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#the only other thing i've done lately
penisbilt · 2 months
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the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now
#latimers parents not mine!!!! i am NOT moving back to florida LOL#really hope that the changes will be good for my mental health. this apartment is toxic to us#ive been on the verge of meltdowns Kind Of A Lot lately. imnot doing great#extremely dependent on substances. just to reach a baseline level of functioning. but even that isnt working as much anymore#the only things i do on my phone or tablet these days is like. 2 mobile games. and skirting past my dms to check latimers blog#its too overwhelming to even open discord these days yknow. everything on earth is too much for me right meow#i havent been drawing i havent been social online OR irl i havent been cooking or creating#i havent been keeping up with personal hygiene like at all im particularly ashamed about that one#i've been really bad about doing my T the past few months which is a HUGE shame because im SO fucking hyped to be on it#theres just. too many obstacles in getting it done half the time. and the other half of the time i just forget#anyway. anyway.#our lease ends in july so between now and then we're just gonna try our best to tolerate our living situation enough to get by#there's a light at the end of the tunnel. and its called 'i only have to be in charge of like 2 rooms at most. and not a household!'#we're gonna try to slowly comb through all our things between now and then so the process of moving wont suck as bad#cuz listen. its pretty fucking bad right now#maybe not for other people. but it is for me. and its okay to let myself come to terms with that#im just. so relieved. still very stressed! but theres at least light at the end of the tunnel and its only like 2 months away#ill be able to draw guilt-free again. ill be able to just EXIST guilt-free#i dont think ive felt guilt-free for just existing the way i do since like. turning 20#i know my mom wouldve loved if i stayed home forever. and im sad i cant be there for her#but ever since i had a fight with my dad at 15 or 16 it just really felt like he didnt want me there more and more#maybe as the youngest he was resenting that i was preventing him from becoming an empty nester or something. i dont know#because all the other kids had been moved out and on their own at least once but i had never left home before#i dont know if he'd be heartbroken or not to hear that i feeling like he was resenting me. but thats the energy i was picking up for years#i dunno. i dont know#anyway. back to housing. for now im going to try to relax and store energy for the moving process#the huge pile of things by the kitchen? i dont have to worry about that becoming permanent because we're leaving in 2 months#the general discord of the state of our possessions? we have to go through everything to pack it all anyway. we can move in RIGHT this time#when we moved in here we didnt have a car or license so we were dependent on latimers 3-hr-drive-away parents to help us move#just /across town/. and we had a whole month between leases! but it still had to be done in a weekend
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raiiny-bay · 4 months
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unfortunately i'm obsessed with project zomboid again
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strawberrycamel · 11 months
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Communal DPxDC tag blocklist
heyy, so i'm just gonna share all the tags i've been using to block DPxDC posts bc i think it might be helpful for others trying to avoid those crossover posts.
First, the official tag that is meant to be used for dp and dc crossover posts is DPxDC (without spaces) and you are not supposed to tag either of the main fandoms when you make a DPxDC post.
That being said, my blocked tags are:
(edit: put under a readmore bc its a bit long)
anger management prompt
anger management ship
batpham
dan phantom x jason todd
danny phantom batman
danny phantom dc
danny phantom dc crossover
danny phantom x batman
danny phantom x batman crossover
danny phantom x dc
danny phantom x dc comics
danny phantom x justice league
danny phantom x young justice
danny x jason
dc x dp
dc x dp anger management
dc x dp au
dc x dp crossover
dc x dp fic
dc x dp fic idea
dc x dp prompt
dc x dp writing prompt
DC+DP
dcxdp
dcxdp crossover
dcxdp prompt
dp + dc
dp anger management
dp dc
dp dc crossover
dp x batman
DP x Batman DC
dp x dc
dp x dc anger management
dp x dc au
DP X DC Batman
dp x dc crossover
dp x dc fanfic
dp x dc fic
dp x dc headcanon
dp x dc prompt
dp x yj
dp/dc
DPDC
dpjl
DPxDC
jason todd x dan fenton
jazz x jason
jazz/jason
Ra's x Jazz
tim drake x danny fenton
There is also the option to put things in 'Filtered Post Content' which is right below 'Filtered Tags' and I've recently started to use it to block
DPxDC
As noted in the last reblog of this post, you can go full scorched earth in Filtered Post Content with one fandom to try and avoid DPxDC crossover posts as well. This doesn't work personally for me, since I like both fandoms separately, but it might be useful for others.
Please feel free to add to the blocklist!
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ff2-soda-pop · 4 months
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I'm starting to question if I should even bother with the stupid paper.... I'm probably just gonna fail anyways lmao
#ive been running around stuck on Babysitter Duty for the past three days and the teacher only gave us any instructions on thursday yet#somehow expected a full paper done and edited by sunday. even if i wasnt stuck on babysitter duty she'd get a shitty paper just due to how#little TIME that is to get things done. but because i am on babysitter duty uhhh..... well so far there's no paper#ive been spending practically full days having to take care of my sister and i cant just Ignore Her so i havent done my paper while watchin#her because again: my focus needs to be on Her. and shes incredibly loud which makes it super hard to focus. fun combo /s#so i was like 'i'll just stay up Really Late and do it then' but that hasn't worked because my sister WONT GO TO BED if im awake. i was up#until 4am last night hoping she'd fall asleep and shut up and i could work but Nope!#and then i got too tired to even care anymore#i've tried explaining this to others and they're just like 'ok well you just need to find a way to make it work :/' which is very much#easier said than done! and im scared about this paper because this teacher doesnt accept late work at all for pretty much any reason#and im sure she wont understand my situation. because shes also the teacher that didnt understand that i didnt have the textbook on time#because it was still being shipped and i dont control the rate at which book ships and she was like#'..........okay well you still need to have the book by tomorrow at least <3' when i told her the book had Just shipped and idk when i'd ge#the dumb thing. so yknow i dont have high hopes about this#also just as extra 'make stuff more difficult' i have zero accommodations because my mom cant keep track of my fucking IEPs and they wont#let me have accommodations unless i have that and idk how to get a copy anymore. so i've also been running around with no help in that area#and it's not great </3#idk im just stressed out and frustrated and i Want To Cry :)#vent
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tanicus-caesareth · 2 months
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guarana drama, damage control
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tielesiti-eftu · 7 months
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hey so remember when I posted a while back about stealing a character design from AI slop
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this is Celia Whiterose and the art was somehow one of the last things I made in the process of making her. in between making the art, I wrote a fuckload of lore and character info. gonna paste a bunch of it under the cut
✨~haiiiiiii~✨
okay so. the lore I'm working with right now is that Celia used to be the Proper Actual Queen of Hearts in her Wonderland. aesthetics-wise for that Wonderland, I'm picturing a vibe like a mix of the Disney movie and the Tim Burton movie because Lol™. this Wonderland exists alongside a so-called "real" world, otherwise known as Fantasy Earth, and humans aren't able to see an entrance to Wonderland unless someone from Wonderland goes through it. the only Wonderland citizens that are able to go between the worlds freely are the royal family and anyone with one of their pocket watches. Celia, being The Queen, qualifies for that. she ran away into the real world after a mass breakout of a curse-disease-thing called "Unreality Madness," believing it would be the only way to be safe from it and potentially find a solution. she disguised herself (mostly by shrinking herself down to not be ridiculously tall) and left for the real world, where she lived for a long time. she tried to tell people about what happened, hoping for a solution, but people don't tend to believe that a parallel world exists that they can theoretically go to when they can't even see the entrances freely, and Celia was afraid to go back for fear of being (probably rightfully) called out for running away, so she just Didn't. she has depression because of it. her belief is that if she can get close enough with someone in the real world, maybe they'll believe her and she can try to fix the mess she left behind. unfortunately, a continuous streak of bad luck and cosmic joke coincidences routinely keeps that from happening.
some specifics on Unreality Madness: it's something that makes Wonderland citizens effectively disappear, dubbed "becoming not real," after going through extreme mood changes. stage 1 is always severe mania, and stage 2 varies between individual cases, but it's always able to be boiled down to experiencing one emotion at extreme levels, and different subsets have different titles (sadness would be Bawling Madness, depression would be Muted Madness, anger would be Fuming Madness, etc). the only thing that isn't a possible result is more mania. stage 3 is more or less a toned-down version of the person's normal self, but this is the point where they start to believe they may not be real, and this feeling gets worse as the stage progresses. if someone in stage 3 is fully convinced they aren't real anymore, they go into stage 4, which sees them actually becoming not real; this can be postponed by generally being around other people that believe they're real, but the funny thing about believing you aren't real is that you start believing others aren't real either, so if a large group of Wonderland residents came down with stage 4 Unreality Madness, then things tend to get a bit less exist-y pretty fast. once a person with Unreality Madness has been in stage 4 for long enough to also believe nobody else is real around them, and nobody around them believes they're real either, they vanish. technically, stages 3 and 4 can last indefinitely if at least one person without Unreality Madness regularly interacts with them.
personality-wise, Celia is very muted after everything that's happened to her. she's also very particular about time; if you agree to meet her for something, and you don't show up, she's going to find out why. she has a seemingly endless supply of pocket watches, which she uses as mementos to give to people that she considers friends. the watches themselves have some other properties; particularly, if you break one, you can temporarily project yourself back in time as a ghost, so you can see what happened but not affect things. Celia specifically is also able to break these with her bare hand, then jam that hand against a corpse to resurrect the person as something from Wonderland. she also has various props and treats from Wonderland; cookies that make you grow, small drink bottles that shrink you, paints that can alter the natural color of plants or animals, pipes with smoke that forms into letters, and so on. Celia can also create normal versions of any of these items without any effects, with a notable exception being her checkerboard cookies; unlike the frosted lofthouse cookies she can make, the checkerboard cookies are always just normal cookies.
the bracelets she wears are made of metal, and are able to transform into gauntlets similar to brass knuckles. Celia doesn't normally have to use them, hence why they turn into bracelets when they aren't deployed. these bracelet-gauntlets cannot be removed, as they are also her royal scepter, an heirloom passed down to the next-in-line when the acting ruler of Wonderland is unfit to rule anymore. it ordinarily isn't supposed to be altered in any way, but due to the current circumstances in Wonderland, Celia is giving herself some leeway. so long as it doesn't leave her side, it's fine in her book.
around people she feels safe around and truly cares about, Celia may remove her disguise and re-enter her normal form, a completely on-demand transformation that Celia performs when she feels like she has nothing to hide from. Queen of Hearts Celia is four times larger than her disguise and sports a different outfit, as well as her having a generally more cheerful default mood. her fur becomes pure white, her eyes change shape somewhat, the colors of her eyes shift around, the somewhat muted blues of her dress have shifted to vibrant reds and blacks, her dress has grown larger and now goes down to her ankles, her socks have changed to be red-and-black stripes with a black sole and red pawpads, her scepter regains its normal form, and the lofthouse cookies she produces have changed shape to appear like card suits (the checkerboard cookies remain unchanged). she now walks with a much more pronounced bounce on every step, and one can often see the latest winner of this royal rabbit's trust peeking from the front pocket of her dress. Queen of Hearts Celia has more control over the world around her, with enhanced time control by using her scepter that allows her to physically go forward and backwards in time temporarily, along with now being able to shape and transform it to mirror her Wonderland as she desires. this world-altering ability, which she calls "Wonderland Shift," is similar in execution to resurrecting someone as a Wonderland creature, but it now extends to non-sentient objects around her and even living people as opposed to only the recently-passed. Queen of Hearts Celia is also physically unable to harm things or people without intent; any building or infrastructure damaged by mistake is repaired by it automatically going backwards in time, passerby who fail to notice her approach and become trampled rise moments later without even a bruise, and so on. on the flipside, she is much more wrathful if upset, leaping into the air and growing thorny rose vines from the ground to ensnare and choke people that make her angry, sometimes even beheading them if she deems the transgression worthy of death. often, she reverts to her disguised form after the anger fades into apathy, and it tends to take some time for her to be able to return to her Queen of Hearts form.
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aberooski · 1 month
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I love my gx winx au and I love that it's just bits and pieces of me being like oh that's fun and not having any semblance of lore or plot. It's purely contained to the character designs I've drawn for the girls.
#it will stay contained to art too it's not something I'd ever write#like I know absolutely nothing about this au of mine but I'm obsessed with it all the same#like I learn something new about it every time I've drawn something#I don't draw a lot for it yall have seen everything I've done and it's usually just a drawing of alexis cuz I love her design lol#but like I'm doing panels for it rn right? and like it's just coming together like the story of what's happening atm#and that's like the only story there actually is rn but it's just falling into place#so I can actually make something of substamce out of this tiny concept I had for a drawing I wanted to try because I had an itch and it grew#that doesn't really happen to me anymore like I haven't felt a spark like that since I wrote OUAD#nothing I've written since has felt the same#and like I said this isn't something I would write into a fic or anything it would just be too much but it's really everything to me rn#something I can come back to and dip my toe in whenever I really feel like I need a spark again and it just makes me happy#I grew up with 4kids winx club so another reason I'd never write anything for real is because I refuse to watch any other version#like I've tried I just can't do it my mind rejects any other version so I only know the universe to a point anyway and but that was my thin#it made me so happy as a kid and it still does now like those are my girls and they mean the world to me and being able to play#within that space with other characters I'm obsessed with and combine into something that miraculously works is amazing#I need to draw more stuff for this au I guess is my whole point#I need to see what other things can..... bloom....... (heh) within that space and what will just manifest before me#I need that something to make me feel that spark again because I don't want to lose it forever and I think I'm starting to find it again#life has just been knocking down over and over lately and it's destroyed so much of my mental state and honestly randomly deciding to try#and actually draw actual stuff for this au has been so healing. I almost feel lighter#it feels stupid amd silly to say but it's true#abby's just rambling don't mind her
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dandyshucks · 4 months
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i try to keep my blog lighthearted and silly so I hold my tongue on a lot of things (.... i could vague all day about how a lot of alternative fashion trend face tattoos/drawing on face with eyeliner are racist but I will simply leave it at this LMAO) because frankly I do not have the energy or mental clarity (or functioning nervous system) to educate on a lot of matters, but this one has just been slowly eating at me and the dam broke when i saw someone in the notes of a s.elfship post using "delulu" as an insult
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eggmeralda · 5 months
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I may have lost all hope
#it's a weird feeling?#like since late 2022 it's been kind of like. bad vibes consistently#and i tried to stay somewhat positive throughout it#but idk there's this very distinct feeling now of like. i can't describe it but it's completely gone#like I've actually got nothing to live for#nothing I've done or wanted to do since i was 14 has ever really like amounted to anything#all the friends i made i never feel like i can talk to#once again in that state of 'only alive so my family don't get sad'#like even when i wanted to just stop existing when i was 21 there was this tiny bit of hope still there a little bit#like i remember for that whole summer i kept getting quick thoughts about suicide but I'd always push them out of my mind instantly#but there was one day where i let the thought stay in my mind for a little bit and like properly considered how i would do it#and then after a bit i was like FUCK and then went and walked like an hour away from my house to try and forget it#and then after that day i slowly got better. and it was annoying bc it meant now i had to walk a whole hour back to my house#but even if those 2 months there was still this feeling of this isn't gonna last#bc i knew i was back at uni in a few months and at least i had music to listen to#and all the other times I've been in that state there was still this sort of feeling that it'll get better bc I've got things to get me#through it#but it doesn't feel like that now. like no job no friends no hyperfixation and now i can't even enjoy any music#anything i create is pointless bc only i care about it#all my friends are busy doing other stuff I'm like not even second best I'm the most forgettable person anyone might know#the only thing that would fix me is getting a random train to like some place I've never been#just to see a new thing i guess#but anyway#ramble#suicide mention
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vasfasan · 11 months
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me when my dad tries to push me into IT and away from Film Prod:
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now my logical followup is rewatching rogue one for the first time since seeing it (multiple times) in theaters i believe? Will i cry a lot, which i am always prone to do w/media & things but all the more so lately, it seems
#and having a whole [at least one season's arc of prequel for Best Character] will surely just make it a more regular experience#also was thinking hm i'd like to rewatch especially those episodes of the Visible [lgbtq TV history] eps that akd narrated then was ft in..#eps three and five respectively i believe (the one in between like Eh) but both did already make me cry lol. how'll that go now#not like a difference in reaction like ''wow that's sad / moving'' i'm just more proximate to reacting to that in turn by tearing up fr lol#always something when like. the very specific Stressed Abt Life i actually cry over directly is just like#being stressed Enough but then also having to try to Talk. only lately do i realize that being autistic may have always been relevant thus.#& i don't think it's like A Bad Thing either b/c crying is bad (hooray for crying) or i think it's bad it comes all the more readily to me.#even if it's still like [augh. media] or [i'm burnt out / overwhelmed / bit of a meltdown feature as it were] Particulars for me lol#think the last ''i'm crying b/c i'm just like sad kinda encompassingly'' instance was like. once in 2017? & god knows when prior to that.#anyways i've had nothing going on on paper that'd be ''impressive'' but i've done nothing but Become More Powerful in past years.#and in a good way lol. all the less of any hurdles or whatall in going ''oh that's sad :'('' abt what i would already find sad. & i'm yknow#elevated & vivacious with it oft lol. like my other [crying scenario] is a lil burst of teariness b/c i got riled in a Good excited way lol#my power strength confidence stats are up so like hell yeah i'm weeping over media where i'm sad all the more easily lol#plus me and everyone else eh#unless you don't really. in which case hell yeah to that too#rogue one
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mildmayfoxe · 1 year
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i know i'm always busy because i'm doing it to myself but i'm tired of always having a million things to do and always feeling behind and being jealous of people who don't have a huge list of work to do on the weekends. and also friends to hang out with in their free time
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A fic? For The Devil Judge? I couldn't help myself 🫠 I've honestly never written a fic for a K-drama before, so we'll see how it turns out. I'll post it when I finish regardless 😪
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mattynmarns · 2 years
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hey so
#ive taken some time to reflect on everything and I'm still going to be dream posting#less than usual but i think im going to be posting everything less than usual#ive talked with trusted irl people and ive reflected on people/celebrities that i continue to support who have done the same or worse thing#and ive come to the conclusion that based on what we've seen of dream's character and what his irl friends say of his character#that a) theres no way he'd do something like this again and b) we've actually seen no real proof of anything#but yeah im trying to step back from sm in general#because ive realized the conclusions i made prev about this situation wouldn't be what I would've made without the influence of The Dash#i need to remember that theres a life outside of tumblr so I'm stepping back from it#not stepping away but ill stay logged out and i already don't have the app#so now ill only check it occasionally like once a day maybe rather than have it be my social crutch#personally i cant condemn someone without any evidence and there wasn't anything i found unforgivable or criminal about the SHOWN messages#however if other evidence comes out ill stand back and reevaluate#but yeah if you want to unfollow block or whatever i understand#ill still be posting dream but he's going to be tagged#but i think this situation has been drawn out of proportion for all we know right now (ex. the words that have been used)#and i think ultimately dream has done more proven good than proven harm and that's a factor for me personally#and i also want to add that the anti-men posting that I've seen lately fucking sucks. like that's terf rhetoric#and as a trans man i dont think that's very epic 🥴#and i want to add that if you are choosing not to support him that that's cool with me like i honestly dgaf#butttttt i come here to relax from my real adult life that already stresses me out#so im only going to follow people that don't stress me out#so yeah#just wanted to update yall on where i stand#im finally becoming a normie 😔😭#tumblr has been an addiction so im finally cutting myself off o7
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bpdanakins · 2 years
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now playing 0 for 6, Popeye
a collaboration with @werewolfharrington, because we both stan one (1) accidental milf
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sheerioswifties · 1 year
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#so today i broke down and fully cried over realizing the reality that i probably won't be able to go see Taylor on this tour#and i felt so stupid for it like crying over not getting to see a concert seems so trivial and i mean so many reasons but like#and like i don't cry much anymore like I've been through and am in so much pain and horrible stuff constantly and so much stress and trauma#but I've built up strength to not cry over those things like if i did I'd just be crying nonstop so i channel my emotions into trying to#solve the problems and like still I'm so unbelievably stressed but like also as an empath i feel everything really deeply but usually lately#the things that make me cry are more like sweet animal rescue videos acts of kindness touching stories or really deeply inspirational or#relatable things in books etc but so like I'm like mad at myself for crying over this but#i checked the stubhub like prices for what tix are going for and it's fucking over 500 a pop for nosebleeds i just#it's infuriating the scalping and how many hard core fans are unable to go bc of that but rich ppl who aren't really fans i just. 1000 bucks#for 300 level is just no I'm sorry that's not ever gonna happen and i just#i really thought I'd just find tickets over time closer to the event like that's how I've done several concerts but then i looked and saw#that and I'm like oh my god and that's before fees and then there's the gas to get there the repairs that need to be done to the car to get#there all the other fees involved and in realizing oh my god like I've been overconfident and now i don't see a way and I'm so sad and i#just broke down its i know iy seems stupid but first this feels like something that might not happen again anytime soon if ever the way the#world is going out could be last chance and rep tour was the first time I'd been able to see Taylor to begin with and the experience was SO#amazing it's like the one thing i looked forward to this year that lifted me up in really dark times and again i feel shitty when there's so#many fans who never get to see her international too i just. I'm sorry I'm just like this breaks my heart on levels and like#i hate how money dictates everything i hate that i went to eds last tour tickets in the same venue were 30 DOLLARS and even the Taylor ones#i think were like 75 and now it's so high bc only scalping it's so fucked up and like I'm already in a really bad hole money wise bc of#an emergency issue that happened and I've got some scary medical things going on waiting on tests and having trouble with rent and food and#gas so like i can't even try to be like. you know? like justify trying to save up that much even when i got all this#i just.
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