#thats why i called like i said id call a month ago but decided that was too extreme and WAY too soon

[timeisacephalopod]

Ended up calling CAS (Canadian CPS Americans) and I did not expect to have complicated feelings on such a thing because it's not as if the call wasn't needed years ago if I'm honest, but I typically do not like involving myself in such things especially when so many people make frivolous calls to cops and agencies like this. Seriously, child abuse is the crime that receives the most false accusations and of course I'm not talking out my ass, but I also don't want to disrupt a bunch of kids lives over their mothers bullshit.

On the flip side me messing around with their lives at this point is probably the best option for them and that's not something I say lightly, I told the guy twice I was making that call with a heavy heart but what little I know is deeply disturbing to me. And specified that I believe my oldest niece is the primary victim in part because she's a vocal kid, good for her. But that's done, I can at least know I tried for those kids and did what I could to make myself sound credible and give what info I know even if I made it clear that I don't know probably anything really. But I'm tired of waiting for change from someone who isn't capable of it. Those kids need better, it's not like I didn't wait 13 years for her to do better by those kids. It's not like I said anything untrue to anyone involved either, so complicated feelings or not know I didn't just run around making nasty frivolous phone calls. I'm genuinely concerned my oldest niece will end up dead and that the only thing done about it on shitheads end will be protecting my nieces murderer and if I did nothing about that I'd never be able to live with it.

[modelbus]

YOOOO MODDLEE

yeah I did it again.

(Help I have a problem of disappearing into thin air)

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR PART THREE OF CUT CHAOS SHEBSJNSUH

you said you would write 500 chapters.. but like obviously exaggerating..? (Kiddinggg)

tho a few more couldn’t hurt..

juuuust saying if you ever feel like it I will eventually see it and it will eventually make my week. <3333

BUT THATS NOT WHY WE ARE HERE! (I’m sorry my requests are always so long and dramatic bro I just brain like that)

Actual request:

ok so like I knowww cut chaos started from rumours but like rumours are an easy way to start plot lines k? (Also I use she pronouns out of habit but they is pog too)

the friends in question: Tommyinnit (duh), Wilbur (moosic boi), Ranboo (generation loss trauma guy), Possibly Slimecicle?? I know he’s not someone you do requests for normally buttt if you’re okay with it that would be POG, or if slime is a no, tubbo!

SO a few months ago Y/N started working on an SMP with some minimal custom mods, some fancy texture packs, maybe some data packs, and its like this BIGGG project, BUT its not public and its taking a lot of her time, so she can only really do a few streams and most of the time because her schedule is so full its hard to work out streams with friends so, she is alone. with the internet being the internet people started to think something was up, some annoyed viewers made a few rumours and people kept making things up and escalating things until people were saying she did all sorts of horrible things to “lose all her friends” but one of the most popular theories was that she was emotionally abusing them (??? Internet wildin ig) she ignored them while mostly finishing the stuff for the smp, but decided to address it in a very- y/n way. Getting four friends to come to her house and hide slightly off camera while she made a purposefully bad apology video only for them to jump out at the end and her to stand up and be like “YALL REALLY THOUGHT I WAS SOME MASTER MANIPULATOR?! I’M JUST A FUNKY LITTLE CHAOTIC MINECRAFT GOBLIN N’ I’VE BEEN WORKING ON AN SMP THIS WHOLE TIME!! ITS GONNA BE SUPER COOL AND THESE FOUR PLUS ALOOOOT MORE PEOPLE ARE GONNA BE THERE I’M POSTING THE CREATORS SOON AND ITS LAUNCHING IN A MONTH!, SO STOP ASSUMING I’M A BAD PERSON AND GET PUMPED BITCHES!” something along those lines, maybe at the end a little peek at what people are responding with. (Obviously no pressure, but like id be cool) (thanks for considering deity of the busses and models.)

HOW WE LIKING THE SILLIES?!?

P.S I’m not always an angst gremlin (just most of the time..) - ✨🌌🌙 Annon

I DO BE LIKING THE SILLIES (and thank you for elevating me to the level of deity, my ego has been inflated)

Pairing: Cc! Wilbur, Tommy, Ranboo, Charlie Slimecicle x Gn!Reader (platonic)

Roaring Rumors

Life was all about sacrifices.

Or, that’s what you keep telling yourself when you’re up at 1AM working on your server. Putting together an SMP is harder than it sounds; texture packs, data packs, comparability, world-building, even the (seemingly) simply act of contacting people to play on it. For the amount of time you spent on your computer, your hands might as well be part of your keyboard.

Sleep wasn’t the only thing you sacrificed. Streaming, even just fun ones with your friends, had quickly became rare. Although you loved to hop on a call while coding still, your online presence had severely receded.

You just keep telling yourself that sacrifices are necessary. That the payoff would be worth it.

And it really would be, but you just had to get there first. Which was proving harder than you had thought.

At the very least, you still had your friends. Wilbur sitting silently on call with you while you work, Tommy dragging you out of your room, Ranboo always willing to get excited over your progress. Every day you woke up with a text from your groupchat—typically Charlie—just filling you in on the latest internet trend by a meme.

Today, your news comes from Wilbur and Tommy.

“I think they’re canceling you.” Wilbur says casually while you’re in the midst of detailing the hunger bar for a texture pack.

“Ooh, you’re a wrong’un!” Tommy yells in the background of Wilbur’s side of the call.

The three of you had been idly chatting while each doing your own thing. Wilbur and Tommy were engaged in some Twitter competition, as far as you know.

“Canceling me for what?” You ask, deciding to ignore Tommy’s shouting.

“Existing, I think.” Wilbur answers.

“So the normal.”

“The normal.”

Although the conversation stops there, you can’t help yourself. Later, during one of the few hours you dedicate to getting sleep to stay alive, you pull open Twitter on your phone. Your last tweet was nearly two weeks ago, so it’s been a minute.

But you just want to make sure nothing horrible happened while you were busy. You’re a content creator, this is normal. Definitely. You definitely aren’t just justifying this so you can do it.

You swipe through tweets, heading to trending and searching your name. Tweets load, making your mouth run dry. Wilbur wasn’t joking.

All you can do is scroll, reading as the messages get wilder and wilder. From people saying they were missing you to theories on why nobody was streaming you. Each one seemed considerably more implausible, and before you know it you’re glaring at your screen like it’s to fault.

Some thought you had grown apart.

Some thought you had a falling out.

And, apparently, a lot thought you were emotionally abusing them. Or, depending on the tweet, manipulating them.

Quite honestly, you didn’t even know how they got the idea. The long threads of explanations did nothing but send you into a spiral, biting your bottom lip so hard that it bleeds.

You were so close to finishing the SMP. It needed just a few things, then you'd be able to start scheduling to get it up and running. You didn't have the time nor mental capacity to deal with whatever the fuck is going on right now.

Is it a good choice? Maybe not. But do you still ignore the accusations? Hell yes.

-

By the time you get even closer to finishing the preparations for your SMP, you've come up with the perfect plan to address the (quite stupid) rumors. It'll be a two-in-one; you address the rumors and announce the SMP at the same time.

"How long do I have to lay on this floor?" Tommy asks, stretched out behind your chair.

"Nobody asked you to lay on the floor." Wilbur points out, standing next to your computer. Charlie, on the other side, laughs.

"Yeah man, you wanted to be down there."

"Besides, I'm doing great down here!" Ranboo chimes in.

You roll your eyes, grinning. "I'm about to start stream, so it won't be for much longer. Just wait for my cue, yeah?"

Tommy grumbles, but shuts up. You take that as your chance to start the stream, switching it off your waiting screen and waving to the camera. Your chosen stream title has brought in a bit more than your usual casual steam view number, "Talking about some serious stuff," leading people to believe there will be drama. And if it's drama they want, it's drama you'll give.

"Hello, hello!" You smile, leaning back. "So I've decided to talk about some things. Namely, the Twitter shit. I am so sorry for everything, and I mean that. A lot. Sincerely. There's meaning in it."

Tommy snorts, and from the corner of your eye you catch Wilbur kick him to shut him up.

"What am I sorry about?" You ask rhetorically, acting like you read it off of chat. "Oh, you know. People have been saying all types of stuff. The things about me manipulating my friends?" There's a pause while you let that sink in. "So, I'm sorry."

It's a purposefully shitty apology, but you sigh and act like its heartfelt for a few moments, nodding towards chat. Their messages are mostly confused, especially because it isn't one emote-only.

"Sorry you guys are so gullible!" You shout, and Tommy practically tackles you.

Wilbur's the one to fix your chair, Ranboo and Charlie appearing next to you within moments.

"You guys really thought this one could manipulate me? The master?" Charlie asks the stream, pointing at you.

"Yeah!" Tommy shouts, way too energetic for someone who complained five minutes ago about being on the floor. "We're the master manipulators! Get fooled!"

"I, for one, haven't manipulated anyone-" Ranboo starts, but Tommy slaps a hand over his mouth and nods empathetically.

"Yeah, I don't know what you guys were thinking, but I've just been playing fucking Minecraft for the past few months nonstop." You laugh.

"Nonstop. It's a problem." Wilbur nods.

"It is not a problem!" Pause. "Anyways, I made an SMP! And that's where I've been! Not because I've been manipulating my friends or some shit, stop being dumbasses."

"It'll be super cool!" Ranboo adds in helpfully.

"These four-"

"That's us!" Charlie points around at himself, Wilbur, Tommy, and Ranboo.

"-will be on it, plus a lot more. It'll be posting those people soon! As in, check your Twitter obsessively guys! The SMP will be in about a month, too, so get fucking excited! I want to see some hype!"

"WOO!" Tommy screams, making everyone cringe at having their eardrums ruptured.

"So that's all I wanted to talk about I think. Anything to add, guys?" You glance around at the four surrounding you with a grin.

"One thing." Charlie nods, leaning in really close. "I have a secret. This SMP, it's actually-" He hits your end stream button mid-sentence. "And that's how you keep 'em interested."

-

Ycgmaenthusist NEW SMP NEW SMP NEW SMP NEW SMP

Mammalianeighingreflecenthusiest We are dumb as fuck aren’t we

Poabsenthusiest i will RIOT IN THE STREETS if any of yall be mean to MY STREAMER -> Cmwylenthusist FR I GOT TWO FISTS AND A CAUSE

[reyski]

could I get armin x reader where they both have crushes on eachother and eren and jean tease them about it? maybe a confession scene? if not thats fine, make sure you drink water and sleep and all that

i’m on a bit of an armin kick so i thought id do this just for kicks. also sorry if you dont like fics with drug use, but i think its incredibly hot. 

pairing: armin x reader (post timeskip media: attack on titan content warnings: drinking, joint smoking note: gender neutral reader!! 

it was a little hard to admit to yourself that you had a crush on armin. you had met through mutual friends (eren) a couple years ago, and even then you were quick to dismiss the little butterflies you felt when he would sit close to you, or say your name. but after a couple months of secretly pining you decided it would be best to admit it, at least to yourself.

a normally smart person, it was entirely too embarrassing how you would trip and fumble over your words when you were around him. letting out nervous laughs, and trying to play off your mistakes was becoming increasingly annoying. and after your friend's weekly hangouts you were bombarded with texts from eren and jean with texts to "just fucking admit it already" and "jesus christ he probably already knows". but every time you thought about asking armin to talk in private, and confessing your little crush your hands shook and your chest became tight just thinking about how he would react.

why would you risk your friendship with armin over a stupid crush that would probably just end in shambles? jean always told you that you had nothing to worry about, and that even if armin turned you down you would always be friends. but you knew that it would be different, not something that your friendship could just bounce back from.

after class one day you and eren, who had been working on a sociology paper in the library, were sitting waiting for lunch that you had just ordered.

"come on you know he'd probably faint if you told him you like him, right?" eren prompted.

"yeah yeah yeah, as if your little conjecture about what armin 'would do' is gonna get me to fold" you retorted, making eren give you a disgruntled look. his lips curving down into a small frown.

"well you're never gonna get anywhere with that attitude"

"im not trying to get anywhere, just leave it alone" another annoyed look was shot your way.

"fine. but if i go crazy waiting for one of you to make a move it's on you" eren said finally relinquishing after the number on his receipt was called by the woman behind the counter.

"fine" you said to yourself quietly as he walked away to pick up the food.

the next couple of days you spent with your mind crowded by the idea of armin possibly mirroring your desire. every time you tried to sit down and work on an assignment questions flooded your brain. you tried to weigh out the pros and cons of confessing, but ultimately it made no difference in your plight.

suddenly it was a couple hours before you were going over to jean's house to see everyone and you were staring at nearly your entire closet thrown around your room.

‘ugh fuck what am i doing, it's not like anyone's taking notes on what i’m wearing’ you noticed you were definitely thinking of armin when you said 'anyone' and groaned a second time, hating how much having a little crush could affect you.

finally picking up something off the floor and wiggling your way into it, fixing your now-tousled-hair and looking into the mirror once again.

‘eh good enough’ you said defeatedly, picking up your things and giving yourself one more once-over to make sure you weren't missing anything. your heart was beating uncomfortably after getting in your car.

after driving over to jean's you parked a block away and quickly walking up his driveway, noticing you were 20 minutes late.

‘shit im definitely getting flack for this’, you knocked on the door shouting a quick "open up!", and hearing shuffling coming towards the door followed by the jingling of the handle and a "jean how the hell do you unlock this thing" along with more shuffling.

when the door finally opened up you were greeted by the friendly faces of sasha and jean beaming at you. hearing a chorus of "hi"s as you walked in and set your stuff down. deliberately not looking around too much in fear of making eye contact with armin and giving yourself away.

"geez what took you so long, we’re almost through the first round" connie remarked as you turned around to say hi to everyone.

"oh wowww, did you save me one?" you asked, mildly joking to connie.

you felt a presence next to you and a small nudge on your shoulder, followed by the clearing of a throat.

"here, i saved mine too so you wouldn't feel too left out" armin said, handing you a can of whatever eren got his hands on this time, shooting you a small smile. you accepted it, returning the smile with a "oh thanks!", cracking open the tab and taking a small sip while observing your friends all going back to whatever they were talking about before you arrived.

you sat around and joked for a while, getting to the end of your can, and settling for whatever other shitty alcohol there was lying around. slowly becoming more inebriated by the minute, you resigned to sitting on the sofa listening to mikasa and sasha hash it out over a small argument, laughing along to the commotion.

the alcohol in your system had dulled any previous worries about armin, so immersed in the conversation that you almost forgot about it until he sat down next to you.

feeling the sofa dip you looked over, "oh hey, hows it going" you asked.

"im ok, just needed a break from eren and connie. too much energy" he said slowly, also obviously feeling the effects of the alcohol.

"you dont say? god i would have never guessed" you joked. armin cracked a smile and let out a small chuckle at your sarcasm.

a bit of silence between the two of you before he leaned over and whispered for you to follow him over to the kitchen. you gave him a quizzical look and slowly stood up to follow him where he was headed. as you rounded the corner into the kitchen you saw him leaning over to pull something out of his backpack, turned so you couldn’t see exactly what he was getting. looking over your shoulder to see what was happening out in the main room you noticed everyone carrying on, not noticing your sudden absence. 

“ok lets go” armin said turning around with a joint sitting in the palm of his hand. 

raising your eyebrows you responded “oh i didn’t know we were smoking tonight, i would have brought my stuff”. 

“dont worry about it, i just brought it incase anyone was interested” his eyes flickered to yours through his bangs and then back down to the joint. 

“right right, should i go see who wants to join” you started turning towards the open door before armin made a ‘shhh’ sound and waved his hand towards you. 

“i was thinking that we could just go alone, it’s not really that much anyways” he said, even though it was clearly untouched and enough to go around your group at least twice. 

“oh! yeah sure lets go” you said quietly, heart just about jumping out of you, body trembling at the slight hint that he wanted to be alone with you. you shook your head a bit, trying to return to the present moment and not overthink it. he probably just wanted to get away from the commotion. 

you walked together quietly through the back part of the house, reaching the backdoor. armin pulled it open and ushered you through, closing the door behind him. you both sat down on the small steps down to jean’s backyard. armin fished a lighter from his pants pockets, fumbling trying to find it, offering the joint in your direction, asking if you wanted the first hit. you took it out of his hand, placing between your fingers as armin held the lighter up allowing you to get it started. 

the peaceful glow of the lighter spread across your faces, illuminating the darkness for a second before you leaned back and puffed out a cloud of smoke toward the empty yard, sighing in contentment. you handed the joint over, letting armin have a turn and letting the feeling of smoke in your lungs settle, relaxing a little more into your spot on the steps. quietly you passed it back and forth until it was just about gone, and the burn of the weed was almost intolerable. 

“do you want to go back in?” armin asked after another moment, looking at you but not making any movements to get up. 

“no, its nice out here, and besides if we go back in now they’ll be mad we smoked without them” you said in response, smiling a bit to yourself thinking about your friends and their antics. 

“true” armin giggled “i just wanted to make sure you weren’t bored of me” he joked. your eyes widening. 

“never! i don’t know why i’ve been so quiet lately, just thinking about things” you explained, looking at armin meekly. his eyebrows raising in question. 

“thinking about what? you know i’m always here to talk” he sounded genuinely interested in what was troubling you. 

“eh nothing, just life things you know? don’t worry about it” you dismissing his question knowing full well what exactly you were so worked up about. 

“yeah i get it, life’s weird like that. sometimes i get so wrapped up in it i don’t know what to do with myself” you shot him a concerned look, turning a little more towards him. 

“you want to tell me about it?” you asked, prompting armin to let out a laugh, his head falling back.

“hey! you cant just brush me off and then ask the exact same question to me” he smiled, and you felt yourself jump a bit at his beauty. 

“i’m not brushing you off, its just hard to talk about” 

“you want to try?” 

“only if you tell me about yours too. otherwise i’m kind of getting the short end of the stick” you persuaded him, in a moment of bravery. 

“oh gosh we wouldn’t want that” the sides of his eyes crinkled a bit, giving you the go ahead to start talking. 

you felt the repercussions of your words coming back to you, not knowing whether to lie, make an excuse, or just tell him the truth. your heart started beating faster, and butterflies erupted in your stomach. small bits of sound came out of your mouth in an attempt to start talking but no words came out. 

“i ... ah i don’t know its just...uh” you fumbled as armin looked intently at you, eyes gleaming in the most spectacular way, letting you know that he was listening. 

“i think theres something wrong with me” you relinquished as armin’s gaze turned to worry. 

“theres nothing wrong with you, you’re perfect” he said plainly, as if he hadn’t just frazzled you even more and given you the best compliment you’d ever received. you felt your face grow hotter, cheeks buzzing with heat. 

“is that what you’ve been so worried about?” armin asked, mouth creating a small frown. you shook your head, not saying anything else.

a moment passed, you both sank back into the silence of the minute before. you turned your gaze to your lap, but could still feel armin looking at you. you felt him wanting to say something, but another moment passed with nothing said. there was definitely something different about this silence, it wasn’t as comfortable as the one before, and you could tell there was something hanging in the air. you felt the pressure building up inside you, feeling that maybe your comment made it awkward. in a moment of recklessness, and an attempt to break the silence, you slipped out,

“i think i might like you but i didn’t want to make things weird and i know you probably don’t like me back but now its already weird so i might as well tell you” breathing deeply, not looking over at armin who remained in silence. your cheeks somehow even hotter than they were before, and your whole body trembling. 

another moment passed, and you finally decided to take a small peek over at armin. you slid your eyes to the side not moving your head, and he sat eyes wide open, and lips sightly parted in surprise (image). your eyes darted back down into your lap, already regretting your actions, and preparing to just get up and go back inside. your eyes burned in a tell-tale way, you shifted to get up. 

a little tug on your arm “hey” you paused to see if he would say anything else, “i think...we feel the same way” he finished, and to both of your relief you turned back around and sat back down. 

“you do?”

“yeah” 

“thats good” 

“hah, yeah” he chuckled, his own cheeks turning pink and his eyes shimmering in the minimal light. armin turned towards you, 

“would you mind if i kissed you?” armin questioned “no pressure”. you turned away in the good kind of embarrassment, unintentionally smiling.

 “please do”

yayyy lmk what you guys think!! i sincerely hope this isnt toooo gushy and cringy. 

as always feed and water yourself! <33

[jrwi-updates]

Here are all of Grizzly’s chat messages from the JRWI stream earlier!

[Image ID: 

Cropped screenshots of twitch chat messages by grizzlyplays. They read:

grizzlyplays: there are three episodes left of the feywild arc. 

grizzlyplays: HEE HOOOO 

grizzlyplays: HEE HOOO 

grizzlyplays: including this one! 

grizzlyplays: ill add the felipe emote when i get back to desk 

grizzlyplays: thanks for the hype train 🥺

grizzlyplays: i will be listening with you guys tonight and taking notes for editor ikarus 

grizzlyplays: know i am here looking at you 

grizzlyplays: LOOOLL 

grizzlyplays: :D grizzlyplays subscribed with Prime. They've subscribed for 5 months! 

grizzlyplays: WAS THAT SERIOUSLY A FNAF NOISE LOL 

grizzlyplays: DO I TELL HIM TO KEEP IT IN 

grizzlyplays: LMFAOOO OKAY 

grizzlyplays: WHAT 

grizzlyplays: DEJA VU? 

grizzlyplays: writing it down.. 

grizzlyplays: Neivien Oloxidor 

grizzlyplays: keep watching 

grizzlyplays: hee hoo 

grizzlyplays: ;) 

grizzlyplays: "this easy puzzle" 

grizzlyplays: GAS 

grizzlyplays: i can't watch saw i hate those movies sm 

grizzlyplays: THAT NOISE GOES HARD 

grizzlyplays: WOOOAH 

grizzlyplays: @/xubioc yeah!! i'm very disconnected from the recording and the product so when i listen it sounds very new to me LOL. i often say things i dont expect myself to have said 

grizzlyplays: The rolled for EP 79 is already scheduled for Satruday :D 

grizzlyplays: 2chainzz 

grizzlyplays: fun fact: i think i decided to skip another security checkpoint encounter here 

grizzlyplays: for pacing 

grizzlyplays: @/gothicshan i could cosplay william wisp fr 

grizzlyplays: SPIT TAKE 

grizzlyplays: SPIT TAKE W 

grizzlyplays: SPIT TAKE W 

grizzlyplays: W

grizzlyplays: W 

grizzlyplays: W 

grizzlyplays: SPIT TAKE W 

grizzlyplays: SPIT TAKE 

grizzlyplays: jrwishSmug 

grizzlyplays: IF YOU WANT ALL OF MILO 

grizzlyplays: twitch.tv/spittakelive [repeated 11 times]

grizzlyplays: always here for the boys 

grizzlyplays: W 

grizzlyplays: TEARS?? 

grizzlyplays: CRY ABOUT IT 

grizzlyplays: LITTLE BABY 

grizzlyplays: jrwishPretzel 

grizzlyplays: pretzel is in the dark 

grizzlyplays: @/misterkryptonite_ i hate horror games and horror movies LMAOO 

grizzlyplays: i get panic attacks 

grizzlyplays: i could read horror books tho 

grizzlyplays: its ok if i make the scary stuff 

grizzlyplays: our call of cthulu sessions has made me have anixety at night sometimes LOL 

grizzlyplays: drawn BY https://twitter.com/shanuraru [repeated 10 times]

grizzlyplays: @/tellingphibs MY BRAIN!! IT LOOKED DIFFERENT AT FIRST BUT SHAN'S CREATIVE FREEDOM COLLABED WITH MY BRAIN CHILD AND WE MADE THIS 

grizzlyplays: @/angrygay_mushroom ive been trying to slow down and be more relaxed when talking bc in past eps i talk at 1 million miles an hour out of nervousness 

grizzlyplays: OH WAIT!! i got inspired for these designs by watching hunter x hunter 

grizzlyplays: almost forgot 

grizzlyplays: @/tellingphibs up to interpretation 

grizzlyplays: SOB :( 

grizzlyplays: i coulda made him roll acrobatics LOL 

grizzlyplays: why am i nice 

grizzlyplays: ikarus goated for those noises 

grizzlyplays: LMFAOOOO 

grizzlyplays: i was sitting here thinking "what the fuck do i do" 

grizzlyplays: i dont remember what happens im so nervous 

grizzlyplays: we recorded it so long ago 

grizzlyplays: THE GOAAT!! 

grizzlyplays: by himself, power move 

grizzlyplays: oh damn im looking at the camera 

grizzlyplays: terrifying 

grizzlyplays: HEY SO 

grizzlyplays: i might of described Celeste's type of hair/hair style wrong and I apologize if i did. also i named Celeste (the elder) before i named Celestine ( the archfey) and i'm still angy i gave npcs such similar names LOL 

grizzlyplays: heads up 

grizzlyplays: oh okay thats not that bad 

grizzlyplays: jrwishSmug 

grizzlyplays: @/luminoussalt likely because i described her face familiar "like someone you know," however that doesnt automatically mean mother you are right 

grizzlyplays: GILLION W 

grizzlyplays: HUNK OF A MAN??? 

grizzlyplays: he is so inspired by oogway yes 

grizzlyplays: i hope hes not dead and you guys get to meet him later 

grizzlyplays: @/Mintyforshort i havent decided LMAOOO 

grizzlyplays: im crying 

grizzlyplays: jrwishDaddy 

grizzlyplays: HAHAHAHAHAHA 

grizzlyplays: NO TWITTER [repeated 5 times]

grizzlyplays: v 

grizzlyplays: NO TWITTER 

grizzlyplays: jrwishDaddy [repeated 13 times]

grizzlyplays: NEXT WEEK THE FELIPE EMOTE SHOULD BE APPROVED

End ID]  

[music-is-in-our-hearts]

Loss

A lot of people have said I am handling the loss of my dog well and i don’t disagree generally speaking but if I’ve discovered anything I’m also mourning a chapter in my life for it has closed. pretty much 12 months ago my gp and psychiatrist deemed me no longer clinically depressed but if thats so why do i feel so shit all the time? why do i still lean towards the negative? Is it because its been a part of my identity for so long that i seek comfort in it?

I don’t know all i do know is i don’t know how to “be” all i know is to keep on with the mechanical notions of routine. I physically and psychologically feel fragmented. I feel like something foreign is inside of me and i can’t get it out but i simultaneously have this strong urge to just squash my feelings down and divulge into old habits of self destruction. I miss my dog so much it tears at my very existence and i keep thinking the vets going to call me to come pick her up and she’ll be there all fixed up and happy because i came back for her but the reality is my soul mate isnt coming back and that part of my life is gone forever and all i am left with is memories and remnants of her scent and things she loved, that in time will fade.

I remember how excited i was about finally being allowed to get a puppy under the condition that i did my homework and i remember id grab an ink pad and try to use her paw print as a signature to my work. I wrote fictional stories about her for english in highschool and she was there through every heart break, every OD and suicide attempt, everytime my bf decided he didnt want to talk to me for whatever thing i did that he didn’t agree with. she was my pride and joy, she saved lives, she taught me how to see the humour in life again, she taught me forgiveness, compassion and what it meant to be loyal. She was a miracle dog, my fur real seal and aside from the memories i am left with remnants of her existence and although i am happier to have had her in my life for 15 years and not be in pain now.... I just don’t know how to be without her and i find myself getting angry so angry at my mum and idk if its because i envy the fact she is going to see jem again before i do or if her approach to “getting on” after jems passing is pissing me off or maybe i feel angry because she wouldnt get out of the car and pet her one last time as she went under anesthesia. either way I don’t feel like me anymore i feel like fragmented pieces of myself that wont glue back together.

[dasomlimie]

Heyyy! I hope ur doing okay if ur requests r open can l request reader asking if she can see whats under sanzu’s mask like that one scene in naruto where he tried so hard to see kakashi’s mask something similar and funny like that take ur time l love ur work <333

%% BEHIND THAT MASK! #!/

characters : aged up!—Sanzu Haruchiyo

a/n : i cant believe im rewrtiting this sorry if this is half assed tumblr didn't save my draft earlier, enjoy ig

Sanzu Haruchiyo..... your masked bf sometimes you were wondering what behind that mask but ofc you wanted to respect his boundaries and dont want to make him uncomfortable, but curiousity start to eat you alive so you have a little plan in your mind

sometimes there's a lot of idea in your mind on why Sanzu didn't remove his mask, maybe he have big lips that unmatched with his face future? or maybe he have crooked teeth? or even worse he doesn't have mouth! but you scratched the last idea since how did he speak if he doesn't have mouth? his nose? yeah that idea once stuck in your head but you decided to remove it because it doesn't make sense at all

you called Sanzu to meet you up infront of a restaurant which he agreed since maybe you were hungry and he is too, you greet Sanzu before taking his hand and walk into the restaurant with him

"today is my treat" you said smiling he raise an eyebrow you were cheerful more than usual "did something good happen?" he ask you shook his head "nope i just wanted to spend time with my lovely boyfriend" you said he nodded start looking at the menu

"are you ready to order?" he ask after a few minutes you nodded letting him call the waiter, you both said your order as the writer write down your order, you noticed Sanzu's order was a heavy meal he probably going to remove his mask

you smile to yourself before mentally patting yourself for coming up with this idea as soon as your food arrived you stare at Sanzu causing him to raise an eyebrow "whats up my love?" he ask you shook your head "nothing eat up" he nod "you too" you nod

you stare as he was about to remove his mask until your phone start ringing you look at the caller ID noticing it was your boss you look at Sanzu "eat first i have to answer this call" you said he nod as he watch your figure walking out from the restaurant

you listen to your boss rant about how her husband keep cancelling their date and how she think he was cheating on her while you were wondering why the hell your boss telling you all of this as she finally hang up you walk into the restaurant only to be greeted by Sanzu scrolling through his phone you blink

"oh baby! what took you too long? oh and im sorry i finished my food first i haven't eat since yesterday" he said giving you closed eyes smile you nod sitting "did you forgot to eat again?" you ask he nod "im very busy yesterday and just go to sleep as soon as i got home" he said you nod

attempt 1 : failed

"want some?" you ask offering your food he shook his head "im full already" he said you nodded visibly deflated "whats up pretty girl? you were all cheerful a while ago" he said chuckling you shook your head from side to side finding a reason and decided to use your boss phone call as your reason "she did it again" you said he pat your head

"did she start ranting to you again? what was is about?" he ask you sigh "about her husband this and that you know the usual why don't they just divorce?" you said leaning to your chair

"maybe you should find a new job if you were that sick of your boss personal life rant" he said you nodded "yeah i should" you said

the second attempt might make him mad but what is life without a little thrill and spice right? right.

you took a deep breath before apologizing gripping the tray in your hand you walk inside the room smiling at Sanzu you walk toward him then purposely trip yourself

you watch everything happen in slow motion how the juice flew and wetting his mask you cheer silently before your face kiss the floor you groan but being muffled by your carpet Sanzu gasp ignoring his wet clothes and mask

"y/n?! are you okay? oh my why are you suddenly become clumsy?" he ask as he help you to get up you have to swallow your image its not even 6 month into your relationship here you are doing stupid things just to what behind his mask

he hiss when he saw your red forehead with a little bloody lips "we should get that lips treated" he suggest you nodded "let me put this away your hoodie was in my closet along with extra mask" you said silently before walking out from the room leaving a little space for you to peak in

you feel your cheeks heat up as you watch his half naked body you silently cheer as he was about to remove his mask when your doorbell rang causing you to curse silent

you keep debating either to look and discover what behind your boyfriend mask or to answer the door you were deep in thought when Sanzu clear his throat his cheeks tinted with rosy pink just like his hair

"i didn't know you're that type of person" he said clearing his throat again you look up before cursing yourself "oh no you got the wrong idea let me go and answer the door ok?" you said walking a little bit too faster "be careful!" Sanzu called as he look you who almost tripped twice

attempt 2 : failed

you look at Sanzu as you keep following—more like stalking—him you tried to make sure you didn't lost him maybe he would remove his mask at the most random time especially when he's alone? yeah thats what you think ,you were now dressed in all black outfit paired with black cap and black mask

yup much like a stalker

you watch him keep turning and leading you to a dark hallways wondering what he was doing here, little did you know he noticed you following him but didn't have any idea it was his girlfriend

"fuck" you curse silently as you lost him you were about to take another turn when someone pull you to opposite turn you yelped both in suprise and pain when your back make a harsh contact to the cold and dirty wall you hiss from how strong someone's grip on your hands is

"who are you and why are you following me?" he ask you stay silent too scared to answer him, Sanzu chuckle "why are you all silent? acting all scared are we?" he said you shiver under his sharp gaze

"i ask you questions" he said you shut your eyes he sigh annoyed and start to loose his patients then decided to remove both your mask and cap you felt his grip on your hands loosening

"y/n?" he said in softer voice than earlier you still shut your eyes tightly slightly trembling "darling look at me" he said as one of hand slither to your waist while the other cup your cheeks thumb caressing your cheeks "open your eyes my love im not going to hurt you" he said you open your eyes slowly meeting his soften gaze

"why are you following me like that? i thought you were one of those people who tried to get me again" he said chuckling you didn't answer instead hugging him burying your face into his chest

"did i scare you that much?" he ask you shook your head as a no, you were actually embarassed of yourself for doing dumb thing to get him to remove his mask

"then why?" he ask hugging you close to him "im sorry" you said he raise an eyebrow "why?" "im sorry for doing dumb thing lately and following you like earlier" you said he chuckled you look up to him

"i get it now" he said removing you from him gently then cup your cheeks with both of his hands "you know you can just ask right?" you pout "i just dont want to make you feel uncomfortable" he shook his head

"you will never im actually waiting for you to ask me by yourself" he said you nodded "then can i uh you know" he nod letting you remove his mask

heart beating loudly Sanzu was prepared from any insult from you yet nothing came our from your mouth, does he freak you out? he was about to apologize when you whispered out a very unexpected word he expects you to say

"beautiful" you said he froze not believing what he just heard "what?" he ask for confirmation "i said beautiful" you repeat before caressing his scars with both of your thumb he sigh in relief

"really? i thought you were going to freaked out" he said you shook your head with confused face while your attention was still on his face "why would i?" you ask

"people always told me its disgusting i thought you would too but apparently not im relieved" you heart broke a little from his words "who the hell said your scars is disgusting?! let me beat them up" you said with determination he shook his head "its okay you were an absolute angel i cant imagine you beating people up" he said pressing a kiss on your forehead

"you look hotter without mask" you whisper he smile "is that so?" he ask you nodded then cover his face with his mask "and only me can see you my beautiful and handsome and hot boyfriend without his mask no one can see your full face they would fall for you" you said he chuckled before ruffling your hair

"whatever you say angel" he said you smile as he lead you out from the hallway just so your know he would use your silly attempt to tease you in the future

attempt 3 : successfully failed

!%! © HNEULWH— i did not allow my work to be used or adapted in any form without my permission !#//

[wqk-k]

Obey Me Brother react to an idol!MC

 hi this is my first set of headcanons for the brothers  👉👈 i apologize if the brothers are ooc in this, though i tried my best jksajdufhj. i hope you enjoy!

++++

Warning(s): Cursing

Reader Pronouns: They/Them (4A)

Background: MC is a very popular idol in their world, best known for their impressive singing skills, music and the amount of rewards they have recieved because of their talents. Surprisingly, they aren’t only popular in their world, but in the Devildom and Celestial Realm as well.

++++

Lucifer

since lucifer didnt actually read who you were on the paper that had blown to his feet, he had no idea you were an idol at first

but after couple days at RAD, he noticed that random demons kept coming up to you in between classes and didnt leave until the next class started

most of them had come up to you with a pen and some paper asking for your autograph

he was just like ??? 

after a while of this happening luci decided to just ask you straight up why they were coming up to you like that and you had told him you were an idol back in the human realm

that explains it

he honestly doesnt mind

if people start hating on you in public, he’ll honestly just shoot them a death glare and it works

so damn well

he got too much pride to deal with those underlings

if you start working on music/mv projects that you left off on in the human realm (like shooting mv or singing) he will absolutely rent you a recording booth or fuck, even a whole ass theatre if you needed it

sometimes he likes to sit in the recording booth and listen to you sing for a bit before returning to his stacks of mammon’s bills 

v proud of you dont get him wrong

but he will make sure you’ve done all your homework first LMAO 🛌

Mammon

when mammon first found out you were an idol he started digging through boxes that had been in his closet

after what seemed like hours he finally found the box he was looking for and he started to dig through it

he pulled out an old camera that levi gave him a couple hundred years ago bc he said he didnt need it

mammon had the best idea ever, he could sell pictures of you to your fans for at least 10,000 grimm each.

surprisingly it worked

like really well

so well that you found out

you confronted him about it, saying that you find hella uncomfy with him snapping pictures of you at random times. not only that but it was an invasion of your privacy

despite him earning so much grimm, he agrees to stop but keeps some of the pictures to himself to look at when he misses you 

if you get hate in public he’ll turn into his demon form and scare the person away, maybe scaring you in the procees but apologizes right away if he does

if you start working on music/mv projects he’ll offer to help you shoot mvs or record you singing if you need the help

just make sure he gets some credit for helping you

but he genuinely thinks you look amazing in anything, like anything

you could be wearing a big bird cosplay and he’ll think you look breathtaking

gets you to model w him sometimes

Leviathan

wait you look really familiar

really really familiar

you almost look and sound like that one really popular human idol that hes simped for time and time again

wait

oh shit

v embarrassed when he finds out it is actually you and gets really nervous when hes talking to you

is the demon asking for your autograph

but you have no idea how much power you have over this man

you could tell him to come out of his room and he’d come out with ease, no protesting, no nothing

may ask you to record a ringtone for him for when he wakes up

even after months of you two knowing each other, he still gets flustered when you start talking to him with your stupid cute ass eyes and your perfect hair and your perfect voice and your perfect-

yeah you get the point AKJSDKLASFBG

if you get hate in public he will deadass growl at the person before escorting you to your favorite ice cream place

if you start working on music/mv projects he will be by your side 24/7

he wants to see the god/ess themselves at work

hes like your personal butler for the time youre working on the projects and its adorable

hes bby

Satan

when he finds out youre an idol he will 100% voulenteer to help you write lyrics for your next song

but besides that, like luci, he really doesnt mind

he hears some other demons talking shit about you after art class and he’ll be angy as usual, but after stomping off and accidentally bumping into you he just

turned into puddy??

idk what it was but it was something abt they way your hair was a lil messed up and looking at him like that wish a small embarrassed look

just wow

every ounce of anger just evaporated while you apologized over and over again because the face he was making made him look like he was angry for some reason 

when he snaps back into reality he says its cool but then asks if youd like to go to the library w him because honestly youre his safe haven now

sometimes he asks you to hum a tune for him when hes reading

if the demons start hating again, you may need to hold him back KJASNDJFG 

if you start working on music/mv projects, again, will voulenteer for helping with lyrics

if you already have the lyrics down he’ll review them and give constructive critisisim if needed

or he’ll just write every lyric himself and you can judge it after hes done

Asmodeus

is not surprised at all

hes actually heard some of your songs and damn id he doesnt have them on his “on repeat” playlist on devilfy

he thinks you have an outstanding voice, not only that but youre a gorgeous lookin thing

asmo likes to hit on you a lot because he likes to see that flustered look on your face but he would never over your boundaries

he wouldnt want to be over the internet bc he made one of the most praised artists in devildom (thats not even a demon) angry

asmo doesnt want to be cancelled yet JKSJKDGFUA

but seriously, he thinks youre amazing

like really amazing

there like no lust involved in his admiration for you he just geniunely thinks youre cool

but he does think you look amazing 24/7

will ask you to model things for him for devilgram

if you get hate in public, he’ll hold your hands and shower you with compliments and tells you to ignore them

if you start working on music/mv project he will insist on doing backup vocals or being a backup dancer

or like the head backup dancer or whatever theyre called

is like your personal stylist wherever you go as well

along with that he can also help you come up with a beat for your song if you need one, he is more than happy to help someone like you

Beelzebub

he honestly thinks youre really cool

asmo showed him one of your songs before and thought it sounded really catchy

not only that, you sounded beautiful, almost like you were actually from the celestial realm, consider him a fan

so when you showed up for the new exchange program he was surprised but got really giddy

was one of the demons who asked for your autograph

you gave him a sweet smile after he asked and he just- melted

man down man down

will want to spend lost of time with you and take you to ristorante six on fridays as his treat

you usually end up paying though which he feels really guilty about but you tell him its fine

youre an idol who is loaded to the chest, youve got nothing to lose KLSKADJHF

if you get hate in public he’s also the type to death glare but people dont really hate on you in public when youre w him bc he has a naturally scary aura

lowkey thought you wouldnt like him at first :(

if you start working on mv/music projects he’ll start cooking you meal and making sure you get enough water

will absolutely cook your favorite meal- or any meal in fact- if you request it

if you dont request anything he’ll just wing it and make something he think you’ll like kjskdhsf

Belphegor

couldnt care less  🧍

he thinks your voice is pretty nice tho

hears beel listening to your music once and agrees w him on you having a really nice voice

lowkey sing him to sleep

like its super cute

plus he thinks youre gorgeous?? like wow you rlly pretty

once tried rubbing your face bc he thought you were wearing makeup but when nothing came up on his thumb he muttered a small “wow” and hugged you

it was the cutest thing ever ohmy god KJSJDSIF

ever since that day hes obtained a habit of rubbing your face when he finds you stunning or at random moments

if you get hate in public he will literally murder the person?? but in like an alleyway or something

he’ll say something like “wait here” and walks toward a dark area to do his thang

when he comes back he’s covered in this red shit and you worry for him but he just glosses over it and takes you into a pillow shop LMAO

he is v protective over you

if you start working on mv/music projects he’ll occasionally help out but most of the time he’s sleeping so he doesnt really care 

sometimes he’ll give beat/lyric suggestions or help flim the mv but thats it  🧍  

++++

[insufferablelust]

Hi, I hope you're having a great day! I was wondering if you could write something for Hotch where the reader is one of the younger members and he always wants to protect her. She messes up on a case and Strauss yells at her and she ends up crying and Hotch takes care of her. Thank you so much, and it is okay if you don't want to write it!

Hi! i’m so sorry it took me awhile to write your piece but i hope this is worth it! and i also changed it a bit so i hope you don’t mind, but if you have any specific ideas just let me know! anyways thank you so much for requesting and waiting! much love!

This is an Aaron Hotchner x SA!Reader Blurb.

Warnings : Fluffs, angst, Mean!Strauss, Hotch is like your caregiver in a professional way like he guides you through the cases and help you etc because you’re new and young, Mention of Guns, Blood, Supportive!BAU, Mental disorder, and Abductions.

this blurb also have a special meaning to me since i’m diagnosed with the same Disorder the unsub has in this so i’m sorry if the descriptions are a bit too detailed. i still hope you like it and give me feedbacks or constructive criticisms thank you for reading❤️

———————

Being the youngest in every field has its own disadvantages, when you were at school, being the youngest would get you picked at, but you shut them up quickly with your bravery. When you were in college, most people doubted you even your professors, but you also managed to make them stare in awe when you became the top student of your criminal psychology class. When you were training in the academy, many underestimate you, but again— you came out on top, trainee with the highest score amongst others. So you never thought about being the youngest much,

No, not until you actually work— by work i mean becoming a part of BAU, Special Agent Y/n Y/l/n. It was easy at first, you received such a warm welcome from your new teammates that you already thought that this is going to be easy enough. The first time you met them were at the bullpen, they were all lounging and talking about a recent case as you stepped in nervously yet you put a stern smile. The first person who approached you was the wonderful Miss Penelope Garcia, who happens to be your friend, and then you shook hands with David Rossi, Jennifer Jareau, Aaron Hotchner, Dr. Spencer Reid, Emily Prentiss, and got a flirty remark from none other than Derek Morgan— who you scoffed at and said “not going to work on me pal, Garcia has told me aaaall about it” which drew laughter.

Your assignments were quite easy at first, you were always the one to be confident, top of your class and all— so on your first day you got your first assignment with the team, a case in Virginia. You were told to follow Agent Hotchner, and you have to be honest that it couldn’t be any more easier for you. He showed you the ropes, how to analyze certain behaviors, even let you interview the family alone. He made you feel safe and comfortable to do this job, and you couldn’t be more grateful.

Now that you’ve gotten to several cases, you’ve felt like you earned your place here, not just as the new girl, but a profiler, an agent, and you couldn’t be more prouder— and you can’t help but to thank Aaron for it, he always guides you through all the horrible things that you just feel content to work on cases with him. Your teammates joked about it sometimes, saying how close you two have gotten, they noticed how Hotch never raised his voice with you, not once, it’s either you’re that good or as Prentiss likes to call it “He has a soft spot for you (Y/n)”

But not all paths are smooth paths, it was sunday afternoon, you were lounging with Emily, Garcia, and Sergio when you heard the call coming from Garcia’s phone. Upon seeing “HOTCHER” as the called id, you and Prentiss sigh deeply before preparing your go bag not even bothering for Garcia to finish the phone call.

Turns out it was a child abduction case, and the first thing to note about this is that time is of the essence and every second counts. The first abduction started in Virginia a month ago, where it was handled by the local police— but then the same type of M.O and Victimology appeared in some abduction cases all over the country, the most recent one is Los Angeles. So off to LA you goes with the team, only thing different this time is that JJ and Hotch was staying behind to talk to the police in Virginia—it’s your first ever case without his guidance and you haven’t decided if you like it or hate it.

———————————

12 hours into the abduction, and Y/n has messed up bad, bad enough that it put her own life in jeopardy. Y/n had gone to follow a lead, that she received from the hotline tip, she debated at first.. on telling the others about the call she received, all her training would told her to tell someone, you can’t go alone but the caller insist that you go alone. Something about this man is not right, you can feel it in your guts. But you know that if you were about to tell the others- they wouldn’t let you pursue, not because you’re incapable but because its not right to go alone, but you took the risk to save these children— the caller did mentioned you only have 10 minutes to drive to his address and if you don’t show up alone, the children will be killed— and you can’t let that happen. So you told the tip responder that you have told your team and that you’re under pursue before sprinting out of the LAPD.

When the team realized that Y/n was gone, it was an hour after she actually left. The second they found out about her whereabouts, they rushed to the location— already hoping that you and the kids are still alive. To their relief, you were found alive, but you were tied to a chair, face bloodied and its clear that you took some harsh beating. The unsub was holding one of the child, threatening to kill him.

He was a man who has Abandonment issues with severe borderline personality disorder, the reason why he abducts children is because he hated his childhood— he hated himself for being a fuck up, so he took the perfect children according to his judgment and kept them— it’s masochistic, he kept them as a reminder for himself of how worthless he is.

“Put the gun down, and let the boy go” Morgan’s voice rang through the abandoned building, causing the unsub to panic and move backwards “No! stay there! c-come any closer and i’ll blow his perfect fucking face off” He snarled, before you gained all the energy you have left and speak up,

“Adam, let him go please. I know how you feel, and let me show you that you are none of those things your mind is telling you. You’re not worthless and you deserve to be loved, a- a mother’s love.. don’t you missed it? Come here, i- i can give it to you” You coughed up blood as your vision gets blurry, The team gasped as the unsub let the boy go.. all of them and kneeled next to you, gun still in hand as he untied you, then lay his head on your thighs. Your fingers shakily move, to ran through his hair, and inching to get the gun from here.

“Shh, shh Mama’s here, give me the toy.. I’ll let you play w-with it later” You said holding back the tears as he slowly handed you the loaded gun before you tossed it and the team cuffed him.

You cried hard as you fell to your knees on the floor, the last thing you heard was Prentiss’s voice calling for medic and then you black out.

——————-

Its been a few days after the incident, you’re on your way back to Quantico. Some of the bruisings are gone but there are some scars that will be there forever, and honestly you don’t worry about it all— the only thing you worry about is what your superior is going to do with you. You knew you messed up bad and it doesn’t matter that you are the reason that those kids are free, you should’ve told your team. When Emily asked you why, you said it’s just gut feeling em. And when Spencer asked you how’d you know?

you told him, that The unsub told you about his young mother, the same exact age as your age, your hair color, and around your height. Thats why he wanted you to come, and the pieces clicked, All of the hesitancy to kill, He liked the pain, not inflicting it to others if not necessary but to himself. That’s how you know. Your answer seemed to please the young doctor as he smiled and whispered a small “Great job, Agent.”

All of them were understanding on why you did it, except Morgan because he’s like your big brother but he did said something along the lines of “You’re a damn good profiler but you’re still stupid” but the worst had to come from your superior; Erin Strauss.

As soon as you landed in Quantico, Hotch was there waiting for you, then escort you to his room, where Strauss was there also. You were nervous not because you’re wrong but because you knew you could’ve done better and it’s against the regulations.

Hotch had said to you during a phone call that he “understands why you did what you did but it certainly doesnt justify it.” The way he spoke those words calmed you down up until now.. standing in front of Strauss herself.

“Agent Y/n, sit down.” You sat down in front of her with Hotch leaning against his desk, you put on a smile as you keep eye contact with her, “How are you feeling?”

“I’m feeling fine, Ma’am. Thank you for asking—i’ve completed the psych evals too and-“

“What you did was reckless and stupid, Agent. You put your own life in danger as well as your teammates. You let your own ambition to lead you into this mess—“

Taken aback at her words, you quickly replied, “Excuse me Ma’am, with all due respect i never have any intention other than saving the boys from the unsub. So i don’t understand how my ‘ambition’ led me.”

“Agent, you will not interrupt me. Must i remind you that you’re an intelligent, bright, and exceptionally young with a lot of great potentials but let me ask you this, Are you too immature that your ambition on becoming the one who caught the unsub is your top priority? The Director agreed that maybe you should take another year of training to successfully complete mature so you dont make mistakes like this.” and at that your eyes brimmed with tears, How could she? how could she compared your age to how you do your job? You were trying to save the kids and you did. Your age has no connection to any of this and certainly not to your abilities. You were about to say something when Hotch stand and put a finger up signaling you to hold it.

“Ma’am I know what Y/n did is incredibly reckless but she only did that because the unsub specifically asked for her— she reminded him of his young mother, their features are the same. Agent Y/n, does know the regulations and protocols, and she knows that if she tells anyone the risk of those boys dying is greater than any other. So with all due respect Ma’am, As her direct superior in this case, i’m asking you to back up and let me handle her penalty according to my professional judgment as someone who has seen her incredible work and sacrifices.” His voice is loud, ringing on your ears like you’re the only thing that mattered. It left you speechless as he give you the tissue box and then waiting for Erin’s reply.

To your surprise she didn’t say anything before leaving his office. You broke down once again, gasping for air as you feel the pain now, the ache on your shoulder and wrists, the dull pain on your face, the cuts and bruises on your stomach. You are exhausted, and It seemed that Hotch knows it too.

He sit besides you as he gently placed your head on his shoulder, so you can cry with a shoulder to support you. You were so exhausted, that you dont even care if this is breaking any rules or protocols. You just want to save people, you just want to be with your team.

“She won’t do anything, I promise you that ill protect and guides you, so hang onto my words.” He said, rubbing the back of your neck and shoulders as you let out tiny gasps, trying to form a sentence.

“T-thank- y-you, Aaron.” is the only thing you managed to speak before the exhaustion wipes you out, the last thing you heard was his voice, “Anytime Y/n, Sleep well.”

——————

Feel free to send me blurb ideas! give this a like and reblog, thank you!

[threecrowsinatrenchcoat]

Paint My Spirit Gold

Dukeceit Week Day 2: Green/Yellow

Fans of the YouTubers "Deceit" and Remus "The Duke" Sanders start to suspect that maybe, just maybe, the two of them are more than simple internet pals.

AO3 Link: [here]

Word Count: 2187

Warnings: n/a

@dukeceitweek <3

-

[ID: A screenshot of a Twitter post by user @CallMeDukie. It features a watercolor-style painting of a snake. The snake appears to be made of melting chocolate, and there is a large bite taken out of its tail. Cherries and jam are leaking out of the snake at the bite wound. The snake's expression of horror is overly-exaggerated to the point of comedy. The caption reads: "liked your snake boi, @SerpenThyme. thanks for the inspo." /end ID]

- 

A notification ding cut Janus off mid-sentence. 

“Wow, someone left their cell phone on, so professional,” he said, giving the camera a dramatic eye roll. That someone was him, of course, because he was the only one in the apartment- just him and the running livestream- but that was no excuse not to be a drama queen about it. He finished wiping flour off his hands and grabbed his phone to silence it; but the notification made him pause. He flicked his eyes up toward the camera and gave a slight smirk.

“My goodness, I’m famous,” he drawled. “The Duke himself has graced little old me with some fan art.”

Most of the comments in the chat wanted him to show it, so Janus opened up Twitter to see the full post he’d been tagged in. It was a watercolor painting of the coiled-snake chocolate sculpture- lovingly named Jake by his viewers- he’d made for his YouTube video last week; it was wearing an expression of such comedic horror that Janus had to stifle a laugh. He flicked his phone screen toward the close-up camera on his counter so his viewers could see.

“How kind of you, Remus,” he said. “All of you should go scold him for what he’s done to poor Jake here.”

Most of his viewers would know he was joking- after all, they were the ones to nickname him Deceit when he provided neither a real or fake name for his online persona. They knew full well what he was like by now.

The oven timer dinged. Janus silenced his phone and set it aside.

“And our first batch of cookies is done. You know, why don’t we show the Duke some appreciation?”

-

[ID: An Instagram post by user @SerpenThyme. The photo is an artistically-framed shot of a stack of sugar cookies with green, yellow, and pink icing. Propped up against the stack is another cookie, with an intricate icing-drawing of an octopus. The photo appears to have been color corrected to have high contrast, low saturation, and a dark vignette at the edges. The Instagram user @OctoDukie is tagged. No caption. /end ID]

- 

“You know, I have often been accused of actually being a little old lady, what with my fondness for knitted jumpers, rocking chairs, and incredibly fucked up murder mystery books. Today I am doing nothing to dispel this accusation, by making soup.”

The studio was dark and empty aside from Remus' workspace. Everyone else had left long ago, even his own brother, which meant that it was officially ass-o'clock in the morning (or, as most people called it, somewhere between 1 and 2 a.m.) But Remus was stuck in hyperfocus, honed in on putting the last touches on a commission that he'd been putting off for weeks. It's not that it was a tough painting- once he'd gotten started, it was actually a very creatively satisfying piece- but man, executive dysfunction could go suck a dick

“French onion soup, specifically. Because while I do like to pretend I am a classy bitch, I am also, regrettably, a lazy bitch with a distaste for anything that takes longer than one bottle of wine to make.”

Remus hated working in silence. It was stifling, almost suffocating. His brain needed noise like his lungs needed air. So when the studio had grown still and silent, Remus had flipped open his laptop and queued up some YouTube videos. 

“So we have here three pounds of onions that we need to slice up, pole to pole. You’re going to cry no matter what, so if you have any memories you’ve been repressing since middle school, now is an excellent time to dredge those up.” 

And if it happened to be 90% SerpenThyme videos, well. Sue him. 

“Now the first rule of caramelizing onions: fast and sloppy is always better than slow and thorough… at least, that’s what every man I’ve ever slept with tells me.”

Remus choked and glanced over to his laptop screen just in time to catch Deceit's trademark smirk directed at the audience just for a moment. It was the deadpan delivery that always got him. Remus could barely hold onto a joke long enough to get through it without cackling mid-punchline, but this fucker could say the funniest shit like an off-hand comment. 

He wiped his hands off on his jeans (what use were clothes if you couldn't use them as paint rags?) and pulled his laptop across the table.  He typed out a quick comment, citing the timestamp of the joke, and after it was posted, he shut his laptop. 

'Cause ass-o'clock was short for "get-your-ass-home-or-I’ll-kick-it" o'clock. 

-

[ID: A screenshot of a YouTube comments section. The first comment is by user TheDuke, and reads: "10:42 wow, rude." The second comment is a reply by user SerpenThyme, and simply reads ";)" /end ID]

-

Janus plopped down on the couch with a slight groan. He didn’t need to stream today, but he really hated missing days. Besides… he was fine. Really. 

He adjusted the camera until he was happy with the framing, and then checked the settings on his streaming software. Satisfied, he started the stream, and watched as his usual viewers rolled in. 

“What do you mean I’m not in my kitchen?” Janus drawled, addressing the chat. He glanced around with an expression of faux-shock on his face. “My goodness, when did that happen?”

He chuckled, and then gestured to his surroundings. “Yes, we are in my living room today. If you must know, my closest and most trusted friend tried to murder me today- yes, Virgil, it was attempted murder and nothing less- and I survived with nary a scratch… and a broken foot, but that is beside the point. Anyway, I’m not allowed to stand for long periods of time, and I may or may not be somewhat inebriated by pain pills and couldn’t stand even if I wanted to. So we are cooking from my couch today.”

Janus paused for a few moments to read the chat messages as they popped up. A few get well soon’s, a few theories about the “attempted murder,” Virgil- who moderated his chat for him- vehemently denying the “attempted murder” but otherwise refusing to clarify the event, and a large volume of wtf why are you streaming today, take care of yourself comments, which made him smile. But one particular comment caught his eye, almost lost amid the torrent of an active chat: wait this kinda looks like the Duke’s living room?

“Oh, VampSuga,” he said, addressing that commenter in particular with a slight smirk. “I haven’t the faintest idea what you’re talking about. Anyway, since I can’t reach my oven from here, I thought some no-bake cookies were in order. For these you will need-”

-

[ID: A screenshot of a Discord conversation. The text reads:

“VampSuga: Ok ok hear me out. Dukeceit. 

Starstruck96: who?

IneffableSnek: lmao

FeralBeauYasha: lol

VampSuga: Deceit and Remus Sanders! They’re totally dating. I will die on this hill. 

FeralBeauYasha: Isn’t the duke w/ PatPat?

IneffableSnek: no thats his brothers bf

FeralBeauYasha: ohh

VampSuga: Did anyone see Deceit’s stream today? I swear that’s the Duke’s livingroom. 

StarStruck96: idk that seems like a stretch

IneffableSnek: no wait i kno what u mean

IneffableSnek: im watching the duke’s old videos and that one where he shows off all his old weapons he’s in a living room kinda like deceit’s 

FeralBeauYasha: They were acting all cute on twitter too

VampSuga: DUKECEIT”  /end ID]

-

"Hey guys, been a while since you've seen my face and not just whatever my hands are busy with, when it's within YouTube's terms and conditions I mean. They used to be way more lenient…" Remus trailed off for a moment, then shook his head sharply and plastered on a grin. 

"Anyway! In June me and a few other creators did a fundraiser for the Trevor Project, and y'all smashed the goal, so I let you decide what video I'd make this month." He paused, and gestured to the mountain of clothes piled behind him on the bed. "And you had so many juicy ideas to choose from, but you decided to dress me up like a Barbie instead."

Remus paused to scroll through his phone for a few moments. "Ah, ok, here we go. Twitter user YoonIsMyCat- oh, BTS, nice- sent in this first outfit. Uh… future Remus, put up the post here somewhere." He gestured vaguely to his right. "Y'all went with either a fuckton more clothes or a fuckton less clothes, which I respect. Apparently this outfit is called…” He squinted at his phone. “Amish chic? I take it back, no respect at all.”

Remus cycled through the outfits his viewers sent in, which ranged from the aforementioned “Amish chic” to “2008 rave attire” to “ok now you guys are just fucking with me” (which consisted of one of those big puffy snow coats, lime green in color; booty shorts with the shrug text emoji across the ass; fuzzy pink boots; and a yellow cowboy hat to top off the whole thing. It was awful. Remus loved it.) The mountain of clothes on the bed gradually became a mess of clothes spread across the floor instead, until there was just one outfit left. 

“Ok so Twitter user VampSuga sent me this outfit that I’m gonna call ‘sexy librarian.’ I couldn’t find this exact sweater online, but-” he paused for dramatic effect, before brandishing a sweater toward the camera like a bullfighter. “My boyfriend had something that was close enough.”

Remus hopped up from the bed and switched off the camera so he could change.

“They’re going to lose their minds,” a voice drawled from the doorway. Remus threw his shirt at him.

“Shoo, I’m getting naked.”

-

[ID: A Twitter post by user @CallMeDukie. It features a selfie of YouTuber Remus “The Duke” Sanders, a Hispanic man with his hair dyed green and styled into a spiked mohawk. He is wearing a yellow knitted cardigan over a black button-up shirt. He is grinning widely at the camera. The caption reads: “my viewers pick my outfits! now live on youtube. go see what i look like as a sexy librarian!” /end ID]

-

DukeceitStan

first and only dukeceit shipper ig

DukeceitStan

wow there’s so many of you now! Hi!!

DukeceitStan

i want this to be canon so bad omg

DukeceitStan

i mean just look

[image]

how 

[image]

cute

[image]

[ID: A series of three gifs featuring Youtubers SerpenThyme, aka Deceit, and TheDuke, aka Remus Sanders. Deceit is a black man with long, dreadlocked hair, and vitiligo patches along the left side of his face. Remus is a Hispanic man with green-dyed hair styled into a mohawk, many ear and facial piercings, and tattoos covering both arms. Each gif is edited so that the highlights are tinged yellow when Deceit is seen, and tinged green when Remus is seen.

The first gif depicts a close-up shot of Deceit’s hands as he carefully decorates a cookie with green and yellow icing. The cookie art he is working on appears to be a half-finished octopus. The gif then fades into a mid-shot of Remus, with his back to the camera, facing a canvas. The canvas is blank, and Remus appears to be laying out paints on a table to his left. 

The second gif depicts Deceit seated at his couch, facing the camera. He has many ingredients spread across his coffee table (including oats, cocoa powder, and butter) and appears to be in the process of laying out several more. The gif fades to show Remus seated at a similar couch with a similar coffee table in front of him. The camera is angled slightly downward to better show the myriad of knives spread out across the table. Remus is gesturing wildly with a morning star held in his hand. 

The third gif depicts Deceit in his kitchen. He is pulling on a bright, yellow knitted cardigan, and smirking toward the camera. The gif fades to show Remus in his bedroom, seated on his bed. He is holding up a similar-looking cardigan toward the camera and grinning. /end ID]

- 

“Remus, it’s almost two in the morning. Come to bed.”

“I’m coming, sorry. Twitter distracted me.”

“Mm. I can’t believe the bird app is more distracting than I am.”

“You should try harder.”

“Come to bed and maybe I will.”

“Ok, ok, I’m coming. Hang on though, is it cool if I post this?”

“Sure. They figured it out anyway.”

“Sweet. Ok, Jannie, I’m coming.”

-

[ID: A screenshot of a Twitter post by user @CallMeDukie. It reads: “Dukeceit is canon.” /end ID] 

[marauder-exe]

Sick of it- Aaron Hotchner x Reader

Request: I’m not sure if you’re taking requests rn...but I would love to see a fic with hotch where maybe he has feelings for the reader who’s in her 20s and she gets injured on the job, leaving her deaf. She’s able to continue working with the BAU but can’t do any extensive field work. She just gets sick of everybody questioning her capability of doing her job.   Sorry if that’s too much lol 🤷🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ Word Count: 1.1k

Warnings: bomb explosion, loss of hearing, angsty but happy ending kinda.

A/N: Welcome back to: Reid loves cliffhangers (in actuality she can just never finish fics)

“Hotch I've told you I'm fine, We got everyone, we detonated all the bombs. Morgan and I are doing a last clearing of the scene, then we’ll be on our way back” You spoke into the phone while continuing to search the area. “Okay, I just-” He hesitated. He couldn't let you know about his feelings. “Your one of the greatest agents this team has ever had, we need you.” He decided to say instead. He always covered his feelings with business. He sighed on the other end of the phone. “Thank you, Aaron” He could've sworn his heart skipped a beat every time you called him Aaron. “i am fine though I prom-” Your words were soon cut short when an ear-splitting explosion echoed through the receiver, quickly followed by a scream of your name from Morgan. His heart dropped. There was a deathly silence. “(Y/N)! Morgan! Whats going on?” His heart clenched at the thought of anything happening to you. He had gained feelings for you around year ago. You had been transferred from Interpol, and quickly proved to the team that you where everything you got cracked up to be. The day he realised it, he felt so guilty. You were 24, he had feelings for a 24 year old. You where old enough to be his daughter. He couldn't do that to Hailey. He tried to repress his feelings. Push so much stuff down on top of them, so he couldn't feel them any more. It never worked though. He turned around to the startled faces of his team, confused by his shout. “Hotch? Whats wrong?” JJ asked, taking in his pale face. “Its-Its (Y/N). i-i heard an explosion and then Morgan shouting her name and then-and then nothing” He dropped the phone he was holding, as if the shock had just knocked him back into action. He ran from the small police room that the team had set up into his jeep. Turning it on, ignoring the shouts of his team, he sped off down the street. “JJ, update the sheriff, me and Reid will go after him” Emily said, loading into her jeep.

The wait was horrendous. It was perhaps the longest wait of his life. Or at least it felt like it. He sat in the uncomfortable hospital chairs, his knee bouncing rhythmically. He was surrounded by the team, it was clear him and Morgan were the most affected though. Morgan having been there when the bomb went off. He thought about everything. The time you shared together. All the days off that were sent together. The laughs that were shared. The tears that were shed. He thought of it all. He also thought about how he didn't tell you. Didn't admit his feelings for you. And no you might die thinking that no one loves you. It was bitter torture, watching the doctors walk in and out of the waiting room, none of them for you. Until finally, a young male doctor approached the team. “uh, Mr Hotchner?” He asked towards him. His head shot up as he immediately walked over to the doctor. “Thats me” “Shes stable. But she did suffer extensive injuries, im aware the bomb was directly next to her?” He nodded. “Shes lucky she survived, but he did. There wont be much permanent damage. Although we don't know to what extent, we imagine she suffered massive hearing loss. We've assessed her and right now she cannot hear anything, she's completely deaf. We don't know if that will improve in the future” The young man informed Hotch. His stomach dropped. He couldn't believe he let this happen. It was all his fault. He let you go. He didn't even come with you to the scene. He could've stopped it. He completely derailed your life. You where 24. You had so much more that you could do. “You can visit her now, she's lucid so she should be fine” The team sprang up to go to your room. They carefully entered the room, hoping not to startle you, Although you already looked panicked. They assumed the doctor told you about your condition. Your head perked up when you saw your team coming through the door. Tears still streamed down your face as Hotch rushed over to you. “Hotch-Hotch, im deaf, im not- im not gonna be able to my job i-” You sobbed as he cradled your face into his hands. He knew you knew sign language but he didn't. He looked around as his teams sad faces. Prentiss looked at him. “I- I know sign language” Emily stepped forward next to your bed, and began explaining everything.

“I can do my job Hotch! Just because I cant hear any more doesn't mean im less able than anyone else out there” You snapped, gesturing to the room full of profilers. It had been a hard 6 months. You had recovered perfectly well, you hearing, not as much. You weren't aloud to do field work any more. You were constantly stuck doing paperwork, or in some stuffy police room. An ignorant comment from a police officer on your recent case had caused you to snap. “i know you can” He tried. Since the explosion, you had mastered lip reading, as well as gotten a hearing aid, as it was more convenient. “So why! Why has everyone been baby-ing me for the past months? Im so sick of everyone, even people I don't know, treating me like im unable to do the job Ive been working for my entire life! Im sick of it” You burst out, glad for the soundproof room. “No one is babying you” He returned. You scoffed and raised your eyebrows. “no ones been babying me? Okay. Dont act stupid Hotch. You see the way everyone acts around me. Constantly stepping on eggshells. I may of lost my hearing but I still have my profiling skills. Even you Big bad boss Hotchner has gone soft, something I never thought id see” “I haven't gone soft” He insisted. He had gone soft. Well he had always been soft for you, but now he showed it. “No? So whats all of it for? The driving me home, checking my place everyday, bringing me take out, making me dinner, bringing Jack around more often, Whats that for then?” You threw your arms around angrily. He was gonna say it. He couldn't stop it. “Its because I love you! I recognised you need help, now I finally have an excuse to do everything ive wanted to do for the last year.” He snapped back. He couldn't believe he had just said that. And by the look on your face, you couldn't believe it either. “What?” You whispered, heart race speeding up.

[randomsevans]

maid to be part 3

Ransom made his way back to his family with a small smile due to you being on your mind . He slipped into the living room , where his family were waiting for him . The food long forgotten and not eaten  in the room next door .As most of the family were stood up with a glass of what ever drink was going around . 

Ransom didn't want to hear the pathetic whines from his mother nor his uncle . So he made his way over to the corner , where he spotted his younger cousins Jacob and Megan . Yes he hated his family , but his cousins was the most bearable .With Megan hating the family just as much as him , and well Jacob just sits their quietly on his phone ... so Ransom never really fought with him , Apart from this one time when Jacob made his way upstairs and almost caught you and Ransom . But Ransom played it off by shouting at both you and Jacob in his cruel dickhead way .But of course you didn't take it to heart , it wasn't the first nor the last time  he acted that way to you with his family around . 

Ransom sighted , straightening his blue knitted sweater before sitting down on the oversized ,chair , that was so unconformable . He moved around on the seat , eventually getting some what comfortable places his armed on each side , bring one of his fist to lean against 

“is she okay ?” Megan looked up  from her college book for a second to Ransom , only to go back to it 

“huh !” Ransom responded , tired from his family already , he had some much on his mind , and you were at the front of it as always , as well as the pressure he already feels from soon to be a father . 

“Y/N is she okay ?” Megan asked once again closing her book , Megan made it her job to know all the helps names , she didnt like having other on her beck and call , and calling them “the help “ 

Ransom decided to play dumb and show off his arsehole personal “who ? the maid “ 

Megan glared at him in annoyance “you know their have names right Hugh , not just maids or the help “

Ransom just simple shrugged his shoulders “oh well “

“why did you even help her , she only hurt her self a little i dont see you do that with anyone ?” she narrowed her eyes at him , it caught the attention  of Jacob bring his head from his phone looking from one cousin to the other 

“oh well you know me Meg i see something pretty , i wanted it and i take it “ he let out a little  dry chuckle “its amazing how a girl can open up to you if you show them a little bit of kindest “ Ransom smug smile played  happily on his face . 

Megan looked at him in disgust and her face scrunched up , while Jacob snicked at his older cousin “your disgusting Hugh , she would never go any where near you , she actual has self respect you know !”

Ransom chuckled at his self , if only she knew , if only all his family knew , That you were indeed already his , and he is your ever since he wanted you , he couldn't get enough , he never looked at another girl since , and that was well a year ago . But Megan was right you do have self respect which is why you wanted nothing to do with Ransom at first , but after months , And Ransom means MONTHS , 4 long ones , you finally agreed to allow him to take you on a simple date . You didn't wanted anything fancy or expensive . So you and Ransom spent your first of many dates at a park , just simple walking and talking . 

“sure its never stop me before i always break them in the end . And its RANSOM and the help calls me ...

“HUGH ! yeah i know “ Megan said getting up from her seat . “ you really are vile piece of work “ she barked as she walked away exiting the room 

“why thank you very much “ Ransom said amused , watching Megan walk towards the kitchen . His eyebrows shoot up curiosity , as his lips tighten 

“why does she need to go into the kitchen ?“ 

Ransom shot up and made his way back to the kitchen he was in moments ago . 

as he  got closer he heard mumbles of voice , as he hide around the corner 

“ i mean it y/n “  megan’s voice boomed 

ransom sighed shaking his head “what is she still doing down stairs she needs to be up there resting “

Ransom heard you delicate laugh that fluttered his heart  , he took  a quick glance and saw you standing at the sink , with your hands in the water , scrubbing away at a plate  “god she never listen , so stubborn ,she  needs to learn that its not just her she needs to look after now its our baby too “

“dont you think i know that Megan “ you giggled 

“y/n his a fuck boy okay , if you let him near you , he will use you and then leave you and move on to the next chase “

Ransom let out a snicker , but he couldn't blame his cousin he was indeed like that ,   that was before you , and Ransom hoped and prayed you knew he would never leave you especial now you and him were staring a family together 

“ Megan i know okay “ you dawned out “ i promise okay im not foolish enough to follow under the charm of  Hugh Drsysale okay “

 A smug devilish smile came to Ransom lips as he thought “but thats exactly what you did ! look at my girl lying so well , im rubbing of on her , well  she is growing a miniature version of me anyway “

if you had told Ransom a year ago that he would be in love and looking forwards to becoming a father , he would of laughed in your face , And if you said it was to the help well , you would simple end up in ER by the end of it . 

“ but y/n he has he eye on you “ megan stated 

and i was true , and its all Ransom would until his last breath 

“hes not going to st... “ 

“Who has an eye on y/n “ Joni interpreted her daughter as she stumbled in the kitchen from the other entrance 

“who is y/n anyway ?” she asked , megan pointed towards you as she rolled her eyes at her tipsy mom “oh the help ... who would want you “ she snarled . Ransom felt his blood began to boil at the way Joni was speaking to his girl 

“Ransom “ Megan simple answer . You cheeks become blushed with embarrassment , as you turned away from the sink , and began fiddling with the end of your apron and you become nervous . Ransom wanted nothing more then to wrap you in his arms and take you home , To spend the rest if the day sleep on the couch as Ransom babbles on about plans for the baby . As much as he tries to hide it Ransom cant help but be exited over the baby . That why his is so protective because if anything happened to you or the baby Ransom would loss the only happiness he has ever known . 

“pfff Ransom is many thing , a low life is one of them . But at least he has taste he wouldn't dare for for a fat , trampy ...” 

 before Joni could finish Ransom busted into the kitchen 

“say one more thing about me or her , and ill knock the Botox of your  face “ Ransom snarled ,fist  formed on his side . As everyone in the room , you , Megan , Joni and the rest of the help looked at him with wide eyes 

“pfff what ever you'll just get the STDs “ Joni wobbled 

“MOTHER !” megan shouted 

“you should know , how many people you passed it on to “ Ransom rage showing , as he stood right in front of Joni blocking her view of either you or Meg 

“WHY YOU LITTLE .....” Joni began to screech at the top of her lungs 

“What is going on in here !” Richard voice boomed throughout the kitchen , everyone glanced his way , seeing the rest of family moving into the kitchen 

“nothing “ megan answered as she went closer to you 

“pff doesn't sound like nothering “ Linda snirked downing the rest of her drink placeing her glass on the counter . starring at her son , who was clealry anger , as he starred daggeres towrads Joni with his fist still by his side turning white 

“son whats going on ?” Richard asks 

“yes id like to know that to “Walt questioned placing his hands on his hips  

Joni lened away from Ransom as her lip began to tremble “ i ... i dont know .. he just started ... on me “ Joni was trying to act all innocent , but it wasnt working on anyone as there all snirked , giggled with “ oh god “    “ here we go “    “ who is ready for the preference of a life tme “    “ oh mother “ 

But Ransom only lerned down towards his aunts ear , so only she could hear him “ i mean it joni say one more thing and ill tell Harlan were Megans college money realy goes “ he barked . 

Joni slapped Ransom full force around the face . The whole room fell slight , watching Rasom  wipe the little blood , form the small cut on his  bottom lip . Ransom smiple nodded his head and wnet to step forward with his fist ready , he didnt care if you were his family , his aunt , a women , she insuled his girl , called her fat when she is carrying his child . 

But just before Ransom could swing , you stepped inbetween Ransom and Joni , placing a hand on his chest while the other wrapped your hand around his fist and brung it down . While she starred into his blue eyes , that were iceberge forced on Joni , only to glance down at you and soft in to the blue ocean , that flashed with , conserin , guilt and above all love 

As the two of you stood there locked eyes with each other , the family looked at you two of you, squinting there eyes , amazed and confrussed on how you so easily calmed down  the short tempered , play boy . Harlan was rolled into the kitchen by Martha he looked around his family . He heard the screaming of couse , but he was beyonded confused on how silent his family , were as there all looked at Ransom . Harlans once eyebrows shoot up , at the way Ransom was looking at you . He shot at look up to Matha , who shrugged not knowing herself

“ oh great his fuckin the help “ Walt broke the silents lifting his armes in the air , shaking his head 

“fucked a baby into her too “ Ransom snarles , with a lovly smile , as he looked upon your shocked face , eyes wide month wide open . He just told everyone your biggest screate , you didnt know if you was to be anger at him or found it all funny . But how could you be mad at him and he locked eyes wit you stoking your cheek , as one hand went to you small blowed stomach , with love and effection . the room was quickly filled with screams , shouting and gasped 

“what !”

“HUGH RANSOM DRSYALDLE “ 

“hes joking right !” 

“that explain why his being acting weird “ 

“oh just like him to do that i bet she not the only one his knocked up “

“the help , and our family !”

“ you better be fuckin lying “ 

“OH SON !”

“SHE PROBABLY LIED TO HIM FOR THE MONEY !” 

“hes not fit to be  a father “

“there better get ride of it , “

“ Are you fuckin kidding me the help “ 

“so much of not going near him “

“of couse shes up the duff “

“ i never knew his stands where so low 

“really y/n “ 

you and ransoms just starred at each other slowing giggling with each other , that quickly turned into a booming laugh from the pair of you . the family grew slight , snarking at you and Ransom childish behaviour. While Ransom grabbed your hand , interwinding your fingers , as he gave you a knowing look , you simple nodded knowing what he was going to do  Moments later . You and Ransom were ranning through the halls of the manner , as Ransom held tight your hand as he dragged you behind him heading towards the front door , ignoring the shouts of the mad family 

END

But may add an odd one shot or two to the story in the future

[munsooon]

for once the ice cream machine isnt broken

someone asked for a part two to McAngst with a side of Fries and so i ran with it since the event happend like two years ago and ive gone through some character development 

its amazing the things distance can do. It had been approximately 3 months since you’d last seen the Doctor. the first month was hard however, getting settled in Earth was already a struggle in itself but the constant nagging thoughts of the Doctor at the back of your head didn't help. you cried yourself to sleep most times, you mostly stayed indoors, curled up in a ball on your couch, old show reruns playing on your television. you indulged in the sadness, knowing if you bottled it all up you’d be a ticking bomb of despair. so thats how you stayed for the first month. sad and miserable. you’re sure you’d cried more in that month than you ever will in your lifetime.

after the sadness came indifference. what happened happened, and as unfortunate and messy the whole ordeal was, you had to move on. there were days were you did great! you went out, hung out with friends, went to your favorite shops and treated yourself to some cute shoes. other days were a little harder, you’d lie if you said that second month your feelings for the Doctor had completely gone. you saw him in everything you did, everywhere you went, the constant though of him was with you. if you saw a squirrel or a cat, you thought about him and the things he’d say. he’d more than likely start communicating with them and then translate the conversation to you. or when you passed by a bakery, you knew if he was there the smell would intrigue him and he’d pull you towards the scent and demand you buy him one. sometimes when you sat at the roof of your apartment, and gazed at the moon and stars, you wondered if he looked at those same stars, and missed you as much as you did him. getting over someone as amazing as the Doctor seemed almost impossible.

almost. 

by the third month, the thought of him barely crossed your mind. you were able to really focus on yourself, no nagging at the back of your head. you could really go out an enjoy yourself 100%. it was only then, your heart no longer heavy, mind cleared, that you start missing the universe. you missed the thrill, the chaos, the beauty of it, but you werent going to call and ask if you could go back, your pride wouldnt let you. if it happened it happened, if it didnt you’d just have to find adventure yourself.

but after all that bad shit that has happened to you, you deserved to have some good karma. and so it happened.

it was the holiday season, and the Ponds decided to spend said holidays here on Earth, with you. You were happy of course! they were you best friends and you missed them just as much as the universe. Seeing the Doctor felt surreal, having him flash that smile at you was nice. but thats all it was. nice, there was no flutter of your heart, no butterflies, no shortness of breath, just, nice,

but you shouldve known better, because having the gang altogether called for trouble, and thats exactly what you got. and so off you were, another adventure at your feet. you missed this, them, him. River wasnt here, your dinner didnt last long enough for you to be able to catch up on everything that had happed the last three months. so when the group split, it was just you and Him. if you hadnt taken the time to heal, this- being alone with him- would've been a lot harder. for now you were just trying to catch your breath, gather your thoughts, come up with a plan to save the day. 

as you gathered yourself, you could feel his eyes on you, and so you looked up at him. when your eyes met, he gave you a smile, let out a chuckle. “I missed this,” he said, and you raised a brow.”What do you mean, you're constantly running from shit, how could you miss it?” you asked, confused. 

He let out a sigh, and let his head fall, his hair falling around his face, covering his eyes. “that’s not-” he took a big breath, “-thats not what i meant.” he still wasnt looking you in the eyes.

“Oh?”

“what i meant was this, running from trouble with you,”

oh fuck 

“Doctor..”

“These past months have felt like forever without you,” he finally looked up again, his expression... sad.

you have an idea of where this conversation might be headed, and you wanted him to stop. 

“River told me everything,” he said, voice solemn. 

you jaw locked, eyebrows furrowed, body tense. you dont care, about him or River or wherever this dumb conversation was going. you were doing good, youve healed, if he truly knew about the situation he should see how good youre doing despite the absolute heartbreak you went through a few months ago, you dont understand why hes saying this.

“Dont,” was all you could say, the fear of the dam breaking too overpowering to let you say anything more. 

“When i was with her i thought thats what i wanted, but after a while, without having you there, it just didnt feel right. i figured out it was you, who i wanted. and im an idiot because i’d already known that but i pushed those feelings away- i didnt think you’d like me back. and i felt lost and sad and then something was happening with River and i just let myself get swept away, and it was irrational and in the end i ended up hurting both of you..”

“Doctor, stop.”

“and i think the guilt of how everything happened and not giving you an explanation was too much for her so she told me everything and then everything made sense!” he was pacing, running his hands through his hair, eyes watery. 

“Doctor thats enough,” your voice was barely above a whisper, but with those satellite for ears he had you knew he’s heard you.

“we ended things, on good terms, doesnt matter anymore shes not- with us anymore... but we ended it befire that so dont think im only saying this casue im a widow but i just wanted you to kno-”

“well i dont care! okay? whatever happened is a thing of the past and these three months ive taken the time to heal and, and get over you-” your voice was cracking, your cheeks were wet, “and i dont care anymore. those feelings aren't a part of me anymore. and id rather they stay like that."

he was quiet, eyes glossy. you probably looked worse.

"look me in the eyes and tell me you don't feel anything for me anymore," he said, slowly stepping close to you. once he was in front of you he gently cupped your face in his hands.

his big, soft, warm hands. they felt so right holding you.

you didn't look him in the eyes, you couldn't, they were so sincere, and big enough to fit the whole universe in them.

tears silently spilled from your eyes, everytime he caught them and wiped them away.

you looked into his eyes, and before you could lie and tell him you felt nothing for him, he gently kissed you.

it felt so right, to be held and kissed by the Doctor. you fear nothing in your life will ever feel as right as this.

[maggyme13]

Sugar (3/?)

AN: Here is my third chapter of my SugardaddyLoki AU:) I hope you like the Chapter for this week :)

Warnings: not really

Wordcount: around 1600

Masterlist

Sugar- Masterlist

Part 2

You had decided to bake some chocolate-apple-pie after your grandmothers recipe together with some Pasta and self made tomato-sauce, hoping the male would like the food.

The apartment had started to smell delicious, yourself nibbling on some bread Pietro had brought with him from his grocery shopping.

He had mentioned that Mr Laufeyson usually did not eat breakfast at the flat, but got something on his way. So you had needed to get your breakfast supplies, or your mornings would be hungry.

At least he had tea. A lot of tea and a lot of different kinds.

Now, the kitchen was stocked with every essential thing someone would need.

Food was finished around dinner time and you were just cleaning the kitchen of any evidence of your session, when the front-door opened.

You froze in anticipation and worry.

“Food is already here. Good. Please serve while I change into something different.”, the male called and not a second later you heard another door close.

Doing as asked, you plated your home-cooked meal and placed a dish where he had sat the day prior, you sitting down with your own serving in the same manor.

It did not take long for him to emerge again and join you at the large table.

“This looks quite good. Now it only has to taste as such.”, he mumbled, eyeing the food in front of him before taking a small bite.

You waited, anxious, for his reaction and could not suppress a smile when you saw him relax into the food.

He liked it.

“This – this is good. Where did you get it? I have to put it on Pietro´s list of shops to buy from.”, he asked you, already preparing the next bite.

“I made it.”, you whispered, awaiting his reaction.

You were not disappointed: His shewing stopped, his eyes wandering to look at you. He gulped the food he had in his mouth.

“You are telling me, that you cooked this meal yourself? How and Why?”

“I spoke with Pietro and he offered to get the ingredients, what he did. I found the utensils in the cupboards.”

“Well, that explains how, but not why.”

“I, I didn´t know what to get, and I like to cook. It is also cheaper-”, the last part was only a whisper, but he still heard it.

“I don´t think I need to have an eye on how much money I spend for food and take-outs.”

“I apologize Mr Laufeyson.”, you quickly added, averting your eyes.

“It is quite delicious.”, he continued, “Well done.”

Warmth spread through your veins upon hearing the males praise and you couldn´t suppress a shy smile.

“You may cook more often.  Now, if you would excuse me, I have an early meeting tomorrow and therefore will go to bed now.”, he declared, already standing up.

“I- there is dessert.”, you quickly stated, “I mean- if you want. I can but it in the fridge. The pie might not taste as good as now, but still good.”

“You made pie?”, he mused, sitting down again, “What kind of pie.”

“Apple chocolate after my grandma´s recipe.”, you whispered.

He stayed silent and you took it as a sign to serve the desert. Gathering the used dishes, you placed them aside and got the pie out of the oven to plate it with some powdered sugar.

Mr Laufeyson looked at for a few second, before taking a very small piece onto his fork and eating it.

His face kept neutral, though he ate it all.

“As I said. I will be retreating for the night. Tomorrow morning the cleaning service will come to clean the apartment. Just as a heads-up. Have a good night.”

And with that, the man retreated to his quarters.

Well, better get the kitchen cleaned and then to bed.

Thanks to the fact that you had already cleaned most of the things after using them, the kitchen was spotless within ten minutes with the leftovers secured within the fridge. Labeled with the date you had cooked them.

It was nearly enough to feed one more person.

Shutting off the light, within the main area, you stepped into your bedroom, only to stop short; on your bed were four black boxes with silver ribbons.

Presents.

When did he get them in here? What is in there?

Slowly you approached your bed, letting your fingers brush over the soft fabric of the ribbons, once you were able to.

The boxes had the Ásgard´-logo imprinted into the top.

More clothes? But-

With gentle hands, you opened the first bow and then box.

Is that Lingerie? What does this mean?

Shocked, you lifted the first pair of clothes out of the box. It wasn´t lingerie as you first thought, it was a nightdress.

Does he expect me to wear this?

Quickly you opened the other boxes as well, and the next two contained a similar kind  of clothing.

That was, until you opened the last box and a relieved sigh escaped your lungs. Your eyes fell onto some new shirts and boxer-shorts. First were made of extremely soft cotton, last were made of silk.

You just had to wear them, the leggings and shirt you had worn previously had been to warm for your liking and felt wrong to your skin beneath the covers.

Ready for bed, you placed the boxes into the walk-in. You would sort them away in the morning.

With your mobile phone charging and the alarm set for 6:30am, you closed your eyes to sleep.

You woke up with the alarm and decided it was a good day to start with a shower.

Dressed as casually as possible, you made your way to the kitchen area with still wet hair.

You were surprised to see Mr Laufeyson already sitting there. “Good morning.”, you mumbled.

“Good Morning. I did not thought I would see you this early.”, he greeted you in return, sipping on his tea.

“I am used to get up early to do work.”, you admitted, preparing your own breakfast with the stuff Pietro got you the day prior.

“I see. Pietro will drive me to work this morning. I have a conference call with some important people. After that he can drive you wherever you want. There is a credit card on the little table next to your door. It has an allowance of  10.000$ a week. I may allow you to use more, should I see it necessary and you ask me beforehand. You need to have your ID with you though. Otherwise the card will not be accepted.”

He spoke almost bored, like that sum of money were just peanuts.

“Ten-thousand a week?”,you stated with huge eyes.

“Not enough?”

“Too much. Tha- thats more than I made in four months working. Wha- what should I do with that much?”, you quickly explained.

“Buy what you want, as long as you don´t buy at the opponents shops. The cleaning crew will be working from 10 to 12am. See you sometime today.”, and with that, the sharp dressed man left.

Leaving you with no idea what you should do with your day.

Sighting, you grabbed the offered card and stared at it for a long time.

I could visit Bob and Monty,  maybe get them some food or things they need. And then buy stuff for the shelter. At least I would do good with all this money.

You still did not want pity money and felt dirty accepting it.

Using your new phone (because you couldn´t find a pen and some paper to make notes), you wrote stuff you though you should get to not accidentally forget something.

It got rather long, and you hoped you would be able to get all this without renting a truck.

“And I need some reeeeeaally simple stuff to wear.”, you mumbled.

The ringing of your phone caught your attention. Pietro was calling you.

“Good Morning. How can I help you?”, you greeted him politely, just like you had done with your customers just a few days ago.

“(y/n), It´s Pietro. Boss said to call you once I am free. Soooo, I am free. Any idea what you want to do? I can drive you wherever you want.”, the young man´s voice came out of the speaker.

“Thank you, that would be nice. I have a few stops I would like to make- if that is not too much trouble.”, you smiled into the phone.

“Not at all, I would just be earning my money. I will be at the tower in the next ten minutes. If you want, you can wait in the lobby. I will come and get you.”

“Okay. Thank you.”

“No worries. See you in Ten.”, and with that the line went dead.

“Well .. then let´s get down there I guess.”, you mumbled, grabbing your phone and wallet, you got on your way  down to the lobby.

It was rustling with live and you searched for a calmer area to wait for the blond young men.

You felt out of place and feared they would kick you out any second now, but instead, your phone rang again and you accepted Pietro´s call.

“I am up front. Are you ready to go?”

“I am coming out, give me a second.”

“Sure, it´s the black Dodge SUV.”

“Got it.”

Part 4

AN2.0 Well, Loki seemed to like her food. What do you think she will do with all the money?

REBLOGS and comments are appreciated, though any request of a SUGARDADDY looking for a Baby will be deleted… just like the last 30 in the first two parts…..

Thank you very much.

~MaggY

Taglists:

Permanent:

@jadepc@pacifyhxlsey @thankyoukarenclifford

@thankyouforanonymity  @punkrockhufflefluff

@scarletraine @buckycaptspideypool  @markusstraya @graveyard-groupie @markusstrayya @randomgirlkensy @the-soulofdevil

MCU:

@yknott81    @banner-and-bucky-are-life @forext20 @dyanlzbb  @so-finster-die-nacht @emmii4 @bitchwhytho @ladyofmyst   @jilldsumner @momc95 @appreciating-fanfics

Sugar:

@bits-and-bobs-and-kawaii-stuffs @mimmie666   @fullranchwolfoperator

@cluelessnitwhit @youknowitsclouds @his-paradox @purplerainharry

@spootgaai2000 @iamsuperjenna @nikkipea   @alexakeyloveloki

I couldnt tag a few of you… sorry.

Want to get tagged as well? Comment, Reblog or send an ask to let me know.

[strawberryspeachy]

So on the last day of july i went clubbing

Almost immediately met a cute boy and he asked me to go to a hotel with him. I debated but ultimately went with him. He asked if i wanted to go on a date because fucking japanese assholes equate date with hotel.

Went. Hooked up. Then. He said he wanted to go back to the club because otherwise “it would be a waste of his night”

Yeah

So... went back.... watched him look for another girl. And felt like shit

Eventually a boy that was ok looking talked to me. I didnt ignore him and he got excited over me talking to him after having ignored other boys. I didnt intend to continue talking to him but he was so excited the entire time and was nice so i just stayed with him.

We left together and sat on some sidewalk and talked. I saw that both his arms had cut marks all over them

And as a fucked up person... i stupidly think that other fucked up people will be as empathetic as i try to be and my depressed friends back home

He told me some of his shitty homelife - apparently he doesnt have parents

He asked me to go to a hotel with him and i said no... so we went to eat instead...

He kept being overly nice (in words) told me that he works at an old folks home and that he wants to learn english and come to america and help me take care of my mom.... in a sudden way

Rationally im not stupid and know that was a line. But im pretty stupid in general

He kept asking me to be his gf and i told him id need to go on a date with him to decide that

I just wanted to say no but...

He didnt pay for my meal - ya im one of those girls that that bothers

We seperated and he continued to text my the next few days. We set up a date. He asked me to go to him in yokohama - an hour away from tokyo

Since id never been there i said yes. But this meant i had to pay an expensive train ticket

He did pay for dinner and afterwards convience store for me... mostly... asking if i had change

He wanted to drink at the pier and insisted i get a drink but didnt pay for it

And then took me back to his apartment

It ended up being fun

The next morning while he was showering i was just poking around at his stuff. Not actually looking for anything just curious about the things he has

I looked at his wallet (honestly to see the design but i also always wonder why japanese guys are so comfortable leaving money around who is generally a stranger)

And then. I found. Picture from a photobooth. Him amd soem girl. It was dated from a week before.

He told me the night we met that he broke up with his ex a year ago. But this picture looked very much like a couple

I asked him about it and he just said sorry and threw it in the trash (not a real trash. It could easily be taken out) he said it was from a year ago

After. Bit i took it out amd pointed at the date. He literally hummed and refused to comment ...but he told me hell only see me...

I shouldn’t take that as enough but i did and told him when i got home that ill only se him too. I told him i liked him - and to this point he kept saying he likes me over and over. He has not said it since this. Just said he was happy that i used his name.

After that i went to okinawa for a few days. He told me his sim card broke and he doesnt have wifi unless he goes to a convience store (as an excuse to text slow)

I got back the next week and stayed home all week from a yeast infection that i think he gave me. When he barely responded i told him that

Then he responded continuously telling me that i just got it on my own and hes healthy so it wasnt him

That weekend i went drinking with some friends and messaged him. He responded immediately and i called him. Asking when his phone got fixed. He told me the day before

Then he told me he has pink eye and sent a picture. He said he cant go out of his house because of it

The next week was my birthday. He said hed be cured the day after and we could celebrate. Then he cancelled saying the doc told him hes still contagious

A few days after he sent me a picture of him with makeup on and contacts in saying he went to the salan. I responded immediately asking if he was still contagious and tried to call. He ignored me

I tried to call more throughout the day

Nothing

Over 24 hours pased so i used another account to say hi to him. After 2 hours he responded to the fake account asking who it was

And i flipped the fuck out. I told him a bunch of reasons why he sucked and that he did and fuck him

Then he responded to me with long messages. Many of which i couldnt understand (hes used incorrect kanji before that which makes translation strained)

His excuse was that he felt sick and slept for 20 hours (but he ignored me for over 27)and that he wanted to answer his texts in order. That he doesnt look at him phone much and then got mad at me for not being worried about him and instead getting mad

He didnt addresss any of my complaints like the fact that if im his gf i should be a priority

But because im a sucked i felt bad for trying to hurt him and apologized.... he said hed forgive me if i buy him an accessory next time we hung out...

Yeah. Red flags. I too if i had other options... would have said. Thats a weird way to accept an apology.

Also before (on that first date) when we talked about our bdays cause his was a bit before mine. I asked him what hed wanna do as a late celebration. He immediately told me he wanted yakiniku (an expensive meat meal) and clothes or accessorys from an expensive brand he likes...

So he continued to take over 24 hours to reply to me. With very small responces - he never asks me questions. I asked him to call the night before i went camping and he said he couldnt because he was too drunk from drinking with friends. I went camping and came back and got him on the phone. I demanded him to call and he said he couldnt cause he was tired from work and would the following day

I told him it makes me upset that he doesnt talk to me and that i constantly dont feel good because of him. He just said sorrry. I planned to say this is over if he didnt agree to meet me. But he agreed to a date the coming sunday... the day before i began work again. He said hed come to tokyo and and had a plan. It sounded fun.

Well come sunday morning.... he cancelled. He said he didnt have money. I tried to call him several times and he ignored me.

I confronted him in person. He got mad at me for it. Said he got some sort debt collection and got frauded... someone used his name to take out money and he has to pay court. He said he doesnt have money because of it.

I asked why he never tells me whats going on with him (because im dumb and beleive this... actually i dont. I hope hes being honestly and just has really bad luck but)

This time like last time i told him the way he treats me is how really awful boys who are using me and playing with me treat me. And i cant trust him if hes like this but doesnt tell me why

Well...i was there... i offered to pay for out date.... besides the 11 dollars it takes to get to him

He asked me to put 5 dollars on his train card.... it takes 3 dollads to get to and from where we went. He... mad sure no matter where we would eat it would cost 40 bucks - wanting to drink alc and such. It costed 43 dollars. He wanted starbucks but i kinda said no by saying i dont rlly like starbucks - but he still wanted to get a dessert - 3 dollars

And... he wanted me to buy him that aftermentioned accessory... a ring. He looked at very expensive ones... i... would not have paid for even as stupid as i am.. the one he got was 15 or 25 I forget which...

The thing is... if he wasnt actually... if i wasn’t comfortable being with him i woulda stopped this before... unfortunately. As usual. Despite initially not being attracted to him i really enjoyed his company and find him to be fun...

He said that we should go home at 8 i asked about going back to him place and he said no because hes tired and has work the next day. He knows i also do too. At the same time. And i tried to convince him and he kept saying no. Then i asked doesnt he wanna have sex. He said that we should go to a hotel. And i protested that hotels are expensive and his apartments free and just a cheap train station away. He said hes too tired and just wants to sleep at his apartment but hotels are exciting so hed be awake at a hotel.

He pushed them and i said at that point id be spending like 100 dollars on the day and he knows i also dont have a lot of money.

We awkwardly went to a manga cafe that was only 5 dollars but it wanted you to make a card that costs 5 more dollads. And then i got fussy because too much stress literally makes me lose control of my emotions.

It fucking sucks and i hate it. I have no fucking control over my emotions when my stress is bubbling (which it almost always is) and boils over.

I asked him if he can even pay just the 5 dollars and he said he has no money. I asked how hes gonna get to work with literally no money and he said his conpany pays for it (yea japanese conpanies pay AFTER you go )

We left. It was a bad mood. He didnt storm away from me even though i was basically crying in the street (i have had this happen with even friends. I start crying and they just walk away so even though it should be expected of someone claiming to be your bf... ya)

Anyhow i told him i just wanted to cuddle and talk and kiss

He looked annoyed but i guess he thought those wants were cute and looked for a isolated place

Because were in japan

Couldnt find one cause we were in a city and he again just started saying lets go home. That hes tired and not in the mood.

But we were in a quiet enough play.

And im bitching here but ill take a quick break to say i kept hugging him and stuff which he liked despite saying he was really embarrassed

He told me ealier ok that because of this debt thing hes gonna work two jobs

Which. Terrified me. The first guy I went on a date with in Japan asked me to be his gf and to move in with him and said he had to work two jobs for a month to afford to move so he wouldnt have time to see me. He told me his progress for two weeks and then ghosted me.

This boy told me hell make time to see me when i complained about not doing anything physical when i wouldnt see him again for who knows how long

Welp. Todays saturday and that was sunday. And while at first i thought he was trying because he replied to my messages in or at 24 hours for a few days. Its gone back to the 17 hours

And i asked him to talk on the phone

And he just said not tonight because after his current job hes working at home too

And because im dumb ive waisted my whole saturday waiting for him to reply and crying.

[todancealongthelightofday]

Well.

It's official. I’m off facebook. I had to. I can't continue to hurt myself obsessing over what you're doing and what people are saying about me. I can't be worried about every post I make and who may get upset or how much of my personal life I accidentally reveal. I'm struggling with myself to not give into the temptation of being petty. I want to show every single one of those girls you added this week all of the screenshots I have of you being the absolute worst. I want to tell your family that you never “went so hard” on me because I was “pulling some shit”. that never happened and you know it. You sit alone, bored, with a dry phone and so you decide to “miss me” and apologize and make all these promises that things will be different. The same promises that ive heard 1000 times already. Nothing was ever different. Just last night, when you accused me of so many things, you yourself were lying to me. Your snap count keeps going up, yet you yell at me that you're not talking to anyone and you'll delete snapchat. Why would it matter if you deleted it anyway? you just redownload it when I'm not around, just like you always have. Thats the thing. The trust is gone. You've used it up. You've taken every bit of trust I have and shattered it. I can't even go to my hometown anymore because I don't know who I can trust. Who you've poisoned. I know you're not telling anyone what really happened. I assume you're spinning a narrative along the lines of “she couldn't handle me being gone all the time and she was being a bitch so we broke up” instead of “I was unfaithful the entire relationship because I have a sex addiction, but I stopped wanting sex with her a long time ago. I also stopped loving her the way she craved to be loved. I stopped kissing her. I stopped calling her beautiful. I stopped enjoying her company on the couch for a lazy movie day. I stopped appreciating her as she held down the fort while I went away for work and flirted and partied and ignored her. While I was gone, she was at work or at home. She was paying bills and calling plumbers and yard workers, and getting estimates on fence work and painters and floor replacements. She was cooking and cleaning and caring for our dogs. She was allowing others to stay in the house because they fell on hard times. She was rehabbing baby animals and getting broken glass doors replaced. She was doing everything she could to bring light and happiness to everyone (and every animal) she could. And she was doing it all while being neglected. Doing it all for me while I was going out and disrespecting her and our commitment.” I know thats not what you're telling them, but thats the story id really like people to know. I want them to know that I cried myself to sleep every night that I would call you before bed, after not talking to you all day, and you “had nothing to say. I just worked all day. I'm tired. goodnight”. I would cry on the bathroom floor when you would come home after 3 months and never kiss me or hug me. just walk past me and ask “who's coming over tonight? lets cook!”. I would spend hours steaming floors and dusting fans and washing blankets and shampooing carpets and then I would shower and dress up and do my makeup and wear my best outfit down to the panties, and you would just come home, have people over, get sloppy drunk, and pass out, leaving me to host until everyone left, clean the mess that 10 drunk people and a bbq is bound to leave, then crawl into bed at 4 AM. Then I would get up at 6:30 to start the morning routine. Dogs out. Feed cats. Let dogs in and feed them. Feed the fish and the tortoise. Let the dogs out again. Switch the laundry, unload the dishwasher. You would just lay in bed all day. If you got up, it was probably 2 or 3 in the afternoon and you'd sit on the couch and watch tv while I did your laundry and whatever other things needed to be done that day. I would beg you to come with me for Tyson’s vet appointment, and of course you'd say no. I’d tell you my family was having a crawfish boil and you'd say you were too tired or “dont feel like being around people”. But thats not true, was it. You just didn't want to be around those people. You were always ready to go to bars and drink and ignore me. thats the people you like. the ones that don't know you and that assume you're single because you haven't touched me or kissed me or danced with me once all night. But oh... if Claire wants to dance or if a guy starts talking to Leah, you're on that shit. Cant let YOUR eye candy get taken by some guy at a bar. Yet I was forced to break a mans nose. I was forced to defend myself, because when he disrespected me, you where nowhere to be found. Probably watching some girl, too distracted to know that a man was trying to hurt me. But doing worry. I dealt with it. Im stronger than you think. I made it through all that. I made it through so many nights of hating myself and questioning what I did wrong and why I wasn't good enough. What I could do to be good enough for you. I didn't leave when you invited Linzy to sleep in your bed and stoped coming visit because she would be bored alone if you left. I didn't leave when your snapchat was all women that you would snap all day long and never save anything so I could never see it. I didn't leave when you fixated on the idea of Sadie showing her tits in new Orleans while I stood right in front of you. I also didn't leave when, that same night, you “jokingly” grabbed at her chest and when we went home, your phone “accidentally got left in the bathroom standing up in a strange place and took pictures of her in the shower”. I didn't leave. I stayed and I believed you because for a day or two after an incident you would love me again. you would kiss me and hug me and have sex with me. Then as soon as I believed you, it would stop and you'd go back to your fuck boy shit. You'd go back to “being so tired” that you couldn't call me before bed but you had time to talk to Claire and invite her to your hotel room. You couldn't be bothered to give me the attention I had been begging for, but you could find time to snapchat my sister and “dare her to flash you as a joke”. Or what about the time you “accidentally” sent her a snap of your dick in the shower?! I am so angry and so hurt. Honestly I don't even remember what the point of this post was. Its gone from having a purpose to the words jus falling out of my heart and into my keyboard. I know I made the right choice. I saw something earlier that said “Sometimes you have to break your heart to find your peace” and honestly that is what im doing. Im so hurt and so scared and I feel small and lost, but after typing all these things, I remember why I left you. I know these negative feelings will pass and my life will get back on track and ill be happy and I know that one day I will find a man that knows how to love. A man that knows how broken I am and the trauma that iv gone through and he just supports me and loves me the way I've always wanted. So im deleting facebook so that I am no longer hurt by all the lies you're spreading and all the women you're fucking. Im choosing to fix me. I am choosing to stand myself up and climb out of this rubble and keep moving forward. Im choosing to start putting myself back together so that when that man finds me, im ready to let him hold me. Also, sorry to anyone that gets stuck reading this. It is word vomit on a page and I apologize for my shit writing and rambling. I just kinda let myself type whatever came out. This is my life. this is me. Well. its at least the tip of the iceberg of the hot mess that is me. 

[fiftyshadesgrl]

Part two of my brantley gilbert series! I hope everyone enjoys it.

I wake up to find myself tangled up around Brantley. Hes still asleep and its dark outside. I hear a humming sound then a bump. I realize the bus is moving. I jump up, "oh my god!"

Brantley sits up in a panic, "what is it baby?"

I pull the sheet up around me suddenly feeling vulnerable. "The bus is moving. I cant go anywhere! I have to go home."

He wraps me in his arms to comfort me. "Its okay baby girl. Why dont you just stay for the next couple of shows then if you still wanna go home, Ill make sure you get there."

"I have to work. I cant just give everything up to be a groupie."

"Hey." He said making me look at him. "You will never be a groupie. You are way better than that and you know it. Just give us some time, give me some time to show you that this time will be different."

I sigh, "what about my work?"

"Call them and tell them you need some time off."

I snicker, "the real world doesnt work like that. We cant all be Brantley Gilbert."

He lays back down and smiles, "Hell Ill call em myself." I laughed at that and can actually see him doing that. I shake my head and turn my phone on and find its only 2 in the morning. I quickly text my boss and tell him that Im taking my vacation early and Id be back in two weeks. I turn my phone back off and lay back down cuddling up to brantley.

He wraps his arms around me and kisses me. I moan and crawl on top of him. "Damn baby girl, youre gonna wear me out." He says smiling. I smiled back down at him, I cant believe I have him all to myself but the memory of three years ago comes flooding back to me.

3 years ago.....

I was out with mama becky trying to find the right dress that made me feel beautiful. I wanted to blow brantleys mind in a couple months when we say I do. Mama becky turns to me as we pull into the driveway, "hows he been lately?" I sigh and shake my head. "He has his good days and bad days."

His mama had tears in her eyes, "these days its more bad than good." I nodded but pasted a smile on my face.

"Dont worry mama, things will get better. Hopefully he will sober up by the wedding." I said hopeful but doubt still clung heavily in my mind and heart.

I hugged her and jumped out of the truck. "Ill come back this way in a couple of days to talk about the flowers and everything." Mama becky said and I nodded and waved as she pulled out of mine and brantleys driveway.

The house was unusually quiet, brantley usually had music blaring or playing his guitar chugging beer out on the front porch. I unlocked the door and walked in. "Brantley, Im back." Not one word, I walked towards the bedroom where the door was cracked open. I peeked through the crack and saw brantley laying on his stomach in bed sleeping.

I smiled at the sight of him, no matter what we go through he always and will forever hold my heart. I decided I would jump on him and wake him up that way. As I pushed the door open I gasped at what I saw. Amber, his ex laying on my side of the bed with my fiancee'.

Clothes, both his and hers, thrown everywhere meaning they were naked under the thin sheet that lay on top of them. I stood there just staring, I couldnt believe he would do this to me. He promised he would never hurt me.

I got my wits about me and finally spoke. "What the hell brantley!" He flipped over but amber still lay there sleeping. I wanted nothing more than to drag her by the hair of her head out of my house and beat her ass.

He jumped up out of bed and pulled his boxers up. I wanted to throw something at him, slap him, do something but I stood froze to the spot. He stumbled over to me and grabbed my arm and walked outside of our bedroom shutting the door.

I stopped just a few steps from the bedroom door and pulled away from him. "What the hell? Im gone for one day and youve got that whore in our bed!"

He held up his finger to his lips, "shhh."

That pissed me off that much more. "You want me to be quiet!? So I dont disturb that homewreckers sleep! I dont give a fuck if she sleeps good or not. You and her both are very lucky I dont beat both of your asses!" I got right up in his face and dared him to tell me to be quiet again.

"Look," he said holding his hands up, "I got bored last night and you wasnt here again, so I went out to the bar. She was there and I was lonely. Youre never around anymore I need some love every now and then."

I slapped him across his face hard. His head snapped back but I didnt care. "Youre a asshole, I have been planning OUR wedding that you didnt want to help with. You wouldnt be alone if you would stop popping pills and drinking and come with me and help."

He looked back at me but there was no emotion on his face. Thats what worried me most. He wasnt feeling anything. "You know I would disappoint you at our wedding if I helped. Id get something wrong."

"Well you can forget about the wedding. It seems like you got all you need right in there." I pointed towards the bedroom door. I walked towards it and slung it open. Amber was standing beside the bed just pulling brantleys shirt over her body.

I pointed at her, "you say a god damn word and Ill fuckin stomp a mudhole in your ass. I advise you to get the fuck out before I change my mind and do it anyway." She grabbed her pants and pulled them on and headed out of the room.

I grabbed a duffle bag and started shoving my clothes in it. "What are you doing?" I heard brantley say behind me. I gave a humorless chuckle and kept stuffing clothes in it.

"What does it fuckin look like?" I threw over at my shoulder.

"Looks like your making the biggest mistake of your life." He said emotionless.

Before I knew what I was doing I picked up one of his heavy boots and threw it. The boot connected with the aide of his face. "Mistake!? You think Im making a mistake. No honey you made the biggest mistake of YOUR life the moment you picked that whore up and brought her to our house!"

I kept packing my clothes and when the duffle bag was full I zipped it up and threw it over my shoulder. "Ill send kolby or mama becky to get the rest of my stuff. Dont call me when you get sober." I walked out towards the front door but stopped before I walked outside.

My heart was breaking into a million pieces. The love of my life cheated on me and doesnt seem to care. I heard his footsteps behind me.

"You walk out that door, dont you ever come back." He said, I dropped my bag and turned towards him. He smiled thinking I had decided to stay.

The tears started flowing freely then. Seeing how cold he was towards me, no emotion no love in his eyes. "What happened to us? We used to be so happy. When did things go bad?" I asked almost in a whisper.

He shrugged, "I dont know. I guess I fell out of love with you a long time ago. I dont want you anymore, Im moving on to better things. Keep the ring, pawn it, sell it whatever you wanna do."

I nodded and took the ring off my finger that I thought would never come off. I placed it in the palm of his hand and closed his hand around it. "Take care of yourself brantley." I walked back over to the door and picked my bag up and walked out to my old mustang sitting in the driveway.

I threw my bag in the back seat and slammed my car door. I started my car and drove down the driveway. I looked in my rearview mirror and saw brantley standing on the porch staring at my ring in his hand.

I drove all night that night until I made it to florida. I stopped at the first hotel and checked in. I called mama becky as soon as I was settled and told her what had happened. After that phone call I texted brantleys brother kolby and asked him to pick my stuff up from brantleys. He said he would and asked if I was okay. I replied with a simple 'I will be.' I turned my phone off and curled up on the bed crying myself to sleep.

1 year later....

I was working at a local diner as a waitress working nights mostly but whenever someone called in I would be the first to take their shift. I was run down but I needed the money.

It was a little after 1 in the morning and there was no one in the diner. I took that moment to walk outside for a smoke break. My eyes felt heavy and I probaly got a total of 4 hours of aleep over the past 36 hours. Rent had to be paid so I sucked it up and done what had to be done. I walked back into the diner and I heard on the speakers a voice from the local radio dj.

'Here is the new single from the newest and hottest thing in country music today. Heres shes my kinda crazy by brantley gilbert.' 

My heart stopped as I heard his beautiful voice coming through the speakers. I closed my eyes and the lyrics just broke my heart. I have missed him so much and I still think about the day that everything changed. The bell above the door rang as someone came in the diner.

Sal the night manager walked out feom behind the counter. "Sit anywhere you like sir, our waitress will be with you shortly." I was still stuck in a daze but I cleared my head and pulled out my paper and pen ready to take the order.

I turned and walked over to the booth where the man was sitting. I couldnt believe my eyes. Brantley sitting there drumming his fingers on the table. Watching me. I stumbled a bit but remembered what happened a year ago. I stood straighter and walked over, not looking at him.

"What can I get you?" I said very coldly.

"How bout a smile darlin." He said smoothly.

I rolled my eyes. "We only serve food and drinks here. You want a smile theres a bar right across the way there. Im sure you will find lots of them there."

I still had my eyes glued to my pad of paper, my pen hovering waiting for him to say what he really wanted. After a few minutes I turned my back "let me know when you decide."

That statement was about more than just his food choices. I was wanting ro see if he really had changed. I took the rag from behind the counter and started wiping tables down that were already squeaky clean. I just wanted to keep busy. I wanted to keep my mind off of brantley.

I saw movement from the corner of my eye. I looked up and brantley was motioning for me. I walked over pulling my pen and paper pad out again. "Finally decide on something?"

I still wouldnt look at him, he sighed "yeah burger, fries, and a mountain dew."

I scribbled it down and ripped the paper off. "Alright be right back with your drink." I said turning before he could say anything else. I gave the order to the cook and got his drink ready. I waited until his food was done before I took it to him.

"Heres your food and your drink. Enjoy." I said trying to turn away but he grabbed my wrist.

"Why dont you have a seat? Looks like im your only customer so you cant be busy."

I growled and plopped down on the other side of the booth looking at anywhere but at him. I kept quiet, the only sound was the music comig from the speakers and the hum from the fridge behind the counter.

"Would you just look at me (Y/N)? Please?" He said sounding exhausted. I sighed and looked him dead in the eyes. Shutting off all emotions. I waited for him to speak, he sighed and closed his eyes. He shook his head, "you look tired."

I chuckled humorlessly, "wow thanks. Thats a nice way of saying I look like shit."

He shook his head, "no I meant it just like it came out. You look tired. But youre still beautiful."

I snickered and rolled my eyes. "Rents gotta be paid brantley. I have to work to make rent." He nodded and he opened his mouth but before he could speak I cut him off. "Why the hell are you here brantley?"

He grabbed for my hand but I pulled back. "I came to see you darlin."

I rolled my eyes, "well you saw me. Now can I get back to work?"

I went to get up but this time he did grab my hand. "Please just talk to me. Its been a year. Im sober now. Thinking clearly for the first time."

I smiled at that, "thats great brantley." I pulled my hand from his and stood up. "Im really happy that you have turned your life around. I heard your song on the radio right before you came in. Its great, just hate that its about that damn whore." I said the last part through gritted teeth. He shook his head and opened his mouth as if to say something but the bell rang above the door before he could.

I turned to see a young couple that looked weary from a road trip come in. "Hey yall sit anywhere you want. Ill be right there." I turned back towards brantley who still hadnt touched a bite of his food. I shrugged, "duty calls. Heres your check, if you want anything else let me know and Ill adjust it. If not sal can ring you up when youre done. Bye brantley, take care of yourself."

The younger couple ordered breakfast platters and coffee so I was pretty busy with refilling their cups and everything. Right as my shift ended an hour later I walked outside and lit me a much needed cigarette. I started walking over to my mustang but slowed up when I noticed brantleys truck parked right beside it. Brantley was leaning against the side of it casually smoking a cigarette himself.

I walked over just as he threw his cigarette to the ground. "There you are." He said smiling.

I fished my keys out of my purse and went to unlock my door. Brantley stopped me before I could climb in. "Hey, I was hoping we could talk for a minute." He said, his voice filled with hope.

I sighed and slumped against my car. "Im very tired brantley. I wanna go home and go to bed. Make it quick." I sighed glancing at my watch.

"Okay, look I know things ended bad between us and everything." I raised one of my eyebrows at him and crossed my arms. "Whats your point brantley?"

He sighed, "I dont know what Im trying to say. Look, mama told me where you were and I wanted to bring some stuff to you. I thought you might want it." He handed me a box the size of a shoe box. I took it and nodded.

"I uh, got a show the next town over. If you want Ill leave you a ticket at will call." He said rubbing the back of his neck.

I turned and climbed in my car and placed the box beside me in the seat. "Thanks but no thanks. Im swamped at work and I cant afford to take off."

He nodded and leaned down, "I know I just thought...."

I cut him off before he could speak. "Nothings changed brantley. Now if youll excuse me Im going home to get some sleep before my next shift in a few hours."

I cranked my car and didnt give him a chance to reply. I knew if he did then I would probably break. It was hard enough seeing him tonight and trying to act like I didnt care. All I wanted to do was throw myself in his arms and let him kiss away this last miserable lonely year.

Also in the back of my mind was what he did. He cheated when he promised he never would. He promised he would always love me but he told me that day he fell out of love with me. I could never forget that.

I drove back to my small apartment and headed straight for the bed. Sleep came easy but those blue eyes haunted my dreams.