#there's no way I couldn't have fell so hard for those novels

[nataliaphantomhivesblog]

Corruption & Trust

Stormbringer and bsd spoilers in general ahead so read at your own risk!!

So in this post I will be listing all the times Chuuya used corruption and all the times Dazai was there to stop it. I will also go into depth as to why Chuuya trusts Dazai when it comes to having to use corruption and I will also emphazise on Dazai's care and how he takes corruption seriously.

1. First time using corruption: Stormbringer

Chuuya and Dazai's age: 16 yrs old

"Isn't it an unpleasant sight, Chuuya."

It was a young boy. This young boy casually caught hold of Chuuya's arm and lifted it up. With this movement, the gravitational field which had occured around them disappered immediatly. As well as Chuuya’s agony.

"Y...You..."

"You can't even die gracefully can you?" the young boy said in a raspy voice as he heaved Chuuya on his shoulders. He set off to walk.

Alright so this was the first time Chuuya's corruption was ever activated, after Dazai nullifies it and carries Chuuya on his back, he drops him off outside the bar were Chuuya's friends lay dead. He took him there instead of taking him directly to the port mafia quarters.

Why did he do that exactly? If Dazai doesn't care for Chuuya, then why did he give Chuuya the opportunity to pay farewell to his dying friends?

It's actually sort of funny because I don't really think Dazai really realizes or accepts that he feels a certain connection with Chuuya and therefore looks after him.

2. Second time using Corruption: Stormbringer

Chuuya and Dazai's age: 16 yrs old (obviously, its still the same light novel lol)

After losing his strength, Chuuya drifted in the air for a few seconds, then lost the black wings on his back and slowly fell.

Dazai caught his body.

From the spot where Dazai touched, the nulification skill was activated.

The self-contradictory skill that supports the energy of the singular point receded, and the output of the singular point decreased. Eventually, it converged and the "gate" closed. The red imprints disappeared from Chuya's whole body. Eventually, the gravitational field disappeared and the complete silence was restored.

“Good job, Chuuya." Dazai chuckled, looking at Chuuya he was holding in his arms. "I forgot to bring my ink pen, so I'll spare you from having your face scribbled."

As much as it looks like this is from a fanfiction, I can assure you that it's an actual passage from stormbringer.

I can't really say much except the fact that Dazai is being extremely soft here.

And this was the conversation Dazai and Chuuya shared beforehand:

"There is one problem." Dazai cut off his sentence hesitantly. "It has nothing to do with the sucess rate of the plan. It is a matter we have to overcome in the end but... It may require some time to decide."

"What's with you?" Chuuya raised his eyebrows at Dazai. "Stop dramatizing it. Just hurry up and say it."

"I said earlier about this control spell to open the 'gate' that is used to reset the command inside Chuuya, right?" Dazai spoke with a strangely restrained voice. "If we use that, the logs of the command formula that were written in the past will be erased. That means...even if the memory erasure was used on Chuuya in the past, the traces of that will be erased as well."

"What?"

"I told you before right? the memory erasure command. The only way we can confirm if Chuuya is human or not is to check the history to see if the memory erasure command was ever used. It means..." Dazai looked at Chuuya with eyes that he had never looked at him before. Those eyes were serious. "If we use that control spell, the method to confirm if Chuuya is an artificial personality created by a string of code, or just a normal human being, will be lost. For good."

The time had stopped.

Chuuya opened his eyes and looked towards Dazai but his eyes were not seeing anything. The wind blew between the two of them. Even so, Chuuya did not blink.

"Verlaine became like that because he was tormented by the curse that he was not human. That only is enough of a big problem. The matter of being human or not." Dazai looked at his pocket watch, gave it a glance and continued. "I can delay the time until the plan starts for about two minutes. I will send an order for my men to wait... You can think about it alone for a while. Cuz I guess its hard for you to collect your thoughts with me around."

Having said so, Dazai turned away and walked down the stairs, leaving Chuuya alone.

Dazai fixated in his pocket watch. Two more minutes. Too short for a life decision. But he couldn't afford more than that.

Inside Dazai's head, he was planning a procedure to swith to an alternative plan in case Chuuya refused, at a tremendous speed.

After this exchange, Chuuya does decide on using corruption. I have talked about this section on a previous post of mine, and I just love it so much. For starters, I think this conversation that these two shared is very important to their characters.

For Chuuya, it shows us how undeniably selfless he is. He would rather save the people of Yokahama instead of finding out something that meant a lot to him. He sacrificed his own desires to save the people he cares about.

For Dazai its a completely different story, in this exchange Dazai was able to openly express genuine concern for his partner. He also understands the gravity of the decision Chuuya has to take and therefore leaves the decision up to him.

Third time using corruption: Dragon's Head Conflict

Chuuya and Dazai' s age: 16 yrs old

During this one, Chuuya demands to know where his friends are, and Shibusawa says all six of them killed themselves after being caught. Enraged, Chuuya activates Corruption which ultimatley ended the 88 day conflict.

There isn't much to say about Dazai and Chuuya here since there isn't really an aftermath on this occasion but I bealive this picture is enough.

Before reading the DA manga, I genuienly thought that the only time Chuuya ever rested on Dazai's lap was when they were 22 but this proved me wrong.

I mean this is a minimal thing to point out but if Dazai disregarded Chuuya he would've just left him there, right? But instead he remained with Chuuya and allowed him to rest on his lap, in the picture you can also see he is putting Chuuya's hat back on. It's such a simple gesture but it shows us how caring Dazai can be when it comes to Chuuya using corruption.

Fourth time using corruption: Lovecraft Battle, Double Black reunion

Chuuya and Dazai's age: 22 yrs old

This is personally one of my favorite times in which Chuuya uses corruption. The fact that these two had not been working together for 4 years yet they still managed to not only accomplish their mission, but mantain their trust for one another.

I find what Chuuya says here extremely ironic because if anything, the choice has always been up to him. Dazai always uses corruption as a last-resort trick and its always Chuuya who makes the final decision of using it or not, even in a life or death situation Dazai won't take it upon himself to force Chuuya to make the decision if they will be using it or not, and hes always willing to come up with an alternative plan in case Chuuya refuses. (an example of this is when Chuuya used corruption for the 2nd time in SB).

I think the reason as to why Dazai takes corruption extremely seriously is because during stormbringer he was the first person to even see Chuuya use corruption and also the person who understood how corruption will always be sort of like a burden to Chuuya, since it was thanks to corruption that his "am I human?" question stayed unanswered.

He knows how it feels to struggle with your own humanity and he doesn't want for Chuuya (who he literally sees as human), to hold that inner conflict with himself because of corruption.

Anyways, Chuuya decides to go through corruption trusting that Dazai will be there to nullify it.

And of course, Dazai does nullify it.

And after Dazai nullifies corruption, we get this very touching moment between both of them.

This is the first time Chuuya openly admits to trusting Dazai, although it was always evident that he trusts him, I just love how open he is being here.

Also the light punch he gives to Dazai's chest is such a sweet gesture, I see it as a silent way for Chuuya to say "I trust you because after all this time I still see you as my partner."

Dazai's smile in that small pannel is one of the most genuine expression we have gotten out of him. What he says is also a very sweet, I love that he calls him partner. The fact that these two are literally in rival organizations yet Dazai still calls him partner, it shows us that even after all these years he still can't help but see him the same way as he has always done.

Actually in Japanese he calls him "Aibou" and from my understanding, when you use the term Aibou it's for someone who you consider yourself to be close with. It means "partner" like in english but it holds a deeper meaning. If Dazai used the word "nakama" it would have been a very diffrent story since it means partner as well but it isn't used for someone you share a significant connection with. Asagiri's play with words here says a lot.

Fifth time using corruption: Dead Apple

Chuuya and Dazai's age: 22yrs old.

Of course I have to talk about one of the most iconic moments in the history of Soukoku.

Chuuya uses corruption to save Dazai, even if Ango says that he's dead for sure. Something I find very intresting here though is that Chuuya screams for Dazai while he is on corruption, he is obviously not supposed to be self concious about the whole situation, while on Corruption clearly he is not supposed to be in sane state of mind, as we all here know, Chuuya loses control and does not have the track of reality while under his own ability but this time, while using corruption, the one and only thing that was on his mind was "Dazai."

It wasn't only Chuuya who entrusted his life to Dazai, Dazai too entrusted his life in Chuuya's hands. When Dazai came up with this plan, he was more than certain that Chuuya was going to save him. And I think a tumblr blog pointed this out but when Chuuya uses curroption, he cannot control his strength, but when he had to punch Dazai he did it lightly, which is strange considering he was using curroption and it would've made a lot more sence if Dazai ended up decapitated due to being punched by a literal god. Dazai had to have faith in the fact that Chuuya will somehow be able to control corruption, even if its just a little bit.

Afterwards when Chuuya manages to rescue Dazai, Dazai gently touches his cheek to nullify corruption and greets him with, "You used Corruption believing in me? I am so touched I could cry." Chuuya groans, and replies that yes he did, that he believed in his disgusting vitality and craftiness.

When they both fall to the ground, Dazai forces Chuuya to rest in his lap because he didn't want to have to protect him from this situation since the fog is still up and Chuuya himself is all worn out and wouldn't be able to fight. But heres the thing, both Chuuya and Dazai's abilities can't be seperated by the fog. I mean Dazai's ability is nulification so it basically cancels out, and Chuuya hosts a literal god inside him so it isn't really an ability if you know what I mean.

So in reality, Dazai just wanted Chuuya to rest. Dazai could've literally just left Chuuya in the fog if he was only using him for his goals, but he was genuienly appreciating Chuuya's trust in him. The way Dazai's hand is resting on Chuuya's hair is a nice gesture too, he is greatful for him and he is moved that someone trusts him, it is shown throughout the Fifthteen and SB light novel that no one trusted Dazai and how most were afraid to even approach him. And in the ADA, everyone is somewhat warry around him (excluding Atsushi ofc). But Chuuya literally puts his life on the line trusting that Dazai will always be there to save him. He trusts him greatly and Dazai knows that, and I think its pretty clear to us that he would never want to break that trust.

The fact that Chuuya trusts Dazai even after he left the Port Mafia without an explanation or goodbye shows us how strong their bond is. Chuuya most likely trusts Dazai because deep down he knows that he isn't using Chuuya's ability out of his own selifshness, a part of him is aware that Dazai uses corruption as a last resort but he just doesn't want to admit it, and I feel like he also trusts him subconciously because of how gentle Dazai is after Chuuya uses corruption.

I really hope we get to see more of these "corruption moments" because in all honesty, these moments are the ones that bring out the most vulenrability for both characters. The moment corruption is used, we see the inmeasurable amount of trust and care these two have for each other that they won't show in other situations. During these times it always shines a very open and bittersweet light on their bond and I love it so much.

[letters-to-lgbt-kids]

My dear lgbt+ kids,

After I wrote about the good things that happened in 2021, I also wanted to write a personal "year in review" post. I learned some life lessons this year that I want to reflect on - as always, feel free to skip this one if personal updates aren't your cup of tea.

(Content warning: mention of mental health issues)

So, here are some lessons I learned this year:

- Sometimes things just suck and there is no beautiful message hidden in the pain... and that's okay.

I went through a mental health crisis in 2020. I survived it - but the first few months of 2021 were still hell for me. While I left the panic attacks and depression behind me, the insomnia only got more severe in the new year. Severe as in going 72 hours without any sleep at all, passing out from pure exhaustion for like 3 hours and then going 72 hours without sleep again.

This was hard on me for the obvious reasons: I was so tired that my entire body hurt, so tired that I couldn't focus on anything anymore, so tired that it made me cry in public... But it was also hard because I kept trying to see the beauty in the pain and there just wasn't any. I tried to unlock the hidden message in my suffering and it only made me feel worse. I felt like a failure for not getting stronger from the pain.

I sleep well now - and I didn't fix my insomnia by finding some deep secret message in it. Quite honestly, I don't know how I fixed it. Life sucked for a while and then it just got better over time. And maybe that's the whole point.

Maybe I didn't get stronger or better from the experience... and I didn't need to. I just needed to carry myself through that storm. It was worth going through it and not giving up, not because I came out enlightened but because I came out alive. I am here now and that's all that matters.

- I can still do great things when I don't feel great (and I will feel grateful that I didn't put my life on hold)

I look back at those months and remember the pain and all the tears... but I can also look back and see strength. In the midst of that storm, I finished and published my second novel. How did I do that? No clue! I just did it. I probably did it in a Zombie-like state but I did it.

I look back on older posts here on my blog and I think "Wow, this is a good one" and realize I wrote it during that time. I probably wrote that post with tears in my tired tired eyes but I wrote it.

I hear myself say "I really fell in love with watching gay Thai dramas this year" or "This is the year I found out that songs in languages I do not understand give me that Happy Music Feeling without the sensory overload" and think to myself, hey, I learned new things about myself and found new ways to bring happiness into my life... and all that during a hard time. Insert the "Go little rockstar!" meme here!

- ... but it's also okay to put some things on hold.

I am glad that I didn't put my whole life on hold, not only because it means that I can look back and see some rays of light in those dark months. It also made it easier to get better. As my sleep slowly got better, my energy increased too - and I didn't have to spend that energy on picking up the broken pieces of my interests and happy things because I didn't drop them.

With that being said, I took a break from writing. I wanted to start my third novel right after publishing the second one. Writing is very much "my one thing". I have been writing for as long as I remember, it's basically part of my identity. But I needed a break. It was difficult to accept that at first but it was the right step for me. Putting this one thing on hold allowed me to not drop everything else.

I started to write again in late 2021 with new energy and fresh ideas.

- I love my stupid little life and doing my stupid little things and being my stupid little self.

My break from writing (and in a weird way even my mental health crisis) made me realize that I don't need be productive or successful to be happy. The trouble with having "my one thing" being writing is that my self-worth is tied to it (I am sure the artists reading this can relate!). Writing is after all something mensurable: How many pages did I write? When that number suddenly fell to zero, I realized how much I had been telling myself that this number is my internal permission to be happy ("I need to write to be allowed to love my life"). But that's a lie! I am allowed to just be happy to be alive. I am allowed to be happy doing "useless" things like re-watching my favorite Thai series for the sixth time.

I realized I don't actually have that goal of becoming a widely known, super sucessful writer. I always felt like I need to have some big career ambition like everyone else seems to have, I need to want a big life. But I love my stupid little life the way it is. I want to be alive and do things that make me happy. I don't need any goal beside that.

I purposefully used the word "stupid" here. It is a slur for disabled people - and 2021 is the year I decided to reclaim that for myself. I beat myself up for not being smart long enough. I was always terrified of people hearing me talk/seeing me do things "wrong" because they might think I am stupid... but guess what? I am stupid and that's okay! I am kind and loyal and passionate about stuff and funny in my own way and I am also very stupid.

Learning to not only accept but to embrace and to love myself as a disabled person has been an ongoing theme in my life over the past few years and I feel like I made a lot of progress with that in 2021.

One reason for that is I found out that I am autistic - I knew I had a social-emotional development disorder before but I just learned this year that this diagnosis falls on the autism spectrum. This new bit of knowledge actually helped me a lot as there is just so much more information available on autism as on my specific diagnosis. It may seem like it's just a technicality but it was a deeply empowering thing for me.

With all my love,

Your Tumblr Dad

[amynchan]

Sorry to bug you but can I ask for your take on the relationship between Jiang Cheng and Jin Ling? Like. Any thoughts.

You are never bugging me, like, ever! XD I love getting my brain picked! (even when my brain is a slush of "I love this character so much!")

Ok, but Jiang Cheng and Jin Ling. I actually really like their relationship! It's flawed, it's good, and I will eat it up! I'm gonna answer this by breaking it up into "Jiang Cheng," "Jin Ling," and "Their Dynamic."

Jiang Cheng

Ok, I gotta start off with my dude. XD It's no secret I love him, and I'll rag on him till the day I die with oodles of affection. On the surface, the most anyone can say is that he's hard on Jin Ling and loves him. This is true, but I spent a good chunk thinking about why that is, and it dawned on me: Jiang Cheng isn't raising Jin Ling in a vacuum or alone.

So, the first one. Obviously, the events of Jiang Cheng's life as he perceived them (losing his entire family, the betrayal of Wei Wuxian, having to rebuild the sect, scrapping for rep) will affect how he raises Jin Ling. Jin Ling is the only family he has left, and he's been proven to put his family as first as he can. Jiang Cheng, when he has Jin Ling, looks like he doesn't let this kid out of his sight under normal circumstances. When he did send Jin Ling off, it was due to the fact that Lan Wangji was in his presence, and Jiang Cheng hates Lan Wangji because, to him, Lan Wangji is the reason his family fell apart (true? Nah. Does he think that way? Yeah.) Otherwise, Jiang Cheng would have stuck by Jin Ling's side during the nighthunt. He went after Jin Ling toward the end of the book as well, and he makes a dig at "do you know who your family is?" when Jin Ling didn't come back to him and instead went to Jin Gungyao.

Which is the second half of this: Jiang Cheng isn't raising Jin Ling alone; he's co-parenting with Jin Gungyao. Jin Gungyao, who is diplomacy and gentle smiles and gifts and affection and the things that Jiang Cheng just isn't naturally. Jin Gungyao clearly has Jin Ling's affections (again, the kid ran to him when Jiang Cheng said not to come back if he couldn't find anything), and seems to be really indulgent. I think Jiang Cheng is trying to pick up the slack. Where Jin Gungyao is indulgent, Jiang Cheng is strict. Where Jin Gungyao has distance, Jiang Cheng is close. They raise Jin Ling so oppositely that it's basically good-cop, bad-cop, with Jiang Cheng being the bad cop.

I do have a couple of things regarding Jiang Cheng that I do want to say, tying together the "family first" and "competing with Jin Gungyao." The first time we meet Jin Ling, it's revealed that he's got 400 spiritual nets all over Dafan mountain, and Wei Wuxian immediately assumes that the Jin clan was the one to pay for those nets. The truth is that the Jiang sect paid for those. Jiang Cheng paid for those, and they actually cost the sect quite a bit to have. When going on the night hunt, Jiang Cheng provided both the means and the support to give his nephew the best chance he could. He was definitely too strict on him (Not Even Gonna Defend That), but the fact is that what he does do, he does because Jin Ling is all he has left, and he loves him.

He's just an angry purple grape about it.

Jin Ling

Jin Ling is one that I didn't pay too much to when I was reading the novel. I didn't look for how he felt about much of anything, and I took what was given to me. I knew him as a part of a bigger plot, as a character, and his interactions with Wei Wuxian, but I didn't give too much thought into how he reacted to Jiang Cheng. I figured he was the kid who will 'grow up to learn his uncle was wrong, turn his back on his spoiled upbringing, and end up befriending the uncle who was wronged,' as the narrative goes. Roughly, he does this more-or-less, but how he acknowledges Jiang Cheng is interesting.

Jin Ling does seem to fear Jiang Cheng in a sense. Jin Ling knows that his uncle will never hurt him (and he won't), but he does fear disappointing his uncle. Like, 'if I disappoint him, it's the same as disappointing my own father' levels. Again, he runs off to Jin Gungyao when he can't live up to Jiang Cheng's expectations, and he claims to have been so upset that he couldn't eat well. While the claim is swiftly shot down by Jiang Cheng (and then backed up by Jin Gungyao, so who's to say what's the truth?), saying this does indicate that Jin Ling at least knows that Jiang Cheng's first concern is Jin Ling's health and safety. He's also not so afraid that he wouldn't dare run his uncle around for the greater good (read: when he helped Wei Wuxian escape).

These two things show me that Jin Ling knows where his uncle's priorities are, and he knows that he himself is pretty high up there. He does trust his uncle, and he does love him, even if he's terrified of letting him down.

For most of the story, Jin Ling is also going through a series of changes and revelations. Jiang Cheng is wrong about Wei Wuxian, and Jin Gungyao eventually tries to kill him. His entire world is being upended, and I figure that I don't get much about Jin Ling's normal state until the end, when things have settled, because that's when we see the worry that Jiang Cheng has for Jin Ling reciprocated. From what very little I can remember (it was the end of the story, my heart was too full of emotions!), Jin Ling is facing down most of the devastated Jin sect and power hungry wolves on his own because he doesn't want to trouble his uncle, who he knows is going through a shocking aftereffect himself. Jin Ling doesn't think that Jiang Cheng needs the extra hassle, and Wei Wuxian is the one to encourage Jin Ling to rely on Jiang Cheng because Jiang Cheng wants to be needed by his own family.

As far as Jin Ling goes, that's what I have. He's not scared of being hurt by Jiang Cheng, but he is scared of disappointing him, which I think is huge.

Their Dynamic

The angry, bad-cop uncle and the somewhat spoiled, pushed-too-hard nephew. Jiang Cheng's presence in Jin Ling's life is important, and while the two do bumble around each other (Jin Ling's fear of disappointing Jiang Cheng and Jiang Cheng's inability to show positive reinforcement unless they're in a life-or-death situation), they do love each other. Jiang Cheng fears for his nephew and wants him to be safe, but he also wants him to be strong. Jin Ling is afraid of disappointing Jiang Cheng, but you can only be that afraid if you actually do love in return.

They need help, and I think Wei Wuxian, towards the end, is helping a little bit by giving Jin Ling a little insight. Jiang Cheng will need a lot of help on his end to lighten up, and I think with Jin Gungyao gone, he won't have to play 'bad cop' so often and be forced to give more positive reinforcement. But hey, that's just what I hope. XD

Anyways, thanks for waiting for this! I wanted to do this question justice, which is why it took so long, and I hope you enjoyed my take on it! *^_^*

[oingo233]

You Are Beautiful (1)

Summary: Sirius Black was entranced since the moment he saw you. He had to have you but you are convinced his feelings are fleeting, and will only hurt you. People inside and outside of your relationship meddle in the makings of something that could be beautiful... or disastrous. Will love and confidence win? Or will doubt and uncertainty tear you both down?

Young Sirius Black x Pus SizedFemReader

Warning: one inappropriate joke lol, fluff I suppose and nothing else really. All the real stuff comes later :0

Authors note: I mostly write my xreader fics as neutral but as this is a request, I wrote this as fem. But if anyone would like a male version or neutral version let me know and I will copy this but obviously change readers gender (and it's no burden to me I'd love to make more readers feel included and represented). Also reader is plus sized and she is confident and strong throughout the fic -because plus sized characters aren't represented like that in film/books alot (but if looking for amazing and empowering plus sized female characters Nina Zenik from Six of Crows owns my entire heart and changed how I saw myself personally and I would recommend that book for anyone really)- but as any human she has her insecurities because beauty standards are unattainable and have a way excluding so many people and making us feel less than beautiful. As a plus sized/overweight person myself, I understand how we have to fight to feel beautiful and fight this internalized bias we have when we look in the mirror. But WE ARE BEAUTIFUL. WE ARE WORTHY OF MAGAZINGE COVERS AND COMPLIMENTS AND ABOVE ALL SELF LOVE!! The self insert character in this has fought for her confidence, but it will shake and stumble throughout the series and Sirius and friends are there for her to help her realize for herself how beautiful she truly is, once again. So I hope I didn't stray too far from the request :) Enjoy....

Word Count: 1.8

Authors Note: About halfway through I decided to make it a series oops-

****Blabbering Idiot****

Sirius Black is a man of many, many words. In fact, I'm sure if he was writing this he could quickly turn it into one of the most entertaining novels ever written. He'd describe the laughter of his friends for a whole page. Tell a hilarious joke on the next. Then he'd describe the wind blowing through the open halls and courtyard and the spring sun. He could write about a great many things in great detail. (But he wouldn't because he doesn't quite enjoy writing as much as he does anything else, but that's above the point.)

As I said, Sirius Black is a man of many words. So it was such a curious thing when he first saw you. It was an astounding thing really, because for the first time he found something that rendered him completely speechless.

The sun was peeking through the open corridor and pooled onto you, caressing your skin and hair in an ethereal glow. Highlighting curves that brought both sinful and sweet thoughts running through him. It was as if the universe was telling him, look at what we've created, look at this beautiful creature. But he could hardly believe that this world could create something so lovely and kind. You threw your head back in laughter at something your friend said and suddenly the world is back to normal and all he can hear is your laughter and the sound of his friends curiosity at what could have possibly kept him from the conversation about muggle rock compared to Wizard bands. In fact, James was so passionate about it half the hall turned to listen to his rendition of The Chain by Fleetwood Mac.

But he didn't care, he took a feeble step towards you and suddenly felt so nervous his hands began to sweat. He stuttered and coughed up his words just for a simple "hello" in your direction only for the wind blowing through the halls to carry it away. And his friends laughed at him as he watched you walk too far from where he wanted you. Because, oh did he want you.

Sirus POV:

"I'm telling you, I won't be able to sleep tonight unless I know who she is," Sirius says for not the first time that evening. James started to laugh.

"Why? Because you'll be too busy thinking of her?" James said, laughing as he made a very suggestive hand motion. Peter cackled and Remus rolled his eyes, trying to find the cleaner side of his humor but instead he couldn't help but snort. Sirius pushed James's shoulder.

"Yeah, I'm sure Lily would love to know how familiar with that feeling you are," Sirius says and James stopped laughing immediately, his eyes narrowed.

"Please, you wouldn't dare. And I will deny all accusations, you'll be made out to be a liar. Then the mystery girl will never love you. Is that what you want, Pads?" James joked with a single arch of his brow. Sirius just rolled his eyes. He was only half paying attention, he has been scouring the hallways since he first saw that girl. He wanted to speak to her again, or maybe just stare for a bit. If things went well, he'd be able to do both those things on a date. But he hasn't seen her since that morning and his heart felt oddly shallow. He wanted those butterflies he had when looking at her to come back and overwhelm him again.

"What'll it matter if I don't even know who she is? Or- or if I can't talk to her? No one falls in love with a blabbering idiot," Sirius says. Remus shrugs.

"Lily fell in love with James," he says, Peter laughed again.

"Yeah, regardless of what he does at night," Peter added and now both James and Sirius were rolling their eyes. James and Lily just recently stopped denying their feelings for one another and gave into the sexual tension and mutual pining. Their relationship was still fairly new but they act as if they've been together for years. Sirius supposed that in a way, they have been.

Sirius would watch them giggling, hand and hand in the hall. He'd see them cuddling in the common room, or coming back after dates with rosy cheeks and beaming smiles. Sirius would never admit it out loud, but his heart cried out when he saw them like that. He rarely ever felt lonely. He could have any girl or boy he wanted if he really tried, but for what? One fun night? Only for one more morning where he wakes up alone? He wanted more than that whenever he saw Lily and James, their happiness was palpable. Their love was suffocating.

Sirius always thought he'd find the one after Hogwarts, if at all. But when he saw her... well that changed everything. In a flash he saw himself with her, their hands intertwined and her head thrown back in laughter. Rosy cheeks and bruised lips. Warm beds and making love... being in love. He nearly felt silly after and yet, he knew that even if he did sleep tonight, it would be her he'd dream of.

"Ello' guys!" Lily said, bouncing up to James who kissed her cheek. They walked with their arms looped and Sirius glared at the easy sign of affection. He thought of his parents, how they would be stiff with one another except for in quiet moments, when he'd pass through a hall and glance into their room. He'd spot a quick kiss on the cheek, and soft squeeze of the hand. It were those odd moments for him, that struck him so strongly with a sharp bitterness. They don't deserve softness and love, he'd think, how can such cruel creatures even feel such things? But even then, he'd walk away seeing them as still awful creatures born from the depths of hell, but more human.

"That's her," Sirius whispered so quietly Remus almost didn't hear it. In fact, Sirius didn’t think Remus heard it at all, but it was rather his look of longing towards the Great Hall entrance that gave him away. Because standing right there, was you.

Your hair was a little wind blown, messy around your face, bits of iit shaped your round cheeks and soft eyes. Sirius eyed you up and down and cursed clothes and cursed shyness and cursed his own head for thinking he could even talk to you. But most of all, he cursed a group of boys who walked past you.

Sirius was a confident boy, he knew how to spot someone who held their head up just as high as he did, and you were very much one of those people. You were giggling as you stole a biscuit from a friend and popped it into your mouth, you covered your mouth as you laughed when they complained with a little smile of their own.

"It's just so yummy, and I haven't eaten since breakfast." He heard you say, your friend just shook his head and handed you a plate as you sat down next to him. But right before you could get comfortable a sneering group of boys stole a piece of food from your hand and said something rather rude.

Sirius didn't even realize he had been walking towards you, this girl he has never even spoken too, yet thought of so endearingly, until he was standing right before the boys and had the pack leaders wrist firmly in his grip.

"Drop it boy, c'mon, drop it," he teased. It was humiliating for the boy and he knew it by the laughing and sneering others directed towards the group of boys, but Sirius did not care. The boy dropped the biscuit and looked as if his tail was tucked into his legs. "Good boy," he said, ruffling his hair until it was a knotted mess, the boy winced at just how hard Sirius dug his knuckles into his scalp, Sirius relented with a satisfied smirk.

Sirius’s voice took on a much harsher tone, "Now scram." The boys were out of their seats and in new ones within seconds.

Sirius felt his mood shift completely once they left, because now all eyes were on him, yours included. He looked up at you rather shyly, his hair falling in strands over his forehead. He tucked it behind his ear and found some confidence in the way your eyes followed the movement and how you blushed. He gave you his best smile, hoping his charm wasn't as weak as his legs felt at that moment.

"Hello, I'm Sirius... Sirius Black." Then, like an idiot he put his hand out for you to shake, what charmer just shakes the ladies hand? He stopped belittling himself the moment you softly placed your hand in his.

"It's nice to meet you, Sirius, and thanks for helping me. I know how to handle those filthy 'dogs'" you said, smiling as you remembered the way he spoke to them, he chuckled. "But I suppose it's nice not always having to," you finished with a bright smile on your face. He felt his own cheeks heat up and he nodded but could not think of anything better to say.

"Name," he said, you raised your brows. He cleared his throat, "your name?"

"Oh, how rude of me," you said and then you laughed, that same laugh that caught his attention and has yet to let go. "I'm (y/n) (y/l/n)."

"Nice to meet you," he said, it was as if he couldn't feel the appalled stares of your friends because all he could see was the blush on your cheeks and your head thrown back in laughter. He swallowed thickly before making his way back to his friends. They all wore raised brows and smirks, and he knew they were about to bite into him.

"Treating them like dogs, really? A bit ironic don't you think," Lily said, James shrugged

"That's why it was so good," he said, high fiving Sirius.

"But it admittedly went downhill from there," Peter was sure to add, just like Sirius knew one of them would. Sirius just laughed, too elated to finally know who you were.

"Don't start," he said, but it was too late.

All in union they sputtered out the lame word that will plague Sirius' memory of that moment forever, "Name?"

They cackled at him and ruffled his hair all the way to their seats, but Sirius knew they were pleased for him. And Sirius didn't mind, he could feel the pretty eyes of a pretty girl following him across the room. If only someone told him how important she would become to him, maybe he would have looked back at her and never looked away.

Taglist <3

@enchantedblackrose

[johnsamericano]

𝓓𝓪𝔂 7:

тєи ℓєє

23 days of NCT masterlist.

taglist: @notbeforelong @curieouscapt @whathamelon @unknown5tar @ajhdr @silent-potato

warnings: the reader is soon-to-be engaged to someone 12 years older, virginity loss, extreme lack of experience from the reader, dirty talk, Ten’s a sweetheart 😭

“He’s here!” Your mother clapped her hands excitedly, asking the butler to answer the door.

You sat with both hands squeezed on your lap. You’d never seen a male tailor, let alone be dressed by one. Would it be uncomfortable? Just as your mind was about to drift away, a man with at least four rolls of fabric entered the room.

“Good evening, my lady.” Was he even real? He looked straight out of a painting, just like the ones hanging on your wall.

“Good evening, sir.” You bowed your head gracefully, just like you'd been taught to do.

“There’s no need to be so formal.” He smiled cheekily, his eyes disappearing just the slightest and making your heart flutter with excitement. “Let us have a seat and chat a little about what kind of dress you'd like.”

Everything went so naturally with him, from sitting down and talking about the event you'd be wearing the dress to, to his hands surrounding your waist, taking your measurements.

“I was thinking of something white, my lady. After all, the goal is to get a certain gentleman to ask for your hand, isn't it?”

“How did you...?”

“Your mother is quite a chatty lady.” You sighed. She certainly had trouble keeping things a secret, the whole town probably already knew by now.

“Then I guess you already know we've known each other since we were kids, well, since I was a kid. He's twelve years older.” You sounded so excited talking about that guy that it made him smile. “Are you married, sir?”

“God, no!” He was quick to explain. “I want to devote myself to work, that's what makes me happy.”

“But imagine yourself, waiting for your beautiful bride at the church, ready to join your lives for what is left of them. Just to think about it gives me goosebumps.” To him, what you'd just said sounded like agony. Dedicating himself to another person for the rest of his life? He’d rather jump off a cliff.

“I just don't think I'm good husband material, that's all.”

As the days passed by, you got to know him better. He’d often tell you about his job, how many dresses he'd confectioned that week, how much money he'd earned, every single little detail of it. He made it sound like a dream, he spoke so passionately about it that you wondered whether you'd ever find something that would make you feel that same way.

“Good morning, my lady.” He kissed your knuckles, a devilish grin extending through his lips as he admired your flustered face. “I’ve got a surprise for you.”

He extended a big, white box with a red velvety ribbon keeping it closed.

“That was fast!” You opened it to reveal a pretty, lacy dress. It was exactly what you’d asked for, but then why did you feel so sad?

“What is it, my lady? Do you not like the dress?”

“No! I love it.” He smiled, pulling out the dress from it’s confinement to let you have a better look at it. It was, indeed, beautiful.

“Would you like to try it on?”

You soon found yourself behind a room divider, slipping the soft dress on. The texture was marvelous, like wearing a cloud. It would definitely draw Johnny’s attention, that’s for sure.

“How do I look?” You stepped out, spinning around to let his critic eyes have a look at his masterpiece. He squinted his eyes as if he wasn’t pleased. “What is it?”

“Your corset.”

“Huh?”

“Truth to be told, I knew this dress wouldn’t work with a traditional corset, so I might have made a special one for the occasion.” You walked to the full body mirror, taking a look at yourself.

“It looks fine to me.”

“You look too innocent, my lady.” You furrowed your eyebrows, eyes connecting with his through your reflections. “This dress wasn’t made to make you look innocent, but to make you look like a sophisticated, upper class woman.”

You went through your options and finally decided to listen to the expert.

“Do you happen to have that corset at the moment?”

“Yes, but the problem is, only I know the right way to adjust it. Would you be okay with me doing that?” You could feel cold sweat running down the back of your neck.

Only your mother and some servants had seen you naked, but never a man. It wasn’t supposed to happen unless the couple was married. However, you felt the urge to accept his proposition.

“A-alright.” He nodded, keeping a straight face as he started undressing you.

He slowly started undoing the ribbon that kept your corset in place. Still in front of the mirror, you could see his concentrated features, not looking at anything but your back. Your mounds were finally liberated, and for a split second, you could see the tailor’s eyes staring at them.

“Raise your arms please.” Was he really not going to do anything? This was the part when the two main characters exchanged a heated session of kisses according to the novels you'd read. But he kept the same stoic face all the time.

“Ten?” This was the very first time you'd called him by his real name, well, his nickname.

He didn't seem bothered by it, concentrated on adjusting your corset.

“Yes, my lady?”

“Am I not attractive?” His hands accidentally tightened the ribbons too much, making you wince.

“Sorry.” He apologized, loosening the piece of clothing. “But why are you asking me this?”

“Well...” You were ashamed to admit it, but your curiosity got the best of you. “Aren’t men supposed to go wild over breasts? At least that's what I heard.” Ten would've never expected such an inappropriate comment from you, though he couldn't say he didn't like that new boldness of yours.

“I guess so.”

“Then why didn't you go wild over mine?”

The room was filled with nothing but silence for a couple of seconds before he finally found an appropriate answer for your question.

“I’ll ask you something first.” you nodded. “If you knew men had a thing for breasts, then why did you let me do this?” You would've liked to say that it was because you deeply trusted him, but you both knew that deep down, it wasn't completely true.

“I don't know.”

“Did you want to seduce me or something like that?” You were about to reply, but his deep laugh interrupted you. “Well, since you answered my question, I shall answer yours.” he finally finished adjusting your corset, placing his hands above the curves of your waist and leaning down to whisper something. “You have the most beautiful breasts I've ever seen. They look round and soft, the perfect size to hold them with my hand. But I can't allow myself to go wild over you, not when you're about to get engaged to someone else.” So the things wrote in novels weren't entirely fantasy, things like that did happen in real life. “Trust me, I wish nothing but to pinch those pretty, perky nipples and have you begging for more. But we can't.”

“Yes, we can.” With a newly found courage, you guided his hands up until they reached your mounds. They did, in fact, fit perfectly between his hands.

“My lady-”

“Y/n.” You held his hands against your warm body. “Please, my name is y/n.”

“Stop playing with fire.” His voice had become lower, hands shaking the slightest under yours.

“I want you to play with me, Ten. Use me, do whatever you want with my body. Alleviate the ache I'm feeling between my legs.” That was his breaking point.

His expert fingers quickly undid the knots, allowing his hungry eyes to have a look at your naked torso.

“Touch me.” he turned you around, so you were directly facing him.

“So greedy.” His hands covered your chest once again, this time with no fabric in between. His palms felt so warm against your skin, you couldn’t help but sight. “Tell me, how does your little cunt feel?”

“I-I’m sorry?” His right hand went down, rubbing circles over your undergarments. Immediate relief washed over your body.

“Do you know what an orgasm is?” You shook your head, gasping as his fingers pinched your hard nub. “It’s the only way to relief the ache you feel here.” He tapped your entrance with his middle finger, feeling your wetness under his digits.

“How can I have one?”

“You’ll have to trust me, alright?” His dominant demeanor had changed to a softer one, kissing your jawline as hands sneaked inside the fabric, a new, pleasant feeling making your legs shake. “How does this feel?”

“Nice.” He retrieved his hand, you whined at the loss of contact. “Hey!”

“Jump.” He instructed, lifting you up with both of his hands below your thighs. He guided you all the way to the nearest wall, your back pressed against the concrete surface. “Sorry for this.” He muttered before ripping your undergarments apart.

Skillfully, he lowered his pants, his hard member springing up. The moment his tip started slipping into your whole, an immense amount of pain made you scream.

“Stop!” Ten frowned, pulling away but still holding you against the wall.

“Have you changed your mind about this?” There was a hint of pain peeking through his voice.

“It hurts a lot.” As if to back up your words, a small tear rolled down your cheek.

“I know, sweetheart. But that's the way it's supposed to be.” If it hurt so much, then why did people do it so often? “You just need to get used to it and it'll start feeling better, I promise.”

“Really?” For you, it didn't make any sense.

“We can stop whenever you want, just give it a try.” You hesitantly nodded, letting him align with your entrance once again. “Deep breaths, darling.”

It was the worst pain you'd ever felt, even worse than that time when you fell off a horse. But just like the tailor had said, that unpleasant feeling was soon replaced with something else...something that made your tummy feel warm.

“You're doing so well.” He praised as if he wasn't the one doing all the hard work while you held onto his shoulders. “How are you feeling?”

“Like I need to pee.” You gasped, letting your head rest against the wall.

“Don't hold it back, darling. It means you're close.” His large hands caressed your sides, holding you tightly.

“Ten...” You whimpered, biting his clothed shoulder to stop yourself from screaming in pleasure. Something inside you exploded, making your body shake in ecstasy.

“Y/n.” You both whispered your names, pleasure taking over your minds.

“May I kiss you?” There was no response from him, his length still pulsating inside you. “If you don't want to that's-”

“Kiss me.” Your lips came closer to each other, barely millimeters away when a loud knock abruptly interrupted the moment.

“Miss y/n, Mr. Seo is here to see you.” Johnny, you'd completely forgotten about him.

“I guess you better get dressed.” He pecked your cheek, setting a fire inside you.

“I'm sorry.” He helped you put on your dress again, smiling at the sight of you trying to stop your and his essence from dripping down your bare thighs.

“Don't be.” Ten fixed your hair, proceeding to gather his stuff before sending a wink in your direction. “I guess I'll see you in a week to help you get dressed...my lady.”

[nakachuchu]

Sourdough Bread | Nanami Kento

SYNOPSIS: You bake sourdough bread with your father figure.

READER: gender neutral

WORDS: 1056

WRITTEN: 02/05/2021

NOTES: Thank you for requesting!

You were one of Gojo’s first years, and while you enjoyed his company, he wasn’t exactly the father figure you expected.

However, Nanami was the father figure you expected. He was mature, calm, and kind to those who didn’t annoy him.

You didn’t have a father figure growing up, so it wasn’t a surprise you were so attached to Nanami.

He would have considered you another Gojo because of how attached you were to him, but you were more respectful. Plus, you were essentially a child compared to him.

He often invited you to his apartment to bake bread with him. It was a hobby you both enjoyed—eating bread, not the making of it.

Today, he invited you over to make sourdough bread. You both knew it was one of the most difficult breads to create, so you two were determined to make it as perfect as possible for your first try.

He was whisking together two-hundred-fifty grams of water, one-hundred-fifty grams of sourdough starter, and twenty-five grams of olive oil. You were waiting for it to be incorporated before adding five hundred grams of bread flour and ten grams of fine sea salt.

Nanami’s sleeves were rolled up and the two of you wore matching aprons with a panda print on them. it was a gag gift for Christmas from Panda, but you both loved it.

Nanami placed the bowl onto the countertop and squished the mixture together with his hands until the flour was fully absorbed.

“Is it supposed to look like that?” you questioned.

“Touch it.”

You poked the mixture. “It’s dry.”

“It’s supposed to feel dry and rough. We’re doing it right,” he said. “Get plastic wrap.”

You cut a piece of plastic wrap and covered the bowl. The two of you walked over to the two-sided sink and washed your hands together.

“How long do we let it rest?” you asked.

“Thirty minutes,” he answered, handing you a towel to dry your hands.

“Thank you."

To pass time, Nanami read you a novel. You would have fallen asleep if he hadn’t nudged you now and then while he was reading.

“Now we have to work it into a ball in the bowl,” he instructed.

Now your sleeves were rolled up as you worked the dough. Once it was kneaded properly, you covered the bowl again and let it rise at room temperature.

“What exactly is room temperature?” you asked.

“Well, this recipe calls for sixty-eight Fahrenheit or twenty Celsius,” he explained. “This room is around there, so it should be fine for the dough."

“When will it be ready?” you asked, peering at the dough like a child.

“When it’s doubled in size. It could take up to twelve hours.”

“Huh? That’s way too much!” you exclaimed.

He chuckled, placing his hand on top of your head. “But it could also take only three. It depends. Should we get started on dinner?”

“Okay! What are we making tonight?”

“Soba noodle salad, teriyaki salmon, and baked tonkatsu,” he answered.

Your mouth watered. “Let’s get cooking!”

The two of you cooked dinner together, occasionally checking on the dough to see if it doubled in size yet. Making a big dinner for two took almost three hours, so you two decided to eat after deciding the dough wasn’t ready.

Your legs were swinging back and forth, feet kicking as you took the first bite of the teriyaki salmon. Nanami smiled at how happy you were.

“You should have become a chef!” you exclaimed.

“Unless I was famous, I wouldn’t have made good money.”

“I guess that’s true. Oh, well, at least, I get your food all to myself,” you said.

The two of you took your time eating dinner, occasionally talking. By the time you stored the leftover food away, the dough looked ready.

To be honest, you were a bit tired from being up on your feet in the kitchen all day, but you enjoyed sending time with Nanami.

“Now what do we do?” you asked.

“Remove the dough onto a lightly floured surface, then cut it in half to make two loaves. It’ll fit in my oven easier that way.”

You nodded and did as he instructed. “Next?”

“Start at the top and fold the dough over toward the center. Turn it slightly and fold over the next section of dough. Keep going until you have a full circle."

He watched as you did what was told, occasionally guiding your hands. Once finished, he grabbed an oven-safe pot from a cupboard and lined the bottom with non-stick parchment paper before placing the dough inside.

"How long does it need to rise?" you asked.

"Half an hour," he answered as he slid the pot into the oven and closed it.

"Read to me again?" you questioned.

"You'll fall asleep."

"Please?"

Looking down at you, he couldn't help but give in and nod due to your puppy eyes. The two of you settled down on the couch. He opened the novel he was reading earlier and began reading.

Eventually, you fell asleep. He knew you were going to fall asleep. He closed his book and slashed the dough down the center to allow the steam to escape while it baked.

He placed the lid on top of the pot and reduce the oven temperature to four hundred Fahrenheit for twenty minutes. After twenty minutes, he removed the lid and continued to bake for forty more minutes.

When the bread was ready, he took it out of the oven and left it on the cooling rack for an hour.

He spent that hour debating on whether or not to wake you up. It wasn't necessarily late, but you looked so comfortable on his couch. In the end, he decided to wake you up because he knew how excited you were.

"Hmm?" You rubbed your eyes. "Is it done?"

"Yeah, come on."

He helped you get up from the couch and into the kitchen. You smacked your cheeks in an attempt to wake yourself up.

"It looks good!" you exclaimed with glittering eyes.

"It's proof of our hard work," he said. "We can eat it tomorrow. It's late."

You pouted.

"I'll drive you back to the dorm," he offered.

"Fine, but I want a big piece of the sourdough tomorrow."

He smiled. "I can do that."

[h0tch-r0cket]

Infatuation (18+) {a.h.} : chapter 5

summary: you needed a job. aaron hotchner needed a babysitter. the rest was inevitable.

word count: 5.5K

warnings: explicit language, drinking alcohol, smoking, building tension : )

table of contents

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

"Y/N?" Jack called out from the kitchen of the Hotchner home. You had picked him up from school, like always, and he was working on his homework as soon as possible.

"What's going on, Jack?" you asked as you placed your finger in between the pages of your copy of The Centaur which you brought with you to keep you occupied.

"I need help with my math," he said softly.

You put your bookmark in the novel and headed into where the little Hotchner was awaiting your help. You sat down across from him and glanced down at the papers that were sprawled out in front of him. "What do you need help with?"

"Well, Ms. Kingston showed us today how to add and subtract with three digit numbers like 100 and all that stuff. I get confused when you have to borrow from one of the other numbers when you subtract," he said as he tapped the pencil on the table, a habit you noticed Aaron did as well when he was working on his own work.

"Alright, let me take a look here," you said as you grabbed the paper from him.

After a few minutes of explaining the way you go about subtracting the numbers to Jack, he got it pretty quickly. "Thanks, Y/N!"

You ruffled his hair as you stood up from the table. "You got it. If you need me, I'm just going to be in the living room, okay?"

"Okay," he said as he moved on to the next parts of his worksheet.

You settled back onto the couch, bringing your knees up to your chest as you read the novel. You were just reaching one of your favorite parts, your attention glued to the pages in front of you. It was the part where George, the father of the story, had spent his very last dollar to bring home a sandwich for his wife even though he and his son were stranded for the night because their car broke down. There was something about the sentiment, the idea that he would give up his very last dollar, that always warmed your heart.

Just as you finished up the chapter you were on, the small pitter patter of feet coming into the living room interrupted you continuing on with your reading. You looked up from the book to see Jack coming towards you, taking hard steps as he walked.

He plopped down on the couch next to you and let out a low sigh. "What's the matter, kiddo?" you asked as you placed the book neatly on your lap.

"I want dad to come home already," he said quietly as he swung his legs against the side of the couch.

"I know you do, Jack. But hey, he should be here soon. Want to watch a movie in the meantime?" You weren't sure what else to do for him. It was the first time that Jack had ever expressed that sentiment to you.

He nodded his head lightly, not saying anything to actually answer your question verbally. "Alright. As long as you finished your homework," you told him. He simply nodded yet again, his face more somber than normal.

You tried to figure out why he had the sudden mood change from when you picked him up from the bus. You thought maybe he was just tired or perhaps he wasn't feeling good. You knew that most kids always wanted their parents around when they were sick.

As the different possibilities ran through your head as you looked for a movie that the two of you had yet to watch, Jack's small voice piped up from next to you. "Y/N?"

You turned your head to look at him to already be met with his gaze. "Yeah Jack?"

"Can I sit with you?" he asked softly.

You nodded your head and straightened yourself up more on the couch so he could sit on your lap. As he quickly scooted into your lap, your copy of The Centaur fell underneath the couch.

"Sorry Y/N. I'll pick it up," Jack said as he went to reach down and grab it. You pulled him back up towards you and let his back rest against your frontside.

"It's alright. I'll get it later. Pick out a movie to watch," you told him. You passed him the TV remote and let him scroll through the different family movies, hoping that he would find something to occupy his thoughts until Aaron got home from his lectures.

------

As much as he tried, Aaron Hotchner could not focus on the lecture that he was giving in his class. As he sat at his office desk at the university, he flipped through his notes which to anyone else other than him would not have made any sense at all with the way that the thoughts were not cohesive and the exhaustive amounts of abbreviations that littered the pages.

He planned the day's lecture to be about Orpheus and Eurydice, lovers tragically torn apart, but he couldn't gather his thoughts cohesively to provide his students with what he deemed to be the proper lesson.

His thoughts were foggy. Jarbled. He thought he would have shaken the thought of the way your hands touched the day prior. But it was all he found himself thinking about. He wasn't quite sure why. It was a simple accident.

A simple accident that made him want to rethink the way he had been so closed off with you. The way he was always curt. He craved more, despite the fact that he knew he shouldn't pursue anything with you.

He rubbed his temples, sighing in defeat. At that point, the lecture was going to be what it was going to be.

Aaron gathered all of his things in his satchel and headed down to the auditorium before his students filed in. He shed himself of his suit jacket, leaving him in a baby blue dress shirt and tan slacks. He organized his notes yet again and placed them in order on the podium that was in the center of the room.

His students filed in soon after, a chorus of Good afternoon, Professor Hotchner, How are you Professor Hotchner? coming from them.

Aaron gave everyone a few minutes to settle in before glancing at his watch for the time. He clapped his hands together once loudly to get the attention of the class. The side conversations slowly died down, only a few soft murmurs being heard through the crowd.

"Alright folks. Let's settle in. I know today is Friday and you all are eager to get out of here so I'll try to make this as quick and easy as possible," he said, projecting his voice so that everyone could hear him. "I'll run through attendance quickly and then we'll get started."

After taking attendance and marking the absentee students, Aaron grabbed the textbook for the class from out of his satchel. "If you all could open to page 265 that would be absolutely fantastic." Synchronous opening of textbooks and flipping of pages filled the auditorium as the students quickly followed Aaron's instructions.

He began to walk in front of the room, arms crossed over his chest as he glanced out into the sea of students. "Now, does anyone have any ideas as to what the story of Orpheus and Eurydice is about?" He looked into the crowd, being met with blank stares, eyes glazing over, and even a few students nodding their heads back as they fought the calling of sleep during class.

Not one student raised their hand. He caught the students glancing at one another, hoping that someone, anyone, would have the answer. But there was no such luck.

Part of him wondered if you knew the story. You probably would know the tale like the back of your hand, being that you seemed to be meticulous with whatever it was that you set your mind to. He was curious to see just how much you knew about mythology.

He decided that the next time he saw you, he would try to find out just that.

Focus, he thought to himself.

Clearing his head of you as much as possible, he rolled his sleeves up and walked to the whiteboard, uncapping the black Expo marker that laid next to it. "Orpheus," he said as the marker squeaked on the board as he wrote the name down, "is the son of Apollo and Calliope. Well, that is according to some accounts. Some people say that Orpheus had a different father," he clarified. Aaron turned his attention back to his students, pushing his glasses up on the bridge of his nose. "Can anyone at least remind me as to who those two figures are in mythology? Apollo and Calliope?"

A hand rose in the middle of the auditorium slowly. "Yes?" he said, letting the student know that they could answer the question.

"Well, Apollo is considered to be the god of poetry and music. Calliope on the other hand, was one of the nine muses. She was the muse of history," the girl answered.

Aaron shook his head, placing his hands on his hips and he continued to pace back and forth in the front of the room. "Close. Calliope is actually the muse of poetry. Clio was the muse of history," he explained. "But I'm sure you knew that, right Ms. Sinclair?" he said with a small smirk on his face.

The girl nodded and scribbled down some more notes in her notebook, frantic to capture each and every word that Aaron uttered throughout the rest of the lecture.

Aaron took a brief pause and scanned through the crowd yet again. When he noticed one of his students clearly scrolling on his phone rather than focusing on the lecture, he debated about whether or not he should say something. But when the student started to show his phone around to those near him, he knew he would have to address the obvious distraction from the lecture.

"Mr. McMillan, if your phone is more important than listening to the rest of this lecture, which does cover a large part of your final, please be my guest and take the rest of the day for yourself," Aaron said as he raised his hand towards the door, suggesting that the boy leave the auditorium. He watched as the boy's face turned a shade of pink as he slipped the phone into his pocket. Aaron mouthed a small thank you to the student and continued with the lecture.

"As I was saying, with the help of Ms. Sinclair, Orpheus is the son of Apollo and Calliope. Eurydice," he said as he wrote the next name down on the board and drew a line connecting the two names together, "on the other hand was a beautiful Spartan princess. She married Orpheus. He played her beautiful songs on his lyre, which is just a smaller version of a harp. Orpheus was an exceptional musician. But that makes sense considering who his parents were."

He leaned back against his desk, partially sitting on top of it. He crossed his feet and rested his hands on each side of him on the desk to hold himself up. "However, tragedy struck the young couple. Eurydice was bit by a snake and died. Orpheus was heartbroken. So much so that he only played the most somber and melancholy songs on his lyre. "

Aaron paused for a moment, letting his students jot down their notes onto their paper. "But that didn't discourage Orpheus from fighting for his true love."

Aaron pushed himself off the desk and started to pace again, rubbing his thumb against his pointer finger as he walked. "He was not willing to give up so easily. So, he came up with a plan."

He walked over to the whiteboard again and wrote the word Underworld on the board. "Now, what are some things you know about the Underworld?"

"It's Hades' domain," a student called out.

Aaron drew an arrow from the word and wrote Hades underneath it. "And Hades is?"

"Zeus' brother," the same student replied.

"Very good. What else do we know about this Underworld, the realm where the souls of the departed end up in Greek mythology?" Aaron probed.

"River Styx!" another student called out enthusiastically.

"Mhm." He added another line to the diagram and turned to face the student that answered. "What about the River Styx?"

"I don't know. I just know it's there," the student laughed.

"Fair enough," Aaron said with a small smile. "We'll be covering that within the next few lessons so I won't worry about drilling it into your heads for the time being. One thing that I do want to mention is Cerberus, the three headed dog that guards the entrance of the Underworld. That will be important for the rest of the tale of Orpheus and Eurydice."

Aaron paused yet again, settling back onto the top of the desk but this time he was fully seated on it, his legs dangling off the side. "Now, Orpheus, being heartbroken at the loss of his wife, came up with a plan. He decided to travel to the Underworld to try to regain his love."

"That's crazy. Who would want to go to that place? I mean, I get it he loved the girl but is that even possible?" a student asked.

"It was a wild plan, I will give you that. But Orpheus succeeded. He traveled to the Underworld and managed to strike a deal with Hades after playing his music for him. The ruler of the Underworld was so moved that he granted Orpheus his wish to bring Eurydice back to the land of the living. Hell, the stories even say that Cerberus, the ferocious guardian of the entrance of the Underworld, was howling in despair of the pain Orpheus' music suggested."

A hand rose amongst the crowd. Aaron took his glasses off, gently biting down on the end of the arm of them. He raised his eyebrows at the student, allowing them to speak.

"There's no way that he got her back that easily. Greek mythology seems to, for the most part, at least stem from some kind of tragedy," the student said, clearly not believing that the tale would end happily ever after.

Aaron took his glasses out of his mouth and shook them in the direction of the student. "Excellent observation, Mr. Roth. That brings us to the next part of our tale. Hades gave Orpheus a stipulation; his wife would be brought back to the land of the living as long as Orpheus did not look back at her while they were still in the Underworld."

He hopped off his desk and hooked his glasses onto the collar of his shirt as he continued with the lecture. "Orpheus made the journey back to the light, but he turned around too soon, full of excitement to be reunited with his wife. She vanished before his eyes and he was heartbroken yet again."

"So the moral of the story is to be patient and have trust in the situations that you find yourself in?" a voice called out.

"Precisely," Aaron said, his voice soft. He glanced down at his watch. "I think that's enough for today. For the next class, think of a time in your life where this story applies. A time where you were impatient and lost something that you worked so desperately hard to get. Class dismissed."

The students filed out of the room quickly, allowing Aaron to follow behind them with his satchel tucked under his arm, the same fervor coursing through his veins to get home. He wanted to see Jack.

He wanted to see you.

————

"Oh! You sank my battleship!" you hollered dramatically as Jack managed to get another one of your ships clear off the board.

"Yes!" he shouted, throwing his fist up in success.

You were happy to see him going back to his normal, happy self. Whatever was bothering him earlier had managed to subside by the time you were done watching The Lion King.

The familiar car alarm chirped in the driveway, causing loyal Buster to run to the door in anticipation to see his owner.

You felt almost the same degree of excitement flowing through your body. It was the first time you were seeing Aaron since his touch was embedded into your head. You were wondering if things would be different. If he would be different.

As the front door opened, Jack ran over to his father and wrapped his arms tightly around his waist. "Hey buddy," Aaron said with a small chuckle as he patted Jack's back.

"I missed you today," Jack said quietly as he looked up at his father.

"I miss you everyday," Aaron said with a smile. His gaze turned to you and he kept the smile plastered on his face. "How's it going, Y/N?"

"Pretty good. Jack just sunk my battleship...again," you joked, feigning annoyance.

Aaron's smile grew a bit wider, the dimples on his face making another appearance.

You couldn't help but smile at him. His smile was contagious and gorgeous. You felt like it was such a rare occasion that he smiled, even though he was smiling more often around you, that you always studied the way his face looked so you would never forget it.

Aaron headed into the kitchen with his things with Jack following close behind. You followed a few moments after, ready to gather your things and head home.

When you came into the kitchen, you saw Aaron place a hand on his hip as he looked down at Jack who held his hands together tightly in a pleading motion.

"Come on, Dad! It will be fun," Jack begged. He put on a big smile for his father, trying to convince him further to whatever idea he had planned.

"Alright, Jack. I wouldn't mind that. Ask her," Aaron said as he turned his attention towards you. You felt yourself get nervous, not sure as to what it was that Jack was about to ask you.

Jack took a step forward and planted himself in front of you as he looked up at you with big, puppy dog eyes. "Y/N, do you want to stay and have dinner with us?" Jack asked excitedly.

"Oh," you said with shock. Your stomach fluttered at the thought of actually staying and spending time with Aaron, even if Jack was still there. But the rational part of your head was yelling at you to leave. You already were thinking about Aaron too much and you were sure you would be even further doomed if you were subject to his charm and wit for the night. "Maybe another time, Jack. I think Esmé was planning on making a nice fancy dinner tonight."

"Please, Y/N," Jack pleaded. "Stay with us and eat." He held his hands firmly together again in a similar fashion to how he was begging his father to go along with the idea in the first place.

You clicked your tongue and scratched the back of your neck, unsure as to what other excuse you could come up with. "I don't want to intrude on the time you and your dad have together, buddy."

Aaron crossed his arms across his chest and you saw him raise his eyebrows for a quick second behind his glasses. "Stay, Y/N. I'm a pretty good cook," Aaron said with a smirk growing on his face.

You felt your stomach twist further into knots at the thought that one, Aaron wanted you to stay and two, that he was going to be cooking some sort of meal for you.

Aaron, on the other hand, felt desperate. He wanted—no, he needed you to stay. He wanted to learn everything there was about you. He wanted to know your passions, your fears. As his eyes searched yours, he saw the battle that was going on in your head as to whether or not you should stay or go.

He was hoping you couldn't see the way he crossed his fingers together subtly, a silent prayer that you would stay.

He didn't know what was coming over him. All he knew was that at that moment, he didn't want you to leave the house. He had tried to push you out of his head all day, but seeing you here at his house and your gorgeous smile, it was taking everything in his power to keep his composure as he felt himself succumbing to his desire to want to be close to you.

You weren't sure what it was but the way Aaron was staring at you, his eyes soft, it was as if he was subtly begging you to stay.

You knew you shouldn't. You already were feeling things that you never thought you would for the man. But a part of you was curious to try to figure out if he was feeling something similar.

"Alright, fine," you said defeated, throwing your hands up in the air. "I'll stay." Jack let out an excited yell before running back into the living room.

You could have sworn you saw Aaron exhale deeply once you came to your decision, as if he was relieved that you were actually staying. "But I'm telling you now Hotchner, if you're not as good a cook as you say you are, there will be hell to pay," you teased as you pointed your finger in his direction.

And to your surprise, Aaron laughed. He genuinely laughed. It was a sound that was pure music to your ears, something that you wished you could have turned back time to get it on a recording.

"I promise. I am a good cook," he said as he turned around and began to take out some different pots and pans.

You walked next to him and leaned up against the counter. "What exactly are you planning on making?"

He turned his gaze to you, a smug look growing on his face. "Well where's the fun in that? It's a surprise," he said quietly, leaning closer in your direction.

You caught a quick whiff of his cologne, the smell of cedar quickly filling your airspace. You bit down on your bottom lip, the closeness to him becoming almost too much to handle.

His warm honey eyes darted down to your lips and back up to your own eyes. He cleared his throat and stood back up straight, starting to pull some random ingredients out of the cabinet in front of him.

You shut your eyes for a second, disappointed by how quickly he stood away from you. "I'll be in the living room with Jack," you said. He nodded silently, making his rounds in the kitchen to cook.

As you made your way into the living room, you couldn't help but think about how close he was. You could have reached your hand out and stroked his cheek. You could have been putty melting in his hands.

Aaron watched you walk out of the kitchen, knowing that you wouldn't see his eyes raking across your body. Your perfume lingered in the space where you were in the kitchen, reminding Aaron just how close his face was to yours, how he could have pulled you by your cheeks to brush his lips against yours.

He wanted you. And he wasn't sure how much longer he could hold back.

———-

"Oh my god," you sighed in content as you took a bite of the food Aaron prepared. He made fettuccine alfredo with chicken. All from scratch.

His eyes shot towards you as he heard the sound of satisfaction fall on your lips. He raised an eyebrow at you, taking a bite of the chicken that rested on his plate. "So, did I live up to your expectations?"

"Mhm," was all you could muster as you took another bite of the pasta.

You watched as Jack twirled the pasta around his fork. He popped it into his mouth and gave his dad a thumbs up. "It tastes good, Dad. I could eat the whole pot!"

"That's an awful lot of pasta," you joked as you took a small sip of the chardonnay that Aaron had poured for the two of you. He insisted it made the meal but you were wondering if it had different indications than what he led on.

"Yeah it is but I could eat it," Jack said. Aaron rolled his eyes jokingly at his son's active imagination.

A few minutes passed and you all were eating in content. This time, there was a much more comfortable silence that fell between you all, something that you could easily get used to.

"So, Y/N, what made you pick up an interest in Greek mythology?" Aaron asked, clearly ripping off the bandaid he had been gripping to all day. He had to know. He wanted to know more about you.

"I took a class in high school, actually. And from there, I've done most of my learning on my own. I don't know," you laughed softly.

God your laugh. Aaron would never get over hearing it. He took a sip of his wine and glanced at you over the rim of the glass, watching you absentmindedly twirl your fork around in the pasta.

"I just find it interesting that there's so many stories that they came up with and they all have some sort of deeper meaning to them."

Aaron nodded in agreement, finding himself entranced with your words. You were right of course. There were so many things those stories explained, like the natural world or even as something simple to not be selfish.

"That's why I like them so much. The interpretation of them all varies and you can learn so much," he added.

"I like the ones with Jason and the Astronauts," Jack interrupted. Small laughs from you and Aaron filled the space between you at Jack's mispronunciation.

"Argonauts," you and Aaron said at the same time, correcting the young Hotchner.

Jack scrunched his eyebrows in confusion. "What's the word?" he asked.

"Argonauts," Aaron repeated.

"Astronauts is cooler," Jack concluded as he took another bite of his chicken. "Can I be excused?"

Aaron glanced at his plate and pointed his fork in the direction of his son's food. "Eat another bite of chicken and you can be."

Jack scarfed down the chicken quickly and left the table.

Realization hit you rather quickly.

It was just you and Aaron. A tinge of pink fell across your face at the fact that you were alone with Aaron.

You cleared your throat and shifted in your seat, sitting up straighter. "So, how did your lecture go today?" you asked.

Aaron shrugged his shoulders and kept his gaze on his plate. "Could have gone better, I suppose."

"What did you talk about?" You took another drink of your wine and this time, it was you glancing at him over the rim of the glass.

"Orpheus and Eurydice."

"That's a good one. Heartbreaking in the end but I like the story of it all," you admitted.

Of course you knew it. Aaron figured you would. He wished you could have been in his class. You clearly knew so much about the subject matter and he was becoming impressed the more you spoke.

"It's definitely one of the sadder ones," he agreed.

You placed your fork down on your napkin, full from the delicious dinner you just ate. "I think it's one of the best representations of agape in Greek mythology that there is," you added, running your finger along the rim of your wine glass.

Aaron felt his nerves go wild.

Agape?

How the hell did you know about that?

You certainly kept him on his toes.

"And you know about agape, the Greek word for the concept of self-sacrificing love. I have to say, Y/N, I really wasn't expecting you to be so well versed in the subject," he admitted. "But figures, a smart girl like you would go above and beyond to learn about whatever you set your mind to." He took another sip of his wine and his eyes were looking at you more intently.

You definitely felt your face blush at his words. You tried to keep your composure as best as possible, but how could you when he was being so fucking charming and looking at you the way he was?

"I am just full of surprises," you teased, making your voice almost a whisper.

You watched as Aaron licked his lips and raised his eyebrows. "You most certainly are," he agreed, his words coming out with an exhale. "Question for you though."

"Hm?"

"What makes you think that the tale of Orpheus and Eurydice is full of agape?" he challenged.

You took a moment to try to cohesively get your thoughts together. Well, as best you could with the way Aaron was looking at you.

"Well for starters, the man literally went to the Underworld to try to get his wife back. It was an unheard of feat. And the fact that Orpheus was willing to do whatever it took to get her back just shows how much he couldn't live without her. How much he loved her."

Aaron nodded slowly, finishing the rest of his wine. "You make a good point there," he said after he swallowed the chardonnay.

You nodded in agreement. You couldn't believe that you were engaging in such a deep conversation with Aaron. But it felt so natural. So right.

You glanced at the clock, seeing that it was almost 9pm. "I think I better get going," you said quietly. You pushed yourself away from the table and placed your dishes in the sink.

When you turned around to go grab your things, you bumped into a solid mass.

Aaron.

He grunted lightly at the contact, a flicker of his smile dancing across his lips.

"Sorry," you said quickly as he looked down at you. You stared at him for a second, as he did to you, before pulling yourself out of your trance and stepping around him to grab your belongings.

"Not a problem," he said as he placed his and Jack's dishes in the sink. "Let me walk you out." You nodded silently and watched as he grabbed the pack of cigarettes off the counter.

He patted the bottom of the carton against his palm before taking one of the cigarettes out, resting it between his lips as he walked with you towards the door.

He opened the door for you and you turned to say your goodbyes.

As much as you truly didn't want to.

"Thank you for dinner," you said with a smile.

"Don't worry about it," he assured as he leaned against the doorframe, the cigarette bouncing between his lips with each word.

"Enjoy the rest of your weekend, Aaron."

"You too, Y/N."

You headed to your car, settling into the driver's seat quickly, your brain still reeling from the events of the night.

You glanced back towards the Hotchner home and saw Aaron still leaning against the door frame, the faint orange glow of the lit cigarette piercing through the darkness of the sky.

You pulled away from the house and headed back home, watching as the Hotchner home disappeared from your rear view mirror.

Once you got home, you opened the door and pressed your back against it, still shocked with the overwhelming feelings that were still in your stomach, your head. Everywhere.

Esmé turned her head around towards you from the couch. When she saw your shocked and speechless expression, a shit-eating grin grew rapidly on her face. "Spill...the...details...now," she demanded as you sat down next to her on the couch.

As you were retelling the way you and Aaron had a few more moments that night, your phone dinged.

"Don't be a fool! Answer it!" Esmé hollered, smacking her hand gently on your leg.

Your heart fluttered when you saw the name of the person texting you.

                                                   Aaron Hotchner

-You left your book here. I found it under the couch when I was straightening up.

                                -Oh, I totally forgot about it! Sorry! I'll grab it on Monday.

-The Centaur, huh? You really are a bit of a nerd when it comes to mythology aren't you?

                                            -Maybe. But it's also just a good book in general.

-I'll have to give it a read then.

                    -I'm going to test you on it if you do read it, just so you're aware.

-I'll be counting on it.

-Goodnight, Y/N.

                                                                                            -Goodnight, Aaron.

You sighed loudly, trying to ignore Esmé who was staring at you with wide eyes. You clutched your phone tighter in your hand and turned to look at her.

"I'm in such deep shit," you admitted as you leaned back on the couch, resting your head on the headrest.

——

authors note:

i hope you all enjoyed this chapter! i also hope the lecture part wasn't too boring. i figured it was a good change of pace.

thanks for reading! i appreciate the support <3

see you next chapter!

-jordyn

[kylosgenesis]

Teardrops on Fire

Synopsis:

Steve Rogers is the last Alpha of the an almost extinct Lycan pack. With only less than 100 members left. Steve must produce an heir to ensure the species survival and reduce the chance of attacks from others. Omegas are rare, and betas have a hard time producing children. Steves reality is finally setting in as his obligation of producing an heir faces a major set back.

Reader is the last suitable omega to mate with Steve, due to the fear of her daughters fate in the pack, her mother kept her hidden from the pack after her own exile. Only her mother, and Bucky's family know of her existence. Bucky is Steve's right hand man, and the packs best warrior! He and the reader developed a friendship and bond over the years, but age forced them to become distant.

What happens when she presents and her first heat cycle comes? Her body is in excruciating pain and a strong fever quickly overcomes her body. Facing the fear of her daughters possible death, her mom calls on the only person who can save her at this point, Alpha Steve! Bucky and the alphas friendship will be tested. The reader will be faced with her love for Bucky or her duty to the pack.

Chapter warnings : descriptions of death, abuse, blood, and mentions of miscarriage.

Chapter 2: Honey I tried

“When did it start?” Bucky was holding on to the edge of his kitchen table.He felt nauseated with the thought of her, sick and yearning, He couldn't even picture what she had grown up to look like, A part of him was scared of his own emotions.

“It hasn’t yet!”

“ At least not as of this morning.” her mother was breaking apart! Bucky could tell she was very scared and exhausted! He knew that her daughter's well being must've weighed heavily on her, he could see the physical manifestation of her pain. In just a few hours her nails had been bit to the core, and her tears streaks had left vivid and raw tracks around her cheeks.

“Buck! I know this is a lot to ask, but you have to tell Steve! Were worried she wouldn't make it otherwise. This will be her first heat”

He’d almost forgotten his mothers presence in the room, cause he turned around and met her eyes, tears streaming down her face. She'd grown fond of her friend's daughter over the years. After her own kids had left to form their own lives, she could still go to her and relive some memories of her little ones' younger days.

“I know! I'm still wrapping my head around it, but I know what I have to do” agitation surrounded his voice. He didn't know when his heart started to feel like it wanted to jump out of his chest or when he gripped the glass of water that was left on the table so hard it shattered, but it was evident that he wasn't going to be getting any rest that day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bucky parked his pickup in front of Steve's house. It was the largest house in the village, it wasn't Steve's choice, but he'd inherited it from his father, and his father had inherited it from his father before him. Being the house farthest away from the city limits, but right in the middle of the village meant Steve was protected, but could also be easily accessed.

Looking back at his passenger seat he saw Winnifred with her mom cradled upon her shoulder, comforting her best friend through the probably the second hardest day of her life.

“You should stay here Ma, I'll go get Steve” I know he’ll be happy to see you, but I still don't know how he'll react to her'' He opened his tool box on the bed of his truck and pulled out a large fleece blanket. Neatly folded he handed it over to his mother.

“Just keep her company till I come back”

The lights in Steve's house were on, but Buck could hear the sound of wood being shopped and Steve's grunts coming from the back of the property. As he reached his best friend's view, he took a deep breath. It was all gonna be different now, for all of them.

Steve had a large pair of headphones in, and was clearly a few songs deep into his playlist because when Bucky came around the corner; Steve almost lost a hold of the axe he was holding! Lookin at Buck he lowered his bulky headphones and stabbed the axe to the soft moody ground next to the small uncut piece of wood he was about to turn into lumber.

Steve's hair was not as long as Bucky's, and he had taken a liking to a neatly kept beard.

He grew it out as a joke at first! Clint dared him to grow it for a month, and after a month he'd grown fond of the style.So for the past year now, Steve looked less like a young soldier, and more like those lumberjacks from the cheesy romance novel covers his sister Rebecca loved to read.

“Hey Buck, didn't expect you around so late” Steve combed his hair back with his fingers. A nervous habit Bucky had noticed since childhood, especially when he had a lot on his mind.

“Couldn't sleep?”

Bucky was concerned for his friend, momentarily forgetting the reason for his sudden visit.

“ Banner called! Wanda was there earlier today, she wasn't feeling well. Turns out she was pregnant, and didn't know it!

“Steves that's awesome, when is she due ? we need to celebra…” as he looked into his best friend's eyes he saw the pain behind his look.

“She was miscarrying at the same time she found out she was pregnant, Buck. That's the third pup we've lost this year.I don't know how we're gonna get through this, It's getting harder and harder to keep everyone safe, and pretend we're not gonna be extinct in 50 years”

“Steve…” Steve's gaze was filled with a mixture of tears and rage. He took everyone's pain personally. And hearing about Wanda had awoken an unease within his soul. He couldn't fight the problem! How could a man used to protecting and fighting, deal with a problem that didn't require a fight?

“There’s an omega! She presented this morning!

“Who is she?”

“Remember Katerina? She … uhh … after she was exiled from the pack, she had a daughter!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 20 years ago

“We can't just let him die! We have to take him outside the walls! Someone out there can help him”

Joseph was the second in command to Benjamin Rogers. Two of the strongest alphas the entire western district had ever known. Both feared together, but explosive apart.

Benjamin had fathered a son 7 years earlier, a frail boy. He was often sickly and his future wasn’t promised! He wasn't meant to live much longer, the boy had once again woken up sick. A high fever overcoming his small body.

Benjamin had changed after his wife's death, he blamed the boy for Sarah’s death. A man that was once kind, and dedicated to his family, now lived like a wandering dark shadow inflicting cruelty against anyone that disagreed and crossed his path. His pack was strong! But there was no harmony, only fear.

Sarah had been a beautiful alpha as well as Benjamin. She had a hard time carrying Steve to term, at 7 months she fell bedridden and two weeks later, she had a seizure that compromised her pregnancy. Benjamin himself had to cut the boy out of his dying wife. That choice, as his wife laid there lifeless , covered in blood, and cut open like an animal awoke a demon in Benjamin. He saw death in his son's eyes, that is why he could never love him. He could never care!

Katerina took care of his young baby like her own, she had struggled to have a baby of her own so when Joseph came home holding a still bloody wailing baby, she fell madly in love with the small bundle in his arms.

The boy was small, but smart! He picked up words as young as a few months, and as a toddler he was incredibly gifted. Steve excelled in art, and even knees bit of music. Katerina loved to sit down and play piano! A young Steve would lean into her side and follow suit to her fingers on the side of the pano with his small hands. Joseph and Katerina watched him grow up, and took care of him.

Steve got sick often, but nothing too serious!

One day as she prepared breakfast she had a feeling of dread on the pit of her stomach, she ran upstairs to check on Steve and found him comatose on the bed!she wailed as she held her adopted infant son to her chest. Joseph came running to her after hearing her screams. He picked up the boy from her hands and loaded him into the car, with Katerina at his side he headed to Benjamin's house.

That was the first time Benjamin had seen his son since his wife died, his son himself nearly dead!

"Please Ben! He needs help! There's another pack two hours away, they have a doctor that can help him. She can heal him for good, please open up the walls so we can go to her! They both pleaded with Ben for hours, but to no avail!

The man was already covered in anger and reeking of alcohol, “Don't you dare challenge your alpha Joe! If I find out you defied me and left this territory you will never be allowed back”

Katerina couldn't let her boy die! With that warning in heart, she and her husband plotted to get little Stevie outside the pack territory, and to that doctor.

Behind Ben’s back, and knowing the consequences in his heart Joe called the Alpha from the neighboring pack, the other alpha had the resources ready for them to arrive in the morning. His doctor, a witch, was ready to give little Steve the life he deserved.

In the early morning of the night they sped their way through the woods. Once they reached the border a car awaited Rina, a beta from the fury pack was ready to take them to their pack.

Ben had closed the pack off to treaties when his wife died, he believed the world was dangerous and the pack was better off without interruptions, he couldn't even save his wife! His pack did not deserve to be mercied, they didn't deserve to live if she couldn't. So Ben slowly watched his pack become secluded and lost.

In the morning Ben, even drunker than the night before, had shown up at Joe's doorstep demanding to see the boy. Fully convinced he'd be dead by now, when Joe failed to produce an explanation as to why his wife was gone and so was Steve.

Ben lost it!

He called a pack meeting on which he publicly executed Joe, whether it was a display of power or just pure psychopathic joy. Joe’s death left the town broken, when Katerina came back with a healed Steve, she found herself widowed and exiled.

As a last sick jab into Joe’s heart even after his death, Ben took Steve!

As the years went by Steve forgot his early years, he forgot Joe and Katerina!

Steve remembered stories of his betrayal, her exile! How their actions forever changed a pack. He grew up kind, giving, and strong! Even if Steve didn't experience or know much love from his father, he was full of it!

And thanks to that witch both Katerina’s little growing heartbeat and Steve were stronger than ever!

Tags:

@austynparksandpizza @exposition-belongs-somewhere

[soupyspence]

Makeno/Akimax headcanons PT2

So I'm back with more headcanons, hope you all like it (plz don't be so hard on me, English is not my first language so if you see any mistakes please let me know😭🖐🏻)

This one is kinda long since I wrote some back story to support the headcanons, it's not accurate at all but let me dream🚶🏻‍♀️This time is from Max's point of view

Whenever people try to figure out who fell first, it comes as a surprise that Aki giggles and Max gets flustered all of the sudden. Max Wolfe, oh lord, he has been deeply in love with Akeno Menzies since they were little kids. Later did he understood that in fact, he liked Aki, no, that wasn't accurate at all, he loved Aki.

But as he grew older he realized Aki was just, so pure, he couldn't bear the thought of corrupting him with all his mess so when Audrey confessed him that she wanted to date Aki since he would look great by her side, Max just slip a dirty joke and let them be.

When he first slept with Audrey he was really hoping she felt guilty enough to confess what she did to Aki and then they would break up -he didn't even liked Audrey, he just wanted to fuck things up with her relationship- but when finally gave the situation some thought, he was already in bed with the pink haired boy and yes, Audrey. God, he wanted to end things quickly with her tonight so she would just get bored and go to read one of those annoying novels she was always talking about.

After the threesome, Max was so sure he didn't want to spend more time sharing Aki; he knew someone as kind and loving as Akeno wouldn't want to be tied with someone as Max. He ghosted Audrey when she texted him for another round of sex and he disappeared from Aki's sight soon after this. Max tried to go back to his old lifestyle- God knows he tried- but as soon someone tried to kiss him under the neon lights of some fancy club, he felt sick, Jesus, he felt as if he were cheating Aki. Max just went home that night.

He was sleeping (not really, he was thinking about a certain boy with dark lashes, ethereal brown eyes and bubblegum pink hair) when he heard someone knocking at his door, he wasn't in the mood for late night sex or drugs

-jesus, it's 4am, who the fuck knocks at 4am?- he groaned as he opened the door but he stopped middle sentence when he see Akeno right in front of him, this was the last straw, he didn't care about Audrey, he didn't care about their lovely relationship and he certainly did not give a fuck about what people might say when they find out Max has been in love with Aki all this time.

But Aki is the first one to confess his feelings without hesitation, that night he let Aki into his house and stay over (he could say something cheesy like he also let Aki get into his heart but he has been there for years, growing into all the lovely shades of pink Max could ever imagine)

A couple of weeks later they reveal to the group they are in fact, dating. It is not a revelation at all, Max has been asking Luna and Monet for the perfect way of saying "I love you" to a certain someone who loves romantic movies, is a huge fan of skateboarding and has a weird fascination with airports. It doesn't take a genius to know Aki fit the description perfectly, so when Monet casually says to Aki that his boyfriend is being a pain in the ass, he just blushes and tries to ask how she knows but he just tells her "He told me he is doing some investigation about something, usual Max stuff" he says softly as he smiles.

Two days later, Max takes Aki to the airport and tries to say the three words, eight letters thing but he is stumbling with his own words -Aki deserves the world, he deserves an award winning love confession-

Aki just looks at him confused and tries to hold his hand but Max just runs to the end of the corridor leaving Aki standing alone in the middle of the hallway, the passengers were looking at him pitifully imagining he got dumped, but then a song started playing from the speakers and Max appeared from the end of the corridor singing cheerfully.

"You're just too good to be true, can't take my eyes off of you" he sang loudly as he pointed his finger to Aki "You'd be like heaven to touch, I wanna hold you so much"

People in the background were recording the whole thing, being amazed by Max Wolfe singing in the middle of an airport. Aki knew this would be in every single newspaper, his dad will be asking him questions and subtly judging him,but for once Aki felt like he could breathe freely; he had nothing to be ashamed of.

As Max was singing, he came closer to Aki until they could hear each other heartbeat; people noticed it was a private moment between the two boys and let them standing alone in the middle of the hallway.

"I love you, baby" Max muttered while he caressed Aki's cheek "And if it's quite alright I need you, baby"

Aki smiled and Max stopped singing, looking at him full of love "I have never thought I was a romantic nor did I thought I would be singing in the middle of the airport" he said "But your shades of pink have coloured my heart and your name has filled my senses Akeno"

He held Aki's face with both of his hands "I'm deeply in love with Akeno Menzies"

[weekend-conspiracy-theorist]

Watched the new Bond movie! I enjoyed it. The rest of this will be spoilers and also I'm posting from mobile so I can't read more, so just... scroll fast if you don't want to see anything

***

I liked Madeline (Madelyn?) a lot more in this movie than Spectre; she felt like more of an actual character than "here's who we think the perfect woman for Bond would be", which is funny since I think she may have actually had less total screentime? and the flashback scene that opened the movie had already been described in Spectre, but it felt much more relevant and impactful on her actions (and not just because it was, y'know, a significant plot development) in the present day scenes, and her motivations were altogether much more tangible throughout this one... I mean, obviously not to degrade a trauma narrative when it's successful, but Spectre simply was a bad movie where all of the characters were very flat, and she suffered most for it being her first introduction.

I thought No Time to Die was also, overall, a very fitting send off for Craig's Bond. Lashanna Lynch's 007 was compelling and fun-- she truly earned the moniker, and while obvs she didn't NEED Bond's approval, it was nice to see her get it; it WAS nonetheless fitting that she handed it back for the last mission, although I was annoyed they never established what 00 designation Bond was using beforehand (or that, presumably, she was using afterwards). With Madeline being more compelling in this one, the romance between her and Bond was as well, so I liked that Bond got that... closure, I suppose, even if it was so very bittersweet when things fell apart the way they did.

(Although I didn't buy the idea that Heracles was truly permanent and a solution to destroying the nanobots couldn't be found. I mean... c'mon. Why didn't his EMP work, for one thing? but whatever. I did see his death coming a mile away and also kind of appreciated it, so I won't quibble too hard. If for nothing else, Craig finally got to say a true goodbye to a character he hated playing 😂)

I liked that Bond's friendships were upheld-- Felix Leiter being the one man Bond evidently told how to find him (as it seemed at least to me that Naomi had followed Felix and thereby found Bond, not that MI6 knew where he was), Moneypenny and Q continuing to side with him over M, and even the first moment with him and Tanner was kind of cute.

(Tangential sidenote: Thanks for confirming Q is gay (or at least dating a dude, he could be bi); it would have been nice for it to be more than a passing line, but tbf it got about the same level of attention as Moneypenny's bf in Spectre. There's just not much room for secondary character's outside lives in these. And Q's an established and beloved character already, which makes it easier to swallow. I know it's going to be #controversial that they so thoroughly skewered 00Q despite both of them being canonically not-straight (well... a controversial take on my own part this time, but I think it's arguable whether or not Bond was bluffing to Silva in that scene in Skyfall, so arguably canon, anyway), and believe me, I have read a ton of 00Q fic and even written some that never quite saw the light of day. But I'm also begging anybody whose first instinct is ANGER to take a deep breath and look at the character arcs and admit that across all 5 Craig movies Bond's was pretty good.)

I am pissed about what happened to Felix, though; he's a great character in the novels and this version of him from Craig's movies has been superb. I would have liked to have seen him potentially stick around as Felix for whoever does the next Bond. Ana de Armas's CIA agent's name escapes me, but she was fun. Maybe she, at least, will stick around to be a CIA contact down the line-- assuming they keep any characters consistent, which I suppose is questionable. It's how they did it with previous M and Q's, maintaining those actors/actresses when possible despite reboots of Bond, but who the hell knows, I guess.

With both Armas's character and Lynch's Naomi (or was it Nomi? I'm so bad with character names), Craig's Bond did his grinny little "so delighted these new people are competent and interesting" thing that he did with Moneypenny and Q in Skyfall (and sort of Madeline in Spectre? but he was just so horny in that scene, idk), and I love that. Which also, notably, he didn't do with Ash (?); shoulda known the guy would turn out to be evil rather than incompetent.

I think Mallory's M was the most undercut by this movie; their mid-movie explanation of his motives re: Heracles made it... better, and I did like the callback to his words to C from Spectre, but it still didn't fully compute since like... if you can't even name your villains, how are you supposed to come up with their DNA? Bad plan, and quite obviously way too easily turned against... everyone. I also didn't care for how insistent they seemed to be through both Spectre and No Time to Die that Bond and M should just never get along, when Skyfall really did set things up for a whole new cooperative set of secondary characters.

Altogether, though, I thought it was a good movie, enjoyable to watch, and capped off the throughline of Craig's movies quite nicely. I was quite content with it.

[vaatistrife-purplemage]

Wrote this today.

Fictober 2021 day #2 Prompt number: 4. ''Fine, I give up''. Fandom: ''reckless'' / MirrorWorld novel series (2010 - ongoing) by Cornelia Funke. Fanfiction.

Warnings: Mentions of violence, mentions of bullying, may contain eventual spoilers. _________________________

''Fine, I give up''. No words hurt more than those as they fell from the lips of the eldest brother.

Especially when considering he had always been there for his younger brother Will. Well, almost always...

He had been there for him at the playground whenever four graders would pick on him. Making them run as fast as they could when he'd appear on the playground, shielding Will and punching them in their faces, kicking their knees and punching them in their stomachs until they'd hand Will's stuff back. He had even gotten into a fight with a girl once but that had little to nothing to do with Will getting bullied.

He had been there for him each time he was unable to find sleep when they had been younger; either terrified by thunderstorms, the dark, monsters in his closet, mr. Tomkins; which jacob had told him to be a human-eating Ogre living in the elevator, causing him to be extremely scared to go to preschool. Will would often seek comfort near his eldest brother. He'd have slowly opened the door, standing on his naked feet in the dark, hugging his stuffed animal close before he'd slowly make his way over to his bed and crawl underneath the covers. This would wake Jacob. He'd be annoyed at first but soon go back to sleep, wrapping his arms around Will and hold him close.

He'd have his back. He'd be rescueing him from his nightmares. He'd keep him warm and safe. Always.

Except for the day they had to fend for themselves all of a sudden and had no one but each other left anymore. When Will needed him the most, he was nowhere to be seen. Will was left on his own, experiencing sleepless nights and pain. Not just from the fact they only had one another to look after now. Pain from standing in his brother's shadow. Envy, so much envy.

Will was his brother and he loved him. That was the truth. Their sibling bond was unlike any other but ever since he had discovered the mirror it had begun to gradually show subtle cracks.

These days each brother had taken different paths and travelled different roads. They were living different lives and even so Jacob couldn't help to stop carrying him. To be his brother's keeper. Up until now. Celeste wanted him to forget his brother, but at the same time also wished he could see him again, knowing how much Will meant to him. Or had meant to him.

To seemingly grow further and further apart after so many years of protecting his little brother, being there for him through thick and thin for the most part, hurt. Yet neither of them could really dwell in the past. Jacob was who he was. Will had accepted who and what he was now.

It was best to keep it that way even though the eldest didn't want to have things remain like they were between them now. He wanted to mend their bond, but to mend it seemed too late. Far too late.

And so Jacob let Will be, going each their own way. Living their own lives. Even though he found it hard to stop being his brother's keeper.

[hdawg1995]

*crashes though the time line* SCREW IT! I CAN'T DRAW RIGHT NOW! HAVE A FANFIC/NOVELIZATION OF THE COMIC I WANTED TO DRAW LAST NIGHT! *flees*

The rain started to lighten up, but the chill in the air still caused his breath to come out in puffs of fog. The shambling beings watch him, waiting for him to make a move. the fighter kneeled in the mud, his arms trembling as he uses his sword as a support. As far as the undead know he could be one light breeze away from death, so they wait. Their master watches from 1000s of feet away, cloaked soaked though and shivering just as the fighter is.

this fight did not go as planned. Him and his party had been hunting the necromancer for weeks- the filth tricking them and directing them at the innocent. He remembers William's cry of aghast at the realization that the necromancers he had slain -who begged for mercy and tried to defend themselves- were innocent of the crimes their target had committed.

"Agathaw..." William was trembling as he stared at his hands. "My god's will was to kill them... my god did not stop me... my god willed i kill them..."

The fighter didn't know how to comfort the paladin. It was true- their god had stopped them from killing before, so why did they let him kill those necromancers? because they were necromancers? because they had undead servants? William hadn't left his room in days after that...

Not until their scout found them and revealed the location of the actual necromancer they were hunting. The man who had raided hundreds of grave yards for servants and recruited vampires and ghouls to increase his army. the man who loomed over the three of them as he commanded mindless zombies to attack them.

It was going fine until the corpse of the young woman Willian had slain in the name of his god shambled forward.

That filth directed the soulless bodies of every enemy and every innocent the party had killed, and got some sick joy out of seeing their paladin crumble under the weight of the deeds he had committed because the necromancer directed them in such a way.

Feyreen couldn't save him, but she used a spell to prevent him from rising from the grave. The scout was told to flee but of course she wouldn't. They had gotten more than half way though the army before an arrow struck her in her neck. Agathaw watched in awe and horror as the elf used the last of her strength to fell the only long range enemy their target had.

The fight continue and Agathaw fought hard- but now, he was alone. There was one maybe 1000 or 1200 feet of undead left and he just needed to carve a path. he just needed to get to the necromancer. He just needed to get to that filthy liar, that criminal, that...

His anger warms him as he remembers it all- the misleading clues, the guilt, the shame. He glances at his sword and sighs.

"Excalibur..." he whispers to the blade. "I don't know if you're listening- if you've ever listened to me- but if this is my last stand..."

Agathaw's words get caught in his throat. He stands on trembling legs, the undead perking up at his movements.

"If this is my last stand I want you to know: you didn't deserve this."

The sword feels warm. a glance in his direction. So he is listening.

He readies the sword as he continues. "My grandfather trapped you in this sword- a demon who trust a human and wanted to protect him. He betrayed you. I know William would say you deserved it for being a demon..." He blinks away the tears as he so easily fell into referring to the paladin in past tense.

"But you have been loyal to me. You didn't curse me like so many people warned you would, you didn't fight against my will like you had done to all my cousins. You've been a loyal friend and although you've never spoken to me in the past three months-" his side pinches and he flinches as he takes a battle stance. "-I am glad you have been with me. I am glad you will see me to my dying day."

Agathaw roared as he rushed forward into the zombies. He knows it takes three or four stabs and slashes from Excalibur to fell one, so he knows he will get overwhelmed very quickly. He is going to die fighting because thats how Feyreena and William went. He wouldn't want to meet them in the beyond and have them look down on him. He has to fight, he has to try, he-

He slashes though a single zombie with one attack. It falls and crumbles into dust.

In the back of his mind he hears a voice urge him on. it tells him "go" and he does.

One after the other they fall and the voice gets loader and he surges forward with each slash. They're all falling, crumbling, and the momentum of each swing guides him to the next and the next and the next.

His breathing gets harder and he can't feel his legs but he continues to slay and cleave though the army. He isn't in one spot for long, each second that goes by is another undead that rests at his feet. Agathaw pants as he stands and looks up at his true target- the necromancer who stares at him in horror. It shouldn't be satisfyingly, and maybe it is because he knows killing the bastard will at least set his mind at ease, but he smiles and bears his teeth.

He doesn't say a word as the voice growls "Keep moving".

And he does. Again and again the zombies fall and his heart hurts in his chest as he cleaves though more and more. He hesitates as a man that could not be more than sixteen summers shambles towards him. Agathaw falters and feels the sword grow heavy. Gravity brings the sword down, the zombie's head rolling to the side. He doesn't know what happens next as his body continues the momentum of his cleaves. He grows angry- angry that a child was used against him, angry that the child had to die twice. He doesn't notice his sword growing warm, he doesn't notice his legs are numb, he doesn't notice the vampires are fleeing, and he doesn't notice he has finally reached the necromancer.

He is covered in the putrid blood of the undead as he looms over the necromancer. The man growls and points at him, but nothing happens. He waves his hand and nothing happens. He raises his hand slowly and the bones rattle around him but they splinter into dust.

Agathaw feels tears running down his cheeks, mixing with the dirt and blood of the battle. William was gone. Feyreena was gone. All those innocent necromancers who could have been examples of necromancy, who could have represented the good it could do, were gone.

His sword is warm and the tears fall faster, mingling with the rain.

"Do you believe in redemption?" Agathaw asks the man.

the necromancer looks at him in awe. "Do you?"

"No." he raised the sword. "Not really."

The necromancer's head falls into the mud. The body falls and lands with a squishy, sloppy thud. The rain stops, but the sound of something small falling hundreds of times still surrounds him. Looking out, the remaining undead crumble to dust. He feels warmth as clouds part. The sun is still high in the sky and although the light doesn't penetrate the clouds completely its enough to stop his shivering.

A lone fighter with a demon possessed sword stands in the light and does not know what to do with himself.

The sword suggests a long nap at the inn. He agrees.

[rumor-imbris]

To keep your mind busy while you're in a train.

Besides Connor (your sweetheart) do you like another assassin?

Any future fic of Mary and Connor?

Which part you find it difficult: the writing of the novel or the research on how it was the New World in the 18th Century?

~From the fatina 😊 ✨

Giulietta, my sweet fairy! Here I am, I'm sooo late, sorry! Connection was really bad on board the train because of the many tunnels, then I was tired to death and fell asleep! UoU zzZ So, thank you so much for your ask. Wow, how many questions! Let's start...

1. Ezio was the one who started it all for me, he was my mentor ^-^ righ before I found my soulmate in the Mowhak Valley (▰˘◡˘▰) So, yes, I can say a very affectioned one is Ezio; like for anyone else, I guess, he enters your heart, makes you a novice and never leaves you. I also had a big crush on him in the beginning, (again like everybody!) but you know I'm very jelous by nature, so it couldn't work between us xD!!! And then you came and he fell for you! Oh, and his sister Claudia! i think she's amazing and I'm one of those poeple who think she deserved a spin-off game! Claudia inspired me a lot to create Mary's path in my AC3 FF novel!

Adewhale is also an assassin I really loved, very well written, tenacious and amazing, very underrated. I really liked that in "Freedom Cry" you're not motivated by money or resources, but in terms of freed slaves; it represents very well Ade's purpose, I think.

And then, of course Grandpa Edward! I'm not a big fan of AC IV Black Flag, but grandpa is grandpa! In my headcanon AU Grandpy Eddy is still alive and so proud of his grandson captain of the Aquila ★~(◡‿◡✿) 2. Mmhh... I have something on my mind. The main story is concluded, but I was thinking of writing some separate episodes, little adventures, maybe one where they sail to England, a new OC and fragments of their life before and after the journey North. We'll see. Some things are well shaped already on my mind, other less, but as always, I think I'll start writing only when I think it's the right moment ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ

3. This is a good and interesting question. As I wrote here many times, writing the whole novel was a super hard thing on its own, it took a lot of motivation. I had to force myself thinking that this was something I wanted to do for myself, no matter the purpose or gaining nothing useful out of all of the work it could have taken, it was all about me and my passion. Also it took almost three years and during that time many things evolved and changed, in between which I had one of the worst moments of my life and the writing process was completely ceased, until things started to align in a more positive way and I felt like going on writing again and concluding the story. It happens, I guess. The most difficult part, however, for me was the naval language. Historical research for a period writing is never easy, I've been there before, for other stuff I wrote in the past, and this time most of that part was in the main game already. The naval technical language though is... tough! Also I had to search terms both in Italian and then in English, as they are very different! It was hard, but I learnt a lot. The world of the ships, vessels, frigates, brigantines and so on is extremely fascinating, but it's a real maze! You could easily end up losing yourself and making mistakes, especially when it comes to describe battles in open sea and list the cannon types, the shots, the directions and all the sailors' terms the case requires! Furthermore, about Mary, I always tried to keep in mind that she is a young lady in the 18th century. A very difficult time for women, mainly ruled by men, when people thought that a girl's only purpose in life (even a wealthy one) was to get married well and give birth. I don't want to spoil too much, but I mentioned an important figure of Feminism and progressive thinking back then, I hope you might want to read until the end to find out who she is!

Sorry for the very long answers, I hope everything is clear and exhaustive! Thanks again for the ask, come visit me again whenever your curiosity wishes to!

[xtruss]

A Muslim Writer on Finding Her Voice in Post-9/11, Post-Trump America

— By Aisha Sultan | 09/01/21 | Newsweek.

A new generation of Muslim Americans is making its mark. Spencer Platt/Getty

Like most Americans old enough to remember, I know exactly where I was and what I was doing on September 11, 2001 when the first hijacked plane hit the World Trade Center in New York City. I was showering when I heard my husband yelling for me. Dripping wet and wrapped in a towel, I watched in shock, along with tens of millions of others, as the Twin Towers fell, killing thousands of people inside.

Emotions from that day feel so much closer than two decades ago.

My stomach turned in revulsion. My body tightened with fear for my relatives who worked there. Dread settled like a heavy rock on my chest. Like other Americans, I wondered, who was attacking us. But as a Muslim, I had other questions too: Did the attackers claim to be Muslims? And, if so, what would happen to the rest of us?

I quickly got dressed and headed to the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, where I worked as an education reporter. I talked to stunned school officials and students while still trying to process what was happening.

That evening, I checked in with my family in Texas. My brother, then in middle school, had been in class when his teacher broke the news. He became nervous and, in the teacher's eyes at least, asked too many questions. "Is this World War III? Did they bomb downtown? Are they going to bomb our town next?" The teacher told him to shut up and leave her classroom, that she couldn't bear to look at his face.

Riz Ahmed attends the "Mogul Mowgli" press conference during the 70th Berlinale International Film Festival Berlin at Grand Hyatt Hotel on February 21, 2020 in Berlin, Germany. Ahmed recently criticized “dehumanizing and demonizing portrayals of Muslims" in films. Andreas Rentz/Getty Images

My mother's co-workers at the department store where she had worked for years suddenly refused to speak to her. Cops escorted my hijab-wearing cousin off her college campus because it was no longer deemed safe for her to be there.

In the immediate aftermath of that day's horror, my grief and anger as an American was so compounded with my fear and anxiety as a Muslim that it compelled me to do something unthinkable for me: I poured my heart out to the readers of the Sunday paper.

Back then, it was unusual for a news reporter to pen a personal response to a national tragedy. This was long before social media made us all performative, confessional animals. I needed my neighbors in the Midwest to know that while Muslim Americans shared their grief and anger, we also feared whether our country would turn on us.

I ended that column with the questions my college-aged sister had asked me: "Will the government come after us like they did with the Japanese? Will other Americans stand up for us?"

I told my readers the same thing I told her: I don't know.

I wasn't sure what to expect but dozens and dozens of readers responded to her question with expressions of support: Yes, we will stand up for you, you and your family are one of us, they said, in one way or another, in message after message. There were just two negative, Islamophobic emails in the bunch.

Such an overwhelmingly positive response seems inconceivable now, given how polarized our discourse is now and how normalized hate speech has become—an irony, when you consider how heightened anti-Muslim sentiment was at the time.

Key moments after 9/11 also feel unimaginable now. Back then, a Republican president, George W. Bush, visited the Islamic Center in Washington D.C. days after the attack to tell the American people that the attacks violated the tenets of Islam—"Islam is peace," he famously said—and to defend Muslims as equal citizens worthy of respect and protection. Our last Republican president, by contrast, touted a "Muslim ban" across the country. Even my state, Missouri, now bright partisan red, was a swing state back in 2001, where Democrats sometimes voted for Republicans and vice versa.

Coming together after tragedy: U.S. Muslims sing "God Bless America" at an interfaith memorial service in Pasadena, California for 9/11 victims two days after the attacks. Lucy Nicholson/AFP/Getty

It was against this backdrop that I felt moved to share my vulnerability with readers who may never have met a Muslim before.

Their responses reassured and comforted me, but the expressions of support didn't always—or even mostly—translate into action on a national scale. Instead, the Muslim community bore the brunt of the fallout of 9/11 for years. The government targeted Muslim communities with surveillance, questioning and confinement. It seemed law enforcement and the media used the label of "terrorism" for heinous crimes only if the perpetrator was Muslim. The number of anti-Muslim hate crime incidents reported to the FBI rose from 28 in 2000 to 481 in 2001— and those are just the official numbers. Countless incidents are never reported to the FBI.

Yet, in those ensuing years, creative work by Muslims also bubbled up in the country. A trio of Muslim comedians—Preacher Moss, Azhar Usman and Azeem Muhammad—launched the "Allah Made Me Funny" comedy tour in 2003. Writer Laila Lalami's debut novel, Hope and Other Dangerous Pursuits, was published in 2005. Actor Aasif Mandvi began appearing on The Daily Show in 2006. G.Willow Wilson published her first graphic novel, Cairo, in 2007.

People who had lived as Muslims in America prior to 9/11 became American Muslims, more engaged in its civic, cultural and political institutions. Muslims creatives were reclaiming the narrative and telling our own stories instead of responding to the false dichotomy of victim or villain told about us.

I was among them. Seven years after the attacks, I began lobbying my editors for a features column, a departure from a decade of straight news reporting. I had become a mother with two small children. I was trying to make sense of the confusion and isolation that parenting provokes. My first column in 2008 described a bleak winter day when I was sleep-deprived and frustrated and feeling slightly suffocated by the tight bonds of motherhood.

The author: St. Louis Post-Dispatch syndicated columnist Aisha Sultan. Elizabeth Wisemen

Again, readers in the heartland responded with overwhelming support and commiseration. I wasn't making any overtly political arguments. As readers got to know me, they appreciated the commonalities in our parenting experiences despite our differences. I wasn't trying to be an ambassador or spokeswoman for my faith or an ethnic community. I was sharing my observations and struggles as a suburban, middle class American mom who happened to be Muslim and of Pakistani descent.

An older, childless white man who lives in a conservative exurban county wrote to say I was the only Muslim he knew besides the attackers on 9/11. He said he had changed his perspective on Muslims in America after reading my column for years. We weren't just a faceless enemy to him anymore. He saw me as a person, my humanity very real to him.

We've stayed in touch for more than a decade.

Over time more Americans have become like that reader, increasingly comfortable with the idea and presence of Muslims—as neighbors and even family members. Yet simultaneously, the conservative right turned Islam into an effective political weapon and used it to bludgeon Muslims who have sought greater representation and political power.

These opposing forces once again became evident in the correspondence I got from readers, The tone and tenor changed notably in the summer of 2016 as the political rhetoric of the presidential campaign came to a boiling point. Public writers have always had our share of angry critics. But the criticism I received turned increasingly vitriolic, with a deep undercurrent of anger. People who disagreed with what I'd written weren't merely looking to dissent but to silence me.

Increasingly, pushback was laced with profanity, racial slurs and calls to go back to where I came from. Anonymous writers called me a 'raghead c*nt' and others told me to "get out of America, you towel head bigot b*tch." One reader mailed a handwritten letter after I wrote about talking to my children about the killing of Travyon Martin, the Black teenager fatally shot by a white member of a neighborhood watch patrol in Florida. She said she would make a point of cutting out my column photo from the paper every weekend so she could put it in the toilet and piss on it.

After the 2016 election, the heightened anxiety about personal safety I'd felt right after 9/11 returned, even stronger and lasted for years. It's not hard to understand why. During the period between 2015 and 2016, the number of assaults against Muslims rose significantly, surpassing the aftermath of 9/11, according to a Pew Research Center analysis of hate crimes statistics from the FBI. Over the following years, disinformation and conspiracies began taking hold in America at a level I'd never seen before. White rage was palpable online and eventually, on the streets.

The memories and feelings associated with the events of 9/11 continue to play a role in attitudes toward the American Muslim community in some quarters. Here, the annual 'Tribute in Light' memorial in lower Manhattan near One World Trade Center. Spencer Platt/Getty

And yet during this period, Muslims in America continued to create art and cultural capital at an unprecedented level. Playwright Ayad Akhtar produced his Pultizer-winning play Disgraced. Hasan Minhaj reclaimed the title Patriot Act, launching a show that became a cultural touchpoint for a generation of American Muslims too young to know firsthand how that legislation was wielded against the Muslim community. Ramy Youssef won a Golden Globe, Mahershala Ali won two Oscars and Lena Khan is directing Hollywood films. Models, pundits and Olympic athletes came into the spotlight while wearing a hijab.

At some point, I too decided that whatever the costs of speaking out, far greater was the cost of silence. If someone was going to attack me for speaking out against white supremacists, that was a risk I was willing to take. I couldn't back down from writing about controversial issues that I knew would provoke an angry backlash, even when it felt reader abuse could possibly escalate to violence.

What I've observed and experienced over the past 20 years, as a columnist and as a Muslim, perhaps boils down to this: As the politics of exclusion grow more strident, parts of the culture embrace inclusivity. Each force is a reaction to the other.

Certainly this has happened in my own relationship with readers. Even as the negative emails ramped up in intensity and bile, I still have far more readers who send words of kindness and encouragement than hatred. Many reveal their own secrets and most vulnerable stories.

My goal when I began writing a column was to give a voice to parents struggling to raise kids in this digital, social media saturated age. I hope I've done that but along the way something else important happened: I found my own voice too.

My youngest sister, who was in college when I wrote my first personal story in the aftermath of 9/11, decided to attend law school after she graduated. She eventually ran for state judge in the 113th District in Houston and was elected in 2018 as part of the record-setting number of Muslims who won public office that year.

With the benefit of two decades of hindsight and the insights I've gained from my interaction with readers over the years, I realize I could have given her a better answer when she turned to me as a frightened college student in 2001. I could have reassured her: Yes, there will be other Americans who will stand up for us.

More importantly, we will learn to stand up for ourselves.

— Aisha Sultan is a syndicated columnist based at the St. Louis Post-Dispatch.

[therosemoonlight]

THE ROSE IS RED🌹

WARNING 18+

.

It’s been a year since She married him. been like a roller coaster for them. The way they change into better person also as wife and husband for each other.. She doesn’t know what she feels right now. She felt bored and jealous. She just got home after visiting her husband’s office to bring lunch but ended up nothing else happened, now she’s sitting and watching herself in the mirror. She smirked and sad again. She’s bad at controlling herself but she’s learning.

“Why? She’s not that beautiful. You're the one most beautiful!!! Why you’re so jealous, Ko Mun Yeong.” She told herself.

Her phone is ringing. She bit her lips and rejected the call. She put the phone down again. She walked and sat in bed, thinking that she shouldn’t do that. It's so childish tho. She promised him to change her bad habit.

Meanwhile in the big room, a handsome charming man in a suit and smiling at his phone. He’s staring at his lock screen, their selfie together. She kissed his cheek and he’s smiling at the camera, that time when they were in Paris. What a beautiful country Paris is! Those memories when he proposed to her.

Moon Gang Tae is the CEO in his mom’s company. He has been making his family’s company more successful. People call him ``The most handsome young businessman” in South Korea and he has a beautiful love story with his childhood best friend, his Ko Mun Yeong. The most successful novel writer in the country even the world knows her talent & beauty.

"She rejected my call? how dare she, but... that’s hot, wife.” He chuckled, loosening his tie. It's kinda hot there or just him.

A woman with short hair opened the door and walked, having a sit crossed the desk.

“Boss, I’m so sorry for what happened. I didn’t mean like that. It was..” said that woman.

“it’s okay, Ju-ri. It was an accident and I would explain to her later. Now you can go back to work.” he said.

She nodded and walked out of the room. Ju-ri is his new secretary. Ko Mun Yeong knew that He looked for new secretary but she didn’t expect that Ju-ri is that pretty, in fact she’s the prettiest in her Gangtae’s eyes. She never thought that she would be so jealous.

9PM, Gangtae just got home. He came home late because he had a meeting with his colleague and they asked him for dinner. He couldn’t say no.

He walked into their home, even it's not just HOME it’s like a castle. He made it for Ko Mun Yeong, She once told him when they were kids.

“I want a castle when I get married to someone in the future. I want my prince....to” she said and He cut her words.

“I will buy one for you.” little Gangtae said and stared at her. They’re sitting under the tree enjoying the views of the flowers and watching the butterflies in the middle of the woods.

“Gangtae, who says I want to marry you when I grow up?!” She said.

He laughed.

“Why? You don’t want me to marry you and be your prince? I don’t want to see some random guy protect you, I’m the only one who can protect you. Hmmm so, don’t you dare to marry someone else. ” he said.

“You always do this to me and do anything you want.” she pouted her lips.

He pinched her cheeks. They both are staring at each other.

“You’re so cute when you’re angry, don’t you know that, flowie?” Gangtae said.

She smiled at him, she has the most beautiful smile. She touched his bangs.

“You call me flowie, why?” she asked.

“Because you love flowers that much and you’re just like those flowers. So beautiful.” he pointed at the flowers. Both of them smiled.

Gang tae smiled when he remembered their childhood’s memories. He walked in to the living room and saw so many papers on the desk. Mun Yeong was about to make new novel. A maid greets him.

“Where’s MunYeong?” he asked with his tired face but still cool. lol

The maid kept looking down, never had guts to look him in his eyes.

“Mistress is in her room, sir. She did’t eat her dinner yet. I called her out and telling her dinner was ready. But she told me, she didn’t want to.” the maid explained.

Gangtae nodded. The maid left. They have maids at their castle, but after GangTae reached home from work, they have to go from the castle. He also made home for them to leave around the castle so if Munyeong needs them, they will be there fast except for the night after he is at the castle.

He walked toward their room, holding the doorknob and opened the door. His eyes were scanning for his wife, he’s wondering where she was. He put his briefcase on the couch. When He took off his tie and about to took off his blazer.

The beautiful hands he knew very well helping his to undress his blazer. Her hands on his shoulder was helping him but it was more like stroking his chest which was still covered by his white shirt from the back. She didn’t say anything yet.

Gangtae smelled the sweet scent, and turned around. For the umpteenth time, He was fascinated by Ko Mun Yeong. He seemed unable to breathe at this time. MunYeong was still using her towel on her body with her long-wet hair. Her bare face without any makeup was just too pure and gorgeous. Her flawless pink lips. They were staring at each other. Gangtae was deeply lost in his own thoughts at the moment. He tried to swim upwards but He can't. The aura she drew was intense, slowly the water fell on her hair which was still wet after bathing.

He stepped forward while still staring at her lips. He was very hard to swallow now. He put his left hand to her hip. He was keep adoring his wife, stroking her bare face with his finger.

Munyeong didn’t do anything but keep staring at his beautiful eyes, her fave.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that. It was an accident. She fell and I was helping....” he tried to explain what he thought making her angry at him.

Munyeong stroked his shoulder to his neck, playing her thumb on it meanwhile resting her left hand on his chest.

“Stop talking about anyone when you are with me, Moon Gang Tae.” She said and staring at his perfect lips, back to his eyes.

“then, what should we talk about? Hmm?” He whispered.

She accidentally bit her lip, which was his weakness.

Gangtae had smashed his lips againts hers. His hands ran along her waist. Her mouth opened as she slightly moaned, feeling Gangtae’s hands roaming on her and He took the advantage to insert his tongue inside Munyeong’s mouth to taste her. She tasted like heaven, so sweet! Their tongues met, Munyeong tilted her head so that the kiss could be deeper as he did the same. Gangtae sucked her tongue.

“Ahhh...” MunYeong moaned.

his right hand on her head, touched her long-wet hair. They both were so lost in their makeout, Gangtae pulled her closer. Her breast pressed his chest. He could feel it, she didn’t wear anything behind the towel. He removed his lips from hers, went to her collarbone. He kissed it, smell her sweet scent. He licked it. He placed his lips on her neck, kissed it softly, He inhaled the intoxicating smell of roses coming from the wet, long tresses of Munyeong’s open hair which was making her look even more desirable. He couldn’t help but smile. slowly pulled himself to watch her face. She was so fucking hot.

MunYeong pulled him again closer and began kissing him again roughly. They could hear the sound of their deep kisses echoing throughout the room. Gangtae slowly led her towards the bed. Munyeong slowly pushed him onto the bed. She made Gangtae sit on the side of the bed. She broke the kiss and sat straddled on his lap. Her inner thighs that were visible to his eyes were so beautiful. Gangtaeput his hands on her hips while Munyeong's hands on his shoulders and stroked his back hair. Her legs wrapped around his waist and her ass pressing against his manhood through his pants. She could feel his big thick manhood. The way she really wants to his manhood inside her. Slowly Gangtae held her towel and pulled it. Her towel fell down on her lap. She kept staring at him. GangTae was beyond turned on at this point. Her boobs were the most beautiful. They were generously proportioned, perfectly round, perky and so delicious.

“What are you looking at, darling?” She whispered. She strokes his lips, admiring those lips.

He was back to looking at her eyes. His eyes clouded with lust he could hardly endure.

“are you asking me?” He tilted his head slightly and looked straight into her eyes deeply.

“You heard me, didn’t you Moon Gang Tae?” She said in her sexy voice.

His hands slowly rose towards her boobs. He stroked the sides of her right boob without touching the whole. MunYeong moved slightly in response to the touch on her boob. She couldn't explain how hard her nipples were. Gangtae's touch on her body had an enormous effect. As always.

He stroked her areola without touching the nipple. He admired it so much.

“My favorite, They're so beautiful.” He said.

She grabbed his hand and placed it on her boob.

“suck them.” She commanded.

“as your command, maam.”

He smashed his lips on her hard nipple meanwhile pulling her closer to him. He ran his other hand to squeeze her another boob. Munyeong tilted her head up as she bit her lips holding her moan. GangTae licked her areola and back to sucking her boob. He sucked it as if there’s milk inside it. He moved to the other one and did the same. He slid his hands down her back and stopped at her ass. He gave it a rough squeeze and continued to rub and squeeze it which only turned Munyeong on more and encouraged her to be even more bold. She moved her hips back and forth.

“ahhh..” They both moaned together.

looked back at each other and fell silent. They couldn't hold their breath. Munyeong unbuttoned his shirt one by one and threw them on the floor. She touched his abs, stroking those. She always drowned at the sight of his bare chest, his muscles. So strong.

Gangtae held her cheeks, her beautiful face. He felt like an angel was sitting on his lap, and naked. He caressed her soft lips, they’re looking at each other.

“you’re so beautiful, Ko Mun Yeong.”

“You talk too much, darl. And I’m hungry now” she said while put her hands on his shoulders.

He was just remembered that she didn’t have dinner yet. How did he could forget that. Munyeong made her forget anything.

“ah, you didn’t have your dinner, right? I’m sorry that... I forgot to tell you that-” he was explaining but she cut his words.

“YOU. I’m hungry for you, Moon Gang Tae. How dare you stop this.” she said.

He couldn’t say anything at the moment, he wanted her so bad to be honest but He didn’t want munyeong gets sick, they both always have their dinner together. She wouldn’t have dinner if he doesn’t reach home yet.

“but you have to-”

“stupid.” she again cut his words.

She roughly kissed him. She tried to reach his tongue, he gave it to her. He pushed aside her towel that covered her beautiful thighs. They couldn’t stop tasting each other’s mouth. He touched her womanhood, caressing the folds. She's so wet down there already, he touched her labia, opened it. She moaned and left the kiss. She leaned forward and whispered in his ear.

“darl... please. Make me even more wet than this. I miss those big long fingers in me.” She said while biting his earlobe. Gangtae closed his eyes, enjoying her lips biting his. He kissed her shoulder as his middle finger started entering her vagina. She's so warm and wet. He kissed her chin, then bit it.

“you’re so wet down here.” Gangtae said.

He started moving his finger back and forth slowly. Munyeong couldn’t help it but moaned melodiously in his ears. Her soul was like on cloud nine. She couldn’t even breathe properly this time. The way his finger moved inside her. Gangtae bent his finger up and touched her G-spot. She really wanted to cum, but she held it. She bit her lips hard, feeling him.

“More.. More fingers.” she begged while kissing his soft cheek.

“more what, baby?” he asked & stopped his finger’s movement.

He smirked.

“more finger inside me, sir.” she desperately answered.

“inside you?”

“Yes, here.” she touched her womanhood itself to tell him that she really desperately wanted him to finger her so hard, touching her swollen clit. It's getting more sensitive this time, she fell into the lust so deep.

Watching & hearing her desperately wanted him was such a blessing for him. It turned him on even more. He added another finger. Damn, she’s still so tight & warm. He really wanted to thrust his manhood so hard inside her and make her scream his name.

“You’re so tight, baby. Hmmm.” his fingers were so wet.

She was about to explode, he accelerated his finger’s movement in and out. Munyeong couldn’t hear anything, just her moan and his breath on her neck. She couldn’t hold it anymore.

“ Cum for me, Munyeong. Give it to me, baby.” She finally reached the climax and was like in heaven. she fell to his bare chest, her breast pressed his. He kissed her shoulder.

“well done, munyeong.” She tried to catch her breath again, leaned back to stare at him. He stared at her while sucking her wetness from his fingers. it was too hot. “It’s sweet.”

“Your turn, darl.” She tried to get up from his lap, when she wanted to kneel down, gangtae stood up and stopped her. “now, have your dinner first. I will take a shower.” She was surprised how he stopped her to do what he liked the most. He took her towel from the floor and wrapped it around her naked body.

“are you sure? you don’t want me to do it?” she stepped forward and put her hand on his chest. He held her hand and kissed her hand. “dress up, and have your dinner. I will be there after shower.” She smiled but it was not just a smile but smirked at him. She walked towards their big cupboard, opened it. GangTae went to the bathroom. Munyeong chose her nightgown and dressed up.

10PM

Munyeong finished her dinner so fast without him, she was so hungry. She thought she wanted something which could make her happier. She smiled.

Gangtae walked down the stairs and entered the kitchen. He found munyeong was eating ice cream and sitting on the table. “Hi” she greeted him and licked the spoon. He was bare chest and only wearing his fleece pajama pants. It showed his sexy waist and V line. He came closer to her, stood between her thighs. “You finished your dinner, good.” He pet her. He opened his mouth asking for ice cream from her. She fed herself and put the ice cream cup beside her. She put her hand on his neck and pulled him closer, kissing him. GangTae could taste the ice cream in her mouth. so sweet. She gave the icecream thru the kiss. He sucked the vanilla flavour from her tongue. Her favorite flavour. Both could hear the sound of their kiss. They broke the kiss.

“It’s yummy,” he said and smiled.

“The icecream or my tongue?” Munyeong asked.

“BOTH.” He looked into her eyes. she’s so beautiful in white nightgown with her long hair

She pushed him slowly to make some spaces. She got off the table, stepped closer to him, her hands slipped from moving over Gangtae’s abs to untie the strings of his pants. She wanted to see and feel his manhood. The manhood that had given her pleasure many times, that felt so right inside of her. She already wanted all of Gangtae inside of her, but right now she wanted to pleasure him. Down came his pants and She was blown away. He was fully erected already, how? his manhood was so thick, long and just perfect.

“What are you looking at, Munyeong? Look you have already made me hard, It’s throbbing to be inside of you.” She blushed like crazy hearing Gangtae’s straightforwardness. Munyeong slowly ran her tongue down his chest, she licked his nipples, his abs, and stopped until she was now on her knees and in front of Gangtae’s manhood.

“aahhhh munyeong.” Gangtae moaned as Munyeong had just ran her fingers over his sensitive balls. Gangtae’s moans were like music to her ears, she wanted to hear them more. She slowly moved her hands from his balls to grasp his hard erected manhood. She began moving her hand back and forth along it erecting it more.

“fuck munyeong, don’t stop keep going baby” Gangtae encouraged her. This was heaven, he really didn’t want to stop, he wanted to feel her mouth now around his manhood.

Munyeong could feel Gangtae’s manhood throbbing in her hand, she smirked and looked up at her hubby. while maintaining eye contact with gangtae she slowly guided his manhood to her mouth and began moving her mouth back and forth. Gangtae grabbed hold of her hair tightly and moaned. Munyeong continued to tease Gangtae by slowly licking his manhood and lightly scraping her teeth across it. Gangtae couldn’t take her teasing and he slowly began thrusting in her mouth. Munyeong took as much of him as she could inside of her mouth. while her mouth did its magic she continuously ran her hands on his balls, lightly squeezing them.

“ahh munyeong.. fuck… I think I am going to cum already baby. your mouth is magical, I just want to keep thrusting in it. ahhh” Munyeong could feel Gangtae’s manhood tensing up. She kept sucking it, took as much as she could.

He reached the climax and cum in her mouth. She swallowed it, back to clean his wetness on his manhood by licking it. Munyeong pulled up his pants, She stood up. Gangtae stroked her lips, and trying to breathe properly after the blow job She gave to him.

“You tasted so good.” she licked her lips. Gangtae kissed her lips, she opened her mouth. they kissed like their life depended on it. He broke the kiss and carried her to their room. She couldn't take her eyes off Gangtae. Her husband was truly art. They reached the room, Gangtae put her on the bed and kissed her forehead. She closed her eyes, enjoying his kiss. She felt so much love. Gangtae was lying next to her, pulling her closer into a hug. Mun Yeong made his arm as a pillow. they stared at each other. Gangtae stroked his wife's beautiful face affectionately.

“I can’t believe that I’m with you now, here.” He said and was still staring at her. She smiled.

“How much do you love me, Moon Gang Tae?” She asked.

“How much do you love me, Ko Mun Yeong?” He asked her the same question.

“so much.” She answered. She was admiring him.

“then, my love is more than your ‘so much’.” She chuckled and punched his strong bare chest softly. “It’s not the answer to my question, please” She pouted. He tightened his embrace, kissed her nose. “Munyeong, how can I explain the number of stars in the night sky, hmmm?''. Every time Gangtae explains how he loves her, Munyeong was always touched and carried away. She really could feel his love for her in many ways. He always showed her his love. She’s the luckiest woman in this world, she thought. “I’m so lucky to have you as my wife and best friend, Ko Mun Yeong.” he said as munyeong looked at him back in his yes. She pulled him and kissed his lips. They broke the kiss. She rested her head on his chest. Both fell asleep.

in the morning 7AM

Gangtae tried to wake Munyeong by kissing her, she was annoyed and woke up. He moved lazily and still wanted to continue sleeping. while gangtae looked fresh and dressed casually. He's wearing his white polo shirt and jeans. Munyeong didn't realize that. Gangtae smiled.

“Wake up, baby.” He stroked her long hair. She opened her eyes again. “hmm why? You have to go to the office, right?” then she sat. Gangtae touched her cheek. “I don’t want to go.” She realized that he was in his polo shirt. “Where are you going so early in the morning?” She asked. “take a shower first then I will tell you where we are going, wear that dress okay? I'll be waiting for you downstairs.” She nodded and he kissed her forehead. after he got out of the room. She did what he wanted, took shower & wore the Red dress he bought for her. She applied minimal makeup and didn't forget the lipstick which matched her red dress. she tied her hair. and it exposed her neck more and her cleavage which showed always seductive. She looked at herself in the mirror.

“You are the most beautiful woman, Ko Mun Yeong.” She said to herself. She always praised herself in the mirror as all women should do, She thought. she walked downstairs, she found out that Gangtae stood there with Roses bouquet smiling at her. He walked forward to get closer and they were face to face.

“Happy anniversary, my wife. You looked beautiful.” he said as he gave the roses to her. He chuckled. MunYeong couldn't find the words to express her feelings. She was so touched, happy. many things. GangTae continued his words. “are u ready?”. She nodded. both left their home with their car. along the way, Munyeong couldn’t stop looking at him and the roses. He made her love rose even more. The rose was his favorite flower. She knew it. He once told her when they were kids that He would give the rose to his lovely woman in the future. All this time, he always gave dandelions to her because Munyeong really liked dandelions. but this time, he gave the roses. Munyeong realized their direction. “an airport? why are we here?” she asked. Gangtae stopped the car and they got out of the car, held each other’s hands and walked to his private jet. The flight attendants greeted them. Munyeong & Gangtae had a seat side by side. She smiled at him. “Where? Where are we going? I’m asking you. this is last time. don’t make me curious.” Gangtae made her so curious about their destination. “our new mansion in Tanzania, nearby Serengeti National Park.” Gangtae said.

“WHAT? You bought a new mension? nearby serengeti?” She was surprised. she had no idea that he would do that. She rested her head on his shoulder. She couldn’t stop smiling, she was so happy. Both really enjoyed the flight.

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2 days in Tanzania, 10 PM at Mension.

They came back from Serengeti National Park and had dinner.

“Did you see the baby elephants ? They were so cute. I really wanna pet one.” Munyeong said as she walked ahead of him. He followed her then carried her to their room. He looked at her so deep. Munyeong knew that stare, full of love, lust. She warned herself about that stare, she was wondering. what’s next? she must be ready for the next thing. She wore a black summer casual short dress. GangTea Couldn't take his eyes off from her, He wanted her so bad. Munyeong looked around the entire room. so many rose petals on the bed, the floor, even a rose bouquet on the bed. He lowered munyeong from his arms, letting her enjoy the moments. She walked to bed and took the rose bouquet. She really loved the smell of roses. Gangtae hugged her from the back, put his hands on her stomach. Munyeong could feel his bare chest already against her back. He began slowly kissing her neck and leaving bite marks there. She smelled like roses. Gangtae couldn’t control himself and his hands squeezed her breast. She moaned. Munyeong already felt his hardened manhood on her ass.

“take off this dress.” He huskily whispered in her ears while kissing and sucking on her earlobe. He took the roses and put it in their bed. She could see them in the mirror, she could see him. He kissed her shoulder. “why don't you just take off this dress?” She put her hand on his hand which was still kneading her breast as if she helped him to knead it harder.

She turned around, she could tell that Gangtae was lost in lust. The way He looks at her lips like he was ready to eat her up. They couldn’t help it, but began kissing each other’s lips so deep. Munyeong unzipped his pants, removed his pants and the underwear. He was fully naked. Gangtae took off her dress while kissing. He pushed her slowly on the bed and laid Munyeong.He was naked and She was stil with her G string. Gangtae took the rose bouquet that was beside Munyeong and grabbed a rose stalk. She had no idea what he was gonna do with that rose. Gangtae again kissed her lips very deeply. pulled out his tongue to explore Munyeong's mouth. She opened her mouth and welcomed his tongue. They exchanged saliva there even if only the sound of their hot kiss could be heard. He stroked her hardened nipple with the rose.

“Ahhhh.” Munyepng moaned in his mouth. He broke the kiss and looked into her eyes. He put the rose beside her. “these are mine.” He said and squeezed her breast. while still kneading her left breast in a circular motion. He then began licking her nipple and biting it. He sucked her breast, Munyeong was on cloud nine. She caressed his head and pressed it deeper. Gangtae left endless bite marks all over her breast, “Munyeong I swear I will eat these delicious creamy boobs of yours. They’re so addictive.” He said while still sucking and squeezed them. She smirked at his dirty word, she loved it always.

“Who’s stopping you Gangtae, they are all yours.” She replied. His hands took off her G string. damn, it was so wet. He could see it. He ran the rose to her pussy. Munyeong didn’t expect that from him. She opened her legs, let him do it. he stroked her pussy with the rose. “gangtae… ahh.. what are u doing there..” She gasped. she pulled his hair. He smiled.

“making you wet even more, baby. geez..you’re so wet and red.” He kept stroking her pussy with the rose while staring at her face. she was so hot with her mouth open and moaning his name. she grabbed the sheet. she couldn’t feel her feet anymore, GangTae pressed the rose deeper. “You ruined my rose, baby. your wetness. It’s getting wet.” He said. Munyeong grabbed his hand. She licked her lips. “Stop it, gangtae. i can't hold it anymore.” She got up. they were looking at each other. He made munyeong sit and looked in the mirror. Gangtae was in her back. his dick against her butt. Both looked in the mirror while gangtae still held the rose. He opened her legs. “Look at you, baby.” He again stroked the rose on her pussy. “You know what else is mine, wifey? This sweet wet juicy pussy. Baby, You are so wet.” He kneaded her boob. She turned aroud, pushed him to lay down on the bed. “Eat me out, hubby.” with that Munyeong gently sat on gangtae’s face her pussy ontop his mouth. Gangtae gripped onto her thighs, put the rose and began licking her labia first.

“ahhh.. gangtae more more please.” Munyeong loudly moaned her command to her hubby.

Munyeong’s labia swelled as she was extremely turned on. Gangtae’s next target her clitoris which would give her extreme pleasure. He teasingly licked her clit slowly, feeling her body shake with excitement Gangtae began licking faster. Munyeong began moving her hips to make Gangtae’s licks feel faster on her clit. Gangtae’s hands moved from her thighs to grab her boobs. He began squeezing them and his tongue began moving in and out of her pussy at rapid pace.

“darl I am going to come. I can’t hold it.” She whimpered to Gangtae breathlessly. He wanted to taste all of her sweetness but he didn’t want her to come yet, he wanted to come together.

Gangtae lifted her by her waist and placed her on his lap again coming up so that she was stradding him and they were face to face. Both were catching their breathe, Munyeong’s breast heaved up and down rapidly and she saw Gangtae’s face all wet. She blushed heavily. Munyeong moved her hand to wipe Gangtae’s face but he grabbed her hand.

He moved her fingers to his mouth wiping her wetness onto her fingers. and then he guided her fingers to his mouth, He savoured her taste from her fingers, licking and sucking them. This turned Munyeong on extremely.

“Gangtae enough, I am so wet, I need you NOW!”

“and when was I stopping you? I too need you.”

She pushed him down slowly, Munyeong layed on top of him. She kissed every inch of Gangtae’s face and slowly moved to his neck. The bites she had left him last week had already started turning deep shades of red. She kissed each one and went down to his nipples and gave him the same pleasure. Licking them, and sucking them all the while she rubbed her womanhood with Gangtae’s manhood, and her butt grazing his thighs. If possible Gangtae felt his manhood hardened for the billionth time that night.

“Come on Munyeong I want to be inside of you, baby. I can’t take it longer.” Gangtae was restless now he was about to change positions to bring himself on top when Munyeong’s soft hands took hold of his arousal making him moan in pleasure.

“Patience my dear hubby.” Munyeong smirked.

She then lifted her hips up and rubbed his dick across her entering making herself moan so load.

“Gangtae your dick is so thick, it feels so good againts my wet pusyy. it will feel even better inside it.” saying that she adjusted her hips and inserted gangtae’s manhood into her opening.

“ahhh gangtae, you are so much thicker in this position.” Munyeong said as she slowly was taking all of gangtae into her. She was finding it harder doing this while being on top it felt as if the length of his manhood had increased somehow.

“Baby, it’s just your pussy, fuck it’s so damn tight.” Gangtae moaned as Munyeong began vigorously moving her hips.

She was riding her husband. she was so full that she was slowing down but Gangtae took hold of her ass and helped her move faster. She looked so beautiful, her long hair, her expressions now.

“darl, I’m coming. I’m coming.” Munyeong moaned in pleasure.

“Hold it a little longer baby, we will come together. wait for me.” Gangtae told her. He took hold of her waist and began moving his hips thrusting himself into her. He was slow at first but eventually picked up his pace. Munyeong couldn’t hear or see anything. she was in heaven, she loved this position Gangtae felt so big.

“Ahhhhhh.” they both moaned as they reached their orgasms together. Munyeong fell ontop of Gangtae her soft mounds pressing against his chiseled chest, this already ignited a fire in Gangtae again! Munyeong felt it, he was still inside of her and he was hardened again. before she could say anything Gangtae’s arm wrapped across her butt and the other across her back and he flipped over so now he was ontop.

“That was hot as hell baby. I love you so much, Ko mun yeong. Thank you for giving me so much pleasure. But now, it’s my turn.” He said as his chocolate orbs grew dark.

He moved his fingers to their attached pussy and dick. “Let's taste our love my baby.” Gangtae smeared the mixture of their love onto Munyeong’s lips, licked it and inserted his tongue into her mouth. Munyeong sucked on Gangtae’s tongue and they both tasted.

“we taste damn good don’t we love?” Gangtae chuckled.

“Yes sir, You are my favourite taste.” Munyeong giggled while caressing his face lovingly.

“Oh munyeong you are making me crazy I cannot get enough of you. I need to taste you more my wife.” Gangtae expressed.

He began sucking on her lower lip, devouring it, pulling it, licking it. Her chubby cheeks which he loved kissing so much, this time he gently bit them and licked them. moving down to her neck it was time to give her the same marks she gave him. Gangtae planted kisses all over starting from her jaw to her neck. Munyeong entangled her hands into his hair. He loved that feeling.

He bit her neck giving her his signs of passion. to soothe it he licked all over her neck. He moved down to her breast gently kissing each one. He had already given her plenty bites there. He licked her nipples and bit them.

“ahhh yes ahhh gangtae that feels amazing, please more.” she moaned.

Gangtae purposely began moving his head down away from her mouds when munyeong aggressively tugged his hair and smashed his mouth onto her left breast. Gangtae smirked knowing that was what she wanted, he had just wanted to play with her. He sucked her boob as if there was milk in it. He suddenly felt her womanhood tighten around his manhood.

“Gangtae please move inside of me. fuck me hard I want you again so bad.” Munyeong pleaded to Gangtae.

“Your wish is my command, my love.”

Gangtae slowly pulled most of his dick out of Munyeong and then pounded it inside of her in one hard fast thrust.

“Ahhh more more darl, keep going.” Munyeong screamed in esctasy.

“love, open your eyes, look at me. I want to see you while we make love.” Gangtae requested her while still moving inside of her.

Munyeong slowly opened her eyes that asjusted and she saw her greek god like husband. there was sweat covering his face and body but he still looked damn hot. he was moving in her fast and roughly now, Munyeong felt as if his dick was touching all the way to her womb, it felt amazing. Munyeong lifted her hips a bit and began moving them unison with gangtae’s. She wanted to feel him even deeper inside of her. they were moving in sync.

“Love, I am coming now. let’s come together.” Gangtae spoke short of breathe.

They exploded together and Gangtae collapsed on munyeong, his head resting on her breast. Munyeong caressed his hair.

“I love you and only love you, Ko mun yeong.” gangtae spoke.

“I love you too and will always love only you, Moon Gang tae.” munyeong replied.

and with that the two lovers embraced each other tightly, still inside one another, and smiled while falling asleep. Knowing very well their love will continue the following morning.

THE END 🌹💦

[inglourious-imagines]

Engaged - part 2 (Lewis "Nix" Nixon)

Requested by: @real-fans (part 2) & @floydtab (fluff)

Summary: After the stressful yet successful evening of introducing your fiancé to your parents, here comes the second challenge - they invited you and Lewis Nixon to spend a weekend with them in a cottage.

Author's Note: There might or might not be another last part to this but I'm not sure.

Taglist: @alienoresimagines @floydtab @kyra3155 @real-fans @meteora-fc @not-john-watsons-blog @band-of-brothers-cz @tealaquinn @ok-roemanov

Part 1

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.

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I'm a man. I'm not a hero.

When her parents announced her the offer, she was taken away by the sudden friendliness. 

"Is this a test or are you genuinely asking me to visit our cottage with Nix?" Y/N questioned them, eyes narrowed, suspecting something.

"No! Honey, we really want to meet Louis!" her mother exclaimed with a warming smile. 

"It's Lewis, mom. His name's Lewis."

"Just bring him along, Louis or Lewis. It's gonna be fun!"

But Y/N wasn't so sure about that. Her mother was convinced that the weekend's gonna be tremendous and that was exactly what made Y/N feel slightly uncomfortable.

•••

They sat quietly in the car next to each other holding hands, both of them lost in their own thoughts. Her parents were already there and waiting only for them. 

"I'm not gonna lie, we're pretty fucked." Nixon broke the silence, his eyes didn't leave the road once as he was the one driving.

"They don't even remember you name! Could you believe that?" Y/N exclaimed staring out of the window completely irrelevant to the fact that Lewis just stated something.

"We're so damn pretty fucking fucked." he repeated as he was obviously in the same state of mind like her. Both of them panicking in their own heads. They didn't need anyone who responds but someone who listens.

•••

The dinner went surprisingly smooth. No bigger incident, no arguments, no death glare at anyone at the table.

"It's been going too well so far." Y/N whispered to Nix who was set next to her as they gathered in a living room to watch some TV. 

"I'm expecting troubles, don't worry. Something's gonna happen." Nix smirked cupping her cheek quickly, "it has to."

"I hid another extra bottle of Vat '69 in your suitcase if there's gonna be a crisis."

Nixon's head shot up and he looked at her surprisingly. His eyes shined with sparkles and his happy smile that goldened his face was so contagious. "And that's why I love you so fucking much, Mrs Nixon." Lewis whispered leaning in for a kiss.

"You better not call me that in front of them. Plus you're being way too close to me than they'd like and that hand of yours on my inner thigh is not making it any better." 

"I couldn't care less. The point is, do you like it?"

"Lewis Nixon, I'm literally going to marry you in two weeks. I think you know the answer very well." 

Her father clapped his hands as he glanced at the duo with a suspicious  stare. 

"So tell me, Jackson, how did you two get together?" her mother smiled probably too sweetly.

"It's Nixon, Lewis Nixon. Not Jackson." Y/N frowned being irritated about the way they treated the most important man in her life. "It's not that hard to remember it." she added quietly as she shook her head. 

"Okay, I'll tell the story then." Nixon said glancing at her seeing her angry face.

•••

It didn't happen right away.

It took them quite a while to give in and admit each other's feelings. From the moment they both said "It's a can of peaches, sir." to Sobel, they started falling. Falling so deeply, dearly and completely in love with the other one.

But the breaking point took place in Dick Winters's room, right after the crossroads operation. Y/N was quietly sipping on her drink in the corner hidden in a shadow while Richard was writing the wanted report for Colonel Sink. 

"Just allow yourself a short break, Dick. It doesn't have to be a novel." Y/N rolled her eyes as she poured herself another glass - apparently the last one. She placed the empty bottle back into the footlocker carefully with a cheeky smirk. 

"You sound so much like Nix right now. If you two ever get together, the world will be in such a trouble." Dick chuckled, his eyed still fixated on the paper. 

Y/N just started to open her mouth to respond with some snarky remark but she heard the door open and when Lewis Nixon stepped into the room with an empty bottle in his hand tapping on it, she decided to shut up. 

Now it was Dick's turn to roll his eyes as he stood up and walked over to his footlocker opening it for Lewis to take his hidden Vat '69. 

As soon as Winters sat down, Nixon immediately shouted "what the fuck" out loud with a confused yet angry expression on his face. 

"It's empty!" the Captain exclaimed throwing his hands in the air. "The bottle's fucking empty!"

Silence fell upon the room. Nixon wasn't able to process the information. 

"It's your footlocker but you're a non-drinker. So who the hell could possibly-" Lewis suddenly stopped as a wave of realisation flew over him. He turned slowly to the female Lieutenant who was trying so hard not to burst out laughing.

"You!" Lewis pointed at her taking a few steps towards her.

"I don't regret a single thing." Y/N giggled, her eyes shining and her smile so contagious Nixon simply had to chuckle too. He couldn't stay mad at her for too long.

"God knows you're lucky that I love you so fucking much." 

And this sudden confession, those few words changed Lewis Nixon's and Y/N Y/L/N's life forever.

•••

"That's surely a way how to meet, Y/N. Drink his entire bottle of alcohol." her father frowned.

"With all respect, sir," Nixon interrupted, "I'm very happy she did so." 

Her father stared at the duo clearly not satisfied with his daughter's choice of partner. Her mother rather didn't say anything just glancing from her to him. 

"I know you're not pleased with Lew here and I love you, truly, but your opinion won't change my mind. I love this man next to me more than I love myself or more than I have anyone ever loved in my whole life. He saved me in every way possible a person can be saved. I will marry him so I'm asking you to overcome this problem and come to our wedding. We both be very happy to see you there." Y/N suddenly burst out, finally fed up with her parents' behaviour. 

"I can assure you, Mr and Mrs Y/L/N, that I will take care of your daughter the best I can. I'd rather die than have something happen to her. She completes me." Nixon joined the conversation, being so serious as he unconsciously took Y/N's hand.

"Well," her father cleared his voice, "if you see it like that, you have my permission. But if you hurt her, I'll have your head served, okay?"

Nixon shuddered a little under his glare but forced himself to smile that soon turned into a genuine sincere grin, "Thank you, sir. It means a lot."

And for the first time, her father's face had a pleased expression.

Maybe he was the right person for her after all.

Maybe this is the person his daughter's gonna spend the rest of her life with.

"Welcome to the family, Nixon. Welcome to the family."