#the joe schmo show

[urfavesarequadranted]

Kip and The Hutch from The Joe Schmo Show are kismesis?

Steve 'The Hutch' Hutchinson and Carlos 'Kip' Calderas from The Joe Schmo Show are kismeses!

[namnworb]

Carlos 'Kip' Calderas from The Joe Schmo Show

[brookheimer]

i’m always saying this

[tvthemesongs]

The Joe Schmo Show intro

[soigneetcharmant]

these two guys in truman show-type shows where everyone is an actor except them legitimately have the exact same energy

[falling-down-the-scroll-hole]

"You were real Joe," *fights back tears* "you were real..."

[nintendowiig]

Sumo wrestler Kristen Wiig tiny

[leesielex]

So anti Dany's love to say that without dragons Dany would be nothing, that she relies far too much on her dragons, even in the books. I would like to say, you must not have read the books in a long time and are most definitely conflating that with the show and your own fanon. But also, tell me with a straight face the Stark's don't rely just as much if not MORE on their direwolves in the books than Dany does on her dragons?

Specifically Jon, Robb, and Bran but even Rickon as little as he is in the books, and Arya using her warging skills to give her an advantage as well. The only one who doesn't use their direwolf as much as Dany is Sansa b/c Lady dies so early.

The other point I heard made today in the same post was Dany relies too much on fire and blood and doesn't listen to her advisors and have any strategy. Which is a completely contradictory statement.

In the books, Dany uses her dragons exactly ONE time in Astapor to burn Kraznys. The dragons are no bigger than dogs with wings and barely can burn one man. It is the Unsullied she uses to sack the city (after coming up with the strategy to do so on her own). The only other time Drogon unleashes his fire is in Qarth. Dany doesn't order him to, doesn't say Dracarys in the books, that happens in the SHOW. In the books, Drogon sees what is happening to Dany and that these warlocks mean to do her harm and Drogon unleashes his flame and fury on the HOU on his own accord.

For the entire first book, Dany does not have her dragons and everything she accomplished was on her own and of her own merit. She gains the strength and power to stand up for herself and others. She eats an entire horse heart. As a 13 year old girl, she marries a 32 year old warlord from a completely foreign culture she is thrown into and doesn't even know the language. She acclimates and adjusts, learns the language, learns the culture; learns of her people; and becomes their khaleesi. She learns how to be respected by Drogo. And if she wasn't worthy she wouldn't have been able to hatch those dragons because Targaryens had tried to bring them back for over a century and failed until her.

It is entirely contradictory to say that Dany only knows Fire and Blood and relies on it and her dragons too much and that she ignores her advisors because it is her advisors that are telling her she is too gentle, too merciful, and she needs to use her dragons. Her advisors are the ones telling her to use her biggest advantage and bring fire and blood to her enemies! Even Ser Barristan! While Dany is missing on drogon, the Yunkaii having taken hostages including Daario, they want the dragons killed for the hostages return. When asked what Barristan will do when they refuse an alternate offer he replies "Fire and Blood."

It's preposterous to say she has no strategy because in the BOOKS every city she conquers is HER strategy. It was her idea to deceive and trick the slave masters and free astapor. Dany was the one who made them pack up all the slave collars into carts and lug them to the next city to shoot them into the city to inspire slave revolts. It was her who came up with every idea to take every city from Astapor to Meereen. She weighs all her strategies carefully and weighs every piece of advice offered to her and only ignores her advisors because she sees a better option. It was the SHOW that gave all her strategy to the MEN around her, whether it was Jorah or Daario or Barristan or Tyrion even.

And the main point, why is it always bad for Dany to use her dragons one time against like one person to take a city, yet Jon who uses Ghost often to fight and survive or Robb who always used Grey Wind in battle and used Grey Wind to scout the land are never mentioned how they would be nothing compared to any other Joe Schmo in the books without their direwolves? It's a Fricken fantasy series and while characters like Cersei, Littlefinger, and Sansa are meant to be political, characters like Jon and Dany and Bran (who uses his direwolf more than anyone uses their magical creatures) are the FANTASY characters, though they do intersect with political as well, their main focus will be on defeating the OTHERS who are also fantastical characters and won't be defeated by politicking but with the help of the fantasy companions by their sides!

The hypocrisy and ridiculous standards y'all expect Dany to live up to but your fave character couldn't do is just ridiculous and it needs to stop but I know it never will.

*I didn't come up with all these ideas all on my own. There was discussion about the post on another social media. I just needed to vent in one place.

[prettyboykatsuki]

sae has weirdly been my fav blorbo for a long time but when considering his type I've come to realise that he probably wouldn't be into nerdy or not conventionally pretty girls. + I don't think that sae is the type to commit at all like. he's just there to fuck around and then leave and if anything the fb trope would be more fitting for his character (imo). and everytime I read fluff about him it's just so ooc to me I can't help it 😭 I mean he does have a lot of toxic traits and could be considered 'a horrible person' but yea idk you always have this deep analysis of characters I was wonder what you'd think about sae and this topic specifically haha hope I didn't bother

i disagree with this characterization of him for a lot of reason

i don't pay a lot of attention to what the fanon interpretation of sae is and im sure this aligns with his image but i dont personally think that this assessment of his character makes a lot of sense. i do understand where it comes from though !!!

i believe that a lot of this miscommunication of his characterization stems from his relationship to rin, but i've broken that down as to why i don't think sae hates rin. in fact in his own way i think he views his own harsh behavior as a way to shield rin from reality (though it had the opposite of his intended affect) i also don't believe that sae is a vapid or shallow player off-field, and that's largely in contrast to his personality before he left for spain and after.

sae is always viewed to be cold, blunt, and serious but he is also deeply affectionate of rin in their adolescence. his major change happens while we're overseas and while we don't know yet what happened specifically - it's clear to me that something borderline traumatic happened. this type of change of character through rigorous training happens to kunigami through the wildcard system and this type of betrayal that leads to betterment is a theme in bluelock as well (i.e. nagireo)

im of the belief that saes arrogance and crass way of speaking developed largely as a defense mechanism as his goal of being a striker was shattered through playing in spain. in the same way kunigami views being a "hero" through soccer as a stupid ideal post wildcard.

sae is a normal guy outside of soccer. he even says that one of his major flaws is that he's pretty clueless about everything other than soccer. his least favorite food is fries, not because he hates the taste but because he can't have them because of his nutrition restrictions. his 'fetish' is ass because he thinks it can show what kind of an athlete someone is. all somewhat silly and ultimately regular things

all that being said - i don't think sae is a shallow person. i think he thinks very deeply and logically about a lot of things and he is indefinitely arrogant, but not shallow which is why i think it wouldn't make sense for him to judge on appearance. it'd be more accurate to assume that he's sort of dense and doesn't pay attention to people who aren't in his immediate circle. the assumption that he would make judgements on your appearance if you're just a regular joe-schmo doesn't quite connect to me. he's not insecure enough to do that.

on the issue of commitment - my only opinion is that sae is a character who values independence of sense of individualism in his partners. anyone with a strong sense of self is someone he is drawn to. this is why he likes isagi and shidou and often reprimands rin because he lacks a sense of selfhood and self confidence. rin only realizes that post the u20 match.

my point being that i think sae can and will commit to somebody but there's a lot more factors for a character like him that others like isagi or chigiri or kunigami who are naturally emotionally in tune with you.

sae isn't and will never be a 'romantic' person in the traditional sense to me but i don't think it means he's incapable of love or commitment. he has a hard time communicating verbally and saying things to your face but he remembers everything you said from your last conversation and pay attention to your hobbies. if you argue, you'll always find a vase of flowers in your kitchen with a note but you always have to call first. he's not Good about the emotional aspect because even if he puts in a lot of effort - it's never going to come naturally to him

BUT that also means if you're able to meet him half-way he's a committed and decent lover to you. he tries really hard to be and it takes some patience because he's sometimes too logical and hurts your feelings but he's there where it matters etc.

this is an essay SORRY KFDHJKSD. ive spent a lot of time thinking about him and giving him depth. and im not defending him necessarily because he is a massive douchebag for a lot of your early relationship. just not for shallow or petty reasons. simply bad at coping with his emotions and expressing himself because he's very prideful

[anonauthorsworkshop]

Omg!! The new chapter is so cool. I think the way you present Joe Schmo is so unique. Like imagine being viewed as somebody else for so long and nobody can see the real you, your actions don't matter even if you use extreme methods, they just lock you down in a cell and labble you as an anomaly and you stuck being in a cell and frustrated because no one can hear your true thoughts anyway.

Then one day somebody can hear what you are saying clearly without your 'ability' to filter it and I think at that moment Joe Schmo felt such strong emotions that he didn't even react when MC ran out the room(correct me if i'm wrong plz). He definitely had a thousand thoughts running through his head or just simply felt immensly relieved/happy maybe grateful because finally someone can see him as his true person.

The interaction between MC and 999 is so adorable. 999 maybe afraid of MC at first but they warm up in the end and want to stick with MC 0w0 like glue . IT'S SO FREAKING CUTEEEE. Oh not to mention 079 is such a good friend to worry about MC well-being after seeing MC disappeared. And the last line he said to MC means he's looking forward to seeing MC in following interviews (he feels comfortable to spend time with MC maybe without relization but he still want to hang outwith MC more, you're doing great as a friend buddy XD !)

In the next chapter, maybe we'll see more of scp 049. I imagine him just sitting in his room and doing his research. Then, the staff announces that he will have a meeting with MC because of their 'interaction' in the third chapter. I think he would be hesitated at first (he seems to be uncomfortable as he recalls MC gaze) but since foundation just want to conduct a meeting anyway, so they meet up with 049 being silent and maybe figdgeting a bit when MC looks at him. And MC just feels the air is kinda awkward and attempts to start a conversation. They talk for some time and MC may say things that confuses 049 but they vibe anyways but 049 is not that much relaxed completely. Then, MC wants to show that they are friendly and polite, they hold out their hand to shake (for the moment they forgot about 049's deadly touch). And 049 notices this and is taken by surprised to see somebody actually wants to shake his hand, he stares at MC for a little bit and eventually gives in and holds MC hand (because he wants social interaction too even if it goes wrong in the end :'3) And MC shakes his hand gently and 049 feels like his mind has gone blank and he just stares blankly at his hand and looks up to MC. His mind is like : I finally found the cure to the Pestilence ! and I can actually hold their hand as a normal person !). It's so sudden that he doesn't know how to comprehend and when he comes back to his senses. He realizes he is back to his cell and feels disappointed because he cannot talk with MC more to ask about the Pestilence or simply wants to hold their hand a little longer. He will request for more interactions in the future eventually. MC after the meeting thinks that 049 is cool and they sit on the bed and the relization just hits in their face : Waitttt did i just shake hands with 049- . And they know that the foundation has already recorded this and now know that they are immune to 049's touch :))).

That's all for my long rant :33. Thank you for reading this <3. I hope you are doing well and have a great weekend. I'm really looking forward to new chapters !!!

thank you so much!!! this makes my day seriously omg 😭😭 ily thank you for your kindness

[fuckyeahvanhalen86-95]

In 2009, former Van Halen members Sammy Hagar and Michael Anthony reunited for a brand new band, Chickenfoot, also featuring Red Hot Chili Peppers drummer Chad Smith and guitarist Joe Satriani. As the band explained to Classic Rock that year, they were ready to bring back the party vibes with their self-titled debut album.

“I’m jazzed to be playing with these guys. I’ve recorded an album with Andy Johns, who’s produced my favourite ever bands. I’m playing with guitar god Joe Satriani and Hall Of Famers Mike Anthony and Sammy Hagar. And I’m just a schmo from Detroit who makes a racket.”

The ‘schmo’ in question is none other than Red Hot Chili Peppers drummer Chad Smith who makes up one quarter (or should that be a drumstick?) of Chickenfoot, the supergroup du jour who are already creating a lot of excitement with the announcement of an album in April and a European tour this summer.

With so much promise and such a stellar cast, do they actually live up to the hype? The name doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue with ease or conjure up visions of a union between some of rock’s mightiest behemoths.

“Chickenfoot was just supposed to be a bullshit name that we used for a while,” reveals former Van Halen bassist Michael Anthony. “And then rumours spread about the band and we thought, fuck it. Let’s just call it Chickenfoot. It all comes down to the music anyway.”

“That’s right,” concurs Will Ferrell lookalike Smith. “And let’s get one thing straight: we’re not a supergroup.We like hanging out together, and the music is a bonus. We just happen to be in other groups.”

CR caught up with the band ‘hanging out together’ at Sammy Hagar’s recording studio (which seems to double up as a garage for his vast collection of vintage sports cars) located on an anonymous industrial estate just outside San Francisco. While Hagar, Anthony and Satriani live close by, Smith has flown in from LA and is a day late, having very recently become a father.

“You were fired yesterday,” jokes Satriani.

“You can just take a walk around the block and get fired from this band!” Smith complains.

“We should exclusively play the Chad Smith catalogue!” retorts Satriani.

Smith: “I was going to bring that up. Question: Why did the drummer get sacked from the band? Answer: He said: ‘Hey, guys, I’ve got a few songs I want to try out.”

This is kind of banter carries on relentlessly throughout the day as the band members flit in and out of photo shoots and management conferences while CR tries to collar them. Which is what you’d expect from a collective with such high-profile party animal credentials; even the usually more introspective Satriani has been seized by the levity of the occasion.

“Make sure you run this by Gene Simmons,” he tells his manager when he’s given a copy of Chickenfoot’s new logo. “Remember: Kiss own everything.”

Chickenfoot’s origins came about when Hagar left Van Halen for the last time in 2005 and formed his own band The Waboritas, whose shows featured a segment where Hagar and Anthony would play under the guise of The Other Half (as in the other half of VH) featuring special guests. This eventually developed into regular jam sessions at Hagar’s Cabo Wabo club in Mexico, where Smith owns a holiday home.

“Sammy invited me to play at the club on New Year’s Eve,” the drummer explained. “I told him that I didn’t know much Van Halen but I knew and loved the first Montrose album. He said: ‘Great! We’ll do the whole album!’”

Instantly bonded by their love of classic rock music (Smith is also a huge fan of this esteemed magazine) and besieged by requests from fans wanting to know when the band were going to tour and record, Hagar decided that if they were going to take this venture seriously then they would have to expand the line-up.

“I can just about carry off playing guitar in a jam band scenario,” the frontman and tequila entrepreneur explains, “but to do it properly we needed a guitarist. And as far as I’m concerned Joe Satriani is the best guitar player in the world.”

The band made their official debut just over a year ago in Las Vegas at a Hagar concert, where they played a short set of covers (including Led Zeppelin’s Rock And Roll and Traffic’s Dear Mr. Fantasy).

Satriani had played with Hagar in a project called Planet US in 2003, and when the two men got together in the studio there was an immediate rapport. “We wrote eight songs in two days,” Hagar recalls. “And then when we all got together and wrote more songs it turned into a band.”

They hired producer Andy Johns (whose illustrious CV includes Led Zeppelin, The Rolling Stones, Free and Jimi Hendrix) for the album, but he got seriously ill halfway through recording process and Mike Fraser (AC/DC, Metallica, Aerosmith) took over. The final result is as confident, energetic and musical as one would expect from such an elite corps of players. And you won’t be surprised to learn that Hagar agrees.

“This is the best record I’ve ever done in my life,” he enthuses. “I feel like everything I did – working in Montrose, Van Halen and then going solo – happened so I could be who I am right now with this band.”

We’re given an exclusive preview of three tracks from the band’s self-titled debut. Soap On A Rope and Sexy Little Thing have the humour and loose, spontaneous feel of prime VH, with the unashamed unbridled energy of Montrose. Avenida Revolucion is an epic anthem about a dividing road on the Mexican/American border – a contentious subject close to Hagar’s heart.

“That’s a very political song. But I live on the Californian border and in Mexico as well, and I’m telling you, it’s a problem. You drive down Avenida Revolucion: for miles and miles it’s wall-to-wall flowers, crosses and messages for people who’ve been killed. It’s a mess.”

So fired up with this new project, Hagar has already managed to stir some controversy when during an interview in Toronto he reportedly said that Chickenfoot could – ahem – rival Led Zeppelin. The very mention of this makes him groan loudly and bury his face in his hands: “I’m backing off that statement right now, it was the stupidest thing I ever said,” he admits, and then explains what actually happened.

“As you know, I own a tequila company. And I was spreading the word in Canada. I got real fucked up, and then this guy brings up Chickenfoot. I said: ‘We’re better than Zeppelin,’ or something. What I was trying to say is that this band is like early Zeppelin – it’s got a hard-rock edge to it that’s special. I would never compare anything to Led Zeppelin, they were the greatest band ever.”

In the meantime the band aretalking to record labels and putting together a tour of Europe’s festivals this summer which will include some shows in the UK. This will mark a long-overdue return for Anthony and Hagar. “I feel so guilty I haven’t played there in years,” Hagar confesses. “When I was in Van Halen we’d do 130 dates in the US, and the management would say: ‘Are you ready to do Europe?’ And we’d say: ‘Fuck you. We’re done.’ And when we finally got there we thought we were the biggest band in the world and we ended up supporting Bon Jovi. That broke the band up.”

So, Chickenfoot: musical saviours, or a bunch of old rockers indulging in a mid-life-crisis vanity project? Hagar firmly believes it’s the former, and that the age card works to their advantage.

“I agree it’s hard for old bands to get together and write new material,” he admits. “When I was in Van Halen at the 2004 reunion, I wanted to do a new album but we couldn’t, because we were past it. But I think if you still have it in your heart and mean it, then the more seasoning you have, the better you get. Let’s face it: are you going to pay the same price for some band you’ve never heard of as you would to see the Stones or Zeppelin?”

Originally published in Classic Rock 132

[brookheimer]

watching the joe schmo show for an article i’m writing about reality tv hoaxes and gotta say. one of the talent shows ever

[advicefromschmo]

I'm tumblr's very own bartender.

I got all night to talk. You need to vent? You wanna show me something? Want some advice? Maybe you just need a friend?

Shoot me an ask. Anon is on. DM me. I won't spread your drama.

This is a judgement free zone. Sexism, racism, transphobia, homophobia, ableism, antisemitism, etc. will not be tolerated here.

Disclaimer: I am not a professional. I'm just some joe schmo. My advice should be taken with a grain of salt. Everything I have to say is from my own life experiences.

[xmcu-fietro]

a collection of facts I’ve learned while researching for a sentence at most in my X-Men fanfic writing, ranging from pretty normal to weird and/or concerning:

- nail extensions as we know them were invented in the 1950s when a dentist broke a nail and used dental acrylic to fix it. An earlier version of fake nails was when women in 19th century Greece used pistachio shells as fake nails. (X)

- Dennis Wilson from The Beach Boys (and brother of Brian Wilson) lived with Charles Manson at one point. Dennis got divorced from his wife and then met a few girls who were like “we want to introduce you to our guru Charlie” and then it ended up being Charles Manson with a ton of LSD. It wasn’t until later when Dennis stopped being friends with him and he got arrested that Dennis realized it was a cult. (Source: his Wikipedia)

- post-punk and goth music were invented in the 70s, and the predecessor to those styles was pre-pre-punk. 

- Waffle House, the American breakfast chain, has its own music label with songs about the food it serves (x)

- there was a reality show in the early 2000s called The Joe Schmo Show where actors (including a pre-SNL Kristen Wiig) were hired to be friends with a guy named Matt (unbeknownst to him), somewhat like The Truman Show. (x)

[absolxguardian]

I really want a star wars book or comic to offhandedly use the name "glup shitto" where we would say "John doe" or "Joe schmo". But specifically only those two mediums. Because if it was in a movie or TV show, it would be because Disney wanted to get viral marketing for canonizing a meme. If it was in a lesser known medium, it would be because the author was One of Us.

[youknowwobbles]

Sad I couldn't never be in a Joe Schmo Show situation because I recognize too many improv comedians