#there's tons more parallels i didn't even touch on here

[bugsbenefit]

ST is much more inspired by Stephen King than we tend to acknowledge and i mean MUCH more

Warning: Major spoilers for Firestarter by Stephen King (also Carrie, IT and the Talisman but only teeny tiny one's)

some parallels on the show get talked about a lot, especially with how the writers are very vocal about them/them getting verbally mentioned in the show:

IT, by Stephen King, for example, gets constantly referenced in ST. it's an aesthetic inspiration: small town, townsfolk doesn't know about the HorrorsTM, kids riding around on bikes taking it into their own hands etc. they also took massive inspiration for Vecna and his visions -> classic Pennywise move. but even more specific things, like the balloons at the snowball exploding in blood, or the painting plot of receiving a love confession that gets attributed to the wrong person, are IT plot points

also easy to catch is, the Talisman, by Stephen King, since it gets read out loud by the end of s4. it will for sure somehow play into s5. even just with it's main premise being two worlds that are identical mirrors of each other and having to defeat the evil on the other side to save your own

those two parallels are obvious. but as someone who read Way too much Stephen King growing up, those two are not the only two works that were referenced heavily in the writer's room

for example: Carrie has crazy parallels to ST, especially El and Henry and the concept of powers as a whole. a really quick rundown of themes that get reflected in ST or even incorporated to some degree: (short, because i'll make an actual in depth post on this when i finally find the time to reread it properly)

the religious imagery and fanatic religious followers, the way powers seem to work to begin with (with negative vs. positive emotion as their source playing a big role), the way people respond to the powers (fear, attributing them to a demonic source, isolation as both punishment And a breaking point for Carrie) her relationship with her mother (an abusive parent), bullying tying into powers, and of course, Carrie's main rampage the book is famous

BUT. what i think is one of the biggest parallels on the show for how obvious it is -> the lab and El as a whole are 1000% inspired by Firestarter. i'm so serious it's not even a small reference. it's literally the exact same in large parts

the parallels of ST to Firestarter are absolutely Insane so to show how OH it is, here's the general plot summary of Firestarter (spoilers):

a couple takes part in an experiment while in college because they need the money. (can't remember if it was MKultra explicitly or just implied but yeah, it's MKultra) as a side effect of the substances and hallucinogenics (LSD) they were given the mother develops minor telekinetic powers and the dad has some form of mind persuasion abilities afterwards. they go home with the money, however, get continuously observed by the organization to monitor any additional effects but then they have a daughter who has Big psychic powers because of the tests done on them. the organization who did the original experiment finds out and tries to take the girl. (the mom dies as the husband and child manage to flee) long story short, after being on the run for a while, the daughter gets taken by the men and locked up in a lab facility. where she's confined to a room, has guards that keep her from leaving, and has to participate in "tests" where scientists try to figure her powers out. especially intense though is the director of the organization, who becomes obsessed with her and her powers while at the lab, the man, who was hired to kidnap her in the first place, now takes interest in her and assumes the identity of a worker in the facility, a janitor, to appear more harmless and get access to her. he manages to gain her trust with this disguise and convinces her to actually demonstrate her powers, which have become incredibly powerful and destructive after some HorrorsTM she witnessed prior later she manages to escape the facility when her dad shows up to get her back. however the "janitor" claiming to be her friend kills her father which causes her to express powers on a level never seen before with which she kills both the "janitor" in disguise and the obsessed organization leader (while also having almost everyone present in the building die as a result of her exploding it and any military vehicle approaching as she escapes) PS: she and her dad hide out from the organization in an old abandoned cabin of his in the woods for an extended period of time PSS: the book ends with her going to a newspaper and planning to reveal what has been going on at the lab to blow their cover and get them to finally stop hunting her down

it's LITERALLY THE LAB. IT IS. it's one of THE most obvious parallels in ST imo and i'm shocked i've never seen Anyone bring it up (also need to reread the book soon and make a longer post about it because there's SO much there) but this is literally the conception and later downfall of the lab in s1-2. and now with s4 it even covers some of the general conditions there with the tests and guards and Henry and. just. hhh. it's the SAME. Brenner, Henry, Hopper, Terry, and El are all in this book

also fun fact: the book is called Firestarter bc the girl is able to, duh, start fires. but it later turns out that her powers actually Aren't just pyrokinesis. she has general powers (very similar to Carrie). the fires only happen because of the insane energy levels she's able to channel, they're just the Side product. she can also just use normal telekinesis -> even robs an airport coin telephone at one point (El stealing is fun Hopper and Will let's commit fraud Byers would be proud of her)

Stephen King books like IT and Carrie seem like obvious inspirations for some elements of ST. but Firestarter especially is such an obvious inspiration and for Sure the blueprint of Hawkins lab it's not even funny. Stephen King in general seems to be a BIG influence on ST as a whole which makes sense with the way the Duffers talked about him before...

but i'm so serious, when i say Stephen King is probably the place where you'll consistently find The Most ST references and spoilers for future plot points, i MEAN it

[miiracleboys]

shirabu or kogane for the character bingo :0000

hi sou i'm so sorry this took 10000 years to answer

shirabu

i touched on my thoughts about him here!

checked off:

wasted potential: shirabu doesn't have an exceptionally substantial backstory, but it's more than we get from other characters and he definitely stands out from the rest of the cast with the little details, like how he came to shiratorizawa for ushijima the same way that akaashi came to fukuroudani because of bokuto, or how he doesn't attend on a sports scholarship, or how his grades and diligence could have landed him in a much more academically rigorous school but chose shiratorizawa. but then we barely see him outside of the match against karasuno and, briefly, during the ball boy arc, and those details aren't mentioned again! i understand that, pacing-wise, it probably wouldn't have worked and that this is the case for many haikyuu characters, but there are Tons of questions that those details bring up.

if they were real i would be afraid of them: i would not be able to handle the force of his disapproval. i would simply shrivel up and die. props to goshiki for being able to withstand it.

they're deeper than they seem: ououghgough me when literary devices. i know i've said this about other characters but the setters are all so cool because of how they contrast and draw parallels to one another. shirabu vs semi and shirabu vs kageyama are especially interesting, but his relationship with ushijima is cool too, because he adapts. he's a little bit of a pain in the ass when he wants to be, but it's so neat to me that he has a middle ground between "supporting the ace" and "demanding the ace's 110%", and he can effortlessly combine the two rather than switching between them. this fluidity is partially what got him a spot as a starter but his relationship with goshiki and ushijima's advice about it also draws attention to how he can be rooted in his own views and how that can trip him up.

they got done DIRTY by fans: fanon!shirabu is either invisible or a tsundere and it makes me throw up in my mouth a little.

didn't get enough screen time: i would pay furudate real money to see shiratorizawa under his captaincy or him hanging out with the team, pre- and post-timeskip.

i don't really have much to say about them: i like him and i think he's interesting, but i don't talk about him as much. i simply think he's neat.

why do they look like that: i will forever think his hair is stupid. sorry fhjdsnfd

they work better as a part of a dynamic: i might've said this before but as a part of a team and especially as a setter, his relationships are a big chunk of what makes him fascinating to me.

koganegawa under the cut! this got much longer than i expected.

koganegawa

checked off:

they are soooooo cool looking: not necessarily cool but his >:3 face makes me want to put him in my pocket. cannot honestly say the same about his hair though.

they're deeper than they seem: he's a sweetheart and sometimes he doesn't always have a ton of common sense but his passion, drive, and willingness to learn radiates from him and makes him similar to hinata and goshiki. plus all this and his unfailing friendliness and earnestness helps him get along with any team and make friends (and rivals, and friendly rivals), which, in turn, makes it much easier for him to learn and grow. it's absolutely no surprise that he went pro.

didn't get enough screen time: i would never turn down an opportunity to See Him but i'd love to see his growth through his time at datekou and his time on the sendai frogs. emphasis on the latter, even if only because i think it'd be funny. also, i'd like to have seen the karasuno vs datekou match and the ensuing nationals matches where they landed TOP EIGHT IN THE NATION because i think about that a lot.

i want to carry them in a handbag like a tiny dog: for comfort. he gives off the energy of a golden retriever and i love him very much.

i'm mentally ill about them: GROWTH. both in terms of DISCIPLINE and SKILL. and he has so many FRIENDS. i'm literally so proud of him.

they've never done anything wrong in their life: being tough for futakuchi to wrangle is a good thing. it keeps him on his toes!

[sophsun1]

When Justin tells Brian that him cheating with Ethan was about more than sex and that Ethan loves him, you can see Brian stop dead in his tracks for a split second. Even though he has his hangups abt love, at that point it had been shown that he does love Justin (the silent admission w/ Debbie, the rules, helping Justin recover and paying his tuition) so hearing Justin basically say this guy I just met loves me more than you ever could must've hurt. And ofc instead of verbalizing his feelings (which is what Justin needed to hear in that moment) and fighting for their relationship, Brian goes into defence mode and pushes him away. Then Justin asks him would he care if he were to leave and Brian doesn't answer this directly, again giving him an ultimatum. But this eventually gets answered at the start of s3 when we're shown how much of a mess Brian is with Justin gone, and honestly any time Justin leaves. The man cannot function without him and yet he would rather sabotage his own happiness. If you can't tell I'm on their first breakup era on my rewatch so I have a ton of feelings right now lmao

Hey anon!

Yesss to everything you said!

God I love those moments and how they feed into season 3 and all it's angsty glory I absolutely live for that era. Brian freezing the moment Justin says "he loves me" and then literally grabbing his face and having the most INTENSE eye contact/forehead touch when he asks him if he cares whether he leaves or not!!!! The heart stopping tension of yelling through the screen JUST SAY YES YOU IDIOT. I'm here for it all. Not to mention the Oscar winning scene of Justin returning in the night and Brian pulling back the covers and just holding him whilst they're both having silent breakdowns and I'm sobbing over it all.

Some breakup eras you just can't watch because they're so painful or badly written but with this one I honestly love rewatching it. It probably helps that I didn't see it live but had the magic of knowing that they got back together lol and that the third wheel in this relationship ie Ethan is such a non threat. He makes me laugh and the only reason I haven't watched his and Justin's scenes is because I die of cringe sorry not sorry :))

Brian's love for Justin is so strong that even though it kills him they're not together he never tries to force him to come back or guilt trip him in any way. He actually ends up helping both him and Ethan out lol I mean hello, who would do that?!! But it's a testament to what a kind heart he actually has. To us it's as simple as just tell him you love him like Lindsey advises him to but deep down he fears that no one could actually love him like that and ultimately they'll always leave. Ugh Brian's characterisation makes me weep there's so many layers to it. Brian being the most insecure yet owardly confident person ever how I love and relate to him <3

One of my favourite things about his story arc is how every moment of change or growth from him across the show can be tied back to that iconic I don't believe in love speech from 1x02. And when he finds himself in situations where it goes against his belief of love being for fools and how it'll hurt you we see he will get it wrong or self sabotage because of his fears or not knowing how to handle it. I seriously need to make a gifset someday of those parallels.

[oleanderblume]

I watched all of heartstopper today and I have THOUGHTS

Don't worry they are good thoughts.

One of my absolute *least* favorite things in entertainment media is the use of current, and predominantly online terms.

Especially when it comes to more left leaning politics. Because it comes off incredibly pedantic and pandering and insincere. Like, there was this cute show I was totally into up until it started using terms in that incredibly forced and insincere way, where I turned it off and simply haven't touched it again.

I'm really picky about this shit because I'm one of those fuckers that likes the characters to be characters before they are *insert token check box here* and that particular form of "inclusivity" just reads as tone deaf because I don't know a single person who would *out loud and in regards to themselves* use that type of language.

And like, that's generally a really big issue with lgbt+ fiction in media, because for some reason production companies and directors think that we like our identities being entirely linked to politics :/

Heartstopper was a breath fresh fucking air for me (I legit almost cried like 4 times watching it) because all the characters had incredibly believable dialog and reactions and even little inside jokes that are common within the community to the point that if you are *in* the lgbt+ community, you'd get it, and if you aren't, it's something small enough, you'd not even notice.

They felt like characters before they felt like stereotypical, tokenized identities, which was really nice. It felt like a *romance* before a story about sexuality, and the romance was incredibly well done 👏

And holy FUCK I love how they handled Elle. Actually, I loved how they handled every character's gender and sexuality, because it wasn't cheap. It was organic.

They trusted the audience to put two and two together about Elle being trans before finally dropping the proverbial bomb in I think like, the second to last episode??? Idk for sure but I *loved* it.

Maybe because I do the exact same thing with my trans character in Caring for Your Clown. Cause Oliver isn't *officially* revealed as trans until the mid point, but there are tons of hints throughout the text leading up to that point and I've not seen that anywhere else except for Heartstopper. (Granted the only other example i can think of is the trash fire that was high guardian spice trying to explain transgender people XD)

Like, Elle's treatment in the story is basically why I'm ranting about the show right now because I loved it so much. Granted, I kind of wished she had more screen time, but I'm automatically biased to love literally any trans rep so....that aside, Elle's character specifically was a really beautiful take on that representation.

I think though, the thing that really made this show so wonderful for me was how every POV character (with exceptions of Isaac cause he sort of doesn't exist) has incredibly relatable and realistic thoughts, reactions and above all else, STRUGGLES that are accurately portrayed.

Not over emphasized, or made into a caricature. It's genuine nuance to them in their individual arcs.

Case in point: Elle's crush on Tao being largely inhibited by her fear (or at least me perception of her fear) that Tao would never be interested in her *because* she is trans. Cause you best be damned if I didn't catch that.

It's framed in a "Don't want to ruin the friendship" sort of way, but you cannot reasonably convince me that she wouldn't be terrified of pursuing a relationship with him because he is straight, and how that commonly reflects the idea that straight people won't ever be into trans people on the basis of their AGAB.

Like I'm sorry. You can't tell me I'm wrong here.

(This is also a parallel in my books, cause my MC has feelings for another and he actively dismisses them because he thinks that that person doesn't want him as a *boy*— I mean, there's also like a ton of other reasons, but that's one of them)

Or the entire arc with Charlie being feeling as though he is a burden to Nick because of his past relationship. Or the fact that it is so *evident* that Nick immediately understands that his fear of being ostracized and asking Charlie to do the exact same thing he did with Ben is hurtful.

Also HOLY FUCK actual God damned bisexual representation???? Like a MAIN CHARACTER being openly, decidedly bisexual? I love that. Because it's so often the "I don't like lables" sexuality. I fucking loved it when Nick came to that conclusion.

Basically, as an author, and avid lover of storytelling...heartstopper is really good and I highly recommend it if you want to see genuine and nuanced portrayal of LGBT+ romance.

And I really hope I get more fucking Elle and Tao because I love every scene with them so much I need my girl to be happy.

[moonlight-prose]

PARALLEL HEARTS | PETER CUBED

a/n: part two if FINALLY here. i think i'm more in love with andrew garfield now than i was when the movies came out. i wasn't sure where i wanted this fic to go. thankfully my brain has decided to work again. i definitely don't think this is good writing, but i don't want to rewrite it. ignore the mistakes.

SPIDER-MAN NO WAY HOME SPOILERS AHEAD

summary: spider-man's accomplice should have a sweeter ring to it and yet there you are. stuck in the middle of a mess you didn't make.

word count: 5k+

pairing: peter parker x fem!reader (not tom)

warnings: not explicit, cussing, minor angst, TONS of fluff, and kissing.

previous chapter | next chapter

Waking up to find a missing Spider-Man from your living room isn’t how you planned your day would start.

Although handling a superhero situation surely would have made your day begin with a bang and it seemed this was just how to kick it off. Late into the night you had fallen asleep at the table, your face pressed against a textbook as Peter organized the pile of paper beside you. He figured it was the least he could do since you put him up for the night.

After your eyes shut and your brain turned off, you couldn’t remember anything. Like how you ended up in your bedroom, under your covers with the pillow from the couch laying beside you. Some small part of you recalled the sensation of being moved from one room to the other. A voice murmuring to you that it was okay. Everything would be okay.

You assumed it to be Peter which made things even worse. He must have left before you had the chance to wake up, which meant you wouldn’t be able to wish him well on his journey home. If you had the resources - or even the power - you would assist him. Yet all you held in the palm of your hand was a dead phone and a folded up piece of paper that was taped on top of it.

“Dammit,” you sighed, rubbing the sleep out of yours while you simultaneously fought the urge to pass out for a few more hours.

Getting up felt harder than before, but with a disgruntled groan you managed to actually get your feet to touch the cold hardwood floor. If he was gone that meant you didn’t have to involve yourself in this problem any more than you already had done. Helping him for one night would be good enough. Except the small pit in your stomach that began to fester wracked you with guilt at the knowledge that he was now on his own.

“No,” you muttered, running your hand over your face. “I can’t do this.”

You shouldn’t do this.

Stumbling into the kitchen you didn’t notice that your recently shattered window had been put back together. Small pieces of webbing holding the broken glass together. It wasn’t until you were brewing your coffee and searching your rather empty fridge for some food did you realize the apartment was warm. There wasn’t a draft anymore. Glancing behind you, the sight of the window made you smile. A rarity before you had some caffeine in your system, but how could you not.

When Spider-Man himself had tried to help in any way he knew how.

You hummed, the faint scent of your coffee slowly beginning to rouse you from the haze you were trapped in. The books from last night were piled neatly in the center of the table, a small note stuck to the spines.

Thank you for everything.

-Peter^2

“You’re welcome,” you whispered, laughing silently at the way he signed off. In a way it was true. He was the second Peter of this world and while that seemed like a strange concept last night, it felt oddly comforting now. Whatever he was going through…he wasn’t alone. There was another Spider-Man out there ready to help him, even if that Spider-Man was a kid in many ways.

Too immersed in staring at the note in your hands you didn’t hear the window slide open gently. A now properly dressed Peter Parker climbing in balancing several things at once in his hand. It was the coffee being placed in front of you that had you jumping backwards and losing grip of your mug.

“Shit!” he said, the still unfamiliar sounding thwip hitting your ears right after.

“Do you do that a lot?” you shouted, clutching your hand over your chest in the hopes of slowing down your now racing heart. That was the second time he had scared the ever living fuck out of you and something told you it wouldn’t be the last.

He huffed out a laugh, setting the mug down gently. “I’m too quiet for my own good sometimes.”

“You think?”

“I didn’t mean to scare you.” He offered you the bag he was carrying of something that smelled eerily like your favorite types of bagels.

“You left,” you said outright. Some part of you knew that you should have let it go. So what if he left without saying goodbye? He wasn’t yours to keep. Well…the version of you now in this universe didn’t have a hold over Peter.

He looked down, glancing at the mug you had nearly dropped. “I did.”

“And now you’re back?”

He nodded. “I thought I could leave you out of this - I wanted to leave you out of it.”

“But…”

“But you’re the only one who so far hasn’t looked at me like I don’t belong here.” Sighing, he pulled out the chair from last night and took a seat. Leaning against the table. “I thought maybe the other me - Peter - could help, but he’s just a kid.”

“He is a kid. I thought…it would be better if you left and never came back. Except then the guilt set in,” you said, sitting beside him. “Which I never like to deal with. So I’m at your service Parker. With whatever you need.”

Briefly glancing down at the coffee he was holding, he smiled. “You know you’re a lot like the you of my universe.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” he said softly, catching your eyes as you fought to bite back the smile that threatened to show. He would only be here for a minuscule amount of time. Certainly not enough to actually catch any feelings for you whatsoever, so you shouldn’t be doing that either.

Focusing on the problem at hand would be your only priority.

“So, what do we have to do to get you home?” you asked, biting into the bagel and feeling some of the coffee settle into your system. One day – when all of this was over – you’d finally come to terms with the fact that you were one of the people who was lucky enough to interact with someone from an alternate universe.

The notion alone left you speechless. You were speaking to someone who lived in a different universe.

“I need to find the source of where it happened and why.” Pulling the small notepad the both of you had started last night, he began to jot down things he needed. What he remembered about being pulled into this universe. “If we can somehow make the collision happen again-”

“We can get you home?”

“It’s a long shot, but it might be easier than we think.”

The ding of your phone turning on after being plugged in for a bit let you know that a single voicemail was still in your inbox. You thought that seemed a bit strange, until you recalled what occurred yesterday. Calling Stephen, letting him know what was going on. It was – like Peter said – a long shot, but it was worth trying. He might know more than either of you at the moment. Who were you kidding, he probably knew about everything that was happening.

“Hang on.” Playing the message, you heard a high pitched noise in the background.

“Hey smarties it’s Stephen.” – you scoffed at the old nickname – “I don’t know if it’s appropriate to call you that anymore, but I got your message. And yes. I know what you’re talking about. Peter is with me currently so you must be talking about another Peter. Which if you are, then that complicates things here. If you can come to 177A Bleecker Street, I’ll explain as much as I can.”

A singular beep followed, letting you know that this was the only message he had left you. 177A Bleecker Street. You’d never actually been there before. Seeing it on the news was one thing, but seeing it up close in person was another thing entirely. Scribbling down the address on a post-it note you handed it to Peter before getting up to find something else to eat for breakfast.

“Do you eat a lot?”

What kind of question was that?

“I think…”

“No I meant-” Sighing, you attempted to reiterate what you meant in a different way. “How much breakfast am I making? Does your metabolism burn through food faster than the average human or am I good with just making a batch of pancakes and some eggs?”

“The pancakes and eggs are good enough,” he chuckled, getting up to throw away the now empty coffee cups. “Do you want me to help?”

In all honesty you wanted to go back and tell yourself that this was happening. Externally you seemed fine, at ease with what was happening – keeping things under control – and yet internally you were panicking every way you knew how to panic. Breathing heavily would get you nowhere. This was the epitome of what you would deem a breakdown and you weren’t quite sure how to end it.

“You can grab the bowl?” It sounded more like a question than a suggestion. The reassurance of his smile seemed to calm you slightly, but still you worried. There wouldn’t be a part of you that didn’t worry the whole time he was here in your universe.

While he stood by and helped in the process of making the food, you ran through every option you had learned about the multiverse. There wasn’t much to go on; really anything to go on. The lack of information only meant that you would be going off of what Stephen knew. Not exactly a comfort in your case. What did he know about all of this? Was he the cause of all of this?

That was another question entirely. One you didn’t wish to delve into.

At least not right now.

“After we eat I guess we can head out to the address given.” You wanted to adhere to a set sort of list, because the madness of yesterday had left you frazzled beyond belief.

He nodded, shoving a forkful of pancakes – practically dripping in syrup – into his mouth. Some small part of you wondered how exactly he met you from a different universe. It felt like territory you had no business in, but curiosity was always a scientist's greatest downfall. This case just happened to be more personal than anything else. You could see yourself falling for someone like him and while it was selfish of you to even think it – you didn’t want him to leave so suddenly.

Shaking your head, you forced your mind to focus on the objective in front of you.

Getting him home was priority number one as of right now. Dealing with the intense emotions of longing for someone who didn’t technically belong with you was another thing entirely. That could be handled later on. When your head was properly screwed on and things weren’t so chaotic.

“What does this guy do?”

“Do?” You knew what he was implying. Answering him however felt like a plight you would rather avoid at any costs.

He swallowed. “Is he a scientist?”

“He’s a…” How do you phrase this answer that explains how wizards exist in this universe? To be fair there had been a fair few more things that sounded far more shocking than the existence of wizards. “He’s a doctor.”

You were such a chicken shit.

“How – How is a doctor going to help?”

Sincerely…you had no clue. The extent of your knowledge on Stephen being a wizard was just that – he was a wizard and it ended there. You weren’t sure what he did or how he did it. Calling him had been a last resort of sorts, yet it was one you jumped to first.

“He’s going to help us – uh – get you home? He can do things that I’ve never seen a normal person do,” your replied, shoving the pancakes in your mouth to keep yourself busy.

The rest of the breakfast the both of you sat in silence. Focusing instead on the textbooks that were still sprawled around you, each page loaded with post-it notes. Scribblings that might help the situation you were currently in. If not they may help you understand what had to be done in order to help. You couldn’t do magic, didn’t know the first thing about how to wield the powers of the universe, but if there’s one thing you could do. It was science.

Science was simple to understand.

Science had results and solutions and in your case you needed that now more than ever.

“I’ll grab my coat,” you said, grabbing your half filled notebook of notes shared between you and Peter.

He was fixing something on his wrist with a small screwdriver while you made sure that you brought everything needed. Of course, Stephen had his own textbooks and the information you found might very well be useless. That wouldn’t stop you from trying. It took you shoving yourself out the door to actually go through with this plan. Part of you was still wracked with terror at the thought of being apart of a problem this massive. Yet the other part of you – the one who used to thrive in situations where the unknown surrounded you at every turn – couldn’t have been happier.

Finally, life held a meaning again.

Finally, you had a purpose.

After graduating college, it felt like you were meandering about in life. Attempting to fill a void that left you aching for something to do – something where you weren’t completely useless. This felt like that something.

“We can take the subway.” You reached for your wallet. “Nobody knows that you’re Peter Parker and well you look completely different from the one in this universe. It shouldn’t be an issue.”

“Sounds like a plan. Just one really small question.”

“Yeah?”

“Will – uh – will that be an issue?” He pointed to something behind you.

Your head swiveled to the billboard that currently plastered a video of what looked to be Stephen Strange fighting Spider-Man. Things couldn’t go your way once could they. Sighing, you rushed to yank your phone out of your back pocket, dialing Stephen’s number instantly. The video playing before you was live, which meant that his phone…

‘This is Stephen Strange. I’m not available at the moment so leave a message and I’ll see what I can do about getting back to you.’

…would go to voicemail.

“What the fuck Stephen,” you spit out, loud enough for others passing you on the street to spare you a quick glance.

“Is that the doctor?” he asked, watching the screen, seemingly hooked at the sight of another him fighting. “He doesn’t look…like other doctors I’ve seen.”

You chuckled dryly. “What, they don’t have magical doctors at hospitals in your universe?”

A smile flashed across his face as he shoved his hands in his pockets. “I don’t know. They might. I don’t have health insurance so I don’t see many doctors. Well…any doctors really.”

“You don’t have-” Stopping in the middle of the sidewalk, you turned to stare at him, absolutely positive that an incredulous expression was all he saw. “Aren’t you a superhero?”

He nodded. “Yeah.”

“And you don’t have health insurance? How the hell do you heal?”

A shrug followed your question; as if he was just thinking about it now for the very first time. “The spider that kind of – you know – bit me-”

“I didn’t know a spider bit you.”

He paused. “Oh- Well…that’s how I became who I am.”

“Which does what? Give you spectacular healing powers?”

“Basically,” he said, apologizing as someone shoved into him.

Learning that a superhero was surviving solely on wits alone in the middle of a busy street in New York was not how you expected this day to go. Wasn’t the you from his universe making sure that he didn't end up killing himself? A loud noise echoed behind you as the screen changed to show something large terrorizing people on the street.

“Is that one of yours?” you asked, watching open-mouthed as the man turned to…sand.

Peter was in the same boat you were. “Definitely not.”

“I’ve never seen it before.”

Now it was his turn to look shocked. “Does that mean…”

“There’s another Peter Parker running around New York?” You hoped not. “Fucking fantastic,” you muttered, turning away from the screen and heading towards the subway entrance. “We’ve got to get over there!”

“Isn’t the doctor gone?” The sound of his shoes slamming against the steps behind you let you know he was running behind you.

“Yes, but he might come back. Hopefully.” You slammed to a full stop on the center of the stairs as a realization hit you hard. If it wasn’t for Peter wrapping an arm around your waist you would have fallen over when he accidentally slammed into you. “Fuck!”

“I’m sorry,” he stumbled over his words.

You ignored the flutter of your heart as his arm remained around you; even as you turned to face him he still didn’t let go. “No, not you.”

“Oh. What’s wrong?”

“The other Peter,” you said.

He nodded, not following your thought process at all. “What about him?”

“He doesn’t know what’s going on. Which means he might be looking for this universe’s Peter as well.”

“So you’re saying instead of finding this doctor-”

“We have to find Peter.” Apologizing loudly to the people that were walking around the two of you with sheer annoyance on their faces, you grabbed his hand, running up the stairs with him in tow.

To your relief, the billboard still showed Spider-Man swinging through the air and you scribbled out the address of where the helicopter following him was. Somewhere outside of Queens at an apartment you didn’t recognize. Whatever was going on, the news sure was keeping track of where this kid went. You only hoped that when all of this ended, he was left alone completely.

The pungent smells of the subway fill your nose as Peter and you get on a different train completely. Heading towards the apartment was your only chance in figuring out what the fuck was going on. You only hoped that the third Peter would have the same sense to do exactly what the two of you were doing. The rumbling of the subway helped you to lose sense of time for a bit – instead focusing on something other than the fact that you were heading somewhere dangerous.

“Why don’t you have health insurance?” The question popped out of your mouth quicker than you could reign it in.

Peter reared back, pulling himself out of his own thoughts. “I- What?”

“You said you don't have any and I’m just wondering why the me of your universe would allow that to happen?” This was none of your business. “It’s just – you should have a back up plan. I know it’s ridiculous and you can heal fast, but it’s still sensible that a-” You trailed off at the sight of his face. He was smiling at you with a glint in his eyes you couldn’t read fully. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

Laughing, he ducked his head down to shove the false glasses further up his nose. “No I’m sorry it’s just – your rant reminded me of…well…you.”

“Me?” He nodded. “Oh! Me. So I’ve had this conversation with you before?”

“Yeah actually – you have this conversation a lot with me. Every time I come back a little bruised.”

“A little?”

Another laugh had you definitely considering the ramifications of asking him to stay here. “You say that too.”

“I’m very smart,” you said, a small grin playing on your lips.

“Part of why I love you.”

The sentence slipped out and it took him a few seconds of realizing what he said to actually react. His eyes widened, mouth opening to quickly withdraw his comment, but the screeching of the subway stopping cut him off. Ignoring the punched out breath you let out, you turned away from him and got off at the stop. He said it without thinking. You were identical to the you of his life. In a way that must have confused him for a second.

It was the only logical reason you could come to. So why did it hurt so much to finally settle on that answer?

The building was a few blocks down the street and you figured bursting into the place wasn’t the best option. Which left you with one option; waiting until someone came out. Heading into the bodega on the corner you figured it would be better to get lunch and perch somewhere until something panned out.

Peter followed along beside you, stuck in his own thoughts at the moment. Maybe it was better this way. You weren’t together, you weren’t in each other's lives, shit you weren’t even friends at this point. No, this was merely a courtesy you were doing to assist him. Nothing more – right?

“It’ll take awhile to see any action so I suggest some lunch.” Tossing him a pre-packaged sandwich, you watched him catch it without looking.

“Where do we wait?”

You shrugged, snatching the last bag of chips off the shelf and a half a sandwich to go with a drink. “I’m sure there’s a rooftop we can occupy around here.”

“A rooftop? You sure?”

“It’s a concrete jungle. There’s loads of rooftops.” Your indifference to the situation was showing; or maybe that was you being numb to everything around you. The shock factor had worn off the second he said those words. What did you have to feel this way about though?

He wasn’t yours.

Paying what the food cost, you followed Peter outside, glancing up at the building currently housing the other Peter. The two of you only needed to wait for a few hours. So, you picked the building across the street and began to walk quickly to avoid the oncoming barrage of cars. He was quicker than you though, yanking you out of the way and into his chest as a car’s horn echoed sharply in the air behind you.

“Are you okay?” he asked, tilting your head back to see you better.

This position, his eyes, the concern clearly showing on his face, all of it felt far too intimate. You weren’t meant to be in this state with him and yet there you stood. Admiring how the brown of his eyes almost shined when they caught the sun. Pulling away from him slowly felt like more of a hassle than almost getting hit by a car, but it would have to happen eventually.

He had to go home.

That shook you out of your doe eyed state.

“Let’s go,” you mumbled.

It was another apartment building that you had to try and get into. Pushing the buzzer for a random attendant, you glanced behind you just in case someone was looking to get in with you. Only once had you done this before and it was to get to a rooftop on new year's eve to see the fireworks.

“Hello?” A man’s voice came through the crackling speaker.

“Oh hello!” you exclaimed. “I’m locked out of the building. Could you-” The buzz of the door unlocking cut off the rest of your question. “Thank you.”

Peter grabbed the door, rushing in after you and up the stairs towards the roof before someone could spot you. It wasn’t normal to know your neighbors in New York, but for all you knew this building regularly checked in on who lived near them. You knew yours. Well…only Mrs. Sanders who lived next door, but that was mainly due to the fact that her cat regularly found it’s way into your apartment.

“Do you have super vision?”

“I – don’t think so,” he replied, smiling as you tried to unstick the door to the roof. “Let me.”

One shove of his shoulder into the door and it slammed open. Louder than you had anticipated.

“Well I can’t see what’s going on across the street so I was thinking that you might be able to.”

Shaking his head, he handed you the sandwich you bought earlier before finding a place to sit. “That’s not really how it works.”

“How does it work exactly?” You took the spot next to him, opening the bag of chips and offering him one.

“As in, what powers do I have?” You nodded. “Oh – uh – okay well I have this kind of sense where I can pick up on things. You actually joked around and called it my spider sense. That name kind of stuck eventually. Uh – I’m strong?”

“Like superman strong?”

He laughed, opening his apple juice. “Kinda. I can stop a bus with nothing but my hands.”

“Wow. That’s…wow.” Squinting to see across the street, you thought you noticed some movement from the apartment. “Anything else?”

“I’m sticky.”

Choking on your drink was involuntary as you laughed and it was enough to make him join you. “Sticky? As in…actually sticky? What do you just attach to things?”

He grimaces, taking a bite out of his sandwich. “I learned that the hard way. On a subway station.”

“Please tell me everything about that situation.”

Leaning back against the stack of boxes behind you, he smiles. “It started by me being asleep.”

Four hours passed quicker than you expected it to. After hour number three you had gone back across the street to get some more food in the hopes that it wouldn’t take much longer. Once hour number four passed though you were beginning to lose hope. Eventually you’d have to go home and the longer you sat there, the more you wondered if they were actually in that building.

Peter stood beside you, breathing in the musty fresh air as horns and sounds of traffic echoed around you. If the fact that he had to go home wasn’t an issue, you would have actually found this to be quite a romantic moment.

“I just have to say-” He turned so swiftly that you nearly jumped.

“Yeah?”

“When I said I love you earlier it wasn’t like I was saying I love you to…”

Your heart sank. “Oh – I know.”

“No I mean-” He watched you so intensely that you were sure he must have spotted something on your face. “It’s just that you’re exactly the same. I don’t even know…I’m not sure…”

Nodding, you picked at the chipped nail polish that covered your nails. “It’s really okay I know that you were confused.”

“I was, but now I’m not anymore.”

Catching his gaze, you couldn’t move. Once again you admired the brown, enraptured by the sea of emotions that played in them. If you were stuck on a roof with anyone else you would have lost your mind, and yet with him – you felt like days could pass and you wouldn’t notice. You had looked up the scientific term for soulmates last night to humor yourself and yet…it seemed that things such as that – trivial things – were somewhat true.

“You’re not?” you breathed, the sound of traffic tuning out in the background.

He shook his head subtly, leaning in even closer. “Why are you so…”

“So?”

A warm palm cupped from your cheek, sliding towards your neck to pull you closer. “Perfect,” he whispered, capturing your lips with his in a swift kiss.

Inhaling sharply, you found your arms wrapping around his neck, pulling him even closer as one hand tangled in his hair. Kissing him shouldn’t have been this electrifying. It shouldn’t have made your toes curl and your pulse quicken to a point of nearly being lightheaded. In spite of all of that, it still did and you found that you couldn’t pull away from him.

His arm wrapped around your waist, tugging you towards him as he licked at your bottom lip asking timidly for permission to deepen the kiss. One which you gave without question. If you thought you were dizzy before, this caused you to melt into his body. He tasted like apple juice, chocolate, and something purely him. The warmth of his mouth pressed against yours left you reeling, but it was something you wanted to relish in for as long as you could.

It seemed…you spoke too soon.

An explosion shook the building you were in, causing you to stumble. Peter – looking thoroughly kissed and flushed – cupped your face to check on you before turning to see the situation. Across the street, the bottom of the building had been nearly blown to bits with rubble strewn everywhere.

“Holy shit,” you whispered, gaping at the sight.

A green figure flew out, going over where you and Peter stood before vanishing into the night. Whatever caused this explosion was from them. Which meant that the other Peter had been in there the entire time. You turned to tell Peter that the goblin creature had to be found, only to see him yanking a red mask out of the bag he’d been carrying.

“I’m sorry,” he said, already dressed in his suit. “I’ve got to find him.”

“I’ll go with you,” you replied, grabbing the bag and strapping it across your shoulder.

“No.”

You scoffed. “I can help you. I know how to- What are you doing?”

He leaned over the edge of the building. “Please stay away from this.”

“Peter no I can-”

“No!” he shouted, running a hand over his face. “Please. I know what will happen when you get involved and I can’t…I can’t do that to someone I care about. Not again. Please.”

The look on his face, the raw pain that he showed you, was the final factor in this decision. “Peter.”

“Don’t fight me on this-”

Getting closer, you cupped his cheek, pressing your lips against his quickly. “Be safe.”

He smiled tightly before you were watching him leap off the side of the roof. A now familiar thwip echoed in the night sky as he swung off into the distance, following whatever flew from the building. How you ended up in this predicament you’d never know, but there you were. Standing alone and trying to figure out a way to help him despite everything he said.

“I’m definitely not cut out for this,” you muttered to yourself as you began to take the stairs down all the way to the bottom floor, wishing you had superpowers that would allow you to swing from buildings.

[mittensmorgul]

I'm shook. Dean actually admitted that Chuck doesn't care, that Chuck just left and ignored all of his responsibilities. I thought Dean was pro-Chuck, I mean, he called Chuck a bestie, didn't he? I'm not sure if he really resents Chuck or he was just too depressed to think straight. I'm still shook though. (Oh, and if you're feeling unwell I hope you recover. I wish you luck. May October be kind to you.)

Aahhh, thank you. :P And yeah, I’ve been sick since Walker-Stalker Philly a few weeks ago, stupid con crud that turned into bronchitis because I am a weakling with no immune system. :D

I’ve also been debating whether I should write tonight (fic, which I have a deadline of december 2 on and I’m not even close to finished on), or if I should write a long meta on Fathers, or if I should just go to sleep and try again tomorrow. But this bit about Chuck, and how Dean feels about Chuck as an absent father figure, would factor into that meta.

I mean Dean’s always held a grudge against God since… ever probably, but at least in text as far back as 5.02 when Cas set out in search of God to help stop the apocalypse. Chuck never really grew into anything Dean could really respect any more than that, you know? Even the burden Chuck laid on him at the end of s11 wasn’t what Dean wanted. Dean had his ENTIRE LIFE ruined because of Chuck’s inability to clean up his own mess, and then suddenly Dean fixes it FOR him, and Chuck just sashays off into the sunset with Amara and again lays the entire burden for taking care of EVERYTHING at Dean’s feet… but Dean’s still just a guy doing a job. He doesn’t have Cosmic God Powers to just fix stuff when it goes wrong. How the hell is he meant to take care of the entire world?

He does try, though. Oh, how he tries. Until it crushes and breaks him.

(and whoopsie this is actually shaping up to BE that meta on fathers I’ve been thinking about, so guess how I’m gonna spend the next hour! WHEEE! *tosses fic writing plans out the window*)

I’ll start with the easiest one: Dean referring to Chuck as his bestie. In 12.04:

Gail: Do you know God, gentlemen?Dean: Oh yeah. Yeah, we’re- we’re besties.

Said with about 9 tons of sarcasm. I’d find a gif to demonstrate just how done Dean was in that scene, but he was pretty much done with EVERYTHING in 12.04. I think that nicely sums up his attitude going into that conversation.

But yes, I 100% do feel like Dean resents Chuck– for laying this burden on him and not giving him ANYTHING else. He laid this out to Chuck’s face in 11.21:

Dean: Here’s the thing, um…Chuck… And I mean no disrespect. Um… I’m guessing you came back to help with the Darkness, and that’s great. That’s, you know – It’s fantastic. Um, but you’ve been gone a – a… long, long time. And there’s so much crap that has gone down on the Earth for thousands of years. I mean, plagues and wars, slaughters. And you were, I don’t know, writing books, going to fan conventions. Were you even aware, o-or did you just tune it out?Chuck: I was aware, Dean.Dean: But you did nothing. And, again, I-I’m not trying to piss you off. You know, I don’t want to turn into a pillar of salt.Chuck: I actually… didn’t do that.Dean: Okay. People – People pray to you. People build churches for you. They fight wars in your name, and you did nothing.Chuck: You’re frustrated. I get it. Believe me, I was hands-on – Real hands-on for, wow, ages. I was so sure if I kept stepping in, teaching, punishing, that these beautiful creatures that I created… would grow up. But it only stayed the same. And I saw that I needed to step away and let my baby find its way. Being overinvolved is no longer parenting. [Sighs] It’s enabling.Dean: But it didn’t get better.Chuck: Well, I’ve been mulling it over. And from where I sit, I think it has.Dean: Well, from where I sit, it feels like you left us and you’re trying to justify it.Chuck: I know you had a complicated upbringing, Dean, but don’t confuse me with your dad.

And that’s it, really. The crux of Dean’s feelings toward Chuck. And that never really changed. Dean still had to take the burden of sacrifice on HIMSELF (carrying the Soul Bomb to Amara) because Chuck didn’t or couldn’t or just wouldn’t. It wasn’t Chuck that saved the world there, it was Dean using his words with Amara, dragging Chuck kicking and screaming into the conversation.

Okay, not kicking and screaming, more like whimpering and huddling… whatever… :P

But Chuck told Dean not to confuse him with John, and mistake his own “complicated upbringing” for Chuck’s “parenting” of the entire universe. And yet… as above, so below. And Chuck himself “chose” Dean as his mirror.

Then we have Dean’s own complicated Father Issues, from how John raised him, to how he was forced to raise Sam. As he said in 12.22 to Mary, he was forced to not only be a father to Sam, but a mother as well. And it wasn’t fair to Dean, and he hated Mary for her deal that put him in that position in the first place. What was unsaid there, but plain as day anyway, was that he hated John for it, too.

Lizbob and I were talking earlier about how Jack was describing the fact that he WAS his mother for a while before he was born, and how the very act of his birth sucked the life out of Kelly, and how that was a horrifying metaphor for motherhood, but Dean has said it himself, of Sam. Back in 10.03, when Sam was curing him of being a demon:

DEAN: You notice I tried to get as far away from you as possible? Away from your whining, your complaining. I chose the King of Hell over you! Maybe I was just … tired of babysitting you. Or always having to yank your lame ass out of the fire since … [Dean laughs.] Forever. Or maybe … Maybe it was the fact that my mother would still be alive if it wasn’t for you. That your very existence sucked the life out of my life!SAM: This isn’t my brother talking.DEAN: You never had a brother! Just an excuse for not manning up. But guess what: I quit.SAM: No. No, you don’t. You don’t get to quit. We don’t get to quit in this family! This family is all we have ever had!DEAN: Well, then, we got nothin’.SAM: Would you say that to Dad?DEAN: Dad? Oh, there’s a prize. There’s a man who brainwashed us into wasting our lives fighting his losing battle!

Sam’s “very existence sucked the life” out of Dean’s life, just like Jack literally did to his mother, just TWO EPISODES AFTER Dean broke through to Mary with his confession about the horrors of his life, and his anger over having to be both mother and father to Sam.

And this was about the point I hit my EUREKA! moment over why the idea of Dean being forced to be a parent to Jack just pushed every NOPE NOPE NOPE button in my entire body. Because he’s JUST NOW finally letting go of feeling like his entire life had been one long forced obligation to be a parent to Sam, and now here’s this new pseudo-manbaby with frightening and potentially Dangerous Magical Abilities who needs parenting and looking after that was foisted on him against his will AGAIN.

I mean, it’s like the ultimate in Cosmically Un-Fucking-Fair.

And even the notion that Cas should be responsible for “parenting” the giant nougat-loving nuke in lost-and-found clothes just… sits so wrong with me for the exact same reason. How long has Cas been a guardian to Dean? How big was the whole “You aren’t our babysitter” theme last season? That Cas never really had time to internalize before Jack hijacked Cas’s “babysitter” instincts for his own purposes?

Yes, it’s sweet and I can see that the parallels between Jack and Cas are being written really well so far, but the cutesy Cas-as-Jack’s-Daddy stuff just physically sickens me (which is saying something considering how physically sick I am as a baseline here…). I don’t think it’s “cute.” And I’m saying this as someone who LOVES Jack as a character.

Kelly (who was literally already “dead” at the point she met Cas, and was technically– according to Jack himself– already “Jack” at that point) had sized up Cas and decided that he would make a good guardian for Jack, and that Dagon would make a bad guardian for him, and took matters into her own hands in order to make that happen. Literally took Cas’s hand without his permission, after he’d declined to touch her stomach, and then forced his hand again after literally hijacking Baby and driving Cas to the scene of her “vision.” Then literally taking Cas’s hand again to force events to unfold as they had in the vision, without regard to any of the other horrors that played out as a result– such as Joshua having been killed by Dagon, the Colt being destroyed, Sam and Dean being hurt, Cas nearly getting killed, and then zapping enough power through Cas to kill Dagon, a being of a type we’ve only ever seen harmed by the Colt and the Lance of Michael. It was clear early on that Jack had Serious Power and yet we see he has practically NO CONTROL over it.

I am soooo tempted to apply a little bit of Miriam’s description of Becky to Jack… 

He sees something he wants and just takes it without a thought for who it might hurt. He took candy from the vending machine in 13.01, but… he kinda did that to Cas, too. Even before he was born, he saw the sort of devotion Cas had to the people he cared about and even if he didn’t understand WHY, he understood through Kelly that this was something he would need for himself. So he took it, even if it might hurt other people.

Just like he flung his power out at the sheriff when she touched him while he was being assaulted by angel radio. He didn’t intend to hurt her, but he was already in pain and frightened and that’s just how his power works for him right now… as if it’s “him but not him.” Almost like it’s an independent entity that’s in Extreme Self-Protection Mode.

That’s how Miriam described Dean, as someone who takes things and breaks things no matter who it hurts. But really… that’s not Dean, and that’s not Jack either– or at least not what Jack would CHOOSE to be. But from the outside, it kinda looks that way.

So, yeah, I LOVE the idea that Sam is finally getting a turn at forced parenthood from the other side of the equation. It fits beautifully with his own arc toward self-forgiveness and acceptance of his own powers and feelings of whether or not he was inherently evil because of what had been done to him as a baby. I LOVE the idea that Sam will get to experience being a father and mother to someone going through much the same things he did all his life (albeit as an adult, which was not a luxury Dean had when he was forced into a parental role at the age of almost five).

But for Dean? I’m horrified that this has been forced on him again. And for Cas? The fact it’s not something he chose of his own free will, nor gave informed consent to before he was sock-puppeted into becoming Jack’s babysitter… yeah, I find it moderately to seriously disturbing…

And for the sake little baby Jesus, I AM NOT IMPLYING THAT JACK IS EVIL. I AM NOT IMPLYING THAT JACK IS NOT “GOOD.” Good and evil are entirely irrelevant to this conversation.

But Jack’s power did something to Kelly. And it did something to Cas. It wasn’t done with malicious intent, but IT WAS DONE TO THEM. And it’s something that severely limited their free will. We’ve seen how Jack’s power works, without his active CHOICE to make stuff happen. He’s on a fight or flight sort of level with it right now, and it just happens to be set to overkill, you know? I’m sure he’ll get a better handle on it eventually, but I think it’s also going to be a vulnerability that others may try to exploit (enter Asmodeus, or potentially AU Michael, and possibly eventually Lucifer… this isn’t going to be an easy journey for Jack).

Anyway I think I’ve wandered so far off topic of your original question, but congrats, you won the Which Question Will Result In Actual Meta award this week! :P

I think it’s been more than an hour. *checks clock* *what even is time anymore* It’s definitely been more than an hour.