#the difference is that I came upon it because I found a bunch of samples of different soybean genetic lines at work

[botanyshitposts]

obscure underdesigned online scientific DNA databases chocked full long strings of genetic code printed out at length on the page carefully filed under each trait/gene/line giving me strange and complicated thoughts and feelings about the nature of life and biology like im seeing something i shouldnt but could build my own drought-resistant soybeans from scratch if i just reacted things in the right order in a test tube but also the horror and mystification that some of these genes are copyrighted by x company in x year and are documented on the site like a secret history of strange quiet things but the history spans public academic discoveries as well and the comfort that none of any of this truly belongs to us and never will my beloved

[anastasiabeaverhousen87]

Fever Dreams

NOTE: Sorry guys for the delay but work kept me from having free time but I was able to come up with this. someone requested a sick baby Danvers getting a fever after some stressful event and then being taken care by her sisters. Hope you like it, I now figured out I cannot do small stories or prompts. I kept writing until I saw the number of pages lol anyways, enjoy. 

word count: 5937

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You were discussing some ideas with your boss, Regina, she laughs at something you said when suddenly she received a call. She holds up her hand signaling for you to wait for a moment so she can take the call.

Regina: “yes? , yes she is here. Oh, I see. Yes, I understand. Ok, I’m sending her downstairs right away. No thanks are needed.” - her smile fell and started at you with sorrow in her eyes.  She walks to you and holds your hands looking straight into your eyes-

 Y/n; “was that about me?” - you asked afraid of the answer.

 Regina: “ y/n I need you to listen and don’t panic. There was a situation involving your sisters. I don’t know the details, but you are needed downstairs. Lena Luthor is here for you; you need to go with her. Don’t worry about work, please take off the time you need and don’t forget that whatever you need I’m here for you”

 At the mention of situation involving your sisters, you pale and basically ran from your boss’s office to the reception area where Lena Luthor was already waiting for you, her face hard and imposing. Not really reflecting any emotion. So, you couldn’t really get how bad the situation was.

 Y/n: “please tell me they’re are okay?” - you tear up not knowing what to expect.

 Lena grabs ahold of you and hugs you hard and in very calm and soft voice for only you able to hear says: “they’re alive. They were taken to the DEO. Their condition is unknown, I came for you as soon as I found out. Come on sweet girl. We need to go”

 You just nod and let Lena drag you into her car. Your mind and heart running a hounded miles per hour thinking of all worst-case scenarios possible. You are even dreading one them is dead or worse both and you are not being told the truth. You feel your anxiety rise and your hands are a tremble mess.

Lena notices but when you look at her, you schooled your emotions and try to look detached from your thoughts, you need to be strong for your sisters. You need to focus on them, and you can’t let Lena or anyone else worry over you on top of everything. So, you just swallow and bottle everything up.

 Y/n: “I’m okay Lena, I just need to see them” - you say in a monotonous tone and hold your hands in your lap.

 Lena: “I’m worry too sweetheart. But we are almost there” - she gives your arm a  gentle squeeze and turns to look at her phone. You know she must be running all possible scenarios and outcomes in her head; Lena is a very analytical person. You take a deep breath and try to comfort her; Lena needs you too.

 Y/n: “you know we are talking about the two most stubborn and powerful women we know. They are highly trained and one of them is basically indestructible. And the other is pretty much a ninja” - you give Lena a warm smile and you can see a hint of a smile on her and you grab her hand in yours.

 You both arrive at the DEO and you are immediately received by Jon and lets you know what happened and the current condition of both Danvers sisters.

 The mission was compromised, and Alex was taken out of the location unconscious, blood in the back of her head, a contusion and is currently in the intensive care unit because they are monitoring her heart. The worse of the attack was inflicted upon Kara. Somehow the unsubs got ahold of green Kryptonite lined spears and Kara was hit with 6 of them. She lost a lot of blood and she was currently in a coma due to the severity of the injuries and blood loss.

 Lena asked to be able to see Kara and foresee the blood transfusion with the blood the DEO was able to get from Kara previously and she kept guarded in her lab for situations such as this.

 You let her, not quite ready prepare to see Kara in such state. You also didn’t want Alex alone, so you asked to be taken to her.  They were in different areas for their treatments and would take a while before they could be placed in the same room.

 You are now siting next to Alex in the ICU, she has some bruises and cuts littering her arms and face. A bandage on the back of her head, she looks peacefully asleep. However, there’s a bunch of wires and tubes everywhere and they are keeping close watch on her heart rate and they have her under sedation. After a while of you holding your big sister hand, the door opens, and you can see Lena on the other side. you walk out of the ICU room to speak with her. She gives you a rundown of the status with Kara, and asks you if you want to see her while she stays with Alex. You nod and walk to your blonde superhero sister medical room. You steel yourself, prepare for what you are about to see and make sure you don’t show any anxiety or discomfort you sister can pick up on. They need to focus on healing, no worrying on their baby sister. You again put on a brave face and keep walking.

 When you enter the medical wing where they have the sunlamps installed, you are face with the vision of your powerful and bubbly blonde sister, she looks so still and small in the bed, she is covered with a white blanket but you can definitely  see bruises on her, bruises!!! She never bruises. She looks so pale, and there’s a bag of blood next to her arm, the transfusion they mentioned before. And you take a shuddering breath and walks further into the room, you place a gentle kiss on her forehead and sit next to her. You take her hand in yours, and you note she feels cold and she is never cold. She is quite the opposite; she is a furnace all the time. But her hands are cold, and she looks pale and she has bruises and cuts on her arms. You feel so sad and lost, she is supposed to be almost indestructible and somehow someone made sure to have available the one thing that could bring Supergirl to her knees, to hurt her …to kill her.

 You push your worries and anxiety away and try to calm and look this the positive way, they are here. They are both alive and they will recover from this. You stay with Kara for a long time, you are not sure how long, but after a while you are being asked to step out so they can check on Kara and move Alex from the ICU to Kara’s medical room.

 For the next two days you stay strong, keep a brave face and make sure to leave and get food and coffee for Lena and the team taking care of your sisters. You need to feel useful, make sure you don’t crumble under pressure and anxiety at looking at your sisters so beaten up. Alex woke up after 12 hours and she was very out of it for the concussion and looked terribly exhausted. Kara was doing better the sunlamps working their magic, but she did end up blowing off her powers and she was healing slower than usual, but on the mend. she was mostly recovered after 36 hours but was kept at the DEO anyways.

 You walk into one of the labs Lena is working on some samples to bring her lunch. She’s been working nonstop on getting a suit or artifact to make sure Kara never gets affected by kryptonite like this again. She has her tablet on her hand and looks furious.

 y/n: “knock knock… hi Lena, here I brought you lunch., I noticed you haven’t left this place so here. Salad, a chicken wrap and iced tea. Healthy enough right?”

 Lena changes her demeanor instantly and covers her tablet, facedown on the table.

 Lena: “Hi sweetie, you’re a Gods send, no I haven’t eaten so I’m starving. Thank you so much.” – she is about to dig into her food when there’s a phone call to one of the phones in the lab. She perks up immediately.

 Kara: “Kara woke up from her nap, do you mind if I go and say hello?  and then you can stay with her ill come back and eat lunch and you can have yours with Kara”

Y/n: “Of course, I don’t mind your dork, Ill stay here while you say hello and then we will switch spots.”

 Lena almost runs into the med bay to see Kara and she forgets to lock and take the tablet with her. You notice the tablet and got curious, whatever Lena was watching seemed to make her very mad, so you decided to be nosy and took the tablet. It was a video, you hit play and what you see is the worst things you could’ve witness.

 Is the footage from the mission, you can see how Kara is getting attacked by the spears, embedding into her skin like butter. She shouldn’t be hurt that easily and you see your sister bleed from different spots. Then there’s movement and lots of people getting hurt and all of sudden Alex and Jon run into the place Kara is kneeling and bleeding. Jon is now trying to control de attacker, Alex notices something and her eyes go wide with worry and gets in between whatever she is seeing and Kara. A sort of electric wave or shock hits Alex and she becomes airborne and then hits the floor hard, she is now unconscious on the floor. You can hear the most painful and devastating scream coming out of Kara, who is desperately trying to move to get to Alex the best she can with kryptonite om her body. She Is screaming Alex’s name and what follows makes your blood run cold.

[[Kara (voice from the video) “ Nooo  Alex!!! Jon help her heart just stopped!”-Jon finishes to subdue the enemy and runs towards Alex and you cant look away from the footage. Jon is shouting orders and he is doing CPR and Alex. Some agent runs with a black box and looks to be a defibrillator and they began to work on getting Alex back. She is basically dead; she has no heartbeat. They shock her 4 times before you can see Jon’s shoulders sag with relief and then Kara goes limp next to Alex. ]]

 You stop the video and lock the tablet. You have tears running down your cheeks, what you saw its just awful, you know your sisters are okay now, but they could’ve been killed, and they barely made it out there with their lives this time. how many times has this happened before? Are they always getting hurt like this? Would they die eventually on missions? Many scenarios began to pop up In your mind and how any day now you could lose them and become completely alone in the world. They are everything to you and now you just saw how bad things can get for them. You can breathe you feel like all air is leaving your lungs. So, you run, you don’t want for Kara or Alex finding out your saw that or that you need help, they don’t need to be looking out for you. You run to a led lined room and try to control your panic attack. You fall to the ground and pull your legs up towards your chest and try to control your breathing, you force yourself to steady your heart rate. You must control it; you need to shove it inside deep inside and don’t let it show. For them, you need to keep this from them.  After a very long time you feel yourself drifting out from exhaustion and then you sit there alone until you can feel more normal.  

 You find a restroom and clean your face and then you look at your reflection, you look haunted and exhausted. You wash your face and try to compose yourselves. You leave the room and then you see Lena walking towards you.

 Lena: “There you are! I’ve been trying to find you for almost an hour. Are you okay? Are you sick or hurt?” - Lena is looking at you from head to toes trying to see what’s wrong. You need to control it.

 y/n: “I’m fine Lena. I was waiting for you, but I was starting to get sleepy, so I just left to walk it off for a bit and clear my head. I guess time slipped from me”

 Lena didn’t press much, but you could see she didn’t buy it completely she looked suspicious of you but let it slide for now “Ok, that’s okay. Kara and Alex have been asking for you. Why don’t you go see them? They will be able to go home tomorrow”

 Y/N: “Yeah totally I’m om my way and finally and can’t wait to have them home. Are you coming or what?”

 You and Lena spend the afternoon with the Danvers sisters and Alex noticed something was off with you, so you tried to deflect and avoid getting any attention from them, they needed to focus on themselves. Not you.

 Alex: “Kiddo you look tire why don’t you just jump in bed with me and sleep for a while? Come on!”- the red head pats the bed next to her and you want it so bad, to lay there and be comforted by your sister but you can’t. You need to show them you are strong and can be the one looking out for them this time.

 y/n:”I’m not tired Alex, I’m okay. Do you need anything water, food or a snack?”

 Kara: “Sweet girl stop, we are good. But you do look a bit run down. You been here for days and you haven’t slept or eaten enough. Just rest for a little; if not with Alex come on, you can sleep with me, Please? I really could use on of your certified hugs? - Kara gives you the best puppy eyes she can muster.

 Alex “Hey, I asked first, and I want a hug too” – she pouts

 You chuckle at her antics and you can see Lena looks quite suspicious of you and is looking more at you than any of the remaining Danvers in the room. So you walk to Alex and  give her a hug and a kiss “I love you, but I will lay down with Kara because you still have burnt marks on your chest and I don’t want to hurt you”

Alex just pouts but she doesn’t really care about who you end up crashing on, she just wants you to rest and sleep for a while. So, you comply. Besides you lied, because you know Kara is always running hot, she hardly notices when you are running a fever and you can feel yourself getting a headache and you do feel a bit warm. But you think is just stress and if you sleep for a while it will go away.

 Kara opens her arms and smiles broadly “Come on little one, jump in and give me some sugar”

 You walk to Kara and get comfortable next to her and you inhale her scent, you can always find comfort in their smell and their touch. You let yourself drift off and then, you’re out like a light. You might be more tired than you pretended no to be.

 The room becomes silent for a few minutes.

 Alex: “Is she out?” - she asks Kara who nods in approval.

 Kara is running her fingers through y/n hair and Lena walks towards Kara and y/n.

 Lena: “She is out. Something is off with her. She’s been extremely quiet, not in a bad way but like she seems to be trying to avoid breaking down or look too preoccupied. She took into herself to run food and drink errands for everyone, trying to keep busy at all times. Even when she was siting with any of you, she would look a little detached.”  

 Alex: “she is deflecting, and she does looks exhausted. Poor thing. I bet it was awful on her getting both her sister hurt. She needs to rest too, and we will make that happened”

 Kara just hums in approval; she is too preoccupied looking down at y/n running her fingers through her hair and hummin softly a song. Lena just keeps watching Kara make soothing strokes on y/n.

 Lena: “well, I leave for now to make sure the fridge is stocked up and have your beds ready with fresh sheets. Alex, Kara and I think its better if you stay at Kara’s and Y/N for a few days.  y/n said you can have her room, I will stay with Kara and even tough y/n said she was taking the couch, she is most likely than not be using  you as her human teddy bear and sleep with you”

 Alex: “ yeah, I guess that’s the best. I want to keep a close eye on y/n. make sure she really is okay. And she will feel better if she has us around for the next couple of days”

 Y/n moves in her sleep and scrunches up her face in disapproval of the noises in the room.

 Kara just hums and keeps the soothing patterns “Shh sleep little one. You’re okay”

 Lena whispers “Ok I’m leaving I’ll be back in the morning to take you all home” – she then gives Kara a sweet kiss on her lips and runs down gently her fingers on y/n temple. –“Sleep good sweet girl”

 Kara “Good night baby. See you in the morning”

 Alex: “Good night Lena, thank you for everything. See you in the morning”

 Lena: “None needed Alex, it’s my pleasure besides who kept everyone motivated and going was here our sweet y/n. She deserves the credit for keeping us sane and fed.  Now she deserves a good night rest”

 Alex and Kara nod and say goodbye and continue to watch over y/n during the night. In the morning Lena arrives early so they all can leave. But she is concerns when she sees that y/n still asleep.

 Kara: “good morning my love. We are ready. I´ll carry the goober here I have pretty much all my strength back so I’m good to go. She woke up a little while ago to eat some fruit and a jell-O. But she pretty much passed out after that. She is completely exhausted”

 Kara is now wearing pants and looks like she just took a shower. y/n is passed out on the hospital bed slightly snoring next to Kara.

 Alex walks into the room also wearing DEO issued pants and carrying a small bag. “I’m ready to go”

 They all arrive at the Danvers apartment and settle down for the day. Kara carries y/n to her own room to let Alex in y/n room rest for a while. Being human she is not at 100% like she is. Lena and Kara end up in the kitchen deciding on lunch and Alex is now napping for a little bit as well.

 A little while after Kara walks into her room to check on y/n, she is still asleep which is now a bit worrisome.

 Kara: “y/n baby. Wake up. Come on, just wake up for a little bit to eat something”

 You began to stir in bed and give a cute yawn and waking up a bit more. You feel a headache and you don’t feel so good. But you remember what happened and notice you are in your sister room. You bolt upright.

 y/n: “what happened? what time is it? Why I’m I in your room?- you look frantic.

 Kara: “Calm down kiddo. We’re home. You were so tired, so we just let you sleep for a while. I brought you here to let you rest more.  And Alex took your room. Are you hungry?”

 y/n: “ohh ok, I guess I was more than tired than I thought. Yeah, I could eat”

 You walk to the kitchen next to Kara and you see Lena there platting some food.

 Lena “Hi there sleepy head, feeling better?” – Lena approaches you and gives you a peck on your cheek.

 Lena frowns at the warm feeling on your cheek and touches your forehead and cheeks with her hands.

 Lena: “Sweetie you feeling okay? You are a bit warm and your cheeks look a bit flush”

 Y/n: “I’m good, just tired. I think I’ll grab a bite and sleep some more”- you sit on one of the chairs at the counter and slump yourself on the table.

 Kara looks worried at you and she then looks back at Lena. “how warm, should I bring the thermometer?”

 You just grunt- “No Kara, I’m fine I just need food and more sleep. I’m okay no need to worry. You and Alex are the ones that were attacked and are recovering. I’m just sleep deprived”

 Kara: “y/n, don’t lie to me baby girl. Or I will go and get Alex to make sure you are really okay”

 y/n: “NO!!!, don’t bother her with this. Let her sleep, she needs it. I’m fine but if it does make you feel better bring the thermometer but just let Alex sleep”

 Lena and Kara look at you, confuse at your outburst. You seem to be a little on edge.

 Alex: “No need to worry about me sleeping. I’m up. What’s this all about?”

 Lena: “y/n feels a Little too warm and she seems tense”

 You give Lena a dirty look – “No I’m not, and I’m FINE. I just need more sleep to feel better and that’s all”

 Alex approaches you and feels your forehead and cheeks. She also puts her lips to your forehead, and you sigh in appreciation of having your sister near you. You rest your forehead on her shoulder and Alex just hold your near her.

 Alex: “You are a little warm, but nothing too bad. I’m giving you Tylenol for the headache and mild fever. Just eat something first”. - she hugs you for a little bit more and kisses your head and sits down next to you.

 After lunch Alex gave you Tylenol and the four of you ended up in the living room watching a movie. You avoided mentioning anything in regard the attack and the injuries your sisters sustain no wanted to let them know you saw what really happened to them. However, the movie you were all watching, was a Sci-Fi movie. Alex and Lena making remarks on how bad and unreal the effects were and you felt yourself tense at the images. There was one in particular, where a laser beam was aimed towards someone and you could see Alex being hit and then lying down on the ground dead. You couldn’t keep watching that it was all too raw. You could feel the anxiety and stress of those couple of days and you just turn into Alex to hold her close and hide your face in her neck, not wanting to keep watching or listening to the movie.

Lena noticed your demeanor change as well as your sisters. Kara got back her powers and could feel your heart rate increased and she paused the movie.

 Kara: “You okay little one?”- she asks but you just shrug and hide further into Alex.

 Alex is combing her fingers through your hair, but you nudge a bit to hard and you can feel Alex stiff a little and hiss in pain. You accidentally touched one of the burn marks on her chest.  You sit up and release your hold on Alex.

 You have tears in your eyes and feel so bad for hurting Alex: “I’m So sorry Alex. I, …I forgot you were still healing I didn’t mean it. I’m just tired.  I think I´ll just go to sleep; I don’t feel like watching the movie anymore. I’ll get the air mattress so you can still watch the movie or whatever you want. And whenever you are ready you can take the bed Alex. Good night” - you rambled nonstop and try to leave as fast as you can, but Alex grabs you by your waist and pulls you into her and prevent from you to run way.

 Alex: “hey hey none of that, you didn’t hurt me. It was an accident and I’m okay. Please calm down for a bit, take a deep breath. That’s it, deep breaths.” Alex holds you near and rubs up and down you back in a soothing way – “Don’t shut us out. You don’t have to pretend that what happened didn’t affected you and to be strong for us. We are okay, we are here with you and I know see us like that wasn’t easy for you. We know the risks but it’s different for you. So please let us in.”

 And that’s too much for you to handle and you just break down completely all the fears and anxiety you been building up for days now comes out through Gut-wrenching sobs that tore through your chest and you cling to Alex like a lifeline. You try to follow Alex’s instructions, but you just can’t, you feel tightening in your throat and you take short intakes of breath.  You starting to feel lightheaded and you faintly can hear her voice and now Kara’s, not sure who’s.

 You feel your legs being swept from under you and you know its Kara strong and caring arms carrying you.

 Alex: “Take her to the bedroom I’m getting her inhaler just keep trying to calm her down a little. Lena can you grab a cold compress and bring it to her room, please” – Alex says in a hurry and everyone moves.

  Kara: “Little one, I know I know please try to take a deep breath”- and you try but you start to cough and try to take a breath, but you keep choking.

 Alex: “I got it, here baby please take a puff” – you feel the inhaler being pressed to your mouth and try to get in the medication. You fail the first time and choke on air. “That’s Okay sweetie try again, here we go, breath in…” – this time you can get the medication in and you give rest to your burring lungs. A second time and you feel like you can breathe again.

 Kara: “that’s it little one, slow but deep breaths. Just like that” – Kara soothing voices echoes through your head as well as Alex’s.  You feel something cold being pressed to the back of your neck and forehead.

 You feel the relief of been able to breathe properly and you began to calm down a bit. Your sobs turn into sniffling and you are limp against Kara. But then you are being moved one more time, you feel a second pair of arms, Alex. Her soft and firm arms are embracing you and you feel more relaxed now. You want to apologize for the outburst, but you feel so very tired you can barely keep your eyelid opens anymore.

 Alex: “go to sleep sweet girl. We are here, you’re not alone and we are not going anywhere okay”

 Kara” Just sleep baby.”- you feel Kara fingers in run through your head and neck. And then you are out like a light.

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You can see Alex lying on the ground dead, her eyes wide and void. No life in them. Just Gone. And Kara next to her barely alive, you run to her and put her head on your lap. Tears are running down your cheeks and you feel your chin trebling. Kara is so pale and cold; she is barely breathing.  and you can see her eyes are so sad, she knows Alex is gone and now your about to lose Kara too. And then her eyes start to close. And you cant stand that,” Kara no, no, no,no,no please wake up. You can leave me, please hang on wake-up Kara”- but Kara is too weak and tries to give you a small smile “I’m sorry sweet girl…” and she is gone…

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y/n: “NOOOOOOOOOO!!!” – You bolt upright screaming and great tremor overtake you. Body wracked with an onslaught of sobs and tears. You try to move and then you feel arms around you.

 Kara runs into the room followed by Lena who notices you are being cradled by Alex and you look to be completely out of out of it. Sweat pouring down your face and body. Your cheeks red and blotchy.

 Alex: “her fever spiked, pass me the thermometer please”

 Lena presses the device to read the temperature on you and when there’s a beep 104°F Everyone’s eyes go wide with worry.

 Alex: “Kara take her to the bathroom; we need to lower her core temperature STAT”  

 You are mumbling incoherent things through choked sobs “No Kara, don’t leave, Alex dead. Please No…” -you keep crying and Kara takes you into the bathroom while Alex works on getting lukewarm water running in the bathtub, she steps inside and signals to Kara to lower you on her lap. You sister stripped you down to your underwear. You feel water on your body, and it feels like icy pricks all over and you try to move and scape the cold, but you can’t. you are being held down.

 Alex: “y/n baby please calm down; you are going to be fine. I’m here. We need to bring your temperature down” -she keeps holding you and trying to sooth you while Kara keep pouring water down your head, back, neck and arms. You stay in the water for a very long time, you are not sure for how long.

 y/n: “Why did you leave me Alex?” – you mumble softly and hide you face into the crook of her neck, Tears welled from deep inside and coursed down your cheeks.

 Alex and Kara look at loss, obviously they know their sister is hallucinating from the high fever.  

 Lena: “I Noticed something was off since that day at the DEO and I couldn’t find her. I forgot my tablet at the lab, and she was there. I wasn’t sure if she saw the footage but guessing from how she thinks you are dead; I think she took the tablet and watch the video from the mission”

 Alex nods and keeps trying to calm you down and bring down the fever “That’s okay sweet girl, I’m here. I’m here with you, I did not leave you” -she keeps her mantra of soft words and holding you.  “Lena do you have the a FeverAll suppository.?”

 Lena nods.

 Alex: “Okay, Kara I need you to take y/n I’m going to dry myself a little bit. Take her into her room and change her into a clean set of under wear and just gently remove the excess water, don’t dry her completely. That will keep her cool enough. Don’t put any pajamas on her, maybe just a lose tank top.  Lena if you could bring more cold compresses and water or if we have Pedialyte.  And just leave the medication in her night stand I will administrate that in a moment”

 Kara paces you in you bed and Lena walks in setting the things Alex requested on the nigh stand while touching your cheeks and forehead and you feel cooler to the touch. “She feels more cooler now, I’m going to leave the suppository here and the water. I´ll be in your room, so Alex and y/n have a little privacy for her to administrate the medication”

 Kara: “poor baby, she hates those. But they better for her. Ok Love I’ll be there in a bit. I just want to make sure she is okay and comfortable after Alex gets here”

 Lena: “Of course baby. Let me know if you need anything else”- Lena leans down to kiss your forehead and then kisses Kara and leaves the room.

 Alex walks in and checks y/n temp. still a mild fever, but not in comparison to what it was before the bath in lukewarm water.

Alex: “She is definitely cooler now, but I need to administrate the fever reducer suppository. Lower her underwear and Can you move her to lay on her left side please, and just bent her upper leg towards her abdomen?”

 You tense at Alex words; you really don’t like this kind of medication it’s too uncomfortable. You try to move away. Kara keeps you steady.

 Kara: “I know you don’t like them, and you don’t need to be embarrassed, this will help you feel better soon.” – you just looked at her with glazed eyes and sniff, resigned you knew she is right. But still you don’t like it.

 Alex put on a rubber glove and a bit of water-based lubricant on her finger to make things easier for you.

 Alex: “This will be quick I promise sweet girl just relax take a slow deep breath through your mouth”-you feel Alex push your leg a little bit more into your abdomen and Kara holds you still. You take a deep breath and you feel the uncomfortable sensation of the intrusion of a foreign object being pushed into your body that way. Alex is very gentle and does a quick job and waits a moment to prevent the expulsion of the suppository and then removes her glove and goes to wash her hands.

 Kara: “That was all. You did great little onel. Now close your eyes and relax, go back to sleep”

 Alex returns to the room and you are almost asleep on Kara, but when Kara sees Alex walk back into the room she moves you so you can still be lying down on your side but this time near Alex. The red head in turn gathers you in her arms and begins running a hand up and down your spine so you can relax and fall asleep. You feel Kara move from the bed and you tear up.

 Y/n: “Sissy can you stay too? Please, just tonight”- you don’t feel good and now you are definitely not trying to prove anything to anyone, you feel like shit and you want your sisters.

Kara: “Of course I can stay. Just let me go and say goodnight to Lena and I’ll be right back”

y/n: “okay”- you say in small voice and you began to move more into Alex. She holds you near and presses a cold compress to the back of your neck and face.

Alex: “Close your eyes baby, Kara will be right back. We are here and we are not leaving you sweet girl”- she keeps the soothing touches and you start to feel the heaviness of sleep and you are almost asleep when you feel the bed dip and a second touch on your temple.

Kara: “Lena says good night sweet girl and she promised to make chocolate chip pancakes in the morning, Yaaay” – Kara keeps her touch light and you feel her near, but not as close as Alex. They don’t want to overheat your skin and you feel their presence near you to be just perfect and you drifted-off into a dreamless sleep.

note II: all mistakes are mine, its late and I just finish this and post it like that. I need sleep.

[little-chattes]

Ok so I’ve done a complete re-read through and one thing that kept nagging at me was how little Gideon and Harrow’s relationship makes sense given its quite frankly abusive origins. Harrow spends her whole life making Gideon’s a living hell and Gideon just… forgives her. Total and complete forgiveness for an irredeemable girl.

At first I took the sudden shift in their relationship as lazy writing to rush along the end of the story, but that didn't make any sense either. Muir strikes me as an intensely purposeful writer. Then I remembered that Muir is also an intensely Catholic writer and it hit me. Muir isn’t writing a story about a healthy human relationship, oh no, she’s writing a story about Christ’s relationship with The Church… if Christ was a sword toting butch lesbian and The Church was a sardonic bone witch. Call it tender blasphemy. 

Now Gideon’s role as a Christ figure is fairly easy to parse out given that her dad is… God. But for the sake of self indulgence (I have to put my 15 year long flirtation with Christianity to use somehow) I’m going to go through all the parallels anyway. There are a LOT of them.

Let’s start at the very beginning (a very good place to start).

Miraculous Conception

Luke 1:34-38

34 But Mary said to the angel, “How will this be, since I [e]am a virgin?” 35 The angel answered and said to her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; for that reason also the [f]holy Child will be called the Son of God. 

Gideon is conceived by artificial means when one of God’s own servants (Mercy) delivers a sample of John’s genetic material to Wake, a ‘normal’ human woman who chooses to carry Gideon in her womb. Notably, the sample lives far beyond its point of expected viability, thus making the conception somewhat miraculous (“Only the sample was still active, no idea how considering it was twelve weeks after the fact” HTN 441). 

The Cuckold

Matthew 1:18-25

18 Now the birth of Jesus the [a]Messiah was as follows: when His mother Mary had been [b]betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be pregnant by the Holy Spirit. 19 And her husband Joseph, since he was a righteous man and did not want to disgrace her, planned to [c]send her away secretly. 

Gideon the First decides not to kill his lover, Wake, and releases her out the airlock (AND HE TOOK PITY ON ME! HE TOOK PITY ON ME! HE SAW ME AND HE TOOK PITY ON ME” from Harrow’s vision of Wake’s note, HTN 124) just as Joseph took pity on Mary, his betrothed, by deciding to divorce her quietly instead of making her infidelity public which would condemn her to death by public stoning (Deuteronomy 22:21). Gideon the First knew that Wake was pregnant and didn’t tell John because he thought the baby was his. Similarly, Joseph goes on to raise Jesus as his own son.

The Birth

Luke 2:7

And she gave birth to her firstborn son; and she wrapped Him in cloths, and laid Him in a [f]manger, because there was no [g]room for them in the inn.

 Neither baby Jesus nor baby Gideon were given a proper cradle, one being laid to rest in a manger where the animals ate and the other stuffed in a transplant bio-container (GTN 23). 

The Dead Children

16 When Herod realized that he had been outwitted by the Magi, he was furious, and he gave orders to kill all the boys in Bethlehem and its vicinity who were two years old and under, in accordance with the time he had learned from the Magi.

King Herod intends to kill the prophesied King of the Jews and instead of finding the specific baby, he just has a bunch of them slaughtered. However, Jesus escapes the slaughter of the innocents by Herod when his parents secret him away to Egypt.

 When the great aunts gas the nursery and kill the 200, Gideon is meant to die along with them but escapes her fate.

Now this event has a completely different biblical connotation for Harrow. 

Firstly, the murder of the 200 children represents Original Sin. In the bible, Adam and Eve disobeyed God in the Garden of Eden, and as their descendants, all of humankind is doomed to also bear the weight of that sin from the moment we are born until the day we die. This is a fact that is drilled into Christians as soon as we’re able to understand it, we are born wretched and unworthy sinners, and there’s nothing we can do ourselves to fix that. 

“I have tried to dismantle you, Gideon Nav! The Ninth House poisoned you, we trod you underfoot—I took you to this killing field as my slave—you refuse to die, and you pity me! Strike me down. You’ve won. I’ve lived my whole wretched life at your mercy, yours alone, and God knows I deserve to die at your hand. You are my only friend. I am undone without you.”

Harrow is a multitude, she is 200 children, the entire future of her house. Shes not just one human being,, she’s the whole damn church.

Naz/Nav

he went and lived in a town called Nazareth. So was fulfilled what was said through the prophets, that he would be called a Nazarene.

Although Gideon is not from the Ninth, she is given the Ninth name Nav when she arrives as a baby. Similarly, Jesus is known as Jesus of Nazareth, though that is not where he was born.

The Poor Bondservant

Jesus' role as a servant is emphasized many times in the bible. He was a carpenter's son born in a stable 

Philippians 2:5-8

Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross.

 Gideon is described as being made “a very small bondswoman” (GTN 24)

The Sword

Matthew 10:34

Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.

The Wretched Sinner

Harrow is wretched, self loathing, and cruel. 

She is in thrall of the enemy of god, a figure who was once gods most favoured warrior, cast into hell.

She is like the depiction of the sinner who loves the devil

It's important to note that Harrow isn’t a single person, she is a multitude, the entire future of her people condensed into one body. 

The Enemy of God

20 Then I saw an angel coming down from heaven, nholding in his hand the key to othe bottomless pit1 and a great chain. 2 And he seized pthe dragon, that ancient serpent, who is the devil and Satan, and qbound him for a thousand years, 3 and threw him into othe pit, and shut it and rsealed it over him, so that she might not deceive the nations any longer, until the thousand years were ended. After that he must be released for a little while.

Before the fall, Satan was described as a “guardian cherub” who resided in the garden with God (Ezekiel 28:14) 

(a funny aside, in the bible the devil is known as the great deceiver but in HTN Muir specifies that Alecto is incapable of lying)

A Life of Abuse 

Isaiah 53:3

"He was despised and rejected by mankind,

    a man of suffering, and familiar with pain.

Like one from whom people hide their faces

    he was despised, and we held him in low esteem”

They got up, drove him out of the town, and took him to the brow of the hill on which the town was built, in order to throw him off the cliff" (Luke 4:28–29).

Gideon lives a life of mockery and is abused by Harrow.

An Unlikely Savior

Despite the fact that Gideon does not fit the expected image of a Cavalier, Harrow chooses Gideon to be her sword and protector.

Despite the many openings Gideon has to make Harrow pay for the pain she caused her, she remains loyal to her

Trust

Harrow realizes that she cannot face the lyctor trials without Gideon, and places her trust in her

Christians are told they must place their trust in jesus in order to reach salvation

Purifying Water

Acts 2:38

Peter replied, "Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.

Harrow confesses her sins to Gideon and puts herself at her mercy

Gideon forgives Harrow totally and completely, she baptises her

One Flesh

Mark 10:8

and the two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two, but one flesh.

“The imagery and symbolism of marriage is applied to Christ and the body of believers known as the church. The church is comprised of those who have trusted in Jesus Christ as their personal Savior and have received eternal life. Christ, the Bridegroom, has sacrificially and lovingly chosen the church to be His bride” (x)

Ephesians 5:25-26

25 gHusbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and hgave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by ithe washing of water jwith the word,

They take the vow of necro and cav, one flesh one end

Gideon’s forgiveness of Harrow is reaffirmed

Harrow risks her life to stay and fight with Gideon, even if it means her death and thus the destruction of her death. Her love for Gideon is now greater than her love for the Body.

The Sacrifice

John 19:34

Instead, one of the soldiers pierced Jesus’ side with a spear, bringing a sudden flow of blood and water.

They will look on the one they have pierced'" (John 19:36–37).

Gideon chooses to die for Harrow, death by piercing

and when he had given thanks, he broke it and said, “This is my body, which is for you; do this in remembrance of me.” In the same way, after supper he took the cup, saying, “This cup is the new covenant in my blood; do this, whenever you drink it, in remembrance of me.” For whenever you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the Lord’s death until he comes.

In order to complete the lyctor process, Harrow both physically and spiritually consumes Gideon

Because of Gideon’s sacrifice, Harrow attains eternal life at the right hand of god

The Tomb

The Resurrection

1On the first day of the week, very early in the morning, the women came to the tomb, bringing the spices they had prepared. 2 They found the stone rolled away from the tomb, 3but when they entered, they did not find the body of the Lord Jesus

Harrow turns her body into a tomb for Gideon, a tomb fashioned after that on the Ninth

Resurrection on the Third Day

Thus it is written, and thus it was necessary for the Christ to suffer and to rise from the dead the third day, and that repentance and remission of sins should be preached in His name to all nations, beginning at Jerusalem. Luke 24:46-47 

“So many months had passed: and yet, at the same time, she had only lost Gideon Nav three days ago. It was the morning of the third day in a universe without her cavalier: it was the morning of the third day—and all the back of her brain could say, in exquisite agonies of amazement, was: She is dead. I will never see her again.” (HTN 374)

Just in case you missed this important piece of information, Muir repeats it three times.

Go, and tell them, then, that he that was dead is alive, and lives for evermore, and has the keys of death and the grave,"

[a-singleboat]

Virtual Reality

Word Count: 2.4k

Request: hi! if your taking requests, i was wondering if you could write a damien x reader, where they meet through Twitch? add anything else you want i always love everything you write, thanks so much!! - anon

Warning(s): like, one swear

It was a Thursday night when you first met him, or rather, heard of him. You had been streaming for five hours heading into your sixth when you decided it might be time for you to log off for the night. As per usual, you took at least thirty minutes at the end of your stream just to talk with your viewers, usually about how their lives were going in exchange for a story from your own day. 

Tonight, however, there was an influx of people asking if you’d ever heard of a streamer by the name of Damien Haas, which you hadn’t, and if you would do a collaboration with the man anytime soon. Apparently, your content was eerily similar and you were, and I quote, “Practically the female version of him, looks aside.” 

“Damien Haas…” you rolled yourself back closer to your desk, hands settled on your keyboard. You typed his name into the search bar, patiently waiting for Twitch to pull up his account. You clicked into the first one, making an impressed face at the purple checkmark next to his name. You squinted at the screen. “Is this him? In the profile picture with the LEDs in the background?” 

You glanced at your chat, chuckling as the viewers started spamming ‘yes’ and ‘oh my god it’s happening,’ and your personal favorite, ‘mom come pick me up the best crossover of 2020 is happening and im SCARED.’

“He plays a lot of Animal Crossing,” you observed, clicking on one of his videos and dragging the tab onto your main monitor so the stream could see it. You skipped through the beginning part, biting into a pretzel as you watched. 

“He’s kinda cute,” you commented, laughing as your stream freaked out once more. There were a few people commenting what looked like it could be a ship name though you ignored it. “Shame I’d never meet him, though.”

You paused his video, taking note of the time, before rolling out your shoulders. “I think it’s time for me to head out so I’m gonna end this stream with a huge thank you to you all for sticking with me through this entire stream and if you didn’t stay the entire time, I’m glad you decided to join in on the ride even halfway through. I’ll see you guys next time.”

You ended the stream, waving goodbye to your viewers before the light went out and you could relax the smile off your face. Don’t get it twisted, you loved streaming and you loved your viewers but just like any other job, it could get exhausting at times. You shut down your monitors, the screens turning blue before fading to black. You stretched, taking your phone up from its charger and launching yourself into bed, opening your phone and clicking on Twitter. 

Much like staying thirty minutes after you were done streaming to talk to viewers, you usually went on Twitter right after to answer questions and respond to DMs. This time, however, instead of opening the app to see a bunch of post-stream questions, your mentions were filled with the video clip of you saying, “He’s kinda cute,” as well as maybe a million people tagging both you and Damien in them. 

Well, shit. 

Soon enough, that was all that filled your timeline. You couldn’t move in one direction without running into another screencap of you admiring the man. God, you knew the consequences but something in the back of your mind was urging you to reach out to him.

After a few moments of contemplation, the lonely side of you won out, forcing you to message him against your better judgment. Without even thinking about it, you found his Twitter and sent this message:

Hey, I’m sorry about your mentions blowing up because of me tonight. My viewers recommended your Twitch to me and I spoke without thinking about it on Live. 

And with no expectation of his response, you fell asleep right there with your phone on your chest and the DM still open. 

You woke up the next morning with a sore neck and a dead phone, which was a terrible way to start your day. You rolled over, plugging your device into an outlet before crawling out of bed to start your day. When you weren’t streaming, you worked as a freelance editor for different YouTubers, helping their editors with their workload or even staying on as a Temp for different companies. Occasionally you edited the odd commercial here and there, but those gigs were rare. 

Most recently, you had received some material from a group of YouTubers, Smosh. This job was different, however, because if you did well on this you could be looking at a permanent place of employment through their parent company, Mythical Entertainment. 

You knew Mythical Entertainment, it was hard not to, especially since your aunt was one of the producers within the company, but tended to ignore everything the company did. The last you’d heard, they’d onboarded another YouTube group (which you did later find out to be Smosh, the same YouTubers whose video you were hired to edit). 

 After a quick shower and a half-assed attempt at a proper breakfast, you were ready to start your day. You situated yourself behind your monitors, opening the video clips that had been sent to you. The first was a sample video, something that gave you insight on what their editing style was actually like. 

But imagine your surprise when you’re staring down the same man you have called cute the night before, his approximately five-eleven stance taking up one-sixth of the space. He was standing next to a blond, who had been marked as “Shayne Topp.”

Despite there being five other people in frame, your eyes kept moving back to Damien’s figure, watching his mannerisms through the screen and laughing along to his jokes when they fell upon deaf ears. 

Your eyes slid over to your phone, now decently charged after sitting for so long. On your screen were dozens of notifications. There were maybe two from your mom, asking if you’d be coming home for dinner sometime that week but the majority came from Twitter. You picked up the device, unlocking and responding to your mom with a, “yes,” before opening Twitter. 

Nothing much had changed from the night prior. Your mentions were still being flooded with the video from last night but newer content had been ushered in, namely fan edits using footage from your streams and, you assumed, his. 

The only major difference, however, was the fact that Damien had responded to your DM from the night prior. The first message read: 

It’s really no problem! My stream had mentioned your name before, too.

Followed by the second:

P.S. I think you’re cute, too.

You couldn’t believe your eyes. Mr. Damien Haas, the man that you had made a thoughtless comment on stream about, also thought that you were cute. Suddenly, the fact that you had been staring at him for the past hour seemed less stalkerish and more like a blooming crush. You wrote back:

Aw, thanks! Have you seen the newer fan edits? They’re all so talented.

You cringed at yourself. A cute boy started talking to you and you’ve suddenly forgotten how to be suave, not that you really were in the first place. But still, you liked to think you had some tact when talking to people that you found attractive. 

Not even a moment later, there came a response. 

Yes, I have, he responded. And I agree! They are all very talented individuals. 

You looked from the monitor in front of you. You had about a quarter of the footage left to go through before you could start editing but this technically wasn’t due until the following night. Feeling emboldened by the fact that he had actually responded, you replied:

Are you going to TwitchCon on Friday? We should meet up or something. 

Anxiously you awaited his response, taking his silence as an opportunity to watch a bit more of the footage and take down notes according to the sample they’d given you. Roughly thirty minutes later is when the next response came in, reading as an affirmative to both questions. 

You didn’t respond, choosing to leave your social media for after you’d finished editing the video. Your heart still pounded, however. Just the thought that there was a possibility for the two of you to meet was, simply put, insane. You’d just heard of the guy the night before and decided that he was going to be your latest hyperfixation. 

But who could blame you? He was a nice, funny guy that showed the slightest bit of attraction towards you. It didn’t help that you were a sucker for guys that were nice to you. 

Fast forward to the Friday of TwitchCon, also known as the first day of TwitchCon. You and Damien had been talking steadily over Twitter DMs and just last night you had gained his phone number, giving you even more access to the man than you had before. But of course, who were you if you didn’t tease your fans with the prospect of you meeting. 

The night before, at the end of your stream, you’d given your fans the little tidbit of information that you and Damien were, in fact, planning on meeting up sometime during TwitchCon and would be greeting fans together for an hour at your booth. 

That sent Twitter into a frenzy, both of your combined fans getting your ship name to trend within the hour, which confused the hell out of a bunch of locals. 

It was nearing the time you and Damien had set to meet up. The plan was you’d meet around twelve for lunch, take an hour for yourselves, before going back to your booth and meeting with fans for an hour or so as promised. 

You had never been more nervous than you were in that moment. Not only were you about to meet your three-day-old crush but apparently a very popular YouTuber. You tried not to let the thought mess with your head. One of your friends, Wilbur Soot (who you played Minecraft with from time to time) was poking fun at you for being nervous about meeting a popular YouTuber. 

After three years of streaming and gaining a solid following, you’d think you’d be used to meeting other popular content creators. But because it was him, you found yourself unable to think straight. 

“What if I fuck up?” you asked Wilbur anxiously. He’d flown in from London for this event at your insistence and because you’d offered to pay half his airfare to get there and back. He didn’t have his own booth as his arrival was very last minute, but he didn’t mind. He signed the occasional poster though his main purpose was to provide you mental and emotional support. 

“You won’t fuck up,” he comforted, leafing through one of the comics a fan had given you. The entire thing was hand-drawn, which was an insane fact in itself. It looked professional, which was what blew you away when you’d received it. “Well, you won’t fuck up as badly as you did when you first met Schlatt.”

You groaned in embarrassment. “Don’t remind me.”

Long story short, you’d dumped a red in color slushy on the man accidentally after tripping over an unmarked cable. It really wasn’t your fault but the boys hadn’t let you live it down since then. 

Half a moment later, Wilbur was poking your side. “Is that him?” he asked, jabbing his pointer finger into your side while looking in the opposite direction. He was looking at a familiar figure walking down the hallway toward your booth. He stopped for a moment to take a photo with a fan, talking to them about something, before continuing on his way toward you. 

Your eyes locked and you gave him a smile while trying to beat Wilbur into no longer poking you. He stopped when you slapped his arm the first time, sticking his tongue at you before going on his phone. You rolled your eyes at his half-assed attempt of pretending he wasn’t about to start listening in on your conversation. 

“Hey, Y/n, right?” Damien asked as he approached. You nodded, reaching out for a handshake but becoming pleasantly surprised when he instead pulled you in for a hug. 

“You ready for lunch?” you asked glaring slightly at Wilbur as he made kissy faces over Damien’s shoulder. Luckily, Damien hadn’t noticed your moron of a best friend. 

“Yeah, I saw this sushi place on the way in if you wanted to try that?”

“I’d be down,” you agreed, reaching behind your table to grab your bag. Wilbur was set to meet with a few other Minecraft streamers, meaning you didn’t have to worry about him while you had lunch. You looked over your shoulder, making sure everything was set for you to leave before saying goodbye to Wilbur. 

Over the course of lunch, you and Damien had gotten to know each other pretty well. Once the conversation moved away from your fans and, well, work, and more into personal details, you found that you actually weren’t all that similar. For starters, Damien loved watching anime while your guilty pleasure was Gilmore Girls. The one show you both had a love for, however, was Avatar the Last Airbender, which made sense. 

Another thing was that he actually enjoyed being in front of the camera while you tolerated it on most days, really only putting on your face cam for the last thirty minutes on most days. Despite that, he still classified himself as an introvert. 

You returned back to your booth much later than you anticipated, thoroughly shocked at the line that had formed with Wilbur at the front of it, entertaining the fans that had shown up early to meet both you and Damien. 

“Y/n!” one fan called, pointing in your direction. Immediately, the entire line turned and gaped at the sight of you and Damien walking together. You greeted them happily, stopping for pictures and verbally promising that you’d stay until you got to meet everyone personally. 

“You really love your fans,” Damien observed as you put your things back down behind the table. Wilbur had set up shop on your right side, chatting with a few people at the front of the line. 

“I wouldn’t be anywhere without them,” you admitted, pulling a silver sharpie from your bag. You handed a gold one to Damien. “I also wouldn’t have gotten to meet you without them, which I’m still sorry about, by the way. Your feed must have been chaotic.”

“You have no idea,” he chuckled. “But everything happens for a reason.”

You nodded, grinning up at him. “Yes, they do.” 

Permanent

@beautiful-holland @toms-order @starlightfound @grandmascottlang @positiveparker @bippity-boppity-boopa @caswinchester2000 @andreasworlsboring101 @imladylunaticbitch​

[captainsourwolf]

I just want 100k words about small town garden shop owner link neal and frou frou lumberjack bakery owner rhett mclaughlin meeting for the first time in home depot

all of link’s water hoses froze over night because someone forgot to shut them off and put them away the day before so not only are the things frozen but his outdoor patio has a solid layer of ice covering it and inside there’s a mini ice rink by the potting soil so he has to go out and buy new hoses and maybe a space heater to speed things along

rhett has a busted exhaust vent over his best oven because it’s old and it gets the most use because it’s bigger and has more space for big batches of his mama’s best peanut butter cookies so he’s gotta buy a new exhaust vent or at least find a solution that will buy some time till the repair man can come

they meet only because link isn’t paying attention pushing his cart. he’s only in there for the hoses and space heater but he got distracted by a bunch of really neat gardening tools and threw them in and is now perusing the new shipment of fancy copper faucets. and because he’s not paying attention he rams his cart into this giant of a man rushing through the aisle and they collide and link’s temper nearly gets the best of him until he sees the wild hair and the beard and the red plaid paired with some stylish jeans and the apron Rhett forgot to take off under his coat.

rhett isn’t expecting to come in contact with someone so ready to fight and get scrappy over a buggy accident that was the other guy’s fault to being with. but he does and he looms a little bit until the guy backs off and they can properly introduce themselves after an apology. but to be honest after seeing the guy’s eyes and the stubble and the grey in his hair and the impressive build under such tight clothes he finds he doesn’t much care about being run over in the local home depot if it’s by someone so attractive.

rhett introduces himself first and then link and they end up finding out that their businesses are only two buildings away from each other. they leave the store with the promise to come check out the other’s shop. and it becomes this thing.

link visits rhett’s place first. rhett gives him a sample of the peanut butter cookies and link threatens to never leave if everything is as good as those cookies. then the next day rhett comes to the garden shop and link jokes he doesn’t have peanut butter cookies to offer but he does have a hot chocolate station set up in the front with his mama’s recipe. after that they’re both intrigued.

every week they find excuses to come visit each other. they find out they’re both from buies creek and both went to nc state a year apart and somehow have ended up in fuquay at the same time. every excuse to visit gets more and more ridiculous. like rhett pretending he needs tips on how to tell the different types of weeds a part because he has these weeds in his yard that never seem to die and ones that are pretty and he hates to kill. or link pretending he’s just there to check on the flowers on rhett’s tables because he thought they looked a little wilted the last time he was in there and he can’t stand to see a wilted flower.

they catch one pretty quick what the other is doing. finally rhett gets uo the nerve to ask link on a date and they meet up one weekend at the local diner and chat for hours over burgers and fries and dessert. turns out they have a lot more connections than they realized. like the fact rhett came to bc elementary in first grade from georgia or the fact link rode his bike to the very same river all the time. and yet somehow their paths never crossed. in a small town like buies creek it seems like they would’ve found each other eventually, but they never did. until now.

over time it’s like they never lived a life without knowing the other. they’re best friends already and one isn’t the same without the other. sometimes they both think they’d be fine never dating or becoming something more because it already feels like they’re half of something, like they’re an old married couple, like they were meant to find each other in any life. they spend as much time as possible together, their dogs jade and barbara meet and love each other instantly, they know each other’s quirks and the sounds they make and the way their eyes light up about something and the way their breathing changes when something is upsetting or exciting.

but link kisses rhett first when winter turns to spring and his garden shop blooms to life with fresh spring flowers and the butterflies and hummingbirds start to show. it’s over a plate of experimental desserts the bakery is trying out and rhett saves the best for last, a batch of chocolate chipless chocolate chip cookies because he remembers link telling him about them one night weeks ago and that despite the weirdness they’re his favorite kind of cookie. the fact rhett remembered and blushed as he told link about it is what makes link grab him by the apron straps and haul him across the table to kiss him square on the mouth.

the only thing that changes is that now they kiss and they do it all the time. in the back room at the garden shop when link is closing the place down and rhett is coming to pick him up and he can’t stand how cute link is in his clear frames and dirt smudged on his cheek and he has to kiss link, chin in his hand and back to the wall. at the corner table in the bakery when rhett has a break and the pie is fresh and he’s got a dollop of apple filling on his mustache so link just leans over and kisses it off and says he can’t believe how delicious the apple pie is at this one bakery he knows. or in link’s car after a movie when rhett is talking animatedly about the awful plot line and the fact the movie wasn’t even that scary and link grabs his hands and then his cheeks and kisses him sweetly until he calms down. or outside rhett’s front door one morning when link is picking him up because they’ve started carpooling and it’s still spring in north carolina so link is cold of course and he grabbed the wrong sweater so upon seeing the shivering man on his doorstep rhett squeezes his biceps and kisses link until he’s hot all over and doesn’t want to leave.

taking things slow isn’t in their wheelhouse. it’s been months since they met and only a couple of weeks since they started kissing every chance they got. but there’s this constant buzz under their skin for more. every time link turns those blue eyes on him rhett feels the tingling start low in his gut and he suddenly wants to know how dark those eyes can get when there’s a cock in link’s mouth. every time rhett lightly touches his fingertips to the nape of link’s neck and causes a shiver link is acutely aware of the thrumming in his veins and is desperate to know what those fingertips feel like on his inner thighs. and it just happens because rhett got his hands under link’s shirt that saturday afternoon and fitted his fingers perfectly in the divots between link’s ribs and then it was happening. clothes off and hands everywhere and mouths leaving burning hot trails, hands burning even hotter in unexplored but not unwelcome territory.

just like the kissing, they do this as much as possible too. it lights a fire in their souls and every chance they get they’re touching, they’re exploring, they’re fucking just as much as they’re making love. times when their off days line up and rhett gets link naked and bent over the kitchen counter and fucks him with his face pressed into the granite and the other hand on link’s waist. times when link gets rhett spread out on the bed and takes his time with his fingers and his tongue to get rhett worked up before sinking in nice and slow and wet and grinds into him till he’s begging. or the times when it’s a slow, sweet build up because they have all day or all night and nowhere else to be so they make it last with their hands clasped tight and sharing the same air because heaven forbid they separate for even two seconds.

everything feels like fate. like some invisible string that’s been tying them together and the universe finally decided to tighten up the slack. it feels like they never went a day not knowing each other, being with each other, and they know in some other life, some other universe maybe they did meet in first grade and time allowed them to slowly but purposefully come together. but in this life they came together in this way, with a garden shop and a bakery separated by two buildings and a random buggy crash in the local home depot and a lifetime of fate finally deciding they were ready to meet.

[tealin]

Basler to the Beardmore 3: The Beardmore Glacier

As usual, if the pictures aren't working for you, please go to the official blog to see everything formatted properly.

On leaving CTAM our practical business was completed for the day, so it was time at last to do some sightseeing. We were near the top of our glacier as it was, so we flew to the southern end of the mountain range to our east and then turned to round it, and suddenly, this was revealed:

I knew the Beardmore was huge. No one has made any underestimations of it, in my reading. What I was not expecting, with all the analogies of glaciers to rivers, was that the Beardmore was practically a lake, if not a sea. We had just been on such a wide plain of ice that I thought that must have been it, but the real thing caught my breath in its vastness.

I can try to explain how big it was by reminding you these photos are taken from a plane quite high up, but a far better analogy can be made with a picture. The Beardmore Glacier is, on average, about the same width as the Salt Lake Valley (a little over 25km), which is similarly flanked by mountain ranges. Helpfully, the latter has has a modern American city sprawled across it, providing a context that most people will find more relatable than plains of ice. So here is a similar angle of that:

Not only were we turning the corner here, but the ice was as well, and the force of that showed on the surface. See, ice is a fluid! From this angle you can easily see that the glacier ice is in fact a light blue. This is the natural colour of ice; if the ice cubes in your summer drink were big enough, they would be blue, too.

When Shackleton first explored the Beardmore he reported it to be blue ice all the way up, with frequent crevasses, an account on which Scott based his plans. Some freak weather deposited thick soft snow on the bottom half of the glacier in December 1911, hiding the hard slippery surface under a blanket of miserable heavy stuff to pull a sledge through. By the time they got up here they were clear of it; I mention this now because my shots of the lower Beardmore are all into the sun so you can’t see that, in 2019, it was blue ice down there as well.

The clear blue ice of the upper Beardmore was not free of difficulty, however. Where the glacier meets the polar plateau – or, rather, where the plateau flows into the glacier – the ice breaks up as it pours over submerged mountains and buckles on itself. These are the Shackleton Ice Falls. It was a tricky enough business finding a path through them on the way up; each returning party had a worse time here on their journey back down. When the Polar Party failed to return in autumn 1912, those who had been on the Southern Journey all thought they must have died in an accident here.

The mountain we had come around was of no less interest. We did a few loops of the area, so I got to see that it had an unusual bench of loose rock that had been caught and pulled along by the glacier into quite an impressive moraine.

I thought I knew what this must be when I saw it, but, not having seen any photos, I didn’t want to jump to conclusions. After some investigation upon arriving home* I’m pretty sure this is in fact the Mt Buckley moraine where the Polar Party stopped for half a day’s ‘geologizing’ after surviving the harrowing icefalls. This was most likely a scientific gloss on giving Taff Evans a rest, as his condition was already starting to worry Scott, but it was here that they found a fossil Glossopteris plant which would ultimately contribute to proving the theory of continental drift. 35 pounds of geological samples, mostly from this moraine, were found with the Polar Party’s belongings when the search party found their last camp the next summer.

After another loop or two (I began to suspect that Steve was enjoying himself) we set off down the length of the glacier. This is some way down from Mt Buckley, where there is a slight pinch and the Beardmore turns a little more due north. That makes the nearer mountain The Cloudmaker, so named because the cold dry air coming off the plateau meets the damper air of the lower elevations at this turn, and produces clouds and fog. The far one with the distinctive fang shape is Mt Kyffin. It’s in the background of one of my favourite historic photos but I was astonished how big it was in context, in an already big place.

You can also see, here, the different textures of the glacier surface. On the western side is a wide smooth path, which is the way ascending parties came. Down the middle was a vast labyrinth of the most hideous pressure. We hadn’t flown any closer to the ice falls than the photo above, but this gives you some idea why the explorers thought them so harrowing. The photo above is deceptive, because it looks like it’s taken from standing-human height on the ground – I am in fact a thousand feet up, in a plane. Looking down on the pressure, like this:

. . . was like flying over Manhattan:

As mentioned before, we had an incredibly clear and calm day at our disposal, so the Cloudmaker was off duty. Further down the glacier I got a stunning view of the smooth ‘highway’ on the west side, gleaming in the sun, with the mouth of the Beardmore ahead:

Around here we started to get into some turbulence, so instead of figuratively bouncing around the fuselage taking photos, I was instructed to strap in, in order not to do so literally. This prevented me from taking a bunch of glamour shots of Mt Kyffin, but that was providential, because it meant I saw this instead:

The two things I most wanted to get a sense of, on the Beardmore, were at the top and bottom: the Shackleton Ice Falls, as described above, and the feature known as The Gateway, a narrow pass at the bottom that allowed access onto the glacier without having to deal with the similarly hazardous glacier/ice shelf interface. There are few photos or sketches of this area from 1911, as explorers had their hands too full with heavy sledges sinking deep in the soft snow that wasn’t supposed to be there, but Bowers snapped this one of the dog teams turning back from the Gateway and I recognised it instantly.

The hazard they were supposed to be avoiding, by ascending via the Gateway, was a ‘chasm’ over which they never could have taken their sledges. What sort of chasm? Well, this is some idea:

With that, we had left the Beardmore behind, and were on our way back across the Barrier to home. It should have been a quiet and relatively boring flight, but there were some more points of interest along the way, so I’m not letting you off the plane yet!

*Photographic records of this part of the world are scanty, one reason why I needed to go myself, and I hope my going has contributed positively to that record. Some helpful sources for ID-in what was historically known as Mt Buckley have been:

https://antarctica.recollect.co.nz/nodes/index/q:GASCW/source:2

https://core.ac.uk/download/pdf/44290486.pdf

https://www.semanticscholar.org/paper/Re-examination-of-changes-in-fluvial-stacking-the-Sieger/241976bfe72a9748048652e5950aae7b07a882b0

https://d3i71xaburhd42.cloudfront.net/241976bfe72a9748048652e5950aae7b07a882b0/119-Figure47-1.png

If you have any further references, please do send them my way!

[crowleyellestair]

Payment - Emiel Regis (Witcher)

AN/// this man is my baby boy

Look, when I read the raid on Stygga, I shed a tear or two. Watching the first season with Vilgefortz has been a challenge.

Slow burn and spoilers to Baptism of Fire and DLC of Blood and Wine – Though there is canon divergence

 I wanna write more for my boy, so please feel free to request!

 After the Duchess had received word that the beast was defeated, her sister put to trial and Geralt had been paid, life became simple. There had been a reunion at the vineyard, and lost connections had been rebuilt. Everything had gone back to the way it was. Regis had been staying busy with helping his Witcher friend with anything he needed, but it seemed to him that Geralt only called upon him these days with trivial tasks. ‘Come to the lab and help with this new mutation’, or ‘an influx of new vines had sprouted, and there is work in tasting for the new batch’. While he wasn’t upset with his new peace, he was restless.

Regis wasn’t new to relaxing and waiting for the next adventure to sweep him away. However, something hung in the air. His feathered contacts seemed at ease and there was a decline in monster activity, but the man couldn’t shake it. The Witcher took notice, and had frequently brought it up, but Regis would just brush it off. Though, his slight change in behavior did enlighten him to Geralt’s shift in character.

They had been sitting in the green house, Regis trying ot help move small buds into the new beds. He helped manufacture new strains of plants, and the shift from their pots was a delicate task.

“I wouldn’t be asking if I didn’t think something was wrong.” The tone held its usual gruff, but it came out gentle. Geralt had sat back on his haunches, small shovel in hand as he stared at his friend. Regis tossed a small smile his way, shaking his head, barely giving him a glance. His hands dove into the soft dirt, creating a new hole.

“I’m aware, but I must disappoint in saying I’m fine. Truly, Geralt.” The grunt he received as a response was one of disbelief. After a moment of no movement from the Witcher, Regis gave him his full attention before needed to focus on moving the new sprout. He could see guilt in the amber eyes that shined at him. He sat back on his feet; hands folded in his lap as he waited for Geralt to sort his thoughts.

“Are you at peace?” The question had shocked, and confusion settled.

“With what are you referring to? It’s a nice day out, so I’d say so-.”

“You know that’s not what I meant.” Regis looked down, pursing his lips.

“I suppose I do.” There was a tense silence that befell the men.

“I meant… Is there anything you need?” The question brought on just as much confusion as the first.

The sun was beating down on the two of them, and had been for hours. It didn’t affect the two as one was a Witcher and the other a Vampire, but they had shed some layers. Both only dawned a shirt and pants, but it seemed as though Regis was sweating. The flowing shirt seemed to constrict under the microscope of his friend’s questioning.

“A reasoning for these questions, perhaps?” Geralt had sheathed the shovel into the earth, and rocked back to fully sit on the ground.

“You’ve… done a lot for me, Regis. Even if I was against it, you were there and willing to help.” The confession placed all these puzzle pieces into place. Regis gave a soft ‘ah’ before a gentle smile found him.

“The mundane tasks.” It was a statement was offered as a mercy to the Witcher. He knew that Geralt had a hard time explaining things of the topic at hand, and Regis wanted to spare him from having to explain what he’s been trying to do for him.

“It’s not just because of repayment.” The vampire nodded.

“I’m aware you value our friendship as much as I do. I wasn’t accusing.”  They sat looking at each other, Geralt looking more discontent than before. Geralt was right- Regis had sacrificed a lot for the man, but he never had held life as a checks and balance system. If he had, he would have already considered the debt paid. Dettlaff was fine and well, healing at his new home. Away from society, visiting only Regis and Geralt.

Regis would have laughed at the irony, considering Dettlaff had also been feeling like an inadequate friend. More so being his Blood Brother. The same inquiries had been brought up with him, and Regis couldn’t wrap his head around the shift. Though, Dettlaff seemed more determined after their conversation, which left the man slightly worried at what could unfold from that.

“I am at peace, Geralt. Thank you, but I don’t think I could find something I’d need. I promise to come to you if I do find that I need help, however.” That seemed to let Geralt’s shoulders drop, the thought of him coming to him setting him at ease.

They both had gone back to transferring the sprouts, and ended the conversation. And he had been answering honestly. Regis didn’t have a need that required fulfillment. He was happy with his station at the moment, and would be content for as long as it lasted. Though, it seemed that neither of the men who had asked him had dropped the subject. He had called in a few favors here and there from the Witcher. One day, he had brought Dettlaff to the vineyard for brunch, as odd as it seemed. Geralt wasn’t friends with the vampire, but he was tolerant. Duty had called to Regis on a day he had set aside to visit his brother, so he left Geralt to watch him after their brunch.

When the time came to help Dettlaff back to his residence, it seemed that Geralt had grown a liking to the man. It brought a smile to Regis’ face, but there was still something in the air that was setting him off. Dettlaff would frequently smile to himself on the way back, reminiscing on the conversation he had with Geralt. He wouldn’t let Regis in on his thoughts, but it definitely didn’t help with the stale feeling eating at him. Luckily, he had been open about a few things after the constant pressure.

“I didn’t think you would be apart of a ‘gang’.” The night didn’t hide the shocked expression from Dettlaff.

“Well, it isn’t very different than a pack. And I wasn’t necessarily there all of the time.”

“I would say it was more than that. You stirred trouble on a human level.” Regis hummed at his choice of words, before giving him a raised brow. It should have been obvious to the other that he didn’t confine himself to ‘human’ ‘vampire’ traditions. There was also the question of where this line was going.

“There were lives on the line.” It all confused him more as he had already known of this information. He didn’t know the extent or too many details, but Dettlaff was the one to help him after Stygga.

“I remember. Geralt had been informing me of your old companions.” Ah. So, there it was. Regis knew immediately where their conversation had gone to. Dettlaff had either apologized, leading Geralt and him to the topic of love, or they had been conspiring to help Regis out in some way. Either option led to the same outcome, and he wasn’t prepared for it. Regis would never be prepared for it. And he certainly didn’t want to discuss it with Dettlaff, seeing as he would go to the extremes for love. Regis didn’t blame him for it, as he probably would too, but it didn’t help that he had a history.

“It was quite the bunch.” He had hoped his short tone had given him a clue that Regis didn’t want to talk about things, but he was disappointed.

“He had mentioned someone named Y/n.” He tried to keep his face from tightening, but he knew he failed.

“Yes… she was… important.” Dettlaff nodded as they reached the door of his cottage. He opened the door motioning Regis to enter first, but he shook his head. Regis was going to get out of the subject, and that was that.

“Important?”

“I don’t have any label for it. I don’t even know if she’s alive now, so I refrain from thinking on it.”

“Too painful for a label-less entity? It sounds like more.” Regis hummed again, turning to leave.

“And seemingly unrequited at the time. I shall be back soon.” His legs took him all the way back to the graveyard, even though he could have gotten there quicker by misting. Dettlaff wasn’t powerful enough to do so, but the stroll was shorter from the vineyard.

It was a good way to blow off steam. The feeling in the air revealed itself to have root in the very same subject. It made sense, since it started after the reunion. Y/n was among the old comrades that weren’t resent. The only ones that hadn’t appeared had seemed to be those who had passed, and while Regis hadn’t tried to think of her, her absence was noticed. And this had followed Dettlaff’s run in, and havoc he created after love had bit him in the ass. He knew Dandelion would have looked for her when Regis had suggested the reunion for Geralt.

Then she wasn’t there.

He moved on as much as he could, coming to terms with what he assumed was reality. He knew that Dettlaff wouldn’t go searching for her, nor was a powerful enough to do so if he wanted to.

 The crow that would constantly stay around the vineyard came swooping down, landing on his shoulder. His hands were fully immersed in water. His coat was left at home, the sun shining bright. It was a perfect day to try and find aquatic bacteria for his new concoction. His trousers were rolled to his knees, his boots lying close to the tide. The crow informed him that he was needed urgently. The vials containing the water samples were placed into his bag before quickly grabbing his shoes. He didn’t know how urgent it really was, but he assumed Geralt would have com himself if time wasn’t a variable. He shifted into mist, only reforming minutes later in front of the vineyard. B. Basil had greeted him, offering Geralt’s whereabouts. He hadn’t thought of unrolling his shirt or pants, rushing into the greenhouse.

It took a double take to actually conceive the form in front of him. Though she wasn’t facing him, Regis knew. A loose white shirt covered her, without the usual amor, but her sword was still strapped across her back. He knew the blade well, as it was actually a gift from him before the plan to get Ciri in Stygga. When he said it wasn’t requited, it wasn’t completely true, as there was one night. One fleeting night where Regis and Y/n had been intimate, but that was only a handful of days before the raid of the castle.

Her posture was still confident, her hands placed firmly on her hips. Of course, it was usually just an act, and he could tell by how she toed the dirt tepidly.

The scent was still the same as well. Oranges and chocolate filled his lungs, and he couldn’t get enough. He never could. Regis could drown in it without having enough. Y/n always just naturally smelled of orange, and he always tried to figure out why. How could someone have such a unique and inviting scent that could remind him everywhere he went into town? A smile would always find him upon finding his nose filling with citrus, even if the loss pained him. The chocolate was more practical as she was always snacking on it.

It was a combination of scents that he purposely avoided recreating.

And besides all of these factors, he wasn’t sure it was actually her. Geralt, standing in a way to see him, made eye contact. When it seemed Y/n noticed his shift in attention, she stiffened. Only for a fraction of a second, however. She turned fast, barely needing to see Regis before throwing herself at him. Arms wrapped around his neck, legs dangling as she wasn’t quite tall enough. His nose found the crook of her neck just as fast, inhaling until it hurt his full lungs. He still wasn’t sure it was real. Until-

“Emiel.” The tone was breathy, uncertain whether to laugh or cry. To scream his name or to whisper due to proximity.

Y/n was really the only one to call him by his first name, and it solidified it for him.

His arms slid around her waist, bringing her as close to him as possible- almost as if he was trying to absorb her.

“Y/n. It’s you.” He felt the rumble of her always large laugh against him. She wasn’t always like that, usually only truly laughing around him.

“I hope so. I wouldn’t wanna be anyone else. Not now.” As to put emphasis on what she meant, her hand slid to the back of his head, fingers weaving into his hair. It felt unnatural and perfect all at the same time when he noticed his heart beating erratically. There was so much he wanted to say- to do.

He unwrapped himself from her, but kept a gentle grasp on her arm. He noticed the disappointment in her eyes, but her smile never waned. Her eyes raked over his form, her smile growing bigger. “Relaxation looks good on you.” Regis forgot that he was wearing noting really. He was stuck somewhere between bashful and prideful. He never really showed skin, but she had always had her fingers find an uncovered patch to brush.

Geralt had left them to get a meal ready. She had showed up mid-trim of his daily herb harvesting it seemed, but he was excited to get the two comfortable and talking. They all moved and sat around the table, Y/n gorging on the small sandwiches that were present. Regis just watched with hope. He didn’t know what he was hopeful for- it seemed that she showed up from the middle of something. Regis wasn’t expecting anything. She did have a life, and he wasn’t sure why Y/n was here. Geralt had laughed at the woman, slowly eating his own food.

“The road not proving prosperous?” She raised a brow, then realized she had already downed two, and was on her third.

“It’s just fine. I never did understand how you were so bad at finding coin and still be as generous as you were.” Regis raised his own brow, resting his chin on his folded hands.

“You’re still taking jobs?” Y/n wasn’t a Witcher nor a mage, but she was filling the need for those occupations. She was brilliant with a sword, her wits and will just as powerful. Regis assumed she had passed, but sometimes he liked to think that she was alive. With a family and a home.

“Yeah. I never really… settled.” He needed to know, continuing to push.

“How come?” She gave a humorless chuckle. Disbelief crossed her face, putting the sandwich down. Her eyes flew between Geralt and him, before leaning on the table, much like he was.

“I… I was apart of the Stygga plan, even if I left early. I was the last defense, waiting in the forest to make sure that if something went wrong, I could slip in and out. Maybe take out whoever was left. I…” Y/n’s hands started to fidget with her platter and her tone went quiet. Her eyes refused to meet his again, and he could hear her swallow heavily. “I stayed for so long, hoping you would somehow…. Emiel, I was there. I sat in front of- well, you, for so long. You died.”

Regis went rigid at the news, but Geralt had already known. He was the one who needed to go back and pull her from the scene. So many questions flooded him in that moment, it was hard to distinguish them. What does that have to do with her settling? Why had she still been doing dangerous things if she saw a possible outcome? Why was it so hard for people to find her?

Why hadn’t he looked for her?

Regis knew why. It was cowardice through and through.

“Why are you here now?” He scolded himself for having it come out the way it did. He looked to Geralt, almost as if he was accusing the man of rubbing of on him.

“I invited her.” Geralt smiled at him, before adding, “she’s going to stay in the guest room.”

“I had work near Novigrad when Dandelion all but threw himself into my hunt. Geralt asked after somehow tracking me down. And our famous bard is still eager to throw himself into harms way for his friends, so here I am.” Her smile was tepid as she finally looked to Regis again. Geralt excused himself, claiming he needed to finish with his herbs.

There was only a moment of silence before Y/n walked around the table and threw her arms back around him. The moment her forehead hit the crook of his neck; he could feel sobs rocking through her form. He was quick to hug back, cheek laying on her hair.

“I didn’t know.” His hand started rubbing her back, and pulling her closer. “I didn’t know you were alive or that… you had witnessed the result of that night.

“I n-never even tried-,” her sob cutting her off. It took a moment to compose herself before continuing. “ You died with my heart in your hands.”

[elvendorkwanwan]

Hit Music 2005

No one expected Gorillaz to be so popular and people probably has forgotten Blur. Damon Albarn doesn’t seem to care though, he puts Blur aside and takes Jamie Hewlett to China for two whole weeks which he calls it “collecting folk songs”. They’ve been to Hunan, Guizhou, and Zhejiang. Not only did they travel Chinese attractions and taste all kinds of local cuisines in every streets and alleys, but they also promoted their new album while they were traveling. What a smart way to kill two birds with one stone.

Damon

Hit: Do you always wear a big sunglasses to look cool? Damon: Oh, no, it’s the light here, my eyes are sensitive to the light.(He said, taking off his glasses. Wow, what a typical handsome European, he has charming blue eyes.) Hit: What is your main purpose in coming to China? Damon: I was invited by a friend, but also was attracted by Chinese culture. I am interested in the culture and lifestyle of Chinese ethnic minorities, and their music in particular. We are so fascinated by it. On the other hand, we are promoting the new album Demon Days in here. In the past two weeks, we’ve been to Guiyang, Phoenix City, Changsha and Yiwu. But we are leaving today. Hit: That’s a shame, four more days and it’s the traditional Chinese autumn festival. You can have some delicious mooncakes on that day.(Damon seems to be interested in food.) Damon: Oh, yes. We have had some amazing food here. I found Chinese food really worthy of its reputation. I also bought a book of how to make dumplings. Hit: What’s the inspiration of making Gorillaz? Do you have any plans on touring? Damon: Each song is a story, and mostly happened on a dark night.It’s similar to the darkness that fell upon people after the 9 / 11 incident. For touring, as I have a very good impression of China, I will talk about it with my friends. We’re planning a world tour. I promise you, there will be a Chinese date. We’ll be back. (How’s the new video going? Damon: We are sampling in Africa right now, we have three videos done, now there’s one left. ) Hit: How did you and Jamie meet? Damon: We have many mutual friends, we’ve been knowing each others for 15 years.(Is it true that you guys live in the same building? Damon: Yeah, but that was a year ago, now we are living across the street.) Hit: What makes you want to form a HIP-HOP virtual band in the first place? Damon: Well, I still want to write pop music, but I don’t want to make ordinary music which is boring. And I’m interested in the idea of replacing actual people with cartoon characters. In fact, we can not be simply defined as hip hop band, because our music is very diverse, we got inspirations from everything. Gorillaz combines elements of Rock, reggae, hip-hop and lo-fi together. Hit: Would you like to talk about Oasis? They released a new album this year and it’s doing well. You guys were fighting a lot back in the old days. Damon: Well the battle between Blur and Oasis was some kinda promotion of the Britpop, isn’t it? As for our music, we better leave it to other people to judge. Hit: I also heard that you slammed the Live 8 concert, why is that? Damon: Because I think the concert lost its purpose. Assisting Africa is a formidable and complicated thing, and there are different ways to approach that. I think the reason to hold Live 8 concert is to help more people to understand Africa’s culture and its current situation. But live 8 failed to do that. For example, I used to think that I know about China, but it wasn’t until I actually came here and really got to know what people’s lives were like in here that I had a deeper feeling for China, a feeling that was different from the past. For the past two weeks, I’ve been fascinated by what’s going on here. I think Live 8 is a failure. It’s like if half the people in China were starving right now, and we organized a concert to help them, but not one Chinese was involved in the whole project, would you call that a success? Hit: Ok, let’s talk about something that’s less heavy. What other hobbies do you have besides music? Damon: Cooking, jogging, and playing with my baby daughter. I really like to cook, especially Chinese food. I had so many delicious food in China! I also bought a bunch of cooking books and I am going to try all of them when I get back. Hit: Can you make dumplings yet? Damon: We’ve got it covered. (Damon laughs, and I remind him that he needs more practice.) Oh, all I have to do is slice up the flour, chop up the vegetables and meat, then put in some mushrooms. And don’t forget about the chilli. (Damon windmills his hands while speaking, as if to prove that he can really cook. “Yeah, he loves chili, ” Jamie adds.) Hit: What’d you like to say to so many Chinese fans? Damon：谢谢(Thank you)！（He says these two words fluently in a strong British accent, somebody’s been practising obviously.）

Jamie

Hit: Can you introduce yourself first? Jamie: Introduce myself? (Jamie looks at me blankly. “Start from ‘I am —’ Ready, go!” Damon quips.) I’m Jamie (He thought for a while before blurting out. “I’m single. I’m looking for a girlfriend. ” — I made fun of him as Damon did.) I’m happy to be in China. I am the artist of the band, so I drew all of these arts. Hit: How did you come up with the idea of using cartoon characters as the band’s public image? Jamie: Because cartoon characters are so common, everyone has seen cartoons, and their characters can be more edgy. They can do a lot of things that actual people can’t in real life, they are the exaggeration of reality. And it’s easier to show artist’s intentions with cartoons. Hit: I noticed that in your paintings, characters’ eyes are specially designed. Why is that? Jamie: Well, because when you talk to someone, you look them in the eye, and through their eyes you can see what they’re thinking. Hit: Who is your favourite Gorillaz member? Jamie: I think it’s Murdoc, who’s formed the band and also is the heart of the band. Hit: When you were creating Gorillaz, did you ever think about making the band members’ appearances match the music? Jamie: Not Exactly. You know, the band members have their own personalities and backgrounds. So it’s more like… making cartoons. (Did you make their personalities more similar to the actual band members?) No, they are nothing like the people behind all this . Hit: Did anything hilarious happen during this trip? Jamie: We have a lot of funny stories, but it’s hard to explain. We spent most of the two weeks bouncing on the bus. Hit: What kind of person Damon is in your eyes? Jamie: He’s a lovely sunny boy.

Bonus

1. After Damon Albarn said his “thank you” to fans, I asked if he knew any other Chinese words, he immediately turned to Jamie, who was standing next to him, and asked, “How to say dumplings? ” And then he smiled and said, “饺子! ” which sounded way more precise than the “thank you”. 2. Damon talked a lot about the places he had visited, and he solemnly pointed to the green military rubber shoes on his feet, “Look! I bought them in PHOENIX CITY! ” Jamie, who was wearing the same shoes as Damon’s, also pointed to his feet and said, “Mine too! ” 3. Damon is apparently good at doodling, so he improvised on the magazine we brought with us… I just felt a little twitch at the corner of my mouth, I don’t know how to appreciate thta! Awkward!

for @damonalbarn​

​

[fandom-necromancer]

451. Holding everything in doesn’t help, you know.

Shoutout to the amazing anon prompting this! Your other story will be up tomorrow!

Fandom: Detroit become human | Ship: Reed900

‘Good morning, tin-can’, Detective Gavin Reed greeted him without making eye contact, as usual. Nines looked up from his work, the little jabbing program in the back of his head starting to act up again upon the conclusion that the uttered statement was [dishonest] and [human is lying]. ‘Good morning, Detective. How had your weekend been?’ ‘Fine.’ [Subject is distant]   [Doesn’t speak the whole truth] Nines nodded and got back to work. He had to go to a Cyberlife store soon and get this checked. Something had to be wrong, because with every word out of that human’s mouth he sensed lies and withheld words. A behaviour like that simply wasn’t natural. Maybe for a day or two, Nines supposed someone could handle it. But three months? Clearly some code had to be faulty.

A message popped up in his vision, informing him of a crime scene that called for their attention. ‘There had been a suspected drug related murder’, he reported dutifully to his partner. ‘We are to leave immediately.’ ‘No, I didn’t even had-‘ The detective cut himself off as Nines had turned towards him attentive to every word. This time they didn’t scream [human is dishonest]. ‘Alright, I’m coming.’ The human stood up and put on his jacket. ‘May I inform you that you haven’t had your morning coffee yet, detective?’ The man tensed and held it for several seconds, before letting out a deep sigh. ‘I know, toaster, it’s fine.’   [human is lying]

The drive to the crime scene was silent. Nines knew it was normal to discuss what they knew about the scene, but the detective wasn’t one for banter. So, he prepared one of his usual monologues: ‘The body was found today at 6:43 AM by garbage collectors in an industrial park. As I was informed there aren’t any signs of a murder on the body, but there were traces of red ice and a message left.’ ‘Oh god, will you shut u-‘ Nines looked over to his partner at the uncommon reaction, but before he could say something, the human corrected himself: ‘I’m sorry. Continue.’ Again, it was dishonest from the bone. ‘Detective, if you’d rather drive in silence and examine the scene for yourself, I can stop.’ ‘No! No, no, I’m fine, I don’t want to stand in your way. Just get on.’ [lie] ‘Okay… Well, there is a message on the wall above the body, Cyberlife font but not perfect. Maybe trying to blame androids for the murder?’ ‘We are there’, the detective interrupted and parked the car lazily at the street.

He almost fled through the opened gate in the fence and followed a beat cop already waiting for them. The woman led them through a jungle of pipes and brick-walls, maybe it was a chemical plant. Nines didn’t look it up, he was preoccupied hurrying after his partner.

He caught up to him as they arrived at the scene: True to Nines’ description there was a dead body, a middle-aged woman, leaning against a wall and a pipe. The ground was covered in tiny red crystals that turned blue where they came in touch with water puddles from yesterday’s downpour. No obvious signs of foreign interference, no blood, no needles, no reminders of handprints or rope at the throat. She looked like she was sleeping. Above her head there was near perfectly written: Pay your debts.

The detective was already on his knees, inspecting the crystals on the ground. ‘There is no pattern in the distribution’, Nines helped and saw the man flinch but say nothing, moving on to the body. Nines dipped a finger into the red dust and brought it to his mouth. The familiar results came in near immediately. ‘Red Ice.’ Gavin was already looking at the woman, crouching down once more to study face and throat, then hands and clothing. Meanwhile Nines looked up her file. ‘Her name is Susan Miller. Married, no children. No history of drug abuse, at least none documented. Works at a local news channel, no peculiarities at record there. Uploads photos of a bird regularly on social media. At least from her file there is no motive for a murder.’ He had noticed how the human had increasingly tensed while he was speaking. Nines immediately recalled what he had said, searching for a reason for this behaviour but found none. So, he continued: ‘The writing on the wall appears perfect, but there are little waves at the corners, evidence of a slight tremor or malfunction. Not enough to eliminate the writer either being human or android.’ Still, the crouched down human wasn’t answering, silently inspecting the findings in her pockets. A wallet with a bunch of cards, some money and pictures of her husband and the bird. Some keys, one for a car, one that looked like fitting a front door. Some handkerchiefs. Pepper spray. ‘The spray had been used at least once’, Nines supplied from his analysis. ‘I will try to find out whether that was here.’

He crouched down, getting samples of the ground around the dead woman, but stopped as his partner got up and walked away without a word. ‘Detective!’, Nines called out for him, but there was no reaction. He got up, recalling his recent memories. Why was the man acting so strangely? With everything he had done he had intended to help. There was a reason, androids were flooding the police. They could see things humans couldn’t. Nines would stand for it without pride or a feeling of superiority. There was also a lot, humans could do that went far over an android’s head. Especially working with detective Reed Nines experienced it nearly every day. He really liked working with the man as he was efficient and not hindered by compassionate emotions. The only thing standing between him and a successful cooperation was this behaviour the man was displaying: No more speaking than the barest minimum, every direct question answered with something he knew wasn’t what the man wanted to say. And he decided that this had to end that moment, standing next to the dead body of the poor woman.

He started running to catch up to his partner and found him sitting behind the wheel looking the other direction. Clearly waiting for him but not voluntarily. Silently, Nines entered the passenger seat, but as the man wanted to reach for the gear-knob, Nines grabbed it instead, looking at the human with determination. The detective met his eyes, flinching at the contact and immediately his left hand was at the door-handle. Nines scanned the human opposite to him and realised for the first time that this was a reaction of fear. Of course, he had never noticed it. He wouldn’t have thought the man to fear anything after seeing him in action with no regards to his own safety, only having the mission in mind.

Nines averted his eyes and let go of the knob, strangely regretting that the human was afraid of him. What had he done to frighten a man like Reed? Of course, he could be frightening. He had been designed to be. But he had always tried to be gentle and helpful. ‘I’m sorry, detective.’ ‘What?’ ‘You seem to be afraid of me.’ ‘No I’m not!’ ‘You are lying right now.’

There was silence. ‘I detected you lying to me repeatedly, always saying something you didn’t mean or trying to cover something up that slipped past your lips that you did mean. I… I asked myself what I did wrong all the time, but now I know. I am sorry to frighten you.’ ‘You don’t frighten me’, it was quietly uttered, as if ashamed. But it was true for once and Nines looked up again, studying the human that had crossed his arms over the steering wheel. ‘Then please tell me what I’m doing wrong. I can see your stress levels spike whenever you are talking to me, but you never tell me what causes that. I can ask for a transfer, if you want. Though I really enjoy working with you.’ ‘It’s nothing, I can handle it.’ ‘You are lying again. Holding everything in doesn’t help, you know.’

‘Fine, okay!’ Suddenly there was anger. Anger Nines hadn’t seen before, as if it had been chained deep inside his partner and only now set free. ‘I never asked for a partner. I was perfectly fine being alone. And then I get a phcking machine! A damn Connor 2.0! You know I would have rather learned I’m replaced by a bot than work with one! You perfect analysing dipshits, scrolling through people’s social media and finding out every little detail we thought to be well hidden. What will the world come to once our metal overlords slowly take everything? When our worth is determined by machines? Phck, I hate your kind. Always had and always will. And if you want to punch me unconscious for this too, like your damn doppelgänger did to show me my place, then fine, do it! It won’t change who I am! You would have to kill me for that!’ Nines looked at the human surprised and confused. He had never expected… What had Connor done? He accessed the precinct’s surveillance database through the android network and searched for anything that would explain what happened. As he searched, there was a groan coming from the human as he slumped down again. Finally he found a file. Gavin threatening Connor for illegally entering the evidence room. And moments later ending up on the floor unconscious. A heavy blow to a proud man’s ego. It made Nines re-evaluate his relationship to Connor and his approach to the human next to him.

‘I would never harm you, detective’, Nines said carefully. ‘I wouldn’t even think of it.’ He paused, expecting the human to intervene and shut him up. But detective Reed stayed silent. Without being able to see his face, Nines couldn’t find out whether what he was saying had an impact. ‘And I definitely don’t think humans are of any different worth than androids. I disagree of humans being superior. But so I do with androids. We are equals. I wouldn’t have taken the job if I replaced a human. I don’t know what Connor thought as he did this to you, but I don’t think it was justified. I know nothing I say will change your opinion on androids, but please look at my actions when judging me, not other’s.’ ‘Fine, asshole, I’ll judge you by your actions: You always act like you know phcking everything. As if a human can’t get to the conclusion that a pepper spray was used before! Shit, then the ordering around. New crime scene there, we are to go here… Bullshit! We are not partners! You are the perfect detective and I’m the burden you have to bring along because technically you have a partner. Don’t you tell me we are equals!’ ‘But we are? You are not a burden. You don’t speak to me at all, how should I have known what you found out? I just thought to help you by stating everything I could see. And I never intended to order you around although I see I might have phrased some sentences really weirdly. I’m sorry for that. But you have to tell me that, how else should I know?’ ‘Hmm yeah and end up drooling on the floor again? No thank you!’ ‘That’s not healthy.’ ‘Yeah, well, phck you! I only have my eight hours with you, then I can relax again.’ ‘But it doesn’t have to be like this. I can assure you you can always tell me. I promise you I’ll never harm you. We are partners, we are supposed to protect the other. And I need you. I agree, I can analyse samples and see more at a crime scene than a human. But you are far more advanced in finding a motive and thinking like a killer would. You have social skills I would never manage to develop in my active time. I need your skills and you need mine. And that’s how it is supposed to be. If you have problems with me, you can tell me.’

There was a heavy sigh. ‘You can’t tell me you need me. That’s bullshit. When did you ever needed me?’ ‘Every talk to witnesses or family members of victims, you lead. I couldn’t be compassionate if my life depended on it. I’m too analytical for it. And take this case for an example: I suppose you already have a hunch?’ ‘…Yeah.’ ‘I don’t. I know there is not enough evidence yet. But you already have an idea to follow for the next steps. That is one of your most amazing qualities.’

They still sat in the car, twenty minutes after leaving the crime scene. ‘So, how about we start over and you talk to me as if I were a human partner that in no way had a chance at overpowering you in a fight?’ The detective had risen his head over the wheel again, maybe Nines had managed to get through to him. ‘I think I could try that.’ ‘That’s good to hear, detective.’ ‘The name’s Gavin.’

[martianarctic]

Devin’s Playlist -2010s Part 1

This is an unfinished retrospective look at what I listened to during the 2010s. This decade was exceptional for me, as it was the first decade where, for almost all of it, I was not a musician myself. 

Being a musician forces you to listen to music like a musician, and being free of that, and able to listen as a listener alone, really made this a spectacular decade for me. I found dozens of incredible albums that were released during the decade, many of which received no significant recognition.

This was a very large project, and I did not finish it. I made it through Retrowave, Shoegaze, and Post punk. If anybody cares, I will finish the entire project, which will add Dreampop (the largest category), Vaporwave, and Dark Ambient.

Retrowave: Retrowave is electronic music that, at first listen, sounds like it may be from the 80s or 90s, mostly because the synths it uses to generate the music are either retro-inspired or literally retro equipment in some of the more extreme cases. It generally features original compositions, often, but not always, is instrumental. Rough vocals would impede the tightness and angularity of the music, so when vocals are used they are often pop produced and highly melodic. This genre gained significant exposure from Nicolas Winding Refn’s 2011 masterpiece, “Drive”.

Galactic Melt (2011) Com Truise

Electronic artist Com Truise rose to prominence off of this fantastic record, which rallies around the undeniable electro anthem of 2012, “Brokendate”. Starting with some found audio (chopped and screwed found audio becomes a big deal later on in Vaporwave) and then dropping in an absolutely thick beat we’re met with a song that eventually, as layers are dropped on, ends up being meditative, romantic, and melancholy. Emotions to that point, not well associated with dance music, but definitely would come to color the entire decade.

Era Extraña (2011) Neon Indian

Electronic solo bedroom pop was pretty cool at the end of the 00s being pushed hard by guys like Twin Shadow. I am not sure how I got ahold of Neon Indian but this album was, in a lot of ways, the true start of my musical decade. I had not been so excited and enthusiastic about a record since I had retired from making music. It really gives you a new perspective to not feel like you’re in competition with everything and trying to learn from everything- just as a listener, I was enthralled with this entire record.

Visitors (2012) Lazerhawk

I did not get into dark retrowave until after 2013 and thus discovered Lazerhawk and this record after the fact. Visitors is, in my opinion, the best dark retrowave album ever made, more consistent and listenable than competitors such as mega drive or carpenter brut. Also. This album absolutely sticks the landing with the street-strutting powerhouse “Arrival”.

I am the Night (2012) Perturbator

Made famous by soundtracking the indie game hit Hotline Miami (one of the best games of the decade), Perturbator carved a niche for himself with fast, brutal, high energy dark electronic music and absolutely bonkers live shows. Perturbator has a large catalog of content- I am the Night is definitely the starter kit. Starting off with a thick minor chord, a church bell, and a sample of Peter Finch’s speech from “Network” you immediately know what’s in store- dark, dystopian and undeniably French electronic dance music, complete with breathtaking beat breaks, big bass synths, and complex compositions.

Innerworld (2014) Electric Youth

I had mentioned that Drive was a major popularizer of retrowave- and one song in particular, a collaboration between another retrowave artist named College, who created the low fi, catchy bassline for the song “A Real Hero”, and the vocals and lyrics, created by an artist called Electric Youth. Their record, 2014’s “Innerworld”, is one of the best retrowave efforts, with the second track, “Runaway”, even better than the song that made them famous. The pop chorus “Maybe we could just run away for good/cuz we’re both mis understood” soaring over thick, atmospheric synth pads will have you slapping the roof of your car, as you race through the freeways of LA at 3AM.

Atlas (2016) FM-84

Speaking of roof-slapping bangers, “Running in the Night” is probably retrowave’s most popular anthem, boasting one of my absolute favorite vocal performances of the decade. A group claiming rock and roll city San Francisco as their home base (despite being both British), FM-84’s Atlas is absolutely packed with a mixture of the atmospheric instrumental Miami Vice type music suggested by the red and purple setting sun cover as well as vocal driven pop songs such as the single mentioned above.

Hardwired (2018) Mitch Murder

Mitch Murder is a retrowave institution, having made the soundtrack to the viral youtube movie Kung Fury, and also, I suspect, the original music used by twitch personality Dr. Disrespect. However, he almost entirely releases 3-5 song Eps, making it tough to pick out a standout. However that all changed in 2018 with the release of Hardwired, the most accomplished mitch murder release to date. Starting off with the Jan Hammer style “Altered State”, it stays on brand throughout but tells a very unified instrumental story of cyberpunk dystopian adventure. Vangelis-style synths bring in the closer track, “Revision Control”, one of Mitch Murder’s greatest tracks. Evolving through different moods, different scenes, we can imagine the “human” protagonist confronting his cyborg nemesis he has been tasked to execute.

Retrowave Album of the Decade:

Dark All Day (2018) Gunship

As the decade wore on, retro wave slowed down for me. I thought it might be over but- without warning, Gunship, an artist I had listened to but not been completely impressed by, released what is probably the most accomplished album in the genre. Spanning various tempos and musical themes, utilizing several guest vocalists, the scope of “Dark All Day” keeps you listening to the record again and again. This record represents an evolution in a format that was at risk of being just a fad. “Come on lost boys, lets stay alive” over a ripping saxophone lead suggests mere 80s fetishism, but there is more substance than just that. The following track, “When you Grow Up, Your Heart Dies”, takes an upbeat electro jam, and really goes for emotional impact with a series of samples of characters from pop culture saying inspirational things, my favorite being “Everything worth doing is hard” which I think is just Teddy Roosevelt. My favorite track of the record, the slow ballad “Artemis & Parzival”, begins with swooning, Vangelis-style pads and then into guest vocalist Stella Le Page’s gorgeous vocals. This track definitely belongs on anybody’s make out playlist. “Were all gonna die that’s just how it is, there’s no escaping the future, nobody gets what they want in this world, even for you and me” is one of the greatest lyrics of the decade.

 Nugaze/Shoegaze-Adjacent: Shoegaze is a genre of music that features highly layered guitar effects (often run through 10 or more effects, creating a signature “vacuum cleaner” sound with a ton of distortion and white noise) and breathy vocals. Relying heavily on the depth of character of the sound, shoegaze guitar tone and production is a major creative point and almost all of these records are self-produced. Vocal themes are usually depression-inspired and lovelorn meditations, the music sounds, to most, dull and dreary, but to some, it speaks deeply to their feelings about the past and future. Shoegaze is often mixed with other guitar genres on this list, from Post Hardcore(Nothing, Title Fight), Black Metal(Deafheaven), and Thrash Metal (Astronoid).

Road Eyes (2010) Amusement Parks on Fire

Around 2010, I was promoted at my job to a new role that would require a bunch of travel. I was not a big fan of riding on airplanes. Also around that time, my brother had moved into my apartment, then out of it, and I only had a few months left on the lease. My favorite shoegaze band of the 2000s, Amusement Parks on Fire, played a gig at 330 Ritch, a club in san Francisco. I had a fantastic time at the show, and particularly loved their new material, which made it onto a record they called Road Eyes. 2 months later I moved out of my apartment in San Francisco and never would go back to living as a single dude.

Anyways, the travelling. The opening and title track to the record came to symbolize change for me. And it also was the song I would listen to every time my plane would take off. It helped me deal with the fear that something might happen- no matter how insignificant the chance – and if it did, while that song was on, it would be okay. Indeed, this was, and I will warn you I am not qualified to treat mental illness, but this actually really made flying much easier for me and it is a ritual I continue to do to this day, whenever possible.

Pipe Dreams(2013), Sway(2014), Feels like You (2019) Whirr

San Francisco nugaze/dronegaze band Whirr, large and complex, problematic, aggressive, are behind some of my favorite music of the decade. Their three album career reflects to me upon the primary feelings of youth: euphoria, anger, and sadness.

Pipe Dreams is a blissful set of jams, meditative, energetic uptempo and with almost totally co-ed vocals. Noisy production casts a hydrocarbon haze over the songs, raw vocal melodies reach out of the fuzz and suck you in. “Junebouvier” and “Toss” capture the euphoric and  youthful energy of a summer in San Francisco: starting off with breakups May thru July, and hot hookups until September or October when people settle into relationships. Two hungry eyes emerging from straight-bangs to make eye contact with you, and hold it- the exhilaration of touching somebody new.

Sway, the band’s masterwork, starts off with a heavily muff-distorted major 7th chord suspending us until the massive drums, now a hallmark of the band’s sound, kick off the beat into the opening rocker Press. The band switches up rhythms between drums, guitars, and bass to bring rock and roll-type turnarounds and breaks that really keep you on your toes and engaged. The lead guitar is classic legato shoegaze, using delay to achieve a long, sustained scream. Compositions are key on this record- not following just simple A/B patterns there’s some thought to the structure of the songs and record. “Dry”, in particular, demonstrates some of these ideas. A/B sections, underscored with “Drown me everytime… Dry”, give way to breaks, ethereal echo guitar solos, giving a hint of the powerful ending. A 4 chord progression accented by breathtaking drum fills finaly flourishes into a screaming cymbal-laden guitar finish.

Feels like You, the bands purported final album, starts off with some quiet echo piano. The melancholy major 7 chords the band has leaned on throughout their music are laid bare as we press play on the record. Add guitar. At a little after 90 seconds the band jumps in after with a thick blanket of lonesome self-reflection and chemical depression. The bands penchant for composition remains to the end, with changes keeping you engaged as the noise soothes your heart. “Younger than You” is one of the band’s greatest tracks, starting with an almost Smashing Pumpkins/Silversun Pickups esque clean unison guitar/bass into distorted and layered noise, ending with a drum-guided, rock and roll style outro.

 Guilty of Everything (2014) Nothing

One of the things I mention in my preface to this is, for me, the 2010s were the first decade of my life that ended with me not being a musician. And it opened some doors for me, creatively, to be able to hear music and think about it purely as a listener and a person. Something others have frequently described to me, that I had never really done, was just spend an entire weekend listening to an album.

I saw Nothing on KEXP 5 years ago when Guilty of Everything was out and they were on tour. I’ve seen them twice in person since them and bought every one of their records. The weekend that I got Guilty, I was attending a close friend’s sisters wedding, and pretty much was in a hotel room drunk in overcast-as-fuck santa cruz all weekend. And you know what was being played through headphones at practically all times.

Nothing is mostly the musical project of a guy named Dominic Palermo, a punk from the Philly scene that had spent more than a year in prison for a stabbing. He isn’t much of a vocalist or guitarist, but he is a fantastic artist, writer, photographer, and visionary, and the creative force behind what is now a rotating cast of other musicians.

Guilty of Everything is definitely their best record, opening with the massive meditation Hymn to the Pillory, into the definitive single Bent Nail, a perfect marriage of hardcore punk and shoegaze elements, falling apart into the 90mph crash, into a wall, final outro chorus “If you feel like/letting go…” repeated over and over over pure drone guitars, seamlessly flowing into the romantic slow jam “Endlessly” The closing title track is one of the best closers of the decade, perfectly sticking the landing on this brilliant lyric: “My hands are up, I’m on my knees I don’t have a gun, you can search me please. I’ve given up, but you shoot me anyway, I’m guilty of everything. I’m guilty of everything”.

Hyperview (2015) Title Fight

Nothing wasn’t the only Pennsylvanian post-hardcore band to bend their sound a bit shoegaze. Title Fight also sneaks onto this list with their outstanding record Hyperview from 2015. Appealing compositions and melodies combine with harmonized vocals, even some 16 beats on the hats- things we expect from post hardcore, but slowed down and smeared out a bit into the shoegaze aesthetic. My favorite track from the record, “Hypernight”, combines some screamo hype man chorus, math rock inspired guitar and bass lines, and is just all in all one of the most unique tracks to come out of the decade. “I don’t want to see things differently, its what I am taught myself to believe”.

Grandfeathered (2016) Pinkshinyultrablast

I admit that I bounced off of Russian electro-shoegazers Pinkshinyultrablast the first time I listened to them a few years ago. There was just too much going on and I didn’t really have the inclination to jump in and grab on. Operatic female vocals, noisy djenty guitar, shimmery, clean guitar, all swirl together in what is undoubtably a great record for having a tinder date IF, and I say IF, you’re willing to run a musicological acid test on them.

Whether it was listening to a bunch more music, particularly ambient music, or just changing taste now I can’t get enough of this band. They do slam from idea to idea in a song, but it’s a controlled speed- it’s not pleasant to a lot of people, but once you get yourself situated, you’ll wonder how you ever missed this band to begin with, if you’re not one of the people reading this and thinking, naw dude, I got this shit RIGHT AWAY.

The compositions on the record are, in fact, carefully considered and composed, combining noise rock with clean ambience deftly and changing up styles repeatedly throughout each song and the record. Everybody knows we can no longer control dynamics via volume in today’s world of headphone/device listening,  ultramaximizing mastering, laptop speakers, etc. So Pinkshinyultrablast controls it with style. This record is definitely the more guitar-driven of the albums from this decade, with their release 2 years later being more electronic and vocal focused.

Slowdive (2017) Slowdive/My Bloody Valentine (2013) mbv

There are two bands that are credited with creating and or popularizing the Shoegaze movement during the late 80s and early 90s. Those bands are My Bloody Valentine, and Slowdive. Both of whom released albums during the 2010s. And frankly, both records are damn good for two bands that have been basically on hiatus for 20 years. Neither has really stood the test of time for me, although I listened to both exhaustively upon release. 

The opening tracks of both records are absolutely mesmerizing, this slow, sexy intro is clearly the part of them that became stronger with age. The manic rock energy of their more upbeat tracks however is absent or at least forced, and I think is what keeps these from being really what I’d call strong records. Nevertheless, both albums belong on any shoegazer’s playlists both for the quality of the music as well as the nod to the progenators of the genre we love so much.

Time n Place (2018) Kero Kero Bonito

KKB was already one of the biggest indie rock groups in the world when they released this their second full-length album. Making a big move sound-wise from super squeaky clean hip hop style production to sloppy shoegaze guitars and drums, they alienated a lot of fans with Time n Place, but I don’t see how. For me, coming in for Time n Place and then going back in the catalogue to Bonito Generation, I see it as a very natural progression. As the artists become more confident and mature, it’s natural they should explore some other emotions and moods.

That said I am not the usual KKB fan. Actually at their show in San Francisco in 2018 I was probably in the top 95 percentile of being an old fart. Around me, mostly twentysomethings on the first half decade, casually doing key bumps right on the show floor, something scared old gen Xers like me, still remembering their friend’s divorced dads in cigarette boats they sold for coke in the 80s, are still too paranoid to do. The crowd definitely starting pogo jumping at the chorus to “Only Acting” a grungy, poppy metaphor between acting on stage, and being young and in love.

Right after that, “Flyaway“ is the upbeat shoegazey manic anthem that really got me sucked into the band to begin with. Combining fuzzy guitars that are more reminiscent of Japanese rock bands of the 00s than shoegaze with a crystalline clear melodic vocal line from Sarah, this is the track where I grab a handful of dirt from my dying hill, and say if you don’t like this song, you don’t like the band, the record, or my musical taste.

Miserable Miracles (2018) Pinkshinyultrablast

Reinventing themselves record by record, Pinkshinyultrablast keeps on the cutting edge and doesn’t make a habit of anything. Miserable Miracles is more electronics driven, lead and pad synthesizers bringing in the music with their trademark soaring, operatic vocals. Guitars are present as well, but heavily stretched with cathedral reverb and long delay. A smoother sound than Grandfeathered, but well-poised to issue a majestic, meditative prayer such as “Find your Saint”, my favorite track. Like walking into a Germanic church on Sunday, the vocals rise to the ceiling forcing you to look up at the light breaking in through stained glass synthesizers. At about 100 seconds, all of the pieces drop in together to lift you into wherever it is you are going. “I used to talk- about it” brings the heavenly outro to bear, one of the most powerful musical moments of the decade.

Astronoid (2019) Astronoid

I am part of a few music groups on Facebook, and one of them mentioned this band, calling them “Dream Thrash”- a combination of dreampop and thrash metal. I’d say its more thrashgaze, with heavy effects/djenty guitar and the more whispery vocals than are a hallmark of the shoegaze genre, not the clear pop produced vocals that are the hallmark of dreampop.

That out of the way, this is possibly my favorite record of 2019. The opening track, “A New Color”, brims with energy and hopeful optimism and replaced Road Eyes as my airplane take off song. Right around 3 minutes in, when the plane is airborne and gaining climbing u to cruise, when we’re often breaking through the clouds, comes in possibly my favorite guitar solo of all time. On this record, Astronoid are unquestionably uptempo metal yet somehow at the same time being slow-changing enough to carry the emotional weight of shoegaze. The second track, “Dream in Lines”, is an aggressive, more metal-informed rocker, and the third is a power ballad that absolutely sealed the deal for me in terms of loving this album.

Other high points include the uptempo thrash jam “Breathe” and “Water”. Again infusing the metal, djenty mute strum guitar with soaring vocals and heavy backing harmonics, this record continues again and again to deliver head-banging jams that touch and heal a deep sadness in the soul. “Water” is a darker exploration, starting with a heavy chunky two-guitar & bass instrumental, virtuous breaks, and expansive echo and reverb. The band sounds like they are playing in the middle of an interstellar arena, fists human and alien in the sky.

The album sticks the landing with the penultimate track “Beyond the Scope”. This incredible song starts slowly, but upon reaching a turn, goes double-time as the melody and music climbs in pitch at 100 seconds in. This transition takes us into a greater urgency, with sustained, over-flying guitar notes keeping the harmony rich and complex.

Then, the beat drops out and a single guitar chord rings- “My hands are on my ears/They won’t stop ringing” smashes into your brain and your heart. Then again, the building section- “Feeble-minded/I can not decide/in my world, now I know/there’s no such thing as dying/so leave with a goodbye” and into another build and back to the chorus-

“My hands are on my ears/they won’t stop ringing”. I don’t think any lyric can better express the decade than that. If it were somehow possible for this album to end on this song, it would be at the head of this category.

Everything Starts to Be a Reminder (2019) Echodrone

As a former musician, I have a lot of friends who are musicians. I am very brutally honest about my feelings in music and that can make it awkward to have to comment on a friend’s hard work. Echodrone’s latest record made this very easy- the record is simply amazing. Echodrone’s earlier records bounced off of me a bit, but this one has just the right mixture of drone-drenched empty space, ethereal vocals, emotional anguish and euphoria, and a strong connection to the last 10 years in my mind. The tracks are named after the four seasons, starting with Winter and ending with Autumn. Interestingly, the tracks do not really stand out as being separate in my mind, much like how you cannot easily separate a season from another season in the same year.

“Winter” explodes with an epic, cymbal-laden meditation, that continues to grow and grow and expand, then finally becomes quieter, more melodic, and less drony in the second half of the 18 ½ minute song.

“Spring” features a finger-pick echo guitar interspersed with a beautiful co-ed vocal line guiding us down a pathway of different melodic and harmonic ideas. It then enters into a several-minutes long jammy contemplation that is utterly ecstatic to me- synths layered with effects-laden bass and more echo guitar into a full stop.

The best song on the record, “Summer”, begins with a vocal sample into a more or less straight-ahead rock and roll jam. This gives way to a downtempo effects section, then at right after 4 ½ minutes, gives way to a sound I can only call Olympian in hugeness. Fuzz bass, echoing guitars, and multilayered female vocals create this trance-like atmosphere that is rarefied and deeply marked with potent and everchanging imagery at the same time, like cream on top of coffee.

The sound continues to change and becomes quiet again once again with echo guitars carrying the music through. Back to a rhythmic return at 12 ¾ minutes. A synth flute melody flies over the whispered vocals, complex drum patterns- an opine to the end of life’s summer, the bitter sweetness of being old enough to not be hurt anymore by unlikely things failing to fly.

 Shoegaze Album of the Decade:

Sunbather (2013) Deafheaven

A single distorted guitar chord progression holding several notes through the chords for changing harmonics, exploding into double kick and even more guitars, into black metal screaming- this is the unmistakable beginning of Sunbather by San Francisco black metal band Deafheaven.

Due to its downtempo sections, overall distorted and layered production, and emotional scope, this album is loved not just by black metal fans but also by shoegaze fans such as myself. It is a perfect example of a successful crossover- not anticipated or forced in any way by the creators- but it just happens to work on so many different levels.

There are really only four songs on this record, the tracks in between them are much needed interludes. Something all Deafheaven songs do very well is compositioning. These tracks play out, in a way, like classical pieces, with many different sections, transitions, themes, changes, openings, closings, callbacks- it’s so incredibly dense and accomplished that you can listen to this album for weeks on end and still be surprised.

“Dream House” is the blazing opener of the record and puts on display everything we love about every song on here. To make this song the first track is insane, simply because of how over-the-top insanely powerful it is. After a brief interlude of just picked echo guitar, a single chord strum, the entire band comes back in a beat later, and this isn’t even the most emotional part of the song. That’s going to be at 7 minutes, 20 seconds in “I watched/It die!!!” screeches the vocalist as a guitar ostinado plays over the key notes that have been presented throughout the song in brutal crystal clarity. Then at 8 minutes- the vocalist and guitar break down, screaming and double picking guitar notes. It is difficult not to cry at this ending- and this is only the first song on the record.

“Sunbather” is both the title track and the album’s dark heart. Thrumming with a complex beat from the start, the other instruments are layered over this like a tangle of vines across an iron fence. Skillful use of double kick and drum fills keeps the band on target as we get to the breaks and turnarounds. The cymbals and guitars swirl creating complex patterns. Listening to this song from far away with extremely poor speakers would sound like static- similar to how Jupiter looks like a pale gold smear- turn up the volume a little, get a little closer, and you see the rich, threatening complexity of the swirling clouds of music and emotion. The song ends with a slow section about ¾ of the way through the 10 minute piece. An unforgettable echo guitar line plays sparsely over drums- invoking a Cure-like gothic sensibility. Then the band comes back in, playing the same melody and expanding upon it, a lighting bolt magnified to a thousand forks and twists going in all directions. It is the melodies at the end of Sunbather that were stuck in my head, unforgettable, after listening to this record. Unlike Dream House, this song ends on a down note, a question- the rest of the album is to give an answer, and incredibly, you will not be disappointed.

“Vertigo” is the longest song on the record at 14 ½ minutes, a blazing, minor key rocker that is meant to emotionally drag us down as far as we can go after Sunbather. The ending of the song invokes the Beatles “She’s So Heavy” before heading into “Windows” an ambient and spoken word piece featuring a drug deal gone bad- unquestionably a node to The Tenderloin, one of the more drug-laden districts in San Francisco and likely location of the band’s rehearsal studios.

Into “The Pecan Tree”, a song that has an seemingly impossible task: To somehow stick the landing of an extremely powerful and emotional record. We are looking for something coming into this track, but we are not totally sure what it is. We need something, but we can only follow the lights. The song opens up with insane double-kick guitar madness, 2 step rhythm, and then at 1:20 we see a glimpse through the storm, a hole of blue, that we can make it to, if we keep on going. Keep on going. Keep on walking. Smashing, swirling guitars and screams return, our view obstructed. Everything seems to be going at maximum at the end of this first section of the song.

At just after 3 minutes, the sonic assault finally begins to slow down, a march tempo into double kick continuous cymbals, back to march tempo, then, at 4 minutes 19 seconds, only picked echo guitar heralds us into the second section. The star of this section is a piano ostinato combined with the echo guitar, with a second guitar playing playful melodies over it. This is the starry night we can now see that the storm has cleared- this is the most optimistic and life affirming music on the record. A found audio recording of a detuned radio signals the ending of this section.

Eventually, this music fades just before four metal beats brings us to the conclusion- an octave-fingering guitar line and screeching vocal that is in my view one of the most awesome emotional turnarounds that I have ever experienced musically. The remaining outro sums up the entire record- life is big, difficult, unknowable, chaotic. Great albums stick the landing- and this ending does so, with incredible energy, on a record that did not even need it. Sunbather. One of the greatest rock records of all time and one of the very few of those albums to come out now, just about half a century after the 60s.

Post Punk Revivalists: The king of indie rock genres in the 00s, post punk was largely set down at the end of the decade with the major acts of the decade releasing milquetoast or downright laughable fare (are we human, or are we dancer?). However, post punk exploded back onto the scene in 2012 with The Money Store by Death Grips. Some returning groups from the 00s did end up releasing fantastic records, Roma 79 and Daughters being my favorites.

Cardinal Star (2014) Roma 79

I discovered north San Francisco bay area band Roma 79 through their single from the 00s, “Gold”, a sort of heavy, post-punk rocker with a few-thousand views on Youtube. I was very surprised when they reunited and recorded this followup album, which was one of my favorite records of 2014. Featuring a good amount of synth and dreampoppy guitar lines, the main standouts are the vocals and the brilliant drumming, which is a hallmark of great post-punk records of the 00s such as Fever to Tell or Turn On the Bright Lights. The strongest single on the record, “Seventeen”, features a complex drum lines, interlaced with vocals and synths. The song slowly builds up in emotional intensity and drops in layers of vaguely Phil Collins-esque drums and backing vocals, blossoming into a powerful meditative love song. “I’ll wait for it with you.” The final song on the record, is almost an answer to this track, closing the record on a strong point.

You Won’t Get What You Want (2018) Daughters

Daughters is another post-punk band that returned to release a followup nearly 10 years later with 2018’s “You Won’t Get What You Want”. Like all great post punk records, there are a number of characters in this room, and they all can be heard, each having their moments in the spotlight and their moments in the shadows.

One such character is the drums. A crushing combination of live and multitracking effects create a rhythm that provides both the constant heartbeat required by driving rock and roll based music, but also the texture, the complexity, that we seek out in the genre. Lots of tom toms used to keep the beat as opposed to cymbals, practically no hat. Invoking Killing Joke, except when they don’t want to right away, but bring it in later.

Another character is the vocals. Spoken word/sing song type delivery, where the mood and the words and more important than the melody. Lyrics invoke isolation, depression, contraction, abandonment, decline. It would almost be enough with just that, these drums and vocals- but this will also be added by another character, the music. The music seems to be generated mostly by guitar and bass, but there are clearly some synthesizer elements as well, used sparingly and to great effect. I can’t really describe the guitar tone, I would say, it shimmers, but not in an enlightening way. It’s like flashes in the dark, disorienting more than illuminating. The sound is like wood coming off a circular saw. It’s definitely this guitar sound that draws people into this record. All elements are moody, dark, aggressive, but it’s the guitar that really lays down flashes over the blackness.

“Satan in the Wait”, one of the best single tracks on the record, features an off-balance drum beat, carried by toms, and an air-raid siren like guitar sound. A throbbing, distorted bassline in time with the kick drum. At 1:30 in we are given a guitar riff that is beautiful and invoking of a banjo, lending a sensation of urban, southern gothic emotions. Horror film soundtracks come to mind, a combination of unsettling ambience and clear, unforgettable melodies. “Their Bodies are open” the chorus goes, making me think of world-ending events, a transformational death as seen in Arthur C. Clarkes Childhood’s End.

Another of my favorite tracks, “Daughter”, begins with a “bela legosi is dead” kick and snare rim drum beat, possibly electronic, along with a shimmery, surf-rock toned guitar riff. As the song proceeds, more elements are dropped in, and the drums are of particular note here, at 1:23 or so, they drop into a complex beat involving toms, cymbals, and snare. At 2:05 they drop in a clear guitar riff on top of raw noise, building to a climax with the vocal “There’s a war!” At this point, the noise drops out, just a clear guitar riff reminiscent of “Satan in the Wait”, drums coming in at 3:15 or so are particularly impactful.

The final track, “Guest House”, opens on a nearly unbearable sonic assault, the lyrics invoking somebody trapped outside of a bomb shelter during an apocalypse. Once again the gap between unbearable noise and beautiful melody is bridged, as the final dissonant chords give way to deep, harmonic, peaceful orchestra swells.

Post Punk Album of the Decade:

The Money Store (2012) Death Grips

The first time somebody played “Get Got” for me, it was during a really chillwave phase in my music taste and I was completely lost, and didn’t really understand what people saw in Death Grips. I was intrigued enough though, and circled back on some tracks from Exmilitary, their prior record. The more laid back tone and empty space present in tracks such as “Culture Shock” kept me interested enough to give The Money Store another shot a year or so later.

As my interest in chillwave started to fade, and I sought more emotional substance to my music, I returned to the Money Store, and was hooked. Each track is a relentless blast of aggressive drum beats, synthesizer driven melodies, and of course the unmistakable rap vocals of MC Ride.

A strong comparison for me, is between this record, and Joy Division’s second and final record, “Closer”. Relentless beats, but never getting boring, always inventing new rhythms to cast a texture over the musical landscape. Short, fast songs, transitioning from one beat and tempo to the other, never giving you a chance to catch your breath.

The music is highly influenced by hip hop, appearing to be a chopped and cut style, with synthesizers combined with production on the vocals, adding vocals, filter sweeps, reverses, etc- so much energy and craft went into creating what is on its surface very simple music- drums, vocals, and production. Standout track “Hustle Bones” does a fantastic job of expressing what is so great about every song on this record. Everything barely makes sense, but then it all comes together in a singular moment that anybody can nod their head to.

MC Ride’s best is on display in the classic hit, “I’ve Seen Footage”. In his relentless, attacking rap style, he tells us the story of watching gore or wtf videos from reddit or 4chan (or Stile Project if you’re really old like me)-  describing what he’s seen, and then underscoring that with the chorus, “I stay noided”- the character Ride creates is deeply anxious and paranoid, while at the same time being insatiable in the quest for knowing more, something I believe is nearly universal to the experience of the internet-informed human, a phenomenon that would later in the decade lead to diseases thought dead brought back by anti-vax movements, and the election of conspiracy theorist and popularizer Donald Trump as president of the united states.

And that’s the formula to each track on Money Store- working around something more or less literal, Ride’s poetry brings us into the dark state the world was only beginning to enter at the start of the decade.

Closing track “Hacker” opens with a recording of Ride, yelling, presumably at a concert “No ins and outs!!! You come out, your shit is GONE”, then into a 4-on the floor dance beat to end the record on an absolute banger. The music, carried by the beat and Ride’s systematic delivery, is left to its own devices, with glitchy, cut-off synth arpeggios, everything getting out of the way of the beat. “Having conversations with your car alarm”, “you speak with us in certain circles, you will be dethroned or detained”, and “Gaga can’t handle this shit” are some of the lyrical gems that Ride has saved for last here, closing out a post punk record that stands alongside Closer or Turn on the Bright Lights as one of the best of all time.

[evolutionsvoid]

If you ever get a chance to visit a Hiveland ecosystem (and also gather the courage to walk those hollow mountains), your first impression of it may vary depending on your location and timing. For some, their first glimpses of the Hivelands may show a barren wasteland of sparse vegetation and shattered peaks. Others may find a land of abundance, with roaming herds and slithering vegetation coating the mountainside. Even then, if the same folk go back to the same location months later, they may find a completely different scene! This is because the Hivelands is a very chaotic place, where mountains grow and fall within weeks, and the earth itself hardens or crumbles with each passing day. In such a land, permanence is impossible, as one day the ground beneath your roots may give way or the spire high above your head may come tumbling down. This leads to a very nomadic ecosystem, where even the plants will move as time rolls by! The weather and the seasons may decide where the flora and fauna go, but the biggest driving force is the Mountain Makers. These massive colonies drift throughout the region, building new structures and abandoning them when wells run dry. Each ecosystem has many colonies residing within the earth, and their travels and disputes decide the fate of the entire ecosystem. While vegetation is available in the Hivelands, the most abundant food source to be found are the tiny Melders, the builder caste of the Mountain Makers. These little critters are responsible for building the great spires and structures, which are meant to house the other members of the colony. To even fathom how many Melders are in one colony is impossible, but it is enough to satiate the appetite of many insectivores! Many different creatures feed on the Melders, so they must follow the colony's movements to stay close to their food source. For those who feed on these beasts, they must follow as well! Even plants and fungi tag along, as the waste products from the colony provide excellent nutrients. So if you want to know where the Mountain Makers reside, just look at the land around you. Or at least look for the Naotul. The Naotul are large insectivores that are found exclusively in the Hivelands. There is no place else they could survive, as they feed entirely on the many insects that dwell within the porous earth. They slowly plod along on six stalk-like legs, using a face full of sticky tendrils to probe every hole and burrow for tasty bugs. To aid in their search is a pair of tentacles that possess a clawed manus. These appendages are flexible and have a surprisingly strong grip. These limbs are used to pull apart small mounds and spires so that they can get their tendrils inside. Practically every appendage of the Naotul is packed with sensors, so that they may feel the vibrations of the insects down below and smell the pheromones they leave behind. Just like every other creature in the Hivelands, they are a nomadic species, following the great colonies as they flow like the tides. Though vibrations and smell are their primary senses, the Naotul have stalked eyes that they use to survey the world above. They are capable of independent movement, and they often dart around erratically as they scan for threats. They are truly an odd beast to behold. Despite this, they are quite a common creature to find in the Hivelands. If you are in the right location, you can often see herds of these shelled beasts grazing on the hidden Melders down below. 

While the Naotul prey upon the Melders and other insects in the earth, they must be wary of those who would feed on them. In the Hivelands, though, it is not so much about outrunning predators or fending them off, but never encountering them in the first place. Many species use ambush to take down prey, preferring to sit and wait for a meal to walk by. Active predators do exist, but they are quite rare. I believe this is because the Hivelands are too unstable for any beast to go running about wildly. If you step in the wrong spot, then you may punch through a sinkhole and take quite the nasty fall! I imagine wolves would stop chasing prey if the earth could just randomly swallow them! But in any case, many predators prefer to hide in the many holes and burrows and wait for prey to get close. For Naotul, it is important for them to use their senses to detect these hidden attackers and steer clear. Their tendrils search for odors and vibrations, anything that may suggest an ambush. Their legs also play an important part in this! If you ever watch a Naotul walk across the landscape, you will notice that their slow pace is due to the cautious placement of their feet. Their front most pair will always stretch out in front of them and test the ground, while the rest clamp down and wait. They are trying to detect any empty pockets or unstable surfaces before they take a step. They need to know that the ground will hold their weight, and that they won't punch through the rock. This is especially important if one wants to avoid Pitfall Moles, as they love to make these hidden sinkholes! These little trap-makers can prey on Naotul, or anything that falls into their pit. Acid Slimes also feed on Naotul, but they often don't actually kill them. If you have read my entry on Acid Slimes, you know they are often referred to as "Leg-Eaters." Their caustic limbs can sear through flesh, and they often grab legs of passing prey. When they latch onto a Naotul, they can quickly burn through one of their boneless legs. The Naotul, however, has five more limbs and regenerative flesh. In time, they can simply grow the stolen foot back. So Acid Slimes will often just steal a leg and dart back into their holes, and Naotul won't really be too bothered from the attack. If the time comes to defend themselves, they have their shells to protect them and their clawed tentacles. With a nasty crack, they can whip those limbs like a cat'o'nines and leave some deep cuts. They prefer to stand their ground, as running often means falling through the ground. Some may imagine that the Naotul are sought after for their vibrant shells and soft flesh, which is quite right. Their colorful backs make for great art pieces and beautiful armor, while their tender, boneless meat is considered a delicacy in some regions. The problem (or blessing for the Naotuls) is that they reside in the Hivelands, and that isn't the safest place to hunt. Not many want to take the risk to bring down one of these beasts, especially since it means hauling the heavy carcass back the way you came! I can't imagine how many hunters didn't realize that their spoils made them a lot heavier for their journey back. Thin shells and brittle earth may have held up for them before, but a laden pack can quickly change that! Believe me, I would know! My rock samples kind of wound up going back into the earth that I collected them from! Along with my tent, bed roll and well pretty much everything else. I did happen to learn that day that I have really good grip strength when it comes to clinging for dear life! Chlora Myron Dryad Natural Historian ------------------------------------------------------------- The Hivelands require fauna, so here is some more! Started as a nautilus and then I started adding stuff. Kind turned out a weird fusion of a bunch of different things.   Also this turned out to be another entry to help further explain Hivelands and how they work. Go figure!

[hysteriamodes]

After watching “Gone Girl”.

So, uh, I have an unpopular opinion. I’m no expert on criminal investigations, I listen to a bunch of true crime podcasts, one that has a co-host, a retired detective, Paul Holes. I’m also a survivor of CSA, so I know how it goes down once you file a case to police and talked to a detective. 

I can’t really say I like this movie completely -- don’t get me wrong, it’s a good movie, but... This is not how it works, lol.

It’s hard to really take a story seriously, knowing in real life that a criminal investigation into a disappearance would involve:

- Not just interviewing the spouse/significant other, interviewing those who have been previously romantically involved with someone. - Someone would have talked to Desi - Someone would have also looked into the stalking claims against Desi and if he was supposedly doing it electronically, there would have been a paper trail. Restraining orders are really hard to get. - If you buy a car and have to drive it, you need legitimate identification, have the title singed over, and register the car in your name, so the “getaway car” just seems so unfeasible to me. You can’t drive without plates, you’d get pulled over and sellers will take the plates from you. - Also, if you look on Craig’s List, it’s on your internet history. - They also would have had search warrants for electronic devices, including computers, and would have gone through that internet history. - You can pay cash for short-term rentals or hotels, but they still require ID. - Burner phones can be traced - “No body, no crime” -- the case built against Nick is completely circumstantial. Any rational prosecutor would have tossed it out and demanded more evidence, especially if no one’s double-checking for more suspects. The amount of blood they found at the crime scene is indicative of serious injury. Blunt-force injury like that as Amy claimed what happened would leave visible bruises, even for weeks, and would also have fractures. This lady rolls up (literally) to her husband  just covered in blood and has no sign of that other than sexual intercourse. -  CSI would have probed the convenient box cutter under the pillow, while she was supposedly tied up. I mean, seriously, what the hell? - Any investigator would be dubious of Amy’s responses during that interview. According to her, she was kidnapped and held for weeks, supposedly injured, and is so unusually cool.  - In the same vein, you would have a victim’s advocate to check in on you and they too would fin that unusual.  - They would bother to check Nick’s alibis, whereabouts, and where he was, so therefore, the credit card debt would look extremely dubious. Transaction IDs wouldn’t line up if Nick was out of the house, doing his thing, and Amy is buying stuff with his credit cards while he’s at work. Just saying. - Any smart investigator would have looked at the security footage of Desi and Amy calmly strolling up through the lake house, not of her being dragged in or at least sedated. Anyone sharp enough would have noticed that.  - Desi’s phone would also have been traceable, so they would find out where he went, the casino, and there would have been security footage of Amy and Desi meeting. - Who’s to say that the people that robbed Amy didn’t notice. That woman saw through her shitty disguise and said nothing.  There was a reward posted for finding Amy; that woman also could have called into the tip line and report her stay at this hotel or whatever. - The “clues”. A sensible person would have found them oh, so, convenient.  - The “best friend” would have been interviewed, they would also disclose how long their friendship has been. - The hormone that comes up during pregnancy, that’s been diluted in water, wouldn’t be so potent enough to test... I’m still wondering what Amy’s motives were, she didn’t show Nick. She only showed her “friend” and it’s still not clear to me if the investigators checked into this. 

I guess because I’m on the aro-ace spectrum, I probably don’t appreciate what this movie says about relationships and their roles and perceptions, but my thoughts were that Amy is clearly a sociopath, she has a troubled history, and that would have came up during investigations. Not to mention, Amy is just too Perfect, to the point she supposedly outwits the FBI. These are the same folks that work in more notorious disappearances, murders, and profiling outside of a self-absorbed couple. It just reminds me that law enforcement doesn’t take women criminals a seriously compared to men. Women are just as capable of absolute sociopathy as men, though there aren’t as many sociopathic women. Women that commit murder, schemes, and behave like this operate on a completely level compared to men.

The bottom line is, women that are criminals are underestimated and that’s what I saw in this movie. Sure, Nick is an absolute asshole, but he at least was knocked down a peg to see his own faults, even going as far as saying he won’t end the marriage for the sake of his unborn child (and... don’t get me started how Amy just conveniently came up with Nick’s sperm sample, after she said to him she didn’t want kids) upon discovering he’s going to be a father.

Amy could have ended this marriage in a divorce and bled him dry of his money. She could have ceased that bar, sold it, even take his sister to court because she was a co-owner, too. And given the “Amazing Amy” books, Nick still would have been publicly humiliated and even more humiliation would have came to him. A teacher, a well-known writer, having an affair with his students? I mean, come on. His friends would dump his ass, too.

Instead, Amy over-reacts, concocts this supposed disappearance and fabricated murder, in the 21st century, where even in the mid 2010s, you are completely traceable. Amy could have disposed of evidence all she wants, but the fact remains, people are nosy as fuck and would have noticed any of this shit. Amy, realistically, wouldn’t get away with this forever; she’d be sent to prison for life.  

Amy isn’t like Thomason or Dani, she is a selfish, manipulative, and petty person. Thomason and Dani were true victims of circumstance and were so horribly traumatized, so caught up in hysteria and apathy subjected to them by men. Amy isn’t a victim; she had every chance to walk out of this, take ownership. If I was around a guy like Nick? I would have left him a long time ago. And I know that this whole movie is based on perception, but someone who’s so clearly narcissistic and so devoid of personality that she molds herself into the ideal “cool girl” would wise up and find another way, but no.

Yes, there is an argument that “women are crazy here”, but I just... I can’t. 

I found myself more frustrated with this movie, so riddled with continuity errors and that it’s so unrealistic, with a narrator that may or may not be lying to the audience, who is also Completely Prefect and Untouchable that she’s practically a Mary Sue. 

I’m also mad because there is a perception that women can make fake rape allegations and are already portrayed as conniving and scheming, and I feel like this movie just completely fed into these stereotypes. I will concede that it was likely doing that on purpose, but still, it’s not helping!  Don’t get me wrong, it’s a good movie, everyone was really cool in it, and I’m sure the book is very different, but holy shit, this is like a bad episode of Law & Order: SVU.

[unfortunate-stranger-losers]

All Those Things They Couldn’t Say - A Runaway Baudelaires AU

{ao3} {tumblr} {masterlist}

Chapter Ten - The Baudelaires tour the Reptile Room

Eventually, Monty called for them, and the children made it back downstairs and found their way to the kitchen. They were surprised, upon entering, to see that Monty had indeed made a cake for them. Gustav and him sat at the table, and handed each child a piece before letting them choose their seat. 

“Sunny doesn’t like soft foods, I’m sorry.” Violet said as they sat. 

“That’s unusual for an infant,” Monty said, “But not for many snakes. Perhaps she would like a raw carrot?” 

“Ooh-ee.” Sunny said, as he pulled a carrot from a bowl and passed it to her. “That would be lovely.” 

“Thank you, you didn’t have to do this.” Violet inspected the cake. Perhaps he had poisoned it? No, Gustav was eating, too, and he’d let them select their own pieces… 

“It’s really no trouble.” Monty smiled. He paused, and then said, “Your parents… told you about me?” 

Violet hesitated. “Not a lot. We don’t know much.” 

“But they designated you our first safehouse should we be separated.” Klaus explained. 

“Well,” Monty grinned. “That is an honor.” 

Gustav cleared his throat. He looked a bit more skeptical than Monty. “You said you were Beatrice and Bertrand’s children?” 

The way he emphasized their father’s name confused Klaus a moment, trying to figure out why that was important. Violet quickly said, “Yes. They got married after running away. We… we can name facts about them, if you-” 

“No, no, we believe you.” Monty said. “Like I said, you look just like your parents.” 

“You knew them well?” Klaus asked. 

Monty nodded. “We volunteered together.” 

They tried to hold back sighs. “That’s nice.” Violet finally said. “We hate to impose, but… we just need somewhere to stay until our parents escape.” 

“What exactly happened?” Gustav asked, leaning forwards. “You said that…” 

“That Count Olaf captured them?” Violet stared very hard down at her food. “Yeah. He did. We… he…” 

“He forged a telegram from one of our contacts.” Klaus decided that was the best way to put it. “And killed him. The telegram told us to come to the city and meet him, but it was a trap. They… they got our parents, we only got out because of Violet.” 

“If you hadn’t run for Mother and Father,” Violet said quietly, “I would’ve been too frozen to think of anything, and we’d still be in his horrible clutches.” 

“If I hadn’t run for Mother and Father, I wouldn’t have gotten this bruise.” 

“But we would’ve been worse off.” Violet shook, remembering the Count’s hands running through her hair. “They put Sunny in a birdcage. When we escaped, we broke into a house that had a library, so we could use a dictionary to break the lock.” 

“How did you do that?” Gustav asked, confused. 

“We hit it until it fell off.” Klaus said. 

“Oh.” 

“A… a woman found us.” Violet started to fiddle with the edge of her shirt. “But she called the police. We got them to at least suspect Olaf of trying to hurt us, but we had to run. We… we came here. Sorry-” 

“Don’t be sorry, children.” Monty leaned over and put a hand over Klaus, who was seated nearest to him. “You are in trouble, and you came to us, and we will protect you. Gustav, you said you administered medical treatment to their wounds?” 

“As best I could.” Gustav considered. “I doubt a hospital would be wise. I assume you don’t legally exist?”

The kids shook their heads. “Bit hard to fill out a birth certificate on the run.” Klaus said. 

“We could contact… some associates of ours.” 

“Please don’t.” Violet said. 

“Gustav,” Monty said carefully, “You know Beatrice and Bertrand… didn’t part on good terms with our associates. Let’s let the children stay awhile and figure out what to do.” 

“Only if that’s okay.” Violet said cautiously. 

“Of course.” Monty smiled. “You’re always welcome in my home. Now… do you children want to see my collection?” 

“Raccolta?” Sunny asked, which meant, “What collection?” 

“Why, my reptiles!” Monty stood up, holding out his hands to help the children to their feet. “I’m a herpetologist, after all! What kind of a herpetologist would I be if I didn’t have reptiles?” 

“Is that the… reptile room?” Violet asked. 

“It’s my Reptile Room, Violet!” Monty said. “And it’s filled with all sorts of wonderful creatures that Gustav and I are studying! Would you like to see?” 

“Is it safe?” 

Monty smiled. “It’s perfectly safe. I promise, so long as you keep a level head, no harm will come to you in the Reptile Room.” 

Klaus, who had read a little about reptiles but never had the opportunity to study them, looked to Violet hopefully. “Vi, can we?” 

She hesitated, and then nodded. “Sure. Why not?” 

Klaus grinned and picked up Sunny, shouldering her as Violet carefully followed Monty, glancing back to see Gustav coming after them, watching them just as carefully. 

Monty led them to the door underneath the stairs, and he showed them his top-of-the-line security system- a bunch of useless levers and gears, disguising the simple doorknob. 

“Brilliant.” Klaus said. 

“Ooh.” Sunny said. 

Monty smiled and swung open the door, and Klaus immediately gasped and ran inside, a cheering Sunny in his arms. 

The room, walled with glass, was filled to the brim with cages and containers, all with brightly-colored reptiles. Snakes and turtles, lizards and newts, everything the children could think of. Klaus immediately ran to a glass container, showing Sunny the two-headed cobra inside, while Violet found herself wandering to a large cage, holding three winged lizards, flapping between perches and chirping. She knelt by the complex lock, eyes widening. 

“This is impressive.” she said, reaching for her hair ribbon. 

“It has to be.” said Gustav, smiling. “The lizards keep escaping.” 

“In fact, the only one we haven’t figured out how to lock up is our Incredibly Deadly Viper.” Monty said, smiling. He glanced towards a cage that was, indeed, swinging open, and said, “Speaking of which, where’ve- oh! There it is!” 

Sunny giggled as the coal-black snake slithered over a hanging pole, made to look like a tree branch. It slid down, hissing in Sunny’s face; Klaus hesitated slightly, wondering if he should move back, but Sunny laughed and reached forwards, grabbing its head. 

“Dr Montgomery,” Klaus said, eyeing the snake. 

“Oh, please call me Monty.” 

“Dr Montgomery,” Klaus continued, “Are there any snakes in here that are dangerous?” 

“Why, of course.” Monty said. “You can’t study reptiles without coming across dangerous ones. Why, I have a cabinet filled with venom samples from every snake known to herpetology! But all the poisonous reptiles are kept in cages with sturdy locks. I promise you, children, they cannot harm you in here.” 

Violet inspected another lock; these did seem to be very well-made, hard to remove. She looked up at the snake inside, and then she smiled a little. “This place is amazing.” she said. A crocodile, contained by the wall, let out a cry, sounding very much like it was saying Woe is me. Violet smiled, and then imitated its call. “Woe is me!” 

Gustav, surprised, came over to her. “You have a very good impression of the broken-hearted crocodile.” 

“I can imitate lots of different voices and sounds.” Violet shrugged. “But Klaus is better at forging-”

“Monty,” Klaus started, looking over at a far wall, “Are those books?” 

“Of course! That’s my library! You may read whatever you wish from it.” 

“We can read…” Klaus was enchanted. 

“And you won’t call the police?” Violet asked, just to be sure. “They’ll just arrest our parents when they come for us.” 

“No. Just us. And if you’re uncomfortable and want to leave, I’ll ensure you get to the next safehouse as soon as you can- I’m sure you have others?” the children nodded. “But please, make yourselves at home.” 

Violet paused, and her and Klaus shared a look. They weren’t sure what they were to be expected to do in return. Every now and again they’d stayed in the guest room of some house or another, and their parents had done some chores or repaired a furnace or something. 

“We could help around.” Violet said after a while. “I’m very good at repairing things.” 

“I can clean the library, and I can read up on snakes to help with the care.” Klaus volunteered. “I’m sure we can think of something for Sunny to do…” 

Monty smiled warmly, and walked over to Violet, putting a hand on her shoulder. “That won’t be necessary. That won’t be necessary at all. You’re guests in our home, and we will take care of you as best we can.” 

Violet stared up at him, and felt some kind of peace wash over her. 

He’d take care of them. 

They all slept in the same room- for understandable reasons, they really didn’t want to be separated at the moment. 

As Violet crawled into bed, Sunny curled up and snoring on the pillow beside her, she said, “I think we can trust him. For now.” 

“Yeah.” Klaus nodded fervently. “So long as he doesn’t call the police or VFD on us. What do you think of Gustav?” 

“Bit more suspicious.” Violet considered. “But he seems to listen to Monty. Be a bit careful around him, but I don’t think we have to worry too much.” 

“Are you sure?” 

Violet sild under the blankets, tucking them over Sunny, too. “I’m never sure. But- close as I can be, yes.” 

“And do you think our parents can find us here?” 

Violet shut her eyes. “They will.” 

They have to.

[aiw0lf]

Confessing Wild

Nick Wilde still did not like being in a courtroom. Even now, a year after the academy, and not really being in the courtroom he found himself fidgety. He was currently sitting in the holding room where they put witnesses awaiting their turn on the stand when the prosecution or defense doesn't want them listening to other witness testimony. The long narrow room had two rows of chairs both leaned with their backs to the opposite walls. Maybe his discomfort stemmed from his lack of entertainment. His normally ever-present, ever cheerful partner was in the courtroom. He wasn't worried for her, no one the prosecution had called to be witnesses today had any reason to be worried. Except maybe himself and the vixen on the other end of the room. Zootopia had always been a clinical place for a fox.

The bailiff standing near the door to the main courtroom was a warning to all in the cramped holding space. They most definitely could not talk about what happened to bring them all together. Waiting who knows how long until they had the opportunity to tell the judge and jury what they uncovered six months ago. Leading to quite possibly the biggest scandal in Zootopia since the Bellweather incident.

Nick leaned back in his chair with a yawn. Crossing his arms over his head, closing his eyes and stretching out his legs to cross them at the ankle. There were 3 other mammals in the room with him. All sat on the opposite wall facing the door. Their means of escape.

Two chairs to his left sat a young lamb reading a romantic mystery novel. She was turned away from him and her posture of one leg crossed over the other and shoulders leaned in was an effort to make her already small frame look smaller. She had pushed herself as far away from him and the others as possible. Nick didn't know if it was due to the subject of her book. When they first were escorted into the room the ewe bumped into the door dropping all of her belonging on the ground. Nick, Judy, and the vixen tried to gather everything up and hand it to the frantic female, and Nick so happened to be the one to grab the book from under a chair. The threatening look from the vixen had him swallow the jokes he was going to make. Which would have been his entertainment now with his partner was in the other room.

Directly in front of Nick was his boss. Chief Bogo made no effort to make himself smaller despite the cramped room. The Cape Buffalo was busy playing a game on his phone while intermittently taking calls from the Lieutenant he left in charge of Zootopia Police Department's Precinct 1 for the day and Benjamin Clawhuser, Precinct 1's dispatcher and front desk cheetah. The Lieutenant and Dispatch were not getting along from what Nick could hear in the half conversations he was privy to.

Two seats from Bogo's right sat someone Nick had known longer than anyone in this city save for his own mother. The red vixen sat with her legs in the same position as his own but her arms were holding her phone which she had been typing on most of the time they had been in this room, her emerald eyes focused on the screen in front of her.

If both foxes were walking down the street together most animals who passed them would only see two red foxes and not think anymore, unless they were pray then 9 times out of 10 they would cross the street away from the shifty preditors. They would not see that both Nick and this female had the same piercing green eyes. They would also not see the minute differences between them either. Nick, like most males of any given species, has a brighter coat then the vixen's. His held more orange compared to her strawberry-like coloring. His ears and tail are tipped with black, hers white. In fact, the vixen's fur heald more white than the average red fox but Nick always assumed that was due to her mother being an arctic fox.

The exasperated sigh caused Nick to open his eyes and look the vixen's way.

"That frustrating hu?" He said trying to muffle a chuckle.

"I sware public education is turning out more helpless freshmen every year," she said closing her eyes and leaning her head back against the wall. Her phone left in one hand down on her lap.

"You could always stop teaching." Said the Buffalo. As he turned his phone to the side. His tongue was sticking out of his muzzle and a look of excited concentration told Nick his boss was playing the racing game that almost every officer in the station had downloaded. He saw the same look on his best buddy's faces during morning coffee break more times then he could count. Granted the Buffalo could not wag his tail like the timber wolf could.

Ignoring Bogo completely the female fox made eye contact with Nick and illiterate, "I left my students with a simple take-home assignment since I could not find a Student-Teacher to cover my class, and I have an email box full of the dumbest questions. Does no one do their summer reading assignments anymore?"

Nick busted out laughing, unable to contain himself of his amusement at the ridiculous question. He knew the vixen was 100% serious in her annoyance. At least the Lamb at the other side of the room looked interested in the conversation.

"Oh, Professor I can attest as a former student of yours the answer is no" the sheep bayed.

But before they could all continue to mock the vixen the door opened and hopping in was the light of Nick Wilde's life.

NO Wilde. Partner, friend. That's it, put back on the hustle.

The internal monologue he had to repeat several times a day kicked in before Judy Hopps saw him. He calmed his face to show a half-smile just in time for the first bunny cop's violet eyes to look his way with a warm smile, she turned away from Nick and her smile faded to show more sympathy to the vixen.

"They're calling you next Amie." Judy said her hands bunched up in front of her and ears down.

The vixen stood and smoothed her navy pencil skirt before tugging the matching blazer in place, ears erect on the top of her head. Bogo and the sheep's eyes passed between her and Nick and he knew they were all thinking the same thing. If the prosecution wasn't calling Nick right after his partner then they weren't going to call him at all and hope the defense doesn't notice the 2 foxes with the same name.

Amie walked into the quiet courtroom and didn't waste the sideways glace to check out the gally as she headed to the witness stand. It was certainly filled with reporters trying to get the scoop on the newest "Trial of the Century". She buried the regret that started to bubble for deciding to wear the form-fitting navy suit and not a white lab coat once she saw the todd in the jury box directly in front of her stair her up and down. She sighed internally and pushed her glasses up her muzzle as she reached the bailiff that would swear her in. Once under oath, she climbed the two stairs to the witness stand and gracefully sat to face the prosecutor who stood from behind his table and sauntered in her direction. The Bloodhound buttoned his suit jacket before lifting his eyes to her and asked his first question.

"Please state your full name, title, and occupation for the jury."

"Doctor Amelia Natalie Wilde, I am a professor of Forensic Sciences at Zootopia College and University." As Amie spoke she leaned toward the microphone on the edge of the witness stand.

"What degrees in relation to this case do you hold Doctor?"

She suppressed the chuckle from how painstakingly the questions was worded and instead decided to rattle off the previously approved list as quickly and clearly as possible. In the witness prep she did with the bloodhound they focused on how to not bore the jury by going though her whole educational background but also impress upon them her abilities.

"I have a bachelor's in Forensic Science, a Masters's, and a Doctorate of Forensic Toxicology. I also recently completed a Masters Certificat in Criminal Justice Administration." Emerald eyes passed over the 12 mammals in the jury box. She knew exactly which parts of her education made her not only the perfect expert witness in the case but also why she was asked to do what she did for the ZPD six months ago.

She was sure once the Prosecutor was felt the jury could trust her education he then had to jump the hurdle of proving she was contacted because she was the best option not currently working in the department and not her relation to one of the investigating officers. Hopefully, that relation would not come up.

"Very impressive," the prosecutor's pause was thick in the air leading Amie to look out at the audience to see more than one skeptical face, "do you have a specialty in regards to toxicology, Doctor Wilde?"

Zootopia was not used to foxes with extensive degrees. It happened but rarely in criminal justice. Nick just got on the ZPD force barely a year ago and that would have been a media nightmare if Judy hadn't made sure to highlight how much he helped her with the Nigh Howler attacks. Even as a hero in the city his hiring came with plenty of push back.

"Objection" the defense, a hyena, hackled.

"Under what grounds?" The judge's eyes narrowed on the laughing canine.

"The prosecutor has made it quite clear the Doctor has an impressive education."

The bloodhound turned to the bench and placing on his most innocent face possible "This will be the last question to the doctor's capabilities your honer."

"I will allow it, but this better be the last one, or the female will start to sound like she is bosting. You may answer the question Doctor." The judge, a male koala said with a pass of his hand. Amie clicked her teeth to herself and sat up straighter before answering.

"I am able to identify the most popularly used narcotics on sight" Amie said after she turned from the judge back to the prosecutor.

"Would this ability of yours ever be used in substitute for testing a possible illegal drug sample in a criminal forensics lab?" The Prosecutor's eye went wide. The game had finally begun.

"No."

"Would you ever encourage your students to not test possible evidence in a criminal case because proper toxicology reports are expensive to the ZPD?" With more than little theatrics, the representation of the people turned and walked towards the jury box as he asked this question.

"No."

"And Doctor, If a recently graduated student of yours came to you with knowledge of a high ranking individual in the ZPD Criminal Forensics lab refusing to test evidence; sighting your unusual talent and the price of constantly testing multiple samples, what would you tell that former student to do?" the twist towards her put him directly in front of the jury. As she looked at him she could see their faces. He had them hooked. Now to deliver.

"I would inform that student they needed to report their superior for criminal misconduct." Green eyes meet the heated amber of the hounds and she knew he wasn't going to leave it to her word.

Assistant District Attorney Anthony Roolf crossed the courtroom in seconds to the evidence table and lifted a bag off of it. He read the evidence number off of the bag and walked steadily closer to Amie on the witness stand.

"Doctor Wilde do you recognize this document?" he gently laid the unbagged paper in front of her.

She picked it up and read a few lines to herself. "Yes, it is a print out of an email exchange between myself and Miss. Woolard."

"And what was the context of this conversation?" Roolf pointed to the paper.

"Miss. Woolard, after graduating from ZCU with a Masters in Forensics was working at the ZPD forensic lab in Savanah Central. She had noticed her superior, the head of the lab Mr. Mustelidae" Amie gestured toward the defense table, "excepting evidence. Marking it was tested with the findings of containing illegal narcotics, and then delivering that finding to the Police without ever testing the sample for its true chemical contents."

"OBJECTION!!! The witness is testifying to hearsay!" The hyena practically jumped across the defense table to get to the judge.

The judge slammed his gavel once in warning to the defense before turning eyes to Roolf.

"Doctor Wild is not testifying to hearsay, she is stating the start of the timeline of events that lead up to Mr. Mustelidae's arrest. Without the Doctor receiving this email the injustice occurring in Savanah Central Criminal Forensics Lab may have never come to light."

"I agree." said the irritated marsupial. "Another outburst like that from you Mr. Banzai and I will though you out of my courtroom." Shaking his gavel in the defense's direction.

"Yes sir." The hyena said as he sank back in his chair.

No more of ADA Roolf's questions to Amie were objected too and the questioning continued. Amie described how she knew Miss Woolard from teaching her in several classes and how she responded to the initial email. Insisting the young sheep report the badger who was destroying the sanctity of the criminal justice system. She did not know what transpired after her correspondence with the former student and before Chief Bogo walked into her office with a newly promoted police patrolmammel Wilde, but she did know that once the Cape Buffalo approached her she was going to be dragged into the mess whether she wanted to or not.

_____________________________________________________________________________

Six Months Earlier

Amie was sitting at the professor's desk in an empty classroom grading papers with her headphones in her ears. Her body swayed with the music as she underlined and x'ed papers with a red pen. She was obviously focused on her work to the point Nick wished he wasn't in uniform carrying heavy ZPD equipment standing next to Chief Bogo. He was missing a prim scaring the pants off of the vixen moment. Instead, Chief Bogo cleared his throat loudly. She didn't even stop swaying.

"Ah, yeah boss let me try." after Bogo grunted his approval. Nick put down the equipment and picked up a balled-up piece of paper that didn't make it into the wastebasket. He then expertly pitched it at the vixen's face like the little league superstar he was. It made contact with its intended target. Amie's face reacted instantly as the paper landed in her hands after toppling her glasses and causing an earbud to fall out of her ear. She turned to Nick and Bogo gasping at the insult. She made eye contact with Nick first.

"Why you little. . ." She threw the paperback at Nick. "That is not how you say 'hay I came for an unexpected visit' twerp." Nick caught the paper as it started to sink in front of him a few inches short of his chest. Bogo cleared his throat again causing her to leave her revenge and acknowledge the Chief of ZPD Precinct 1 was addressing her. "I am sorry Doctor this is not a personal call." Nick saw her shoulders slump as she took the males in. Nick realized it was the first time she had seen him in his duty uniform.

"How can I help you, officers?" Amie suddenly sounded more professional then Nick ever heard her, and he watched her present her dissertation.

"Doctor I would like to have a piece of evidence tested on camera," Bogo said gesturing to the film equipment near Nick's feet. Amie's eyes narrowed on Nick and he gave a light shrug. Why Bogo wanted her to do it was plain. She was the best Toxicolgest at the university. Why he dragged Nick across the city to the university to have an expert unconnected to the ZPD test the sample Nick knew but it was an open investigation so could not share with one of the few mammals he trusted with his life.

"I'll have to cancel my 7 o'clock class" Amie clicked away on her phone presumably emailing her students the change in plans. "It will take several hours for the results." She peered out from the side of her eye at the males still in the doorway of the classroom. Bogo lifted an eyebrow but only said "That will be fine."

Nick and the Cheif only arrived on campus at 5 pm and had to stop in with the Campus precinct before locating Amie. It was now 5:45 in the evening. As they left the classroom they found the vixen in she left a note on the Whiteboard.

Doctor Wilde's 6pm lecture canceled. Online discussions still due tonight!!!

Tonight was underlined 3 times, and Nick wondered how many co-eds will complain they didn't know the assignment wasn't pushed back. The three mammals walked down the hall to the elevator and took it down two levels to a floor of just laboratories. Nick tried not to remember his freshman chemistry class that was on this floor but when the old walrus that taught the class passed them he couldn't help but chuckle.

"Hay didn't I light that guys lab coat on fire 7 years ago?" Nick asked once he was out of earshot.

"Yes, and he won't let me live it down. Any time the science department plans a school-wide event he makes sure to say I'm not to go near a bunsen burner." Amie said giving Nick a dirty look. Bogo seamed confused for only a second. Then mumbled under his breath. "So you are related."

Amie stopped in front of a door where though the tinny window near the top only darkness greeted them. Above that door forensics lab, 1 was engraved. She turned the lights on as she strolled in and placed the bag she was carrying on the desk meant for the professors. Nick placed the digital camera case and tripod on the ground next to it and Bogo walked around and whistled.

"No wonder we can't hire you. You have all the shine toys right hear." Bogo said while stopping in front of a piece of machinery Nick couldn't even guess at what it does.

"What do you mean? Most of this stuff is a decade old?"

At Amie's words, Nick and Bogo exchanged a look that could only be described as telling. If Amie noticed it while putting on her lab coat she didn't say anything. She taped a piece of paper to the 2 doors of the lab and locked them. Nick figured they said something similar to the note left on the whiteboard in the classroom, and that she locked the doors because most mammals don't read signs. Working in traffic for the past few months solidified that as a fact in Nick's mind for good.

"What do we got?" Nick watched the Cape Buffalo hand the evidence bag to Amie and he started setting up the tripod. She looked at it briefly before handing it back and started sliding around the lab, turning on machinery and setting up equipment in an almost dance performed by someone who knew where everything they needed was and when they would need it.

The camera was rolling in no time and Bogo handed the bag back to Amie after she identified herself for the camera and he himself. She then described the bag as a ZPD evidence bag read off the case number and that it was initially collected by Officer Nicolas P. Wilde and then tested by an Edger Mustelidae, found to be over two grams of pure cocaine. After saying that out loud Amie looked up from the front of the bag and made direct eye contact with Nick. Her face had a professional what the fuck look to it. Nick again shrugged. Amie clicked her teeth and flipped the bag over in her hands to describe the first evidence seal on the bag had not been cut as it should have been by procedure. Instead, the bag according to her appeared to have been ripped open on the side. This time she looked at Bogo, who just nodded.

She did confirm the yellow evidence tape meant to reseal it was covering the possible hole before cutting into the red tape Nick put on the bag that morning before taking it to the Savannah Central lab. Inside of the bag was another much smaller plastic bag with a zip-top. It was as full of a yet to be determined white powder as it was this morning. Amie emptied the contents of the baggie into a small metal bowl and weighed it. Nick zoomed in on the scales readout as Amie read it out loud.

The vixen continued to her examination of the contents of the baggie. Including putting a small sample of if under a microscope before putting some in a test tube with a soluble solution and running it thought the Mass Spectrometer. As the three waited for the computer to finish analyzing Nick, Bogo, and Amie chatted. Mostly Bogo tried to convince Amie to take a position with the ZPD lab and Amie tried to make fun of Nick's uniform. As a patrolmammel he was wearing the same uniform Judy did. Once they became Corporals or higher they would ware the dress blues to work. Like what he wore to his graduation. Nick knew she knew that, but it didn't stop her from teasing.

"Wheres Judy anyway?" Amie finally asked Nick.

"She went to Bunny Burrow to visit her folks." Nick said not giving the Doctor eye contact. The vixen knew from the moment he got off the graduation stage at the academy he had a crush on the bunny, but he did not want her to know how far he let his feeling go. She knew him better than anyone and instead of pushing the subject she just started to hum. The same song she hummed at the picnic his mother brought for after the graduation. Judy and Nick's mom thought the song choice was related to being a cop would give Nick the opportunity to make the world better when the other females commented on the tune.

The computer's chime brought Nick out of his thoughts and had Amie pushing off in her rolly chair to the screen. "Well, it's not coke. Boys" Amie clicked on the mouse twice and started to roll back to the 2 police officers. Midroll she grabbed a freshly printed page off the printer and presented it to Bogo. Nick was already standing and bringing the camera which they left recording to zoom in over Bogo's shoulder. "Corn Starch, Talc, Magnesium, Silicon, and a bunch of other things but what it boils down to is Baby powder. I can't say brand yet, but I could by tomorrow if I downloaded the composition into the product database." Amie stated smugly.

"No need Doctor. Can you email this to me?" Bogo said standing and giving a good stretch.

"Yes, I can Cheif. It was nice working with you." Amie said shaking paws with the buffalo. Amie resealed the evidence with the ZCU evidence tape and handed the bag back to the chief after signing it, and started cleaning up what was left out. Most of what the Doctor used had already been cleaned and put back while they waited on the mass spec.

"Come on Wild. I'll give you a ride back to the precinct." Chie Bogo yawned and looked at his watch. "My wife is going to kill me."

"If you don't mind Chief I'll take the train in the morning. I think I want to grab some bad Chinese food with the Doc." Nick said. Bogo shrugged. Nick's day off was tomorrow so it didn't matter to his boss what he did that night.

________________________________________________________________________________

Present Day

"Doctor Amelia Wilde." The hyena rolled her name over his tong "You wouldn't happen to be related to Officer Nicolas Wilde of the ZPD? The very officer who investigated the allegations your student Miss Woolard place on my client."

Amie was not surprised by the question. If the defense attorney was worth anything he would need to ask that question.

"Yes, I am related to Officer Nicolas Wilde."

"How?" He smirked as he leaned in close to Amie.

"Our fathers were brothers. We are first cousins." Amie did not mention Nick was the closest thing to a little brother she would ever have or that they were very close as kitts.

Banzai started himself on a roll and he wasn't going to stop until Amie's credibility was shredded.

Don't give them an inch honey.

Amie's mother's voice in her country accent said in her mind.

Or they will take a mile.

Amie put on her best nonchalant face and peered at the cackling hyena through hooded bored eyes.

"You said earlier Doctor that you have the ability to tell "the most popularly used narcotics on sight" is that right?" He asked quoting her own words.

"Yes."

"What narcotics are you referring to in this statement?"

"Powdered cocaine, Nepeta cataria or catnip dried or leaf, and heroin from anywhere from liquid to crack." A female somewhere in the room gasped. "Oh, you do not get to turn the tables on me." Amie thought as she tried not to grind her teeth and struggled to keep her face the picture of professional disinterest.

"How did you acquire such a skill?" Every tooth in the Hyenia's head was visible.

Amie wondered if the hyena was banking on her pleading the 5th and thus discrediting her entire account. Instead, she clicked her teeth, sat back in her chair, and looked up at the defense.

"A professor in my doctorate studies would not sign off on your degree unless you can properly identify three illegal substances on sight. I identified every substance he placed on the table during my final exam. There were 5. One of them was lemongrass. I repeat this test as extra credit to my master's students." She watched Banzai's face fall as he moves away from her as if her words burned.

"No more questions for the witness." The defense said and sat down in his chair.

Mustelidae tried to whisper in his defense's ear probably trying to figure out what just happened. As Amie came down from the witness stand she gave a light smile to the jury. What she saw told her two things about the trial going forward. The jury believed her, and Nick was going to be called to the stand by the defense.

_____________________________________________________________________________

Nick was surprised by how long his cousin was out of the room and started to really worry. He didn't know when he got up to start pacing the room, or when Judy's nose started to twitch but combined with Bogo no longer playing his game just answering calls and watching the clock with ears down pressed by his head. Had Nick feel dread climbing up his throat ready to explode when the door finally opened. "Aims! Straight Aim talk to me!" Nick pleaded, calling her by the nickname only he used. The vixen passed him in a daze, ears down tail dragging behind her, she spilled in the chair directly in front of the door as it closed.

"That bad?" The chief asked looking at the door and swallowing hard.

"No, it went rather well actually." She said sitting up straighter ears perking up. "I just really need a beer"

Nick burst out into laughter. "Well good thing I know a place."

[braincoins]

Okay so, at this point, I have no freaking clue if I’ll get this done by Halloween, esp. since I’ll be in Walt Disney World for a week, BUT just so y’all know what I’m working on.

Take Max Brooks’ World War Z. Take Mira Grant/ @seananmcguire‘s Newsflesh series. Mix them together. That’s the AU I dropped our beloved characters into this creepy season. Possibly best summed up (right now, at least), as:

Lance: YOU WERE A ZOMBIE?!?! Shiro: ... ... I got better.

and of course you know it’ll be shallura ‘cause I continue to have needs

Anyway, I started work on it before Happy Fun Radiation Times began to kick my ass (I still have two more treatments [groan]), came back today, re-read and did a quick editing pass on what I had, and started adding to it. Teaser.. rather long teaser, actually, sorry ‘bout that, below the cut:

           They were devolving into their own squabbles and dirty comments, and she felt herself bristling. She cleared her throat and yelled above the chaos, “INFECTED CAN BE CURED!”

           They all stopped dead and looked at her.

           “Bullshit. Bullshit,” the one-eyed one said again for emphasis. “You can’t cure a zombie with anything ‘cept a bullet.”

           “You can’t cure a zombie,” she agreed, “but you can cure an Infected. They act differently than zombies do AND they are, just barely, still alive. What kills Infected – outside of bullets – is starvation and malnutrition, exposure to the elements, occasionally another illness they  had before being turned that isn’t being treated, or an injury that festers – most often the very bite wound that turned them. Because they mainly bite and tear off a chunk, eat that, and move on. THEIR bite transmits the virus that creates more Infected.

           “Once an Infected dies, they become a true zombie, and true zombies just eat. They don’t care about leaving the target alive to spread the disease, but a virus wants to be spread. That’s what the Infected do: spread the virus.

           “Technically, being bitten by a zombie is only dangerous in the sense of the bacterial transmission from their mouths, same as a normal, living human, only probably much worse due to the lack of oral hygiene and the rather…carnivorous diet.” She cleared her throat. “Only the Infected spread the zombie virus, and if you can find one, they can be cured.”

           Silence reigned until the young girl spoke up again. “You’re saying they can be cured. Are you talking theoretically or…?”

           Allura smiled and raised her voice a little to call, “Captain.”

           The door opened to admit a young man her age in a white t-shirt, gray hoodie & sweatpants, and standard issue shoes. He would have blended into any crowd and disappeared were it not for his handsome good looks and broad shoulders… and the strange shock of white hair, the angry scar over his nose, and the fact that he was missing his right arm. (Though in the aftermath of the Z War, missing a limb wasn’t all that uncommon.) He walked over to stand next to her, door closing behind him, and cleared his throat.

           “My name is Takashi Shirogane,” he said. “I’m… I was a captain in the Air Force. And… I used to be Infected.”

           Everyone in the room jumped up with shouts of “bullshit” and “lies” and “hoax,” save for a young man with dark hair who just stared at him.

           “I TORE A LITTLE GIRL’S LARYNX OUT!” he yelled at them.

           They shut up again, and sat down.

           Allura winced and laid a hand on his arm. “Shiro, you don’t have to…”

           He pulled away from her and continued to glare at them. “WITH MY TEETH. And it felt right, it felt good, it felt like exactly what I should be doing! Do you know what it’s like, to be cured now and to still have the memory of her blood in my mouth? NO, YOU DON’T!”

           The tears ran down his cheeks but he continued, “I was bitten on the right arm. My buddies cut it off to try to save me. It didn’t work. The virus moves fast. Most of the rest of my scars are after I turned. Even some of my hair went white. I don’t know how that happened.

           “I bashed my head through a glass window to try to get at some people. That’s where I got this,” he traced the scar across his nose. “I didn’t care that I was bleeding. I only had one thought: Bite. Bite. It wasn’t even ‘feed,’ it was bite and that was all I cared about. It was the only thing I cared about. To me, humans weren’t human. Or maybe they were, but they weren’t like me. They were things to bite, to feel the tear of skin and the gush of blood. THAT’S ALL.” He hung his head. “That’s all I could think about.”

           Allura pushed herself forward to take over the narrative again. “We found him when he was still recently turned. As you can tell, he hadn’t lost much muscle mass yet. He hadn’t started to deteriorate. There may be a point at which we can’t turn them back, where they’re too far gone physically to survive being cured.”

           “Look, what do you want from us?” the one-eyed man said quietly.

           “I want a few people from your unit to come help us in the field. And I have something to offer in exchange.”

           “What’s that?”

           She held up the small, sleek, thin silver box with a dish antenna the size of a large man’s hand attached to it. “This is…”

           “…an iPod. I haven’t seen one of those in ages,” the young girl said.

           “…a scanner,” she continued as if the interruption hadn’t happened. “And yes, we used iPods; we were able to get our hands on a lot of them, and they were easy to convert.” She cleared her throat. “This can correctly tell you who’s a zombie and who’s Infected, as well as who’s a living breathing human.” She set it down on the desk. “And these,” she picked up what looked like a smoke grenade, “are filled with the cure in gaseous form.”

           “Uhhh,” said a large young man near the back, “doesn’t that just make a bunch of normal humans around a bunch of zombies? I mean, if what you’re saying is true…”

           “Well, yes, but that’s why you use the scanner to find and take out the zombies first. The cure won’t work on them. The cure is nothing but smoke to us – which we will cough and choke on, like any other smoke – and to the zombies, but they don’t breathe, so they won’t care. The Infected will cough and choke and fall to the ground. Then they start having seizures, but once the air clears, they’re mostly cured.”

           “Mostly,” repeated one of them. It was the young dark-haired man who’d been staring at Shiro since he’d walked in.

           “Mostly,” she agreed with a nod. “Shoot them then with this,” she pulled out a small dart, “and they’ll be fully cured. The gaseous form starts the cure, but it’s not enough to cure them usually: it’s too diffuse. This is concentrated, and it’ll finish the work the gas started. It can also work on its own, if you only have a single Infected to deal with, but for large crowds, the cannister will work better.”

           “Do you remember being cured?” the young girl asked Shiro. She seemed very intent upon this and upon him.

           His brow furrowed. “I remember seizing up. I was shot with the tranq dart, not gassed, and as an Infected, you don’t really feel pain. I knew I was bleeding badly when I got this,” he pointed to the scar over his nose again, “but it didn’t hurt, and I didn’t care that I was bleeding. I was just aware of it. So I was aware of a poke, but then when I started seizing that was when things changed. I was… scared. For the first time in a long time, I was scared of what was happening to me, and then there was pain again, and I was screaming.” He closed his eyes. “I thought I was dying, and I was glad. I was glad I was dying and that was when I realized something had changed because I hadn’t felt good about anything except biting people in weeks. Everything went dark, and when I woke up, I was in a bed in a room. I mean, I guess it was technically a cell: I couldn’t open the door from the inside. But there was a window at the top, no glass, just some bars, and I yelled for some water. And food. And that’s when I realized I was… me again. Or at least more me than I had been.”

           Allura broke in again. “We monitored him for weeks. Took samples. He reads fully human, slightly malnourished.”

           “I still think this is all bullshit. How do we know any of this is true?”

           “I was there.”

           Everyone turned to look at dark-haired young man who had spoken.

           “I was there right after he was bit and we had to…”

           “Keith?” Shiro moved around the desk towards him. “Is that really you?”

           “Is that really you?” he shot back at him. “I saw you get bit, I helped hold you down while we cut your arm off... if you’re really Shiro.”

           Shiro stopped and considered that. “Ask.”

           “How old are you?”

           He arched an eyebrow. “Well, I’d say I’m twenty-five; you’d say I’m six and a quarter ‘cause you’re a fucking brat and I’m a leap year baby.” He grinned.

           She thought Keith might have stopped breathing. “How’d you meet me?”

           “They sent me to your school to recruit the kids about to graduate. You gave me a hard time because you hate authority, but you wanted to fly, I could see it in your eyes, I could almost feel it. And the first time you got in the simulator, you blew everyone away. You even beat my top score. You wanted to fly, you wanted the thrill of it, and you had natural goddamn talent. So I convinced you…”

           “…that putting up with the bullshit was worth being able to fly the sort of planes I could only get my hands on in the USAF.”

           Shiro smiled. “It’s good to see you again, Keith.”

           And Keith launched himself out of the old school desk and into a hug that Shiro returned instantly. “You were dead.”

           “I was mostly dead. Turns out mostly dead is slightly alive.”

           “Oh, shut the fuck up with your cheesy movie quotes.”

           “But you caught it.”

           “You made me watch it like a dozen times.” Keith sniffled against Shiro’s chest.

           Allura looked around at them. “Convinced yet?”

[haro-ra]

Idea from @spop-prompts

Adora bunched the blanket around her shoulders tighter, determinedly ignoring the cold.

For the attempted shattering of the moonstone…

She turned another page of another book. How many pages had her tired eyes strained over? How many books?

...for her role in the attempted murder of Queen Angella...

Another masked and vaguely spherical servant set down a cup of tea—lidded so as to avoid spillage upon the ancient texts—and a plate with warm, hearty vegetation that would leave neither crumbs or stains next to Adora. Adora mumbled her distracted thanks to the person whose body and clothing were better suited to the cold than her own and reached out numbly for the fork.

...for her role in the capture and torture of Princess Glimmer…

Adora hadn’t ever bothered to count the number of meals brought to her in this place, so it was hardly like she had lost count. She ate and drank fast, for the warmth, sure, but mostly just to get the action out of the way. Her eyes never left the page, and she turned it.

...and for seeking out the destruction of the balance, foundation, and structure of Etheria itself…

Adora stood in sudden excitement, blanket slipping, forgotten, from her shoulders as her eyes traced the words as fast as she could possibly read them. Then she read the passage again, to make sure, even as her breath picked up and her heart thudded in her ears.

...I hereby sentence Force Captain Catra of the Horde to death.

She’d found what she was looking for.

—

“Glimmer! Bow!” Adora shouted before Swift Wind had even finished landing. Her friends were there to greet her, looking excited and relieved to see her back in one piece.

“Adora!” came twin shouts in return, the two of them immediately tackling her into a hug before her feet touched the soil.

“We’ve been so worried about you!” said Bow, not an admonishment, just the truth.

“Did you find a way to help Catra?” Glimmer asked, pink eyebrows knit in worry.

“I did,” Adora said, pulling out the tablet she’d borrowed from Bow and pulling up the photo she’d taken. “But I need your help. This is going to take… some convincing.”

Bow and Glimmer looked at each other, a conversation passing between their eyes, and then they smiled at her. “You can count on us,” Glimmer promised.

—

The traditions of Brightmoon were very different from the traditions of the Horde, which were mostly just the stripped-down basics of the traditions of the Desert Throne that Hordak had half-accepted as a way to keep the peace among people who remembered the time before he landed in Etheria. Adora had expected some differences, since everything was different here, but wow. There was a lot more tradition involved than she had planned on.

Even so. Step one was the most crucial part of all, and that part? That part transcended cultures.

First came the question.

“Catra,” Adora said. The sound didn’t reverberate down empty, stone halls like it would in the Fright Zone’s prison. Bright Moon’s was, like everything else in this place, pretty. Pretty, clean, pastel. Catra didn’t look up from her prisoner’s mat, which Adora recognized was completely indistinguishable from her own bed. It would’ve been funny, to know that Glimmer and Bow had gotten her bed from one of Bright Moon’s literal jail cells. But as it was, as Catra would see it, it was just a normal bed in a pretty room that served as further mockery to Catra’s situation.

Adora wasn’t good at reading others. Even her best friend. Even her Catra. But from what she’d learned in the terrible, wonderful years since leaving Catra’s side, she knew that Catra would look around and see the pretty walls and floors and bed and gate and feel them as an insult.

“Catra, it’s me,” Adora said, not knowing what else to say.

“Hey, Adora.” Catra’s voice was flat. No mockery, no coy charm, nothing. Two words like dead rocks hitting the ground, thunk thunk.

The gate didn’t creak when it swung open. Didn’t even squeak a little at the end of the hinge. It glided smoothly, soundlessly, and Adora’s footsteps were the only sounds to make Catra’s ears twitch.

“I found a loophole,” Adora said. “A way for you to avoid execution.”

Catra lifted her chin from her knees and her eyes from the mat, fixing Adora with a blank stare. Adora pressed her lips thin, then continued.

“I know… you’re doubting me. I know that every time I’ve tried to protect you or save you or help you, I’ve either made it worse, or I didn’t actually manage to do it. I couldn’t protect you from Shadow Weaver. I couldn’t—I didn’t, help you in training. I kept getting your hopes up only to let you down, and I’m sorry.”

Catra’s ears were forward, her eyes unblinking, all of her attention fixed with devastating, unwavering intensity on Adora.

“And… I know you don’t need saving. That you’re capable, and you’re so, so smart, and you’re a survivor and ambitious and a menace and you’ve probably got at least two plans on how you’re going to get out of here and run off into the wild and lead a new life with all your crazy ambitious awesomeness. I know you don’t need my help. But, I want to give it to you. I want to keep you safe, safe for real, and I want you here with me, and to show you all the cool things I’ve discovered and introduce you to my friends and to show everyone how amazing you are and come home to you at night.” Adora took a deep breath. Why was this the hard part? “Because I love you.”

Fluffed fur, mirror blushes, the words finally said where neither of them could take them back.

“So,” Adora said, her knees slowly sinking down to the mat in front of her best friend, “Catra,” Adora said, her hands reaching out and folding over the scarred and clawed hand of her first and only love, “will you marry me?”

—

Apparently ceremonies happened before legal signings, in Bright Moon, but since this was a special case the two were flipped. Adora and Catra didn’t actually care, since in the Horde the only things that happened were the legal signings. With Catra freed from Shadow Weaver, the Horde, prison, and death itself, she set right into her natural way of making her presence everybody else’s problem. Everybody but Adora, who was too happy to have her best friend back, to have her best friend love her back, to get mad at her antics.

The wedding of She-ra was a world-wide hot topic. Everyone had contributions they wanted to make and advice they wanted to give. Perfuma and her people sent over gargantuan floral displays of every conceivable type and arrangement, calling them “samples” and asking which ones Catra and The She-ra liked best. Mermista offered catering, Frosta sent warm regards (which Adora had to explain was A Big Deal), Netossa and Spinnerella helped decorate, Castaspella and the other mages sent blessing after magical blessing, and even Scorpia, despite the new pressures of her place as ruler of the Desert Throne, sent assistance and a long comic depicting her absolute joy at their upcoming union.

Planning, preparing, and gathering everything and everyone took months, and Catra basked in the attention. Force Captain Catra, bride of She-ra, the unkillable, the desirable, the bold. Despite She-ra initiating the world’s attention, it was Catra who seized and kept it. Adora, better suited to her place at her lover’s side, watched on with pride and happiness.

—

Scorpia and Entrapta stood on one side of the patio, Bow and Glimmer on the other. The Moonstone of Bright Moon hovered high above them, and before them stretched the crystalline lake they’d once fought in years ago. Flowers bobbed gently in the still waters, too multitudinous to even attempt to count, and all along the palace exterior and shore of the lake stood happy faces, watching the ceremony of She-ra—who was really just Adora—and Catra. Bow and Scorpia were already crying. Their girlfriends held their hands (or, well, claw, in Scopria’s case). With the hand not holding Bow’s, Glimmer reached up and the Moonstone began to glow.

“By the authority of the Moonstone,” Glimmer said as Catra and Adora approached the steps leading down into the lake, “I bind these souls together. To love, to hold, to cherish and protect. To stand beside and value, and always to respect.” As Glimmer spoke, Adora and Catra walked, hand and hand, into the cheery waters, flowers parting as they passed, the folds of Adora’s dress and Catra’s robe rippling as they dragged through the water. “In hardship and in wealth, in sickness and in health, when the heart is sweet or har’d, your souls nevermore to part.”

Adora and Catra’s heads submerged, holding their breaths, and they smiled with puffed up cheeks at each other. The water was so clear, they could see each other just as well as they might above the surface. Adora turned to rise back up the steps, but Catra did not release her hand. Instead, she tugged on it sharply, darting forward and kissing Adora beneath the surface, light shimmering through the dancing waters and shadows passing over them beneath the flowers. Adora kissed back with surprise, and their laughter literally bubbled out of them. They rose to the surface still smiling, both pairs of hands held fast, and their foreheads fell together as natural as they had all their lives.

“Catra and Adora rise from the waters with fresh hearts and fresh eyes,” Glimmer called out, her crisp voice booming out to the distant crowd. “No longer one and another, but two souls intertwined; rejoice!”

The crowd burst into raucous cheers, Netossa even throwing up a few magical nets that burst into color before fading midair. Scorpia and Glimmer helped Catra and Adora out of the pool, Scorpia immediately pulling Catra into a weepy, bone-crushing hug.

“Aaa, I can’t believe I remembered all that!” Glimmer exclaimed as she and Bow—also still definitely crying—hugged Adora just as viciously. Entrapta perched on Scorpia’s shoulder and her thick pigtails began shaking water from Catra’s hair as she babbled on about the fascinating implications of Bright Moon’s traditions, comparing them to Dryl’s.

“You did great,” Adora praised, feeling like she could be literally glowing, with how good she felt. A sharp claw tapped lightly on her shoulder and she pulled out of the hug just enough to see Catra grinning at her, a full show of fangs and sharp eyes.

“Hey Adora,” she purred, and kissed her again.