#thank u adhd superpower

[alicentsgf]

its such a burden being innately cool. i tell another queer that the first album I ever bought for myself was life in cartoon motion by mika and that my first concert was Marina pre-electra heart and they think i'm lying like sorry mini me was so awesome ig. this is same friend who will deny I told them to check out MUNA in 2018 and then put silk chiffon on their playlist and say they discovered them... I should be legally allowed to bite him.

[haejjoon]

BARKBARK I LOVE TRANS HCS im not trans myself but when i see how happy they make my trans friends & my partner???? TOSSES THEM AROUND LIKE CANDY u get a trans hc! u get a trans hc! WE ALL GET TRANS HCS

also may i say. adhd/autistic phantoms ? good shit

also ur mention of how trans goro is more common than trans akiren makes me wanna pop off about infantilization in fandoms and how it ties into misogyny, trans-misogyny and nsfw content and its characterizations and just fjbvkfnb. im a social sciences major and i LOVE discussing infantilization in the context of sex and gender and disability i love that shit. anyway idk where i was going with this but tldr i love ur characterization of goro <3

OHHHHH ANON YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU JUST STARTED.....

prefacing this by saying: i have adhd. although i haven't been able to be properly diagnosed (with the things hooked up to my head etc etc) thanks to america's stunning healthcare, i am like.. 99.999999% sure i have it. my therapist, who i used to see regularly, agrees that i probably have it.

NOW. i'm sure we all know that futaba sakura our favorite gremlin girl ever exhibits some clear symptoms of autism. i don't need to get into it because there's a million and one analyses out there about her behavior, but i will say that i both love/hate how atlus depicted her. on one hand i love that the group just.. accepts her for who she is, i love that they don't try to change her, i love that they don't fall into the "ooh you're so smart though so your disability MUST be a superpower!" trap, and that they mold around her to suit her, and not the other way around.

THAT BEING SAID.....

i have SUCH a bone to pick with how they decided to go about her 'healing' arc. the phantom thieves give her a week--a WEEK--to readjust to society. and yeah i guess that while you could argue that she's just had her trauma supernaturally lobotomized out of her, it doesn't change the fact that she's... still gone through it, you know? just because she learned to stop hating herself for things out of her control doesn't mean her social anxiety disappears in a snap. she turns out alright by the end but the extremely pushy nature of the thieves to get her out of her shell ALWAYS rubbed me wrong. taking things slow and one step at a time is wonderful, and i'm glad they decided to go about that approach instead of just throwing her to the beach like they originally wanted, but they still should have taken it... slower. one week is HARDLY enough.

also, i fucking hate how they constantly talk about her while she's in the same room as them, as if she can't hear what they're saying. they said things like, "oh she's pretty normal, huh" and "she can hold a conversation just fine!" and while their behavior isn't one completely out of the ordinary for dumb teenagers to exhibit, it still really, really pisses me off that they do it wiht her in the SAME ROOM. im sure it wasn't meant to come off this way, but i always got the feeling that they attributed her 'quirkiness' to her not understanding how groups worked at all, which is why they were so open about discussing HER MENTAL HEALTH without including her in the conversation.

okay i'm done with futaba--quick hcs im throwing out there: ryuji has adhd, yusuke also has autism, mishima has autism, goro has ocd. boom bam bop, you've been hit by the 'tism beam.

PLEASE DO POP OFF ABOUT THE INFANTILISM it's honestly such a gross sight.... the amount of times ive seen goro depicted as some small, feminine twink is genuinely staggering, and it's always left such a bad taste in my mouth because i KNOW it's because his character, at least for the majority of the plot, is polite and soft spoken.

not to mention how incredibly fetishizing it feels. i won't get too into it, but the amount of shuakeshu ive seen where one is drawn/written as larger than life/confident/suave and the other is meek/skinny/easily embarrassed? ohhh my god. please. akiren isn't some smooth jerk who makes goro blush with a well-placed quip, and goro isn't a crazed yandere who shuts akiren away from the rest of the world. they're both fucking losers who don't know how to process their feelings for the other because of their very, very embarrassing rivalry. stop degrading one to fit your perfect mlm narrative.

sigh i didn't mean for this to become a social commentary or anything, but .. lo and behold... here we are. i'd love to hear your thoughts on my takes, anon, and i'd love to hear the thoughts for anyone who read thru this too! while i do have adhd/am trans i can't speak for those who fall under the autism spectrum or for cis gay men, so if you'd like to correct me in my thinking PLEASE go ahead and do so, i'd love to be educated on topics i don't fully understand. have a good one <3

[runicsorceress]

{{ ooc: Ahhh! Hi, hello, I'm the writer behind works-of-magic, and your tags on the Misdreavus magic post made me smile so much! Thank you so much. I'm glad you enjoyed it. :} My answer to "how'd you come up with this" is probably three-pronged: 1.) I'm a practicing witch in this life, true story, so things like Magical Associations and What Ghosts Can Do are already a part of my worldview. Pop culture witchcraft and animism are both already parts of my spirituality, so like... imagining how a Pokemon would interact with magic? Been there, done that! And I've been practicing for almost as long as I've been writing Pokemon fanfics!

2.) Which is a long time. Like, since 2007. I haven't gotten to that point in the parts of the fanfic that's, you know, actually Published, but like many writers, I have so many Ideas and Plans that just haven't hit the public yet! Ghost magic is something I've been planning for since the beginning. It's an important part of the Mismagius' subplot in the fanfic. So I've put SO much thought towards it!

3.) I have an incredibly powerful dose of hyperfixated ADHD, which means when my mind latches onto something, like it did with Misdreavus and magic, my mind goes WILD with it! I think about it all the time; even when I'm at work mindlessly doing data entry drone work, there's a part of my mind that's like, "What if a Misdreavus changed the key of their Perish Song and it turned into a lullaby that just puts people/Pokemon to sleep?"

Some of it's probably me being imaginative, yeah, but I have a particular blend of time and obsessive devotion that turns my imagination into a powerhouse superpower for headcanons of the things I Especially Enjoy.

[ooc: ah ok that makes sense ! im not rly sure what else to say tbh.. aside from that ur blog is rly good! i hope to be as good a writer as u someday]

[lawisnotmocked]

Hello sir. You will probably either find this deeply offensive or hilarious but lately I have an obsession with the character of Javert as I recently watched the 2012 Les Mis because “oh the memes about it back in the day were classic.” Yes I am serious sometimes I watch movies just because I liked a YTP of it. Then I find out that in addition to being perfect meme fodder, Javert has a weird one-sided (??) pseudo enemies to loves dynamic with the loaf of bread guy (I did not know his name until like three days ago to me he was always just the guy who sang “I stole a loaf of bread.”)These types of characters who give vibes like they’re lgbt, have dog or cat-like qualities, and are overly dramatic typically become my Blorbos (a similar example would be majima from RGG who’s also a crazy dog-like man who attacks his crush.) SO what I am requesting is could you please give me your crack headcanons about Javert? Like funny shit about Javert. If you have recommends for crack fics about Javert I’d appreciate it, bonus points if any of the headcanons/fics are Valvert cuz idk I just find them really funny together. Prob mostly because of the memes not gonna lie. If you could also educate me on Valjean and Javert’s mannerisms in the Brick I would be most appreciative because to be totally real with u… I’m so sorry but I don’t wanna read or watch parts that are not about him or loaf guy 😬 (ya I kno shame on me and all that…) but I need to know more about how they act so I can make hideous crack fics of my own. Thank u 🙏🐶

First of all anon how does it feel to be the funniest person on the internet this is the best ask I’ve ever received :’3

Even without crack headcanons brick Javert is just absolutely hilarious as a character?? I feel like a lot of adaptations try to take him too seriously and like yeah he does have a serious and tragic aspect to his character but he’s also a very fruity drama queen who has like 0 awareness of his surroundings, acts like a feral dog on crack and has this weird magic power that allows him to know people’s real identity no matter how well disguised they are. (I maintain that les mis does have a form of magic system in the brick but it’s more like mundane mostly useless superpowers?? Like super strength that just makes you a little bit more strong that an average person, or really good instincts or something. Anyway lol)

Some Actual Canon Facts about Javert from the brick are:

- Is implied to have the soul of a dog

- Bares all of his teeth when he smiles

- Fucking hates reading but does it anyway

- Keeps a snuffbox on him at all times and snorts snuff after he feels like an arrest has gone well

- Dissociates for a solid 5 minutes and misses the entirety of a conversation bc someone said something he didn’t agree with

- I know the ‘you need to punish me Mr Mayor’ scene is in the movie but it’s so much funnier in the brick :’3

- Accidentally sets his coat on fire by standing too close to the stove

- Announces himself to Thenardier’s criminal gang who he’s about to arrest by making a stupid joke

- Tells Thenardier that he can shoot him if he wants because the gun will just misfire. Thenardier shoots him and the gun misfires.

- Doesn’t really have any friends and his coworkers don’t like him either because he doesn’t take bribes and refuses to work with criminals to catch other criminals

- There’s an entire Code Of Symbolism in the brick thats purpose is to represent how horny Javert is, which I wrote about here along with some other Javert related stuff

This man is just a fucking disaster honestly :’3 I headcanon that’s he’s ADHD, autistic, severely depressed and probably has some form of childhood PTSD?? But I’ve also seen other people headcanon that he has BPD or OCD and honestly all of them are good hcs because he’s absolutely neurodivergent.

I absolutely understand not wanting to read the whole brick if you only care about two of the characters lol, but the Hapgood English translation of the brick is public domain so I’ve linked a couple of Javert chapters you might find funny!

Javert’s introduction | punish me mr mayor | Javert lends Marius two pistols he never gets back and burns his coat on the stove | Javert arrests Thenardier and tells him to shoot him

Brick Valjean is also a chaotic bitch but he’s less camp and more like a cryptid with PTSD. Off the top of my head he:

- Sews money into the inside of his coat when Cosette is young

- Keeps the rest of his money buried in the woods

- Accidentally convinces some townspeople that he’s the devil by sneaking around said woods

- Stuffs his pockets with wigs and disguises in case he ever needs to make a quick getaway

- Someone tries to rob him and he tackles them to the ground then lectures them on how they should let god into their heart and stop stealing

- Holds a hot poker against his arm when Thenardier tries to extort him for money to intimidate him

- He just really loves Cosette this isn’t a funny or anything he just really loves his daughter and wants the best for her

In the brick Javert also doesn’t even actively seek out Valjean?? They go years without thinking about each other then they run into each other again in the weirdest circumstances and go ‘omg not this weirdo again 🙄’

As for my own favourite crack headcanons :3c

- Modern au Javert is a furry. His fursona is a wolfdog called Orion :-)

- [NSFW] He’s unironically into vore

- He wants a fursuit very badly but he can’t afford it until he’s dating Valjean and Valjean buys him one

- Valjean doesn’t get it but he’s glad his partner is happy :-)

- [NSFW] In my ideal Javert lives modern au he quits the police, goes to therapy and joins a kink group because I think he’d thrive in that environment 😌

- Valjean has like 5 fake driver’s licenses

- Javert will literally comment on how hot he finds a man and still doesn’t realise he’s gay until he makes out with Valjean. Thinks he’s straight even though he’s never been attracted to a woman before. Is literally that unaware of his own feelings.

- Valjean has no fashion sense. He dresses so bad that it comes full circle and it looks like his outfit clashes intentionally. Cosette is horrified.

- Javert is awful to watch movies with, especially detective movies, because he talks the whole time and points out all the inaccuracies

- Valjean never makes eye contact. Javert makes too much very intense eye contact.

- No one invites them to events because they’re awful together. Javert shit talks people’s outfits or decor very loudly to Valjean and Valjean hates socialising and doesn’t want to be there

I don’t think I know any good crack fic bc I mostly just read angst lol uwu’’ but if anyone has any suggestions pls feel free to add them!! I’ll add links if I think of anything though 😌

[maeglinyedi]

the speed at which u write frankly terrifies me how on earth do u have that much stamina?? it's rly impressive, and i gotta say i rly don't care how fast a fic updates i'm just happily surprised when it happens, it just astounds me when i see u posted a new chapter so fast! love your writing btw i would wax poetic abt it all day

The word of the day is: hyperfixation. Thanks to my autistic and ADHD brain I can focus on a task like nobody's business. Whenever my brain focuses on writing, I can comfortably crank out 5k words per day, sometimes even more. To illustrate this point: I wrote roughly 125k words for the Necromancer in just about 35 days. This absolutely wrecked me, though, so being stuck in a hyperfixation is not without its consequences.

But when I go, I go fast, consequences be danned.

The downside to having a neurodivergent brain like this is that I can't pick and choose what I focus on. I might lose complete interest in writing tomorrow and focus on something else for a couple of months before catching the writing bug again. Or my brain may simply decide to suddenly focus on writing an entirely different story, as is happening right now. I have, unfortunately, no control over this.

So while having a neurodivergent brain may seem like having a superpower on the surface, it is often exhausting and frustrating as well. Still, I genuinely love writing, so you won't hear me complaining. Much.

[1eos]

Okay but like.. all you southerners who wear wigs are braver than any US marine. In that heat…in that humidity…. I cannot imagine. AND YOU HAVE ADHD?? I don’t know if it’s built up tolerance, sheer commitment or both but truly I bow to you. Or maybe I just have a sweaty head. I had to wear a wig once on a hot day in L.A. and I was so fucking miserable like get this thing off my head, let’s get some air on this scalp!! So anyways I just want to say that all of you are super humans. Enjoy your superpower. Also if I had money I would buy you all those wigs you always say you want, not even in a weird way, you just truly have impeccable taste for wigs and you would look amazing in all of them and people who can wear wigs in heat and humidity deserve to have all the cute wigs!!!

SCREAMMMMM i had no idea where this ask was going at first 😭 this is so funny. tbh its mostly commitment bc ive been wearing wigs for like 6 yrs now nd i still get so hot i contemplate yanking it off in the car. but im too lazy to do twist outs or styles everyday so imma just be hot!!!!!!! nd youre soooooo sweet thank u thank u one day i will the wig wardrobe of my dreams and hopefully lower temps so we can stop cooking our brains underneath them like save the wig wearers please

[aroace-mako]

Hello friend🥺☀️I hope you're good in the hood! For the personal asks game: 36, 44, 91

ciara!!!! my (better) mother!!!! thank u sm for the ask, here we go:)

36: define art:

ok this is a hard one, and this is NOT gonna be a formal (or even good) definition, but i’ll do my best. i think anything that requires some level of creativity that the person who created it defines as art counts. it’s pretty broad, and i did that on purpose bc i do not vibe with people who make rules about what art can and can’t be. choreography? art!! writing? art!!! fashion? you guessed it-art!!!!

44: what was the last film you saw?

my girlfriend has an outside movie projector so we can watch stuff during covid, so last night we watched coraline (her choice, not mine-i chose enola holmes when it was my turn). i ended up liking it more than i thought though-there were a lot of important social messages in there

91: you accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. they were good, and what’s even better is that they endow you with the superpower of your choice! what is that power?

there are so many options!! but i’m gonna have to go with the ability to stop and start time (in which i am not also stopped). if we’re talking about selfish uses, i could stop time so i could procrastinate on my homework for as long as i want-my adhd ass needs this lmao. but i could also do things like steal from jeff bezos and re-distribute his wealth without anybody stopping me! i might also bring out the guillotine

sorry that was so long:(

personal asks

[serialreblogger]

what’s your top 5 fav books u seem like a well read individual with good literary opinions

!!!! thank you for asking!! though mmmmmm i’m honoured that you think this of me, but the last book i read was a 100k fanfiction about lesbian cowboys so like. depends what you mean by “good literary opinions” 

(i do recommend that fanfic tho. it’s v well-written and you don’t need to know anything about the original content to enjoy it)

in terms of Actual Books?? jeez I haven’t had to list my favourites in a while! they’ve definitely changed so this will be educational for me as well

1. Red, White, and Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston. While we’re on the subject of fanfics, this one’s got every conceivable delightful trope in it. Son of the President (who is not Trump, I can’t stress enough, but a democrat and a woman from Texas) falls in love with the British prince (also not the real British prince, just in case you were curious). We’ve got some mutual pining, some enemies-to-friends-to-lovers, somehow fake dating and secret dating both at once, trapped-together-in-a-closet-full-of-UST, you name it. Plus this book’s super readable and very well-written. I smiled the whole way through except for the parts where I cried, and at the end I did both. DO recommend. 

2. Dreadnought by April Daniels. In a world like ours but with more superpowers, a trans girl unexpectedly inherits the powers and name of the most famous hero. EXTREMELY good, but more pain involved than the first one, and the smiles are harder-won (but when they come they are TRIUMPHANT). I would die for Danny. 

3. Dracula by Bram Stoker. Now for something completely different, a classic rife with latent homophobia and sexism! But I love it because it’s a gripping read (at least to me, but then my ADHD has been hyperfixating on this book for the past five years, so I might be skewed in its favour here), and an EXCELLENT example of unreliable narrator and sketch main characters. I always feel like some unholy cross between an archeologist and a private detective reading it. Did Mina and Jonathan kill their employer for his money? What’s going on between Seward and Van Helsing? Is Dracula really the villain? Is he even real?? So many questions, I have fun trying to answer them. Also, vampires are cool and Quincy is hot.

4. Lord of the Rings by JRR Tolkien. Of course, that’s a given. I’ll be the first to acknowledge its flaws, but it’s just such a rich story. Like, reading it is a challenge because Tolkien, but it’s also so... idk, rhythmic? It’s slow but in my mind that’s almost a virtue. If you can get in the mindset for it--extreme patience, bordering on entishness--it’s truly delightful. A meditative experience, if you will. Not to mention: it has Sam Gamgee.

5. Once Upon A Marigold by Jean Ferris. A story with everything but the kitchen sink, spiritual successor to The Princess Bride (the movie, at least; it has significantly less nihilism than The Princess Bride book does). The main character is a boy named Christian who was raised by a troll in a cave full of crystals, who falls in love with the misfit princess Marigold across the river, and it just gets wilder from there. It’s a fun read, technically a kid’s book but I still enjoy it at 22, full of delightful imagery and delicious twists that aren’t necessarily unpredictable, but certainly are entertaining. I had to include a childhood classic somewhere in this list, and this one’s it.

Honorable mentions go to William Shakespeare, Victor Hugo, and Blue Balliett (if you haven’t read Chasing Vermeer or Hold Fast, i highly recommend you do), and if we’re counting poets I’m partial to Byron (disaster mentally ill bisexual, spiritual twin) and Keats (finally a good man who was also a good poet).

[teeheeadhd]

hello

im getting a couple of complaints or additions of people talking about one of my last post. i said something about my adhd making me feel powerful!! but i feel like i should clear it up a little bit.

my adhd has always been relevant in my life. it is constantly there. i live WITH it. it is in me. for my whole life ive always felt like it is a bad thing, y’know? i was always talking TOO loudly and getting scolded for that. i could never sit still to read in school and fun story in fifth grade i started pacin around the class as we had our silent reading time because the exercise helped me to focus!! it worked, but after a few weeks my teacher said that i couldn’t do it anymore because it was “distracting my classmates”. i was and still am scolded for getting off track (kinda like how i did right there). i was always scolded for moving too much. talking too fast. speaking out of turn. having these unnecessary and ANNOYING impulse issues. having my adhd has never been fun!! my mind works too fast for everyone else, and IM the one getting blamed for it, even though that’s just how ive been born.

then it actually started to hit me man. even though i think faster than everyone and it is FRUSTRATING,,,, im still a fucking GOD that has the ability to THINK FASTER THAN EVERYONE.

Can I turn this superpower off? Never. Does it get so tiring to the point where I wanna cry? Absolutely!!

Still, I wanted to give myself props, because although this is difficult to deal with sometimes, i don’t have a choice right now. And gosh damnit if i want to claim my power as Chase from lab rats being able to move things with my mind (just a joke. i can’t actually. please laugh.) then i FUCKING WILL!

I’m not sure who actually stayed around to read this whole thing, but if you did you should know that you can THINK FASTER THAN THESE PEASANTS THAT SURROUND US. AND I BOW DOWN TO YOU.

thank u for reading!!

[gavetawrtes]

on a scale of 1-10, how excited are you about life right now? hmmmmmm

describe yourself in a hashtag? #cancelled

if you could do a love scene with anyone, who would it be? david harbour obviously pls also it has to be in an r-rated movie so it can be truly enjoyed and replayed in my memory forever

what’s one thing people don’t know about you? my gender usually akdljska

what’s your wake up ritual? jump out of bed scared and sweaty bc i was probably having a nightmare

what’s your go to bed ritual? fall a sleep in my chair while watch youtube videos, somehow end up in my bed ??

what’s your favorite time of day? dusk

your go to for having a good laugh? gus johnson

what’s the biggest surprise you’ve ever had? its a bad thing so i’m not sharing bc i don’t wanna bring the mood down

heels or flats/sneakers? boots

vintage or new? vintage vibes~~

who do you want to write your obituary? someone with a sense of humor that can make my ghost laugh

style icon? the things that a divorced dad would wear are what i usually base my clothing choices on

what are three things you cannot live without? david harbour content, food probably, a good drink ( i’m an alcoholic, leave me alone. ) 

what’s one ingredient you put in everything? cream cheese. it’s the best thing any man has ever made, you cowards

what 3 people living or dead would you want to make dinner for? david harbour, my friend c, and my friend eli and my friend scarlet ( i choose four fight me ) ( also probably they would get food poisoning or else they would have to dine fancy burgers bc that’s all i can make. ) 

window or aisle seat? window

what’s your current tv obsession? narcos !!!! holy shit its so good 

favorite app? probably some of those [ insert place ] idle. i have played like all of them literally

how would you define yourself in three words? dumbass, horny and a little problematic

favorite piece of clothing you own? that one hawaiin shirt that lets everyone know i like women

a must have clothing item that everyone should have? boots. everyone just looks better in boots. this is an objective fact. fight me

a superpower you would want? mind control. i would be the worse villain

what’s inspiring you in life right now? the monster energy drink i’m having rn

best piece of advice you’ve received? be who you are and say what you mean because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind

best advice you’d give your teenage self? sex and alcohol are not the same as therapy pls go to a doctor; also you have adhd, knowing that will change everything

a book everyone should read? the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy. no reason really its just fun. people should have more fun

what would you like to be remembered for? being david harbour’s prettiest girlfriend or or wagner moura’s prettiest girlfriend 

how do you define beauty? ' Beauty is terror. Whatever we call beautiful, we quiver before it.” ‘ that whole ass chapter btw ?? Donna Tartt wrote it for me personally and no one else

best way to take a rest/decompress? have sex 

favorite place to view art? from my computer screen hmm love me some distance

if your life was a song, what would the title be? relationships are extremely complicated and i think my dog knows it ( that’s a real song btw sdklfjalk it’s in portuguese tho )

if you could master one instrument, what would it be? guitar

if you had a tattoo, what would it be? ' a partir desta data, aquela mágoa sem remédio, é considerada nula e sobre ela — silêncio perpétuo’ which kinda means ‘from this point on, that pain for which there is no remedy, is considered null and void, and about it — perpetual silence’ 

dolphins or koalas? dolphins bc i’ve been told that i laugh like them

what’s your spirit animal? this kinda feels like a problematic question

what’s your favorite board game? zombiecide

what’s your favorite color? pale blue

least favorite color? no such thing

diamond or pearls? diamonds

drugstore makeup or designer? whatever i can find faster so i can leave the store

coffee or tea? coffeeeee

dark chocolate or milk chocolate? dark chocolate

stairs or elevators? elevators

summer or winter? winter

you are stuck on an island, you can pick one food to eat forever without getting tired of it, what would you eat? pizza. just change the toppings ;)

a dessert you don’t like? paçoca

a skill you’re working on mastering? telling people to fuck off when they hurt me

best thing to happen to you today? i got a new plot with a friend i love very much :) also i headcanoned a lot with another friend i love very much :)

worst thing to happen to you today? i got anxious bc i have to lseep in like 1 hour

favorite smell? its like one specific fragrance of one specific perfume that my parents wore in one specific vacation and its like my only happy childhood memory; also cotton candy

hugs or kisses? kisseesss

if you made a documentary, would it be about? why are people Like That

last piece of content you consumed that made you cry? sdklfja this is so dumb but okay like i was watching extraction and david harbours character died and i know that he was bad in the movie and he had a total of 9 minutes of screen time but i’m emotionally attached and i can’t see him suffer okay ?? so yes that made me cry

lipstick or lipgloss? hmmm none

sweet or savory? sweet

girl crush? that one teacher that works in my department but never spends any time in the teachers room. please step on me with those heels thanks

how do you know you’re in love? i think about them and my heart skips a beat and i go skfjsdlkjfdsklj

a song you can listen to on repeat? anything from zimbra

if you could switch lives with someone for a day, who would it be? .........david harbour’s girlfriend. listen leAVE ME ALONE I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE THINKING BUT I 

what are you most excited for/about this time in your life? c’s birthday

tagged by: @dancsmiths tagging: @scarlet i forgot your url but if you see this its u @estelasrps

[inkskinned]

Any advice to other writers?

yes. it is this: stop listening to advice.

in 2nd grade my advice was stop writing. i’m an adhd cuban kid writing bad poetry, trembling when i raise my hand in public. i get my first (and only) award at this age, when my colorblind self sees a picture incorrectly and writes a poem about the muddiness a toad sits in, where everyone else sees colors, blossoming.at 15 you will not win awards. nor at 16, or 20, or 23. 

but if this is your heart and soul, you will keep writing. because it doesn’t matter. it doesn’t matter if 215,000 people read your writing, or just 3. what matters is that you write, in margins of papers you lose, in the edges of moleskins you burn, on your exposed skin. you write and write and write until you are drained of it. but you are never, not really, drained of it. in the meantime, i learned grammar so specifically i could teach it, so teach it i did, in a better way than i ever learned it. i explained: there, their, and they’re are easy to remember. there has “here” in it, which makes it regarding times or places. their has a little person in the form of “i” in it. that’s about you or other people. “they’re” is the easiest because the apostrophe means “they are”. and that’s the end of things. “breath” and “breathe” are different but related things, when you take a breath, you swallow the “e”, to breathe means you rEleasE the ending. 

and then i crushed it under a boot. a lot of people asked me: how come. but the how is easy. the lower case and all my lack of punctuation and things. i knew the rules and broke them because it was the thing to do. bc it felt weird to talk in a fake way, u know? like i was lying.

so i told the truth. while i talked about superpowers or magic or anything fake. i told the truth. and that’s what makes it real, isn’t it. that we look for the honesty of a moment. nobody says “hey how are you doing?” “oh, i’m fine, how about you?” unless they’re being fake. two friends say “what’s up?” the other says “i’m dead inside fuck you.” 

and you watch. i watch with big eyes. i observe. i know how people talk to each other, how they move in the world. so when she glides through the doors, people turn and look at her. so that blurting isn’t just blurting, it’s meant with uncertainty. so that things have meaning.

people ask me: how come your dialogue is so good? and the truth is: i cheat. i say it out loud, and think: does this flow? does it rest? does it sound like two people talking? “how is that going” “here is exposition about my being a spy i was once in the Russian army” doesn’t sound friendly. two people being like “how’s that vent crawling going?” “oh, you know, lovely, i’m belly-flat and hungry” sounds much more lovely. this is how you fit in character development. i almost never do it without spoken word. why say “she was mad about her past” when i can say “oh, you know, lovely, i’m belly-flat and hungry, but like, you know, they carved out my insides, so, like, extra room, thanks, you fuckers,” works twice as well.

and then i throw it out. people say “here’s a list of words that replace said” so i write a story where people only use said, and it works, because the narrator’s voice is strong enough it carries it on through the universe. and i throw out commas. and i throw out quotation marks. i use whatever i think the words need. and i move forwards.

i think what writers should be afraid of the most is stagnation. not agents or how the audience will take them or how the world will scoop up words or anything. just the healthy fear of constantly rewriting the same thing in different words. that’s the true fear. and this isn’t to say that you can’t write about the same emotions or people. but everything should be a new exploration into a concept. kind of a tall order. 

so i’ll say this. who gives a shit. if you spend 4 years writing a love poetry blog to your significant other, he still ends up hating your poetry. if you write to the wrong person, you feel stupid and numb, endless. in a bad way, i mean.

so write for yourself, always. who cares about notes. i write dumb shit all the time. write because it’s the only thing worth doing. write because people told you to stop.

people ask me all the time “how did you do that!” but the truth is all you need to do is look at the number of posts. at the end of six thousand, you find a way around your land. 

and you find your voice. and that’s all that matters, in the end.

[vanmccannonlyfans]

hellraiser, scream, carrie and us!

hellraiser: do u have any tattoos/piercings? do u want any?

yes and yes 💉

scream: what’s ur favorite movie?

how could i ever pick just one!

carrie: if u could have any superpower, what would u pick?

material manipulation/conjuration would be the most useful but invisibility would be the most fun 😶‍🌫️

us: if u could change one thing about urself, what would it be?

i wish i wasn't a procrastinator/so easily distracted! there's so much i could do but i get derailed by the tiniest things. i need to get evaluated for adhd 😶

thank youuuuu 🔮

🔪horror movie asks⚰️

[wdbwotv]

i was tagged by @slampoety and forgot until just now but. thank u!!! <3

Rules: Answer the questions, add one of your own, and tag one person for every question. 1. COKE OR PEPSI: coke 2. DISNEY OR DREAMWORKS: disney (i've literally seen. them all lmao) 3. COFFEE OR TEA: coffee 4. BOOKS OR MOVIES: movies!! i love books but i can’t really read them anymore bc adhd 5. WINDOWS OR MAC: mac 6. DC OR MARVEL: my gut reaction is marvel but i don’t really like either 7. XBOX OR PLAYSTATION: xbox bc that’s what i have idk 8. DRAGON AGE OR MASS EFFECT: mass effect!!

9. NIGHT OWL OR EARLY RISER: early riser i guess? i hate getting up really early but i can’t sleep past like 10 at the absolute latest 10. CARDS OR CHESS: cards 11. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA: vanilla 12. VANS OR CONVERSE: vans 13. LAVELLAN, TREVELYAN, CADASH, OR ADAAR: idk what this means but my friend just told me it’s from dragon age 14. FLUFF OR ANGST: a good mixture of both is ideal 15. BEACH OR FOREST: forest 16. DOGS OR CATS: both!! 17. CLEAR SKIES OR RAIN: rain tbh 18. COOKING OR EATING OUT: eating out 19. SPICY OR MILD FOOD: spicy :^) 20. HALLOWEEN/SAMHAIN OR SOLSTICE/YULE/CHRISTMAS: christmas 21. WOULD YOU RATHER FOREVER BE A LITTLE TOO COLD OR A LITTLE TOO HOT: ummm too cold? probably 22. IF YOU COULD HAVE A SUPERPOWER WHAT WOULD IT BE: time travel or shapeshifting 23. ANIMATION OR LIVE ACTION: live action 24. PARAGON OR RENEGADE: paragon who do u think i am 25. BATH OR SHOWER: shower 26. TEAM CAP OR TEAM IRONMAN: like..... i don’t care but cap 27. FANTASY OR SCI-FI: mmm both idk! 28. DO YOU HAVE 3 OR 4 FAVORITE QUOTES IF SO WHAT ARE THEY: literally......... my brain is dead and the only thing in it is that one part of africa by toto 29. YOUTUBE OR NETFLIX: youtube bc that’s where monster factory is

30. HARRY POTTER OR PERCY JACKSON: harry potter 32. STAR WARS OR STAR TREK: listen. both. 33. PAPERBACK BOOKS OR HARDCOVER BOOKS: paperback bc i’m poor 34. FANTASTIC BEASTS OR CURSED CHILD: neither 35. ROCK OR POP MUSIC: umm rock i guess? but i like both 36. WHAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN YOUR LIFE: emily @kyousaya bc she just bought me chicken nuggets 37. THE LAST BOOK YOU READ/THE ONE YOU’RE CURRENTLY READING: the last book i read like all the way through was the raven king during the summer i think? i’m not reading a book rn but i might reread romeo & juliet bc halsey made me want to 38: SONG THAT MAKES YOU SMILE/SONG THAT MAKES YOU CRY: green light and taxi cab 39. FUNNY OR SCARY MOVIES: scary usually 40. RULES ARE MADE TO BE BROKEN OR FOLLOWED: followed unless they’re shitty rules dkljsf 41. LANGUAGES YOU CAN SPEAK: english is the only language i know fluently but i know four years of high school worth of japanese, a semester of german and i’m learning latin rn if that counts lmao 42. FAVOURITE ARTIST(S) OR BAND(S): twenty one pilots, the 1975, panic! at the disco, the front bottoms, fall out boy, halsey, hayley kiyoko, troye sivan............ i can’t think of anything else i’m Tired wow this list is generic as hell 43. WHO LAST MADE YOU SMILE: emily 44. FAVORITE FILM(S): glsdjkf idk? rn i love moonlight, the handmaiden & moana and also room is like an all time fave. and most studio ghibli films. i love movies but i can’t think of any someone watch movies with me idk who to tag um. i’m not gonna tag anyone sorry but if u actually read this and want to do it too i tag u

[mathematicianadda]

(META) Concrete thinkers, incapable of metaphor, are gate-keeping mathematics and eroding its most powerful property: abstraction.

Earlier today, I posted about the fascinating similarity between fractals and logarithmic functions. Though it stated in the first line that it resided in the conceptual realm, a boo-boo w/ a metaphor I used got the post flamed by a literalist. I deleted it out of cowardice. I shouldn't have. Whoops. I'm not wrong to connect the two concepts. When I get better in these fields' Algebras*, more will be written on this. But it indicated a larger problem...

​

In Lex Fridman's podcast w/ Grant Sanderson, creator of 3Blue1Brown on YouTube (link below), he discussed 3 types of mathematicians: the puzzle-solvers, the physicists (broadly speaking here...), and those who "love abstraction and the power of generality." Certainly, this list is incomplete, but in a way that proves my point here. Throughout history, the mathematical greats who invented our studies in school, the Newtons and Eulers, were *wizards* of abstraction. Evidenced not only by their discoveries - take calculus, for example; the study of the behavior of infinitesimals - but by their prolific generations in disparate domains like Great Literature. Chock-full of metaphor and analogy, these thinkers thought deeply and solved even bigger problems. Through generality, they invented the frameworks our bachelor and grad degrees. They are our revered ancestors.

​

In the early 20th century, Abstractionists like Turing, Goedel, and the analytical demigod John von Neumann, trail blazed computational science. They needed insanely computationally complicated equations solved, so dammit, they put theirs minds to work. Using what they had already grasped, broke new ground via abstraction. We're indebted to the pioneer-class. They used their heads, drawing on intuition, the pattern-recognition software innate to homo sapiens.

​

Since the mid-1970s, it seems, (though cannot be verified via a gate-keeping function known as "peer review", check out Game Theory on Wikipedia for more information) that our technological prowess, the empirical furnace that has been alight since the dawn of the 17th century, has been burnt down to embers. Occasionally, we see a noteworthy digital innovation from the Valley. But outside of the strictly IT universe, astonishingly little. We go to college, then grad school, then some PhD program to learn complicated theories about complicated things so that we can handle minutia. Everything seems disparate because each course takes the top-down approach. We start at such a high level that half the class gets 65% on the first exam and drops out. The tech- or research-bound students are starving for some application, but the semester ends before that section of the textbook is covered. It almost seems malicious. The pattern-recognition software I referred to works from the ground up. It's quite clear for those familiar with psych and neuroscience. So if we are always fed the abstraction, our grass-roots, evolved, intuitive brains have nowhere to go with it. We can't perform the abstraction on our own, as they we're not allowed to have access to that part of the toolkit. We go into the workforce with a litany of equations our brains have vaguely mapped to {insert technical field here.} Then we wind up in sales jobs to pay the bills. In Business Schools (where I come from), it's even worse. They don't even apply calculus (dare I mention stochastic calculus or Brownian motion...spooky!) in economics class until grad school because they think our tiny Microsoft Excel brains would explode. For a concrete example here, it took me three years after college to the connect the dots on 'derivative', the tool of calculus, and 'derivative' the financial security class most known for its hand in 2008.

​

In any domain, when things begin to fall into place, divergent from complexity and into alignment, we find emergent simplicity. Our ancestors called it discovery, "innovation" better fits millennial vernacular. When things continue become increasingly muddled and complex, it's called stagnation. Stagnation in the Information Age no less. As a 24-year old debating a future in an expensive and unproductive graduate program or my soul's slow death in Big Corporate, I truly hope momentum will change on this one. Lets's ask more questions, make more mistakes, make more irresponsibly logical leaps (when the downside to said leap is low), do less incremental improvement, and math the s*** out of our future. Instead of worrying about today's hyped problem like the Middle East, climate change, {pick your favorite}, perhaps we could...maybe...just maybe...solve them? Let's use this beautiful, logical, intensely rigorous toolkit we've been gifted by our ancients, MATH, to solve the problems of the future.

​

PS - Please tear apart my ideas if you'd like. But, if you flame me ad-hominem style, you're just proving my point on this...gate-keeping ruins math.

_____

* Algebra is a anglo-bastardization (hope this isn't a swearword that get's me deleted) of 'al-jabr,' meaning 'bone-setting,' literally referring to how we move the 'bones' around on paper. Thank god the Arab world kept the mathematical lamp burning throughout the European Dark Ages. Why don't the literalists explain the meaning of this word...ever? Not even in high school? Because they take things for granted and don't read.

**I didn't make the mistake of apologizing for my learning issues in this post, unlike its predecessor. If you're still reading this, you're not the type to idiotically flame something thought out Reddit-style. Many mathematical greats have had issues in the over-structured, 100 equations in 30 minutes-classroom setting. Two examples are Albert Einstein and John Nash. The former worked in a patent-office because 1900s Barvaria didn't like that he was scatter-brained (or that he was Jewish; over-structured societies are more prone to racism, also known as tribal affinity); the latter, lived his 30s thru 70s deluded by the menacing condition of Paranoid Schizophrenia. The chiding he received in elementary, secondary, and university-level academia played a significant role in his social disconnect. See Isaacson's Einstein and Nassar's A Beautiful Mind to learn more. I'm not suggesting that I possess a mind bearing an ounce of resemblance with these legends, or any others. What I am suggesting, however, is that there are at least a few greats among us who are being crowded out of our institutions, and given an "ADHD"/"Dyslexic"/"Aspergers" diagnoses for their trouble. Why do we continue to call bright kids with learning superpowers 'learning disabled'?

*** Check out Lex Fridman's phenomenal podcast. Here's the link to the episode w/ Grant Sanderson, creator of 3Blue1Brown; one of the few who understand the power of intuition in mathematics.

https://lexfridman.com/grant-sanderson/

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