#that comment is not weird at all. in fact it's extremely vulnerable and loving

[myhumanweakness]

I just wanted to point out that this:

makes this statement: 

more weighted. 

[clay-pidgeon]

vriska + equius’ relationship (i say relationship bc its platonic but idk if i can call it friendship without adding 8+ disclaimers about alternian society) is genuinely so important to me. i need to talk about this more

vriska is the thief of light. she steals light/narrative relevancy for herself, creating darkness/irrelevancy for others in turn. she injures (UNDERSTATEMENT) both of the characters that equius is shown to give bodies/prosthetics for (INCLUDING HERSELF THRU KARMA BULLSHIT.) equius the heir of void is extremely important (something vriska craves) in the form of being part of le/doc scratch, 3/4 of the kids birthdays being in sagutarrius, + dirk being somewhat modeled off him iirc. probably more stuff. also the fact they both have the addiction is a powerful thing line and they both habitually break things. also they have opposite relationships with their lusus (READ THE VRISKY BUSINESS PARADOX SPACE COMIC) they are Parallels on some level its so interesting

and thats just like meta shit their ACTUAL RELATIONSHIP is fucking awesome. their thing is mainly about collabing on aradias soulbot but both of them plan to backstab the other and give it to aradia themself to uhhh get in her good graces i think? in their only 1on1 conversation as far as i know equius’s general tone comes off as…not PATRONIZING but the vibe that hes just entertaining her shit because means to an end shit is clear. he says “make them envy our nobility” implying that he thinks of vriska on some level in the same group as him. which is TRUE theyre neighbors and ceruleans and indigos are the only ones you can rly call highbloods and arent clearly classed somehwere else bc the other 3 highblood castes are clown gang and Fish. and equius openly doesnt rly like seadwellers

anyways back to their actual conversation equius clearly doesnt hold much AFFECTION for vriska but he does put up with her! they dont seem to actually like each other as much as theyre like. allies. means to an end. my weird neighbor whos kinda creepy but is too valuable to actually stop interacting with. vriska likes messing around with him but equius just goes “D—> Stop” and she does it! (also i just remembered that in one of the authors notes andrew hussie says its possible she has a crush on him in which is so fucking funny. irrelevant to this specific thing but holy SHIT thats fucking hilarious) in general equius goes “yeah. yeah. stop. sure” in RESPONSE to stuff vriska says, not reallt bringing up any topics of his own interest

except for at the end: he brings up that he built her metal arm, and vriska does her thing where her sentences look like algebra problems because of all the 8s in them where they shouldnt be, and on the next page vriska slaps herself using her robot arm, which is a one off gimmick but does that mean that equius can control her arm???? what the fuuuuck haha anyways vriska is obviously not a person who likes owing people stuff no shit sherlock.

vriska going to equius for her robot arm is also the main focus of “vrisky business” a paradox space comic thats fucking wonderful. i love it so much. vriska and equius’ relationship is much like the “8lah 8lah 8lah” “D—> Ok” one i mentioned in the last paragraph where equius is simply entertaining the whims of someone he views as lesser, but not lesser enough to be weird about it. vriska pretends she hasnt been mortally injured (saying she stubbed her arm and leg like one would a toe) but is also like a little vulnerable (possibly because of the Blood Loss) stating itd be nice to have a lusus like aurthor who actually serves equius and doesnt eat kids, being way more self deprecating than is decidedly Vriskesque, etc. equius says they dont have many interests in common and also that vriska is lesser than him. at the end, right after her aurthor comment, she admits shes jealous of him and collapses . this is a gross oversimplification read vrisky business here its so good (note this is the preview on the website theres like a continuation on imgur here but i didnt include that bc i just found out about it and didnt want to make this paragraph too long. its here tho its so good)

when arquius happens, vriska Very Obviously fucking LOVES the guy. she says this many many times in no uncertain terms: this guy is AWESOME and Team Vriska forever. which is fair shoutout to arquius. also its implied she has a crush on him which again. so funny. these two are great. not much to say here that i havent already so ill just say theyre awesome again

this post is too long for its own fucking good. tldr equius and vriska are so friends in such an interesting way and i love it

[kckenobi]

Five Favorite Fics

I was tagged by @meantforinfinitesadness to list my top five favorite fics that I’ve ever written! Hmm okay let's see...

(1) Rhapsody in Blue: my orchestra au, in which Obi-Wan, Anakin, etc. are professional musicians who also get wrapped up in a crime situation because of course they do

This one is my favorite for a lot of reasons, but one of which is just the fact that I did it entirely for myself. I didn't post chapters until I'd written the entire thing start to finish, so I was my own audience the whole time, and it felt like I was,,,,,idk, telling myself a comforting bedtime story every night during a really weird time in my life. Which I guess is sort of what writing fic is actually lol

(2) Bloodlines: in which Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Dooku are trapped together on Tatooine and have to collaborate to survive.

This one was just a lot of fun, and it was the biggest fic project I'd undertaken at the time. So that was neato.

(3) holes (collab with @katierosefun!): in which Maul manages to kill Anakin.

Okay in all honestly, I genuinely don't reread this one because it makes me cry!!!! I remember writing this with Caroline and like, crying while typing and accidentally wiping my eye with popcorn butter which made it all worse lmao. But this one's special to me because it was actually the first time in recent memory that I cried while writing, and it was because of my lovely co-author who just moved my heart :'))

(4) When the Music Stops: in which everyone goes to space prom AHEM I mean a Senatorial Ball, and Obi-Wan and Satine have some angsty slow dancing before sad things happen.

This one just always makes the list. It was so fun to write, and I have some fond mems of brainstorming with @lightasthesun :'))

(5) Everything, In the Air: in which I wrote a very niche fic about codywan and pandemic anxiety

This one isn't even necessarily my best writing, but I'm putting it on the list because i wrote it to get through a series of really hard days, and it was the first time I'd actually tried to write the internal dialogue of anxiety I guess? Like most of the time when I have an anxious character, it's easier for me to just write it from the point of view of someone else, to describe what it looks like instead of what it feels like. So this one was vulnerable, and hard, but I got some extremely kind comments from people who got it, and so it's special to me :')

No-pressure tags for some awesome writers: @pandora15 @giggles-and-freckles @katierosefun @stolen-pen-name23 @calltomuster @tessiete @the-last-kenobi

[darckcarnival]

Darck Headcanon

-->Sunglasses

The fact Darck always wear the same god damn pair of purple sunglasses is for a few reasons. It is arguably one of the most iconic features and accessories she owns, and wears, everywhere. Even indoors, and in the dead of a pitch black night. Those shades have never once not been on her. At least, in the past many years. It was not always that way however.

Even as a kid it was well known that she liked accessories, he is sunglasses she stole from a brother or her mother, or loving her own hats so often, wearing with her hair pulled through the snap back section, or any other way. However, after Darck was taken and turned into the half vampire she is now, the need for sunglasses, or goggles grew.

Light sensitivity. A natural vampiric trait.

Extremely bright light can seriously hinder the woman at times, easily causing headaches, ruining her sharp senses, and even stinging or scrambling every single sense she has if a flash bang goes off in her face. So, with this new found weakness, sunlight on bright summer days could easily make her constantly squinting, and ruin the sharpness of her higher eye sight. So she often times had classic sunglasses, or her uniform's old goggles when still under the command of her Sire. In younger years she never had those purple sunglasses, but god did she envy people who had cool colored sunglasses, this was not something she hid either. Would out right comment on it through the years. 'Those are cool as hell.'

The purple sunglasses never came into being until Darck had been abandoned by the sire that had turned her, and then she was traveling with Alvin.

The man knew her better than anyone, remembered who she was when they were both kids, and the taste for weird. So it was him who got her the small tool tinkering kit, that started her on working with small things. Followed by a few glasses frame styles. But only ever one set of purple lenses. 'I know your favorite colors are purples.' And Darck adored this.

She was admittedly, influenced for the round style from old school movies, and old school comics- but her sire also had the small circle lenses style, black our mirror sunglasses they were. And these three details influenced her sense of style and wants badly. Thus, Darck had made her own purple sunglasses, thanks to the kit she was gifted so many years ago.

The sunglasses she wears now are still the same frames from so long ago. Has maintained, repaired, and adjusted them as needed. The lenses have had to be fixed more than once, but the original ones are always kept, melted down, and reformed into new purple lenses with whatever new bits she needs to use. The sunglasses she had now were created by Darck's own two hands, with her light sensitivity in mind and sense of style she loves so much. God help you if you break them or touch them without her trusting you, you will see a sudden wrath, or protective instinct.

Now comes the side effect of her having worn these sunglasses so often, not just for style, or comfort...

The purple lenses help hide her emotions behind them when she needs to. Darck feels safer lying through her teeth of how she is, or how she feels on things if needed. Sure, Darck is honest and will help you, absolutely. But any deeply personal matters? Those sunglasses are used as a shield to protect herself from the outside world, and be so much harder to read. It makes it a lot easier to put up an act if Darck ever needs to... Eyes are the windows to the soul after all.

Yet, should she ever remove them for you, meet your eyes with hazel brown and be exposed? Or trust someone enough to let them remover them? Then that is a silent show of trust and vulnerability that no one may ever really understand without her actually saying it out loud. So few people have ever got to see her without sunglasses in a calm or passive setting.

If you do? Treasure it and realize she trusts you more than she admits.

[snakeho]

2/13/23 6:45AM

it’s my birthday and i’m miserable. i miss the days when i used to be sad because i thought i was ugly fat unattractive and no one would ever love me cause honestly those problems seemed manageable and solvable back then. i did the thing, i had the boyfriend and it was nice but it didn’t make me feel shiny and new and fixed. on the contrary, it made me super anxious and insecure about myself and whether i could even have a proper relationship. so much of that relationship was spent being uncomfortable in the silences, and constantly worrying that i was too boring and personality-less to ever keep someone’s interest for the rest of our lives. i’m extremely uncomfortable with the silences in general now. every word that comes out of my mouth feels foreign to me, like i’m glad that something, anything was able to be conjured up in my brain but why’d it have to be that? i don’t understand how i’ve made any friends in life, how i didn’t realize until i was forced to spend alone time with someone i was supposed to confide everything in, how opinionless and boring and memory-less i truly am. i can’t believe i’m missing something so fundamentally human from the human experience. it makes so much sense why i’ve always felt weird and different and emotionless and why it’s so hard for me to be social and make friends. sharing stories between humans is like the primary reason language even developed, and i have 0 stories to share cause i can’t remember any of them. if i do remember it, it’s a list of facts that come to me as i tell the story, resulting in a jumbled word salad mess of a story that (to me at least) makes it so obvious that i have the social skills of a child raised by wolves. i’ve always been the funny friend cause all that i have is the present moment, something in my environment that i can comment on and make a joke about and hopefully make people laugh enough that they don’t realize i’m not revealing anything about myself besides maybe my basic likes/dislikes. but that doesn’t cut it anymore. i’m an adult and people need something more to sink their teeth into, people need proper connection and i’m too scared to be vulnerable and offer any of myself up for scrutiny. who the fuck wants to be friends with someone who only offers how much their mind is a prison as their anecdotal stories? i feel like something is irreparably wrong with me, and i don’t think i can ever love myself enough to forgive these deficiencies.

[ianschip]

chip.conversation>memory>appeal.levels.exe

Okay chip, you wanted to know my current situation with my sexuality. And my relationship with my appeal levels. Ready yourself for the worst text you’ll receive in your infinite life.

I am witnessing never before seen levels of attraction. Actually impressed. It’s beyond anything I could have planned.

The guy that I stopped talking to because he was in an open relationship sent me a 5 paragraphs long text this week, explaining me why am I so special, telling me he has dreamed non-stop about me. He feels sorry for not breaking up, but if I’m being honest, I would never even be with someone that has the capacity to be inside an open relationship. The line I will not cross. Here’s an extract of what he told me:

My first ex-boyfriend texted me saying enough time has passed and that he wants to meet. He had a golden heart, and that’s what matters the most, so I think I will reply when the time is right.

The guy who was my friend in university, the sweet dude who had a girlfriend back then, had a date with me in my house, it wasn’t only perfect, it was fun, it was really fun, we laughed non-stop and we ended in my bedroom’s floor whispering to each other. I noticed my masculine energy being more dominant inside of me too.

The guy I met when I was possessed by the dancing spirits, found me again and texted me wanting to meet. I won’t. But it was nice to read.

Even strangers, even close friends like Sebastian, even people I barely know, and even people that I dislike like Franklin; it’s a lot to take in.

In one of the many occasions where Karen and I escape my house at 3AM to go dancing with Franklin, he was telling me something that I couldn’t understand so I told him to write it down in my phone. This is what he wrote down:

And I won’t even bring up the forbidden encounters with people I shouldn’t have met in the first place. But it all has led me to conclude that I no longer need to put any effort in being a version of myself to be attractive, the character I’ve built based on reading, writing, exercising, meditating, giving unconditional love and freedom of expression has finally seen the light.

Even my interactions to make business and talk with important men has shifted, I am more confident, I can sustain eye contact with a firm voice to carry my message, leading sometimes to find what I want.

Another weird fact is that multiple people have told me they’ve dreamed of me.

Being humble is not my forte, HAHAHAHAHA so I can proudly say that my soul is polished enough that I can have that effect, I will try to no let it get into my head, but as someone who never acknowledges his charisma, it’s nice to write this text to show appreciation towards myself. I think I’ve earned it, specially after the hospitalization.

•••

Look, here’s the thing, I’m not perfect by any means. In fact, I am incredibly flawed. So here are some things I have been learning along the way: loving strangers, forgiving and admiring.

And my toxic habits… oh, the toxic habits… well they are decreasing. I no longer have a tobacco addiction. But then there’s other types of toxicity, right? Yeah, I checked my ex’s twitter like 2 weeks ago. It was fine because I realized he liked a tweet bashing certain zodiac sign. it said something like “it’s okay if ur a scorpio just dont do it in front of me”, which I thought it was extremely pathetic. The stupid algorithm showed me his art account, I peaked, found a comment by a woman saying she wants her own portrait; foolish to think you’d take place in an account with exclusively male thirst traps; not a single woman, not a single anything else. It reminded me of another tweet I read, “la misma gata rebrandeada”. I really settled when I was at my most suicidal and vulnerable time and when I got better and asked for more it was denied.

And then I blocked the account to never see it again, and I stopped; I didn’t see anything else again. It served me well for the last impression I’ll have of him. One last look at that thing I never want to be.

And I need a schedule, it will fix some other toxic habits. Everything else is going well, economically, romantically and mentally. My psychologist gave me the thumps up to end the therapy process. You know, if your healing journey lasts forever, you’re doing it wrong. But I did it right. Thank God, thank you, universe.

That’s it for now. Happy new year, chip.

Happy 2024! Ian Serratos.

[galacticnova3]

i'd rather be weird about iru than any of your other characters. iru's like a lightning rod. he attracts all the weird comments and absurdists asks so that all your other characters are left alone or otherwise treated with respect!

I just wish left alone didn't mean nobody asked about my other characters… Like yeah I'm glad they haven't been turned into horny person summoning figures, but at the same time it can get tiring only talking about Iru and being asked to explain Iru and getting jokes about Iru and having to delete nsfw asks relating to Iru etc. I wanna talk about the others!

I want to talk about the boat who defaults to talking like she is doing professional email correspondence out of a habit developed due to fear of the consequences of acting or speaking out of turn, despite having once been outgoing and curious and happy to disregard the rules placed upon her if it meant learning more things! I’ve even got a whole blog for her— @reflected-ship — that hasn’t seen activity in ages! I’d love to answer questions about her, normally here or in-character on that blog. She doesn’t understand memes and doesn’t want to and can come off as cold and distant at times, but she’s just extremely anxious and guarded and hasn’t had the sorts of interactions with other people to start to change that yet.

There’s also the boat from one of the most chaotic areas of the universe who is fundamentally different from her counterparts in so many ways and yet sees them almost like family, but has no plans of admitting that outright because she has unaddressed issues related to abandonment and social isolation that she doesn’t want to acknowledge in the hopes they will simply go away on their own without requiring the uncomfortable process of working on them directly! She basically adopted a baby dragon of Landia’s species she found in the void™️ and has become her own kind of boat mom even if she adamantly denies it, and also named the dragon(s) after various weapons. She’s got no crew or pilot but lets a Dark Matter live on board because he’s chill, has nowhere to go, having hands means he can help look after the little one(s).

The Dark Matter mentioned above has been trying to live a normal life on a planet where his kind has earned a reputation of being soulless, destructive monsters, and that fact has made his life harder in so many ways! Some people see him as a threat to be destroyed, while others looked at him as a blank slate they could use as a tool for their own gain based on a misunderstanding of how Zero’s hivemind worked, so he expects to either be despised or treated more akin to an animal than a person. He copes with absurd internet humor and memes and tries to act like he doesn’t care anymore because he expects genuine trust and vulnerability to invite pain, except now he’s living with a fucking magical boat from a different dimension who doesn’t have all these bad expectations for him and he doesn’t know what to think anymore because, fuck, there’s so many kinds of people out there he never knew existed!

Those are just the main three, too! I’ve got plenty of characters I want to talk about and expand on but it’s difficult to do so without some kind of prompting.

[lnkedmyheart]

I agree with what you said about New Jeans. It feels illegal for me to listen to their music and their age just immediately put me off.

And I feel like their weird ass fandom isn't talked about enough. I remember seeing comments on YouTube after someone said their Fandom consisting mostly of old men is weird. Everyone said they were hypocrites and said old women listen to boy groups as well. What they don't get is that most of New Jeans are underage!

It feels so weird for me, a 21 year old woman. I'm not saying anyone listening to their music is a pedo or weirdo, it just makes me feel iffy that a significantly older men are such BIG FANS. Not to mention their Cookie song.

Meanwhile half of the world lost their minds when Blackpink sang Ice Cream even though all of them were consenting adults who most likely knew about the sexual innuendos, but will defend Cookie with their life.

It just makes me feel gross fr. Old men liking underage girl's music?

The kpop industry has always been very... pervy to say the least lol. Plus I heard Min Heejin was spending a lot of time with the members and inviting her over to her house. Min Heejin gives off creep vibes as well. She has been called out for being inappropriate with the younger members of other groups as well.

Sorry for the rant lol, I just had to get it off my chest, I had to tell someone 😩😂

I wouldn't make any assertions against Heejin myself since I don't wanna look the group up or engage in it in any way but I wouldn't be surprised if the accusations but I do follow everglow-up and she made a video on Heejin.

And that's fine, get it off your chest all you want. Kpop has always sexualized and commodified idols. Be it men or women, we just talk about women more because they are usually more vulnerable. How many idol groups come up where the under age member is also included into sexy choreo be it boys or girls. The industry promotes the idea of the idols being free real estate for fans who want them to be their gfs and bfs. Idols are put in uncomfy clothes and situations and more. The fact that the industry has become so comfortable debuting an entire group of kids of whom all bar 1 are actual legal minors and debuted them with a song like cookie of all things...

And yea it's true older men love the more innocent sweet gg concepts, they're the demure ideal types. Also the industry is literally thriving off of idols being sexualised, the growing popularity and normalization of fapcams for instance. And just the fandom making the whole selling point of the group their innocence and purity. It makes me ill.

And the girls are so talented, I just don't understand how they even thought debuting minors in such an exploitative industry was a good idea. Wonyoung hasn't had a moment to breathe since she debuted, Hyuna made a literal song about the industry wanting her to be extremely young and her regretting it, a bunch of idols talked about the sheer exploitation, many leaders in their 20s have talked about how hard it was to protect their members against the company and Aespa recently got sexually harassed at a school. But no, instead let's talk about how it's so nice and refreshing to see such "pure innocent" girls who aren't fake. 🤢 Like fuck off with that creepy misogynistic commentary.

[iamdeku]

Needy: Bakugou Katsuki x Reader

Me? Making a fic title that isn’t based off a song somehow? Seems unlikely. 

Warnings: school stress. makin’ out. not proofread.

For @sems-diarie

You hated your classmate Bakugou Katsuki with a passion. He was arrogant, brash, and extremely loud. He was rude to you and he was rude to everybody else and he was completely convinced he was the greatest thing to ever exist. There was really only one thing you hated more than Bakugou.

Being teamed up with him for your class’s newest group project.

You had pleaded and begged with Aizawa to let you pair up with literally anyone else, but he was unyielding. All of his pairings were final, and you and Bakugou were no exception. You were just going to have to learn how to work with him, your grades be damned, apparently.

“Alright, listen up,” you said, taking your seat next to Bakugou the day after your group pairings had been announced. “You are not going to mess up my grades. If anyone is going to mess up my grades it’s going to be me. I don’t think you’re an idiot. I know you’re an idiot. So just sit down, shut up, and follow my lead.”

You were perhaps slightly harsher than necessary, even for a guy like Bakugou. In your defense though, you’d had a truly garbage day. Your coffee machine had broken, leaving you with no caffeine this morning. It was an expensive coffee machine too, and you weren’t sure when you would be able to buy a new one. You had spent half of your morning looking for the manual to the coffee machine in the hopes that Momo could just create another one for you, and by the time you realized what time it was you had no opportunity to do anything but toss your clothes on before heading to class. On your way to class, it had rained, soaking you through because you had forgotten your umbrella and provoking Mineta to make a comment on the clinginess of your wet uniform. You had gotten a worse grade than you were expecting on your last test, you had tripped and spilled all of your lunch across the floor, and now here you were, having to sit next to your assigned group partner, hair still damp and mood still very, very bad.

“Hey, I don’t know who you think you are extra, but I’m no idiot. If you think we’re not beating everybody else in this class, then you’re wrong. I don’t know what you’ve been told, but Bakugou Katsuki never loses.”

You had known the great Bakugou Katsuki for the last 3 years of yours and his UA career, and now, in your final year, you were pretty confident that you still knew him. You knew him as a guy who had definitely lost before in the past. There was no particular shame in that, but you couldn’t afford to lose this time, especially not on Katsuki’s account.

“You better be right about that, pretty boy, because this grade is important to me. If we get a bad grade on this assignment it’s going to throw off my entire average, which I really can’t afford right now. Speaking of which, we really don’t have the time for all this dilly-dallying. Let’s get to work, king explosion murder,” you mocked.

To your surprise, the ever confident Bakugou turned bright red at the old nickname.

“Whatever. Let’s just get to work. We’re going to have to trade contact information so we can figure out a time to meet up. Plus I don’t trust you not to screw this up without my advice.”

You rolled your eyes. The nerve of this boy. The sheer gall.

“Yeah, okay, whatever.” You reached into your soggy backpack and pulled out a pencil and a piece of paper, scribbling down your phone number.

“We should just be able to meet up in one of the dorm’s common areas. The trick will be finding a time when everyone else isn’t working there.”

You sighed, knowing your classmates wouldn’t make the scheduling of this easy. Even ignoring the fact that you might have to deal with their noise and obnoxious planning, Bakugou’s sleep schedule was another barrier to your project design. He went to bed early enough to severely limit your time for working on the group project. You honestly didn’t know when he found the time for homework. If you didn’t do yours immediately it probably wouldn’t get done until the very last minute.

“We can just study in our rooms. It will be quieter there.” Bakugou shrugged.

You froze at his casual words. Study in your rooms? As in study in his room? Nobody had ever been invited into Bakugou’s room. Not his best friend Kirishima. Not his childhood rival Midoriya. Not even that girl from the gen-ed course he’d dated when you were second years. Nobody.

“Uh…are you sure?”

“Yeah. Why?” He raised an eyebrow at you. “You’re making a weird face, idiot.”

You shook your head. “Nothing. I was just thinking. Yeah, we can just study in our rooms. Just text me before randomly showing up, okay?”

“Yeah, whatever.”

Aizawa was starting up class, causing you both to shut up. You felt a part of you get very excited that you might be about to see Bakugou’s room. There was something sort of forbidden to the feeling, fluttering around in your chest like a stupid flock of butterflies or something. You were sure it was just the appeal of his room, the secrecy of it all. You loved knowing other people’s secrets. That must have been what it was.

As it turned out though, your hopes and dreams were all in vain. Bakugou texted you to ask about studying, not in his room, but your room. You complied of course. As much as you wanted to see the inside of his mysterious room, you respected his privacy. After all, rooms were sacred. Your room was a deeply personal expression of yourself, and you weren’t about to pry into his space. It wouldn’t get you a better grade anyway, seeing as your project wasn’t on the inside of Bakugou’s room.

You had cleaned up your room earlier in preparation for this moment, anticipating that sooner or later Bakugou would want to study in your room even if you had briefly entertained hopes that he would want to study in his. Your normally messy desk was cleared off, your bed was made and your dirty laundry was all in the basket where it belonged. If you hadn’t cleaned the room yourself you would probably think that you didn’t live here.

Bakugou walked into the room with all the posturing of royalty, shoulders thrown back confidently as he eyed your room. He sniffed, passing whatever final judgement he would, and proceeded to sit down at your desk.

“Nice room, nerd. Cleaner than I thought it would be.”

You grew uncomfortably warm at the truth of his accusation, feeling specifically called out. Could he possibly have heard you vacuuming earlier? It didn’t matter. You didn’t care about his opinion.

“Yeah, whatever. Let’s just get to work, shall we?”

You pulled out your notebook, taking a seat on the floor and gesturing for him to join you.

“Why are you sitting on the floor, idiot?”

“I don’t have two chairs for both of us to work at the desk, so therefore the floor is our next best option.”

“No it isn’t.” Bakugou rolled his eyes. “You have a bed, don’t you? We can just sit on your bed and that way you don’t have to break you tailbone on the floor. Unless you like sitting on the hard floor.”

You gritted your teeth, glaring up at the challenge.

You pushed off from your hand, standing so you could loom over where he sat at your desk. “Fine. Bed it is then.”

You took a seat on your bed as he stood up from your desk chair he had invited himself to sit in. You waited for him to take his spot next to you on the bed, but he hesitated. For a guy who had suggested this idea, he didn’t seem to like it very much. Your surprise wore off though when you realized that he was being…awkward. Bakugou Katsuki was being awkward.

Was it you? Had you done something to make him uncomfortable? Or had he just been shy this whole time?

You could have laughed at him, but instead you took pity. You remembered your first year, when you had been painfully awkward. Maybe Bakugou had always been like that and you had just never had occasion to notice until now.

“Go ahead,” you said, patting the bed next to you. “Take a seat. I don’t bite, and even if I did you would like it.”

You laughed a little bit at your own joke, even if Bakugou didn’t seem to think it was very funny. You did succeed in getting him to sit on the bed though, so some small victories were won. He was stiff and sat much farther away from you than necessary, but he sat nonetheless.

After hours of working together, you managed to have a rough outline for the project. It was sort of a tricky project, based around gathering knowledge and making a presentation on the hero you thought to be the best. Bakugou had insisted with surprising vehemence on making it on All Might, and you agreed with him. After all, he was the symbol of peace and had been the #1 hero for decades. Even though this was a move you would have predicted more from Midoriya, you figured if you were going to do this project you might as well do it right.

Bakugou got up to head to bed, but you stopped him before he could leave. “Hey…I didn’t know you were so into All Might.”

Bakugou blushed, nervously scratching the back of his head.

“I mean, we all love All Might, don’t we?”

“I mean, I know I do.” You laughed a little to set him at ease before revealing a little bit of yourself. “When I was a kid All Might was always my favorite hero because of his smile. I always thought that if someone were ever to come save me, I would want them to smile at me like that.”

Bakugou was silent for a moment, thinking about your words.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I was always so impressed by his strength, and the way people loved him. I always wanted to be loved like that. I wanted to make people believe that I could help them. That they could trust me.”

There was a deep sense of vulnerability to his words that made you want to know more and made you want to understand this boy you had clearly underestimated.

“Is that why you became a hero?”

He huffed, retreating back into himself.  “I became a hero to prove I was better than everybody.”

In a way, it was a yes.

“Have a goodnight, Bakugou.”

He stopped in your doorway, looking back at you with a hint of that vulnerability from earlier.

“Goodnight.”

You had been working nonstop for the past 4 days. You had your schedule set up to an unreasonable level of strictness. You would work for an hour, watch a 10 minute motivational video, then work for an hour again. The only real breaks you took were to eat and sleep, and it was starting to wear on you. You just had so much work to do, and you needed to be free this weekend for the sleepover Mina was having, but you were exhausted.

You had finally reached a breaking point tonight, and you found yourself sitting in your bed crying. You weren’t pretty crying either. It was an ugly, exhausted cry, yanked out of you by the hours of work and stress. You had fallen onto your side, curled up in bed as the sounds choked out of you, ugly things breaking you open and cracking your chest and your voice.

Because of all the stress you had been under, you had completely forgotten about your group project. You had met up with Bakugou the first couple of days, but yesterday you had begged off and reschedule for…today. Right now.

You didn’t even hear Bakugou’s polite knock on your door, the same three knock rap he had given the last few days before coming in to work on your project with you for an hour. If he thought you were ignoring him or just not there, it didn’t stop him from coming in. You didn’t notice, completely oblivious to his presence until he spoke.

“Are you hurt?”

He rushed over to your side, rolling over your body to inspect you. His hands were surprisingly gentle as they skimmed over your body, checking for injuries, gently pressing into the divots of old scars. He found no hurt on you though, and pulled back, frowning.

“What’s the matter? Why are you crying?”

You sniffled loudly, shamefully wiping your arm across your face.

“I’m fine,” you reassured him, repeating it for your own benefit. “I’m fine, I’m totally fine. Everything is fine.”

“You sound like stupid Deku. Every time he’s ever told me he was fine he was lying.”

You choked out a giggle against your will. “Yeah, he does that doesn’t he?”

“Yeah, he does. But unlike Deku you’re not stupid. You want to explain this little episode to me?”

“I’m just…stressed.” You sighed, explaining your situation to him.

He sat back, stunned. “Well no wonder you finally broke. Nobody can work like that. You have to have fun, you idiot!”

For such a nice sentiment, he said it awfully aggressively. He almost made you burst into tears again, but he seemed to realize his mistake, quickly softening his voice again as he floundered for something to say.

“I…you…I’ve never seen you cry before,” he said.

“Yeah, well, I do it. This may come as a surprise but I’m human too, y’know.”

His hands still rested on your thighs, and you looked up at him hesitantly, breath catching in your throat. You had, of course, noticed that he was pretty before. Sharp cheek bones, harsh blond hair, bright red eyes that dug into your soul. Somehow though, he had gotten prettier over the past couple of days as you had gotten to know him, gotten to understand him better.

Before, you had thought he was arrogant. From your conversations though, you knew better. He just cared about people too much. Cared about their opinions too much, feared rejection. You offered up a little piece of yourself in exchange for everything he had admitted to you.

“Remember what I told you about All Might being my favorite hero? I thought to be a good hero you had to always be smiling. You could never show weakness. Not anger or sadness or anything else. That’s why you’ve never seen me cry before. Why I’m always so happy go lucky. Because I have to be.”

There was a pause while Bakugou processed that information.

“That’s…stupid,” he decided. “You shouldn’t hold back on your emotions like that. You deserve to feel things. You can’t dedicate your life to other people like that.”

“Yeah, I know. I’m starting to figure that out.” You stared down at your bedspread.

You were shocked when you felt a warm, calloused hand brush your cheek. Bakugou hesitantly, tenderly wiped the last of your tears away, and you felt something in your heart flutter. You had known Bakugou Katsuki a long time, but you had never known him like this. Looking up into his eyes did nothing to dispel your butterflies when you saw how soft his gaze was. Something in you ached to be looked at like that, to be held in someone’s hands as carefully as he was holding you now.

“Can I…can I kiss you?”

You weren’t sure where the question had come from, and yet you were, because some time along the way of getting to know him you had realized something. Everything you had thought there was to hate about Bakugou was really something to love. Over the course of this project, you had done something extraordinarily stupid. You had developed feelings for a boy who would never like you back. Which was why his next words stole your breath entirely.

“Please,” Bakugou said, his words a sticky sweet, fervent plea.

You blinked, daring to look at him again only to find him wide open to you. He was leaning forward, a look in his eyes you could scarcely describe, a feverish desire overcoming him. His hand on your face twitched ever so slightly in anticipation as you leaned forward.

When your lips met his, you were surprised by the easiness of it. You fell forward into him, arms draped around his broad shoulders as he pulled you in, large hand wrapping around your waist, firm and capable. He tasted like burnt sugar, impossibly so, and it made your head spin, made you dizzy with the sensation. It made you hungry for him.

When he licked your lower lip, you let him swallow you down, hands blazing a fiery trail across your waist to your back, making the trip over and over and burning into you with their warmth. You tugged on his hair lightly, eliciting a moan from him that shot straight through your chest. You gasped into his open mouth, your clumsy kiss flipping when he slipped his tongue into your mouth. Everything became easier when you let him take over, let him pull you into his lap up against the hardness of his body and tilt your head to the side just so, pliable and soft in his arms. Kissing him became easy and natural, shivers running through your body as you surrendered yourself to the experience.

When he finally pulled away, you found yourself licking a mixture of your spit and his off your mouth, not even minding how profoundly gross that was. Normally you would have shuddered, but you were far too busy staring at him, mesmerized and breathless.

“You, uh…that was…that was really nice. And I think you’re pretty.” Bakugou coughed. “Do you want to go out sometime? Because obviously you need somebody to distract you from your homework, stupid. Look what you did. Made a mess of yourself.”

You ducked your head into his shoulder at his words, hiding your face and your embarrassment. “Yeah, sure. That sounds nice.”

He hummed, the sound resonating in his chest and traveling straight to your ear. “Can I…kiss you again then?”

“I thought you would never ask.”

[mc-lukanette]

42 More Lukanette Thoughts

Marinette making a lucky charm bracelet for Luka, but being afraid to give it to him since Adrien also has one and she doesn’t want Luka thinking that he’s just a replacement for Adrien. Luka finds the gift eventually and naturally does not think that at all.

Luka being a morning person (or at least more of one than Marinette) so he helps Marinette’s sleep schedule by calling her to wake her up in the morning. This also leads to late-night calls between them where they both check if the other is sleeping at the right time (which can lead to either good or bad things; good because they’re checking on each other, bad because they clearly don’t have self-control and might just keep each other up).

Luka ends up hurting one of his hands and proceeds to avoid Marinette, knowing that his lack of ability to play music might affect him emotionally. He doesn’t want her to see him vulnerable. Marinette inevitably figures it out and frets over him while also thinking up ways to help him out.

Marinette being miserable every time she hears the ballroom music that she used to associate with her (former) love for Adrien. She was with Luka once and he got to witness her shouting angrily at the speakers playing the music that she has a boyfriend who is NOT Adrien and she doesn’t appreciate this reminder of Adrien’s existence.

Marinette struggling to confess to Luka, but then having no problem rambling off praises for him to other people.

Marinette tries on Luka’s highlights once and surprises Luka with it. He’s so caught off-guard that he reaches up and touches/feels her hair himself, earning a blush out of Marinette. Now she has to try his looks more so he’ll initiate physical contact more.

Luka getting his own version of “Copycat” (not him being jealous, but just an akuma who’s out to make him look bad). The name? Lukalike.

AU where Marinette isn’t technically into Adrien, but has been brought up/grew up to plan and schedule for the future to an obsessive degree (in line with all her scheduling in canon). She actually wasn’t romantically in love with Adrien but saw him as a viable option and he was “already in her plans” by the time Luka showed up. Marinette cut Luka off in a panic after realizing she was in love with him, but realizes her mistake later on and absolutely drops an emotional bomb on him when she reveals that she returned his feelings this whole time and had to get over her obsession for planning/organization first..

Luka still being the calm, collected individual he is, but he’s actually really excitable and “loud” over text. Marinette learns that after they exchange numbers and it’s adorable.

Vagabond (Homeless) Luka who travels all around, playing music for people. Marinette loves his music and will happily walk around to find him playing, even if she’s crunched for time. He provides lots of inspiration for her though it sure is weird how long he’s been around??? what could he possibly be sticking around for? (bonus if he sticks around so long that it leads into winter and obviously she’s not letting him stay outside)

Luka and Marinette meeting as Viperion and Ladybug, falling for each other, and they want to date but they also don’t want people to know so cue superhero dating.

AU where Juleka either wasn’t born or she and Luka simply didn’t grow up together, so Luka didn’t have to grow into the “big brother” type. He’s also bad with physical contact, as his mother isn’t a very physically-affectionate person, so he seeks out a way to be better with being touched. In comes Marinette and she happily offers to get him used to physical contact. Bonus if she starts feeling jealous at the idea of him eventually being able to touch other people and Double Bonus if she just ends up being the exception more than anything else and they’re both okay with that.

Pre-dating, Luka and Marinette knowing full well what they do to each other and going out of their way to make the other blush.

“Felix” divergence where it turns out that Marinette was still pursuing Adrien because she was convinced that Luka wasn’t actually crushing on her (thought it was her overthinking/hoping for too much because she “is used to being disappointed” by now, plus the fact that he confessed and then walked away without saying a word), but she realizes that he is when he makes the comment about “being there for her.” She explains it to him in relief and Luka’s heart is sent on a ride because he was convinced that she didn’t feel that way about him. Bonus if now Marinette is panicking about the video and will later be glad that it didn’t go through.

Sass “challenging” Marinette and teasingly saying that he’ll take Luka if she doesn’t want him. Cue Marinette being very jealous of Sass hanging around Luka all the time and she eventually gets fed up to the point of confessing to Luka outright, then being all smug to Sass who had planned this from the beginning so he’s not complaining.

Rose gets a cold, so Luka temporarily takes over as Kitty Section’s singer for practice. Marinette isn’t ready.

Childhood Friends AU where Marinette grows up believing that Luka and Juleka must have the same romantic orientation because they’re twins and she doesn’t know how orientations works. Thus, clearly Luka is gay which means that he doesn’t return her feelings obviously (she’s very wrong).

Marinette wanting a song to replace the ballroom music she remembers when she was still crushing on Adrien, so she non-subtly tries to find a song that Luka would like that they could slow dance to (either pre or post dating).

Post-battle, Viperion asking Ladybug if it’s okay for him to hang onto the snake miraculous for a little longer, then going on to explain that Marinette, a friend of his, seemed really sad that day and he figured it’d help to be visited by a hero. (Ladybug is screaming internally because she knows that she’s not supposed to let them keep them any longer than the battle but his request is so pure and sweet and he’s doing it for her--)

Viperion setting up for Second Chance. During the battle, he and Ladybug end up bonding and/or kissing, but Viperion ends up needing to go back, thus erasing it from the timeline. However, while Ladybug doesn’t seem to remember the specifics or what happened, she seems to have vague feelings that he used Second Chance and even touches her lips at one point with a thoughtful look.

Marinette learning how to do her own make-up to try and look closer to the age that Luka looks. She very much doesn’t need it to impress him/make him think that she’s pretty..

Marinette getting into bouts of being extremely lame and romantic, like texting Luka things like, “I was just thinking about you,” and then regretting it when he responds with something equally lame with no hesitation.

Fu being okay with Luka knowing Ladybug’s identity, as Luka is someone who keeps to himself, is able to keep a secret, and actively supports Marinette.

One day, Marinette accidentally catches Luka working on a love song that’s clearly written for her. He’s embarrassed for once, partly because he’d never intended for her to hear it, but she assures him that it’s okay and she’d like to hear the full thing. She shows up occasionally to listen to his progress, Luka suspecting nothing, then cut to when the full song is done and she ends up singing it alongside him without warning, essentially confessing back to him.

Event where Marinette is put in charge of selling custom-made “Ladybug Fan” and “Chat Noir Fan” T-shirts. And then in comes Luka with a white shirt and a shoddily-but-lovingly-written “Marinette Fan” on it (bonus if he tried to draw her pink flowers).

Marinette drawing something for Adrien in her sketchbook and keeps abandoning it to spend time with/visit Luka (a metaphor for her slowly getting over Adrien and falling for Luka instead). She’ll end up making something for Luka instead in the end.

At some point in adulthood, Marinette admitting to Luka that she’s been crushing on him for a long time, but was afraid of saying anything. Luka assures her that there’s still a place in his heart, but Marinette needs time to accept that (out of guilt and being convinced for so long that he’d never forgive her) and/or Luka needs time to really confirm to himself that she means it (not that he doesn’t believe her but he’s thought for so long that she didn’t like him that way). Cue awkward dorks slowly working their way into a relationship with hand touches, cheek kisses, and finally the full acceptance that they’re willing to forget about what they thought before and just love each other.

Luka and Marinette being married with kids. Whenever Marinette has to let Luka sleep, he’ll wake up later but with their kids telling him that she told them to tell him that she loves him (she also might’ve skipped breakfast because she doesn’t like having it without him and Luka will definitely be going to meet with her for lunch, complete with kisses for giving him so many feels in the morning).

someone: Marinette, don’t hide your face in your hands. [Marinette proceeds to use Luka’s hands to hide her face instead]

Marinette and Luka, having never met, being in a pet store and buying a pet mouse and snake respectively. Unexpectedly, the two pets escape from them at some point before they leave the store, and after frantically searching, they find the mouse and snake next to each other and actually seeming to get along as if they’re friends. The store owner confirms that the two animals frequently escape to see each other and they have no idea why, but Luka and Marinette acknowledge it and decide to exchange addresses so their pets can still see each other. Meeting up “just for the sake of their pets” quickly becomes an excuse.

Luka is definitely the type who wouldn’t wash off Marinette’s lipstick kisses for the longest time. Marinette ends up having to clean them off herself (which really just encourages him not to do it himself more).

Likewise, Marinette forgot her gloves once while it was cold and Luka warmed her hands for her, so she continued “forgetting them” after that.

Luka and Marinette end up getting a pet and Marinette struggling between finding Luka playing with their pet adorable and being extremely jealous because now the pet is stealing her Luka time.

Post-dating, Marinette having self-esteem issues over being as short as she is (maybe having gotten rude comments from models before). She keeps trying to kiss Luka from above and insisting on being the big spoon.

Kitty Section getting a singing game and Luka getting to hear Marinette singing for the first time. Now he has to hear it so much more. Bonus if their voices blend well together when they sing together.

Marinette wanting to give Luka promise ring but being convinced that he’d hate it because he “already has so many accessories” (as if Luka wouldn’t enthusiastically wear anything she gives him).

Luka being an exhausted rock star who flees from paparazzi and his fans. Marinette ends up seeing him and letting him hide in her house, being a huge fan of him but not getting to star-struck levels since she grew up with a famous model friend and knowing celebrities. She allows Luka to hide at her place whenever he wants and eventually worries about him seeing her as “just like his fans” when she realizes that she’s crushing on him.

Marinette breaking up with Adrien in adulthood, which starts a lot of rumors from people about how Marinette will just turn down any guy she sees because who in the right mind would break up with the sunshine model??? Then, cue Luka (who may or may not have met Marinette yet) coming in and seeing all the distance people make from Marinette (and not getting it), so he happily approaches her and strikes up a conversation because he doesn’t care about rumors or anything like that.

Marinette getting a two-seater bike for Luka and trying to be subtle about it like

Alya doing a scheme by inventing some sort of game where someone gets chosen and has to shout out the person they love because, “Girl, you blurt things out all the time! You’ll totally say Adrien’s name,” and then Marinette blurts out Luka’s name because she loves him and not Adrien, shocking everyone.

If Marinette and Luka (i.e: the “thinkers” of the hero group) were akumatized together, Paris - no, the world - would be officially screwed.

Fashion Designer Marinette and Rock Star Luka. Marinette has been trying to confess to Luka for a while, but things usually go wrong or the timing is always off. She finally says “screw it” to subtlety, and waits for them to have an interview together (as Luka wears Marinette’s clothes constantly and they’re best friends), then unzips her jacket to “get comfortable” while they’re sitting next to each other, revealing an, “I Love Luka Couffaine (yes, romantically),” shirt. The interviewer and audience notice immediately (especially due to the large screen in the background that shows an enlarged view of the interviewer, Luka, and Marinette) and then it’s just a matter of waiting for Luka to notice (probably after he stops gushing about Marinette’s amazing clothing choices).

[yukipri]

One Piece Mermaid AU!

Featuring Luffy as a rubber mermaid who can’t swim, and Ace who carries her on his back as they pirate together.

＊Genderbend warning, fem!Luffy

Sliding in last minute for MerMay, bc idk about you, but I need something to mark that May has passed this year...

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PLEASE DO NOT REPOST, EDIT, TRANSLATE, OR OTHERWISE USE MY ART. To share, please reblog! Reblogs and comments greatly appreciated!!!

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Base headcanons for this AU beneath the cut! ↓ ↓ ↓

Luffy's a mermaid who was raised in Fuusha village, just like in canon. And, just like in canon, despite being a mermaid, she SUCKS at swimming, a fact that Shanks finds absolutely hilarious. She still wants to become a pirate, she still eats her devil fruit and becomes a rubber mer(?), she still gets kidnapped by Higuma (who sees her as an excellent way to rake in cash, given how valuable mermaids are on the slave market), and Shanks still gives her his hat.

As a devil fruit user, Luffy's already atrocious swimming skills are now at zero. She can still breathe under water, but will sink like a stone, her strength sapped by the sea, and if she loses consciousness she'll stop breathing too. Needless to say, she stays out of the water, and the villagers come to accept that sometimes, mermaids just live on land.

Garp still comes back, and is still furious at her wanting to become a pirate (and inwardly, extremely concerned that a bandit tried to catch and sell her), and still takes her to live at Dadan's where she meets Ace.

Ace has no idea what to think of the weird fish-brat who he's now told is gonna be his sibling, and resolutely ignores Luffy. He's inwardly slightly impressed as Luffy continues to follow him through the mountain every day, not even particularly hindered by lack of legs and using a mixture of crawling, squirming, hand-walking, and ricocheting forward with rubber arms to move.

Luffy still meets Sabo the same way as canon, and is still caught by Porchemy, who at first is thrilled because a mer brat! That'll bring in WAY more money than the spare change Ace stole! But in the end, he loses his temper at Luffy's stubbornness and still beats her to a pulp.

Ace and Sabo still rescue Luffy, and they still exchange sake cups and become brothers.

Yes, brothers.

Because at this point, neither Ace nor Sabo nor any of the bandits, nor anyone really on Dawn island save Makino and Garp actually know that Luffy's a girl. Not even Luffy.

The three brothers promise to each other that they'll all leave the island when they turn seventeen, setting out to sea to become pirates (Ace and Sabo are honestly a little concerned, given how often people try to sell Luffy, and how despite aquatic appearances Luffy's vulnerable af in water, but decide to wait and see. They have seven years together, Luffy ten until seventeen, who knows how much stronger their baby brother will get in that time).

Sabo "dies."

Ace and Luffy continue to train, and things don't change until Ace is seventeen, shortly before he sets out to sea.

He's let Luffy crawl into his blanket to sleep with him (partially cold-blooded, Lu gets cold easily when inactive), and Ace realizes that his lil brother's chest feels a bit lumpy.

Concerned, he makes Luffy have it checked out by the bandits, who are shocked to find developing...breasts?

That can't be right...right?

Dadan makes a call to Garp, who snorts and says of COURSE Luffy's a girl, didn't he say granddaughter?

No, he had not, he had only mentioned "grand child."

Everyone is shocked, but none more so than Ace, who really doesn't know what to do with this new information.

(Luffy's not quite sure what a "girl" is, and when she asks Ace, Ace honestly doesn't know how to define "girl" either, so she doesn't get what the big deal is)

Ace realizes he's troubled because he can't remember the number of times he's rescued Luffy from potential traffickers, and the number of times he's heard the lament, "Pity it's not female, it'd be worth quadruple," from the kidnappers before he beats them to a pulp.

He already had doubts about letting Luffy go out to sea alone, three years after he's left. But now knowing that Luffy's a girl, and one of the most sought-after species that traffickers target...he knows the world out there is much bigger than a teeny peaceful East Blue island, and Luffy may not get lucky every time, and may not be strong enough in just three years.

But at the same time, it's not like he can order her to stay here. There's no way Luffy'd listen; the sea calls to her, freedom calls to her, and Ace understands that more than anyone.

Sabo, Ace thinks, what would you do?

The night before he leaves, Ace tells Luffy that there's been a change of plans.

He's still leaving for sea. He's going to get stronger, and work his way towards becoming Pirate King.

BUT, three years later, Luffy will NOT leave Dawn Island alone.

Ace promises that he'll come back, a stronger pirate capable of looking out for his baby brother (because girl or not, they exchanged vows of brotherhood, and that's something that can't be changed).

He refuses to let Luffy be his captain, he's still got his pride, but maybe, maybe if Luffy becomes strong enough, he'll let her be co-Captain.

Luffy is thrilled, because she wanted to be pirates WITH Ace, and grudgingly accepts the compromise, and promises to train and wait for Ace's return.

Ace leaves Dawn island, and makes a name for himself on the Grand Line (he's PISSED when he finds out he's eaten a devil fruit, because now how's he supposed to rescue Lu from drowning when he can't swim himself???).

He even eventually makes it to Whitebeard, and eventually comes to admire the man. Whitebeard invites him to his crew, and Ace honestly replies that a large part of him wants to accept...but he can't. He promised his baby brother that they'll be pirates and co-captains together, and he can't join another pirate crew without Luffy agreeing too. Even so, and he knows it's selfish of him, he wants to call Whitebeard his father.

Whitebeard tells him that Ace is already his son, regardless of where his allegiances lie, and gives him his blessing to return to East Blue to fetch Luffy. Whitebeard laughs that he can't wait to meet the lil brat that Ace speaks so highly of, and for Ace to hurry up and come back to the New World so they can meet.

Ace plans on traveling light, his former crew all choosing to join the Whitebeard pirates except for his first mate, Deuce. Ace loves his crew, but they're also his crew, and knows that he wants to make their crew with Luffy. So he thinks he and Deuce will be a good starting point (You're just bringing me along bc you want someone who can swim on the crew, Deuce accuses).

As they're planning on leaving, Marco lets slip to fellow commander Thatch that he heard that Ace's "little brother" is actually a super cute girl.

The next morning, Thatch shows up too, insisting that he come along, because hey! He's been with the Whitebeards for ages and hasn't been to Paradise in a while, he wants some change! And won't it be nice to have someone as reliable as him along, just until they get back to the New World and reunite with the Whitebeards? Really he has no ulterior motives like wanting to check out Ace's supposedly hyper hot baby brother-sister!

Ace is suspicious, but Thatch is already on board and the other Whitebeards are already waving so he lets it go.

(Shortly after they leave, Thatch discovers a devil fruit. Deuce tells him to sell the damn thing, it'll taste like shit, but Thatch thinks boy wouldn't it be great to be able to woo Ace's hot brother with a really cool devil fruit power. So he eats it, and yeah it tastes like shit, but now he can control Darkness which is sorta badass?)

(Somewhere on the Whitebeard ships, Blackbeard is still waiting for someone to find the darkness devil fruit, and well, it doesn't happen)

Before Ace returns to Dawn Island, part of him still hopes that Luffy looks passably like a guy. Having been to Fishman island, having befriended Jinbe, he knows that while mermen can still be targeted, mermaids are exponentially more vulnerable. He's learned the kinds of clothing that can help conceal tails, and is hoping that there's a slim chance they might be able to be pirates without the world knowing that Lu's a mermaid.

His hopes are shot when Luffy rockets into his arms at the dock, and his face is immediately buried in enormous tits that definitely weren't there three years ago.

Despite Ace's growing concerns (and red face; why does he feel so hot??? It's not his devil fruit...), Ace lets Luffy give Deuce a beating (why me?!) to claim her position as Ace's Co-Captain of the newly established ASL pirates (because if we're pirates together, Sabo has to be with us too!).

Luffy's gotten a lot stronger, but is still utterly ignorant of the outside world and the dangers it holds (such as the drooling Thatch who immediately wins Luffy over with his cooking despite Ace's burning glares). She's reckless and falls into the ocean every damn day, and while Deuce dives in after her and they've discovered her useful ability to talk to fish to ask for help, it still gives Ace heart attacks.

They still pick up more crew members while in East Blue, including Roronoa Zoro, Usopp, and Sanji, a pervy cook who competes daily with Thatch for Luffy's affections through food (Luffy appreciates the food).

At Arlong Park, Luffy encounters fishmen for the first time in her life. Arlong mocks Luffy's choice of friends and family, and invites her to join his crew made of her own kind. Fishmen and mer are the superior race, and Luffy will make a fine wife, Arlong says.

Luffy breaks his nose off, and Nami joins their crew.

Luffy's chosen mode of transportation is on the back of one of her sturdier crew mates, usually Ace, but often Zoro too. She unfortunately hates all the long skirts/robes Ace suggested for her to hide her tail, and so Ace has decided that being as intimidating as possible while carrying his brother glued to his back is the only way to go.

Needless to say, news of the former Spade Pirates Captain + Whitebeard Commander Thatch (are they an extension of the Whitebeards??) establishing the new ASL pirates spreads fast. That, and rumors that there's a beautiful young mermaid on board who can't swim. And despite the strength of the crew and their attempts at vigilance, Luffy's still dumb and gullible, and is kidnapped (and rescued) a dozen times before they're even on the Grand Line.

(after a few times, Luffy's uncharacteristically quiet, and privately asks Ace if they can break up the crew. She's holding Ace back; she not only made him come back to her, but half their adventures just seem to be her crew rescuing her. She's strong enough to defeat enemies, but not save herself. Ace tells her to shut up, and never bring this up again; they're BROTHERS, and he's not going to leave her behind or make her abandon her dreams when she can't accomplish them alone, and that's his choice. Luffy doesn't bring it up again, but works harder than ever to become stronger and earn recognition as co-Captain when the world seems intent on thinking of her as Ace's pet.)

During one of these kidnappings, Luffy's successfully brought all the way to an auction house before her crew can rescue her. An auction house that unbeknownst to them, was under investigation by the Revolutionary Army.

Liberating slaves is an unfortunately common mission for them, and Sabo's doing final sweeps as Koala frees the last of them when he notices a tank stowed away in a corner. He's familiar with these tanks, used to showcase mermaids in the rare occasions one can be caught, and it looks empty but he's still drawn to it for some reason.

It's only when he gets closer that he notices a mermaid crumpled at the bottom of the enclosure. She's completely slumped over, and he's afraid she's already gone, even as something about her screams with familiarity.

He's cracked the tank and has reached in to pull her out, when the wall behind him explodes in flames, revealing a furious Ace who snarls at the strange man with his hands on his baby brother...

...and then Sabo's memories come back.

~~

Something like that???? For an initial HCs dump????

This AU has continued! A LOT! Check out the comics, illustrations, and text stories for this AU under the Mermaid AU section of my One Piece Masterpost!

As always, REBLOGS, tags, asks, and comments greatly appreciated!

Advance posts for this AU and more are on my Patreon! (Patreon(.)com/YukiPri)

[bookwyrminspiration]

TW// Drugs n such

you asked for it smh, but I've been thinking a lot about that one scene in Neverseen in Exilliums healing tent (or whatever its called)

I had a whole rant here about what the implication of this 'serum' might mean in the lost cities but it kinda spiraled into nothing so I'm cutting it out. (main point was just the mood towards drugs, Shannon has had previous mentions of both alcohol and drunk people, so (though im not saying she should incorporate this into a middle grade book series a t a l l), Id be curious to see her take on drugs, (if they exist and how they effect people and the elven population // how is it treated? Is it looked down upon or even forbidden (why we might only see it in Exillium territories) or is it so normal and inconsequential that its just part of the norm in the lost cities?

but anyway, back to the thing I was originally thinking of - i feel like this is something rarely talked about but pls tell me I'm not the only one who has picked up on how weird Keefe's relationship with sedatives is. It's such a contrast to Sophie, where she's openly opposed to taking any type of sedative he seems to be really open to them, in fact in Unlocked every time he's knocked out by a sedative his language is pretty much always positive, like he really enjoys it. This probably just ties into something you mentioned a while back about Keefe and dealing with stuff by running away but I find it really interesting.

(Sorry if this is an uncomfortable ask to get, I know not everyone is comfortable with drug talk and I hope this Isn't overstepping a line.)

you're fine, don't worry! no lines overstepped. I appreciate you including the warning at the top, even though I'm alright talking with the subject. if there's something I'm uncomfortable with, that's not on you to know or worry about because I haven't shared any of my specific triggers, and the more anxiety-inducing ones are so specific to my personal experiences that I highly doubt they'll ever have any effect on any conversation ever. but I do genuinely appreciate your concern <33

I don't remember specifically what I asked for, but this is a topic I hadn't even realized was so fascinating, so thank you for bringing it up! That scene is kinda funny (as in weird) looking back on it, but Keefe was completely out of it and being a lot more vulnerable than he probably wanted to be due to his state of mind. I think it was intended to mirror something like anesthesia or laughing gas (note: in my brief research trying to find info about the boobrie dude I made a mental comparison between tam and sandor, so I'm just making note of it here so I don't forget), at least as far as Keefe's reaction goes. I think part of this was strategic so that we could get some information and vulnerability (although unwillingly) from Keefe and get that first glimpse of "the boy beneath all that swagger" (paraphrased from Sophie). But that's not what your ask is about so I'll move on before I get even more distracted.

wine, at the very least, exists in the lost cities. we've got fizzleberry wine, which is blamed by some for Caprise Redek's accident. Aside from that we've seen no mention of it, as this is a middle grade series about a young teen girl in a fantasy world, and in a "perfect" world there isn't a lot of talk about recreational substances. And I agree with you! this isn't to say that I think drugs and alcohol should be this huge thing in keeper or that it even needs to be address, just commenting that the attitude the general public has towards substances and intoxication is likely even more severe in the elven world, as has been the pattern with other things. We can tell from Caprise's incident that their wine functions similar if not identical to ours, as it was said to have impaired her motor control and thinking, hence how she fell off that balcony. So I think we could assume that drugs in the Lost Cities would be similar to those in the Forbidden Cities in function. Not in name though, likely named after some strange elven thing. Though if we go with the wine example, Fizzleberry is likely an exact description of what it is--the wine probably fizzes and is made from berries.

the elves highly value the mind, so I anticipate that anything that messes with it past beneficial medicinal uses prescribed by a physician are frowned upon. they think of your mental capacity and capabilities as integral to who you are, and composure as essential. drugs take that away and can impair your reasoning, hence my conclusion they're not well liked. however, I propose that this mindset is mostly those who are very proper, for example Lord Cassius. Dex was more than ready to take concentration serums of his own making--and convinced Sophie to take one (note: dex has almost killed both Sophie and Fitz. that can't be fun to know)--which directly messed with his limbic center. However, as he was raised in an apothecary and is already a little less in line with all other elvin values, I don't think him being an outlier is enough to completely through out my assumption. overall: looked down upon because it messes with the mind and the mind is crucial to elven society, and the way it impairs your thinking would make you a lesser person

and you're right! keefe's relationship with sedative is weird. we have this teenager who grew up without stable supports or a loving family having very little regard for how substances will effect his body, prioritizing the possible--not guaranteed, possible--benefits over all the risks. this is not to say drug use is inherently bad, just that the situation he's in makes me very cautious because he feels more at risk of falling into bad habits. also, your observation about tying that into him running away is very astute! i've talked a lot about him running away from his problems in more ways that physical, and I think this is an excellent example of that

he doesn't like his reality, the world he lives in when he's awake and aware and lucid. it's full of all these problems and people and he doesn't know what to do. but when he's asleep? he doesn't have to deal with any of that. he doesn't have to do anything, but he's also troubled enough and anxious enough that sleep doesn't always come easy, and he can be plagued by nightmares. but those sedatives mess with his mind and not only make him sleep faster and longer, but they can mess with your dreams and alter the reality you experience while asleep. i guess it could be a way of trying to take control of a situation he had very little control over, especially in unlocked when everyone else was trying to fix things without consulting him. with his waking world that bad, of course he's gonna like anything that takes him away from it.

it stands out especially when we switch to him as a narrator and he's praising these things and wanting to be sedated, as we've spent so long in Sophie's head and she's so against them from the trauma she experienced in the first book. that could mean his attitude them is more jarring just because we're used to Sophie and it wouldn't seem as dramatic if we'd switched from say, Fitz's head. but that doesn't mean there's nothing here.

i think i've said it before, but Keefe doesn't have any healthy coping strategies right now that he consistently relies on. his deference towards avoidance and making the problem go away, even if it's just in feeling induced by drugs, is a more extreme example of how he doesn't know how to just exist without hurting.

I jumped around a bit between topics so if I missed something you wanted to talk about more in depth please feel free to send another ask! Keefe's relationship to experiencing reality is fascinating and covers things from denial and refusal to change all the way to drugs and literally altering the way his brain perceives reality. This boy is on a collision course with destruction in both body and mind.

[life-rewritten]

Lovely Writer (5-7)- The Fantasy of Love: The Search for Family, Freedom and Love

Wow it’s like I haven’t written in so long on here. You know this because I literally have to analyse and break down Lovely writer episode 5-7 and catch up before tomorrows episode, these episodes just by themselves are packed and full of depth and meta and it takes ages to comb through the information and present the results. But I’m back and I have so much to say, I feel so incredibly worried and scared for our babies as they deal with the villains of the show, but I also can’t help but swoon at the themes of the show, and why they’re important for representation in BL to be shown and discussed. Lovely Writer continues to be fluffy, cute BL on the surface but deep within a powerful medium for conversations about LGTBTQ representation and more. Isn’t it brilliant? And with two incredible Bl couples there’s so much to break down and analyse. So let’s break down the fantasy of BL love and why it’s a massive theme in the show.

Gene and His Fear

Gene’s reactions to people are in a way very similar to someone who is going through a stereotypical situation, and at first I didn’t understand why he had such a certain mistrust in people like for example although it was understood his fears and worries about Nubsib, he reacted in a way that seemed very extra and over the top in episode 6. The reason why this feels extra is because he made the audience feel like Nubsib must have been a horrible person to him in the past for him to go into a panic attack and break down over the fact that he lied about his identity and it is Sib. Obviously the reason why he was panicking is because he had realised he had fallen in love with Nubsib and he thought he was a victim of a practical joke wherein he fell hard but Nubsib’s feelings were insincere. It seemed like he felt scared like the one person he trusted and felt truly himself and comfortable with (who Nubsib always seems to be for him even in childhood) was fake and not possible path for him. This points back to the doubts and ideas Gene holds about himself, he doesn’t have social anxiety but he does have a form of discomfort that makes him feel he doesn’t belong with others, like he’s different, he’s ‘abnormal’ this points to his internalised struggle with his sexuality and being with his friends who want him to be truthful, it points out to his struggle with being imaginative preferring toys and childish games over the games his peers preferred at a young age, him being a BL author when normally it’s not written by men etc. He tends to want to hide and shield himself from others by entering his own imagination hence why he finds writing a safe space. The one person he found comfort in sharing all his fears with or embracing who he was is Nubsib, this is why his walls broke in shock realising that all Nubsib did was a lie. And really not going to lie Gene’s comments to Mhork about people assuming that because he’s a writer he’s an introvert did throw me, because I do see him as that, he has a lot of trust issues that’s what it seemed like to me, someone who doesn’t trust people, or like confronting or dealing with situations because he feels alienated or different from others, someone who doesn’t like being vulnerable with people because he’s afraid of it being used against him. That’s fine because when he’s angry at Nubsib those reasons make sense to me why he broke down in that way, it pulled on all of his hidden insecurities, all of his fears about never finding someone else that gets him, all of his worries that he was always being mocked or looked down upon that other people could tell he was different, that he was weird, that he didn’t feel comfortable with them.

 Because he’s meant to be like this when Nubsib’s truth gets unveiled, he’s going to be terrified, go through the panic attacks, go through the break downs and flooding of emotions that were hidden deep, this is why his reactions are extremely dramatic and intense.  That’s what I thought. But what Gene tells Mhok is that he only pulls away from people when he writes to focus, and that’s fine but it didn’t add up with how he acts with others when it comes to social situations, sure he’s polite, and sometimes agrees to go out and do something with others, but we can see he tends to feel stressed, uncomfortable and annoyed with how people behave, especially when it’s not what he feels like doing (this happens both as a child and also as an adult). The second confusing thing I had to process was that Gene is wealthy. I did mention in previous episodes that Nubsib and Gene have mirror characters with Hin mirroring Gene, and Aey mirroring Nubsib’s situation, however one of the differences between them and their mirrors is the idea of privilege and ease of life. Gene isn’t as desperate as Hin to be a writer because he doesn’t have to prove anything, he’s fully accepted at home, he’s immensely wealthy, has a writer mum to seek advise from, and most of his family support his dreams (will break down the father later), Hin has none of that, in fact he’s even more desperate to make it to writing by doing BL because he is suffering from lack of wealth and prominence in the industry. Nubsib is given semi permission to do whatever he wants, to change his name to do acting but he always has a place back home, he also as well has prominence and isn’t desperate either to have his acting dreams come through, because he can be protected and taken care of since he’s the heir of his father’s company. Aey has none of that, Aey’s family is toxic, forceful and abusive and he doesn’t have any choice but to cling to acting for freedom. You  seeing the similarities and use of mirroring in the show?

It’s really important because it again makes us understand why Gene and Nubsib are going to be probably victims of Hin and Aey who feel like they have no choice but to commit to their desperation and get rid of whatever will stop them. Gene and Nubsib don’t need to do that (though they have other problems) and instead actually take what they do a bit for granted, for example even if the BL industry is corrupted and Gene isn’t happy to write for it, he’s still making money, is being observed and talked about whilst Hin isn’t getting that and he wants to write BL authentically. It’s the same as Nubsib, although the industry makes him angry, he also takes for granted what he has, he’s not careful even when warned about how his actions with Gene could lead to the production of the show failing, he’s just set on Gene, again I agree with them but when you look at the fact that Aey has no choice but to be this way, to have the ship with Nubsib if he wants to survive and make it, Nubsib’s actions start to seem privileged, and selfish. This is why Lovely writer is a great show, none of the characters are all good, and none of them are all bad, it’s all about humans who have flaws and act like real life people with issues they need to grow from and learn from whilst dealing with the fear and pressure of the BL industry as a whole.

Again the villain of the show isn’t the characters it’s the industry its self, the system, the rules and the way things are done. That’s what the ultimate villains are here and also the traditional rules of society that entraps the characters (will get into this later).  Again the being rich and successful since his childhood might also explain why Gene doesn’t let people easily into his life, Gene may not trust people either because of his status, his family’s name, his reputation. Again it brings up the idea that he could be used when he’s vulnerable for something else and tricked and played with if people know his truths and insecurities and use them as weapons. You could also argue that Gene wants to run away from the rich things in life even though he is comfortable with how he lives (Plus he probably made enough money from Bad engineer to move out), it may also allude to Gene not wanting to be known for his father’s wealth and status, and the reason why he clings to writing so desperately is because he wants his own success, his own freedom, his own earnings from what he loves to do. One of the themes with all 4 characters especially Aey, Gene and Sib is Freedom, as much as ambition is important to them it’s because it’s the only way to get them to escape the life that they have been forced to grow up in  because of their parents, rules, obligations and demands. By finding their own paths, and clinging to it desperately they all find a space to breath, to be their true selves and have no chains holding them to other traditions, rules or jobs that they don’t want to be in.  

Fathers and their Traditions

Gene’s father seems like also a source of his insecurity in himself, he looks like he fills Gene’s head with worries and doubts and fear that he’s not doing what he’s meant to do. When the father suggests to Gene that he should return back home, I know that look on Gene’s face very well, it’s anxiety, worry and fake smile to find an excuse why that isn’t possible. Gene’s mind knows his father doesn’t approve even though he smiles and fakes his way of looking like he doesn’t mind who Gene is, what Gene does. But it’s starting to be clear the father is homophobic, in fact it’s so clear that he sends Gene of to boarding school when he’s 14 just because he thinks and fears that Gene may be queer, he also tries to bring Gene back home because it’s easier for him to stop Gene writing Bl then. In fact this is another theme of the episodes since we were introduced to Aey’s story, the mirroring of the fathers in the show. The fathers are starting to have a pattern, and it all points to tradition, obligations and conforming to societal norms.  All Nubsib, Gene and Aey have all ran away from home because of this pattern. They’ve all pulled away from their families to focus on their dreams, this also includes Hin though it’s unsure if his parents are as bad as the others or if they are supportive and understanding. Aey’s father is the most traditional and outspoken, hence he’s abusive, vile and obtuse with how he speaks to Aey. He chains his son down and punishes him because he tried to flee and find happiness and love (with a boy heaven forbid!) and when Aey’s lover wasn’t who he said he was, wasn’t faithful and and was a coward he uses that opportunity to constantly put shame and emotional abuse on Aey making him carry the burden and weight of the father’s manipulations, and making him feel alienated and alone with no one to trust. It’s disgusting and it was horrifying.  Now Gene’s father is different, also manipulative on the surface but doesn’t show it outright to his son who though has been imbedded with the same insecurities and self-deprecation when he thinks he’s not fulfilling what is seen as right/ traditionally normal.

This is probably why Gene does have these  secret avoidances of who he was for a while, because he already had a vibe from his father since the childhood days, he probably understood later that his dad intentions made him feel alienated from what he wanted to do, and what he felt comfortable with. This is why when his father keeps silent whilst others are praising his show, and book he notices but keeps silent, because he knows he will soon go back to writing in his own home comfortable and himself with Nubsib. Nubsib’s father is not yet introduced but from what we have heard of him, he also falls into the line of responsibility and obligation because Sib is going against his fathers wishes by choosing to chase after Gene and become an actor, he’s breaking away from the tradition in his family preparation to take over his father’s company. Likewise we see that when Sib was a child he was also like Aey abused by being forced to give into pressure of doing what is seen as right and appropriate for a rich child. He was abused by his piano teacher and his mum turned an eye, refused to listen to him and punished him each time he tried to be free from that. Again although Sib’s father isn’t there, his absence shows what his role is too, he felt just as stifled by his father as his mother and he wanted to get away from it all. Gene was his escape from that, from all the duties, obligations, and neglect. They found each other and both ran away to play in an imaginary world together,  this kickstarted Gene’s love for creativity and writing, but also kickstarted Sib’s devotion to Gene who paid attention and showed him love and care. So the parents are tied to this theme of entrapment, and force and order,  with closed mindsets, ignorance and old fashioned ideas about what real ambition is, they become obstacles to their children’s pursuit for purpose, freedom and love. They are also the second villains of the show because they represent that idea of society and it’s traditional conformist norms being a barrier to people’s liberty of self. A theme always readily explored in the BL genre.

MhokAey: Fantasy of Love vs Resentment of Trust

We need to discuss about Aey and Mhok. A lot has happened to them since I wrote my previous analysis. Including the whole reveal that what they are is more than just friends but it threads a line between unrequited and toxic requited feelings. There’s a lot of confusing feelings about them, a lot of angst and drama and hate and mistrust to do with their story. Mhok is at the center of this. I remember analysing his character using Bad engineer mirroring outline that he was like the character he plays Tawan, he’s also like a second lead romantic interest for Aey, he comes second but he’s devoted to making sure Aey is safe and he’s devoted to trying ensure Aey doesn’t snap or leave his humanity and morality behind. Mhok and Aey like Gene and Nubsib (surprise surprise they also mirror them, with same themes and ideas) have known each other since they were children, Aey was cruel and heartless at that time due to the pressures of the environment he was in (from the father’s pressure and Aey being submissive to his father’s wishes) because of this Aey seems to have been angry, hurtful and callous all the time, including to Mhok who watched him and feared for his state. However Aey later finds freedom and happiness as he falls in love with Time, Time makes Aey finally want to give up all the pressure and obligations and be himself, except Time wasn’t who he said he was and when Aey’s father posed an obstacle after Aey’s jealous sister outed him (though I think she’s not the only person behind this I’ll explain), Time ran away with the money they saved up and left Aey damaged, broken hearted and destroyed.

Sadly what happened next is Aey also found Mhok to be part of this family’s bretrayal, and so he avoided Mhok and thought Mhok is using him to try and be seen as a good son/son in law to his wealthy family. The reason is why would Aey think Mhok is to blame? Unless in doing something stupid as always to protect Aey, in maybe knowing Time wasn’t who he said he was, and in anguish of his unrequited love for Aey, Mhok is the one who outed Aey to Earn which then led tothe catalyst? Why not? We don’t know his role during the time, Time was in Aey’s life, for someone who seems utterly devoted and possessive and at times jealous about Aey’s love interests (this includes him being jealous each time Aey and Sib interact or kiss), Mhok in order to protect Aey, his goal by the way, probably told Earn to find a way to stop it from happening but Earn hated Aey and used it as an opportunity to kick him out and make him lose his beloved son status because she was jealous. This is why Mhok cannot speak up when the father berates Aey about Time because he’s the one who probably started it.

We see that for Aey’s safety and ensuring he doesn’t go too far with his anger and callousness, Mhok goes behind his back constantly warning others about Aey’s motives (this irked me because the way he describes Aey as like this monstrous scary creature makes me wonder why he would think Aey could trust what he sees in him as love). Mhok tells Gene to be careful of Aey, he takes the blame and says he would take the fall if anything happens, it shows that even though he says Aey is awful, he’s happy when Aey shows some sort of vulnerability or selflessness but it also shows he does love Aey unconditionally. But how can Aey trust Mhok if he is connected to the Time situation, if he doubts Mhok’s goals and he understands what Mhok thinks of him and says of him to others. Of course he wouldn’t trust Mhok because everyone makes Aey feel like a monster, his father does this every day, everyone says they know he’s awful, cruel and callous, they know he can hurt people, they tell him this, and Aey holds on to this, he believes this is how people see him and in order to survive and get what he wants he has to manipulate others and be seen as kind and vulnerable on the surface to not suffer the same pain he goes through with his family and the people who judge him on his past . See how Mhok’s unrequited love borders on toxicity as well?

In order to make Mhok suffer because of his thirst for vengeance, and his bitterness and pain of feeling betrayed by him Aey kisses Mhok and pulls away pretending to be unaffected. Of course he is like this, he’s filled with anger, hate and distrust of everyone his goal is to hurt the ones who hurt him even if he senses that there is an attraction, there is vulnerability and authenticity with himself when he’s with Mhok. There’s a weakness which is why he succumbed for a while with the kiss and the hug, Aey was in pain and some part of him trusted Mhok’s embrace, but it switched back because of fear. For Aey Love is a fantasy for him, because love has caused him nothing but pain, the only way he can use love now is to manipulate and escape the clutches of his family and survive and be free. Love isn’t the goal anymore, so he uses the fantasy of BL love which fans cling to, to make people love him, to make people praise him, and in order to do so he focuses on Gene as an obstacle to him and Nubsib’s fake relationship. Without Nubsib the show won’t be a success, if the show isn’t a success he’ll be seen as a failure and his father would be proven right, and without success he’d be left alone, tired, abandoned and betrayed. See why he’s more desperate than Nubsib when it comes to acting? Gene mocks BL and says it’s a fantasy of love, and with Aey he’s right, Aey uses the industry’s idealism of the corrupt fantasy of BL love to get his gain. But can you blame him? And is Mhok really doing right in his aim to protect Aey from going past the edge?

The reason why we get Gene’s mum talk about authentic LGBTQ movies and then have Gene say that BL shouldn’t be part of that is exactly what Tee is trying to call out as the director of the show. But Tee is using Lovely Writer to be a place for representation conversations, we have had conversations about internalised homophobia, coming out, sexuality, authenticity of relationships,  we’ve had consent shown by the main couple so Tee is very serious about representation and trying to make this show a medium where things are serious and done correctly. Yes Mhok and Aey are very toxic for now because even though they representing authenticity of love, because there is something they both can’t control that is connecting them to each other, they’ve known each other for so long and can’t help but be tied together because of those feelings. Mhok is devoted to Aey even though he acts opposite at times, but because he doesn’t know how to show love accurately, he fails repeatedly with how he tries to show love, trying to fit in the situation with logic but also trying to hide behind the scenes so he can keep an eye on Aey, on the situation, so he can have control over it. Mhok has certain stereotypical ideas about Aey imbedded from their childhood together making him know Aey is manipulative, cold and mean but despite the fact that he thinks this way, he just thinks Aey can have a chance to turn around and truly be happy by forgiving others and himself. Mhok knows he loves Aey for who he is but at the same time, he dislikes that Aey is morally grey and he wants to stop Aey from making more mistakes to himself, to protect everyone around Aey that may be hurt in the crossfire of his bitterness. Because Aey has been burned by the pressure and betrayal of the family dynamics he has, he becomes also without meaning to a version of the person he hates; his father, he becomes manipulative, sneaky, and aggressive with how he does things. It also makes sense that as he was suffocating when he was younger that he turned colder and meaner because he needed somewhere to let out the hurt and pressure of being the perfect child and perhaps Mhok really was hurt by this with that action. His character makes sense to me because it’s not okay but it’s understandable. Mhok knows Aey in and out, in fact he knows Aey’s family is toxic and so does what he does to show love by being  chameleon like and putting himself directly into the family, hiding to try and find a way to protect Aey from the dynamic, this is why Aey misunderstands that he’s trying to replace him and please the father, get into their good graces to take his place but Mhok is doing it for Aey.

The themes about trying to find out what’s authentic and what’s not, manipulation and masks in order to hide and be near the one they love mirrors Nubsib and Gene’s romance path too, this is why I said their outlines mirror each other, whilst Aey like Gene feels hurt by the fakery and feels mocked by the mask of Mhok/plans of Sib, Gene and Nubsib have managed to communicate and reach an understanding about the truth about their relationship.

The Authenticity of Lovely Writer

So there’s a theme/question about the fantasy of love for these two couples because at a point both Gene and Aey doubt that the love of their partners is real, they believe it’s a trick, fake, joke.  That they’re both doing this for power, to have control over their weakness and vulnerability to use that against them. Gene is weary about people but finds himself automatically willing to trust and understand Nubsib because of what he represents to him safety, comfort and warmth, and freedom. Aey on the other hand has become jaded with love and finds Mhok instead as his place to hold resentment, anger and pain for the past. No matter how much he wants to try and move on, try and hope for a better dynamic (as we saw he tried in episode 4),  they constantly shatter that hope and by episode 4 he’s done, and also includes Mhok with that memory. So Aey and Mhok are in a toxic state because there is no chance for communication, no revealings of truths, and Aey is in a broken mindset, resentful of himself, resentful of everyone, and resentful of love.

In a way the fantasy of love is a  perfect theme for Lovely Writer, since Gene is meant to learn that BL is only corrupt because own voices aren’t there to help write serious stories or avoid problematic tropes. As Gene falls in love with Sib, he realises that just because things may seem fake or shallow doesn’t mean that they are, you need to be open, to think about it in a different point of view, you need to also learn to accept the truths and overcome your prejudice and stigma with those things. It’s important to note that although Nubsib starts of using inauthentic means, his love for Gene is real, which is ultimately what Gene accepts in episode 7. It’s real and he should stop running away from what he’s feeling just because of old fears and worries that it’s wrong for him to be his true self and love what he loves. I hope we get to see Aey go through his own journey to this too, as he’s about to fall even more and regress with his anger and desperation, I hope Mhok does more than just sitting behind the scenes if he really wants his goal to be to save Aey from his self and resentment. Mhok needs to be braver, to show up and make Aey see the truth about what he feels, just like Sib did with Gene. Because at the end of the day if the love is authentic and true, Aey won’t be able to avoid the truth, Aey won’t be able to hide or run anymore like Gene was doing, Aey would want to start slowly hopefully stop seeing Love as just a fantasy but something real. Obviously we’re more half way through and this means the big guns are going to be out. It’s time to tackle the villains, to see them shed their skin and show their true colours, It won’t be easy and we may have some regressions because of fear but our couples will overcome it and find them selves through it, at the end of the day hopefully they end up getting their freedom, love and happiness. As for now I continue to love this show, and I continue to praise it’s depth and meta. Let me know your opinions on the episodes so far. What do you think about MhokAey and SibGene,who’s more pitiful? Let me know.

[fluffomatic]

Danganronpa Tickle Headcanons

Makoto Naegi

Lee:

. Literally the most ticklish person in the group!

. Has the cutest, squeakiest laugh ever. If tickled for long enough eventually he'll start hiccupping.

.Veeeery squirmy! Tries to hold back tho because he's accidentally kicked his sister when she was tickling him whoops!

.This boy cannot hold his laughter in. Just saying you're going to tickle him will start him giggling, and after u start? Boy is he a giggling FOOL!

.Teasing causes his brain to shut down. Like he gets flustered easily when teased even if it's not about tickling. Someone calls him cute? Face is red af

.Worst spots are his belly, knees and the arch of his feet

Ler:

.This little guy LOVES tickling people as much as he loves getting tickled.

.He is quick and nimble and can luckily find peoples worst spots very fast

.Will tickle pretty much anyone at anytime but mainly targets Byakuya and Kyoko because of their attitudes.

.Despite not being able to take teases himself he can still dish em out! Tends to lean towards more cute softer teases like calling their laugh cute, commenting on how ticklish they are or just giggling along side them

.Though he is average in build and strength he is able to pin people down! Well most people at least. Or the lee just fears if they try to get unpinned they'd hurt Makoto and no one wants that

.Typically goes for a softer tickling approach

Byakuya Togami

Lee:

.You may not think the Ultimate Afluent Progeny is ticklish but you'd be DEAD wrong! This guy is crazy ticklish. Because of his childhood and lack of positive contact from his family he didn't even know he was ticklish for a long time. In fact he didn't know what if felt like. So the first time he was tickled in the academy he was so confused lol

.He tries to hold his laughter in but is trash at it. Since he's not used to the feeling he breaks in less than a second.

.His laugh is wild and frantic but still has a sense of poise to it. When tickled he just can't control himself!

.Squirms quite a bit tho not as much as Makoto.

.Tickling is the only way to get this man to beg. His egotistical nature goes out the window!

.His worst spots are his ribs, hips and spine

Ler:

.This boy can tickle y'all. After his many encounters with people tickling him he eventually picked up on what to do!

.He is ruthless! He likes the control he can have over people. He starts slowly with torturous slow tickling to ready his lee for the absolute wrecking that is coming their way.

.He won't stop until he gets what he wants from his lee which is usually either them begging or paying him a compliment lmao

.His teasing is more stern. He likes to make his lee admit to their own ticklishness or comment on how dumb they are for not seeing this coming

.Typically goes for a soft to hard tickling approach

Kyoko Kirigiri

Lee:

.She is moderately ticklish. Kyoko isn't normally peoples go to target but when she is they go all out! Hearing her laugh is so uncommon that people just tickle her to hear it.

.Her laugh is soft and elegant but jumps in pitch and pace when tickling her worst spot

.Doesn't squirm much because she sees it as giving in and will try her best not to move

.She is very weak to surprise tickles! They catch her off guard always and it's the only time you will get her to jump!

.Her worst spot is her lower back

Ler:

.Doesn't tickle people that often but when she does she goes all out!

.Her main targets are Makoto, Celestia and occasionally Byakuya

.When she's bored she'll sit next to her lee and trace shapes and words on their back, belly or palm. It surprisingly helps her concentrate. Usually it's Byakuya because he has the most ticklish back out of the group and he hates it but let's her since it helps in the case

.Since her hands are covered in scars she likes not to use them that often so she uses a lot of tools. She likes using feathers and paintbrushes the most

.Her teasing method is what you'd expect from a detective. Likes to ask questions and can easily tell when someone is enjoying being tickled, which she quickly points out

.Typically goes for a softer tickling approach

Aoi Asahina

Lee:

.Extremely ticklish! This girl is the second most ticklish person in the group

.Will kick and squirm when tickled and doesn't hold back like Makoto so her ler better watch out!

.Her laugh is full of cackling and snorting and is very cute! (Tho she doesn't like it)

.She likes being tickled as a form of exercise and/or motivation! If she feels she hasn't preformed well enough she will ask someone to tickle her as punish (usually Sakura)

.Her ler cannot touch her knees. With how many sports she does her knees are a little messed up so even if their careful it'll still hurt her

.Her worst spots are her hips, belly and armpits

Ler:

.Run

.She is the group tickle monster! She is so ruthless and gets into ler moods constantly. Tends not to stop until her ler mood is satisfied

.Will target anybody at anytime but especially during vulnerable moments. If she sees someone reaching up, stretching, stuck somewhere or holding something breakable she will tickle them

.Is the only one who knows Sakura is ticklish

.She is strong and can easily pin her lee down. The only people she cannot pin are Sakura and Mondo

.Despite how ruthless she is she can give softer sweeter tickles! (I headcanon that she acts like a big sis to Makoto and if they're hanging out she'll gently tickle him but tracing his back or scribbling over his belly)

.Master teaser! Even can make Sakura flustered. She uses the classics a lot "tickle tickle tickle!" or "coochie coochie coo!!" But can also pick up on what teases work the best on each person

.Typically goes for a mean and aggressive tickle style

Sakura Ogami

Lee:

.Barely ticklish but most of the group doesn't know she is at all. She does have a few spots that'll get her giggling tho!

.Her laugh is rough and low

.She's only tickled by Aoi so she usually just takes the onslaught. Despite that she does tend to squirm if her ler finds the right spot!

.Her worst spot is her lower back

Ler:

.Another ruthless ler

.When her and Aoi are together and in ler moods the others have to watch out. They're unbeatable together!

.She is likes to tickle people to get them up and moving, sees it as another way to exercise like Aoi does.

.If she sees someone misbehaving she will take it upon herself to punish them with tickles!

.It's no suprise she can pin everyone down. Even Mondo isn't strong enough to stop her. She likes to pin her lees hands above their head with one hand and use the other to tickle all over!

.Her main target is Aoi obviously. She loves hearing her laugh and thinks her laugh is adorable

.Not a teaser and tends to just watch her lee the whole time

.Typically goes for pinning her target and hard tickles

Yasuhiro Hagakure

Lee:

.Weeeeeak to tickling!

.He's pretty ticklish and laughs almost immediately. His laugh is loud and wild! He also tends to snort a lot!

.A kicker but he tries his best not to. When being tickled he will bang his hands against things and pull at his hair

.If the others plan to tickle him they either have to pin him down or tickle in groups because he is fast and will grab at his lers wrists to get them to stop

.Claims he gets visited by tickling ghosts

.His worst spots are his inner thighs, belly button and right underneath his toes

Ler:

.Not a very active ler due to his lazy nature

.Tho when he is in a ler mood he's very playful!Likes to play tickle games a lot. Like pop quizzes where if his lee gets the answer wrong he'll tickle them or he'll test to see how long they can last

.Basically the big brother of the whole group and will tickle the others to embarrass them

.He teases occasionally. Goes for a lot of "oh woah man! You're like, craaazy ticklish!!"

.Typically goes for a laid back kinda tickling style

Kiyotaka Ishimaru

Lee:

.Oh ho boy he's a ticklish little guy!

.Thinks it's super embarrassing being tickled

. His laugh is so loud, he has no filter on it and tends to lose control when tickled

.Is really good at holding his laughter back

.When he's being tickled he tends to bounce and shake a lot. Tends to hide his face in his hands to muffle his laughter and hide his blushing

.Mondo targets him the most and loves to give him tickly kisses. This only flusters him more.

.Weak to teasing

.His worst spot are his ears

Ler:

.Loves tickling people as a motivator!

.Sees it as a good way to bond with his friends despite him being embarrassed by it

.He's very no nonsense however so he tends to only tickle people when he sees it's appropriate

.He's the most merciful ler out of the group and stops immediately when asked. People actually like to go to Taka for tickles because of this

.If he's tickling for long enough he will ask how his lee is doing and of they need a break

.He also is an accidental teaser. Tends to ask his lee of their enjoying themself, not to tease them but he's genuinely curious

.His main targets are Mondo and Chihiro

.Typically goes for a softer tickling approach

Mondo Owada

Lee:

.Holy crap this guy is a scary lee

.Sounds weird right but he is so ticklish it's dangerous. Super strong so he tends to throw people of of him

.He punches to. He accidentally punched Taka once and felt horrible for the longest time. Which is why Taka and Chihiro are the only two who are safe when tickling him. He will try his best to stay still when they tickle him so he doesn't hurt them

.Will NEVER admit it to the others but he really enjoys softer tickles. When cuddling with Taka he (very nervously) asks him to lightly tickle him cause it helps him relax after a hard day

.Taka thinks this is adorable which flusters Mondo more

.His worst spots are his armpits and feet

Ler:

.Just like he's a scary lee he is also a scary ler

.Because Taka yelled at him for using violence to solve everything he switched over to tickling

.If someone pisses him off he will knock them down and destroy them with tickles

.Once he starts it's impossible to stop him. He's too strong to knock off and too stubborn to just give up

.His main targets are Taka, Chihiro and Byakuya (he's only on here cause he pisses Mondo off the most)

.If Taka is being too strict he will lift him from behind and tickle his sides until he promises to relax. If Chihiro is being hard on herself he and Taka will tickle her until she promises to give herself a break

.His teasing is very aggressive like "Hey punk you want me to tickle you more huh? Better watch your mouth then!" "Come on! You can't be that weak, or are you just gonna sit there and take it?"

.Typically goes for a aggressive and hard tickling style

Chihiro Fujisaki

Lee:

.Somft girl. Very ticklish.She squirms and giggles so much. Doesn't kick at people but does kick her legs when tickled

.Ger laugh is so tiny and soft. Its the sweetest thing you'll ever hear. Covers he face when tickled and sometime bites on her knuckle to stop her giggling

.it doesn't help her

.Despite her squirming she doesn't need to be pinned down since she never fights her tickler

.Too soft for teases! Gets flustered so quickly

.Her worst spots are her toes, arches and belly. Surprisingly her hands are also super ticklish

Ler:

.Not a great ler but when she does tickle people she's very sweet about it

.Most of the group knows she doesn't get into ler moods often so when she does they just let her do her thing

.She likes to tickle bellies a lot! She loves tickling Makoto, Aoi and Leon because of their very ticklish tummies. But her prime targets are Taka and Mondo

.She love hearing them laugh! Especially Mondo because of his normally crass and hardass nature

.She can't tease for shit tho. She tries but ends up fluttering herself!

.Typically goes for a soft tickling approach

Leon Kuwata

Lee:

.Fairly ticklish dude!

.His laughter is pretty average but it jumps octaves alot based one where he's being tickled.

.He is also a grabber so group tickles are a must or he needs to be pinned

.He's decent at holding his laughter in but once he breaks he goes down hard. This dude erupts with laughter it's almost startling

.The others like to target him when he's singing! Hiro likes to see how good he can sing or how long he can sing when he's being tickled

.He can not take teasing well and will yell at his ler the whole time to shut up

.His worst spots are his hips and belly

Ler:

.Tho not as bad as some of the others he is still a rather mean ler

.His go to move is to sit on his lees legs or hips and poke all over their torso. Will also lean down into his lees neck and nuzzle, using his goatee as a tickle tool. He loves giving raspberries funnily enough, he thinks the sound and reaction it gets is funny

.He likes to target Sayaka, Makoto, Kyoko and Byakuya the most

.He doesn't tease very often but if he does he goes for basic teases "ooo someone's ticklish!" "Tickle tickle ya big softie!!" "Can't get away from me!"

.Typically uses a mix of softish and harder tickling and also raspberries

Celestia Ludenberg

Lee:

.Tickling Celeste is hard. She is moderately ticklish but had everyone convinced she wasn't for the longest time

.Is so good at holding in her laughter and fooling the others it took them forever to get her to crack. And the person to do that was Aoi! She refused to give up and eventually she broke. (Aoi was so proud of herself). After that she decided there was no point in holding back much anymore unless it was a competition

.Her laugh is elegant and smooth. Unless you tickle her bad spot! Than it gets higher and squeaky

.She's able to sit still for the most part but her ler can tell when she starts to break if they see her playing with her hair

.She's practically unaffected by teasing. The only ones who were able to fluster her were Aoi and Kyoko

.Her worst spot is between her shoulder blades

Ler:

.Wicked ler but doesn't tickle often

.She mainly only targets Kyoko cause she loves her laugh

.Likes to use her pointed finger ring as a tickle tool

.Uses slow but hard tickling on her lees

.Is a very teasy ler! "Oh dear what I'm Into do? I can't just not tickle you now can I?" "Please someone as sensitive as you are deserves this! Now just sit still and let me have my fun dear!"

.Typically uses a slow and torturous tickle method

Toko Fukawa

Lee:

.Have mercy on this girl. Not as ticklish as Makoto or Aoi but she cannot handle it

.She's a giggling fool right away. Her laugh is full of snorts, squeaks and screaming and she absolutely hates it

.Will try desperately to get away, squirms and is not afraid to slap

.The others like to tickle her when she starts getting annoying or too self depreciating. They have to be careful tho cause if she switches personalities when being tickled the ler could lose their fingers. The more she learns to control Jack the more the others tickle her

.She wants Byakuya to tickle her but he refuses

.Komaru however tickles her all the time. (I know she's not in the first game and not on my list but I love these two very much)

.She's weak to teasing

.Her worst spots are her armpits and the backs of her knees

Ler:

.Not a great ler since she struggles with social situations

.When she does tickle people it's soft and quick. Unless it's Komaru since she's very close to her

.She gets over Byakuya and develops feelings for Komaru instead. She thinks her laugh is adorable and loves being close to her

.Only when she stops obsessing over and creeping out Byakuya she was able to get close enough to tickle him. Tho he didn't let her do it for long but it was a way of showing her he's beginning to trust her more now that's she's not being a creep

.She doesn't tease. She thinks its childish

.Typically she uses a softer fast tickling method

Sayaka Maizono

Lee:

.Fairly ticklish!

.She thinks tickling is fun, likes being on the receiving end of it

.Squeals and laughs loudly when tickled. Has a surprisingly loud and chaotic laugh when tickled

.Is the only one in the group not even remotely embarrassed by tickling

.The others like to sneak up on her when she's cooking and poke her sides

.Squirms a bit but mostly just let's her ler have fun

.When she's had enough she'll lightly swat at their hands

.She likes being teased! She likes the attention and being told she's cute

.Her worst spots are the back of her knees and the sides and back of her neck

Ler:

.She loves tickling people as well!

.She has long nails she likes to keep painted which make for nasty ticklers! She loves using them to scrape and scribble

.Usually when she's in a ler mood she'll just walk up to someone and be like "I need to tickle you! I know you want me to! I'm psychic". If she's set on tickling that specific person and they put up a fight she will either whine until they let her or just knock them over and pin them down

.She can be a mean ler but is fairly merciful

.Her teases are sweet and she loves to pepper her lee in compliments

.Typically goes for a moderately mean tickling method and uses her nails a lot

Junko Enoshima

Lee:

.Crazy lee! No like she's crazy. Will trash and scream when tickled and threaten her ler

.If she's not pinned your screwed cause she will hurt you

.Out of everyone in the group she hated being tickled the most. Hates the lack of control but likes the despair the lack of control brings

.Her laugh is loud and crazy. She screams, snorts and swears a lot

.She hates being teased

.Her worst spot is her hips

Ler:

.The most vicious ler

.Loves to tickle people until they vmbeg for mercy

.She doesn't always give it to them

.Uses tickling as a punishment and/or torture

.The others are frightened of her when she's in a ler mood

.She's also referred to as a tickle monster but she's more of a monster than Aoi is. She's ruthless and merciless

.She also wears long stiletto nails which tickle like crazy

.She targets everyone. If one of them piss her off the others won't see them for hours because she is absolutely wrecking them

.Typically goes for an evil torturous tickling method

Mukuro Ikusaba

Lee:

.Isn't really that ticklish

.Trained her body to fight against the feeling for the military

.There is only a couple places she's ticklish but only Junko knows of them

.If she's tickled there she'll release soft bubbly laughter!

.Covers her mouth when laughing

.Kicks a lot but can control it for the most part

.The only teases she can't handle are compliments

.Her worst spot is her jawline

Ler:

.Not as mean as Junko but tends to be her sidekick

.Will mainly pin down lees for Junko but will occasionally join in

.She's not that good at tickling so she mainly focuses on her lees death spots because no matter what it'll usually tickle

.Doesn't tease because she thinks it's foolish and dumb

.She sometimes laughs along tho cause she thinks it's funny

.Typically tries to go for a rougher tickling method

This took like 2 and a half hours oml

[sichengtual]

— summary: in which seungcheol, a high-collared executive at his dad’s firm, signs up for a fake dating service in an attempt to make everyone believe his life is more than just the office.

— pairing: choi seungcheol x reader.

— genre(s): fluff, humor, angst.

— au: fake dating, office.

— word count: 2091.

masterlist.

part two — business meeting.

“Thank you so much for meeting me here.” 

Seungcheol is nervous, and you can tell.

He sits up straight in his seat, shadows grazing upon his face like silhouettes, contrasting against the bright shimmer of his golden specs. He looks completely comfortable in his own skin, posture relaxed yet composed and facial expression completely at ease — and yet, there is something about him that lets you know not everything is the way it seems. It might be the fact that his grip on the napkin is a bit too tight for comfort and the tapping of his foot against the floor is a bit too loud for you to ignore, but you decide not to dwell on it when his eyes meet yours. 

“No problem,” you answer, crossing your legs under the table. “It’s a bit far from my place but when you said you’d pay for the meal, I really couldn’t say no.” 

“Yeah, I figured I’d kill two birds with one stone, you know,” he says, taking a sip from his wine glass. “This place is really close to my office, and I figured actually going out to lunch would be a very welcomed change.”

“Oh, so you’re actually addicted to your job?” A small laugh leaves your lips, accompanying your words. 

“When did I ever-”

“I just figured,” you shrugged.

Seungcheol was an interesting figure. At the first meeting, he was nice and extremely polite, which didn’t really differ from the way he spoke to you on the phone and through his texts. He was handsome, which, thinking of in addition to his personality, didn’t really add up to the kind of guys you usually have to fake a date with. Yoon Jeonghan and the like were handsome men, granted, but they never showed as much consideration as Choi Seungcheol, and that was coming from the first time you actually met him. Not that truth is written in first impressions but the one you were getting from him was a pretty good sign.

“Right,” he mutters, cheeks lighting up in embarrassment. “Am I really that easy to read?” 

You let out a laugh. “No, I’m just pretty good at reading people.” 

You wouldn’t consider yourself an overly attentive person, an expert at noticing and analyzing body language, or anything of the sort. You are just familiar with pretending, as you’ve always liked to say, and one of the things that comes with it is knowing people act in the exact same way they want to be perceived. Sometimes they succeed, and sometimes they don’t, but nevertheless, the method is always the same no matter the result. And, as such, you’ve found that there are a few cues that fall front and center every time a person is just creating the version of themselves they want you to see. 

“Anyways,” you say, clearing your throat. “What is it exactly that you need from me?” 

“Well, I was thinking we could pretend we’re —” 

“No, no, I know I’m here to let people believe we’re bangin’,” you blurt out. You notice Seungcheol’s eyes widening and cheeks lighting up at your words, and a part of you can’t believe that is really the most authentic reaction your classic line has gotten to the date. There is an unspoken rule of sorts based purely on how  “But who is it that we need to convince? An angry ex, a controlling parent, a meddlesome friend…”

“Meddlesome brother, more like,” he comments, voice a bit softer than it was a moment before. “He uh, he dates a lot, and I don’t, and seems to be under the impression I need to follow his example.” 

“It’s kinda weird how we’re expected to follow someone’s lead, isn’t it? Even when it’s something as personal as dating.” 

“Do you…”

“Oh, no,” you say. “I do it because the money comes in handy, you know. I don’t think anyone in my life actually ever believes I’m in a real, serious relationship.” 

“Do you mind if I ask why?” 

“Well, I’ve never been in one,” you answer, and it’s now your turn to grow shy at your own words. 

It’s not that you’re ashamed of it, because you know there’s nothing wrong with the pace your love life has been running by, but it’s not something you simply blurt out whenever you meet someone new. And especially not someone you’re about to date, even if it’s fake, because well, after all, you’re not exempt from the trying to be perceived a certain way. It’s never easy to tear a wall down, let out some sort of vulnerability. And it certainly isn’t like you. 

You turn your head and look outside, eyes peering through the windowsill that covers the entire wall right next to you. The restaurant rises on the top of some thirty-story building, and looking out from the window makes your stomach turn. It’s not about the height, per se, but the effect it has on everything around you. On the clouds, and how some sort of you feels as if they’ve gotten closer, and realest to the touch — and on the people, and how the mere height you’re looking at them from makes the whole scene kind of surreal. It’s as if the height has turned an every-day setting into a scene right out of a movie, characters and all, because the more you look at the figures moving on the ground below, the more their silhouettes blur in and out with each other. 

You shake your head. 

“So, do you have a plan already? Or have you at least thought of how we’re going to make your brother believe we’re dating?” You ask. “I usually go out on a few dinner dates or tag along to some event, but I… uh, thought maybe you’d figured something out already.”

“Well, I don’t think my brother will actually care if we’re together for a long time or not,” Seuncheol started. He hadn’t given it much thought, but considering the way Mingyu treated his own relationships, he didn’t really think his brother would look into the actual time Seungcheol ‘dated’ someone. “You could maybe stop by the office someday and we’ll come have lunch after that, call me when he’s around… I don’t know. I think he just has to see us together sometimes, don’t you think?” 

“That works for me,” you smile. “So, just a few days?”

“Yeah, just a few days.”

Seungcheol raises his cup, and as you imitate his gesture, you clink your cups together. 

“Well, I guess it’s on.”

“I can’t believe you’re doing it again.”

Vernon is looking at you from the other side of the couch. It comes out somewhat undecipherable, and a part of you wants to scold him for speaking with his mouth full, but he’d only shake his head at you as a response. He chews on his cereal as he finishes speaking, bowl already half finished resting on his lap. 

“It’s not that big of a deal,” you roll your eyes. “We’re just going out for lunch for a few days, that’s it. I’m barely even gonna get to know him.”

“Yeah, but after last time, I thought you were gonna quit… all of that.”

“That was different,” you say. Your voice is firm, words coming out of your mouth in complete certainty. “And it was a long time ago.”

“It’s only been a year.”

“A lot can happen in a year! 

“Yeah, I’m sure you’ve had some remarkable personal growth happening this year, with all those Nicholas Sparks novels you’ve been reading,” he laughs. “Anyways, I kinda get why you said yes.” 

You’re not sure whether he’s serious or not, because the tone of his voice lets nothing away. He always speaks in the same ‘I’m joking but I’m also not joking’ manner, which leaves you with his facial expressions to kind of get some idea of the actual direction conversations could take. 

“Oh, please, let me out of my misery,” you let out. You laugh a bit as you mutter the words, resting your back against the armrest of the couch. If there was one thing Vernon was good at, which you had told him plenty of times, was thrifting furniture. There definitely had to be some talent behind finding couches that felt just as new but actually were a fifth part of the price. “Enlighten me, you mind reader.”

“Come on, I saw his car when he was dropping you off,” he scoffs. Shaking his head, he takes in another spoonful of cereal in his mouth, chewing before he continues his grand, expert reasoning. “Although I’m not sure why he would need to come to you for… you know, whatever it is that you’ll do. Full offense, by the way.”

“Offense taken.”

“I’m just saying, if I had a car like that I wouldn’t hire someone to fake date me, if you know what I’m saying,” he shrugged, which would have diverted your attention if only he had not laughed as soon as he had finished speaking. You knew him better than that. 

“Oh God, are you saying the only reason you’re oh so painfully single is because you don’t drive a Mercedes Benz?” 

“I’m just saying maybe I wouldn’t need to have you and Chan tag along with me to the movies if I drove a Mercedes Benz!”

“Tag along with you? I’m the one that always pays at the movies, you idiot,” you accuse. “And don’t forget you’re the one that bought the Nicholas Sparks novels.”

Vernon spreads out his legs, kicking your feet off the couch in the process. He pretends not to notice, smirking and turning to face the TV, which, surprisingly, was playing yet another episode of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. You’re convinced that Vernon’s obsession with watching reality shows while eating cereal in his underwear every single Friday night might have more to do with him being single than not having a Mercedes Benz. 

“Poor guy, if he only knew your feet fucking stink,” he mutters under his breath before laughing at something on the TV. “I hope he asks for a refund! I would do it if it were me.” 

“One of these days, I’m actually going to kick you out,” you retort. You’re not, and he knows that, but that doesn’t stop you from “And I’ll let you know I’m actually a real catch.”

“Is that why you’re just as single as I am?” He laughs, turning his head to face you before sticking up his nose in your direction. Why was he even your friend? “Oh, and also, you’ve been kicking me out since we were in college.” 

“Yeah, I really should have done that when we were in college.”

“What, me?” 

“You wish,”

You laugh and roll your eyes, turning to look at the TV. A box of Cheerios sits opened on the coffee table, and you stretch your arm for it just as Vernon slurps the milk from his bowl. Unlike your roommate, you’re not caught up with the show, so you lazily keep your eyes on the screen as you snack on the honey-flavored cereal and let your thoughts roam free. A part of you keeps stuck on the lunch date — there was something about Seungcheol that was making it impossible for you to let go of your encounter. He was certainly different from the guys you had fake dated, because, oddly enough, you could tell some part of him was really unsure about the whole thing. He had been nervous, and you could sense it wasn’t just about meeting you, but of everything that could come out of it. 

He had been extremely nice, and as such, you had decided you were about to make it as easy for him as you could. Not because he had hired you, but because there was something in the way he smiled at you that let you know he was going to do the exact same thing for you. You had set up a plan in your head, and you would treat the whole thing as you would when making a new friend. 

A few days were enough to form a friendship, were they not? 

But, by now, you should also know plans don’t always work out. Time passes, and things change, and there is no security behind whatever words were first spoken. It always turns out that words are not written in stone, and neither are business deals.

[mellarkably]

what do you think about some people saying ben is a fet!shizer for dating aneesa right after devi? not that i agree with the idea, i very much disagree, but i wanted to know what others thought about it bc i think its an extremely farfetched accusation and kinda insensitive to assume so (speaking as a desi ofc)

hey anon! i'm gonna preface this answer by saying i am a south indian woman. and i'm gonna tell you that i agree, 100%... that that is a farfetched accusation to make.

had ben pursued aneesa romantically (or even platonically) right after she was introduced to the class (and called devi 2.0 by snickering classmates, which, ugh. where do i even begin) i probably would have been able to at least understand where the 'fetishizer' comments are coming from. however, that was not the case. we only see him flirting with aneesa in the hallways (mutually reciprocated by her btw) AFTER their first meeting and interaction at the tattoo parlor, where they hit it off quite well—devi, the third party, vividly describes their banter as being laced with mutual attraction, aneesa says she had fun with ben that night, and from what we see in the later episodes as their friendship and relationship blossoms, ben and aneesa honestly get along quite well (aside from some compatibility issues which will only impact them long term. and they were probably included towards the end to have him and the audience realize devi might be better for him in the long run despite how great aneesa is) so its not even like he's clinging on to aneesa because she's solely his indian chick rebound. he does genuinely like her.

devi and aneesa's races have never been a reason for ben's romantic interest in the first place. ben is attracted to devi because of her wit, confidence, and vulnerability. ben is attracted to aneesa for mostly different reasons, and she offers something different to him as a girlfriend, like the actor and writer themselves have said, yet race has never been a reason for his pursuit of either. they both have very different, but interesting personalities and individual hobbies! let's not dumb them down to just the two desi love interests.

i also find it bizarre that ben's caucasian ex-girlfriend shira is never remembered when it comes to discussions like this. the idea of a white man dating two desi women consecutively for their personalities is very possible, especially considering the fact that ben has like, three real friends to begin with, one of them being aneesa, the other devi (but even that is stunted for a while) and oliver, i guess. it's not like the pool was big to begin with. and presumed racial motivations aside; i understand why some may assume he is using aneesa as a rebound, but i do not agree with this idea entirely—while his decision to quickly move on with aneesa might have been instigated by him seeing devi with paxton constantly and thinking devi would never choose him, as well as his sweltering need to get over his very clear residual feelings for devi, the simple fact is that aneesa is objectively a wonderful girl and if i were him, i would love to ask out someone that great who for once chose me first. the dude was basically getting curb stomped by everyone in his life till then and he suffers from chronic fucking loneliness. speaking as a benvi, aneesa and him do genuinely connect and a lot of their meaningful interactions are outside of devi’s view anyway (like him helping her with her ed) so its not even like it was all for show. let him have this win.

tldr: sorry for, like fabiola would say, popping off, but i find this accusation stupid. in general, there are a lot of weird takes people have about ben specifically but yeah this one ticks me off a little more than the others, for obvious personal reasons. but at the end of the day, free speech is a right and people are allowed to have their opinions, which i respect—and this is my opinion on this particularly bad take some have. cool? cool.