#terfs are evil there is no point arguing with them

[comicaurora]

I'm sorry that the terfs made their way onto your blog but it does feel good to see you support trans people. Thank you for that

Always.

I think, charitably, that the discourse going down on that post is an extrapolation and over-focus on one element of the point I was making: that for me, determining with certainty that I was cis was a rather fraught process. I was presented with many alternatives, but underlying their imposition on me was the oddly regressive idea that the things I liked, the principles I valued, the parts of myself I was proud of were not permitted of women. My whole life I got smacked with the background radiation that I couldn't like being strong because women aren't allowed to be stronger than men. I couldn't like being loud and boistrous because women aren't allowed to take up space. I couldn't be a math geek because women aren't smart. It was all deeply regressive misogyny from day one, but I started getting hit with it slathered in a fresh coat of paint - all those assumptions still held to be true, but now there was the out that I could do all those things if I just wasn't a woman.

Concluding that the underlying bioessentialist premise was wrong was very important. Absolutely none of those statements were true, and were only ever maintained by cultural saturation, goalpost-readjustment when they were actively disproven, and the occasional bout of lying with statistics to pretend they weren't just Shit All The Way Down. The core premise that certain things were only permitted of or possible for men was bullshit, and I didn't need to surrender the gender I liked best in order to play in the spaces I wanted to. I could simply exist the way I was already existing. I didn't need anything else.

The misinterpretation is the assumption that this being true of me means this is everybody's relationship with gender. I turned out to be cis, so for me, feeling that holding onto my assigned gender wasn't allowed was distressing - just another invocation of the same bioessentialist bullshit I'd been dealing with since the preschool playground. This is because misgendering is fundamentally denying that a person has the right to express themself the way they want. When aimed at me, it says I'm not performing traditional femininity well enough to deserve my pronouns. The same disrespect is the root of misgendering when aimed at trans people. "Perform your gender to my satisfaction or I will confiscate it."

The problem is, bioessentialism is 100% ingrained into the terf playbook, which is why, for instance, all their shitty talking points about trans athletes eventually boil down to "no woman can ever defeat a man in any contest because we are simply naturally weak and stupid and there is nothing we can do about it" and quite frankly nothing disgusts me more than the defeatist acceptance of the very lie that feminism is dedicated to overcoming. Instead of accepting that the paradigm of bioessentialism is a false dichotomy right from the jump, they embrace and weaponize it against the people whose existence proves the dichotomy is a lie. If gender essentialism is fundamentally false, then it is nobody's fucking business what anybody does with their gender. If the lines don't exist, nobody needs to enforce them. And yet there the terfs go, hunting down people whose lives are none of their business and trying to argue that they represent some great and terrible evil, some downfall of society made flesh, something that makes it totally correct and normal for them to spend so much time thinking about strangers' genitalia. They want this to be a noble crusade so badly they won't even examine what flag they're flying.

I love and support the trans people in my life and will always, always stand on the side of your right to exist, but alongside that, terf rhetoric especially disgusts and infuriates me because it is, at its heart, utter cowardice. The world told them they were weak and stupid and inferior and they fucking believed it. And now they think Fighting The Good Fight For Women means turning around and using the same paradigmatic weapon that hurt them to hurt the people whose existence outside the binary proves the weapon is a lie. They're the same shithead schoolyard bullies who made me believe my entire existence was foundationally wrong for years of my life and I will never, ever side with them or the shitty, cowardly rhetoric that contributed to the loneliest years of my life.

Figure out who you are and do it on purpose. Find the real source of the misery in your life and try fighting that instead of the other crabs in the bucket. Trans rights.

[summersreality]

Hello, I have a question as a fellow radfem!^^

I’ve been struggling to find the right people to talk to about this, since most of the radfem spaces I’m in are strictly trans exclusionary and I worry that asking questions like this might get me pushed out. I haven’t really shared my views on trans people yet, which is probably why I’m still welcome in those spaces.

As a gender abolitionist (which I am), it makes sense to oppose the concept of transgenderism, since the term itself is rooted in gender. And if we believe gender is a social hierarchy that needs to be abolished, then yes, I get why many radfems are critical of transgender ideology.

But what about transsexuals? That’s where I feel conflicted.

While I fully understand that biological sex is immutable, chromosomes can’t be changed. But I still believe transsexuality is valid in its own right. Not as a mental illness, but as a legitimate and personal experience that some people go through.

I’ve used the label trans-exclusionary radical feminist before because I do believe biological women should have their own spaces and I don’t think trans women should compete in women’s sports. But at the same time, I feel uncomfortable with how quick TERFs are to dismiss TIRFs or even people like me who just want to ask questions. They’re often called libfems or even misogynists, which feels overly hostile.

So my question is, why do trans exclusionary radical feminists think the way they do? And why is there such a strong rejection of nuance, especially when it comes to transsexuals?

Before I answer, know that I am not taking this from any actual speech, literature, etc. because quite frankly all my radfem exposure comes from tumblr. But for the record, I study social science and I’ve written multiple A-level essays relating to this subject.

My answer to your question is that there is not just one answer.

There are some of them who are just transphobes hiding behind the term “feminist”. This goes for any of them who just ignores actual data, rage baits, enforce that women are just their bodies or biological functions, and similar things. In some situation it’s even just straight anti feminist. This is also the reason I usually ignore any terf that interacts with my tirf content, because it’s like arguing with a pro russia bot on TikTok.

There is also the fear and fear mongering, I believe. If we believe everyone that’s AMAB is inherently evil and there is nothing we can do to change society (which is false if we look at history), and being a woman is defined by experiencing abuse and misogyny, it will create hate for anyone with a penis. It is true that in a lot of places in the world, being a woman is the last thing you’d wanna be. But instead of targeting trans women, who in there countries are probably equally as hated, we need to demount those cultures and values that oppress women.

Like you mentioned, I too agree with some things that are usually seen as TERF ideology. That lesbians should be allowed to choose wether they only wanna date women who have vaginas, for example. But there’s a point when it’s not about that, and instead using inherently anti-trans dialogue. I also thing feminism should be about the liberation of women, not transgender people. But trans women are women in their right, and in discussions like these it’s good to bring it up. A lot of TERFs complain about trans women, and then go on about how radfems talk so much about trans women instead of cis women. Like check yourself, maybe?

But I am gender critical, if that’s the right term for this discussion. You can’t choose wether to be born with a penis or vagina, or both if you’re intersex. Gender identity on the other hand, is much more vibrant. There are historical records of trans and non-binary people, thousands of years ago. To think all trans women are just men dressing as women because of a fetish is desinformation and transphobic.

If people like TERFs continue to make femininity to be a certain thing or experience, it will just end up excluding and targeting cis women in the end. See how Imane Khelif was treated in the Olympics because she was considered looking too masculine. Plus the fact that saying “real women have boobs” “real women have cycles” is exclusionary to for example cis women who have had their breasts removed surgically due to cancer, women who don’t get their cycles due to medical conditions, etc. This, along with the usually blatant disregard for actual facts and data, is the reason I usually see those TERFs as conservatives calling themselves feminists.

The point is, a lot of TERFs aren’t actually gender abolitionists. Many of them believe there are things that make you a woman, things that make you a man and nothing in between. Of course you can’t change what you were born as or your chromosomes. But modern culture and expression is. True gender abolitionism in my eyes is denying femininity and masculinity as concepts altogether, and any gender roles tied to them.

[trothplighted]

I saw a series of tags on another post that contained a derisive comment about “(current or former) HP fans who refuse to see that the books share the views of the author” (paraphrased, because I don’t want to call out one specific person), and I guess I wanted to talk about it, because… yes and no

in an earlier post I talked about how I don’t trust JKR’s ability to accurately identify good and evil, and how I work around her thumb on the scale when it comes to how I’m supposed to think of a character (so, for example, every good character suddenly deciding Sirius is a bad and dangerous person for Harry to be around in OotP is not an indication that this is true, it’s because they’re homophobic either implicitly or explicitly or if they’re gay they’re being influenced by a homophobic society to judge him more intensely. another example would be James’s bullying - I make the conscious choice to integrate both his early characterization as a good and principled and noble and morally sound person and his tendency for violence, and I look at the normalized culture of violence at Hogwarts and the pranks that good characters play and the dismissal of harassment or abuse or stalking from teachers and the administration, and I examine the accuracy and limitations of Pensieve memories and how the Worst Memory differs from others we’ve seen, and I ask myself about Snape’s motivations in the moment and his cultural background and personal prejudices, and somewhere in all of that is the truth about how bad James was objectively + how bad James was in the context of Wizarding Britain school culture. those things are two different things) and I guess I’m mostly annoyed that there’s a lot of people on this site who seem to think that no one who likes these books has ever been critical of Joanne, that no one who spends time in this world is unaware of how fucked up it is, etc.

and yet her path to radicalization is well-documented! we know when she pivoted to TERFdom. we can see her early attempts to diversify HP and make it more global and try and appeal to a progressive crowd in the early/mid 2010s to stay relevant, and we can see how after the progressive part of fandom pretty firmly rejected and mocked her (for both valid AND invalid reasons; I do think that there were a lot of trolls and assholes in between the real serious criticism) she went running to the right wing for validation and support, and they sucked her in. she’s a largely-failed author whose non-HP books do not manage to live up to HP’s legacy, and who will be forever associated with this project that ended 18 years ago, and she’s been desperate to remain relevant rather than content to rest on her laurels. (Or to write again intermittently when inspiration strikes, like Suzanne Collins has done)

so - there IS a lot of fucked up stuff in the books, ideologically, in how the characters act. it’s just stuff that was fucked up before she turned into a TERF, and as a result it’s a lot less obviously evil and more ideologically thorny. ignoring her declarations of who is or isn’t Good will reveal a whole cast of morally grey people trying to figure out what the right moves are, and living in a horribly fucked up world that nonetheless deserves to be saved. and I think that seeing her flaws as they are preserved in ink and paper, and arguing against them, and finding reasons to oppose them - this is the backbone of the more analytical parts of what’s left of the fandom.

(I’d argue going further to interpret her prejudices against “Evil” characters Watsonianly as in-universe prejudices against deviation from the norm has brought me to an observation of a sort of four-sided debate on the subject of how to run the world (authoritarian right/Voldemort, authoritarian left/Grindelwald, libertarian-ish right/the Ministry, libertarian-ish left/Dumbledore) where all sides kind of have at least a few good points and the real measure of how bad a movement or system is is “how many real people are helped or hurt by this? how protected are vulnerable innocents?”) but that’s the subject of another post. I’ll spread the “the greatest evil is fascism” agenda elsewhere.)

In an ideal world, HP would have faded into relative obscurity fairly quickly. The books were never perfect but the engagement with those flaws has been ongoing forever; there’s much less hero-worship of Joanne in serious fan spaces than in casual ones, and her issues are ones we’ve been wrestling with for decades. but they weren’t TERFery, and I think that’s important to remember, because we can criticize her for things that she’s done wrong 18 years ago and 22 years ago and not have to bend over backwards excoriating ourselves because she metamorphosed into something worse than she already was. she’s a writer. no more, no less. and she’s one of many who’ve written some great art with some horrible bigotries underneath. I don’t apologize for liking Shakespeare, and he’s a way better writer who was much more explicit in his prejudices than she was in 2003 or 1998 or 2007. The woman who exists now grew out of the woman who wrote all this, frustratingly so, but they aren’t identical.

[radicalcoffeeclub]

i have been feeling really caught between worlds lately as a trans person who believes sex based oppression is the basis for misogyny, and i wanted to say it was a relief to find your blog and see there are still feminists who respect my identity/dysphoria while also not denying the material reality of female subjugation.

i think your stance is perfectly reasonable and hold many of the same opinions. youd be surprised how many trans people actually agree with feminist thought in private. i think more of us agree with feminist thought than are willing to admit to ourselves, but bc of this tribalist sort of culture we have built up where associating with The Other Side is grounds for permanent ostracism, a lot of us just keep quiet and try not to think about it. it's been getting worse as well with the culture war- it is far easier to behave reactively and blame some woman with a blog for our dwindling rights than to face the overwhelming reality of how much power a few wealthy men hold over all our lives.

i have hope though that feminism will gain ground in our spaces again, and i do my best to try to bring more feminism into my own spaces. sorry this got long, i was just so relieved to see someone talking sense and wanted to let you know your words and respect aren't wasted. i do not think you are an "evil terf" who hates us.

Thanks for sending this, this is such a nice message! I agree it sucks that there is such a big division between people and ideas right now that it seems impossible to find common ground when there would actually be quite a bit of it. I feel like it wasn't even that long ago when it was generally acceptable to hold both the beliefs that biological sex is immutable and it matters as well as that some people are trans and that it isn't very hard to accept that. I don't need to rub it in a trans person's face that I think of gender entirely differently from them. I don't need to argue with my nonbinary friends that they're women. Just like I don't need to argue with every religious person I know that their god isn't real. I don't need to call people by a name they don't want to be called just because "that's your real name". I too ask people to call me by my nickname instead of the name my parents gave me. As with religious people, I only take issue when they start imposing their beliefs on me or saying that I'm not allowed to do or say something because of their beliefs.

Personally, the things that have pushed me towards radical feminism regarding trans issues have been 1) the increasingly pervasive claim that biological sex isn't real and doesn't matter, 2) the push for laws that essentially harm women's rights and 3) the push to allow medical transition for children (which will among other things make them unable to experience sexual pleasure and idk why any trans activist would even want that for other trans people). I agree this has become a culture war of sorts where both views get further and further. I don't really agree with quite a few takes I see on radblr. I don't agree with mocking or taunting trans people just because we disagree. I think too many radfems are making fools of themselves and radical feminism by acting like bullies. Some will justify it with "well tras post this and that and thats worse" but like, just don't engage with that shit. It's not necessary. All it does is further inflame this shit and reinforce an us vs them mentality. No I don't think we need to be nice and shut up uwu but everyone should consider whether what they're saying is constructive or destructive.

It's interesting to read that you think many trans people/trans activists agree with (radical) feminist points but wouldn't admit that because there's such a big division and people fear getting ostracised. It's a big issue that the discussion has become such walking on eggshells and anyone with a different view can quickly be labelled a terf and discarded. There's a lot at stake when possibly your entire social and friend group could dump you for being seen as a transphobe - even for expressing lukewarm takes that wouldn't have shocked anyone 15 years ago.

Again thanks for this message! Good food for thought. And good for you for trying to make the discussion more nuanced in your circles! We need more of that everywhere. You're not alone.

[wolfertinger]

warning for mentions of rape i guess, sorry i got a bit heated here but im genuinely baffled at how people could side with these two after this.

when salem defended wis (who was quite literally berating someone for asking clarification on if she was being exclusionary of other trans peoples' experiences in favor of transfems) by saying he agrees with her as a trans man really fuckin pisses me off as a transmasc person. you dont get to speak on behalf of all trans men and transmasc people. stop fucking acting like youre our leader or something.

mind you, wis replied to this person with, quote, "yes trans people as a whole experience this problem, yes trans women have it the worst out of everyone". everyone.

trans people have it really difficult in life.

trans women have it really difficult in life.

trans men have it really difficult in life.

non-binary people have it really difficult in life.

genderqueer people have it really difficult in life.

trans people have it really difficult in life.

i dont give a fuck if you think X Y and Z suddenly makes being a trans woman much more difficult than literally every other queer identity under the sun, thats not how it fucking works man. queer experiences are not a god damn monolith, everyone goes through life differently, and yes you can argue certain identities get discriminated against in unique ways- THAT IS NOT GROUNDS TO SAY YOURE THE MOST OPPRESSED.

in this day and age you will be systematically oppressed for being trans no matter what label you use, because you're trans. nobody should give a shit about who's got it worse because WE ALL HAVE IT SHITTY. THAT SHOULD BE THE END OF IT.

salem even argues that trans men widely experiencing erasure in media is a good thing and thus is part of why trans women somehow have it harder by default. what the actual fuck????

"you never hear about transphobia in shows, news, games etc specifically targeting transmasc/afab people individually because society views us as "tricked women" no matter what so ofc they're not going to paint us as super evil and aggressive"

1: ah yes, being infantilized and completely ignored is MUCH better than being treated as violent, guys. being brushed off by your doctor/psychiatrist/parents/etc because you're just a confused little girl and should keep those disgusting thoughts to yourself is sooo much better and doesn't make you feel utterly alone and wanting to end your fucking life.

2: this also isnt fucking true anyways, i see trans men get targeted ALL THE TIME with shit like "they're ruining their natural beauty and just need a man to fix them" yknow, leading to rape, or being "violent traitors" which is especially common in TERF circles, spouting bs about how testosterone turns you violent/ugly/brutish... oh hey, doesn't that sound familiar?

and lets not forget wis, at one point, replying to that person with "type in the chat 1 if you feel unsafe around me, 2 if you feel unsafe around (person she was replying to)" essentially getting her followers to rally against someone THAT LITERALLY JUST ASKED FOR CLARIFICATION ON WHAT SHE MEANT.

and for the record, wis: 1.

i just do not understand, why terminally online queer people like wis and salem, are so intent on making a "hierarchy" of queerness. like yes. trans women, do have it bad. transmisogyny is a unique and terrible thing to experience. but, the way the both of them talk about trans men. and honestly. the way a large portion of the internet, talks about trans men/trans mascs. it gets truly bad. even, from other queer people.

in an irl, lgbt community. guess what. nobody cares, about your ASAB. no one walks up, and asks, "are you TME or TMA?!?!". no one pries into your identity. if you look 100% feminine. but ask them to refer to you as a he. they will respect this. salem of course, does not know this, as he has never attempted to seek an lgbt community. and yes. i am aware, he lives in the south, in a religious environment. so did i. in the deep south, where at times, it was dangerous.

i have been incredibly fortunate, in that i have been part of many different real life lgbt communities. some created by myself even, and thus, having experience with irl, chill queer people. they literally, are just people. and yes. some of them, DO end up being bad people, they are not immune to being shitty, simply for being lgbt. our group, rightfully kept them away, because they proved themselves to be a danger, and could not respect basic consent.

the point of a community, especially one for marginalized people. is to BE. TOGETHER. to SUPPORT, and UPLIFT one another! not to create, artificial lines, that no one cares about, irl. wis and salem so desperately, want to be the queen and king of a shitty hierarchy, they are constructing around them, where they always have the be-all-end-all, to everything, and every issue, and are never wrong. i think, as someone who is not terminally online, and has more experience with irl gays, than online gays, it is just scummy.

[rosencatholic]

Maxdibert was once good, now she is on a downhill slope. When I said in an anon that liking JK or not, you got to agree that Lily Tino - the person that talks about their genitals around children on Disney (because even trans activists are against Lily Tino - anyone with a brain is against that creep) and that trans should gatekeep their community better (because is full of creeps they keep protecting, even so far as saying that not using your transwoman-rapist's she/her pronouns makes you bad because you wouldn’t do the same to a "cis" one) she said I was a TERF and that "dead terf in fertilizer for my garden" in the same post she says she was raised right because she is against terf.

And I went... WHAT?

How is wishing for someone’s death because of their opinions a thing people "raised right" do?

Then, to take that apple out of my troat out I argued about how can someone support that creep and even sent links about men using the disguise of trans (like that dude that after graping 2 woman, claimed to be trans to be sent to the womans prison - the place his preferred victims are) and how can she claim that man won’t protect woman anymore in the same breath she says man in dresses should be protected from the evil terfs opnions, we must protect their precious feelings (because that is certainly more important that woman's physical health from the creeps that use the trans umbrella of infinite protection to get into woman's only safe spaces and harm them) and she ignored everything and went on a tirade about how just because of some bad people doesn't mean that trans shouldn't exist (neither me nor JK said that) and that man hurt woman way more than transwoman do, and blah blah blah. Like we fearing the bad ones is a bad thing (and we can’t know who are the bad ones because they like to protect the monsters to their grave), like that old man that claimed to be a little girl in Canada to compete in a swimming competition against little girls - of course they had to share a locker room or it would transphobic - no, we should totally open our arms to all of them when any one can be anything nowdays, let them with our children, like they are all saints and can do no wrong.

She also said the bad examples are just few and a way JK uses to her evil terf agenda. This is coming from someone that claims to be smart, a lawyer - but can't see the underlying context that if there are bad apples, that they always protect - Lily Tino was the first, that I know, that they went against and that took forever - how can they expect us to trust all of them? To lower our heads and accept when they invent some new shit everyday (for example: slug/slugs are pronouns some of these people use), because they are all-knowing overlords and are always right - detransitioners, who? Chloe Cole, who? - Jeffrey Marsh wants to talk with your children online without you there, activists say: let him, what an icon! Alok said little girls are kinky! Dylan Mulvaney says a woman can have a bulge and we should ignore it! They protect MONSTERS that sing for our blood on the floor and clowns making fun of woman and we are the bad guys for being afraid and angry?

Hello Anon!

I agree that Lily Tino is a creep and that he (I don't respect that "woman") needs to be banned from women's spaces, but oh my goodness I didn't know it was THAT bad. The pro-trans community will defend anyone and everything, even to the detriment of real women. As if being called a TERF is insulting, like no that's an honor at this point in time. Though I am sorry she said that gross line.

Truly, they screech about peace, justice, and love, but then have no qualms with basically saying that anyone that doesn't agree with them are better off dead. Yikes.

They have a certain disconnect between people not agreeing with them and thinking that the same people wish them dead. Absolutely no one thinks that they should be dead or killed because they're trans. Like no. That's a human being and they deserve the right to live, but that does not mean that they should freak out on people who do not share the same beliefs as them. It's bonkers that they've convinced themselves that people like JKR want them dead or see her as the most evil of evil, like honey I'm sure there are worse things out there than a woman who stands up for real women.

We do not have to bend true reality just to smooth their hurt feelings when we tell them that men cannot be women and women cannot be men or all that other crazy stuff they've been shouting about for the past decade is not the opinion the general population holds.

Some people who claim to be smart and studied may be book smart, yet they do not hold true wisdom in real life.

There's no reasoning with them, no matter how logical your arguments may be or how plentiful and convincing your examples and proof may be. Best to let them be in their echo chamber (that's why I don't argue with people on this site about this because I just know they're not going to change their minds and it's a waste of energy and time).

Perhaps one day in their old age they will realize how foolish they behaved for the sake of mentally ill men playing dress up who all of a sudden want to force their way into women's spaces.

[50sfemme]

3 trans women have been murdered in the US in less than two weeks. i hold you and all other terfs personally responsible. fuck you. that 14 year okd girl's blood is on your hands. how the fuck do you sleep at night?

you can hold me accountable if you wish, but you must face the truth that the murders of trans people are all at the hands of men. homophobic, transphobic men. as a feminist, i am against the associations of femininity with femaleness and masculinity with maleness, which is why i refuse to accept that a man in a dress becomes more of a woman for doing so, or that a woman is more of a man if she cuts her hair short. by arguing for the modern notion of gender, one inevitably ends up perpetuating conservative gender roles, even if this is done under the guise of progressivism. on my tumblr, all i have done is point this out, and i will keep pointing it out. i have no hatred for trans people, nor do i wish to see them harmed.

why do you not leave anonymous asks on the blogs of transphobic men? why do you not attack men, the sole people who murder trans women, why do your protest slogans not state that men are evil, that men should die? why is your activism always about harassing women who have never harmed anybody? i am lesbian woman, not the enemy, nor the enactor of harm. please direct your hatred elsewhere. saying that a fourteen year old’s blood is on my hands is an incredibly vile thing to say and i hope you can sleep at night, knowing you torment and harass women on the internet instead of your actual oppressors.

[d-parade]

please don’t be like this

useless warning mentions of violence

my original post for context (not at all vicious or rude, just me reacting mildly to a violent comment and explaining):

here are some comments she made. she blocked me, of course, not even giving me the time to respond before blocking to make it look like she has the upper hand. but luckily i have another tumblr account.

she’s not even a trans woman… if you were a trans man before that means you were female. how is it in any way transmisogyny if you’re not a trans woman?

and… we skipped right past transphobia and straight to transmisogyny? whew what a leap.

oh and there’s other comments too. she combed through my account. lucky.

ohhhh so we misgendering now? kinda hypocritical and ironic how you believe in a mindset of respecting everyone’s “identities” until it’s someone who you don’t agree with.

at least transmedicalists misgender because of how they define dysphoria. it’s not like they purposefully want to misgender (when they don’t even see them as trans in the first place) (like if it’s a binary tucute with dysphoria they use proper pronouns). not the same for tucutes apparently. they just do it because they believe they’re the good guys and misgendering is an act of justice against evil…

and funny enough this was my post directly below the one she commented on… which sums up my experience with her nicely. i’m sure she read it too.

i’m not saying this person represents all tucutes and inclusionists of course. like i said in the above pic, there’s genuinely nice people who come from a place of love. i just don’t agree with how their ideas work.

all in all, no matter who you are, what you are, do not respond with violence. and it’s not because i’m triggered or disturbed by it or anything. it’s just straight up immature. you’re also not at all open to discussion or even try to counter argue my points, just straight up “TERF RHETORIC” “TRANSMISOGNY” “KILL YOURSELF”

do you not find it embarrassing?

this is a reminder that your actions determine how someone else perceives the communities you’re in. while it’s impossible to control other’s perception of an entire community, change starts with you. just be a respectful person. no matter how much you hate the other party, maintain dignity. by doing that, you already won the war.

it’s not so much about “being a person you want others to respect”, but more of self respect. don’t ever reduce yourself to plain, mindless hate.

it’s not that hard. so just please don’t do this. you’re only hurting yourself, and the ideologies you represent.

[phoenix-hyperspace]

this person is a TERF in the DID community.

[image ID: a cut-off screenshot of a post from tumblr user finding-the-feminine. it reads as follows;

This post is less for detransitioners, and more for people with DID who are transitioning or considering transitioning

Please listen to your alters!

If you are a trans host, but most of your system does not want to go through a medical transition, please listen to them. If you're a host in a system where 90% of your alters are not the sex you're transitioning to, consider your alters when making your decision.

end ID]

do not follow, interact with or give this person any attention. they are a radfem openly reblogging from radfems and TERFs, and much of their posting is deeply rooted in gender essentialism/bioessentialism and other forms of regurgitated TERF/radfem talking points. it does not matter if what they're saying is true or not, the things that radfems say are not about truth, but about roping you into their belief systems as sneakily as possible in some form or another. do not fall for it.

this person and everyone like them does not want you to genuinely consider the feelings of your alters when considering transitioning, they want to scare you away from transitioning entirely. that is the whole point of TERF circles and blogs like this one.

there are a number of women in the DID community that have been abused by men and got deeply sucked into TERF and radfem circles to cope with their trauma, because it's easier to believe that all men are ontologically evil rather than understanding that men who abuse get away with their abuse because of the patriarchy putting them into power, not because all men are evil, and that women can be and are just as complicit and able to get away with their abuse because the patriarchy paints them as inherently 'safe'.

inb4 some TERF comes to me about some bullshit, know that you are speaking to someone who has been sexually abused by women and girls completely unrelated to men. fuck you.

there is nothing special about femininity/femaleness that makes it 'better' or 'safer' in some form. believing this gets. you. trapped. it will leave you gaslit and abused in all manners. these people will not help you recover from your trauma or make you safe. these people will not help male survivors of abuse. these people want to take your trauma as a woman or person AFAB and turn it into a 'natural' part of 'womanhood' instead of actually fighting the patriarchy and the sexual abuse of children.

these people want you to resign yourself to a world where women are inherent victims of the patriarchy, because they believe men cannot be redeemed. they do not want to help you, they do not want to help the world, they want to pull you and as many other people as possible down like crabs in a bucket because they cannot envision a better world.

when someone starts talking about womanhood inherently coming with trauma, when someone starts talking about the divine feminine, when someone starts seeming as if they're trying to discourage you from transitioning, when they subscribe to the idea of all women being part of this 'sisterhood', when they believe that sexuality and porn can only ever be for the male gaze, when their ideas of femininity are only ever chaste and beautiful, when they create this idea that sapphic/lesbian relationships are somehow 'pure' or 'chaste', when they spout ideas that women could never touch manhood and that men can never touch womanhood, when their ideas of womanhood only ever include white women and white ideals of femininity--you are looking at the beliefs of a radfem, and you need to get the fuck out of dodge.

know the signs, don't let them pull you in. this will not heal you.

block this person and everyone else like them, and move on. do not give them a platform by arguing with them, because you cannot change their mind and risk exposing their ideas to other people every time you reblog argue. don't do it.

[cupcraft]

Also its funny (and by funny I just mean baffling) that whenever I stumble across a terf blog to see what their arguing about it just surprises me how little terfs actually critique the patriarchy and misogyny at large which again always reinforces my point baout how radfems/terfs really are just parrots of the system and players in reinforcing it.

Terfs will really blame anything that isn't the patriarchy (most trans people and trans women especially). They blame things that the patriarchy also blames. They parrot conservative evangelical christian reproductive arguments, they parrot racism and white supremacy leading to colonialism and bioessentialism arguments which is also linked to eugenics and anti-disability rhetoric, they subjugate themselves to the patriarchy with said arguments (ie women are weaker than men, women are dumber than men, etc. <- basically what you see a lot when they discuss trans women in sports). They support laws that empower fascism and police states, that rid themselves of bodily autonomy and freedom. They critique labor exploitation in the sex work and porn industry by victim blaming the worker and not the system and at the same time they dont see other work as exploitative/under the same system. They reinforce capitalism as Women must be Working and Girlboss in Capitalism and Homemakers are Evil without supporting liberation or intersecting their arguments again with other axes of oppression and understanding how capitalism as a system really again is the arm of the patriarchy and oppressors.

Its just always so tiring and baffling to see how far terfs are willing to go to side with oppressors as if it'll save them. Idk if this makes much sense as im just rambling but yeah

[zevranunderstander]

whenever i get a terf on my blog i read their blog and their mutuals' blogs before blocking all of them, like, mostly because i'm a hater, but also because i find it kind of interesting why certain people think certain bigoted things, and terfs are so fascinating to me because they live in this echo chamber that makes them forget how reality works and operates on a larger scale. like they have this small bubble and only ever talk to other terfs, and they feel like they are the only people alive talking about feminism and lesbian rights? and people attacking them thus are always attacking *women* like, the person attacking them is always assumed to be trans or a man, and so the other person is always by definition incorrect and hateful and evil.

like for them, they are this small in-group of the last sane and rational people working against some ubiquitous evil that is trying to eradicate them and get them to "like men" or whatever and they don't really understand the criticism that misandry isn't helping feminism because we are just alienating everyone and that their views on how men in general act are completely unreasonable and theyre so insanely obsessed with this idea that men are inherently evil and manipulative, but even when normal regular feminists try to criticise them, they think all other women are "complicit" in trying to make men the superior overlords of the world and whatnot

and obviously since to them women are these magical, spiritual creatures with divine powers and men are born evil, they think gender is inherently binary, and trans men to them are women who bow a knee to masculinity and trans women are inherently evil men trying to get into the only safe space women have left out of malice. and they do this thing where they only ever view the most fringe opinions that some people hold and try to paint them as these universal talking points they are arguing against. "some people regret having a gender reaffirming surgery" becomes "gender reassignment surgery is predatory, and deeply harmful and ruin your life and basically everyone who ever did it regrets it (because to them, like i said, transness isn't "real"), and "after being really nasty about trans people, a terf got hate mail" becomes "all trans people want to violently assault and murder us and people are cheering them on", and "one trans person somewhere said something that's actually kind of troubling and weird" becomes "all trans people are a monolith and they all think exactly what this one person said"

and like, they are acting exactly like this one genre of racist white people who think that one black person somewhere voicing that they, personally, hate all white people, and feel immediately incredibly threatened and claim that this is proof that "reverse racism" exists, but instead, terfs are convinced that a tiny sexual minority which is constantly being pushed down and ridiculed and questioned for their sanity and has their rights stripped and who gets murdered in hate crimes is somehow *their* oppressor

and its easy to say stuff like "i hate terfs" and whatnot, and they will continue to view this as an attack on womanhood and not as the same thing as someone saying "i hate racists", because they think their hateful ideology and gender essentialism are some inherent facts about the world, but like. genuinely, if you're a terf, or whatever you call yourself, you need to understand that you are not the oppressed group. you are ridiculing a minority that already has it worse enough, and you think you are doing this to liberate women, but I need you to understand that women and men are not innately and uncompromisingly different, and a lot of women who cling to movements like this probably actually had a pretty bad experience with a man, and the patriarchy and the oppression and sexual exploitation of women are real concerns, but you are projecting a social dynamic that makes men more likely to be violent oppressors out to be something that is in a gender's nature, when that is just clearly not the case and such a deeply reductive lens to view people through

[thorne1435]

Just dropping by to say your replies to transphobes/kinkshamers on comments are queen shit. "Cool Harbinger of Critical Thinking Apocalypse shit" if you prefer something more gender neutral. Keep slaying! We need more people who actually use their education for good and can hold a debate and call out fallacies in Terfs thinking for those of us with hypersensitivity/lack of education/thinking impediment due to medications and disabilities who struggle with that. Thank you internet good fairy :)!

!!!

Thank you! At least somebody else enjoys the strange desire I have to argue with people who will never agree with me!

Though, I think I should come into a compliment like this with a bit of temperance. I always feel like it's a human obligation to argue with people who you disagree with, not because you want to hassle them, but because if you truly believe you're correct then you should also believe that they're getting their facts mixed up somewhere or that they're lacking information or that they've been mislead. I've always believed we should correct misinformation wherever it is, immediately and efficiently, even when I had horrible right-wing political beliefs. And as someone who used to have those right-wing political beliefs, I can't pass up the opportunity to reach out to someone who maybe just needs to hear the facts laid out properly, like I did.

A lot of people forget that Nazis and "RadFems" and such are not actually just evil. They tend to be lashing out because of pain and trauma or a perceived injustice in the world, or...they just got told that they needed to hate something when they were vulnerable or susceptible to that kind of information. They don't need to be dunked on (even if it is kinda fun), they need to be provided the information they're missing.

Anyway, the points that I use I generally don't come up with on my own. I just consume a lot of left-leaning political content and kinda...compile it? Or like, absorb it, into my argumentative personality. (Though, my sociology classes are giving me new statistics to pop off with so...stay tuned? I guess??)

[furryprovocateur]

So if I, a closeted trans man, get cat called, sexually assaulted, called demeaning female based names, simply because I secretly identify as a man I didn't just expirence misogyny? Because I'm a man? Even though all those people perceived me as a woman and treated me like such? Just tying to work my way through your weird gatekeeping of the word "misogyny". If you're perceived as a woman and attacked as such I believe that's expirenceing "misogyny" regardless of what gender you identify as. Because it's rooted in the hate of woman, so anyone who can be perceived as a woman can expirence that hate. That make sense?

oh my god since i still am getting anons about this i am going to clarify my stance so that way we can put this to bed <- knows that this will likely never stop

when i said "trans men do not experience misogyny", what i was saying is that trans men are not women therefore when they experience anything misogynist, it is rooted in the hate of women, not in the hate of them specifically. so when a man does something misogynist to a trans man, it's still oppressive (I HAVE NEVER DENIED THIS), it is still something that is harming them (I HAVE NEVER DENIED THIS), it just is rooted in misogyny, which trans men are not the targeted recipient of. anything related to statements calling trans men women or otherwise intentionally misgendering falls under transphobia rather than misogyny.

the common referent people use to argue the opposite is "trans men still have to navigate planned parenthood, obgyns, etc. and restricting access to that is being affected by misogyny". i do think that restricting access to abortion or birth control or anything along those lines is evil and rooted in misogyny, and i'm not denying that trans men obviously get affected by this. i just do not think this suddenly means that trans men are women who are affected by misogyny because they happen to be caught in the crossfire of misogyny. i could give you a thousand and twelve examples of how cis men can potentially be caught in a situation where misogyny has impacted them in a negative way. that does not suddenly mean cis men experience misogyny, in my opinion.

"because it's rooted in the hate of woman, so anyone who can be perceived as a woman can experience that hate" is a statement i do not agree with. i feel like this is a very online topic (that again, i largely regret even tossing my hat into the ring because the lion's share of takes have agreed with me up to a point and the point where we disagree is truly not worth this level of debate imo!) because ultimately these negative things occur and we're splitting hairs over what to call it. i think it's more important to identify what the axis of oppression/bigotry is and identify the ways in which it's proliferated than to worry about whether or not someone experiences it. do i really care if we call a cishet man being fagbashed a victim of homophobia or not? not really, i'd rather we focus more of our energy on something more productive. again, it is my mistake for even opening this bag of worms because i didn't realize (at 3 am when i made the initial reblog) how unnecessarily divisive this would be when we all agree on fundamentally the same points (trans men experience oppression, this oppression is bad).

please read this in the most generous tone you can. keep in mind: if you disagree, that's fine, i'm not going to like, get really mad and have cartoon levels of steam blow out my ears. i am not trying to belittle or demean trans men, i am (very obviously) not a terf, and i would greatly appreciate it if we all, as adults, agreed (or agreed to disagree) and moved on.

[queenies-thoughts]

Hello all! welcome to my sideblog! Here's my introduction post in easily digestible bullet point form. read to the end for a treat 🐌

Name: Queenie

Pronouns: she/her

Any other personal information: irrelevant

My personal privacy on the internet is my utmost priority, so any personal questions will be deleted, and repeat offenders will be blocked, no mercy.

Blog purpose: to store all my weirdest, innermost, and most private thoughts

Why don't I just use my main: my main is now followed by people I know in real life, and sometimes I don't want them to see my deepest darkest secrets. that's what tumblr's for, no?

In essence this blog is for horny posting and writing rants

FAQ: no one asks me any questions

That's the basics, more info under the read more

If you have more questions about me as a person that aren't privacy invading, ask away! I will be the judge of whether I want to answer it.

Tagging system so I don't forget:

#my thoughts : my original posts

#additions : adding onto other posts, including rambling in the tags

#evil : me when I think I'm being overdramatic

#sideblog behavior : fandom rants that belong in the fandom sideblog but I put them here anyways cause who give a shit

#horny on main : for posting horny on main

#tw [dead dove] : that's how I'll post my trigger warnings, lmk if I need to change or update the trigger warnings of a post

#fandom : most of my fandom stuff will go to my fandom blog (undisclosed) but if I don't feel like tagging it as specifically for that blog or if I would rather it go here for whatever reason, I'll tag it with this

this is the only blog I have a pre planned tagging system for, so I may be a little loosey goosey

Things that will get you blocked:

Terf, radfem, etc.

Nazis

Being an asshole (low tolerance for this)

actually being an asshole covers pretty much everything

I already mentioned this but violating my privacy policy is a big no no, and even though I said second offenders get blocked, first offenders can get blocked too if I think it's bad enough.

I won't engage or argue (probably), I will just block you. When I'm on tumblr, I usually don't have the energy for that amout of discussion anyways. If I did, I would be using it for something more constructive, like rambling to my friends about something. Maybe instead of being hateful, you should try talking about Doctor Who instead, that usually gets me in a better mood.

If you think you know what my main is, no you don't, and please don't tell me. That would be annoying, as either it would be useless and I would do nothing about it, or I would have to, like, make a whole new blog or something, idk.

If you've gotten this far, thanks! You're awesome and have amazing patience! As a reward, here's a fun hat and a mushroom I found in my dad's yard last year.

bonus photo of another of the same mushroom with a slug, for those that would appreciate it

Thanks! also if anyone can confidently tell me what kind of mushroom that is, that would be greatly appreciated. 🫶

[pineapplerightsideupcake]

i find that "zionist" has the same connotation as "terf", anytime you disagree with one's narrative about their strongly held beliefs they insult you. then use buzzwords to try to get you riled up--colonialism, settler, etc or "trans people need to pee", etc, making your point either look evil or stupid.

i'm actually impressed with the way these people manage to shut down discourse, "i'm not arguing bc so and so is a suspected terf/zionist!" or "i'm not reading that a zionist/terf wrote it!"

engaging with one's arguments by insulting them and shutting them down is cowardly at best, and immoral at worse.

It also only works on certain people some of the time. Most people aren’t terminally online faux leftists with zero understanding of history or science or any other topic that isn’t TikTok trends and 200 words tumblr posts.

[slicedcheesegremlin]

You’re honestly making it out to be that trans is all about tricking other people. If that’s what it’s about then fine, but that just makes you look entitled, uninterested in true consent, and inconsiderate of potential partners. You guys cannot replace sexual orientation with “gender” which comes down to either tricking the eye and going stealth, or going against your sexual orientation in order to accept anyone who demands acceptance? Sorry but that’s not a great ethic whatsoever.

at no point did I argue that being trans is about tricking people? Who the fuck would want to bring a partner to their bed without letting them know what kind of genitals they have and that the partner is ok with it, that's insane. The whole concept of the TERF bar from the post was that every trans person there would be trying to decieve a CIS lesbian into having sex with them because they were actually some kind of evil man, as opposed to being in the bar for normal reasons like every other lesbian there, i.e. trying to find a partner who is comfortable with them while escaping the gaze it cis men that fetishize them. Nobody is going "SURPRISE, I HAVE A PENIS! NOW YOU CAN NEVER ESCAPE!"