happens when she gets overwhelmed and overstimulated by noise, he doesn’t want her putting herself through that daily just to hear him. 

And like with anything it takes time to adjust and grow used to it. Growing pains of both her and Johnny completing forgetting she can’t hear him without them. So, he’ll talk about something extensively or call her name or start to kind of sing a new tune that just popped in his head and be like “why is she ignoring me? did I do something wrong? did i forget something? did I fuck up?” and then see her hearing aids on the bed side table and be like “oh thank fuck, i thought I was in trouble.” Or because she sometimes even spoke out loud to him as an engram, she’ll start a conversation or ask him something, not hear the answer and be like “oh...right...” 

And eventually can accept, well maybe without her hearing aids she can’t hear him but she can hold him, feel him, lay her head on his chest and feel the rise and fall of his breaths, if he hums while she’s like that she can feel the reverberation and vibration of it in her chest, when she lays on him she can feel it when he talks even if she can’t hear it (sometimes she wonders if he just makes up nonsense to say or what he may say in those moments since he knows she wont hear, he never explains and she’s still deciding if she wants to hide a recorder somewhere in the apartment to find out later) She slowly becomes comforted and okay with the fact that while she doesn’t have him the way she did before, she does have him and that alone is more than enough. 

I also like the idea that there’s bleed over between Johnny and V following separation, things that stuck from the other person. Because, you can’t fuse, be separated and it be a clean perfect divide. You can’t blend red and blue then be surprised when you get purple. They leave traces of one another behind. And with my V, I like the idea that Johnny ends up with some sign language knowledge. Not fluent afterwards but she’ll catch him absent mindedly throwing an asl sign in with his usual hand gestures, which he didn’t even know he knew. And from there, he takes to actually learning it fully because while lip reading tech is way better in 2077, its still not always perfect and he knows her well enough to know how much she just appreciates people making that effort for her. He’s never quite perfect at it, because he has a habit of talking with his hands already and using a lot of hand gestures, so sometimes he’s trying to sign but instinctively does his own little hand motion. Hand talking is a habit he can’t really break and, quite frankly, Aidan doesn’t expect nor want him too. She still understands it fine, because after being brain roomates she understands him in most situations,  and affectionately calls it Johnny Sign Language. 

Eventually, its just normal life and she’s not even afraid to use it to joke around and be a shit head, or avoid his nagging at times, because how could she not. 

Johnny: So-

Aidan: Wait, is this about Arasaka, again?

Johnny: Yeah, but-

Aidan: *pulls out hearing aids while maintaining direct eye contact*

Though even so far into it, there will be real bad days, just days where her brain is not kind to her, where she’s struggling with the weight of all she’s endured, when she just needs all of him; needs to hear and feel him, needs to feel like he’s all hers again, like they’re in their own world and nothing else matters, a bubble where only he exists to her, so she’ll insist on wearing her hearing aids to bed, laying on his chest, volume on low so she can only really hear him, and having him talk to her about anything and everything, and once she’s fallen asleep he has to gently take them out and lay them on the bed side table for her. 

Also also, I didn’t get as into it, because this is already long as fucccck because i could talk about my ocs for actual years, but I also think Johnny struggles with feeling less special when suddenly she needs hearing aids to hear him. Because he kind of being the possessive man he is liked that there were times when he was all she could hear and that meant all the focus was on him. And now he’s just another person she can shut out if she chooses to do so. 

oKAY SHUTTING UP NOW AND THANKS SO MUCH FOR LETTING ME SCREAM FOR THREE YEARS

[facelessxchurch]

I'm still in awe that Nefarian won that battle tournament thing they played on the SP reddit. Imagine a group of people lackadaisical enough to read this garbage coming to the right conclusion out of nowhere

UGH yeah! That was so frustrating! I mean, I’m happy that Nef got some positive attention for a change, but the write-up of the battles were so unimaginative!

It always was: he wins bc red hand OP. If you’re clever enough you can beat him despite his red hand. It’s powerful, but it still has restrictions in place. Like there can be no barrier between the hand and his victim. Dive behind a wall and the pain cuts off. The red beams seem to be insta-kills, but you can dodge them and stuff like that.

What makes him far more dangerous is how intelligent, unpredictable and versatile he is! I don’t remember that well anymore, but there is an excellent chance I probably compiled this list of Nef’s canon magic bc this pissed me off so much.

For the White Clever VS Nef fight I wrote out all the things he could do to win even if his red hand doesn’t work. What do they do? “haha red hand goes brrr”

Like, why do this tournament/write-up in the first place if you’re going to be lazy about it?

Also, this is probably where this BS opinion comes from, that Nef has to be nerfed bc his hand makes him to OP. Bc they completely overestimate how powerful it is and underestimate pretty much everything else that makes Nef dangerous. Also, looking at all the OP characters SP has, what makes them think Nef is the one that has to be nerfed when fucks like Skulduggery, Valkyrie/Darquesse and Abyssinia are walking around??

Such a fucking mood!

I think it bothers you bc absolutely everyone always drew Mev dark haired (even before I started drawing him, since I used the others art as reference along with the ‘fake-canon’ pic that used to be posted on the wiki (it was a saturated version of this pic btw) that shows up a lot when you google ‘Mevolent’).

That’s not  chivalrous, that’s just really fucking weird tbh. I hate how Landy writes phase 2 Mevolent and I especially hated the entire part in Tahil Na Kurge with Val going full on Mary-Sue. 

Mev did have a few good scenes like how he easily he was fighting the assassins even without his magic and how it confirmed my headcanon about him being an agile fighter instead of a tank, since him wearing leather armour instead of metal had already been implying that. But with Mev it always feels a lot like Landy doesn’t know what route to take with him, leading to a very weird and inconsistent characterization. Honestly? I like how the people in the fandom write Mev a lot more (this excludes those that write him as a r*pist btw).

Be better than Mev and destroy the brain/go sure your overpowered opponent is truly dead. 

Tbf Darquesse had maincharacter plot armour protecting her, otherwise Mev would have accidentally solved the Prime Dimensions main issue for them.

Tbf Mev was probably lying through his teeth about wanting peace, just like I’m pretty sure that Mev was lying in KotW when he said he wanted a Truce with the Resistance. One of the few good things to come out of SoW was that it showed what a tricky and cunning bastard Mev is.

He probably prefers to take those in his way out in ways that cannot be traced back to him and replace them with his own people. Or he just wanted the peace so he can more easily get what he needs to bring his Gods back and let them do the killing instead of having his men die. In book 1 Nef mentioned they want to return their Gods so they can ‘cleanse’ the world and rebuild it in their image or something like that.

(I answer on my Mev blog even slower than I answer here, so if you want a quick answer I wouldn’t recommend it.)

LMAO fat chance. I mean, I’d love to see it, but we both know it’s not gonna happen. We’ll be lucky if Nef doesn’t get ruined further and that’s the best we can hope for tbh.

You most likely will, yes.

WHY DOES THIS FANDOM KEEP CIRCLING BACK TO THE MEV DICK DISCOURSE

I can’t believe it took Landy 14 years to come up with a reason why Nef and Skul hate each other and the reason pretty much just boils down to “they just don’t like each other and it got out of hand bc war”.

I’m extra pissed bc that was the exact question I asked him when I stood before him during the 2016 YALC for which my sorry ass flew to England and he couldn’t give me an answer back then. Instead he then told me that he was planning on releasing a secret on his blog each year on the release date of the last SP book and that that would be one of them. Well, that was a fucking lie.

[mvrtaiswriting]

heehee- kinda gay rn,,, can u,,, make a male!reader x Jonathan based off the song Beautiful by Thornly or Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol? Oh and if it could be in a modern universe that'd be nice aaa

Orange juice. - Jonathan Joestar.

Here I am, sorry for the laaate reply. Thank you for requesting something, I absolutely love my boy Jonathan and this was so cute to write!! Expect a lot of fluff, hope this meets your expectations. Enjoy!! x

Male reader (it’s more neutral tbf) x Jonathan Joestar

Jojo’s bizzare adventures: Phantom Blood

AU / modern universe

SFW // minor hints to violence & injuries

words count: 2069

recommended song: chasing cars - snow patrol.

Hi! Are you a new reader? Check my masterlist for more content! 

Please feel free to reblog or leave a comment :) help me support my art (it’s free!), 

© bearing in mind everything I post/write is my intellectual property so please don’t steal/copy and paste and post it as yours.

Being Jonathan Joestar’s neighbour was fun. Since the day you first met, the two of you became inseparable and it was hard to imagine a world where he wasn’t by your side. It was a peaceful afternoon when you first met him. He was taking his dog out for a walk, marching proudly on the sidewalk of the street you both lived in, holding the leash tightly to prevent his dog from running away. Jonathan wasn’t older than 6 at that time but he surely was a responsible little man, putting a lot of effort in completing his task.

Unluckily for him, however, a cat dared to cut his dog’s way. In matter of second, the poor boy completely lost control over his dog and its leash. The dog started to bark loudly before starting to chase the cat recklessly, causing Jonathan to trip over and skin his knees. You were playing outside, in the front garden of your house and you saw the entire scene. You quickly grabbed your orange juice and ran towards the injured little boy, whose cheeks were flushing red.

“Are you okay?” you asked in your little squeaking voice, kneeling beside him and patting your little hand on his shoulder. Jonathan simply nodded, too busy trying his best not to cry.

You sat next to him on the cold sidewalk floor and offered him your little orange juice.

“Mommy always gives one to me if I get hurt. It helps!” you encouraged him, who whispered a soft thank you before accepting your kind offer and takin a long sip out of the juice carton.

That was the first time you and the blue haired guy met, and you never left his side since that episode.

Years passed and the bond between the two of you grew incredibly strong. The Joestar’s family welcomed you warmly since the very beginning, making you always feel at home. You and Jonathan spent a lot of time around each other; during the younger days, you either went at Jonathan’s or at your place to have some play dates. Growing up, your play dates slowly turned into study sessions and lazy afternoons spent on the couch, catching up one of the many tv series you started watching together. Over the years, Jonathan undeniably became the most relevant figure in your life. He was the first friend you ever had, and you experienced some of life’s most important first times together.

He taught you how to ride a bike. You helped him remove the first milk tooth he lost.

Little episodes like these were what really made your relationship so particular, the affection between the two of you was stronger than any other feeling you ever experienced. You never really investigated the way you felt towards each other, always justifying the reciprocal need of spending time together with the simple excuse of it being a habit. A part of you however, knew exactly the reason why you felt as if your skin starved every time it missed his touch; it was the same reason why you felt a strange sensation in your stomach every time he’d hold you in his arms while watching a movie or simply looked you in your eyes.

Admitting your feelings towards him wasn’t something you’d ever consider. You feared your confession would have ruined years of friendship – and the bond you two shared was far too unique for you to lose it.

That night, Jonathan had one of his usual boxing matches. You never quite understood how Jonathan, the kindest person of all time, could practice such a violent sport. Outside the ring, Jonathan had a very docile behaviour; he was always so kind and a very easy going person. His beautiful smile surely was his signature, it was almost impossible to catch him in a bad mood. Inside the ring however, Jonathan seemed to become a different person. The concentration that the fight required always gave him a stoic expression, which was very unusual for him. His typical gentleness seemed to completely fade away when facing his opponents – but that was part of the game; sports such as boxing didn’t have any space for weaknesses or sentimentalities.

It wasn’t usual for you to assist his matches. You hated the vision of the man you loved getting beaten up with the sole intention of entertainment; seeing him all covered in blood was something you always tried to avoid.

“I know you’re rooting for me” he said to you earlier that afternoon. “But it would be nice to have you there, you know?” he continued, while delicately tracing random patterns on your back with his fingertips. It was impossible for you not to break under his touch, and you ended up agreeing on going to the match. An excited smile formed on Jonathan’s face, who quickly pulled you closer into his arms, wrapping you in his strong, sweet embrace.

“I should say yes more often.” you chuckled, resting your head on his chest and enjoying the feeling of his strong arms around your body.

Once you reached the gym where Jonathan’s match took place, you sat closely enough to the ring. You felt your heart pounding in your chest, unable to not worry about your best friend.

When his tall figure entered the boxe ring, his eyes started scanning every face in the crowd hoping to recognise yours – and when he did, he couldn’t help but smile shyly. He quickly looked back at the arbiter of the match, trying his best to hide his blushing and starting to focus on the match.

The first rounds were okay. Jonathan seemed more than able to handle the fight – it was highly likely for him to win; but he was tired. As time passed, his movements became slower. His shoulders visibly moved up and down as he breathed, emphasising how fatigued his body was. He staggered but tried his best to retrieve some energy, and never gave up until the last minute. The match ended when a strong, well placed punch hit Jonathan’s face, making him trip down and almost breaking his nose. Jonathan’s face quickly became covered in blood and once the arbiter announced the victory of the opponent, you quickly rushed to the ring, reaching Jonathan’s body.

“Are you okay? Let me see!” you said, leaning over him who tiredly laid on the ground, still unable to catch his breath. He simply nodded in response, looking at you with only one eye open while a soft smile adorned his lips. You shook your head hinting a weak laugh, while you helped him to get up. His almost powerless body relayed on yours as you walked to the infirmary, his arched figure still a bit taller than you. After receiving the medical treatments he needed, the two of you made your way out of the gym without saying a word. You were still shaken from the sight of Jonathan’s face covered in blood, even if you knew he was fine.

The awkward silence was interrupted by Jonathan clearing his throat once you reached your car.

“Do you want me to drive?” he asked with a concerned look on his face, his navy blue eyes looking for yours.

He knew exactly how you felt. He saw how your eyes were full of fear when you looked at him laying on the ground, he knew how badly that sight scared you. Afterall, he would have felt the same way if you somehow managed to get hurt.

“Let me.” he added, reaching your hands and slowly taking the car’s keys out of your grip. Placing a delicate kiss on your forehead, he entered the car and silently drove towards the neighbourhood you both lived in. He rested his hand on your thigh during the entire trip as if he wanted to reassure you, lifting it up only when he needed to change the car’s gear. When you finally arrived, he parked the car in front of his home.

“I’ve got some orange juice.” he said keeping his hand on the handbrake of the car, letting out a small laugh to lighten the tension between the two of you. You nodded in response and agreeing to his implict invite, causing Jonathan to smile.

Walking behind him, you entered the house. He extended his arm backwards, only to reach and grab your hand as both of you silently walked into the kitchen. You sat on the table as Jonathan handed you a glass of orange juice, cheering with you before taking a sip.

“Sorry.” you finally said, making Jonathan frown. “I just worried too much. It’s not because I underestimate you, I just hate the whole concept of you getting hurt.”

Jonathan cheeks flushed hearing your words, cautiously bringing himself closer to you inserting himself in the space between your legs. Towering you, he reached one of your cheeks and cupped it with his strong hands. He left a small kiss on your nose before embracing you, letting your head rest on his chest.

“I know.”

You sighed shaking your head; you were sure he had no clue about the reason why you felt this way. It wasn’t a matter of overprotectiveness, nor it was as simple as a worrying for a friend. It was love, although this meant everything and nothing at the same time.

Without any type of warning, Jonathan muscular arms picked you up. Your puzzled expression caused him to laugh, as he walked towards his bedroom and gently laid you on his bed. He handed you one of his t-shirts and laid exactly next to you, stretching his right arm over the length of the bed ready to welcome you in his arms.

“What –“ you were just about to start ranting millions questions when you saw Jonathan shaking his head in dissent.

“Would you just lie with me and just forget the world? Please?” he said, looking at you with the softest eyes you’d ever seen – he knew you just couldn’t resist his puppy eyes. And he was right, as you agreed silently, leaning your head on his chest and listening to the calming sound of his heartbeat.

“I don’t quite know how to explain what I feel,” he said, his eyes fixed on the ceiling above you. “But I’d react the same way if you’d ever got hurt.”

You looked at him, your hands caressing the wounds caused by the earlier boxing match. Your fingertips traced his handsome lineaments: his jaw, the shape of his lips, his nose; you couldn’t help  but being mesmerised by his beauty and wonder whether he ever looked at you the same way you were doing just now. If he ever shivered whenever you touched him, if he ever felt his heart pounding in his chest just because of something you said.

“It’s not the same, Jonathan.” you mumbled with a distracted tone.

“I think it is.” the sound of this words echoed inside of your head. What did he mean? Did he know? You tried to speak it felt as if words were just trapped in your throat; you gulped, trying to not let your mind jumping to conclusions.

Jonathan attentive eyes were locked on your face, following every movement of yours in hope to decipher your emotions – did he just say too much? He cleared his throat, not knowing exactly what to do. He was just as embarrassed as you were, and afraid that his feelings would have ruined everything.

You smiled as your cheeks were boiling hot, colouring your cheeks in red. You rested your forehead on his, your eyes intertwined in his. He slowly let his hands sliding along your back, stopping them on your hips as he gently put you on top of him. You’ve never been this close; you could hear his breath on your lips, you could see your reflection in his eyes – and you never looked so beautiful.

“Are you sure?” you asked whispering as your lips formed a soft smile on your face.

He smiled in response, nodding. Before you could say anything or process his response, he leaned towards you and kissed you passionately, wrapping his arms around your body as if he wanted to eliminate any space between the two of you. He wanted you closer; closer than you’ve ever been to him.

“Sure.” He replied once he broke your kiss, unable to stop himself from smiling.

[skullsandwineglasses]

The Rebel Princess First Impressions (episode 16)

My first drama of 2021 and my first drama in 4 months. 

AvenueX’s harsh review piqued my interest, especially when she mentioned the high production quality of the drama and the list of talent that was behind the production of the drama. So I went into this drama knowing nothing about the plot, having high expectations for the production, and no expectations about the characters because of AvenueX’s criticism. I’ve always respected Zhang Ziyi because of her dedication to the art and her legendary filmography, but I wouldn’t call myself a fan. I agreed with AvenueX; ZZY has an aura and elegance that’s meant for mature, cold characters, so I was wary of her playing a Mary Sue who’s innocent and doted upon. 

I first saw Zhou Yi Wei when he played Zhao Liying’s classy, composed, protective, and rich older brother in My Glamourous Times. He’s not classically handsome, but there’s a measured confidence in the way he carries himself that exudes masculinity, and that’s also balanced by his more feminine qualities like his quiet, airy voice and his full lips. He also has an intense gaze that feels like he’s looking straight into the soul of whoever he’s speaking to. 

I also watched ZZY and ZYW’s collaboration on I Am an Actor, so I knew that the chemistry would be there between them. 

Okay, so enough preamble. Spoilers ahead. 

First 8 episodes:

I didn’t mind ZZY playing a young teenager. Yes, it does take a bit of getting used to, but kind of like the CGI in The Irishman, but it very soon doesn’t become distracting and you manage to suspend your disbelief. I came in expecting the worse, like an exaggerated caricature, but ZZY actually pulls it off quite well. Since this is a coming-of-age drama, it’s a given that the first few episodes are going to be about a main character who starts off as innocent, naive, and carefree. I’d rather have the main actress portray these young scenes than to have a completely differ actress do this. The first few episodes are meant to anchor you emotionally into the drama and to empathize with the FL. If you introduced ZZY after 8 episodes, you wouldn’t really emotionally connect with her since the trauma that catapults the character into maturity was experienced by the younger actress. So for me, the age was a non-issue. I was concerned that it would be cringey, but it wasn’t. It’s called acting ffs. Why can people play older characters when they’ve never been older, but people can’t play younger characters, even though they were once that age. I forgot how pretty ZZY is though. 

Sure, the FL is a Mary Sue, but I didn’t find her annoying. Maybe it’s because ZZY makes it work. Who knows. Essentially, everyone dotes in her, every man has a crush on her. She’s spoiled, she’s kind. She’s perfect. Her lineage is incomparable and powerful (even if a little incestuous). Not to mention a little corrupt as well. I guess she wasn’t annoying because she doesn’t try hard to be righteous. She has a privileged life and she’s just living with what she’s given. She only asks that she is able to have a love marriage instead of an arrange marriage. Typical, but understandable. 

My complaint is that I didn’t feel any chemistry between her and Zi Tan, the second prince. Unlike Ming Lan and Yuan Ruo in Story of Ming Lan, Awu’s first love just didn’t capture the imagination. Maybe it’s because ZYW’s Xiao Qi stole the show from early on, which made it hard to jump on board Zi Tan’s ship. 

Awu and Xiao only had a handful of interactions, but their chemistry is palpable (ZYW’s gaze is just....ugh swoon). They first meet that night at the festival where she unknowingly insults him and then he saves her and Zi Tan later that night. Then a couple episodes later, he saves her again when she falls off the roof during her escape from the crown prince. They only cross paths briefly 2 times in 4 episodes, and one of those times they weren’t even talking to ech other because she faints, and yet he’s totally taken by her. He’s a goner. But he know she’s out of his league, and so he keeps his feelings to himself, even though he can’t stop thinking about her and stays up at night staring at the moon remembering their 2 encounters. Talk about a slow burn. Insta love shouldn’t work, but again, it does here. 

I like Xiao Qi’s character. He doesn’t speak much, he doesn’t emote much, but he’s not the typical cold, distant, irritable ML from idol dramas. Xiao Qi isn’t afraid to love. He’s tender, gentle, composed, and calm. The sexual tension between him and Awu from when he rescued her to when they consummate their marriage is through the roof. He takes on the role of a husband by taking care of her, entrusting her fully with managing his household, puts her above everything else in his life, and always takes her side. He closes the distance between them while still giving her space, respecting her, and waiting until she’s ready. Even though he initially thought of himself ill-suited for her, once they’re married, he slowly wins her over. Episode 13 is obviously my favourite because that’s when Awu finally warms up to him. 

Honestly, this relationship only works because of the smitten looks that Xiao Qi gave her that night when they first met at the festival. Those few intrigued/amused looks carry this relationship for 13 episodes. And I love how he brings up that night again when he’s caring for her after he rescued her from Helan Zhen. 

Speaking of Helan Zhen, I find it funny how it sounds like Helian Zheng from The Rise of Phoenixes, and it’s played by the same actor too (edit: NOT the same actor. This is Yuan Hong who played Jin Si Yu in TROP, and a more veteran actor than than the one who played Helian Zheng. Should have known that ZZY would pick Justin Hong who has much more acting experience. TBF tho, with the facial hair, they look similar) and has similar costuming. 

In terms of the political storyline, it’s not bad, but it’s not great, so I see AvenueX’s criticism here. I haven’t watched too many political intrigues, but so far, nothing has been overly surprising or shocking. 

The level of acting and production definitely lives up to expectations, although I have noticed some jumpy cuts. Some of the night scenes in the palace also look kind of CGI though, especially the sky. 

General Song is great. The ML always has a loyal sidekick. The FL also always has a loyal maid, and a disloyal maid who betrays her. In this sense, the drama is quite formulaic. 

It’s also nice to see Kara Hui and Angie Chiu act opposite each other. Angie Chiu is obviously speaking cantonese, and it looks like Kara Hui also speaks cantonese when she has a scene with Angie Chiu, maybe to help her get immersed into the scene. 

Overall Impressions: My basic self is only watching this for the romance, which so far has been slow and minimal (but really good). Xiao Qi is completely absent in episode 16 unfortunately, which is about Awu gaining the respect of his army. 

I do think this is a good spot to pause though. There’s no angst yet. Awu and Xiao Qi are at a good place in their relationship, even if they’re temporarily physically separated for now. Emotionally, they trust each other. It’s them against the world. 

But I’m worried about the upcoming episodes. Based on comments from MyDramaList, it sounds like there are going to be misunderstandings by around episode 33ish, which I’m not happy about. I was hoping that it would be similar to Ming Lan and Gu Tingye’s relationship dynamic where they trust each other fully and there are no secrets or misunderstandings, and they work together against the antagonistic forces opposing them. But it sounds like the drama is going, to well, stir up drama between the leads. 

I powered through 16 episodes in 2 days, and only 41 raw episodes have been released. Which means that I’ll probably catch up within the next few days, and then I’ll have to play the waiting game until the finale at the end of February. So I’ll just take a pause now before things ramp up and I get too attached and maybe watch something else before coming back to binge this. 

[lemonietrinket]

Extra Special ||| Ending Four - Lucas

Summary: Lucas x Reader; ft Jungwoo & Reader Genre: Fluff, some accidental (soft) angst but a very happy ending Warning(s): Small references to insecurities of not being good enough for someone Word Count: 3323 + 9 ss of texts Theme Song: Starmarker - Kana Boon, Day and Night - Day6 AN: Lucas’ ending for my masterpiece Love—I recommend reading it first (but it is 20k and I think this pretty much functions as a oneshot too tbf)

~~~

Chucking your head back in utter hysterics, you accidentally whacked your cranium against the wooden headboard with a resounding thud. It didn’t hurt at all, but the sheer volume sent Xuxi gasping for air as you pretty much froze, eyes squeezed between tears of laughter. If you weren’t already running out of breath, the shriek from the next room over would knock all the wind out of you for sure.

“HEY!”

It was Ten, sounding as frazzled as his hair probably looked at that moment, and you had to bite your lip to restrain yourself from straight out cackling at his tone. Your good friend and comedian—and the reason why you were in this state in the first place—was practically wheezing beside you on the bed, his large hands clapping like a seal while he desperately tried to restrain them and keep them quiet. Not that he really could, but that was ok—it was just another thing that was damn near irresistible about him.

It was late at night, and though Ten’s sleep schedule was hardly any good (if you hadn’t been crying with laughter you would have perhaps pulled up the hypocrisy of Ten complaining about noise) it hardly made you and Xuxi’s impromptu slumber party strictly speaking allowed. So you really had to keep the noise down. However, your friend had other ideas, seemingly desperate to make it as hard as possible to stifle your laughter.

Still shaking in silent laughter, you brought a finger to your lips as best you could, urging Xuxi to be quiet. Not that your heart was in it, and it reflected in your response to his, snorting into another bout as he hunched himself over and shook exaggeratedly with a finger up, a caricature of you. The sound of your joy just sent him into laughing outright once again too, and so you continued to regain no sense of control.

You’d been caught in such giddiness for so long that you couldn’t even remember what you’d started laughing at to begin with, but you could hazard a guess. Xuxi himself, whether intentionally or unintentionally, was a comedic genius; to the point that even his pauses for thought were funny. That wide grin that brightened the room could coax anyone into smiling with him, and his vibrancy could never be competed. He was a ray of sunshine, no doubt about it.

So you supposed it was no surprise that he made you feel some kind of way.  Wanting to hear that loud voice and listen to his latest minor epiphany, wanting to experience that simple childlike joy that he carried with him, and wanting even more.

Wishing you could hold his hand properly rather than just compare the sizes of them and instead properly feel the warmth he radiated through his touch, longing to be delightfully swamped by his tall figure and toned arms as he held you close against the cold, comfort him when he was struck by tinges of sadness or doubt, become his rock and keep him safe. 

Because after the previous months and that night single bad day, it became clear to you there was no one that could make you happier—and what more could you want in life, to be happy?

The coalescence of thoughts changed your giddy laughter into a softer haze, as though you fell from your humoured high, you remained as happy as a free kite. 

You let the air return to your lungs, wiping your cheeks free of the only tears that you were sure Xuxi could ever cause, and took in the sight of him instead. He’d flopped onto the mattress, a single lock of hair curling sweetly across his perfect face, sporting that charismatic grin. You watched him gradually follow suit, letting his hands fall to his broad chest and beginning to breathe properly once again. It took a surprising amount of effort to not just lay on top of him and let him sling an arm around your waist. You could feel the phantom caress of his fingers against your skin, easing through your hair as he giggled at something nondescript and completely unrelated to anything you could imagine. 

You couldn’t join him quite like that, so you settled for just laying next to him. Head sinking into the pillow, you were surrounded by his scent and it made your heart leap. Add it to the list of things that made him irresistible. 

Hearing him chuckle, you peered over to him, having to push the side of the pillow out of the way to see him properly. “What?”

“You’re so tiny,” he whispered, as if it was a secret that nobody else was aware of. 

You decided to play along. “Am I?” you asked incredulously, as if it was the first you’d heard of it from anyone, let alone him.

He rolled onto his side, nodding assuredly. “Yeah!”

“Oh my god,” you muttered, “I’ve been tiny this whole time?!”

He hummed, hands tucking beneath his pillow as if he needed to keep them warm. It always surprised you how small he could be, scrunching himself up and enunciating so softly despite his volume. He was just a big friendly puppy really, and with a mental sigh you had to admit you were whipped for him.

“How did I not notice that?” You trailed off into giggles, wondering just how someone could be so precious and not realise it (and then you had to consider that he did know, and chose to do it anyway, which was a startling conclusion because the way he made your heart leap was unfair, and if he was doing it deliberately...)

There was a pling from his bedside table, and Xuxi rolled over haphazardly after a few moments with a pout to see who it was. However, as soon as the screen lit up his smile brightened even more, and that could only mean one person.

“Jungwoo’s still up?” you asked incredulously. You’d expected him to be more sensible but then again you two were still up so you couldn’t tell him off for it—not that you ever would. 

“Yeah!” Xuxi showed his phone to you as if you wouldn’t believe him otherwise. You meanwhile didn’t look any further than Jungwoo’s name on his phone. 

“Snoop pup?!” you cried, forced to slap a hand over your mouth once again as Xuxi began to giggle.

“Genius right?”

“Sure?”

You watched quietly as he sent some messages to his friend in the other dorms, sinking back into the pillow and pulling the covers up to your cheeks. They were really soft and you couldn’t help but just breathe in his scent and get lost in it. 

And as soon as you came back into the real world, you were completely distracted by his profile. He dazzling eyes, sculpted jaw, his strong neck leading down into his broad shoulders and prominent collarbones peeking out from his tank top.  You were getting to the point of no return, you supposed. You didn’t just like him as a good friend, it was much more than that. You just hoped he felt the same way, otherwise this would be a heartbreak like no other.

Feeling the stab of hurt in your chest at even paying a single second of thought to that you realised you needed to change tact before you ended up getting swallowed whole and ruining your mood for the rest of the night.

Luckily, some fortune was on your side, and no sooner had the thought crossed your mind, Xuxi was handing you his phone.

“Do you want snacks?”

You nodded firmly. “Yes please! Oh and can you get the lemonade from down in the fridge?”

“You bought lemonade?” It was Xuxi’s turn to be excited. After catching your hum, he immediately rolled off the bed. “Hell yeah! Keep Woo company while I’m gone, ok?”

You rolled your eyes with a laugh. “You know I will.”

You couldn’t imagine Xuxi being any sadder than he had been when Woo told him he wasn’t well.  Even so, how could have been over you?

You felt yourself dipping into the negative spiral again, questioning every little detail you could remember in the way Xuxi behaved towards you and carved it down until you decided there was no chance that he liked you in return.

‘He just sees you as a friend,’ you thought to yourself, ‘besides, this can’t be true. It’s just a difference in perspectives.’

Reading his message once before putting the phone face down on the bed, you sat up and curled your body by the headboard. 

You’d discerned nothing special about Xuxi’s behaviour towards you, so why would Woo insinuate the opposite? You trusted him, of course, but it didn’t add up.

You weren’t what he was looking for. You were just his friend. He could do much better than you. You weren’t—

Before you could question it any further there was a thunk as the man in question stumbled through the door, long arms stacked with food. Sweet packets, a savoury something or other, your favourite crisps—you looked at it all and suddenly felt a loss of appetite.  You cursed at yourself in your head. You knew not to let the negativity get the better of you, yet you’d allowed it to anyway.

Sighing, you put on a smile in an effort to rectify the issue, centring your focus on Xuxi’s bright smile as he approached the bed. 

“I got everything I...” he began, depositing everything in the middle of the bed before he looked back up at you. He went quiet for a moment, his grin faltering as soon as his shining eyes met yours.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” you enquired as he knelt on the mattress.

Shuffling on his knees awkwardly, he came to a stop just before your raised knees. With a tone more serious than you’d anticipated he said, “Why do you have the sad eyes again?”

You were stunned into a lacking a response. You’d gathered you hid your doubts and insecurities and bouts of worry well, and that Xuxi would be the last one to notice—he was constantly away in his own world and seeking joy, what did that have to do with you?

“I... don’t know what you mean,” you deflected weakly.

His eyes flickered across your cheeks and down to your crestfallen lips before he answered you. “You didn’t have them before I left, but now I’m back so are they,” he explained, “it only happens sometimes, but when they turn up you look all distant.” He paused. “Did I do something?”

‘Yes’, you wanted to say, ‘yes you did, you made me fall head over heels for you by being all irresistible and now I don’t know what to do about it.’

But you knew that would be cruel as it wasn’t actually his fault, and neither could you admit anything. 

“No, no, it’s not your fault! It’s...”

You’d never seen such a look on Xuxi’s face. It was as if all the energy had left him, his plush lips set in a firm downturned line and a light frown on his face. His hands sat by his knees all while his eyes, dim and dejected, refused to leave yours and so you were pushed to pull away instead. He was dead serious, the silliness gone, and a strange determination in his focus.

Wait was this what Jungwoo had meant?

“If anyone or anything hurt you then please tell me,” he practically pleaded, “I’ll fix it. I promise. Even if it’s me.”

His words were doing a further number on your heart, resounding loyalty and security with sincerity you’d never felt, and quickly the faked smile slid from your face as guilt rippled beneath your skin. “I-I know, I would... tell you, Xuxi, it’s just this is one of those things that—”

“I don’t want a repeat of the other day, Y/N,” he interjected apologetically, and though he didn’t specify much, you knew exactly which day he was referring to, “I didn’t realise how bad it was, how hard it must have been for you. It wasn’t until Kun told me how he’d found you that...” he seemed pained, his gaze falling only at this point, meanwhile your head was reeling at how the situation was digressing and how you’d even gotten there in the first place. 

“And I was hardly there for you,” he finally continued, his voice much stronger and more resolute.

“But that wasn’t your fault!” you cried, “That was your schedule, please don’t blame yourself for that.”

Xuxi offered you a small smile. “I know, but I still never want that to happen again.”

You didn’t know what you were expecting to follow, but it certainly wasn’t what did. 

“Y/N, I realised after that conversation that I wanted to always be there for you and help you,” he said, words seemingly tumbling from his mouth with the light returning to his eyes as he spoke, “so I want to make sure that you’re happy, and that the sad eyes don’t come back.”

Feeling your heart pumping in overdrive, you felt your thoughts clash. You were internally celebrating at hearing how much you meant to him, while also feeling guilty for even considering confessing and wanting to effectively put it on the line on the off-chance of something ‘more’.

“I don’t think this is a problem you can fix, though,” you uttered simply, unable to manage any more. 

To your heart’s further fear of absolute combustion, Xuxi leant in, his hand absentmindedly settling on your knee. His touch sent shocks through your skin, his warmth then seeping in to soothe, and you barely registered what he said next.

“At least let me try!”

His pout and desperate eyes were the final straw. You haphazardly picked up his phone, fingers mildly numb from feeling his just barely caressing your thigh. 

He unlocked it without hesitation, eyes scouring the messages that immediately flashed upon the screen.

Worlds flooded from you, then. “He’s mistaken, right? Woo doesn’t... I’m confused, what does he mean?

He didn’t reply right away, not until he was finished reading enough of the messages. He subsequently abandoned his phone amongst the blankets before bringing both hands to gently hold your knees. The contact startled you, while he barely seemed to register it, gazing into your eyes alone.

“No, he’s right, I was very sad with you gone.”

“Because you—?”

“Because I missed you so much,” he admitted, nodding encouragingly, “because the person who always laughs with me wasn’t there to laugh, because she was ill and it wasn’t fair, she didn’t deserve it. I was worried, as I couldn’t do anything about it, I couldn’t help her, I couldn’t even make her smile because she was on the other side of town where my schedule wouldn’t let me go. And I was more upset than I was with any of the others because she is extra special to me.”

You stared at him, regarding nothing but his words. Sheer disbelief left you dumb—you were “extra special” to this irresistible man, the one that captured your gaze and made you smile without fail.

“Y/N?” he called to your distant mind. “Y/N, you’re extra special to me, so special. Please let me help—”

“The sad eyes were because of you,” you gushed, hands reaching for his at your knees, “not because you did anything bad, but because you’re extra special to me too. And it hurts.”

Silence settled over the two of you, before the corners of Xuxi’s lips twitched and suddenly he was smiling. His frown faded, his eyes brightened, the energy returning to him and subsequently the room. You were confused for a few moments, until his hands shifted away from your knees and instead held your fingers between his. 

With the pad of his thumb caressing your bare skin, he exhaled in his usual big, exaggerated manner, “Oh my god, really?! You—?!”

Relief flooding your system, your shoulders relaxed as you sighed, a genuine smile taking to your features this time, “Yes.”

It was as if the weight of the Earth had lifted from your shoulders in seconds. Meanwhile Xuxi was ecstatic.

“Wait... me?!”

“Yes, you!”

“You and me?!”

You giggled, feeling the hazy giddiness of mutual love dispel all of your fears.. “Yes, Xuxi!”

He laughed out loud. “Oh my god! Does that mean I’m your boyfriend?”

“Unless you’d rather be something else,” you chuckled, as he shook his head avidly.

“No I’m your boyfriend now—oh my god I’m your boyfriend. You’re my girlfriend,” Xuxi raised your interlinked hands and squeezed them with another joyous laugh, “wait does this mean we can call each other cute things?”

“I hoped we would, but—”

It was too late, your new boyfriend was already set off listing possible pet-names, and as you only realised too late, none of them were within the acceptable realms.

“Cutie pie!”

“Uh, maybe not—”

“Cutie Patootie!”

“Xuxi—”

“Baby Cakes!”

“Xuxi—”

“Schnucki!”

You hushed him quickly with a finger by his lips. Your reflexes very nearly pulled you away from him, a remaining piece of your hesitant self that you’d been mere minutes prior. But you didn’t need to hide your feelings anymore, and you could be close to the man of your dreams now. His close proximity was free for you now, as long as he wanted it too of course. 

There was no question about that though, as he pressed a playful kiss against your surprise technique, and then the quiet was broken by his gasp. “Oh my god I can kiss you now, right? Can I kiss you? Is that ok?”

Heart leaping in your chest you unfurled your legs and knelt with him. “Of course you can.”

His fingers left yours to immediately greet your approaching body, one hand cupping your cheek as the other found its home at your waist, pulling you closer. 

“You have no idea how lo—” he began, but you cut him off, too eager to feel his lips against yours. 

Kissing him deeply you could barely breathe. His hair was so soft in your hands as you threaded them through absentmindedly, and his lips were divine—plush and gentle and welcoming they melded with yours perfectly, coaxing you into a urgent tranquil while your heart pounded.

Needing you closer, Xuxi with eyes fluttering closed shifted his weight and let himself fall onto his back, cradling you so you came down with him safe and sound.  With your chest flush against his he finally felt content, allowing him to sink into your caress completely. You tasted so sweet that his head emptied and he didn’t mind it one bit. You fit against him as if you were crafted for one another and he was certain you could thus feel the thrum at his ribcage, but he made no attempt to shy away or deflect—he knew you didn’t mind, and that yours was the same. 

You hummed softly before you pulled away to catch your breath, hair tipping into your face as you took in the sight of what you now had. Xuxi gently eased the tresses away, grinning dopily at you hovering above him. “You’re so beautiful.”

“So are you.” 

You leant back down to plant a kiss on his cheek, before shuffling down so you could lay your head comfortably on his chest. Xuxi instinctively wrapped his arms around you to support you, nestling his nose into your crown as he murmured, “I promise I’ll always support you, schnucki.”

Your heart had practically sang at his vow until the final bit, at which you laughed, nuzzling into his neck out of cringe. “Oh my god, please...!”

He hummed a ‘no’, embracing you tighter. “You’re my schnucki now. It’s done.”

You groaned, a smile plastered on your face. “Yangyang is going to regret ever introducing you to that.” 

~~~

AN: I got one done! after all that stalling im not crying i swear

also i know theres not a lot of luwoo going around nowadays but i think its really cute ok so im still here for it alright

also i feel like im going to hate this tomorrow so like please dont mind the saccharine fluff please dont blame me i was listening to happy songs and it just

yeah

Masterlist

[adventure-hearts]

20th Anniversary = 20 questions (Day 16 / 21)

 FEB 16: A FAVOURITE KIZUNA CHARACTER PROFILE

Difficult choice, but probably Yamato’s.

So much new information in such a short paragraph!

He’s studying science and engineering. For many years, people have been wondering how Yamato got to be an astronaut, to the point when some even speculated that he would have just been recruited due to his special status as a Chosen Child. Many thought that the army, or the Air Force, would have been a more natural path for someone like him. But the fact that they went with the aerospace engineering path is so much more rewarding and interesting! I love that it confirms two things that were always kind of “fanon-y” about Yamato: 1) he’s (academically) intelligent and curious and 2) he combines brains with a practical side, being someone who actually likes to get things done. This is a new side of Yamato, which hopefully shows that he’s developing his rational, practical side a bit more, rather than just live in his feelings all the time. It also opens a lot more possibilities for the character and his relationships with others, now that he is officially one of the Smart Ones in the Team. Will he and Koushirou talk about nerdy stuff together (this is honestly the friendship I want to see more of now)? How much do Takeru and Taichi tease him about his nerdy proclivities?

He stopped playing in his band. There you go, folks! RIP, Yamato’s “promising music career”. I always found it surprising how many people imagined Yamato would grow up to be an actual rock star because he had some bands in school. Was he really that good? (Also, he’s a bass player. Insert your favourite bass player joke here.)    

He still enjoys music as a hobby. Well, of course he does. Do you think he’s going to throw his harmonica in the bin? No, my feeling is that Yamato is simply evolving to the next level of music lover — from someone who plays music to one of those annoying connoisseurs who take music as a sacred experience, who have very strict opinions and impossible standards, and live to collect records and attend gigs every chance they can. “I know enough about music to know we sucked.” — Yamato on KOD, probably.

Now he’s into motorcycles. MY FAVOURITE PART. Yamato having a motorcycle is basically the inevitable sept in the whole “Yamato is a Cool Guy” vibe (check: the scene in the trailer where he removes his helmet in slo-mo, to reveal his immaculate hair). Having a motorcycle is kind of the Boomer idea of “Cool, rebellious young man”, so I’m living for it. Also, it is a logical step from spending all of your life riding a literal giant magical wolf into battle. I was a huge fan of Yamato’s blue vespa in tri., so it’s nice to see he’s updated into something better. I expect Yamato to be really obsessed with motorcycles and to know all there is to know about them, and him becoming an engineer probably is very related to this new interest. He’s going to be as particular about it as he is about ramen.

Yamato has decided to go on to graduate school, in order to study more and have time to truly find himself. Relatable Millennial King! TBF, I like this idea that Yamato has some kind of vague idea about being an astronaut (or at least do something space-related), but that it takes a few years for him to develop and mature that dream into something concrete. Maybe he’s even a little shy about this very ambitious and unlikely plan. And, of course, being unsatisfied about his current life and identity and looking for future possibilities is a classic Yamato move. The guy won’t do anything unless it feels 100% authentic and meaningful. (He’s such a Type 4 personality).

Honourable mentions and special things I liked:

Koushirou being a “driving force behind community activities for the DigiDestined Chosen Children, who’ve spread all around the world” — I just love Koushirou being the one person who brings people together. Character growth!

Mimi being the superior version of Kylie Jenner and probably the first one to become a billionaire.

Jou being a 5th year medical student who’s had little practice and who’s probably livid at the realization that he’ll never stop studying, harder and harder .

Takeru joining a children’s literature club (whatever that means). I hope he’s writing lots of Harry Potter fanfiction.

Ken studying psychology is so incredibly fitting, I have no words. Also, it warms my heart to see him socializing. 

Miyako having the best life and being a baddass. 

Iori still being in the Kendo club is amazing. He’s probably lethal at this point.

[shy-magpie]

RQG 152

Poor Alex, there was no way to know and changing the story would be more of a breach of the implied contract than going forward. Plus side this warning implies we'll get more info on how the biology of the infection works before RSB actually explodes. To be clear I am all for warnings, I just imagine this was one heck of an awkward position for Alex & co to find themselves in. Well one would think they wanted to get through the intros as fast as physically possible! Seriously bless em for sticking with the structure instead of saying screw it and diving right in. Must be frustrating but it really helps me get in the right space to listen. Yeah it was a bit of an altruism run. That Ben physically ill at the prospect of characters talking? Yuck it up, I was specifically promised three (3) distinct topics would be addressed including both coping mechanisms and back stories. Poor Azu. If someone doesn't hold her while she has a proper cry I will be an unhappy Magpie. Are the new kids going to be invited to the conversations that are totally for sure not going to be put off for a month? Retcon: Barnes and Carter actually fought well it. I guess they were just down to the tricky ones. Theatrical much? Cel is great, have I said that enough? Well obviously not it should be declared at least hourly: "2 o' clock and Cel is great". But right after last episode instead of backing down (and IDK implying Wilde told the new kids their pronouns), Cel is immediately introducing themself with them and emphasizing their importance. Hamid right in there with the leadership, telling the duo that the party needs to go into isolation. I know having Zolf around must have took some weight off his shoulders but the man has grown since season one or even since Prague. He didn't lose that just because he cheers up when not solely responsible for leading the party. Note there is a messy negotiation with Zolf about who is in charge coming up and it is a mark of my trust in this show that I'm not dreading it. Am curious if it will be explicit enough for the white picket fence kids to pick up on, I know I have a thing about rank but some people seem to miss that aspect entirely. OK point Zolf but even with his charisma score there has to be a better way to put it than "do that and you are responsible for infecting Jasper and the village". Wow I guess that is the case isn't it. Thank you leader!Hamid coming in again. Getting Cel the kind of updates on home Hamid was denied in quarantine is fairly low risk for great gains in Cel's comfort with the whole thing. Point of clarity: as much as I hate to admit it, once the quarantine began they couldn't really keep Hamid in the loop since Ishaq was in the care of the Harlequins. Its been implied even without simply escaping an infected person could have means of communication that work in am anti magic cell. The village however is public info. Zolf, I want that again in small words! Are we talking black death or infrastructure problems? Because a few targeted infections could take out the government but not directly kill the citizens. Cel is doing the forced cheer again. What the hell have they been through that they default to words of affirmation for gory violence? Like most characters acknowledge the gore or that it was helpful, not both. Barnes is more reserved outside of the fight. Issues? Trauma? Oh Helen spelling it out, he's my type, crap. "Emotionally unavailable pirate" is a lot of people's type TBF. No wonder I made a warding gesture on hearing Zolf's description and didn't warm up till Dover. These characters wear the red flag as a cape and I'm surprised when my heart gets broken every time. Eh Zolf came back and is doing well enough, maybe Barnes will turn out to just not be chatty vs heart rending. And Hamid in there with the initiative casting Detect Magic so they don't have to face all the risks implied with not checking over the bodies. Barnes and Carter are glowing "like a fireworks factory where things have gone wrong". Only Water Breathing on the mooks. Speaking of emotionally unavailable pirates, Zolf sounds resigned as hell. I know he's working on it but the situation would depress anyone and he's been having a time of it, what with the puzzles and all. Shutting down isn't actually coping better than being shouty just more convenient. Have I already mentioned I want someone to comfort Azu on screen so she can put herself first for once? Remember how bright she shone in Cairo? If she doesn't process soon she's going to echo Zolf's arc. Carter is trying to looking at the bright side. Thank you Ben and Alex, not only a mood lightener but one that reminds us that Zolf asks direct questions now. And Zolf just moved as clearly as possible to protect Azu after Carter lashed out in response to her. I know they have a ways to get to where Grizzop & Azu were but I think they are at least proper team mates. Maybe having Zolf on this side of the bars this time will ease anything Azu is carrying from their introduction. Cel is a delight. Did they just suggest hamster balls? I love how Alex jokes about his own set design. Ah there is Ben's Minecraft joke. I think that's what you call environmental story telling. I love the mental image of them making their entrance crashing the mine cart into the ambush, like half way between a roller-coaster and sledding. Ah its been so long Zolf can't apply his memories of mining. They are officially out! Azu and Zolf are finally breathing right. Hey Zolf broke the weather machine! Cel takes a look see. Plumes of smoke from Shoin's? Wreckage from all the storms. Zolf joins Cel and USES HIS WORDS! I am so proud of him. Like not kidding learning to proactively offer praise & comfort instead of only offering concrete assistance in reaction is a huge step. Oh Cel! Getting yourself killed fighting alone would not have been better than defending your patch. And Zolf is right there, god remember Paris? Remember Prague? Now look at him. And there is the reality check. Not as jarring as it could have been. Azu is face down on the ground near Hamid! No more putting on her game face and slogging through it! Yes, process all you need darlin, no reason to rush. Hamid checks in! Azu takes his hand and explicitly talks about how scary it was when he was missing. Hamid talks about putting on a brave face for Skraak! RQG really just said "we're giving the fandom everything they want" in an episode recorded before we had a chance to ask. Azu checks in with Hamid! Oh Hamid its ok not to be ok. Oh hat Azu! Hamid call your family 18mumble is a go! Alex I will scream if he gets another delaying tactic. Cross your fingers we might get Ishaq and Saira! Azu assures him it would OK. Timing Zolf Horses! Topaz! Barnes: right Well that's a fair reaction to a celestial camel, he doesn't even know what the T stands for. Azu hugs Topaz Thank you Alex for making judgmental celestial camel canon.  How GMs don't all go insane with power from the moment it hits they can rewrite their world on a whim is beyond me. A Shetland for Hamid, a standard sounding horse for Cel, a cart horse for Azu, and another Shetland for Zolf. Carter can't get the question out before Zolf shuts him down. He is sticking to his word to Skraak, the island belongs to the Kobolds. Hamid calls en route! Bryn remembers to roll for it! Ishaq is a great kid, such a good sign he sounds like a kid too. Yes the kids are all together in the country house! Dad is at a redacted location, thank you Alex! Mom is alright! Saira is busy and the biggest problem with Ismail is that he is now taller than Ishaq! Ismail is good at magic too. Family bonding time. Einstein is working. Emeka & Veseek are helping things. Ed is with the family. Zolf is not happy about the call. Fair Zolf but none of us are regretting that call. Eh it being a one time thing is fair. Have I mentioned I like how Hamid & Zolf bicker? Its not like with Grizzop. They assume good faith and argue about the issue not score points. Part of why I shipped them in the beginning honestly: charismatic as Hamid is he probably impressioned like a duck on the first person to care more about what he was saying than how he said it. They joke about how hard nonverbal shots are in a podcast. Yes Alex we really do respect your craft. Might have been reassuring Ben. Helen is on the audience's side as always and tells him to pay up on the promised coping mechanisms talk. And Alex makes them roll a perception check. Do not talk block. Carter has been trying to eavesdrop. Azu tells him he isn't invited and Zolf tosses something at his head. Carter slinks back off. Zolf is still not good with words but he is resisting the urge to take it back. That counts damn it! Azu: your not good at talking for someone who says we need to talk. Yes Azu, and thats what makes it special. He is willing to put himself out there and do things he is bad at for the sake of the team. I like how Helen plays Azu getting over her issues with Zolf rather than just leaping to "Hamid vouched for you so we're besties". I need a clip of this, Zolf is offering to listen and be there while respecting boundaries and citing his own experience. Helen is great, Azu jumps right into the 18 months by asking about his relationship with Poseidon. Which again makes sense, as Azu is still working on "we met after you drugged, trapped, and imprisoned me". Which I get but seriously couldn't it have been in the stew or something? Drugging a woman's drink has connotations. Azu backstory(ish) oh thank Alex her cult is still doing the good work. Zolf tells Azu this, and offers her an out? Hamid & Zolf offer reassurance. Yes Hamid specifically tells her it isn't her fault. Zolf assures her that she isn't responsible for Sasha's decisions. Cel and Carter are chatting about what they've seen on the island.  Barnes tells them to keep the volume down and does Zolf's thing of bouncing something off Carter's head when he's loud again. Hamid moves to check in with Cel. Cel calls him on it.  Hamid asks what Cel plans to do after quarantine! Thank you Bryn! Cel doesn't know, ow. Cel feels obligated to be more proactive. Hamid reassures and points out that they were able to do it as a team so its not on Cel for not acting alone. Cel what is your backstory, afraid of being the monster. Thank you, I could wrap myself in this episode like a blanket. Cel how do you know that about being friends with mercs? Hamid would do it again but wants them to have a choice. Cel: When I call you little buddy I m not referring to the size of your heart. And that was veering saccharine so Ben swoops in with the Harrison Campbell joke. Do not make me get into why Hamid might be using snobbery as a cover for continuing to care more about what people might think than what he wants. Its a cheap shot for what could equally be he's that age and still has some flaws to work through. Thank you Alex for being realistic about horse pace without turning it into a word problem. Wilde! Cel points out the inn keeper could be infected, the boys explain the system of watching one another. Zolf is not letting Wilde get cute with his team again. Wilde wants them "fully supervised" in the bath. I feared that Alex, Wilde turned himself off again. Zolf calls him on it, kinda. They skim past the bath, thank you that could have been problematic. Thank goodness they are leaving the cell door open but locking the trap door. The new kids are in quarantine with them. Fair, going to be fun, but fair.  

[hannahchuu]

I was tagged by @makeitpoppy 💕😍

Are you staying at home from work/school?

So, I haven't been to work since beginning of March but I have to go back there next week (for now it's just a meeting bc I'm working in a hotel & my schedule depends on the amount of guests we have). I've been really happy about that tho bc I still get paid & just before the pandemic happend, I got really overwhelmed by my work & started to hate it a lot. I also had some issues with a colleague & I dread having to see her again. I had really wished that I wouldn't have to go back there anytime soon.

University has also been cancelled after only one regular week & I only have online classes now. Tbf tho, I would've only had one class overall this semester bc I'm in my last semester of university & only my master's thesis is left. My only class is a Japanese conversation class, which is online now & I'm really struggling with the format lol. It's so odd to have to talk to people when you can't see them & half the time you also can't hear them properly.

As for my master's thesis...at first I was fine with quarantine & uni being cancelled bc I thought it'd give me time to focus on my thesis but unexpectedly libraries also closed for two months & I wasn't able to get any books until beginning of May. So I basically didn't do anything at home ahaha.

If you’re at home, who is there with you?

No one. My mum used to be there occasionally but she has since gone to her boyfriend's house and rarely ever comes. (Which is totally fine btw. She really stresses me out lol)

Do you have pets to keep you company?

No 💔

Who do you miss the most?

I have social anxiety so I'm actually quite happy about not having to see anyone. I also feel like I talk (via phone) to my friends & family way more often now. I do however, miss certain activities like going shopping with my friends. Oh & hugs! I also miss my sister & her girlfriend bc it's always fun being around them. And I miss the people in my Japanese class. Online classes really take away the social aspects of it (Like talking with people before & after).

When was the last time you left your home?

Yesterday! I went to the supermarket bc my fridge was v v empty. The last time I left to go somewhere else was last Thursday when I went to the library.

What was the last thing you bought?

The last thing I bought in person was food. Last online purchase were face masks (as in sheet masks) ahaha.

Is quarantine driving you insane or are you finally relaxed?

I'm sort of relaxed? Like more relaxed than usual I think. I'm a bit stressed out about my future bc I'm right at the end of my university education & I actually planned to finish my thesis & get a full-time job by the end of the year but I'm not sure whether there will still be jobs or job interviews ahahah. My thesis also stresses me out a bit. But I think all of this would've also stressed me out w/o quarantine so overall I'm relaxed. I'm getting stressed out by the prospect of going back to work tho.

Are you a homebody?

Yessssss

What movies have you watched recently?

So I was planning on watching tons of films during quarantine but I haven't watched any so far ahahah

I mainly watch anime & YouTube

An event you were looking forward to that got cancelled?

Two anime conventions I've been going to religiously with my friends T_T

What’s the worst thing you’ve had to cancel?

My Japan trip. It would've been my very first trip to Japan but a week before we were due to leave Austria issued a travel warning for all countries. Later on all tourists arriving in Japan also had to quarantine themselves for 2 weeks. I was super upset about having to cancel it but also sort of relieved bc I wouldn't have wanted to go there in the middle of a pandemic. I also got all of my money refunded so yay.

What’s the best thing you had to cancel?

Any kind of social interaction and work ahahhahaha

Do you have any new hobbies?

Not really. Before I started working on my thesis, I studied Japanese more frequently but that's about it.

What are you out of?

Skincare! I put off ordering any new items bc I was supposed to go to Japan & I thought I could just buy everything there. Well, now I'm out of toner, essence, a good cleanser and face masks :(( I ended up ordering more at the end of March but my order still hasn't arrived yet (It's stuck at customs T____T)

What music are you listening to?

Mainly German Hip-Hop ahahah

What shows are you watching?

Soooo, I've literally watched 7 anime series so far:

Chobits

Kimagure Orange Road

Yuru Camp (my favourite)

Sabagebu!

Citrus

Fullmetal Alchemist

Asobi Asobase

So yeah, quite productive! I gotta focus on my thesis now tho so I’ve only been sporadically watching Ojamajo Doremi.

What are you reading?

My only goal for this quarantine was to finally read all of the books that have been piling up on my bedside table, which I did yay

I've read The Scarlet Letter, The Sailor Who Fell From Grace with the Sea (I recommend), The Moon over the Mountain, UFO In Her Eyes (I can also recommend) & In Dreams Begin Responsibilities and Other Stories.

I got 3 more books for my birthday (Poems To Fix A Fucked Up World, Japanese Tales of Mystery and Imagination & Roadqueen), which I haven't gotten around to reading yet.

What are you doing for self care?

Taking long baths & reading in the bath tub 💕 I also apply lash serum, a lip mask & body lotion every night.

Are you exercising?

Yes! I actually started exercising everyday in September & I'm still doing it yay

How’s your toilet paper supply?

I still have enough left ahahah I was supposed to be quarantined w my mum but I ended up being by myself & I don’t need a lot.

Have you made any changes to your hair?

Not yet. I've been considering getting bangs & the only thing that (luckily) is stopping me is that one tumblr post that's like you don't need bangs! you need therapy!!!!

I tag @lunarix @swaddle @motherfuckinbuddha @ive-beendreaming​ @kaizoku​ @piggiechi​ @regenbogen-flummi​ @misodelivery​ @vroomkat​ @zyphyyr​ @my-selfish-love @giantoflight @frillypinkdreams @catpacks @cupidie @emograntaire @sugarmickey @bubbleteaboy & everyone else who wants to do this