#there's over a hundred other people in there that aren't fucking disgusting

[korekiyo-unfortunately]

I hope they get sick of me someday. They deserve better than me, I really don't know what my appeal is. I'd end it myself if I wasn't so selfish

[simpjaes]

mlt to be into messy sex like they get turned on the messier it gets eg. squirting, cumming on your face/other body parts

MTL: hyung line + messy sex/cum play

warning: messy stuff involving spit, cum, sweat, squirt (+implied piss), period sex

under the cut so people aren't forced to see details.

most

heeseung: you said messy and i'm writing this with purpose specifically but, squirting is his fave thing ever. every girl he gets on top if will squirt for him or he ain't calling them back. this does happen to involve a lot of water drinking before hand, and a very locked bathroom door lmao. that aside, i think heeseung would be really into cum play as well. coming in you, on your ass, thighs, legs, feet, tits, hands, and/or back. would also probably come all over himself if it comes down to it. Same for you, he's obsessed with your wet, and would probably try to drown in it if he could.

jay: (im insane for him rn pls look the other way) i imagine jay would be pretty into the messy blowjobs. i'm talking like, cum and saliva bubbling out of the corners of your mouth, tears running down your cheeks, etc. for him, there's something about being pussy drunk when his girl is cock drunk in turn, and it always leads to the messiest and best sex. The head you give is is loud, wet, lots of slurping sounds, lots of gagging. the head he gives is equally as loud, though he's probably moaning a lot through it too. i think he's the type that wants you to collect his cum on your tongue and let him watch you swallow it. also the type to fill your mouth full of his cum, tell you to hold it in without swallowing just to see it dribble out of the sides of your mouth. he thinks it's gross and disgusting, but entirely too hot that you do it for him.

sunghoon: hoon is probably super into coming on your face if it's not inside of you. not only bc he thinks you look hot like that, but because it genuinely just feels so fucking good to him for everything to be wet and messy, especially in the way you indulge him and thumb the mess into your mouth, proving that you like it just as messy. same goes for when he's fucking you too. i think he'd be into body fluids, and want them all over the place. squirting? man, he would be in heaven, especially if you let him open his own mouth at it. also probably really into spitting in your mouth but thats just me.

jake: messy with it without intention because he's always been that way. I mean, bro probably half-drained of cum before he even puts it in you due to the sheer amount of fucking pre-cum he gives. the type to be a huge fan of squirting as well, almost always abusing the fuckkkk out of your g-spot just so he can get you as messy as he always is. also the type to want to be fucking drenched in you and himself by the time it's all done. one hundred percent would probably be into period sex too. not necessarily anything involving his mouth but man, being covered in anything you offer is something that would drive him insane. anything sticky, anything thick, anything that helps the slide, really.

least:

[who-knew-a-sheep-can-write]

Werewolf Bigby Wolf x Reader Headcanons

🌙 Bigby's been a werewolf for a good handful of centuries already, turned right before they all had to seek refuge in the Mundy World hundreds of years ago during the Saelum Trials. It may seem like he has a perfect handle on things, but in reality, he doesn't.

🌙 He used to lose control all of the time, especially in the first year. There were so many rumors and stories that came from him doing so that they've lasted centuries to the modern day. People nowadays brush it off as fake or bring up how back then, glasses weren't a thing so they were all crazy which is a breath of relief on Bigby's part.

🌙 He rarely loses control these days. The last time he could remember off of the top of his head would be the whole Crooked Man incident getting gunned down in the alley. In some sick and twisted way deep down inside, he loves the feeling of hunger and relief that washes over him when he lets go but he will never say it out loud.

🌙 His will isn't the only thing to keep him sane. Centuries of experiments and spells and charms and trinkets the thirteenth floor conjured up also helps, but they all have their breaking point. At least he doesn't turn on full moons anymore and go on a rampage through New York like in the movies.

🌙 There are times, however, when even the thirteenth floor's magic isn't enough and Bigby's iron will breaks. It's rare, but when it happens, it's messy.

🌙 When you two started dating, he could feel the beast inside of him writhing with life, almost like it wanted to come out just to be with you. It was a shock at first, he had never felt like that, especially when he had his little thing for Snow. He likes that feeling though.

🌙 Be careful with certain scents. Bigby's nose is like no other and very strong scents can give him horrible headaches. He won't say anything unless you ask him what's wrong. He loves the smell of you naturally already, there's no need for all of these sprays and scented lotions.

🌙 Speaking of scents, he can also dictate your emotions. It was a skill he taught himself over time. He mostly uses it to try and catch people lying, but's found it useful to detect if you're in distress or even if you're feeling very flirty.

🌙 It's the same with his hearing; Another skill he's honed over the years to weed out the truth from the bullshit lies he's fed. He often listens for your heartbeat during the day if you're around the Woodlands.

🌙 You knew what he looked like, but you hadn't seen it in so long. Bigby would sheepishly look away as you oogled at him in his form. He liked the way you looked at him with those eyes, and he could practically smell your satisfaction, but he wouldn't say something.

🌙 He has a bit of a temper, so flares tend to happen. It's often just the glowing eyes, but there have been times where the claws came out. He doesn't mean for you to see him like that, often worried that you may suddenly see him as the brute many others see him as.

🌙 Speaking of that special little side of him, he loves it when you card your fingers in his thicker hair- especially when you scratch lightly at his scalp or even at the fuzzy sideburns he grows.

🌙 He also likes it when you idly play with his fingers should you hold his hands when he's like that. You're admiring his sharp, black claws without a care for how dangerous they are. It puts his striking nerves at ease.

🌙 Compliment him. It catches him off guard and gets the wolfman blushing and stuttering when you compliment his furry little self. His yellow eyes, his solid body that radiates heat, his strong arms that can hold you like you weigh nothing.

🌙 When he's full wolfman, he often shies away from your gaze at first, worried that you may come to your senses and be disgusted by him- But you aren't. He's instead shocked when you approach him with that smile he fell in love with.

🌙 He's tall as fuck when he's turned, often having to hunch over in your apartment and duck to get through doorways. He often fills up the doorway with his hulking body, his body is broad and muscular, it can be a bit awkward maneuvering around inside.

🌙 He often loves it when you fall asleep while he's all fuzzy, preferring you to sleep on top of him with his beastly arms wrapped around you. There's no need for a blanket as his furry body is enough to keep you warm.

🌙 He likes to tease you when he's like that. Nipping lightly with his fangs, his claws lingering or splaying his large paw across your body, dwarfing you with his size. Anything you say to scold him jokingly earns you a deep wolfish chuckle.

🌙 If you're a fable that also has a different form, it comforts him when you turn and lounge around with him in the comforts of either of your apartments- mostly yours as it's bigger than his by a long shot.

🌙 He's a protective person, it's really in his nature. You're his, and Bigby gets a sour taste in his mouth when certain Fables get around you. He doesn't mean to be jealous and over-protective, he's just acting on his wolfish instincts.

🌙 But if something happens? Hell will break loose. He prays that it would never come to it where it's another Crooked Man situation where he had to turn to protect Snow and almost lost complete control. He saw the pure fear painted all over her face, he doesn't think he could handle that same look from you.

🌙 He lays awake some nights where his nightmares wake him from his sound sleep. It's all the same shit, constant worries pulling at the back of his mind. It scares him to the bone knowing that there's the possibility that he could fully lose control and even hurt you, even with that possibility being so low.

[thedevilsmemes]

ASTARION ANCUNIN QUOTES ~ BALDUR'S GATE 3 SENTENCE MEME!

"Hello, darling. Don't be shy, I promise I not to bite until we've been formally introduced."

"The tadpole's influence broke his dominance over me, and now I can finally pursue the one thing I've hungered for these long dark years."

"I'll be the last thing the bastard ever sees."

"Given that my choices were 'eternal life' or 'bleed to death on the street', I took him up on the offer."

"It was only afterwards I realized just how long 'eternity' could be."

"By the Hells. Sex, my dear. A night of passion."

"I'm out of wine and flowers, so I hope an introduction will suffice."

"And I wish I was drinking out of the skull of everyone who's ever wronged me. Life is tough."

"I've been waiting. Waiting since the moment I laid eyes on you. Waiting... to have you."

"Yes darling, that's what we call a lie."

"All I want is a little fun, is that so much to ask?"

"Why hello. Welcome to my humble party."

"Oh, we're lying to each other now? Excellent."

"But... you're no stranger now. Just strange."

"I hate it. This is awful."

"Wait! Don't interrupt them. Let me do it. They sound disgusting."

"I don't know, I'm sure a vampire spawn could still rip out your heart."

"My, My. Who knew our friend had so much blood in them?"

"Oh, you're such a sweetheart."

"I'm just glad you're being sensible about these revelations. I was worried people might turn up with torches and pitchforks."

"Although, there's still time."

"I already apologised. What more do you want? Unless you're looking for another nibble?"

"Yes, darling? Do you need something?"

"What in the sweet hells were you THINKING activating that lance, I was right there!"

"Next time? No no no, if there is a 'next time' I'll be the one aiming the all-powerful weapon."

"Although, I do appreciate you trying to fix your mistake, just don't do it again!"

"It's just that I happen to be a... what's the best way to put this? A vampire?"

"Oh my honour, the only thing on my mind, is depraved carnal lust."

"You couldn't wait ten seconds before being an absolute freak."

"Oh, good, puns. Because clowns aren't enough of a horror already."

"What? Was it something I said?"

"Really? - Anything in particular?"

"Now, I can't help but notice that one of us is positively drenched in blood. So..."

"At least the smut peddlers of Sharass' Caress will have a field day writing erotic verse about us when we're both dead."

"Hundreds? Urgh, it'll take hours to kill them all. She/He's right, we should just go."

"Oh? Then what do you want?"

"Five seconds into this relationship and I already want to break up with you."

"Oh the one hand, killing Gortash will be fun. On the other, Halsin can be very annoying."

"The man can't stay quiet about 'enjoying the freedom of nature's gifts'. I bet he'd outlaw clothing if he could."

"Good Morning. Thank you for not killing me the other night."

"Of course, what fun! I'm going to fucking kill you."

"I am. And beautiful - not enough people mention that."

"Hmm. Hmm. Thank you for helping me. It was very kind."

"I can't even tell if any of you are acting strange because you've been replaced or because this group is full of weirdos!"

"So... I was wondering if maybe - perhaps - you might be able to..."

"Can you read what's on my damn back? Please?"

"Well, hello... Looking for a cuddle?"

"What are you? No. We are not jumping down there!"

"Oh - eh - Hello again?"

"Easy now. Let's not do anything Hilarious."

"You have a manner of irresistible desperation about you. I like it."

"I'd trust a devil over a vampire any day. I think he likes us."

"Oh, bravo! Encore!"

"Why she sounds positively demented."

"I love it! let's tell her everything!"

"Don't be touchy. I'm sure he meant 'better off dead' as a compliment."

"I'd shake her hand, but she can still snap me in two, so... probably safest to skip it."

"Anyway, it's a brand new day. I'm sure we'll find lots of people for you to kill."

"I must see this. Don't you dare say no."

"Well, this seems like a lovely little spot. The sense of impending doom aside."

"I suppose it was only a matter of time until [ insert name ] took vengeance."

"For the Lady/Lord of loss, She/He does not like losing."

"Come to kill me again, darling?"

"Guilty as charged. Sometimes literally."

"What? No! Don't you dare! This isn't funny!"

"Huh, thank goodness, I was almost worried."

"Nice as it is, she still doesn't have the best hair in the camp."

"Well, I mean... kind of? It's a long story, honestly."

"You'll get back to me? This is important, devil! When?"

"It's not enough we have a gallery of villains to look out for, but now we could be infiltrated by a shapechanger?"

"But you're serious about this? About... us?"

"Tailor's mannequins? I never figured [ insert name ] for a follower of fashion."

"Well done again on besting Baal and all that. It was very twee."

"You filthy devil. I'm shocked."

"Haha! That's - Oh, you're serious."

"Well, of course we can leave him, it's the easiest thing in the world. We just have to keep on walking."

"Well, at least you purr for me..."

"The thing that will decide my fate forevermore? Yes, it has been on my mind, why?"

"Who knows how long before the others go feral without us there to guide them?"

"Let. Me. Go! - Ah... Hello!"

"No, as much as I'd like to become a Lord, ruling over the Underdark's vampire spawn, we have unfinished business with the mind flayers."

"I'm glad you had your fun then. I am here to provide an endless array of delights."

[beansnpeets]

There was a dog found in the town I work in that was brought to the vet clinic. No owner claimed him. The shelter and vet clinic made a post asking someone to foster him because they can only hold him at the clinic's pound for 3 days or he would have to be pts and because they used the word "euthanize" in the post it got shared hundreds of times and tons of people commented saying the town and the vet clinic were horrible and disgusting for "killing" this dog and that they aren't giving him a fair chance and 3 days isn't enough (much the same things I got when I was animal control and trying to place unclaimed dogs).

People just don't understand how limited the resources are. There is just simply not unlimited money to save every single dog. And the vet clinic only has 3 holding kennels. They can't just keep every unclaimed dog that comes to them for an indefinite amount of time. The shelter is currently run solely on fosters and they can't seem to get more people to foster.

So many people so quick to complain, but yet they won't offer any actual help. They won't offer to foster, they won't donate to the shelter, they won't actually do anything other than complain and call the vet clinic evil. I'm so tired of this from people. I do not understand how they cannot grasp that the resources simply aren't there. Where do they think it all comes from? Do they think that money just magically appears in the shelter's bank account? That the vet clinic has acres and acres of space and a ton of staff to care for these unclaimed dogs?

I'm so angry. I'm so angry that people can't fucking understand that there are just more dogs (and other animals) in need of help than there is help. Yeah, sometimes animals have to be euthanized because there is nowhere for them to go. That's why I quit animal control. I spent HOURS on my birthday calling every shelter within 6 hours of me to take a dog. A dog whose owner I KNEW and she made no attempt to claim him because she knew she would have to pay the fines for him being at large. I agonized over this dog and scrambled to find somewhere for him to go. I didn't think I would, but miraculously someone agreed to take him. But then I'd have to do it again for the next dog. And the next. And I decided I couldn't do this every time I had an unclaimed dog. And in the process of messaging shelters I had one tell me I should give him a chance and hold him for longer. I'd already had him 2 days longer than I was supposed to and he was being held in a bathroom in the town's public works building because we didn't have an actual pound or holding facility. I did everything I could and I still almost had to have that dog euthanized. Hardly anyone was willing to help me. I was SO lucky to have found someone that ended up taking him and now he's been adopted and is in a loving home. But that couldn't have happened if nobody stepped up.

So instead of complaining, step up and help.

[a-student-out-of-time]

While I'm not a fan of eating the rich moment ( Due to my capitalistic roots, though I dislike how much government interference there is) I do agree mostly with your assessment.

And not all rich people are awful. JFK for example, came from a rich background and he's still one of my favorite presidents. His brother Robert Kennedy also was an advocate for civil rights.

But besides those two and a few others, that's it.

//Of course, you had people like Andrew Carnegie and John D. Rockefeller, who engaged in some questionable business practices, but ultimately contributed the modern equivalent of billions to charities and scientific research.

//Carnegie even wrote "Gospel of Wealth," where he felt that wealthy people were morally obligated to give their money back to others in society. A view that I also believe in.

//There are absolutely people who use their wealth and influence to do good things for others, from medical research to construction to cleaning the oceans to

//Unfortunately, there are far more wealthy people who are either apathetic or downright cruel to others. They horde their wealth, buy things they absolutely do not need, push legislation through bribery and nepotism, and actively flaunt their power and wealth over the rest of us just because they can.

//Hundreds of millions or even billions aren't enough for them either, so they need to find more things to profit off of, which has lead to everything from copyright policies that fuck over everyone to building dams along rivers that people lived along just so they can sell that water right back to them.

//Their blatant disregard for human life in general is absolutely disgusting. They do not see regular people as people, they see them as either obstacles or resources. This level of detachment, combined with disposable income, is where phrases like "Just stop being poor" come from. They do not understand anything about anything, yet act like they're qualified to discuss everything imaginable.

//And let's not forget the pettiness, childishness and general douchebaggery on display with a lot of them. Look at everything Musk has done on Twitter, like turning the logo into Doge because he was caught in a legal battle over his own cryptocurrency and wanted to pretend like he invented the idea of Doge.

//Then there's what's called Gold-Parachuting, where the people at the top will buy successful companies, destroy them through embezzlement, corner-cutting and corruption, and then sell off everything they can because of an agreement where they'll get more benefits if the company is terminated. Doesn't matter what it does or how many people it'll affect, just as long as they come out as winners.

//These people genuinely do think they're above everything, from regular people to the rules and regulations we have in place for safety standards. Every opportunity they have to horde their insane amounts of wealth, they will take it without hesitation. That's why everything from the Great Recession to the Titan Incident happened.

//So I get what you're saying, but it doesn't change the fact that people have every right to have disdain for these sorts of people, and we know what they mean. When someone says "eat the rich," this is who they're referring to, not the ones who actually contribute to society with charitable acts.

//And it's exactly these sorts of people who would create and fund an organization like Hope's Peak Academy.

[a-random-internet-user]

Hi. I saw your comment on a post about how one cannot argue with fascists, but must kill them instead. You said, "also applies to ruzzians." I would like you to consider that the Russian people do not all approve of Putin's invasion of Ukraine, and many have protested, facing the threat of 20 years of jail time. Many more would protest if they were not so coerced. I would like you to ask yourself what the act of assessing people's character solely by their country of origin or ethnicity makes you.

... Would you tell a jew not to hate germans during WW2?

I do not know who you are and where you are from, and I don't care. I was born and raised in Ukraine. I am here right now. Every day of my life since the start of the war I have lived in horror. I was scared even before 24 of February, after all it didn't start there. I still had hope that that damned country wouldn't attack mine, I hoped they wouldn't slaughter, rape, deport, steal, and starve our people like they did for hundreds of years. It was false hope.

I hate ruzzian people, the thirty thousand of soldiers that now feed our soil could do many thing. They could rebel, they could simply put down their arms, but they didn't do that. They marched on. And they did what they do best: They destroyed. I am sometimes still afraid of looking at the news and seeing another report of a toddler raped by russian soldiers.

The millions of russians in it that could do something, but didn't, they still don't. Over 70% of them support this. They bully and laugh at us for being angry and afraid on the internet, they demand we speak their shit language after centuries of erasing ours. They whine about not having a future while sponsoring the destruction of ours. And those that claim they don't still lash out at us and call us slurs when we don't buy their bullshit. Of course, hopefully, not all of them are like that, but at this point I'm tired of hoping.

Did putler do this himself? No. He wasn't there, unfortunately, if he was he might have gotten killed... Still, that wouldn't stop those people.

I hate him just like any sane person does, but he gave orders, he didn't execute them, the people you try to protect did.

Did putler himself deport the millions of Ukrainians that ruzzia admits they deported? No. The people did.

What do the ruzzians outside of that shithole do about this? They whine. And a lot of them support this genocide. Some even attack the refugees that cannot afford to stay in Ukraine, write disgusting messages on whatever their place of living is, and some even tell them to go back to their country and that no one wants them in whatever country they fled to... I wonder why they aren't living in their beloved ruzzia.

They claim that we have no culture, they dare to say this after destroying and stealing it for centuries. In the 20th century in Ukraine there could be a cultural renaissance, can you guess why it's called the "Shot down Renaissance"?

Are Ukrainians the only victims? Unfortunately no. Many other people had been erased by ruzzians.

My own father could die at any moment protecting his family and country. He isn't even in the military, he signed up for territorial defense.

You do not have the right to tell me, or any other Ukrainian, how to feel about those pieces of shit.

I preferred not post about the shithole's actions here because I use my Twitter for that. Fuck you for giving me a reason to write this.

[watercolormogai]

hi sorry for the mini vent but i'm so tired of having to say i'm pro para because like... imagine it had to be that way with any other disability. "yeah i'm pro autism." "i'm pro bpd" it sounds so fucking stupid. i don't know if i make sense but what i'm trying to say is that it sucks we have to treat paraphilias differently than any other disability or disorder or mental illness. i hope this doesn't come across as like anti-para or anything im bad with words lmfao

honestly ? v feel the same way

it sucks to have vy disorders painted as so horrible and disgusting , no one would actually ever support them except fake troll accounts . it sucks that theres basically no community (besides the radqueer community , but v'm clearly not in that) where there are a lot of people who understand and accept it . even people who "accept" it go on to talk about how "harmful paraphilias" are gross and immoral and only the "non-harmful kinks people pretend are paraphilias" are good and okay .

it absolutely sucks that v have to repeatedly say that v'm pro-para and still have people have no idea what paraphilias actually are and be against them because of that . like you said , nobody has to do that with any other disability , and even when people put "people who believe in narc abuse" on their DNIs there is really no one in the mogai community who is actually like that . meanwhile paraphiles are constantly painted as so incredibly horrible and wrong that people literally side with TERFs and call bigots "better" for not supporting paraphiles .

a lot of the anti-para shit in the community comes from people not actually understanding what paraphilias are or how they work . if v try to say "well someone with BPD isn't inherently violent and abusive because of their violent thoughts , and paraphiles aren't either" , v'm told that v'm ableist and a horrible person for daring to compare two disorders . if v try to say "people think you can cure being attracted to the same gender , but you obviously can't , so it's not very hard to understand that you can't cure being attracted to a child or an animal" , v get called homophobic and harassed for daring to say that pure innocent gay people are even slightly similar to the gross awful pedos . people who hate something are never just going to see one post and then suddenly change . they aren't going to see a hundred posts and even think about changing . a lot of ableists have said that even if it was their best friend who came out as a paraphile , theyd tell them to kill themself . so the lack of knowledge and understanding is going to take a long , long time to change , as absolutely frustrating as that is .

(plus , the fact that people think that any attraction to minors is pedophilia . that is not true and one of the main reasons why v feel the urge to punch anyone who says "i call maps pedophiles because thats what they really are!!!" because no you idiot map means any attraction to minors and pedophilia is only towards prepubescent children . the terms hebephilia , nepiophilia , ephebophilia , etc exist for a reason .)

it absolutely sucks to have to repeatedly say "yes , v support all disabled and neurodivergent people , yes including paraphiles they are still neurodivergent / disordered" . it should be basic common sense that all disabled and neurodivergent people are wonderful and amazing and your disorder doesnt make you a bad person , but for some reason it isnt . it constantly makes ve frustrated and angry because people choose to believe the media and hate paraphiles instead of just listening and understanding . having to say that v'm pro-para over and over is incredibly frustrating and makes ve just wanna hit things because oh vy gods why cant people just stop being so fucking ableist , but as frustrating as it is v know it's not going to change and until then we will just have to keep saying it over and over until people start understanding .

paraphiles being treated as "worse than" or "different" than other disorders is stupid and just ableism . no disorder is "worse than" any other . every disorder is morally neutral no matter what . if a paraphile hurts someone else , it is not "someone abused me because theyre a paraphile" it is "someone abused me becuse theyre a bad person" . "pedophilic abuse" is no more real than "narc abuse" . if an adult grooms a child , they are a predator , and actually that vast majority of predators are not pedophiles at all and the vast majority of pedophiles never groom / abuse anyone , so they probably arent even a pedophile . "dont armchair diagnose anyone" includes calling someone a pedophile because they hurt a child . dont call your abuser a narcissist because they probably werent and even if they were they didnt hurt you because of their npd they hurt you because they were an abuser . it is the same with paraphiles . treating paraphiles as "different" or "inherently wrong" only pushes them further and further away from any sort of help they may want to find and leads them to hurt themselves and others .

sorry that v kinda went off on a rant , but v have A Lot of opinions about this , as you can probably tell lol

[ani-shachaf]

I'm just gonna write a vent post of miscellaneous shit I can't say on my main blog without losing all my friends

anyone else annoyed at those posts going around where goyim are like "omg 30,000 people killed..............how can I go on with my life while this is happening....................." when like. there's so many other hugely tragic things going on in the world. why has this conflict in particular set off an existential crisis, hm? the vast majority of y'all don't have any stakes in this, you're just gonna forget about it like you did with Ukraine. stop with the groveling and the Holocaust inversion

look. people in the Israeli government have said truly horrible shit. but if you're gonna accuse Israel of genocide because of what they say, then why the hell isn't that standard being held to Hamas??????

one thing that's really telling to me is people only now being like "oh no, Israel treated the Holocaust survivors who fled there horribly! they're so evil" if you Actually gave a shit about Jews y'all'd've been talking about that ages ago, held huge events to raise money to help, any number of things! but you don't care. you just want to find any excuse to call for Israel's destruction.

and let's be clear - almost everything I've seen has been calling for a 1 Palestinian state solution. but there's never any discussion of how that actually plays out or what to do about "the Jewish question" beyond "oh y'all're all rich whities, go back to Europe"

are these European countries gonna kick out the people living in the houses that Jewish families fled from and give them back to their descendants? do you think Jews want to go back to towns that collaborated with the Nazis?

not to mention there's hundreds of thousands of Jews who left MENA countries. you think countries with at most 100 Jews currently living there would welcome the huge number of descendants that would pour in? you think they'd even be allowed to return?

and where exactly does that leave the Jews who have always been in the Levant? are you really naive enough to think that after nearly 80 years of fighting, the remaining Jews wouldn't actually be genocided??? (for the record, I don't think a one-state solution where Israel absorbed Gaza and the West Bank would work either; plenty of settlers have proven they can't live peacefully with Palestinians, and I don't think anyone wants to see that happen on a larger scale.)

don't talk to me about ~decolonization~ until Jews have full control over our holy sites. Obviously there's no way the compound would be taken down and a third Temple constructed; Arab countries scream bloody murder when Jews so much as pray there. (are they worried we're gonna do the same fucking thing they did??? lmao) but can we at least get the right to do that? that really shouldn't be restricted to one group.

the fact that people deny that Jews are indigenous to the Levant is fucking absurd. Jews have maintained their connection to their homeland for thousands of years. the fucking Dalai Lama asked Jews for advice on how to maintain Tibetan culture while in exile.

it's also like. I see people be like "you Jews don't own Israel just because your sky daddy said so in some old book, it even says you aren't from here because you had to conquer the land!" and ok sure. I personally as a convert with no known Jewish ancestry don't feel like I have more of a right to live in Eretz Yisrael than non-Jews who've lived there for hundreds to thousands of years. do you care about the historical and archaeological evidence that says Jews were Canaanites who eventually split off though or......? also these same people will be like "oh you should respect indigenous people and their religion; their oral tradition preserves facts about their past" while again, dismissing Jewish texts wholesale

I've seen tons of people calling out the soldiers that posted a video of them sniffing panties, and they should! it's deplorable and disgusting behavior! the sexual violence committed on 10/7? either "deserved," denied, or complete silence. it's fucking terrifying that people will justify that kind of thing in the name of decolonization.

I know nobody talks about antisemitism besides Jews, but it really is depressing to see absolutely Nobody talking about the horrific rise in antisemitic violence. It's all "uwu I'm anti-zionist, not antisemitic! it's actually very easy to criticize Israel without being antisemitic!" *does fuck-all to actually help Jewish people*

no one talks about the other countries involved either except to cheer on the Houthis for like a week before I saw maybe 1 (one) post about them being slavers and everybody shut up. didn't even bother reblogging that info to spread awareness or making a post like "whoopsie I didn't take 5 seconds to look up what this group is!"

and I stg if I have to see someone post that Israel sterilized Ethiopian Jews one more time I'm gonna lose it. there was miscommunication about temporary birth control. that shouldn't have happened! but it's a far cry from actually permanently sterilizing thousands of people.

I saw another post by a convert a while back saying something along the lines of "I'm anti-Zionist bc I think Judaism doesn't need a homeland anymore" and firstly like. Judaism is all about Eretz Yisrael; even if you don't like the modern country you can't really separate Judaism from the land it originated from. secondly unless OP was zera Yisrael, I don't really think it's our place as converts to decide whether Jews as a whole don't need a homeland like. yikes 😬

[someweirdowriting]

☆— Sonya has a crush

Claudine sighs and sinks to the ground. She pulls her knees up to her chest and sighs again. A moment of silenced passes before she (once again) sighs.

For a moment, Sonya debates if going to prison for murder is actually so bad. Sure, prison would suck, but she's rich and doesn't have to worry about jobs or money.

Don't rich people have some kind of get-out-of-jail-free card?

Then, Claudine sighs again.

Manslaughter it is, Sonya thinks and spins her chair around.

"What?" Her tone of voice is frustrated. She is just one sigh away from punching Claudine in the face.

"I'm bored," the brunette whines. "When did you start doing homework, anway. Aren't you the one who always brags about how she doesn't have to do any homework ever because school is so easy?"

Well, that is true. Sonya glances back at the essay she is writing. Why is she doing homework?

Her brown eyes once again find the milk chocolate skinned girl sitting on the ground, a pout on her lips. Claudine looks like she dressed up. She's wearing a white dress with a pink floral pattern, a ribbon in her hair.

"Salyor-" Sonya starts but stops herself. It would just sound stupid to blame Saylor for her decision to do her work. She never listens to her either.

Claudine raises her eyebrow. She seems to notice how stupid that excuse sounds too.

"Saylor, what?" She asks, amused. "When did you start listening to her, Son?"

The blond looks to the side. Her mind is running a hundred miles per hour, trying to find an excuse. Still, she can't find one.

She takes in a deep breath, time to confess something she didn't want to have to. "...I was kind of hoping to join the others when they discuss their homework." Her confession is quiet, a blush tainting her cheeks.

Her friend frowns again. Claudine is quiet for a moment, seemingly thinking about Sonya's words. "Oh." She gasps, a big smile on her face. "I was right!"

Sonya blushes, her entire face turning a cherry red. "Shut up!"

Abruptly, Claudine jumps up. Her face painted by a giant smirk. "Sonya has a crush! Sonya has a crush!" She sings while running through the room.

The blond whimpers embarrassed, then the door is pushed open right into Claudine. Both the person opening the door, and Claudine make a surprised sound.

"Oh, fuck," the person is revealed to be Aurore. Her eyes wide as she enters the room. "You good, Claude?"

"Karma." Sonya smirks. Claudine glares at her before looking back at Rory.

"Yeah, I'm good," she says dismissively while rubbing her side. "I didn't know you were coming over, Rory. Could've warned us."

Rory hums and glances to the side. "I wasn't planning on it. I came back to the dorm and found Saylor and Eden all cozy-" She rolls her eyes. "-I didn't want to interrupt."

Sonya's face scrunches up in disgust. "Ew."

— masterlist ☆!!

[boopdeshmoop]

Can you all SHUT THE FUCK UP with the excuses?? Do you think you're yhr only nation full of overworked people, people suffering in poverty?

Ofc you would, bc you are all a bunch of self obsessed imperialist rats. You wouldn't even dare to write that disgusting level of apologist for US imperialism if you'd have any awareness ajour the shit that you all do to others.

Tge world would be a better place if yall used that second amendment right on yourselves

OK, didn't think anyone would even see that post let alone get offended enough to send something like this. And I must apologize, I don't know how to answer privately so if someone does see this and knows how, pls let me know!

As for what you've said, I think suicide is something not to make light of, so pls don't ask people to kill themselves. I think it shows a huge lack of empathy when people say that. And I only want to be mean on that part because suicide is something that I take very seriously, and I think everyone should too.

When I was making those "excuses" I explicitly tried not to single out the USA because poor education is something prevalent all over the world. And I think poor education is most prevalent in poor areas. Which means that most people don't have the recourses or time to educate themselves. They aren't really excuses when it's the reality that hundreds of people face all around the world. I just think it's unfair to ignore the issues a lot of under educated US Americans face.

And I'm sorry if this sounds like another "not ALL americans", but this isn't really a few bad apples issue, it's a systematic problem that is common all over the world. I don't understand why these issues can be ignored simply because it's in the USA. People in the USA are people too and deal with the same issues everyone else does. I'm sorry I've upset you, but I hope your day gets better.

[provendermalkin]

Zionists and Jewish fascists eagerly and hysterically cheering on genocide and using exactly the same rhetoric against Palestinians that were used against us throughout history makes me deeply ashamed of my heritage and I have thought about self-harming multiple times in the last week or two just due to the unbearable guilt and self-disgust of being associated with them. Because I am Jewish, the beliefs and behavior of Zionists are going to be attributed to and associated with me and my culture as a whole whether I like it or not. The mindset that we are a monolith universally culpable for the actions of the worst of us is so pervasive that even I struggle not to internalize it. My point isn't that I or people like me are "the real victims," just that Zionism is that toxic.

Israel is unquestionably wrong, and insisting they aren't is the height of willful delusion (as in a lie they've convinced themselves of, not as in the involuntary psychological symptom).

There is literally nothing, nothing at all, that Palestinians can do "right" under the present conditions that will make Israel stop abusing them to death at best and murdering them en masse the rest of the time. They're wrong if they stay because they're "illegally intruding," they're wrong if they leave because they're not fucking allowed to, they're wrong to hide in hospitals schools or mosques because they should have known there might possibly be Hamas nearby maybe (according to Israel), when they do believe evacuation orders they're gunned down or bombed on the road or they're allowed to reach the "safe zone" and then Israel bombs that, too. If they surrender it's a trap and they should be executed, if they resist they're a terrorist and should be executed.

So, what? They're malnourished and sick and impoverished and trapped and being carpet bombed at one of the highest rates in history, but somehow, even though Israel itself is struggling against Hamas, the ""good"" Palestinians are supposed to root them out from within, disarm them and hand them over to stop the slaughter and prove they don't deserve to be killed by the hundreds just in case one Hamas agent is nearby? When Israel sets out lawn chairs for Israelis to spectate and cheer on the bombing of buildings with children inside like a sporting event, or takes potshots with live ammunition at children playing soccer too close to the border of their open-air prison, it's "self defense," but when Palestinians see their genocide coming and resist by any means available, it's "terrorism"?

If we had had a well-armed and determined militant organization like Hamas around to fight for us during the Shoah, we would have used it, and we would have been right to do so. All other considerations become irrelevant in the face of absolute extinction and despair. Figuring out how to keep that extremist faction from enforcing bad conditions afterward is a secondary consideration in the face of the fact that if you don't act now and fight as hard as you can by any means available, neither you nor any of your people will be alive soon to HAVE that problem to fix.

[theaustinrockwell]

Whipped Cream and a Cherry on a Pile of Shit

As I try to get to the bottom of why men in the 7-10 range will date me but women either ignore me or latch on to me then push me away, I am discovering a few central themes on what I am doing wrong.

I have stated before that I worked on every area of my life, so that I was at least average or excellent in all of them (except for my student loans, which would be comical if THAT were THE thing to cause every single one of my dating problems). I have my own apartment, I'm college educated, am patient and kind, have worked at prestigious companies, have a motorcycle, etc.

Here's the problem: my lack of masculinity.

"Lack of masculinity? Wow, bro. Hot take. Groundbreaking." However, it's not the "lack of masculinity" in simple terms. I'm not trying to be a reductionist caveman. If it were so simple, then the solution would to just "be more macho." But that is not a satisfying answer for any of us. I am talking about becoming aware of the specific ways that masculinity is missing in my life and seeing why these holes are caused by fear and naivete.

When I date men, there is a certain drive about a masculine man that is magnetic. I also become well acquainted with having hundreds of men up my ass (not literally) message bombing me and how much of a turn off them getting emotional is. That has taught me how poorly I come off when I direct that same emotionality towards women.

When I'm doing MMA, I wimp out there too. Everybody else submits me and I tap a lot. It's like I'm barely even trying. While I am always working on the techniques and have gotten complimented since I started how great my focus on technique is, I still get beaten up most of the time. I don't win. I don't bring a winner's mentality to the gym. I am afraid and I'm hesitant to compete with other men. But when I see men who refuse to compete with other men, do I find that attractive myself? No. There are other guys at the gym who are technique focused, but they aren't that competitive. Or they're competitive at the gym, but life is submitting them and they show no drive outside of MMA. Super unattractive. That makes them see two dimensional and not masculine. To turn that perspective back on myself, I can see how I come off as unattractive. I am stifling my competitive drive. Why would a woman want to date a man without a competitive drive? So life can shit on us both? Nope. My job is to compete and pave the way for both of us.

When I think of the times that girls came on to me and I got timid and didn't make a move, I see why they then pushed me away explosively. I've slept with girls (literally cuddled the whole night and did nothing else) or took them out on the motorcycle until 3am when their boyfriends were at home, and DIDN'T make a DAMN move, even though looking back they made their own moves--I get why they chose other dudes over me or aggressively told me to fuck off. Between the vulnerability they felt in making a move and the societal pressures women face to not be too "slutty", once I appeared to not reciprocate physically (even though I wanted to but was too chickenshit), they hardcore ghosted me or flayed me alive and character assassinated me to the rest of our friend group. For them to go out on a limb and then not feel desired = "Well, FUCK Austin then. I never liked him. I never said, 'I love you.' He is disgusting." I get it. I get where my bitching out has hurt the people I've dated. My lack of masculinity in this area is unattractive. Women hate it. My fear of being called a creep leads me to do nothing sexual towards women, which in turn gets me called a creep, just for different reasons.

You know, when I show interest in a dude and he doesn't make a move, I wonder if he even likes me. Does he desire me? If we get into a relationship, will he make me feel attractive? If I were in a woman's shoes, I'd be asking, "Is he gay?" Of course, the answer for the dudes I date is, "Duh, they are gay." But the lack of physical attraction that I display towards women just does not feel good to them. Once again, my fear of overdoing it and being a creep leads me to act impotent and make girls feel like crap in a different way. When I picture a guy who is afraid to show sexual desire towards me, I imagine a hollow kind of man. Asexual people exist, but it's the fear that these guys have, the wanting to and yet stifling themselves. I have the same problem.

So why does this lack of masculinity hold me back and why was I unaware of it for so long? Going back to my laundry list of reasons why people "should" love me (career, apartment, whatever the fuck), I had all of these "things" that were embellishments upon my personality. I had a bunch of boxes checked, all of the ones that society said I should have checked as a man. It was a resume of material things and social signifiers. I would get mad for doing and having all of these things people said that they wanted in a man and yet still being alone. And again, it wasn't that I had fatal physical flaws. Women who were hot and ambitious and cool would latch on to me really quickly sometimes and make moves toward me. The attraction was there. What was missing was my masculinity, my fucking backbone. I treated all these boxes that I checked and things that I had like having them would allow me to be a meek little bitch, be afraid to live life, and be overly emotional. So either women would see that lack of masculinity straight away and go, "Gross." Or they would be aware that I'm an engineer and artist with a good sense of humor, see THAT as attractive, but then after repeated interactions, see how poor my confidence was and then lose attraction. The most explosive girl situations, come to think of it, were the ones in which I put up an uber masculine front at first (not stoic and silent, but a charismatic "fuck you" attitude), then I would unearth my softer side very quickly (along with being physically timid when the girls made moves on me), and the girls would cast me away, vote me off the damn island. Underneath the thin masculine facade, I was pretty weak and unsure of myself. I constantly sought reassurance. It was fucking pathetic. I thought by doing everything society asked me to do as a mature man that I was this wonderful delicious cake and that everybody was being so stupid for passing me by. I would rage over it. Everybody says they want a nice cake and how much they love icing and whipped cream on top. I have the best whipped cream. Why does nobody choose me? I now realize that all of these extra things I had were just superficial signals. I thought I had a real cake, but I was too focused on the whipped cream. Good whipped cream does not make up for a shitcake. My personality was shit because my core and my confidence were shit.

Most importantly, this is not me deciding to be someone other than myself. I'm not saying, "I am inherently not masculine in these areas and need to change myself to be loved." What I am saying is that I personally see the value in masculinity since I appreciate it myself when I see it in another man and that it's just a fact that the version of me that has a backbone and is not afraid is the better version of me. People reject the version of me that does not have a backbone, women especially.

I have more work to do on figuring out how masculinity and having a backbone plays out in my life, but it seems like the way to go. That is what is missing and what is causing people to push me away romantically and physically. I've been on both sides of this, and I get it. My big fear is that I'm going to fuck up by being too masculine and then be cancelled in 20 years, but thinking anybody gives enough of a fuck to cancel me is it's own form of narcissism. That's a conversation for a different time.

Don't focus on the whipped cream. Focus on being a good cake.

[spiderssnake]

Omega! Bakugou x Fem! Alpha! Reader

Chapter 1

"You know, my alpha hasn't been giving me any attention " Mina complained, playing with her horns. "It's annoying, he is always with the omegas"

*Alphas usually have two to three partners. They have a 'main' one that can decide whether or not the alpha can have another partner, and they are the alpha's priority

"Of course, what did you expect from an alpha, raccoon eyes?" Bakugou grumbled and took a big bite out of his food, some hot sauce left on his face

"I mean... he's not that bad, he still takes care of me, but he just makes it seem a little like it's a chore."

"That's cause you are just a second choice, he knows you aren't gonna leave him and takes advantage of you because you are stupid raccoon eyes."

"Dude, stop bringing her down, you don't even have a partner!" Sero frowned, risking his life once again as he approached the subject Bakugou hated.

He neither wanted, now could get an alpha due to his aggression. It didn't exactly deem him cute and breedable, which was the standard for omegas. Hell, some alphas even cowered at his sight, how could they dominate him when they couldn't bear to look him in the eye?

"I told you I don't need a shitty alpha! Look at how this genius is because of an idiot that all he did was bite her neck! You think someone like me has time to waste on that shit?!"

"Guys, I'm fine. I guess that we should break up, since he does care about me, I can just leave him with his thousand omegas. He doesn't want me just because I'm a beta."

"Or... you could just make him lose all his omegas and then leave him. If he can't handle even a little bit of attitude, is he even a real alpha?" You laughed, hanging your arms around her shoulders. Poor Mina, every alpha in a mile away could smell her distress pheromones.

"Oh, I like that! I'm gonna go start my revenge plan, see you guys later! Thanks (y/n)!" She laughed as she sprung up, gave you a hug and a kiss on the cheek, and ran off smiling.

Bakugou felt his chest vibrate, a low growl threatening to escape his mouth at the contact his pink-skinned friend made with you. The fact you watched her go with a smile set him off even more, but he knew that not even someone as dumb as his friends would try anything on you.

Plus, you wouldn't like raccoon eyes anyways. If you wanted someone easy, you would have one of the hundred idiots that stuck to you like glue as your omega.

He settled at only glaring at you, waiting for at least a glance. He wasn't even denying it at this point, but instead agreed with his wolf, his mind basically screaming for your attention.

You finally turned to look at them once Todoroki reached you, your eyes landing on Bakugou right away. You smiled at him and he tensed up and looked away, the tip of his ears a bit red.

Good thing his tail isn't out, he would be shaking it like a damn dog that saw his owner come home after work.

"The fuck you looking at, loser?" he muttered, hesitating on calling you a loser. He frowned even more once your giggles reached his ears, glaring at you. "You got a little something here." You laughed, pointing to the side of your lips.

He blushed and wiped his mouth with his sleeve, blushing as he turned to look at you again, only to see you already at another table with Todoroki, Midoriya trying to persuade you both into sitting with him and his friends.

You spotted him and send him a wink, giggling while he turned around before you turned to Deku again.He was kinda pissed at you for having so many people around you all the time.

He never even accepted any comfort alphas, disgusted by just the thought of someone else's scent other than you in his room and all over his nest, but here you were giving off smiles and winks everywhere.

*Comfort alphas are alpha students that get send to help omegas out in their heats; Some students do it for extra credits, while for others it's a form of detention.

Not that the alphas he was assigned would stay for too long anyway, he always managed to make them run off and beg for another omega.

So all he could do in his heats was just sit and think about you for an unhealthy amount of time; meaning, he constantly thought of every little speck of attention you had shown him. Especially that one time when you greeted him while passing by, despite having your usual flock of people swooning over you.

It was just a "Mornin' Omega!", but it still made him butterflies.

He was so proud internally that he didn't have to be all over you and fighting those idiots for you to notice him. It made him so special and giddy for the rest of the day that he almost smiled when his friends said good morning too.

Yeah, that wasn't much to feed on, but it wasn't the only thing that made your stare so embarrassing. It was mainly the fact that he would zone off in class and imagine you pulling him into a closet -or anywhere, really, even in front of the whole class and shoving your tongue in his mouth while pulling harshly his hair.

"You good Bakubro?"

"W-What? Yeah, fine, whatever" he scoffed and sat straight on his chair

"Why don't you just ask her to court you, man? She would be happy to." Denki shrugged and continued eating his food, half to tease Bakugou and half to actually try and give advice.

"Yeah, I'm sure she will be an awesome alpha. I considered asking her, but then I found out about you crushing on her and kinda backed off, but if you aren't gonna do anything, then--" Kiri started, but shut up with wide eyes once he heard a low, threatening growl.

Bakugou yelled, a hell of a lot and even barked sometimes, but he never growled. Especially as a threat, and especially to Kirishima, and one hundred percent not in public. "I-I'm not saying I'm interested in her, just saying that she's pretty popular, so unless you want someone else to take the chance, you--"

"She's my alpha," Bakugou growled quietly, not wanting to draw any attention while he glared at Kirishima, as if challenging him to say another word.

And he was challenging him. Daring him to say another word about you. You were his, end of story. And nobody would take you away from him.

"Imagine if they get together and she wants another omega, Kacchan is gonna go boom!" Denki laughed, trying to break the heavy atmosphere and save his red-haired friend's life.

"She won't get a fucking mate, forget about a second one. She is m--" Bakugou paused, realizing he just confirmed what his friends had been pestering him about since the very start of the school year.

"Damn, messing with him was fun while it lasted" Sero laughed, slowly backing off along with Denki who jumped over his seat and Kiri was slowly sliding out of the table.

"I hope it was worth your fucking lives extras!" Bakugou yelled as he took off behind them.

[bookofmirth]

Why are people having a gotcha moment with that argument that Elain is nothing like Jesminda (wild and carefree), which would mean that he would never love Elain but Vassa because she's wild like Jesminda?! Tf?

Rowan is nothing like Sam, yet Aelin fell in love with Rowan. Aelin had loved Sam more than anyone else, even Chaol!

Yrene is nothing like Celaena, yet Chaol, the guy who couldn't stop loving Celaena and couldn't just forget her, fell in love with Yrene and all feelings for Celaena vanished.

Tog is the proof that Sarah can do literally anything she wants, for example kill the ship that has been there for like 3 books for a entirely new ship, yet the other side chose to be blind about it and still scream "4 books of build up". Or the fact that we got a bonus chapter entirely from Chaol's POV and the next book was his, yet they still try to convience anyone that Azriel's bonus chapter is not relevant. Or Rowan training Aelin (some sort of teacher- student thing) and Rowaelin is now endgame, yet the other side believe that since Azriel trains Gwyn, it's disgusting because it's like a teacher- student thing, even tho it's not. Then the fact that Rowaelin wanted to literally kill each other, yet the other side cries that Elucien can't happen cause Elain ignored Lucien + the canon fact that Rowan told Aelin straight in her face that they aren't friends, yet the other side laugh at Gwynriels for Azriel saying that he wouldn't so far as to call Gwyn a friend.

Why do they pretend like Tog doesn't exist?!

(It all may be in ToG, but many things in acotar are ignored by the other side as well. Is it because these things don't back up El/riel?)

Honestly, this is sooooo fucking funny to me, because Elain being nothing like Jesminda is literally what sjm said about Elain, and why she said that she paired Elain and Lucien as mates, and why they would be able to heal and grow together.

Let's take a journey back, shall we? To what sjm said about Elain and Lucien:

And I realized that Elain was kinda the person both Lucien AND I didn’t see coming - and without getting too spoilery, there was actually a great deal of tension, growth, and healing to be found for both of them (together).

That's not a gotcha, that's pointing out a detail in acowar that corroborates Sarah's statement about why elucien are perfect mates. 🙂

They've got the tension now. She fucking told us it would happen. Kinda like she had the tension between rowaelin, and feysand, and nessian, and lysaedion (even though personally I'm 🤢about that one) and elorcan, and etc. That's tension that Eron and Aarica have never experienced for a second.

Elain and Lucien have a hundred and one reasons why their personalities fit together. Like you said, all of her couples complement each other, and that's pretty dang normal. Sometimes opposites can attract, but generally she writes complementary ships. It's why she retconned Lucien to being the heir of the Day Court - that fits Elain's personality and what she needs. I would love an explanation as to why she would do that, if it wasn't for elucien.

yet the other side believe that since Azriel trains Gwyn, it's disgusting because it's like a teacher- student thing, even tho it's not

This is one of the dumbest fucking takes I've read in this fandom, ngl. I can't even mince words about it. Az is in no way an authority figure over Gwyn. He just isn't. If anything, she has all of the social capital because she is High Fae - he's Illyrian. Which one is more highly regarded in that world? (We don't need to argue about why that's not great, but it is a canon fact.) And don't get me freaking started on the fact that she is more than a survivor of her assault, yet for some reason that one moment is supposed to define her entire damn life and every single relationship, platonic or romantic, from that moment on. I've explained their so-called "uneven power dynamic" so many ways, but it's just like most other points in this fandom. Some people just refuse to listen, and at this point I'm ready with my bucket of popcorn and the five boxes of seltzer water I accidentally ordered this afternoon.

[batarangsoundsdumb]

guess fucking what? my inbox is so fucking full right now i'm unloading all of this shit in one post.

For the 11th gotham memes: gothamites react to bruce being jacked in a tiktok he made with kids, like super yoked, ripped as hell

fucking hilarious thanks. i think i did it in one meme post, but i genuinely don't remember which one

i dunno which of the batfam would do this but one time i was sleeping over at a friends house and ended up on the floor bc the bed was so very small and i just stayed there because the rug was soft

that's a drunk jason move i don't know what to tell you

tim and jason are "i listen to pop punk" solidarity. whenever jason highjacks the batmobile theyll go on long ass car rides blaring mcr and paramore and then never talk about it again

as they should!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tim: no jason it's my turn using the aux cord i gotta put on my jams jason: don't you dare put on weird shit tim: don't worry, you're gonna love this *plays fearless (taylor's version)

hear me out hear me out, red hood stans 🤝 nightwing stans t h i g h s

holy shit yes.

SNL au: Bruce breaks character when pretending to superman and says something like "I'm not superman! You've seen his gps!! It's from 2001!!!" @sabeanybabe

superman flies past the snl building the next day just to say 'actually it's from 2005, i'm not a heathen'

does your back hurt from carrying the batfam fandom

it hurts more from the exotic rock collection i keep in my backpack, but thanks for the concern.

I love your posts by why would you always leave the best parts in the tags?

as a treat for the people that check the tags ;) (and also because i'm committed to the short post aesthetic)

somehow your playlist was everything i never knew i needed. i mean it. this is my new favorite playlist.

and don't you dare get a new favourite playlist!

babe ur stoner tim playlist is exactly too perfect, earth is literally blessed by ur existence

babe thanks so much! i love my stoner tim playlist because it's just my usual playlist but people think it's an artistic choice that i put taylor swift and britney spears in there, when it's just what i unironically like listening to

JANDKSKDK BILLY RAY CYRUS ON THE STONER TIM PLAYLIST I LOVE IT IT

again it's not even an ironic choice, i know every single word and i genuinely like the song

The last chapter of Fundamentals of Casework has me crying at work. Thanks I love it @dudelookitsalesbian

oh babe, i'm sorry, but also, not sorry i love chapter 4 so much it's my lovechild with the 'mental illness' tag

soooo....stumbled on your tumblr by some stroke of fate??? read your DC fanfic first. which is PHENOMENAL btw. then found all the batmemes; the funniest thing EVER bc everyone forgets about regular old gothamites. kept scrolling and your blog pops up as recommended. clicked on the ao3 for shits and giggles and waddaya know?!?!? it's YOU!!! you're LEGEND!!!! ever seen that meme? it's a video of a cat that got into a baseball field and the two announcers get really invested in his escape attempt and start giving a play by play of the cat instead of the game. memeable moment: "GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!"

i seriously think about this ask every single day and it's so fucking funny to me that i've never seen the meme you're referencing, but i still find myself going 'GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!' whenever i see something funny. but wow i'm glad you liked this steaming pile of garbage

Fav dc character overall? And fav batfamily character?

don't ask me to pick between the loves of my life, but i can tell you i've cried about every single batfamily member and also wally west (my beloved)

What's your opinion on fans having a problem with batfam being "too big"? And some even claim that batfam is just "Bruce Alfred Dick Damian" and the rest of them are just "friends and allies" (source: reddit) Personally, I like batfam because of this reason but idk

stupid. a family can never be too big. i'm not that big a fan of like huge batfam stuff with everybody from every single universe, because as much as it's funny for bruce to have like 30 kids, it just feels a little too OOC for me.

This is the best tag I've seen involving the batfam, thanks for thinking of it

This is canon now @nctxrejects

lmao yeah i think at that point alfred has had to sit through like at least a dozen coming out talks and just has a pride flag collection in the attic that he pulls out whenever a kid comes out

idk why batfam hits different as compared to any other superhero family

bc it's found family and usually the other superhero families are almost all genetically related in one way or another

I don't know if you watch the umbrella academy but I saw your last post about batcest and saw the similarities. But the thing is (although I think it's weird) in TUA, they addressed it by saying "they were raised as weapons, not siblings" or something along those lines, which is simply not the case with batfam.

yeah i watched tua but i also thought it was ridiculous and they still treated each other as siblings so i didn't like the luthor/allison thing, and am glad they stopped doing that shit bc it fucking sucked.

Hot take: Batcest shippers are the same people who believe adopted siblings are not actual siblings

smoking hot take: batcest shippers are the people who watch 'my sister got stuck in the washing machine' porn

Duke was adopted by Bruce?

not technically no, but do i, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb, look like i care?

True story but I had to change my freaking name because it used to be "Damien" and most people would go "OH LIKE DAMIAN WAYNE" like please I'm just tryna live

true story, but i don't actually think of damian when i hear the name damian, literally the first thing that pops up is damian darkh like bruh what?

apparently dc comics company supported comic stores by giving out new titles and stuff during the beginning of the pandemic to help them run and I just think that's wholesome

ah yeah that's so fucking cool, still don't like dc, the company, because this world is a capitalist hellhole and we're all owned by warner brothers or disney with no in between.

ayo looking at tumblr head canons and finding out bruce is actually a terrible father is a punch in the gut

lmao yes, in like 50% of comics bruce is a terrible father and it gives me whiplash

oooh I just saw the jason todd vs winter soldier post and the real question is: batman vs iron man

while iron man has like hundreds of cases of armor, batman could throw out an emp and have the guy dropping out of the sky in 2 seconds.

dickfast = fastdick = quickdick = quickie

magnum hot take

hey bata(?) just thought I'd let you know I have copied the obnoxious emoji and Billy Ray post for use on simping men going forth

thank you 😘🌷 (@spacebarsidecar)

why would you do that to your followers???? i get why i did it, but why would you???

what is scarecrow made the nightwing funko pop himself, like those diy-ers that paint over other ones

oh god no, horrible take, horrible take, that's a disgusting thought oh no

I see your HC that Bruce and Oliver fucked and raise you this: Dick and Roy ALSO fucked

yes they did and it was a horrible moment for jason to find out dick has fucked both of his best friends

"at this rate bruce adds like 1 child to his family every decade or so" Duke is introduced in 2013, Damian as Damian, not as an unnamed child, in 2006. And he is already 14 years old, Robins rarely remain Robins after 16 😬 It looks like a new Robin and Batkid will appear in a couple of years

i mean i can't wait? but somebody will probably die first tho, we're due for another major character death. my money's on either cass or duke this time.

BRO you're so right all of your Bruce's ex headcanons are amazing but they aren't ships, that's kinda wild. Like I don't want any peeks into how their relationship was I just want to see everyone make fun of them

lmao YES it's just i love bruce being a slut, like good for him.

I am in love with your posts your honour thank you

omg thanks are we like,, gonna kiss now?

The justice league needs to have a meeting to discuss how many of their members/partners have slept with bruce. Because through a combination of cannon & fannon (if DC wasn’t homophobic) we have AT LEAST: 1) clark 2) lois 3) oliver 4) dinah 5) john

Thats not counting villains or random civilians @dudelookitsalesbian

yes yes yes, they'll have a yearly meeting about how many of their collective exes could be out for revenge and batman's list just keeps getting longer.

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

and what about it?

when steph's fighting livewire and she zaps her with lighting and nothing happens and then they both just. stand there awkwardly for a second and talk. yeah i couldn't stop laughing at that batgirl steph is the BEST

oh yeah that was fucking hilarious and i think it would be so cool and sexy of dc to give steph a little comic series,,, as a treat

Hi I absolutely adore all of yours "Bruce and Oliver very badly pretending they didn't fuck each other" memes

lmao i do too

I need you to know that “Bruce Wayne had frosted tips” is one of my favorite Bruce takes of all time it’s so galaxy brained. you’re right and you should say it

he also painted his hair blonde once when he was travelling and in conclusion, this is why he's being blackmailed by the gotham gazette.

you know my thing about gordon being branded as the only good cop in gotham is its a load of shit like arguably he's a good person and not working to screw people over or anything but the fact that he also works w. batman makes him a shit cop. like yea batman is better than the mob but its still illegal its still an abuse of power he just not making bank

babe, all cops are bad cops. (but yeah youre absolutely right, working with vigilantes makes you a shit cop, but also working against vigilantes just makes you an asshole cop yanno?)

ruh roh i think i’m about to add “so not yeehaw” every time i don’t like something

that's a very good vocabulary upgrade

somehow i feel like steph already knew. like babs obviously knew but i feel like bruce got high/drunk in front of steph and started telling his boarding school stories and steph was just like “oh you fucked up i’m never gonna forget this”

steph and bruce have weird uncle/rebellious niece dynamic and they just hang out sometimes and bruce will be like 'i once broke my arm when i tripped over a hedge when i was drunk so oliver drove me to the hospital on an electric scooter' and steph will just have to sit there with that knowledge in her head.

Hello I just wanted to tell you you are So right in all your steph opinions bc she is, in fact amazing and I think that's very sexy of you. Ps. Your Bruce/Oliver fic is hilarious

babe, thank you so much and yes steph is amazing and i love her and she deserves the world and she's the best member of the batfam hands down. also thanks

In Supersons we see a couple of kids that are implied to be Damian and Jon's children and the boy has laser eyes and can fly, so I asume he's not adopted. The girl, who calls Bruce grandpa, can also fly, btw. So it's canon (probably by accident) that Jon can have kids and he must have married one of Bruce's kids. (I'm hoping for Damian, mostly because any other of his children would be waaaaaaaaaaaaay too old.) @artemisa97

lmao that was probably an accident seeing as jon is a 17 year old superhero in the year 3000 (by the jonas brothers)

You know, I'm a die hard fan of your memes, but I gotta say one thing: if Gothamites actually took gas mask everywhere with them, then the Scarecrow would just be a weird dude in a weird costume, and not a villain oh so scary. DC really should just takes notes from you.

bold of you to assume there's no gothamite anti-maskers

How does it feel being the funniest person on this app?

horrible, next question.

I can't listen to Green Day or Billy Joel without thinking of your post about how Bruce got arrested at a Billy Joel concert @nightwings-kid

yeah that's your mistake, i on the other hand can't enjoy billy joel without thinking about the glee rendition of 'uptown girl'

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

superman: so what do you do in your free time? batman, thinking about the superman fanfiction he's writing on the batcomputer: i have no free time

bruce and oliver be like boyfriends to co-workers 401k (do the justice leagues get 401ks??? not that bruce and ollie would need them, but-)

lmao yes just 400 thousand words of bruce realising 'oh dip oliver is such a fucking dumbass' (also i don't know what a 401 k is but i assume they don't?)

Gothamites would totally boo superman as he saves Gotham while batman is out. @meenje

he's like 'okay think about that next time you want to be saved from an alien octopus'

I just took long break from dc comics and I come back to see ric grayson ??

i think it's very cool and sexy of dc to see dick and just think 'you know what? let's just give him a traumatic brain injury' and then didn't develop his character in any real way

SPEAKING OF RIC GRAYSON, gothamites making confused memes out of ric grayson is much needed

'dick grayson is my taxi driver? can anyone explain what the fuck happened he looks like an italian plumber?'

i hate to say it but batfam are def "marvel characters" in that sense they are characters who are human but become superheroes unlike most dc characters who are gods trying to be human maybe this is why I like batfam

fair enough