#the genius files

[book--brackets]

[shadowbrightshine]

I gotta admit, I'm slightly afraid of driers. Not because they could explode.

But there was this book series where these kids had to solve mysteries to literally survive because a creepy old guy was chasing them across the country to kill them. The Genius Files.

One of the traps was trapping them inside driers and it went into detail of how it would kill them. And I was really scared by it. Now I kinda check it multiple times just to ensure my cat isn't inside. Or my little sister. My cat likes to hop into the laundry machine and it's hard to get her out. (We always get her out. Obviously, I'm not drowning my freaking cat) She hasn't quite done the same for the drier but I do not want my cat dying that way.

I mean, it also helped me go to one of the coolest places. House on the Rock. It was awesome and no one tried to kill me there.

[kaiminluu]

"when you slam the door i think you know, that you won't be away too long, you know that i'm not that strong"

hi @campbyler you destroyed me

[deadwooddross]

hruuuh. gruuh. covid booster cost $200 smackeroos without insurance and i shrimply did not have time to sniff around for secret freebies. oogh, agh. mi wallet. I'll be real with you all I'm doing Just Terrible rn so I cant really offer any doodles or anything rn, but if you wanna throw me a couple bucks on kofi, or buy a couple stickies left on there whilst I attempt to navigate the few droplets of social care this godforsaken country has, would be. appreciated https://ko-fi.com/deadwooddross

[alltheshadesofamber]

My personal interpretation of Kavetham is that Alhaitham is aware of his feelings for Kaveh and he’s just accepted them, shrugged and continued living his life. It’s just a fact to him now. And if someone asked him if he ever planned on telling Kaveh, he’d be like, “It’s none of his business.”

[sagan-starstuff]

XF Meta: Scully's Medical Training Timeline

At the request of @randomfoggytiger, I wanted to do my damnedest to make Scully's education and training timeline make even a little sense. I'm a physician (specifically a specialist in adult infectious diseases), and it's fairly clear to me that CC and Co probably didn't actually talk to any doctors about how medical training works. Love my girl - I'm a Scully Effect kid, I don't think I'd be a doctor at all if it weren't for the inspiration of Dana Scully. But her timeline is...iffy at best.

Disclaimer: My medical school and post-med school training occurred from 2009-2018, Scully's occurred in the 1980's-90's. From what I can tell, the durations of many residencies and fellowships don't seem to have changed much, but I can't say that for certainty for all programs at all institutions. I am also from the US, so I cannot speak to medical training in other countries.

Our girl was born in 1964, and so unless she skipped a grade (which some schools would do if students were classified as "gifted" or otherwise exceptional, she would have graduated from high school at age 18 in 1982 and went straight to college. Let's assume she didn't skip a grade, for the sake of argument.

You have to have a Bachelor's degree to apply to medical school. These degrees typically take 4 years, though if someone arrives at college with credits from dual-enrollment high school classes or AP exam credits OR if they take summer classes some people can complete them in 3 years. I don't know what the availability of dual enrollment or AP classes was like in the early 80's (and like CC, I'm too lazy to do the research to find out), so we can assume that Scully graduated from college in 1986.

Medical school is 4 years long - no shortening this at that point in time, and even now in almost all cases. So that puts medical school graduation in 1990 IF she's following a traditional timeline and went straight from college to medical school.

Now, if someone is going to go into practice they have to do a residency in at least one of a variety of specialties (Internal Medicine, Pediatrics, Surgery, etc.) in order to be board certified and practice independently. There are very, very few job options in clinical medicine if you DON'T do a residency, so if you want to practice, you have to do it. Residencies can be anywhere from 3-5 years, depending on the specialty. You can also further subspecialize after a residency by doing one or more fellowships (typically 1-3 years depending on the fellowship) before sitting for your board certification exams and starting independent practice. For example - after medical school I did a 3-year residency in adult internal medicine, then a 2 year fellowship in adult infectious diseases to be eligible to sit for the boards and enter my specialty, so 5 years further training after medical school before I could get a job, get board certified, and practice.

Scully is a forensic pathologist. She would have had to do a 3 or 4 year pathology residency (both were options at the time) followed by a 1 year forensic pathology fellowship. You CANNOT perform autopsies right out of medical school, if you are going to be a forensic pathologist you HAVE to do this training. So, following a traditional timeline this puts her as having completed forensic pathology training in 1994 or 1995. Pilot starts March 7th, 1992, so this is loooooong after she's canonically already an FBI agent and teaching at the academy.

But our girl's a smart cookie, so let's take a little leeway with her timeline. Let's say she skipped a grade some time in K-12. This puts high school graduation in 1981. Let's say she ALSO graduates with a bunch of AP credit and does summer semesters and finishes her undergraduate degree in Physics in 3 years. This puts her as starting medical school in 1984, with graduation in 1988. She'd still need to do that pathology residency and forensic pathology fellowship - let's assume a 3 year residency, then 1 year fellowship, so she'd finish training in 1992.

Still doesn't fit.

Let's go totally off the rails here - we know Scully was recruited out of medical school to the FBI, so she didn't do a traditional residency at all - UNLESS the FBI has an internal forensic pathology residency. It would HAVE to be accelerated in some way - some programs combine residency and fellowship by giving less elective time and more focus to the fellowship content. It's not common but they exist. Let's say in theory the FBI has an accelerated forensic pathology residency that takes 3 years, in addition to the 20 weeks of the FBI academy training. This has her finishing residency AND FBI academy training some time in 1991.

This is the ONLY way she could have finished forensic pathology training AND the FBI academy with enough time to be a fully certified forensic pathologist and FBI agent with some time left to teach at the FBI academy before being assigned to the X-Files on March 7th, 1992.

I can suspend my disbelief enough to be on board with this. You'd have to be pretty damned special, which we know she is, to get recruited out of medical school by the FBI. Maybe they even developed the accelerated combined residency/fellowship just for her! She's Dana Katherine Motherf***ing Scully, people!

Now, IWTB is where things get REALLY unbelievable. (Disclaimer: I have not watched IWTB since seeing it in theaters in 2008. I'll get around to rewatching it someday soon. Probably with a bottle of wine. Not a glass. A bottle.)

Mulder and Scully go on the run in 2002. We don't know how long they were in the wind, but by 2008, she's been allowed to resume a career and is practicing at Our Lady of Sorrows. Clearly in pediatrics - but general pediatricians sure as hell don't do stem cell transplants, so she'd almost certainly have to be a pediatric oncologist. We aren't told what her specialty is specifically, but that's what she'd have to be to do a stem cell transplant.

(That scene in the OR isn't even what stem cell transplants LOOK LIKE but that's a rant for another day, back to my point.)

MEDICAL BOARDS DON'T JUST LET YOU CHANGE YOUR SPECIALTY FOR FUNSIES.

(Deep breaths. Serenity now. Ok, let's do this.)

Scully would have had to do an ENTIRELY NEW residency AND fellowship in order to practice as a pediatric oncologist. Pediatrics residency is 3 years long. Pediatric Hematology/Oncology fellowship is 3 years long. In order for this to be even remotely possible, she would have had to START residency in 2002 to finish fellowship by 2008 and start her job at Our Lady of Sorrows.

And she's a former FBI agent harboring a known felon, on the run from government officials and alien hybrids who want her and Mulder dead.

There is absolutely no way even the smallest, most hard-up pediatric residency program is going to accept her with that hanging over her head. I'm not going to get into all the details of how rigorous and stressful the post-medical school residency application and match process is, but even if she didn't apply until she KNEW it was safe to come out from underground, she'd still have to explain a multi-year gap in her resume/CV to the program directors. Multi-year gaps in career and training without a reasonable explanation like a medical issue, time off to care for an ailing family member, time off for research, time away in a different, legitimate career are NOT looked on kindly when applying for residency positions. She would have a HELL of a time getting into a totally different residency.

It could happen - if anyone could do it, she could. But there's absolutely no way there's enough time for her to complete that training by 2008.

"But sagan-starstuff, it's CC, it's X-Files, we know there was no show bible and no one but the fans gave a shit about continuity or things making sense, there's no logic just vibes"

I KNOW, OK. I KNOW. And I love this insane, beautiful masterpiece anyway. I love exploring the possibilities of how and when it all could have happened with my fellow insane Philes who work so hard to glean meaning and order from this perfect mess of a show.

But couldn't CC have talked to one (1) doctor about what medical training is like at some point between 1993 and 2018? Just one?

Anyway. Yeah. That's my meta. Scully's training timeline makes no goddamned sense. Compels me, though.

@randomfoggytiger, this is for you. Honorable mention to @precedex-files who I ranted about this with in messages a while back.

[dr-lizortecho]

[saewokhrisz]

bro is pondering!!!

[littlekingbergara]

was just thinking about how amazing it is that weird wonderful world and ghost files exist at the same time from the same company. you have the same minds, the same hosts, the same team and yet the shows are like day and night. www reminds us of the wonder and whimsy and joy all around us while ghost files showcases the world's darker side in its tragedies and horrors. and that they're able to execute both shows each with its own finely-tuned aesthetic and its own little universe is really a beautiful display of how much Talent and Love exists at watcher and it's so so special.

[crocrubies]

HUMAN CENTIPEDE

[book--brackets]

[susartwork]

Underwizard alternative timelines:

Like 90% of these are angst timelines and the other 10% are self indulgent ones, sorry not sorry

Pacifist (the original one)

Future (the original but post barrier)

Genocide

Neutrals I don't think we need a list of all of them, do we?

UWU Infection Never add a U to UW. This is a post barrier timeline where a UwU virus spreads terrorizing Ebott's Town. Frisk, as the monster's ambassador, will have a lot of work to do to ensure everyone's safety from the cute virus.

REDress Previously known as the "Amalgamate" timeline, now it was completely rewritten. The families of the amalgamates took revenge on Sans and Alphys, injecting them too with Determination, melting them into amalgams as well...

War Rewind Flowey and Sans mess with the resets, mistakenly send themselves back to the time of the war between humans and monsters. Flowey dies, but Sans, adopting baby Chara to save them from their fate, allows Asriel to survive in the future and become king. Now all humans who fall underground will be treated as friends. This timeline was fairly inspired by Timetale! And also by my chats with @ask-dcf :3

Hopeless Timeline Flowey grows bored, and decides to torture Sans with Save Files and Resets to see how far that would go. The story then starts to take interesting turns as I RP it. This timeline is somewhat important so here's the latest ref sheets: [Hopeless UW!Sans] [Hopeless UW!Frisk] [Hopeless UW!Dwerby] Here's a chrono link to read right from the start! But pls note this.

Underground's Insanity Previously known as the "Hopeless Queen Alphys Timeline" (the name was too long). The genocide (?) version of the Hopeless Timeline. It begins as a Queen Alphys ending, to then take a Horrortale-like turn, with some angsty Salphys who has to face Frisk, the strongest hunter wizard to ever exist.

Playbackwizard Playbacktale x Underwizard Too spoilery to UW's story talk about it now 👀

Helioswizard Heliostale x Underwizard

Something Magical Something New (Killer!Sans) x Underwizard

"What if...? OC" My UTMV outcodes swap backstory with the UW crew: Basic - UW!Sans | Alphysis - UW!Alphys | Clone - UW!Frisk | Quasar - UW!Papyrus & Flowey | Kyria - UW!Undyne

° FANMADE ALTERNATIVE TIMELINES ♡ °

Disbelief UW!Papyrus Disbelief Papyrus x Underwizard

Horrorwizard Horrortale x Underwizard

Axewizard Axetale x Underwizard

Dustwizard Dusttale x Underwizard

All of these above were made by @alittlegreenghost!

Underwizard alternative versions:

Wizardfell Underwizard x Underfell (planned remake)

Wizardswap Underwizard x Underswap (planned remake)

Overbeast All the events of Underwizard but reversed...? Hunter wizards -> beasts (aka monsters with human souls)

UnderWoZArD The crappy version of Underẁ̶̙i̴͈̚z̸̼̾-̴̢̄-̷̨͗ ̶̹̂A̴̺͂L̵̥̽L̶̗͆ ̸̛̟H̶̝͛Ä̶͔Ḭ̷͗Ļ̸͝ ̵̛͈W̴̭̚O̴̺̍Z̷̺͝ ̷͕̊T̷̋͜Ḧ̵̨́Ẻ̷̠ ̶͉͑E̸͎͛M̸̮̕P̷͈̍Ḙ̷̎R̵̲̆Ŏ̴̯R̴͇̆

Inversowizard Inversotale x Underwizard

Tartaroswizard Tartarostale x Underwizard

Wizardchess Underwizard x Chesstale Frisk and Flowey are stuck in a endless chess battle to decide the fate of the underground.

Zombieverse A mix of many AUs characters, such as Underwizard, living in a zombie apocalypse

A L I V E x Underwizard Idk what to call it. It's basically the UW crew but with the backstory of the ALIVE crew. Sorta. ALIVE's story is difficult to apply to UW.

Wizardnovela Underwizard x Undernovela

° FANMADE ALTERNATIVE VERSIONS ♡ °

Planet Flash - by @yanair25 Fusion of a series whose name I forgot (sorry) and many other AUs, such as Underwizard

Hopeless UW!Sans x LN (Bucket) - @axmoth Hopeless in Little Nightmares

UW!Aine x LN (Breach) - @parniathedevil Aine in Little Nightmares

XWizard - by @parniathedevil Xtale x Underwizard

Edit: I have deleted some timelines/versions from this masterpost because I don't find them interesting or important.

[goddesspharo]

Sorry, nobody down here but the FBI's most unwanted. [Top Gun: Maverick The X-Files AU]

[celestialsun123]

If I had to recommend any one show or episode of a show to someone, I would hands down say X-Files, season 5: episode 12.

But specifically, you'd have to at least watch the first season to get a grip on the characters.

Sorry Rise, I love you, but you just aren't as good as this masterpiece.

GIF spam below :D

(Fun fact I can recite that whole little mini-monologue by memory)

[benoitblanc]

mulder and scully. you agree

[starshipgenius]