#the system wants to swallow me whole and goddamn if I won’t make myself poisonous

[the-broken-pen]

I suffered a mental break after writing like eighteen college essays and wrote the newest one about a bagel and I just call it college essay bagel and it haunts me but like objectively it’s funny because it’s about a bagel you know? And my English teacher is gonna throw a book at my head when she finally reads it

[therainroguefanfiction]

🔥 ℝise Ⱥbove I̾t ◈ Chapter 020 [Living Valley Online]

📑 Table of Contents | ◂Backward

Author’s Note: So, this was obviously inspired by the third ending, “Datte Atashi no Hiro” by LiSA. I love that ending and I thought it would be cool to explore that RPG side for a couple chapters! You can watch the clean version at the bottom of this page~

Word Count: 2,344

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〈“If you don’t like the way I talk, then why am I on your mind? If you don’t like the way I rock, then finish your glass of wine. We fight and we argue, you’ll still love me blind.” Dua Lipa, “Blow Your Mind (Mwah)”〉

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“She was… a villain?”

Toshi nodded, hanging his head. “Alissa grew up as an orphan on the streets. She became a mercenary at a young age in order to survive. As she grew up, she came to care less and less for the rules society tried to force upon her and so… she became a contract killer.”

“A mother fucking assassin…”

“Yes. Her quirk, ‘rogue’, made it an easy profession for her. She could use stealth at will, and she was well versed in all manner of poison and venom.”

“Holy fucknuggets,”

“I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to hate her. Alissa’s rough childhood shaped her into who she became because she had no one to guide her, to show her love. She was utterly alone in life, and she did the very best she could with the cards she had been given.”

“Her past was pretty bad, that’s true,” Aizawa interjected. “But everything she did was her own choice. She understood that better than anyone and she didn’t go around making excuses for her actions. She took responsibility for her poor life choices.”

“Alissa had already begun to turn her life around when I met her. Rather than continuing on as an assassin, she chose to become a bounty hunter instead.”

“Ain’t they the same thing?” I raised a brow.

“No, they’re not. Bounty hunters don’t kill their targets, they incapacitate them and hand them over to the police.” Toshi held up a finger as he explained. “She stopped killing people and started to attack only criminals that had done terrible acts of violence. Actually, that’s how we met. She saved my life from a group of villains when I was in my last year of middle school. Of course, I had heard all of the rumors surrounding Alissasears, but she was surprisingly kind to me. She made sure I was unharmed and safe before taking off. After that day, it was like fate had decided that we would continue to cross paths. And then…”

“She turned herself into the police,” Aizawa muttered. “It was all over the news for months how the police had finally apprehended the famed assassin.”

“But she became a hero, right?” My brow furrowed. “How’d that work?”

“She made a deal with the police commissioner. In exchange for her cooperation and testimony against several top villains that she had done jobs for, they would let her go free. She agreed to this, giving up multiple associates and old clients. Because of her actions, twenty-five top villains of the time were taken into custody, but… she was never free again after that. She was under constant surveillance by both cops and villains. No one trusted her. Just like that, she was completely isolated again.”

“So you weren’t kidding when you said she had a lot of enemies, huh?” I swallowed, leaning back a bit.

“No, I’m afraid not.” Toshi heaved a heavy sigh. “As far as most people are concerned, Alissasears ‘retired’ from being a hero because of the target on her back, but there are a few people that know the real reason behind it.”

“Which is?”

He lifted his hand, pointing a bony finger at my heart. “You, young Jen. When she became pregnant with you, her whole world took on a new meaning. She did her best to avoid the public eye, but with so many people watching her so intently, she knew that that could never happen. Not here, anyway.”

Aizawa humphed. “She kept what she was planning a secret from all of us. She didn’t trust anyone… except for this idiot.”

“Even then, she didn’t tell me everything. The day she tried to leave, for example. Alissa kept telling me that she was planning to make a break for a different world, but she never told me when she was going to leave. And then she tried to run.”

I scratched my cheek, my brain trying to process all of this new information. My head is really starting to hurt… “You told me before that she… uh, died in your arms… How’d you find her?”

“When she was heading for the meeting spot, she realized that the hero killer, Stain, was following her. She panicked… I’ll never forget getting that message from her. I was on the other side of town at the time, attempting to help save a group of women being held hostage. Maybe if I had left immediately instead of waiting, she…”

“Tch,” I leaned forward, flicking him hard between the eyes. He winced, blue eyes snapping to meet mine. “All these years and you’re blamin’ yourself, aye? Not cool, Toshi.”

He gave me a sad smile, nodding his head. “I have many regrets when it comes to her, but… the past is the past. There’s nothing I can do to change that.”

“Hmm, and you’re trying to make amends by taking care of me, huh?” I cocked a brow, folding my arms over my chest.

He jumped out of his seat in surprise, blood spurting from his mouth and onto the white blanket draped over Aizawa, who glared at him. “Of course not! I mean, in a way, I hope it makes up for my failures, but I genuinely do care about you, young Jen!”

“Calm your man tits, I was kidding.” I grinned.

Aizawa continued to glare at him, not that he noticed.

Toshi took me by the shoulders, his expression dead serious. “No matter what happens from here on out, I promise you, Jen, I won’t let the league of villains take you. I don’t know what they want from you, if it’s some sort of revenge or if they have other plans, but I won’t give them the chance.”

His sincerity caught me off guard. My grin softened to a smile as I pulled his hands from my shoulders. “I don’t need you to defend me ’cause I’m gonna get stronger. I’ll defend myself and everyone I care about. Let that blue-haired freak come for me. I’ll make him regret the day he was fucking born!”

Toshi smiled proudly, giving me a nod.

“You can both leave now,” Aizawa grunted. “And get me a clean blanket.”

“Oh yeah, that reminds me.” I rubbed the back of my head, giving them a blank look. “Apparently I can teleport,”

“…what?!”

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“Are you fucking serious?!”

I winced, pulling the phone back away from my ear. “Do you have to be so goddamn loud?”

Bakugo scoffed from the other end of the line. “Bitch, you just told me your mom is Alissa-fucking-sears!”

I scratched my cheek. “She’s that popular, huh?”

He was silent for a moment. “Oi, have you told anyone else?”

“No, you’re the only person I really talk to, bro.”

“Good. Don’t fucking mention that to anyone else, got it?”

“D’aww, are you worried about me, Bakuhoe~?” I grinned.

“I TOLD YOU NOT TO CALL ME THAT!! And no I ain’t worried about your dumbass! Are you gonna fuckin’ log in or not?!”

“Yeah, yeah, geez.” I put the phone on speaker, setting it on the coffee table beside me before picking up the controller and booting up my game system. “What’s this game about anyway?”

“It’s an RPG,”

I hummed. “Doesn’t seem like your kinda game,”

He scoffed. “It’s currently one of the hardest games to fucking beat. I’m gonna destroy this fucking game and leave all those losers in the dust!”

“‘Kay… but why do I have to play?”

Silence.

“Bakuh -”

“Shut up,” he grunted. “This stupid game doesn’t let you play alone.”

“And you have no friends, huh?”

“S-Shut up, bitch! You don’t, either!!”

Yeah, but I’m not the one trying to play a multi-player game. I rolled my eyes as the game loaded.

“Hurry up and make your damn character!”

“Don’t fucking rush me,” I scowled, selecting the swordmaster class. “Fuck, there’s so many options. Why are there so many options? This is hella detailed for a free game.”

“Che, I’m gonna go get food. You better be done by the time I get back!”

Hm, should I make her look like myself or a completely different person? Making a cute ass guy is also an option. Meh, I’ll just make her look like me with a few subtle changes. Let’s try… green hair? Ooh, girl, green is not your color, fam. Blonde maybe? Oh, that actually looks pretty dope, but it’s too normal. Red? Not nearly as cool as Erza Scarlet. Damn, that blue looks amazing, though. Maybe I’ll dye my real hair that color for a while.

Now for the clothes. I’ll just choose some pants and a basic, plain shirt with boots. I confirmed her looks and the game started to load. I heard a door opening and slamming over the phone, followed by the obnoxious sound of someone munching loudly on chips.

“Are you done yet?”

“Just loaded in.”

“Ignore the fuckin’ NPC and come outside.”

“No can no, chief. Gotta do the tutorial before I can leave.”

“For fuck’s sake!”

I chuckled at his impatience. “Tuts usually aren’t too long, keep your thong on.”

And I was right. Five minutes passed and the tutorial ended. I left the building, a blinding white light filling the screen.

それ以上に上昇 ☆ Living Valley Online

Bakugo was waiting outside the building, leaning against the wooden support beam. He wasn’t wearing a shirt, but he was wearing an open vest, the top rimmed with thick white fur. Red fangs hung from his ears, and various necklaces and beads hung around his neck. His pants were blue, white fur between the hem and the top of his black boots. Red cloth was pulled over his elbows and a cutlass was strapped to his waist.

“Fucking finally!” he scowled, holding his palm up. A blue screen projected in front of him and he glanced at me. “Swordmaster, right?”

“Yeah,”

He pressed on the screen a couple times before a sword materialized in his hand. “It’s only a rank twenty, but it’s better than that shitty rank one on your back. Trade me.”

A blue screen popped up in front of me: ‘LordXplosionMurder has requested to trade with you.’ I accepted and selected my sword, while he added the higher level sword and some potions. We both confirmed the trade and I took the sword out to examine it. The metal was dark grey with a faint sapphire-blue glow around the blade. The handle was wrapped in leather with wolves stitched into it with black thread. The game said it was a blue item – rare.

“Let’s go! We need to power level your ass!”

I hummed as I followed behind him, strapping the sword to my back. The fantasy city we were in was called Rune Province. According to the information popping up beside me, this is the main city in the game, but it was only medium-large in size. The buildings were made from white brick and dark oak wood. Lanterns hung beside the doors, a cream-colored candle unlit inside.

Hmm, so it’s a fantasy middle-age type game without electricity.

“Hey, what’s the max level in this game?” I asked, glancing at his back.

“One hundred eighteen.”

“And what level are you?”

“One hundred.” He growled, clenching his fists. “You have to pass through the fuckin’ Jade Forest to get to the level one hundred one area, but you have to have at least one level eighty in your party to enter the fucking place.”

“Sheesh. How long you been playin’ this shit?”

He mumbled under his breath.

“You’re walking in front of me, Bakuhoe, I can’t hear you.”

“Since it came out!” he yelled, earning weird looks from the citizens and other players. “And stop fucking calling me that, bitch!”

If I remember correctly, the download page said this game came out a little under a year ago. Has he been playing alone this whole time? I sped up so I could walk beside him. “So, how are we gonna power level?”

“We’re going to Moonbrick Manor,”

I hummed, folding my hands behind my head. “Sounds interesting. And I just gotta let you fight, right?” He grunted and a screen popped up in front of my face: ‘LordXplosionMurder has invited you to a party!’ I accepted and he stopped in front of a wooden post, atop which was a whitish blue stone with a teal swirl in the center. He put his hand on the stone, grabbing my wrist with the other. A bright blue light surrounded us, blinding me.

When the light faded, we were standing in front of a large wooden door, standing at least twenty feet tall. We were on a stone bridge surrounded by spruce forests as far as the eye could see. I glanced over the side of the bridge and whistled. This shit is hella high off the ground, so much so that I can barely see the river flowing underneath it. The fog hanging in the air didn’t help my visibility, either.

“Stop gawking and let’s go, bitch!” Bakugo barked.

I approached the gate, lifting my hand to the wood. A red screen popped in front of my face: ‘Warning! You are about to enter a level one hundred dungeon. Your current level is one. You will definitely die. Proceed?’

I sweatdropped. No pulling punches, huh? “Uhh, Bakuhoe. Don’t think this area is just a bit too high?”

“Hah? Are you scared, tiger?” He smirked, folding his arms over his bare chest.

The fuck is with that nickname, brah? I scowled, “No, I’m not scared, but it’ll take ten times as long to level up if I keep getting one shot when an enemy so much as looks at me.”

He rolled his eyes, approaching the door. “Just stay the fuck behind me and you’ll be fine, dumbass. I’m not weak like you are!” His body walked through the door as if it were made of water.

I have a bad feeling about this, man.

With a sigh, I accepted the warning and stepped through the door.

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[into-the-demimonde]

Season 7, Episode 3, “The Queen's Justice" Review

This week on Game of Thrones, Ice and Fire come together for real as Jon arrives at Dragonstone. Meanwhile Sansa shows her leadership skills at Winterfell and a familiar face returns. Jorah departs the Citadel in good health, Euron presents Cersei with the spoils of war and Jaime leads the Lannister army to Highgarden.

Virginia: I was actually somewhat disappointed by the meeting of Jon and Daenerys. She was really getting on my nerves with the way she was talking to him. I know, I know, it’s her birth right. Just like it’s everyone’s birth right; since the show’s beginning, that’s what everyone’s been arguing about. That being said, she was really pissing me off.

Alex: I never thought I’d say this in a Daenerys Targaryen vs. Jon Snow scene, but I agree. It felt like her character had regressed back to the crazed conqueror she’d seemed to have mostly gotten past last year. There’s always room for a little regression, but her insistence that Jon “bend the knee” got a little grating. I’m glad they’re dealing with it, though, and pointing out that she’s acting like the lesser of two evils rather than the breaker of chains.

V: I don’t think the old system of one ruler of seven kingdoms is going to work, or ever be the case again.

A: That’s what I figured the ending would be, but I was hoping she was already on that page. It’s funny, because the rest of the show is really steamrolling ahead, but this feels a little like wheel spinning.

V: it’s true. Her behavior towards Jon and Davos seems like something out of last season, something we should have been done with by now.

A: On the plus side, it lead to some good stuff from Tyrion. Instead of working his diplomatic gifts on their enemies, he’s now trying to negotiate peace between the good guys. He’s stuck between a rock and a hard place, but it’s fun watching him get them each to give a little.

V: There hasn’t been enough Tyrion this season. I hope later episodes give him more focus. It was a little humorous to hear Dany’s introduction followed by Davos simply naming Jon.

A: That had me rolling. Davos is perfect for deadpan humor. I hope Tyrion has more to do going forward too, and I imagine he will. If Daenerys’ numbers keep getting depleted at the rate they’ve been, maybe he’ll be forced into the field again like in the Battle of Blackwater.

V: although she didn’t get a lot of focus, this was a good week for Sansa. It was great to see her shine in giving directions in Jon’s absence.

A: She’s really stepping up. The previous couple of episodes showed that she’s grown harder than Jon, and she may be a necessary balance to him, just as Jon and Daenerys likely are for each other.

V: that reminds me, a lot of people online and some people I know personally think those two will end up together. However, last season they implied that Rhaegar was Jon’s father. We’ve had incest before obviously, but always with villains. Surely they wouldn’t pair two of the most popular characters who happen to be related?

A: I don’t think so, and I certainly don’t want them to. I don’t really know who I think will be paired – I actually wouldn’t mind if they resisted the urge to pair everyone up with someone in the end – but I can’t see her with Jon. The family link makes it creepy, and I think it would detract from them learning to work together if they just became lovers. But honestly, the only guy I’m 100% sure won’t end up with Daenerys is Jorah.

V: oh, definitely. He’s so far in the friend zone that even Sam can’t help him. I don’t see it as being very likely anyway, as this isn’t a show about people being happy or living in wedded bliss. I don’t think Dany will find love again, and why should she? Although Jon deserves a second chance, as Ygritte was a bitch anyway.

A: I’d be fine with either one of them finding someone if it felt natural and right, I just don’t know who it would be for either of them. Outside of Ygritte (and I agree, I didn’t like her much either), the only woman he’s spent much time with is his sister. There was the Wildling girl in “Hardholme” that I really liked, but she’s a White Walker now, or a White Walker zombie henchman or whatever they turned her into. He’s shared all of five contentious minutes with Daenerys; if they put those two together it would feel like fan service.

V: I also feel like she’d be the dominant partner in any such union, and that kind of creeps me out. All of the scenes involving the Lannisters were amazing this week. And like you said earlier, that’s not something I ever imagined myself saying.

A: Oh, boy, were they! I love Cersei as a villain, and one of my favorite things about her is that they often put her in a situation where you’re actually rooting for her, despite how evil she is. They did it last year and the year before with the Sparrows (although that was all really her fault anyway), and this week they did it with Ellaria.

V: she couldn’t do anything to those bitches that would make me feel sorry for them. I was waiting for Ellaria to die, but this was so much more satisfying. And what you say is true of a lot of the show’s villains, including Ellaria. Although in her case, knowing her motivation doesn’t make her any less intolerable.

A: That scene was brilliant because, while it was obviously reminiscent of Cersei’s revenge against the Sparrow nun, replete with the Mountain standing there to intimidate, it also acts as a mirror to Cersei’s imprisonment by the Sparrows. Ellaria brought this on herself by poisoning an innocent girl, and she was so full of herself she never thought she’d have to answer for it, as Cersei did when she let the Sparrows loose. And, again like Cersei, her children are paying for her sins.

V: that’s a running theme in this show, people suffering thanks to their families. And in this episode they stated outright that you can’t judge someone for their family’s behavior. As an aside, this was the first time Jim Broadbent’s character said anything nice to Sam.

A: I like how that played out. It would be a little hard to swallow if he completely berated a guy who just revolutionized modern (for them) medicine and cured an incurable disease.

V: at first, I thought that’s exactly what he was going to do. One of my favorite characters died this week. Olenna Tyrell is the only one I can remember who died and yet still seemed to be the winner. Did you see Jaime’s face?

A: That was terrific! It was exactly the way she’d go out too; making sure it was as painless as possible for her and as painful as possible for her killers. It’s a real shame to see her go; she was always fun when she showed up, and I liked her being part of Daenerys’ team.

V: me too. And I loved the way she talked down to annoying people. She never disappointed. At the same time though, she was probably OK with dying. Her whole family is gone.

A: That’s true. It’s sad to think about; she lived through both of her grandchildren dying, and now the people responsible for it are killing her. Her parting shot at Jamie is all the revenge she’s able to muster.

V: and even something so simple as telling the truth was so satisfying.

A: A Quantum of Solace, to invoke another franchise involving Diana Rigg.

V: Speaking of her death, wasn’t that magnificent when Jaime led the troops to Highgarden? So well shot, and the music was positively haunting.

A: That whole sequence was wonderfully played. It’s excellent writing too. At the end of last season they ended on a note that made it seem like Daenerys was going to swoop in and annihilate evil as easily as she’d done in in those slaver cities. Between Euron taking out the Greyjoys and the Sand Snakes, and now Jamie playing bait and switch with them to destroy the Tyrells, the heroes have become the underdogs while the Lannisters have been revealed as a threat unlike anything Dany’s ever faced. That’s as it should be, and I imagine after her attitude towards Jon this week her ego will be put in check a little bit.

V: and that’s going to be quite cathartic when it happens. This season has to be a reversal of last year’s setup or else next season couldn’t exist. However, I must say that I was genuinely shocked when the Unsullied were surrounded by the Greyjoy navy.  By the way, Bran’s back and he sucks.

A: That was so lame. It was treated like this huge deal, but Brann is so goddamn weird. He talked to Sansa like he was a serial killer or something.

V: that was sooo creepy. I get that he’s a god or whatever, but this lack of empathy for his sister isn’t cool at all. We have to deal with this kid’s boring story for years and this was the payoff? Boo!

A: Now that he’s back at Winterfell, II hope he just kind of fades into the background until he has an actual purpose to serve. Something other than getting innocent people killed to protect his own boring ass would be nice.

V: I hated that last season. I understand that was supposed to be this grand reveal, and I was shocked. But it just made me hate Bran.

A: Same for me, and I was never even much of a Hodor fan. It isn’t even just that Hodor sacrificed himself, but he spent his whole life knowing that was what he was there for, and Brann went back and did it to him in the first place. I never cared for Brann before, but when that happened I started actively hating him. Jamie was right to push him out that window.

V: again, making us sympathize with the villains. I never thought much about Hodor until then. What bothers me is that he didn’t volunteer his own life, Bran mind-raped him into the situation. What the fuck.

A: That’s exactly it. And now he’s acting like a pretentious, entitled little jerk on top of it.

V: since this show likes to subvert expectations,what if they kill the three eyed Raven?

A: I’m in.