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arthurtaylorlester · 6 months

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RETURN OF THE KING: MALEVOLENT LIVEBLOG EPISODE 37 THE FARM

spoilers (you already know)

back at it with some humming!

JOHN MY BELOVED !!!! youre so bitchy i love him

HES SO PETTY HELP

harpers hill mention omg (harpers hill hijinks coming soon)

“MY BOOK HMPH 😤” girl 😭😭

“i didnt realise” yes because you cant see and john is like really really dumb

it kills me that john is bitching about oscar not finding anything but like what information have you contributed in the last 3 episodes

ive missed bullying john

malevolent is a comedy and i will stand by that

mmm rain sounds

HYPNOS GREEK GOD MENTION ‼️

“can you imagine hahah” yes i can it was the best arc of the show send tweet

well you havent seen his face

whys john being so quiet all of a sudden?

OH WHAT THEFUCK I SAW RHIS COMING

“i suppose ill just watch again” SOMEONE IS A JEALOUS GIRL

arthur ignoring john….. the girls are going to DIVORCE

“not you sorry ^_^” and then he goes back to ignoring john?? girl

oh wait that was very sweet

WHAT THE FUCK I JUST TOOK ABDHDNFN

sorry arthur speaking to john like that just destroyed me

I TRUST YOU AND YOUR MY FRIEND??? IM NOT TRYING TO IGNORE YOU?? THEYRE COMMUNICATING A

“its not because i dont care 💛” “…yes?” oscar this isnt about you

poor guy though he must be so confused

arthurs tone changes so much when he speaks to john

someone get john a pair of glasses either that or he was too busy daydreaming to see the turnoff

oh of course john would want to split off because he hasnt ever seen a horror movie arthur if you die then it’s your fault for not showing him the movie 🙄

“we might have to sleep in the car” okayyyy

oh so now john wants to give him info because he deserves to know

aaaand now he doesnt want to tell him. we love a hypocritical king !!!

return of the canadian sourry

you dont need to sound so smug that he looks hurt john 😭😭

okay oscar love the existential crisis while reading very relatable

is he gonna say arthur is his purpose

oh for fucks sake

NOT THE SOFT “oscar”

ok oscar is def into arthur and arthur saying “i don’t believe in god” is like rejection. this is how unrequited blindfaith can still win.

also god believes in you? well john and kayne sure seem to believe in him for what its worth

oscar nooo dont devote yourself to arthur that never ends well

john i dont care about oscar either but you have got to stop laying it on so think jfc

john the undefeated more like john the opportunist

“woAH” same john same

oooh so john can see auras now basically?

what monster are we gonna find in the barn 👀

oh that sounds fun actually though /j

AWW I KNEW HE WAS GONNA ASK IF HE WAS OK

ok i love how prominent the dreamlands are this episode i was just thinking about how good it was

john just wants his alone time with arthur because he cant answer his questions

“i need another set of eyes” thats like the one thing john can do it must be kinda sad to like, not be able to fully do the one thing you used to be great at

“ *gasp* a forgotten one :0” john dont act like you know what that means

hey is john a forgotten one then. is he. is he though.

can everyone except arthur feel the weirdness of places

NOT THE MUSIC BOX MUSIC IN THE BACKGROUND HARLAN WHEN ARE YOU GIVING US AN OST PLEASE IM BEGGIN YOU

ITS MIDNIGHT DONT GO IN THE FUCKING BASEMENT ITS RAINING YOURE BEING CHASED BY AN EDLRITCH THING

john its ok if you didnt see it you dont need to justify yourself ❤️‍🩹

john sounds almost scared to go in the basement lol

the stairs are gonna give out at a later date im calling it

what could possibly happen in the last 15 minutes

a door ajar omg is that a wtnv reference

did arthur almost die by getting crushed by a bunch of furniture

oh a barricade i know what this is about

oh happy halloween btw guys

OSCAR JUMPSCARE

my honest reaction too john

what… what did you just sink into….

oh hole in roof, cool

arthur pay attention oscar hes gonna set hjmself on fire on accident

the jarthur was too busy analysing the painting to pay attention to oscar

OH GODDAMIT ARTHRJ WHAT THE FUCK JOHN WHAT THE DAGGER? THE ONE HE SLIT HIS THROAT WITH

oh he wants to cut it off ok

jfc 7 minutes oh no

I CALLED THE STAIRS CAVING IN

GUYS HE WAS READING THE BOOK OFC HE KNOWS

question: how strong is arthur physically

“A TOWEL!” “A TOWEL?” as i said a comedy

WE GOT A “WELL DONE ORTHUR” LETS GO

you know its weird that i can handle this fine but couldnt deal with the michael torture in the woe.begone finale

NO ARTHUR ITS NOT OK

HES ISNT GOING TO MAKE IT

oh ok hes fine sort of ok

the music goes so hard again

that arthur was so scared

ok the arms alive run

or get john to arm wrestle it idk

“what thE fUCK WHAT THE FUCK” my daily vocabulary

and oscar was right :)

RUN YOU IDIOTS

arthur you could at least carry him instead of dragging him that poor poor man

i find it amusing that this mostly happened because of jarthur studying a painting and ignoring the man currently in possession of their braincells

indeed what do we do now

and thats a wrap! oh boy what an episode i have THOUGTHTS (oscar is not surviving this)

i know like maybe 2 people read this type of posts but i enjoy making and reading them back. so if youd like me to keep going with these i will :)

#malevolent #malevolent podcast #unhinged aromantics #arthur lester #john doe #john malevolent #arthur malevolent #malevolent john #malevolent arthur #oscar malevolent #malevolent oscar #malevolent spoilers #mr scratch #malevolent part 37

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amazingmsme · 2 months

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Just some ghost!polites headcanons because I’ve been Big Sad & I need a healthy dose of angst to cope. As always, gotta sprinkle in some fluff to balance out the angst

Polites wakes up in the ferry on the River Styx with the other soldiers that died in the cave & it’s literally just like Skyrim . They get dumped off & unlike the others, he tries to stick to the people he knows. But they’re dead, & they don’t really care about camaraderie like he does anymore. So he’s just kinda wondering through the underworld aimlessly, just trying to get himself acquainted & get used to things

Apparently at the time of the Odyssey, Hades (the place) was in shambles. It had no order to the souls or the layout itself. So needless to say, Polites is pretty miserable down there

Also, however you looked when you died is how you look in the afterlife so… yeah. Ok but despite all the heartbreak that comes with that… his broken glasses sit crooked on his face & it’s real cute if you can get past the fact he’s bleeding, broken & bruised

I feel like he died with unfinished business, whether that be just making it back home to Ithica or something else. Either way, he’s a restless spirit with earthly ties. At first when he sees Odysseus & what’s left of the army, he thinks they all died & he’s heartbroken, but then he notices how different they look from everyone else around him & he realizes. They’re alive. & he’s so drawn to them, because it’s the one comfort he’s had since arriving in Hades. So he just sneaks in behind them & tries to hide/blend in towards the back

Maybe to make things interesting, a soldier could find out his wife died while he was away, but the way he found out was literally by seeing her in the underworld. Polites recognizes him & approaches to ask what’s wrong because he can see they’re both upset & if there’s any way he could help. & the soldier wants to stay with his wife, & Polites sees his 1 chance to get out of here. So they kind of trade places, because with that few people you’d def notice an extra person in your crew after romping through the underworld, but if the numbers are the same, then it’s less noticeable. & if you wanna make things extra interesting, this could happen by Polites possessing the soldier’s body, but personally I like the straight up ghost route. But hey, possession is always fun!

But no one notices he’s there until they’re almost out, & they’re about to pass between the 2 monsters & he shyly speaks up like “uh Captain? I think I know a better way” & Odysseus whips around like “who said that?” Because what the hell do they mean they know a better way through the underworld? But even more importantly, that sounded just like-

& then he sees him & on reflex he screams & draws his sword & Polites looks so (emotionally) hurt by that & he’s like “Captain it’s me, Polites” & it takes a second for Odysseus recognize him through the blood & the bruising, but yeah, that’s the Polites they know & love. Except… not.

But he really does know a better way to escape, & they don’t have to sacrifice any men. They make it back to the ship relatively easily & needless to say everyone is keeping their distance from Polites

He can sense the underlying fear & guilt they all feel when he’s around, & it really hurts him because he doesn’t hold any ill will about it. They couldn’t help it. & he wants to get past that & show them it’s still him, but how can he do that when everyone’s afraid to even talk to him? They can’t even look him in the eye anymore, does he really look that bad?

He starts to feel isolated & the weight of being dead really hits him as he watches the rest of them from afar. He doesn’t always choose to appear for this reason. He doesn’t want to feel like a bother, or like he’s getting in the way

He tries to remind himself that it could be worse, & he doesn’t want to go back to the underworld. So he has to try & keep himself entertained & upbeat & his favorite way to do that is by pulling what he calls “ghost pranks.” He’ll steal shit & make it go missing only to have it show up in obvious places, move shit through the air, rattle around in the kitchen at night (or mess with the loud ass anchor chain, that’s almost worse) but his favorite way to fuck with his friends is to tickle them out of the blue & the worst part is he won’t even actually be there, he’ll just be invisible & messing with them on purpose

At first his antics are more common as he tries to make his presence known & accepted, but everyone is at least little creeped out & he starts goofing off less & less. & you’d think it would take more effort to appear to people, but it’s a conscious effort to stay invisible. So I like to think that one day Odysseus was wondering about the ship & he noticed Polites sitting at the railing looking glum as ever & it’s just such a sad sight it makes him realize they haven’t exactly been the nicest or most accepting of him now that he’s back. So he goes over & sits next to him & he apologizes for the way he’s been since he came back. They have a nice long chat & talk out some stuff that really didn’t need to remain unsaid

He’s not his happy go lucky self like he used to be, but he’s still pretty optimistic… regarding other people. In regards to himself, he gets all teary eyed & you can tell he’s trying so damn hard to frame things in a decent light. Because he’s always been a glass half full kinda guy, so he’s gotta always see it that way regardless. Right?

Odysseus can’t stand seeing him so upset & it’s literally eating him alive. He’s talking to Eurylochus about it & saying how he’s so much sadder now than he used to be & it’s “not as easy” to cheer him up. & Eurylochus, half joking, is like “yeah, too bad you can’t tickle him” & Odysseus is like … 😈

Eurylochus is like “you can’t be serious” & he’s like “hey it’s worth a shot! If any ghost is ticklish it’ll be him” Like ok he doesn’t even have a body but go off I guess

But he catches Polites when he’s feeling down, & when his normal cheer up methods don’t work, he barely bites back a smirk. Polites knows that damn look but thinks he’s safe since he’s a ghost & why would Odysseus even bother trying? It would be pointless. But he’s interacted with solid objects before, so just maybe solid objects can interact with him

But Polites just arches a brow & looks at him like “what?” & Odysseus legit just comes right out & says it “you look too sad. I think someone needs a visit from the tickle monster” & Polites gets this sad, wistful smile, but he’s also looking at Odysseus like he’s gone off the deep end & he just snorts like “yeah good luck with that” except he’s nothing but stubborn & determined, so on impulse he goes to squeeze his side. & Odysseus can feel that something’s there, but his hand can still kinda phase through. & Polites shrieks, mostly out of shock because he never thought a ghost would be ticklish, & he & Odysseus are equally surprised. & Odysseus is so mischievous because he’s really missed getting to make his best friend squeal with laughter, & now it’s paired with morbid curiosity because he’s so fascinated by the fact that ghosts are apparently ticklish. & he’s fake interrogating him asking how it feels & how different it is from when he was alive & I’m such a sucker for the trope where it tickles when you stick your hand through a ghost

It really is like the old Polites is back, & they start to get used to their new resident ghost

Even tho he’s already dead & he doesn’t technically have any stakes in the game, he carries out orders & when they’re faced with a challenge, he fights just as hard as the rest of them to make it out safe. & he is more than willing to sacrifice himself to save a fellow soldier. & even tho he’s dead, it’s still just as upsetting for Odysseus to watch as if he were still alive

If/when I write it, idk whether I’m gonna keep it where Odysseus is the only one who makes it back, because imagine how much it’ll hurt both of them to continue seeing everyone around them drop like flies. How in the end they only have each other. But it could also be such a game changer to have 1 more man on their crew, especially if he has some ghost powers. & even the power of moral can be a huge game changer

That’s all I got for now, let me know if y’all want more ghost!polites headcanons, or shoot me some of your own! wink wink nudge nudge

#ghost!polites #epic headcanons #epic the musical #the odyssey #polites #odysseus #eurylochus

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green-loser-lover · 6 months

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more meth snake au (read w caution this could hurt maybe)

we left off with ace having ideas!! basically he was like "if snake likes booze that much what if i find somefin stronga" (his speech is fun to write sorry). ace is a guy who knows a guy whos cousins dogs friends hair salonists grocer sells drugs and he buys(eh..) a bit of meth

i think ace would pull snake aside and basically lie through his teeth like "just one time wont kill yah buddy" "sures i done this before. lookit me! i turned out fine" "juust one time" and snake cant rrly say no so yeah down the hatch it goes (idk what kinda meth it would be yet, its up to interpretation) and well one time turns into two snd two to three three to four four to BEGGING for more meth

basically ace is using meth to control snake.. and it works very well lol. no one else in the gang knows for awhile (he def planned on doing the same to them) even when snake starts getting aggressive (to the gang and to victims), or when he stars scratching like crazy, even when he kinda just stops talking to them (excluding ace obvs) -GRUBBER is the first to realize!! AFTER snake starts convulsing on the floor bc ace gave him a bit to much "pbbbht" "pff whaddya mean? snakes fine he dont need no hospital" newsflash yes he did and after a lot of convincing they took him and the doctors called them heros bc snake almost died! shock all around everyone's a lil emotionally scarred

anyway snakes fine hes out thehospital and hes okay! the end :)

jk, hes back to begging ace for more meth. but surely ace learned by now? nope, he gives snake more and its back to the hospital. NOW he knows better? again no he plans to give snake more meth when he gets out but now the gang knows and theyre all scared hes gonna die so ace decides he'll just stop (this is bad, very bad. ace is.. yk the rest)

snakes back again!! he wants more meth and ace is like "no" so snake freaks and practically tears the shack apart looking for the meth (that ace hid), when he doesnt find it he almost nearly beats ace up but the guys hold him back and THAT!!! THAT VERY MOMENT is where ace finally realizes what hes done was really shitty. so now what? how does he fix it? lock snake in a room bc they cant afford rehab. im so dead ass and im sorry

they just leave him in a room that locks from the outside only and feed him every so often (not too often bc he doesnt want food just meth) and this lasts for a month at most. like they have a whole system and everything so he doesnt escape, ONE PERSON stays near his room always like they can still do their things but they cant leave the shack when its their turn

back to "this lasts for a month at most" yeah it failed eventually because for a while snake is just so out of it he just sort of sat there and asked for stuff (mostly meth) for a bit, but as his clarity comes back more and more he starts scheming (uh oh thats how we got here) so he waits till its arturo's turn to watch him then he pull an ace

basically he lies to arturo and tricks letting him out and giving him meth "imss gonna burnss it all, destroy it ssso we can putss thiss behind uss pal" (oh yeah arturo knows where ace hides it bc he watched ace do it once, so yeah whomp whomp)

anyway snake obvs inst gonna burn it all but arturo is convinced and helps him and snake leaves

JFUEHFUHFKUWE i didnt realizehow much i wrote until now (AND THERES MORE) so ill make another post!! mostly so ur pretty orbs dont hurt

uhhh bye

#meth snake #btw if anyone has ideas for this #POST ABT IT PLS I WOULD LOVE TO SEE IT (the tag is ofc meth snake)#i run an au now #little me would be proud #this one has darker(eh) themes be warned #still silly #is tumblr gonna be okay with how many times i said meth?

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pansyfemme · 1 year

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hello jude!!! do you have tips on collecting/wearing accessories if you can’t commit to going full decora (/another subculture)? i want to dress cooler but i always stop accessorizing after like. earrings. i’m not really sure how to start

hi! thx for asking- im gonna start by saying- theres absolutly no need to commit to decora if you want to try it out, its not a fashion you need to consistantly do when you start doing it (as well as it being pretty common amongst jfashion wearers to be part of multiple subcultures) but like. in general.

i think "collecting" is def the keyword. Everytime you go somewhere that sells cheap colorful things- keep an eye out. Thrift stores, Dollar stores, Flea markets.. etc. Also don't be afraid to diy! one of the first things i did was buy a 5$ pack of like. 200 plain barettes and some superglue and went thru my old toys to see if i had anything small enough to turn into a hairclip, earrings, necklaces.. etc. obviously not everywhere has this but ive noticed them popping up around the USA lately- but theres a 'creative reuse' store near me (which is basically. a place that sells secondhand art supplies and junk that could be recycled into new art for very very cheap, i usually spend under 5 bucks there and leave with a ton of stuff.) In terms of like- online places to find accesories, i search "toddler hair clips" on etsy pretty often as well as the usual mishmosh of terms like "kawaii" "rainbow" "decora" or "fairy kei" to find cute handmade accesories- but watch out for aliexpress resellers, there are more than u think on etsy. Even like. handmade looking stuff can be a reseller so keep a watchful eye open. Theres also a lot of people who buy big packs of charms for very cheap and glue them on barettes which is fine- but you can do that yourself, so don't bother. I only look at etsy when I want to specifically find high quality, handmade clips so i tend to get ones made of resin, clay or fabric- but since these are usually pretty expensive, if you want to do an effect like the standard decora mess of clips on top of clips- you're also going to need to look into cheaper options to fill the space. This is where most decora kids go to sites like aliexpress, amazon, wish, shein.. etc. you don't have to, it's totally possible to wear decora and similar styles buying exclusivly from small businesses, but it's generally what keeps the cost of wearing styles like decora reasonable. I try to keep a balance of small business made, DIY, and mass produced accesories on, personally. Decora does not have to be an expensive style, nor does any jfashion- but every style has its compromises. Moving on- when buying accesories outside of clips- i have less tips but still important ones. When buying necklaces, get ones of differing lengths. Layering necklaces are a lot more visually intresting when they're equally visable, and having different lengths helps them to not hide behind eachother. If you're intrested in kandi-as many coloful styles have it as a staple, it's fun, but it becomes kinda of a hobby of its own (and pony beads are more expensive than u think when you start making bigger cuffs- they use a LOT of beads.) also, kandi gets uncomfortable quick. Arm warmers are so underated and i love them, they're super cozy and look really cute. as for rings- i don't wear or have many personally, since im a visual artist and they really get in the way of my flow, i can't work with them on. (also. if you look at plastic colorful rings online, they're almost certinly for kids, even if the listing doesn't say so. you won't be able to fit them. if the listing doesnt specifically say adult or gives ring sizes, don't buy them.)

As for wearing- i gave some tips on other accesories, but im super specific about how i layer hair clips so ill say the best i can. I don't have bangs currently, (my hair isn't straight and ive never rlly found a way to style them since combing my hair looks rlly bad) but theres a reason most decora kids with straight hair have them- it's literally a flat plane to fit clips on. Otherwise, you're going to need to find a way to balance your clips and your hair in a way that looks cute, but also fits as many clips as possible (if that's what you're going for.) I tend to use like. three subcatagories of clips in the way i do it, i call them "Statement Clips" (Large clips, fabric clips, anything really flashy, tend to be heavy.) "Stabilility clips" (Medium sized, Lotsa barettes and bobby pins) and "Filler Clips" (Small. Butterfly Clips, anything that can fit into small gaps) If you can't tell already, i start by putting on clips to stabalize the area. Clips are heavy, and if you have a hair type that responds more to gravity than others, you're going to need to work against it. The point of stabalizing the area for me is to create like. a plane to put clips on. then, i tend to move on to the showier clips to create a visual effect, and fill the gaps with small ones. it's not too time consuming, it usually takes me 15 min or less.

A tip i give like. most decora kids out there. is 1) even in a style like decora, colors can clash- hence why i avoid blacks and browns when im doing a rainbow look. It's personal prefrence, but if you don't have a lot of accesories, you don't have to wear every one you own if you feel they won't go, even if it means less accesories. 2) decora as a style is stronger when your base outfit is as layered and colorful as your accesories. it's another investment, yes, but wearing decora accesories with a black hoodie and grey sweatpants won't nessecarily make that a decora outfit, if you get what i mean. im saying these as someone who did both when i was first getting into it.

i hope these help a little!! im sorry it took me a bit to respond ive been like. working on finals constantly and been on here mostly to just browse or update the queue so!

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irregulardiaryposts · 2 months

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20:40 07/03/2024

okay wow well its been well over two years since i updated this 'diary' blog lol

so weird seeing all those old posts about being a teenager with existential thoughts lol i dont really think like that anymore, at least not so much. i guess an update is in order then lmao okay so im in my 3rd year of uni now and im doing my year abroad! doing it in a small city in spain and i really quite like my job, ive only got 14hrs, i have a 3 day weekend, the city is small so i can walk everywhere and this job really gives me a sense of purpose that ive been missing in my life. makes me really realise that university is NOT for me lmfao i was so depressed during my second year i probs went to like 20% of my classes loool. im pretty sure i mightve almost failed aswell but since the professors were doing a marking boycott they released grades without marking the final exam and so since i was already doing well enough in all my classes i passed! quite lucky i think cos i wouldve been so entirely embarrassed and ashamed if i had to repeat a year cos of mental health. i think things are better here tho my issues havent disappeard completely like eg i have these evening classes 6-7.40pm tuesdays and thursdays and for the past like month i havent attended :/ at first it was cos i was sick (i think it was covid lol either from glasgow or on the plane back idk) and then i just didnt go back to class. i think my main excuse is that that is dinner time for me and i dont wanna move dinner time lol. but also i think the class itself is just not for me i dont feel like i learn a whoooole lot while im there and learning on apps is easier for me? but i always felt better for going to the classes cos i was like ha! im not depressed would a depressed person do this!? but of course depression doesnt work like that and i think i need medicated ! but that seems too scary to say. but at least i found someone to do a language exchange with! ive only had one hour with her in spanish, which was yesterday, but i already feel like ive improved lmaooo like i literally dreamt last night in a mix of spanish and english ahahahah cos when i think about it i literally have not ever regularly spoken spanish, ive only really spoken for activies in class or speaking exams so no wonder i have 0000 confidence in my speaking abilities but im hopeful that this will really improve my speaking :) about my job i guess- i work in a high school and i really enjoy interacting with the kids they really do make every day different and more interesting so i am grateful for them but sometimes damnnn sometimes i wanna jump out the window especially with this third year class they are the class KNOWN for being a bitof a pain lol and sometimes i have to lead the class by myself lmaooo mid u ik im 20 but i dont look it and they certainly dont treat me like an adult or a teacher and ngl they are a bit disrespectful at times but also what are u gonna do they are 14 and i have no proper teaching experience to help them by myself i can only hope that im actuallt helping them learn english lol. it is quite difficult tho with my scottish accent to try and sound as clear as possible because i pronounce almost 100% of the vowel sounds differently than rp english which is what i think they are used to so i have to realllyyyy annunciate all my words and man is it tiring lol.

what else. im going to madrid this weekend with bestie and im really looking forward to having a relaxing and fun time but i still havent packed my bags looooooool i alwyas do this tho and its fine not a big deal at all but i def need to do it tonight cos im leaving tomorrow immediately after work so ill have to have an actual breakfast and take snacks with me. im really enjoying my time in spain or at least im trying to but i feel like i have pushed myself enough out my comfort zone to be able to look back on this and say yeah i really took advantage of that. like i think i need to be more personable (is that a word yes it is i used it right) in teaching and be more interactive with them and stuff also i feel like i shoulve arranged a language exchange sooner cos i think this will really help, and i need to interact more with the other assistant but the thing is is im just not a sociable personnnnnnn aghgh. any way cutting this short cos i need to pack my bags for my trupppppp

#not using the tagging system i did on other posts i dont think theyre ever likely to be useful lmao

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pinkseas · 1 year

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[parasocial bestie] to both responses on ur wip fics; i'm not a writer myself, like in a fic way altho i pour my brainrots out in a narrative way its a Mess, but i get what you mean!! it does feel like the more you stretch a story out there's bound to be a lot of loose ends and gaps you need to fill since you basically expanded it. in a way its how it is with drawing when you do big Big projects, having too much blank spaces over your main subjects without a decent background of the piece can get Annoying.

"i have my overall goal and less of an idea of how to reach it" OKAY BUT PERSONALLY? not even gonna relate genshin than my own original stories i always have this problem and still do, like. having a Beginning and End but literally almost no middle bc theres SO MUCH TO FILL and you have to think how it progresses chronologically And logically how it reaches the ending you imagined. it felt easy, it felt nice and 'complete', until you think of the middle and thats how i have stories that never finishes itself and stick to just throwing ideas around but unsure to put it as its canon or not o)-( so yeah!! the closest i can understand of a Process especially to long narratives.

ANYWAY THE,.... THE LUMINE ZHONGI @XIAO LYRICS,.... when hte,... when the UHUHUHUHUHUHSUHGUFHGUHUGSUDHFSKFHSKDJH

oh. yeah. i realized i did sorta sent a Bunch of brainrot BUT LIKE PREE MUCH EVERYTHGIN I HAD RELATED TO UM,.. AKFJHD THE XIAO DYING ONE OOPS cus,..... becus ughuhfjfdhgk its like a Big fav for me and am curious (and now i am a lil embarrassed JKAFHSDKFJH) and anyways i have a lot of Impulsive Brainrot Showers,....... scattered in that big one i told u cus of the Potential,....

also ill have u know during the recovery after xiao woke he can be a little cold bc the incident rlly shot down his physical constitution to nature so lumine covers him in a lil blanket over his shoulders that he can walk around with and that imagery is probably an Icon that represents the whole brainrot in general. blanket taco burrito xiao i think. anyway lumine got bored and did crochet, taught xiao how since its easier than knitting that thoma taught her, and the guy spent hours continuously crochetting a sheet like probably miles long till late at night bc lumine forgot teach him how to End the stitching. sweet lovely dumbass <3333

yes yes the expansion and more gaps to fill !!! that def makes sense with art too we are shaking hands rn... and idk when you have the filler/details planned beforehand it can be SO fun but when youre struggling to fill in the gaps. well. Fawk

admittedly cannot relate too too much with having a beginning and end, 80% of the time when i write i start from the middle there's just So Much Middle and then i dont know what goes where or how to connect it or what to make the beginning or end and and. explodes. actually tbf i have a solid beginning idea for both current wips and a half-decent ending for one of them but god help me figure out how the FUCK im gonna end the xiaolumi one i havent even thought about it yet it could honestly go on forever <- my worst nightmare.... stories that are never finished my BELOATHED i definitely get that god we are shaking hands once more

THAT'S ONE OF MY RLY OLD FAVORITE SONGS ITS SOOOOOOOOOOOO. xiao when he sees himself as an object or a tool or a weapon or something horrible but never really a Person and the song captures that so well when you think of him and the uckfingfg.f the fuckifngfg.

explodes and dies

THE XIAO DYING ONE GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD hold on finishing responding to this first

cold man with a blanket over his shoulders what if i Cried. that is so perfect in every way shape and form dear LORD. and lumi teaching him crochet and forgetting to teach him how to end the stitching is both so cute and so fucking funny dear lord this poor man sitting there for hours going on and on and on........

XIAO ALMOST DYING. GOD.

i have too many thoughts on death and near death and grief. something about xiao not allowing himself to grieve or process that he'd really been dead for a moment there because he survived, it's in the past, what is there to worry about? what is there to think of? it doesnt matter anymore. lumine struggling to come to terms with how close it was, constantly pushing back the what-ifs, if she'd been sooner if she'd been later if she hadn't been able to help him the way she did if zhongli hadn't come if if if if. zhongli, so accustomed to deaths of those so dear to him and moving forward from it, still shaken to the core because no matter how many times it happens you never really get used to it. it doesnt ever get easier. similar to xiao, telling himself over and over that it doesnt matter, all that matters is that xiao is okay, there's no need to grieve or be upset when he's alright. it's pointless.

lumine (and paimon) (and probably also venti lbr) bonking them both on the head because its important to process your emotions, because the fact that xiao isnt dead doesn't just magically get rid of the fear and the grief that the situation created. yes we Are talking about our feelings you stupid fucks ignoring the elephant in the room will not make the elephant in the room disappear. ignoring your feelings will not make them vanish it will only allow them to fester and grow stronger and more destructive!!!!

you'd think that people who've been alive for thousands of years wouldve learned how to express themselves by now but lumine and venti have to really push them through it.

and idk. just. the physical repercussions and what that means for him mentally. the intense feelings of self hate and uselessness amplified by being stuck in bed, amplified by being unable to move and fight and function the way he used to, having to relearn such "basic" things. he would be SO hard on himself about it. he should be better than this, he shouldve avoided it, it never shouldve happened in the first place, he should be recovering faster (nevermind that he is recovering exceptionally quickly in the first place, all things considered. just adepti things). and working through all of that, working through the frustration and the helplessness, being shown endless patience and love and care through it all, i just. mmmmmmmmmmmmmgmnfmngmfngmfdgnmg fuck.

finding himself useful and kept around and maybe even cared for as a tool vs being very suddenly forced to face the reality that even when he cannot fulfill his duty, even when he cant fight, even when he has no "use" and cant fulfill what he sees as his purpose- he's alive. he's cared for. he's loved and learning and moving forward regardless.

#im going to explode #parasocial bestie tag

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dateamonster · 3 years

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if anyones curious, heres a big ol list of anime horror ive enjoyed that dont revolve entirely around cute children being harmed for shock:

paranoia agent: an awesome single-season show thats perfect to binge-watch imo. it follows the interwoven stories of several victims of the phantom figure known as shonen bat who takes the form of a child in rollerskates and attacks strangers with his beat up baseball bat. the only thing that seems to connect these victims is that they are visited by him in a moment of absolute desperation, and somehow their lives seem to improve after being attacked. to say anything else would ruin the mystery. give it a shot. this series owns and the intro music is iconic.

perfect blue: i feel like everyone who likes animated horror already knows about perfect blue but if not, you absolutely should. a suspense heavy, brain-breaking thriller about an ex-pop-idol who quits to become an actress, only to be haunted by a mirror version of herself who is less than happy with her decision. her grasp on reality starts to slip as the pressures of her new job and a string of violent murders slowly chip away at her sanity. definitely mind the content warnings for this one.

yamishibai: an anthology series of short scary stories presented with fun, simplistic animation. every episode is fairly short iirc so its very easy to just plow through the whole series. especially good if ur the type to enjoy a classic ghost story.

serial experiments lain: sort of hard to explain. this is another like Classic. it is about a highschool girl so i am sort of breaking my own rules here but like the vibe is entirely different then what you might expect. its a trippy, deeply weird series from 1998 about the ways technology may begin to encroach on our lives and shape our identity. i really love older media that speculates about the ways our relationship with tech might develop in the future. if you like scifi and psychological aspects to your horror, you will probably like this.

pet shop of horrors: i havent actually seen the anime so i dont know how well it holds up but i was obsessed with the manga as a Youth and id recommend at least giving the series a look. anthology-like with a connecting thread of a spooky pet shop where rare exotic and sometimes deadly creatures are sold.

lily c.a.t.: its alien except its not. scifi horror about the crew and passengers of a spaceship whos interstellar journey is thrown off course by a shape-shifting alien invader. literally if you like alien or the thing or anything like that, this is that but animated. i think the strongest thing about this one isnt necessarily the horror of the alien itself but the horror of being stranded, far from home and trapped in a confined space with a bunch of near strangers and a massive yawning void just outside your window. there are some moments in lily cat that just made me think about how huge and unforgiving not only space but the passage of time is and im honestly still a little freaked.

akira: i mean, obviously. i dont know what i could say about this that hasnt already been said except this is the movie that made me start getting into body horror. its beautiful, its horrific, its a fucking staple of dystopia fiction. i guess you could argue its more scifi/action than traditional horror in a lot of ways, but some of the stuff near the end (that i def saw when i was too young to be watching this) taught me a whole new definition of fear so. do with that what u will i guess.

there are a couple more i cant remember the names of right now so ill come back to this if my brain ever decides to start working again. almost all of these contain some really heavy subjects so be careful and seek out content warnings if you need to.

also i dont really care about subs vs dubs arguments but a lot of these are on the slightly older side and as a result some of the english voice acting work is... not great. either way do what feels right to you just keep that in mind.

#horror #recs #recommendations #anime

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sluttbuttsstuff · 3 years

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Hucow!AU Part 5 (FINALE!!!)

WOOHOO!! It’s finally Bruno’s turn, I saved best boy for last. All parts combined in gdocs are 29 pages total, this is def the longest thing i’ve written in over a decade!! I hope you enjoy, and look forward to whatever i decide to write next

thanks, and enjoy!

as always. credit goes to @dark-side-blog2 for the wonderful hucow! au

WARNINGS: not sfw, yandere, duncon, noncon, sleep fucking, force feeding, manipulation, dark themes, afab reader, she/her pronouns, all characters 18+!!

After taking care of Narancia and tucking him into bed, Bruno returned to your room once more. You slept like the dead, worn out from a long night. Bruno smiled proudly, you had been wonderful for them. Each bull, you had accepted their love, their passion, their essence and earned your place in the herd once again. It filled Bruno with such joy, knowing that you were the perfect mate for them, for all of them.

You were caring and kind for Narancia, playful and fun for Mista, calming and gentle for Fugo, accepting and attentive for Abbacchio. And for Bruno: you were everything. For so long, there had been a piece of the puzzle missing in his life. He had a family with no mother, no children.

Bruno had met you first in a very dark part of his life-his herd was beaten, driven from his home in fear, on the brink of death with no hope. And then, you had appeared, an angel hidden away in paradise, offering safety, shelter. Much more than that, even, with a little bit of convincing, and a lot of planning. He would have his family, his children, and you.

Bruno knew how to play the long game, how to strategize and manipulate, but he only did it for good reason. He had to, you were too prideful, too stubborn to realize how much you needed him. You were running a giant farm several acres large by yourself, no employees, relatives or neighbors to help. Bruno couldn’t have that,now could he? He and the other bulls took over the hard work and heavy lifting-eventually, after a lot of hemming and hawing from you. Bruno managed to talk you into it; it was beneficial for both of you, a way for the bulls to earn their keep and for you to get some help.

The bulls helped with Bruno’s plan as well, in their own ways. Mista put his cooking skills to use, making you healthy meals infused with lackweed (Mulgeo, a plant that encouraged your body to lactate) and pills that increased your sexual urges. He’d even been adding charcoal to your meals to cancel out your birth control; it wasn’t necessary, Bruno had gotten rid of your birth control months ago while you were asleep, but Bruno appreciated it nonetheless.

Narancia had gotten you to warm up to them very quickly, being as innocent and naive as he was, and Bruno was able to use him to display his parenting skills. Yes, Narancia was a grown bull, and mostly treated as such, but he was still the youngest, and hard not to spoil. Plus, the way you seemed to light up when Bruno would baby Narancia- it was clear your maternal instincts were awakening. Good! It was excellent practice for your own children.

Fugo was admittedly the most awkward around you, it wasn’t really his fault, though. He had the least experience out of the bulls with women, but Bruno could tell his true feelings about you. So, he encouraged Fugo to show his strengths to you; mainly his brain. There was an old tractor collecting rust that needed repairs, and you had lost several crops last season due to lack of irrigation. Fugo was able to repair them, thanks to researching some books and some help from you. Plus, it was one less job for you to do, and another reason for you to depend on them. Bruno knew Fugo was nervous, but Bruno was certain he’d be a good mate and husband. He would make their children very smart.

Abbacchio could be a little rough around the edges, it's true, but he clearly had a soft spot for you. While he would smack Mista and Narancia around when they got on his nerves or got ornery, you he respected and let a lot slide. Bruno had seen you tug on his tail (admittedly by accident) , elbow him (after a funny joke), and even put flowers (that he was allergic to!) in his hair! Abbacchio had taken it in stride, and even defended you when Mista’s teasing or the other shenanigans went too far. Plus, Abbacchio’s skills as a lockpick let them sneak into your house when you were away or sleeping. Very useful indeed…

Bruno knew he had to share you, as much as he wanted you for his own. He couldn’t hurt his herd, his brothers, who loved you almost as much as he did. So Bruno was patient, he let them have their turns first, keep the peace….

But Bruno couldn’t wait any longer.

The timing had to be perfect, to ensure he had the best chances. He had snuck into your home months before, stealing and disposing of your birth control, and destroying your refill prescription. Thankfully you were too busy and preoccupied to make a new appointment with the doctor for new medication, which Bruno appreciated greatly. Digging through your trash, he was able to record and determine your cycle, in order to find out when you would be most fertile. He would allow his herd many things,including you.

But his child would be first.

Letting the others go first- he allowed it before you were truly in heat. They didn’t know why, but were grateful nonetheless, eager to claim you.

He pulled back your blankets, after making sure you were deep in R.E.M. sleep. Birds started chirping as dawn rose outside, but you were dead to the world. So much, in fact, that when Bruno pulled back your bed sheets you didn’t so much as flinch. You were still nude, too tired to put your pajamas back on last night; Bruno admired the early morning light glowing on your body. Bruno kissed down your face and body everywhere the sun touched, relieved you were still asleep. Bruno made note of every bruise and marking on your skin to treat later that morning, as he went lower and lower down your body. Spreading your legs, you tasted divine. You were definitely ready, too: now would be his best chance.

Licking the others out of your core, he heard you quietly whimper- he paused, waiting for you to stir, but you eventually drifted back to sleep. You always were cute when you slept, the way you would sometimes talk in your sleep or kick your legs “Running.” Bruno had learned a lot observing you, and intended to learn a lot more from you today. He cleaned you out with his tongue and prepped you thoroughly-maybe it was petty of him, saving you all for himself, but Bruno was the alpha bull, and the perfect mate for you. That’s why it was so important to not just get you pregnant, but pregnant with his children. It’s what you, the both of you deserved.

Once Bruno was certain you were ready ( you were still soft and wet from last night, and pleasantly warm against his tongue and fingers) he leaned over you, pulling your legs up against his shoulders into a mating press. It terrified him how easily you slept, how dangerous it would be if his herd hadn’t found you. What if someone else had found you before them, taken you like this in your sleep? It worried him so, that’s why he had to do this, claim you and protect you from any rivals.

Bruno stroked your cheek, before pressing inside. Finally, after all this time, he was inside of you, warm and wonderful and all his. You squirmed in your sleep,but otherwise accepted him without complaint. Bruno was so happy he could cry, he settled for kissing your shoulder as he pushed into the hilt. Bruno couldn’t hold his urges back any longer, he thrust into you again and again, hitting against your sweet spot. You cried out in your sleep, jumbled noises Bruno convinced himself were his name. In this position, he was able to reach so deep, force himself as far inside as he could reach.

His grip on you tightened, feeling the strain of the position, the slap of his balls on your ass fueling his desire more. But it wasn’t enough, he had to make sure you felt good too. He suckled your chest, licking your nipples the way he had seen you enjoy. Your pussy was so wet he was able to rub slick onto your hard throbbing clit, careful to rub the raw skin gently.

“Y/n, I’m so thankful to have found you, finally we can make our dreams come true~” Bruno whispered to you, desperate for you to know the feelings he’d held back for so long.

“I can hardly hold back with you; I’ve been waiting so long for this, and I can tell now that so have you. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you, we all will. Just give in, you can trust me.” Bruno pleaded, close to the edge. Bruno grit his teeth, it was about to end, all too soon. Bruno wasn’t ready, he wanted to stay like this with you forever. Relief washed over Bruno as he heard you cry out in release, tightening around him and bringing him to release.

“I’m cumming, y/n. Please, accept all of me!” He gasped,spilling his seed inside. Tears Bruno had held back spilled down as his emotions overcame him, something he would only allow to happen while you couldn’t see. He was certain this was the right thing to do, now more than ever. You were his, all of theirs, safe and protected.

In the next months, you would become full with child. Naturally, you would have to stop manual labor-which would be fine, you could depend on your sturdy bulls to run the farm for you. And then when you had their children, you would need to raise them. Obviously, you had five capable mates to help you; taking turns feeding them, staying up on long sleepless nights, teaching them right from wrong. So many precious memories to be made with you, Bruno could

hardly wait.

As Bruno turned to leave you to rest, he saw you start to rise.

“...Bruno?” You called weakly, and Bruno was by your side in an instant.

“Y/n? What’s wrong, you’re up so early?” Bruno asked, concerned.

“...It’s hot” you groaned, reaching out for him. Bruno’s heart fluttered, you called out for him. He felt your forehead; admittedly sweaty, but not necessarily from illness.

“You are a little warm. Let’s get you out of these sweaty blankets and cleaned up.” Bruno helped you out of your sheets, and ran to get a damp washcloth. He returned quickly, sitting on your bed and wiped the cloth over your body. Your body flushed, and whenever you thought Bruno wasn’t looking, you would glance over at him. Bruno smiled to himself, you really were spoiling him this morning-he couldn’t be more delighted.

“Are you feeling any better? You should take it easy today, you had a long night.” Bruno said as he washed your stomach.

“Umm, yes, im-ahh!” You jumped, as Bruno’s wash cloth reached your nether regions.

“Relax, bella, It’s important to clean this area as well. We don’t want you getting sick now do we?” Bruno continued, unfazed by your reaction. You fidgeted a moment longer, but considering all that had happened, you relented. What more could Bruno do to you?

He toweled you off quickly, patting you dry and then headed to your closet.

“Let’s find you something extra comfortable to wear today, shall we?” Bruno asked, flipping through your hangers. What a shame, most of your outfits were utilitarian and industrial, not befitting a mother to be.

“Oh, Bruno, you don’t have to-” You began, but Bruno cut you off.

“Here we go, perfect! Ah, and this shade of lavender will look lovely on you!” Bruno proclaimed, holding up a flowery sundress made of soft cotton. Very comfortable, but not the best for farm work. Bruno couldn’t be stopped though, grabbing some undergarments for you (how did he know where you kept them?) and helped you sit up in bed.

“Let’s get you dressed, as much as I love the thought of having you nude all day, nothing will get done around the farm with the boys fawning over you.” Bruno chuckled, sliding socks onto your feet for you.

“Bruno, please! I can dress myself!” You pleaded, trying to pull away, but Bruno stopped you with gentle but firm hands.

“Bella, please-let me take care of you the way you’ve taken care of us. It’s only fair, isn’t it?” Bruno smiled, tugging your socks up to your ankles. He held a white pair of panties out for you, “Step in, dear, one foot at a time” You groaned, turning an adorable shade of red Bruno loved, but did indeed let him slide the panties up and onto you. He convinced you to skip a bra today (Bruno wasn’t completely selfless) and slip into the sundress, snug as a bug.

“Much better! Now, do you want to see if you can get some more sleep? You didn’t get many hours of sleep last night, and your body must be very sore.” He asked you, stroking your cheek. “Well, maybe later, but-” You began, only to be interrupted by your growling stomach. Bruno chuckled, “Ahh, of course, let’s get you fed shall we?” he winked, placing a hand on the small of your back and escorting you to the kitchen.

You tried to make yourself breakfast, really you did, but Bruno wasn’t giving you any leeway this morning.

“Please, Bambina, let me cook for you. You always make the rest of us meals, and I’m not completely hopeless in the kitchen.” He told you, sitting you on a kitchen chair, rolling up his sleeves. True to his word, he was decent in the kitchen-more than decent, in fact. Bruno fried up a pig’s worth of bacon, crispy and fried with a sprinkle of cinnamon. Eggs, sunny-side scrambled and over-easy, just a little bit runny and fresh from your henhouse. And the cru-de-ta, a mountain-pile of fluffy home batter pancakes, smothered in homemade syrup and creamy smooth butter dollops piled on top. Bruno piled your plate to the brim, sure to give you only the crunchiest bacon strips and roundest pancakes, with plenty left over for the boys. It was a miracle the other boys hadn’t woken up yet, but you supposed they were still wiped out from the night before and needed a little more rest.

Bruno didn’t mind one bit, enjoying the one on one time with you he rarely got. Sitting patiently for him like a good mate, letting him clean you, dress you, even feed you. Bruno was determined to spoil you, so you would never want for anything other than him again. Looking around your plate, you asked Bruno, “Sorry, but you forgot to grab a fork and knife. Would you mind?”

Bruno smiled, unblinkingly, “Oh no, I didn’t. Open wide~” He cooed, stacking a silver fork full of your breakfast. You looked at him incredulously, “Seriously?”

Bruno didn’t relent, smile unwavering, “You wouldn’t turn down all my hard work and this delicious food, would you?”

You wanted to argue with him, you really did. For every inch he gave you, he took a mile, and it was starting to be humiliating. But for whatever reason, Bruno always made you cave. Besides, after everything you’d been through, he’d never hurt you, always gentle and caring. So, against your better judgement, you sheepishly opened your mouth for him.

Bruno lifted the fork into your mouth, watching your lips close around his fork. You savored the buttery rich flavor of the pancakes, the spongy texture bouncing lightly in your mouth as you chewed. To say it was delicious would be an understatement; you were starting to consider letting Mista and Bruno handle mealtime more often. Bruno bit the corner of his lip, watching you eat your meal. You wanted to pout, not give Bruno the satisfaction of knowing you enjoyed being babied like this, but you couldn’t help smiling as you swallowed bite after bite, opening your mouth and even leaning forward. Each bite was better than the last; the salty sweet bacon grease and runny eggs soaked into the pancakes, soaking up the flavor medley and sending your palette into overdrive.

Bruno loved every minute, watching you let your guard down for him, licking up syrup from your chin, even letting him wipe your cheek clean with a napkin. Your stomach puffed out as you ate through your meal, it excited him to know he did that to you, and that your stomach would soon be even more distended and full with his baby. Your plate was nearly clean, but you didn’t think you could eat another bite. Bruno had given you so much already, and it was all delicious and rich, and had no more room.

“Please, Bruno, I’m full to the brim. I’m sorry but I can’t eat anymore.” You groaned, clutching your stomach.

“Oh please, just another bite, bambina~ you’ve done so well, you’re almost done.” He cooed, forking the last bits on your plate. You tried to excuse yourself, but Bruno stuffed it into your open unsuspecting mouth. You nearly choked on the utensil forcing your way into your mouth, a sugary syrupy mess that was starting to nauseate you. It was too much, too rich, but Bruno held your mouth shut.

“Please, y/n, you have to eat more. Think of our children, won’t you?” You froze, as you remembered everything that had happened last night with a wave. You looked at Bruno, mouth still full and ready to vomit. His gaze tore into you, more serious than he had been all morning. In fact, the last time he looked at you like that…

Bruno rubbed your back, as your eyes watered and spilled over. Poor thing, were you already having morning sickness? No worries, it was only natural; he would take care of you. You were having trouble breathing, not sure if it was the food or the panic setting in.

“Come on Bambina, you’re almost done. Just swallow it all down, you can do it~” Bruno hissed, as he plugged up your nose. Bruno sighed, watching your eyes bug out; he didn’t want to be harsh with you, but what other choice were you giving him? You needed to follow his orders, that’s how he kept you safe and happy. “Now, y/n”

Despite the lump in your throat, you had no choice but to swallow, the lack of oxygen making you gag. How could you forget who you were dealing with? How could you let him take advantage of you again and again? You wiped the snot and tears from your face, catching your breath. You flinched as a familiar hand reached out and grabbed your chin. Bruno turned you to look at him, his face calm and smiling as if nothing had happened.

“There, Bambina, that wasn’t so bad was it? You have to let me take care of you, okay? We don’t want you hurting yourself do we?” He asked, voice soft and patronizing, like he hadn’t just force fed you against your will. You wanted to run away, but didn’t know where to go. It didn’t help any as you heard footsteps coming down the stairs.

“Yo, y/n! You’re up already? I thought we wiped you out last night!”

“Guess we’ll have to try harder next time.”

“Are you okay, y/n? You look ill. Maybe you should go back to bed.”

“Ohh, it smells so good! Did you make breakfast for us, y/n?”

You were surrounded. No way out. Five strong angry bulls that had taken over your life, your home, even your body. You couldn’t trust them, not any of them. There was no escape.

“What’s wrong, bella? Are you crying?”

“Don’t cry, y/n! There’s nothing to worry about, we’ll take care of you!”

“You can count on us, y/n. We’re mates, after all.”

You were trapped.

Trapped.

You opened your mouth to scream, but it was no use.

It’s not like anyone would hear you, anyways

END

#sluttbuttsstuff #fic #not sfw #hucow!au #yandere #bruno #brunoxreader

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jinkicake · 4 years

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You Fuckface!

Kuroo, Oikawa, Tendou with a seemingly cute and innocent s/o but when they start dating they realize that their s/o frequently cusses, is dirty minded, and kinky.

Kuroo Testurou x Reader

Oikawa Tooru x Reader

Tendou Satori x Reader

Anon, I’m really sorry that this took so long!! Also sorry bc I kinda went off on Oikawa’s version..... LOL I have been up all night crying over Junmyeon enlisting, I need a moment.

Kinda smutty

WC- 2,131

~~~

Kuroo Testurou

Kuroo would be so surprised how you change when you become comfortable enough around him

It’d make him really happy that you feel that relaxed with him that you don’t have to keep up a front

For Kuroo to fall for such a sweet girl who also happens to be into all the freaky shit he’s into… he’ll be so excited

Sign him up

Listen, we all know Kuroo is the biggest dork but he also has such a flirty nature

He just emits passion and confidence, it’s his scorpio tendencies that make him so sexc

He’d be really entertained with your personality, finding it humorous whenever a swear word leaves your mouth

When he finds out about your kinks, how rough you want to be manhandled, his eyes will darken and he’ll tease you about it just to hide how turned on he is

Kuroo lives for when you swear at him, calling him random things like ‘fuckface’ or ‘shit lips’

He thinks it's hot

He’d def be the type to tease you about your ‘front’, jokingly saying inappropriate things in class just to see your reaction

The way you’d pretend to be shocked and act like you don’t know what he is talking about when your classmates look at the two of you, and then how you’d narrow your eyes at him and glare when they look away

He lives for that

Kuroo loves to see you blush, he will do absolutely ridiculous things just to see you flustered

He is a fool in love, can we blame him?

“Oh? What’s this?” Kuroo asks playfully, peering over your shoulder out of nowhere as you scroll through twitter. Before you can even notice him he grabs your phone and watches, with an amused smile, the gif you were looking at. “Shit, you’re into that kitten?”

You can tell he is trying to tease you but the way his voice lowered and his eyes darkened made your insides melt. Kuroo glances back at the phone and watches the screen all over again.

“You want me to spank your ass cherry red?” His voice is so teasing and sinful, it’s not fair, you can only whimper in response before you try to protest.

“T-that’s not mine.” You weakly try to grab your phone back but Kuroo simply grabs your wrist with his large hand. “Someone retweeted it and I was scrolling past it.” You lie, straight through your teeth, and Kuroo doesn’t believe you in the slightest.

“You’re saying you don’t want to be bent over my knee, marked by my hand over and over?” He lowers his face down to yours and you close your eyes to hide from his heated gaze. “You don’t want me to tie you up with your ass in the air and have my way with you?”

You can’t even believe these words are coming out of Kuroo’s mouth, you want to revel in it. It’s too difficult to form words, not as one of his hands pressed against the small of your back and brings you closer to him, not as his nose runs along your jaw.

“Come on, tell me.” He gently pushes, kissing your cheek reassuringly. At this you finally open your eyes once more, your nerves are all on fire as you look over his face for any amusement. Kuroo looks deadly serious.

“Yes, I would like that.” You tell him, looking down at the floor as his hand tightens against your shirt.

“The sweet, innocent (Y/N) wants to play?” Kuroo teases and nips at your neck, gripping your hip with his other hand. “Let’s play then kitty, I’ll take good care of you."

Oikawa Tooru

Something about King Oikawa tells me that he would not be surprised in the slightest when he finds out what you’re actually like

He’d be able to see right through the front, even before the two of you start dating, which made you really intriguing to him

Every now and then your provocativeness would catch him by surprise, he was never prepared with how vulgar you can be

Oikawa likes it though, he especially likes it when you unconsciously act that way around Iwaizumi

The way his best friend gets flustered every time a curse leaves your lips, or whenever you say something out of pocket makes Oikawa wheeze

It’s one of the funniest things in the world to Oikawa and he laughs even harder every time you apologize to Iwaizumi, just as flustered as him

More often than not, you do catch Oikawa off guard with your language

Not that he’d ever tell you that

If you say something really vulgar he would just stare at you, his wide chocolate eyes would be like 0.o

Almost as if he didn’t believe you said it and then he’d flick your forehead and tell you to knock it off

But you can see the deep blush covering his face, he does a terrible job at hiding it

He’d love to listen to you swear, especially when pleasure is being ripped from your core, it adds flavor to the experience~~

To put it delicately, is Oikawa a prude? Yes and no, because he can be such a tease and curse around you when he feels like it and other times if you swear too loudly in public around adults he becomes a b00mer

Just remember he is a cancer and they’re known to be sensitive…

Either way, love Oikawa and appreciate him or fall ill to my sword~

“Are you ever going to tell Oikawa all the nasty things you tell me?” Your friend asks one random day during lunch, you tilt your head at her and can’t hide the confusion off your face. “Don’t play innocent with me (Y/N), I know you better than that.” She scoffs and you glance around the hallway to make sure it is completely empty.

“What the hell are you talking about fucker?” You scoff and cross your arms over your chest, waiting for her reply.

“Oh, I don’t know, maybe that you want him to eat you out for so long that you lose feeling in your legs.” She snaps, amusement twinkling in her eyes before she lists another secret. “Oh or maybe that you want him to choke the shit out of you till you pass out, that one had me a little worried.” She smiles sheepishly and your jaw drops in shock as you gape at her.

“I said those things at three in the morning, they don’t count!” You try to defend yourself, saying that the lack of sleep made you dickmatized.

“You still said them!” She laughs loudly, throwing her head back and you can only turn red at your secret confessions.

“M-maybe I’ll tell him one day, I can’t just be like ‘oh Tooru please spank me and then fuck my face’.” You pretend to beg, clasping your hands together and looking at your friend with puppy eyes, your voice raising several octaves.

“You’re a dumbass!” She wheezes and you purse your lips at her in retaliation. “We will continue this conversation another time, I have to go meet Makki in the library to work on our project.”

“Try not to make too much noise while you suck his dick this time!” You remind her and she rolls her eyes before flicking you off, you watch as she walks down the hallway before you turn back to your own classroom. You were walking past an empty room when a warm hand grabbed your wrist and pulled you inside, pinning you against the door. Your face sours when you see your boyfriend, looking like his usual charming self yet, there is something off as he stares down at you.

“O-Oikawa? Are you okay?” You ask nervously, your breath hitching when he leans down to nip at your neck.

“Were you ever going to tell me how much of a minx you are?” He asks, his voice rough, as he grabs a handful of your ass harshly.

“Fuck.” You whine and lean your head back against the door, realizing you weren’t as quiet as you thought you were. “How much did you hear?”

“All of it.” He pulls back to stand tall, towering over you to watch you cower underneath him. “How badly do you want it, baby? How much do your words mean?” He taunts and you gasp when you feel his clothed erection pressing against your stomach.

“I want you s-so badly Tooru.” You whimper and your boyfriend’s grin only widens.

“I know baby, I know and I’ll give it to you.”

Tendou Satori

Please, Tendou would have a field day with you

He has a dirty mind and probably swears just as much

He’d be so shocked, lowkey because he didn’t expect it, not like he’d tell you

But he would think it's really funny to listen to you swear or point out how the cloud is shaped like a dick

Tendou just seems to be amused by that

Unless you’re with his family, he’d probably have you refrain from swearing around them

Bootleg hisoka would not appreciate you saying ‘fuck’ when you meet his mother…

But other than that he loves it!!!

If you ever start cursing out of anger and you become out of breath, just know that you may have killed Tendou

He would become very, very, very turned on

He’d be such a cheeky little shit, tease you and say you need to put soap in your mouth

And by soap, he means his dick

“You have such a potty mouth, let’s get something to clean it~~~”

Tendou would probably tease you for hours on end just to hear you swear and wither at his touch

Tendou swearing turns you on just as much so whenever he finishes his fun, you hop on him and do the exact same thing to him, you tease him for hours just to watch him fall apart~

“What’s the difference between being horny and being hungry?” You ask your boyfriend and stare up at him from where you rest on his lap. Tendou glances away from his phone to look down at you, his eyes narrowing suspiciously. “Where you put the cucumber.”

Tendou watches as you struggle to hide your fits of laughter, your lips pressed together harshly.

“It wasn’t funny?” You pout up at him and he continues to stare at his phone. “Ah, fuck you bitch.” You push at his phone, the smile on your face makes him smile back down at you.

“You need to watch that mouth of yours.” Tendou teases and pinches the tip of your nose.

“Why?” You frown and narrow your eyes at him. “You don’t like it?” Tendou wants to reach down and kiss the pout from your lips but he instead he gently cups your cheeks.

“I think it’s hot.” He brushes his nose against yours and you smile at the interaction. “But you need to learn when you can and can’t say stuff like that.” Tendou’s voice lowers and you stiffen in his lap, nervously looking up at him. “Isn’t that right baby?”

“Yes.” You whisper and Tendou moves one of his hands from your cheeks down to rest on your throat, giving you a teasing squeeze.

“Yes what, darling?” The pressure from his fingers sends a lick of heat straight to your core and you almost shut your eyes in an attempt to savor it.

“Yes, d-daddy.” You whimper and shut your eyes, a few seconds of silence go by and you slowly open your eyes to see Tendou covering his mouth with his hand. When he looks down at you, his whole body falls back against the couch and the loudest laugh you’ve ever heard from him spews from his lips.

“Fuck, I-I’m sorry baby, I can’t.” Tendou wheezes through his tears, clutching his sides as the air leaves his lungs. You simply sit up and cross your arms over your chest, your face soured as you glare at him. “I’m still getting used to it.” He confesses, his entire face tilted red. It’s only been a few nights since you revealed the kink to your boyfriend and he has had a rather difficult time getting used to it.

“You suck!” You whine and poke his chest, turning away when he reaches out for you again.

“Don’t be mad baby, I still think you’re super fucking hot!” He tries to reassure you and you keep your deep rested frown. “Let me make it up to you!” You’re never one to deny Tendou of his offers so you simply turn your face back at him, allowing him to cup your cheeks once more. “That’s my good girl.” Tendou praises quietly before pressing his lips to yours.

#kuroo tetsuro x reader #oikawa toru x reader #tendou satori x reader #kuroo x reader #oikawa x reader #tendou x reader #haikyuu kuroo #haikyuu oikawa #haikyuu tendou #haikyuu fic #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you

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ruhrohimrorny · 4 years

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What Subjects I Think LOK Characters Would Teach:

Lin: PE, obviously. Dating Kya and all the kids are happy cause there’s a noticeable shift in Lin’s mood once they start dating. She no longer forces kids to run a mile every day and instead does it once a week now, so the kids are hoping her and Kya stay together. She also coaches Golf and Lacrosse.

Kya: Waffled between MILF Math teacher, MILF Science teacher, and hippy/chill Music teacher, but decided on MILF Science Teacher. Getting strong Biology vibes. Very fun labs and not strict at all. Her and Zhu-Li are super passionate about leading the Science Bowl team. Seeing these young people be so passionate about STEM and helping their fellow teammates makes her hopeful for this young generation.

Tenzin: He kinda gives math teacher vibes, but a large part of his character in the show is about him keeping his history alive, and teaching others abut learning and respecting history, so I feel like he’s a History teacher. His class is a lot of notetaking but he plays quiet music and does a five minute meditation in the middle of class to encourage kids to relax, so students really like him and actually listen to him. Also, he’s kind of gullible so they make up fake trends to tell him. He once spent a week addressing people as “brony” cause students told him thats what people say now instead of bro. Kids got a good laugh out of that one. Him and Pema are another favorite teacher couple.

Bumi II: Def gives off eccentric/unhinged English teacher vibes. Very interesting and informative conversations in his class, but things get off topic very quickly. Whenever kids ask about Bum-Ju, he gets distracted and will talk the entire rest of the period about what to dress Bum-Ju up as for Halloween. Probably plays a lot of videos. And students don’t worry about if they read the books Bumi II assigns cause they don’t think he’s even read the books he assigns. When having discussions about the books in class, sometimes kids will make up stuff and say it’s in the book and for the most part, Bumi II goes along with it cause he doesn’t know what actually happens in the books.

Varrick: Also gives off eccentric/unhinged English teacher vibes, but because he’s a businessman/war profiteer, I’m gonna have to say he teaches Econ and gives students lots of unsolicited financial advice. Also supervises the Engineering and Robotics Club.

Zhu-Li: Science teacher, probably Chemistry. She’s very good at explaining and getting kids to follow her instructions. Not only is she a co-supervisor for the Science Bowl team, she helps Varrick run Engineering and Robotics Club, cause if it were only Varrick running it, no kids would come. His intensity and eccentricity scares them.

Iroh II: He’s definitely the young Math teacher everyone has a crush on. Very chill and doesn’t give a lot of homework. Kids love when he shows pictures of his dog to the class and eventually he brings in the dog cause admin think the dog is too cute to say no to.

Tonraq: Resident DILF History teacher. Kind of a hardass but also a nice dude so most everyone passes his class. Probably that History teacher that is also a football coach, so during fall he doesn’t give a FUCK about whether anyone actually turns anything in. Him and Senna is the teacher couple that seems like opposites but actually are pretty similar and balance each other out.

Senna: That English teacher that every mentally ill student becomes emotionally attached to. You know what I’m talking about. She’s so sweet, funny, and chill so all the kids love her class. Tries to include memes in her presentations to seem “with it” but they’re like, doge memes from 2014. But the kids appreciate the effort.

Pema: Definitely the sweet English teacher that occasionally has a mental breakdown when the students test her patience. Otherwise very chill. Also teaches the Childhood Education and Development class. Her, Senna, and Bumi II run the school newspaper.

Bataar: Drafting. Pretty chill, very skilled, and def smokes on the weekend. Also, him and Suyin are that teacher couple that everyone likes.

Suyin: Dance. Super nice and always has like to of those smelly plug in things going so her room smells good and has a “good vibe that evokes emotion”. Always plays EDM or weird 80s rock to get the kids moving. She runs the school dance team. When Bataar has prep period, he sometimes drops in to see Su dance, cause she’s mesmerizing to watch. All the kids think that, coupled with the fact that they eat lunch together every day, makes them the cutest couple ever.

Amon: Drama. He loves directing kids on how to totally live a role. If you can imagine, he sometimes gets a little overdramatic about drama, forgetting that these are just highschool kids, not Oscar winners, but his passion makes the class more enjoyable. Runs Drama Club with Tarrlok.

Tarrlok: Probably Physics. A difficult class, but he’s pretty good at explaining so most kids don’t struggle too much. His main focus is running student government, which he takes pretty seriously. Sometimes too seriously.

Unalaq: Teaches Psychology. The most pretentious teacher on campus. It’s literally so bad, that even other teachers avoid him. Amon abandoned his coffee still being brewed in the machine in the staff room cause Unalaq walked in and he didn’t want to be in a room with Unalaq again after he said that Amon’s outfit “looked like something stolen from the lost and found of a funeral home”. Unalaq sees it as “telling it like it is”.

Zaheer: Government and Politics. Tries to teach the class very well but also injects his own opinion into teaching a lot. The students find him scary but some also kinda think he’s hot. Also does Yearbook. Him and Senna run Mock Trial. Replaced the old Government and Politics teacher Hou-Ting after she retired. She was that one old teacher that made it a hobby to harrass students and constantly reminisced about when you could smack students.

P’Li: Math teacher. Much scarier than Zaheer. Plays her trash ass music very loudly while the kids work. Def yells at kids. She’s kind of funny when she’s in a good mood tho, and when she roasts kids it’s really funny cause it’s usually dead on. Her and Zaheer are those teachers that flirt a lot and you know they’re sleeping together.

Ming-Hua: Art. Loves drawing and, you guessed it, watercolor painting. Very chill and plays soft music but lets you listen to your own music. Super sarcastic and all the students eat it up. Literally a universal favorite. She runs Art Club and Fashion Club.

Ghazan: Guitar. Pretty cool teacher that definitely has some weird stories. All the students know he has a crush on Ming-Hua cause they flirt constantly, but he denies it. Runs E-Sports Club. Idk why I think that, it just feels right. Him and Ming-Hua are also the kinds of teachers kids become emotionally attached to.

Kuvira: Government and Politics also. Seems calm and reasonable, but is a total ass. Makes kids give up their phones, allows almost no talking, gives out more detentions a week than most teachers do in one year, and doesn’t allow for much discussion. Everyone wants her class cause she’s hot but most drop within the first week, to the point that counselors have to say no to some kids so they don’t have to get rid of the class altogether.

Bataar Jr.: Computer Lit teacher. None of the students respect him so they’ll play Minecraft the whole time or play inappropriate videos really loud. Doesn’t really put much effort into teaching, which for some kids is a dream, but for others is an annoyance. Him and Kuvira are the teacher couple that makes everyone say “wtf”. Literally no one knows why they’re together.

Izumi: Secretary/Attendance. Pretty much remembers everything and is super organized. She is the glue that holds the school together. Most students don’t know her name though cause she’s super quiet and works mostly behind the scenes. Whenever Zuko sends anyone her way though he reminds them of her name and to say thank you cause he recognizes how hard his daughter works to keep everything running smoothly. Izumi catches on to this and always manages to thank her dad with a nice tea and a hug.

Toph: Vice Principal. Scary as fuck. Doesn’t ever call kids’ parents cause she efficiently scares the shit out of every kid, so they never do whatever bad thing they were doing again. When she has to work dances, Katara always tries to get her to dance with her. She resists every time, but she always gives eventually. She’s happy to though, cause although she’ll never say it out loud, seeing Katara this happy at her old age warms her heart.

Katara: Health Clerk. Very sweet and everybody loves her. Sometimes kids pretend to feel sick just to talk to her. She doesn’t mind though cause a kid that has a tummy ache and a kid that needs to talk are both kids that need help, and she’s happy to offer whatever support she can. She also always offers to supervise dances when the school has them and always manages to bust a move.

Zuko: Counselor. Wants to be to students what his uncle was to him. Aang and Sokka were counselors too, some years ago. And while they could give some good nuggets of advice and offered the kids amazing support, they also would totally fuck up student’s schedules by accident cause those numbskulls were exactly that- numbskulls. So usually Zuko would have to fix that. He misses fixing their messes and, more importantly, he misses them (they aren’t dead, just retired). He hopes to retire soon too, cause he’s getting too old for this, but he secretly doesn’t want to retire just yet cause working at school allows him to see and spend time with Izumi. Since they’re both working, it’s not like they have too much time together, but even just her popping into his office to bring him tea or check in on how he’s doing that day brings a smile to his face that doesn’t leave for the rest of the day.

Raiko: Principal. After Toph stepped down cause she’s “too old for this shit” (her words), Raiko stepped in. The students aren’t a fan of him but he’s not terrible. And since Toph is still Vice Principal, she keeps him in check.

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sinkix · 4 years

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~ Haikyuu!! Boys baking with reader - Ft. Ushijima, Tendou, Oikawa, Hinata & Nishinoya ~

YO! SO UHHHH... I’M BACK??? I GUESS?? MAYBE??? After a little break I had this in my drafts for a while and realllyyy wanted to complete it since it’s such a cute concept. Honestly at this point my posting frequencies are so sporadic and random pls forgive me lmao.

@deathcab4daddy gave me the inspo to include Ushi and it was so funny coming up with ideas for him, he is no.1 country boi chef

Dude I’m listening to the Mario Kart soundtrack ‘Coconut Mall’ while I continue writing this someone save me. Like u think I’m joking. UR WRONG.

Ushijima:

The most straightforward yet idiotic baker you will ever come across.

Before you even THINK about performing step 1, he will read the entire fucking leaflet like it’s a Shakesperean monologue.

INGREDIENTS INCLUDED.

LIKE SIS I DIDN’T NEED TO KNOW IT CONTAINS MONOCALCIUM PHOSPHATE THANK YOU.

I’m surprised he doesn’t count every single particle in the brownie mix.

You bought him a frilly cupcake-printed apron stating ‘best wife’ not expecting him to actually wear it

But since he’s secretly a big softie and treasures anything you buy he wears it proudly.

His stoic and dignified disposition is a comical contrast to the words printed on the front lmao.

Ushi best wifey bro.

The tight fit of the apron is pretty hot since it outlines every ridge of his pecs and tightly toned torso.

Gotta resist groping your mans while stirring the brownie batter.

tbh he’s more likely to grope you, he can’t resist that a$$.

And let’s face it he’s def an ass/thigh kinda guy.

Can and will try to casually initiate some form of unholy activities by lifting you up onto the kitchen counter, goading you to slowly lick the spoon and locking gazes before pulling you in for a deep, open-mouthed kiss to get a taste of the incomplete creation himself.

Ushi’s lips and brownie batter are a knock-out combo js.

Literally has the most serious face when he’s cracking the eggs into the bowl

The amount of concentration is equivalent to that of when he’s performing a serve at match-point.

HAS to set the temperature to the EXACT degree stated on the box

Everything is done by the book if you do one thing out of place he will pull you up on it lol.

“(Y/N) you were supposed to stir it for 5 minutes, not 7.”

When its done you feed him some and he can’t help but smile its so ADORBALE AHHH.

You end up eating most of it since Ushi doesn’t strike me as much of a chocolate/junk food lover.

STILL A VERY FUN BUT F R U S T R A T I N G EXPERIENCE.

Tendou:

The complete opposite of Ushi

Does everything wrong and the unconventional way.

Absolute disaster but doesn’t even sweat it since Tendou basically thrives in chaos and the disorderly.

To him instructions are purely equivocal, will read them for five seconds then toss them away.

Step aside Gordon Ramsey, Chef Tendou is here.

Despite doing everything the unorthodox way it still comes out amazing.

Like??? how???

Will cheekily place a dollop batter on your nose then lick it off fh3jkeffefds

Or if he’s feelin’ a lil freaky, he’ll swipe it off with his long ass finger and make you suck it clean, smirking at your submission as you coat his finger with your saliva.

oop-

Constantly cracking jokes and shitty food puns, pretending to drop the bowl to make you go into preemptive cardiac arrest before you can swat him with the spatula.

While you’re waiting for the timer to ping, Satori being the schemer he is will use this as an opportunity to pull some fuckery and tease you in any way he can.

u better be praying like bodhisattva TanaNoya rn because he is MERCILESS.

Suggestive comments, the brush of his fingers against your thigh, it’ll leave you A C H I N G in frustration by the end of it.

Unholy activities aside, once your baking session is completed you finish it off by feeding PHAT forkfuls of brownie to each other and giggling like dorks when it gets all over your mouth.

The jackass actually got a fingerful and SMEARED it over your cheek and forehead, drawing a little cross and snickering when the crumbs fall onto your nose.

Tendou was smart to draw a cross bc he gonna need jesus with the ATTACK you launch on him after that, which promptly leads to an all out food war in your kitchen that neither of you want to clean up after ward.

Don’t worry though it’s Tendou, he’ll somehow find a way to make such a mundane activity fun.

Nishinoya:

stirs WAY TOO VIOLENTLY

IT’S LIKE AN ELECTRIC WHISK ON OVERDRIVE.

IT WILL SPLATTER OVER THE COUNTER, CUPBOARDS AND EVERYTHING YOU HOLD DEAR WITHIN A 1 MILE RADIUS.

You best believe he will try and eat some of the batter and you have to swat the spoon away from his mouth since he has NO REGARD FOR THE FACT HE COULD GET SALMONELLA.

Plus you know what Noya’s like once he starts eating something the whole thing will be gone in a matter of milliseconds.

He somehow managed to get Baking powder EVERYWHERE and even gave him self a little moustache with it.

The white substance kinda looked like something else but you didn’t really wanna say lmaooo.

could explain why he has so much energy all the time oK ILL STOP-

While you’re putting the mix on the tray he is SO extra and will do fancy lil swirls and over extend his arm like a swan to gracefully spread the batter

until he nearly fucking knocks it over.

During processing time since he is so excitable and impatient you best believe he’s gonna suggest a game of ping pong or something because my guy can well and truly never sit still.

ping pong match with the spatulas, kitchen island and a hard boiled egg.

Pls be careful he will rolling thunder that egg and pimp slap it so hard with the spatula it’ll damn near give you a concussion, not intentionally, but like protect your noggin. Wear a helmet.

For the remaining 5 minutes of baking time y’all just sit like kids in front of the oven and watching it rise like starved hyena’s observing it’s pray before demolishing it into sad particles of cocoa.

And lemme tell u, once the timer pings, that baking tray is free real estate for Noya. Half of your creation will be devoured before you can even put it on a plate and marvel at your handiwork.

He kicked your ass at spatula ping pong btw I’m sorry sweaty but short kings stay winning.

Oikawa:

Such a dramatic bitch like he got the whole she-bang going on.

Strapped with a pink apron, a whisk at his side and standing proudly with both hands on his hips.He is prepared like a greek gladiator going into battle.

You better believe he gonna make some snarky remarks and tease your method of doing things.

“Ah-ah-ahhh (Y/N)-chan you’re doing it all wrong, let me show you how a PRO does it.”

Proceeds to drop entire bowl on his foot and yelp like a little girl in pain.

Well and truly embarrassed with himself, you put a band-aid on his toe and he piped down after that.

Shattered big toe and mixing bowl aside, actually a really good baker??

He is a PRO at decorating, y’all decided on cupcakes since its literally his forte to make them look aesthetic and pretty.

You almost don’t wanna eat them from how good they look.

jk almost

You take it in turns breaking bits off and placing pieces into each others mouth with a loud “aaaaaahhh!”

Places a piece in your mouth, leans forward and locks lips with you in a soft, passionate kiss before pulling away and uttering the words “It tastes even better coming from your mouth ;)”

hnnnNNGGGGGGggGg.

You both whine and bicker over who cleans up after.

“You cleaaannnnn!”

“no Toru YOU clean!”

“but I made the cupcakes look pretty :(”

“not as pretty as you <3″

He did the cleaning after that.

Like just stroke his ego with some compliments and he’s whipped with a smug grin on his face for the next 30 minutes.

You decide to save the rest and bring them to his next practise.

Literally on the verge of tears when he sees you beaming and holding the platter of treats, Kiyotani mauls half of them in a matter of seconds to which Oiks gets salty over LMAO.

Hinata:

So excited oh my god he’s so precious please protect him I will CRY-

Has a little sunflower apron on and JBJKNDDDKDW IM SMILING JUST IMAGINING HIM FIDGETING IN EXCITEMENT OVER THE THOUGHT OF BAKING COOKIES.

Yes you decided on cookies bc he goes rabid for some choc chip biccies.

You have to guide him v carefully because of how easily confused and clumsy he is.

Cannot for the life of him crack the eggs without getting a quarter of the shell in the bowl so you have to do it instead.

Has a surprising amount of strength and forearm power bc holy shit boy can stir FAST.

Hums a little tune while he does it and bobs up and down with a wide grin on his face it’s so adorable, he has such a gentle singing voice I can’t-

Attempts different shapes with the batter when pouring it onto the tray but fails pretty miserably lol.

he tried ok???

Once they’re done he takes the tray out of the oven and since it was heavy, subconsciously propped it with his knee and nearly dropped the entire tray from the pain. (I’ve actually done this before when making chicken nuggets I do not advise being that brain dead)

Had to put some burn cream on the bbies knee :’((

When you decided to dig in, he handed you a cookie that looked like a crooked circle and said he tried to make that one a heart and insisted he feed it to you.

Blushed VERY hard at the moment of silence and intense eye contact while he fed it to you.

Nearly short circuited when his fingers brushed against your lips.

Moe moe x100000000000000000000000000000

You offer to do the cleaning after because he hurt himself and you didn’t wanna make him do any work, but he still offered to wipe the surfaces for you bc he’s an angel <333

literally just wanna marry him.

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deathvsthemaiden · 3 years

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Tagged by the wonderful @sheherazade to make a 12 song long playlist (aka a good luck charm playlist!) that captures how I want 2021 to go! 💆🏽‍♀️

1. Hot Honey—Ari Chi. Reminds me of mornings where you’re up out of bed long before anyone else and feel super duper peaceful and careless and sunny in the chillest way as you drink tea and look out a window or read or something... I want even more mornings like that in ‘21 than I had in ‘20 god willing!! 🍯🐝

2. Green & Gold—Lianne La Havas. Lately i feel like her song Midnight (people think I'm crazy/lately I’m/living in midnight/just living in midnight~🎶 ) and it’s fun I’m having a grand isolated little time within the confines of my rich inner world but I hope to feel more like Green & Gold, the lyrics just feel way more... open and active/“ambitious” (for lack of a better word) than content. It’s witching hour I reserve the right to be vague and confusing 😔💕💕

3. Suspended in Gaffa—Kate Bush. God this song sounds like TRAVELING!! I want to do that! Not physically because of Current Events ofc but I want to feel the way this song makes me feel... energetic and like I’m going places in any sense of the word! I can’t explain it! 🧳👒 it reminds me of Tape Five’s Love Tonite and has lead girl of a musical in a bustling train station singing about the people around her and herself energy to me also it’s the one I’ve been looping most lately so GAISJAJJA

4. Everything’s Changin’—St. Arnaud. You know those cheesy montages of ppl slowly dancing in a funny way and mouthing along to the lyrics of a song together as it blasts out loud in sitcoms and such? Only this song would ever make me feel tempted to act that way.... only this one (not that I would but I would Feel A Pull) preferably on a boat in the middle of the ocean as the sun has almost totally set with string lights everywhere. also the lyrics are just so good please give it a try 🥺✌🏽

5. Making Love—Sir Woman. I know this is a smexy suggestive little song but it mostly reminds me of the beach and I just love the energy.... I know I said no traveling but like. To touch the sand of a beach with my own two feet again in the 21st year of the 21st century would not be abhorrent to me.... 🤕<\3 also idk part of the lyrics sound to me like they do indeed describe me at my best... almost-all-knowing and mischevious and fun loving @_@

6. Levitating—Dua Lipa. Even now, whilst on break, the phantom weights of my academic shackles pain and vex and haunt and taunt me (can’t chill out fully for some reason idk why. God help the mentally ill and academically incompetent such as I) not 2 mention the toll of all the extraneous family time I’ve been force fed lately so... I’d like to feel more weightless next year 👉🏽👈🏽 also this is just such a sparkly glitzy dazzling song it makes the child in me go: 🤩🌟💫

7. Hot Knife—Fiona Apple. Grievously, almost impressively late to the party in typical Hiba fashion, I only discovered Miss Apple and this song this year 😐🤭 but God! I miss myself I don’t want romance but I would like to find things that make my heart feel like a “CinemaScope screen showing a dancing bird of paradise” again 😔🔨!! And I love that the lyrics allow the singer to be the Hot Knife AND the Pat of Butter depending on where you are in the 4 minute long song... I love versatility I need to allow myself some more of it next year methinks 🤕✌🏽

8. Bambi—Hippo Campus. This feels way more like me right now than now I necessarily wish to be next year, down to the disobedient dysfunctional legs, but despite the sad state of affairs the lyrics describe the actual song is peppy and hopeful and jazz so like.. I hope to begin to undo the havoc I’ve wreaked on certain aspects of my life via neglect and/or as an unintended consequence of Being (Perpetually) (And More Than Usual) Out Of It. 🦌🪐👟

9. Mii Channel Theme. 1) it’s nostalgic 2) I added it to a recent playlist on a whim and every time shuffle spits it up it’s like I’m hearing the song for the first time... it’s so safe and fun and soothing and adventurous.... makes me want to act deranged in the most harmless way...... it’s an instrumental so when it comes on it empties my head in a comforting way....... I’d like 2021 to feel that balanced and pleasant if possible thank u in advance God<3 💓🎮

10. Slide—Calvin Harris ft. Frank Ocean. Potentially unrealistic 2020 goal # ???: make myself a snazzy little playlist of songs that make me wanna rollerblade/ice skate and actually. do that! This would be top of the list 🥺🛼⛸ as would this💓

11. Stuck in Your Head—Calista Garcia. Another beach like song and also very carefree, the lyrics feel all frank and unfazed... need that for me 🚗 🕶

12. Experience—Victoria Monét. I really do hope this year’s experiences teach future Hiba to be sharper and more proactive but we’ll see :/ anyway even if she totally fails this song is SO catchy and will still be there for her to listen to 🥺💃🏽

Tagging: @pinkafropuffs @noblyphantasmic @fatallist @thebodykeepsscore @dionhysus @netherites @natalya-romanova @miraclegirl @hotsharkgirl2000 @hotgirlkaladin @stereolovers @the-knights-who-say-book @haldimilks @ijaaazat @2006barbie @thoroughbredsbian @kashilascorner @kai-teuthis-satou @bluyuki @holmesianhive @slowlikehoney1996 @serduszko @k-amui @lylelylepantsonfyle @adorakeys @tricketra @howaboutswords and I’m def forgetting some ppl, plz consider urself tagged in spirit and do this if you’d like to participate!! And tag meee I wanna see 👁👁

#tagged in #OK SO I made an actual playlist for my own convenience linked at the top and since Spotify adds their own songs if you have less than 15 in #a playlist I mentioned 3 extras in this post so I could add them too and ~justify~ it #to myself WHAJWJWJ #ty ilika this was a lot of fun! 💕💕

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cuttlefishkitch · 4 years

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hello! i haven't talked to you before, but ron said that i could ask you for some advice on writing eds? (i'd like to know things to avoid/common things that could come up in everyday life that would be good to mention/the sort of aids and stuff they'd have maybe?/anything else you think is relevant)

Hi! Sorry this took so long, a combination of ADHD and chronic pain slowed me way the fuck down. Thank you for being patient!

EDIT: WEIRD HEEL THINGS I FORGOT!!

So, before I get into this I should probably say I technically haven’t been diagnosed with Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (EDS for anyone reading) because it’s one of those syndromes that takes forever to get diagnosed with (it took a friend of mine’s mother over 30 years to get dxed). Many doctors, and everyone I know who does have EDS agree with me that it’s probably what causes my chronic joint pain and some of my other chronic issues. But just because three separate doctors have said “Yeah Probably” doesn’t mean I’m diagnosed!! Only a geneticist can do that!! And they had two-three year waitlists BEFORE the apocalypse happened.

I am diagnosed with Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (POTS), Small Fiber Neuropathy, and potentially misdiagnosed with Fibromyalgia (once I get properly tested for EDS I might get undiagnosed with this because I don’t have most of the main symptoms of Fibro, but I got diagnosed with it anyway because it’s what doctors misDX you with when they don’t know what’s wrong with you and don’t want to do more tests).

All that said, I’ve done a lot of research about EDS (mainly because it’s the only thing that explains all my symptoms since doctors seem incapable of doing so), and know a few people who have either confirmed or suspected EDS, so I’ll link to some stuff, talk about the symptoms that often come with EDS, explain how the symptoms I have affect me, because just because someone’s not diagnosed doesn’t mean they aren’t having symptoms, and probs elaborate a bit about writing physical disabilities and chronic pain in general because it’s super important to me!

So RESOURCES aka how to make sure your post never sees the light of day because you’re linking things and tumblr hates it when people give other people information!!

Youtubers! If you want to know about the day to day of living with EDS or any disability or chronic illness I super suggest finding a youtuber that makes videos about their life. My EDS favorites are

Jessica Kellgren-Fozard

Annie Elainey

Amy Lee Fisher

Websites! If you’re asking random folks on tumblr I’m assuming (and hoping) you’ve already done the basic WebMD google searches and looked over the seemingly ridiculous lists of symptoms and related conditions, so here are a few websites that are made more for people than for doctors.

The Ehlers Danlos Society

OhTWIST (That’s Why I’m So Tired)

ChronicPainPartners (the fact that they have an entire section of articles called “Dealing with Doctors” should really tell you something)

Books! If you feel like doing actual reading! I suggest reading books written by people with Ehlers Danlos, to get a feel for how they portray themselves. I’m not saying steal, but it’s probably a good point of comparison to see how your portrayal feels. (haven’t actually read these b/c my ADHD doesn’t let me read)

Ria Ruse by Morgan S. Ray (a superhero book with a disabled super MC!!)

Mysteries of Maybelle by Imani Benfell (Imani is still in high school and has already written and self-published a book cause she didn’t have enough representation for herself how cool is she!!)

Bodies in Motion by Liana Brooks (tw for pregnancy problems and miscarriages in the link, because it’s a blog post talking about integrating EDS symptoms into the story without explicitly naming them as such)

OKAY, now for some rambling about EDS SYMPTOMS!!!

Ehlers Danlos is one monster of a genetic condition in complexity and variety. There are THIRTEEN different identified types of EDS, it often comes with Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS) and/or POTS, and can lead to various other conditions like gastroparesis, chiari malformation, craniocervical instability, and/or bad teeth. So if you’re going to be writing a character with EDS consider what other comorbid conditions they might also have. I’m mainly going to be talking about Hypermobile EDS (hEDS) because it’s what I probably have and what I’m most familiar with. That said there is a lot of overlap in symptoms with the other varieties.

I started typing this section and realized I was going to have to break it down even more so we’re going to talk about Chronic Pain, Unstable Joints (Dislocations and Subluxations), Skin Things, Mobility Issues, and Other Weird Shit and how those things get addressed separately.

Gonna get the Other Weird Shit out of the way first. Because EDS is a malfunction of connective tissue it can fuck up all sorts of random things. For instance, I and many other people w/ hEDS have trouble swallowing. Shit gets stuck in my throat, I sometimes choke on and have to cough up food, and pills can be hard to swallow, which sucks cause I take A Lot Of Pills. If it doesn’t cause full-on gastroparesis it can cause IBS or other digestive problems b/c the digestive tract is mostly made of connective tissue. It can potentially cause heart problems even if they aren’t as big of a risk as in some other forms of EDS. Premature osteoarthritis is common because what you need is more joint pain. And Fatigue OH BOY THE FATIGUE. And of course the headaches, can’t forget those pesky migraines can we!

AND piezogenic papules!! I completely forgot!! Piezogenic papules are little white bumps that appear when you put weight on your heel. In some people they hurt, but in others they don’t. They’re technically tiny little herniations of fat peaking through the fascia in the heel. They were added as part of the diagnostic criteria for hEDS in 2017!

Now for Skin Things cause it’s not as big a thing in hEDS as it is in other forms. Basically, in a lot of forms of EDS, the skin is extra stretchy and extra delicate. It bruises and tears easily, people with the extreme versions of this can accidentally scratch something into an open wound if they aren’t careful. My skin is pretty soft and sensitive, I def have the typical velvety skin, and as is pretty par for the course of someone with hEDS my skin is a little stretchy, and sorta delicate. I’m not as tissue-papery as some people get, but I almost always have at least one mystery bruise or scrape b/c existing is hazardous. Most of scars are also pretty normal, unlike the extremely papery and atrophic scars (though I have a few tiny acne scars that are atrophic) that are common with other kinds of hEDS. Something that I DO have is Lots of Stretch Marks, all over my thighs, and even down to my calves. Which wouldn’t be abnormal, except for the fact that I’ve never been over 145 lbs and I’ve never been pregnant. Having a lot of stretch marks or striations in the skin without due cause happens because the structure of the skin isn’t as strong as it is in people with a normal amount of connective tissue.

I don’t have to worry as much about my skin but people that do are usually very careful with adhesives because they can irritate or tear the skin, which sucks when you need a lot of bandaids cause your darn skin won’t do its job.

Now on to the meatier stuff and since I’m mostly working backward let’s do Mobility Issues!! These can happen in loads of ways, but a lot of what causes these in people with EDS are the other two things I wanna talk about. Unstable joints lead to increased risk of injury when doing stuff people with fully functioning joints can do.

For context, I’m an ambulatory wheelchair user, meaning I can walk, but a lot of the time it’s better if use a chair. Mine is mostly for my POTS symptoms, but the fact that my legs aren’t also in absolute agony is a big plus. I use a custom manual wheelchair with a SmartDrive (b/c I’m very fucking fortunate and have good insurance) whenever I leave the house and have to be “walking” for more than a few minutes at a time. I can’t fully self-propel in a manual chair because it would be damaging to the joints in my arms and hands, but the smaller chair is easier to maneuver in less than accessible spaces (like almost everywhere). There was about a month-long span where I used a very cheap and very bulky electric chair while I was waiting on the ideal set up I have now. Before that, I also briefly used, and sometimes still use, an up-right posture cane.

People with EDS have widely varying mobility issues because of how uniquely it can manifest. My cane only gave me a little help with balance because if I used it in any prolonged capacity any pain it took away from my legs was relocated to my arms, and as an artist, my arms are more important to me!

If you’re going to write a character with EDS having mobility issues as a result of their EDS the best thing to do is to narrow down their specific needs. Are their knees complete and utter garbage but their shoulders and wrists strong? Maybe they can get away with using a cane. Can they not stand for longer than 5 minutes because of the vertigo from their POTS? Maybe they need a manual wheelchair. Would propelling themself damage their back and arm joints? An electric chair might be necessary! Plenty of people with EDS use all sorts of combinations of these aides to get around their life, consider how your character’s good and bad days would be. Do they have back up plans if they overestimate themselves? There can be a lot to manage, but don’t let it scare you off! Sometimes I try and make it into a resource management game (because I’m a game designer and that’s what I do), to make evaluating my energy and mobility needs more fun!

But now let's tackle some of the reasons those mobility aides might be needed. Unstable Joints.

Ever stepped wrong and rolled your ankle? It hurts for a few steps and then kinda fixes itself, or maybe it bothers you for the rest of the day and you put it up and ice it when you get home? When I was walking around outside my house that would happen AT LEAST once a month, usually more. Some times I’m sitting wrong and when I get up my knee isn’t a knee anymore and decides to just give out from under me. My knuckles are made of unruly popcorn and they Don’t Want To Stay Home!! Oh! And my shoulder is more often out a little out of its socket than it is fully in.

Unstable joints lead to Dislocations and Subluxations of varying intensity, and some people get them more frequently than others. Some can be severe enough to necessitate hospital visits and even surgery, some subluxations are so banal (like my fUCKING SHOULDER) that you just learn to live with the pain.

If a character is going to be in high action, combat-heavy scenarios, chances are they’re going to be popping out joints left and right. Hell, depending on the severity of their joint laxity they could be doing the same sitting at a desk. Again, it’s incredibly varied. I’d suggest setting some sort of baseline for yourself, of what a character’s joints can and can’t stand up to, and maybe do some research on which joints are most likely to pop out in general (hips and shoulders are big culprits being the wacky ball and socket motherfuckers they are). Then maybe have something pop out or hold up every so often when it shouldn’t cause hey! EDS is kinda just like that! Unpredictable!

Some ways people manage joint laxity is with braces, KT tape, and physical therapy. Braces come in many different forms, since I’m currently getting pretty much no treatment for my shitty joints I use mostly compression braces made for sporty people. It really is amazing how much a bit of tight fabric can do to keep my wrist in place.

More specialized braces often have solid parts to prevent the joints from hyper-extending (bending the wrong way) and causing further damage. If you ever see someone with what looks like diamond shaped rings around a bunch of their finger joints, chances are those are Ring Splints, and are there to keep the finger shaped like a finger. I want to get my hands on some and get some on my hands Very Badly, because my fingers hyper-extend SO MUCH when I type, and it makes my hand pain way way worse.

KT tape is another thing people often use. It’s stretchy tape you put on your skin and it basically functions kinda like a second ligament as well as reinforcing the joint and keeping the bones mostly where they’re supposed to be. The problem with this is a lot of people with EDS have very sensitive and fragile skin like I mentioned before, so KT tape can cause allergic reactions, chronic skin irritation, or just straight up take the skin with it when someone goes to remove it. Hence a lot of folks are really careful with it.

Physical Therapy is kinda the best (and only) treatment for joint laxity aside from Very Invasive and sometimes Highly Experimental surgery. It focuses on strengthening the muscles around the joints so they can do the work all those bone ropes made of body glue can’t. The problem is finding a physical therapist that 1) knows what EDS even is, 2) knows you have it, and 3) knows how to treat it without doing stuff that’ll Phucking Hurt You Worse!! Because exercising wrong with EDS can do Permanent Damage!!!

Again most folks use a combination of all of these things, or have next to no access to them b/c healthcare sucks.

Anyway, on to one of my favorite topics, Chronic Pain!! One of the reasons this post took me so long!!!

Chances are if your character has chronic pain as a result of their EDS there are gonna be some things they hate, including stairs, rain, thunderstorms, stairs, hills, uneven terrain, oh and did I mention stairs??? It’s going to vary person to person, but almost everyone I’ve met with pain from EDS has complained about their knees. For me the most debilitating pain is in my fingers and wrists. They’re by far my least stable joints but I use them constantly for stuff like drawing, typing, and sewing.

Because my joint pain is so wide spread, like most people’s with hEDS, it effects every single part of my day to day life. I can’t carry a heavy ceramic plate, open a bottle, or even use my computer without pain. It’s practically impossible for me to get comfortable in any position be it sitting or laying down, and as you can imagine that makes it hard to sleep a lot of the time. Moving too much hurts, but so does sitting still. I’m constantly taking braces on and off or cracking/stretching my joints so they pop back into place and hurt less.

Also being in pain makes everything else That Much Worse. I get tired way faster than I did before my pain was this bad (I had chronic pain for a while before actually realizing it wasn’t normal to not be able to walk down the block without feeling like your foot bones are trying to escape). My sensory issues and anxiety disorder are more easily aggravated because my base level of comfort is way worse. It fucks with my depression. And OH BOY does it make my ADHD worse because being in pain is fucking distracting as hell and makes it harder to make decisions and switch tasks. Also my ADHD often makes my other symptoms worse cause I forget to take my meds, don’t drink enough water, or can’t find my fucking braces because the item eating black-hole that comes with ADHD stole them. The intersection of mental and physical disabilities is probably a rant for another time though, so back to chronic pain.

Does it suck? Yes, undoubtedly. Is this incredibly debilitating? Of course it is, I spent the last several months unable to feed myself without assistance because there was a staircase between my room and the kitchen and I could only manage to climb it once a day. Is it overwhelming? Definitely, I’ve frequently broken down crying from a combination of pain and frustration because I’m having a bad day and there’s no relief to be found. Am I able to predict when it’s going to rain with uncanny accuracy because any change in barometric pressure makes me feel like every bone in my body is trying to kill it’s neighbors? You bet your fucking ass I am!! Does it sometimes make me irritable, angry, and occasionally dismissive of when abled people get cold or a temporary injury because the stuff they’re complaining about is my life every single day and all avenues of treatment and recovery I have could take years and still not entirely solve my issues? Yeah, and while I deserve a little extra patience I also have to be sure to check myself because I don’t want to turn into someone who’s nasty to be around. Do I sometimes need to sleep for 17 hours straight because it’s raining, I have migraine, and I’m in too much pain to be conscious? Yup, sometimes a few days in a row. Does living in constant pain mean I’m unable to do all the things I want to and does that sometimes make me wanna curl up in bed and never leave? Yeah, it happens.

But! And here’s the big important but, that’s not everything! I still write, draw, and talk to my friends!! It might take me a little longer but I get there. I’m still happy and excitable and make the time to write out five page long posts about EDS because it’s something I’m passionate about! My chronic pain doesn’t stop me. I refuse to let it. I never really wanted to go mountain climbing anyway, so I’m perfectly happy being able to make it up and down the six steps in my house, even if sometimes I have to sit and bump down them on my ass, or crawl up them like a cat. Chronic pain isn’t all I am. It isn’t a fate worse than death. It isn’t the only thing your character should talk about (though I do talk about my pain a lot cause I’m a complainer about almost everything). You can have your character be hindered by their pain, realistically they would be. You can have them seek comfort, support, and relief. Other characters can commiserate and be sympathetic, but it doesn’t mean their whole life is going to be one big pity party, that would be incredibly fucking boring. I know I’d be bored out of my mind.

All that said dealing with chronic pain, especially from EDS, is Complicated. Physical Therapy is the gold standard, but like I said before it can be a long and difficult process, and isn’t always accessible. Stabilization methods like I talked about before can help prevent pain, or reduce it by keeping bones mostly where they belong. Heat and cold help joints, relax muscles, and reduce inflammation but keeping them applied is rough and the relief doesn’t always last. Doctors prescribe anti-depressants, anti-anxiety, and sometimes even anti-epileptic medication to help manage pain, but everyone’s mileage with those varies. And I’m not at all qualified to talk in-depth about narcotics or other heavy duty pain-meds, but suffice to say the war on drugs fucked shit up for people that legit need that kind of help BIG TIME.

Now for my closer/bonus rant about EDS and Disability Writing in General!

Everyone always says write what you know, so if you really want to do disabled people justice, get to know disabled people! Make friends with disabled people, get involved with advocacy groups, consume content made by disabled creators both about disability and not! Disabilities are so fucking diverse, even EDS is such a complex disorder, and comes with so many potential co-morbidities, that practically everyone with it has a unique experience. There’s no way I can fully explain everything in a tumblr post. Hell, even if I could talk to you for hours probably couldn’t give you enough info to answer all your questions (especially since I’m still in diagnosis hell :,) ), so talk to a wide range of people with EDS and other disabilities!! I know it sounds like a lot of work but trust me, disabled people are some of the strongest, raddest, coolest, people you will ever meet that it won’t feel like it.

And don’t be afraid either, the fact that EDS and other disabilities are so wildly varied means that you have a little bit of wiggle room with your character’s experience. There’s so little disability rep out their I think people are WAY to scared to try their hand at writing it. So long as your character is a fully developed person in addition to being disabled, you give some logical thought as to how it would affect their life, and you don’t make their disability the butt of any joke it isn’t difficult to avoid ableist writing. PLEASE WRITE MORE DISABLED PEOPLE AND PEOPLE WITH CHRONIC PAIN/CHRONIC ILLNESS!!

Okay that’s it, again sorry it took so long for me to get back to you! My fingers were being little pests about it, and my ADHD (which is honestly more disabling than everything else a lot of the time lmao) was being an asshole! Hope this helps, and feel free to ask me more questions if you need clarification! It might take me a bit but I do love talking about this stuff.

#neela-chaan #ehlers danlos syndrome #EDS #hEDS #hypermobile ehlers danlos #disability #writing advice #disability writing #Chronic Pain #asks #SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG IM JUST SLOW #also i'm sorry the formatting is such a wreck #my adhd won't let me go back and fix it #and i've already spent way too much time

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leavetwn · 3 years

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* KAYLEE BRYANT, CISWOMAN + SHE/HER | you know SUZIE TANAKA, right? they’re TWENTY-ONE, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, EIGHTEEN YEARS? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to VALENTINE BY HOPE TALA like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole ROLLERSKATES SCUFFED FROM YEARS OF USE, STARTING A JOURNAL ENTRY TWO YEARS SINCE THE LAST ONE, A SIGH OF RELIEF ONCE YOU'RE FINALLY ALONE thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is NOVEMBER 28TH, so they’re a SAGGITARIUS, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( claire, 22, est, she/her )

it’s me again ! bringing a character who i’ve played for a while now, just switched up & such for every rp, and now , i’m bringin her here. :^) i hope you enjoy her as much as i do! tw: mentions of mental illness (anxiety)

𝐈. ━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬 .

full name: suzie tanaka. nickname(s): su, anything your muse wants to call her tbh. age: twenty-one. date of birth: november 28th. zodiac sign: saggitarius. gender/pronouns: ciswoman, she/her. sexual orientation: bisexual. romantic orientation: biromantic. hometown: san francisco, californio. current residence: irving, north carolina. occupation: part time waitress at cutie pie’s thanks to her skills on skates. full time student at the local college in her junior year as a creative writing major. she minors in film pro eye color: brown. hair color/style: dark brown, upper-mid back length & she usually just wears it in a simple ponytail. it’s more manageable when she’s out. however, when she’s at home, she’ll leave it down. height : 5′3″. clothing style: you can’t really put suzie’s style into one category. it’s inspired by several different eras & many times she pieces it together. some might call it a bit tacky at times, but she thinks it looks cute. to her, that’s all that matters. tattoos: none. probably could never attempt to get one cause she’s seriously afraid of needles lol. piercings: her ears and that’s when she was fairly young. reference the tattoos portion for reasoning.

𝐈. ━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐡𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 .

when you were around six years old , you first realized that you were lonely. it wasn’t like you weren’t around other people. it was just that those people were mostly your mom and dad. occasionally your cousins would come over sometimes, but they were all older than you by at least four years. your parents were kind of eccentric, and for that, they experienced how harsh other kids could be very early on. they decided they didn’t want you to experience the same things, so since both were felt they were prepared enough to do so, they homeschooled you to keep you sheltered from those types of things.

you’re sure they had good intentions. that’s not something you questioned, but you wished they’d at least find another kid you could be friends with or have another kid. you found yourself bored by yourself, so you immersed yourself in things like books or whatever movies they had around the house. this is where your love of fairytales began, and you’d fantasize about living in one while you read or watched the stories unfold.

you lived in your head, and you still pretty much do. you’re an idealist, even though you haven’t seen much of the world. perhaps it’s the fact that you haven’t ventured very far from your home that makes you so, and while life could still be boring, you always had another book or movie to keep you company. you grew content being on your own, and the more that you were, the more you began to enjoy your own company.

that didn’t change the fact that you longed for friends. in all the stories you read or watched, the protagonist had one other person along with them for much of their journey. sure, you had people that you were friendly with, but it was never to the extent that you wanted. it was never a best friend or a close group — just someone you saw on few occasions. it also didn’t help how you felt when you were around others. the way you monitored every step you took, the way you crossed your legs, or going over the way you would speak to someone in your head over and over. you figured for the longest time it was because you were shy, but a diagnosis of anxiety gave you a lot more clarity and almost a sense of relief. those things started to make more sense.

being alone helped a lot when it came to academics. you spent a lot of your time studying or looking up random ass facts on the internet, and because of this, you’d call yourself fairly smart. you know your shit. it also helped a lot when getting into colleges. you didn’t aim too high though, not yet comfortable being all the way on your own. so, you chose the nearby university to attend.

you move out. you’re excited, and your parents are nervous but prepared. they’re not oblivious to the fact that this day would come. you’re ready to go out and face the world, but most of all, you’re ready to make friends. you’re ready to go out and experience the world, every small step at a time. you’re convinced at college you’ll become a brand new person, find yourself, and make plenty of friends.

it doesn’t go like that at first. of course it doesn’t. it’s a new environment, and it takes getting used to. but soon, people loosen up and warm up to you. you’re quick to make a couple of friends. it isn’t at all like the stories you’d read or watched when you were younger. it is happy and fun and joyous, but you realize that friendships take work. it’s a bit exhausting, as someone who had become such an introvert, but you manage and form close bonds.

as of now, you are working on your degree and managing life one step at a time. you’re doing pretty well, and things are looking up. you keep your head in the clouds still to this day, imagining what the future will be like. you’re still idealistic and optimistic, not that that’s a bad thing.

𝐈. ━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐨𝐮𝐬 .

i was being exaggerative with the ‘being at home’ stuff rip. i mean, she did spend a lot of time at home, but she wasn’t always there. her dad would take her out to rockin’ and rollin’, and i mean, she fuckin rocks when it comes to skating. it was kind of freeing to her as a child. she def got a pair of rollerblades as a christmas present, and she probably was the kid skating down her neighborhood road and shit from sunrise until her mom told her to take her ass inside.

maybe seems like she’s ditzy and she’s probably somewhat naive, but she’s definitely not stupid. she’s also a fast learner. she is, however, too nice for her own good. she’ll learn eventually, but she’s hopeful and an optimist at heart 💔

loves her dad but tells her mom everything. she doesn’t recognize it, but her mom was probably her first best friend lmaoo. they have a really good relationship. she has a good relationship with her dad too. he’s a bit more closed off than her mom, and she recognizes that but understands.

has an irrational fear that everyone’s like,,, staring at her & thinking she’s weird. really wants everyone to like her but she’s not sure how to make that happen (news flash, it won’t)

her fam is actually from san francisco but when she was 3, her dad got a better offer in irving so that’s how they ended up here. she knows this & she wonders what life woulda been like if she stayed back in san fran. probably wouldn’t have changed but she literally lives in her head and imagines shit like that’s her job at this point so yehhh

dreams of being a screenwriter and maybe even a director one day. she saw how film and books influenced her life as a kid & she wants to have the same impact, yk? v cute to me i love that. maybe she’ll write a book one day too who knows

i’m feelin like she has a ton of online friends cause she was seeking connection /w people so it makes sense. shout out to all her online pals who kept her sane & shit, but it wasn’t enough for her cause she really wanted those kinds of things irl.

is a hopeless romantic rip to her. just wants someone to sweep her up off her feet and give her butterflies but this aint no damn fairytale so let’s make it chaotic

character parallels: lily (dash & lily, 2020) , amélie poulain (amélie, 2001) , belle in some ways lmao (beauty and the beast, 1991) more to be added.

𝐈. ━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 .

* friends, best friends, etc. — literally any friends at all. this is the connection she craves the most tbh. platonic over romantic periodt ! she just wants people to braid her hair and have deep, personal convos with about literally anything while legally blonde is on the television.

* a bad influence — i mean, she stayed inside mostly & is kind of an introvert. didn’t have tons of friends either, so she didn’t really have time to go to parties, etc. BE A BAD INFLUENCE SHE NEEDS TO LET LOOSE LMAOO. it’ll prolly take a lot to get her out but hey

* good influence — someone she’s a good influence on & who she helps in some way. i could see it happenin’. if you see it happening, i mean... hmu you know where i am mwah 💖

* crush — someone she’s head over heels with. i mean, it probably wouldn’t take a lot. in my head she be catching feelings way too fast. it’s just a thing, but yeah, it could go either way. maybe your character is into her too or she’ll end up getting her heart broken which is lmao bound to happen one day. could also be someone who’s crushing on her but she’s way to busy focusing all her romantic attention on someone else to notice? idk i’m just here for all the plots.

* annoyance — someone who finds her ass annoying/does not like her. she wants everyone to like her so it would be so confusing and upsetting and she would be like wtf did i do but i want it cause i love angst. sorry to all my muses out there luv yall but i’m just bein real

* again, anything at all — if you have an idea that you love, pls don’t hesitate to hmu and lemme know. i promise i will 99.9% of the time be down. the same goes for any wanted connection doodads that i reblog like if u see it and ur like omg i luv that... PLEASE hmu i luv u all already & just wanna have plots and write with you srsly

#irvingintro #well there u have it my last one done i am so THANKFUL AND HAPPY #takes a bow #the way it's almost 4 am see i did not lie i am up forever

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trensu · 4 years

Text

Episode 46: The One with All the Yunmeng Bros Angst

gross, ouyang and yao are talking. let’s ignore them!

blah blah plot plot blah

ooh thank god, wwx is now the one talking

being all detective-y and asking relevant questions

I LOVE MY SUNSHINE BOY WHEN HE'S BEING CLEVER

wwx makes some Plot Relevant Point and yao is like I DISAGREE bc ofc he fucking does

LOL WWX'S FACE WHEN YAO INTERRUPTS LIKE THAT

IT'S LIKE HE'S BITING DOWN ON HIS TONGUE TO NOT SNAP SOMETHING BACK

kudos to him on his self-control tbh but it's wasted on yao.

wwx is all asking things like why are you ladies fessing up now, oh and btw that's a real neat bracelet you got there...

and then nhs is like, gee i wonder what kind of person would've sent these ladies here today

LOLOLOL NHS IS SUCH A TROLL OMG

and yao is like DETAILS DON'T MATTER, WHAT IS CRITICAL THINKING ANYWAY LET'S GO MURDER FOR JUSTICE AGAIN

and everyone else is like, HEY, THIS LOUD GUY HAS A POINT LET'S GO MURDER

okay, they don't actually say anything about murder but they're harping about "justice"

The last time they did that, it resulted in murder so i'm gonna go ahead and assume this time isn't any different

lwj: many skeptical points remain

THANK YOU, LWJ, FOR BEING SENSIBLE

oh, and i would like to point out that the crowd had been getting rowdy

but the minute lwj interjected there they all fell silent

My guy didn't even raise his voice and was able to shut up a whole room full of people.

I LOVE YOU HANGUANG JUN

lqr: what are they?

wwx: SO MANY.

wwx makes some Points and is like so we got some witnesses now but where's the HARD EVIDENCE GUYS??

and yao is like, whatever, we'll find it sooner or later now that we know THE TRUTH

and wwx's reaction lolol

it's like oh my god how stupid is this guy, that's not how it works, that's not how ANY of this works

I FEEL YOUR PAIN, WWX, I FEEL IT IN MY SOUL

ppl are blabbering Plot Stuff

i'm just gonna enjoy the occasional shots of wwx and lwj's beautiful faces

blah blah blah plot plot plot blah

gosh, my boys are so pretty

LOOK AT THEM BEING PRETTY, I LOVE THEM

(i say as the crowd devolves into vicious mob mentality)

wwx's had enough of this and turns to leave bc angry mobs are old news at this point

And we all know how he ended up last time there was an angry mob

but yao and some rando interrupt his exit as if they have ANY RIGHT to speak to my sunshine boy at all

Eventually we DO escape sword hall and the mob of stupid people and our boys are alone together wandering lotus pier!!!

they're reviewing Plot Info and bouncing ideas off each other and IT'S BEAUTIFUL, THEY'RE SO SMART AND IN LOVE

They determine that they don't have enough clues to say who the mysterious 3rd party is

but they def have enough evidence showing jgy murdered nmj and is generally an evil conniving bastard.

lwj mentions that he's going to send word to his brother to be careful since jgy is EVIL FOR SURE NOW.

oooh, our boys just came upon the jiang clan's ancestral shrine

wwx freezes, eyes red-rimmed and shiny, MY POOR SUNSHINE BOY

lwj: what's wrong?

ALL OF HIS ATTENTION IS GLUED TO WWX'S EVERY MOVE ALL THE TIME, ISN'T IT??

SEE HOW INTENTLY HE LOOKS AT WWX??

me too, lan zhan, me too

wwx: nothing. it's the ancestral hall of the jiang clan

he says this softly, like it hurts to acknowledge it or smth

lwj: do you want to enter?

wwx: no

WHICH IS A BLATANT LIE

EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM IS SCREAMING HOW MUCH HE WANTS TO GO IN THERE

they make to turn away and pause for a moment, during which wwx looks back at the shrine longingly

cut to the next scene where we see wwx burning some incense sticks in the shrine

AND OUR BOYS BOW TOGETHER 3x TO M-YU, JFM, AND JYL

wwx greets his deceased loved ones solemnly

wwx: it's me. i'm here to disturb you again.

idk about m-yu and jfm, BUT JYL WOULD NEVER THINK WWX'S PRESENCE WAS A DISTURBANCE

now wwx is telling lwj about how he used to spend a ton of time in that shrine bc m-yu would punish him by sending him there to, idk, reflect on his sins before the ancestors or smth

and lwj is like, yeah, i heard about that

then wwx comments on how he's never met a woman as irritable as m-yu, and how she punished him for trifles all the time

then he laughs bashfully and says "my fault, my fault" and bows another 3x bc omg wwx you can't speak ill of the dead, especially not at their shrine

this is a nice moment between them so far, actually.

it's nice to hear wwx reminisce in a way that's not 100% painful

and the fact that he's sharing these little bits of inconsequential info with lwj, his soulmate, is just very sweet to me

lwj: won't you tell jc?

wwx: idk. at least not yet

lwj: after all, you two are sworn brothers

it's nice of lwj to acknowledge that, without any sort of rancor in his tone, considering how much he does not care for jc (to put it mildly)

wwx: since the misunderstanding between us is so deep, it's not that easy to solve

HE SOUNDS SO RESIGNED, AND THE LITTLE SMILE THAT FLASHED BRIEFLY THERE WAS JUST SO SAD

and then he's like, besides, I created Plot Device 2, regardless of whether or not jgy ended up using it to make Plot Device 3

UH OH, HERE COMES JC

jc: wei wuxian

OH GOD, CAN HE PACK ANY MORE BITTERNESS AND VENOM INTO THAT NAME??

wwx stands immediately when he hears jc call, he doesn't look at him tho

lwj stands a beat after as jc enters the shrine

jc: you still take yourself as one of the jiang clan? come and go at any time you like, then bring people here when you wish. Do you remember whose house this is? who's the owner?

YIKES

THAT ONE HURT.

and wwx just takes it

wwx: i didnt take hanguang jun to any confidential places in Lotus Pier. i just brought him here to offer some incense to clan leader jiang and madam yu.

he's so submissive here and not even in a fun way

it’s in his posture and tone of voice, even in how he still doesn't look directly at jc...it makes me sad

wwx: we're leaving

He tries to retreat bc he def doesn't want this this confrontation to happen

jc: you really should kneel down to them, for coming to their presence to destroy the view and ruin their quiet.

DOUBLE YIKES.

that one hurt EVEN MORE

and lwj, who had been following wwx's lead and staying quiet, intervenes

lwj: clan leader jiang, pay attention to your words

oh boy if looks could kill, jc would be dead as a doornail

he's like HURT MY SOULMATE AGAIN, I DARE YOU. JUST GIVE ME A REASON AND I WILL STRIKE YOU DOWN

which is pretty gutsy since jc is higher ranked than him, technically, as clan leader.

AND they're both in jc's domain rn!

jc: what did you say? i think someone else needs to watch his behavior

he's glaring at wwx's back and he's got a mean twist to his mouth that would be a smile if it weren't so cruel

jc: you have already been kicked out of our family. how dare you enter and face my parents and my sister?

STOP HURTING MY SUNSHINE BOY

wwx is just accepting this. he's just accepting all these cruel things with his eyes downcast and submissive

BC IT HURTS AND HE BELIEVES HE DESERVES IT

lwj: jiang wanyin

HOLY SHIT

lwj fucking HISSED that name

and he took a VERY MENACING step towards jc

MY GUY

MY GUY, YOU CAN'T ATTACK A CLAN LEADER

ESPECIALLY NOT IN HIS OWN HOME

LIKE, I TOTALLY GET WHY YOU'D WANT TO RN, AND, Y'KNOW, I'M NOT THE MOST POLITICALLY SAVVY PERSON AROUND

BUT THIS JUST SEEMS LIKE A BAD IDEA ALL AROUND

thank god wwx is there

wwx stops him, pressing the palm of his hand into lwj's torso (!!!!!)

wwx: lan zhan. lan zhan, let's go

he practically whispers this, head bent down, AGAIN SUPER SUBSERVIENT

but jc is looking for a fight and he's not letting go until he gets one, apparently

jc: go as far as you can. i don't want to see you AWFUL PEOPLE again before my dead family

wwx just halts in his steps.

he had been all prepared to go after taking that tongue lashing that he thinks he's earned, but at that he takes a deep, fortifying breath bc jc crossed a line

he purses his lips a moment before turning to finally face jc head on

wwx: jc, scold me as you like but not the others (aka LWJ)

oooh, but that was the wrong thing to say to jc right now bc jc goes off on a VERY PAINFUL rant

he's like, oh, i should be nice to lwj? don't you remember that MY PARENTS WERE KILLED AND LOTUS PIER FELL bc you just HAD to play hero and save lwj?? and it wasn't enough! you HAD to play hero and SAVE THE WENS too, which killed my sister!!

oh he's getting really mean here

he's like, how generous you are wwx! letting wn wander the entrance of lotus pier and letting lwj offer incense!!

the minute jc started his rant, wwx cast his eyes to the side, again just enduring everything jc is throwing at him

oh but now jc starts in on lwj again

he's like, lwj, the great second jade, ignoring his reputation to side with wwx, your brother and uncle must be so proud

wwx: JIANG WANYIN!

wwx shouts at him

he's shaky and almost panting here.

wwx: apologize this instant.

jc: apologize? why should i? bc i insulted your great friendship?

THIS WHOLE ENCOUNTER IS A SHIT SHOW AND IT HURTS.

wwx just loses it here and grabs jc by the collar of his robes and gives him a shake

wwx: ARE YOU DONE?

and jc is still the little brother, you know, so obvs he does not back down here, he's not intimidated at all

jc: LET'S FIGHT THEN. should i be afraid of you two?

wwx's breath is all shaky and he's trembling and he would've given into jc's demands for a fight anyway but then he sees jyl's nameplate

and he must remember how upset jyl would get every time they fought

ME TOO, JYL, ME TOO. I HATE THIS, I HATE THIS, MAKE IT STOP

so he lets go of jc and stumbles back. he's looking very weak right now AND I’M VERY CONCERNED

lwj, obvs, catches him by the arm when he stumbles

lwj: wei ying

wwx: lan zhan, let's go

lwj agrees and the two of them turn and leave the shrine, lwj still gripping wwx's arm and providing support bc wwx is NOT looking good what’s happening to my sunshine boy, somebody fix this RIGHT NOW

BUT JC IS LIKE A DOG WITH A BONE BC HE JUST STORMS AFTER THEM, HE WANTS HIS FIGHT

he freaking leaps across the little lotus pond and lands before them, blocking off their exit

he starts antagonizing wwx, and he grabs wwx by the collar now, and again, wwx just takes it BUT LWJ DOESN'T

lwj slams his hand around jc's wrist (the one that's grabbing wwx), WRAPPING HIS FINGERS AROUND JC'S ZIDIAN, EVEN

lwj: let him go

holy crap. Stone Cold. LWJ'S STARE IS STONE COLD, AND HE TIGHTENS HIS GRIP ON JC'S WRIST

god damn, if lwj ever looked at me like that, i'd drop to the ground and beg for forgiveness. i'd be scared witless

when jc makes no move to let go of wwx, lwj releases his wrist and hooks his arm under jc's forearm and shoves upward to FINALLY break jc's hold on wwx

wwx stumbles at the force of it and his nose starts to bleed

MY POOR PRECIOUS SUNSHINE BOY LOOKS SO WEAK AND OUT OF IT!!

lwj looks at him, eyes wide with worry

lwj: wei ying!

even jc looks concerned (i would even say scared, tbh)

wwx reaches up and wipes his nose; he's not steady on his feet AT ALL

wwx: lan zhan, let's go.

lwj: okay

and he immediately starts to leave, practically dragging wwx with him bc wwx is barely able to stand at this point

lol, lwj shoulder checks jc as they walk past him

but jc is a stubborn bastard and brings out zidian and whips at their retreating backs

brief moment here to admire how FREAKING COOL THE ZIDIAN IS OMG,

*GRABBY HANDS* I WANT ONE OF MY OWN SO SO BAD.

IT'S A SNAKE BRACELET!!

THAT TURNS INTO A WHIP!!

A PURPLE WHIP!!! OF LIGHTNING!!!!!!

LITERALLY NO ASPECT OF THIS WEAPON IS UN-BADASS

so jc whips purple lightning at them but the hit never lands bc lwj swings his still-sheathed bichen and bats that attack away like nothing

but as he does that, wwx starts to fall

lwj spins around and AUDIBLY GASPS, eyes wide with worry again, as he watches wwx lose consciousness.

he dives forward and catches his soulmate in his arms and cradles him gently

jc doesn't see this happen and swings right back with another lash but wn swoops in out of nowhere to take the hit instead.

AND HERE WE'RE GONNA GET THE BIG REVEAL OH GOD I'M NOT READY

jc is all who let you in, how dare you?? and whips wn again

BUT WN WILL NOT STAY DOWN, NO SIR

HE'S GOT STUFF TO SAY AND BY GOD, HE'S GONNA SAY IT

he offers up suibian to jc but jc whips him and sends him flying again

Wn gets right back up goes back to offering the sword to jc, DEMANDING HE UNSHEATHE IT

AND IN A FIT OF FURY JC PULLS AT THE HANDLE AND SUIBIAN COMES FREE

SHOCK, UTTER SHOCK ON HIS AND LWJ'S FACES

(also YIKES jc nearly sliced out wn's eyes with the force of his unsheathing of siubian. he obvs didn't expect anything to come of him pulling at the handle)

GOLDEN CORE TRANSFER REVEAL!!

FLASHBACK to wn's part of the story

we see wn holding an unconscious jc and wq is telling wwx to come out from where he was hiding behind a convenient boulder

and we see wwx give the go ahead to start the golden core transfer

back to the present, jc looks like his whole world is a lie

bc it kinda is

I'm still kinda mad that wwx never told him anything.

like, i get why he didn't and i sympathize but informed consent in medicine and surgery is kind of a big deal!

and then omg, we got a close up shot of lwj's face

his eyes are wide and shiny and his jaw is dropped open just a bit. HE IS SHAKEN TO THE CORE

HAHAHA GET IT? THAT THING WWX DOESN’T HAVE ANYMORE?? Oh god i’m sorry that was AWFUL

he turns his gaze back to wwx, who is still resting gently in crook of his arm

i love the camera angle here btw

the scene is at a slant, with the white of bichen's handle, and the white of the flowering tree behind them filling all of the right side of the screen

it makes the dark bundle of wwx and the dark flow of lwj's hair more stark

the slant of it really emphasizes how the whole of lwj's attention is on the man in his arms

And how his whole world is off its axis at this revelation

god lwj is really just letting his whole heart pour out of his eyes as he watches wwx

jc and wn are arguing loudly in the background but lwj makes NO INDICATION of hearing ANY of it

now we get to watch the emotional confrontation between jc and wn

lwj finally looks back at them when wn starts reciting details that no one outside of jc would have known unless they were there themselves

another flashback as wn describes everything in excruciating detail

oh this line gets me every time

wn: the reason you thought it was repaired was because of my sister, the best doctor in the wen clan of qishan, Wen Qing

WN LOVES HIS SISTER SO MUCH. HE WAS SO PROUD OF HER

AND HE LOST HER. HE DOESN'T HAVE HER ANYMORE

GOD DAMN IT, SHOW, LET THESE BOYS KEEP THEIR SISTERS

and now we go back to lwj, gazing soulfully at wwx and a single tear rolls down his cheek as it really hits him what exactly wwx did, what wwx gave up

wn is going off on jc, like, didn't he ever wonder why wwx never picked up the sword again?

wn looks hardcore here tbh.

we cut back to lwj, who is now holding bichen tightly, and boy, he's got his jaw clenched so hard.

at least until he looks back down at wwx, and his mouth softens as more tears drip down his face

flashback to when jc first found wwx after the burial mounds, and a series of flashbacks of every time jc brought up wwx's lack of suibian and wwx brushing off his questions

THEY SHOULD'VE JUST TALKED IT OUT, MY GOD, THEY COULD’VE SPARED ME ALL THIS PAIN IF THEY JUST TALKED

another flashback to that time that jc pushed wwx and wwx fell hard to the ground and jc thought he was just drunk

I AM DONE WITH THESE FLASHBACKS, THX. CAN WE NOT, ANYMORE? IT'S HURTING TOO MUCH

and we also keep getting shots of lwj's face, STREAKED WITH TEARS

HE'S GOT A TEARDROP ON THE TIP OF HIS NOSE

ALL OF THIS IS PAINFUL

PLEASE STOP

oooh, lwj's mouth twists into a firm scowl and he slams bichen on the ground with a loud CLANG

this is too much for him too! he's furious, he's had enough of hearing how wwx suffered for jc

so he scoops up wwx, carrying almost all of his weight, as he walks the both of them outta there

wn leaves suibian with jc and tells him to have anyone else try to unsheathe it if he doesn't believe him

jc doesn't want it. he doesn't want it at all.

he desperately wants it to be untrue

AND I CRY A RIVER FOR MY YUNMENG BROS

WE'RE ON A BOAT NOW

UNCONSCIOUS WWX SPREAD BACK, HELD LOVINGLY IN LWJ'S ARMS

Now we get some lwj & wn bonding time where they discuss a-yuan! (after lwj promises not to tattle on wn to wwx)

AHHHHHHHHHHHH!! WE'RE GETTING A FLASHBACK FROM LWJ

LWJ IS ENTERING WWX'S LAB CAVE THING, ALONE, FRANTICALLY SEARCHING FOR WWX

lwj: on that day, when the wen clan were captured and killed, i went to the burial mounds to seek wei ying but discovered a-yuan instead

we see him find a-yuan, who is unconscious and clammy.

lwj immediately drops to his knees beside him and checks his wrist, then presses the back of his hand to a-yuan's forehead

oh, lwj's hand is all roughened with dirt. That’s very striking, for some reason.

he purses his lips making a split-second decision, and scoops a-yuan up

lwj: he was hiding there for so long that he had a fever and was severely ill

wn figures out that the fever is probs why lsz doesn't remember anything, and hasn’t mentioned wn at all. lwj looks surprised

lwj: didn't you tell him?

wn: about his birth origin? he's happy now. knowing too much about the past and remembering something heavy, would make him less happy than now

HE'S SUCH A GOOD PERSON

WHY DO THE BEST OF THEM HAVE TO SUFFER SO?

lwj: sooner or later, he will know

and wn doesn't deny it. he's like, yeah, sooner or later. just like master wei and jc with the golden core transfer.

at this lwj looks back down at wwx

lwj: is it painful?

the way lwj's throat bobs before he asks tho.

like he's forcing himself to ask, bc he needs to know even if he already suspects the answer.

He needs to know even tho knowing will hurt. he's steeling himself against the pain already.

wn: what?

lwj: taking out the core, is it painful?

wn: you won't believe me if i say it's not, right?

lwj: i thought wq might have some method

he sounds desperate, hoping against all odds that it didn't hurt wwx as much as he suspects it did

and here wn explains that wq wanted to ease the process, make it less painful, but due to the nature of the procedure, she couldn't use any anesthetics

wn: the one who donates the core has to be awake the whole time

THE WHOLE DAMN TIME

HE HAS TO BE CONSCIOUS TO WATCH IT GET CUT OUT OF HIM AND EXPERIENCE THAT CONNECTION SLOWLY BE SEVERED OTHERWISE IT DOESN'T WORK

HOW MESSED UP IS THAT OMG, HOW MUCH TRAUMA MUST THEY PUT MY POOR SUNSHINE BOY THROUGH

lwj: awake?

HE SOUNDS HOARSE AS HE SAYS THAT

wn: two nights and one day. he has to be awake

MY SUNSHINE BOY, MY BEAUTIFUL SUNSHINE BOY SUFFERED SO MUCH

lwj's lips purse briefly. he's staring at his wei ying

lwj: at the time, what were the chances

wn: fifty percent

lwj looks at wn here with horrified disbelief

lwj: fifty percent?

wn proceeds to explain how wq didn't want to do it but wwx kept insisting that the odds were worth

AND OH MY GOD LWJ FLASHES BACK TO THEIR FIRST CONFRONTATION AFTER THE BURIAL MOUNDS, WHEN THEY FINALLY FOUND WWX AFTER 3 MONTHS OF SEARCHING

IT HURTS JUST AS MUCH AS THE FIRST TIME AROUND

Wwx must have some sort of sixth sense for knowing when Emotional Discussions are Done, bc he regains consciousness only AFTER wn & lwj finish bonding lol

he sits up, head aching, and pulls himself from lwj's embrace

I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY, BC LWJ OBVS DIDN'T MIND HAVING HIM THAT CLOSE

IN FACT even as he helps wwx sit up, you can see his hand trail up wwx's arm, grip loosening and tightening sporadically

He's def trying to prolong contact here, very reluctant to let go of his wei ying

wwx: lan zhan, how did we get out?

lwj: we had a fight

AND ~THEIR SONG~ STARTS PLAYING

wwx: i knew that jiang cheng wouldn't let me go that easily. so unreasonable.

and then he looks at lwj and hurries to assure him that jc didn't mean all those cutting remarks. that that's just how he gets when he's upset.

lwj looks off to the side, pressing his lips closed bc he couldn't care less about jc or jc's words. THEY MEAN NOTHING TO HIM

wwx covers lwj's hand with his own and very earnestly says: so don't take it seriously

BC HE HASN'T YET REALIZED THAT LWJ DOESN'T ACTUALLY GIVE A DAMN ABOUT JC'S ENTIRE EXISTENCE

lwj doesn't look him in the eye as he's told this, and his lips are still pressed together in a firm line.

he probably doesn't actually want wwx to realize just how little jc means to him.

wwx notices they're on a boat on a lake now lol

wwx: i often played here with jyl when we were children

AND HERE HE HALLUCINATES HIS PRECIOUS BEAUTIFUL KIND AMAZING SISTER JYL

Jyl: a-xian come have some lotus seeds

WWX'S EYES REDDEN WITH TEARS AND HE CALLS OUT FOR HIS SISTER

AND I'M FIGHTING BACK SOBS

WHILE JYL'S SWEET GENTLE MUSIC PLAYS AND JYL SMILES WARMLY AT HER LITTLE BROTHER

wn snaps wwx out of it

ONLY FOR WWX TO FLASHBACK TO JYL CRYING AND SAYING THAT THEY'RE THE CLOSEST THREE IN THE WORLD

WWX LEANS HIS HEAD ON HER KNEE AND SULKS ADORABLY ABOUT HOW HE'S HUNGRY

AND I WANNA DIE FROM ALL THE FEELINGS I'M HAVING

back on the boat, wwx eyes are still filled with tears and it's awful

wn is all, wwx what's wrong? and wwx shakes it off and just says he's hungry

so he yanks out some lotus pods from the lake and gives one to lwj and one to wn and one for himself

HE'S SMILING NOW, THANK GOD

wwx: it's perfect timing to be here now!

and he's happily tearing into the pod

I LOVE SEEING HIM HAPPY AND SMILING

SUCH LITTLE JOYS AND HE REVELS IN IT

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

HE SHOULD ALWAYS BE HAPPY AND SMILING.

NOTHING SHOULD EVER BE ALLOWED TO MAKE HIM SAD. NOTHING

lwj: wei ying

wwx: what

lwj: does this lake belong to someone?

LOL, HE GAVE THE POD A SUSPICIOUS LOOK BEFORE ASKING THAT AND HAS NOT TRIED GETTING ANY SEEDS OUT YET

wwx: of course not

HE SAYS IN A COMPLETELY NOT BELIEVABLE WAY

YOU CAN TELL BY HOW HE DOESN'T LOOK LWJ IN THE EYE AS HE RESPONDED AND KEEPS MUNCHING AWAY ON THE SEEDS AS A DISTRACTION

Lwj is watching like, yeah, i’m not buying it.

lwj: i heard that lakes here all have owners.

lolol wwx pauses in his chewing for a second and looks around guiltily for a bit before letting out a nervous laugh

wwx: hanguang jun, you really hear much, don't you? i didn't even know that.

he's looking at him all innocently and LWJ LOOKS BACK STILL NOT BUYING IT LOLOLOL

wwx looks away and then looks back, relenting

wwx: fine.

HE'S ALL POUTY, IT'S ADORABLE, I LOVE HIM

he sulkily tells wn to get them moving

and sulkily tosses his lotus pod at the bottom of the boat

HE'S JUST HAVING A SULK-FEST RN AND IT'S SUPER CUTE, I'M ENJOYING IT A LOT

wn starts to get the paddles to get the boat going, when lwj suddenly leans over the side of the boat and snaps up a lotus pod

he very seriously offers it to his wei ying, who is watching him wide-eyed and surprised

lwj: only for today

bc i just found out about your traumatic golden core transfer for your awful ungrateful little brother and i feel horrible that you suffered alone, he doesn’t say

bc i wish i could have done something to help but i couldn't so now i'm gonna steal you a lotus pod bc that's literally all i can do right now, he also doesn’t say

LOL

THE WAY THE CAMERA CUTS TO WN HERE CRACKS ME UP

WN IS JUST PASSIVELY MUNCHING ON A SEED AND WATCHING THAT EXCHANGE HAPPEN WITH HIS BIG BROWN EYES TAKING IT IN, WITH A VAGUE, "HUH, THAT'S INTERESTING" MANNER

wwx looks at the pod and then back at lwj before taking the pod with a nervous laugh

I am convinced that he had WAR-FLASHBACKS to that time drunk!lwj gave him roosters

He’s probably frantically trying to remember if lwj drank ANY alcohol earlier

TRYING TO CALCULATE THE CHANCES OF SOMEONE SLIPPING SOME ALCOHOL TO LWJ BETWEEN THEIR FIGHT WITH JC TO THIS BOAT ESCAPE LOLOLOLOL

he clutches that pod with both hands and gives lwj a pained smile

The exact pained smile he had when he accepted the roosters that time

LMAO WWX TURNS TO LOOK AT WN, HIS BROWS ALL FURROWED IN CONFUSION LIKE, WN WHAT THE HECK IS HAPPENING, EXPLAIN WHAT'S HAPPENING RIGHT NOW

but wn just smiles cheerfully at him

cut to the next moment where we see the boat's floor is now littered with a bunch of lotus pods and wwx is happily munching on seeds, all smiley

BUT OF COURSE I'M NOT ALLOWED TO ENJOY HAPPY PEACEFUL MOMENTS EVER

SO A GLOWY GLITTERY MESSENGER BUTTERFLY APPEARS AND LANDS ON LWJ'S OUTSTRETCHED PALM

I mean, wwx giggled happily there for a moment there!!!!! WHY CAN'T THEY LET ME BASK IN THAT FOR ONE MINUTE, GOD.

anyway, the butterfly

wwx: the paper butterfly messenger from the jin clan?

(side note to say that the butterfly messenger is actually very pretty. i like it a lot)

wwx pats lwj on the knee after the butterfly flies away

wwx: what happened? what did it say?

Lwj’s like, jgy is in yunmeng now and my brother hasn’t responded to my message...

wwx: you worry jgy would harm him when desperate?

bc wwx can tell right away when lwj is worried. BC THEY'RE SOULMATES AND THEY KNOW EACH OTHER SO WELL

And then bc my sunshine boy is a GENIUS, he remembers the deed jgy had hidden away in the secret chamber, for Yunping City in Yunmeng

he excitedly tells lwj that this is where jgy will be

lol he was so excited he tipped himself over a bit and jostled the boat so lwj had to reach out to steady him

we cut to the next scene we see people dying fabrics and our boys wander through

Wwx confirms with some random worker lady that they’re in the right place and tells lwj they should explore the city as a date for Plot Investigation Reasons

lwj nods in agreement and then wwx turns back to look at the lady and gives her THE SWEETEST SMILE, THE ONE THAT SQUINCHES HIS EYES CLOSED AND MAKES ME SWOON

BUT LOL LWJ SEES HIM SMILE AT THE LADY LIKE THAT AND IT NOT AMUSED BY IT AT ALL

oh god, just the way his eyes flick from wwx to the lady and how his lips firm up before he stalks off in a snit cracks me up

GREEN IS NOT YOUR COLOR, LAN ZHAN, I'M JUST SAYING

LET THE GUY SMILE AT ME, I MEAN AT PEOPLE. IT'S NOT A CRIME

wwx is confused by the reaction but hurries off after him

oh wwx, you dense idiot. you're lucky i love you so

now we see come random guys bully wn for no reason 😞

wwx tells them to back off but they don't listen and lwj very nonchalantly pulls out a talisman from his sleeve and offers it to wwx

wwx looks at the talisman and then back at lwj with SUCH A PLEASED SMILE

OMG I WOULD DO JUST ABOUT ANYTHING FOR HIM TO SMILE AT ME LIKE THAT

wwx: lan zhan, you even kept it until now?

AHHHHHH SO CUTE, I LOVE HIM

lwj doesn't respond but it doesn’t matter bc wwx does that squinchy-eyed smile AGAIN AND I DIE, I DIE

wwx activates the talisman which releases a whole bunch of glittery butterflies that distract the guys and allow wn to escape.

omg guys, this is the same trick lwj used to distract wen chao and wen zhuliu to escape ages and ages ago WHICH MEANS LWJ HAS BEEN CARRYING A PIECE OF WWX WITH HIM ALL THESE YEARS AHHHHHHHHH

And after that wonderful, touching revelation, the episode ends.

SO, we had lots of depressing Yunmeng Bros Feelings that made me wanna die

BUT we also at the end here get rewarded with MULTIPLE squinchy-eyed smiles from my most precious darling sunshine boy that made me wanna die but, like, in a good way

I WOULD ENDURE SO MUCH MORE FOR THOSE SMILE, NGL

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#WangXiantics #wangxian #the untamed #cql

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