#the last time i hated a ship so much was in 2014 when ppl wanted sherlock holmes and molly hooper to be thing

[drwcn]

tbh I don't know wtf is happening on wheel of time half the time but everyone slays in their costumes.

[peachywander]

All asks

Holy shit, this will be so much fun B-) *cracks knuckles*

Ask me: FANDOM EDITION

A - Your current OTP

Uhhh pff,,, skeleton dance I think?? I mean sure, skelley dance is always my current OTP, ngl. They're basically made for eachother, hell, even craig himself wore tshirts and stuff with wander hugging hater ifthisisn'tcannonthenidkwhatitis

B - A pairing you initially didn’t consider but someone changed your mind

To be honest,, wander x beza. I used to dislike every wander x girl ship bcs I see him as gae and nothing else. But I have a friend who does lots of art with them so I think it grew on me more and more with time?? Now I think they would look cute together, even if i'm still not super big on it.

C - A pairing you have never liked and probably never will

Wnder x domi. No comment, I despise it with all my heart 😂😂 Like I said earlier, I don't like most of wander x girl ships, and domi really hates wander. Sooo this ship simply doesn't make sense to me,, lmfao.

D - A pairing you wish you liked but just can’t

I think Twi x Flash from mlp. Yeah, I thought twi was cute when crushing on him in the 1st EG movie but they don't seem to have that chemistry I was hoping for. Plus I haven't seen any recent episodes of mlp in a long time, though I heard ppl say that he was mean to her once, if I remember well? Anyways, doesn't work so much for me.

E - Have you added anything stupid/cracky/hilarious to your fandom, if so, what

Besides memes/ shitposts, not really. Check @gunxball if you want to see posts of mine back when I was into gumball 2 yrs ago (golly i miss those times)

F - What’s the longest you’ve ever been in a fandom

Probably su (2016-2019) or kid vs kat (2011-2014)

G - Do you remember your first OTP, if so who was in it

Why yes, of course I do. cosmo x wanda from fop. They were so adorbs together esp in the first 2 seasons. Don't like how they got so flanderized with time, their dynamic was absolutely destroyed, and my day was ruined when I found out.

H - Do you prefer characters from real action series or anime series

I don't watch either lolol

But I think anime.

I - Has tumblr caused you to stop liking any fandoms, if so, which and why

Dislike the fandom, not the show itself? Probably hzbin hotel. The show has a pretty neat concept and animation and it had such a big impact on my artstyle when I first watched it. But the fandom? Absolute hell. (pun intended)

From shipping wars, to pestering vivz, anything is possible. Glad I haven't actually interacted with that part of the fandom.

J - Name a fandom you didn’t care/think about until you saw it all over tumblr

Not a show but among us. Back in september/october last year, my tl was FILLED with among us, up and down. Made me a lil tired of it but once I tried playing that game, I couldn't stop. Also the owlhouse, fell in love with the artstyle and story.

K - How do you feel about the other people in your current fandom

I don't have a current fandom. Not feeling in the mood + school + inactivity bcs of school. So I'll say abt my latest fandom, which was animaney. Well, people were really nice, and they seemed to enjoy the reboot. Nothing more to say tbh,,

L - Your favorite fanartist/author gives you one request, what do you ask for

Ummm I don't really like giving rqs to my fave artists, i don't wanna bother them haha

M - Your favorite fanart or fanartist

I don't know aaaa, prolly toonipi but she also draws ocs, not just fanart.

N - Your favorite fanfiction or fanauthor

Anything cute or sappy with skelleydance (NO nsfw)

O - Choose a song at random, which OTP does it remind you of

Lasers and feelings. Skellydance again. It matches sO well-

P - Invent a random AU for any fandom (we always need more ideas)

I used to have a skatepark AU ft. su chars but never put anything over here. I still have the sketches from 9th grade lmao.

Q - A ship you’ve abandoned and why

To be completely honest, Amydot. Up until s3 they really gave me possible ship vibes. They interacted a lot, and peri discovered her metal powers thanks to amy. But after s3 they hardly ever interacted anymore (besides that one ep from s5 with the kindergarden). I was so dissapointed, but hey lapdot isn't so bad anyway, right?

R - A pairing you ship that you don’t think anyone else ships

Back in 2014 I would have said chred from angry birds, definitely. Not many really shipped them, and when I saw some fanart of them on dA everyone would say "ew, gae". Well, 2014 everyone. I was always like "so?? i like that ship, what's the problem??"

S - Show us an example of your personal headcanon

Uhmm, i headcanon darwin from tawog that he likes to yodel lol

T - If you mostly have homoships, do you have any heteroships

I think my ships are 50-50, but here are some examples:

Larsdie

Stevnnie

Blckeye

Fluttrcord

Beeckard

Starc0

Tanyamao

Foxodile

Pennball

Carwin

U - If you mostly have heteroships, do you have any homoships

Same as T. Another examples:

Skelleydance

Wnderingeye

Sylava

Lumty

Rupphre

Pearlmthyst

Badgrmao

Bubbline

Flutterdsh

Patbob

V - Are you one of those fans who can’t watch anything without shipping

Lol no. Tbh, i'm not super big on shipping either. I only slighty like/dislike any ship i listed earlier (with the exception of skelleydance, i'm too in love with that ship)

W - 5 favorite characters from 5 different fandoms

wakko warner (animaney)

wander (woy)

fluttershy (mlp)

amethyst (su)

bubbles (ppg)

X - 3 OTPs from 3 different fandoms

skelleydance (woy)

lumty (toh)

stevnnie (su)

Y - A fandom you’re in but have no ships from

kid cosmic (or maybe I do ship papa g w/ chuck), animaney, okko, gravity flls

Z - Just ramble about something fan-related, go go go

That one fan made episode from su called the smothering, it was so freaking amazing. It helped a lot in relieveing the pain of that big hiatus from 2017 (which was the biggest one, i literally turned into a skeleton waiting for new eps). Loved peri's needy personality, as well as lappy's playful one. It was so well written, like it could be perfectly fit as a role reversal episode in the main show.

[redxblueihateloveyou]

Have you seen the video of JoJo Talks To Much about RH and MH? If not, it's a good video

Yes, saw it, I agree with some stuff and at the same time I disagree with lots of it, too. I personally felt like he was kinda, well... trying to soften the blow for Makoto fans at some moments, just so they wouldn’t be mad at him?

But hey, I’m always happy to have people on our side, who speak up, with different points of view, cause I think many ppl are kinda scared of potential attack since it happened before and nobody talks that much, but I suggest to talk more, cause I think the last movie kinda shows that the creators are actually listening to the fans (I mean, they NEVER redraw the WHOLE fucking scene in recap movies!!!!!!!!!! and make it gay), so vote, spread the love about rinharu, post more, voice your opinions, don’t be scared, you will find that lots of people think the same. It’s 2020, not 2014 and most people probably grew up and would watch on things differently now. Make Rin & Haru outvote other characters not by 100 votes, but by 1000.

It’s just most of MH fans honestly don’t even know what’s happening in canon now, they just live in a vague pics of what they saw once in 2013, that wasn’t even there. Not to mention that Makoto cult kinda died last year after his character went to a trash can. I talk to people on youtube, too, under my RH vids, and I saw that most ppl don’t even remember things correctly.

And tbh when you have solid points, like no hating, but like genuine arguments, it’s gets much more fun interracting with people in the fandom. And converting people to your ship just cause you love it so much is so nice. I’ve had so many ppl telling me like “bitch, you got me addicted, too” lol

So yeah, post, write, draw, if you can, please. I mean, I was so happy when people asked to translate my Rinharu tumblr babbling in chinese, you have no idea. I mean, it’s so freaking cool. So spread Rinharu love everywhere. Same as with the last movie, it matters, and definitely affects stuff. There were actual situations, when fans made creators make some ship canon, I’ve seen it on tv. I of course don’t think it can happen here, but you definitely might get smth close. So want more Rinharu, spread the love <3

And don’t be afraid to argue, I mean, pls never go too far and offend ppl, but healthy arguing is always great in my opinion.

P.S. Btw here, in Russia there are only Rinharu fans, idk how it happened, but never saw a MH one xD

[clownsnake]

ok so my tl is all hussie hate please tell me what this man has done (so i can bully him as well)

Off the top of my head, he’s had a repeated habit of getting into controversies, what with:

-team special olympics. idk much to do with that but ppl have said tht it’s shitty and with that info + just judging by the name, I Do Not want to look it up. Idk if he apologized for it, i don’t care. if anyone wants to provide more info on this issue go ahead!

-saying that the homestuck kids are ‘aracial’ (already controversial & not a creative decision I agree with outside of podcasts & non-graphic novels) but then making the trickstermode versions of them ‘caucasian’ (idk if he made a great apology for that, but I think many POC fans were still upset even after his apology. Look it up & judge for urself wether he got to the heart of the issue)

-the epilogues. He made jane into a trump allegory, instead of just making Jade trans for the whole yiffany plot point he GAVE HER A DOG DICK, hired an incest shipper for the album art(? I think? I know there was an artist involved who ships prospitcest, I just dk if it was for album art or w/e) as well as someone who wrote bro/dave fics, general character bastardization upsetting a lot of people, and hired (in my opinion) very pretentious writers. Generally a dick move, aside from the morally fucked shit.

-hs2, continuing off of the dick move of the epilogues with yiffany! Minimal rosemary post-that flower shit (which is... you know, the biggest piece of lgbt rep in hs. This is just something tht irks Me, so if u don’t want to count that against him go ahead), more pretentiousness, and other shit I’m too lazy to bring up rn. There’s some dirt on some of the writers being shit (like Kate “im gonna post nudes on twitter where kids can easily find them, and scream about how much I hate children when I get called out for it” Mitchel, and optimistic “i said that anyone who disagrees with Kate should die” duelist), and their behavior doesn’t really dictate how I view hussie ASIDE FROM 1. The fact that HE hired them and 2. The fact that he’s Friendly with them. He willingly chose to associate with them by putting them in charge of his most successful work.

-skaianet controversy.. idk what the whole bs with that is, I didn’t read it, but apparently he made hitler related to the human cast of homestuck?? And aside from that it was just generally very insensitive? Like I said I didn’t read it, it wasn’t rlly worth my time, so if anyone wants 2 correct me go ahead. He retconned it & apologized for it so that was cool. Still fucked up tht he did that tho.

-the odd gentleman controversy. The story for a while has been that TOG stole hiveswap’s Kickstarter money for some other game, but recent allegation have been that 1. Hussie got TOG to make art for one of homestuck’s animations while they were being hired to work on hiveswap, thus wasting their time 2. TOG worked on a side gig, kings quest, while hussie wanted them 2 make art for him. TOG’s time was allegedly being wasted, so I allegedly back this decision. & 3. Hussie was apparently prone to last-minute decisions, like the 3D to 2D switch in hiveswap style. According to TOG’ claims, the 3D version of hiveswap act 1 was complete in 2014 and work on act 2 had already begun, when hussie suddenly decided hey! Let’s redo all this shit & make it 2D! It fits my ~artistic vision~ more. :) Again, we don’t know if TOG’s claims are true or if the claims of TOG stealing the Kickstarter money are true, but if TOG’s claims are true,,,,,, then hussie wasted their time And a million twelve year olds’ money that was given to the Kickstarter. I’m willing to bet that their claims are true, bc the timeline matches up with what we know, and this all seems.... very in-character for hussie. (Also idk TOG’ pronouns, rip. Someone plz let me know this info I don’t want 2 misgender anyone)

Wether or not you want to hold him accountable for any of this stuff, you gotta recognize the fact that he has made a habit of being a douche. I don’t trust him to avoid getting in controversies like this in the future, and I don’t trust him to make good decisions about homestuck from now on. The tone of the epilogues very much seems like it’s author fucking hates his creation & his characters, and if his burnout-fueled spite keeps on going the way it’s going, he’s gonna make more decisions just to piss of fans.

Tl;dr: hussie has repeatedly gotten into controversies, some of which aren’t properly apologized for, and I don’t trust tht he won’t do shit like this again. He just has bad vibes.

If anyone wants to correct me on anything, or add onto this go ahead! I’m in a rush rn so I can’t look things up 2 confirm stuff atm, I gotta get 2 class,, for more info I recommend checking out abraxas-calibrator’s blog! I learned a lot from searching thru there. (Also my memory is shit, so I probably definitely mixed some things up)

[codenamesailordarillium]

I just stumbled across your tumblr & saw the thing where you said you don’t mind random asks, so I hope this ones ok: I got into DW over the past year & am now hardcore RiverDoctor. Unfortunately it seems like I’ve arrived to the party about 10 years late. Which means I stumbled across the section of the fandom that hates on THoRS bc 12 wasn’t “River’s Doctor” & 11 didn’t get to take her to Darillium for the first time today... Would you have any thoughts on that whole thing?

Wow…well, first I wanna say it’s always great to have new people on board. I know it might seem like you’ve gotten into it too late in the game, but trust me, new people in our corner in the fandom are always welcome (as with any fandom, of course). Feel free to send asks gushing about it to people, I’m sure fellow shippers would be happy to welcome you with open arms. ^_^

As for the rest well…this is gonna get long and probably have the potential to piss certain ppl off bc I have Opinions™, so gonna put the rest of this under a cut.

Hoo boy…yeah, 11/River *ONLY* shippers. See, the thing was, initially, back in late 2013/early 2014, when we were fresh off of Matt’s regeneration ep and all, I could sympathize to a certain degree with ppl who were sad about him leaving and were reluctant to see River/Alex with 12/Peter because it wouldn’t be the same or whatever. I didn’t agree personally (tho initially I was p bummed about Matt leaving, Peter started winning me over real quick not long after he was announced), but I understood that people have a certain attachment to characters and specific dynamics shippy or otherwise. 

But to me, River was always the priority when regarding my interest in DW, and I wanted to see more of her in the show again, regardless of which Doctor it was with. I didn’t like how abruptly Moffat decided to end her story, just because the majority of the big reveals unfolded with Matt as the Doctor and suddenly because he and Karen and Arthur weren’t gonna be on the show anymore it meant Alex had to go as well. That didn’t really seem fair to River as a character, ‘cause it felt like we’d only been shown the bare bones of her story, her background/origin, her getting married to the Doctor, and then her dying. It didn’t feel right for her to just…not be there all of a sudden. Certain episodes (and lbr character dynamics) during series 8 and 9 would have probably benefited from her presence (off the top of my head I’d say Time Heist, how the hell did this show have a heist episode with no River using her time-traveling archaeologist sleuthing skills, like dafuq).

So…pre-THoRS, the Doctor/River fandom after Peter took over the role was a bit of a mixed bag. There were the people who only wanted River with 11 and just angsting in general because there wasn’t gonna be any more of that, but there also was a significant bunch of us who were DEEP into wanting River & 12 to happen. People were still in the fandom, writing fic, drawing fanart, what have you, probably at a slower rate than they had previously, but there was still stuff being put out there, simply because we wanted to entertain what that hot Capalston Sex Storm chemistry might look like. So when news of THoRS suddenly hit us in the face like…

…needless to say, a good number of us were suddenly stoked, new life had been breathed into the fandom and there was pretty much constant excited yelling for like the three and a half-ish months after it was announced. Once the episode finally came out and Darillium got switched from that big dreadful moment where River’s story turned tragic (well, even more tragic than it already was) to literally the most warm and fuzzy soft 24 years of domestic marital bliss for River, there were diverging opinions.

Post-TNotD the fandom had come up with all these headcanons about 11 having lost River directly after losing the Ponds, which was why he was up on that cloud for a century and the generally accepted consensus was that Darillium had to have happened with 11. Admittedly, it doesn’t really paint 11 in the best light after the fact that he seemed to have tried dying on Trenzalore without ever having taken River to Darillium like he’d promised. But, looking back, a lot of 11 & River’s relationship as it was depicted in series 5 & 6 was fraught with emotional hurt on River’s end, so for me personally (and some others), it didn’t really seem entirely out of character for 11 once we really started thinking about it. 

Really, it’s more complicated because of the nature of TV and how with a show like DW it’s really impossible to plan out these big story beats ahead of time with different Doctors. Moffat initially tried getting David to stay an extra season after RTD left, and had David said yes, that means a good chunk of River’s story would have unfolded with 10. It kinda just ends up being a case of who’s currently part of the cast and how can we mold this particular part of the story around them. By the time Steven decided on the way in which he wanted to show Darillium unfold, Matt was already gone, so it had to happen with Peter.

(And I mean, if you wanted to put a positive spin on it, you could see it as 11′s big blustery last-ditch attempt at trying to prevent River dying in the Library from happening.)

I was admittedly a vocal cuntface about how much I DIDN’T want THoRS to end on Darillium before “24 years”. I hated the idea of 12 finally seeing and being with his wife only for it to end all unnecessarily angsty again. Moffat managed to completely upend and rewrite my expectations in that regard, fortunately. 

For a lot of us, it was about River being shown to finally have some no-strings-tied happiness with a Doctor who knew her. I think a lot of people wanted that to be with older!11, but narrative-wise, I think regardless of whether it’s older!11 or 12, the point is the Doctor being at a point where he can be the husband who River needs. One whose memories don’t need to wiped after the fact like all the classic Doctors, War, 9, or pre-Library 10. Aside from the whole HELL YEAH SPACE WIVES angle, I think that’s also what fuels a lot of the desire for River to be with 13 as well, a Doctor who knows and loves her regardless of what face their wearing.

For some ppl in this fandom tho, that didn’t suffice because it didn’t happen with Matt & Alex. And I mean, if that’s how someone feels, that’s their prerogative, but I don’t see any reason to rain on everyone else’s parade when it literally brought new life and excitement and joy and FUN into our fandom after what felt like quite a long dry spell without any River content. 

And I mean, not to get mopey and sad about it (trigger warning for some potentially upsetting stuff), but the news about River being back on DW in September of 2015 couldn’t have come at a better time fore me personally, bc that was literally a time in my life where I had sudden and overwhelming/dangerous mental health issues, to the point where daily I contemplated suicide and knowing that River was finally gonna meet the Scottish version of her husband was quite literally the thing that kept me alive, because I fucking HAD to see it. So, I do tend to bristle when I come across opinions that trash that particular episode, because it means a HELL of a lot to me. 

The only thing I can say about dealing with people who stew in negativity is to just try to avoid them. I don’t follow anyone who professes THoRS-negative opinions and in some very rare cases I’ve blocked certain people. In addition to this, bc Tumblr’s blocking system is balls, I use the xkit blacklist extension and literally put people’s urls into it so I don’t have to see their stuff when others unknowingly put it on my dash. (Tho be aware that if ppl change their urls you might need to go in and change it to their current one, but it’s not that hard to do.) Because at the end of the day, you just want to be able to enjoy the ship. You are the one curating your own fandom experience, and once you know what you want to avoid (or who), you gotta just take the necessary precautions.

[brianna-lei]

Butterfly Soup Asks #16

This time including the squad as DnD characters, Liz facts, Noelle getting her yaoi education, and more

I’ve only played Dungeons & Dragons once (1) in my life so I’m no expert! I’d consider my thoughts suggestions (like with my takes on the charaters’ MBTI types, which I’m not an expert of either): 

Noelle as a Wizard sounds right, since she definitely can’t do anything reliant on physical strength. She would be an asshole and attempt things like building a Clone Army

AKARSHA THE BARD. Rogue sounds too cool for her

Diya: I actually want to say she’s a Ranger because the Wiki on 5th edition says “The Beast Master archetype forges a connection between civilization and beasts, allowing the character to interact with animals in certain ways including gaining an animal companion to control.“ Fighter and Knight also sound plausible though! 

Min: Barbarian with high Strength and no Intelligence and Wisdom

I don’t want to say too much because I want to save things for the sequel, but here’s some stuff:

She actually played against Diya in youth leagues before she transitioned. That’s why she recognizes Diya+specifically approached her to sign the baseball club form while Diya doesn’t recognize her. At the first club meeting Liz tells her “I was at one of your games when you were little” -- This is purposefully ambiguous/misleading (sounds like Liz was just watching) because she passes and doesn’t want to out herself to a bunch of club members she doesn’t know well

After transitioning she quit baseball and switched to softball. It was weird being the one trans girl on a team of cis dudes, and additionally when she was younger she sort of felt like she had to prove she was a girl; she naturally has feminine taste, but she’d overperform it by 25%. It wasn’t until she got close to Chryssa and found out she also liked baseball that she reclaimed her interest in it

She has a nice resting face so strangers tend to ask her for directions 

Sunburns easily

Yesss check the FAQ guys! Fangames are fine as long as you explicitly say it’s a fangame!! 

I’m almost mad I didn’t think of this myself. I’m one of those people who overuses “spoopy” 

All art in the game (including the title screen) can be downloaded here!

NO!!! 

Noelle. The day the others find out will be the End of her

Akarsha was reading some yaoi so it came up in conversation, and since Noelle had never heard of it Akarsha gleefully educated her (to Noelle’s horror). Noelle was extremely scandalized that Akarsha kept sending her inappropriate images, and Akarsha was like “i’m doing this out of the kindness of my heart! it’s for ur education!! me: Master Teacher. call me sensei”  

Following this Akarsha changed her chat name to YAOI SEME as seen at the beginning of the game 

Diya and Noelle: Never tried it

Min: Has tried it 

Akarsha: She constantly makes weed jokes but actually only does it rarely 

Yes, I’m planning on exploring this more in the sequel! 

Diya; Dee-ya. Rhymes with “See ya”

Min-seo: Korean way, but most characters like Diya pronounce it like Min-so, with the “Min” rhyming with “win” (not like “mean”). The “so” is one syllable (not like “see oh”)  

Akarsha: uh-KAR-sha

Noelle: No L 

I was planning on making the sprites blink! I’m still a bit sad I didn’t end up doing it

It’s supposed to be fall 2008 when they’re in high school, but I took a LOT of artistic liberties when it came to the references. For example, Akarsha makes a Durarara reference even though the anime didn’t come out until 2010, and there’s a lot of modern memes that ended up in there too...I couldn’t hold back...

The IGF trailer video is especially modern-day meme-wise -- since it broke the 4th wall, it was like, all bets are off. Don’t think too hard about it!

I wanted to put a lot of 90s and early 00s hits in the game for the nostalgia factor, like Complicated, Rock Your Body, Dilemma, etc. I think it would’ve made the experience even more surreal for players who are around my age!

I don’t own the rights to all the music so I can’t distribute it around for people to download! Here’s where you can find everything:

Thought Projection by Ketsa

Holding Your Breath by Ketsa

Thoughts of You by Ketsa

2011-13 by Ketsa

Miyauchi Yuri/110515 (miltata remix) by Miltata

Night Tourist by Miltata

Sound413_Images(short) by Miltata

Sound429_Floating Cloud (draft) by Miltata

Side by Side by Miltata

Blooming by Miltata

Romaras by Miltata

Little Circle by Miltata

Daydream by Miltata

Calling Project 2 by .que

Flame of Love by YOSHI

Valar Morghulis by Bloodgod

Overflowing by Tatsuya Kato

My Heart Will Go On - Recorder By Candlelight by Matt Mulholland

At one point Diya finds out what it means on her own. After she finds out, she uses it for the actual meaning :) (added this to the FAQ now) 

I can totally relate to all of them, but I’d say Diya! (added this to the FAQ now) 

that sounds a bit alarming

(I added this to the FAQ page now, thanks for reminding me)  I’m fine with people shipping whatever!! The only thing I can think of that’d make me uncomfortable is incest and shipping Diya and Min with male characters – other than that, go nuts

Oh noo im sorry, that must’ve been stressful! For those who don’t know, I chatted about my game for a few minutes last week with MEGA (a USC club I used to be in!). I’ve adapted them here with what I assume what the questions were: 

1. Is that your cat on your Skype icon? 

yeah it is!! it's burrito 

(people think it’s a cute name) 

LOL glad you guys approve

2. Was the game made in Renpy? What do you think of Renpy vs. Twine? 

yep! it's made in renpy! I actually started out in twine -- twine is impossible if your game is like longer than an hour and is image heavy. the engine started lagging so bad it would take 30 secs to do anything

2. Would you eat a tiny 2 inch man for $100 million?

LOL it's hard..it's a lot of money. I don't think I would

(but you could use that money to save many more lives! utilitarianism) 

it's a real dude tho! i'd feel awful for him haha it's hard when you have to physically do it LOL

3. How long did it take for you to make Butterfly Soup? 

FOREVER. I thought of it in my junior year over winter break

4. Was it for school (like an assignment)? 

nah! just on my own

(people saying that’s impressive) 

yeah!! self motivation

5. What’s your favorite part of the game? 

hmmmmM I like the "date" with min in the dream. it's so fun, with the dog park

6. Which character do you relate to the most? 

diya!! social anxiety queen, so relatable

(people comment on how she runs around when anxious) 

i really did that before my sat once, ran 2 miles at the school's track

7. Are you from the San Francisco Bay Area

yeah i'm from the bay! east bay

8. Which year did you first come up with Butterfly Soup? 

winter 2014 i think

(people trying to calculate which year was my junior year) 

i graduated a year early so junior year was also senior year

9. Are you making a sequel? 

yes!! once ihave more time. i have a lot of ideas for stuff that goes after

10. Was this a prequel to Pom Gets Wi-Fi? Or maybe spiritual successor?

this is a prequel. i dunno about spiritual successor tho, they're a bit differnt

11. Any tips on how to balance schoolwork and working on personal projects? 

hmm...i honestly sucked at this and could only work on it on breaks lol...if you can try to work it into your school projects, like some bit of it...

other than that i cant think of anything LOL it's hard

12. How did you organize yourself making such a long game? Any tips? 

it was SUPER hard to organize, i was really lost until i split it into 4 sections with each character. so if you're planning on making a game this big definitely think about forcing yourself into sections like that

the art was the most confusing to do bc of how many assets there were. i was going to say "have consistent naming conventions" but that's literally impossible LOL it'll always become inconsistent no matter how hard u try

13. What part of the game took the longest (writing? art?) 

writing, actually, despite how much i complain about art assets. it's really hard making sure the structure and themes come across correctly. like pacing is so hard. art is like #2 biggest time sink

14. How early in did you write the Akarsha/Min skateboard scene?

that came pretty late haha i put it in at last second

15. Are the characters based on real people? 

they're all inspired by combinations of ppl i know! i wouldn't say based on them, tho. for example min is like a combination of 3 friends i have, strategically arranged to play her part in the story

character design is design so u still gotta be deliberate about it

16. Who’s the other cat on the computer? (they’re referring to the cat on my desktop wallpaper) 

that one's maru! he's a famous japaense cat. he's super photogenic

(people speculating that he’s the “tube one”) 

the tube one? probably. he's famous for going into stuff

17. What was your favorite aspect of working on the game? 

definitely getting to put specific Asian-American experiences into it

i was like HAHOH i can do this and no one can stop me! it was really fun getting to do this without any creative direction from like, a studio or anything. so i could just go bonkers. i hate pitching stuff so

18. Any writing advice? 

definitely have other people beta your writing as soon as possible! they always catch stuff you missed. also this is like a cheat, make your characters really extreme. like find one aspect of yourself, and turn it up to 11 and make it into a character. that way they'll be relatable and memorable at the same time. i think most people don't make their characters extreme enough so they're all kinda samey

19. (I can’t remember what they asked me here, sorry! They were asking if a specific meme was in the game)

LMAO nah it's not. i did briefly think about it though, i will admit

20. Would you eat a Gusher the size of your hand? 

that would be pretty cool. i don't think i could eat it all at once tho...i would try to save it. like half

You’re welcome, I’m really happy to hear it helped the game feel relatable!!  

Thank you! I hope you have a good day too!!

haha I feel like my game is almost propaganda bc so many people wish they had girlfriends after playing it! the agenda...Thank you for waiting for the sequel, it makes me super happy to hear people are looking forward to it! 

You’re welcome!! I’ll do my best!!! 

You’re welcome!!!! :>

You’re welcome!!! 

same I’m really happy so many people find them relatable! you’re welcome!! 

You’re welcome!! my kids can never get enough love im very happy 

I’m glad you liked it! Thanks for the support! TT_TT

[shcsallrightnow]

RULES: tag ten followers you want to know better ! TAGGED BY: @tothedevilsshow

TAGGING: @broken-empath @destructiveempathy @starliingisms @adlerthetattler @unstableempathy @cannibaletit @ilmonstro

NAME: I have many aliases, cuz I grew up when you “weren’t supposed” to give out your first name online, lol. Most ppl call me Kendra, which is my writing/vidding pseudonym. GENDER: female STAR SIGN: Capricorn HEIGHT: 5′2 and a half. THAT EXTRA HALF INCH IS VERY IMPORTANT TO ME, MMKAY? Also, your body stretches a bit during the night (you’re apparently shorter during the day cuz gravity’s compressing your spine), so in the morning I’m 5′3″. I MEASURED MYSELF AFTER I FOUND OUT ABOUT THAT. AND I REALLY WAS 5′3″. WHAT’S YOUR MIDDLE NAME?: Ruth, after both of my grandmas. :3 PUT YOUR ITUNES ON SHUFFLE. WHAT ARE THE FIRST 6 SONGS THAT POPPED UP Eve 6 - Inside Out Bat for Lashes - Laura Bastille - Laura Palmer Memoryhouse - Bonfire OneRepublic - Don’t Look Down Lady Gaga - Poker Face *lmao I love how the first and last song on this shuffle are old af. Truthfully, I’m shocked that none of my 70s music popped up. FAVE 5EVAR.

GRAB THE BOOK NEAREST YOU AND TURN TO PAGE 23. WHAT’S LINE 17? His voice turned unsure, questioning, as though he couldn’t comprehend what I was saying. “Um...okay.” - The Impossible by Joyce Smith. (That was a really bad excerpt lol, I swear it’s much better than it sounds!) EVER HAD A POEM OR SONG WRITTEN ABOUT YOU? LoL no?? Does anyone?? I mean yeah, I guess OBVIOUSLY people have, but it’s far less common these days. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU PLAYED AIR GUITAR? It’s not like I take account of these things, so Idk? I jokingly do “dad dances” all the time. WHO IS YOUR CELEBRITY CRUSH? I honestly don’t develop crushes on celebs, so much as the characters they portray lol. And even then, it’s not really a crush? Though ppl can certainly tell who I’m into at the time since I draw them, vid them, etc. etc. So obviously, I’m all about Kacey Rohl, and to a lesser extent, Hugh Dancy. I also closely follow Caroline Dhavernas these days, though I don’t have a girl crush on her. And I enjoy Katharine Isabelle, too. ALL DA HANNILADIES. WHAT’S A SOUND YOU HATE; SOUND YOU LOVE? I hate the sound of the annoying, loud ppl over the wall of my cubicle who’re always playing golf instead of working. Yes. They have a golf set AND a basketball hoop, so I have to hear them thudding basketballs against the wall, too. I MAY SOUND LIKE A JERK, BUT I LIKE TO CONCENTRATE. As for a sound I love, Idk, I guess the sound of rain? It’s so peaceful. Unless I’m stuck outside, ofc. lol DO YOU BELIEVE IN GHOSTS? HOW ABOUT ALIENS? Not really? It’s complicated. Cuz I believe that our loved ones can contact us, but I don’t really believe in ghosts the way they’re presented in TV/movies. Idk. And I suppose there’s got to be life other than us somewhere, but I doubt it’s little green men. Honestly, I don’t feel strongly about either of these things, so I’d put myself somewhere in the middle on the belief spectrum. DO YOU DRIVE? IF SO, HAVE YOU EVER CRASHED? Yes. -_- I crashed about 2 or 3 weeks ago, actually. NOT HAVING A CAR SUCKS. I slid on the ice and flipped my car onto its side. It was a nice car that I’d JUST BOUGHT IN AUGUST, and I’m totally mad at myself, grr. But most importantly, I wasn’t hurt -- I’m very loyal to the car brand because of it!

WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? I’m presently reading The Impossible by Joyce Smith, and Phantom by Susan Kay. I haven’t finished either since I only read on my lunch break. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU SAW?  Uhh, I just watched Happy Death Day. I liked it! But as for theatres, I honestly have no idea. I barely remember these things, most especially if the movie wasn’t that great. WHAT’S THE WORST INJURY YOU’VE EVER HAD? Idk... I guess when I was wearing headgear and walking through the hallway at night, and my brother ran right into me and gave me a fat lip? My mom called me Angelina Jolie, lol. That was YEARS ago though (around middle school), but it’s the first and only time I’ve had a fat lip, so I guess that’s why it stands out to me. DO YOU HAVE ANY OBSESSIONS RIGHT NOW? Not really. I’ve been yearning for a new fandom since 2014, so if anyone knows something good, LET ME AT ‘EM. Though tbh, I only get involved in fandoms if I have a ship, cuz otherwise, there’s no real point in making stuff. Not to me, anyway. DO YOU TEND TO HOLD GRUDGES AGAINST PEOPLE WHO HAVE DONE YOU WRONG? Sure, for a while. I don’t think it’s really that easy to instantly forgive someone, unless, ofc, the offense wasn’t really that bad. I like to think I eventually let things go though, cuz forgiveness is important. It’s not healthy to keep all that rage pent up inside.

[byeoltan]

Did You Know?

that in BTS ‘봄날 (spring day)’ MV, the train station that showed taehyung waiting in the beginning is actually a real train station, iryeong station in yangju city, gyeonggi-do, albeit an abandoned one, since they only transport cargo now.

and that the music video is one helluva train ride to a place where there stood a tall tree, the place where they got together and come in terms with grief and hardships in life because the cold winter does end at some point, and spring comes. but let’s talk about that later :) lets, lets talk about the very first lines namjoon uttered so carefully, such vulnerable words

i miss you saying it like this makes me miss you even more even looking at your photos, i miss you ain’t time so heartless i..hated us the us who now can’t even look at each other’s face even once

보고 싶어/bogoshippeo means ‘i miss you’, an informal, casual tone that you can use freely to significant others, friends, families, it literally means ‘i want to see you’ but essentially, it means, ‘i miss you’, here, though, namjoon used 보고 싶다/bogoshipda, which is also an informal word, but a non-conjugated form of 보고 싶어/bogoshippeo, it holds a slightly different meaning than just ‘i miss you’ because it’s not a verb. 보고 싶다/bogoshipda for lack of better words, is an expression of longing, and carries a deeper emotion than just i miss you, kinda like a monologue (?) cos he’s not saying it to someone in particular, the expression feels a bit colder, which is ironic cos then he went on about how cold time is for making him missing someone.

this place is all winter, even in august winter comes it’s like my heart/mind races with time the lonely ‘snowpiercer’ who travelled to the south (i want to) while holding your hands, go all the way to the other side of the earth i wish i could end this winter, i wonder, friend, how much does the longing should fall like snow for spring day to come?

설국열차 is the korean title for the movie ‘snowpiercer’, also the name of the train in the movie that holds the last remnants of humanity after an attempt at climate engineering in order to stop global warming has unintentionally created a new ice age. essentially, ppl in the train thought no life can exist outside of the train, not knowing there is (a polar bear), which showed up at the end of the movie. i thought it was brilliant how namjoon referenced this movie, it’s like he’s saying no matter how hard circumstances can be, no matter how hard you think you have it, there is always hope, there is always a way out, there’s always spring after a cold cold winter, even when it seems impossible, you can have your cake and eat it

(or not ;p) 

the lyrics in this song isn’t that hard to comprehend tbh it’s quite straightforward but the way they express it is both poetry and cynicism at its best, and despite the repetitive chorus the song is atcually quick and full, leaving nothing short of amazement. 

like the tiny dust that floats/flies in the air if i’m the snow that flies in the air  i would’ve reached you a little faster 

my heart swells a little here, because they are reiterating what namjoon says about wanting to hold hands so we can end this winter together, that they want to, if only they’re with us, doesn’t it soothe your heart a little? knowing there are people out there who knows how cold life can be, and wants to get to us quickly so we could the end it together 

and when some of the members lament

the snowflakes are falling little by little bit more, they fall i miss you (i miss you) how much longer do i have to wait and how many more nights do i have to stay up, to see you? will i ever get to meet you?

the others be consoling like, well,

after we pass by the end of cold winter until spring day comes once again until the flowers blossom at that place (even when it’s cold/even when you have to wait long), for a little while, please stay please stay

but then yoongi’s part came and i sobbed a little because it’s so??

i wonder if you have changed, or if i have changed. perhaps, i’ve changed. i hate the time that’s flowing at this very moment  i guess we have changed, huh i guess everyone does that, huh yeah, okay, i hated you but even when you left, there was never a day that i’ve forgotten about you and even though i actually miss you, i’m gonna erase you now cos that’ll hurt way less than blaming you

and it doesn’t help when both seokjin and jimin go on to say

i try to blow away the cold you who is like smoke, like white smoke even when i say i’m going to erase you the truth is i still can’t let you go

 /crieS/ which is why the ending gets me because

you know it all you’re my best friend the morning will come again no matter what kind of darkness or (bad) seasons  they can’t last forever

(and) it looks like cherry blossoms are blooming (now) and this winter too, is coming to an end i miss you  if i wait just a little bit longer if i stay up just a few more nights i will come to see you i will come to take you (away)

after we pass by the end of cold winter until spring day comes once again until the flowers blossom at that place (even when it’s cold/even when you have to wait long), for a little while, please stay please stay

i want to mention here that omelas referenced in the mv as we are all prob aware of by now, tells a story of how a child was kept hidden in a secluded place in the omelas city, with horrible conditions, in exchange of happiness of the entire city. and that the same tragedy also shares with children in the movie snowpiercer itself, where they were enslaved and used as replacement parts to keep the train functioning. to put it simply, children depicted in both stories were convinced to give their life for the continuation of a way of life that was totally oppressive to their own circumstances, which is extremely radical in a way that has deep resonance for our real world, like how can you stand being together in a society that is built from abuse and discrimination, entrenched inequality, and do nothing?

and it is precisely because of this, bangtan continues to voice out their opinions as they did in previous albums, and call out the perpetrators as well as the bystanders for everyhting that has gone wrong, that could go wrong, and that is going wrong in the society, especially in the events relating to their home country south korea

let me bring you back to the music video where jimin picked up the white shoes from the winter sea

the white shoes that middle-school/high school students wear in south korea

and how he carries the shoes all through out the mv

before he brought them to a tree after they all got off the train 

and hang them

these scenes imo is very much referenced to the sewol ferry tragedy that took place in april, 2014, the incident that had resulted in more than 300 deaths, including 250 second-year high school students and their teachers from danwon high school who were on a field trip that day, and is recognized as one of the most devastating maritime disaster in decades, and it’s not just because of a sinking ferry itself but because of willfull negligence and corruption.

fyi when the ferry was sinking, the captain of the ship and a number of cabin crew made announcement for the passengers to stay where they were when they themselves chose to abandon the ship while hundreds of people were still trapped inside. and being good citizens they all remained at their cabin, where they waited for further orders, which never came 

the members of crew who stayed to help passengers were among those who died. 

and the disaster doesn’t end there. it was found out later that the ship itself was illegally modified and was carrying almost double its legal limit with inexperienced crew and a questionable relationship between the ship operators and state regulators. the investigation was also conducted behind closed doors where the families are not permitted to observe the recovery operation, these allegations as well as  the way the government lacked transparency adds more to the lengthy laundry list of grievances souht koreans have against park geun hye’s administration. there were questions raised as to where she was when it happened that morning and why wasn’t the issue addressed publicly even 7 hours afterwards.

the yellow ribbons symbolize hope and solidarity with the families victims and i think it’s genius how they incorporate this knowing very well that they can be blacklisted from the government which is ridiculous at every level. the government was highly blamed for many lives lost that day, what with the lack of safety standards in the country, the families were also mostly left out of the investigation, there’s just so many dissatisfaction ppl have over park geunhye’s administration, and that itself is an understatement. and with bangtan and bighit donating 100 million won (approximately $85,000) to the sewol ferry disaster 416 family council, they are probably blacklisted already :/ 

the pile of clothing could also be a metaphor to ppl who left this world as exhibited by french artist christian boltanski’s work entitled ‘personnes’ as part of monumenta in 2010. i quote, “These grouped clothes may represent mass graves, or corpses arrayed for identification in the school gym, but they also constitute a kind of cemetery. For the experience is just the same: that there is nobody here and yet the place is crowded. Personnes, the piece is called: people, but at the same time no one.”

which is why even though tying shoes high on a tree branch or power lines have variation in meanings for different country and culture, there is one famous belief taht i think is what is meant here; that tying shoes high on a tree branch signifies someone has died and that the shoes belong to the dead person. that the reason they are hanging, is so when the dead person’s spirit returns, it will walk that high above the ground, that much closer to heaven 

and it would’ve been fineeeee to just reference spring day like this as a remembrance to the passing of the passengers and the beautiful children because the song DOES talk about grief and hardships in life, and that no matter what kind of darkness or (bad) seasons they can’t last forever 

but then bangtan had these lines that are repeatedly voiced melancholically all throughout the chorus until the very end of the song and i just–

after we pass by the end of cold winter until spring day comes once again until the flowers blossom at that place (even when it’s cold/even when you have to wait long), for a little while, please stay please stay

it’s as if bangtan is throwing shade at the captain and his crew for being dishonorable, asking the children to stay where they were ‘until the rescue boats arrive’ when they themselves were up and about ready to get out of the ship, 

it’s just. 

when the boys say these last lines it’s as if, it’s as if the boys are saying to the children that they know it’s hard to wait, but just stay there. it’s okay to stay there, i’ll come to you instead, yeah? just you wait there till i come to you so we can end this suffering together

[butterflygalatic-blog]

Spring Day

Did You Know?

that in BTS ‘봄날 (spring day)’ MV, the train station that showed taehyung waiting in the beginning is actually a real train station, iryeong station in yangju city, gyeonggi-do, albeit an abandoned one, since they only transport cargo now.

and that the music video is one helluva train ride to a place where there stood a tall tree, the place where they got together and come in terms with grief and hardships in life because the cold winter does end at some point, and spring comes. but let’s talk about that later lets, lets talk about the very first lines namjoon uttered so carefully, such vulnerable words

i miss you saying it like this makes me miss you even more even looking at your photos, i miss you ain’t time so heartless i..hated us the us who now can’t even look at each other’s face even once

보고 싶어/bogoshippeo means ‘i miss you’, an informal, casual tone that you can use freely to significant others, friends, families, it literally means ‘i want to see you’ but essentially, it means, ‘i miss you’, here, though, namjoon used 보고 싶다/bogoshipda, which is also an informal word, but a non-conjugated form of 보고 싶어/bogoshippeo, it holds a slightly different meaning than just ‘i miss you’ because it’s not a verb. 

보고 싶다/bogoshipda for lack of better words, is an expression of longing, and carries a deeper emotion than just i miss you, kinda like a monologue (?) cos he’s not saying it to someone in particular, the expression feels a bit colder, which is ironic cos then he went on about how cold time is for making him missing someone.

this place is all winter, even in august winter comes it’s like my heart/mind races with time the lonely ‘snowpiercer’ who travelled to the south (i want to) while holding your hands, go all the way to the other side of the earth i wish i could end this winter, i wonder, friend, how much does the longing should fall like snow for spring day to come?

설국열차 is the korean title for the movie ‘snowpiercer’, also the name of the train in the movie that holds the last remnants of humanity after an attempt at climate engineering in order to stop global warming has unintentionally created a new ice age. 

essentially, people in the train thought no life can exist outside of the train, not knowing there is (a polar bear), which showed up at the end of the movie. i thought it was brilliant how namjoon referenced this movie, it’s like he’s saying no matter how hard circumstances can be, no matter how hard you think you have it, there is always hope, there is always a way out, there’s always spring after a cold cold winter, even when it seems impossible, you can have your cake and eat it

(or not ;p)

the lyrics in this song isn’t that hard to comprehend tbh it’s quite straightforward but the way they express it is both poetry and cynicism at its best, and despite the repetitive chorus the song is atcually quick and full, leaving nothing short of amazement.

like the tiny dust that floats/flies in the air if i’m the snow that flies in the air i would’ve reached you a little faster

my heart swells a little here, because they are reiterating what namjoon says about wanting to hold hands so we can end this winter together, that they want to, if only they’re with us, doesn’t it soothe your heart a little? 

knowing there are people out there who knows how cold life can be, and wants to get to us quickly so we could the end it together

and when some of the members lament

the snowflakes are falling little by little bit more, they fall i miss you (i miss you) how much longer do i have to wait and how many more nights do i have to stay up, to see you? will i ever get to meet you?

the others be consoling like, well,

after we pass by the end of cold winter until spring day comes once again until the flowers blossom at that place (even when it’s cold/even when you have to waited long), for a little while, please stay please stay

but then yoongi’s part came and i sobbed a little because it’s so??

i wonder if you have changed, or if i have changed. perhaps, i’ve changed. i hate the time that’s flowing at this very moment i guess we have changed, huh i guess everyone does that, huh yeah, okay, i hated you but even when you left, there was never a day that i’ve forgotten about you and even though i actually miss you, i’m gonna erase you now cos that’ll hurt way less than blaming you

and it doesn’t help when both seokjin and jimin go on to say

i try to blow away the cold you who is like smoke, like white smoke even when i say i’m going to erase you the truth is i still can’t let you go

/crieS/ which is why the ending gets me because

you know it all you’re my best friend the morning will come again no matter what kind of darkness or (bad) seasons they can’t last forever

(and) it looks like cherry blossoms are blooming (now) and this winter too, is coming to an end i miss you if i wait just a little bit longer if i stay up just a few more nights i will come to see you i will come to take you (away)

after we pass by the end of cold winter until spring day comes once again until the flowers blossom at that place (even when it’s cold/even when you have to waited long), for a little while, please stay please stay

i want to mention here that omelas referenced in the mv as we are all prob aware of by now, tells a story of how a child was kept hidden in a secluded place in the omelas city, with horrible conditions, in exchange of happiness of the entire city. 

and that the same tragedy also shares with children in the movie snowpiercer itself, where they were enslaved and used as replacement parts to keep the train functioning. to put it simply, children depicted in both stories were convinced to give their life for the continuation of a way of life that was totally oppressive to their own circumstances, which is extremely radical in a way that has deep resonance for our real world, like how can you stand being together in a society that is built from abuse and discrimination, entrenched inequality, and do nothing?

and it is precisely because of this, bangtan continues to voice out their opinions as they did in previous albums, and call out the perpetrators as well as the bystanders for everyhting that has gone wrong, that could go wrong, and that is going wrong in the society, especially in the events relating to their home country south korea

let me bring you back to the music video where jimin picked up the white shoes from the winter sea

the white shoes that middle-school/high school students wear in south korea

and how he carries the shoes all through out the mv

before he brought them to a tree after they all got off the train

and hang them

these scenes imo is very much referenced to the sewol ferry tragedy that took place in april, 2014, the incident that had resulted in more than 300 deaths, including 250 second-year high school students and their teachers from danwon high school who were on a field trip that day, and is recognized as one of the most devastating maritime disaster in decades, and it’s not just because of a sinking ferry itself but because of willfull negligence and corruption.

fyi when the ferry was sinking, the captain of the ship and a number of cabin crew made announcement for the passengers to stay where they were when they themselves chose to abandon the ship while hundreds of people were still trapped inside. and being good citizens they all remained at their cabin, where they waited for further orders, which never came

the members of crew who stayed to help passengers were among those who died.

and the disaster doesn’t end there. it was found out later that the ship itself was illegally modified and was carrying almost double its legal limit with inexperienced crew and a questionable relationship between the ship operators and state regulators. 

the investigation was also conducted behind closed doors where the families are not permitted to observe the recovery operation, these allegations as well as  the way the government lacked transparency adds more to the lengthy laundry list of grievances souht koreans have against park geun hye’s administration. there were questions raised as to where she was when it happened that morning and why wasn’t the issue addressed publicly even 7 hours afterwards.

the yellow ribbons symbolize hope and solidarity with the families victims and i think it’s genius how they incorporate this knowing very well that they can be blacklisted from the government which is ridiculous at every level. 

the government was highly blamed for many lives lost that day, what with the lack of safety standards in the country, the families were also mostly left out of the investigation, there’s just so many dissatisfaction ppl have over park geunhye’s administration, and that itself is an understatement. 

and with bangtan and bighit donating 100 million won (approximately $85,000) to the sewol ferry disaster 416 family council, they are probably blacklisted already

the pile of clothing could also be a metaphor to ppl who left this world as exhibited by french artist christian boltanski’s work entitled ‘personnes’ as part of monumenta in 2010. 

i quote, “These grouped clothes may represent mass graves, or corpses arrayed for identification in the school gym, but they also constitute a kind of cemetery. For the experience is just the same: that there is nobody here and yet the place is crowded. Personnes, the piece is called: people, but at the same time no one.”

which is why even though tying shoes high on a tree branch or power lines have variation in meanings for different country and culture, there is one famous belief taht i think is what is meant here; that tying shoes high on a tree branch signifies someone has died and that the shoes belong to the dead person. that the reason they are hanging, is so when the dead person’s spirit returns, it will walk that high above the ground, that much closer to heaven

and it would’ve been fine to just reference spring day like this as a remembrance to the passing of the passengers and the beautiful children because the song DOES talk about grief and hardships in life, and that no matter what kind of darkness or (bad) seasons they can’t last forever

but then bangtan had these lines that are repeatedly voiced melancholically all throughout the chorus until the very end of the song and i just–

after we pass by the end of cold winter until spring day comes once again until the flowers blossom at that place (even when it’s cold/even when you have to waited long), for a little while, please stay please stay

it’s as if bangtan is throwing shade at the captain and his crew for being dishonorable, asking the children to stay where they were ‘until the rescue boats arrive’ when they themselves were up and about ready to get out of the ship,

it’s just.

when the boys say these last lines it’s as if, it’s as if the boys are saying to the children that they know it’s hard to wait, but just stay there. it’s okay to stay there, i’ll come to you instead, yeah? just you wait there till i come to you so we can end this suffering together

[holdencaulflied]

a while ago (like two years!!) i was tagged in a “describe ur top 9 formative albums” and i’m supposed to be studying for psych but i’m bored so this is as good of a time as any to talk abt music i guess

these aren’t supposed to be my favorite albums altho a few of them could fit in that category as well- it’s more the albums that i grew with and that helped me define myself at various points throughout my life

don’t panic // all time low- this album bridged me from 5th to 6th grade, and also from elementary to middle school. it was the beginning of me moving past radio hits/what my parents played in the car to finding music that was solely my preference and while i look back at this phase with embarrassment now, listening to lots of punk rock probably helped me branch out and have varied taste in music like i do today. also backseat serenade still goes hard and it’s my guilty pleasure song

marry me // st.vincent- my first foray into alternative/indie music, and also to st.vincent, who still releases amazing albums to this day. but honestly this was the soundtrack to my 7th grade year, when i was moving past the fall out boy/atl/panic! at the disco stage. paris is burning is one of the first songs i remember crying about. i listened to this album so much it’s like almost sacred now like i don’t listen to it as much bc i don’t wanna ruin the opinions i have on it by finding flaws i just want it to be a defining part of my life

pure heroine // lorde- my comfort food of albums. this came out when i was in 8th grade and it perfectly encapsulated everything about growing up and being unsure of yourself yet feeling like you knew everything. i still play this album a lot because it has stayed consistently relatable and i can appreciate the lyrics so much more now. ribs, the love club, and buzzcut season are the holy trinity of lorde songs. also lorde was my first every live concert and that is smth rlly special that i will remember forever bc literally my favorite thing is experiencing music u love live. lyrics like “we’re slipping off the course we prepared” and “my heart jumps around when i’m alluded to” stuck with me SO MUCH and this whole album really raised my standards in that i began listening more to lyrics instead of just songs i thought sounded cool

modern vampires of the city // vampire weekend- 8th or 9th grade?? definitely at the beginning of high school, but super formative because this is when i really began digging deep into spotify and finding artists and music that people wouldn’t just recommend to me. i really started seeing music as more of just a hobby to smth constant. songs like unbelievers and step and obvious bicycle were stuff i would always tell ppl to listen to- especially this was before vampire weekend became super popular it felt like i had like my own little personal album. vampire weekend in general also led to my love for indie rock/pop which has consistently been my most listened to genre since 9th grade, and although i’ve definitely changed my overall music taste from vw, there’s a lot of forever good songs on this album.

transatlanticism // death cab for cutie- holy shit this album is one of the saddest things i’ve ever listened to, and that is including high violet by the national. i probably listened to this album of my own accord the first time in 9th grade because before that my dad used to play it in the car and i wouldn’t really pay attention. but then i listened to title and registration (which is one of the first songs i remember sobbing my eyes to) and was like dad holy fuck this song is incredible. and this album is so important to me because while my dad and i disagree on a lot death cab is a common love that i think just brought us closer together. its a whole ass masterpiece like expo’86 is SO SAD yet i smile every time it comes on, and most of the lyrics aren’t obscure and twisty like a lot of other bands i listen to, yet i feel like they always pack the hardest punch

bankrupt! // phoenix- this album isn’t as formative as it is an eye-opener. it was one of the first times i began to realize music could be just as political and make points just as effectively as any op-ed, sometimes even more so. i think i listened to it sometime in 10th grade, and the line “lost ur mind on a cruise ship, bartending crucial lies” made a bigger point abt capitalism and poverty than most article i’d read. also the songs are just fucking catchy and the production is pretty great. oblique city, sos in bel air, and chloroform are some of my all time favorite songs. also the transition from drakkar noir into chloroform is like incredible and i freak out every time i hear it. 

bury me at makeout creek // mitski- mitski is a force of nature in the form of guitars and words. her new album puberty 2 is amazing but i feel like this is the album that i really related to end of sophomore going into junior year. mitski is like a weird mix of straight up electric guitar and rock like remo drive and also soft-spoken indie like moses sumney and it’s great. last words of a shooting star is my favorite song off this album and the part where she is like “i’m glad my room is at least neat so when i’m gone i’ll be remembered kindly” is so!! like u don’t think abt life in terms like that but the fact that a lot of the time you’re only remembered by other’s perceptions of you is fucking sobering. 

i’m not your man // marika hackman- ok i’ve loved marika hackman ever since i heard her cover of i follow rivers by lykke li and this album!! holy shit!! it’s so versatile but also so honest and heartfelt and somehow brutally witty at parts. i listened to it probably when it first came out, which was like either end of junior year or summer before senior year and i’m definitely at a part of life where i need constant new music- like ppl are like manasa is my personal shazam bc i never can stick to one genre or artist and i can pick song recs out of thin air so the fact that i listened to this album for like three months straight is a sign of how incredibly good it is.on a more personal note i came to terms with my bisexuality around the end of junior year, and to hear marika hackman unapologetically refer to running away with girls/falling in love with girls was so relatable at the time. it still is. i love gina’s world, round we go, and violet with all my heart. yeah the lyrics are confusing and often obscure and it is often a hard album to listen to because there are virtually no catchy hooks or choruses that grab onto you but it’s incredibly written and means so much to me.

landmark // hippo campus- AND finally, the album that has been on repeat for the past few months. i’ve always loved hippo campus from the first EP they released back in like 2014, but this is the first full album that they put out and jesus christ did it deliver and give me everything i ever wanted! my two favorite songs by them (warm glow and the halocline) aren’t even on this album but it’s still so perfect! the first time i listened to it all the way through was transcendental. sun veins into way it goes is seamless and perfectly executed. and some of these songs are so so so meaningful and sad and others are just upbeat and fun but then you listen to the lyrics and it’s like oh shit wow there’s so much i didn’t catch. i love this album and this band with all my heart i’ve seen them live twice (50% of their concert funds go to planned parenthood) and it was incredible. the way jake luppen says “solipsistic overtones” in western kids is amazing. the whole of buttercup is great the first time i heard “holy hell i can tell that you hate me, dying moon keep me up keep me waiting” i died a little. way it goes i could talk about forever with lyrics like “degenerate, counter-culture crying socialist, hip-to-lazed crazed abstractionist” like oh my god the genius it took to rhyme that stuff. also the whole of poems and epitaph is amazing and makes me cry. i love this album the most 

[whatsijeithinks-blog]

This is a post about my thoughts on the recent released song of the famous kpop boygroup BTS, “Spring Day”. The song is so sad and it left me a big impression and it also didn’t helped when I just watched the MV and their stage performances.

Before I start, I just wanted to make clear that I am not an ARMY (fandom of BTS) but I am a fan and I really respect the boys :)

Do listen the music while reading this! (I made this article while listening to the song, it helps in making me put more emotions on this post).

I miss you When I say that it makes me miss you more I’m looking at your photo but I still miss you Time is so cruel I hate us Now it’s hard to even see each other’s faces

First line of the song already made me want to cry. The way RapMon sang it holds a lot of sorrow in his tone, I can definitely feel the emotion of the song.

보고 싶어 (bogoshippeo) means “i miss you” in korean but in a informal tone. Meaning that RapMon is talking to someone who is very close to him, a friend or a family. Yet the way RapMon sang used 보고 싶다 (bogoshipda) which holds a deeper emotion and longing rather than “bogoshippeo”.

This place is all winter, even in august winter comes it’s like my heart/mind races with time the lonely ‘snowpiercer’ who travelled to the south (i want to) while holding your hands, go all the way to the other side of the earth i wish i could end this winter, i wonder, friend, how much does the longing should fall like snow for spring day to come? 

I think this verse talks about on how much longer will he hold the longing in himself. Winter is known for its coldness, which is maybe a metaphor about the coldness he feels missing his friend. 

I also did a little research and bump myself into a theory from byeoltan.tumblr.com which explains that “ 설국열차 is the korean title for the movie ‘snowpiercer’, also the name of the train in the movie that holds the last remnants of humanity after an attempt at climate engineering in order to stop global warming has unintentionally created a new ice age. essentially, ppl in the train thought no life can exist outside of the train, not knowing there is (a polar bear), which showed up at the end of the movie. i thought it was brilliant how namjoon referenced this movie, it’s like he’s saying no matter how hard circumstances can be, no matter how hard you think you have it, there is always hope, there is always a way out, there’s always spring after a cold cold winter”

Like a small piece of dust that floats in the air If the flying snow is me, I could’ve reach you faster

Okay, this line made me go “woah, is the friend dead?” which also made my heart swell and like forcing my eyes to release some tears. It just shows on how he regretted himself that if only he was a bit faster, maybe he could’ve reached his friend earlier. 

The chorus goes with:

Snowflakes are falling Getting farther away I miss you (I miss you) I miss you (I miss you) How much more do I have to wait? How many more nights do I have to stay up? Until I can see you? (until I can see you?) Until I can meet you? (until I can meet you?)

Past the end of this cold winter Until the spring comes again Until the flowers bloom again Stay there a little longer Stay there

This part made me think whether the friend was gone at the end of the winter or maybe at a day in spring. Which clicked a something inside of me, it’s a little bit of relatable to the Sewol tragedy.  8:49 a.m. of April 16, 2014 (which is in the spring season), the ship made a sharp turn, turning more than 10 degrees within one second, according to the ship's Blackbox. The ship was carrying 476 passengers, as well as several trucks and container cargoes. Vast majority of the passengers--325 to be exact--were second grade students from Danwon High School, a high school in Ansan, a suburb of Seoul.  174 out of the 476 survived. Out of the 325 students of Danwon high school, only 75 survived.

Although it’s just an assumption. For what I know so far, BTS didn’t confirm whether the song it relates about the tragedy or not (since this topic is really controversial to the country and might make them blacklisted - they even kept their and the company’s 100M won donation to the sewol ferry tragedy a secret)

Did you change? or did I change? I hate even this moment that is passing I guess we changed I guess that’s how everything is

Yeah I hate you although you left There hasn’t been a day that I have forgotten you Honestly, I miss you but now I’ll erase you Because that will hurt less than resenting you

Suga’s part is where a single tear dropped from my eye (no joke) this part obviously tells that they shouldn’t keep on holding on to the feeling of longing to them and that they should just let go. It’s that bittersweet sadness feeling of “I’d rather forget you and be empty rather than remember you and be lonely” feeling. And then comes the next part where Jin and Jimin didn’t help when they sang

I’m blowing out the cold you Like smoke, like white smoke I say that I’m gonna erase you But actually, I still can’t let you go

I know how hard it feels of wanting to let someone go but you still can’t because he or she is someone so close to you and that that person also gave a big contribution to yourself’s life. 

You know it all, you’re my best friend The morning will come again No matter what kind of darkness or (bad) seasons , they can’t last forever

(and) it looks like cherry blossoms are blooming (now) and this winter too, is coming to an end i miss you if i wait just a little bit longer if i stay up just a few more nights i will come to see you i will come to take you (away)

Past the end of this cold winter Until the spring comes again Until the flowers bloom again Stay there a little longer Stay there 

Guys, this last part doesn’t really help on calming myself throughout the song. V says that it’s just not a friend that he lost but a bestfriend (cue the tears). And he’s making it sure that even any sufferings has an ending to it.

What I did notice though that they always repeat the last part (not just because it’s a chorus) but maybe because they wanted to emphasize that “stay there and wait for me and let’s end this suffering together”