#the takeaway is to not surround yourself with miserable people.

[cosmossystem]

on separate spaces

(long post bc im a yapper & idk how to be brief)

this is just my opinion, but as someone in an osdd system, i feel like theres no real way to go "this only applies to disordered systems and non-disordered systems could never hope to understand it so get out of here because this is not by/about/for you" etc.

on a base level, i get why you would want to have different spaces to discuss your experience with the disorder and its symptoms. and i agree that we need those spaces. i WANT to talk about those things, and i do! but the "didosdd community"... does not do that. if they did, i dont think wed be having this conversation.

instead, its like theyre trying to make a space for themselves, but instead of founding it on shared experiences like they should (for instance: general plurality or how to deal with dissociation and the like), theyre founding it on the distress they go through (caused by their symptoms) and then acting like plurality is the reason for those symptoms, instead of just... treating it like separate issues. like sure, you might be plural because of your trauma, but your didosdd is your trauma response and why you have those symptoms, not the plurality in and of itself. there are non-systems who dissociate or who have amnesia, and the inverse is true. its a gray area.

but truthfully, they dont care for any of that. all they know is that theyre miserable, and they want to stay miserable.

not counting the autism (cuz its a special case), ive got two other major Big Bad disorders that make my life hell: ocd and avpd. and in all of these communities, i see the same exact thing every time. we never talk about how we can live life happily with these disorders or heal. i dont hear about ocd successes, or how someone overcame their avpd and carved a life out for themself. i hear about the struggles, and how it sucks, and the way it ruins your life.

because when you are REALLY deep into these disorders, you are pretty hopeless. i know and ive been there. the didosdd community likes to bond on their suffering, because suffering people attract other suffering people. its a cycle: the more you talk about suffering the worse you feel, and you look for comfort in other suffering people but no healing actually happens. they (didosdd) cant imagine a life without suffering-- and, important distinction: they mistake their plurality for the reason they suffer.

which, yes. you can suffer with plurality. it isnt all sunshine and rainbows. its hard! youre allowed to not like it or hate it even! but what im trying to say is that the point of therapy, generally, is to learn to live with your symptoms. mental illness cannot ever be fully healed, it is a product of your brain being abnormal, and no, even integration wont cure you. but they dont seem to get that? they think of themselves as fractured/broken/wrong somehow, their plurality is "proof" of that, and then cry about how awful didosdd is and 'why would someone ever want this?'

look, i get it. i HAVE didosdd. i know it sucks. i know its hard. its awful and i hate it. but i dont hate being plural. i dont hate my alters. we are more functional this way than we would be if we were a singlet. and, most importantly, being a system outside of your didosdd symptoms is important and valuable. your symptoms are just... the disorder itself. not the plurality. they just coexist.

because there will come a day very soon where our system no longer suffers from our symptoms to a degree that we will no longer fit under the didosdd criteria. because you can truly minimize those symptoms, function as a unit, and you wont need the label anymore. because didosdd is not "youre plural and it sucks". its "everything sucks, and youre plural in addition to it sucking". youll most likely still be plural, but it wont suck anymore.

and in all of my experiences with osdd/did/whatever we have--dissociation, a little amnesia, distress, all the works-- these are all things that non-disordered systems can have experience with. theres a ton of overlap. i dont feel like, on a fundamental level, theres really any huge difference between us (disordered) and them (non-).

yet the didosdd community seems to like to gatekeep those symptoms? which doesnt make sense either. ive never met a non-disordered system that didnt struggle in some way with a different mental illness, and those things i mentioned above are all really common symptoms of other disorders, like autism, adhd, personality disorders, (c)ptsd......

but most of all, i think a lot of didosdd systems tend to think of non-disordered systems --whether they (claim to) support them or not-- as this like, Magical Separate Thing with No Common Ground to them...?

like, you dont think endos had to go through a discovery period? you dont think theyve been judged or abused or outcast for their plurality? you dont think theyve ever struggled with switching, or communication, or headspace, or alter roles? you dont think theyve never felt invalid or unreal or like they were broken? hell, they probably feel that MORE than we (didosdd) do because of how you guys treat them!

and if the goal of having separate spaces was to talk about your symptoms and help each other cope with your stigmatized disorder (again: a very valid thing to do) like they claim to do... well, you certainly dont do that.

yall are too busy fighting over whos faking, and basing your existence on a disorder. and speaking from years of experience: basing your existence on a disorder makes for a very miserable life.

because, put it this way-- ive never met an endo/supporter that i didnt generally agree with and feel respected by. sure, i dont understand most of them, but the more they talk about their experiences the more i go "oh hey, we do that too! we arent so different after all." they listen to me. i listen to them. we help each other, and share advice on how to become functional units. we share the good and the bad. we understand we are more than a disorder. we are a community!

but on the other hand, i have met a lot of sysmeds who (as the name implies) think our existence is purely medical, reduce us down to our symptoms, and treat us like broken fragments instead of like actual living breathing people.

that isnt getting over your disorder, or learning to cope with it. thats forming an identity around your pain. and ive tried that and i nearly died from it, and im gonna tell you this: it doesnt fucking fix you. it doesnt make your symptoms better, it doesnt make you happy, it doesnt make you functional. it only makes you sad and bitter and suicidal. if you genuinely believe youre broken, then you are. and you will stay broken until you heal, which you cant do if youre surrounded by other miserable broken people.

respectability politics 101: society thinks youre broken for being plural. if you agree with them, there is no way to challenge the stigma of your disorder. you wont improve, or find people who accept you. they have no reason to-- after all, youre a freak, right? and youll stay the same. sad, bitter, broken.

[jsms01]

5 ways to change your mindset

When we’re struggling with our weight, it can feel like some things are out of our control – from the foods we eat to the everyday challenges that steer us away from making slimming-friendly choices. As experts in the psychology of weight loss, Slimming World will empower you to take back control and build new healthy habits that last.  Here, five inspirational slimmers share how being a member has helped them change their mindset around food and drink, and spurred them on to lasting success. Discover our latest special offers here

Yes you can… understand yourself as a slimmer

There are many reasons why we might struggle to lose weight. Some of them are known to us – like the foods we eat. Others might be just outside of our awareness. At Slimming World, we’ll help you uncover the deeper psychological barriers to your success, and then arm you with the tools to overcome them, so that you can develop healthier new grooves. MORE ON THE BLOG: 9 easy ways to make healthy habits stick

The support of her Slimming World Consultant helped Laura Allen understand the link between her emotions and her secret-eating habit… “I’d always been a big emotional eater and I used food as both a comfort and a reward, often eating in private so that my family wouldn’t know. When I joined Slimming World, it was such a relief to open up about my secret eating, and my group helped me to understand and gradually break the habit without ever feeling deprived. I finally have some control over my eating. Before, I’d pick my way through the day, snacking on crisps and chocolates and finishing with a takeaway. Now I cook my meals from scratch, making delicious Slimming World versions of my favourite recipes, like chicken tikka masala.” Read Laura’s full story here

Yes you can… stop negative self-talk

We’re much more likely to make healthy choices when we feel good about ourselves. However, that’s easier said than done, especially if we’ve fallen into the habit of putting ourselves down. Surrounding yourself with positive people who understand and genuinely care about you is vital when it comes to silencing that inner critic. In fact, our research found that 91% of our members feel more positive about themselves since joining Slimming World. MORE ON THE BLOG: The surprising stats that prove kindness is key to weight loss

Years of abuse about her weight had left Harriet Peacock feeling trapped in a cycle of negative self-criticism. But when she joined Slimming World, she found the acceptance she’d been looking for – and went on to lose a staggering 20st. “Over the years, I’d tried pretty much every diet going. They never worked and would usually end in a binge-eating session because I was so hungry, and with me branding myself as a failure who was destined to be overweight and miserable forever.  Group taught me that I was worthy of happiness and it gave me back my confidence. Apart from family and close friends, my fellow members were the first people who made me feel accepted. They just got it, were never judgemental and, as the weight came off, they cheered me on every step of the way.” Read Harriet’s full story here

Yes you can… fit changes around your lifestyle

You’re more likely to stick to healthy habits when they slot into your everyday routine. Our Food Optimising eating plan is fully flexible, so it can easily work with your lifestyle, whether you’ve got a busy family life, a full-on job, a packed social calendar – or all three! MORE ON THE BLOG: How to personalise Food Optimising to you

Before he joined Slimming World, Matt Symons thought he’d have to give up his social life to lose weight. Then a question from his Consultant changed everything… “I used to meet my friends in the pub after work almost every night, catching up over food and drink – I could easily get through 10 pints, then stop for a kebab or pizza on the way home. My weight crept up and up, but it didn’t occur to me to change my lifestyle. Then, just before Christmas 2016, a metal dining chair buckled beneath me at a friend’s house party. I joined Slimming World a week later. In one session, I talked about how I’d been avoiding the pub because I was worried I’d just regain all the weight as soon as I started socialising again. When my Consultant, Steven, asked me if I could change the way my social life was set up, it was a revelation. Everyone chipped in with ideas for nights out, and I started to meet up with my new friends from group for coffee dates and cinema trips. I also discovered that I really enjoyed tenpin bowling, and we started going for regular games. I was having a great time – without feeling hungover and low the following morning!” Read Matt’s full story here

Yes you can… get support on your terms

There’s no telling how or when life will throw up challenges to your weight loss. That’s why you’ll find lots of ways to connect with the Slimming World Community. Many of our Consultants have closed Facebook groups, where members can swap ideas, celebrate successes and help each other stay on track between groups. Plus, members enjoy exclusive 24/7 access to our app, with its 1,900 recipes, behaviour-changing tools, real-life success stories, progress tracking and the Slimming World barcode scanner, for support wherever you are and whenever you need us.  MORE ON THE BLOG: All about our barcode scanner

Member Charlie Morgan found the app an invaluable lifeline… “I downloaded the app immediately after signing up. On my first trip to the supermarket as a member, I used the Slimming World barcode scanner on my phone to check the Syns on anything I wasn’t sure about. I also checked the app if I needed a reminder about the basics of Food Optimising. In my first week, I was surprised by just how much I could eat on the plan – and even more surprised when I lost 5lbs!  That gave me the confidence to be a bit more adventurous the following week, so I looked up some of our favourite dishes and used the app to find slimming versions. My girlfriend is vegetarian, and we found lots of recipes that could work for both of us – we’d cook the vegetarian version and I’d add meat to my portion at the end.’’ Read Charlie’s full story here

Yes you can… let go of guilt and shame

These emotions are two of the most common stoppers to our weight loss success. Learning to shed the burden of them is a change most of us could benefit from making, and that starts with finding an environment where you feel safe and free from judgement – which is exactly what you’ll find in our groups and our online Community. MORE ON THE BLOG: Discover how Slimming World can set you free from guilt

A fear of failure meant Sophie Ratcliffe hid her slimming goals. By sharing her journey with other Slimming World members, she finally found the support she needed to succeed. “Before joining Slimming World, I never told anyone when I was trying to lose weight, as I was sure I wouldn’t succeed. My son was being bullied at school because of my weight, which made me feel so guilty, but I had no idea how to change things. It was September 2021 when I first walked through Slimming World’s doors. At 24st, I felt embarrassed by my size, but no-one made me feel self-conscious. The other members were such a lovely bunch, I instantly knew I was safe and that they wouldn’t be judging me. I left the session feeling hopeful for the first time in ages.” Read Sophie’s full story here If you’re looking for lasting weight loss, you’ll find a world of support waiting at your local Slimming World group or in our vibrant online Community. We’d love to welcome you!

Free 7-day menu

Would you love a taste of the Food Optimising plan? Enter your email address below to receive a full week of delicious Food Optimising recipes, as well as our regular newsletter packed with more Slimming World food, inspiring member transformations and exciting special offers.  Source link Read the full article

[thelandscapingemployeetrap]

How To "LET GO" Of Fear and Vibrate Abundance | Quantum Biology

Sometimes you may feel that life is hopeless. This is because you were making difficult decisions and choosing tough choices.  It's challenging when you go through those hard things and just breathe and be present with them. What will make you happy? Chasing all your dreams and putting yourself in misery because all you are pursuing is success and money, thinking it will make you happy? Well, it might make you happy, but you might end up miserable if you're trading your life to get it. 

So I hope you are leaning toward an abundance of love, peace, prosperity, and well-being. If you are going through hard times, I urge you not to resist. Instead, try to remain very present at that time and find your inner peace. I encourage you today to listen to today’s episode. My focus is on you. I care about your life. I care about your well-being.  I want to see you succeed. 

“But how can you get to the point where you are? You let go of all that stuff, and then you become fun. And you say, you know, it's okay.”

 -  Keith Kalfas

Why do you have to listen to today's episode.

  1:35 -  “I want to say that you're not alone. There's an inner candle flame that never flickers. And that is your hope.”   

You are not alone. Everything might not turn out okay, but you are your strength. Love yourself again. Appreciate life and everything that surrounds you. 

6:04 - “You don't need to go through any more dramatic or traumatic experiences; you've already been through all that shit. And now is the time for you to finally just walk into your destiny.”

Let go and accept what you have learned on this journey. Upgrade your identity based on what you discovered. Be present with the life that you have. 

10:54 - “There's a part of the consciousness when you dream, the superconscious, and the subconscious. When you feel safe, your nervous system relaxes and goes into a place where the sympathetic nervous system relaxes. See that your muscles will unconsciously tense up, and you have to consciously relax them habitually.”

  Set a time to relax and let go of your fear. Scientifically, your consciousness rests and moves back into a sine wave. Your consciousness will be perfectly balanced in harmony. Thus it will be easier to think more straightly. 

18:51 -  “Your imagination is the highest level of intelligence. Einstein even said you have implementation. Then you have unification which is managing other people's higher state of consciousness to do leveraged physical work for tons of people, then you have the highest, which is communication. 

There is only one level that can surpass all others: imagination. As you relax and allow yourself to enter a flow state, you will be able to see and experience beautiful ideas and enthusiasm. However, although the mind can conceive and believe it can achieve, you must believe it.

Key Takeaways

   “You're not alone. There's an inner candle flame that never flickers. And that is your hope, and that everything's gonna be okay. It's funny how Jordan Peterson's once said, and he goes, No, everything's not gonna be okay. Right? But I was gonna say that, have a love affair with yourself. That sounds weird, right? I'm saying, fall in love with yourself again and have the mindset of a beginner.”

“Just start applying what you've learned and what you know in your heart to be true. And upgrade your identity. And upgrading your identity might just be letting go. And just being present with the life that you have.” 

“The highest level of all is imagination. That's where you imagine, so if you're stuck all the time in survival mode, you actually can't access the states of consciousness that are in imagination. If you can allow yourself to relax and go into a flow state, It is beautiful ideas and enthusiasm, and you become enthusiastic, which means that God within it flows. And then you get into this flow state.”

  Connect with Keith  

Facebook

Instagram 

YouTube

LinkedIn

  Resources/People Mentioned:

My Website: Official Site Keith Kalfas

My Podcast Page: The UNTRAPPED Podcast

Eckhart Tolle's The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment

Wayne W. Dyer’s Books on Audible.com

Dr. David R. Hawkin's  Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender and Power vs. Force

Wayne W. Dryer's The Power of Awakening: Mindfulness Practices and Spiritual Tools to Transform Your Life

Ken Wilber’s Kosmic Consciousness and The One Two Three of God 

Tami Simon’s Sounds True

David Cameron Gikandi’s A Happy Pocket Full of Money

Get a Free Trial of JOBBER Software & save 20% off your first 6 months. Grow Your Business With Jobber (getjobber.com)

Try Jill's office today and get a $25 discount when you say or type untrapped. Click here to go to Jill's office.com. 

Maximize your production in the field with Ballard Products. Don’t forget to use Keith’s promo code “Keith 10” and save 10% off anything in the online store.

Please leave us a well-written, positive 5-star review if you liked the show. You may click here

  Check out this episode!

[studywith-laura]

An Honest Review of University: From a Third Year Student

I’ve recently completed three years of study at the University of Nottingham and I can confidently say that the University experience is one like no other I’ve ever had. Between balancing the chaos of new-found friendships and the demanding workload of studying at a Russel group University, I’ve certainly been on quite the learning curve. There’s some things that you just cant be prepared for before you begin your university journey, but I hope to highlight some of the realities of University living that they don’t tell you when you pick up your brochure on the Open Day.

Now some of these reviews of my University experience will be specific to the University of Nottingham, so hopefully these can be helpful to any of you thinking specifically of studying at this University. Others will be more general so will hopefully be helpful to a whole range of people who are starting their University journey!

Campus Life:

Having the opportunity to live on campus, especially one as beautiful as that of UoN, made my first year of Uni even more special. I lived in Lenton and Wortley hall during my first year of University and I couldn’t have had a more positive experience. Living in halls gives you the perfect opportunity to meet lots of people as soon as you arrive at your accommodation, and I was lucky that this was where the majority of my close friendships at University began. Being surrounded by so many new people can be overwhelming, but for me this was nothing but a positive experience and I found friends I know I’ll have for life. It’s amazing how quickly friendships can form and blossom when you start eating every meal together, as we did in catered halls. Now this wouldn’t be a fair review if I didn’t tell you about the realities of mass catering, which often means that Friday night dinner is the leftovers from Thursday night rebranded as ‘Chef’s Special’. So be prepared for spending more money than you budgeted for on food from the takeaway when you just can’t take another night of soggy vegetables and Muller Corners.

Despite a less than luxury experience with being cooked for during my first year of University, this gave me the opportunity to adapt to living alone in a new city without being thrown completely in the deep end with having to learn to cook at the same time, something I didn’t have to worry about until I moved into a shared house in second year. One other downside of living in catered halls however is how expensive it can be – I lived in an en-suite room, and being catered for, this made living costs for first year very expensive. This isn’t something I regret however – it made settling into University much easier for me and meant that I didn’t have to worry about sharing my private space with people I wasn’t yet comfortable with. I could choose these people for myself and decide who I wanted to share with in second year!

Living directly on campus also makes attending lectures and seminars much easier (yes, I did actually attend my lectures in first year, despite my Instagram suggesting otherwise). Living so close to your lecture theatres just makes life so much more convenient, and means you can risk sleeping in a bit later if you had one too many drinks at the pub the night before.

Social Life

I’ve been lucky in that I quickly found a group of people who I really got on well with upon moving to University, so I soon had people who I was hanging out with regularly. I’ve also found that my social circle has expanded throughout my time at University, so don’t worry if you don’t find your ‘people’ straight away, there’s plenty of people who you just haven’t met yet who you’re bound to click with! It’s easy to make friends at University, whether that’s through shared accommodation, your course or a society, there’s always plenty of people who are eager to make new friends. Living in a city also makes for a great social life, as there’s countless bars and brunch cafes which make for easy bonding with your new-found friends.

Although the experience of living with your friends is an exciting one and something you’re unlikely to experience anywhere else, it can at times be draining, as it becomes hard to say no to another free club night (it did for me, anyway). So, make sure that while you’re putting yourself out there and trying new things, that you’re also taking time for yourself and protecting your own mental health. The pub can wait!

Studying

I’m someone who has always naturally enjoyed learning and studying so University was the perfect next step for me after A levels. I study Biology which has no doubt been demanding and often very stressful. Studying at university level is no joke, and the workload can soon get on top of you if you let it. It’s important that while you have fun and make the most of your time, you actually remember the reason you came there in the first place – to get a degree! I think the reason why students garner such a reputation for being heavy drinkers and partiers is that it’s a good way to blow off steam after submitting a 3000 word essay which consumed all of your life for the past month!

I can truly say I have enjoyed my course, for the most part anyway. There’s bound to be modules which you just don’t like, but you have to suck it up and push through for the sake of the ones you do enjoy. I think it’s really important that you choose a course you truly enjoy, otherwise you’re just going to become miserable, as no one wants to write a 7000-word dissertation on a topic they’re not interested in.

Studying at University has been different to any other level of study I’ve ever taken, and it requires the special skill of being able to absorb and understand a vast amount of content in a shorter time space than ever before. This is challenging, but you easily adapt – you have to! The constant testing and coursework deadlines are rigorous, but they give you the opportunity to learn and become specialised in your field to a greater standard.

House Sharing

The best part of University for me was getting to share a house with my new friends, as we attempted to navigate the adult world together. While there will inevitably be arguments over who isn’t cleaning the kitchen enough or whose turn it is to hoover the stairs, the experience comes with the joy of spending everyday with people who you know you get along well with. Late night deep chats and movie nights in the living room become the new norm, and having your friends by your side make completing your Uni work much more enjoyable than if you were stuck in your room by yourself. I shared the same house with my friends during both second and third year, which brought us incredibly close, and allowed us to form unbreakable bonds. I look back on these days as the best days of University, as you have complete freedom and finally start to feel like a proper adult, while still getting to have fun with your friends. I must stress that finding the right people to live with is essential, as you’ll be spending everyday with these people, so make sure you make the right choice! And remember that living with other people means there will be a whole mix of opinions on how things should work and everyone will be dealing with something different, so you have to learn to adapt to the changing needs of other people, while respecting your own boundaries.

 My university experience is not yet complete, as I start my final year in September to complete my Masters. However, I hope that my experiences from the past 3 years can be helpful to those who are thinking of starting University or have already started their journey and are looking for some advice!

[chasinggfreedom]

Post #1 -- On: Literally No One Cares

So I think this is actually a really good topic to cover to preface this— it is the underlying premise that I have accepted over the years that has opened up a world of new possibilities, including the creation of this blog. Let me explain what this means.

Back when I was in high school, I remember some of my lowest moments were due to the fact that I felt as though no one truly cared about me. I would be having a bad day, but then I was so hung up over the fact that none of my friends seemed to even notice that I made it even worse. This, of course, would lead me down rabbit holes of seemingly never-ending self pity. I would constantly be reaching out for reassurance that they did in fact care about me. With that, I would make myself believe it, and all was well. But then this would happen repeatedly, and I was once again doubting everything I had been told.

The truth is, most of my friends back then did care about me. They just didn't care about me the way I wanted them to. But being cared for the way I wanted to promoted this extreme form of victimization — the idea that everyone had to care about everything I was dealing with because  all my problems were somehow so unique and profound. Notice where this is going? This is the epitome of entitlement, the mindset where you believe you or your problems are so great/terrible that you deserve special treatment. When most people think about what it means to be entitled, we oftentimes think of a privileged person who holds and thinks of themselves so much higher than everybody. On the other hand, there are those who victimizes themselves to the extent that they view themselves lower than everyone else. While these might appear as completely difference concepts, they are the two sides to the same coin. Both of these mindsets arrive at the same conclusion: I'm special.* 

It took me couple years, but I slowly began to realize that no one cared as much as I wanted, or thought they did. Of course, in the beginning this was devastating for me to accept. But over time, it turned into one of the most liberating thing I could have done for myself.

Once you realize that literally no one cares (unless they're weirdly obsessed with you), you stop worrying so much about what you're doing for others and focus on what you're doing for yourself. No one really cares about the shit I'm spouting on this blog. No one cares about what I'm eating for dinner tonight. No one cares that I'm the only girl in the free weights part of the gym. No one cares about my next post on Instagram. If no one cares, why should you? It is imperative that I clarify that this question here is not asking, "Why should you care to do anything then?", but rather "Why should you care what others think?" The takeaway here is not that no one cares, so you should live a life doing nothing. While you absolutely could do that, doesn't mean you should. The liberation gained from these realizations should uplift you to new heights, rather than drag you down even further.

This might sound easy on paper, but I should probably also address what all of our greatest concerns are. "What if people judge me? What will they think of me?" While I have already established that no one really cares what we do, there is a distinction to be made between "care" and "judge". Unfortunately, as long as we are existing, we will always be subject to judgement. As long as our minds are capable of perception, they are making judgements. Why do we place such emphasis on the importance of a first impression? We don't like to say it, but from the moment we meet people for the first time, we are already making judgements about them. What we really mean to say whenever we tell someone "We're not judging you," is "We're not judging you aloud." When someone describes themselves as a non-judgmental person, what they really mean is that they've been able to control how their judgement manifests. It always comes out one way or another. It may be in the form of talking behind their back, choosing to see them again, choosing to never see them again, or treating them amicably. There are, understandably, several negative connotations surrounding the word "judgement.” For instance, when we choose to talk behind someone's back, we've decided that there's a certain trait that we don't like, but on the contrary, when we choose to treat someone as a friend, we've judged that there are traits about them that we do like. It's an inherent part of our human nature, and in the past it's probably saved our asses more often than not. So what does this mean for the way we carry ourselves? The point I'm trying to make here, is that none of us are, or ever will be, impervious to judgement, or judging. With this in mind, we should move forward knowing that if it's going to happen anyways, why would you limit yourself doing something that makes you miserable? If are you are living your life as you please, you are happy, and people decide to judge you negatively, I ask that you consider what this might say about them instead of you. For if you are to live out your life basing your worth on what others think of you, rather than creating your own life, you’re effectively letting the world create your life for you. “Indeed, to the extent that your actions and pursuits are your responses to the will and the approval of other people, you are the very opposite of a proud person, for you are the slave of others. A willing slave, to be sure--but a slave, still.”* Casting aside the standards of other is not something that will come easy, as it’s something we’ve been trained to do since birth, as well as requiring us to set our own standards for ourselves to live by. Life is difficult, and creating your own life is even more so, but attaining your own approval is the greatest, and the only incentive I have to offer you. 

I used to be so afraid of talking about my thoughts, posting my opinions, and worrying about what people might think of me. Doing a project like this would have been a tragedy to 16-year old me. However, in our modern day era of technology, where social media perpetuates the ideal of the 'perfect life' during our best moments, we've all curated this idea that our lives should be happy and perfect all the time. We all know that this is not true, yet we can't seem to stop. I believe that now, more than ever, that transparency online is crucial to our well being. I will admit I don't have a solution to all the consequences of what technology has created, nor do I think that starting this project will really solve anything. But as I have said (see: about), that is not the purpose of this project. This project is the byproduct of me pushing my limits one step further. I have already gotten comfortable with the fact that the things no one cares about me are only a minor part of my identity; sharing my thoughts openly is now subjecting a significant part of who I am to the same treatment. To conclude what this means for you, living a life without worrying about what others might think of you will give you confidence, independence, and most importantly, freedom. And as you know, that's what this whole thing is about.

*Manson, Mark. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life. , 2016. Print.

*Taylor, Richard. Restoring Pride: The Lost Virtue of Our Age. , 1995. Print.

[taeguboi]

BTS as Boyfriends [HC]

Request:  ‘bts as boyfriends? ☺’

There’s kind of a story in each? Idk, hope you enjoy!

Warning: some nsfw mentions

Rap Monster

You fall for his intelligence and humour

He falls for your shyness around him

You finally tell a friend out loud about your crush on him

unaware that he’s nearby and within hearing distance

So he asks you out on a date

he doesn’t expect for you to want more than the one date

so you get the impression afterwards that it meant nothing to him

you try to move on

he hates watching someone else being so close to you

Everything changes;

he interrupts your conversation, not caring to be rude

“I can’t stand it anymore”

*intense kiss* *everybody cheers, huzzah!* 

Learning is suddenly more fun

school was a drag back in the day

but his stories capture your attention

You just let him sit talking for hours about a book he just read

Matching jumpers

snuggy snug snug

winter becomes more enjoyable

it’s freezing and miserable outside but

you’re sat by the fire with joonie

well laid on the couch by the fire falling asleep

as he reads you a bedtime story hahaha

you get through books together at the same time and it’s magical

there’s always something to talk about

whether it’s a debate / discussion about a book

or about something really little like 

how you each prefer something and why

and you appreciate the little differences 

but you also appreciate how you change and shape each other into better rounded human beings

excuses to be skinshippy with you

*grabs your butt*

“it looked cold”

okay I didn’t say they were good excuses...

Everyone thinks he’s this confident, outgoing guy

but when you’re around he’s all cutesy and always bumping into things

He gets so distracted by you

and he really does try not to perv on you

like he really tries

but his thoughts just come out in one big list of adjectives 

that progressively get a little nsfw

“How do I look Joonie?”

“Damn, you’re gorgeous, you’re beautiful, you’re sexy...”

*winks*

Sex isn’t limited to the bedroom

just as you think you’re seeing shy squishy joonie

he takes you into a storage cupboard mid-party

and wow

you swear it’s the best you’ve ever had in your life

but then you find you keep saying that yo yourself

he’s so attentive

it’s all about you

he doesn’t mind if you focus on him later but

it’s more fun when you put just as much attention in at the same time

because your boy gets FLUSTERED

he’s so cool until you touch him just right...

but anyway

back to fluffy content

oops

Namjoon shows you the world

all without travelling

he’s so well educated

so cultured

the works

he’s the best teacher you never asked for

everything is fun

everything is interesting

everything is awesome

and all of this is going to last a lifetime

Jin

He only has eyes for you

way before you become an item

Purposely awkward af when you’re in a conversation with someone who could be a threat

to put them off

Always asking about your well being

He’s just happy that you’re happy

getting to talk to you in the first place makes his day

but then when he asks how you are and you respond with a smile

that really hits the feels 

At first he’s so smooth

there’s nothing flawed about him

Then you find out what a dork he is

squeaky laughter

bad jokes

sorta clumsy, even

but he’s still perfect 

and still a gentleman

His friends have never seen him laugh so often in his life

you make him look even more radiant

you’re the funniest person to him

even though you never really had yourself down as ‘comedian’

he loves your type of humour

Making breakfast together

back hugs

it’s one of those little things in life

and one of those things that make you miss him more when you’re apart

One night a week is definitely date night

he never misses it or forgets

He makes everything special

even the really little anniversaries / milestones

ones you didn’t even realises were a cause for celebration

“Chocolates? Whatever for?”

“It’s been half a year since we made us public”

“Aw, Jin... You realize people don’t usually get gifts for things like that?”

“I just... I wanted to”

The most generous man

all he needs is that you return the love

and remind him of everything you love about him

especially in bed

he’s in charge

but it’s only because he likes to take care of you

he may not be as daring as some of the other members

but every inch of the house has been covered

very intimate, passionate lover

the love just makes it more special

as well as more sensual for him 

emotion is everything

and not a day goes by that he doesn’t think of you with adoration

he brings you back things from a normal food shopping trip

because he was thinking of you

he tries not to make his social media all about you

but at least 50% ends up being that

it works to his advantage though

because girls are still after him

and then that selfie he posted yesterday sends them the message 

to back off

he’s so perfect

that none of your estranged school ‘mates’ are having any of it

and after hearing this

he invades your snapchat

selfie after selfie after selfie whilst you’re asleep

and whilst you’re not sure you appreciate that one shot of you being asleep

it shuts all the haters right up

and now they’re probably crying 

oh well

he is proud to show you off

“hey everyone! look at this amazing thing my girlfriend/boyfriend did!”

he’ll do anything to make you laugh

anything

if you’re having a bad day then that just won’t do

he’s taking you out

or he’s treating you for a night in

and he’s definitely treating you to his dad jokes

and then you’re in stitches

Jin makes you forget everything that sucks about life

Suga

Too shy to start talking to you

but somehow you exchange numbers one day

So it becomes a heavily text-based friendship that you form

He has to be sure he won’t make a fool of himself

Actions are louder than words

he might not say much about how he feels about you

but there’s gestures every day

like how he brings you coffee to work

or how he offers to pay for food

you figure it out eventually

and you really like him to

but how to say it?...

so anyway, one day, you kiss

you know, casual

“so does this mean...?...”

yes

bam! you’re a couple!

You complete him

and he can’t imagine life without you

nights without you in his bed are lonely

People think he’s cold and indifferent

but you make him soft soft soft

like he’ll pretend not to be ticklish

oh but hahahahaha you find out he is

“Ah! Jagiyaaaa! Hahahahahah!”

Just hug him all the time

sometimes you complain about how you look

but he just smiles at you and you know what it means

Only you can stop him from over-working

he’s just sat at his laptop, eyebrows furrowed

talk dirty to him so he doesn’t go insane

don’t forget to wear his clothes

he loves watching you roam the house in an over sized shirt

those similarities are what he holds onto

if there’s no common ground, then what would be the point, huh?

sharing is caring

one headphone each on bus journeys

you can have some of his fries at the takeaway

big cocktail for you both to have on a night out

under the same blanket on colder days

he loves it when you unexpectedly touch him

drives him crazy

one minute it’s all innocent and lovey dovey

then your hand is on his dick and fuuuuck

too soon?

nah

the programme you were watching is forgotten about

so is all his sense of surroundings

the curtains are wide open and there you are pumping him up and down

and he doesn’t even notice or care

fuck he loves you

not just because of that obvs

but after your first time initiating something more sexual 

he does not stop thinking about you

like holy shit this is real

yippie

he loves your kisses

he can’t go a day without

well he can but it’s torture

when aren’t his hands on your waist?

and fuck he still can’t stop kissing you

not too much in public of course

but at home in mid conversation

after every sentence

until there’s just like half an hour silence 

and you’re smooching each other’s faces off

you’ll never feel short of love or attention with Yoongi

J-Hope

As soon as he notices you: personality turnaround

Cool, manly, swagger

not a precious easily shook bby at all

He’s kinda distracting

like you’re trying to work here, but

he’s too funny and handsome

and he knows it, even though he’s too modest to admit it

But then one day something moves abruptly

and he gets shook and it’s the cutest thing to you

but he’s so embarrassed 

he could just run away forever 

because he thinks he done fcked up

wrong!

“aw, cute” you respond

*dorky grin emerges on Hobi’s face*

*comes into work next day on a motorbike* 

[think j-dope era]

You make it clear that this doesn’t change your new impression of him

The typical ‘chase’ love story

He likes you but you take a while to give him the time of day to make sure he’s worth it

and he is worth it

there’s like a solid week where he brings you something everyday

and you don’t want this poor boy emptying his wallet so fast

so you give in to how you feel

“okay, okay! I’ll go on a date with you”

but you insist on paying the bill to make up for his troubles

but he won’t have it

you eventually agree to split the bill

and that starts the foundations for

a completely equal relationship

what you give is what you get

a problem shared is a problem halved

and all the other cliches about sharing

excitable cutie pie

“Y/n! Y/n! Y/n!”

Yeah, he’s kind of gathered that he can’t hide his true self from you

He wants to discover the world with you

he takes risks and tries new things for you

he tries to be braver than he really is

“Let’s go on the rollercoaster y/n!”

“Are you sure Hobi? You screamed so much last time...”

“Well, yeah... 

“... That was my first time...

“... and I didn’t know for sure if it was safe...”

sure hobi, sure

The best team

your respective skills combined are all powerful

you can solve any problem together

you become that couple that are great at creating other couples

so many couples dates come out of it

it’s because you’re good at learning people’s true personalities fast

and he’s the best persuader

oh and he’s great at suggesting places to go

everyone enjoys the company of both of you

if only one of you can attend something

everyone asks about the other

you come as a package

“we” instead of “I” comes out in sentences a lot

but it’s not that either of you are too clingy

you both genuinely enjoy each other’s company for extended periods of time

like one day it’ll be like

“it’s the weekend and a bit rubbish weather to go do anything so d’ya wanna come over for the afternoon to watch some movies?”

and then next thing you know

it’s Friday next week

and you’ve been there all this time

whoops

Tries to hide when he’s in the mood at a bad time

but he talks slow and deep without meaning to

so he can never hide from you

and whilst he doesn’t have to tell you he’s turned on

you have your little methods of making him say it aloud

like when you grab his thigh

and then he’s like

“oh fuck I need you”

y/n at your service hobi...

you’re so good to him

that bless his soul

he always says ‘thank you’ afterwards

“you don’t need to thank me Hobi”

“but that was great”

bless

everything is still special as the relationship progresses

and whilst he’s always loved referring to you as his girlfriend / boyfriend

he loves it even more when he gets to say ‘fiance’

fairy tale wedding

he’s like a prince

honeymoon at disney world

because it’s everything your relationship stands for

the rides where Hobi takes risks for you

the fairy tale like love for each other

you even each go for the makeover package one day

it’s probably cringe to a lot of people

but you’re his wife / husband now so he doesn’t care

Jimin

Admires you from a distance

he hates how his friends can so easily talk to you

he wants to be more like them, so he tries hard

Finally, he plucks up the courage to initiate and engage in a proper conversation

“Hey” with a shy smile

Suddenly you become besties

there’s something about Jimin you trust deeply in

He can’t stop smiling around you

you can’t stop smiling around him

eventually you both figure it out

At first, his jaw is aching from all the smiling

he eventually builds up that stamina though

“You’re so pretty”

random compliments for days

giggly couple

you make each other smile too much

your relationship kind of brings him out of his shell

but he will probably always be shy chimchim

and you’re both low key in public

but everyone can see how you look at each other

You’re surprised at how chatty he gets under the covers

because of how shy he usually is

but the bedroom is a totally different story!

“you like that?”

“am I treating you good honey?”

pure fucking sin

like  w h e r e  d i d  t h i s  s i d e  o f  m y  c h i m c h i m  c o m e  f r o m

you call him out on it after a few times

and he’s just like

“what? I was just really getting into it”

and he somehow says that with such innocence

that you’d think he was talking about just a song or something

his voice is music to your ears

seeing ‘I love you’ in a text just isn’t the same

I mean, of course it still means a lot

but you get goosebumps when he says it face to face

adventures in town for hours

it doesn’t matter if no one has money

it’s the quality time that counts

and there are still some free things to enjoy

window shopping and speculating the future

museums

sightseeing

checking out buskers

he doesn’t even dress up particularly for those days

but you’re still impressed

when he’s running about town 

you just admire his sweater paws

or he’s reaching up for something in a shop 

and a bit of hip shows 

and you admire how beautiful his skin tone is

you end up scrimping together like 50p for a second hand film

and it’s rubbish

but it doesn’t matter

you can make your own fun anyway

I’m not saying no one ever has money

the point is that you don’t need it to have a good time together

He’s so glad he plucked up the courage that day way back when to talk to you

V

Doesn’t beat around the bush

Knows instantly that he has a crush

allows a suitable period of time in which he can get to know you

Asks you out on a date when the time is right

Not afraid to flirt and be a dork

says the most random things

“have you ever thought about what makes a krabby patty?”

I have lots of theories about this but not the right place 

and he’s so random

but it only draws you in more

because he’s intriguing

slightly mysterious even

but there’s one he’s crystal clear on

“I really like you y/n”

“I really like you too”

yes, it’s actually as simple as that

He is the most fun boyfriend EVER

it helps that he learned so much about you at the beginning

surprise day trips 

little games he’s created

as well as existing games

he makes bets that he knows he will lose

because he wants to treat you

“I bet you won’t find me within 5 minutes in a game of hide and seek!”

“You’re on!”

“Loser has to cook dinner!”

and then he chooses a really bad hiding place

like under a glass table 

or behind curtains that don’t reach the ground

and then it turns out the fridge is already choc-a-bloc

sometimes you worry he’s too thoughtful

like that time he skipped something important 

just to see you when you were sick

or when he gives you his jacket when it’s freezing cold

but of course you appreciate it

He’s not afraid to flaunt your relationship

costume party? you have to dress up; 

he insists you’re gonna be the best dressed couple there

Never forget how special you are

he’s saved himself for you

he always wanted to wait for the right person

and he was going to wait til marriage

but realises that is perhaps outdated

and he feels way too much for you for this not to be genuine

and you show it back too, more than enough for reassurance

[you choose whether you’re showing him the way or if it’s new to you too]

it’s extremely intimate

doesn’t forget to tell you at least 5 times he loves you during

remind him he’s the one and he’ll be putty in your hands

loved up

sexed up

the first time quickly leads into the second third and fourth time

as you spend the entire day in your dressing gowns

it’s a true bonding experience

excuse the unintended pun

you will never feel unloved by tae tae

Jungkook

Shy but treats you like a friend

if he’s giving you witty comments and teasing you then

he definitely has a crush on you

Will fite you

Gaming marathon? You’re on!

all of it is a just quest to impress you though

and all of this happens often over time

and you begin to notice him more

and feel that he has the potential to be more than your friend

so yep, another gaming marathon

intense flirting

heck, he’s surprising himself big time

“what are you gonna do about it?” he says with a smirk

yet he isn’t surprised when 

he realises it’s because he’s gotten so comfortable around you

so back to what he said

this is where things get taken up a notch

so what are you gonna do about it?

“depends what you have in mind, kook”

and he knows with your tone that you mean

“either you bust my ass on this game right now or you drop that console and do something about this tension”

that bit is unspoken of course ^

he pauses the game

but he hasn’t let go of the console

he just looks at you 

you’re looking back at him trying not to hyperventilate

and then he goes for it

game forgotten about

“come here”

???

“y/n?”

you follow his instruction

this is new - a demanding jungkook

you like it really though

“now, I could be reading this wrong, but...”

*intense passionate kiss*

but afterwards

Still can’t look you in the eye

“Jungkook, you know you can make eye contact with me after...”

and then you pauses because oops you’re hanging with friends

“After WHAT y/n??”

and you’re both shook

“Jungkook?? What happened?!?”

you hang your heads down

and I think your mates assume you fucked or something

even though there was only a kiss

so no one mentions it 

because of your lack of response on their questioning back there

so you guys get the space you need 

to get your heads around what’s going on here

and actually nothing happens for a good while

the intense friendship continues

until one day

you’re at a party

and he can’t fucking take it anymore

*takes you by the hand to a bedroom*

ooh

then your friends are certain something is going on

when one of them catches you at the party leaving said room

and this is where they bug you both constantly

until you have to ask

“so... what’s going on here?”

“to tell you the truth y/n... I can’t stop thinking about you”

“I can’t stop thinking about you either”

*cutesy kiss*

*less cutesy kiss*

*intense make out*

*low key touching*

yep it’s happening again whoops

so less of the hanky panky talk

til later that is

it’s one of those “they finally got together” things

everyone deep down thought you’d make a good match

it was hard to unsee

once you realise how similar you two are

but not too similar of course

there’d have been no intense banter without those differences

yeah you ‘argue’ a lot

but it’s just part of the passion you have for each other

yeah I’m not going for long without this talk lmao idk what my deal is today

Sensitive lil boy

Whisper in his ear and his boxers tighten

“Problem Jeonggukkie?”

“Yah jagi! That was mean...”

you know because you’re in public

and you know how easy it is to get to him in that way

“guys seriously get a room!”

again, whoops

You still do all those other things you did as mates

you’re basically mates but with a romantic aspect

‘dickhead’ means ‘you’re a loveable idiot’

‘yeah right’ means ‘you’re probably right but I’m not admitting that’

‘fuck’s sake’ means ‘that joke was terrible but really, I find it funny’

it’s like you don’t say what you mean

but you know what each other means

and there’s no overthinking about it

To an outsider, you guys seem extremely casual but this relationship means the world

Hope you guys enjoyed! Headcanon Masterlist

[canneloni-macaroni]

A 2000 word story about a lady inviting a very big guy over to her flat, so that he can sit on her. This was a commission for @chubnbass with his characters, if you’re interested in getting a commission for yourself then please let me know!!

There was an idle tap-tapping. Anna was sat, leaning over the breakfast bar in her kitchen, glaring at her smartphone. Impatiently, she reached it over, picked it up, checked she had signal, pouted upon confirming she did, then put it down again. This was taking way too long, her hot date was due to be here in five minutes time, and the food she had ordered was due to be here ten minutes ago. She grimaced and started tugging at her hair, one of her many stress responses she had picked up over the years. The knots in her hair were so tricky to get out that at this point she had just decided to roll with it, see if she could make it part of her look. On good days, it worked. She hoped this would be one of them.

The intercom to her flat started buzzing, and she looked up with a start. If this was her takeout, they usually called her phone first. If it was her date, she was hoping to have everything plated up and a bit more presentable. She dragged herself to her feet and starting scratching at her neck, another stress response, as she walked across the room to the intercom. “Hi, it’s Anna.” She said into the handset, frowning at who she remember the delivery driver to be. She had a fairly clear image of him in her mind.

“Hi, it’s Elliot. We were talking online?”

She held the phone away from herself and hissed “Shit,” before bringing the handset back. “Oh, Elliot!!” She replied, her croaky voice trying its best to sound friendly. “I’ll buzz you through, come on up.” She told him, before pushing the button to let him into the building. Anna hung up without letting him reply and starting pacing back and forth. “Shit, shit, shit.” She muttered to herself, “Everything should have been here by now.”

Realising that worrying about this wouldn’t do any good, she sat down in her chair and sulked. At least she felt cute, but the miserable expression on her face wasn’t helping that. Before too long, there was a knock at the door, and she forced herself to open the door to let Elliot in. She couldn’t help but raise her eyebrows as soon as she saw him though, he was even hotter in real life than in his picture.

Elliot was a fair bit taller than Anna, his features warm and friendly, with a cute little button nose, supported by a double chin. His brown hair was parted to the side, and was well-groomed too, judging by how clean his shave was. He was also, far, far wider than Anna, nearly filling up the door frame. His hefty frame strained at the buttons of his shirt, the seams of his jacket protested at his thick arms, his enormous belly having to be tucked into the waistband of his pants or else it would cover his knees, with thick thighs that threatened the very life of his slacks.

“Hello!!” He said, raising a hand as Anna welcomed him in. “Nice place you’ve got here, quite spacious.” He said as he looked around the flat. The kitchen and front room were connected, the bedroom and bathroom off to the back. “Where should I drop my coat?” He asked her, turning back around.

Anna didn’t realise she was staring at him for a moment, he was everything she wanted right now. She quickly snapped out of it when he looked back to her, and jolted upright. “Oh, sorry!!” She replied, her raspy voice cracking a little, “I’ll take that. Grab a seat by the breakfast bar.”

As she went to hang his coat up, she had to look back at him as he lumbered over to the counter-top. She couldn’t dare to dream, she couldn’t hope… could she? She looked anxiously, biting her lip… Yes!! He planted his enormous butt down on two stools, and even then there was a bit of overflow off the sides. That was a sign of good luck. She skipped back to the countertop.

“So, Elliot.” She said, positively beaming, “Tell me a bit about yourself.”

“Well, I-” He went to say something before he was interrupted by Anna’s phone ringing. She was immediately filled with fury, glaring at her smartphone with a look so intense she could have vaporised it with pure anger. She snatched it off the counter, before holding it up to her ear and trying to calm down.

“Han Dynasty?” The person on the other end replied, “I’m downstairs, could you come pick up your food?”

“Yeah. Yeah I’d love to.” She said, before immediately hanging up. Slipping her phone into her pocket and grabbing her keys, she looked to Elliot and smiled thinly. “Back in a minute.” She told him, “Check your phone or something, I’m gonna run downstairs.”

“Oh, I don’t have a smartphone-” He tried to tell her, but she was already out the door and in the lift heading downstairs. She muttered curses to herself as the elevator headed towards the ground floor, and in the foyer of her building she could see the delivery guy waiting for her.

“You’re late.” She grumbled, as she reached into her pocket to pull out a fistful of dollar bills.

“You’ll still order from us.” The delivery girl told her.

“You’re right.” Anna admitted, as she took the heavy bags of takeout from the delivery driver and went back upstairs.

Anna pushed the door to her apartment open, Elliot turned around to look around to her and smiled. He was leafing through a magazine, the lift up to the her flat took a lot more time than she expected. She walked in, waving one hand and sighing. “I uh, I cooked.” She told him. He laughed at her joke, at least that was appreciated.

Sitting alongside him, she reached into the bags and pulled out a few boxes of chinese food. Noodles, sweet and sour chicken, a healthy heap of fried prawns. “Anything you want?” She asked, placing the cartons on the side one-by-one, before reaching down and pulling out four sets of chopsticks. There ended up being 10 boxes of food and a few soft drinks, but Anna could only usually finish one or two by herself.

Anna took a box of chop suey noodles for herself, sliding a finger underneath the label and popping the lid up. With chopsticks in hand, she started eating straight from the carton with practiced alacrity. She kept sneaking glances to Elliot though, and was fairly astonished at how fast he was vanishing the food she had provided. The empty boxes were piling up, so many of them already on the counter-top next to her and she had barely finished her current box.

Being honest with herself, Anna was enjoying watching Elliot eat. He was ravenous, not wasting any time between mouthfuls. As soon as one box was nearing the bottom, he would reach over for another to pop that open. The free food was part of the offer she made to invite him over, and it seemed he was delighted in her choices of takeaway.

“D’you do this often?” Anna asked him, putting her chopsticks down for now in her empty carton. She was in awe of his stamina, how he was able to put that food away so quickly.

“Do what?” He asked, taking a pause from the food for a moment. “Meet up with people on the internet and let them buy me takeout?”

She nudged him on the shoulder. “You know what I mean.” She said, reaching for a can of soda and cracking it open. “Meet up with people on the internet and then sit on them.”

He laughed, nearly dropping his food. “Well, I guess it doesn’t happen that often. It’s hard to find somebody that will let me sit on them.”

“Really?” She sounded surprised, then paused for a moment. “I guess my perspective is a little shifted. Most big guys will usually agree if I pay them enough, so thanks for agreeing to do this after I just get you dinner.”

“Thanks for letting me do this, and for buying me dinner.” Elliot replied. He picked up a napkin and wiped his mouth, the last of the takeout taken care of. “You don’t have anything else to snack on, do you?”

She shook her head. “Later. Bedroom now. Pants off.”

Elliot wasn’t about to argue.

As she waited on her bed wearing her underwear, Anna prodded at her body. She always thought she was fairly scrawny, but sitting down like this she always got a little self-conscious about the flab on her midsection. Maybe it was her sedentary lifestyle and diet of junk food and breakfast cereal. “You ready yet?” She called out to Elliot, still getting changed in the other room.

“Yeah!!” He replied back, “Hang on.” He pushed the door open and walked through, his immense frame clothed in just a bathrobe. “You ready?”

Anna shuffled in position, hopping up and down on the bed. “This frame’s reinforced to withstand 1600 lbs of force. I should be fine.”

He disrobed. She knew he was probably wearing underwear, but his tremendous belly hung low and covered his entire groin, stopping just above his knees. The slightest step made his immense gut tremble for multiple seconds, but he was at least comfortable being mostly nude in front of Anna. His hips were wide enough to brush up against the door frame, and he put his hands up on the inside as if for emphasis. As he took a few steps forward, Anna really got an idea of how colossal he was. “Lie down, and stay right there.” He commanded her. Anna wasn’t about to complain.

Elliot mounted the bed, stradding Anna. Even though he was up on his knees to try and keep the weight off of her, she could feel his gut brush up along her body, from her legs, up to her belly, then resting on her chest. He hesitated for a moment, and she bit her bottom lip in anticipation. Any second now, she knew he was going to come down hard on her, and she felt hairs stand up on end in excitement.

Wordlessly, he brought himself down on her. Gently, at first, she felt his warmth immenseness surround her slowly. His soft, warm, expansive flesh surrounded her, enveloping her. She could feel herself being pushed into the mattress underneath his huge belly. She could feel the pressure on her chest, slowly constricting her breathing. Looking up, Elliot knew what was happening, and he made sure not to overdo it. While Anna grasped about underneath, grabbing at his soft, velvety skin, he made sure not to completely crush her into the ground. It was so tempting though, as Elliot squeezed Anna underneath his fat gut, he really wanted to squash her until she was paper thin. And as she reached around and grabbed his broad behind, it only became more tempting.

He gently got up, first to his knees, then standing up above Anna, and gently turned around so his butt was hovering precariously above her face. Taunting her, threatening her. He was taking it slowly, letting the tension raise slowly, until he felt a sharp smack from beneath. That was it. The time for being gentle was over. He dropped quickly and sharply, knocking the wind out of Anna and squeezing her between the soft cushions of her bed and the soft cushions of Elliot’s ass. “How’s that feel?” He asked her, celebrating his victory.

“Shhhoooo goooooffdddd.” She replied, her speech obstructed by so much flabby behind. He shifted in position, grinding her into the mattress. Elliot smiled to himself. It was always good to make friends. There were definitely signs of life from beneath, he could feel Anna reaching around and squeezing his fat thighs tightly.

It was tempting for him to stay there all night, but before too long he rolled over and let her out. She didn’t hesitate, and immediately scampered up to cuddle alongside him. Even though Elliot was the much taller of the pair, he enjoyed being the little spoon. Anna pressed her face into his back fat, the texture a little sticky from working up a sweat over their squashing session, and sighed happily.

“You know, you’re really good at this.” She told him, still coming down from the immense sensation.

“You’re not so bad yourself.” He told her, “Normally I go a bit easier on people, especially for their first time, but you just wanted more and more.”

She grinned to herself. “Well, maybe we should try round two after you get some snacks in you.”

“That sounds like fun.”

[thecoroutfitters]

When someone in charge of their particular operates and also job it assists a country to create any sociable plus economical progress surroundings. Now college students usually are confident and have a feeling of good results to join higher education soon after prosperous realization education instruction. Modern manages to graduate were being a lesser amount of eager compared to old graduated pupils, only the current graduated pupils who seem to acquired a lot more than 50,Thousand with loans had been less likely so that you can agree their particular degrees had been really worth the things they paid for. Even though getting accepted right into a good higher education is an excellent get started, each student themselves need to be encouraged, accomplished, and creative so as to make importance of the price tag and become effective. This shows the necessity for lots more people to venture to school to acquire a college degree because doing so receives these a position that should grow their income by means of 20 to 30 million money.

Which creates me personally to my latest issue: How will i convince college students honest safe music downloads of which institution will be worth the while? Instructors let you choose a certain part. Based on Clayton (The new year), “Individuals with bachelor’s qualifications receive concerning 60 % above people that have only a school degree or diploma, whom consequently receive regarding Forty percent above senior high school dropouts.” This kind of truth will provide a powerful incentive for kids to wish to venture to college, being more productive economically than others that happen to be a lesser amount of qualified. Jill’s tale is like that regarding so many of my personal alternative pupils which function themselves into fatigue merely to be around in college. Kravitz connected George as much as a device in which measured his brain surf. Being a university as well as student, you will notice precisely how important it’s to comprehend people.

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Make Yourself Beneficial and Miserable

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Scholarships do not need to always be reimbursed by the individual. Of course, My spouse and i figured out the ins and outs involving crafting announcement stories even though soaking in your educational setting, however the serious takeaway was the reality that I had created the ability to fly above a Group 5 storm, affect about arrested murderers’ opportunities, plus bbq grill disgraced political figures – which Used to to be a small reporter. In class, students are predicted to generally be dependable in order to match its work/due date ranges with challenges. To be able extra cash you would be creating, you are able to repay your university debts that any number of individuals are stating no longer has enough management and something from the factors higher education is just not worthwhile. As Henry stares with the purple bars, your dog mentions himself-about a 40 dollars value badges he / she attained on the approach to just as one Eagle Hunt, pertaining to the love involving aggressive Nordic water skiing, how he / she climbed the actual forty-eight highest highs inside Nh just before your dog switched 12, precisely how her overall id has to do with getting together with goals. To safeguard your current dissertation assertion effectively, apply relevant estimates, suggestions, specifics, as well as stats within the same portion and take the opportunity to consider each and every argument as well as its meaning. If you believe you could take care of this challenging aggravating, consider utilising this in your paper.)

That they don’t make you examine, please take a address, and accomplish that or that. Brandon Busteed, Gallup’s government movie director regarding education and learning plus labourforce improvement, mentioned his or her group anticipated more people to be able to passionately concur their particular educations were worth it. Carryout the thorough analysis online and throughout collections. There exists this blog woman We satisfy this acquired a qualification with regard to information technology but the woman functions as a possible electric powered member of staff for any business. For me, their conditions elevate 2 important inquiries: For a professor plus clb counselor, how will i work around most of these students’ extenuating situation in a fashion that is definitely sympathetic nevertheless organization, and how may i influence all these individuals in which institution will probably be worth their particular when?

If you might be within secondary school or even have an acquaintance who’s going to be, essay composing aid catapult the article author into the great college. That they get independence from your daily disciplined surroundings of your classes. It allows visitors to experience a host which is a stage much better your “real world”. College tuition costs include grown appreciably in the last few years, there aren’t virtually any indication of this pattern slowing down. Sad to say, it is actually much harder than before to getting a stage.

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In the end, this could impact ones quality lifestyle. The requirements depends in line with what specific belongings you look out for in colleges. In case you’re engaged comprehend several work connected cut-throat examinations after graduating, right here one can learn about this: Report on entry ways tests just after commencement. Besides a different education the lady got a employment where by the lady figured out something more important however the woman’s level could not matter on her behalf job headhunter.

A high school graduate student isn’t likely for you to compete with a college masteral to get a teaching occupation or perhaps a promotion career. Thus, it’s bad not to include university education. To perform this specific mission and also be sure to the educators, create a strong discussion, take a selected aspect, plus demonstrate exactly why other folks should really adopt a person’s standpoint. Necessities such as individuals who have an advanced education they usually receive from regarding 10 1 hour or more. It will need to have an important character-you, presumably-a setting, some kind of issue, along with tension. Imagine: if you were a admissions representative, what would an individual be looking to get in, state, you?

from Patriot Prepper Don't forget to visit the store and pick up some gear at The COR Outfitters. Are you ready for any situation? #SurvivalFirestarter #SurvivalBugOutBackpack #PrepperSurvivalPack #SHTFGear #SHTFBag

[shelleyseale]

12 Days of Giving: The Gift of Mindfulness

This is the second in our special “12 Days of Giving” series running for the holiday season. It’s a little different from what you might think of as traditional presents or giving. We aren’t really talking about stuff you buy or a gift list. Rather, on these 12 days, we will be talking about different gifts that you can give to yourself, or others — gifts that have a deeper meaning, that can help you live with intention, be happier, be healthier. Soul gifts, you might even call them. Join us on the journey.

For the most part, a lot of us go through life just getting from one task to the next, planning dinner or the next day, repeating the same mistakes or bad habits, sort of drifting through life without being really cognizant of what we are doing, the life we are creating. And so days pass, unheralded. Months and then years slowly trickle by, and we realize that we haven't done so many of the things we set out to do, we wanted to do. We are getting older, and still we have not lived. I don't want life to be that way. Living mindfully means, most of all, focusing on the present moment. The now. It's all we have really, this actual moment happening right now. Be there. Enjoy it, or at least learn from it. It can be really challenging to be fully present in the moment, and I have to admit that I still don't do it often enough. But I've become much better at it — and much better at recognizing when I'm so far ahead of myself, or in the past, that I'm just not here. I've become better at issuing myself prompts to just take a moment to notice what's around me, and be here now.

Here are some of the key takeaways I've learned in the past 10 years I've been practicing mindfulness: Stuff clutters our lives and our minds. I'm no austere minimalist, don't get me wrong. I have my share of things, but by and large I try to be selective about possessions that have real value and meaning to me. After my Six Items or Less challenge, I cleaned out my closet and gave lots of stuff away. I did the same with other items during the Giving and Sustainability projects. In the never ending rush of accumulation and consumerism that seems to drive so much of American life, stuff becomes our master. Have too much of it, and it begins to own you.

We can choose to be happy. We create our own happiness in our minds, by and large. Of course events and situations can be painful, tragic and traumatic. At those times we are often unhappy, stressed or even grief-stricken. But I'm talking about the permanent ongoing baseline, not fluctuations of circumstance. True happiness is internal, not external, not reliant on other people or things or events. We make our own happiness, every single day.

Surround yourself with people who inspire you. It took me a long time to learn to weed negative, toxic, soul-sucking people out of my life. We can't always pick and choose, and have to get along with people who are in our paths, at work, etc. But as far as people you let into your inner circle, your entire life, it's just as with food - what you bring into it is what you'll get from it. I am blessed to have a wonderful partner, loving family and some of the most awesome friends in the world. I have made a conscious choice to leave toxic people out of my life and surround myself with the pretty darn wonderful. Don't be with people who make you miserable; be with people who make your spirit soar. What we do really matters. Paying attention to little things around the house that suck energy; buying a lot of food from your local farmer rather than stuff that's been trucked thousands of miles by a corporation...all these things add up. They may seem small, but there are seven billion people on our planet now. If enough of us do enough small things, we really do affect the world. There's no excuse not to live consciously, mindfully, with intention. Every moment. As far as we know, we only have this one life. Let's make it count. Read the full article

[jsms01]

5 ways to change your mindset

When we’re struggling with our weight, it can feel like some things are out of our control – from the foods we eat to the everyday challenges that steer us away from making slimming-friendly choices. As experts in the psychology of weight loss, Slimming World will empower you to take back control and build new healthy habits that last.  Here, five inspirational slimmers share how being a member has helped them change their mindset around food and drink, and spurred them on to lasting success. Discover our latest special offers here

Yes you can… understand yourself as a slimmer

There are many reasons why we might struggle to lose weight. Some of them are known to us – like the foods we eat. Others might be just outside of our awareness. At Slimming World, we’ll help you uncover the deeper psychological barriers to your success, and then arm you with the tools to overcome them, so that you can develop healthier new grooves. MORE ON THE BLOG: 9 easy ways to make healthy habits stick

The support of her Slimming World Consultant helped Laura Allen understand the link between her emotions and her secret-eating habit… “I’d always been a big emotional eater and I used food as both a comfort and a reward, often eating in private so that my family wouldn’t know. When I joined Slimming World, it was such a relief to open up about my secret eating, and my group helped me to understand and gradually break the habit without ever feeling deprived. I finally have some control over my eating. Before, I’d pick my way through the day, snacking on crisps and chocolates and finishing with a takeaway. Now I cook my meals from scratch, making delicious Slimming World versions of my favourite recipes, like chicken tikka masala.” Read Laura’s full story here

Yes you can… stop negative self-talk

We’re much more likely to make healthy choices when we feel good about ourselves. However, that’s easier said than done, especially if we’ve fallen into the habit of putting ourselves down. Surrounding yourself with positive people who understand and genuinely care about you is vital when it comes to silencing that inner critic. In fact, our research found that 91% of our members feel more positive about themselves since joining Slimming World. MORE ON THE BLOG: The surprising stats that prove kindness is key to weight loss

Years of abuse about her weight had left Harriet Peacock feeling trapped in a cycle of negative self-criticism. But when she joined Slimming World, she found the acceptance she’d been looking for – and went on to lose a staggering 20st. “Over the years, I’d tried pretty much every diet going. They never worked and would usually end in a binge-eating session because I was so hungry, and with me branding myself as a failure who was destined to be overweight and miserable forever.  Group taught me that I was worthy of happiness and it gave me back my confidence. Apart from family and close friends, my fellow members were the first people who made me feel accepted. They just got it, were never judgemental and, as the weight came off, they cheered me on every step of the way.” Read Harriet’s full story here

Yes you can… fit changes around your lifestyle

You’re more likely to stick to healthy habits when they slot into your everyday routine. Our Food Optimising eating plan is fully flexible, so it can easily work with your lifestyle, whether you’ve got a busy family life, a full-on job, a packed social calendar – or all three! MORE ON THE BLOG: How to personalise Food Optimising to you

Before he joined Slimming World, Matt Symons thought he’d have to give up his social life to lose weight. Then a question from his Consultant changed everything… “I used to meet my friends in the pub after work almost every night, catching up over food and drink – I could easily get through 10 pints, then stop for a kebab or pizza on the way home. My weight crept up and up, but it didn’t occur to me to change my lifestyle. Then, just before Christmas 2016, a metal dining chair buckled beneath me at a friend’s house party. I joined Slimming World a week later. In one session, I talked about how I’d been avoiding the pub because I was worried I’d just regain all the weight as soon as I started socialising again. When my Consultant, Steven, asked me if I could change the way my social life was set up, it was a revelation. Everyone chipped in with ideas for nights out, and I started to meet up with my new friends from group for coffee dates and cinema trips. I also discovered that I really enjoyed tenpin bowling, and we started going for regular games. I was having a great time – without feeling hungover and low the following morning!” Read Matt’s full story here

Yes you can… get support on your terms

There’s no telling how or when life will throw up challenges to your weight loss. That’s why you’ll find lots of ways to connect with the Slimming World Community. Many of our Consultants have closed Facebook groups, where members can swap ideas, celebrate successes and help each other stay on track between groups. Plus, members enjoy exclusive 24/7 access to our app, with its 1,900 recipes, behaviour-changing tools, real-life success stories, progress tracking and the Slimming World barcode scanner, for support wherever you are and whenever you need us.  MORE ON THE BLOG: All about our barcode scanner

Member Charlie Morgan found the app an invaluable lifeline… “I downloaded the app immediately after signing up. On my first trip to the supermarket as a member, I used the Slimming World barcode scanner on my phone to check the Syns on anything I wasn’t sure about. I also checked the app if I needed a reminder about the basics of Food Optimising. In my first week, I was surprised by just how much I could eat on the plan – and even more surprised when I lost 5lbs!  That gave me the confidence to be a bit more adventurous the following week, so I looked up some of our favourite dishes and used the app to find slimming versions. My girlfriend is vegetarian, and we found lots of recipes that could work for both of us – we’d cook the vegetarian version and I’d add meat to my portion at the end.’’ Read Charlie’s full story here

Yes you can… let go of guilt and shame

These emotions are two of the most common stoppers to our weight loss success. Learning to shed the burden of them is a change most of us could benefit from making, and that starts with finding an environment where you feel safe and free from judgement – which is exactly what you’ll find in our groups and our online Community. MORE ON THE BLOG: Discover how Slimming World can set you free from guilt

A fear of failure meant Sophie Ratcliffe hid her slimming goals. By sharing her journey with other Slimming World members, she finally found the support she needed to succeed. “Before joining Slimming World, I never told anyone when I was trying to lose weight, as I was sure I wouldn’t succeed. My son was being bullied at school because of my weight, which made me feel so guilty, but I had no idea how to change things. It was September 2021 when I first walked through Slimming World’s doors. At 24st, I felt embarrassed by my size, but no-one made me feel self-conscious. The other members were such a lovely bunch, I instantly knew I was safe and that they wouldn’t be judging me. I left the session feeling hopeful for the first time in ages.” Read Sophie’s full story here If you’re looking for lasting weight loss, you’ll find a world of support waiting at your local Slimming World group or in our vibrant online Community. We’d love to welcome you!

Free 7-day menu

Would you love a taste of the Food Optimising plan? Enter your email address below to receive a full week of delicious Food Optimising recipes, as well as our regular newsletter packed with more Slimming World food, inspiring member transformations and exciting special offers.  Source link Read the full article