#the magic system is a whole thing and so is the asa and also the great gods

[you-are-my-neverland]

Hi hello hope you're well! Could you possibly tell me more about your nano wip Pirates? 👀

yes!! i could!!

well, firstly, as you can see, i don't have a title for it...so that's why it's just called 'pirates' for now. this wip is set in a fantasy universe where the earth, sea, and sky were created from the bodies of the great gods (not as gruesome as it sounds, but i love a good sacrifice/creation by dismemberment cosmogony. thank you mythology literature class i took over the summer). magic is therefore insinuated into nature itself; some are born with the ability to access it, while some can't (i.e some people have magic, some are Just Normal).

now, these great gods each have a Heart that was/is basically their magical core. whoever possesses these Hearts will have infinite power, etc; you know, the usual. there are two Hearts considered to be hidden in the actual world, the Stone Heart and the Star Heart. the Stone Heart is split into four pieces, presumably, two of which are with the overarching religious organization of the world, the All Seas Assembly (ASA), and the other two which are lost. the Star Heart has never been seen/found, and is the end goal of one of the wip's main protagonists, arete. arete's mother was a famous pirate on the quest to find the Star Heart, which she ultimately failed at. before passing, she magically imprinted a map onto arete's skin that would lead her to the Star Heart.

arete is ten when her mom dies, and manages to escape the destruction of their ship by being sent out to sea. she ends up on the island of caelus, near the village of kynohue, where akane lives with her mother. akane is our other protagonist, despite the fact that she'll be missing from much of the actual story. her father was killed by pirates after standing up to a crew who attacked their village, and so akane's life has not been great lately either. kynohue is now a tributary village that has to pay to the pirates monthly/quarterly in order to live.

the story as i conceptualize it now has at least two arcs. well, technically three if you count the pre-actual written story arc involving arete's mother, iriyin. the arc i'm working on for nanowrimo is an arc that covers arete and akane's life together in kynohue (with akane's mother, emi), which lasts for around five years (it won't be entirely sequential; there's mostly the beginning, scattered scenes showing growth and the passage of time, and then the end, but i'm still at the beginning if that makes sense). after those five years, when arete is fifteen and akane fourteen, they get separated after the village is attacked by the pirates, though not before making a promise to meet again one day.

after that, there's a six year time skip, and the story will pick up again with arete, now twenty-one, truly beginning to build her crew. her end goal has always been fulfilling her mother's wishes (which she is magically obliged to as well) and finding the Star Heart, but there's of course a lot of ocean to explore and other side routes to take before them. she's also waiting to reunite with akane as well; the two have no idea where the other is in the world, or if they're even alive. i've got a ton of cool characters in planning stages for their actual crew (a deaf swordsman, a miracle doctor, a navigator with a perfect sense of direction on a quest to find her brother, assassins, etc), but for nano i decided to focus on the first arc because that's what is solid in my head. not sure how much will actually make it into the main wip, but it's been ok so far.

alright, i hope this all made sense! there's a ton more worldbuilding behind the scenes, but these are the key conceptual details you need to know. thank you for your interest!

[bkyngw]

wow thanks to all of you who gave me [checks notes] 20 notes on my fucked up fantasy magical system post with my doomed old man yaoi couple. im glad you like My Guys.

Under the cut are clearer notes that I transcribed including additional information. I admit this is a First Draft kind of list and not 100% set in stone, mostly trying to brainstorm ideas and i will eventually refine it to fit the story i want to tell.

BRIDES

Also referred to as “Dolls” as a pejorative.

According to the biggest religion, they are individuals who are “chosen” by god to become vessels of magic power.

Brides become physically indestructible and immortal. Their body stops growing/changing at the age they are Chosen except for their hair (on their scalp) which continues growing and also cannot be damaged/cut. This is how ages of Brides are usually visually determined

Brides cannot hear any human voice except for their Spouse, and become mute.

They are tied to a handler, or “Spouse/Husband” in order to be able to regulate their power or else they will die. A Bride refusing to get married and dying is considered heretical since they are seen as they are seen as “wasting their gift from god.”

Brides are compelled to follow orders from their Spouse.

The High Church are the only ones who can officiate “Marriages” to bind Brides to their Spouses. (Or are they…?)

Brides are very rare. 1-2 pop up every century on average (author's note: i am still deciding on the frequency)

Selection of Brides are arbitrary based on ethnicity or location, but the average age people get chosen is between 15-25, mostly women. Occasionally men, and that opens a whole other bag of homophobic worms.

Male Brides are usually married into the Church (re:the pope) as to not challenge patriarchal norms. There are specific circumstances where Male Brides are sublimated into a “women”’s role but thats not usually desirable

Asa and Theo’s Marriage is a Hot Political Opinion Topic among general society

this world/region is “culturally” this religion, so Chosen Marriages heavily influence what is expected of normal marriages (PATRIARCHY 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO!!)

Other religions exist, but they’re either results from schisms (Re: Catholics vs Protestants) or basically discriminated against/ wiped out

The general unspoken opinion is that once Chosen, Brides are no longer human but basically objects that people use for power/utility/status/war

Bride abuse is extremely common and normalized.

Very difficult to kill a Bride, however they will die if they eventually run out of magic (Their Half-life is extremely long), killed with a rare enchanted weapon specifically for Killing Brides, or a Secret third thing (!).

Married Brides are usually passed down through generations of the Spouses’ family. It is highly unlikely a Bride will be traded off or given away UNLESS the family is under extreme pressure or forcibly taken.

If a spouse dies unexpectedly (murder/assassination/etc) before the above is formalized the Church will marry the Bride back into the Spouse’s family. This is to prevent assassinations among the privileged class to free up Brides for Marriage.

Brides from lower class families are usually taken from their homes by the Church and married off to Powerful families who contribute to the Church’s power. Dowries are usually paid to the family but it’s basically hush money.

If a Bride happens to be from a family with status they are usually married back into their family.

Reasons why Asa and Theo’s Marriage is considered “progressive”:

Asa is not from a highly wealthy or high-status family

Theo is from a well-off (but not High Status) family

Theo is a male Bride formally Married to a Spouse and not to the Church, and did not formally take a “women”’s role.

Asa and Theo’s dynamic is seen as unusual/deviant from this society’s expectations of Marriage; Asa gives Theo more agency than what Brides are usually afforded.

Asa and Theo’s Many Issues With The Church:

Theo is considered EXTREMELY POWERFUL by Bride standards.

The church and people in power are internally divided on their Marriage - some are waiting for Asa to die naturally so they can marry Theo into the church “Peacefully” and others want to excommunicate Asa or kill him to do it sooner. Some people want Theo's power for themselves.

Asa has had a couple attempts on his life in the past but they were unsuccessful.

Asa is sitting on the fact that Marriages are Basically a Fucking Lie Made Up To Oppress People which scares the church and also makes them mad. As far as anyone knows Asa and Theo's Marriage was officiated by the church but that is not true. How this develops is Spoilers, and would be revealed in their Story (lmao)

[thornheartcat]

Quarantine NOT Anime Reviews!

So obviously I’ve been watching a lot of anime but I’ve ALSO been watching a lot of live action stuff, mostly on Netflix with my mom and sister. So here’s some reviews of stuff we’ve seen.

Everything’s Gonna Be Okay (on Freeform/Hulu): Fucking hilarious and has some of the best, realest autistic characters I’ve ever seen. If it doesn’t get renewed I’ll be fucking pissed.

Motherland: Fort Salem (on Freeform/Hulu): this one’s not done airing yet but I am already a full fan! What if there really were witches in Salem, and they made a deal to work in the United States military? This leads us to a world where the American military, and subsequently most militaries, are witch-based, but some witches aren’t exactly hot on the idea that their bodies are basically state property from the time they turn 18, and as such have created a terrorist group known as the Spree to fight this. Our heroines are three young witches who have answered the call: Abigail Bellweather, the descendant of a long line of powerful and decorated witch soldiers who is determined to prove her own ability; Tally Craven, the optimistic, wide-eyed descendant of a dying line exempt from the draft who answers the call anyway out of a genuine desire to help others; and Raelle Collar, who is dealing with her grief over the fairly recent death of her mother, a prominent military healer, but starts to warm up to fellow recruit Scylla Ramshorn, the daughter of conscientious objectors who hides a dark secret: she is a member of the Spree. You can tell a lot of thought was put into the world and the alternate history (the show even has its own conlang), the magic system is unique and interesting, and I’m super invested in the characters and their relationships. I really hope this one gets renewed as well, as the creator has said he’s got enough ideas for four or five seasons at least, and I’m really interested in how they’ll play out!

The Half of It (movie, Netflix): You’ve probably already heard about this Love, Simon-esque story of a Chinese-American girl finding herself and her sexuality in a rural town while trying to act as wingman for a dumb but kind and lovable jock, and I can’t recommend it enough. It’s a single film and you DEFINITELY have the time, so give it a watch.

Never Have I Ever (Netflix): ohhhhhhhhhhhh my god y’all have GOTTA give this one a watch! It is one of the funniest fucking things I’ve seen in AGES! The story of a desperately awkward Indian-American teen dealing with grief over the death of her father while trying to become cool and get laid somehow provides all the laughs you need right now, and some feels as well. My sister and I both CANNOT decide if we want Devi to end up with Ben or Paxton, because they’re both very flawed people, but also good and they clearly both really like and care about Devi! I cannot WAIT for the hopefully inevitable season 2!

Sex Education (Netflix): Holy shit this show. Asa Butterfield’s mom, Agent Scully, is a well-known sex therapist, and this (as well as other things) has led him to simultaneously have a plethora of knowledge about sex while having a weird relationship with it personally. After he ends up giving good advice to the school bully regarding performance issues, he and the trailer caravan trash school slut Maeve decide to open up their own secret sex therapy clinic to give advice to the student body. The show tackles nearly every sex and relationship related subject one could imagine, from gay kids uncertain about how to go about it to vaginismus to asexuality to realizing you’re pan or bi to sexual assault, all with a central theme of the importance of open and honest communication. It also touches on other aspects of life like race, religion, class, drugs, abusive families, divorce, disability, the whole gamut. I’m eagerly awaiting the confirmed but definitely postponed production of season 3 and I’m curious to see what else the show will touch on as it goes.

Outer Banks (Netflix): A show that could, in some senses, be described as “what if Riverdale was actually GOOD?” Set in the Outer Banks of North Carolina, we follow a group of poor teens (Pogues) and their struggles against the rich kids of a neighboring island (Kooks) as the Pogues try to find a lost treasure of a fuckton of gold with the help of one good Kook. In most ways it’s a typical teen drama with 25 year olds saying they’re 16 and silly relationship drama and little subtlety, but the central mystery really ties it all together and the second half is actually nail-bitingly intense as things go from treasure hunt mystery to "oh shit I’ve been framed for murder and the cops are all after me” and the season ends setting up for more, so I really hope Netflix chooses to renew because I HAVE to know what happens to all our heroes after this!

Felicity: Felicity is an ancient show created by JJ Abrams?????? about a boring girl who moves to New York to go to college and find herself and shit. My mom is making me and my sister watch it because it is one of her favorites of all time and I am just not digging it. We are watching it on DVD so I don’t know where it’s streaming but also I don’t care because I don’t really recommend it.

Expect more reviews as I watch more stuff!

[vaguely-concerned]

Some more webcomic recs!

Hotblood: Follows the story of centaur James Rook, a washed out Civil War vet and secretary to the irreverent, criminally-inclined steel tycoon Asa Langley. JESUS CHRIST, you guys, the landscapes in this thing always fuck me up big time, they’re so gorgeous and perfect and astonishing, the colours of the outdoor scenes perfectly chosen and delicate and fjsdalfsdj it so good. It’s completed and a manageable length, has some excellent Western undertones, doesn’t shy away from taking the time to develop the characters and their grey morality as well as the central M/M romance, and moves at an interesting, almost serene pace; I found it to be a very relaxing read. Also, as stated, incredible scenery. Like. damn. 

...I feel compelled to point out that as the description states one of the guys is a centaur and the other isn’t, which I suppose you could take as a deterrent or... whatever else you might consider it... as you wish lol. For what it’s worth I’m normally Extremely Not Into That but wasn’t bothered by it at all in this -- there’s implied sexual content but nothing explicit, and the whole thing is really rather sweet, in a morally ambiguous dumbasses sort of way haha.

ALSO: don’t go into the sequel unless you’re ready for some sadness! I know I would have liked some warning about that ahead of time, and this story is otherwise completely self-contained and fairly happy! 

Tiger, Tiger: From the comic’s own about page: A young noble lady steals her brother's identity and his ship to sail across the world to find love and adventure, and to write a book about her favourite subject: the fascinating life cycle of sea sponges! mwah *chef kiss emoji* honestly what more could I ask for, what a sentence, what a premise. Wonderfully expressive and precise art with amazing details and charming (...if not always the brightest haha) characters. There’s also Dat Good Queer Content and crossdressing hijinks ahoy. My favourite character is Jamis, who is a 7 foot tall bisexual disaster with a glorious beard described as having ‘a head made of wood and a heart made of gold’, which is not normally my type but dang if he isn’t making it work for him.  

Witchy: Set in a richly developed fantasy universe where the strength of magic users is determined by the length of their hair, and the government conscripts people with promising locks -- which is very unfortunate for our main character, who understandably carries a grudge against the system over the murder of her father. The art is so unique and pretty, the world is intriguing -- described as ‘a melting pot of Asian and Oceanic cultures’ -- and there’s a talking birb who I naturally adore and treasure. 

Run Freak Run: I’ll level with you: this is some of the most stunning black and white art I’ve ever seen. Every time I look at it I just... glance at how the artist has chosen to ink a particular piece of a background element or something and have a conniption because it’s so unfairly, stupidly beautiful and elegant and weird. Okay with that out of the way: it’s self-described as a ‘gothic comic about  medieval witch hunts, mythical creatures, and evil queens’, and also has a strange but warm sense of humour underlying it all. It’s finished and manageable to read (nine short-ish chapters altogether, mostly vignette-style entries that slowly build up to something bigger), has some excellent F/F with a happily ever after going on, and while I think the art slightly outshines the writing it’s an extremely enjoyable ride. (Quick warning: there’s some full frontal (though very unsexy... unless you’re into some weird shit I guess) male nudity in a couple of the chapters!)

[touchingmadness]

One of my characters is a mad sailor and inside the empty socket of his left eye is a vast pool of magic.

Duuuude! That’s so cool! I’m a sucker for pirates (and pirate-types), and the whole eye thing is so unique!

Okay, a related fact…

My resident cyborg, Asa, can basically interact with the internet through lens surgically attached over his eyes. (I mean… It’s not the internet by our understanding of the word, but a close enough approximation.) He can also file and view memories through this viewing system, which makes him really good at remembering names and faces.

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

New Black Lightning this week!

SUCH a great episode

But god, there were moments in this episode that made me anxious...

I mean I am really glad that they did not shy away from showing just how shitty and dehumanising the way people are treated when corrupt pigs like Cayman and his greasy haired little shitbag buddy decide to go after them is but still, seeing the way Jefferson was treated here and how afraid and powerless it made his family felt got me tearing up more than once in this episode, especially the moment with Lynn and Jennifer

I loved the moment with Tavon and some of the other students trying to stand up for Jefferson...but god it was sad (But also sadly realistic) when Jefferson had to tell them to let this happen because he knows full well that people like Cayman will just ruin their lives as well...and the scene with Jennifer nearly losing it and unleashing her powers on these bastards who were framing her father...

Henderson finally getting the upper hand on the corrupt, racist, repulsive sacks of shit in the Freeland PD was SO cathartic though...I really do feel for Henderson on this show...he obviously genuinely does have good motivations in thinking that he can fix a corrupt and racist system from within and does genuinely want to help people...but he’s also not naive, he knows exactly what he’s facing...I really want to see him at least get to make some kind of positive difference and seeing him at least get to rid the Freeland PD of some of its corruption (And also put that little creep Cayman and his hideous pornstar moustache behind bars) felt good to see...

I loved the solution Anissa and Gambi came up with to get the ASA off the scent of Jefferson being Black Lightning...that was a clever move indeed

And I liked how things between Jefferson and Gambi aren’t just magically okay again...Jefferson is still angry about what Gambi did and what he kept from him but there might be a way to move forward...it felt much more realistic than everything just Instantly Being Okay...

LOVED the opening scene of the episode too with Jefferson and Anissa in action together...it’s so fun seeing these two working together and I love how they’re getting better and better as a father and daughter superhero team in the way they work together and mesh together...some of the CW shows haven’t always done the best job of showing multiple powered heroes working with each other (The Flash seems to not always be sure how to best handle this for instance) and using their powers to compliment each others fighting styles but here it feels like they really gel well with Anissa’s super strength and Jefferson’s lightning powers working in tandem

Also I don;t remember if I’ve said this before but I’ll say it now anyway: I really love the soundtrack of this show?

It’s awesome :D

And I know I’ve said this before but I’ll say it again: the Pierce family moments on this show are SO DAMN WONDERFUL...Lynn comforting and being there for Jennifer in this episode and also the ending with the whole family together...MY FEELS <3

[papermoth-bird-blog]

New Orleans: Clowns & more curious things.

I’ve always thought the best way to really learn a city is to walk until you can’t walk anymore, and then, take the transit. I know I have a tendency to romanticize things, but New Orleans is feeding this reciprocally. I mean, it’s definitely more dangerous than the cities I’ve spend time in before, but it also has an air about it that draws you in. This is the start of Carnival season & many of the houses are decorated with beads and Banners already. Some even have floats parked in their backyards (7th ward). King cake is front & center in terms of deserts. It’s the most sugary thing I’ve ever tasted- crunchy, gooey, buttery- like candy-cake. Almost felt like something a 7 year old would make if left to their own devices in the kitchen.  Not usually my style at all, but it was worth it for saying I have. Other local foodie things that I liked a lot more were Swamp pop (particularly the Satsuma one) & Voodoo chips- which Asa and Leon definitely got me hooked on. Apparently you can get Voodoo chips everywhere in the states- but it’s definitely a Cajun thing, so I’m glad I tried them here first. 

New Orleans is as bright & filled with life, as it is dark & full of death. The houses are colourful and decorated, but many of them still have the spray paint markings left on them during the post-hurricaine search. For every fun-feathery mask, there is a decapitated Crocodile head. For every person playing jazz, there is a person behind a curtain reading palms, or tea leaves, or tarot cards or crystal balls, or what have you. 

Yesterday, I decided to get my palm read... because when in Rome. And let’s be honest, the reason I’m here in the first place is for similarly mysteriously-provoked reasons. I decided to go to Bottom of the Cup, which is one of the more established fortune-telling joints- and honestly, you probably pay a premium for that too. I was fine with it though, cause I’ve been pretty good so far about staying on the low end of the budget. So I’m sitting in the cafe for a good 20 minutes patiently with my camomile tea, when my reader rushes my me & kinda grumbles for me to come in. It was a man, which I didn’t realize would be strange for me- but I don’t think I’ve every had my fortune told by a man before. He honestly looked like something out of Tim Burton sketch book. Tall, thin, austere-looking. He was wearing black skinny jeans, rolled above the ankle with shiny black boots. He also had on a peacoat  that had the collar popped up beside his ears- which he kept on, even when inside, because everyone is freaking out about the “cold” in NOLA right now (it’s 8 degrees.. which is unseasonable cold here, but by comparison, it’s fine). He didn’t ask me much, but my Sign, which is Aries. He told me I didn’t have typical Fire hands- actually more Watery (but I had fire fingers apparently). Which is funnny, because most people, when guessing think I am a Pisces through&through. Honestly, I thought what he told me was pretty accurate- that I would be unhappy to settle doing one thing for too long, that I tend to have really deep-genuine connections that are slightly ephemeral by nature (because it would take a lot for me to settle down with one person). Something about a triple life-line? anyways. Anyways, what was more interesting,  was (maybe cause of my broken fate line?) he brought up that he really think I should do DEATH MEDITATION. I kept a pretty good poker face, but I was all WTF IS THAT. Basically he wants me to sit there & visualize my body decaying & sinking into the ground- apparently this will both help with any anxiety I feel (dunno bout that) & open me up to receiving messages from spirits. Of course, I’m thinking of the whole “go to new orleans to learn about death” thing. So might have to give that a shot soon. I have a recording of it too-- so for any of my close friends- we can listen to it together (Katie & Mare... I know y’all might want to). Charlie also mentioned I should be careful with my manifestation, because I’m very very good at it & I should use it more sparingly. Which I again, kinda poker-faced, because That has been another huge thing that has come up in my life more recently- I am really good at manifesting exactly what I’m seeking. Even freaky, off-the-beaten path type stuff... stlll looking for a witch for a place that has no seasons though, Mare.  (As another tangent, I have this thing where I test out if I can manifest certain songs as I’m walking though areas where the radio is playing. So far, fleetwood mac, rising appalachia & bob dylan have alllll met me there- which sure, could be co-incidence, could be magic???)

This, however wasn’t the most novel, or most curious thing I’ve been up to so far--- which has to be Clownless. Which, as you may remember from my previous post, is the all-clown cast adaptation of the 90s classic film ‘Clueless’. It was “staged” in the Marigny, in a very DIY type-theatre in what was either an old warehouse, or a large garage. The front was open & held a art show with works featuring clowns. Bright ones, Macabre ones, all sorts. Many people were dressed as clowns too- which made Asa wish that we had had time to dress-up before hand too (alas, we were at Sarah-Jane’s art show, which would have definitely of been less-appropriate). We were all jammed in the car tho, which meant we definitely looked like clowns as we all tumbled out of the front seat when we pulled up to the theatre. The play itself was a host for crude, queer, self aware comedy. It was definitely funny, but a little “sticky” at times. Overall, so glad I went, cause I mean, when else am I going to get that opportunity again?! It is funny how often clowns are coming up for me on this trip so far- I really don’t think the world is usually so clown-y. Maybe it’s me, maybe it’s the Zeitgeist. 

After the show, we all went back to the house and got into a big discussion about how odd Louisiana is as a place. I mean, it has a lot of influences- French, Spanish, English, American & the huge legacy the Slave trade has left on the place. The liquor laws were the fist thing. (I already talked about that though). Asa started to tell me about this strange tradition here called “Prison Rodeos” which is as barbaric and horrifying as you can imagine. It’s like modern day gladiator trials. Prisoners can win money by staying in a chair for the longest amount of time while a bull attacks them, and other “fun” stuff like that. And people go to these things. In droves. On the bright side, they also have prisoner craft-market things that the prisoners can sell their woodworkings, or leather-workings, or what have you. Asa showed me the really beautiful ostrich wallet & the really odd “Highwater dragon” sculpture that he got when he went. The fact that there are more people in the prison system today than were ever slaves really jumps out to me here. It’s “out of sight, out of mind” though, and so it isn’t really being thought of as the HUGE issue it really is. It’s been a super humbling experience in that way. 

Though not as horrifying (?) I was also told about other traditions that come from the swamp- including a certain kind of roast that I now forget the name of. But basically, it’s a roasted hog, stuffed with a racoon, stuffed with a Nutria (Which is a giant, swamp dwelling, dog-sized rat). And apparently this is an actual tradition. I’m not one to judge, but I sure am glad I am a vegetarian & have a valid cop-out for indulging in that one. 

Another tradition, which is far more familiar to me is ‘Fais Do-Do’. Which is the Lousianan answer to a Ceilidh. These fiddle parties, however more likely take place in a neighbourhood street, more so than a kitchen (probably cause of the heat). I’ve yet to go to one, but I’m working on manifesting one while I’m here still. 

In the 7th especially, I’ve found a lot of people have been greating me with “I hope you are staying warm.” Which I’ve just smiled about because, in Canada, this is late summer/ early fall kind of weather (which is kind of my favourite). I mean, there are still flowers in bloom here! Full blown blooming Magnolias. Too be fair, it is unseasonable cold here. A couple of days ago it was 8 degrees! Which happened to have been the same temperature it was in Halifax that day (but okay, it was unseasonably warm there that day). Yeah, I do wish that I was experiencing the normal 18-degree “winter” they have usually, but it’s definetly been okay with me. The only thing being, the houses and buildings aren’t entirely equiped for weather like this. The floors are tiled, ceilings really tall- designed to keep the house as cool as possible, which is great, except on days like these when they are then cooler than even the outside temperatures. 

If this was winter, I really started to wonder what summer was like over here. I mean, I can only imagine it being a little bit unbareable. Asa’s friend Satori described New Orleans as “Seasonally Biblical” in reference to not only the heat/humidity, but also the awe-striking influx of insects (including, termits & other kinds of swamp bugs). Apparently there is pretty much a mass exodus from the city, for those that can afford to leave. 

I love how people dress down here too. A lot of the people in the Bywater dress super gothic (and for that I am happy). Lace, black, pin-stripes- It’s a style Jack White would be pleased with. Many of the folks are also wearing fur in this weather- very 1920s vibes, but with slightly weirder & wilder cuts/colours. On my first day I even saw a man dressed up like a full voodoo priest (not even in a hokey way). He was just casually sitting on Elysian-Feilds, eating an ice cream bar. It was kinda glorious. 

Every morning, I’ve been the first to wake, which has kind of been nice. I usually eat my breakfast in the backyard with the cat & listen to the mardi gras beads lining the fence blowing in the wind. I then journal a little & think of all my gratitudes. It’s super peaceful & grounding. Missing the hali-fam rituals though. Overall though, I’m quite enjoying the amount of alone time I’m getting. Travelling alone so far, as been super rewarding. I feel braver & confident & more autonomous than ever. The only down side, I’ve discovered so far, is that you have to ask strangers if you still have powdered sugar on your face apres-beignets. 

[shirtlesssammy]

First Blood : Recap

250 episodes. I can't believe we've already reached the quarter episode mark of Supernatural! Who am I kidding, they've got more than 1000 episodes in them, right?

Then:

The British Men of Letters are a menace and the family that hunts together, stays together, er, except for the whole mom leaving, the angel hunting Lucifer alone, and sons getting imprisoned in solitary confinement thing.

Now:

Mary sits quietly at a diner, sipping her coffee, when she gets a call from Castiel. He wonders where she is: Lawrence. Sensing Cas's distress, she asks what's wrong. "I, ah, need you to meet me at the bunker." *Click* Still working on that Chatty Cathy thing, I see. He wanders off screen, presumably to the bunker.

"Six hours ago, Sam and Dean Winchester tried to kill the president of the United States." An unknown government operative (UGO #1) briefs another unknown government operative (UGO #2) about the new guests in their secret, underground bunker. UGO #2 wants the full dossier on the boys. UGO #1: "Assault, murder, multiple accounts of desecrating a corpse." "The same corpse?" As UGO #2 learns the full details of the attempt on the POTUS's life, Sam and Dean are transported to their new shinier bunker, and locked away.

UGO #1 suggests they take care of the Winchesters the easy way, but UGO #2 likes to play with his prey before breaking them. They could connect to something much bigger. I like the calm 1950's Interrogator vibe UGO #2's got going on.

UGO #2 proceeds to talk with Sam and Dean, separately. He questions them about their motive for the attempted assassination. "You're going to talk to me, son." He then lets them know that torture doesn't work. You know what does work? Nothing. 

He's just going to let them sit, and think, and stare at the blank walls of their cells. They'll talk eventually. And no one is coming for them so they've got all the time in the world.

Sidenote: UGO #2 doesn't know about this motherfucker~

Meanwhile, Metatron Mick (and his cartoon beard) sits at a magical typewriter to relay the latest to the Home Office.

He's been trying to make inroads with American hunters, but he's not having much luck "Let me paint you a picture, of a world without monsters or demons, or any of those little buggers that go bump in the night; of a world where no one has to die because of the supernatural." Uh, dude, we like to watch our Winchesters so we'll just keep things as is. Thxkby. Ok, that's not what the hunter dude Mick is talking to is thinking, but he seems super impressed to me.

Actually, what he really says is gold all on its own: "You can take your offer, and you can shove it up your ass. I'm sure it won't be too painful, what with those soft hands of yours."

Back at the bunker, Mary is completely UNIRONICALLY angry at Cas -CAS!- for leaving Sam and Dean. <INSERT A THOUSAND GIFS OF CAS SAYING "I’ll go with you"> It breaks my little Cas-loving heart to watch this scene. Mary's emotional and projecting her own guilt on Cas. (Hmm, who else in that little family projects his issues onto others?) Cas is so demoralized he just takes it because he feels like he did fail the brothers.

Dean finds a loose screw in his cell, and starts the daily scratch on his wall. Man, with walls that soft, all he needs to do is ask for a poster of Raquel Welch and he'd be outta that place in no time! It's feeding time anyway. Dean's a-ok with the grub, but sadly, Sam did not get the kale smoothie he requested at the commissary.

Cas reaches out to Crowley for help, but Fergus is too busy drinking his mai-ti to expend any more energy on Sam and Dean Winchester. "Do you even care that they're gone?" Cas implores. "No." Crowley has full faith that they'll make it out ok; they always do. 

Mary consults John's journal (like, that seems to be the one thing that won't help the Winchesters in this new "humans are the real bad guys" world). Anyway, she hears a phone ring in Dean's room. It's Alicia, Asa Fox's daughter. They need help with a pack of werewolves. She's on the case! Very Dean of her ---if she can't solve the most pressing issue, might as well keep hunting for the sake of distraction.

Dean now has quite a few hash-marks on his wall. And while watching the episode live, Boris literally called it on Sam exercising about two seconds before we saw him start his calisthenic routine. So like Sam. Things are looking pretty grim though for our boys.

With time passing, and no hope of finding Sam and Dean, Mary and Cas meet up at a bar. Mary is sorry for her previous actions, but Cas still takes full blame. Poor bby. They have no leads. And Sam and Dean have been gone "Six weeks, two days, and ten hours." Oh, Cas. Cas then tells Mary about his inability to even solve a case. I know people are confused about how this is "Cas with his mojo back" but I think this speaks to Cas's mental state --and how human he feels. He has zero confidence in himself right now. He's no angel. He doesn't feel at home anywhere. He thinks he's still a hunter-in-training, and he's failing without his support system. And just like the man he fell from heaven for, he's going to take full blame for everything if he can't fix them. Mary suggests they take care of the case together, but Cas declines. "No, I'll only get in your way."

Chow Time. Only NOT! Sam and Dean are both DEAD!!! I love how they supposedly did CPR on Sam but he hadn't been moved. Lol.

In the morgue, the Dead!chesters are laid out. UGO #1 and #2 are arguing it out about what a waste keeping them locked up was, before turning off the lights and leaving.

Cas is alone in the dark bunker. 

Back at the morgue...*SURPRISE* Dean gasps awake! He's ALIVE! Praise Chuck! They're both alive! I was worried there for a mo. Just then the morgue doctor walks in and they ambush him for answers. Where are they? He doesn’t know. They steal his phone, and take off. Making it outside before any CCTV catches them, Dean calls Cas. “This is my voicemail. Make your voice…a mail” No answer!

Dean tries again, and again. Finally:

Cas: What?

Dean: Cas

Cas: Dean!?

Dean: Hey, buddy. Long time.

Us: SQUEEEEEEE

Dean quickly cuts to the chase and tells Cas they’re in Rocky Mountain National Park. Meet them as soon as possible, they’re kind of on the clock. *Click* Sam asks Dean if “he told him.” “Nope.” Hmmm. (Natasha: On a rewatch this hit me hard. They’re on the clock because they’re trying to escape, but also so that one of them can say goodbye forever to Cas before they die. God DAMN it, Winchesters.)

Mary walks away from a den of beheaded vampires when her phone rings. It's Cas! He tells her that he heard from Sam and Dean and she rockets her way to meet him in Colorado.

UGO #1 and 2 walk into the examining room to check out the Winchesters' remains only to find both bodies gone and a tapping sound coming from the body drawers on the wall. It's our bumbling doctor!

“Whoopsie daisy,” he might as well have said. The troops move out to the Benny Hill theme song. “These guys are killers. You got eyes, you pull the trigger,” UGO #1 orders curtly so that we all know the stakes.

Cas meets up with Mary and suggests backup – perhaps Crowley and Rowena? Mary scoffs at turning to the King of Hell and a witch so Cas thinks of someone else...t.b.a. (You know in the old days it woulda been Charlie. *mourns quietly to myself* *Boris joins in*)

Agents Surly and Affable hunt the Winchesters and rib each other. You’re out of shape! You’re mentally unstable! Bromance!

Cut to Dean and Sam – still hunted. Sam guesses that they've got about about an hour until dark, 6 hours to midnight. “Dean,” Sam says. “We've gotta talk about this.” Is “this” feelings? An escape plan? Stay tuned, kids. For now, they leave their big ole bootprints in the mud before wading into a stream. (Bobby would be chewing you out, boys.)

Back on the road with Mary and Cas, our guilt-fueled duo meets with Mick and Mr. Ketch. Mary is understandably NOT OKAY with this plan. “Suddenly the demon and his mommy don't look so bad.” Cas sticks up for his Crowley/Rowena plan and mentions that they helped take care of Lucifer.

Mick is impressed. “THE Lucifer?”

“Did you win?” asks Mr. Ketch. When Cas answers in the affirmative, Ketch lauds their success while he stares at Cas with his horrible, cold shark eyes...

“But, Sam and Dean were taken,” Mary interjects, pulling this recap back on course. They need help. And, huzzah, the BMoL are happy to help.

Mick notes that the American hunters have been a difficult barrier to their main goal in the U.S., which is to “make friends.” Right. Anyway, he goes on to describe hunters as “surly, suspicious, [and they] don't play well with others.”

“Well, that is accurate,” Cas notes.

Mick tells Mary that if word gets out that they helped save THE Sam and Dean Winchester then it'll help their cause with American hunters. Mary reluctantly agrees and tells them that her boys are being held in the Rocky Mountain National Forest – which the BMoL immediately identify as “Site 94”, a shadow-ops facility. They'll run a satellite scan of the area. The pairs depart, ready to find our boys.

Back in the woods UGO #1 and UGO #2, best buddies by now, find the Winchesters’ footprints. They're on the trail! The camera pans back to the Winchesters who are awfully close by. The boys hide behind a tree and tackle one of the soldiers who has trailed off on his own.

Dean picks up the solder's walkie talkie and has a friendly chat with the agents. “What we have here is a failure to communicate,” He says with relish. “’Cause we're not trapped out here with you. You're trapped out here with us.”

Dean and Sam find an old cabin and immediately take stock of what's inside. Sam lights a lantern, which seems like a really terrible idea. Dean grabs a bear trap. Yeah! Let's Home Alone this mother. The boys get to work and soon enough, the agents are upon them. They see the lantern illuminating the room, and someone passes in front of the curtain. Those wily Winchesters must be inside.

Once inside, the cabin appears empty. The soldiers stalk in and around the cabin when the Winchesters begin their attack. Soldiers are non-fatally shot and knocked unconscious and then we're down to two: UGO nos. 1 through 2.  UGO #1, the bigger jerk, gets trapped in Dean's Home Alone bear trap while UGO #2 gets cornered by Sam with a gun at his head. The boys walk away. Really, with that swagger they might as well be wearing sunglasses and walking away from an explosion.

“Who are you?” UGO #2 calls after them.

“We're that guys that saved the world,” says Sam Fucking Winchester.

Cas greets Sam and Dean in the woods. Sam gives him a giant moose hug before flying to hug his mom. Dean gives Cas a solid bro hug before joining the Mary Winchester hug pile. Cas looks on, happy to see his family together again.

Sam and Dean aren’t pleased to find the BMoL hanging out by the cars but there’s no time to hash it out - they’ve got to high tail it out of there. The people they left will call for backup. Mr. Ketch immediately gloms onto this, calling their mercy “a bit unprofessional.” They all exchange meaningful LOOKS of suspicion before getting into the car and taking off.

As they drive back home Mary's car cuts out suddenly. “It's time,” Sam says. Cas throws Dean a goddamnit what did you do look and they all get out of the car. Billie waits for them on the road. She reveals that Dean and Sam made a deal. Billie would kill them and then bring them back to life, thereby helping them escape. On one condition: Billie gets to kill one Winchester for good by midnight. Ding, dong, Cinderella.

In response to Mary and Cas’s looks of horror Dean explains that being locked in that solitary cell was worse than Hell. “You don't have to do this,” Cas grinds out. But Billie tells them that they made a blood pact, strong as the cosmos.

“Who's it gonna be?” Billie asks and Dean and Sam exchange sorrowful looks, ready to engage in a sacrifice-off. They're surprised by Mary, though, who offers herself. Billie magically pins down Sam and Dean and Mary, trembling, takes a gun and points it at her own head. DAMN IT, WINCHESTERS.

Mary tells them she loves them. And then Billie dies, stabbed through the heart with an angel blade.

Fuck yeah, Castiel

(Though I am genuinely sorry about Billie.)

I know the entirety of Tumblr has already done this quote but I'm including it for reasons, okay?

Cas heartbreakingly, emotionally tells them, “This world. This sad, doomed little world. It needs you. It needs every last Winchester it can get and I will not let you die. I won’t let any of you die. And I won't let you sacrifice yourselves. You mean too much to me. To everything. Yeah, you made a deal. You made a stupid deal. And I broke it. You're welcome.”

FUCK. YEAH. CASTIEL.

The Winchesters all look at each other. Because. Damn. (Boris: I want a 5 page analysis paralleling Cas killing Billie to Dean killing Death. Please and thank you.)

Cut to Mick typing away merrily on his magic typewriter. We learn that Mr. Ketch has “dealt with” everyone who knew about Sam and Dean's arrest. He's also made inroads with the American hunters. Great! Good job Mick.

Oh wait. He's talking about Mary.

God damn it, Winchesters.

Boris: Man, after this episode, this show needs to rename itself Natural. Barely a supernatural being around. But seriously, I don’t know if it was the hiatus or what, but I loved this episode. It hit all the right notes —enough to hand wave away the questions about Cas’s abilities. That being said, Andrew Dabb loves Cas, and we love him for that. This was such a strong episode for Cas. I think it’s really setting up the rest of the season for a major character development. Yay! We know he’s a Winchester, but it’s going to be so nice to see him realize he’s a Winchester (goddamnit, this better be the endgame.) I also have to give kudos to Mary’s story. Mary continues to have her own story and agency. I'm so trained to having the woman be a plot advancement or helper or foil for the main characters (not necessarily spn, but all tv/movies) that I'm just shocked and mad at her for wanting to find her own way... but I'm cool with her working with the BMoL because this is her path. She’s not just here to bake pie for Dean. They better not fucking kill her. And finally, and most controversially: Destiel doesn’t exist. Lolz.

There are no friendly quotes:

They might be the tip of some nasty-ass iceberg.

Chow time!

Sam and Dean, they're like herpes...just when you think they're gone, hello, the boys are back!

This is my voicemail. Make your voice...a mail.

The last two months we've been sitting around with our junk in our hands because you wanted to wait them out.

Maybe this is some slow your heartbeat kung-fu crap.