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katcoquette · 2 years

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Almost There

Reuben "Payback" Fitch x Reader

part of my cabin in the woods collection happening throughout the month of october- a collection of stand-alone* stories (cute fall & spooky) set in the same cabin in the woods, read them all if you dare uncover the full mystery...

summary: the drive up to the cabin you've rented for the weekend is uneventful, until you can't shake a dreadful feeling for the rest of the night.

✦ word count: 2.8k

✦ tw/tags: 🕷 spooky spider out of 5, sense of impending doom, weird feelings, ghost sighting, driving through a forest at night, nausea

✦ author's note: the amusement park in my town rates their haunted houses out of 5 pumpkins or whatever so I'm gonna do the same for the spooky half of this collection, five spider scale 🕷🕷🕷🕷🕷 meaning I was so scared while writing this I almost shit myself when my dog opened my bedroom door & 🕷 meaning just a little spooky, might give you a little shiver

The evening had died down enough that even the stragglers had finally made their exit, leaving you and your family to sit in the satisfying silence that came at the end of a successful event.

Streamers, glitter, and ring-shaped souvenirs were scattered around the floor- remnants of the celebration that had come together, through no small feat of your own, in less than a week after your baby sister’s proposal.

“Well that was fun.” Your brother interrupts the silence to comment. “Yeah, it was.” Your sister confirms, giggling with her new fiancée from where they were sprawled across the couch.

You smile at their interaction, snuggling further into your boyfriend’s arms as the conversation about the night continues. You’re close to falling asleep when you feel Payback shift.

“We should probably get going.” He says softly, kissing the top of your head. You almost groan, but pry yourself up anyway- he was right. You stretch your arms back, trying to wake yourself up, and then you offer him a hand to pull him up.

“You headed out?” Your sister notices and stands up to say goodbye to you both.

She hugs Payback first, “Thank you for coming.”

“Of course. Congratulations again.”

She smiles at him, and then turns to you, pouting as she holds out her arms.

“Thank you for putting this together for us. It was such a fun night.” She’s teary-eyed when she pulls away, and you pout back at her, pinching her cheek. “Of course, honey. There’s no one else I’d rather be planning a wedding for.”

You say goodbye to the rest of your family, and your mom walks you to the door. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay the night? Go up in the morning?”

“We’ll be alright, Mom. It’s only an hour from here.” You kiss her cheek. Payback’s hand is resting on your lower back as you walk out the front door. “Thanks for having me, Mrs. Y/L/N. It’s always great to see you.”

“It’s our pleasure, Reuben. You’re welcome anytime, even without our daughter!” He laughs, promising to take your mother up on her offer at some point. You don’t doubt that he will.

“Parent-pleaser.” You mutter as soon as the front door closes. He slings his arm over your shoulder, walking you down the driveway. “One of us has to be.”

“Hey!”

He chuckles, then changes the subject. “Want me to drive?”

“Yes please. I don’t think I can mentally handle trying to get us to the cabin.” He fishes your keys out of your front pocket, giving you a quick kiss in the process. “I figured. You’ve had a long work week.”

He unlocks the car and opens the passenger door for you, closing it once you’ve dragged your legs inside.

“It was a fun long though, for the most part.”

“The party tonight was fantastic; you really did a great job.”

It’s close to midnight by the time the two of you manage to pull out of your parents’ driveway and get on the road. He intertwines one hand with yours over the middle console, the other firmly holding the wheel.

The radio plays softly in the background as you settle into the drive. You catch yourself yawning, and, having decided that you weren’t going to sleep and leave him alone, you shift in your seat, sitting up straighter.

“Tired?” He glances over at you with a smile.

You rub the back of his hand with your thumb, returning it. “A little bit. Are you?”

“Nah, I’m doing good.”

“You apologized to everyone about us being late right?”

“Your sister’s engagement party wasn’t something we were ever going to miss, but yes, I apologized anyway.”

“Okay. Good.”

He takes one hand from the steering wheel and squeezes your thigh. “You have nothing to worry about. Everyone’s gonna love you.”

“How did you know I was thinking about that?”

“Your thoughts are written all over your face, I can always tell.” You sigh, looking out the window.

You’re not convinced.

Sure, nothing to worry about- apart from this trip being with eleven of his closest friends and their own guests, and your first trip as a couple.

Exciting yes, but also, a little stressful.

“You’ll know some people there; it won’t be all strangers. And you also aren’t the only ‘new’ person in the group.”

He squeezes your hand. “And- there’s no way the entire group will still be awake when we get there, so you can meet everyone in smaller waves.” You purse your lips as you ruminate on his words.

“Annddd… you know me. I’ll be there the whole time too.” He grins, teasing you.

That causes a smile to break out onto your face. “You’re rightt.” You do feel better about it.

“God you’re good at pep talks.”

“I know.”

You occupy the next forty minutes with random discussions and upbeat music. The roads narrow to one lane and start to wind around and through the twisted trunks local to the area. By the time you reach the sign announcing your official arrival to ‘Elfin Forest Recreational Reserve’, you’re feeling more awake than you have all day.

You’re in the middle of laughing at something Payback has said when you’re hit with a wave of nausea. It’s unlike anything you’ve felt before, and it happens almost instantaneously as you pass the sign.

Your head spins as you try to process it, had the curves in the road made you carsick? Suddenly, the car feels too hot, your clothing feels too tight, and the road feels too small.

You shift uncomfortably in your seat. The nausea has morphed into a different feeling- one that you’re not even sure you could describe if you tried to in this moment, but it’s heavy, dark, an overwhelming dread.

It’s worse than the nausea.

“Can you pull over?” You can barely keep your voice steady, and your hand is gripping the arm rest.

“We’re almost to the cabin, I think-”

“Pull over!” You wince at the tone of your voice, but you need to get out of the car, you must. You’re trying your best to control your behavior, but you can’t help grasping frantically for the door handle as soon as the car stops.

“Jesus- are you okay?” You barely hear your concerned boyfriend. The cool air that hits you provides some comfort, so you swing your legs out of the car and plant them on the side of the road, leaning over and resting your elbows on your thighs.

“What’s going on?” He’s leaned over the console as far as he can manage, rubbing circles into your back.

“I don’t know.”

“Do we need to call someone? I don’t know who we would call- an ambulance? Do you need an ambulance?” You focus on your breathing, squeezing your eyes shut, and whisper, “No, it’s not that bad-“

“Shit- baby, I don’t have cell service.” He hits his phone against his palm, and holds it higher- as if that will make it start to work. You’d make fun of him for it if you were in different circumstances. He’s genuinely scared and doing anything he can short of willing a cell tower to suddenly appear.

“Reu, I don’t need an ambulance.” It starts to get easier to breathe the longer you sit in the cool air, unmoving. “It’s okay- I’m okay.”

“What- are you serious?” You sit back into the passenger seat, taking a moment to mentally check over yourself. “Yeah.”

He looks at you with wide eyes, still in disbelief. “…are you sure?” You nod, more scared at your body’s outburst than anything else, because as quickly as it had descended on you, it had completely subsided.

You glance outside again, taking notice this time of a mile marker right where you’d pulled over.

Mile marker 314. Your car door is still open, and suddenly you feel an urge to close it- your mind convincing you that if you don’t close it now- something will happen.

Mile marker 314 is exactly six and a half miles from the sign. Of course, neither of you know this, nor do you know that it’s much newer than any of the other markers that dot the forest’s road- on account of it being the only one that had to be replaced.

You pull your legs back into the car and slam the door, clicking the lock immediately after.

“Let’s keep going.”

“That seemed pretty fucking serious.” You can hear a wobble in his voice, and though you’re completely freaked out by the whole thing, you’re trying not to let it show.

“I know, Reu, but I just want to get to the cabin. I’m sure it was car sickness.” His brow is still furrowed, not entirely convinced. You’re not either.

You have no other explanation, and you just want to leave the dark road.

You twist in your seat so you’re facing him, and take his hands, giving them a reassuring squeeze.

“I’m sorry for scaring you. It was just sudden, probably because of how curvy the roads are.” You move a hand to cup his cheek and kiss him. “I promise I’m okay.”

He rests his forehead against yours, searching your eyes. “Okay.” You smile softly, giving him another kiss before you sit back against the headrest.

You feel even more relief as you pull away from the side of the road, and mile marker 314.

It takes 20 more minutes to reach the gate of the cabin. You find the code in your notes, and Payback gets out of the car to punch it in. You take more deep breaths as you watch him walk around the front of the car. He must punch it in wrong the first time, because a light blinks red at the top of the box.

Your eyes wander over the landscape beyond the gate as he continues to try to get it open. The cabin was much bigger than you’d been expecting from the few pictures Payback had showed you from his group chat.

It looked nice, really nice, and from what you could see of the grounds, everything had been well-kept.

The gate finally creaks open, and you see your boyfriend jogging back to the car. “It’s really cold out there.” He comments, rubbing his hands together as you wait for the gate to open fully. “I’m glad we’re not camping.”

As you pull up the driveway, you can’t help the words that come out of your mouth, “It’s so beautiful.”

You notice movement on the roof over the entry way, and you crane your head to get a better look.

Sure enough, you see two figures stand up and walk back toward the light from a nearby window that sits behind a porch on the second floor. You can’t see who it is from the driveway, but you smile, glad that at least two people in the group would be awake to meet.

From the corner of your eye, you notice something else, so you sweep your eyes over the rest of the structure, landing on another figure.

They’re standing at the side of the house, near the edge of the woods. You freeze- as if all time has stopped around you.

You can barely make out any detail of their clothes, or features, as they’re facing away from you. But as soon as your eyes land on them, they start to turn toward you. It’s slow, and deliberate, and you’re struck with the same feeling from the road.

In your mind you beg, plead to some higher power that the figure- a woman, you can see now- not turn any further, not face you. You want to pull your eyes from the scene, but you can’t seem to will yourself to do it.

“We made it.”

Payback’s voice breaks through your mind, a savior to you in this moment, and it’s enough to break whatever trance you’d fallen into. When you turn from the window and see the excitement on his face, the dread falls away from you.

You feel relief once again.

“You ready to go in?” You blink, registering his words. You don’t dare look back to the side of the house.

“Yeah. Let’s go in.”

You meet each other at the trunk to grab your bags, and then you’re walking up the steps. The door opens, and Rooster’s head pops around the side of it. He steps back when he sees the two of you, opening it wider so you can get your bags through. “Hey! You made it.”

The familiar face smiling next to Rooster immediately calms your nerves. She steps forward and pulls you into her arms, giving you a tight hug. “Agh, I missed you!” You hear Rooster close the door and greet Payback behind you.

When you pull apart you notice her husband staring at you with the best poker face he can muster. You share a knowing glance with her, and then she elbows his side. “Oh! Uh- it’s good to see you again.”

“I’m surprised you remember the last time we met, you and Reu were prettyyy out of it.” His eyes widen as he looks to his wife for some sort of lifeline, but she just shrugs, a grimace on her face. “Think you’ve been caught, babe.”

Payback laughs, clapping him on the shoulder. “She saw right through you, man. It was a good effort though.”

“You two are the worst.” He points at them. “No help at all.”

“I did appreciate the gesture though, don’t worry.”

“Well, it’s nice to meet again anyway, I promise I’ll remember most of this trip.” He jokes, causing the rest of you to laugh.

When it dies down, you speak again, “Is anyone else around?”

They glance at each other, then both shake their heads as Rooster answers your question. “Not that we’ve seen, but we have been up on the roof.”

You hum in response.

“You two have probably had a long day, we should let you get settled. But tomorrow I want to hear all about your sister’s engagement.”

“Sounds good.” You smile at her. They give you directions and say goodnight, and then you and Payback are on your way to the unoccupied suite at the far end of the main floor.

It’s quiet as you put your bags down and start to get ready for bed, not for any other reason aside from exhaustion catching up with both of you. When you’re standing at the double sink in the bathroom brushing your teeth, you make eye contact in the mirror and smile at each other.

“Are you still feeling okay?”

You spit your toothpaste in the sink, turning on the water, and nod. “Much better now that we’re here.”

He wipes his face, and you finish up your skincare routine. “I didn’t think you got carsick.”

You rub lotion into your hands, then follow him out of the bathroom, flipping off the light. “I usually don’t- that’s why I was kind of panicking.”

He stops to face you, and pull you into his chest. “I think your panic was justified. I was panicked. That got really bad really fast.” You wrap your arms tightly around him.

“I know, I’m sorry.” He kisses the top of your head. “Don’t be. It’s not something you can control. I’m just glad you’re okay.”

You tilt your head back to look at him, and he leans down to kiss you.

“Now-“ He emphasizes the word with another kiss. “-we can get some sleep, and tomorrow we’ll really start enjoying our first trip together.” You smile.

“Sounds perfect.” He rubs your back as you pull apart to walk to the other side of the room, patting your ass when you turn.

You glance back, pursing your lips amusedly.

As you pass by the large window to get into bed, you hesitate, biting the inside of your cheek. It wasn’t lost on you as you walked through the kitchen and into another hallway that you were headed toward the side of the house closest to where you had seen…someone earlier.

And though you feel a little silly for doing it, you pull the curtain aside just enough to look out toward the woods.

Because even though, according to the Bradshaws, everyone was sleeping, and even though you don’t particularly want to feel that feeling again, you still hope the same someone is still outside- that you’ll be able to recognize them.

Because then you’ll be able to put your mind to rest.

But you don’t see anything, or anyone, out of the ordinary. There’s enough moonlight to see that the property extends all the way to the edge of the tree line, with a wooden fence to mark the separation, and that’s all.

You let the curtain fall back into place, shielding you once again from the outside world.

Maybe it was just car sickness- you hadn’t eaten enough that day. And it probably was just one of your friends in the yard- they’d gone back inside without passing through the main area of the house. You let out a decisive breath.

Yes- there was an explanation for everything. It’s what you repeat to yourself as you get into bed, turn off the lamp, and snuggle into your boyfriend’s arms.

Taglist: @imwaytootires @choochoo284 @teti-menchon0604 @hopefulinlove @phoenix1389 @littlebadariell @cycbaby @seasidh @nonsensical-nonce @dracosluvbot @army24--7 @unordinare @xoxabs88xox @alexxavicry @Itsyogurl19 @toocoldoutsideforyou @double-j @classygirlything21

#payback #payback x reader #payback fic #reuben payback fitch #rueben payback fitch x reader #tgm #tgm fic #top gun maverick #payback top gun #katescabininthewoods #I love that picture of him #he's so cute

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elphabaoftheopera · 2 years

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Hi,

Question 3, 5 9 from weird questions from writers please. 😊

Thank you thank you for the ask!

3. What is your writing ritual and why is it cursed?

Writing for me is pretty much an all or nothing thing. It's either all I want to do/can think about or I go months on end without the urge at all. Kind of like playing The Sims! Anyway, when I do have the urge to write (ding dong, I'm currently hyperfixated on a multi-chap FIyeraba WIP) I sit at my computer immediately when I get home and get all psyched. But then I can't jump straight into writing, I have to warm up a little, so why not go on tumblr for a bit? Okay I pulled myself away from tumblr, better stalk the Wicked FFnet tag for awhile and maybe read somethings. Cool, now right. No maybe I'll read my old writing. Or I'll watch source material that I'm basing information off of. Or I'll play solitaire. By then it's like 2 and a half hours later and I finally get to work on my WIP and get super into it but 45 minutes later I either have to go to work or eat dinner or go to bed and then I get really pissed because "I never have any time to really write!".

That mess is why it's cursed.

5. Do you have any writing superstitions? What are they and why are they 100% true?

It's not really a superstition, but I'm very much of the mind that I won't post a chapter fic until it is 100% done and revised to perfection (which of course won't exist). I can't post chapter by chapter because I get too paranoid that I'll want to change things and it's hard for me to release control. Also, I do let my husband read my fanfiction (which he wants to, it's very sweet) but I don't let him or ANYONE read it until it's revised to my liking. Nobody lays eyes on my unfinished drafts--to vulnerable!

9. Do you believe in ghosts? This isn’t about writing I just wanna know

So I've never seen a ghost but I really wanna believe. I think it's just more fun to believe they're real. I kind of want to see one and kind of don't. I guess I'm not 100% convinced they're real but also not 100% of the mind that they're not. Plus, I love love love spooky things and scary movies and haunted places and all of that. So ghosties are cool in my book. Hoping (and not hoping) to see some shit when I stay in a haunted winery/inn this October for my anniversary!

send me numbers between 1-40!

#ask meme #writing tag #raven-curls #i love your work thank you for asking

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lucithornz · 6 months

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Tagged by two amazing people @amoxilwrites and @scoops404 I love you both <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Under my main and pseud 12 (35 if we are counting my other account)

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

I am about to expose myself . . . Under LuciThornz it's 495,611 Combined with my other account it's . . . . 2,205,774 . . . .(don't ask lol)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

DNF and the Aurelian Cycle, a few other niche fandoms but those are the main two(other account is all Supernatural baby)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

I'm doing top 3 because I am lazy.

I'd Lie

2. Unsought is Better

3. Suffer Love

I'm so happy the series is together here!!!!

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I love responding. People take the time to say something and I love talking about my work and stuff. It's fun and I think makes the reading experience a lot more dynamic if that makes sense. As a commenter I also really like hearing back from authors, it's a lot of fun!

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

. . . . Oh we all know. Haunted Deep (iykyk) I never link that fic so if you wanna find it you have to go digging :P

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Umm probably Suffer Love, that or One Fated Thread(soulmates will make for a pretty sappy ending)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Had one person take personal issue with George's characterization in Unsought is Better, but they still demanded updates ahead of schedule(blocked). Seen a few things on Twitter and one anon, but I really don't care.

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

I do. I have written omegaverse and monster smut. It's a work in progress I'd say, I like to try to ruin smut with emotions that's my M.O lol

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

No, but one day I'll write a dnf Supernatural crossover fic

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge, and it better stay that way. There's a very good reason I'm good at writing enemies to lovers.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Nope

14. What's your all-time favourite ship

Destiel until the end of time!!! Sorry I love dnf too but the angel that changed the course of the entire universe for one man is more important. But yeah DNF, also Samifer, Daemon/Rhaenyra, Power/Annie(my beloved Aurelian Cycle ship) also Will/Emma Swan(literally never gets old)

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

None, I am a completionist to a fault. Now you have to be nice to me if you want to see the finished work, but I finish all my shit.

16. What are your writing strengths?

You all better tell me, the only thing I know I'm good at is angst.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Smut, sometimes I feel very shaky on characterization for some characters, and fluff(I am trying my best here people I promise)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Don't see the point, unless the character can't speak the language and doesn't understand also, but then just say they can't understand. I don't see the point unless it's elvish in LOTR I need that shit.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Wheel of Time/Supernatural. It was almost simultaneous. I gained access to Tumblr and went wild.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

I hate it till it's done, but it will be I'd Lie, until then Suffer Love gets the top spot

Thanks for tagging me, Scoops and Vesp! This was fun! Scoops tagged most people I would have, and I am very tired, so if you see this and want to play consider yourself tagged!

#tag game #do not ask about the other account you will not find it :P

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ameliasbitvh · 3 years

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ahhhh! thank you all soso much for the 300 followers! i just hit 200 last week?! how are there 300 of you? i honestly don’t know, but i started this account as a place to just read smut and then i decided to post on here. the reason why my first post was angst was because i was being a slut for angst to feel something in those few moments- okay i’ll stop myself right there. for this milestone i’m going to do mutual appreciation for the moots i’ve interacted with the most so far! (if we’re moots and u wanna interact pls do, i’m not scary!)

okayy first up,

@underappreciated-spoon-321

i love you so much bby, i could not believe it when you followed me. i was legit crying happy tears and i specifically remember you followed me after i posted “needy” random lol.

your writing is immaculate, absolutely lovely. ur smut *chefs kisses* i love that you put up with my shit photos that i send you and that you actually ask for more- but it baffled me when you first interacted with me, this was my reaction

*deep breath* “omfg! (ur username) just interacted with me, wtf do i do?!” also ur nick name reminds me of belly from dear, draco.

i’m not writing a lot, bc for your sleepover i wrote you a damn paragraph 😭 but i love u sm belly!! 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

@dracoskinks

ARI! i love talking to you, bc i can talk about anything and when i say anything i mean anything. like kinks, porn, random draco scenarios, etc… you are one of the funniest people i have seen on this app.

ur blunt and funny at the same time, it just makes it more fun to talk to you. ur smut is soso good, bc i don’t find a lot of smut with a dom!reader and sub!draco.

i remember you followed me, so out of curiosity i checked out your blog and saw your piss kink fic and that did it for me. after that i followed you back and we became moots ajnwja. when ur first account got terminated you scared me so fucking much, because i thought you were going to leave tumblr forever. don’t. ever. play. like. that. again. i’m glad we became moots bc i fucking love you <3

@opalsheart

I LOVE YOU SM! i think u were the first moot that i interacted with in direct messages, bc you had tea to spill, and ever since than we’ve been #4lifers. you send me edits and hate on t*m felton with me on instagram. you were the first mutual to know what i looked like lmaoo. u r an absolute goddess, bestie, like what- i know that you can pull anyone you want, so stop playing when you talk about someone.

even though we have a fucking 12 hour time difference, we still find time to talk to each other. it is so fun talking with you and the fact that when we talk it’s night for one of us. you let me send that stupid tik tok of ed sheeran and t*m felton to you and it probably haunts your dreams now ajnwajsj-

i appreciate that you study ur MF ass off for your exams, bc i could never. and you even send me those cute memes when i wake up- also we better be watching those true crime documentaries, bc i’m still waiting. idc if we have a time difference :) anyways ILY SM ELLIE !! <3

@laceycallisto

okay- where do i even get started with this. we first interacted when i reblogged that draco fan fic and we reblogged talking about how desperate we were trying to find that iconic fic. and i forgot that the creator could see all the reblogging we were doing- you texted me directly about adding my name into your tags, which obviously i agreed to. then we just started talking about random shit like how we were superior because we were june geminis. or how we talked about being in love with remus lupin.

i have vivid flash backs of how your remus fic hurt me. i cried my false lashes off proof reading janajaj- bestie- you’ve seen me cry ajnwja- your writing is ethereal, i don’t know how you can see that? your so nice too, like girly u gave me ur netflix within like a day of knowing each other 💀 we watched bridgerton in two mother fucking sittings. we ate that bridgerton hoe up!

all ur input on the scenes were so funny like the “with child” and “dicking” comments 😭 i love how it’s so easy to talk to you about everything, like how dumb i am- even talking about the privilege of being poc and not burning in the sun. bruh u even let me tag u in dumb tik tok videos, like what?! and i think your the only mutual i have that’s in the same time zone as me… also we better binge the next season. but ily sm, ur like my older sister, even if u say ur life is shitty 😭 <3

@dracomalfoys-wh0re

honestly, kacia. i owe a lot to you for my account being “found” or whatever, bc you reblogged a fic of mine, i’m pretty sure it was “common room” and that’s when i started getting notes and followers najajwjwj- you might not know that but i do 💀 i will forever remember that.

you literally were one of the first accounts ever- to follow me. and i won’t lie, i went crazy when u followed me because i love your fics so much! you are so funny and blunt too i swear 😭

and can we talk about your tom riddle fic? like?!the fact that you really showed tom’s true personality and character. every world had me enthralled further into the fic, the way you wrote him is exactly how i think tom riddle would act towards his s/o. his toxicity and gaslighting is too accurate.

moving on from the discussion of your fic, which is amazing, ily sm babe!!

@yoooespinosa

we’ve interacted a few times and when u texted me directly saying that you thought i was sweet, i literally went, “omg- people think i’m sweet” in a good way, not bad jkwajjw- can i just get started on your writing, because oh. my. fucking. god. it is the most captivating and heart breaking thing i’ve ever seen- the emotions that you put into every word completes the entire fic. every angst piece that you have written, made me cry or made something inside me just twist with sadness. it is truly lovely and magnificent.

how do ur fics not get thousands of notes? because everyone should see what you write, it’s unfair that others haven’t seen your fics. when u explained your dream to me, i swear you practically wrote a whole fic 😭

i remember u said that you wanted to do a face reveal, but we’re scared. bestie what are you scared of? you look like an ANGEL!! and if anyone were to disagree, they are obviously blind. but ily bestie <3

@o-rion-sta-r

BESTIE BAE ORION i love you so much!interacting with you is honestly so fun. and i remember like literally yesterday we were trying to figure out ari’s time zone and we were freaking out. you, ari, and me all have a fucking time difference 😭 it sucks so much!

at least every day you ask me how my days been and i think that’s so sweet, because before i got on tumblr people didn’t ask that question. i appreciate that you ask me that and just random questions in general, because i love interacting with you so much. and you should start writing bby! i will reblog anything you write, also ily sm <3

@ilygw

we don’t talk a lot, but you seem like a fun person! i love seeing all the edits you post on here, bc honestly i need more ferret boy content. i know there is a lot, but i feel like i’ve seen all of them. until i see you posting a new edit and i’m like, “okay… i guess i haven’t seen every draco edit” but that’s all i have lol, ly!!

@arcaneslut

to be honest, you seemed so intimidating to me. i know you said you’re not, but to me you seemed really scary even though i knew you weren’t 😭 i just interacted with you recently and you are so sweet i swear! i love all ur fics, especially “and then i felt nothing” because when i read this fic you better believe i was crying so hard- to the point where i couldn’t breath- everything was written so beautifully, i couldn’t believe it.

i love how one thing we share in common is losing our phones 💀 but i just wanted to say thank you for explaining the whole sleepover and celebration things to me! even tho we just started interacting i already love u!!

moots bc i’m in love with all of them: @just-a-smol-spoon @dreamy-clousds @dracoskinks @unedibledaisyduck @thatsassyhufflepuff @a-aexotic @l0vely-lupin @gothboutique @wolfstar4lifee @littlemissnoname13 @deatthfairy @arcaneslut @ladyvesuvia @laceycallisto @dracossweetprincess @the-lonely-poet-loves-to-weep @realityblocked @harmqnia @yoooespinosa @opalsheart @lilscloud @cupids-crystals @mellifluousart @lunas-kisses @malfoysmainb @klauscarolove @crystxlss @beforeoursunsets @marrymetheonott @queeriacs @electriclocean @dlmmdl @o-rion-sta-r @sfdlm @ilygw @desiredmalfoy @underappreciated-spoon-321 @draco-and-tom @hellounicorn @mugglesthesedays @dracomalfoys-wh0re

if i didn’t tag u it’s bc i can’t tag more than 50 blogs :(

#eve’s 300 moot appreciation

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alwaysthrowsscissors · 3 years

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Fic Writer Questions!

Thanks for the tag @venhedish dont mind if I do darlin'! Loved reading your answers too!

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

17 and I started May 2020

2) What's your total AO3 word count?

84,430! Sooooo close to that 100k milestone I just need to get off my writing hiatus since I have a beefy one shot WIP and a couple kink-meme prompt fills started that will get me to the finish line!

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

On Ao3/as an adult, just Supernatural.

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Well Jung – This was my first and I’m still super surprised it took off so well considering all the head-hopping. I also hadn’t written fiction since high school so it’s pretty technically rough!

I Can’t Forget the Time and Place Where We Just Met – Who doesn’t love a good old-fashioned double amnesia fic! This was a SPN Masquerade fill and it was super fun to write!

Kiss the Cook – Another SPN Masquerade fill inspired by Dean in an apron in S15. Kitchen fucking is fun fucking!

Iodine and Stitches – 3/5 SPN Masquerade fills that I did fall 2020. Seriously such a fun event to participate in I cant recommend it enough. This is one my only fics with a serious tone throughout which is tough for this clown.

Double Jeopardy – Written for my buddy after finding out she has an intelligence kink! Cut to us giggling about Sam losing his damn mind when he plays Jeopardy with clever Dean!

5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Listen…I can’t fully express how much comments give me LIFE! I want to know what you liked about my silly musings, I want to know your fav part, I want to know that I gave you a boner! I'll take a button smash, I'll take an emoticon. Anything, everything! I make a point to always respond back to show my appreciation for people taking time out of their day to make my day.

6) What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

Without a shadow of a doubt Yesterday Don’t Matter if It’s Gone about what would happen if Sam and Dean hooked up during Mystery Spot and exacerbated Sam’s downward spiral during the months of Tuesdays. I write a lot of humour and this sucker is humourless PLUS has an unhappy ending! Weeee!

8) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you've written?

Never have but not opposed to the idea.

9) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Nope, I’ve been pretty fortunate but I also write pretty tame shit. So if I start dabbling more in the archive warnings it may change. I do have a fun multichap wincestiel non-con WIP in the works 😈

10) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

AHAHAHAHAHA I’d say a good 90-95% of my 84k wordcount is smut! All M/M all explicit! Fun times over at Casa Scissors 😏. I do have some upcoming stuff that’s more plot heavy though which I’m looking forward to.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I fucking hope not that would be a big bummer.

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! And as a noob I had to pinch myself, it still fucking blows my mind! A lovely Ao3 user Yigelulu translated I Can’t Forget the Time and Place Where We Just Met into Chinese. It was so incredibly cool to see my words in another language and a great honour that they liked my fic enough to put in all that work!

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yup! Turn Your Head and Cough with my budbud Wearingdeantoprom. Dean gets his prostate rubbed for the first time at the doctors office.

14) What's your all time favorite ship?

Wincest wincest all the wincest! My brain is infected and there is no cure! I am a pro-shipper though ship and let ship my dudes. I also dabble in wincestiel and LOVE any combination of winkline and may write it one day. I don’t really read much from other fandoms. I’ve read some George/Fred (I like brother fucking ok?) and I love me some Jess Mariano/Dean Forester over in the Gilmore Girls camp (the perfect enemies to lovers) but its unfortunately such a small ship. Any souls reading this who like those ships, please drop any recs into my box!

15) What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

Anything I am passionate about I will finish. I’ve only killed one thing because I got bored with it but I posted my fav part for a fic challenge. I hate not having something to show for my spent time (I know it's a hobby but it's the principle damnit!) and I hate unfinished things. Those damn little ao3 red circles haunt me 🚫

16) What are your writing strengths?

Christ uhhh I’ll say I’m most consistently praised in comments for my dialogue and it’s what always flows the smoothest for me. I think my humour is also a strength, it comes very naturally when I write which is why I have a hard time keeping it out of my fics! Times are tough I just wanna make y’all giggle ok?

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

Frankly, my greatest weakness is that I don’t take it seriously enough to look at my past writing critically for improvement. I also write (non-fiction) for my job and had extensive training to do so, so when its for this hobby I honestly whip it out, edit a couple times, and slap it up ‘good enough’ styles and I don’t go back to re-read once posted. I think if I looked back, I could see lots of opportunities for improvement and could go from a fine writer to a good writer. I’d also say that I’ve written pretty fun fluffy cracky smutty stuff so I guess another weakness is a lack of depth of plot and subject matter. I do want to explore this stuff more though.

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

My concern is if you don’t speak the language fluently, then native speakers reading your fic might feel a big disconnect if you get colloquialisms and euphemism etc. incorrect. It could take them out of your fic if its not authentic enough. I don’t speak any other language fluently so it would END BADLY. I can speak and read French VERY POORLY and that’s it so no, I will never write in another language unless its jibberish I invented myself!

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

The only fanfic I wrote before SPN last year was a handful of super cracky, gen Gundam Wing fanfiction in high school!! They are on a broken USB stick which kills me I want to read them so badly! All my other creative writing was original fiction mainly horror/thrillers. I stopped when I started my undergrad cause...that shit is a lot of work yo.

20) What's your favorite fic you've written?

My first love is my first baby Well Jung. I love the plot, I love the humour in it, I love the heart, and it’s still some of my fav sex I’ve written. And the title makes me giggle too who doesn’t love a bad pun? I'm so thrilled it was so successful but it would still be my favourite even if 3 people read it. It made me rediscover writing as a hobby and helped me explore this wonderful (yet insane) fandom. I love all my babies and I even think the writing is stronger in other fics, but he will always be #1 in my heart.

OK this was fun I love talking about fic writing! If any of you read my stuff and want to know more, hit me with an ask; I love making new frans! Tagging @oddsocksandstuff @samanddeaninpanties @raidens-realm I think my other writer mutuals have been tagged by Ven!

#ask game #about me #fanfic writing #spn fanfiction #my writing

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a-bang-for-your-bucky · 3 years

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Playin' With Fire: Frankie's Secret

Playin’ With Fire: Frankie’s secret

Summary: Dani and Frankie have been friends for almost two years now. While at a party, Dani learns Frankie’s darkest secret. Will their friendship surpass this hurdle? WIll they finally cross that line they have been teetering on? Or will this be the wedge that drives them apart?

Warnings: DRUG USE (straight up use of cocaine), ANGST (It starts it off), explicit language, a heated make out session, implication of smut (but no details because I suck at writing smut), Hurt!Frankie because it breaks my heart. I hurt my own heart writing this.

Pairings: Dani x Frankie, Frankie x ofc, Dani x Santiago

Word Count: 4,280

A/N: Part 2! Y'all this story is a wild ride. I am not responsible for any tears that are shed while reading this.

Tags: @221bshrlocked @danniburgh (if you want to be tagged, LMK)

It wasn’t often that Dani went to a party that wasn’t being hosted by a Miller brother. Yet, here she was at some random house with a lot of random people. Will said it would be fun, that she needed to relax. Benny said that she wouldn’t be alone because Frankie would be there. So how in the hell did she find herself standing around with none of the guys in sight?

Dani wandered aimlessly through the crowd of people, looking for someone she knew. She came across a door, and it seemed to be quiet on the other end. She quickly turned the knob to see that it was unlocked. Pushing the door open, she revealed her best friend, with a half naked brunette in his lap, snorting what looked like coke.

Her heart shattered into a million pieces. Dani couldn’t tell if it was because of the girl or the drug. “Tequila.” Frankie whimpered, but didn’t move a muscle. The girl in his lap twisted to see who opened the door.

“Either join in or get out.” The girl demanded, and Dani slammed the door shut. She knew she probably looked crazy; Tears running down her face, smearing her makeup, frantically looking for Will or Benny. She found the youngest Miller first, who immediately left the woman he was chatting up upon seeing Dani’s distressed state.

“Tequila, what happened?” He asked, wiping tears from her face. She tried to tell him, but it only came out in broken sobs. Benny was able to pick up “Frankie” and “cocaine”; After that, she was incoherent. Benny wrapped his arms around her, trying to give her some comfort. “Come on, let’s find Will and go.”

It took twenty minutes for Benny to track down Will, who was hooking up with the party host, Sara. Benny explained that Dani came up to him, sobbing and mentioned Frankie and coke. Will rushed to get dressed, apologizing for his hasty exit.

Dani was standing outside by Will’s jeep, eyes swollen and face red. Will rushed over, “Teq, I’m so sorry.” He comforted and placed a kiss to her head before ushering her into the car, just in time for Frankie to come running out the door. Benny took three large strides toward him before throwing a right hook that connected hard with his jaw.

“The fuck were you thinking, Fish? I thought you quit that shit!” Benny yelled at his friend who clutched his face where a red bruise was already starting to form, struggling to get up off the ground.

“Please, Benny.” Frankie started as he stood up, gesturing to the girl crying in the front seat “Let me talk to her.” He begged, trying to move toward the car. Will stepped in.

“You’ve done enough, Catfish. Leave her alone.” Will growled at the man before him. Frankie, exhaled a shaky breath and took a step back from his friends.

“I’m sorry.” He mumbled. “I’m so sorry.” He yelled a little louder, hoping Dani could hear him through the window. She turned her head just in time to see the same brunette that was seated on his lap, start dragging him back inside.

Dani didn’t leave her room for three days. She barely touched anything Will or Benny brought her to eat. She barely slept, the image of Frankie doing lines of the white substance haunted her dreams. She tried to focus on the crappy ‘B’ rated horror movie playing on Netflix.

A knock on the door drew her from the screen. “It’s open.” She said numbly. It was Will. He came in carrying a tray of food and a few water bottles. Dani noticed and gave him a quiet ‘thank you’, before turning her attention back to her laptop.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Will asked her just like he had every day before. Today she seemed ready.

“Why didn’t anyone tell me?” She whispered, still looking at the screen. Will took a seat next to her on the bed.

“It wasn’t our story to tell. As far as we knew, he cleaned up after being discharged. Tequila, I promise you, if any of us knew, we would have told you.” Will tried to explain to her, knowing that his words weren’t going to help much.

Tears slowly started to trickle down her cheeks. She felt so stupid, letting herself get so close to him. Will pulled the computer away from her lap, sitting it on her bedside table. She instantly curled into him as sobs wracked her body. Will felt so helpless. On one hand, he has his best friend who has a drug problem and on the other, his best friend who has a broken heart. He didn’t know where to begin to fix either. Will noticed that the sobs finally stopped and her breathing evened out. She was finally asleep. He could have wiggled out from her hold, but instead, he made himself comfortable and fell asleep, too.

“What the fuck are you doing here, Frankie?” Benny’s voice stirred Will awake. He shot up off the bed and ran to the living room. He found Benny holding Catfish back from entering the doorway.

“I need to talk to her, Benny. I have to- shit, I have to explain myself.” Frankie begged his friend.

Will could see his brother getting angrier by the second, so he intervened. “Go check on her, make sure she’s still sleeping. I’ll handle this.” Will prompted his brother. Benny relaxed, moving away from Frankie. Will slid into his spot, blocking him from coming inside.

“Will, please.” Frankie begged. “I just want to see her. I’m sorry for this. I never wanted to hurt her.” All Frankie wanted was to make sure she was okay. He was about to speak again when Dani’s voice broke through the silence. Frankie took in her state, hair in a bun, eyes rimmed red and puffy.

“It’s okay, Ironhead.” She murmured, arms wrapped around herself in mock comfort. Will turned himself to face her. He brought a hand up to caress her face, erasing stray tears. He gave her his best ‘are you sure?’ look. She nodded, “I’ll be okay, Will. I’ll yell if I need you.” She tried to give him a smile, but she was so damn tired.

Will looked back at Frankie, “I love you, man, but she better not need me." The blonde threatened him and Frankie knew he meant it. He shook his head in agreement; Frankie would gladly let Will hurt him. He just wanted to make this right. Will moved over, letting Frankie pass him into the living room. Frankie looked around. Out of all the times he sat in the room, he never imagined himself sitting here because of this.

Dani moved to take a seat across from him. She gave Will a look to let him know that she was okay, and he left the room. She focused her attention back to the man in front of her. He looked tired, like he hadn’t slept either. His eyes were bloodshot, and he had dark circles under them, which didn’t complement the five o’clock shadow that dusted his face. She couldn’t help but wonder if it was because of her or the drugs.

Frankie noticed Dani looking over his features, and he felt ashamed, like he didn’t deserve to have her look at him. He hung his head low, trying to avoid making eye contact with her. He knew he couldn’t hide his face forever, but for now, the floor was looking pretty good.

Dani shuffled in her seat, trying to get herself comfortable before diving into a conversation she really did not want to have. As she thought of what she was going to say, Frankie started to apologize.

“I’m so fucking sorry, Teq.” He raised his head, tears chasing each other down his face. “I know that sorry doesn’t mean much, but I am.” Frankie wiped his tears away as he finally made eye contact with her.

“Why, Frankie?” Her words were barely detectable, but Frankie heard them. Those two words put a vice grip around his heart and he felt like he couldn’t breathe. He didn’t know why. Why did he let himself fall off the wagon after so long? Why did he let Vanessa back into his life when he could have had Dani? He didn’t have any answers for her.

“Can I start from the beginning?” He asked her, hoping they could talk things out. Dani thought it over. Did she really want to hear this? The choice was obvious. she needed to know and gave Frankie a curt nod.

Frankie moved to the floor in front of her chair, sitting crossed legged, looking up at her. “It started after my first helo crash.” Frankie began.

“This is gonna be a bumpy ride boys,” Frankie yelled through the headset. He was maneuvering the helo through gunfire, trying to find a safe place to land.

“Fish, we got smoke back here!” Pope bellowed, hanging onto the doorway of the cockpit. Frankie looked back at his friend. How was he going to do this? He looked back down to the earth, and all he saw was desert sand. “Fish! We gotta land, man. Or this thing’s gonna blow!” Santiago reiterated.

Frankie found a spot far enough away from the flying bullets, that he could try to land as safely as possible. When he started to bring it down, alarms started blaring, lights flashed. “Fuck! Guys, buckle up. This isn’t going to be good.”

“That crash broke Benny’s arm. Since then, I was a nervous wreck behind the controls. I almost got everyone killed because I couldn’t land the damned helo. My mistake almost killed my friends.” Frankie paused to compose himself. “At first, I only did it to calm my nerves, then I just lost control of it, using whenever I could. I was discharged with my license suspended. I did a rehab program and luckily, I was able to get my license reinstated.”

Dani tried to comprehend what he was telling her. All of her medical training told her that he had a disease, an addiction. She wanted to reach out and console him, but he kept this from her. She had shared all of her secrets with him and he kept this huge one from her. “What about the girl?” She asked, knowing she had no right to be jealous. Frankie wasn’t hers.

“Vanessa was a fling, someone I would get high with. She was just there.” He gulped, “I wasn’t looking to get high. It was a moment of weakness. I hadn’t used it in almost thirteen months.” Since he met her. He was laying everything out for her and he was praying she would still accept him.

Dani sat there, staring at the man in front of her. He was unrecognizable. He looked sad, broken. Nowhere near the happy, flirty, person she met on Benny’s birthday. She wasn’t sure how to respond. She wanted to understand. She wanted to help him past this, but she didn’t know how. She didn’t know if she was strong enough.

“Please say something, hermosa. Lo siento mucho.” Frankie apologized again, reaching to grab her hands. She didn’t pull away like he thought she would. Instead, she moved to kneel on the ground with him.

She released his hands to pull him in for a hug. The gesture was enough to completely destroy Frankie’s resolve. Frankie sobbed into her. “Lo siento mucho. Lo haré mejor, lo prometo.” Dani held him for what felt like forever, stroking his hair.

“I want to help you, Frankie.” She whispered into his hair, still holding him close. “But I need you to want to help yourself.” Frankie’s head bobbed in agreement. He needed this.

The following weeks were hard on Frankie. Detoxing off the drug was a lot harder than he remembered, but Dani was there every step of the way. The exhaustion, shakes, and cravings were tolerable, but when the nightmares started, Frankie didn’t know if he would make it.

Dani let herself into Frankie’s apartment after her shift at the hospital. “Frankie?” She called out but did not get a reply. She moved further inside, making her way to Frankie’s room. She heard the shower running as she walked into his bedroom. “Frankie?” She called out again.

As she got closer to the bathroom, she could hear Frankie’s broken sobs over the shower. She rushed in to see him sitting in the corner of the tub, knees drawn to his chest. He raised his head when the door slammed into the wall.

“Dani?” He choked out, like he was surprised to see her. She rushed over to him. Feeling that the water was freezing, she quickly turned it off. She grabbed a towel, throwing it over him to give him some form of cover.

“Fuck, fish. What’re you doing? Trying to give yourself hypothermia?” Dani moved to grab more towels. She was able to get him to stand up and move into the bedroom. She searched his room for warm clothing. “Here.” She handed him the sweats and hoodie she found. “I’m gonna make you something to eat while you get dressed.” She exited the room and closed the door behind her. She felt her own tears threatening to fall down her face. It was hard to see her friend like this. She wiped away the drops that strayed down, trying to compose herself.

Frankie emerged from his room and followed the savory smell coming from the kitchen. “Hermosa.” His voice cracks a little, but she still hears him. Smiling, she turns to see him, arms wrapped around himself. “Shit, Teq.” He walks over to her, bringing a hand up to caress her face. “I didn’t mean to make you cry again.” He whispers, pulling her in for a hug.

“I’m okay, Fish.” She mumbles into his chest. “I made bacon and eggs.” She wasn’t going to say that was all she could make with the contents in his kitchen because the man was already down.

“Thank you, Dani. For everything. I think the worst has finally passed.” Frankie told her as they sat down at his tiny dining table. She handed him his plate before placing her own in front of her. The two ate in a comfortable silence.

“You wanna talk about it?” Dani asked as Frankie cleared the table. Frankie placed the dishes in the sink and turned back to where she sat at the table.

“I keep having the same nightmare. I’m in a helo and it's going down. It’s just like that first crash, except you’re there. And there’s nothing I can do to save you.” Frankie describes his dream, fighting back the emotion that is pouring through him.

“I’m here, Frankie. I’m here.” She tells him as she walks over. Taking his hand and placing it over her heart. “Feel that? I’m alive.” She moves it over his own, “You are, too. We are going to figure this out together.” The tension between them is palpable. Frankie looks down at Dani, her blue orbs staring back at him and all he can think about his pressing his lips to hers. Instead, he pulls away. She deserves more than a fuck up like me, he thought.

“Thank you. For dinner, fuck, for everything. You should go home and get some rest.” He practically pushed her out the door. “I’ll be okay.” He reassured her one last time before she said good-bye. He watched her walk to her car, climb inside, and drive away.

After the almost kiss, Dani did her best to give Frankie space. She knew he was going through a lot and he was probably having a lot of conflicted emotions. She stayed away from his apartment for about a week, checking in via text. He always responded immediately.

It was Saturday evening, and she had just finished her ER shift. She had sent a text to Frankie earlier in the day and still had not heard from him. Deciding that a trip to his apartment was warranted, Dani made her way over.

She knocked on the door three times before it opened. “Vanessa?” Dani choked out as the brunette stood there, wrapped in a towel. “Where’s Frankie?” She asked, her voice a little shaky.

“He’s busy, sweetie. Go home.” Vanessa snarked with a smirk on her face. Dani rolled her eyes, before storming past her toward Frankie’s room. She all but kicked the door open, sending the handle smashing into the wall.

“What the fuck?!” Frankie yelled, coming out of his bathroom, towel wrapped around his waist. The angry look on his face dropped as soon as he saw her. “Fuck.” He whispered, dropping his head. Dani knew immediately what was going on.

“Frankie, tell me this isn’t what it looks like.” She wished, pointing to the powdered substance on his dresser. He didn’t answer. “Frankie, please.” Her voice cracked, “Tell me you aren’t doing fucking coke again.” She pleaded. He raised his head to look at her, but did not answer.

She shook her head in disappointment before walking out of the room. “Dani!” Frankie called as he chased after her. “Dani, please, don’t go.” He begged her. She stopped in her tracks before she reached the door. Vanessa scoffed, muttering under her breath “to let her go”.

She slowly turned around. “Fuck you, Frankie Morales. Fuck you and fuck her.” She spat, pointing to Vanessa who was sitting on Frankie’s couch. Dani focused back on Frankie. “Thank you for wasting my time, my effort, my love. I told you when I started to help you that you had to want to get clean. You’ve made it very clear that you don’t. So, fuck you.” She blubbered, tears of regret and hurt welling in her eyes, spilling over her lashes.

She didn’t wait for a reply as she walked out of the door. It closed behind her with a loud thud. She got to her car and let out the sobs she was holding in. Dani had never felt anything like this. Even when she caught him at the party, it didn’t hurt this bad. She felt like some punched her in the stomach and could hear her heart pounding in her ears. What was she supposed to do now?

Dani pulled into her driveway to find Santiago sitting outside on the porch, like he was waiting on someone to come home. She put her car in park and he’s there to open her door. “¿Estás bien?” He asked as she stepped out.

She didn’t dare to look the brunette in the eyes, because she knew she'd break. “I’m fine.” She replied curtly, looking at the ground, walking toward the house. He followed quickly behind her. Once inside, she threw her bag onto the couch, going straight to the kitchen. She poured a shot of tequila, offering one for Santiago. He shakes his head ‘no’.

“Shit, Teq. What’s wrong?” He asks again, worry laced in his voice. He can tell she’s been crying. Her eyes are red, and her face is blotchy. She downs the alcohol and pours another.

“He’s doing coke again.” She rasped out, throwing back the second drink. Slamming the glass on the counter, she left Santiago and walked to her room.

He ran a hand down his face before tailing her. What the fuck have you done, Catfish. He thought. He found Dani laying face first into her pillow. “What do you mean he’s doing coke again?” He questions, sitting next to her legs.

She rolled over and sat up. “I mean, I hadn’t heard from him all day. I was worried. I got to his apartment and Vanessa was there.” she hiccuped, falling back on the pillow again. “There was coke on his dresser.” Dani sniffled, a sickening feeling growing in her stomach.

“I’m sorry, Dani.” He whispered, not really sure if she heard him. He is sorry. He’s sorry that Frankie is being an idiot. He’s sorry that she’s hurting. And he’s sorry that all he wants to do is make it better.

Dani fought to push her sadness down. She wiped her tears away and moved to sit up again, so that she’s looking at him. “I’m sorry, you looked like you had something you wanted to say.” She apologized and gave him her full attention.

Santiago nodded. “Yeah. I’m um, I’m going to South America. Colombia. I got a contract with the military.” He told her. “I’m supposed to leave in a month.” Her face dropped, and for a second she wonders how much heartbreak a person can take.

“South America? For how long?” She asked in disbelief. How could Santi be going to a different country? She just lost Frankie, she couldn’t lose him, too.

“I’m not sure.” He was being honest. He didn’t know when or if he would be back. It wasn’t going to be the safest contract. Dani sat there staring at him, speechless. “Teq?” He said, and she lifted her sad eyes to his. Almost as if he could read her mind, he promised, “I’ll come back.”

She shakes her head. “You don’t know that, Santi.” She mumbled, “What if you don’t come back?” The brunette shakes his head, telling her that she can’t think like that.

His cedar brown eyes met her blue ones. He reached out for her, pulling her into his embrace. He had an internal debate on whether or not he should say anything. It would be completely selfish of him, especially since he knew how Fish felt about her. That didn’t stop him from saying, "I have a contact down there who can get you certification to practice there. You could come with me, work in a hospital there."

Dani's body stiffened. Go to South America with Santi? She couldn't, could she? Santi could practically see the gears turning in her head. "It's not a marriage proposal, babe." He joked, trying to lighten the mood.

Dani let out a breathy laugh, "Yeah, like I would ever assume you are proposing marriage." Santi rolled his eyes, squeezing her tighter.

"I could settle down for the right woman." He rebutted, and they both burst into laughter. They knew Santi wasn’t the ‘settle down’ type. His arms relaxed around her and she wiggled her way out of his hold to sit back down on her bed.

"Seriously though, Tequila. If you want to come, the option is there." He offered her again. She could look into it. She could help so many less fortunate people, the whole reason why she wanted to become a doctor. After tonight, maybe it would be for the best.

"Okay." She says and his eyes go wide, like he didn't hear her correctly. "I want to go." She reiterates. Now he knows he wasn't hearing things. A huge smile crossed his face and he scooped her up into his arms again. Dani sighed in contentment. He smelled like mint and leather, even though he wasn’t wearing any, with a hint of whiskey.

She leaned her head back, so that she could look up at him. She was surprised to find him staring back at her. Her eyes subconsciously flickered to his lips as his tongue swiped out to dampen them. She didn't know if it was the buzz from the alcohol earlier, but she pushed forward to crash her lips into his.

Santi froze at the feeling of her lips on his. It was if he had fallen into one of his dreams, where the blonde woman had been running rampant. His hand found purchase at the back of her head, pulling her closer as their lips moved in tandem.

Dani's arms wrapped around his neck, her fingers playing in the curls growing at the base of his head. She felt his tongue dance along her bottom lip, as if to ask for permission to enter. She parted her lips, finally tasting him as their tongues met. He even tasted like mint and whiskey.

Santi nibbled her bottom lip, which drew a low moan from her. He knew right then that he wanted more sounds from her. He tightened the grip on the back of her head, pulling it to the side, so that he could have access to her neck. He broke the kiss unceremoniously, before attacking her neck, finding her sweet spot immediately.

"Santi," Dani whimpered with need. Santi groaned at the sound of his name coming off her lips. She sounded like an angel. He wanted to hear more.

He pulled back to look at her. Her eyes so dark with lust, Santi could barely see the baby blue. Her hair was a mess where he buried his fingers. She looked absolutely beautiful. "Fuck, Tequila." Santi said breathlessly. His hands caressed her face, one thumb swiping over her bottom lip. "Fuck, as much as I want to do this. I can't." He said as his hands dropped and he stepped back. "I'm sorry, Teq. You would hate me in the morning."

Dani, brain still fuzzy with need, nodded, "Yeah, yeah. You're right. It's best that we stop now." She hesitantly agreed, when really what she wanted was for him to make her forget. Make her forget Frankie. Make her forget work. Make her forget her own name.

Santi took a deep breath, running a hand across his face. His eyes met hers once more, trying to find any signs of regret. There were none. "We really shouldn't do this." He said one more time before connecting their lips again.

Translations:

Hermosa- Beautiful

Lo siento mucho- I’m really sorry.

Lo haré mejor, lo prometo- I’ll do better, I promise.

¿estás bien?- Are you okay?

#santiago garcia #frankie morales #will miller #benny miller #santiago garcia x ofc #frankie morales x ofc #frankie catfish morales #santiago pope garcia #will ironhead miller #triple frontier #frankie morales fic #santiago garcia fic #santiago garcia imagine #frankie morales imagine #triple frontier imagine #triple frontier fic #frankie morales angst #angst #kat writes

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nlights37 · 3 years

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I want you to answer everything! But if you can’t then can I have 5, 12, 13, 16 pretty please? I’m dying to know what goes on in that brilliant mind of yours. My pen is ready for notes. Go!

Live shot of me reading this - okay, anything for you, my little angel!

5) character you were most surprised to end up writing

Hahahahaha oh man, most surprised to end up writing - gotta be Edd in Something Stupid, only because at the start it didn’t seem like he’d end up being such an integral part of Jonerys coming together but what an MVP! He ended up being a much larger part of the story than I ever anticipated, probably more than any other minor character I’ve used.

12) your weaknesses as an author

Have you got a few hours? LOL probably my lack of ever making a cohesive outline, and my dependency on ‘Let’s just see what comes while I’m writing it’. I don’t outline, ever. Terrible about making notes for myself, also. I would say that means I don’t plan ahead, but that’s not totally true. I do - but usually my normal day is spent doing other things, and thankfully mostly mindless things, so I can kind of space out and really spend hours turning over a story and looking at it and figuring out what my high points are.

It’s my lack of actually writing that down that can bite me in the ass.

AND!

I hate writing it down because then I feel like I’m locked into it and my entire being chafes at being confined like that. Intellectually that is a silly thing, but my mind just does what it wants sometimes. Maybe it’s my Sagittarius flaring up. Either way idk, it would probaby make shit a lot easier if I was better about that.

Oh, and run-on sentences. Like a bitch. Sometimes it’s for that stream of thought effect, sometimes I just forget where I’m at in the sentence and my mind is a few lines ahead already and I’m trying to catch up and then boom it’s just words, so many words. Like that sentence, right there. What a fucking mess.

Oh, another biggie. I almost can’t even type it. It is shocking. My first draft? Yep, that’s also my final draft. I know. It’s fucking stupid. I don’t know why I’m like this lol.

Oh, also, so many WIPs. You guys don’t even know. My Google drive will judge me soon.

13) your strengths as an author

I am fast at typing. :)

I think I usually turn out a pretty satisfactory experience. Like, I don’t care about being fandom popular and shit like that. I’m kinda more about hoping that when people see my name pop up in the tag they know, off the bat, that I’m gonna give them something fun, something that will make them laugh, or ‘awww’ or maybe fan themselves lightly. Whatever it is, I guess I figure so long as I keep getting those kinds of comments like “I see your name and I know it’s gonna be a banger”, then I know I’m succeeding at consistency, if nothing else.

So yes, consistency. I think I’m that.

I hope so!

16) are there any characters who haunt you?

Thin Line Jonerys - I have an unfinished Part 3 for them that’s sitting there tapping very expensive shoes at me like ‘What the fuck? Just fuck us, huh? Give people what they want!” They’re too hot though, sometimes it’s hard to look at them directly. Plus I have to be in an appropriately ‘asshole’ mood to get the tone right there.

One of these days.

Thank you so much @libradoodle1 - you remain my adopted child, now and forever

#jonerys #fanfic #my fics #writer ask game

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pendragaryen · 4 years

Text

The things that stay with us...

This was supposed to be my last BFSN-post while the show is still airing - the last BFSN-entry right before the series finale. But now it’s just... a FSN-post? Call it a Big-Hug-post. A Hug-Gratitude-post. Or whatever you prefer. Though in my heart Bellarke will ALWAYS be canon (and nothing can ever change that): They didn’t give it to us in the actual show (a show, whose narrative clearly told us otherwise all this time, but well.. whatever...). It’s too much honour to grace such a disappointing last season with a BFSN, dearies. (Or... even more so now? ;P ) So, call it what you like i guess! ;). Honestly, i didn’t want it to end.. just like that... without any last words to you, the kindest, most tolerant and beautiful minded fandom i’ve ever been (proudly!) a part of since 2016. (The selfie lies. It’s not current. I’m sorry, i can’t show you my face these days.. This is from the day just before it all went inevitably down with this season: BB’s death. So... enjoy: That smile’s for you, fam! ;) 2nd pic: The tattoo i got almost two years ago now, on Sept. 22nd 2018, and that never fails to remind me of my emotional support person and the fact, that after every “down” in life there will come an “up” again <3<3<3 )

What makes the whole experience of this last ever season of The 1OO for me so incredibly sad is.... Well, please bear with me if you will... My english STILL isn’t the very best... But i’m trying to put my feelings into words:

Last year, when we got the news that S7 would be the final season, i DREADED this moment. I was AFRAID of this last day (and the hours) before the actual finale. And why so? Bc I am a person, who’s an incredible loser when it comes to let go of the things i love so dearly. Like The 1OO. I... in times i was OBSESSED with it, with the story, with the chacracters and the way they’ve been written, so credible, so tangible in their actions, nothing was just bad or good and even the villains actions had been understandable to some extend. It was amazing! I felt with almost every character! I LOVED it. (And to be very clear here: I’ll never STOP loving The 100′s 6 seasons, that are still existing for me!)

But what i wanted to say is: I dreaded the moment when l would have to let it go. THat inevitable moment, when this show with all its storylines and characters, that have been a part of my life for the last years and that i love so dearly, really ends. Forever. It would end and i wouldn’t be ready to let go, bc it means the world to me. Bc it changed me in more than just one way - no, even better, bc it made me want to change myself! “To do better...” *ugly crying...* THis show SAVED me in a way and in a time, where i was in a very dark place in life, in a very dark mind space (constant illnesses, termination of my job due to these illnesses, an ugly lawsuit etc. pp) , this show and its actors, especially one Robert Alfred Morley (yes), who helped me to look at myself and my mental insecurities and illness from a whole new point of view. I wasn’t ashamed of myself anymore. I felt... relieved. Understood. I even felt kind of loved for what i am, even with my anxieties. (There may or may not come a point or even a person in everyones life, that helps to develop this new kind of view on themselves. And for me this person was and always will be Bob Morley. And whatever happens, i’ll always love him for his open- and kindness and be thankful for his inspiration. I still call myself lucky to have talked with him a couple of times. I treasure these moments. Always.)

So, i was AFRAID of this day, when this all would come to an end. I KNEW it would wreck me, i would be devestated, i would be so incredibly sad, that i won’t be able to put it into words.

And here i am now. I AM sad. I AM devestated. But for so very different reasons that i could never imagine in my wildest nightmares... This last season... Season 7--- no i won’t start again. Not AGAIN. But... just that: What they’ve been creating for us here... it really overshadowed my joy of watching this show throughout this last season, yes even BEFORE that horrible murder of my all time fave and comfort character. I take back whatever i said about S6 or even S5. THIS... S7 was the season, that didn’t feel like the show i fell in love with anymore. Though changes CAN be refreshing and exciting... these changes haven’t been that for me.

Look. The thing is: Even WITH Bob’s request for time off and everything... There would’ve been PLENTY options for the writers to actually make it all make kind of sense! THEY COULD’VE DONE IT BETTER! If they’d really wanted to, that is... And here’s the point: I think they didn’t WANT it. For whatever reasons, whatever happened bts, they decided to do it like they did. And no-one’s able to understand their choices or the characters anymore - those characters we used to know so well, these characters i felt with over the course of so many seasons - who i could understand! EVEN THE VILLAINS! And now... look at the thanks we got. I can’t understand shit anymore when it comes to S7. Bc nothing makes sense. When i see even the GREATEST meta-writers among us surrender in their posts - than it’s really sad times for this fandom...

It’s not even just about Bellarke anymore. Sure, i AM disappointed that they’re not canon now. But then they shouldn’t have arranged the whole story around these two! “The backbone of the whole story”!!! I am laughing. In that case S7 was SPINELESS! Let me tell you. Everyone’s just... flailing around... great little side storylines, but somehow... disconnected from each other and all over the place. That’s how it felt for me to watch this season. And i’m feeling so exhausted by now... I never stopped hoping... I always thought, at some point it would make sense. I’ve read all your great metas AND I WANTED TO BELIEVE! It made perfect sense! (I seriously felt like Fox Mulder from time to time this season... and the lack of sense in the storyline as well as the complete absence of my personal faves (yes i include Clarke (Eliza) here, bc heck, she was so sidelined this season too, self inflicted or not) - all these things had been the “UFO’s or aliens i was hoping to see” one day... Guess i was wrong.)

I’m babbling... Sorry. But it will be for the last time in that kind of form. Promise.

At the end of the day (at the end of all things.. sigh, Frodo... i see you... *blinks back tears*) I am so glad that you’re all here with me, in the same boat. That I’m not alone feeling this kind of lost and baited and betrayed. Bc whatever you like to call it: The narrative promised us otherwise. Did JRott OWE us canon Bellarke? NO. Of course not. But HIS STORY did. The story he’d been telling us for SIX GD YEARS! THAT is what makes me so mad. But most of the time (and despite the selfie above) i’m just sad. Sad and disappointed. I know it will pass one day. And that i’ll find joy in watching S1-4, even S5 except for a couple of scenes, and certain episodes of S6 again. But now is not the day. Even IF they’ll give these characters a “happy ending” in some transcended form or whatever, in the afterlife maybe,... S7 is ruined for me. It wasn’t even a bliss for me before, but it was certainly ruined after they killed “The Heart” - pointlessly (THIS is what will haunt me even years from now..).

Today is the day for saying goodbye. It aches my heart, that we’ll have to do it the way we have to now. But at least we are together. So let’s raise a glass in honour of all the hours of joy and excitement this show brought us over the years, maybe even the tears and laughter, let’s raise a glass for the outstanding performances of the cast and the great storylines some writers developed for us. I am thankful beyond words. Let’s raise a glass to this awesome, talented fandom! I’ve met and talked to dozens of you guys througout the years, and it had always been a pleasure! I hope we’ll stay in touch! <3<3<3 And last but not least: Let’s raise a glass for Kass Morgan. This is HER baby in more than just one way. Without her vision... there wouldn’t have been a show. Or even Bellarke. CANON Bellarke, that is! ;) And i LOVE it!

These are the things that stay with us, these are the things we will remember.

So, have fun with the finale tonight guys! Or should i say: Good luck? ;) I won’t watch now. I haven’t watched since 7x13, and i won’t start again tonight. Not even for the finale. BUT... i’ll probably do it some day in the future. I’m still kind of curious after all. And there are still some characters i want to know how it ends for them. It‘s just... i don’t want to support any ratings. I don’t want to support JRott anymore. But i’ll probably get back to it - if what y’all will write about it afterwards looks promising or not... ;)

See you on the other side!

(Tags under the cut)

Hugs and love to you, dear fam! Tagging @together-is-my-favourite-place @natassakar @geekyogicheese @immortalpramheda @carrieeve @bellamyblake @angelbellamy @burninghoneyatdusk @iwearplaids @wankadi @katersann @nvermindiseeyou @ruggedmurphy @clarkgriffon @poppykru @broashwhat @malclmbright @kizo2703 @cominguproses13x @clarkeindra @tenmonologues @shialablunt @sometimesrosy @zavens @wonderingwhyy @charmainediyoza @the-suns-also-rise @lee-em-dee @bellamynochillblake @junebugninja @songhyeri @underbellamy @talistheintrovert @jeanie205 @bellamys11thfreckle @doontpanic @clarkegriffinblake @goddess-clarke @eyessharpweaponshot @hostagetakerandhistraitor @infp-with-all-the-feelings @theatre-steph @historyofbellarke @as-inevitable-as-morning @bisexualbellamyblake @little-oxford-st @delicatebluebirdruins in no particular order (i am so sorry in advance, if i should’ve forgotten someone... >.<), and yes, i include you too @merlination my Danny, bc without you, i wouldn’t have started watching The 1OO in the first place... ;)

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snickiebear · 3 years

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yo nadia <3333 i'm bored in my online classes and u reblogged the questions thingy at the right time lmao, so get ready: 1, 4, 5, 9, 10, 17, 23, 24, 28, 30!!!, 34, 38, 39, 40 (the intimacy of being understood) (imma stop here lol) (also i'm sorry u're not feeling well, ily and hope u'll feel better soon!! <33333)

ELE ILY. (and thank you, i’m stayin home today cause,,, yeah. i appreciate you sm.) you’re the literal best, i adore you.

1. How long ago did you start reading fanfiction? Writing fanfiction?

The first fanfiction i read was for The Lunar Chronicles when I was like 11?? and it was 100% on accident and it scarred me because it was a hardcore porn one with a period kink and i was like WHAT IS THIS??? OH MY GOD???? LMAOOOOO i didn’t pick it back up until i was 13-14 and really got into the Fairy Tail fandom. I still reread my favorites on ff.net cause i love them.

As for writing, I wrote a horrible, terrible x-men fanfiction when I was twelve. (my friend still brings it up and REFUSES to delete it so it still gets comments and views, that shit HAUNTS ME ELE.) then tried again for Fairy Tail, posted like two chapters before taking it down cause i wasn’t really feeling it. And then I posted The Intimacy Of Being Understood and here we are.

4. Link your three favorite fics right now.

OMGG okok

@murd3rm1ttens ‘s The Problem How Time Works IF YOU HAVENT READ THIS YOU GUYS NEED TO HOP ON IT ASAP. MITTEN’S WRITING SO SO SO SO GOOD. SAKURA AND INO ARE TOTAL BADASSES. KAKASHI IS A SIMPPPP. ITS SO FUCKING GOOD.

@mouseymightymarvellous ‘s We Were Screaming In Color (Only A Possibility) yes, yes I KNOW. i always point into mousey’s direction but i WILL always advocate that everyone reads her fics, they’re literally so beautiful???? i just happen to be rereading WWSIN rn

@safelycapricious ‘s Shaking Up And Breaking Down series. I found this like?? idfk but i’ve been raving about it ever since. ALSO CHECK OUT THEIR FICS IN GENERAL.

fuck i have more than three but also check out @ambivalens999 ‘s Masks

i do wanna make a fic rec thing where i just rav about my favs,,, might do that later or sum

5. What are your fanfic pet peeves? Do they have a huge effect on whether or not you decide to read something?

Omniscient third person. I don’t like it. Like I can understand that it can be a little hard to stay in one person’s perspective but, in my opinion, if you can, it shows how disciplined you are as a writer. Plus, i just get so confused when I go from A’s thoughts to suddenly what B is thinking about A.

When writers use ‘ ‘ instead of “ “. When writers put thoughts in ‘ ‘ instead of just italicizing them. It’s small things but like they just bother me sO MUCH. most of the time i can ignore it and try to enjoy but other times i just dip.

9. Tag 3 fic writers you think are underrated/unknown in the fandom/fanfiction community.

@espoir-et-reves !!!!! THEIR SHISAKU FICS ARE SO SO SO SO SO GOOD. And they have a warring states one going on THAT I AM SO OBSESSED WITH.

@writer168 idk if they’re really “underrated” but THEY HAVE SUCH GREAT FICS ON AO3. Like theres an AU with sakura, kiba, and shino that i reread constantly because it just. is. so. fucking. GOOD. and they posted a new one that i’m YELLING about.

@eggtoasties okay they only have 2 in the naruto fandom (one shisaku which is still ongoing) BUT THEIR WRITING STYLE IS SO NICE?? I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT. I still go back and reread their shikasaku one cause UGH i can’t get enough. I love it.

10. What’s your favorite fandom, pairing, or character to read fic for?

Fandoms: Naruto, Soul Eater, The Old Guard, ATLA

Parings: KakaSaku/ShikaSaku/ShiSaku/MultiSaku, SoMa, Joe X Nicky, Zukka

Character: SAKURA. I will read anything with Sakura as the main character and her being a fuckin badass or becoming a badass. I love her.

17. How obsessively do you sit and stare at your fic after you’ve just posted and wait for feedback?

aha.. haha.. well. I check my email like three times an hour. its the first thing i check in the mornings too. I’m literally a whore for praise and literally eat up feedback like its going out of style. I also reread a lot of my stuff because i make so many mistakes and spelling errors, or the spacing is weird oR SOMETHING. plus, literally any and all comments make my day, i go back and reread them cause they just make me feel so tingly and warm like “wow. this person enjoyed the fic/my writing enough to tell me. thats HUGE!”

23. What’s your absolute favorite trope to write?

Angry, feral, bloodied, morally gray women. They aren’t bad guys, they’re probably the good guy, but that doesn’t mean they cant be fucking raging at the world with raw knuckles and blood on their teeth. I just love an angry woman who struggles with her emotions and just has so much inner conflict but that doesn’t take away from her character or badassery, it adds to it.

24. What’s a trope that you’d like to never hear about as long as you live, let alone write?

The fake dating or miscommunication troupe. LIKE GUYS JUST TALK. AND TELL EACH OTHER OMFG. the entire like obliviousness of “nah they dont like me” while the They holds their hand and kisses their cheek. MOFO WHAT. it makes me so impatient and like mad HAAHHAHA. its probably because i’m a pretty confrontational person so seeing stuff like that just “cmon bro, USE YO HEAD.”

28. How do you deal with writing pressure (ie: pressure to update, negative comments, deadlines, etc)?

I have yet to receive a negative comment! Which i was really surprised about tbh. As for deadlines or pressure to update, i just kind of do whatever. I do set goals, but i set them flexible enough that hey, if i can’t do it, that’s okay.

I have a lot of mini goals, like “i want to write this chapter and get it done this week” and then the large goal is “FINISH BY END OF MAY” so i have time.

Actually, now that I think on it, the entire pressure to update thing is probably why i’m waiting until I have all of OL&W written to post it weekly,, cause well. I wouldn’t wanna leave you guys waiting as I tried to write and work out the next chapters and stuff, you know?

30. Post a snippet from your current WIP without context - no more than 300 words.

AAAAAA YOU KNOW I LOVE THESE AHAHAHAH

Have you seen the way the dead dance, World Breaker? They roar, half mad and starving. Do you not wish, do you not hope to see them twist and bend and dance to your will?

Shikamaru snarls, looking behind his shoulders to where his Shadows lay. “Patience.” He spits. “Is of the essence, Things of Ancient. Know your place as the dark you are.”

34. How much of yourself and your life experiences do you put into your writing? What do you think your readers’ image of you is?

None of my experiences match up to anything I write tbh,,, probably the only thing that is me in my writing is maybe the emotional turmoil? I’m pretty emotionally and mentally mature because from a pretty young age i started forming my own opinions, started looking into the world around us and being like “dude what the fuck this is not what disney advertised”. Then i started talking (read: arguing and debating) with my dad about a lot of it. So, like emotions are kind of hard for me. Like i’m pretty good at controlling them or understanding them, but still. idk its hard to explain ig.

Like the weight of stress, the anger, the sadness. It’s kind of therapeutic to write. Cause i don’t know how to put those feelings to verbal words so writing them really helps.

As for my readers’ image? Probably like some kind of hunched over figure typing away in the dark with a maniacal grin on their face. I honestly don’t know AHHAHAHA but it is fun to think about. I think they’d see me as someone with potential but a lot of room to grow and someone who is imperfect but in a charming way LMAOOOO

38. What does your writing process look like? How chaotic is it on a scale of 1 (very tame) to 10 (you can’t handle this kind of chaos)?

I’m gonna be real honest. Its probably like a 2. I’m a bit of a control freak so I almost always go in chronological order, my writing is pretty linear. Unless, i get bored and jump to one of my fav parts. It's pretty much i sit down, i open the doc, read over my notes and just start writing.

It’s a little boring to explain AHAHAHA but once i get into the groove of things its really fucking great, I can like feel myself in the world, I can feel what i want the characters to, i love it. I catch myself mouthing the words as i type too, which i find hilarious.

39. What’s something about your writing that you pride yourself on?

I rather like how raw my writing is sometimes. Which might sound really vain, but i do like the way i word things or describe things. I love juxtaposition and repetition, or making a good ole circle back to some minute detail that wouldn’t stand out until i repeat it at the end and you’re like “omg” AHAHAHAHA.

Like those little poetic snippets or certain wording i just sit back and go “damn thats kinda good nadia! go you!’ HAHAHA

40. How did you come up with the idea for The Intimacy Of Being Understood?

AAAAA this fic is like my first child, my pride and joy LMAO

so the idea initially came when i was reading some fic, idk if it was even naruto, but i was like “i don't like this, but i do like the rain symbolism.” And I knew i wanted to write something kind of slow paced, something a little sad and angsty, but would show KakaSaku slowly but surely falling in love.

Idk if you’ve noticed but a lot of my fics, the pairings don’t change each other dramatically. They accept each other as they are and then they grow with together. Like that acceptance is something i just love writing, its so subtle, it isn’t something you declare. Its simply “I am going to love you. I am going to love you despite your flaws and faults. I am going to love you unconditionally because I know you, I understand you, and there is nothing you could do to drive me away.”

The fic kind of wrote itself after that first scene. I kept going back to the rain, go being ghosts, and resurrection, and the small epiphanies one gets. I wanted to focus on each character’s growth with each other. They didn’t find light in life because of each other, but with each other. And i think that’s my favorite thing about that fic.

I wanted something raw and real and just something beautiful. I’m actually really proud of it tbh. Would i go back and rewrite/edit it? Oh of course! I’d do that with every single one of my fics, but i’m not gonna cause i think its in its rawest form right now. :))))

ask me shit plz

#silly things from silly friends

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matildaofoz · 3 years

Text

The Invisible Itch Pt. 2 (Demon!Michael x Reader)

Summary: Michael introduces himself after last night and you find yourself on the short end of the proverbial stick by your own doing, no less. Demons don't play nice and Michael puts you firmly into place.

A/N: This is a little interlude to the next part of this series, no smut just yet I'm afraid but plenty of dominant Demon!Michael. He's so much fun to write and the back-and-forth between him and the reader are some of my favourites.

Warnings: Cursing, Power-Play, minor violence and hurt (reader-receiving), mentions of smut

Word Count: 2.4k

Tag List: @prophecy-is-inevitable @jimmlangdon @drasangel @leatherduncan @sexwon131 @rocketgirl2410 @9layerdevilfoodcake @vulgarprayer @michaellangdonstanaccount @michaellandgons-sunshine @iwillboilyourteeth @michael-langdon-owns-my-soul, @kitty4860

After you'd awoken the night after an encounter you couldn't begin to make sense of, you had quite literally grabbed whatever your hands could reach out the wardrobe and sprinted out the door, not daring to even enter the bathroom. You felt whatever, whoever had introduced himself the night before lingering in the place you called your home and that knot in your stomach wound tighter as the day went on. You were going insane. Surely, for the truth of the matter meant that there were forces in this world - and apparently in your apartment - that you couldn't fathom.

You needed answers and so you began to scour the Internet, not caring if your work search history took a weird turn. You still felt his fingers between your legs, his teeth on your shoulder and his grip on your hip. God, the way he had pleasured you was unlike anything you'd ever felt. You tried to shake the lustful thoughts flitting through your mind, the image of him standing before you burned into your retinas.

Demon. That word kept popping up on the websites and subreddits you found and you swore you felt those strong hands on you again as you read page after page of first person accounts with the supernatural. The more you read, the more you became alarmed, mentions of people having unwittingly sold their soul to the devil himself despite not believing in these kinds of things. If this was any other time, you would have scoffed at the idiotic posts. And yet here you were, baring the bruises of something you couldn't explain. The work day drew to a close far too soon, the day feeling like you spent it in a daze, a thick fog hanging over your mind, visions of him clouding your senses. Maybe you had sold your soul, given it to that man, that demon. That would explain the haze you walked through, that ache between your legs.

"Hey (Y/N), you alright? Anything going on, you didn't seem right today," Cindy from accounting said as you both stepped into the elevator.

"Hm? Oh yeah sorry, I'm just tired I think ," you replied with a little embarrassed smile several seconds after she had turned to address you as the doors slid shut. She mustered you, taking in the slight dark circles under your eyes, apparent because you hadn't even bothered to put on any make up. You forced a smile, not feeling up to any small talk.

"Heard Kevin's been bragging about you two going down to his lake house this weekend. Please tell me that's not true, " she continued and you were glad she didn't mention your appreance.

"He did what?!" you shrieked, now suddenly rattled into the present by her statement.

"Thought as much," Cindy replied, a small chuckle on her lips. You two didn't get to speak often but she was one of the few people in the office who showed her disdain for your manager and his creepy ways openly.

"This is turning out to be an even worse day than it already is," you groaned, making Cindy snicker beside you.

"Just be careful, I know he's all bark and no bite but you wouldn't want to get yourself in any situation," she said, patting you lightly on the shoulder as the elevator doors slid open to reveal the underground parking lot.

"Yeah, definitely won't do that. Thanks for the heads up," you called after her as she stepped out to head to her car, waving at you without turning around. You liked Cindy and her no-nonsense attitude. Too bad you were already in a situation of the supernatural kind. You'd kick Kevin's balls any day if he tried anything. The demon in your flat however was an entirely different beast to tame. If that was even a possibility.

You sat in your car outside your apartment building for a good 10 minutes, looking up at the dark windows, debating on whether or not you wanted to spend the night there. What had gotten into you, a tiny voice in the back of your mind berated you. You weren't scared of horror movies or graveyards, you laughed your way though haunted houses you and your friends went to on Halloween and yet the thought of stepping foot into your safe space suddenly filled you with dread. You could explain all those things away by good editing, special effects and makeup. A real-life demon on the other hand...With a huff you swung open the car door and stepped out into the chilly movember air and headed for the entrance. As you passed under the streetlights, you swore you could feel those eyes of his on you, watching from above.

The lock clicked, unlatching the door. You entered, expecting to come face to face with him and yet you were greeted by silence. You ventured into the kitchen, switching on the lights, back rigged. Empty. Next you headed for the bathroom. It looked as if you'd never even took a bath last night, no wine bottle, no glass on the floor, no water puddles on the ground. Slowly but surely you were beginning to think that you'd had a very vivid dream, one that would definetely warranted a visit to your pyschologist, and somehow managed to bump your hip and scratch your shoulder. It made no sense. You knew you were being watched as you stepped out the car. God, maybe you were finally at your breaking point, brought around by nothing in particular, you just simply snapped.

You ventured into your bedroom to change out of your clothes. The note...was gone. You swore you'd left in laying on your covers. After several minutes of franticall searching under the covers and around the bed, you gave up. Maybe your breakup was fianlly catching up with you in an unusual way or maybe it was the loneliness. Whatever it was, all that remained of last night were the bruises. You changed into an oversized t-shirt and some cotton shorts, examining the blueish imprints on your hips. Perhaps you had gotten so drunk last night that you'd simply not remembered hitting your hip and this morning, still drunk your brain had conjured up the note just as it has the demon that fucked you raw in the bathtub last night.

Having let your guard down at finding nothing out of the ordinary, you padded into the living room, your phone in hand that was currently reinstalling tinder. Might as well get back in the game if I'm dreaming up hot demon bathtub sex, you thought to yourself.

You switched on the light, revealing the demon from last night perched lazily on the sofa, looking at you with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"MOTHERFUCKER!" you screamed, dropping your phone. So much for not being scared.

"Good evening to you too, (Y/N)" he chuckled, taking in your frightened expression, those pretty (Y/E/C) eyes of yours ripped wide open.

"What are YOU doing here?" you hissed, trying to calm your heart that was currently in overdrive. He wasn't real, he wasn't supposed to be real.

"What do you mean what am I doing here. Didn't we assess last night that this is my domain? I should be asking you that question, Angel," he retorted, that grin of his widening into a dashing smile, his awsner punctuated by a wink that shouldn't have the effect it had on you.

"S-so this, last night, this was all real?" you whispered with your hands gesturing around you, disbelief in your voice and realisation flitting over your face.

"Oh it was real. A demon fucking that sweet little cunt of yours. Very real and very enjoyable I might add," he rumbled, hia brazen words making your cheeks flush. You stood in the door flabbergasted.

"I'm Michael by the way. I didn't get to introduce myself properly last night since you passed out. Not to worry, I take it as a compliment of my expertise," he winked once more.

You watched him as he revealed why you couldn't remember getting out the tub or falling asleep. So he was a demon. A spawn of satan. Your mind went back to all the things you'd read earlier about his kind, that knot in your stomach suddenly coiling in on itself.

"Did I sell my soul to you last night?!" The words spilled over your lips, your (Y/E/C) gaze shooting daggers at the demon who looked more bemused by the second, taking in your flustered appearance. He hadn't expected you to be so straightforward.

"No, you'd know if you did," he smirked, tapping his chin, a cocky smile on his lips as he watched you deflate slightly. You didn't dare breathe a sigh of relief yet.

"This is like if you're a cop, you have to tell me. You can't lie, you can twist the truth but you can't outright lie," you responded, not satisfied by his half answer.

"Oh, we've been hitting the books at work today? Smart girl," he chuckled. You hadn't done nearly enough research to know the pile of proverbial shit you had landed in unknowingly, but you had done enough between work meetings and over your lunch break to know that a demon was bound by whatever force held them to this plane that made it impossible for them to lie if called upon directly. Your hands clenched by your sides, waiting for his reply. He groaned at your resoluteness. You were a lot smarter than you knew and he was growing impatient with the incessant line of questioning. Usually it was him with one hand on the lever.

"Sweet (Y/N)," he inhaled deeply. "You didn't sell your soul to me last night. It's still firmly sat behind your ribcage, all yours. I'd swear on my heart if I had one. I do have integrity, you know. Are you satisfied now?" He sneered, watching your face as he waited for your reply, one eyebrow cocked expectantly, a hint of offense on his features. You sighed in relief at his statement.

"Thank God," you breathed. At least some of what you'd found on various internet sites and reddit threads seemed to be true. At the name, Michael's eyes darkened and he stood up to his full height from the sofa. Your spine straightened as he approached you, his demeanour growing even sourer.

"Don't mention him in my presence," he rumbled, coming to stand before you, the tips of his pristine parent leather boots touching your bare toes. Had he approached you like this when you had entered your apartment, you would've shrunk back but your little research endeavours had struck a hint of Gold, a fact that had emboldened you as much as his admission that he infact a demon. You wanted to try and see what else you could use against him. Resolute, you stood your ground, neck slightly tilted back to meet his gaze. He may have scared you just now but you were not one to back down, for better or worse.

"God," you uttered again, watching his eyes grow dark, an inky blackness swallowing his blue irises.

Michael tilted his head to one side, those shadows starting to creep up behind him like they had last night. A silent warning.

"Jesus Christ," you continued to test him.

"(Y/N)..." his voice rumbled low out his chest, and the depth of it sent shivers down your spine.

"In the name of the father, the son and the hol-" His right arm shot up and he grabbed you by the throat roughly, cutting off your breath before you could finish the sentence. In the blink of an eye you were pressed between the wall, Michael's hand around your throat pinning you in place.

"Shut your fucking mouth or I'll do it for you," he hissed, his body pressed firmly over yours, his black gaze burning into you, and a searing pain exploded behind them. You screamed in terror and anguish as it felt like he was burning your eyes out their sockets.

"FUCK, I'M SORRY, I'LL STOP, PLEASE!" you cried, your vision going blurry from pain and tears that had begun to spill out the corners. At your cries, Michael's hand loosened the grip around your neck and stepped back. You slid down the wall at the loss of his body holding you up, gulping in air, fingers gingerly touching the skin around your eyes, afraid they would come up bloody. Unbothered, Michael watched as you regained control over your breathing, mustering you with a hint of disdain. He crouched down before you, making you press yourself against the wall in an effort to keep the distance between you.

"Don't ever think you're smarter than me, little one. Test me again and you'll see. I dare you," he chuckled, one hand catching your quivering chin in his hold to assess the damage he'd done. Only several small burst blood vessels bloomed in the whites of your eyes. Nothing permanent and yet enough to remind you that you were in his domain, abiding by his rules.

"Now that we've established who's in charge once again, why dont you tell me about your day? I took the liberty of getting some wine," he said, any trace of anger or demonic demeanour wiped from his chiseled features, that small smile playing on the corners of his lips again. He was psychotic or just simply demonic, that little voice in th back of your head whispered while you watched him, the back of your head and shoulders pressed into the wall.

He offered you his hand to help you off the floor, as if the last minutes had never taken place. You debated whether or not to refuse but seeing as how you were on the much shorter end of the stick firmly in his grasp, you took his hand and were hoisted up to your feet by Michael. You recoiled from his grasp as soon as you were steady on your feet, eyeing him warily. Alcohol sounded like a good idea even though you wanted to keep your wits about you around him. There was no doubt in your mind now about who it was you were dealing with and this was far worse than you'd anticipated and yet it didn't seem like you had much choice. Your lease wouldn't run out for another 6 months and there was no way you'd go back to your best friend's couch.

“Why the hell not,” you muttered, earning yourself a gleeful grin from the handsome devil before you.

“I knew you'd come around, Angel,” he grinned, those hooded icy blue eyes glinting.

#michael langdon x reader #michael langdon x you #michael langdon #demon!michael #ahs apocalypse

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dumb-hat · 3 years

Text

Character Sheet - Evander Winsome

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Rules: Things in brackets are meant only as guidelines, to be erased and your answers written in place of. Things separated by | are for bolding and italicising.

Tagged by: No one! I saw this reblogged by @mooglemeet, so I went ahead and grabbed it directly from @bluespiritfire. Link to the blank template is up above! Tagging: No one specific/anyone who wants to. Feel free to tag me back so I can see it!

Name: Evander Winsome Age: 26 Pronouns: He/him Birthdate: 12th Sun of the 5th Umbral Moon

~~PLACE OF ORIGIN~~ Race: Hyur From the First: Interracial heritage:

Hometown/city: Limsa Lominsa Current residence/popular haunt:Ul’dah

~~APPEARANCE~~

Favourite/commonly used clothes:

Any difficulties with magical/physical disciplines? Nothing in particular

~~RELATIONSHIPS~~ Parents/Legal Guardian/Parental Figure: mother | father | aunt and/or uncle | grandparents | adoptive | foster | mentor | family friend/godparents | other Siblings: One older brother; deceased Children: None that he knows of Romantic: single | unrequited | crushing | dating | engaged | married | divorced/separated | widow/widower | recently split | it’s complicated (I mean, not to him. To him, it makes total sense. Well, most of it does.) | other (…) Friends: Evander tends to befriend and trust people fairly easily, though it can take him a bit to really open up. Once you’ve hit that point, you’ve likely got a friend for life. Rivals/Enemies: To the best of his knowledge, he’s left these all behind somewhere or other, thanks largely to his restless need to wander. That said, there’s surely a few lurking in the past and there’s always room for more, of course!

Any special gestures of affection they have with people in their life? He’ll often make complaining noises about paying for drinks and dinner, but he’ll do it every time and would be slightly hurt if people didn’t let him.

How are they dealing with the most prominent of the above? How does it affect their in day-to-day life, if at all? Poorly, typically.

~~ODDS AND ENDS~~ Notable Weapons He doesn’t have any particular bond with any of his weapons, really. He sees them as tools, and ones that he uses only reluctantly. He sometimes enjoys tinkering with the ones he builds, but that’s more of a hobby than anything.

Notable Mounts He has various vehicles and machines he likes to fuss over and drive around, but he’s particularly fond of his SDS Fenrir.

In addition to his chocobo—a particularly stubborn beast named Doreen—he’s also fond of his battlesheep, Doctor One and a colossal crab he’s dubbed St. Barnabus.

Notable Minion/s Besides Doctor One and St. Barnabas, Evander is especially fond of various clockworks, automata, wind-ups and models that he’s put together. His favorite is a drone modeled after a Magitek bit that he’s named Valencia.

Keepsakes/Mementos

A pendant in the shape of a swan, a few too many flasks

Chronic Illnesses or Disabilities Evander lives with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. I’ve written about it a few places, most notably at length here and in brief here. How do they deal with these? Depends on the day, really. This isn’t really a thing he has a name for, so it’s not a thing he can easily address. He’s got a sloppily slapped together set coping mechanisms that work about half the time, if he’s lucky. Other than that, he mostly hopes for good days full of things he can convince himself he’s interested in.

Education Level He likes it when people underestimate him, so he’s not always quick to admit to the formal Ishgardian education afforded to him by the family that took him in when he left Limsa Lominsa. He’ll often try to pass it off as eclectic, self-driven studies... Which, admittedly, also played a big part in shaping him.

Habits There’s a lot of excess in his life. He drinks too much. He eats too much. He stays up too late, too long, and then sleeps too late, too long. He’s almost always got a flask or four on his person, and he often finds that he’s picking up the dinner or drink tab wherever he goes.

Other Nothing immediately springs to mind, but I’m sure there’s like a dozen things I should put here. This thing has been sitting in my drafts for god-knows-how-long, so I’m just glad to finally get it out there.

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