#then I thought well anon just said protective zed does mean he has to be protective over Addison!

[sayorseee]

Hi friend! Could you do Protective!Zed? 👀

He blamed himself, really.

He’d gone and watched, ignoring the uneasy turning of his gut. A mistake, really.

She hits the gym floor hard, a sickening crack that he’ll replay in his head forever.

He shouldn’t have let her go off like that. So if he keeps an extra eye on her, dotting over her all day and night and making sure her every need is met until her leg heals. Well you can’t really blame him.

Zed doesn’t even let their dog into the couch, even though Zoey assured him she’s fine and would love to play with her dog.

“You could get more hurt!”

“I won’t break a bone cuddling my little fluff ball!” Zoey argues.

Zed frowns, though his sister is persistent. “Fine, but five minutes. Puppy doesn’t understand you’re hurt!”

Zoey rolls her eyes, though her annoyed look is quickly replaced with the sweetest smile as she pats her legs, urging puppy to climb onto her lap.

“I don’t think you understand that I’m fine.”

Zed shrugs. “Need more juice?”

“No.”

“Want another snack?”

Zoey looks up from her puppy play, her eyes twinkling with amusement. “You’re gonna make me super fat! How will I ever fly again?”

“You are never flying again, Zoe.”

[shadeswift99]

TnT Heals All Wounds

Words: 912

People: Bdubs, Zedaph, Impulse, Tango (no shipping)

Summary: A conflict of interest between the Boomers and Team ZIT leads to Zedaph and Bdubs becoming increasingly bitter toward each other. However, on a day when Impulse and Tango both turn out to be “too busy” for either of them, they’ll have to blast through the barrier and work things out on their own. (based on an anon ask on @hermitcraftheadcanons​)

"No way! We've had this meeting scheduled for weeks!" Bdubs crossed his arms and scowled, the ends of his red bandana quivering with fury.

Zed stuck his tongue out and grabbed Impulse's arm, tugging him closer towards his front door. "Well, I just need this one thing tested quickly, so you'll have to wait. I'm sure they won't mind doing a tiny favour for an old friend, right Tango?"

Tango opened his mouth to speak, then startled as Bdubs enthusiastically interrupted him. "Nuh-uh, Zedaph, he's booked! Take a number and get in line!" Bdubs stepped in front of Tango protectively, shuffling him in the direction of the shopping district.

Tango and Impulse made eye contact across the gap.

"... Actually," Impulse started, grinning softly and disentangling his arm from Zed's grasp. "We're both kinda busy today."

Zed and Bdubs froze in unison. "What?"

"Yeah, we're going end raiding together!" Tango slung his sword across his shoulders and readied some rockets. "We both need more shulkers, and it's a pretty good way to de-stress."

"But I need you to -"

"But we had a -"

"But I thought you said -"

"But we've been planning -"

"It's really quiet out there, in the end," Tango monologued over both of their protests, "Quiet, and peaceful, and -"

"- just a really nice place to spend an afternoon," Impulse continued, walking backwards away from the fuming pair. "I'm sure you'll figure something out in the mean time. Cya!" He activated his rockets and soared off into the distance, Tango following shortly after.

A long, awkward silence passed.

"Well if you hadn't ruined the schedule -" Bdubs growled.

"Well if you hadn't been so pushy with your ‘schedule’ -" Zedaph retorted.

Both trailed off into silence again as the anger and words drained away.

They knew it wasn't really each other they were mad at, just like they both knew that the thing they were wasn’t even ‘mad’ at all.

Zed sighed and sat down heavily on the doorstep. "This turf war stuff has really been keeping them busy, hasn't it." He ran his finger through the sand at his feet, avoiding eye contact.

Bdubs sat down too, taking a moment to rub at his tired eyes. "Yeah, me too. It's demanding stuff, all this war and keeping up with the Mayor's orders and everything.... We haven't had time for a Boomers meeting in months."

"I haven't even seen Tango or Impulse in months. I've been busy and they've been busy and it just - it just never happened, I guess..." Zed sniffled slightly and wiped his hand across the scuffed sand, obliterating the lines he'd made.

"...Hey, Zed?"

"Yeah?" Zedaph looked up, just barely.

"I could test your cave contraption, if you want. I usually test the stuff Tango makes for the Boomers, it couldn't be too hard to test yours, especially if it doesn't blow up like that other stuff does." He chuckled.

Zed thought for a moment, then perked up. "You know, I hadn't actually thought of making it explode before... That's a great idea!" He brushed off his hands and leapt to his feet. "I'm going to need you to test it before and after I make the modifications, and I'll need to know how different amounts of tnt affect the results - come on, I think I have a spare lab coat around here somewhere!"

Bdubs' face lit up. "Tnt and a new outfit? Oh, well this is just too good to be true!" He bounded toward the iron door and let himself be pulled into Zed's eccentric landscape of damp stone and colourful wires.

High above on the top of Zed’s mountain, Impulse and Tango quietly high-fived.

"I knew they'd come around eventually," Impulse whispered, mischievous crinkles around his eyes.

"...icky purple dirt high-five, won't come off for days -" Tango broke from muttering and wiping off his hand to peer down below. "Yeah, it didn't feel right, having them at each other's throats all the time. Hopefully they're having fun and working things out now." A deep boom vibrated through the mountain, followed by two synchronized shouts of glee.

Impulse winced. "Hopefully their working together won't be too risky for the health and safety of the server."

"Yeah..." Tango looked thoughtful. "Hey, we really should make more time for them after this, though. They were right, things have been a bit busy lately."

"Well, they wouldn't be so busy if some people would just let nature take its course and let the mycelium spread-"

Tango punched his arm and laughed, almost falling off the mountain as he dodged the return blow. "Not a chance, pal, not a chance. I think I can manage to clear my schedule without filling it up with stinky purple dirt."

"Fine, have it your way." Impulse smiled. "I better get back to harvesting - uh, to doing things. Boomers meeting after this?"

"Yeah, in a couple hours. I still need time to go find out what explodificating nightmare-machine Zed's got cookin' up in there." Tango looked longingly at the iron door.

"Not right now! Remember, we're not done 'end raiding' yet!" Impulse warned.

"Oh, right, uuh... Watch out for that shulker!"

Impulse dodged the nonexistent shulker shot and took off, soaring towards his base. "Thanks for the heads up, buddy!"

"Not a problem!" Tango called after him.

He winced at how loudly his voice echoed across the sand, but he had a feeling that the noise of explosions and reconciliation would be more than enough to cover the sound.

[hermitcraftheadcanons]

Zombie Apocalypse AU Masterpost 2 Electric Boogaloo

Previous Post: https://hermitcraftheadcanons.tumblr.com/post/618314308275863552/zombie-apocalypse-au-masterpost

-Bdubs is slowly going feral because he has the virus, it just doesn't show itself physically.

-Cub was tempted to purposefully get the virus to try and help find a cure, (they probably don't have lab rats given the circumstances,) by Scar talked him out of it.

-The timeline of events with DocM is that he started in the NHO group, they ended up dispersing (Etho turned and then left to ensure the safety of his friends, Beef ended up going separate due to Doc and Bdubs' constant fighting and Bdubs stormed off after an argument.) He ends up getting taken in by TFC, (he's the first to arrive,) and eventually captures Rendog.

-Stressmonster and Iskall originally lived in a cabin in the mountains. After Iskall got swept away in a snow storm and Joe and Cleo stopped by, Stress had no idea there was a Zombie outbreak.

-Hypnotizd and XB ended up trespassing in Jevin's property and Jevin shot Hypno. XB pleaded to Jevin that they weren't zombies and to not hurt them further and Jevin begrudgingly went, 'okay, fine. You aren't taking my food though.'

-Impulse's weapon of choice was a shovel.

-Grian can't fly in this AU. Let's be real, if he could, it would be pretty OP.

-Keralis most definetly gave a larger share of his rations to Xisuma while he was sick.

-TangoTek entirely blames himself for Impulse leaving and Zedaph getting bit. He feels especially conflicted because he wants to leave because he's convinced they both hate him and blame him but he can't because 'what if they go looking for him?' 'What if someone worse comes from that?'

-The location of Etho's bite is right on the front of the neck. He actually passed out from blood loss initially and he very nearly died. (Luckily for him the zombie didn't pull away, ripping out anything important (like a windpipe of an oesophagus,) giving Doc time to carefully unhinge the zombie's jaw and save Etho.) Nobody was quite sure how Etho was even alive with a big chunk out of his neck until he started displaying some strange behaviour.

-False is usually the one who stays up late to stand guard and protect her group.

-Mumbo accidentally caught Hypno in one of his traps at one point but let him go.

-Hay here’s a dumb idea, The reason ren is immune to the zombie virus is because he has like an anti-zombie virus in his body it behaves just like a normal zombie virus but it doesn’t turn you into a zombie, so how the hermits turn the zombie hermits human again is by making ren bite them.

-I have an angst ending and a no-angst ending so first here's the not-angst one: Doc and Ren team up with Cub and Scar to make a cure (so Ren doesn't have to bite everyone personally). They travel around finding every bitten survivor and salvageable zombie they can, using the weapons and resources from the NHO for protection. They find ways of producing and distributing enough cure for everyone, and during that process all of the Hermits decide to stay friends and in touch afterward.

-For the Zombie AU, if Scar doesn't already have like a different role in this au, he could've possibly been the first human infected because *someone's* pet cat ate a weird looking mouse and bit their owner.

-This is very angsty and gory, so fair warning: How fast does the virus spread through the body from the bite? If slow, you can cut the bitten part off before it spreads out through the body. To doc having a robot arm, what if he got bit and out of fear, they amputated his arm to stop the spread. I know y'all probably don't wanna go with body horror, but that's something to consider in this AU.

-Lowkey I feel zombie Etho doesnt do justice to his epic PVP skillz, but!! I do see Etho to be something SIMILAR to it! Idk if you've ever played Telltale's The Walking Dead game, but Etho could a zombie whisperer, a human who wears zombie skin and lives amongst the zombies for protection. So when Etho got bit, they THOUGHt he turned but actually just decided, hey I live here now and just vibin.

-You know how ren being a werewolf is popular in the fandom(from what I've seen) maybe that's why is immune to being a zombie and getting bitten by him if your infected cures it because the zombie infection and werewolf infection cancel eachother out.

-A more jokey Zombie!Au thing: The first episode of Llamas with hats but it's Zombie!Etho and Beef.

-I feel like if Wels could get to some of his friends he would try his hardest to protect them and if he ever managed to get bit it would be to save someone else.

-There is just always so much angst potential in any scenario or AU where it involves the possibility of Wels sacrificing himself in some way to protect his friends from something poor bb 😔

-Would infected hermits be able to like recognize people after the infection zombified them or whatever it is? Because if so oh my god imagine the angst.

(All those above in red are from our community's lovely anons!)

-About the anti-zombie Ren bite thing: Doc has the idea suddenly in the middle of an argument so the conversation goes a little like this:

Ren: "So what I'm trying to say, my dude, is that would never work because -"

Doc: "Ren. Bite me."

Ren: "Oh yeah, real mature way to end a disagreement there -"

Doc: *facepalming* "No, Ren, I mean actually.... Just do it, I'll explain later."

-Angst ending: They could never produce enough cure to stem the tide of undeath. They all choose to band together and take shelter underground, hoping to wait it out. They use X's tunnel, but that many people that close together smells irresistible to a horde. The zombies flood after them into the tunnel. X says he'll buy them some time, even though he is terrified. He collapses the tunnel on himself and the zombies so the others can escape. His last thought: At least I get to die as myself.

-Thinking about Etho's bite location (you said it was on his neck): Most bites are on the shoulder or leg (bit from behind while running away) or on the arm (bit while raised to defend). To be bitten on the neck he would have to have his arms and shoulders lowered. Etho, being a good fighter, would have only done this if it was absolutely necessary. Conclusion: he was bitten with his arms stretched out to protect someone behind him, and he knew the consequence that his choice would have.

-(@shadeswiftdraws.)

-The NHO are all strangely dressed (Etho is kakashi, Doc is green, Bdubs has a bandana,) because they were all at a cosplay convention. (-@tomcatacaphe.)

-When Etho left The nHo, he brings a Journal with him. Every Night he'll write a Journal entry. He'll write just about anything, there even some random lyrics and some pretty flowers he pick up along his travels. But as the Journal goes on, the words slowly became wobbly. Inconsistent. until finally, Unreadable chicken skrach. His final (at least readable) entry is: "-I hoPE yoU GUyZ ArE DoInG bETThEr ThAn I Am" As some point in time, Etho lost his Journal and Joe hills found it.

-Speaking of Joe Hill, he made it his personal mission to collect every literature and entertament media he can possibly carry on him. From Dnd Book, poetry, Documentary DVD's, to random journal He think would be usefull. Stress is happy to help Joe but Cleo is a little annoyed because it's will only slow them down, but Joe Argued that "If there's no knowledge left, then what will the future be? Just staying alive and surviving?" Cleo begrudgingly agrees.

-I can totally see Joe and Cleo Rocking an actual Sword and Dnd Cosplay (Joe got is a gift while Cleo Commissions her's after seeing Joe whip out his sword one time in a one shot DnD session) they keep the swords, but they ditch the Costume pretty early on tho.

-Mumbo's next Job Interview would be schedule at Concorp. But then the Zombie apocalypse happened on his way there.

(-@tearosepedall.)

-I don’t want this au to end but here’s my take: most of them get to the bunker where they don’t develop a cure, but do create a vaccine. Occasionally they will venture out to hand out the vaccine to survivors. Still, they all decide to stay into stay together. But because they were unable to develop a cure, even though they really try, there are some how have been lost such as etho, zed, and mumbo. Still the rest of them morn and try their best to survive without modern society. (-@lookitsspacekween.)

https://hermitcraftheadcanons.tumblr.com/post/618587883366957056/tw-very-brief-mention-of-vomit-general-warnings (-@carpe-shovelem.)

-Funny/happy ending to the Zombie AU: The hermits set up a zombie funneling system where the ones that didn't die from infection get bit by Ren to get turned back and they return the dead and give them proper burials. (-@my-cat-is-a-bastard.)

-I just remembered the thought post with Tuartis sleeping through things, Bdubs sleeping through the apocalypse, but now we've got Wels on the sleep team too! Wonder if he'd have slept through the apocalypse as well... (-@853dragons.)

TW: Mentions of dead animals:

I've got one last bit for the zombie au, it ties into my parasite one: With the rumors that the outbreak started in the Convex cancer research facility, and Scar feeling guilt because he Should Have Been Able To Stop This... It really was their fault. As a company. It wasn't intentional, of course, but Convex created the parasite. It was during research into a cure for certain conditions that are notoriously risky/impossible to perform surgery on, like brain tumors or lukemia-type cancer. The hope was to utilize the parasites as something that could harmlessly go in, eat or destroy all the cancerous cells, then die off, leaving a perfectly healthy human. The research project was abandoned after a several years, when every single attempt ended with either dead or, in later years, extremely sickly rats. Although the final round seemed promising, the rats weren't showing obvious signs of a decline in health after two weeks, Convex was convinced to just give it up and that the utilization of parasitic worms was asking for more trouble than it was worth. Plus, PETA was getting dangerous with their choices in protest against the tests, which was the main reason it was called off. Cub and the board of directors didn't want to risk bodily harm to their researchers, and it truly was getting so beyond ridiculous that a few bodyguards weren't enough protection.

Some researchers took some of the test rats home as pets, including our Patient Zero, because they really were quite cute. Patient Zero got bit by his rat, and nobody really thought anything of it for a couple weeks until his behavior took a bad turn. He was picking fights and throwing verbal abuse, and no amount of warnings and write-ups were giving any hint of stopping him. It all finally resulted in him viciously biting fellow labworkers, which sent two of them and himself to the ER. Upon arrival he had to be restrained and isolated lest he bite more people. He was fired from the company, his bodyguards pulled, but Scar had been friends and continued to visit him regularly, wondering where the change had come from, and saddened by his old friend's obvious decline in health. Nurses told him he was refusing to eat or drink, and too violent to reason with nor release to anywhere but the police or psychiatric hospital. Soon, there were more reports of uncharacteristicly aggressive actions from PZ's victims. And from there.... Well, it's your choice where the story goes, but it didn't take long for Scar to put the puzzle together.

-(@basaltdragon.)

More to be added!