I posted 21,135 times in 2022
499 posts created (2%)
20,636 posts reblogged (98%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@loststolenorstrayed
@hogmilked
@dykeonysus
@wingsandpetals
@purgatory-dracorn
I tagged 7,494 of my posts in 2022
#sci nonsense - 1,367 posts
#laugh tag - 684 posts
#pretty pictures - 671 posts
#portal - 369 posts
#research inquiry - 311 posts
#the queen carks it!! - 285 posts
#tf2 - 213 posts
#anonymous - 187 posts
#monsters - 180 posts
#mad science - 168 posts
Longest Tag: 138 characters
#i’ll keep making shitposts and the occasional emo todbit but you’re gonna have to ask if you want the continuation of the data point story
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
mad scientists should kiss each other and hold hands and go on gay little lab dates where they manifest an abomination beyond their gods’ comprehension send tweet
2,035 notes - Posted March 3, 2022
#4
i cackle maniacally and pull the switch. there’s the hum of electricity, followed by a massive crack and a flash of neon green light. when the smoke clears, everything is exactly the same as before but now i have a real nice set of honkers
2,426 notes - Posted March 24, 2022
#3
my dear, you are looking like an absolute biohazard!
4,983 notes - Posted April 7, 2022
#2
oh, you sweet little anomaly. my darling biohazard. beloved creature born of my own hands. my favorite, most brilliant specimen. allow me to study you.
8,180 notes - Posted January 20, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
pfffft, you call yourself a supervillain but you’re STILL using chrome? dumbass! everyone knows REAL evildoers switch to firefox!!
22,110 notes - Posted September 23, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
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Psychology of... Willow?
When I set out to do this series, I had a few episodes noted down where I would use the analysis of that post to look into one specific character and their psychology, writing, and the cinematography surrounding that character. For example, I still plan on my analysis of Labyrinth Runners delving into Gus.
But one such episode that I had noted down was Understanding Willow. I planned on examining its eponym's struggle with bullying and how that impacted her mental health.
But this episode is more complicated than that, and I'm not entirely sure that it's about Willow.
Let me explain.
SPOILERS AHEAD
One criticism of The Owl House is that it starts slow, and while my contrarian streak leads me to disagree with that, it is difficult to argue that the series doesn't abruptly gain speed with Understanding Willow. The animation, visual metaphors and storytelling, and the direction all skyrocket.
This is the episode where the series brings its complex storytelling to the forefront, and a key example of this is that this is about Amity as much as it is about Willow.
The premise of this episode is memory. What if memories are tangible? Maybe they are tampered with, or damaged? What if memories could be seen by others? What power does a picture have? Put a pin in this.
In February 2022, Steam Forge games released the Dark Souls Role Playing Game, and bear with me, I promise this is relevant. It is based off the Dark Souls series and the Dungeons and Dragons 5th Edition system. But I would argue that it pales in comparison to Emanuele Galletto's Dark Souls Unofficial Role-Playing Game.
Galletto's system is a fascinating take on the series it is based on, and is surprisingly balanced, but I'm not here to give a review. Instead, I would like to focus on the rules for humanity and their implications.
Essentially, because death and rebirth are common in the game, in order for stakes to mean anything, Galletto implemented an idea called Sparks of Memory. When a character dies, they lose their memories. These can be sacrificed in exchange for abilities upon level ups, or they can be established through the game and through the adventure itself.
"When you die, you lose a Spark of Memory: a piece of your being will be forever lost, and you will be a step closer to losing yourself... With time, you might become an entirely different person, driven by a strong will but completely changed by the trauma of death and reshaped by your journey throughout this accursed land."
This system is called Humanity, the passage above is taken from a page literally entitled "Loss of Humanity", which means something, right? But weirdly enough, this is a system that forces optimism. Pessimism and fear that the world will only get worse are not particularly good motivators. Anger and grief at specific moments are all well and good, but at the end of the day, when they leave your character, why are you still moving forwards? Hope.
When I was playing this, I genuinely watched the power of friendship develop into a major force in the campaign, as the characters reassured each other and formed these memories together. If memories are who you are, then people who remember you are equally important in keeping you in check. These were people who developed into relentlessly determined heroes, with a grim focus on making the world a better place, together.
I have never really cared about the science fiction debate of what constitutes humanity, but this is a genuinely interesting take on the question that I highly recommend experiencing yourself.
But why have I just spent almost 400 words talking about Dark Souls? Because Understanding Willow displays some of the same ideas. Memories are what makes Willow who she is, and when those get damaged, she runs into problems. What is fascinating, is how much of Willow's memories were formed in relation to others. Her fathers (hey, gay male representation in cartoons, don't see that often) feature often, but so does Amity.
Bullying is one of those almost universal experiences in life. If you haven't been a subject of it, you have probably witnessed it.
Studies have been trying to ascertain the impact of bullying on mental health since at least the 1970s, with the oldest source I could find being Dan Olweus' 1973 Victims and Bullies: Research on School Bullying, although that was written in Swedish, and I haven't been able to find a copy of that original book. It was allegedly published in English in 1978, retitled Aggression in the Schools: Bullies and Whipping Boys, of which the internet archive has a copy that is available.
Research into the subject has continued into the modern day and has been updated to modern scientific and psychological practices. For example, this study was published in 2021, and concluded that: "Reports of mental health problems were four times higher among boys who had been bullied compared to those not bullied. The corresponding figure for girls was 2.4 times higher."
What this means is that it is important to understand Willow in the context of Amity, and it is important for Amity to witness that effect directly in order to change herself.
Sorry, wrong image. How did that get in here? That's from a game called Melatonin, by the way.
There we go.
So, memories in the Owl House are tangible. They can be changed, or erased artificially, and "artificially" is the key word here, because memories can change naturally. A rare few people are infallible in that regard. But Willow is making an attempt to forget her life with Amity, she turns it away and avoids talking about it, rather than confront her past.
"That's my motto after all. Out of sight, out of mind."
It's notable that the illusion teacher governs the memory system, meaning that memories in this series use the same rules as the rest of illusion magic. I have another post going into detail about that, but TLDR: Illusions have an impact on real life in the same way that anything else can. They aren't representations of lies, but consequences. You can change yourself to match your true self, for example, but you need to understand what that means for everyone and everything around you.
So, memories associated with consequences? What a strange correlation, I wonder if that means anything.
You would think that the tragic memory would be of the bullying, right? A single moment crystalised into something awful, but what Willow wants to escape from, and what scares Amity the most, is the simple fact that these two used to be friends. It becomes a betrayal.
I think that the Inner Willow was a master stroke of the writing, because it gives agency to Willow's subconscious. It says the quiet things out loud in a way that Amity cannot get away from, and it is a creature that she will have to confront. It acts as a personification of consequence.
"Love, sadness, fear. I used to be a being made of all emotions. But ever since you set Willow's mind on fire, all I've been able to feel is anger."
There is a neat little double meaning here. Amity literally started burning Willow's memories of happiness accidentally, but she also did it figuratively a long time ago. The betrayal poisoned every other memory that Willow had of her and turned it sour, their relationship was shattered, perhaps permanently, and Willow suffered.
This actually links back to Galletto's Dark Souls. In the same passage where the mechanics are explained, Galletto gives this explanation:
"A Spark of Memory is something that keeps you human: funny thing is, they are rarely happy memories. Turns out pain, anger and regret take deep roots into our hearts, and the strength of these emotions can keep us going even when our body is broken"
Galletto isn't entirely false here, pain and suffering are powerful motivating forces, they can keep propelling you forwards. The Inner Willow would certainly agree with that sentiment. But I don't, and I don't think The Owl House as a whole, or even this episode, do either.
I mentioned above that gameplay displayed a contradicting view on powerful emotions, but Understanding Willow also argues this point. Anger is strong, don't get me wrong, but love can win out, and it does so through empathy. The thing that saves Willow in the end is Amity's declaration of understanding and desire to do better.
The strongest emotion that you will ever feel, is hope. Hope for a better tomorrow, hope for a better today, or hope that a relationship that you had thought doomed might be reconcilable. Hope will win out. Light, do not falter.
But, I said that this was an episode about Amity as well, and if you have seen this episode, you know exactly which scene I am going to talk about.
This scene pulls zero punches. From the fading away memories of young Amity and Willow to reveal their cynical, older selves; to the dialogue and the acting; to the construction of Amity's conversation with her parents. This is phenomenal.
This is the memory that started it all, this is the betrayal. Whoever did the expressions on the memories needs a prize because that is half of why this works so well. The other half of why this works is the lines, both what is said, and how it is delivered.
"I just... I just can't get the spells right"
"Well, yes. That... that is why. Because you're a weakling."
I keep saying this is a betrayal because it is. Friendships are built on trust and if that gets broken, good luck getting it back.
"Then you let your new friends pick on her, all because you thought she was weak."
It's important to understand what the Inner Willow is saying here. She's not complaining about the belittling or ambition, she's holding Amity accountable for her inaction. When Amity stood by and did nothing while Bosha bullied Willow, she was complicit in that bullying. Just because she didn't say anything doesn't make it any less her fault, for encouraging it by laughing, or by not standing up for Willow when she needed it.
Actions have consequences, but so does the choice to do nothing.
The camera pans back into the door and gives just a smidge of context, and there are some bold visual choices going on here.
First up, the limiting of the space makes amity feel boxed in and trapped, and it evokes a feeling of looking through a keyhole. You only see a fraction of what is going on, but it is enough to know what is happening.
Second, Amity is the only thing in colour here, meaning that she is still the centre point of the frame, despite being tiny.
Third, the Blights aren't shown in detail, only their shadows. It is their legacy that they leave behind on display, the shadows that they cast. But its also not the point. Showing the visual designs of the Blights would take away impact from what they are saying. This is a simple shot so that you understand exactly what is happening.
"Good children don't squabble, dear. Sever your ties with Willow, and if you don't..."
"Then we will."
Once again there is some reframing of Willow's life. Where Amity's betrayal tainted the memories of their times together, the Blights' words reframe everything after that point as out of her control.
"We'll make sure she never gets admitted into Hexide."
Amity is trying to protect Willow, and the actions that cause this episode's conflict become reframed as well. Amity wants Willow to forget her but doesn't comprehend how much of Willow's life was centred around her. She doesn't yet understand the consequences of her actions.
Final Thoughts
Willow and Amity are fascinating characters, and the depth that this episode brings to their actions and interactions sheds light on the series up to this point, and the series going forwards.
Willow has such a low level of self esteem that she is willing to hurt herself to support others, and this episode goes into why. But to that, I offer some advice. When I was researching this, I came across a motivational image by yogaspace.com. I had to search for the message's original source, which ended up being Penny Reid's Beard In Mind, but it reads as follows:
"Don’t set yourself on fire trying to keep others warm.”
Take from that what you will.
Next week, I will be looking at Enchanting Grom Fright, so stick around if you want my thoughts on that.
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What
"Since we haven't seen you since 2022, this appointment will be $45."
"I was here in September..."
"It's not in our system."
"Okay, here's proof I was here in September." *shows her my medical app on my phone*
"You sure this is the same place?"
"This building's address is on it. Also here's this" (shows a picture of me at the freakin appointment)
"Well without you in our system we can't be sure so you'll have to reschedule if you don't wanna pay the $45."
"It's not because of my insurance? I'm really confused as to why it wouldn't cover an appointment if it's been 'too long.' There are even some appointments I only get one free one per year of, so I'm very confused."
"Your insurance isn't in our system."
"How was my appointment paid for last time then?? Can I give you my information now??"
"It would be too late for the appointment if we did that, unfortunately."
"Ma'am..... I'm so sorry to do this. I don't like these accursed words to come out of my mouth. Can I.... speak to a higher up..."
*laughs* "No ma'am, I'm sorry."
"Great!"
and then I stormed out.
Look man it's not like I'm at a retail store. I'm trying to fix my fucking body. Yeah I phrased it in a way that she would laugh to make it less hostile but it still pissed me off. She was one of 4 receptionists and it wasn't that busy. "You can't be later than 15 minutes to your appointment" OK but i got to the appointment 10 minutes early and it's clearly not my fault that their system fucking sucks. I wasn't fucking late. The only reason I left instead of demanding to be seen is because I was gonna lose my shit. I have a hard time controlling what I say when I'm angry. So I'm complaining here instead
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