#tf even is a statistical question

[emiwuaidmslomc]

OMG IM BELOW THE FUCKING WORD COUNT WE FUCKING CHEERED

[eatyoursparkout]

hello! this ask is prompted by a recent reblog of yours about rubber preservation. I'd love to hear your thoughts relating to TFs and preservation and plastics. what should folks know? any best practices for storage? do you think there's another way manufacturers could produce them to make them more hardy? etc etc. thanks :)

Sure! I'm not a conservator by trade (and even within conservation plastics are still somewhat of a new and niche thing), but I can offer some general advice.

The tl;dr is that like 90% of other materials your best bet is to keep them clean, out of strong light, in an environment that isn't too hot or too cold, and to avoid temperature/relative humidity (RH) fluctuations as much as possible. And above all, make sure that they're well-ventilated.

The tl;dr tl;dr is that plastics just suck.

More detail under the cut! (...Lots of detail. Sorry.)

There's 2 main problems with plastics.

The first is that a lot of them are just kind of inherently unstable. Unlike a nice chemically stable material like glass, they want to deteriorate when exposed to things like....oxygen. Rip. And once damage has set in, it's basically impossible to reverse/treat.

The second is that there's really no regulations or standards when it comes to the manufacture of plastics. There's a bazillion different types, and even if you're able to identify the specific kind via chemical test (and this often damages the object in question) it's almost impossible to know what other kinds of additives went into the plastic soup that created the thing in front of you. This also makes it really hard to develop a standardized approach to caring for and treating plastics, because two things can react wildly differently even if they appear virtually the same.

That means that when it comes to plastics, preventative conservation is the name of the game. You want to mitigate the effects of the agents of deterioration on the object as much as possible. And in the meantime, make peace with the fact that nothing can be preserved indefinitely :')

TFwiki has an article talking about the common types of plastic used in TF figures, which is neat and useful. Gonna hazard a guess that most figures are predominantly ABS, which is great because it's a fairly sturdy hard plastic that probably won't show effects for a while. I'd be statistically more concerned about figures with squishy, rubbery bits (looking with apprehension at my Kingdom line BW figures).

So! While the ideal environment for plastics is cold, dark, dry and oxygen-free (lol), when it comes to personal collections you can obviously only take reasonable measures. They're in our homes, not a vault. The main things you want to keep in mind:

Light fades and discolours plastic over time, and can eventually cause certain kinds to become brittle. The more lux that your figures are exposed to, the faster that's going to happen. So while it's not reasonable for your house to maintain museum-level lighting or shell out for fancy UV filtered cases, I'd keep your displays out of direct sunlight at minimum.

High temperatures can increase the rate of oxidation, and low ones can encourage shrinkage and brittleness. Either one can do damage over time, but what's worse is fluctuations in temp that force the material to weather one extreme to the other. If you've got your figures in a storage unit or something, a climate controlled one would be ideal, or at least insulating the box so that they're kept at a more stable temp. In the home, I'd keep them away from any vents/heaters.

As far as humidity goes, it's less damaging to plastics than a lot of other materials, but you still want to avoid any large fluctuations that will cause the material to expand and shrink (and eventually crack). Wherever you're storing your figures, try to make sure it's somewhere <65% RH (this is a high cutoff compared to most materials, so your home is probably fine unless you live somewhere humid without A/C).

Pollutants are a big one for plastics. Dust can cause microabrasions and damage over time, so keeping your figures clean is a good idea. I'd use a soft brush to avoid scratching your figures, or a lightly moist swab of some kind. Don't risk any kind of chemical cleaners, bleach, vinegar, etc. and I'd even avoid compressed air to be safe. If you want to be really careful about it, wash your hands before handling your figures. Humans carry all kinds of oil and dirt on their fingers- that's why museum professionals are often wearing gloves.

And then there's the problem of off-gassing...

Plastics can unfortunately give off vapours that can negatively affect other plastics in their vicinity. The especially bad ones are called malignant plastics (evil, scary), but it's hard to ID them until they start falling apart or damaging the things around them. Best course of action is to reduce contact between different figures (pose them together, but maybe don't leave someone's hand on someone else's shoulder for five years), and make sure that there's good ventilation.

If you're going to box up figures, don't be like me and store them in your parents' basement for years in an airtight container :') Go for a more pourous material like archival grade corrugated board, and use something as a buffer between figures like polyethylene bags/sheeting so that they're not touching (there's pros and cons to sealing each individual figure in a polyethylene bag- it'll be trapped with its own gases which could speed up deterioration, but the microclimate will keep it from affecting other figures around it).

And if you have boxed figures.... either commit to leaving them boxed forever or crack those bad boys open. My partner opened up their Pacific Rim figures after several years of them stewing in their own vapours and sadly they ended up falling apart in their hands. Thanks NECA.

As for manufacturing, you'd have to ask a chemist! I'm not sure exactly what it is that turns certain plastics to gunk and causes others to shatter, but I'm sure standardizing the way we make them would go a long way. Unfortunately, the stuff that's going to better for the planet in the long run (biodegradable) is also going to deteriorate quicker by design, so that's a whole other issue.

Anyway! That's a lot of info, but I hope it was an interesting and/or helpful introduction to plastic care lol. If you're interested in more thorough reading, I'll direct you to the CCI's handy dandy free online resource. They're an invaluable resource for all kinds of materials care.

[morgenlich]

THANK YOU for posting about that 100 companies thing. That has annoyed tf out of me for years tysm

lol yeah! it’s something i’ve never really seen refuted so i never really questioned it; all criticism surrounding it has had to do with people who saw that statistic and said “oh! none of what i do actually matters in fighting climate change so i can continue on as is” which!! would be the incorrect thing to do even if that stat were, at face value, true—but it’s not! those companies (AND GOVERNMENT ENTITIES) don’t exist in a vacuum, they are not polluting for the sake of polluting—oil companies extract oil in no small part because people purchase gasoline in order to fuel their cars. you driving a car is in fact a part of the problem! this doesn’t mean don’t ever drive or anything, but this world is made up of connections—corporations are not on some other plane of existence! you are connected to them, both because they impact you, and because you impact them.

[gotta-pet-em-all]

"average galarian is always lost" factoid actualy just statistical error. average galarian has a sense of direction. Wanders Leon, who lives in Postwick & gets lost in his own town, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

i wasn't even going to question it honestly, galarians are just insane. seriously who tf uses celcius it's so bad for measurement of temp outside of science

[thomas-mvller]

So i was tagged by my buddy Ander aka @miasanmuller to make Bundesliga predictions for the upcoming season! let's see how optimistic i am 🤪

Bundesliga prediction time: answer the following questions about this bundesliga season

1. Top 5 Bundesliga Teams at the end of the season?: to be quite honest i'm not properly informed on other teams' signings like the bees could've signed usain bolt yet i'd have no idea so statistically speaking i wouldn't be able to answer, but my guess would be (in no particular order) bayern since everyone are betting all their coins on hurri kane despite we have more problems yet to solve, dortmund bc it still stings them how close they were last season, hopefully union won't lose momentum given the good season they had, bremen has fulle so i hope the team does good and i want one of the newbies to be this season's dark horse so either darmstadt or heidenheim!

That's such a long answer wtf 😭

2. How far will Bayern get in the DFB Pokal?: probably will get kicked out around november, hopefully that won't be the case but as i said, unless we solve our keeper problems then maaaaybe it could go farther

3. How far will Bayern get in the Champions League?: harold kane better win us the sextuple this season because i still can't conceive why tf bayern spent so much money on him 😭 realistically maybe quarterfinals if we get relatively easy teams, if we don't then damn, don't even want to think about it

4. Who will be Bayerns top goal scorer?: i am so digging this serge renaissance, hopefully it'll be his year. Him or pavard since he was our goalscorer last season 😂

5. Biggest surprise? (could be anything): xabi alonso definitely changed things at leverkusen so maybe their new signings will stir some shit up!

6. Biggest disappointment? (could be anything): i am still not entirely sold on guerreiro, i guess it's a matter of "wait and see" but idk, why would someone who adores a team join their opponent? know what i mean?

I think everyone got tagged in it so I'm tagging whoever wants to do this! just say i tagged you 😊

[lord-of-fun-fools-and-fuckery]

fics i want for the batfam

a fic where damian, duke and tim get lost in England together just as civilians. they're still vigilantes but they're forced on break. Cass is also there but no one but oracle knows. Cass just fucks around making things chaotic.

The Al Ghuls (+jason) hanging out

just a bunch of times where steph is recognised as apable/impressive to the batfam

more dick's batman era fics where they are just found family. all of them. Alfred, Babs, Steph, Dick and damian.

Helena being steph's big sister

dick jason and cass acting immature and childish together (they deserve it)

jay not telling the bats he's hood and just kinda does his killing thing but ends up like being a huge softie with the birds and batman doesn't go on his ass for the killing thing- cause ever since red hood appeared statistics have gotten better. and he becomes like- an ally??? he like goes into the cave but he keeps his hood on and doesn't show his face. and the bats are chill. even funnier if JL/YJ/Titans saw him once or twice and went "who tf is that one?" "hood?" "who is he?" "no fucking clue, but he's really gentle" "he has guns & explosives with kryptonite strapped to his thigh"

cass just having a break down.

Where oracle helps like CONSISTENTLY LIKE FAIL WITHOUT THEM on teams like JL, Titans, BoP, Bats&Birds and YJ and the non-bats/birds try to find out her identity but fail??? and then they're lowkey scared cause holy fuck why do they know so much. Then they meet babs. and are intimidated.

duke and kate eating fries on a rooftop sharing opinions and insights on the bats + duke being comfortable to ask her questions he wouldn't ask the others.

MORE HOGWARTS AUs specifically ones with tim in slytherin, dick&duke in Gryffindor, Jason in Ravenclaw, and Dami & Cass in Hufflepuff and they all thrive in their houses. other things needed are jay with weasely twins, damian sneaking in other towers because he hates hufflepuff at first by purely fucking scaling the walls. cass being a ginny chaos enabler, jason/duke/dick in tri-wizard tournament and helping harry out, duke explaining his meta powers by "haha guys i swear it 's the wiz-waz-wand lmao", them all ditching the yule ball to hangout and play tag in the forbidden woods.

#only in gotham

everytime the gotham sirens called batman a bitch

JL meeting bat's kids (+steph, kate, harper) and thinking holy fucks sake these guys are scarier than batman. Especially constantine and steph (lmao iconic depressed blondes in completely different directions)

damian, jon and billy batson causing mayhem

steph getting to secretly be a single mom (B doesn't know) but every bat +superman (y'know for funnsies let's throw him in to give steph a heart attack) thinks they are the only one who knows.

if steph never met the bats got herself crazy mentors (league even??) and was strong enough to be recruited to titans while being SIGNIFICANTLY younger so it's basically them fighting to adopt spoils. who, no, has not shown her face yet.

wayne memes where social media users talk about how much of a meme the waynes are also who tf is steph she is everywhere but she isn't even famous or a wayne and is she a in-law or step-sis?

benard being the batshit crazy one in him and tims relationship

Oliver queen just witnessing mental breakdowns from every bat (yes even the big man) without them knowing he's there and him just slowly walking away with chips or something trying not to crunch loudly so they won't notice him but he's hallway already crunching.

dick just crashing at different titans places when bruce kicks him out and him REFUSING to explain (no, no one in JL knows where robin is but when he's gone THEY ARE SCARED)

[azural83]

Idea 3: Pizzaplex is an engineering disaster waiting to happen.

An idea that I don't see brought up at all, is the idea that the Pizzaplex is not constructed well.

Remember in FNAF 6 when the tutorial unit said this?

"There may be times when you purchase something of questionable quality, and we don't blame you. Cutting corners is just good business."

Keep this statement in mind while I bring up my next point. As someone who's taken an engineering class, when you are constructing a building, there are a VERY large number of codes (rules) that you need to follow for every conceivable part of it.

Fazbear Entertainment would probably find it a lot cheaper just to pay off the people inspecting the plex than to actually put money into making sure everything is up to code.

They would also try to construct the building as cheaply as possible, trying to "cut corners" wherever they could. They use substandard materials and contractors that don't double-check their work. They built the mall itself over the subterranean remains of their old restaurant, despite this making the ground very unstable.

This all works in my mind because Fazbear Entertainment has been proven to follow the "be as cheap as possible" and "maximize profits by any means necessary" approaches many times in the past.

Here is just one example of a code being violated, according to Section 1006.2.1.1 of Utah Building Codes, "Three exits or exit access doorways shall be provided from any space with an occupant load of 501 to 1,000. Four exits or exit access doorways shall be provided from any space with an occupant load greater than 1,000." We only see 2 public exits in the game, and the Pizzaplex likely holds well over a thousand people at any one time. What's worse is that one of the exits, the only one designated for emergencies, requires a VIP pass in order to be used.

If Fazbear Entertainment is willing to do this to cut costs, who knows what else they have done?

It's why, in my mind, I don't have Gregory live at the pizzaplex after the 3-star ending. Freddy would calculate that it is statistically safer for Gregory to live in his box than at the plex. He instead lives with Vanessa, creating opportunities for them to grow closer.

BTW This has happened in real life, even down to the shoddy construction and profit maximization. It was the Sampoong Department store collapse. Link

This is really interesting! I never knew about these,I'm far from an expert but building codes are never for money,they're supposed to save lives which definitely is something the fazbear entertainment would ignore

I always saw the whole light and colorful theme they had in sb was not only to gather more audience but to cover their dark past (which somehow they manged to..not get in trouble for it?) Although I still don't understand how tf they never went bankrupt,so I just viewed the whole pizzaplex built on the old diner in a metaphor way too

Anyway I really like how you include more of fazbear because the games sure as hell don't give us too much information, I personally love the whole entertainment being in on it or just...straight up ignoring everything because all they care about is money (then again we don't have any canon reason for them to not be like this in sb soo)

[exactlysizzlingdonut]

bro ok ik I was being all jokey-jokey in my last post for my statistics exam but guys I am seriously fucked for it. so I’ve basically secured 40% of my final grade, final exam is 50%. and yes stats is not my strength ok…

um anyways I need to get the remaining 10% from this final exam but I have a feeling that it will be quite difficult bc I think the exam is out of 50 and so I’ll need to rack up at least 5 marks (aiming for 10 just to be safe 😝) to pass. barely.

because um excuse me why tf would I want to repeat this course even though it’s my fault for falling behind and not studying until the very last minute?

im kinda already in gov debt bc of these courses and I DO NOT want to be paying just to repeat this course. even though it’s on me HAHNAHAS

I cannot wait for this shit to be over and done with FUCK.

also chem exam went pretty welll! last question abt nmr fucked me in the ass but otherwise it was chill. much better than last term’s chem exam that’s for sure 💀

[twunkzilla]

Bro honestly simple classes are rigged way more than complex "hard" classes cause they essentially demand complex abstract thought and your ability to obediently follow standardized expectations more than your own skill or critical, realistic thought. Like math is absolutely demonic cause they essentially just force you to learn things without you understanding wtf you are doing like Algebra you're not gonna join the military and have your commander go WHAT IS Y = 9x + 1 SOLDIER like hell noooo bro we are getting fucking invaded LMAO no more United States but like they don't bother to show you even for a minute how this skill translates to surveying and shit like that. It's like imagine somebody forces you to learn an extremely complex left vs right and gives you no idea why you are learning that. Especially in Statistics cause that is something you actually use but they don't have you use it in conjunction with anything else like explaining a study or translating it into real life so they will have you answer a question like "average family has 2.63 kids" like you don't sound like you're on coke. Especially those bullshit variable classifications like that is not a science this is an abstract description that's meant to be the most appropriate to the system you're using. But the textbook will just tell you there is a right or wrong answer to a vague ass question with no answer like their opinion is gospel and when you ask why you're met with jargon and you feel like a fucking idiot. Like I guess it makes job security for teachers but those motherfuckers don't even know what tf they are talking about half the time

[kyaruun]

QIAN THE KISSER lmaooo my ultimae attack is just plopping a heart shape pillow onto everyone that does 99% of total HP damage... i am uncreative these days lilikags only exists because my first oc ever evolved into the sister of kageyama tobio from hq.. which i was obsessed with when i entered this site. nazu-yume turned into nazukisser one day and i do not regret my only ever URL change for a blog that didn't completely change its purpose. riddle-lovehearts was cute on my end. i just think it was cute. but sakunyas is so so so cute its so you very smart indeed

oh these are exams administered not by the school itself but uh. by a company. who charges like 90 dollars per exam. that you statistically will probably not pass. and everyone buys into it because at least taking the course shows you try hard. which helps you get into a good university. better if you scored a 4 or 5, which then again you need to pay to report to Each School You Apply To

when will the collegeboard (this company) get competition that knocks it off its fucking high horse

yeah im taking calc ab which is like. calc 1? and calc bc is calc 1 and 2 in the same amt of time? maybe its bcs all the smart kids go into calc bc is prob why the pass rate is good

oh yeah uh, the grading goes like ... this. they have very strict guidelines on how to grade. so for frq (free response question) if like any of x, x, or x are true, score whatever number it tells you to. if the response gets past those and if any of x x or x are true, score a 6 or smth. and whether the response reached that, depends on the ap graders, who are stuck into this huge place in like idk minnesota and they just grade all day. all day. like they have a quota of like 200 or 300 exams to go through and grade. for mcq its either right or wrong the computer can grade that they prob just scan it all in the scantron

for language yeah it depends on the teacher and how they prepare you for the test over the years you learn the language idk if you did the STAMP test or whatever but i got like one of the top scores in the class for speaking, a 5 5 6 7 (reading, writing, listening, speaking) so technically i have a good chance at ap japanese exam but am i going to sit through sensei's class for another year? hell the fuck no.

i have no idea where they got that, because i was like "tf is happening" this entire year. so like i don't know. but i passed.

ANYWAYS waaaaa ive been taking a break so its really hard for me to accept that i am hardworking even though a lot of people say so? maybe its because like every time i slack i get scolded by someone at home LOL but ive been resting the last 6 days so yeah (spring break)

thankyouuuu if i gibe up all my hobbies i really wont have anything left for me so i have to just. idk find some way to enjoy at least one of them and stick with it till i find something that brings me a lot of joy again 👍🏻someday

anyways sorry this ended up being Extremely Long i can go off about the collegeboard forever. they sent me a text yesterday saying that ap exams are coming up.

jesus christ i'm not surprised you're stressed it sounds so insane. feels like the more you read about it the more braincells you lose ;; i won't complain about the spanish system every agai-- well no i will because it sucks ass but you get the point ;;;

having at least one hobby you can go to to disconnect from responsabilities it's pretty much a need tbh writing is fun. drawing. having an insane brainrot over a cute bunch of pixels <3 anything works as long as it makes your life a bit easier. sometimes even silly things like talking to someone, finding a new game etc

[returnofahsoka]

uhh anyone else grew up doing well at school but struggles in higher education because you are afraid of asking questions if you didn't get something for the first time and feeling like somehow you instinctively have to know everything or else you'll be seen as dumb???

[shepherds-of-haven]

Hope you had a fun week !! I was curious how would a trip to the amusement park go for the shepherds?

Thank you so much, it was literally one of the best trips I've ever gone on! :) And ooh, great question! Can you imagine all of the Shepherds going to an amusement park together?? The chaos... 🎠🎡

Blade: amusement parks are probably a bit too loud, crowded, and chaotic for him to be really gung-ho about, but he'd go! He probably wouldn't say too much but would patiently and long-sufferingly go on every ride everyone else wanted to go on... but he's not easily impressed, so you'd go on an intense rollercoaster and glance back and his face would be like 😐 gfldgjfdlg but then once night fell and you got him into one of those haunted houses, he'd get really tense and probably end up punching some poor carnival worker through the mirror maze!

Trouble: amusement parks are HIS JAM, I think he'd go to one on a first date if he could! He'd want to hit up all the most thrilling and intense roller coasters, eat all of the most indulgent, greasiest food, and play all of the carnival games! He 100% would love to show off his skills at those shooting games and win everyone fat prizes. By the time it was time to head back, he'd probably pass tf out in the backseat or on the train home from all of the sugar he inhaled, but he'd be having a grand old time all day!

Tallys: she's Not About that amusement park life, but she'd go along just to please everyone else! I think she'd mostly just be chilling in the under the umbrella of a shaded table in her sunglasses, reading a book or watching everyone else go on the coasters or taking pictures for them (totally of her own accord)! If she's in a more festive mood, I think she'd go for the calmer, chiller rides, like the "It's a Small World"-style boat rides or perhaps renting a tandem bike, something like that!

Shery: she'd be the person who brought a big backpack full of snacks and water and first-aid stuff for everyone else, because she knows Blade is going to need sunscreen but won't bring it on his person himself, and Trouble is going to need water after he almost throws up from the inevitable funnel-cake eating contest with Ayla and Red, and etc.! She'd wear a big sun hat and look very cute, and would be drawn to all the cute stuff at the amusement park, like taking a selfie with the big mascots and the princesses and etc.! She would definitely not want to go on any coasters or intense rides, but she'd be happy to watch on the sidelines with Tallys!

idk why i put that particular gif glfjgldfjgfd i just remembered amagi brilliant park and it made me laugh

Riel: he thinks amusement parks are unsanitary cesspits for howling ape children and plebs, so it would take a LOT of convincing for anyone to get him to go in lieu of just, like, staying home and working. If he were persuaded to go, he would come wearing shades, gloves, and most likely a dramatic scarf or hat, would refuse to touch anything without sanitizing it first, wouldn't sit unless he could perch on his handkerchief, and definitely wouldn't go on any rides, citing horrific accident and injury statistics anytime Trouble called him a baby for not going on the Steel Vengeance: Devil's Thunder 365 ride. He might nibble on some food or annoy some psychics or those carnival barker people who guess your weight or something, though!

Chase: oh boy, if you think his normal energy is high, wait until you see his Amusement Park Energy! He's all over the place, serving as the group's enthusiastic tour guide except he has no idea where he's going and is just picking sights and locations at random, easily distracted by any loud color, sight, or sound that passes his way. He is having a GRAND old time! You have to keep a close eye on him, though, because he might be slipping stray treats off of stalls and turning up with a whole smorgasbord in his hands, conning surly stall workers out of their stuffed animals and passing them to kids on the sly, pretending that his seatbelt isn't working on the worst ride possible just to freak the other passengers out, or pretending to lean and go "whoaaaaa!" against the Ferris Wheel cart just to aggravate Riel's vertigo and Red's panic instinct. He is also definitely the one playing 'matchmaker' and pairing people off to go through the haunted house together, ostensibly also to troll and maximize the memories/drama. It's chaotic but he's the life of the party and everyone is having a great time!

Halek: he's content to just chill and let everyone else have a raucous time. He is particularly interested in the amusement park food and can be found slouched on various benches around the park eating an ice cream cone or slowly chewing a soft pretzel while keeping one hand up to keep the sun out of his eyes. Comically, he has also been found with his overly-tall body slumped over one of the horses on the carousel and crammed into a tiny kid's roller coaster, which is just a scream for everyone else. No explanation for why he felt compelled to ride the Dumbo ride, he just wanted to feel the breeze in his hair!

Red: he is just vibing, looking forward to having a corndog, maybe some shaved ice or cotton candy: basically the normal amusement park experience! He's the type of person to actively collect all of the park brochures and maps, plan out the most efficient route, have an exact itinerary with the best ride times and accounting for lines and rushes... but for the benefit of the group, he could take or leave really any of the rides! He's most interested in the visual displays, like shows, plays, parades, exhibits, and fireworks displays!

Ayla: she's an adrenaline junkie, so she's racing Trouble to get to all of the most extreme rides and screaming her lungs out on the steepest drops and scariest roller coasters. She doesn't have time for any of the sissy stuff, she wants THRILLS! She's the type to be really impatient and want to either cut in line or complain loudly when other people either cut or dawdle. She can get so focused on the next ride that she'll barrel through a mascot, bowl over a princess, or even run through a pack of unsuspecting children!

Briony: she's extremely memory and experience-based, so her number #1 priority is that everyone is having a good time and laughing and making lots of joyous memories. To that end, she wants to do everything and is anxious to cram it all into one day! (This is where Red is very helpful.) She can come off as mother hen-y or bossy by the way she herds everyone to the next destination, but she actually brings order to the chaos and ensures they actually get to do stuff and stay together instead of just scattering to the four winds. She has a very romanticized idea of amusement parks in her head, so she really wants to do things like win a prize at the stalls, sit in the Ferris Wheel and see the fireworks, share an ice cream cone with someone, that sort of thing, and she either gets obsessive (prizes) or disappointed if it doesn't turn out the way she thought (the ice cream splats on the ground, the fireworks are blocked by trees, etc.)!

Lavinet: she's the group photographer and is the one taking pictures of everything, whether or not she's in the actual photos herself. Food and group candid shots feature prominently in her work, which are posted to social media accordingly. She is dressed entirely too posh for the occasion and refuses to go on coasters that could whip her hair around; she also decided to wear high heels, for some reason. She likes doing the fun, kitschy stuff like getting her fortune drawn at the psychic stall or shopping. If the amusement park is attached to a hotel, she is also very interested in spending some time at the spa or pampering herself there!

Caine: it's far more likely that he's at the amusement park with friends of his own age rather than traipsing around with the adults, and he'd be just a little rocket zooming around to all of the rides with a sticky, half-melted stick of cotton candy clutched in his hand and a wad of huge stuffed animals slung over his shoulder!

[yelenasdog]

the pillowtalk of a pessimist (spencer reid x fem reader)

genre: fluff with a millisecond of angst

summary: pillowtalk takes an interesting turn for spencer at the mention of the harsh realities of his work.

words: 1.3k, she’s a shorty.

warnings: nsfw themes (nothing smutty, it’s just implied and also directly stated that they slept together), typical criminal minds violence + death, and maybe cursing? idk. 

a/n: btw this isn’t the fic i was ranting on about that i’m writing, she’s still in the works. also! this could be an x oc or anybody bc i didn’t use y/n if you would prefer to read it as such.

🂦∙🂦∙🂦

A pale stream of moonlight shone through the open window of apartment 23, the home of Doctor Spencer Reid. It illuminated a small section of his bedroom, specifically on one of his many floor to ceiling bookshelves, a beacon of knowledge that was there 24/7 for the taking.

The gold engravings on the spines of his many reads shimmered, a beautiful contrast to the dark mahogany the shelf was made out of.

The room smelled like a mixture of his cologne, her perfume (Chanel no. 5, specifically), and the results of their previous affairs that lingered in the crisp air of the night.

She took a deep breath, settling down further into the white duvet, pulling it over her bosom in response to the chilly temperature. The dark green walls of the room welcomed and calmed her, overwhelming the girl with a wave of serenity that could only be brought to her by him.

He quickly took note of her unsteady breathing and shift in position, immediately jumping to action. He pulled her closer by her shoulders with his strong arms, eliciting a squeal from her and a chuckle from him, more so at her reaction than the move itself.

Her head laid on his bare chest, her hair splayed out with half of it residing on his pillow, the other half on his bicep. She could have appeared to be an angel, although in his eyes, she truly was.

She rested her hand on the left side of his chest over his heart, her fingernail ghosting shapes on his tanned skin. Circles, squiggly lines, even abstract faces.

“How do you do it?”

Her voice was quiet, barely above a whisper. If his hearing wasn’t so acute, he was sure he would have missed it. This would have saddened the genius greatly, as he valued everything she had to say with a burning ferocity, and even one word lost would be a shame.

“What?”

He was confused by the nature of the question, attempting to search every corner of his brilliant brain for what she might have been referencing. Was it an equation? No, she hated math. Perhaps the way he so effortlessly could play any instrument because yet again, math. He decided that couldn’t be the subject at question either, she played better than he did, glorious melodies flowed from her fingertips. So the doctor was truly stumped.

The answer was simpler than he had imagined.

“Your job.”

With those doe eyes he was so fond of, she looked up, meeting his own glance.

If the term “heart eyes” was able to be personified, Spencer would be the guy to personify it whenever his eyes landed on the one in front of him.

“What do you mean? I get up in the morning, drink some coffee, and get to it.”

She giggled, but the sound he loved so much ceased with her pout.

“That’s not what I mean, Spence. How do you go on everyday, seeing body after body,” she trailed off, obviously distraught. Spencer wrapped his large hand tighter around her, placing his chin on her hairline.

“How do you consistently manage to look at these victims, these people, with lives that they never got to finish living-“ A tear slipped down her cheek, she bit her bottom lip, tasting her own salty droplets on her tongue. She sniffled, burying her head further in his neck with what he presumed was shame.

“And not break down when you do.” Her voice was muffled, but the emotions she felt were evident nonetheless.

He took a moment to carefully articulate an appropriate response. The gears in his mind turned ever so diligently, finding a solution to dry her tears.

“It’s not much different than what I initially said. I get up in the morning, drink some coffee.”

He pushed a hair away from her face, admiring her distinct features as he often did. She looked up, moving her left hand to trace his sharp jaw as he sat in thought.

“And I realize that these people that are now dead, are a part of the hundreds, of throusands, of millions of people that die every year. It’s a part of life, what gives it meaning.”

She gave a dry, humourless laugh.

“What, you don’t have a specific statistic for that?”

“Oh, I do, but I don’t think you want to hear it.” He tilted his head, weighing the option of disclosing the information but deciding against it.

“But the bottom line is, they have families. Families that are grieving, and hurting, and needing answers and justice. I cannot do my job and give them the closure they deserve if I’m staying focused on my own emotions and delving deep into who the victims were, rather than how to catch those responsible for hurting them.”

She moved on to her back, stilling managing to keep her eye contact with Spencer.

“But you’re a profiler! That’s what you do! You’re supposed to, what did you call it, ‘delve deep’ into who they are.”

“Pretty girl, are you trying to tell the one with 3 doctorates how to do his job?”

She rolled her eyes, lazily throwing a hand on his neck, right behind his ear. She ran it back and forth, savoring the intimate moment.

“Yeah, yeah. Shut up, Agent.” She taunted, poorly trying (and failing) to agitate Spencer. She had a hunch (that was more true than either of them would let on) that it wasn’t possible for her to do so, and he found himself proving it to be correct.

“I just had to learn to let the family do what they had to do so that I could do the same.”

The girl’s tone softened as she spoke, staring at the popcorn ceiling.

“I guess so. I’m just too empathetic, my heart is too pure.” She joked, a feathery laugh falling past both of their lips.

“Of course. I would expect nothing less.” He teased back, enjoying the dynamic they both held in the tender moment.

“You amaze me.” She muttered, leaning in, analyzing him and his ruffled post-sex hair, his gorgeously long lashes, and his light 5 o’clock shadow that donned his chin.

He huffed quietly, doing the exact same thing, minus the scruff of course.

“I could say the same to you, pretty girl.”

Their lips connected once again, in a different manner than the feverish and needy kiss from before.

This time, it was a union of two individuals, allowing themselves to mould together in a way only the two of them could. It was slower and sweeter, with more feeling poured into their lips while they moved in sync.

“M’ tired.”

“Yeah? You wanna go to sleep, bubs?”

She grinned as she snuggled into his arms, her exhausted eyes fluttering to a close.

“Bubs, huh? That’s new.”

A worried frown made its way onto his face as he rushed to cover up his previous words.

“D-do you not like it? I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable-“

“Spence.”

He stopped, looking over her for any microexpressions, only seeing positive signs. That wasn’t technically profiling, right? He hoped he would be in the clear if she ever was to find out.

“I love it, baby. Say it again.”

“Bubs?”

“Mhm. Say it again.” She sounded with content. He smirked, a proud feeling infiltrating his body, causing him to puff up his chest in the slightest way.

“Goodnight, bubs.”

He reached up, his paranoia forcing him to close the window above him, despite being a more than qualified FBI agent with a revolver safely tucked away in the top drawer of his night stand that never quite was shut all the way.

It was just the pessimist in him.

She wrapped around his figure, intertwining his form with her own.

“Sleep well, Spence.”

He felt happy with her, happier than he had been in a long time. He relished in that, allowing it to lull him to a well needed rest.

But what could he say, she just brought out the optimist in him.

🂦∙🂦∙🂦

hj posting at a time that isn’t 3 am?????? unheard of. also i may or may not have pulled an all nighter to write whatever tf this is bc my ex posted something with his new gf and i felt pathetic LMAO. anyway, i hope your day is fabulous, go drink some water and remember things are what you make of them and it’s all about intent! love you, xx hj.

[transsexualhamlet]

the more i rewatch tpn season two the less sense it makes

why did norman go to lambda instead of immediately getting killed without the reason of the queen wanting personally to eat him

why did yuugo say in the note he left for anyone who read it to have hope, that’s out of character lol

the amount of plot convenience they had to throw in that still didn’t even cover everything that happened

what was emma’s necklace even good for tbh????

how were the kids just safe in the human world without the promise yet wouldn’t they be hunted down outside there’s other ratris than peter i promise and cause no yuugo they didnt die

when did the fucking timeskip happen???? because by the dates on Anna’s diary it should be in the bunker. but they talk about it like they were only in the bunker for like. a week

how did norman not grow like two feet in a year but he still is dying from experiments like. what is he dying from then, chronic gifted kid syndrome?

also how did they manage this without norman being william minerva like statistically how tf did they do that they don’t even have any other kids they say they liberated farms but how do you do that with Five Children are you trying to tell me he just like ammassed this power and thinks hes gonna be able to take out the major fucking cities with 5 kids and a drug they made in their basement

literally anything that happened in the goddamn slideshow ending. what even. chronologically that doesn’t even make sense how did they even do the capital battle

HOW DID THE KIDS EVEN GET THROUGH THE GODDAMN GATES BEFORE MAKING A NEW GODDAMN PROMISE THAT WAS THE POINT YOU PHYSICALLY COULD NOT GET THROUGH 

GOD MADE THE FUCKING RULE I DONT THINK THEY CAN JUST WALTZ RIGHT IN CAUSE PETER RATRI FUCKING SLIT HIS OWN THROAT

in other words i have questions :)

[empty-masks]

Geissler’s Journal, Day 9

CW: Sexual References.

Geissler’s Internship Log, Day 9 “Core Strength”   

Much has happened today, mainly pertaining to what I did after I had finished my shift. So, in order to get you, dear reader, to those details with a swiftness, I shall thus summarize what I did during my workday less thoroughly than I usually might.   

Dr. Toth had assigned me the True Fox Body Type of the Anthropomorphic Umbrella (serial HA[Tf]). There was nothing out of the ordinary to sift through from the Loading Bay— new reports concerning their naturally stealthy capabilities when in the Eternal Autumn and other such tree-filled environs, variations on their fur coatings and how statistically they are more likely to appear similarly to their animal counterparts (orange, grey, black, dull brown, etcetera), but how statistics have not stopped from certain individuals from appearing as colours such as bright crimson, dark blue, or even, and I quote, “radioactive green”, as one member of the Body Type referred to themselves.

There was new census data concerning their average height, weight, and eye colour, with the first aspect’s range having shrunk an astounding 3 inches from 5’7” to 5’10” (surprisingly similar to that of Basic Humans) to that of 5’4” to 5’7”. The True Fox Body Type Entry makes note of this difference when compared to that of the Wolfhound Body Type Entry, and how their ranges are, as of last census’ results, almost an entire ten inches apart in average height.   

If I am being frank, quite a lot of work today felt as though Dr. Toth was attempting to keep me from musing more about anything relating to his side-gig, and while I for one understand the merits of putting one’s nose to the metaphorical grindstone, I did not quite understand why he thought it would deter me.   

He did not answer many of the questions I asked him today (at least at work), and he tried very hard to hide his secret research from me once again (his sense of secrecy seems to wax and wane when he is feeling insecure).   

On the bus back home, I asked Dr. Washing whether Dr. Toth was going to perform today. She said that he was, but advised me against going. She warned me that I would distract him from his performance, or that I could potentially get him in trouble. When I countered that people from the office seem to see him perform every week just fine without any sort of issue, she seemed to silently admit how flimsy her argument was of an excuse. I then asked her whether she would accompany me to the club, and she flat out refused, which I was thoroughly disappointed to hear. It meant that tonight, I was to go to a club I was entirely unfamiliar with to see what the deal was with a coworker’s side performance.   

And that is exactly what I did. Recalling the details of the club, it was small but tall. The byways for foot traffic were quite narrow (only allowing for one person travel at any given moment, unless you were prepared to throw yourself onto one of the couches alongside a group of drunk strangers), the seating was low to the ground (and I witnessed many people simply laying on them instead of slumping to the degree that was needed to properly have a seat), and the performances were done on a series of elevated stages illuminated by lights (but were inaccessible through any means of backstage area, as the performers I witnessed had to walk out from a side door, wade through the crowd, and hop up onto the platform to begin working).   

The music was a little perplexing, but I eventually decided that I would call it “Soft Electro-Sex” until I am told the actual name of the genre. I grabbed myself a seat at the bar, ordered myself a tall glass of ice-cold water, and I asked the bartender whether Dr. Toth was performing today. I could tell that she was amused by the way she answered me, commenting that I was “another one of his groupies”, and saying that it won’t be long now, considering the timeframe. I did not have long to consider her comment (and in hindsight it was a little offensive), as it was as she said, Dr. Toth had clambered up onto the platform.   

You know, it is odd to see someone whose mental image you’ve built of is that of a lab coat, thick dress pants, and a wool sweater vest on top of a plain white dress shirt, appear as Dr. Toth did. To summarize, he wore a choice few items of form-fitting black leather with straps that seemed to have no functional purpose, he had inserted a colourful mane of false feathers alongside his usual blue head feathers, and I believe that he was wearing contacts (I have never seen him without a pair of thick glasses, and I was under the impression that he was blind as a bat without them).

In truth, I was impressed. I was unsure if he was the same Dr. Toth I knew from the WCSC at first, but when I saw him linger on my position after a particularly acrobatic spinning move, I knew for certain that it was him. I simply never knew that he had such core strength underneath all those feathers. I waved, and he waved back, before shaking his head and continuing his performance. Which, I might add, was quite popular with everyone surrounding his podium. By the end, there was hardly a place he could put a foot without trodding on a bank note.

I wish I could’ve spoken to him after, but after he had finished his performance with a bow, he gathered up his take for the day and immediately exited the club’s floor without fanfare. I decided to leave as well, having hardly touched my water.Now, as I sit here in my room during these unholy hours of the morning, I am sure you’re wondering, dear reader— is he attractive?

Yes, he is attractive. In a, “this person is like a puzzle I am addicted to solving”, sort of sense. And he is physically attractive. But I consider that aspect less important than the mystery.

And I am simply asking into the wind here, but how in the world is someone able to hang upside down for so long without vomiting all over themselves and the crowd, falling over onto their head and snapping their neck, or pulling something so severely that you have to take weeks to recover and undoubtedly lose your regular crowd? Goodness me.

Thank you for reading,

Dr. P.W. Geissler

============================================================== 

[[ Table of Contents ]]

[saepiae]

i think it's so criminal to make stats questions abt things that i inherently dont understand, like i dont know all the terminology or how insurance even works how tf do u expect me to be able to answer this question statistically omygod. similarly when they make it abt sports or cars like i dont know SHIT abt cars and they're making me do stats on it . failed at step 1 innit