#then i can life admin and knit later tomorrow

[bigcats-birds-and-books]

oooh, i need to knit four (4) rows of this shawl every day until the end of the month to finish by the recipient's birthday. which isn't, like. bad. but it ALSO doesn't take into consideration that, a.) the early rows will be much quicker than the later rows, b.) i've got three (3) lil non-negotiable deadlines to hit by or before then, too, or c.) i've been backburnering the knitting and doing like. MAYBE. two rows a day so far.

[theherocomplex]

The state of the Bee, because it’s been a little while! 

(medical/health/COVID-19 mention cw)

I’m not super-active here on Tumblr at the moment, though I miss it, weirdly? Right now most of my fandom-y interactions are taking place over on Twitter (where you can follow me! If you so desire!), because the danmei fandoms I’m most active in -- well, 2ha, really -- have the most activity there. I’m on Discord a lot, too! 

As for me -- things are...continuing? I still have a job, even though the admin at our university has mismanaged the hell out of the semester so far and our cases are spiking; my family and loved ones are healthy; Orpheus is large and loud and perfect. 

But I’m dealing with other health issues that are pretty terrifying, and while my doctors think the worst-case scenario is unlikely, it’s still easy for my brain to say “they’re wrong, and you’re going to suffer and possibly die”. Either way, it means more surgery, which is...super-fun to navigate in the time of COVID. 

And I’m pretty isolated, and have been for over a year. I’ve seen one friend and six coworkers since March 2020, and I can’t even really count the coworkers since we try to avoid each other for safety reasons if we have to be in the department together. So I’m just...alone, a lot, with this health stuff, and I shouldn’t even complain because everyone else is the same position.

Mostly I am coping with writing -- danmei fic is a good chunk of it, but original writing is mainly where it’s at, so I don’t have a ton to share. But! I am writing lovely cute shenanigans about disaster lesbians, and sweet pining boys and the merrows who love them, and I’m trying to plan the monsterfucker anthology I want to run later this year, so it’s a lovely, comforting place to be. A Lesson in Drowning is coming along, though that’s slow going since I still have so many threads to connect, and I want to to do satisfyingly! Especially since it’s been LITERAL YEARS since I started writing this dang fic. I love it to pieces, and as much as I want to start posting the chapters I have finished, I know I’ll be so much less stressed if I finish the entire fic (two and a half chapters to go, since I just rearranged the last few chapters to give the fic room to breathe) before I start posting again. 

I also started The Artist’s Way again, though in a very slapdash kind of way. I need to really dig in and commit, so I think I’ll give myself today to relax and eat my way through a few dozen chocolate chip cookies, then dive in tomorrow. 

Oh, and I’m crafting! A lot! Embroider, knitting, sewing, quilting, cross-stitch, yarn-dyeing. I treated myself to a spinning wheel for my birthday and she is now the second love of my life (after Orpheus). Most of that goes on Twitter, too, but I do want to start posting on Tumblr more. So expect to see lots of that, coming your way!

Also baking. Lots and lots of baking, especially since I got a new range last week (after a whole Saga with my landlord, sigh. Some things never change). Bread is on the menu today, as well as molasses cookies. 

So, here we are. I know I need to focus on being grateful for what I have -- and also not complaining about the health stuff, since everyone is in a rough place right now -- and taking better care of myself in general. But I am here, and writing, and moving forward. That’s all we can really ask for, right? 

How are YOU guys doing?? I hope you’re all staying safe, and well, and taking care of yourselves. <3 <3 

[thebiasrekkers]

The Girl In The Window - MYG

For @prisczero​, a companion story to their fic The Boy In The Window. 

Plot: The girl next door romance - except it’s a window.

Rating: PG // SFW

Genre: fluff | romance | next door neighbors

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Female Reader

Warnings: None

Links: FAQ || BTS Masterlist || Admin E’s AO3 || [ REQUESTS ARE OPEN ]

Word Count: 3,152

AN: I adore this story concept and wanted to do something special; mostly because they’re such a huge fan of my BTS Mafia series, “Make It Right”. So yeah, this is for you. I hope this makes your week! Please go check out her stuff, she’s amazing. All reblogs, critiques/reviews, comments and affection are accepted! Happy reading!

© thebiasrekkers (Admin E). All rights reserved. Reposting/modifying our work is prohibited. Translations are not allowed. Plagiarism/stealing is not tolerated by any means. Legal action will be taken in instances of theft.

He wasn’t a morning person.

Not by a long shot.

But what choice did he have since the movers only had a slot available at 7AM? If he didn’t do it now, Yoongi would be forced to wait until tomorrow to get the rest of his shit together at his new place. He wasn’t about to wait. He’d waited long enough. He needed to get out now.

After four hours, all of his belongings were situated in his new apartment. It was modest, modern, and simple enough that he wouldn’t complain. Attachments were hard for him and he didn’t expect himself to be staying there longer than a year. Moving around helped him think; helped broaden his horizon and expand his spreadsheet of experiences.

It helped breathe life into his music.

The sun was out, but Yoongi was a Night Owl. He showered, ate a frozen dinner, and trudged to his bedroom. He pulled the blackout curtains over the window and crawled into bed. He didn’t care if his hair was wet or that the window was still open. If he caught a cold, oh-fucking-well. He’d get over it. 

Just like every other obstacle in his life.

Waking up several hours later, Yoongi busied himself with unpacking a few boxes. Mainly the ones for his mini studio. Monitors were arranged on a desk, an electronic keyboard plugged into the wall and situated one side of the L-shaped desk. A sound board sat off just to the left of his keyboard and two large speakers rested on the floor on either sides of his desk. Hooking up the robot arm to his microphone, he adjusted the shock mount and pop-filter, swiveling it back and forth to make sure it was exactly where he wanted it to be. 

Desktop tower, dozens of cords and cables, and readjustment of his desk chair later, he was finally satisfied with his work station. Yoongi booted up everything, made sure all of his programs were running smoothly, before debating on making dinner. A loud stomach growl following the thought was the deciding factor.

He opted for cup noodles this time.

Itching to get to work, he slurped down noodles as he pulled up his music making software. Hitting the ‘enter’ key, the bass fired off with a deep melody rolling through the tones. He eyeballed the time, not caring that it was late. It wasn’t like he was being loud and he didn’t have downstairs neighbors to worry about. As far as he knew, the walls were made of reinforced concrete.

Too bad he forgot that the window was open.

Yoongi blinked rapidly, his vision blurring momentarily as he stared listlessly at the computer screen. A soft haze of smoke wafted into his line of sight, reminding him that he hadn’t knocked off the ash on his cigarette in about ten minutes. Crossing his eyes, he saw that the cigarette nearly burned out to the filter. Sighing, he groped around for his can of soda. Shaking it, he dropped the ash and cigarette but into the mouth of the can. He took a moment to pull the sleeve of his hoodie back to look at his watch. It was almost three in the morning. 

“Maybe I should take a break,” he muttered, already standing from his chair. 

He stretched, popping a few bones and releasing the tension on the muscles around his neck and shoulders. Patting his pockets, he found his pack of smokes. He was already lighting up another cigarette as he made his way out to the window. Pulling back the blackout curtains, Yoongi mentally noted that he needed to do laundry at the end of the week. Regardless of his terrible habit, it didn’t mean he enjoyed sleeping in an ashtray.

Blinking against the light of the moon, Yoongi brushed his fingers through his hair. And that’s when he saw her. She looked lost in her own thoughts, hugging her arms close to her chest. He wondered if she was cold and thought about asking her, but then realized how creepy that would come across.

Inhaling slowly, he leaned out of the window. The ember glow from the end of the cigarette distracted him momentarily. He still didn’t know what he wanted to say, so Yoongi croaked out the only thing he could think of that wouldn’t sound completely asinine.

“Hey.”

Resting his elbows on the window sill, Yoongi swiveled the cigarette to the side of his mouth so he could get a better look at his neighbor. She seemed to scrutinize him, sizing him up. He wondered if she was going to say something about how loud he’d been the last few weeks.

“Hey. Smoking isn’t good for you, you know.”

He blinked, surprised that this was the answer she was giving him. He half expected to get cussed out because he’d been a lousy neighbor. He hadn’t introduced himself or even bothered to stop by to get to know his neighbors. Was it because he had no plans to stick around for longer than the lease term?

Chuckling, he watched the smoke push from between his teeth as he flashed her a grin. “You’re right.” And after a few seconds, Yoongi felt his deadpan expression return. It was his normal look - the one coined as his “resting bitch face” by others. “Hold on.”

Pulling away from the window, he reached around for the soda can on his desk. Holding both the cigarette and the can, he made a show of throwing the remaining cigarette into it. He waved the can back and forth, a gesture of “good faith” was what he would call it.

“Last one.”

She scoffed. Rightfully so. 

“You’re telling me you’re gonna quit smoking?”

He nodded and Yoongi watched as she shook her head. She didn’t have a reason to believe him. Hell, he didn’t half believe it himself. However, instead of disgust, there was a ghost of a smile on her face. It wasn’t much, but it was something.

“Just like that?”

Yoongi’s expression remained neutral. But even he could feel his eyes tightening up around the corners as he held back a snicker. He’d often been told that his eyes had a way of smiling even if his mouth didn’t. Sometimes he was just too honest. Or at least his eyes were.

Nothing else was said between them. He opened his mouth, prepared to continue the conversation, but soon realized it would fall flat. Again, he tried and, again, he shut his mouth. He rubbed at his fringe in frustration, attempting to start the conversation back up. There had to be something…

“What’s your name?” he finally blurted out, peering intently across the small expanse of space that separated them. 

She crossed her arms across her chest, humming to herself. She was probably surmising whether or not it was a good idea to divulge such information to him. Especially if he’d been a rude neighbor up until this point.

“You first.”

Brows knit over his eyes, but he chuckled a little to himself. She wasn’t about to make this easy for him. “I’m Yoongi. Your turn.”

And then she smiled; a soft gesture that seemed to pull the breath straight out of his lungs. “My name is Y/N.”

“Y/N,” he murmured to himself, rolling it over his tongue. 

Movement caught his attention and he watched Y/N shuffle slightly, her arms tightening around her chest. Maybe she really was cold. It was late, after all. 

There was a cascade of andromeda reflected in her eyes, stirring something inside of him. For what felt like an eternity, nothing else was said between them. Instead, Yoongi watched as Y/N looked lost in her own world. He couldn’t help but think it was a little adorable that she seemed lost inside of her own head.

He’d leave her to it. There was something he needed to work on; now more than ever.

Yoongi disappeared into his room, closing the window. But he didn’t bother with the blackout curtains. He wanted her to see the light of his computer; to let her know that he was still there.

Pressing the “enter” key on his computer, the soft bass drummed across the speakers and reverberated off the floor. The rhythm wasn’t harsh or distracting. It was chill, soft like a whispered echo lost across the skies. 

Y/N looked a little tired. Maybe this will help her sleep.

Grinning, he threw the can into the trash by his desk. Setting up an automation playlist of things he’d worked on, he made sure that every piece was something relaxing. It would be loud enough to press through the glass. 

He knew that it would reach her.

Yoongi didn’t think there would be another night after that one. He was pretty sure he’d turned her off from wanting anything to do with him. It wasn’t like the 80’s where you could simply hold casual conversations with the next door neighbor through their window. Hell, it would have been more comical with two cans connected with a line of string.

That sounded more interesting.

But providence decided to show him some mercy and granted it to him. 

Then another. 

And another. 

And another.

The days turned into weeks - the two of them meeting every night to chat side by side with two full arm lengths separating them. For the first time in years, Yoongi could feel a connection that didn’t feel cheap or contrived. It was true and he didn’t have to question it. Y/N was so honest that he knew it to be true without poking or prodding her over it.

They laughed, fussed, cussed and nitpicked at each other. Yoongi couldn’t remember a time when he’d smiled so much; when he wasn’t throwing himself into his music and nothing else. When he wasn’t allowing for anything else to intrude into his world. He kept it that close to him for a reason. He kept his distance for a reason.

But not with her. 

With Y/N, he wanted to let her in. He wanted to get even closer to her. Closer than the stretch of arms and fingers it would take to reach her.

He wanted to touch her - to hold her hand and be near her than he was already allowed.

Groaning, he pressed the heels of his palms into his eyes. A small cluster of cigarette butts were piled in the plastic ashtray. He told her he’d quit smoking, but the mounting stress on his shoulders was about as much as he could stand. Yoongi couldn’t focus. Work was becoming tedious and while producing music was his passion, there was the constant yearning for a need to be resolved pulling at the forefront of his mind. 

This wasn’t going to work. He had to get this out of his system because whether he said it out loud or not, he knew one thing was true.

He couldn’t get Y/N out of his mind.

Sighing, he grabbed his hoodie. He decided that he needed to just see her. Not from the window, but from her front door.

A cold wind whipped through his body, halting him in his steps. Pulling out his phone, he spied the time. Normally she was home by now, but it was also getting a little late. She hadn’t called out to him so there was a chance that she was asleep. Hell, she probably could have been out with her own friends.

Making his way to her front door, he lifted up his hand to knock. But just before his knuckles could hit the surface, his nerves seemed to knot up inside his stomach. All of his worries, all of his doubts, came flooding across him mercilessly.

What if she doesn’t feel the same? he thought, his brows furrowing slightly as his hand slowly pulled away from the door. What if she pushes me away?

Yoongi roughly shook his head back and forth, pivoting away from the door. He couldn’t face her like this. He needed to clear his head. He needed to come back with more confidence. If she rejected him, she rejected him. They could at least still be friends. She could still smile at him.

Things didn’t have to change if he couldn’t have her.

He walked for what felt like miles, even though he knew it was only a few blocks. An hour passed and Yoongi knew he needed to head back. It was late, past the allotted time they usually met up, but he knew he had to take the chance now. Nothing would be certain if he did nothing.

Once again, he stood outside of her door. Yoongi attempted to swallow the lump in his throat, his heart jack hammering wildly in his chest. And once again, he raised his hand up to knock on the door.

It’s now or never, he thought.

But before his knuckles could hit the door, it swung open. His eyes went wide and he blinked in surprise as Y/N let out a small squeak of surprise. Yoongi stuffed his hands into the pockets of his hoodie, rocking back on his heels as he looked back at her.

“Hey.”

Silence. She seemed to be gathering herself before her own lips parted to speak.

“Hey.” 

Her voice sounded a little off; like she was attempting to dam up everything inside of her. Yoongi wasn’t sure what to say, so he opted to shift his weight from one foot to the other. This wasn’t how he’d planned it. It was like seeing Y/N’s face knocked all the fight straight out of him.

“Are you okay? I was worried when you didn’t show up! And there was no music, and–”

Yoongi blinked up at her. Under the light of the moon and the street light on the corner, her eyes shined like diamonds. It wasn’t until that same sheen pooled around the lower parts of her eyes that he realized she was about to cry. He stepped forward on impulse, his hands resting on either sides of her face as his thumbs swept away the tears that began to fall.

“Shh, don’t cry. I’m okay,” he said softly, and he couldn’t help the small smile that was forming on his lips. He couldn’t believe that she was worried over him like that. She’d been waiting for him all along. “I’m sorry for worrying you.”

He felt her leaning her cheek into one of his palms, causing his heart to skip a beat. She looked so pretty under the light that it almost hurt to look at her. 

“Why didn’t you come?”

And then her question, her soft voice, did make him close his eyes.

What could he say that wouldn’t sound like an excuse? What would even make sense?

The truth.

“I wanted to come to your door this time. But as I was about to knock, I chickened out...” He took a breath, wetting his lips and opening his eyes to look down at Y/N. “I just - I couldn’t do it. I was nervous…” He sighed. “So, I went out for a walk. Thought it would clear my head. But then I realized over an hour had gone by and I came back and… as soon as I was about to knock, the door swung open.” 

He couldn’t help but chuckle a little at what just transpired moments ago, as well as how in sync they both were. He was worried about her and she was worried about him. He wanted to see her up close and she was about to run next door to do just that.

Yoongi saw her smile, the insides of his palms wet from the fresh tears spilling down her cheeks. Her smile was the only reassurance that he had to know that they weren’t tears of sadness. 

“Yoongi?”

Again, he wiped at her face. “Yes? Why are you crying again?”

She shook her head back and forth, dabbing at her eyes with the sleeve of her hoodie. A knot twisted inside of Yoongi’s chest as his hands rested on her shoulders. He gave them a gentle squeeze, unable to chase the concern from his mind.

“I’m just happy.” Y/N looked back up at him and he gave a soft sigh of relief. “I’ve wanted to be this close to you for so long. I even had dreams about it.”

He couldn’t stop himself from smiling. “But you were scared of rejection.”

It wasn’t a question. She nodded.

Leaning down, he brought his face closer to hers - smelling the faint scent of her shampoo. “Me too. But here we are, aren’t we?”

He gave a voice to his feelings at last. Yoongi wasn’t sure where he’d mustered the courage. Maybe it was her tears. Or knowing that she was that worried about him, that her heart was drawing itself toward him without realizing it. Whatever the reason, Yoongi knew that he was so thankful.

Thankful for her.

“Y/N?” Her eyes lifted to meet his gaze and he let it linger there before lowering to stare down at her slightly parted mouth. “I want to kiss you.” 

His eye-line shifted to meet hers once more, waiting for her to give him permission to claim what he’d longed to taste for days now. Y/N said nothing. But she did, however, nod, and that was all he needed. One hand moved from her shoulder to rest at the back of her neck, pulling her into his space. His lips pressed gently over hers, sealing them with a soft kiss. Darkness overtook everything as he shut his eyes, wanting to enhance the flavor of this moment more than anything else.

Slowly, Yoongi pulled back - removing his mouth from hers. His fingers danced through the soft baby hairs at the nape of her neck and he stroked his thumb along the length of her jawline. There was a pinkish tint to her cheeks and he grinned down at her, the onset of tears clear in her eyes. 

Once again, silence filled the void. He wanted to hear her voice again; to know that this wasn’t a dream. Anything would have been fine. Yoongi just wanted to know it was from her.

Nerves bundled up around his chest; the all-too-familiar butterflies dancing in the pit of his stomach. And then Y/N took a breath, causing you to get lost in her gaze again. This woman who managed to send you soaring high and grounding you at the same time.

This girl he’d met through his window.

“You taste like cigarettes.”

Yoongi quickly bit his lip, stifling an outburst of laughter, before leaning in to bring you back into his center of gravity. Seconds before his lips met hers, he flashed a devious smirk at her.

“Last one, promise.”

[fresh-outta-jams]

Go for the Gold

Go for the Gold

Namjoon x Reader

Author: Admin Mo

Sequel to Kiss and Cry (Link in Masterlist)

Word Count: 2k

Genre: Soulmate Fluff

You and Namjoon had spent a while after you took off your bracelets and looked at your Soul Marks just sort of sitting there, crying, kissing, and holding each other until all of the heavy emotions that had been swirling around your hearts for so long had run their course. And then, like the nerds you were, you started talking about Harry Potter.

“I’m a Ravenclaw for sure.” You took a sip of homemade Shamrock Shake and watched the grin on Joonie’s face grow.

“So am I.”

“Wow, it’s like we were made for eachother.” You laughed.

He set his drink on the table and let his thumb rub your cheek a few times, admiring your features. You couldn’t help but flush red when he did it, warmth flooding your veins, spilling from your soul.

“How about that…” When he smiled, his dimples came out of hiding and sent your heart flying. And just as you were leaning in to press yet another kiss to his soft lips, your phone rang, leaving you both hanging.

“Hello?” You picked up. It was one of the other skaters.

“How’s your thing going?”

“It’s going better than expected. Which is to say amazingly.”

“So…”

“He’s my soulmate.” You could hear a group cheering on the other end of the line. When you looked up at Namjoon, he was grinning proudly, but when you caught his eyes, he covered his face, suddenly shy. You grinned and reached out for one of his large hands. “I know, it’s amazing. He’s amazing, I just...ugh...He’s so freaking perfect.”

Joonie’s face reddened adorably and he took the phone from you. “I think she’s pretty freaking perfect too, just to put that out there.” He listened to the group of your friends on the other end of the call for a few seconds, nodding and chuckling. “Yeah, I think that’d be a good idea too. We can definitely be there in a few minutes. I can call the boys. Yeah, alright. See you soon, then.” And with that, he hung up.

“So what’s the plan?”

“We’re going out for dinner to celebrate meeting the loves of our lives.” He brought your hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to each of your fingertips. Then, he stood up and pulled you to your feet. Being a skater, you were pretty short, but especially standing in front of him like this, forced to tilt your entire head up to make eye contact with him. He kind of loved it. A lot.

“What?” You chuckled at the look on his face.

Namjoon leaned forward and kissed your forehead, smiling against your skin. “You’re so cute.”

“Hushhhhh…” You blushed, turning away in an attempt to hide your burning cheeks.

He laughed and took your hand, and soon enough, you were sitting at a large table in a steakhouse in the Olympic village surrounded by the US skating team and BTS. It was insane. Only a week ago, you had been home skating at your local rink and now you here, in the center of the world’s focus with your friends, and now, your soulmate.

Namjoon made sure you tried everything at the table and helped you figure out what you did and didn’t like. He gushed about your skating and how you were definitely going to do amazing in you competitions the next few days. You tried very very hard not to fangirl about him and his music and his rapping, but you couldn’t hold it in for long, and long story short, you both ended up flustered and grinning like idiots. It just about gave the others cavities from how sweet you were.

After dinner, you went for a long walk with Namjoon, looking up at the stars and watching your breath puff up in clouds in front of you. His hand was tight around yours, and he couldn’t stop looking at you. You couldn’t stop looking at him either. He was just so freaking handsome. You couldn’t believe he was all yours. God, how had you gotten so lucky?

Namjoon, ever the gentleman, insisted on walking you back to your room for the night. Surprisingly, when you opened the door, the room was still empty, your roommate nowhere to be seen.

“Oh yeah, my roommate probably won’t be back until tomorrow morning. She’s uh...been having some fun with the Canadian athletes...So I pretty much have the place to myself unless she needs anything from in here.”

“Are you okay alone?” He asked quietly. “I could uh…” Namjoon rubbed the back of his neck, looking down at you.

“Would you?” You asked quietly. You really didn’t want to say goodbye to him just yet. Yes, he was coming to all of your matches over the next week. Yes, you were sure you would see him tomorrow. Yes, he was your forever. But you almost couldn’t handle the thought of parting ways yet. You just needed a little more time. “Please?”

“Of course.”

Minutes later, you were both sitting awkwardly on your bed, Joonie in his boxers and t-shirt and you in sweatpants and a tank top. You were sitting with your journal in your lap, scribbling out everything that had happened that day. Namjoon pretended to be scrolling through Twitter, but really, he was reading over your shoulder as your pen glided across the lined paper.

“Don’t forget the part about me.” He smirked.

“How could I forget the most important part?” You leaned your head against his shoulder, shattering the touch wall that had gone up the moment you had both gotten beneath the covers. He rested his head on top of yours, smiling softly.

Namjoon watched your pink pen write out your account of how you met. “...and so I took a big breath and tapped him on the arm. I was so nervous. Like, my hands were shaking, my voice was shaking, I seriously thought I was gonna pass out. Plus, his face was covered, so it was really just an educated guess if it was even him or not but it was and...long story short, there were lots of tears (good ones!) involved. He’s so tall and handsome and sweet and I know he’s reading this over my shoulder right now, but I don’t even care.”

He started chuckling and kissed your cheek a few times, quick little pecks that caused you to giggle.

“Much Love and goodnight, (Y/N) (L/N) <3.” You closed your journal and set it along with your pen on the nightstand.

As soon as your hands were free, Namjoon wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you into his lap. You rested your head back against his shoulder, exhaling a long sigh. God, your parents hadn’t been kidding about soulmates. They were definitely worth the wait. He pressed a long kiss to your neck, his arms holding you tight.

“I didn’t think it was possible to love someone this much.” Namjoon’s deep voice murmured against your skin.

Your heart raced and you closed your eyes, completely swallowed up in bliss. “It’s like I’ve known you my whole life.” You whispered, your voice quiet in the large room. Somewhere in the distance, you could make out the music of what was no doubt a party. But you were much more content here, in the arms of the man you were going to spend the rest of your life with.

***

The next morning, Joonie woke up a few minutes before you did. You had fallen asleep curled into his chest, your hair a tangled mess, (h/c) strands strewn across the pillow. Your breaths came out long and even, and as he watched you sleep peacefully he found himself falling deeper and deeper in love with this perfect little skater who had Lutz’ed her way into his heart.

Eventually, you blinked a few times and looked up at him. He brushed the hair out of your face so he could look into those beautiful eyes of yours.

“Today’s the big day.” He grinned when he saw you were finally awake.

You grinned at how his voice sounded in the morning, even deeper than it usually did and just a bit raspy. “Yesterday was the big day. Today is just the icing on the cake.”

The two of you got dressed and went to breakfast together. Namjoon’s hand barely left yours, and before you knew it, you were headed over to the rink for the big event. Today, you were skating the Short Program, and tomorrow, you had your Free Skate. You met up with your coach and headed to the warm-up area to stretch, get into costume, and so on and so forth. Namjoon had found the other boys in their spot in the crowd. They had a big sign with your name on it and they were decked out in Team USA stuff. The Shib Sibs had given the boys knitted hats with their names on them, so they were rocking them at the moment.

Once your hair and make-up was finished and you were in costume, you re-emerged, wearing your skates with covers over the blades. As soon as they let you, you were out on the ice with the other skaters, running through bits of your routine. Every time you passed the boys, they screamed. You made out Hoseok’s high-pitched wailing above the others, and it made you laugh a little.

When you were done and waiting for your turn, you sat on the bench jittery as all hell. Your hands were shaking, and every time you looked out at all of the people sitting there watching, let alone all of the people watching from home, your heart did a backflip. You grabbed your coach’s attention and asked quietly if someone could go get Namjoon. Although you weren’t exactly sure how, you knew that having him with you would help with your anxiety.

And you were right. As soon as he emerged, a concerned look on his face, something inside you clicked and you felt somewhat at ease.

“Are you okay, baby?” He asked, wrapping his arms around you and cradling your head.

“Better now...” You exhaled a shaky sigh and wrapped your arms around him.

“You’re going to do great. I know it.” He kissed the crown of your head.

“I’m sorry, I just needed you.” You whispered.

Namjoon held you a little tighter. “Don’t be sorry for that. I’ll always be here when you need me. I promise.”

***

“So, I thought today we’d do things a little differently.” Namjoon had started a VLive a few minutes before, but he had been waiting for stragglers who had just gotten the notification. “I want to introduce you to someone. We’re here in PyeongChang for the Olympics and I ran into someone I’m sure you’ve seen a lot of lately.”

You caught Namjoon’s eyes from off-camera and laughed. “Is that my cue?”

“Come here.” He held his arms open and you walked into the line of the camera and into his grasp. “ARMY, this is (Y/N). (Y/N), ARMY.”

“Hello.” You waved nervously. “I’m um...I’m Joonie’s soulmate. So yeah. Nice to meet you.”

“Show them your shiny new medal, baby.” He grinned, so ready to brag about his amazing soulmate and her amazing accomplishment.

“Joonieeeeee~” you whined, your face reddening.

He cupped a hand around his mouth and leaned towards the camera like he was telling the ARMYs a secret. “She won the gold.”

You laughed and gave him a playful shove. “Well, the only gold that matters to me is the name etched onto my wrist.” You flashed the now-gold symbols of Namjoon’s name and he beamed that beautiful dimple-kissed smile of his and pulled you onto his thigh, resting his chin on your shoulder.

“She IS perfect, isn’t she?” Namjoon read over the comments that were steadily flowing in. “I keep trying to tell her that, but she just won’t listen.”

“Okay, but when the most perfect human being on the planet tells you you’re perfect...I just...You’re so perfect, Joonie.”

He smiled softly and looked at you with a galaxy glistening in his brown eyes. “I think we’re perfect for eachother.”

[cloud17dreams]

Trouble In Paradise (Jeonghan)

Note: Requested! I hope you like this, shy cloud!

- Admin Mochi ✨

Jeonghan stabbed at his phone’s keyboard in annoyance as he heard your giggles from across the practice room. Joshua’s mellow voice followed suit, encouraging you, as you tried strumming at the guitar in your lap again. The long-haired boy couldn’t help himself and allowed himself to glance up through his eyelashes.

You both were sitting against the mirrored walls but you were sitting close- too close. Joshua had his arms around you, guiding your fingers across the neck of the instrument, teaching you to how to strum to the beat. If either of you could feel the heat rays coming from Jeonghan’s eyes, you didn’t show it. Jeonghan bit his lip in contempt as Joshua grinned at you.  

One more smile and I might cut the strings on that guitar….

Slight guilt and surprise at his thoughts washed over Jeonghan as he ripped his gaze away from you and Joshua. He was usually such a pacifist, the mom friend of the group of known as Seventeen. And it wasn’t like you were his; he had no right to be mad.

Yet….he was. And Jeonghan just couldn’t deny it anymore- he had a crush on you.

It had begun five years ago, the moment you became a Pledis trainee and a month before Seventeen was set to debut. You were new to the place and Jeonghan could still remember the cute expression of uncertainty on your face as you walked through the third level, trying to find the other members of your group.

Jeonghan had been lounging outside of the practice room, drinking from a plastic water bottle, when he saw you. You were lugging a small duffel bag and wearing silver running shoes. Your hair was tied up and you wore no makeup- a typical look for hours of training- but Jeonghan thought you were quite beautiful without all the cosmetics.

“Are you okay?” Jeonghan called out to you. Usually he didn’t reach out to strangers but he couldn’t help himself- you just looked so confused. Your head snapped up to face him and you pursed your lips sheepishly.

“Um….” You drawled out. “Do you know where I can find PR 301?” PR was short for Practice Room.

“It’s right here,” Jeonghan pointed at the small sign behind his head. “But I think you mean PR 103. That’s where all the other girls are.”

“Oh,” You thumped your head with your hand in a “duh!” gesture and grinned, giving Jeonghan a bow. “Thank you, sunbae!”

Jeonghan grinned back at you and watched as you dashed off to the stairs, to make it in time before the instructor called you off.

The next time he saw you, it was a week later and you were all alone in the practice room. You were sat on the floor, rubbing your sore ankles. When Jeonghan came inside, you looked up and the boy could swear his heart skipped a beat. You immediately stood up, bowed, and apologized as you picked up your bag but Jeonghan stopped you.

He introduced himself and you did as well and soon, the two of you were sitting across from each other and talking. Despite just meeting you, Jeonghan had managed to get you venting about everything: how hard and risky trainee life was, how you missed home so much, how you didn’t think you were skilled enough to be a noteworthy idol. In return, the Seventeen member told you his burdens and gave you advice.

By the end of it all, the smile was back on your face and Jeonghan decided then that he always wanted to see you happy. A few minutes later, one of your members came looking for you, and you took your leave but not before thanking the long-haired boy for everything.

Ever since that day, Jeonghan was always the one you first one you ran to. And maybe that was why he felt protective of you. He was your best friend, your first opinion, your confidant. Not anyone else. It had been this way for five years.

But five years later, Jeonghan found himself always imagining your smile when he was supposed to be singing or eagerly awaiting your presence after you finished practicing for the night. You had become more than a best friend to him and you didn’t even know it.

Jeonghan ran his fingers through his black locks and pulled his hood up, trying to block out the sounds of your voice asking Joshua about a certain chord. Staring down at his hands, he wondered. Would you ever know his feelings? Would you two ever be something more?

It was common knowledge that relationships between Korean idol’s were almost taboo- especially if you were still considered new. Fans would get out of control, album sales would drop, stress would ensue, hate mail would be sent in every form. Falling in love was dangerous in this world and one should always tread carefully.

As Jeonghan mulled over this, frustration began to rise within him. He had no idea what to do. And the most ironic thing was that the one person he wanted to tell this all to…..was the one person he couldn’t.

Not able to take any of this, the young man shot to his feet. The huff of anger that left his lips was almost inaudible but when you looked up, you could see the dark look on your best friend’s face before he turned away.

“Jeonghan? Where-”

Without listening to you, Jeonghan walked out of the room and slammed the door behind him. He kept walking, walking, walking- until he found himself on the rooftop of Pledis Entertainment.

The slender boy leaned against the walls and looked down at the city. Bright lights that never went to sleep twinkled before his eyes and cars rushed past. People were still outside, walking to somewhere unknown. Jeonghan could see some fans standing around the entrance of the building, hoping for a glimpse of their idol.

With a sigh, Jeonghan turned his back on the city and just stared down at the ground. A cool gust of wind blew across his face, clearing his mind a little. He closed his eyes and just relaxed, listening to the rush of vehicles and the occasional shout of a vendor owner…..

The raven-haired boy was so caught up in his serenity, he didn’t hear the sound of the roof door opening then closing shut. It wasn’t until he heard footsteps advancing did he realize he wasn’t alone.

“Hey.” You said with a small smile when Jeonghan lifted his head.

“Oh…” Jeonghan straightened up. “Ah. Hey.”

You joined Jeonghan’s side and copied his way of slumping against the wall. The air is quiet yet heavy. With curiosity, with anxiety, with admiration.

“So….” You started and glanced over at your best friend, who refused to look at you. “Jeonghan….are you alright?”

The answer was clipped, taut. “Yeah, I’m fine.” Your best friend mumbled to his shoes. Knitting your eyebrows in disbelief, you leaned down a little to meet his familiar brown orbs. But he averted his gaze, his pupils sliding to the left.

“Liar.”

Jeonghan bit his lip and shrugged. “It’s really nothing, Y/N.”

You crossed your arms over your chest. “Then why are you avoiding me?”

Silence.

Chuckling, you unfolded your limbs and tucked your hands into the pocket of your jeans. It’s painfully silent before you break the tension. “You know you can tell me anything, right?”

The boy let out a sigh of defeat. “I know…”

“But?”

“But?” Jeonghan echoed, giving you a puzzled look.

“Usually when people sigh like that there’s a ‘but’ in it.” You answered with a knowing smile. Your face then softened and you reached out to take Jeonghan’s hand, like you had done a million times before. He doesn’t pull away when you take it, rubbing circles into the back of his hand with your thumb.

Jeonghan swallowed, feeling his heart race. To tell or not to tell? It was hard to think with your light massaging. A few seconds passed before he made his decision: he wasn’t going to lose you.

Your best friend takes a deep breath, causing you to look up at his beautiful face. You had always harbored a crush on Jeonghan and sometimes, you just didn’t think it was fair. Talented, understanding, funny, and he was good-looking. It was no wonder he was considered one of the more charismatic Seventeen members. You’d never be able to compete with all the other pretty idols and fans.

Or so you thought. Because the next words that came out of the angelic boy’s lips was not what you expected.

“Y/N, I think I like you.”

Jeonghan felt the feather-like movements on his smooth skin cease. He looked over to gauge your expression- which was blank, as if you were trying to figure out if you heard correctly. Finally, your eyes slowly looked up to meet his- and you could tell he meant it.

You were clearly speechless. The more the silence stretched on, the more nervous Jeonghan became. Would you run away from him? Would you avoid him? Did he just let five years of friendship go down the drain?

Hating himself, Jeonghan tried his best to do damage control. He laughed but it was transparently fake. “I-I mean, if you don’t feel the same way….that’s okay. I just wanted to let you know. You know, since we’re so close and….secrets…..” Jeonghan sighed then pushed his back off the cold concrete wall. You were still standing there, eyes staring down at your sneakers. “I guess….I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

The slim boy began to walk away but felt himself get jerked backwards. Jeonghan glanced down at your hand on his wrist then up at you, hope in his eyes. You looked as if you were internally trying to make a decision- your eyes shifted side to side and your teeth were biting down on your bottom lip.

“Jeonghan.” You began and took a breath, nervously looking up into his eyes. A small smile graced the boy’s lips as he reached out a tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. His hand hovered near your temple before he placed it gently on your cheek, cupping your face. You closed your eyes and resumed talking. “I think…..I think I like you too.”

Confetti and streamers filled Jeonghan’s heart until it finally burst. His sweet smile turned into a full-on box-shaped grin of delight, the first thing you saw when you opened your eyes. And soon, you were being pulled into a hug. You giggled, returning his embrace before you both pulled away.

His hands were both on your face as Jeonghan hesitated. You gazed back, knowing what he wanted. You smiled and nodded before slipping your eyelids shut once again.

The five seconds it took for Jeonghan’s lips to find yours felt like five years. But came, it did. First came the smell; minty with a hint of chapstick. Then came the feeling; his lips were as soft as a cloud, as gentle as a raindrop. And finally, then came the aftershock; your heart kicking up to a hundred beats per minute as you kissed the boy back, the growing smile that was threatening to break the kiss.

Soon, you both were giggling instead of kissing, foreheads pressed against each other. Jeonghan’s eyes blazed into yours, his chocolate orbs melting your heart like it did many times before.

“Guess we should start with dates for now?” Jeonghan questioned softly. “And keep us lowkey?” Us. You quite liked the sound of that.

You nodded in response. “It’ll be hard….but it’s a start.”

“Great.”

You two pulled away and Jeonghan took your hand in his, chuckling to himself. You raised an eyebrow at him, silently asking to explain himself.

The boy shook his head in amusement. “It’s just….I thought you might’ve liked Jisoo.”

A look of slight horror dawned on your face to which Jeonghan questioned. You laughed nervously as you replied. “Um. Well. I’m not saying he’s ugly, it’s just that….Joshua….is my cousin.”

Cousin?

Jeonghan’s eyebrows flew up in surprise and stayed there while you recounted the story. You and Joshua had just found out last month, when your mom came to Korea with Mrs.Hong. Second cousins, but related was related.

“Wow….” Jeonghan drawled in disbelief when you were done. “So….you’ve been spending time with him because….”

“We were family-bonding.” You confirmed, a smirk forming on your lips when you registered the relief on the boy’s soft features. “Awww. Jeonghan….were you jealous?”

The boy gave you a haughty look before he ripped his eyes away from you. In other words: yes, he was. You grinned and triumphantly poked his cheek.

“Stop.”

“Admit it.”

“Admit what?”

“That you were jealous.”

Jeonghan scoffed. “I wasn’t jealous.”

You rolled your eyes and reached up to squeeze the boy’s pale cheeks, pulling his face from side to side as you talked. “Whose jealous cutie are you?” You asked in a sickly-sweet tone, the kind one might use with a dog or a newborn.

“Okay, I can see how you and Jisoo are related now.” Jeonghan muttered in playful annoyance and you laughed, letting go of his face. “But seriously. Dinner tomorrow? We can drive to that café near your dorm.”

You nodded and took your best (sorry, boy) friend’s hand. “Sounds good.”