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syndxlla · 4 years

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part six of the Dinner and Diatribes series

part five here

summary: When you see Mando in action for the first time, you begin to recall more and more of your childhood memories.

word count: 4.7k words

warnings: Swearing, passing out, being shot at, Mando kills a guy, mentions of abuse.

a/n: “Be” is the tenth song on Hozier’s album Wasteland, Baby!

Sorry it’s been so long since I’ve updated! I got a little uh *cough* depressed *cough* but I’m feeling much better now, I also wanted to be present for all the holidays and didn’t want to be glued to my phone the whole time haha. ANYWAYS enjoy!!!

“Be”

“We need to refuel.” The Mandalorian said through the modulator. This time, it wasn’t a lie. The three of you were a little less than halfway to Kiros, travelling through hyperspace for almost a full day now. It had been a few hours since the kiss, enough time for the kid to wake up, eat, and play enough to get tired again. He was nestled sleepily on your lap, mindlessly fidgeting with the beskar ball you gave back to him to occupy to little squirt while you sat in the cockpit with Mando. You think the bounty hunter slept while you were down in the Hull taking care of kid. It made you wonder how he ever got rest when he was alone with the monster.

“Already?” You ask, finding it hard to believe you already needed fuel. After you spoke up, the kid drowsily babbled, slowly getting more fatigued.

The Mandalorian nodded. “She’s onto me,” He said to himself. He couldn’t lie to you again, the truth would get back to you eventually, and it would be best to keep it as accurate as possible. “Should be fast.” He explained.

“That’s alright.” You shrug, you didn’t mind, and it’s not like you could change the course. You remind yourself that he does what he wants.

“We’ll stop on Uyter, it was just liberated by the New Republic a few years ago, so it’ll be pretty dangerous.” He began after clicking a few random buttons, “Feel up to the challenge?” Mando asked, the slightest bit of teasing in his voice.

“Oh I’ll be fine. You’re the one we need worry about.” You sighed, sarcastically playing along.

He very lightly chuckled, “We’ll see about that.”

You smirked. Neither of you have brought up the kiss yet, between being occupied with the kid and not wanting to ruin the lingering magic of it, you both made a silent agreement to leave the moment alone. Every time you thought of it, however, you received a wave of shocks through your body, causing your spine to shiver in euphoric bliss. You hoped it wouldn’t be the last time he kissed you. However, you didn’t want to get your hopes up, as far as you know, that was just a short moment of weakness for him. But his words lingered on your mind, “that’s how you can help”. His remark after kissing you implied that it would happen again, but you were still walking on egg-shells in every situation with him. He would have to be the one to make the move every time, you were too timid to be the one to initiate any form of physical contact.

It wasn’t much longer before you were snapping out of light speed, a small but lush planet in your view. “Utter?” You raise an eyebrow, the kid now asleep in your arms.

“Uyter. You-ter.” He enunciated.

“I’m sorry, could you say that again?” You ask, poking your tongue to your cheek, enjoying teasing him far too much.

“No.” He grunted, making you quietly giggle.

“Have you been here before?” This was one of your favorite things to ask him, it was so interesting to hear about his adventures through the galaxy.

He nodded in response, “Capital City has a good Cantina, found a bounty there once.”

Cantina meant actual food, which made you happy.

“So, how dangerous is this place.” You try to ask nonchalantly, like you didn’t really care how dangerous it might be (but you did care, a lot).

“The empire used to have an academy here, a pretty big one too. It’s been dismantled now, but there are still remnants.”

“There are all over the galaxy.” You sigh. The Empire was even able to reach out to Nal Hutta at some points.

The Razor Crest moved into the atmosphere, and before you knew it, the Mandalorian’s ship landed on the surface. The descent was boring, and all you could see for miles and miles was farmland.

“They used to produce food for the Empire, one of my first missions with the Mandalorian’s was to burn the fields.” He explained.

“What? I thought you bucket-heads were neutral when it came to imperial affairs.” You tilt your head as you ask.

“We are, but if the price is right, we’ll work for anyone...”

“How old were you?”

“...Eighteen. I think, not sure about how hold I really am.” Mando cleared his throat, something told you that you are the only person he’s ever told something like that. “It was me and some of my brothers of the creed... I’m the only one of that troupe still alive...” You swear you could hear a little bit of sadness in his voice, but it was hard to tell. You thought you were getting better at reading him, but he’s so mechanical from the outside, it makes you wonder what he’s really thinking. In no way do you want to seem invasive, and the last thing you want to do is offend him, but you couldn’t help yourself from wanting to know more about him, to be...closer to him in some way.

“I-I’m sorry. Let’s just be fast then, yeah?” You reassured.

Capital city was nice, much nicer than Nal Hutta. It was a relatively large city, bigger than any city on your home-world. You were significantly closer to the inner-rim as well, which meant more wealth, prosperity and civilization. You knew this, but that didn’t stop your childlike awe as you looked up at the towering skyscrapers above.

Mando noticed the way you looked up at the sky, “Two hyperspace lanes cross here, we’ll be moving onto the other one after we leave, getting us closer to Kiros.” He spoke up.

“Can we eat here?” You shamelessly ask. He nods in response as he powers down the ship, and stands up from the pilot’s chair.

Uyter was just like Junkfort station but on the surface, bustling and diverse, but running with more crime than the space station. Mando payed a few credits to the Rodian crew at the docking bay, and the three of you were off. The kid was nestled safely in a metal pram, the lid sealed shut, keeping the outside world from distracting him (and vice versa). The carriage followed you, who followed Mando as the trio walked into the heart of the city. This was the first real city you’ve ever been in (that you can remember). And you knew that this was a significantly smaller city than anything on the core worlds. The galaxy was so big, so much bigger than your little shack on the bayou. As you weaved through the winding streets and pop-up shops, you wanted to attach to the bounty hunter at the hip. Although you were mesmerized by the higher level of civilization, you didn’t feel safe, and you knew he would protect you. You remember that this is what every planet is like, every city. They all have a crime rate, they all have dark alleyways and bounty hunters and remnants of the Empire. You’re sure Lothal wasn’t much different from here. Men of all types of species watched as you and the metal man walked through the crowded streets, the hordes of people seemed to part at your expense. It gave you a sense of fulfillment, a feeling of power. When you were seen with the Mandalorian, you were seen as a threat, too. As far as any of these strangers know, you are just as intimidating as a bounty hunter in a beskar shell. In reality, you were nothing more than a naive girl with no childhood and the only useful experience you have has come from a cantina owner and abusive ex-boyfriend on a planet ran by massive slugs. But none of these people needed to know that. That was something you could definitely get used to; in the rest of the galaxy, no one knew your name. It was like a fresh start, and you could become anyone you wanted to be. Hell, you could even become a Mandalorian if you wanted, but life inside of a can isn’t very appealing to you. You hardly know how to shoot a blaster anyways, so maybe life as a bounty hunter isn’t the one for you. You could accept that.

Mando wandered into the Cantina. It was about mid-day, so it wasn’t too busy yet. A few droids worked behind the counter and there were a handful of aliens quietly conversing. The three of you found a place to sit at the bar, and you timidly pulled out some of the credits the Mandalorian gave you a few days ago. “Get something for the kid.” His voice quiet through the modulator.

You nodded before ordering some generic and cheap food from one of the droids. You pull the pram forward before unlatching the lid, letting the little monster see outside again. His eyes adjusted to the light, and turned to look up at you.You hand him the food you gt, and he was immediately happy to be eating. Something about him being a glutton was so cute to you. You hoped he was getting enough to eat, that Mando was taking good care of him. You still have so many questions about who the little monster is and where he came from. How had the Mandalorian came into possession of the kid? What species was he? You know they haven’t been together for very long, but you do know that it’s been long enough that they have a very special bond. Almost like father and son.

You mindlessly ate your food, completely unaware that something might’ve been wrong. You were so used to the silence bounty hunter at your side was so comfortable with that you didn’t think twice when he sat completely still, his visor facing straight forward. “Gotta go.” He said so quietly he might as well have stayed silent.

“What?”

“Hurry.” He cleared his throat. You were confused, but were too afraid to ask what was going on, so you quickly helped the kid finish eating.

“All right let’s-” You began to say but was interrupted.

“Now how did the guild let you get away with that?” A deep and dangerous voice said from behind you. You froze up, and darted your eyes over to Mando, side-eyeing him. You slowly move your hand back to close the metal case holding the kid. It snapped closed at the touch of your finger, slightly startling you with the noise it made. “Heard you’re the most wanted member right now...” The voice from behind you said again, Mando stayed perfectly still and collected, almost like he knew this was coming. He was so good at his job that he probably did, you remind yourself. You looked to him for reassurance again, and he slightly nodded before quickly turning around and drawing his gun, shooting the man behind you two in the leg. He yelled out in pain and you jumped in shock. You stayed frozen in place as the other patrons in the Cantina all stopped what they were doing to look at the scene. The loud blast from the gunfire had silenced the semi-busy establishment, and the only sound was the thud of the man falling on the floor in pain. You turned to look down at him in shock, he wasn’t dead, Mando wasn’t trying to kill him, but the sight of his blood put a pit in your stomach, like you could puke.

“Mando-” You swallowed thickly.

“Hey! Take that outside!” An alien yelled from across the room.

The man on the floor writhed in pain but somehow pulled together enough strength to pull his own blaster out and point it at not Mando, but you. You weren’t sure what do to, and thank the maker the Mandalorian noticed what was happening and acted quickly. He bent down to grab the gun from his hand right before the shot was fired, ripping it out of his grasp and shooting the guy in the head with it instead. As you held your breath, your eyebrows slowly started to knit together, processing what had happened. The murder caused the other patrons of the bar to get rowdy, no one wanted to see that but something told you that this wasn’t the first time.

“I said let’s go.” Mando repeated himself as he dropped the blaster he stole and grabbed your hand, pulling you towards the door. A few people surrounded the man and it wasn’t much longer until yelling could be heard.

“Who was that?” You timidly ask as the bounty hunter tugs you into the street.

“Not sure, but I didn’t like how much he knew about me.”

“Knew about you? He hardly knew anything!” You contradict, trying not to go into a state of shock.

“He knew enough, he knew that I’m wanted in the guild and he knew about you and the kid.”

“Me?”

“If I had let him live, your face would’ve gotten out, you’d never be able to stay in one place for very long.” He explained. The pit in your stomach only seemed to grow.

“You aren’t getting away that easily!” A new voice yelled from down the street, the noise causing Mando to move into a light jog, yanking you forward with him. A few blaster shots were sent in your direction, and it took everything in you not to scream. It had been a long time since you had been shot at. Mando pulled the three of you into a side alley, pushing you up against a brick wall and pulling out his own blaster. He held the weapon up by his helmet and turned his head to look around the corner of the wall, lowering the gun and firing a few shots back. As he worked, you turned to metal cradle and opened it to make sure the kid was alright. As the lid snapped open, big, beady eyes looked up at you, completely unaware of the situation at hand.

“You okay?” You ask before giving an awkward smile of reassurance and closing the case again. You took a deep breath, trying to calm your heart rate. “Can I help?” You as the Mandalorian, who like usual ignored you. “I’ll take that has a no.” Before you could decompress again, he was turning and grabbing your wrist again. The chase continued down the alley, and you were able to make good time before you were being shot at again. Your mouth was dry, and you began to get tired of all the running. Mando must have noticed this because he pulled your arm forward so you were in front of him and he could shield you with his body, the carriage following closely behind. You tried to lead but the alley way led to a dead-end, and suddenly, you were cornered. “Shit, what now?” You turn to ask him. He was already turned around and shooting back at the people chasing you. It was the first time you had really seen him in action, and you had to admit, he was good at it. He took down one, two, three of the people against you, making it look easy, effortless. You stared at him in awe, you knew he would be good at this, you’ve seen Mandalorians in action before, but he was... different. Everything he did had a purpose, the way he moved was like a strictly choreographed dance, and it practically put you in a trance.

More men were coming, and you genuinely wondered how you were going to get out of this. Soon, the shots stopped, but men gathered on the rooftops around the dead-end. You looked up at them in fear, Mando’s helmet tilted up too. “How are we getting out of this?” You muttered, asking out of genuine concern for your life.

“Don’t worry about it.” He responded.

“Oh yeah, twenty men are pointing blasters at me from all directions, I’ll stay calm.” You sarcastically reply. Before you could really think to get scared though, Mando was taking a step behind him in your direction, bumping into you as he was cocking his wrist back. Two dozen small missiles shot from his wrist guard, all of them flying in different directions and hitting man after man, causing them to fall to their deaths as a whistle of power shot towards them. You close your eyes and push into his back, not wanting to see the pain of so many people. The sounds of yelling and pain filled your ears and it was almost like you were dreaming as your memories began to flood to view. “Not here, not now.” You whisper to yourself when you start to recall things from your childhood again.

Like you said, it had been a long time since you were shot at, and the last time you were involved a ship, an old one, one you hadn’t seen since you were little. You memories flashed before your eyes: a man in full armor pointing his gun at you, his voice rough with a thick accent, it was a voice you had heard before. The sight of an explosion in the distance, a man with blaring red swords being flown from a building. A girl flying, you were in her arms, was she wearing a Mandalorian helmet? You weren’t sure, although the memories were vivid, you were getting dizzy and tired. The unfamiliar face of the woman holding you as you flew towards the rafters of a building was becoming blurry, and her helmed face slowly turned into the Mandalorian’s who you were travelling with. You regained your vision for just one more short moment and you saw you were down on the ground looking up at Mando’s. After that, you slowly faded into unconsciousness.

When you woke up, you were back in the Hull of the Crest, your sore back and pounding head lay against the Mandalorian’s rough cot. All the lights were off, and you could tell you were back in hyperspace. Why had this happened again? You were still sick to your stomach, and probably should have gone back to sleep, but scooted out of the bed instead. You rub the sleep from your eyes, and drowsily made your way to the ladder to the cockpit. You slowly climb up it, carefully working not to fall off, you were still very dizzy and weren’t sure of what happened after you regained some of your memories. You eventually made it up the ladder, and knocked one time on the cockpit door before going on. The Mandalorian sat in the pilots chair like usual, his head leaned back against the read rest, sitting perfectly still. In his arms was the kid, sleeping comfortably in the protection of a strong embrace. He was drooling just a little bit onto the bounty hunter’s elbow. You smiled warmly at the image, and assumed he was asleep too. Not wanting to bother his rest, you sat in one of the extra chairs, pulling one of your legs up onto the seat and holding it there with your arms, resting your forehead against your knee. You sat there comfortable for a long time, not sleeping, but just contently enjoying some peace and quiet. If Mando had been awake, he would have said something by now to let you know. It gave you a moment to process what had just happened, and the memories you had possibly regained. They were so vivid it almost felt like you were watching a holorecording, which is why you are so confused on what was real and what wasn’t. Is it possible that all of this was an elaborate mirage? Something your mind was making up to fill in the blanks? Your childhood was a complete mystery up until a few days ago, so what about this experience has triggered your memories to come back?

“You feeling okay?” His modulated voice startled you, and you lifted your head up to see his helmet turned in your direction.

“I-I’m sorry,” Your voice was hoarse, you cleared your throat after speaking. “I’m sorry I’ve been such a burden on you. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I’ve never had anything like this happen before.” You admit, trying to explain what was going on. “If you want to leave me on Kiros I understand-”

“Stop.”

“What?” you raise an eyebrow.

“Stop. I don’t care, I’m just glad to see you up and moving.” He sighed.

“Oh?” You eyes widened.

“I don’t think it’s safe for you to be out of the ship, both times you have been this has happened.”

“I know, that’s why I’m saying sorry-”

“It’s not your fault, you’ve spent your whole life isolated, the galaxy can be... overwhelming.”

You thought about what he said, “Why are you being so kind to me?” You timidly speak up. He was a dangerous man, so what had you done to gain his favor?

He shrugged, “Can’t just leave you behind.”

“Yes you could, you’re a dangerous bounty hunter and I’m just... just-”

“The only person to treat me like a man.” He interrupted you.

“Huh?” You weren’t sure if you heard him correctly.

“Everyone treats me as just that: a dangerous bounty hunter. But you didn’t, you looked me in the eyes when you spoke to me, you weren’t afraid to tell me no. I’ll admit, it’s pretty frustrating to not get everything I want when I ask the first time, but I wouldn’t have ever known that if you hadn’t come along.” He explained.

“Oh... you’re welcome? I guess.” You shrugged, not really sure how to respond. “But really, if I’m too much of a burden, you don’t have to keep me around, I don’t mind.” You reassured. He lightly chuckled, “No offense, but you wouldn’t last very long on your own.”

“Hey now.” You teased back, while you understood he wasn’t serious, you knew there was some truth behind what he was saying. “So.. you’re okay with me staying?” You asked after smiling.

“If you want, after Kiros I’ll still take you to Lothal, hopefully by then you won’t faint at any minor inconvenience.” He tilted his head, this one made you roll your eyes, but you still smiled at what he said.

“Sounds like you want me to stick around, too.” You raise an eyebrow.

The Mandalorian didn’t respond to this, and instead turned his head down to look at the sleeping kid on his arm. You followed him with your eyes, your chest filling with warmth as you watched the dangerous man’s fatherly instincts. Somewhere in there, there was a man, and you were determined to find him.

“How close are we to Kiros?” You finally ask, interrupting the comfortable silence.

“Still a few rotations, get comfortable, we aren’t going to need fuel any time soon.” Mando nodded. Sometimes it was so easy to make conversation with him, but a lot of the time he was like a brick wall: impossible to break through. This entire journey you were walking on egg-shells, trying to stay on his good side and prove that you were worth his time. However, at the end of the day, you were only human, and after years of almost complete isolation, constant companionship is starting to sound nice, even if it’s just for a few weeks. You slouch in your seat, letting your foot fall back to the metal ground. You stared up at the glass overhead, admiring the swirl of light speed. You can’t remember if you had ever been in hyperspace as a child, everything is so unclear. At least you thought it was. Now you were unsure. You spent over twenty years being completely content with your lack of childhood, it rarely crossed your mind. As you recall, you remember that there were only a few instances in which you felt like you were missing something. Once when a mother helped her child off of a speeder, and another time when you watched future bounty hunters and criminals play with a ball. You don’t remember ever having friends growing up, but seeing kids interact with each other before they become corrupt from a galaxy of bad made you long for what could have been. If you made it this far without wanting more, why do you suddenly want to now?

“I think I know why I’ve been passing out.” You say, cursing yourself after. He probably didn’t care, you didn’t think before you spoke and now you’ve sprung your own trap. He tilted his head after you spoke, urging you to go on. You took a deep breath, maybe he had some answers, it doesn’t hurt to try and find out. “Growing up on Hutta, I never remembered much...” You began, unsure of how to even go about this. “I would forget simple things, like names or times...” You shrug, considering you were a literal child, you suppose it didn’t matter much. “I know I wasn’t always on that planet, there’s a chapter to my story before then... but no matter how hard I try, I can’t remember what it was.” You sigh. You felt silly, but he didn’t tell you to stop, and something about the situation convinced you to keep talking, “That was until a few days ago... when you mentioned the war.” You cleared your throat after you said this. “I don’t know, it must’ve triggered something in my memory because now... now I’m starting to remember things, strange things, but they’re incredibly vivid.” You wanted to shrink, could he at least confirm he was listening to you? “Both times I’ve... passed out... it was because I remembered something.” A wash of relief flooded your body when you finished speaking, whatever happened next was in his hands. You looked over to him, hopeful that he would respond. You bring your fist to your mouth, waiting in suspense for his response. “Say something, say something, say something...” You think silently to yourself.

“What did you see?” He said, you felt like you could sing after he spoke up, thankful he was even listening.

“Gun fire, bright lights, a helmet that looked like yours...” You listed out, trying to remember all the things you saw, “Flying up towards rafters, a man yelling at me, his voice was familiar...” You recall, thinking hard about the memories. “And the strangest thing was a man with red swords? I know that sounds ridiculous. I had a dream about it once before, but I was very sick, the doctor on Nal Hutta told me I had a fever and that’s why I was having strange dreams but now I’m not so sure.” You falter off as you speak, you probably sound crazy. Mando didn’t reply, you hoped he was absorbing what you had just said. “I know it sounds crazy but I don’t know what to do and until I figure out what’s going on I’m gonna continue to faint at any minor inconvenience.” You finish on a lighter note, hoping to take some of the tension off the mood. He still didn’t respond, and you sighed in defeat. You should have known this would happen. You shift in your seat, and try to fall back asleep, if you’re lucky you could get another hour or two in. So you were relieved when you began to dream about a mysterious boy softly kissing you, telling you everything will be alright. You just wish you could believe him.

#din djarin #din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #the mandalorian #the mandalorian x reader #reader insert #Smut #fluff #din djarin fluff #star wars #fan fiction #reader fanfiction #pedro pascal

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ryttu3k · 3 years

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Part 2 of my season 12 reaction posts! Find part 1 (Resolution of the Daleks to Fugitive of the Judoon) here!

Praxeus

Thoughts on Doctor Who - Praxeus!

OKAY FIRST. THANK YOU, SHOW, FOR FIXING A BIG ISSUE I HAD WITH THE FIRST SEASON. So they were doing a thing where they’d introduce incidentally queer characters, have a female character mention her wife, stuff like that, only for them to die. This episode had Jake and Adam, married/separated/it’s complicated couple, who face huge amounts of danger, who both come close to dying, but who survive! And have a Big Damn Kiss! And walk off together holding hands! They survived!!

Plotwise, I enjoyed it a ton while watching, although in retrospect it did feel a bit free of danger. The companions were never in true peril because the Doctor can home in on them automatically, and we never got the true scale of the risk of infection, since the only people we saw get infected were in isolated areas. I would have liked to see, for instance, the threat of Praxeus spreading beyond just the very Hitchcockian birds; all of the peril was on an individual level.

Good message, if unsubtle. Mind you, that’s kind of Doctor Who’s thing, and it pisses off conservatives, so all for it, really XD (They must have loved the core relationship in this episode, too!) Like. Subtle doesn’t work. There are literally climate change deniers that exist. Sometimes you actually do have to tell a message with all the finesse of a sledgehammer because .

(Side note, I was deeply concerned when I saw the cowriter was the guy who did the hot mess that was Kerblam!, so at least this was just an unsubtle and kind of questionably written story instead of an actively harmful one.)

The companions: Ryan seems a fair bit more confident on his own? His initial scenes with Gabriela showed that he’s starting to work well even without backup, and picking up the bird proved to be a damn good call. Yaz and Graham were a fun pair, and Yaz got a lot to do when she and Gabriela (again!) got to explore, and I can definitely understand the conflict between curiosity/doing what’s right and safety when it came to the teleport scene. She does seem to be bordering on the reckless. Intriguing!

Minor plot snag - Graham knows how to set up an IV, presumably because of the shitload of time he spent in hospital! …And yet he doesn’t know what a pathogen is?

Friend note!

“fun fact about graham seemingly not knowing what a pathogen is! in my reading of the scene, i saw it as graham knowing what one was. with "Well, I’m glad you asked that…!” he seems like he’s actually sort of pleased with himself, like he’s about to launch into an explanation, and then IIRC there’s a very brief shot at Ryan giving him a Look and Graham immediately changes tone to “…cause I didn’t want to look stupid.” he immediately changes from boosting his own ego to bolstering ryans and im love"

In which case, good shit gooood shit.

SFX - the infection was creepy as shit. The very obviously puppet bird near the lab was hilariously bad.

Apparently the filming was tricky because it was super windy so all the shorts of Thirteen with her hair Like That weren’t planned, it just kind of happened. Love a fluffy ruffled Thirteen.

So anyway. People calling for more plot focus - literally this is the Doctor trying to distract herself and not focus on the plot! This is her avoidance tactic! Emotional honesty? Who’s she? She’ll get back to it eventually, but for now she needs a distraction after being punched in the emotions. Give her that for one episode, c'mon.

Ryan: “…I do a lot of running.”

Graham: “Whatever is giving off those weird readings… is on the other side of that wall!” Yaz: *silently turns scanner around* Graham, not skipping a beat: “…is on the other side of that door!”

Yaz: “I don’t want you to panic, but… we followed one of those things through a teleport and now I think we’re on an alien planet.” Thirteen: “…well, you don’t do things by halves!”

Thirteen: “That’s why you smell of dead bird! I thought you’d changed your shower gel.”

Thirteen: “I’m having half a thought. Ooh, this one tickles!”

Thirteen: “What can I say? I’m a romantic~”

In conclusion, Doctor Who said gay rights.

Can You Hear Me?

Thoughts on Doctor Who - Can You Hear Me?

Trigger warning for discussion of depression and suicide.

You know you're in for a wild ride when iView warns for horror themes instead of science fiction themes.

Overall: at first impression, it felt sort of mashed together? There's 14th century Aleppo, and there's 21st century Sheffield, and there's a deep space station, and there's creepy monsters and dream villains; I do kind of wonder why Zellin targeted a random girl in Aleppo as source for his pet monster, although targeting people like Ryan's best friend makes sense if he's deliberately trying to lure the Doctor to him.

The theme, on the other hand, of mental health resiliance and reaching out, was done incredibly well. Oh yeah there'll be more comments about it - the Guardian described it as 'adventures in Wokeness' - but damn, sometimes you need to hear it. I loved getting more of Yaz' backstory, about being a desperate teenage runaway at the point of being suicidal, and her reunion with the older woman legitimately made me tear up.

But like, goddamn. Her nightmare - she's still hearing that. She's still hearing her sister saying that she should "do it right this time" and that this time she won't call and that no one is coming and holy fuck. God this makes so many of Yaz' scenes incredibly painful in retrospect, knowing that she was at that point only three years before and that she's still dreaming that shit! It makes her recklessness terrifying!

Ryan's nightmare, and his experience with Tibo - it's quite reflective of the Doctor, too. She wasn't there, and Gallifrey burnt. And Ryan is realising this now, and really thinking about the potential future in Orphan 55. I think this is absolutely foreshadowing Ryan leaving at the end of the season (there's been a lot of speculation given Tosin's new TV role), and I think Ryan and Yaz' discussion at the end of the episode was a definite hint in the direction of Ryan choosing to going back to Earth.

Would have really liked Graham, during his talk with the Doctor, to gently remind her that she can talk about her own problems, although I can understand the narrative choice on why she didn't (although, yeah, would have been good for Graham to ask). Because, yeah, if anyone needs a sympathetic ear (...sans fingers) or a shoulder to lean on, it's her!! The entire theme of this episode was like... reaching out. Conquering your fears with the help of others. Sharing your fears to lessen them. Getting help. And the Doctor deliberately... not doing that makes it into an actual Thing that I think is going to seriously be addressed by the end of the season.

It's been such an ongoing theme. A bunch of episodes have started with an obviously depressed Doctor. The Fam has tried to raise the issue multiple times and have discussed it amongst themselves even more. Scenes like Yaz' reaction after being abducted in Spyfall (...which makes her, "I thought I was dead" part even more worrying) and being comforted by Ryan, not the Doctor... her whole reaction to Graham being like, "I'm glad you talked to me but I literally can't do the same in return" - if it's not addressed by the end of this season, it's at least going to have to be an ongoing theme, because it's becoming very deliberate now.

An interesting note: the actor who played Zellin (an immortal manipulator of nightmares) also voiced the Remnants (who were the first to mention the Timeless Child in The Ghost Monument). Coincidence or deliberate?

Assorted thoughts:

"I'm still quite socially awkward." There's socially awkward and there's emotionally repressed... (I saw a description of it on Tumblr as 'weaponised dissociation' and... yeah. And also yikes.) Also the way she was so closed in on herself, basically hugging her arms to her body! On a semi-related note, talking to herself in Aleppo was a bit depressing. Like it's continuing the theme of The Doctor Does Not Like Being Alone.

The finger thing - ew ew ew ew it's in their EARS ewww D:

Stylistic comment: the traditionally-styled animation for the Immortals' game was gorgeous.

"Try not freak out, yeah, but you're on a floating space platform trapped in a gravitational pull between two colliding planets."

"Thanks for lending a helping hand!" Companions just being, "...Doctor p l s."

On an old lore note, loved the callback to Eternals, Guardians, and the Toymaker! On a concerning note, man, the Doctor has so many issues with immortals. They abandoned Jack, there was the punishment they gave the Family of Blood, they had those Issues with Ashildr (from what I've read), now this, an eternal punishment with no chance of redemption, perhaps because she knows what immortality does? Parallels with the Doctor as quasi-immortal too, which Zellin even pointed out.

"You're wrong about humans. They're not pathetic. They're magnificent. They live with their fears, doubts, guilt. They face them down everyday and they prevail. That's not weakness. That's strength. That's what humanity is."

(Contrast: "That's what humanity is." The Doctor isn't human. She's not prevailing against her fears, doubts, and guilt.)

In conclusion, literally everyone but the creepy immortals needs a hug.

The Haunting of Villa Diodati

Thoughts on Doctor Who - The Haunting Of Villa Diodati!

tfw you think you're just going to get a nice spoopy historical and instead get major plot?

Overall impression: Well, Jack is going to be pretty miffed, given that the Doctor had to do precisely what he didn't want to happen - giving the Lone Cyberman what it wanted. To save Shelley, and also to save the future, although that does bring up the question on if the death of one person can rewrite the future, why doesn't that apply to literally everyone? Fletcher the valet and Elise the nurse died too, do their deaths have the same impact? Either way, the Doctor takes the Cyberium for herself - then realises that the Cybermen are inevitable, and returns it. And now she's trying to go and stop them. So... a bit conflicting in the message there, I think.

Yeah. Bit of a Trolley Problem there.

The characters were really fun. I did enjoy seeing Mary's sense of morbidness, but also her kindness and sympathy towards the Cyberman; you can see the foundations of Frankenstein there. I'm seeing some criticism of how Byron was portrayed as a coward, but eh. Nice little callback to Ada. Also I love how one of the rules was 'no one snog Byron'. Put that dirty boy back, you don't know where he's been! Glad Claire realised that too, although historically, she was already pregnant with his daughter at that point (and that didn't go well at all)... Either way. Good display of all these bright young reckless things.

(And yes, they were young. Byron was the eldest at 28. Shelley was 23, Polidori was 20, Mary and Claire were just 18. And while Claire lived to 80 and Mary to her 50s, the three men all died young, too - Byron at 36, Shelley at 29 - yes, from drowning, Polidori at just 25. Also wasn't mentioned that Polidori also created something on that Dark And Stormy Night along with Mary's Frankenstein - he wrote The Vampyre, the first modern vampire story!)

The Lone Cyberman (and I am deliberately using that instead of 'Ashad') - creepy as shit. Not just the whole Frankenstein look, but the way he acted! Not emotionless and blank, but actively manipulative and sadistic! Mary showed empathy and he actively threw it back in her face! I mean, yikes.

House was terrific and also spooky as hell. (Am lowkey miffed that no one went "VIBE CHECK!") The jumbled layout was quite Castrovalva, and I actually really dig that Graham got to see some actual ghosts. Ghostly sandwiches!

I think we got actual confirmation here that Yaz does have feelings for the Doctor? (Bleeding Cool News is pretty sure that it was for Ryan, but... lmao no.) BBCA twitter certainly thinks so!

Claire: "His answers only increase the enigma." Yaz: "I know someone like that." Claire: "This enigmatic person of yours... would you trade them for reliable and dull?" Yaz: "My person's a bit different..."

I MEAN.

(It got deleted. So. There is that.)

Thirteen: "Hmm. Fourteenth... no. Fifteenth century... touch more umami." (Doctor, have you been playing Detroit: Become Human again?)

Mary: "I don't think they're really from the colonies!" Byron: "No, she... is from somewhere much, much stranger." Polidori: "The North."

Thirteen: "YOU HAD ONE JOB."

Cyberman: "You appear courageous. But your vital signs betray a heightened state of anxiety." Thirteen: "Or as I like to call it... Tuesday."

Thirteen: "Yeah, 'cause sometimes this team structure isn't flat. It's mountainous, with me at the summit, in the stratosphere, alone. Left to choose. Save the poet, save the universe. Watch people burn now, or tomorrow. Sometimes even I can't win."

Claire: "You pursued Mrs Doctor without a care for my presence, belittled my thoughts and opinions... and then proceeded to use my person as a human shield." Byron: "...And?" Claire: "And the spell is broken... my lord." Polidori's face: "haha you fucked up dude"

Next week: Shit Hits The Fan.

Ascension of the Cybermen

In lieu of a proper post for Ascension of the Cybermen, here are a list of questions we need an answer for.

Will Graham and Yaz survive, on a giant carrier full of Cybermen?

Who is Brendan, and what is his relevance to the story?

What is the Boundary?

How is Gallifrey in the Boundary?

How was the Master in Gallifrey, and not trapped by the Kasaavin?

Who is Ko Sharmus and why am I getting Yana vibes?

Who is Ashad and what is his story? (And why is his theme such a literal banger?)

Is he an actual Cyberman? Because I'm totally getting this impression he's human in armour?

How did Brendan survive being shot, and why did his non-ageing father and mentor do that?

Why did it look like a chameleon arch?

Is Ethan's tech-savvy just warzone familiarity or something more sinister?

Are there any other large human populations left?

Was I detecting a hint of romantic tension between Graham and Ravio?

What's up with Yaz?

Why did the Cyberium get sent to that time period?

Who or what is this alliance Jack is a part of?

How do the Time Lords and the lie of the Timeless Child come into it?

WHO THE FUCK IS BRENDAN?

The Timeless Children

WELL THEN.

While I gather proper thoughts on The Timeless Children, here are the questions I had from Ascension of the Cybermen, now with answers!

Will Graham and Yaz survive, on a giant carrier full of Cybermen?

Yup! Disguises for the win!

Who is Brendan, and what is his relevance to the story?

Brendan is a filtered overlay memory of one of the Doctor's former lives.

What is the Boundary?

An anomaly, as far as I can tell.

How is Gallifrey in the Boundary?

No idea!

How was the Master in Gallifrey, and not trapped by the Kasaavin?

No idea!

Who is Ko Sharmus and why am I getting Yana vibes?

A big damn hero.

Who is Ashad and what is his story? (And why is his theme such a literal banger?)

We're still not actually sure. Either way, he's an action figure now.

Is he an actual Cyberman? Because I'm totally getting this impression he's human in armour?

Yeah, sort of.

How did Brendan survive being shot, and why did his non-ageing father and mentor do that?

Because Time Lords.

Why did it look like a chameleon arch?

It's probably related technology! If the chameleon arch rewrites memories, this one just wipes them.

Is Ethan's tech-savvy just warzone familiarity or something more sinister?

Just warzone familiarity. Poor li'l bean.

Are there any other large human populations left?

Possibly! If the Boundary really did send them to random places, there still could be surviving pockets elsewhere in the universe.

Was I detecting a hint of romantic tension between Graham and Ravio?

Maybe a bit XD And now they're all on Earth, who knows?

What's up with Yaz?

Who knows?

Why did the Cyberium get sent to that time period?

Ko Sharmus sent it. Didn't send it far enough.

Who or what is this alliance Jack is a part of?

Same organisation Ko Sharmus is part of. Also, young!Ko Sharmus/Jack please.

How do the Time Lords and the lie of the Timeless Child come into it?

In so many ways.

WHO THE FUCK IS BRENDAN?

The Doctor!

More thoughts later!

Thoughts on Doctor Who - The Timeless Children.

...Actually, first thought is the title. Timeless Children? Hmm.

Anyway. That is... sure a literally mind-blowing revelation for the Doctor, yes! Like, damn, the discovery that you're not even the species you thought you were, that your adoptive parent spent lifetimes abusing and experimenting on you, that your memories were routinely erased by people you thought you could trust (including your adoptive parent), that you're literally the progenitor for your entire species, that you've lost who knows how much time and who knows how many memories... yeah. Damn.

What's an appropriate birthday present for someone turning ten million?

Also, huh. Amidst all the old lore and casual mentions (like Borusa!) that got mentioned - were they taking hints from the Cartmel master plan? About the Doctor being some kind of founding figure for Gallifrey? Not exactly written as Cartmel had it, but that big main concept of the Doctor as a sort of... foundation piece of Time Lord culture was still actually there.

Brain of Morbius Doctors confirmed, I guess. I guess even Four was going, "...the fuck?"

Cybermen = still scary. Regenerating Cybermen = felt somehow obscene. Like, no, that's just fundamentally not right. Like the TARDIS responding to Jack by noping the fuck out kind of not right. God. And the Master was completely and utterly magnificently batshit, like, more than usual, come on, dude, you know they'd kill or convert you the second you turned your back.

Still. Deeply, deeply entertaining to watch just from a villain perspective, completely Chaotic, and like... I do understand where he was coming from? His entire life is a lie. His entire life is because of the Doctor, who, I think it's fair to say, he has Complicated Feelings regarding. (Their entire interaction this episode was a giant power play. Like damn guys just get into BDSM and leave the would-be genocide and universal takeover.)

Tecteun = Rassilon, I'm assuming. Goddamn. Like they were a pompous abusive asshole from the outset, this just kind of makes it worse. I also wonder if Rassilon chose the Master specifically to get the drums because he was friends with the Doctor? That actually may have been something the Master worked out himself, too. I mean, I'd be pissed off as well :-\

Also, how many people know about this? I assume Gat knew, since she was implied to be responsible for the mind wipes, but was it like... a super tightly-held secret or was it something a lot of higher-ups knew? Because that's fucked up tbh

Thought on the Master. Okay, he's hugely furious that he's been lied to, that the entire origin of his people is based on a lie, that his greatest friendrivalloveenemy is incredibly special and that a part of her is in him and not in the fun way, but like... I'm also wondering if he's looking at the Time Lords, the way they turned him into their puppet, how they drove him insane for their own purposes, then looked at the Doctor - someone who has also been used, abused, experimented on, manipulated, controlled, and went, "No. This is an injustice and the Time Lords need to be punished for it."

Oh, saw a nice theory regarding the TARDISes - Ruth!Doctor had the original busted police box TARDIS. When she was eventually taken in to be mind-erased, they sent the TARDIS off to storage to be eventually repaired. The Doctor manages to steal that one, goes to Earth, and it immediately gets stuck again because it's still broken. Explains how Ruth!Doctor can have the police box while also being pre-everything.

I really want the Doctor and Jack to sit down and have a nice chat about being timeless undying constants of the universe. Also for Jack to get one of the spare TARDISes around. Be kinda funny if he got the Master's old one, given the Year That Never Was, but it really is just sitting there. (Poor TARDIS stuck as a tree on a random wartorn planet in the far future, though!)

Also, Jodie was fucking magnificent in this episode. The hurt, the absolute fury, the almost glee when she's telling the Master he can't break her, her refusal to press the button at the end (so much like Nine's "coward or killer?" moment!)... just... so good.

Beautiful post I saw here on Tumblr - the Doctor as the Timeless Child, making the choice to help.

Amazing post here on Tumblr about abuse and repressed memories. Even if the Doctor doesn't remember it all, the abuse they underwent at the hands of a beloved parent figure still informs a hell of a lot of their behaviour, but it doesn't define them. The Doctor's need to run = informed by abuse. The Doctor's desire to help crying children = informed by abuse. The Doctor being an inherently good person = being their own person, no matter what their upbringing, no matter what their past was. They made the choice to be the Doctor, and that's a hell of an important thing.

Extremely painful post I saw on Tumblr about the Doctor being 'hip with the kids' by calling her companions her Fam but hell if they're not more family to her than her actual adoptive mother ow my heart.

Also, the scene between Yaz and Graham was so sweet <3 I do want to see Yaz, at some point, admit that sometimes she's so terrified she can barely move, and to tell him what she came so close to doing when she was sixteen, and Graham to just go, "Yeah, but you keep going." Also I'm trying not to think about how Yaz would respond to the Doctor going off on a suicide mission when Yaz was suicidal just three years earlier because ow my heart. She knows that Ko Sharmus went after her, she knows the Doctor might be alive, but either way, she's just seen someone she loves leave with the intention of dying (and Ko Sharmus too, actually). Someone please give her a hug. Actually please just let the Fam have a big group hug in general.

"Have you ever been limited by who you were before?" "Huh. Now that does sound like me talking."

So, remaining questions to be answered next season!

What actually is the Doctor? Since they were found near the Boundary, they could be from anywhere. It's fair to say they now are recognised genetically as a Time Lord, but what were they originally, why were they abandoned in the first place, and are there any more of their original people out there?

How do the Remnants know about the Timeless Child, or were they just picking up on that unconscious knowledge from the Doctor's own mind?

Like... we're generally under agreement that the Master, the eternal cockroach, survived, right? Despite definitely being lowkey suicidal like oh, was hoping the Death Particle would kill me? Like the Death Particle was made by the Cyberium, it could have gone, "Nah, keeping this one."

What's going on with the Kasaavin? Remember them? Still out there, stationed all through time and space? And are we going to see Daniel Barton again?

Is something going on with Yaz?

Will the Fam stay on? (I personally think Ryan will elect to stay on Earth to account for Tosin Cole's new TV role, and if Graham and Ravio enter a relationship, he might too.)

When will we see Jack again? If he was connected to the Lone Cyberman arc, that seems... pretty conclusively finished, unless we're going to learn more about it?

Is it Christmas yet?

............so the Christmas/NY special is going to start with Jack using his vortex manipulator to bust the Doctor out of prison and get back to the Fam and it'll never be mentioned again, right.

"At least buy me diNNER!!"

#doctor who #companion love #best enemies #long post

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madamhatter · 3 years

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Witch of the Cosmos

In Which (Sophie) The Sorceress is Explored/ A Different Adaptation Is Explored.

This is basically a ‘proof of concept’ aka me writing out what I’ve written for this version and applying it nasu.verse.

The Sophie known as the Witch of the Cosmos has been sprinkled throughout this blog’s running. She is a Sophie that is able to through tenacity and miracle is able to break the cycles of self-dejection/self-denial/self-imprisonment she has made for herself and is able to live. She is a Sophie that is able to live with better knowledge of her magic and is rendering the full capacity of her magic - which is foreseeably limitless and frightening altogether.

Like in this post (x), the original idea was this is a post-curse Sophie whose lifespan was ultimately meddled as a result of the curse and, unintentionally, her own magic. She is, unfortunately, considered outside of the cycle of mortality. Because of sudden shoifts between her aging and her life cycle being tangled, she is someone who would’ve aged significantly slower. In this initial take, she isn’t considered immortal, but is definitively ‘inhuman’ and ‘undying’ by how long it’s taken her to look this old. Because of such power, she does live up to the title of “madame sorceress.”

The great sorceress’s reach of magic includes the ability of crafting, altering, and ending contracts (between other people and those that she makes with people), changing the flow of life and lives of others (be it through speaking to people or items), giving life and sentience to others (and giving it away), and much more. Her magic is literally conducted by her voice; she is only limited by what she can say. There is more original ideas like her being able to travel across worlds (as it is canon in book verse) and actually creating life from ‘nothing.’ Hell, she made a pocket world for herself - (More information in Part 1)

However, this has changed to better suit better literary themes and character challenges - -. Sophie becomes impermanently immortal by her her own magic inflicted on herself (created because of her own emotions, unresolved traumas, and lingering hesitancy). Her own situation still has her working with the remnants of how she used ‘personas’ and masked her true self from others. In this case, she does feel at peace with certain things and lives somewhat better - but is still haunted by many others. She is a form that is very aware of how the other Sophies (or ‘sproutlings’ as she calls them) will and have lived.

There is The Sorceress and Sophie the Sorceress. The former is not Sop.hie Ha.tter and the latter is. A TLDR; Sophie the sorceress, exhausted from existing for so long, decides to eject her soul and have a chance to be mortal again. In her last moments, she breathes ‘life’ to her own magic - giving her own power the gift of sentience. The ‘magic’ is left with Sophie’s body as Sophie’s soul leaves and rejoins the cycle of rebirth. (More information in Part 2)

A plot that has been going on between Athena’s Kohaku and my Sophie, which we can dub the “amnesiac route.” It is in which the river deity some years after Spirt.ed A.way and wishes to reunite with his first love, Ch.hiro. The Sorceress makes a contract with him that grants him that chance. To be mortal and beside his beloved, she grants such chance and in exchange for his immortality and memories. This is an attempt for the Sorceress is reunite with the soul. (More information in Part 3)

However (x2), this plot is exclusive to these threads/storyline and is not applicable to every chance (A) that the Witch of Cosmos verse is involved , OR, (B) where the Witch of Cosmos counterpart/variant exists in a verse.

This is a case where the (B) point is being focused on and being worked to be better situated in a universe.

ONTO THE PROOF OF CONCEPT

The Witch of Cosmos’ concept existing in Nasu.verse is very possible and what she has done/what can do can be explained through different mechanics. I have already written down these items on a still unfinished google doc that is meant to be Sophie’s nasu.verse profile.

The Witch of Cosmos will now be better referred to as the Witch of Life. It is more fitting. It is basically her title switched with her ‘origin,’ that being Life. The alternative thought was that her ‘origin’ would be ‘creation,’ but you can easily slip ‘creation’ into the large umbrella that ‘life’ covers. That is the base that is always ‘canon’ to a nasu.verse Sophie to have this origin as is the fact she temporarily sealed it unknowingly when younger.

This counterpart is attuned to the flow of life/life itself than her mortality/human self. In this scenario, her origin magic is actually detaching her further from her humanness as the magic is getting more and more powerful. This fate is not applicable to all Sophies that manage themselves to live past their short-lived tragedies - but it is something that may arise, depending on the conditions.

The Witch Of Life functions as the figure that travels across different universes and behaves like an observer. She is not a being like the Ultimate Ones nor a Deity nor Daemon. By definition of how her existence started (human), she is classified lower than them. But by her magic and what it may do, she is arguably in a class that both surpasses and is undefinable, considering the scale of growth is endless for her. Maybe the fact that she could make contact with them is interesting enough-. She’s already been contacted and worked with deities and daemons before, and one or two other worldly figures.

The Witch of Life may be an eligible candidate for the Th.rone of H.eroes (ToH). However, given her range of power and the audacity of how far it can go, her presence being known on the world would be disastrous. Not because people would know her - quite the opposite, she is an enigma. The fact that the “im” in “impossibility” does not apply to her capabilities and what she may do, she exists as a form of great power that doesn’t have an inherent lean in what she may do with the power.

If you will, consider her a great force that operates with such a large scale of freedom. And with that kind of unrestrained magic and chaotic possibility with her, well... That is something that most would not want to risk if she isn’t pertinent to their plan or interests.

Depending on which version of the WORLD she allows her appearance to be known, she may be marked as a threat. If she is needed or dare requested by that variant, then the dynamics with her and that particular world changes.

However, there is always the fact that she may not be allowed exist completely in the “human world” and must stay adrift between the thin layers of realities that exist. Or, as usual, she stays in her pocket dimension (which would be better known as her real.ity m.arble) or on a very special level that she refers to as her “office.”

The “office” is basically where other worldly figures or those unfortunate enough to cast the wrong spells end up at. This is usually the spot where people negotiate for contracts or beg for help in situations that could be solved with her magic.

In the case that the Witch of Life is compatible to be allowed to the ToH, the best variants or descriptors that would apply to her are either Caster or Foreigner. A Sophie could exist as a ‘Caster’ whose abilities are that of the Witch of Life’s, but is not exactly her. I.E., a Sophie who lives long enough and through her unintentional heroisms, she manages to leave a mark and be a candidate for the ToH.

The Witch of Life is considered a singular entity and her ties and past are a mystery. As in, what version of Sophie lived to become the Witch of the Life is unknown. However, she is considered the ‘collective representative’ of others Sophies that may have gotten close to this form or actually reached it. This is possible due in part by the matter of multiple universes existing and the beauty of there always being an AU in the hard-to-understand lore of Nasu.verse.

Technically speaking, she is possibly among the most difficult servants to maintain - not because of her personality or attitude, but the sheer amount of aptitude and magic her summoner would need in order to maintain a good portion of her magic. She would cheerfully refer to herself as among the most “useless servants to exist.”

By all means she could perform her greater spells and actually reveal her moveset, but the problem lies in the master. As in, she could kill her master because of how much mana some of her spells may need. A regular Sophie is basically on a EX level in terms of quantity and quality because of how active her magic is, how she cannot ‘turn off’ the magic, and how infectious it is. Then again, she could operate with her own reserves, but that can be a bit of a complication.

#( in which we learn about the eldest ; headcanons )#( verse: witch of the cosmos )#( verse: night air ; silver traces ; boundless breadth ; betwixt self and unknown )#long post tw #long post

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untamed-sun · 4 years

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Lan Wangji (and Wei Wuxian) Meta

I promised @myakkoh to write up a meta I posted to discord. This will be slightly different from what I wrote there, as I’m not copying/pasting and I’m not on my phone. :)

I want to talk about Wei Wuxian before getting into Lan Wangji, first. Or talk about how my (Western/Christian) background which may badly shape that perception for a decidedly not Western or Christian show? Fair warning, there’s spoilers if you haven’t finished the story.

In the Old Testament there’s this bit about ‘an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth”. This was a way to reduce the threat of blood feuds and violence. In MZDS we have Xue Yang, for example, who says that the loss of his finger was worth the lives of an entire clan.

That’s the sort of thing that creates an escalating spiral of violence. Xue Yang loses a finger. He kills fifty Chang Clan members. If they had survived, and if Xue Yang had his own clan... then maybe one of thsoe survivors would have killed 100 of his kith and kin.

Limiting the violence to ‘an eye for an eye’ (or a finger for a finger... or even, as Xiao Xingchen pointed out, an arm for a finger) places limits on that.

That sort of view is a bit transformative. It’s natural for us to care mostly for ourselves and our loved ones, but we have a variety of cultural wisdom that help us see past that. The Silver Rule of Confucius, the Golden Rule of Christianity. Reminders to care for each other even when we’re not related by blood or friendship.

Wei Wuxian has that sort of wisdom. He sees injustice and doesn’t want to keep his head down and stay safe. That’s one of the underlying differences between him and Jiang Cheng.

This isn’t to knock on Jiang Cheng - he’s a Sect Leader, was the Heir, and he has to worry about his people. He also lost almost everyone when Lotus Pier fell, and he’s fundamentally more concerned with his people. He wanted to protect Wei Wuxian, and if the cost of that was letting all the Wen Remnants die that was fine. He repeatedly criticizes Wei Wuxian for trying to be a hero, for stepping up and drawing attention.

Wei Wuxian knows that somebody has to do it, that if everyone keeps their head down and tries to avoid trouble that ultimately they will all suffer. Jiang Cheng would rather he and his stay safe.

Jiang Cheng and Wen Chao both have asked Wei Wuxian why he was playing the hero, which is funny because Wei Wuxian is a hero, and is definitely not ‘playing’ at it.

Part of the tragedy of this story is that Wei Wuxian fails at it. That other people suffer the consequences for his attempts to ‘be the change you want to see’. He’s transformative, but ultimately rather fails at transforming the cultivation world (at least, when it comes to the Wen Remnants and how they are treated after their defeat.)

But this all started with Lan Wangji.

The differences and similarities between Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian are fascinating. Wei Wuxian has an infamous reputation, the worst parts of which are unearned. Lan Wangji has a stellar reptutation, much of which is also unearned.

He’s not as ‘pure’ and ‘good’ as his reputation makes him out to be. We don’t see a lot of his interiority, so it’s hard to say how much he did it out of love and how much was because he felt Wei Wuxian was unfairly villainized. Truth to tell, I find the novel story arc a bit confusing and complicated here (Lan Wangji protects him in a cave? But then the Lan elders find him and he fights them off and loses. So three months later the cultivation world has the first siege of the Burial Mound, and Wei Wuxian dies... and Lan Wangji only hears about it later? The CQL version has it’s own problems, and I’m sad that the second siege of the Burial Mound isn’t as coherent and misses some important bits from the novel, but it also is a bit... easier to understand the timeline. I like to think Wei Wuxian falling off the cliff is because he knows the backlash is coming from destroying the Stygian Tiger Seal rather than suicide, but that’s my own personal headcanon. Novel Wei Wuxian died of a backlash, after all.)

We see that he can be jealous and petty, particularly when it comes to Wei Wuxian. Novel Lan Wangji also forcibly kisses a blindfolded Wei Wuxian on Phoenix Mountain, and helped save Wei Wuxian after the massacre at Nightless City, where Wei Wuxian (tragic hero though he mostly is) did commit mass murder. There's a tumblr post I can't find right now that talks about that, and the novel sex scenes, and consent. It seems some translations make it sound worse than the original?

What is interesting to note is that despite his jealousy he never really tried to control Wei Wuxian. He was hurt and upset, especially when he realized Wei Wuxian flirted meaninglessly. He stole the pouch Mianmian gave Wei Wuxian and used it as his money bag and he warned Wei Wuxian that people can get hurt by his flirting, but... he's not trying to force Wei Wuxian to be with him.

Anyways. CQL and novel characterizations are a bit different, but the CQL definitely shows how at their core Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji are very similar. They share the same values, they care about protecting the weak and defenseless. They care about justice, and right and wrong.

In Wei Wuxian’s first life, Lan Wangji was too hampered by his upbringing. By respect for his Uncle, his brother, and the rules he was raised to believe in. He wasn’t just struggling with his feelings for Wei Wuxian. He saw that the Wen Remnants weren’t the threat rumor made them out to be, knew Wei Wuxian was being unfairly maligned... and wasn’t ready to take the next step.

Wei Wuxian cut ties to his family and stepped onto that single plank bridge. He told Jiang Cheng that he would have saved the Wens even if it hadn’t been for Wen Ning and Wen Qing. He wasn’t doing it because he owed them, he was doing it because that’s what was right. Despite how deeply Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng love each other, there’s a fundamental difference there.

That difference isn’t there with Lan Wangji. Lan Wangji didn’t disagree with Wei Wuxian’s values, so much as that he was still very confused about a lot of things. Wei Wuxian practiced demonic cultivation, which was evil according to everything Lan Wangji has been taught. Wei Wuxian flippantly disregards rules that Lan Wangji spent his life following. Lan Wangji wasn’t ready to challenge everything he’d built his life on.

And then Wei Wuxian dies.

Lan Wangji’s punishment for fighting with the elders is... interesting on a number of levels.

It reminds me a bit of my experiences in the military, actually. Discipline is important, following orders is important (you don’t want to waste time arguing or explaining in a life or death situation!)... but soldiers don’t actually blindly obey. Or rather, they’re not supposed to. We’re not supposed to follow orders that are illegal. As World War II and the Nuremburg Trials show, ‘just following orders’ is not an acceptable excuse when you’re ordered to do something wrong.

Despite that, there is a safety in following orders, and following the rules. It doesn’t put the burden of deciding what’s right or wrong on you. Deciding that a particular rule or order shouldn’t be obeyed is a decision that shouldn’t be taken lightly, and you should be able to justify or explain that decision.

And... you should be able to accept the consequences of that decision. If you truly believed it was right, truly believed it was important, then it should be important enough to do even if you get in trouble with it.

This is how I interpret Lan Wangji’s punishment. He accepted it, showing that he still respects the rules (and the elders, and his clan)... but everyone also knew that he would still make the same choice again if he had to.

He is not rejecting everything the Lan stand for, not defecting from his clan. He has, however, chosen to use his own judgement (and accepted the consequences of so doing.)

It shows some of the same transformative elements as Wei Wuxian defecting to protect the Wen.

#lan wangji #wei wuxian #mzds #untamed

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faunusrights · 6 years

Text

OFFAL HUNT REMASTER LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 9

oh goody!

well this is it. the Date Chapter. the chapter, in which, the Date happens. lowkey im so fucking hype for this stupid goddamn chapter AAAAAAAAAAAA this is when the sexy got kicked up about seven notches and i know its gonna be a fucking twenty from here on out so LETS GO LESBIANS LETS GO

“Is this your date, Ms. Fall?” he asked.

Cinder didn’t look away from Glynda. “Mhm.”

STRAIGHT OUT OF THE GODDAMN GATE WE DIDN’T EVEN HAVE A SECOND TO EVEN GATHER OURSELVES JUST STRAIGHT UP HUH!!!!!!!!! ‘is this your date’ im legally dead

What the fuck.

already im fucking THRIVING im so glad this chapter’s mood got encapsulated within the first ten seconds and im definitely gonna have to re-read this chapter for the full unannotated experience OOOOOOOOOH MY GOD IM SO READY

Glynda’s thoughts ricocheted inside her head like coins left in a dryer. A part of her couldn’t understand what was happening and disengaged. The rest of her, grasping for purchase in all this, reasoned that going with Cinder was better than staying here confused, alone, and utterly displaced.

glynda ‘i aint ever had a gf before’ goodwitch at her PEAK right here. like GOD shes gone from ‘cinder’s trying to murder me’ to ‘cinder just plopped me right into a date’ like CINDER. CINDER YR CHANGING GEARS SO FAST. YOU DIDNT EVEN SEND FLOWERS OR ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

is it because shes a u-haul lesbian or

Higher, Glynda realized the dress itself was backless, revealing the black tattoo she’d seen so often before, perfectly centered between sharp shoulder blades.

this gay energy is BONKERS, quite frankly??????? where did cinder get her dress from? why does she have it? did she buy it just for this fuckery? or will she pull the ‘i just had a this lil number laying around’ line????????? does she wanna seduce glynda to death?????? was this PLANNED OR DID SHE JUST DECIDE SHE WANTED A DATE AND WTH LIFE REALLY IS SHORT ON REMNANT THESE DAYS?????????? cinder fall please explain your workings to the class

maybe Glynda wasn’t the only one who’d become adept at reading her opponent.

👏 when 👏 will 👏 they 👏 kiss 👏 already 👏👏👏👏

me: this is a slowburn also me: if u assholes dont give me this in the next ten seconds-

“Unarmed? As if you could be so helpless.”

cinder’s style of flirting is just. commentating on a person’s deadliness. that’s IT it’s the only TRICK SHE HAS and its working, is the thing,

im reading the description of the table and remembering the shitpost and oh my god i have to draw this???? hell IS real!!!!!! COULDNT YALL JUST TOSS EM IN A PLAIN BOX,

Cinder eyed her from her bastion of dark cushions,

cinder, ass-deep in cushions: this is peak cuddle territory come and join me

Cinder, for her part, seemed delighted Glynda had noticed. Touching the pendant more gently than Glynda might have ever thought her capable of, Cinder said, “Yours? You didn’t seem to mind parting with it.”

im still deeply enjoying this powermove the novelty NEVER wears off (and at risk of light spoilers i do enjoy its place in this story 👀)

Cinder let the necklace drop, settling against the swell of her bust once more,

/lightly coughs 👀👀👀

im losing my MIND at how gay this bit is i physically cannot HANDLE IT and if they even describe the meal once im gonna pop off cause i am. SO HUNGRY RN. AAAAAAAAAAAA

Cinder indicated a dish of lamb and vegetables, served on a bed of rice and drizzled in some sort of sauce.

SRY THIS ISNT GAY BUT OH MY GOD IM SO HUNGRY I WANNA E A T I T THAT SOUNDS SO GOOD UGHGHGHGHGHGH WHY DID THIS CHAPTER HAVE TO BE TODAY OF ALL THE DAYS,

Glynda cleared her throat, working out: “The Grimm.”

like. GOD WE KNOW GLYNDA IS JUST SO FUNCTIONALLY BAD AT CONVERSATION BUT OF ALL THE THINGS glynda please just. just. stop thinking abt her sexy tattoos for a fifth of a second,

“You can control them.” A sedate blink. For all the world, Glynda might have just commented on the weather.

which is a faux pas for a date!!!!!!!!!!! at least tell her the DRESS IS SEXY WE ALL KNO WHATS WHAT YR THINKIN ABT

Glancing down as though it were being pointed out to her for the first time, Cinder shrugged and adjusted the end of the glove a little higher on her bicep. “And?”

a quick aside im enjoying how like... visually expressive cinder is in this remaster! i can see her facial expressions and her motions really clearly in my mind’s eye which is a fun little boon if only because i have to redraw this nonsense hjsgdfjhfksgd but cinder’s got a Good Face this time around! A QUALITY FACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You should know by now, there’s something about you that’s simply irresistible to Grimm.”

HERE COMES THE PLOT (and a single surviving line so far... this one sentence has survived all the world could throw at it... we stan)

Cinder straightened, and Glynda saw that this was what she’d been waiting for.

“It isn’t every day the great Glynda Goodwitch kneels before her adversary, is it?”

HELLO??????????????????????????? WHATS THIS WORDING????????? honestly tho for a second i thought she meant like. quite literally and i thought id missed some PROPER SHIT RIGHT THERE BUT YEAH WTH!!!!!!! C I N D E R

“You cheated. You can’t beat me on your own.”

yes glynda we gathered that yr a top

“Really, Glynda? Poison?” she sneered, something like offense simmering in her expression. “After all this?”

looks at the camera

anyway,

god im literally losing grasp of words to say because theres such a charged mood in this scene............. theyre brushing fingers............ trading jabs.......... im slurpin it up babey!!!!!!!! this rly is the BEST remaster of this whole scene it DESERVES this wordcount!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Beat you,” Cinder corrected. “And call it a point of pride.”

yes cinder we gathered yr a brat,

this dynamic is why this fic is so fuckign good when will winter have a swift return to add even more fuckery to this wild ride

Then, with a heavy-lidded look, Cinder found Glynda’s hand between them, the touch so sudden and daring that Glynda flinched. The fabric of those gloves was smooth against Glynda’s flesh, and for all that cruelty had marked every other instance of contact between them, Cinder was surprisingly gentle.

whomp there go my nuts

WHAT IS THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHO MADE THE EXECUTIVE CHOICE TO ADD THIS LINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELLO???????????? im losing my BRAINCELLS

What she wasn’t ready for was for Cinder to guide her hand to her own throat and hold it there.

THERE IS IT THERE’S THE KINK IT’S BEEN SPOTTED

oh my GOD what even IS THIS WHO ADDED THIS SECTION WHO ALLOWED THIS TO COME TO P A S S WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS RN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELLO????????? HEWWO??????????

Now… Now Cinder interested her.

tbh how can i liveblog this? what commentary can i POSSIBLY add that we arent already all THINKING. we just launched into a level of hell so deep that lucifers gonna have to pull some goddamn tricks to follow us down here!!!!!!!!!! WHAT IS THIS SCENE! THIS MOMENT! IM SCREAMING

Glynda mirrored the expression back at him, and finally, he coughed, not making strong eye contact with either of them. He set their plate before them and hurried out without so much as a check-in.

i just KNEW that was gonna happen JHGDSFGJHKSDF he was gonna walk in on SMTHNG but i didnt think itd be CINDER’S CHOKING KINK,

okay i took a break and ate my weight in roast chicken and we’re back babey

Almost nervously, her fingers carded through her own dark hair, and there, among the locks, Glynda spotted a glimpse of something white, structured and ridged.

AND I AM INSTANTLY KNOCKED BACK UPON MY ASS 👈W👈H😨A👈T👈

It was easier to ignore the rest of it—whatever it was.

glynda you are a fool and a moron im withering into DUST

On no level had she expected those to be Glynda’s words.

then what... did she expect... well probably -- and rightly so -- ‘bitch WHAT ARE THOSE’ TBH

wait sorry i have to jump back because i forgot customary fingerguns on the most brazen bit of Shit yet:

Cinder was occupying herself with something else: the head of a dragon, perched over the door and staring down at the two of them with red, glossy eyes.

👈👈👈😎👈👈👈

okay BACK TO THE FIC

Fangs snapped together around the word.

aka back to me horni

/chanting TEETH! TEETH! TE

okay but the reason i doubled back to catch that fingergun is because we’re getting ass-deep into plot now!!!!!!!!!!! WITCHES AND DRAGONS BABEY......... HERE’S WHAT OFFAL HUNT IS ALL ABT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i cant rly drop more fingerguns than that because any astute reader will start realising the dots im shouting abt and honestly half the fun of this fic is the ride so >:3c

“Funny. I was sure he would have told you.”

that blow was so low i think cinder hit the concrete with that one

oh god theyre gonna get to the bit and i-

“Is that what all of this has been about? You called me here to remind me that I'm autistic?”

/SCREAMS

The words were delivered firmly, calmly, but Cinder’s response was the opposite, sudden upheaval seizing her. Her expression opened in something akin to panic. “Wh—no? What? No! That's not what I—”

/SCREAMS

oh my GOD CINDER YOU HAVE FUCKED UP LEGENDARILY!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD SHE WAS FELL ASS-FIRST ONTO A LANDMINE OH MY GOD

offal hunt v1 cinder: im totally in control and im playing glynda every step of the way

offal hunt v2 cinder: OH JESUS OH FUCK OH NO THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT-

Cinder seemed genuinely stressed now, speaking quicker as though trying to bury the last sixty seconds.

i knew this remaster would have sections that would blow me away but this bit really took the fcuking cake DGHSJFSJHFDG holy SHIT this is AMAZING

It was difficult to tell in the low light, but if Glynda wasn't mistaken, there was a bright flush of embarrassment coloring Cinder’s cheeks.

this is SUCH prime content hey remember in one of the early liveblogs that cinder would descend into full dork? WELL THE DESCENT CAME EARLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! /pops bottles

“Cinder.” There was a very real line of threat in Glynda’s tone. “Don’t.”

oh this whole scene just keeps getting better i am LOVING this dynamic now!!!!!!! before it was all pretty one-sided so having the conversation rock back and forth is 👌👌👌

That Witch soul of yours—it was designed to void out everything but the prey before you. To be numb to all human emotion. To focus on the hunt and nothing else.

finally the fruit of 50% of my fingerguns COMES TO LIGHT!!!!!!!!!!! PLOT PLOT PLOT

“This is bullshit.” Jabbing an accusing finger at Cinder, Glynda said, “You’re a liar. You’re a criminal!”

i LOVE glyndas pottymouth in this its such a good like... change from her being strict and formal and teachery and now shes full on gremlin huntress hell YES BABY!!!!!!!!!! GO OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“There’s all kinds of things I bet he never told you.” Cinder continued. “Did you know he was close to your predecessor? The Witch who came before you—they were inseparable.”

SRY IM LIKE STRUGGLIN TO COMMENTATE because so much of this like. speaking as an Old-Ass Reader this is like. a LOT! A LOT HAS CHANGED and yet,,,, stayed the same,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, yall kids WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL CHAPTER LIKE................ 15 FOR THIS SHIT (but like. chapter 15 was different because this chapter used to be like chapter 7? so now everythings moved along so chapter 15 doesnt sound that impressive but trust me it was a different fic back then)

When they fell away, burnt and ruined, she could see Cinder’s bare arms for the first time. The red lines drawn across her skin sloped down the entire length of her arms, circling her elbows, carved into her wrists. They ended right at her hands, ensuring any long-sleeved garment would hide them. Every covered inch of her was filled like a canvas, like abstract art.

lets pause the fight scene for glynda to be gay!!!!! god im. okay look i said this earlier but im so glad we have more cinder like this tbh. the first version was rly lacking w/ cinder content until late-game when the plot sorta. got itself going? but now we’re eye-deep in this content i LOVE cinder i love this WEIRDO who is a HUGE LOSER and IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM LOVE HER SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And Glynda could not dispel the fear that she had been telling the truth.

and after committing Some Amount In Damages, we’re at the end of the chapter!

okay so i really enjoyed this version SO MUCH MORE. everything abt it was polished and worked together so much better and it really needed the space to breathe in its own chapter. its been horny, gay, intense, hilarious, and way more in one chapter and its SO good this really is PEAK offal hunt!!!!!!!!!!!! good job diesel and kc but im still going to murder you both,

#rwby #offal hunt #liveblog

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philippmichelreichold · 5 years

Text

#scifi #Review Barrington J Bayley's Collision Course daw books

#scifi # Review Barrington J Bayley's Collision Course

I first read Barrington J. Bayley's Collision Course/Collision with Chronos more than thirty years ago. I must have given my first copy to the Goodwill. I searched for years before finding my current copy at Haslam's Books in St. Petersburg, Florida. They are the best. Collision Course is the sort of story you want to not lose.

Bailey follows a fairly unique approach to time travel stories. The vast majority deal with an alterable timeline that must either be changed or preserved to save the viewpoint character's way of life, the universe, etc; or with a multiverse where myriads of ways unfold and whatever decision a character might make, other versions of that character are deciding to do the same thing or its opposite. One example of the former is Poul Anderson's Time Patrol stories. There are many examples in Star Trek with its time loops and Predestination Paradoxes and Chiefs O'Brien averring their hatred for Temporal Mechanics. Larry Niven's All the Myriad Ways is an example of the latter. Catch that Zeppelin by Fritz Lieber and Joe Haldeman's Manifest Destiny offer alternate time lines within a multiverse. Another approach, my personal favorite, is that you can't change the past. This the premise of By the Time We got to Gaugamela by R Garcia y Robertson. You can go back, but whatever is about to happen has already happened. To paraphrase, all the history books agree that Alexander the Great is going to be alive tomorrow, but no such assurances are available for the time traveller in question. Bailey takes a totally different tack from any of these, one ""so original that it avoids all (most?) time-travel clichés".

According to The Newsletter of the Council for the Literature of the Fantastic, Bailey followed the ideas of J. W. Dunne set forth in An Experiment with Time. Time travels as a wave or a torrent through six dimensional space in a local region of what we perceive as three dimensional space, creating and carrying life and consciousness with it as side effects. The future is dead and decayed, the past dead-- a collection of insensate automatons. You can build a machine to carry a bit of time with you ahead of or behind the time wave, but it won't do you any good. Times finger, having writ, moves on and you cannot change a word, act or dead. The trouble comes when two different time streams are headed along the same planet in opposite directions, like a pair of locomotives rushing along a track on a collision course set to arrive at a fatal destination. Life-consciousness-intelligence, it cannot be over emphasized, are byproducts of the time stream/wave/torrent.

And so it is in Collision Course that two time streams associated with Earth will crash together in about 200 years, with serious effects noticeable in about 100 years. Collisions of this nature must occur with some frequency as the International Space Society Retort City, located many light years from Earth and populated by the descendants of Chinese emigrees, has recently had a near miss with an entity whose time stream is situated obliquely to that of Retort City. The inhabitants of Earth are just beginning to understand time travel. The inhabitants of Retort City can literally run rings around the Earthers, and the Oblique Entity has nearly godlike (not Godlike as it points out) powers. The abilities of Retort City's scientists and the Oblique Entity, combined with obliqueness of their paths, allowed them to avert total disaster. Even so, things got pretty bad. The Oblique Entity and a researcher on Retort City have been watching events on Earth unfold with detached insouciance and mild concern. Time travellers from Retort City rescue stranded time travellers from Earth and offer to help.

Matters are not so straight forward at this point as one might hope. ISS Retort City was established 5000 years before the setting of the story, which is many thousands of years ahead of our own time. The races of man on Earth bare little physical resemblance to the people of our times (the "Chinks" of Retort City are a legendary race on Earth). The dominant race on Earth, led by the Titanium Legions (think SS), follows an Earth Mother religion. They believe with all the fervor that religious conviction can bring that they, True Man, are Earth's true sons and all the other races are defiling deviants whom they must expunge. There are archaeological ruins of alien design scattered about they believe support these beliefs.

The Titans see these ruins as proof of Alien Interventionalists who diabolically caused the rise of the Deviant races to destroy True Man. Never mind that there had been nuclear wars in the past with radioactive fallout to increase background radiation levels and thereby raise the mutation rate and never mind that the new races arose isolated from one another for a long time. Natural selection and niche filling divergence don't fit their self image or self interests. Or their self serving propaganda. Genocide is something the Titans have been quite successful at with only a few remnants of the other races remaining on reservations. The Titans have roving "experts" that can tell at a glance if someone is "racially impure". There is of course opposition and an underground which is losing faster each day. When the Titans learn of the ISS, with its wondrous technology and mighty industrial capacity, the natural recourse is to mount an invasion.

Retort City is designed as a double retort with the retorts set end to end. Lower Retort/Production Retort is devoted to industry and production. The mastery of time is so complete that different sections of a ping pong table can have different time streams moving at separate rates. Production lines can be run through time loops so that an artefact that was months in the making can be available hours after being ordered. The two halves are offset by about 34 years, so direct travel between the two halves is futile. Manufactured goods travel along a time gradient to the other half of the city and always arrive just in time. So great is Production Retort's efficiencies that it has greater industrial capacity than all of earth. The workers there are wholly devoted to their work. Their absorption with work is so great that off duty conversation often centers on how and where work is going. To them any other way of life would be a waste. "Technology was, after all, their life."(pg 54)

Life within Upper Retort/Leisure Retort is more luxurious, more devoted to subtle esthetics, and "was probably the most refined culture the galaxy had to offer". (pg 57) It's inhabitants are wholly absorbed in advancing the arts and sciences, so absorbed that they tend to objectify people and ignore any human factor not connected with the research that holds their attention. (So self absorbed that the sounds of fighting with the Titanium Legions is less a survival threat than an annoying distraction.) Little physical labor is performed directly, there being machines to handle that sort of thing. The apparent social disparity between the two halves of Retort City is solved by their mastery of time. Envy is avoided by the Exchange of Generations. One sends one's children by way of a temporal differential tunnel to the opposite half of Retort City and receives one's grandchildren in return. Robert Gibson hits the nail firmly when he says the equanimity of the arrangement eliminates jealousy between Retort City's two halves. The Leisure Retort's inhabitants are not so self absorbed as to not offer to help the inhabitants of Earth deal with the impending collision.

Once again, nothing is easy. An evacuation of refugees is impractical on religious grounds. The Titan dominated society could never abandon Mother Earth. It is unfeasible logistically as not Retort City lacks the lift capability. Diverting the time streams is beyond their science. They are not sufficient to the task and must ask the Oblique Entity for its help-- a sort of deus ex machina.

Aliens are described in some stories as being too alien to comprehend. Most human motivations/conflicts begin with food safety and shelter and proceed along Maslow's hierarchy to greed status fulfilment and pleasure seeking. Niven's Kzinti are motivated by status and the desire to acquire estates on which to hunt and raise families. The alien empires in Star Trek seem involved in dominance games characteristic of humans. I don't recall hearing an explanation for the behavior of the aliens in Independence Day unless it was pure revulsion. Certainly hatred was evident. All understandable as human like. The Oblique Entity may be beyond human comprehension by nature. No human definition fits and description is based only on vague and fleeting perceptions. No words suffice for it to explain its nature to humans. One common trait comes through clearly-- the enjoyment of entertainment. One of the human time travelers implores its assistance in saving the Earth. How does one obtain aid from someone who finds great entertainment value in the unfolding drama of one's plight?

For that matter, how does one convince someone that their murderous hatred is misplaced and futile? The Titans and the lemur like creatures in the approaching time wave ignore the fact that consciousness/life/intelligence are but byproducts of time. Even if one group succeeds in exterminating the other, the 2 time waves will still crash together ending time and life. (It is a theme of the story that despots and tyrants and haters ignore any information that contradicts their dogma and preconceived notions.) Effort and time that would be better spent working together for mutual survival are wasted on hydrogen bombs and plague weapons. As the Oblique Entity says, the final Battle of Armageddon must be fought.

Collision Course is tightly written, fast paced story that wants to be read all the way through without a break. As one reviewer puts it, "Bayley packs more into under two hundred pages than most authors come up with in a lifetime". The characters are sketched in quickly, but you know them as well as need be to follow the plot. The unique approach to time travel and the unique solution to the class struggle make it well worth reading. The ending of the story is fitting as the major conflict is resolved to the satisfaction of all concerned, even if they don't all know it. It is not a sugar coated resolution and conclusion, but the Titans would not have had it any other way, "with their cargos of death, death, and more death." I first read the story when I was in my late teens and then reread it some 30 years later. I enjoyed it as much this time as I did the first time. It is not currently available as e-text, but there are paper copies still available.

Selected dramatis personae:

•Leard Ascar- Earth's leading time scientist

•Chairman of Panhumanic League

• Grandfather of Hue Su Mueng

• Herrick- Amhrak scientist inventor of remote, intferometry-based remote viewing

• Rond Heshke- prominent archeologist

• Hue Su Mueng- disgruntled Retort City malcontent

• Hueh Shao father of Hue Su Mueng

• Hwen Wu- Leisure Retort prime minister and old friend of Hueh Shao

• Layella- Sobrie's "racially impure" girlfriend

• Leader Limnich- leader of Titanium Legions and de facto ruler of Earth

• Li Kim- friend of Hue Su Mueng

• Li Li San- Retort City envoys to future Earth aliens

• Blare Oblomot- assistant to Rond Heske at Hathar Ruins. brother of Sobrie. member of Panhumanic League

• Sobrie Oblomot- member of Panhumanic League

• Shiu Kung Chien- Retort City's leading expert on time. in contact with the Oblique Entity.

• Titan-Lieutenant Gann- time travel tech officer

• Titan-Lieutenant Hosk- time travel tech officer

• Titan-Captain Brask

• Titan-Major Brourne

• Whang Yat-Sen Retort City envoy to future Earth aliens

Further reading about Barrington J. Bayley, Collision Course/Collision with Chronos

• COLLISION WITH CHRONOS on Ovias

• Astounding Worlds of Barrington J Bayley on Ovias

• Review of Collision Course on Science Fiction Ruminations

• Wryte Stuff-- Politics with a Difference - Science-Fictional Constitutions

• Jesse's Review on Goodreads

• Barrington J Bayley on Wikipedia

• Barrington J Bayley # ISFDB

• Barrington J. Bayley: Science-fiction writer who treated the human condition as a puzzle that must be solved

• Book Review: The Fall of Chronopolis, Barrington J. Bayley (1974)

• Book Review: Star Winds, Barrington J. Bayley (1978)

• Book Review: Empire of Two Worlds, Barrington J. Bayley (1972)

• The Zen Gun-Barrington J. Bayley (1983)

• Review: Let the Galaxy Burn - Warhammer 40k Anthology

• Obituary: Barrington J. Bayley

• Barrington John Bayley on Fantastic Fiction

Creative commons 4.0

Credit cover art image under fair use for review. contact publisher for reuse

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magioftheseas · 6 years

Note

What should you keep in mind when writing servant?

This question is tough!!! Although on principle, I would say that you should keep the same things in mind that you do with Komaeda with like…a few obvious changes accounted for.

But that does not mean predatory gay is acceptable now. In fact let’s just agree to pretend that isn’t even a thing because it’s not like it needs to be a thing, right?

So, Servant is actually really interesting in that his mindset is healthier than Komaeda’s, but his psychological state is obviously…not great. But it’s hard to say if Servant really reacts all that worse than Komaeda does in the killing game, but that’s…beside the point, I guess.

It’s important to keep in mind the change of mindset, is what I should focus on. After all, Komaeda is driven by a very societally-informed elitism, however Servant operates on a more meta-based logic.

He recognizes, more or less, that the world he’s living in operates similarly to an underdog story. Thus, his new duty is figure out how to use that awareness in order to create the perfect happy ending because he just wasn’t satisfied by Junko’s death. So onto making things bigger and better! That kind of thing!

Now, this is related specifically to his mindset in DRAE where Komaru is involved. But it’s still something to keep in mind because it’s what motivates him to do the things he does and to act the way he acts.

Because, with how he’s treating this like a fictional underdog story, he shows zero concern for Komaru as a person with limits and just the unrealism of expecting so much from a normal girl who just wants to go home when there’s no home to go back to. Komaeda definitely had shades of this in sdr2, but Servant takes it next level because he’s completely lacking in what humanity and consideration Komaeda had. That said, I wouldn’t say this makes him a sociopath even if it may seem that way.

After all, it’s not like he’s shown any understanding nor kindness when in sdr2, Hinata had been friendly towards him in the beginning and then tried to understand him later in spite of the sting of betrayal. If Servant has never known that, then I would say it’s more that there’s been zero opportunity to show a more sentimental side to his character rather than just denouncing any potential of it. He did have his mutually beneficial partnership with Monaka in which despite Monaka disappointing him, he still went out of his way to save her life. Even if he claims it’s for a utilitarian purpose, there’s nothing suggesting there wasn’t any ounce of sentiment or compassion involved in him helping her.

After all, Servant was moved enough by Komaru’s assertions of friendship with both Touko and Syo that he was happy to just leave them be. I also think that’s something to be kept in mind.

Other than all that, hmm…

Compared to Komaeda, I see Servant as even more erratic and distant, but he retains Komaeda’s clumsiness when it comes to personal attachments. He’s definitely someone who I think is a bit more casual with others, which is part of why he’s so much colder even if he doesn’t bite as much. He’s just very blunt to the point of trauma.

He’s also a lot more stoic, showing a far less variety of emotions than Komaeda does. I think that adds to the eeriness of him.

But despite that, I do see him as harboring soft spots for the WoH. He does go along with their whims in a way that’s at least a little enthusiastic. So I guess Servant really is fond of them? Either way, it’s something I do think should be acknowledged, especially since the kids (save for Nagisa lol) are receptive towards him in a way that they aren’t with adults. In fact, he’s not even viewed as an adult, thus not even a threat to their paradise. It’s pretty significant, I think, that Jataro includes him in his murals and that Kotoko isn’t the slightest bit threatened by him and is very much at ease around him despite her trauma.

So while Servant is still dangerous, he’s clearly ranked very low on the danger scale compared to the WoH, and, most likely, compared to the remnants. He’s very much the bottom of the despair food chain, I think, and that kind of affects how he should be handled in which he’s definitely a character to be wary of…but he’s definitely not the one you’d worry too much, comparatively speaking.

I should add that Servant is only really wearing the leash in the first place and getting called Servant because that was the WoH’s idea and that Komaeda presumably isn’t like this normally but…

If I suggested that you follow through canon on that note, I’d be a huge hypocrite. Lol.

When it comes to more sexual stuff, that’s trickier…

Because like, it’s not like people read porn for good character writing…

But if you are trying to be more serious, then I think you should be careful with making Servant more sexual. I definitely do see him as pretty forward, yes, but that’s with people that he’s already very comfortable with and has been intimate with before.

It’s honestly a pretty thin line to walk when you conflate mental/psychological hangups with eroticism, and considering the darker setting and if there’s sexual trauma involved, you seriously run the risk of fetishizing said trauma if you aren’t careful. That’s something you really should be wary of.

Again, that’s if you’re aiming for something more serious that isn’t just…pwp, haha. But, like, I’m not sure why you’d ask for character writing advice if all you’re writing is porn, but, I guess it doesn’t hurt to be more careful either way.

Still, I would suggest not writing something that suggests that “kinky behavior” is the result of sexual/emotional trauma and can like, disappear once “worked through” or whatever. Fifty Shades does that. You probably shouldn’t do things that Fifty Shades does.

That’s…just not how things typically work out, if you can believe it.

Side-note: I’m not very familiar with BDSM.

#Also important to keep in mind is Servant's love for beautiful people and disdain for ugly people #Just because that's really fucking funny #Magi answers #anonymous #magi ponders fic ideas #Magi headcanon #I guess?#servant (drae)#nagito komaeda #Again: feel free to inquire about specifics #I'm not sure if I covered everything necessary #But I tried

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erwinsoeyanto · 4 years

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Self-awareness is how you consciously know and understand your own character, feelings, motives, and desires.

What does self-awareness mean? In practical terms self-awareness means:

Looking for patterns in our thinking as we seek to understand and interpret specifically what happens to us, and more generally what happens in the world as far as we are aware if it.

Looking at how we ascribe meaning and value to those things.

Gaining insight into our emotions, moods, reactions and responses.

Paying attention to our default responses, and our ingrained habitual tendencies.

What is the purpose of self-awareness? The purpose of self-awareness is to realise personal benefits, such as:

Clarity of thought

More effective communication

Improved decision-making

Improved relationships

Improved moods

Increased personal productivity

What Is Self Awareness & How To Develop It?

[1] Pay attention to what bothers you about other people

Sometimes the things that irritate you in other people can be a reflection of some aspect you dislike in yourself and thus an area for you to work on.

Also, it can be because they think and process things differently to the way you do, and this can be a prompt you to re-evaluate and upgrade your understanding of their "type" [see 8. below]

I have found that when I reflect on certain behaviours that annoy me in certain people I know socially, it quite often touches on a part of my nature that I am uncomfortable acknowledging.

[2] Pay attention to what bothers other people about you

On occasions you meet and interact with people who for reasons not apparent to you will take an instant and strong dislike to you.

I recall some years ago being very disturbed to discover that there was some man in my social circle called Mike who had an intense dislike of me. I was totally unaware of this at the time and was only made aware of this when another mutual contact happened to mention that he was anxious about an upcoming social gathering because this man and I were both attending the same event.

When I asked him as to why he was concerned he said: "... but Stephen, don't you know that Mike has real issues with you... ?"

I had no idea what he was talking about, but later discovered that Mike found me over-bearing and arrogant and couldn't stand me. I was shocked, because I had no idea about this and couldn't recall any incident or situation that I was aware of, where I may have behaved in this way towards him.

What I eventually discovered was that the issues were on Mike's side and he was reacting to my positive and confident nature, and because I was an articulate confident sales man at the time he felt threatened by just being around me...

The immediate take away from that incident was to make me more self-aware of how others may perceive me and to try and be more sensitive.

Now, years later, I have become acutely aware that sometimes I can cause a reaction in people just by being in a room. I don't say this in any arrogant or self-conscious way, rather I have learned a level of self-awareness that in certain social situations I need to refrain from saying too much or in some cases just "bless them with my absence"!

[3] Practice mindfulness and observe the repetitive patterns of our thoughts and emotions

Thich Nhat Hanh teaches us how to develop awareness by recognising that our true home is not in the past and it is not in the future. Our true home is in the here and the now.

With mindfulness practise you will understand that what matters is not the content of your thoughts but your relationship with your thoughts.

This then leads to the realisation that you are not your thoughts.

[4] Know your emotional triggers

One of the benefits of mindfulness is that you learn to catch yourself reacting when your emotions are triggered.

Having practised mindfulness for about 15 years now I can certainly vouch for the way in which this practice helps me to become painfully and regularly aware of my emotional trigger points.

For example, I am incredibly impatient with other drivers on the road who are (in my view) dithering and driving way too slowly. My reactions are so predictable yet that is one area that I have not yet managed to control!

On bigger issues to do with relationships and things that occur in business I have learned to anticipate my reactions and not engage with my feelings and let them pass.

[5] Ask for feedback and listen

Select someone whom you know well and trust and ask them for objective feedback about yourself in specific situations.

I have asked for feedback from my family and close work associates occasionally, and what I have noticed is the difference between how I think I am talking to people and how they are actually receiving it!

For example, I am told that I frequently adopt a rather curt and bossy style and say things in a way that comes across as though I am telling people what to do. Whereas inside my head, I always feel that I am being very reasonable and helpful!

I understand that this is about tone. Clearly this is a big disconnect between my internal perception of my communication style and the way it is received!

I can't say that I get it right all the time now, but at least I now have an awareness of the problem and can try to take conscious action to amend it.

[6] Try different experiences - travel or learn a new skill

Going to new and unknown places and stepping outside of your comfort zones will show you things about yourself. This may be something major like international travel or simply taking on a new interest interacting with a different set of people to your usual crowd.

I have found that working in Singapore and travelling extensively throughout South East Asia and meeting, working with and socialising with people from many different backgrounds has challenged me and helped me in many different ways, and has definitely increased my self-awareness.

Contrary to what I expected when I first went to the region, I have learned that as human beings, despite our considerable ethnic and cultural differences, we all have far more in common than surface differences would suggest, and there is far more that unites us than divides us. We all share the same basic needs and have the same broad aspirations for ourselves and our loved ones.

Living, working and socialising under different political regimes is initially very challenging and I have found many of my previous "certainties" very challenged. One of the biggest things I have become aware of is how limited my original perspectives were. Seeing life through the lens of any one of a number of different regimes in S.E Asia causes me to re-examine and rethink some of previous certainties.

One quick example is Vietnam. Spending time there and immersing myself in the modern history and culture of Vietnam has considerably changed my view on communism.

In the past I have always seen communism as a negative influence on a country, and I am old enough to remember the days when Ho Chi Minh was regarded in the west as a rabble-rousing communist threat.

However, seeing first-hand the impact of years of oppression initially under the French followed by the American War [as it is referred to in Vietnam], I can now understand that Ho Chi Minh and communism were the "only show in town" at that time.

That is not so say that I now approve of, or support, communism because I don't, but I can now see why at that time it probably was the necessary vehicle for galvanising resistance to western oppression.

As a footnote, to any US readers who may take offence at what I saying, I respectfully suggest you spend half a day in the War Remnants [aka the War Crimes] Museum in Ho Chi Minh and see first-hand the horrendous and lasting impact on the peoples of Vietnam from US use of Agent Orange, and the lasting ecological damage to the landmass of North Vietnam.

I say the "lasting impact" on the people because there are still children being born with horrendous deformities as a direct result of the genetic damage done to their parents through the indiscriminate use of extremely large quantities of Agent Orange.

It is estimated that c1-1.5mill Vietnamese people are still directly affected by it. There is not a family network in modern Vietnam who do not have at least one present generation family member disfigured or damaged by the use of this in the America/Vietnam war.

[7] Take psychometric tests

Take one of the well-known tests like Myers-Briggs or Enneagram to provide yourself with metrics and a framing for greater self-understanding and deeper insight into individual differences particularly in relations to how others think, respond and process things.

This one was a real game changer for me! For many years of my adult life I just could not see how or why other people couldn't see what I could see, why they couldn't assess situations - especially in business- and see exactly what needed to be done [or least what I thought needed to be done]!

One day I discovered the Myers Briggs framework of personality types, and what a revelation! As I scrolled through the summary overview of the key characteristics of the 16 types I could see with painful clarity just how differently we do all think and process things. I also discovered that my dominant type was one which only typifies a small percentage of people. So no wonder I was usually so out of step with most other people around me when it came to thinking styles.

I appreciate the ridiculousness of what I am sharing here, a businessman in his mid forties finally figuring out why most people didn't think like him, but that was my reality.

Ever since then, I have tried to put considerable effort into trying to evaluate and take account of these individual differences.

[8] Make time to clarify your values

Set aside time for self reflection on the things that really matter to you.

Why are you here? What are you called to do? What makes for a fulfilling life that you can be truly proud of?

I was sitting in a bar in Singapore a while ago with a bunch of expat friends enjoying some beers and a chat. The conversation took an interesting turn when one of them suddenly asked the group:

"If you knew you were going to die tonight and you were given a few minutes to reflect before that happened, what would you say was the meaning of your life?"

On hearing that question I suddenly had a moment of clarity and I realised that for me the answer was (and remains):

"What difference will you make? What impact will you leave in the lives of others?"

#Erwin Soeyanto

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amethystina · 7 years

Note

For the DVD commentary: The Snowball Fight (because I know everyone's gonna ask for Hyperborean and Don't Tell Cougar)😀💜

So. Guess who did this thing and then accidentally saved it as a draft instead of queuing it? Sorry for the long wait, but, in my defense, I DID finish it rather quickly, I just failed to post it.

ANYHOW. The Snowball Fight is a 4k one shot so I won’t be commenting on ALL of it (because then we really will be here all day) but I’ll pick out some of my favourite bits! It’s still super long, though, so more below the cut!

Fair warning: I haven’t read this one in ages so many of the comments are just my reactions to my own writing, and not all of them are intelligent.

“Jensen,no. No.” Pooch took a cautious step backwards, holding up his hands inwhat could be a warning or an attempt to protect himself. It was difficult totell. “No, Jensen, don’t you dare. Jense—!” [The majority of this paragraph was actually not written by me (seeing as it was a writing prompt) but I feel like I made the most of it. I have no idea why I decided to write about a snowball fight, but it sounded like a good idea at the time]

Whateverelse Pooch had intended to say was smothered by the handful of snow Jake threwat his face. [I feel bad for Pooch, I really do] Jess really would have believed Pooch capable of ducking, but thenagain, he had probably thought that Jake wouldn’t go through with it. Whichproved just how much Pooch overestimated Jake’s level of maturity as soon assnow was involved. [Writing from Jess’s POV was an interesting experience and I’m really happy that I did it. I got to explore so many of the characters from a new perspective, which actually helped my overall view of them. Outside POV can do WONDERS for your grasp on characters. I strongly recommend it to all the writers out there.]

The factthat Jake gave Beth an enthusiastic high five while Pooch was busy spitting outsnow only seemed to confirm that fact. [They make a good team!]

“Forfu— fudge’s sake! Jensen!” Pooch snapped, no doubt attempting to chastise —but it sounded a lot more like whining. [I love Pooch. Does that show?]

Jesssnorted on a laugh and took a sip from her coffee cup. She stood leaningagainst the back porch railing, watching the others frolic in the snow. [This whole fic is just fluff and cuteness and I really wanted to show how calm and relaxed everyone is, including Jess. So while she’s not engaged in the snowy adventures, she’s definitely content, just standing there watching them.] Swearwords were not allowed in the presence of her daughter and that was a rathercreative save, she must admit. [Pooch is the one who respects this the most, hence the fudge. Jake occasionally slips up without meaning to and feels bad every single time because he might be corrupting his beloved niece. As for Cougar, Jess had to explain very calmly and very firmly that cursing in Spanish still counts and him thinking it didn’t won’t save him from punishment. Clay and Roque (while he was still on the team) are almost entirely banned from speaking at all, because they clearly can’t be trusted to keep their language clean.]

“What?”Jake was grinning, his cheeks pink from the cold and knitted hat askew. Muchlike his glasses, which he proceeded to push back into place. [I can’t be the only one who thinks this is cute. An excited Jake is always adorable and even more so when he looks like this.] “It wasfunny. That was funny, right?” He turned to Beth, as if to ask for herinput, and Beth, naturally, nodded enthusiastically. As if she would ever takePooch’s side over her beloved uncle’s. “See! Beth thinks it wasfunny!” [Actual nine-year-old Jake Jensen. Just look at this dork.]

“She’seight, Jensen,” Pooch repliedtestily, rubbing the sleeve of his jacket across his face to wipe away the lastremnants of snow.

“Andthree quarters!” Beth piped up, clearly offended to have her age sogrievously mislabeled. [Practically all kids do this, don’t they?]

“Yes,and three quarters,” Jake agreed, nodding seriously. [Again: actual nine-year-old Jake Jensen.] Beth grinned up athim and Jess fought an urge to shake her head. Sometimes she wasn’t sure whowas the older and more responsible of the two, but on most given days she’d beinclined to say Beth. [I agree with Jess.]

—

“He’sasleep?” Jess asked when Jolene came to stand next to her.

Jolenenodded, her smile soft and gentle, no doubt imagining the peaceful, sleepingface of her baby boy. Jess would have done the same and she couldn’t helpfeeling a tiny squeeze in her chest, almost longing for the days when she’d hadthat very same smile. However tiring and trying it had been to care for agrowing child — even with Jake’s help — she wouldn’t change it for the world.Nothing could ever quite compare, and to see Beth now, happy and laughing, madeit all worth it. [While I’m not a mother myself, I do think being one is incredibly important to Jess. I see her as incredibly protective of her family — not to mention devoted — and I couldn’t go through the fic without mentioning that. Admittedly, in lack of personal experience, I based most of this on things my mum has said.]

—

“Yourhusband is about to find out what happens when two Jensens gang up onhim,” Jess replied, taking another sip from her coffee cup. [Jess is so proud, sipping her coffee like a boss.]

“Oh,this I got to see.” Jolene looked almost disturbingly pleased, but shepaused for a second when she took note of the fourth person currently occupyingJess’ yard. “Is Cougar building a snowman?” she asked somewhatincredulous. [I HAD TO. I just… I had to. OF COURSE Cougar is building a snowman!]

“Thathe is,” Jess confirmed, hiding her grin behind her cup.

BecauseCougar was, in fact, building a snowman; with the same kind of calm patienceand ruthless precision that he devoted to every task he performed. He seemedcompletely unaware — or unbothered, more likely — by the increasingly unstablesituation between the other three out there in the snow with him. He just kepttweaking and adding adjustments to the impressively elaborate snowman. [I just really like the thought of Cougar putting a HUGE amount of effort into everything he does, especially things most people would find silly or childish. Like, he doesn’t give a single fuck about what other people might think because he has pride, dammit, and he’s not going to do a halfassed job just because the activity isn’t badass. Cougar is incredibly competent and devoted, is what I’m saying, and those things he finds worth his attention get ALL of his attention. Including snowmen.]

“Ithink Beth and Jake started it but got bored halfway through, so Cougar decidedto finish it,” Jess explained, her cheeks almost aching from how wide hergrin was getting. She just couldn’t help it.

It was adorable. [It really is adorable. Cougar always has Jake’s back, even if it involves finishing his snowman. Also, I genuinely think Cougar enjoys it, though he probably wouldn’t admit it. Making snowmen can be really therapeutic.]

She wasn’tashamed to admit that the first time she had met Cougar she had been slightlyintimidated by him. Or maybe that was the wrong word, considering how elusivehe was, but she had definitely been wary. She had more experience dealing withbrash, confident alpha males than she did someone who was quiet and subtle, butundoubtedly just as dangerous. It was unsettling to be met with someone she knew was calmly observing and analyzingeverything in his environment, to better make himself less noticeable and,consequentially, an even bigger threat. [The moment I decided to write from Jess’s POV, this was one of the parts I was looking forward to writing. I really, really wanted to know how Jess viewed Cougar, since she wouldn’t be as enamoured with him as Jake. She’s a fierce, protective woman so she would see more of Cougar’s flaws and be quite wary of his silences. I think she didn’t particularly like him at the start and it took her a while to really welcome Cougar into the family. And, honestly, I can’t blame her. Cougar is a terrifying man.]

She wasmore concerned about Cougar than she had ever been about Roque, because thatwas hostility she would see coming a mile away. Cougar — well, she probablywouldn’t even see it after the fact. [I am so with Jess on this. Roque can fuck shit up, definitely — and did — but Cougar is scary as fuck.]

Not thatCougar would ever harm her. Despite that he had never said anything to imply it— considering how little he spoke in general — Jess knew that Cougar regardedher and Beth as people he needed to protect at all cost. She thought that wasprobably both because of how much he had begun to care for them on a personallevel, and how much they meant to Jake. [Cougar would literally die for them, I’m sure. Because he’s dramatic like that. And I love that Jess sees through that. Jake can sometimes be a little blind because there are gaps in his confidence, but Jess knows what’s up.]

Cougarwould do anything for Jake. [Well. DUH.]

SometimesJess still couldn’t believe what she was seeing, but Cougar was unmistakablyand unapologetically head over heels in love with her dorky little brother. [Like, just imagine: Jake coming home at some point and just blurting out that he’s dating Cougar now. He probably gave Jess a heart attack because “oh my GOD Jake that might be a very bad idea”. And she wondered if she’s going to have to keep an extra eye on Cougar now because she will literally castrate him if he hurts her baby bother in any way. But then she sees them together — and the way Cougar is just so STUPIDLY in love — and it quickly changes to “I cannot believe these two are even real.” (same, Jess, same)]

Love might even be toosmall a word to describe the absolute devotion and affection Cougar felt forJake. [One of my favourite lines in this fic. I just… yes? I feel like this is true? I really can’t describe it in words. I try, but I feel like I fall short, every single time.]

—

The snowballfight took a drastic turn when Beth, in an attempt to get away from theonslaught of projectiles, ran to hide behind Cougar. [She learned this technique from her uncle.] This, of course, put himin the line of fire. The entire yard seemed to freeze when one of the snowballsintended for Beth hit Cougar in the side, making him pause in the middle ofadding the last finishing touches to his snowman. [I can very clearly picture this in my mind and, admittedly, I was giggling when I wrote it.]

Jess waspretty certain that you could hear a pin drop. [Pooch and Jake can see their lives flash before their eyes.]

Cougar wasthe first to move, turning to looking down at Beth. She was huddling behind himand her small hands — covered in a pair of pink mittens — were clinging to theedge of his coat. She was looking back up at him with her big, blue eyes, widewith sincerity and a wordless plea to avenge her honor. [This is also a technique she learned from her uncle. Cougar has literally no defenses, whatsoever, against the Jensen Puppy Eyes™, no matter if they’re from Jake himself or his niece. Cougar is so bad at this.]

Maybe Jessshould ask if Beth wanted to take acting classes? She was ruthless. And quite a natural talent, by the looks of it.

Cougar seemedalmost curious at first — as if he couldn’t quite grasp what she was doing —but eventually just smiled and patted her head comfortingly, obviously havingcome to a decision. [Cougar being extra kind to kids will forever be one of my headcanons. It just suits him.]

He thenturned to face the two grown men standing a couple of feet away. The smile was nowherein sight. And judging on the nearly identical looks of dread on both Jake’s andPooch’s faces those meager feet between them clearly wasn’t enough. An entirecontinent might not have been enough. [Considering that this is Cougar we’re talking about, an entire continent is definitely not enough.]

Cougar raisedan eyebrow and Jake and Pooch hastily pointed at each other. It was difficultto say who was the culprit; both of them looked pretty guilty. [Since I don’t actually reveal this in the fic, allow me to do so now: it was Pooch. Jake threw a snowball as well, but missed. So Pooch is actually the one to blame.]

Jake clearedhis throat, weighting insecurely on his heels.

“Whoa,hey man.” His smile was just this side of terrified. “Cougar, let’stake a moment to calm down here, okay?”

“Yeah,”Pooch agreed readily, “let’s not do anything drastic.” [Their optimism in the face of certain death is quite admirable.]

Cougarremained silent before looking back at Beth who was — bless her soul —definitely aware of the strategic benefits of recruiting Cougar as her ally andprotector. [Who wouldn’t want Cougar as their protector? Like, honestly?] He was probably well aware of her scheming, but Cougar had alwaysbeen a bit of a softie when it came to Beth. He seemed to have a hard timedenying her anything, lavishing her with attention and affection that almostsurprised Jess with its intensity.

Every oncein a while she actually forgot that Cougar wasn’t related to Beth, since hetreated her so much like Jake did, albeit with a more mature and dependableundertone. [I think Cougar forgets that too. He would probably never call her his niece when asked, but in his head he’s sort of forgotten that he’s not actually related to her. Because he IS a huge softie when it comes to Beth and he’s so far gone that he can’t change that now. I am so, so fond of exploring the relationship between Cougar and Beth and I absolutely love to be able to show Cougar’s softer side like this. Cougar and kids, basically.]

—

It onlytook another couple of seconds before she saw the shift pass through them both.It was nothing too obvious — most people wouldn’t notice unless they knew bothJake and Cougar to the extent that Jess did — but every once in a while theyjust seemed to align.

There wasno other word for it.

Theirpostures eased, their expressions softened and ever so slowly they wouldgravitate towards each other. Just lean in an inch or two, melting into theother’s personal space as if it was the most natural thing in the world. Maybeit was. Sometimes it was eerie to see how synchronized they were, or howeffortlessly each could find the other and know what he wanted or needed. [These three paragraphs are no doubt my favourie in the entire fic. Being able to describe what I imagine Cougar and Jensen look like to an outsider was such a joy. How they fit together and how they just ARE. One of the reasons for why I love this ship — the biggest one, really — is how they, well, align, as Jess put it. They match. They’re never far apart. They’re so in tune with each other that they don’t need words. There is something so incredibly beautiful about that and I loved being able to describe it.]

Like now,when Cougar pulled off one of his gloves to wipe away some lingering snow fromJake’s face, his touch so achingly gentle that it almost made Jess’ throatseize up, just from watching it. She couldn’t hear what they were saying — theywere speaking much too low for that — but there was no mistaking the reverencein Cougar’s eyes and the awed, breathless love coloring Jake’s smile. [I wrote this damned thing and my heart still squeezes from how sweet and pure this is. THE GENTLENESS. THE CARE. THE LOVE. Kill me now.]

“I’mglad they’re happy though,” Jolene continued, just as softly. [SAME, JOLENE. SAME.]

Jess wasn’tsure if Jolene was seeing the same thing she was seeing, but she could donothing but nod in agreement.

It hadworried her at first, when she had noticed the feelings her brother harboredfor Cougar. Jake, despite being a trained soldier with more kills to his namethan Jess even wanted to consider, was trusting and emotionally vulnerable. Hewanted to be loved so badly that he didn’t know how to hold back — how to guardhimself against heartbreak and betrayal. He could so easily be taken advantageof, and before Jess got to know Cougar she feared that he was the kind ofperson who would. She feared that there wouldn’t be much left of Jake’s heart,if Cougar decided to crush him. [I love Jake. I just do. And I love the insecurities and vulnerabilities you can give him. He is a very happy and dorky person, but he’s far from one-dimensional. The fact that he wants to be loved so badly just breaks my heart some days, and I can only imagine what it feels like for Jess. Jake is precious and needs to be protected at all costs. Fortunately, Cougar agrees.]

But ofcourse Cougar hadn’t. [He would rather die than hurt Jake. We all know this.]

Since thenJess had learned that not only was Cougar a much better man than she had evergiven him credit for, but he was as committed and sincere as Jake — maybe evenmore so. Cougar seemed to love Jake with every fiber of his being, and despitetheir differences Jess could tell that they fit each other seamlessly. [Again, Cougar doesn’t do things by halves. He’s an all-in kind of a guy and, when it comes to Jake, I think he’s in more deeply than ever. I’m pretty sure they love each other equally, but Cougar just does everything so intensely that it’s impossible to ignore just how in love he is.]

They had aneffortless quality to them that few couples ever achieved. [Another reason why I love this ship!]

How onearth someone like Cougar could put up with Jake was a bit of a mysterysometimes, but on the other hand Jess knew that they weren’t the same inprivate. She knew that Jake gave as much as Cougar did. She had heard it, thatnight when she had startled awake — not really knowing why — until she hadrealized that she had been woken by Cougar’s scream.

Jess knewall about the nightmares a soldier could get from his service — she had sat upwith Jake after some of his — and when she had quietly made her way towards theguestroom, just to make sure that they were okay, she hadn’t been surprised tohear the soft, low mumble of Jake’s voice. Soothing, sweet and unmistakablyloving. [This was mostly some show and tell. Jess speaks a lot about how Cougar and Jake fit together and give each other support, so I wanted to give a more solid example.]

Shecouldn’t hear the exact words — that was none of her business — but she didn’tdoubt for a second that as much as Cougar seemed to be the centre around whichJake orbited like an overexcited moon, Cougar wouldn’t know what to do withoutJake there to comfort and ground him. [I am very fond of this paragraph. The balance between these two is just so fascinating and I love trying to put it into words. I’m veryproud of this imagery.]

Their relationship was nowhere near as uneven as some might think. [THIS is incredibly important to me. I want everyone to know that this isn’t just Cougar putting up with Jensen because he loves him, but, in fact, an equal relationship. They might need each other in different ways, but neither of them got the short straw. Fucking fight me.] Jess had beenhesitant at first, but it was things like this — seeing them there in the snow,sinking deeper into an intimacy that had nothing to do with physical touch, buteverything to do with belonging — that made her relax. [COUGAR AND JENSEN BELONG TOGETHER. PASS IT ON.]

Theirpersonalities might be almost complete polar opposites, but they fit togetherperfectly as a whole. What her brother had found in Cougar — what they hadfound in each other — was clearly not within the realms of what normal mortalshad. [Jess is such a romantic. And so am I. Just look at these two dorks. I love them.]

Call her aromantic, [This is what I get for not reading ahead — I genuinely made the comment above before reading this. SO YEAH. I AM CALLING HER A ROMANTIC.] but Jess just couldn’t see them any other way, now that she hadgotten used to them as an item. It wasn’t that they disappeared into the otheror even changed to fit as a whole; they just were. Simple as that. [Honestly, this is me speaking through Jess. I literally cannot unsee this ship. Whenever I watch the movie with a new person, I always forget that Cougar and Jensen isn’t a couple in canon and find it weird to have to point it out that I ship them. It’s it obvious? To me it just seems to natural. I am in so, so deep.]

She was actually kind of envious. [My question is: who isn’t?]

—

“Jake!Did you hear that?” Jess called out to her brother who had yet to movefrom where he lay sprawled in the snow. Granted that he would have to pushCougar off in that case, and he didn’t look very inclined to do so. “Hotchocolate!”

Jake showedthat he had heard by giving her a thumbs up, but didn’t even bother to lookaway from Cougar, whose hand now rested against the bright red scarf wrappedaround Jake’s neck. They got like that sometimes, lost in their own littleworld of gentle touches and softly spoken words. [I really, really wanted to point this out. I don’t think this comes across from Cougar or Jake’s POV, but there HAS to be moment when they just zone out everything else but each other. Like, the only voice they’ll really register is each other’s and they literally won’t notice if someone else tries to talk to them. My wife and I have done this a couple of times.]

Jess shookher head and shooed Pooch and Beth into the house, but she couldn’t helplooking back over her shoulder. She still couldn’t hear what they were saying,but the tenderness was unmistakable as Jake took Cougar’s hand to kiss his nodoubt cold fingers. [Just look at these dorks.]

Thosestupid, adorable dorks. [I am clearly Jess in this situation.]

—

As weird asit had seemed at first, Jess was happy for Jake. She hadn’t seriously believedthat it would ever work out when someone as loud and energetic as Jake was in arelationship with someone as calm and steadfast as Cougar, but it did. Theywere happy and stupidly in love. [I love ships like these, where you don’t think they’re going to fit because of their personalities but they actually fit perfectly. These two are one of the best examples of that and I absolutely LOVE how caring they are. Like, no matter how you view their relationship — romantic or platonic — there’s no denying that there is a HUGE amount of love and devotion between them. These two men love each other. Their relationship is built on trust and love, and that’s just wonderful.] The fact that they had a lot of other thingson their minds — things Jess wasn’t allowed to hear about since it would onlyput her in danger — obviously didn’t stop them from cherishing what they hadtogether. [Just a brief reminder that Max isn’t dead, so I can pretend that this fic actually has a plot.]

And seeingthe two of them come tumbling in through the door ten minutes later, both ofthem shivering slightly from the cold but so obviously content, made Jesssmile. It was just impossible not to, what with the way Jake hovered behindCougar, his nose buried in Cougar’s hair and a goofy smile on his lips. [These two are so in love and I can’t deal with it. I seriously can’t. Why do I write things that are so painfully cute? Reading this again makes me want to bang my head against my desk.]

And whenJake got bold enough to tug off his mittens and shove his hands in underCougar’s clothes to warm them — and Cougar didn’tpunch him in the face for it, or even elbow him — Jess knew that she didn’thave to worry about her brother’s heart anymore. It was safe with Cougar. Heseemed to understand exactly how precious and vulnerable Jake’s heart was, andhad no intention whatsoever of jeopardizing it.

The factwas proven further by how Cougar was struggling valiantly not to squirm fromJake’s cold hands, while Jake hummed happily and nuzzled Cougar’s ear, the big,stupid dork.

And if that wasn’t love,Jess didn’t know what was. [These three paragraphs, seriously. I feel bad for Cougar because cold hands against warm skin are the worst, but the fact that he chooses to endure it is just so adorable. He loves Jake so much. And I am so happy that I wrote this fic, even if I might have given myself a couple of cavities while rereading it. I am a sucker for fluff and this whole fic is just a huge ball of fluff. I am so proud.]

SO. That was unnecessarily long! And I’m aware that most of it is just me screaming about Jensen and Cougar, but who can blame me? I LOVE this ship so, so much.

Thank you, @scriggle-scraggle, for making the request. I hope you liked it!

#Amethystina Does Memes #DVD Commentary Meme #Amethystina Writes #The Snowball Fight #I honestly didn't expect this one to be picked #But I'm kinda glad it was #I haven't read it in YEARS #And had forgotten how sweet it is #scriggle-scraggle

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cipherr · 7 years

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TRIPLE THREAT also this is a lot but hopefully that’s fine ;3 Razhie: 6, 16, 40, 92; Sievve: 1, 23, 78, 86; Haveni: 9, 32, 44, 94 ! ♡

HOLY SHIT YOU DON’T MESS AROUND ok buckle the fuck up (again) :’D (also thank you so much i love how i can count on you to INDULGE

under the cut :’DD

Razhie’s first!

6. What do they like to wear?oooh man ok so, she definitely has different preferences depending on the situation (also She's Hot And She Knows It so that is used to her advantage a lot) so for basic infiltration she has her current outfit, which is that black body suit with the thin armor plating and knee-high boots. it allows for a lot of mobility with a very decent amount of protection, all while making her look like an Imperial that you don’t want to mess with (plus The Booty is A+) :’D and if she needs to look more commanding and intimidating, she’s happy to bust out that old high-collared chestplate with the long black cape, it’s definitely more conspicuous than her infiltration getup but more effective if she’s not doing a lot of actual spywork. in her downtime, she wears anything that’s snug and comfortable, and likely all black. black and gold is definitely Her Thing so that is her go-to if she’s, say, attending some lavish party for less-than-legitimate reasons :’D

16. What are they like when they’ve gotten too little sleep?THIS IS UNFORTUNATELY HER REALITY TOO MUCH OF THE TIME LMAO she becomes incredibly one-track-minded, because all of her mental capacity is focused on the task at hand. she’s not personable when she’s like this...like, at all...so trying to talk to her is like trying to talk to a wall. the best thing to do is just stay out of her way and let her accomplish her mission, because she won’t stop until she does. her patience is greatly reduced, and this is when she’s most likely to just shoot anyone that might be making things difficult, rather than try to be diplomatic about things.

40. Do they have any scars?HELL YEAH look you don’t live this long as a non-Force-using alien working for the Empire without getting banged up pretty bad :’) she’s been shot, stabbed, zapped by Sith lightning, operated on, tortured, shipwrecked, mauled by various alien fauna, buried alive, thrown from very high places on multiple occasions...it’s a wonder she has all her limbs intact. she doesn’t really have any extremely notable scars (yet...i can think of something that will be happening in her future tho lmao) rather her body is just kind of littered with various remnants of past battles. fortunately she’s been able to be patched up pretty quickly and efficiently, so none of them are particularly prominent, and you’d have to look pretty closely to even see them. but that, of course, can (and will) change :’D

92. What mood are they most often in?100% done :’D she’s Tired, had enough of everyone’s shit (in the Empire and otherwise) and generally just has no fucks left to give. it’s not that she’s bad-natured or anything, in fact she’s managed to get a dry sense of humor from the whole ordeal. she just doesn’t have time for anyone’s bullshit and she’s not afraid to make that known. she’s been through hell and back again, and betrayed more times than she’d care to count. all things considered...her attitude’s not bad LMAO

now for Sievve :D

1. What do they smell like?THIS IS A VERY INTERESTING QUESTION and i like it. Sievve is a very introspective person, and takes the meditation aspect of her daily routine very seriously. i’d imagine she keeps special oils, maybe that remind her of home or of Tython, that she uses when meditating in her chambers. it’s part of how she can stay so calm in all the chaos :’) her scents would probably remind you of the forests where she trained as a padawan, or maybe a dusty library (just filled with datacrons instead of books)all in all, i’d imagine she smells VERY NICE for a Jedi who’s so on-the-go with her saving-the-galaxy business, and all that :’D

23. Do they collect anything?since Jedi are ‘discouraged’ from keeping personal items and all, she doesn’t really collect much of anything, though i absolutely could see her keeping a stone from each planet she visits and lining her chambers with them. rather, she journals extensively, and uses a lot of her free time to catalog everything she learns about....well, everything :’) planets, species, cultures, histories, EVERYTHING. she values knowledge and learning and she’d spend entire days with the ancient noetikons that housed the old Masters and absorb everything they could possibly give her, if she could. all she wants out of her legacy is to pass on everything she’s learned to future generations. she firmly believes that a lot of conflict arises from lack of knowledge or understanding between peoples, so she hopes that through her life’s work she can prevent further conflicts from happening in the future, long after she’s gone. i love her ;w; so yeah, she collects knowledge, basically, and saves it all for future generations :3

78. How do they act when they’re particularly happy?awwww she’s just so damn good natured almost all the time while also being a reserved person, it’s almost kinda hard to imagine what she’d be like when she’s particularly happy :’D i just picture her as just....glowing, basically (not literally lmao) like her presence just radiates peace and calm and i think if she’s especially happy, it’s even more so, to the point where it’d probably be impossible to not be happy when you’re around her. SHE’S JUST SO GOOD -clutches chest-

86. Do they like sweet foods?yes, but she has the self-control to let sweets remain a delicacy :’D i think she’d prefer foods that are more aromatic, probably.

and lastlyyyyy, Haveni! c:

9. Describe the way that they sleep.HMM VERY INTERESTING QUESTION. she’s definitely a quiet sleeper, and probably doesn’t move around much, if at all. she’s also a light sleeper, and any movement or sound could wake her up, alert. she’s a very on-her-toes type of person :’D

32. Pet peeves?dishonesty, absolutely. as a Jedi, she’s pretty damn good at being able to tell when someone’s lying to her, and she’d much rather they just cut that shit out from the start, because it never gets anyone anywhere. also this is probably a bit big for just a ‘pet peeve’ but threatening anyone under her care/on her team/anyone innocent at all is probably the best way to get under her skin AS I KNOW YOU HAVE SEEN LMAO

44. Why might someone love them?hmmm i’m not sure if this question is meant to be like, ‘why would a character from this universe love them’ or ‘why would an actual irl person love this character’ SO since the first one is kinda hard to answer (she’s romancing Doc atm but i’m not invested in that romance or anything, i’m basically just doing it bc it’s there lmAO) i’m gonna go with the second? idk :’Dand this is also just HARD TO ANSWER because as of yet she’s still pretty undeveloped, and i can really only speak for myself....idk. i think she’s just very intriguing? like i’ve always been into the notion of ‘grey’ Jedi (but not in the edgelord kind of way lmao) and Haveni is my best avenue of exploring that. like i have all sorts of problems with the Jedi philosophy and code, and while the Sith aren’t any better--they’re just two extremes--i think a middle ground would be the best way to be, and if i were a Force-sensitive in this universe, that’s probably how i would conduct myself :’D because like, for every insufferable Sith, there’s probably another insufferable Jedi, just for different reasons. but of course, for Haveni, there’s really no place for someone like her in this era... she’s probably gonna end up leaving (or getting kicked out of) the Jedi Order, and i can’t exactly see her becoming a true Sith either. so basically: i love her because i love watching characters walking that thin morality line, especially in a world that has two philosophies that are so cut-and-dry and at war with one another, where doing what SHE FEELS is The Right Thing doesn’t always line up with how she was raised. Haveni and Sievve are like... my two absolute favorite ways to explore Jedi characters, so i basically just have a lot of fun with them :’3but also, at a more personal level: Haveni is well-intentioned, extremely protective, noble-hearted, and wants above all else to do the right thing...she’s just conflicted on how to get there, because her instincts often clash with her training. she will valiantly throw herself in harm’s way to protect the innocent without a moment of hesitation, and justice is one of her main motivations. i know i have my biases, but there are a lot of Things I Love that can be found in Haveni :’D (SORRY THIS ONE PARTICULAR ANSWER ENDED UP SO LONG LMAO i just rambled on and on but that word-vomit was actually very satisfying so yeah)

94. Outlook on life?actually, fairly positive! her situation may look pretty grim--and she has a LOT of hardships ahead of her, and she knows this--but she also has a lot of confidence in her strength and abilities. she’s an incredibly skilled fighter, and the whole thing with Scourge and the “i have waited three hundred years to see the face that came to me in a vision--your face” bit...she believes in destiny, and she knows that whatever her destiny has in store for her, she’s definitely not ordinary, and she has the best fighting chance at survival out of anyone she knows. she’s got that self-confident-and-just-sliiiiightly-cocky attitude, and she wants to be the hero...that’s really all i’ve got for her so far, so we’ll see how all of this goes down :’D it’s gonna be a trip, i’m sure.

PHEW THAT TOOK A WHILE but i had so much fun, thanks so much for asking, i could literally do this all day long :’DD YOU’RE THE BEST

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kylecrane · 7 years

Text

Dying Light: So many questions!

-and a few answers.

Hi Taff!

I’ve been interested in your blog for a while and I’d like to pose some questions, because thinking and theorising is fun, and I’ve not got anyone to do either of those things with.

Hi! Oh dear, look at all 'dem questions! Thank you! @target-on-my-redshirt.

First of, thanks for the interest to begin with. I love chatting about Dying Light, especially things away from game mechanics, since I'm a fan of the concept and characters first, the gameplay second. Even if the gameplay is an absolute blast and a very high bar to reach for other games. But I digress.

I'll be answering them on here, since this is my main Dying Light blog, and I hope you don't mind me answering them in public. Let's see if we get a discussion going, hm?

Do you think that beyond the obvious potential for DLC, techland will release any concept art, any ideas that were dropped in the cutting floor or initial ideas for the story?

There's already some concept art out, and you can find it in my /concept art tag on here. Though I admit, it doesn't show anything much of the cut content, though we do see different types of costumes that aren't found in the finished product. What we do know about though is that originally we were meant to be following four characters (much like Dead Island), from which I believe Jade and Zere were meant to be playable characters? Maybe even Spike or Brecken, it's been a while since I've read up on that.

Though they eventually settled on focusing on Crane.

I think we can still see some remnants of cut story content though, as well as gameplay mechanics that ended up dropped. The most glaring one being the extra vial of Antizin that Crane pockets as he is ordered to destroy the stash, right along with the hint on a side quest to collect spent vials to stop people from filling them with potentially poisonous shit and passing it off for the good stuff. And then there's a bugged overlay message you get when a Boomer Bomber explodes under you as you crawl through a duct in the Oh Brother Where Art Thou quest. You get a message along the lines of "You've been infected, etc..." which leads me to believe that originally you were expected to keep yourself dosed with Antizin. Much like the malaria infection in Farcry (2?) and the necessity for Zombrex in Dead Rising 2. Another leftover from the original is a reference from a survivor to recognizing Crane from the *posters*, which'd indicate maybe at least one of the original playable characters was famous for something or the other. Unless, of course, there was a bounty system in which Rais put up badly drawn Crane posters.

I wonder if they always planned on having a classic generic tyrannical villain, or if sights were initially set higher.

Are we ever going to hear about the other characters backstory? I loved the addition of the random encounter explaining Spike, and we've heard a bit about Jade - what about the others? Will we see the addition of any new characters? Will we know anything new about the witch woman who brews you the potions?

I'd love a little more background reveal, to be fair, but I don't see it happening. Not in the original Dying Light anyway, even with their planned content drops that will include story expansions. Mostly because that content is free, and anything that'd involve dialogue would require them to either ditch Crane as the main character (plausible, but unlikely), or look for a less prolific voice actor to step in.

Will there ever be the inclusion of tie-ins to the new novel that recently released? Will they consider releasing a small playable story prequel of their own?

The novel, Nightmare Row, was not recently released. It was only recently translated though, if I remember right. Either way, Nightmare Row read more like what we originally saw the game being advertised as, with quite literally the shift of night and day making all the infected more dangerous, rather than focusing on a new mutation and the occasional hyped Biter/Viral. Which I'm fond of, since it gives the virus some time to mutate and start producing the range of variations we see in the game.

Do I think we get a tie-in mission? No. Much as I'd love to play a game that takes place at the cusps of an outbreak like this, I don't think that'll be part of the Content Drops. Again, I think of the cost of assets to get this done.

And is there any new concept ideas for DLC in terms of playable story beyond extra skin packs? Do you think there’s any whackier ideas for weapons or side missions? Will there be any additions that will be definitively linked to the story? The following was an absolutely incredible addition, but I feel that many players were let down by the ending - especially as it directly contradicts Jades wishes (she wanted to keep fighting, and wanted to die for her friends, but Crane accepts a nuclear detonation in the end? Alternatively, we learn that everyone will die in vain anyway or turn into nasty Zambies?

Zera has been working on a cure with Camden for the entire story - does this bear fruit? What is the global backlash against the GRE?

As of writing this, the new content drop #1 was announced (though they deleted the Tweet- sneaky!), so here's your answer on the special weapons. And the story? Ahm, well, I have my very own set of bones to pick with it, in particular the implications of leaving the cure with a single scientist in a run down lab without supplies, and how we are expected to believe that the world turned its back to Harran entirely. That and, yes, Crane's sudden inability to think as he detonates a nuclear warhead that would do absolutely jackshit to clear the infection, but likely only make it worse. I am however quite interested in anyone turning into a sentient volatile once they've inhaled the experimental gas, since that is a scary thought and would make for an interesting extra level of challenges in Dying Light 2. If Techland chooses to go down that route, of course. Then again, it also does a good job explaining the Night Hunter, so there is that.

If there is extra content or a sequel, where techland take it? What new challenges will be bought to Harran?

I'd think that Dying Light 2 will not be taking place in Harran, but take us somewhere else for a scenery change. And considering I am leaning towards Volakyle being the canon ending, we're likely going to see a much larger spread of the virus than in the original.

When we left off, Crane had the GRE's 'secret document' - will they try and retrieve it?

He did not any more. In fact, Rais transmitted the document to the public, which caused the GRE to get into quite a bit of trouble.

Did any of Rise's (yes I butchered the spelling of his name) men survive? We killed his right hand man but what about men who may have defected? Will they be a threat to the Tower? Do the survivors of the tower ever get saved? What if the document is stolen and released to the world? Will there be other isolated incidents? Or might it become a world wide spread as seen in the Resident Evil cinematic universe? Will the GRE redeem themselves and try to re-recruit Crane into helping them on another mission?

I have so many opinions about this. Enough to have written a 210k word story on the matter, which isn't even halfway done, and deals with pretty much all of the above. Including the "What now?" and a few tweaks here and there, in particular to the Following expansion.

But since I am not going to expect you to read it:

After Rais fell (hehe, literally), I'd have expected someone new to take charge, but have you seen the amount of men suddenly turned? How did he do that? Did he weaponize the virus at his workbench in a day? According to the game, pretty much all of his men are dead or turned, which I suppose was really just done for gameplay purposes, rather than having any real story meaning. So, far as I am concerned, his garrison lived on after his death, though I'd hope that the Tower would have taken advantage of the initial confusion to at least get a bit of the Antizin from them. Aside of that? I'd wager there are still enough scared assholes in the Zone to cause the Tower problems and to compete for food and medicine.

The GRE redeeming itself has already fallen flat in the Following, as they stopped the Antizin drops. That's a death sentence for everyone inside the Zone. I find that unlikely, but that's what the Following led us to believe. Camden creating a cure is unlikely too, since he doesn't have the staff or resources for it. But it does lend itself to the question on what they'll do without the cure, and what will happen when the the virus *does* get out, because really. It will. It *did,* with quarantines existing outside of Harran already where they evacuated other infected to.

Anyway, those are some questions I have thought about!

...and I tried to keep my answers short, and if you'd like to talk more, I'll happily pop into private messages on Tumblr.

#Dying Light #Lore #Research #Answers

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oumakokichi · 7 years

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what's your opinion on the "ouma is komaeda 2.0" debate? or, more aptly put: why is ouma NOT komaeda 2.0

I’ve written various pointsabout why Ouma and Komaeda are extremely different as characters in previousmeta, but all of them were a long time ago, and I don’t think I’ve everactually written an entire post that was only dedicated to talking about thetwo of them. So this is actually a really, really good question, and one that I’vebeen meaning to respond to for a while.

In order to go into depth aboutwhy the two of them are so different as characters (and most importantly, whyOuma isn’t just “Komaeda 2.0” or a “purple Komaeda clone” or anything of thesort), I’ll have to talk about spoilers for all of ndrv3. So please only readif you’re comfortable with that!

I suppose the most importantpoint to start with is the fact that Ouma is a deliberate subversion of Komaeda’scharacter (and Junko’s too, for that matter). The reason why they seem similar on a surface level islargely because that’s what you’re supposed to think, especially at first.

Komaeda is not exactly theantagonist of sdr2, but he is a force of conflict, someone who deliberatelyhinders the plot and stirs up chaos whenever possible. Ouma crafts this kind ofpersona for himself and steps into the role, but he is ultimately acting thepart. By constantly telling the group at large that he’s a liar, warning themnot to trust him, refusing to participate in their efforts to cooperate, hesucceeds in making himself seem much more antagonistic and hostile than heactually is.

The most important note ofdifference, however, is that whereas Komaeda poses a very real threat to hisclassmates because he really, genuinely looks down on them, Ouma is only everacting. His bluff is never anything more than a bluff, and his primary goal isto put an end to the killing game and all the chaos, death, and sufferingassociated with it. From start to finish, every single action that he takesproves this; even when he acts seemingly hostile or chaotic by “refusing tocooperate,” he also emphasizes that he does what he does “for everyone’s sake,”such as his plan to try and make the group watch their motive videos in Chapter2.

Because Ouma is a liar, it’simportant to note that many of the things he does or says change drastically inperspective on a rewatch. Things which seemed incomprehensible or downrightmean or aggressive on a first playthrough shift quite a lot when going throughthe game again. Every single line he has can be scrutinized and analyzed—and it’smuch easier on a second playthrough to see that even when he sets himself up asthough he’s a Komaeda-like figure early on, his actions truly are aimed towardstrying to maintain the group’s safety or breaking out of the influence Monokumahas over them.

To put their differences evenfurther into perspective, Komaeda is legitimately a threat to the group’ssafety as early as Chapter 1 of sdr2. Despite setting himself up to seem like arelatively laid-back, easygoing person who was agreeable despite maybe being atad too self-deprecating, he completely crushes this impression of himself inthe Chapter 1 trial, revealing his true colors as well as the fact that he canand will put everyone’s lives at risk if it’s for the sake of “hope.”

He’s a dangerous idealist, asubversion of everything Naegi was in dr1 as well as the beginning of thefranchise’s point that “hope” and “despair” are two sides of the same coin, andthat both can be lethal when taken to extremes. His adherence to the ideal ofhope is just as fanatical as Junko’s adherence to despair, and that’s preciselywhy Komaeda is such a threat. His persistence and loyalty to that ideal and hisdesperate need to see hope “triumphover” despair make him a threat right off the bat, because he is honestly, 100%willing to sacrifice other people’s lives in order to obtain that ideal.

Not only that, but he’sincredibly smart. Not to the point of having SHSL Analysis the way Junko,Kamukura, and arguably Ouma himself are, but Komaeda is still extremely cunningand intelligent. Whatever his own plans don’t account for, he knows hisinexplicable luck will fill in the gaps for him, and that serves to make himeven more dangerous than he would be otherwise. He’s effective, because he cancreate plans and take incredible risks and gambles in order to put them inaction, knowing that the outcome will work out the way he wants when it wouldn’tfor any normal person.

Ouma is not an idealist of anysort. He doesn’t embody “hope” or “despair,” but instead represents ndrv3’scentral theme: “lies.” As a result, he rejects the “hope vs. despair” themes ofthe previous games right from the start. Even when he’s literally set up by theHope’s Peak remember light in Chapter 5 to be a “Junko 2.0” figure, the “leaderof the Remnants of Despair,” it’s clear that he had no interest whatsoever in aconcept or ideal like “despair.” A large part of ndrv3 Chapter 6 is actuallyspent clearing up the false accusations of Ouma being “Junko’s successor,”objectively proving that he had no such interests.

Unlike Komaeda, who trulybelieves that “hope” is equivalent with “talent” and that people without suchtalents are disposable, just “stepping stones” along the way to his goals, Oumahas no such biases against people, regardless of their talents or lack thereof.He’s a realist, rather than an idealist, someone who grasps the necessities ofparanoia and suspicion in the killing game right away but who also values humanlives more than abstract concepts like “hope,” “despair,” or “talent.”

Ouma’s motive video, found inhis room in Chapter 6, shows that he and DICE were nothing more than a band ofpranksters who enjoyed “laughable crimes,” and that their most important mottowas a taboo against killing others. While he will retaliate and have peoplekilled if push comes to shove, as Chapter 4 shows when Miu tried to kill him,it’s not a course of action he wants to take, and he’s never one to make thefirst move. The fact that he calls himself a pacifist in his FTEs with Saiharafurther supports this, as does the fact that he refrains from punching Momotauntil Momota takes a second swing athim in Chapter 4.

There’s no denying that Ouma isdefinitely not harmless or weak;clearly, he can and will fight back when his back is up against the wall. He’sa master strategist and not someone anyone should take lightly as an enemy. Buthe’s not someone who instigates violence for no reason, nor does he enjoy it.Even though it was arguably in self-defense, manipulating Miu and Gonta intogetting killed in Chapter 4 still took a toll on him. Violating his own mottowith DICE and getting people killed, regardless of the fact that it wasindirectly, was still something he hated, and the fact that he refused to takethe same course of action in Chapter 5 is proof of that.

It’s important to note toothat, as I mentioned earlier, Ouma very likely has some variation of SHSLAnalysis. Like Junko and Kamukura, he displays an uncanny knack for predictingthe behavior and outcome of his classmates and the situations around them, aswell as a distaste for boredom and stagnation. “Boredom” has been associatedwith “knowing everything before it happens” for some time now in the DRfranchise, ever since dr0, and many lines in Ouma’s dialogue seem to indicatethat he is, in fact, bored by how much he’s able to predict everything aroundhim.

The fact that he writes roughly300-or-so page script in Chapter 5 in the span of only two hours also backs upthis theory. His script was able to predict nearly every single one of hisclassmates’ lines and responses in the entire trial, and according to Momota,it featured “multi-branching routes.” Clearly, this sort of script would beoutside the realm of possibility for a normal person, so it follows that histalent must be related to it.

My main point is this: whereKomaeda leaves everything to the whims of chance and luck, knowing that it willpull through in the end for him, Ouma leaves nothing to luck. He analyzes, strategizes, and plans everythingout, and when one plan falls through, he immediately comes up with another oneon the spot in order to try and lessen the damages. He’s not a gambling man andunlikely to take any risks unless he’s 100% sure he can win—though he willcertainly bluff and claim that he’s “betting it all on the line.”

Even his FTEs with Saihara areproof of this: despite seeming like he’s playing games entirely based on chanceor luck, Ouma manipulates the outcome every step of the way, and eventuallyloses on purpose in order to let Saihara win. His ultimate advice is to “win agame without playing it,” which turns out to be exactly what Saihara and the othersurvivors do in order to put an end to the killing game once and for all inChapter 6. Where Komaeda would undoubtedly take any bet because he would knowfrom the start that he’d be the most likely to win it, Ouma refuses to play bythe rules of anyone else’s games but his own, and tries to find any loopholesor workarounds possible, even to the point of snatching the game away from thereal ringleader and trying to grind it to a halt in Chapter 5.

Ouma wants to seem like Komaedaon the surface: dangerous, chaotic, and willing to sacrifice the lives ofothers for his own needs. Not only does this make him seem like a bigger andbadder threat than he really is, which keeps his classmates on their toes andprevents them from getting complacent, but it also plays up the role that boththe ringleader and the audience very likely expected him to play. By actinglike such a huge, chaotic presence in the group, Ouma was able to disguise thefact that his real aim was to end the killing game itself until very late intoChapter 5.

I have no doubt the audience probablyloved the façade he put on, especiallyat first. The audience, the ringleader, and Monokuma himself all prioritizeanything at all that will make the killing game more exciting—and from theirperspective, a character who seems dedicated to showing up, playing thevillain, and ruining everyone’s efforts to get along and be friends andcooperate would be extremely entertaining. Such characters prevent the gamefrom getting “too boring,” just as Komaeda prevented the rest of the sdr2characters from fully cooperating with one another by constantly interferingwith them in order to “try and witness their hope” for himself.

But by playing into that roleand pretending to be a Komaeda-like character, it was the perfect way for Oumato downplay his real objectives. Acting like he was enjoying the killing gamewas, as he admits in Chapter 5 before his death, “a lie that he had to tellhimself in order to survive.” Without that lie in place, he wouldn’t have beenable to act the part, or to avoid attracting the ringleader’s attention muchearlier, as he points out as early as Chapter 2 that Monokuma always shows upto “torment” the group whenever they try to openly cooperate and rely on oneanother.

I understand why people assumethat their characters are similar, but Ouma and Komaeda are incredibly different once you scratchthe surface. Just as Komaeda was an intentional subversion of themes and motifsbrought up by Naegi in dr1, Ouma himself is a deliberate subversion of Komaeda’scharacter, as well as many of the themes found in the entire Hope’s Peak arc,such as the “hope vs. despair” dichotomy.

Trying to say that he’s “theexact same character” or “just a rehash” misses the point entirely, and ignoresthe fact that viewing Ouma through the same lens as Komaeda glosses over manyof the actions he takes in-game in the later chapters. As an example, let’stake the fact that they both choose to commit suicide in Chapter 5 of theirrespective games.

Komaeda engineers his own deaththrough a method entirely of his own choosing, in order to “expose the traitor”among their group and further his own goal of witnessing hope win out overdespair. Ouma manipulates the circumstances of his own death in Chapter 5 ofndrv3, but not by choice; he didn’t foresee being poisoned by Maki because hegenuinely believed that even she wouldn’t want to continue the killing gameanymore after seeing “the truth of the outside world,” and he didn’t know themeans by which the ringleader would manipulate her into it. Where Komaeda’sdeath was arguably aimed to punish his classmates for their involvement withSHSL Despair, Ouma died intentionally in order to try and strike back at thereal ringleader, and in order to let Maki live and let Momota have a chance tosay his farewells with the rest of their classmates.

Just an example like this helpsto highlight the differences between them because once again, proving that ifyou scratch the surface of their actions and dialogue, they’re very differentcharacters with very different mindsets and objectives. Although their behavioris somewhat similar at times, they do what they do for very different reasons.

I feel that it’s important tonote that DR has always been a franchise based on the subversion ofpreestablished tropes and expectations. Dr1 took a handful of clichés andtropes and played around with them, sdr2 took what dr1 had to offer and subvertedupon that, and ndrv3 took both games and went even further with the subversion.

Trying to act like a charactercan’t be interesting or unique in their own right just because they havesurface-level similarities seems a pity to me, because many characters in DRhave these surface-level similarities with one another, many of which areaddressed and then turned on their head in the main story. Komaeda and Ouma areboth interesting characters in their own right, and while they certainly doseem to have a lot in common initially, I would say their differences vastlyoutweigh their similarities by the end.

This has gotten fairly long, soI’ll leave it at this for now. This was a really excellent question, so I hopeI’ve managed to express my thoughts on the matter. Thank you for asking, anon!

#ndrv3 #new danganronpa v3 #sdr2 #kokichi ouma #nagito komaeda #ndrv3 spoilers //#my meta #okay to reblog #anonymous

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izaswritings · 7 years

Text

YGO VRAINS fic: hurricane season

Synopsis: There's a new enemy on the horizon, but Yusaku no longer has to fight alone. This... has its downsides. Namely the fact his friends are more interested in bantering than helping.

Notes: I have no excuse for this. I just can't wait until they get to the friendship stage. Think of all the humorous team-ups, it'll be great. Revolver is there because lets be honest, he's probably going to get a redemption arc.

The last remnants of the storm are still swirling when Yusaku emerges from the cyclone, pieces of data streaming past him. It’s only code, a mess of zeros and ones, but the blocky and clear edges look enough like glass it takes effort to keep from flinching. His board is shaky beneath his feet; the latest storm is one of the strongest he’s passed through, and the effort of surviving in those raging winds took more that Yusaku had to give. It is skill and sheer will that keep him balanced on the board, and as he transitions back to the main river of the Data Storm, he finds his hands are shaking.

As always, exiting the cyclone leaves him breathless, and his opponent notices—laughs, too, that sort of loud cackling laughter that Ignis says belongs to “one of these weird American Disney villains” rather than an actual person.

“Look at you shiver, boy! Finally realizing you’re out of your depth?”

Yusaku kind of wants to sneer at that, but the sad thing is, it's not wrong. His opponent is stronger than expected for sure—Yusaku wouldn’t have risked such a volatile storm otherwise. It’s a shame, too, because he can’t remember the other duelist’s name, and he’s losing to the guy. Talk about embarrassing.

He’s saved from having to respond by a sharp crack of a whip, and holds out a hand gratefully. Blue Angel’s rope of pure blue energy wraps tight around his waist and yanks him through the air. His board slams down onto another stream, the data storm kicking up a multitude of colors in his wake. Her own board skates alongside his, and her face is flushed with exhaustion even as a glowing smile curls her lips.

“Having some trouble, Playmaker?”

“No,” Yusaku says, and casts his gaze behind her. No one is following them, even though when they separated he saw four of the men head after her. “You?”

She laughs. “Took them out in one fell swoop! Well, it’s what they get for underestimating me.”

He can’t help but smile at her glowing pride, even as his heart sinks. At this rate, he’s the only one still fighting--the others will never let him hear the end of it.

He used to live such a quiet, manageable life. Sometimes he still dreams of it.

“You know,” Blue Angel adds, still talking. “He thought I was your sidekick? Which, rude, everyone knows Ignis is your sidekick.”

What? Ignis gasps, reedy voice pitching high. I am not!

Blue Angel gives the AI a look—possibly pity, probably laughter. “I hate to break it to you…”

I’m not his sidekick! If anything, Go’s his sidekick.

Hah. No. “Go would kick your ass for saying that,” Yusaku shoots down flatly, not meeting either of their eyes—or, well. Eye, in Ignis’s case. “Try again. Or not at all. I don’t have a sidekick.”

“Superheroes have sidekicks!”

“I am not superhero, what part of me looks like a superhero?”

Blue Angel tsks. “Well, true… you do look more like a surfer.”

“A—A surfer —”

HAH! Ignis declares, so loud and sudden Yusaku nearly starts off his board. I got it! Revolver’s your sidekick!

“I’m what,” a new voice snaps, and Blue Angel puts her hand up to her mouth in a mock gasp. She’s probably hiding a smile. Yusaku kind of wants to hide. Just for a little while. They’re all terrible people and he hates that he knows them.

“Ignore Ignis, he’s talking nonsense.”

We’re deciding who Playmaker’s sidekick is. It’s you.

Revolver, for one glorious second, looks so absolutely disgusted by the idea he nearly slams into the side of a stray building. It’s hilarious and undignified and Yusaku can feel this… alien sensation trying to crawl up his throat. Laughter. Good god.

“I am no-one’s sidekick,” Revolver says delicately, and his voice is cool enough to freeze water. “Remember that, AI.”

De~ni~al~ is all Ignis sings in response, and through the mask Yusaku can see Revolver’s cheeks flush briefly in rage as his shoulders bristle and eyes narrow. Revolver has always been emotional in anger, but to see him react to something so petty…

Yusaku used to see this guy as the greatest threat to the virtual world. That was a thing, that definitely happened, he got scars from it and everything. And yet. Here they are, baiting each other with superhero references. This is actually his life.

“Regardless of who’s whose sidekick,” Blue Angel says, though the slight quirk of her lips fools no-one. “We have to move on—your friend and Go can’t hold down the fort forever, right?”

“Right,” Yusaku says. “I’ll hurry. His deck is simply… difficult.”

Blue Angel nods, and the lack of scorn on her face is the only reason Yusaku admits that much at all. It used to be that he never admitted any difficulties to anyone, but the past few months of working alongside Ignis and the others have changed him in ways Yusaku still doesn’t understand.

“It’s fine, you’ll get through it. Need any help?”

At this, Yusaku frowns. “No.”

Revolver’s eyes narrow, his mouth thinning. “If this takes too long— “

“It won’t.”

“Do not be prideful, Playmaker. I refuse to acknowledge someone as stupid as that.”

His shoulders are rising, his frown deepening into a scowl. He leans forward, eyes fixed on Revolver’s face, teeth near bared. “I don’t—"

A gloved hand shoves them apart, and Blue Angel’s voice snaps between them, as sudden and as striking as her whip. “We don’t have time for this, either.” She turns to Yusaku, smile gone flat and hard. “Need help or no?”

“I don’t—“ Yusaku starts, but sees the looks on her face and bites back the rest of his words, taking a long breath. Blue Angel is not the only one who is intolerable of his “do-it-myself” attitude, as Ignis calls it, but unlike Go and Kusanagi, and even Revolver, she’s one of the few who acts on it. If she thinks Yusaku is about to do something stupid, she will stay and make sure he doesn’t.

“I can finish this on my own,” Yusaku says, more calmly, and when Ignis gives a dissatisfied grumble from his wrist, amends, “ Ignis and I can finish this on our own. Go on ahead.”

She doesn’t look convinced. Neither does Revolver, but then, he’s always irritated by something. “If this is about pride— “

“It’s not,” Yusaku refutes, and sighs, anger draining. That’s concern on their faces, not scorn, and the sight makes him feel… tired, but also a bit guilty. “I have a plan. I can do this. Go ahead—I’ll catch up, and then we can take that bastard down together.”

It’s the last word that Blue Angel catches on, and her eyes widen before she smiles, small and soft and bright—one of her real smiles, not the showman one she’ll put on for the camera. “Okay,” she says, and though Revolver says nothing, his shoulders have relaxed, and his head tilts into a slight nod—recognition, maybe.

The understanding on her face—on all their faces, though Revolver looks impatient, but not mocking—is a relief he didn’t know he ever needed. They don’t understand, but they respect his choices. That’s enough. It’s more than enough.

Sometimes Yusaku can’t believe he’s standing here. Can’t believe that this is his life now—that these wild, emotional people, former enemies and strangers, have shouldered their way into his world so thoroughly. He can hardly remember what it was like to live without them, and that…

It scares him. But it also makes him smile.

“Leave it to us,” Yusaku says, and Ignis cackles by his side. He watches them leave for the next level, and feels oddly at peace.

Footsteps land behind him. A voice sneers, “Ready to be beaten, boy?” and Yusaku doesn’t bother to acknowledge him. He doesn’t know the man’s name, but that’s fine—this faceless opponent doesn’t matter in the end.

There’s a new storm on the horizon, and Yusaku refuses to let his—his friends, for that is what they are, isn’t it? —face it alone.

Ignis’s laughter is echoing in his ears, high-pitched and familiar, and Yusaku lets a rare smile curl his own lips—a smile not unlike Revolver’s, sharp and fierce and unfaltering.

“Only if you’re ready to lose,” Yusaku says, and Playmaker takes to the stage.

#ygo #ygo vrains #vrains #vrains fic #fujiki yuusaku #revolver #aoi zaizen #ignis #iza fanfic

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dirtyprojectors · 6 years

Text

“that’s a lifestyle” video

youtube

the animated video for “that’s a lifestyle” is out today. the director, kitty faingold, and i discussed bringing the song to life as a series of ethereal animated sketches, cronus the greek god, the visual metaphor of broken statues as a vanishing empire and much more . - dave

i feel like i haven’t seen animation like this … maybe ever, definitely since i saw bill plympton’s cartoons when i was a kid! what is your process — how do you make it look like that?

Basically, this animation was hand drawn with an HB pencil onto white paper and then photographed and put onto a timeline on a computer. I drew between six and eight drawings a second, which is not a lot and is why it looks jumpy and choppy - if you want a sleek look you need to draw more per second. But I’ve always liked lo brow & lo fi stuff, where you can see the artist’s hand at work and feel the human presence behind the piece. I like it when things look like they were made with the intense passion of a very dedicated amateur, it denotes enthusiasm, effort, aspiration, dreams. It’s flawed and personable and relatable. Maybe my taste is influenced by having lived in Latin America with it’s magical realism and it’s poetry of the mundane.

what’s the story you’re trying to tell in the video — and how does it relate to the story it seems like i’m trying to tell ?

The story is that we, the audience, are a spectral being hovering above a lake in front of a strange house that has infinite rooms. We float in through a window and decide to take a quick disembodied tour of the house that’s inhabited by a group of enchanted statues which some strange electric life force has animated for all eternity. They are the eerie marble remnants of an extinct civilisation, long annihilated, the silent survivors of a by-gone atomic end time. Like dancing shadows burnt into a wall by a nuclear blast. It’s tragic but also strangely optimistic - something survived, perhaps at the end of the world, human consciousness liberated of its material constraints, spread at light speed throughout the universe, and fuzzy bundles of memory, thought and emotion seeped into inert matter in distant galaxies and parallel universes, creating the world portrayed in this animation.

The video is an imagined outcome of the story that’s sung in the song, which as I interpret it, is about a society at the cusp of destruction, looking out from itself into its past and its future and wondering will we survive? or will the monster eat its young til they’re gone.

do you hate it when people ask you questions like that, because you have this feeling of like, ‘uhhhh, hopefully the work articulates the thing in a way that words cannot — that’s why it’s an animation and not a piece of prose; why are you asking me to bastardize & diminish what i’m doing??’ or do you feel like words / discourse provide a different and useful lens?

Haha! both I guess, most things that I make feel like they come from a place in my mind that doesn’t understand or speak a verbal language, and others are created in harmony with a more intellectually stimulated region of the mind, something with a narrative, a reference to some historical thing, for example. Words themselves can have power that goes beyond the literal meaning and melts into something more emotional. But I do often feel that contemporary art can be overly wordy and rationalised; when you explain or justify what you’ve created with a lengthy text, the piece looses elasticity and ossifies into a concrete message, or as Susan Sontag says “a sensibility is ineffable… a sensibility which can be crammed into the mold of a system.. has hardened into an idea.” I like this way of thinking about art as sensibility.

Also, when a piece of art or music has a precise explanation, it sort of becomes redundant, it’s just an illustration to accompany that other thing you’re saying. In art, I think, if words are used at all it should be to infuse the work with another layer of poetry, mystery and psychic life.

in this video, did you think much abt correlating image & sound — ie having the visual gestures harmonize with the movements of the music? (i think they go together super well…)

Yes, I wanted the images to resonate with and respond to the sound. On a macro scale, I wanted them to inhabit the same world, to belong together, so the look and feel of the images is enhanced by the sound of the song and vice versa. On a micro scale, the cuts are based on the rhythm of the song, and there are different moments in the story and particular characters and happenings that also relate to the specific moments or moods in the song.

when you’re working in this way, you’re the writer, director, artist and editor. does it feel natural and seamless to be in all these different roles, or do the imperatives of one role sometimes come into conflict with another ? like, does the draftsperson in you occasionally want to take things in a direction that the director simply can’t allow? if so, how do you resolve these conflicts?

That’s an interesting way of looking at it and very true; yes, I definitely had multiple voices in my mind whispering different things throughout the whole process - as an artist you are constantly engaged in an internal dialogue with many different elements of yourself and even with a fictional “other” that pretends to be an outside audience, so it’s challenging work. But this way of working does feel natural to me, I like being in control of as many aspects of my work as possible, so it doesn’t feel like a conflict that needs to be resolved, rather a conversation that’s had.

do you think there’s something special abt using old-school labor/time-intensive practices, even when there are readily available software/digital shortcuts ? like, maybe you value the specific unique feel to the finished work, or maybe you just get something you get from the process itself (eg meditative zen state that comes out of doing the rote repetition by hand?)

Yes, there is definitely something special about labour intensive work and, in this case, using analog rather than digital methods. On one hand, repetition as you say, let’s the mind wander into a meditative state which in a hyper stimulated world feels healthy and grounding. On the other, when you’re working purely in a digital realm you feel a sort of underlying existentialist horror as you are essentially one dimension removed from your work, or else you get a sense of plastic claustrophobia and you just need to run outside and roll around in some prickly grass or something! after a while of being on the computer you desperately need to feel the real material world around you, to feel phenomenologically “in” your body - to embody your reality. I think there is such a thing as a digital malaise akin to cabin fever. So I really enjoyed getting back to paper and pencil.

why roman / greek statuary? in general, where does your imagery come from? has it changed much over time, or from project to project, or do you find that there are leitmotifs and vibes that you return to consistently?

That was mainly based on the imagery that came to mind from the lyrics; words about an empire, a senator, a decaying civilization, violence, power, greed etc. Also when the song talks about a monster eating its children, I thought of Cronus the Greek God. I associate these things with the ancient classical world, and the marble skeleton of it that we have inherited. Also, surrealist works of art, for example by De Chirico, often feature statues and in particular greek/roman ones; there is evidently something about them that resonates with the subconscious mind, they are a meaningful symbol to us, they have a dreamlike and strange quality to them. This video was conjured up mainly by a stream of consciousness, which is a surrealist method for creating images. To the second question I would say both, each project is different as I am a pretty eclectic person and the world is full of new inspirations, but there is a river bed under the passing currents that doesn’t change much, a soil made up of a certain composition of minerals which, in my particular case, has surrealist foundations and an interest in myth, symbolism and the occult, and drawing eyes, people in trances, odd faces and strange places.

w the greek/roman statuary, do you feel like there’s some parallel you’re drawing to an idea of the vast, broken, vanishing empire — and the West today ? or maybe in general do u feel like that’s part of the operative fascination that vaporwave has with that imagery?

I definitely think that a broken statue is a clear visual metaphor for a vanishing empire, which might be why it populates the allegorical world of surrealism and vapourware as its digital extension- maybe for the last hundred years we’ve all felt on some subconscious plane a pending apocalypse, the world that we’ve created on the brink of an extinction level event. It makes sense, after the world wars, the cold war, the atomic/nuclear threats, climate threats, financial threats, etc. everything has seemed to be in a constant state of mortal danger for the past century! even our food is supposedly poisoning us, our clothes, bodies, water, air itself, everything is menacing and threatening and hostile, so it’s little wonder our art would express this sense of doom.

one of the things im kinda thinking out loud abt in the song is this question of, ‘in our insanely interconnected world, is it actually possible to draw our actions into congruence with our beliefs? what would that mean? and what does it mean if/when we can’t?’ sometimes it feels like the chains of production, ownership, causality etc are so deeply enmeshed that it’s impossible to chase down the global implications of our choices as consumers & citizens with any kind of confidence or accuracy … and that makes us feel powerless in the face of hideous injustices … like we’re all frogs in a pot of water slowly rising to a boil. so in the song, even though i don’t have a resolution or conveniently optimistic way of thinking about it, i hope there’s a value in articulating the feeling anyway. my question is, do you feel like art has a responsibility to be political? or do you feel like art is inherently political — and there might be something more human / empathetic / mysterious when art is fluid enough to evade the reduction into easy sloganeering ? for me it’s a question right now, because i’ve often landed in the latter camp, but this song woke up like this .. .

Yeah, it’s a tricky subject, politics and art. I guess that, in my opinion, your only responsibility as an artist is to give your audience your best and most genuine work, whatever that may be. The content of the work will vary hugely from artist to artist. There are many important things in the world, important parts of the experience of being, that don’t include politics at all, and perhaps are even antagonistic to it, so I don’t think that art has to be political. Sometimes it feels gratuitous and disingenuous when an artist injects some politics into their work or their discourse just because it’s in vogue. Lots of artists don’t have a clue about politics, they inhabit a parallel world of emotions, fairytales and daydreams! They might be an outsider, a rebel, or a romantic for example. Others are very passionate about being the voice of their own society, and are deeply entrenched in their cultural surroundings and make of their political ideas their body of work, in the hopes that their message might challenge certain prejudices or else that the audience will identify with the ideas and find expression for their own political thoughts. I don’t think one approach is more valid or moral than the other, as long as it’s genuine. However, on the other hand, anybody that has a visible social platform and access to a certain level of impact could be a useful tool to raise awareness for a number of social causes, but that’s something different.

how long did this video take you ?

Nearly a month! In fact I’d like to take the opportunity to thank Max Mannone who helped me sooooo much to make it in such a short time! he took all the photographs and digitised most of it, as well as giving me creative input. It’s super important to bounce off of someone you respect when you are working alone, because it’s such a self centred process that you can lose all perspective and start to drown in yourself!

do you like to revise a lot, or is it a first-thought-best-thought headspace ?

With a stream of consciousness type method definitely first-thought-best-thought although as I said above, bouncing off somebody else throughout the process is also good.

what kind of music do u like to listen to when you draw?

Well, for this video I listened to a lot of Dirty Projectors :-) I love this song, and instead of growing tired of it which can happen with repetition I grew to like it more and more! it’s definitely alive. I also have lots of synth stuff on my playlist like New Wave songs and Italo disco music. Probably because I came into the world during the eighties so it kind of feels like home. I actually listen to a lot of podcasts when I draw & animate, I like finding undiscovered youtube channels about weird topics particularly about magic, myths and the fascinating shadowy world of the occult which are all sources of inspiration.

thanks so much for this, kitty!! i love the animation a lot, and best of luck with future projects!

Thank you Dave! It was a real pleasure to work on this project, I love the song and hope the video did it justice :-) I'll look forward to hearing the new album!

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philippmichelreichold · 4 years

Link

Barrington J. Bayley, Collision Course/Collision with Chronos</tite> </head>< body><!--'"

Bailey follows a fairly unique approach to time travel stories. The vast majority deal with an alterable timeline that must either be changed or preserved to save the viewpoint character's way of life, the universe, etc; or with a multiverse where myriads of ways unfold and what ever decision a character might make, other versions of that character are deciding to do the same thing or its opposite. One example of the former is Poul Anderson's Time Patrol stories. There are many examples in Star Trek with its time loops and Predestination Paradoxes and Chiefs O'Brien avering their hatred for Temporal Mechanics. Larry Niven's All the Myriad Ways is an example of the latter. Catch that Zeppelin by Fritz Lieber and Joe Haldeman's Manifest Destiny offer alternate time lines within a multiverse. Another approach, my personal favorite, is that you can't change the past. This the premise of By the Time We got to Gaugamela by R Garcia y Robertson. You can go back, but whatever is about to happen has already happened. To paraphrase, all the history books agree that Alexander the Great is going to be alive tomorrow, but no such assurances are available for the time travailer in question. Bailey takes a totally different tack from any of these, one ""so original that it avoids all (most?) time-travel clichés".

Life within Upper Retort/Leisure Retort is more luxurious, more devoted to subtle esthetics, and "was probably the most refined culture the galaxy had to offer". (pg 57) It's inhabitants are wholly absorbed in advancing the arts and sciences, so absorbed that they tend to objectify people and ignore any human factor not connected with the research that holds their attention. (So self absorbed that the sounds of fighting with the Titanium Legions is less a survival threat than an annoying distraction.) Little physical labor is performed directly, there being machines to handle that sort of thing. The apparent social disparity between the two halves of Retort City is solved by their mastery of time. Envy is avoided by the Exchange of Generations.One sends one's children by way of a temporal differential tunnel to the opposite half of Retort City and receives one's grandchildren in return.Robert Gibson hits the nail firmly when he says the equanimity of the arrangement eliminates jealousy between Retort City's two halves. The Leisure Retort's inhabitants are not so self absorbed as to not offer to help the inhabitants of Earth deal with the impending collision.

Once again, nothing is easy. An evacuation of refugees is impractical on religious grounds. The Titan dominated society could never abandon Mother Earth. It is unfeasible logistically as not Retort City lacks the lift capability. Divertimg the time streams is beyond their science. They are not sufficient to the task and must ask the Oblique Entity for its help-- a sort of deus ex machina.

Aliens are described in some stories as being too alien to comprehend. Most human motivations/conflicts begin with food safety and shelter and proceed along Maslow's hierarchy to greed status fulfilment and pleasure seeking. Niven's Kzini are motivated by status and the desire to acquire estates on which to hunt and raise families. The alien empires in Star Trek seem involved in dominance games characteristic of humans. I don't recall hearing an explanation for the behavior of the aliens in Independence Day unless it was pure revulsion. Certainly hatred was evident. All understandable as human like. The Oblique Entity may be beyond human comprehension by nature. No human definition fits and description is based only on vague and fleeting perceptions. No words suffice for it to explain its nature to humans. One common trait comes through clearly-- the enjoyment of entertainment. One of the human time travelers implores its assistance in saving the Earth. How does one obtain aid from someone who finds great entertainment value in the unfolding drama of one's plight?

Selected dramatis personae:

Leard Ascar- Earth's leading time scientist

Chairman of Panhumanic League

Grandfather of Hue Su Mueng

Herrick- Amhrak scientist inventor of remote, intferometry-based remote viewing

Rond Heshke- prominent archeologist

Hue Su Mueng- disgruntled Retort City malcontent

Hueh Shao father of Hue Su Mueng

Hwen Wu- Leisure Retort prime minister and old friend of Hueh Shao

Layella- Sobrie's "racially impure" girlfriend

Leader Limnich- leader of Titanium Legions and de facto ruler of Earth

Li Kim- friend of Hue Su Mueng

Li Li San- Retort City envoys to future Earth aliens

Blare Oblomot- assistant to Rond Heske at Hathar Ruins. brother of Sobrie. member of Panhumanic League

Sobrie Oblomot- member of Panhumanic League

Shiu Kung Chien- Retort City's leading expert on time. in contact with the Oblique Entity.

Titan-Lieutenant Gann- time travel tech officer

Titan-Lieutenant Hosk- time travel tech officer

Titan-Captain Brask

Titan-Major Brourne

Whang Yat-Sen Retore City envoy to future Earth aliens

Further reading about Barrington J. Bayley, Collision Course/Collision with Chronos

COLLISION WITH CHRONOS on Ovias

Astounding Worlds of Barrington J Bayley on Ovias

Review of Collision Course on Science Fiction Ruminations

Wryte Stuff-- Politics with a Difference - Science-Fictional Constitutions

Jesse's Review on Goodreads

Barrington J Bayley on Wikipedia

Barrington J Bayley # ISFDB

Barrington J. Bayley: Science-fiction writer who treated the human condition as a puzzle that must be solved

Book Review: The Fall of Chronopolis, Barrington J. Bayley (1974)

Book Review: Star Winds, Barrington J. Bayley (1978)

Book Review: Empire of Two Worlds, Barrington J. Bayley (1972)

The Zen Gun-Barrington J. Bayley (1983)

Review: Let the Galaxy Burn - Warhammer 40k Anthology

Obituary: Barrington J. Bayley

Barrington John Bayley on Fantastic Fiction

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