#they better be airbnb guests

[hotmess-exe]

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[transfemgeorgecostanza]

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[mattatouile]

had a dream I went to a pre -season stl blues game and got shit faced off a bottle of ice cold tito's with keith tkachuk. yes. keith not matthew. dunno if I wanna explore what that says about me as a person.

[trippinsorrows]

with me + part nineteen

authors note: the infamous chapter is finally here! a lot of questions you all have asked me are finally answered. i hope it's enjoyable and worth the wait!

status: in progress // masterlist

warnings: angst (discussion of child loss), language, suggestive themes

song inspo: with me by destiny’s child

faceclaims

words: 10k

taglist: @pixiedust4000 @yolobloggers @msbigredmachine @southerngirl41 @wanderingreigns @romanreignsbae

To say your 2024 Bingo card has been filled with nothing but surprises would be the understatement of the century.

The past six months, really, have been mostly wonderful but also chaotic as hell.

And if someone had told you, way back when it was just you and Joe in your own little fantasy world, that his wife would one day text you in the middle of the night, wanting to meet and join forces to combat your apparently psycho-ex best friend, you’d laugh your ass off. Laugh your ass off harder than a guest at a Katt Williams special.

But, life is funny, and God clearly has a sense of humor, because that’s exactly what happened.

It’s also why you’re sitting on Joe’s bathroom counter at 4am as he finishes up in the shower, readying for his early flight.

“I’m sorry, it completely slipped my mind to tell you I gave her your number.” Joe shuts the water off, and you immediately redirect your attention to anywhere but him as he walks out. It’s bad enough you two didn’t have enough time to get in another session before his departure, but it’s another thing to be so cruelly taunted by your sexy ass man in all his buff, your favorite pastime on fully display but unable to be touched.

Sucked.

Rode.

All of the above.

Joe continues, and your eyes land on him just as he’s knotting the towel around his waist.

“I should have asked you before I did so, but with everything going on—”

“You don’t have to apologize, Joe.” Cutting off his unnecessary apology feels like a good move, the right move. You’re not mad at him about that at all. “I know you would have never done so if you believed she had any ill intent.” And it’s the truth, especially on the eve of this Mariah mess. “Sure, I would have liked a heads up that my boyfriend’s ex-wife would be texting me asking to meet and essentially do an interview together, but it wasn’t a necessity.”

He chuckles, looking over and asking, “what are your thoughts there?”

A heavy sigh leaves your mouth at his equally heavy question. “I don’t know. I feel torn. On one hand, it’s kinda weird, ya know? Truth be told, I always figured if by some miracle I ever spoke to her, she’d try to kick my ass sooner than she’d want to grab dinner.” You quickly add, “emphasis on try because ain’t no bitch beating my ass.”

He chuckles, reaching for his deodorant. “Well, you better not be fighting nobody with my baby in you.”

Rolling your eyes, your hand naturally rests on your stomach. “I know, I just….what do you think?”

“I think you should do whatever makes you most comfortable.”

“None of this is comfortable,” you murmur, and it’s the truth. This whole thing sucks all around. “And that’s not an answer.”

He shrugs. “I can’t tell you what to do, babe.”

“Technically, you can, but you’re choosing not to. There’s a difference.”

Joe moves over and caresses your temple, sharing quietly, “I want you and Callie to come down to Philly a few days before WrestleMania. They’ll put me up in an Airbnb. I’ll make sure it’s big enough for all of us.” 

The abrupt change of topic confuses you, yes, but there’s more excitement at the thought of being reunited with him than bewilderment. It brings a small smile to your face. “Are you sure?” Any chance to see Joe will always be taken advantage of, you just don’t want your and Callie’s visiting him at such a time to cause any sort of distraction.  “I don’t want us to get in the way. You need to focus.”

“You two could never get in the way, and my focus is exactly where it should be.” His hand snakes under your shirt, feeling your soft belly. “I also want you to come to the Hall of Fame Awards with me.”

That definitely takes you by surprise. You’ve never attended any sort of formal, public event with him before, and the WWE Hall of Fame awards is like the event. “Are—are you sure that’s a good idea?” Being careful with your words and honest with yourself, you confess, “I’m not sure if it’s a good look for you to be seen so publicly and openly with me right now. Your fans already kinda hate me.”

Limiting your media consumption has been a saving grace in all this. Not that you were big on it to begin with. However, you have read a couple articles and made the even bigger mistake of reading the comments. To say some, if not most, of the internet wrestling community have nothing nice to say about you would be putting it lightly. 

There’s people cussing you out, people saying you should burn in hell for what you did, even some saying if Joe (Roman) loses at WrestleMania, it’ll be your fault.

That last one is at least a little funny to you, because for such big fans, they sure don’t know how WWE works.

Roman’s gonna retain the same way he has for almost three years. 

Ain’t shit stopping that.

“I told you before, and I’ll keep saying it until I’m blue in the face—I don’t give a fuck what they have to say about us. I love you, and I’m going to be with you, regardless of what anyone thinks. The Hall of Fame, Wrestlemania, hell, I’ll take you in the fucking ring with me if I want to.” His defense is so strong in its delivery and conviction that it almost instantly takes away any and all reservations on your end. “And they’re not fans if they have some negative shit to say about the woman I love.”

“Well, in their defense, Mariah did a damn good job making me out to be some Jezebel.”

“That’s partially why I think you should do the Live with Jadah.” His tone and expression soften, thumb rubbing against your stomach. “They don’t know you like I do, and they don’t need to per se, but they can at least see you’re not what she’s made you out to be.” He brings his mouth to your temple, lips lingering. “They can see why I love you so much.”

“Knew you had an opinion on what you think I should do.” But, regardless, you’re thankful for him truly allowing you to decide what is best for you. And you think you have. With a big breath, you settle on your final answer. “I’m gonna do it, but not even to let people see I’m not this horrible person. I just….I haven’t really had a chance to use my voice in any of this. Like…..” You work hard to help him understand where you’re coming from. “I didn’t have a voice in the DCFS situation outside of defending my parenting, but in this….there’s a chance for me to speak my side, to be able to defend myself. And I feel like I need to do it.”

“I agree.” You’re not surprised. Joe is anything and everything, including forever supportive. “Ya’ll are gonna use my Instagram to do it too.”

“Wait, what?”

“Baby, Jadah doesn’t have any social media, and you don’t need all them damn people on your page, nor do you want that.” He’s right. You hadn’t thought of it that way. “Mariah had an audience. You get one too.” 

Fair. Very fair. “Okay.”

He taps your hip, informing. “I’ll leave you the login info." It sometimes still amazes you how much he trusts you, how easy it is for share so many things with you that are objectively personal. His banking information, his fucking social medias that are literally tied to his career.

It means the world for him to have so much trust in you.

“We’re going to Disney after Mania.” 

Joe is just full of surprises, jumping from subject to subject. “What? I thought we were going for Callie’s birthday.”

“We are, for a second time, but the first time is gonna be that Tuesday after Mania. A day for you and Callie to rest.” 

You’re still trying to settle on the fact that this man is proposing two Disney visits literally back to back when something else hits you. “Wait, the week after WrestleMania? Don’t you have to work?”

“I’ve got it handled,” is all he says, all he offers, all he provides. 

“Joe, what does that even mean? How does that work? How do you just win WrestleMania and disappear right after?” Something’s not adding up. There’s something he’s not telling you, and it pisses you off for a lot of reasons, but mostly because you just hate being kept in the dark. “Is it being written into the storyline or—”

“I’ve got it handled, okay?” His tone is exasperated, which you find ironic considering you’re the one on the receiving end of his vague ass answers. “Just….trust me.”

That’s a hard one. Not trusting him. That comes second nature at this point, but trusting him and not knowing if whatever he’s handled causes any sort of problems for him. You worry about any hits he might take sometimes because of his decisions that are usually for the sake of you and Callie.

It shouldn’t bother you, but it does, especially because you know how important his career is to him.

“What about you?” That’s your biggest concern. This man has been ripping and running for what feels like months. He deserves a vacation. He needs a vacation. If he’s gonna be off for a couple days at least, why not use them to recharge? “You need to rest too, Joe. I can tell you’re exhausted, baby. There’s no need for us to go twice. We can just stick with May for her birthday.”

He shakes his head, preparing a guaranteed disagreement. “You’re gonna be five months pregnant by then. You don’t need to be walking around a damn amusement park while that far along. I don’t know if you’ll even want to.”

“Baby, trust me when I tell you, I could be nine months pregnant, and I’m still going to waddle my big ass around that park. I’m fighting any kid that tries to get in my or Callie’s way.”

He shakes his head, muttering, “the May visit might not happen if your ass gets us banned.”

“I can behave,” you murmur, recognizing you’re being a bit dramatic. Just a smidge. Disney has been a dream visit since you were a kid, so there's an immense amount of excitement at going.

“And why are we going twice anyway?” Eyes narrowing in suspicion, you realize and point out, “you’re up to something, aren’t you?” He rolls his eyes but says nothing. “You are. Oh my God, Joe, you’ve already done so much for us, we don’t need anything else. I don’t need anything else.”

It’s the truth, too. Going to Disney twice in one year when some people never get to go at all is absolutely not a necessity. No matter whatever he clearly has planned that requires two trips.

Joe looks like he wants to say something but decides against it. Annoying ass. “It better not have anything to do with a damn dog.” He laughs. “Especially with me pregnant now. Two kids under the age of 5 is gonna be a lot in and of itself.” Since you’re already on the subject, you add, “I’ve been thinking maybe my mom can come stay with us a little after the baby is born? So, I can have some help when you can’t be there.”

There’s something in Joe's expression that gives you pause, like he wants to say something but decides against it. “And I mean, I’d be fine with your mom coming too, I just—another adult will be great.” You throw that out, an honest thing, thinking maybe he’s wondering why it always has to be your mom and not more of his side of the family.

Although deep down, you know that’s not it.

“Of course, whatever you want.” He kisses your forehead and moves away to finish getting ready to go.

As much as you don’t want to feel annoyed, you do. This is at least the second or third time you’ve tried to broach the subject of post-baby, and he’s been elusive, borderline dismissive. 

It’s hard to tell if it’s because he’s maybe nervous about something, if he truly doesn’t understand why you’re wanting to discuss this now, or something else, but regardless, it’s annoying.

And you don’t like it.

You don’t like it at all.

———-

Things happen fast in Florida, or maybe it’s just you and the reality show that your life has been the past week or so.

Because one minute you’re celebrating an unexpected but welcomed pregnancy, and the next you’re the subject of major media articles, publications, and news segments. Followed up with being hit up by your boyfriend’s ex-wife, the same wife he had when you first started sleeping with him.

The same woman who you’re anxiously awaiting to ring your doorbell at any minute now.

The silence of the large house doesn’t help either. You're greatly wishing you could be distracted by Callie’s loud singing, running around, laughter, something. But, you asked Alexis to take her out for a few hours for you, not wanting her to be around in the event that things turn ugly.

And that’s a bit of an irrational belief on your part.

You would have never invited her over, accepted her invitation, agreed to even meet with her if there was any thought in the back of your mind that she has any ulterior motives. In a weird twist of fate, you’re both kind of in the same position, the subject of all kinds of public scrutiny. Granted, from what you have seen on social media, majority of the people are on her “side.” Some going even as far as starting and using the hashtag #TeamJadah.

And you can understand that, understand why the public would “side” with the wife versus the mistress, but it’s also based upon a shit ton of Mariah’s lies and smear campaigns that have painted you in such an ugly light.

That’s ultimately why you’ve agreed to this, agreed to this highly uncomfortable team up, because it’s the only and best way to reclaim your voice.

To reclaim your narrative.

The sound of the doorbell ringing literally makes you jump from where you sit criss-crossed on the new expensive ass sofa Joe picked out for the house. It is comfortable though, and for a second, you almost choose to stay in the comfort of the sofa versus answering the door.

But, you know that’s not an option, for Jadah to fly out on such short notice only to be stood up by the other woman.

It’s not a good look.

Clearly.

So with a deep breath and quick mental pep talk, your feet carry you to the door that you unlock and hesitate only a second before opening.

Instantly, you’re hit with two things: the sweet smell of Jadah’s perfume and Jadah herself. Right off the bat, you can’t get over how gorgeous she is. Her deep complexion is absolutely flawless and moisturized as hell, thick eyebrows that frame her almost slender facial shape perfectly. Full lips pulled back into a sly smile. She’s wearing a pair of jeans and thin sleeved top that show off her shape, both slim and thick where it counts. 

She’s as drop dead gorgeous as you imagined her to be. You can’t be attractive as Joe is without someone to match your aura. 

“Well, let no one say Joe doesn’t have good taste. You’re even prettier in person.” 

Receiving compliments from your boyfriend’s ex-wife was also nowhere on your 2024 bingo card, but clearly all projections need to be discarded at this point with how many stunners have happened.

“Thank you.” It’s strange. You’ve always been super good with compliments, taking them at face value, because you know that you’re pretty, always having the high self-esteem to recognize as such. But, hearing it come from her of all people feels a little…..off. Like, she shouldn’t be complimenting you. “Umm, come in, please.” 

She does so, walking and looking around, almost inspecting. “This place is beautiful.”

All of the compliments are throwing you. It’s not what you were expecting. Then again, you’re not sure just what you were expecting. 

“Thanks. Do you…want some water or something?”

She shakes her head, “I’m good, thank you.” Jadah gestures with a manicured finger between the kitchen and the living room. “Preference?”

Shaking your head, you leave that up to her. “Whatever you like.”

She nods and heads into the living room, sitting down on the sofa where you just sat, anxiously awaiting her arrival. Wordlessly, you follow suit, sitting on the sofa opposite of her. 

“Thank you for agreeing to this,” she says, placing her purse on the coffee table. “I know me reaching out must have taken you for a loop.”

“A little.” A lot. But, she doesn’t need to know that. “I—I can understand why. I’m so sorry you got caught up in all of this.”

“One thing you don’t have to do is apologize. For any of this. For anything. From what Joe told me, this girl is just psycho and has some weird obsession with trying to ruin your life.”

Scoffing bitterly, you can’t find a point to disagree with. “That sounds about right….”

No one says anything for a good, solid minute. Or two.

“Okay, why don’t we get the awkward part over.” Her voice takes on a new tone, one similar to boredom and insouciance. “We both dated and slept with the same man. I happened to be married to said man when you started sleeping with him, but that shit doesn’t even matter, cause you already know what our deal was.”

The deal…..

No, you have no idea what the deal was. That’s part of why you’re happy to finally be talking to her, because you have so many questions. Granted, that’s not the reason she’s here in the first place but still.

Your facial expression must give away the confusion because Jadah’s indifferent tone shifts to something else, something more serious. “Y/N…..how much do you know about my marriage to Joe?”

It’s a bit difficult for you to navigate how honest you should or shouldn’t be with her. She’s a stranger for all intents and purposes, but given why you two are now even sitting across from each other, maybe honesty is the best option. “He’s never really said anything about you or his marriage, and I won’t lie to you, it’s not like I’ve made a lot of effort to find out.”

There’s a part of you that still struggles with a level of guilt for the intentionality you had at the beginning of dating Joe to not ask about his wife, to pretend that you didn't see the wedding band on his finger.

Avoidance makes justification a hell of a lot easier. 

She chuckles, gaze settling on her lap. “I shouldn’t be surprised. Joe’s always been a good man. He was probably trying to protect me, protect my privacy.” Jadah shakes her head. “The irony, huh?” She leans forward, hands on her knees. “Alright, we’re doing this.” She seems to be speaking more to herself than anything, and you get it fully. You’re still giving yourself mental pep-talks just sitting across from her. “I’m gonna tell you the truth about us, but I’m telling you now, certain things Joe, even with how much he clearly loves you, may never talk about. Really, it’s years of therapy that’s why I can talk about it now.” On one hand, the warning is appreciated. On the other hand, it only increases your anxiety at whatever you’re about to hear. “I also have this thing where I use dark humor to cope with heavy shit, so just pretend like you don’t notice.”

The conversation with Kaylah in Vegas returns to the forefront of your mind, and you start to feel bad for opening the door for Jadah to have to revisit a clearly painful past. But before you can protest, she starts sharing.

“Joe and I met in college. I was 20, going on 21, and he was 22. He was playing football, I played soccer. I thought he was attractive and vice versa. We had a class together, and I approached him first. Next thing I know, we’re fuck buddies. It wasn’t romantic. We didn’t go on dates. He didn’t want that, and neither did I. It was just sex.” She says it so simply, so casually, and for a second, your mind goes towards comparisons. That’s kind of similar to how it was with you and Joe at the beginning. Just all about sex.

“Well, like two dumb college kids, we were having unprotected sex, and we both know what can happen there. I ended up getting pregnant. And this….this is where shit gets bad, because both his family and my family were of the belief that because we were having a child together that we should get married, so guess what we did?” She rolls her eyes, leaning back into the sofa. “I think that might have been our first mistake.”

A mistake….

Joe has also made a comment at least once or twice insinuating he viewed the marriage as a mistake. Had stated they initially married for the wrong reasons, and hearing the full story, you sort of agree. 

It’s such an outdated belief that two people need to be married in order to have a child.

“We did it, we got married. My family is in real estate, so we moved into an apartment they owned off campus and prepared for the baby. That was really the only time we talked and interacted. When it had something to do with the baby. And looking back on that, I can see now that even if we wanted it to work, it wouldn’t have. I felt nothing for him outside of the fact that we were having a baby together, and I know he would say the same because we discussed as such when we finally decided to get divorced. But, I’m jumping ahead of myself.”

Slowing down would be wonderful, because this is a lot for you to take in and digest. Jadah sounds like she’s essentially stating she never loved Joe, never had feelings for him. And it seems like he felt the same way, like they were only trying to make it work for the sake of the baby and their families.

She’s quiet for a second, and you already know the next thing that’s about to come out of her mouth. “There’s—there’s no easy way to say this, so I’ll just say it.” Another pause. “We lost the baby. I–I had a stillbirth. I was just about 8 months along. I—grief is so damn weird, because some days I’m okay, and then others, I feel like it just happened.”

Shaking your head, you advise gently, “Jadah, you don’t—”

She lifts her hand, stopping you as she explains, “today….today is an okay day. I’m….I’m good.” And you hope, for her sake, that she’s being honest with both you and herself. The last thing you want is to unintentionally trigger her. “We coped the only way we knew how at the time: avoiding each other and having sex when we weren’t avoiding each other. Both of which were unhealthy, one of which resulted in me getting pregnant again. But, I—I ended up miscarrying.”

That….that you especially weren’t expecting to hear. The loss of one child seems unfathomable, but the loss of two children is just so wrong. Like, it shouldn’t be allowed to happen. No one deserves to experience that kind of grief, and while your heart aches for Jadah, it’s hard not to think mostly about Joe.

To think about how that kind of experience had to have torn him up. How could it have not?

“After that miscarriage is when we tried to make things work, tried to actually be a real couple. It was mostly on my end but also that loss was the first time we actually tried to heal together instead of separate. I did most of the initiating, and I can be honest with myself now in admitting it was mostly because I wanted to try again. I wanted to try to have another child.” Her attention is mostly focused on her lap as she recalls what had to have been one of the most difficult times in her life. “Through therapy, I learned that I thought if I could finally just have a child, my grief would go away. Obviously, that’s not how that works, and I learned the hard way because I did get pregnant again, but I….I also ended up miscarrying again.” 

Words. There are none to properly describe what’s going through your head right now, the emotions all circulating throughout your entire body. Tears brim your eyes listening to this heartbreak. You have such a tremendous amount of compassion and sympathy for the woman sitting across from you.

For the man not before you currently but you’d give anything to be able to hold and hug right now. You had no idea he’s been through so much, lost so much, and yet he still stands tall, forever being your backbone.

Being your saving grace. 

“That was the last time Joe and I were ever intimate,” she continues, dabbing at her eyes. “He refused to touch me unless I got on birth control. Said he didn’t want to see me go through that anymore, and I believe him. But, I also don’t think he could handle another loss either.”

You’re not sure anyone could handle that kind of loss a fourth time. 

“I was the one who cheated first, but it’s hard to call it that when I nor Joe ever really saw our marriage as real. It was legal, yes, but he never loved me, and I never loved him. We had love for each other, but we weren’t in love with each other. And I think the little we did feel was because of our shared losses.”

This almost feels like a discussion that needed to happen in separate sessions, because it’s so much to take in. You’d always wondered about this marriage, wondered what the real story was, but hearing that real story almost has you wishing you would have never asked. It’s just all so heavy.

“And then he started becoming more famous and up there in the WWE. I don’t need to tell you how crazy his schedule can be. I barely ever saw him. We essentially became roommates. He did his thing and who he wanted, while I did my thing and who I wanted.”

It’s hard on you hearing all this, for obvious reasons, but there’s also a part of you that is grieving for different reasons. Grieving what maybe you and Joe could have been if you knew all of this. Knew his wife wasn’t the high school sweetheart turned wife, knew he wasn’t going home and playing house when he wasn’t in your bed. You always just assumed this was the case, the few times you even allowed yourself to think about him being married. It was more toward the end of your relationship as you realized you needed to start being honest with yourself about your relationship with him.

“I know for a fact Joe never initiated a divorce because he felt like it was wrong. Like it was wrong for him to leave me because I couldn’t give him what he wanted, a family. I can’t speak for him, but I’d bet that’s why he didn’t divorce me even when he met you. Because he’s a good man who still felt a sense of loyalty to me because I had tried to give him a child. I just….I couldn’t.”

Your chest tightens at her words. Did she just….. “Joe wanted kids?”

Jadah is quick with the response, reiterating. “He always wanted to be a dad. Even with our first pregnancy, we were both nervous and young, but he told me that he wanted a big family because he came from one.”

It’s getting harder and harder to keep the tears at bay. You hadn’t the slightest clue fatherhood was something Joe always envisioned for himself, something he always wanted. It makes sense, it makes all the sense now why he reacted so strongly as he did when he found out about Callie. The way he looked at you with such love and appreciation on Christmas when you apologized for not getting him anything, the way his eyes fell on Callie is he calmly told you that you already did.

A child. 

You’d given him a child, something he always wanted but could never have.

Shaking your head, you admit aloud but gently, “I didn’t—I didn’t know that.”

“Do you know what Joe told me when we finally realized we needed to just file?” She doesn’t wait for a response, most likely already knowing what your answer will be. “He said he was never supposed to be with me, because he was always supposed to be with you.” A tiny gasp leaves your mouth. “And he’s right. Joe never spoke about me the way he speaks about you, the way his eyes light up, the smile on his face…... He was never in love with me, because his heart was always supposed to be with you.” Any effort to refrain from crying is null and void. “And I’m happy for him. I truly am. I couldn’t give him what he wanted, and that’s okay, because you have.”

Her comforting you is the last thing that should be happening, but it’s exactly what occurs. She reaches over, placing her hand on top of yours.

“Y/N. I don’t hate you. I don’t think you’re a whore who ruined my marriage. That marriage was a sham from the beginning. If anything, I was more upset at you when Joe told me about Calista. I was upset because I wish you had told him from the beginning that you were pregnant. We could have gotten divorced sooner, and he could have finally experienced fatherhood. I could have finally figured out what I want in life.”

Sniffling, wiping at your eyes, “All this time…..I thought that I had been that woman, that I took him from you. That’s why I didn’t tell him about Callie, I thought—I felt like it was wrong, wrong because he was married.” It’s that along with your unaddressed daddy issues, that whole trauma, but while Jadah is relatively open with you about her struggles. You’re just not there yet.

“You can’t take what never belonged to me. I’m able to admit now that I never had Joe, and to be honest with you, I never really wanted him.” She frowns almost, continuing to share more with you than you ever expected her to share. “I wanted to do humanitarian work after college, and I didn’t do that because I was too busy living my life the way everyone said I should. I don’t blame Joe either. I guess I just wish all three of us didn’t have to wait so long to finally have what we wanted.”

In a strange sort of sense, all three of you are victims of some type of circumstances, different in various ways but still victims. 

“Are you….are you happy, Jadah?”

In all that you’ve heard her divulge, a no wouldn’t surprise you. She’s such a strong woman, but in the midst of all this, you getting Joe, Joe having you, where’s her happy ending?

“I’m bisexual.” It’s such a strange first initial response, one that you’re not sure how to reply to or take. Not that you’re judging at all. Good for fucking her. But, where is the relevance?  “It’s not a secret, either. I’ve been out since I was in middle school, but I’ve been in a relationship with this amazing woman for almost a year now, and it’s with her I’ve realized I just tend to form deeper connections with women than men. Especially emotionally. It’s gotta be why I never felt anything for Joe, because we both know that man is objectively gorgeous, insanely sweet, and the D is fire.”

That makes you laugh, the first in the midst of this heartfelt conversation. “You’re not wrong about that.”

“But, she’s amazing, and we’re so happy, so yes, I am more than happy.” Her eyes light up the same way you’re certain she’s seen with Joe when he talks about you. “But, you know what will make me happier?” She announces with attitude and determination. “Getting on Live together and blowing up this bitch whole spot.”

Another laugh that’s followed up with. “I’d rather beat her ass, but this is second best.”

“I mean, we can do that too. I don’t really know how to fight, but I’ll cheer for you on the side.” 

There’s more laughter as you realize Jadah has that dry sense of humor that can have you dubbed over in tears from the humor, meanwhile she’s got a straight face the whole time. 

“I wish, but I can’t be fighting in my condition.”

It leaves your mouth before you even realize what you’re basically confirming, and before you can freak out, scolding yourself for being so insensitive, Jadah is already two steps ahead.

“Seriously? Congratulations!” Her smile is just as genuine and happy as all the outdoors, as she explains. “Y/N, just because I can’t have kids doesn’t mean I can’t be happy for people who can. I know Joe must be over the moon happy.”

“He is,” you answer with a matching smile, hand going to your stomach. “I’m really happy I got to meet you, Jadah. I think….I think we both needed this.”

There was something so healing about all of this, some sense of solace and closure that feels like it’s been provided for the both of you. Her being able to talk this out and be honest about her feelings, and you learning that maybe, just maybe, your relationship with Joe was never wrong in the first place.

Because it was always supposed to be.

“I agree.” She squeezes her hand. “Now, let’s get started on our strategy for this Live, cause I’m ready to shut that ex best friend of yours fifteen minutes of fame down.”

———-

In another life, you and Jadah could have been the best of friends. 

There’s such an ease that comes with talking to her. Not only is she just as laid back as Joe promised, but the bitch is funny as hell. The strategizing your game plan for the Live is filled with her dry humor that almost has you in tears at one point. And it amazes you how someone who’s been through so much can still find it in her to laugh, to still be filled with so much joy.

It’s admirable. 

And maybe there’s a way where you can be friends of some sort, because there’s truly no ill feelings towards her on your end. You’re also almost certain it’s the same for her as well, but right now, the focus is on this Live. 

Well, sort of.

“I definitely think the cool tones will really compliment the white theme of the house. You guys don’t plan to paint, right?”

Joe never mentioned that Jadah is an interior designer, not that he needed or even had a reason to, but it definitely comes in handy considering you have this big ass house to decorate without a lick of knowledge about decorating. 

It didn’t take long to figure out how you’re going to tackle the Live, and you two even got your iPad set up in the kitchen, deciding that’s where you would hold it. She even set up the practice live so you two could familiarize yourself with the layout before actually going live.

So with that out the way, it only took one question from Jadah about designing for her to be assisting you with some options for different rooms in the house.

“No. Joe hasn’t mentioned anything about it.” You then remember. “We are getting a mural painted in Callie’s room. I guess Joe knows someone.”

“Oh, that’s awesome.” She beams, asking, “what’s the mural gonna be?”

Smiling, you answer, “disney. She loves Disney.”

“Y/N…..do you….do you think I could meet her?” She quickly adds, almost as if she’s nervous about even asking in the first place. “I know you probably need to talk to Joe first, but—”

“Of course, you can meet her.” There’s no need to think about it, no need to talk with Joe about it. “I was actually going to ask you if you wanted to meet her. She’s out with my best friend right now, because I didn’t want her overhearing our Live, but I’d love for you to meet her.”

She seems so moved and appreciative of this. “Thank you.” She motions down the hall, “you don’t happen to have any food, do you?”

Laughing, you answer. “Girl, I was just thinking we need to get this Live done, cause I’m hungry.”

It’s not too surprising on your end. In the past few days, you’ve noticed your appetite increasing, a strange symptom to have so early on in your pregnancy. Annoying, too.

“Well, let’s pig out on snacks, and maybe we can get actual food later,” she suggests. You’re down for that, thinking about asking Alexis to stop and pick something up on her way back to the house with Callie. 

“Sounds good to me.” She then looks around, noticing the speakers located throughout the house. “Do those work?”

Already knowing where she’s headed, you pull out your phone, opening up Spotify and reaching it to her. “What’s the vibe?”

Jadah sucks her teeth, taking the phone. “Girl, you already know.”

She moves her fingers around the screen before music starts to play.

Knuck if you buck boy

Knuck if you buck boy

Knuck if you buck boy

“Oh my god, you taking it way back.” And it’s so appreciated, cause this always has been and always will be your song. It’s aptly appropriate as well.

“We gotta be in the zone.” She’s dancing along the way to the kitchen, tossing you your phone as she walks backwards. “You still remember Princess verse?”

Is water wet? “Don’t play with me.” Making it to the kitchen, you’re barely able to open the cabinet where the snacks are before the verse starts.

Yeah we knuckin' and buckin' and ready to fight

I betcha I'm'a throw dem thangs

So haters best to think twice

Word for word, you don’t miss a beat, and Jadah is right there with you, dancing and playfully twerking to the soundtrack of every middle school fight back in the Y2K era. 

The two of you share a laugh at your silliness as she forages through the cabinet for her preferred snack while you open the goldfish and glance at the iPad. Frowning, you move closer, asking, “why is the screen still on? It’s supposed to be on auto—Jadah?”

She’s distracted, caught between Cheez-Its and Pretzels, answering distractedly. “Yeah?”

“Why does this say we’re live?”

At your question, she answers half-heartedly, “it’s in that practice mode thing, isn’t it?”

That would provide a heavy layer of relief if your eyes didn’t land on the number of the corner of the screen.

The number that reads over 100,000k people are currently watching this live.

“Jadah! It’s fucking live!” She spins around, confused. “Like, we’re on Live!”

“Oh, shit,” she curses, running over and also looking at the screen. “Damn, we are.”

Panicked, you back up to the opposite counter, lecturing, “I thought you said it was in practice mode!”

“I thought it was!” She defends, shrugging and reminding you of her naivety with technology. “You should have never left me in charge in the first place! I haven’t used social media since Tom and I were besties on MySpace!”

“Oh my god.” your hand remains over your mouth as you take in the fact that this thing has just been sitting here, live for the whole wide world to sit and watch.

“I don’t know why there’s so many people here. Were ya’ll just sitting here staring at her fridge?”

“Jadah.”

“It’s a valid question!” She sucks her teeth, pulling out the bar stool and plopping down. “Well, since everyone’s here, we might as well get started.” She reaches for your phone, simply saying “music.”

Believing she’s going to turn off Crime Mob, you hand it to her, but that’s too good to be true. Because instead of silence, you’re hit with Megan Thee Stallion.

I just want to kick this shit off by saying, "Fuck y'all!"

I ain't gotta clear my name on a motherfuckin' thang

“Jadah!”

“I said we were getting started. We need to set the tone.”

“We can’t be playing this kind of music on Joe’s account though.” At least, you think so. You’re not entirely certain what exactly his public image is supposed to exemplify. But, songs about fighting and cussing people out don't seem to align.

However, she waves you off, focusing on the screen. “Hello, everyone, and welcome to this special edition Live. I’m sure most, if not all of you, recognize Y/N, thanks to a basic bitch we’re about to roast alive in this here video.” She gestures to you, and unsure of how exactly to respond or act, you simply offer a sarcastic wave. “But most of you may not know I am because I’m pretty sure there’s only a couple of photos of me online, which is the way I prefer it.” She places one hand on her chest. “I’m Jadah, the infamous ex-wife who apparently hates Y/N and pulled up ready to knuck if you buck, but we’ll get into that later.”

Feeling more comfortable after making active efforts to push away your nerves, you tease, “bet ya’ll didn’t see this one coming.”

Jadah’s face lights up with a mischievous smile. “We figured there’s so much being said about us by this delusional bitch, that it’s time we speak our truth. And I’m just gonna say right now that while we’re doing this to clear up the lies, there are some things we’re not going to touch on because it’s nobody’s business.”

“None of this is really anyone’s business,” you add, the confidence growing by the second. “It’s all really fucked up how we even have to come up here and defend our characters and talk about personal, real life situations. I never wanted any of this, never wanted to have my face be out there, to have my daughter’s face be out there.”

“And that’s the thing, too,” Jadah seems to be feeding off your energy just as much as you’re feeding off hers. “I don’t have any social media at all. I hate it. After today, I don’t plan to ever do anything like this ever again. But, it’s also the fact that people are saying such cruel things about an innocent child that absolutely disgusts me. Like, people are attacking an innocent little girl and saying that it’s in defense of me, which is so insane because none of you know the truth.” She looks over at you, asking, “mind if I start off?”

“No, go ahead, please.”

“Bet.” She claps and announces. “I’m gonna keep this super easy for all of ya’ll. First things first, I have never spoken to that Mariah person a day in my life. Have zero clue who she is. The texts? Never happened. Phone calls? Never happened. Screenshots of said messages? Never fucking happend. Why?” Jadah makes a triangle over her mouth so her voice projects. “Because I don’t fucking know her!”

“More facts: Joe and I were married, yes. We got married when we were like 21 and 22 because I was pregnant, and that’s when people still believed children could only be raised by married couples. That’s the only reason I married that man. We were never in love. Never even dated. We were just horny college kids who didn’t use protection.” 

As strange as it may be, you can tell there’s a bit of hesitation on Jadah’s end before she goes into the next part. “We, unfortunately, lost that child. And experienced some other forms of loss that I won’t get into because it’s very personal, but to make a long story short, we ended up having an arrangement. Essentially, he did what and who he wanted, and I did the same.” 

She pushes some of her hair back, continuing to explain bits and pieces that are still true but protect her from having to lay out her darkest experiences. “I don’t even consider it an open marriage, because outside of us legally being married, we never had an actual marriage. As most of you already know, professional wrestlers have insane schedules, so when I tell you he was at the crib maybe a month out of the year? I’m not even exaggerating. That man was my platonic roommate.”

There’s a small smile on your face as her humor and sass melt into her delivery after carefully maneuvering around the specifics of her personal loss. “Ya’ll are all up in arms, coming after this girl talking about she broke up my marriage, blah blah blah. But, she couldn’t break up what didn’t exist. I never loved that man. Joe is a great guy, but we never loved each other.” She gestures to you with her thumb. “This is who he loves. This is who he has a family with. And the fact that ya’ll can sit there and claim to support him and be a fan while attacking the people he loves blows my mind.”

“So, it goes without saying, Mariah lied her ass off about all of that for clicks and views. She’s a liar. And you can print that in your tabloids.”

“I also wanna clear up some things about her if that’s cool with you?” Jadah nods, and motions for you to have the figurative floor. “I need people to understand that this is somebody who I thought was my best friend, who I’ve called a best friend since I was in kindergarten. Matter of fact, we met because some boy was picking on her, and I went up and pushed him, standing up for her. I’ve always prided myself on being a loyal friend, especially to her. So for her to do all that she’s done to me has been so fucking hurtful and confusing.”

“I found out that she’s been sleeping with my very first boyfriend, the boy I lost my virginity to and dated on and off up until I was in my mid-twenties behind my back since we were teenagers.” You have no intention of stooping to Mariah’s level, but if she wants to lay out your information for public scrutiny, then you damn sure can make sure they know just who they’re believing. Know her character, or lack thereof. “Mind you, he ain’t shit either and he can go fuck himself just as much as she can. Like, it takes two, but here I am calling this girl my best friend, crying and confiding in her about all he’s putting me through, and the whole time she’s fucking him behind my back.”

“That’s so foul.” Jadah looks just as disgusted as you feel just thinking and talking about it. 

“But you know what? As fucked up as that is, that part is well with my soul because I have a man who treats me so damn good, a beautiful daughter, and a loving, supportive family. So, that’s fine. What really fucks with me though, still—” There’s an unplanned pause as emotions get the best of you, just revisiting this subject. “Fuck, I said I wasn’t gonna cry.” Taking a deep breath, you do your best to continue without breaking down in front of the whole damn internet. “What gets me is that this girl who I considered a sister, who I literally made the legal godmother of my child, called DCFS on me, made up horrific lies and stated my child was in immediate danger—”

“Oh my god—”

“They took my baby away from me and placed her with my mother, so I legally could not have any contact with my child or my mom for three days. And that may not seem like a lot of time to ya’ll, but I love my child. She’s very attached to me, and I’m kinda the same. So those three days were torture. I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t keep anything down, my chest hurt. I had to hire a lawyer, be interrogated like I’m some criminal. It was awful.” Your attempts to hold back the tears failed epically, and Jadah’s hand is on the small of your back, rubbing in a comforting motion. “And now she’s sold all these personal photos and videos of my daughter to the highest bidder, so now I worry about what kind of fucking disgusting perverts now have access to them. It’s been fucking hell dealing with girl. You all have no idea.”

Up until this point, you’ve made an active, concerted effort to keep your eyes away from the comments, not wanting to lash out or be unintentionally triggered. But, an accidental glance reveals a slew of incoming comments including hearts of all colors. 

It’s then you can’t help but to read a few, also needing to get your shit together. Crying on the internet is something you used to make fun of people for. Now, you’re in the same position.

The comments are a complete 180 from the last time you decided to torture yourself by viewing the public’s general opinion on you. 

There’s a tremendous amount of sympathy, support, and newfound understanding. For both you and Jadah, though, the majority of them seem to be aimed towards you.

A lot of apologies as well.

“And this is the kind of person you all have been deceived by. The only thing she was truthful about is that yes, I met Joe because of her. She won a contest years ago that gave her tickets and backstage passes to a Smackdown show, so she invited me, and I met him that night.” That’s probably the only thing you could ever be grateful to Mariah about, the fact that her letting you be her plus one resulted in you meeting the love of your life. “But, I’m not a whore. Not a golddigger. I’m very intelligent. I got nearly a perfect score on my ACT and my SAT back in high school. I was student body president, homecoming queen, prom queen. You look up Ms. Popularity, and you’ll see my fucking face. I have a bachelor's degree in education, I’m a licensed teacher in my state. Like, I don’t need attention from strangers nor do I want it.”

“And here’s the thing, my daughter is almost five, so I’ve been in the picture. If I was this big attention whore like she says I am, why have I not gone public or made my presence known? The only reason ya’ll even know who I am now is because I was essentially outed, but I don’t want this shit. Joe is famous. Not me. I don’t want that. I just want to live in peace and privacy with my family. That’s all.”

It’s a bit of playing with the truth, insinuating that you’ve been in Joe’s life consistently the past five years, but that’s one of the parts of this that doesn’t need to be shared on the world wide web. 

“We black and educated excellence over here. We don’t need validation from strangers.” Jadah says it better than you can as you continue to blot at your eyes, grateful the tears are drying up. “We need some church in here to lift the spirits.”

“Oh, Lord, what are you going to play now? We are about to get Joe’s account banned.”

She clicks around on your phone before the song starts playing.

We lift our hands in the sanctuary.

We lift our hands to give You the glory.

“You’re so stupid.” This laughter is so good for your soul, it’s the most you’ve done in such a short span in a while. And it feels good. “But why would you pick this damn song, knowing good and well it never ends.” Reaching for the goldfish bag on the island, you open and grab a few. 

“Y/N! Why are you eating? We are in church.”

You give her that ‘girl, please’ look, justifying. “Girl, I’m hungry. It’s snack time, shit.” You’re craving more than a snack, more like a full course meal, but Callie’s snacks will have to do for now.

“Now you’re cussing in church. Don’t drag me to hell with you, whore.” She leans closer into the phone, taunting, “you liked that one, didn’t you, Mariah?”

You almost spit out your food. “Jadah!”

“What? You are a whore. That’s why I pulled up at your house blasting Sideline Hoe by Monica in my 2007 Toyota Camry, wearing my Baby Phat bomber jacket to fight you that one day.” At this point, you’re about to piss on yourself. Jadah’s sense of humor is golden, because she’s saying all this with such a straight face. Never once breaking scene. 

You decide to play along, correcting. “No, it was The Boy Is Mine, remember?”

She snaps her finger. “That’s right. My bad. And then the second fight, it was Jolene. I played that when I snuck in your hospital room at Grey Sloan and caught you flirting with Dr. McDreamy.”

Turning your head, you try your best to hold in your laughter, but it’s impossible. 

And Jadah also breaks a bit, speaking to the phone and viewers. “You see how ridiculous and stupid this all sounds? That’s exactly how stupid majority of the shit that came out of Mariah’s mouth is. I literally just met Y/N for the first time today, this morning. And as ya’ll can clearly see, we good over here. She got her man. I have a wonderful, beautiful girlfriend. Stop being so invested in lives you don’t live.”

You start to add something else when Jadah interjects, “and let me just say this, cause I saw some people having the audacity to say this girl is ugly. Ugly where? The bitch is gorgeous. Look at her!” She gestures to you, adding, “she’s stacked in the front, and it’s sitting in the back. Shit, I would hit that too.”

“Girl, you better stop before they start making up rumors and shit about us all being poly.” Snickering at just the thought alone of that being the latest on the rumor mill, you jokingly coin it prematurely. “Roman’s Harem.”

“Roman’s Hoe House,” she suggests, and you’re nearly in tears from laughter. This bitch is hilarious. “Plot twist, everyone. This was all a publicity stunt for a new season of Flavor of Love featuring Roman Reigns.”

“Jadah, oh my god, stop.”

She lifts her hands to silence you as you lay your head on her shoulder, laughing your ass off. “We will be taking applications following this Live. If you are a woman of color with ass and boobs, please apply. Slim thick girls, ya’ll can apply too with the understanding your chances are a bit slimmer. No pun intended. Skinny girls….maybe try the Bachelor or something.”

“Jadah, you are a menace.” You are dying for her to meet Alexis. They seem very similar in a lot of ways, and it seems like they’d vibe well. Hopefully.

“Y/N, please, I am trying to build recruits for the harem.” She finally cracks, shaking her head and leaning forward to read some of the comments. She then asks you, “should we answer questions?”

That’s an easy pass, though you also know this is your one chance to really show who you actually are versus who you’ve been painted out to be. “Sure. A couple.”

Jadah gets to reading, “uhhhh, okay this one is tame. What’s the sexiest thing about Roman?”

“Jadah, how is that tame?”

“You should have seen the other one,” she mutters. Something tells you that it’s better you didn’t.

“All of him. That’s such a generic, basic answer, but it’s the truth. He’s the full package. Tall, handsome, amazing body. Insanely kind.” Big dick, not that that needs to be shared with the whole world. “I will say though, like, seeing him parent our daughter, how good and patient he is with her. That is immensely attractive. Him being such an amazing dad and partner. That shit is sexy. If you’re grown, you agree with me.”

“You better be grown if you’re watching this Live.” She’s not entirely wrong. Jadah then reads the next one. “What’s something most people don’t know about Roman?”

Looking over at Jadah, you ask, “do you wanna….”

Immediately, she’s shaking her head, admitting, “I don’t know him well enough to really speak on that. Like, we knew each other better in college, but obviously who we were in college is vastly different than who we are now.”

It really does stump you to hear her say that aloud, not that it upsets you, but just the mere fact that you spent so long viewing her relationship with Joe in one way, but in actuality, they were more strangers than anything. 

Strangers only bonded by loss.

“Ummm, a lot, actually.” You finally answer, trying to figure out how or even what to share. “He’s actually very quiet, like, borderline shy. At least when you first meet him. Once he warms up, you see more of his personality. But yeah, it’s fascinating how well Joe encapsulates Roman cause they’re totally different people.” You glance at Jadah, murmuring, “maybe one more.” 

This Live has gone on long enough, and you feel that you and Jadah touched on all the points you wanted and needed to address.

She nods, clearly searching for a good final one. A couple seconds later, she reads aloud. “What’s one thing you’d like to say to Roman’s fans?”

Damn. 

What a final question.

There’s a couple seconds you utilize to gather your words, wanting to articulate effectively and clearly. “That regardless of how you feel about me, please don’t let that change how you viewed him before you even found out I existed. Joe—sorry—Roman, no, fuck that. Joe is so damn passionate about what he does, his work is everything to him, and he does it like he does everything else in his life—with full passion and dedication.” Your eyes are starting to water again from unexpected emotionality. “I’m so proud of him and all he’s done and accomplished, and I know it’s just the beginning, so I’d love for you to continue to support him on his journey.”

“Damn.” Jadah mumbles after a minute of silence. “That was deep. We need another song—”

“Jadah, I swear to God, if you play one more song—”

“You’re going to like this one!”

“I think we’re just about finished anyway.” It’s not a think. It’s a know. Callie’s been gone long enough. You miss your baby. “What—”

Roman’s theme song plays louder than the previous songs Jadah played, and a smile is instantly on your face. “Okay, you were right.” The two of you vibe for a minute, because your man’s song really is an actual vibe.

“Alright,” Jadah laughs. “You all have been a wonderful crowd now, but we’re hungry, so we’re gonna go eat—what are you thinking?”

“Hmmm, maybe Chinese?”

“Good call.” She then focuses on the screen again. “We’re gonna go pig out, listen to some more amazing music and….yeah.” Jadah grabs you and pulls you right next to her, so you can say something too.

“Thank you for listening to our side, the truth, and please be kind. To everyone. Not just the people you know.”

“And don’t forget to send in your applications for—”

“Jadah!”

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I said I have OCD when I don't?

I (20X) don't have OCD. I do, however, have some of the symptoms, which is probably a comorbidity thing (ADHD diagnosis). The symptoms that are relevant here line up with contamination OCD.

I can be particular about "clean" things and "safe" spaces. I still live with my parents, and they're used to my habits. They know not to sit in my specific "clean" chair, to let me disinfect things with alcohol wipes before they get brought into the home, et cetera.

Right now my symptoms are relatively under control. There was a time when a brush against something I consider "contaminated" would result in me chucking any clothes that made contact in the laundry and washing any skin that it touched. I'm trying to avoid doing this when I feel like I can, to try and condition myself into being, for lack of a better word, normal. However, it still bothers me, especially when I'm feeling particularly anxious. And it really bothers me when we have guests over who don't know about my preferences and get their outside "contaminants" everywhere, which is where the problem arises.

We're going to have family over. They're flying in from a different country and will be staying in an Airbnb, but the main purpose of their trip is to visit us, so they'll be at our house frequently. This is mostly fine. My main "safe" space is my bedroom, and I would keep that door closed the whole time, and I think they would respect me enough to not enter. But I also have two "safe" furniture items in shared space -- a dining room chair and a couch (we have two in the living room).

Basically, I want to ask my family members to not sit on those two furniture items and say that I have OCD as a shorthand for "if you do this I will become genuinely distressed". I just feel like it's the only way for them to take me seriously and actually remember not to do it without me having to go into a whole explanation about my neuroses.

But at the same time, it feels shitty to lie about a having a disorder. And I'd also be doing this partially out of laziness, which I feel almost definitely makes me an asshole -- because in theory I could just keep disinfecting the chair and the couch between each visit for the couple weeks that they're going to come over for, but both of them are fabric, and it would be so much work to wash and dry them every single day. To be frank, I can't be bothered doing all that, and would rather they just didn't sit there at all. But it might also be an asshole move to tell them not to sit on one of our couches -- I mean, Christ, it's a fucking couch. It's meant to be sat on. (Even if I'd rather they didn't -- not because of them specifically, but because they'd be visiting in "outside clothes", which aren't clean. I also don't sit there if I'm not in clean clothes.)

So -- WIBTA? And if I am voted TA, any advice for how to proceed that doesn't involve having to steam-clean a couch every day would be appreciated.

[clavissionary-position]

Ikepri Rooms Ranked By How Expensive They'd Be As Hotel/Airbnb Suites

1. SILVIO

Listed in the dictionary as the extreme antonym of a cheap room. The type that requires reserving years before in advance because nowhere on earth will you get a better view of dolphins porking. And forget about sheets being washed daily, they get completely replaced three times a day. You feel like a billion dollars after one night's stay, which is great because you've surely spent half that amount on said stay.

2. JIN

The reason this ranking exists. Luxury walls, flooring, bedding. Other hotel suites wish they could be Jin's room. Catching your reflection on any of the surfaces automatically increases libido. The sheets are infused with heady compounds commonly found in massage oils. You can see the mini-bar no matter where you're standing in the room. The fucking complimentary lollipops.

3. YVES

The crown canopy alone is so iconic that it demands a premium, but who wouldn't want to treat themselves to a stay in such a chic and manicured suite? Its amenities rival any high-end spa. There's amenities for actual cats. You go in clean and come out shiny.

4. CHEVALIER

You're paying for the books and you're paying for the balcony. If you face the bookshelves it smells like roses. If you face the roses, it smells like books. It's obvious Chevalier did not put this room on the market, nor did he tamper with it to such inutile effect.

5. KEITH

The premiere suite for introverts who simp for succulents. The bright and refreshing color palette is sure to uplift your spirits, and if that doesn't do the trick, who doesn't like fiddling with an actual telescope and accidentally breaking it? The ceilings are higher than you'd find in most suites, making it perfect for taller guests. There's always a fresh galette waiting for you every day.

6. NOKTO

A room that enticingly strays into the realm of maximalism. Staying in this suite with all its souvenirs and foreign effects lets you feel like a globe-trotter while you're getting ravished into the luxurious mattress. No single occupants allowed.

7. LEON

You're paying for the books and you're paying for the sheets. Mostly the sheets because some of the books are a little dusty. Room Service specializes in meat dishes. The windows grant one of the most breathtaking sunsets you'll see anywhere.

8. LICHT (palace room)

Despite the cool palette, it evokes calm and happy feelings. The wolf motif means lots of fur accessories. Just, uh, ignore the collar in the drawer. Even if you're into it. That's not for you. Yeah, this is probably another room that wasn't listed by its owner.

9. RIO

The view, the view, the view. For some reason Rio comes with the suite. 24/7 butler. Partway through your stay and after receiving world-world-class service, your understand why the convenience fee was so much higher than what you paid for the actual room. It's also obvious that this experience is worth far more than what it was listed for.

10. LUKE (cottage room)

A cozy stop on any b&b tour. The owner asks you do not disturb the teddy bears on display. If you find that the teddy bears disturb you, you are free to sleep facing the walls while enjoying the everpresent fragrance of honey.

11. SARIEL

The perfect room to spend an entire day in while reading or cuddling or being spooky and goth. There's spare glasses everywhere. You can see how some of the seemingly-ordinary fixtures could easily be turned into props for more adult-oriented activities. There's also ale flasks everywhere. ...Who put this room on the market? (whip-cracking sounds)

12. LUKE (palace room)

It definitely feels like you're staying in someone's personal bedroom and not an officially sanctioned suite. If you stayed in the cottage room before this, you might even think one of the teddy bears followed you. Well, that's just what they do.

Unlisted properties ranked:

1. CLAVIS (treasure and contraband room)

A national secret too dangerous to list. Expensive based purely on the illicit contents and sheer volume of shovels, which apparently add up.

2. LICHT (cottage room)

A national secret too secret to list. Also if "Simple and Clean" was a physical room. No one should know it exists, even though everyone probably knows it exists. If it were on the market, it'd be impossible to book. It's so picturesque it makes you want to cry. Most of the hypothetical extra charges on the hypothetical bill go toward maintaining the field of flowers surrounding the property.

3. CLAVIS (palace room)

A national secret too dangerous to list, but there have been rumors that you can stay for free if you manage to get past all the locks and traps and tell the owner how much you love him.

4. GILBERT

A national secret too dangerous to list, and there have been rumors that it undergoes regular renovations ever since the owner got engaged. It's the kind of room that makes you think "yeah, that'd probably be expensive as hell to stay in," but it seems the owner doesn't care for pricing things out of the reach of the masses, so that's why it's ranked so far down. If the room were available.

a/n: Thank you for reading. I took some inspiration from the modern headcanons @/leonscape has posted in the past. Also the bit about where Licht keeps his collar I believe is something mentioned in a collection event story, which I read the translation by @/hotaru987 for.

[whatthebodygraspsnot]

"A little biting never hurt nobody." pwease & ty 🖤

"A little biting never hurt nobody."

Lip and Tammi are staying in their guest room for a few days while something gets figured out at their new place. Something gas-related. Ian doesn't get it fully, but he doesn't need to. All he knows is he's not about to let his brother blow money they could be using on that on a hotel or AirBnB.

After only a minimal amount of coercion, Mickey agrees to host them. And now that they're well on their way to their fifth day of cohabitation, he's more than comfortable with having those two around again. It's like old days, but better. Because this time it's his and Mickey's own home, and this time they'll eventually be getting out of their hair.

So Mickey's adjusted. Very well. Maybe a little too well.

While Lip and Tami are going over something at the dining room table a few feet away, they're stretched out on the couch, good and cozy with something flickering on the TV.

Mickey's practically in his lap he's so comfortable - a normal position for him when they're alone, and finally making its appearance again now that Mickey's adjusted to people being in his space. Fuck, he's so at ease from that wine at dinner that he's even got a little nibble going on, soothing himself with a soft, mindless graze of his teeth over Ian's knuckle. They do this sometimes, his big hand rests against the bottom half of his mouth. Almost like he's a step away from covering it.

It's not all that crazy. Ian almost doesn't say anything. But a brief moment of awareness has him second-guessing. In protection mode of Mickey's peace, as always.

"Hey..." he says very quietly down to him, "...you care that you're doin' that...? Around them...?"

What he's doing seems to register in Mickey's brain then too, his teeth relaxing from a gentle bite. He pulls his head away to look up at him, expression easy. "There somethin' wrong with it...?"

And, "No," Ian insists, "course not..." It is routine for them, after all. He just knows how Mickey is. Doesn't want him to feel weird, is all - if a certain brother of his noticed and decided to make a stupid comment about it.

"Little bitin' never hurt nobody," Mickey murmurs then. And it's all Ian needs to hear to soothe his concern, a lazy smile working to his lips to match his husband's.

At the dining room table, the discussion is starting to heat up a bit.

But on the couch, Mickey slips right back into business. Grabs Ian's wrist and helps his hand back into place over his mouth so he can nibble on the knuckle of his pointer finger for good measure.

It's calming for him. Ian knows that. But what really surprised him over the years is how calming it is for himself too. The warmth of Mickey's mouth. The light touch of his tongue every once in a while. The easy pressure, his fears of getting his finger bit off subsiding long ago, even when he needs to bite a little harder.

He likes it. And Mickey likes it. They both like it. And they're in their own house on their own couch, so of course they're gonna do it! Mickey is so right.

The episode ends. Another begins, blasting them right away with a raunchy scene of sweaty, grinding bodies.

And it's not like they haven't been having sex while Lip and Tammi are here. They've definitely been having sex while Lip and Tammi are here. It's just that they haven't been able to honor their full potential - haven't had the space to just go apeshit - another one of their routines, but this one filled from top to bottom with creaking furniture and loud, nasty moaning.

It's their house, but that shit is just for them. So they're refraining. For now. Which means when the guy on the screen lets out a throaty moan, the camera panning over his sweaty back, Ian feels that shit right in his dick.

He's not the only one. He can feel Mickey's tongue dart out along his finger down there, tracing along it just a touch too purposefully for it to be considered mindless and soothing.

Ian lets it go. Lets him do it. Lets the moment play out on the TV, the scene feeling like it's reached the ten minute mark holy fuck, Netflix just kinda lets anything fly these days, huh?

When the camera breaks away into a different location - different people - the relief that should come with it never lands. Because they may have entered a different scene, but Mickey's settled into this new vibe and seems good and comfortable in it, his lips parting to suck lightly into the side of Ian's finger - warm and wet and pleasant.

"Mick..." he says, quiet enough that it's just for them again.

But he doesn't really know what he's saying, to be honest.

Because now that they're here - now that those lips are dragging heavily over his finger until reaching the tip, and then wrapping around and taking the whole thing into his mouth - fuck, it feels good. He maybe doesn't need it to stop, actually. This is okay.

It's their house and their couch and if his husband wants to suck on his fingers, of course he's going to! Mickey is so right.

So Ian lets him, enjoying the little thrills that uncurl in his belly as Mickey's licks between two of them and then lets them sit heavily in his mouth.

It's not a new sensation by any means, but Ian's always taken away by how fucking good it feels. Mickey's tongue is so soft... So warm... So wet and welcoming as it gently laps over the pads of his fingers, just like it does when his mouth is a little lower.

Another swirl of interest, working down through his belly and between his legs this time...

Fuck...

Okay, maybe they should stop actually. Before Ian hauls him off to bed for one of those extra loud and nasty fucks they've been keeping under wraps.

But Mickey looks so hot when he tilts his head to look up at him, his eyes pretty and heavy-lidded while he quietly sucks to the tip of Ian's fingers, and then flattens his tongue and drags it purposefully up the underside of them, spreading tingles in Ian's hand and Ian's lap.

"Jesus..."

Mickey arches a lazy eyebrow at him. Smirks as he presses his lips to Ian's wet, glistening fingers. 'You thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?' without a single word.

And yeah. They're definitely on the same page, the couch groaning beneath them as they both get to their feet, trying their best to act natural.

Or - well, Ian is at least. Mickey doesn't give a fuck.

"We're uh..." Ian motions toward the back of the house, not even pulling his brother's attention, "We're just-"

"They don't give a fuck," Mickey insists, and then starts directing Ian into the hallway with helpful shoves. "Come on."

Once their bedroom door closes, the biting gets a little harder.

[ send me a smutty one-liner ]

[topguncortez]

Merry Christmas, Baby(ies)

pairing: Jake Seresin x Shy!Wifey ➳synopsis: Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house, The Seresins were preparing for a birth to announce ➳warnings: pregnancy, child birth, c-sections, a little bit of trauma, Jake's family, a dash of angst. ➳Word count: 5.5k Opposites Attract Masterlist | Hangman Masterlist

➳ note: no, this isn't the fourth installment of the Opposites Attract world, I am still working on that (cause idk where I wanna go with it) but MERRY CHRISTMAS YA FILTHY ANIMALS:)

Since Jake was little, he had always loved Christmas. His mother always went all out, pulling out the boxes of decorations the second the last plate from thanksgiving was clean and put away. She would spend the next week decorating the house from head to toe. Garland, pine cones, lights, candy canes, and Christmas trees covered the house. Each room had its own sort of decorative vibe to it, and had its own box that went with it. Jake’s four older sisters could care less about decorating, but Jake was a momma’s boy and would spend hours helping his mom hang ornaments on trees. 

That same love for Christmas followed Jake throughout his teenage years and even to adulthood. His first deployment was over Christmas and he somehow managed to get a small Christmas tree on board and set it up in his room. He could remember his first Christmas with Y/N, and fell even more in love with realizing that she too, had the same love for Christmas. They went all out buying their own Christmas tree, and setting up their own Christmas traditions. Their Christmases seemed to get even better when they had kids. 

This year though, instead of going to Texas like they usually did, Y/N had invited Jake’s parents and sisters to San Diego for Christmas Eve. However, Jake  didn’t know that was Y/N’s plan and had already invited the Dagger Squad over for Christmas Eve as well. It sent Y/N into a bit of a panic as she looked down at her eight month swollen belly, but she put on a bright smile and said: 

“The more the merrier!” 

But now, she was slowly regretting saying that, as she looked at the house full of guests. Jolene and George had arrived on December 22nd, because Jolene wanted to help get groceries and wrap gifts for her grandkids. George would have cared less about being there so early. The next to arrive was Jake’s sister Andrea, and her husband Kyle and their kids, and Jessica and her partner Emily showed up on the 23rd, staying in an AirBnB near Jake and Y/N’s house. 

“I thought it wasn’t supposed to be this hot,” Y/N groaned as she sat down on the back patio watching the kids play with their cousins. 

“It’s not even that hot,” Jake’s twin sister, Hillary said. Hillary and Y/N hardly got along, but Y/N tried to remain civil towards her. 

“Do you need anything, sweetheart?” Jolene asked, walking out to the backyard. Part of the reason why Hillary didn’t like Y/N was because she got along somewhat well with Jolene. Jolene was almost exactly how the song described; red hair teased to the high heavens, pale skin, and electric green eyes just like Jake’s. Y/N was surprised that at least one of her kids didn’t have red hair. 

“I’m good, thank you, Mrs. Seresin,” Y/N smiled. 

“Oh baby, you have carried five of my grandbabies now,” Jolene smiled, “You can call me Jolene.” 

Y/N blushed and nodded as Eli ran up to her and climbed on the couch. He cuddled into her, pressing his face into her bump. She smiled and ran a hand through his messy blonde hair. 

“What have you been doing, baby?” Y/N asked her youngest, as of right now, son. 

“I gotta take a break,” He sighed and flopped his arms out dramatically, “Can’t keep up with Alex and Tyler and Ella and Derek and Joanie and-” 

“Hard being the youngest, isn’t it,” Andrea, Jake’s eldest sister said, “Tyler and Joanie aren’t being mean are they?” 

“No Auntie Drea,” Eli shook his head, “My legs just little.” Y/N giggled and Eli climbed back off the couch and ran towards his cousins.

“Gosh he reminds me of Jake,” Jessica said and sat down next to Y/N, “What about these two? Who do you think they’ll be like?” Jessica placed her hand gently on Y/N’s bump. 

“Maybe if she found out the gender,” Hillary mumbled and sipped her wine. 

Y/N brushed off her comment, “I think they’ll be like Jake. I think they all take after Jake in some way.” 

“Especially Ella!” Andrea shook her head with a laugh, “That girl reminds me so much of him. She even has his little half smile. And those dimples! Gosh, they are twins.” 

“Gossiping about me?” It was as if Jake had heard them say his name and he leaned over the couch. He placed a kiss on the top of his wife’s head, “How are things?” 

“She’s been complaining about the heat,” Hillary rolled her eyes. 

“You would be too if you were carrying twins and ready to pop,” Jessica said defending Y/N, “Besides, momma deserves to be comfortable. Can’t imagine what it feels like having your house bombarded like this during the final weeks.” 

“It’s because she’s a trooper,” Jake came around the couch and sat down next to his wife. He put one arm around her and his hand went to her bump. He rubbed it gently and bent down to place a kiss on it. 

“How is fixing up the nursery with dad?” Andrea asked and Jake sighed. 

Over the years, Jake had slowly started to patch up the rocky relationship he had with his father. After the birth of Eli, Jake had realized that George had hardly ever wanted to see his grandkids or talk to them, and it hurt Jake. His sisters told him that it wasn’t just Jake’s kids that George didn’t gel well with, it was all his grandkids, but Jake didn’t see it that way. George was always so kind and caring when it came to his sister’s kids, but was kind of cold when it came to Jake’s brood. So, Jake sat down with him and talked to him about how it hurt him and George had apologized. 

“Trying to tell me how to put a crib together, like I haven’t put together three in the past ten years,” Jake rolled his eyes, “It’s fine. He’s inside, probably complaining about me to mom. Which, I don’t care about anymore.” 

“Well that certainly changed,” Hillary mumbled. And Jake glared at her, “What? You used to care so much about Dad’s opinion and approval of you. Everything changed when you met. . .” 

Y/N shifted in her spot and looked down at the tea mug in her hands. Jake clenched his jaw and pulled Y/N in closer to him. He knew of Hilliary’s dislike for Y/N and couldn’t figure out why. All Hilliary ever said was Y/N was just too different than Jake, and it would never work. Jake thought it was maybe because she wasn’t at his wedding. But then again, no one was really at the wedding since they just did it on a whim. His mother and other sisters were a bit upset about it, but they forgave him for it seeing how in love Y/N and Jake were. 

“This has nothing to do with Y/N,” Jake said, “I’m too old to be begging Dad for his approval. It’s his loss for being a jerk and not wanting to get to know his grandkids.” 

“It is, Jake, and I’m sorry that he’s being like that,” Andrea said sincerely, “He’ll come around someday. Maybe once he has another heart attack.” 

“That’ll be the damn day,” Jessica laughed, “I’ve been with Emily for over fifteen years and he still asks about how we’ve had kids.” 

“Science has not caught up to the old man,” Jake shook his head. 

“He’s still ordering things from infomercials. . . you think he’s understanding how in vitro fertilization works,” Andrea added and all four Seresin kids broke out in laughter. 

— — — 

“I don’t want to wear tights!” Ella pouted and Y/N sighed. 

It was Christmas Eve and the house was already filled with members from the Dagger squad. Bob was the first to arrive like always, this time dragging along his girlfriend Maggie. He was bringing her over for the first time, and thought a perfect time to meet the whole Dagger Squad would be at Christmas. Christmas with nine aviators and their families was an interesting event. Every year they got too drunk off of Fireball and spiked Eggnog. Everyone knew that Christmas was a make or break, those who could hang with the squad got to stay. 

Jake was already down stairs with the boys, being the best host like his mother taught him to be. He was mixing drinks and creating laughs at the built in bar that he so badly had to have in the house. Jolene was getting along great with Penny, Y/N’s mom Clara and Sarah Kazansky (who Jake and Y/N always invited her and her kids to Christmas). 

“Ella, you have to wear tights with your Christmas dress,” Y/N tried again to get her six year old to put her white tights on. She wanted to try and cover the large scrapes on her knees from falling off her skateboard last week, but Rooster told her she looked cool and now she was against covering them up. 

“No!” Ella crossed her arms over her chest. 

“Fine then, I’ll tell Santa no gifts.” 

“Santa’s not real. Uncle Fanboy told me last week.” 

“Dammit,” Y/N mumbled under her breath and made a mental note to talk to Fanboy about ruining kids' dreams, “Please. Put your tights on.” 

Ella shook her head again and Y/N gave up on trying to put tights on her, knowing that this battle was one she was not going to win. Y/N waddled down the stairs slowly as Ella ran up to her dad, Uncle Rooster and Fanboy. Jake picked up the girl and spun her around in a circle. Rooster couldn’t help but chuckle at the exposed scrapes on her knees. 

“Wasn’t winning the tight argument?” Jake asked as Y/N made her way to the kitchen. 

“No, and I’m not fighting with her anymore. Even pulled the Santa card, but someone,” Y/N looked at Fanboy, ''said he’s not R-E-A-L.” 

Fanboy whistled as he picked up his drink and got off his barstool, going to both Payback and Stella. Jake chuckled and set Ella down to go run off with her cousins and friends. He moved to stand behind Y/N, running his hands over her very tight bump and frowned. 

“Are you having contractions?” 

“No,” Y/N said, “It’s been like this all day. And my back is killing me. I put the band on to try and help but it’s not.” 

“Maybe it’s back labor,” Rooster said, casually sipping his drink. Y/N glared at him, “Hey! Remember the last time you said you weren’t in labor?? Yeah, Floyd ended up catching that crotch goblin.” As if he knew he was being talked about, Eli ran by with a can of whipped cream in his hand. 

“Who the hell gave him that,” Jake said, and went to chase after the three year old. Y/N looked up to see Javy and Payback with smirks on their faces. 

“I’m not in labor. I still have three weeks to go,” Y/N said and grabbed a glass of lemonade, “This isn’t like last time and I am not about to ruin Jesus’s birthday by having twins.” 

“Would beat the bible story,” Rooster smiled and Y/N rolled her eyes. She walked towards the living room where some of the other women were. She sat down next to her mom, who was deep in conversation with Penny and Jolene about something. Dragon was sitting on the other side of her and tapped her arm. 

“What’s with Ella’s knees?” The Trace girl asked. 

“Her and Alex were seeing who could go down the hill at the park the fastest. Ella took a tumble and now refuses to wear tights,” Y/N said and Dragon stifled a laugh. 

“God she’s like Bagman.” 

“You didn’t tell them it was dangerous?” Hilliary asked and Jolene scolded her, “What? Ella could’ve gotten seriously hurt. I mean, Eli just had a cast on his arm like two weeks ago.” 

“They’re kids,” Jolene said, “Kids get hurt. They break bones in the morning and are running in the afternoon.” 

“Oh boy do they. One time Y/N was. . .” Clara fell into a story about how Y/N and her brother Thomas got into a scooter race around their cul-de-sac and crashed into each other, resulting in both breaking their wrists. 

The rest of the night went along without a hitch. Jake and George had spent all day cooking up two turkeys and a ham for dinner. Jolene, Andrea, and Jessica cooked most of the sides. Y/N tried to help, but Jolene had told her to sit and watch, not wanting her to do anything too strenuous. Even though they had cooked tons of food, people still brought dishes to share. Y/N was slightly overwhelmed by the amounts of food on her kitchen counters. But she knew how the Dagger Squad was, and knew that almost every single thing would be gone and they would happily take leftovers home. 

Jake had gotten the kids plates and set them at their own table off to the side of the main dining room. That was one thing that Jake had added when he built the house. He had put in a big main dining room that would then open up to a smaller dining room so for dinners like this, the kids weren’t completely shunned to another room and out of sight. He hated that growing up, how the kids were always in another part of the house, out of sight out of mind. Javy, Payback and their wives also liked the idea so they could see their children as well. 

Y/N let out a slow breath as she pushed the green beans around her plate and rolled her shoulders back. The pain in her lower back was gradually getting worse, and she tried to push through it with no complaint. Jake had been watching her the whole night, seeing as she asked her mother several times to rub her back for her. He knew that this was probably the early stages of labor, but Y/N was stubborn. Hell, everyone knew how stubborn she was, the birth of Eli Seresin proved that. 

“Babe,” Jake whispered over to her, putting his hand on her thigh, “What’s wrong?” 

“Nothing,” Y/N said, her voice shaky. 

“Are you sure? Are you having contractions?” 

“No,” Y/N said, and squeezed his hand, “I promise, I’m not having any contractions.” Jake nodded and leaned over to kiss his wife. She giggled into the kiss, and pulled him in close. 

“Really?” They broke apart, both looking like two teens that had just gotten caught by their parents, but in reality it was just Hilliary giving Y/N a glare, “Is that how you got into that situation?” 

Y/N looked down at her swollen belly, and ran her hand over it. Jake had had enough of his sister’s sly comments towards Y/N for the past few days. He knew how much the things Hilliary said bothered Y/N. He had spent one too many nights comforting her while she cried and asked why his twin sister hated her. He respected Y/N’s wishes on not confronting his sister, but between his dad being on him for different things and seeing his wife cower under his sister’s glare, Jake had enough. 

“What is your problem?” Jake asked and Y/N felt her heartbeat start to rise. She felt all eyes snap to both of them as Hilliary looked like a deer in the headlights, “You’ve been a bitch this whole time.” 

“Jacob!” Jolene scolded. 

“He’s not wrong,” Andrea mumbled, taking a sip of her wine. 

“I haven’t done anything to her,” Hillary pointed out, “Just pointing out that not everyone wants to see you two making out at the dinner table.” 

“That was hardly making out,” Jake scoffed, and rolled his eyes, “God, Hillary! You’ve not had a single nice thing to say about Y/N since you met her! She’s been nothing but nice to you!” Jake yelled. 

“I don’t have to be nice to her!” Hillary yelled, “She hasn’t done anything but stay at home, shoot out kids, and munch off of our-” 

“Oh,” Y/N gasped as she felt a sudden rush of warmth between her legs. She looked down at her chair and then back up at Jake who’s jaw dropped. Clara was thankfully sitting next to Y/N, and grabbed a napkin off the table to try and cover up the wet spot on her dress. Rooster and Bob stood up from their spots and ran over to the other side of the table. 

“Fucking great,” Hillary grumbled, “And now she’s turned Christmas all about-” 

“Would you shut up for a damn second!” Dragon yelled at the Seresin girl, “Are you okay?” 

“Sweets,” Jake said, and grabbed his wife’s hand. 

“It’s early,” She looked at him frightened, “Oh god.” 

“I’ll get the car!” George spoke up, and Jake and Jolene both looked at him in shock. George Seresin never had anything to do with his childrens’ birth. In fact, Jolene didn’t have him in the room during a single one of her four kids’ births. He sat in the waiting room until it was over.  

“Her bag is upstairs by the-” 

“I got it!” Jessica said, and ran towards the Seresin bedroom. 

“Val, Maggie, help me take the kids down stairs,” Stella said, standing up from her chair and over to where the kids had noticed the commotion at. There were little sounds of protest as the women corralled the kids down to the basement, but the second that Fanboy stood up and said that Santa was on his way, they all cheered and followed him to the basement. 

“What do you need?” Jake asked his wife, as Rooster rubbed her shoulders as she started to feel contractions. 

“I’d like to change my clothes,” Y/N let out a breath, “But I want to get to the hospital first.” 

“Are you gonna shoot out these two on the floor like Eli?” Rooster asked and Y/N glared at him, “Hey, I just want to be prepared in case I gotta catch a kid again.” 

“You didn’t even catch the last one,” Bob said and Y/N let out a groan. 

“Dad’s out front with the car,” Jessica said, walking back into the dining room, handing Jake the go-bag, “We’ll stay here and put the kids to bed and everything.” 

“Thank you,” Jake said, and helped Y/N to her feet. 

“Oh, they're gonna hate us,” Y/N groaned, “We won’t be here to open gifts.” 

“I will record it,” Andrea said, “And Kyle promised to dress up as S-A-N-T-A. They will be distracted. Now, go have these babies.” Andrea kissed Y/N’s cheek and then hugged her brother. 

Hillary was standing in the corner of the room as she walked Jake carefully guiding his laboring wife to the car. She never thought that the argument was going to lead to her water breaking and that fact that her nieces or nephews were going to be born early. Hillary let out a gasp as she covered her mouth with her hand. She knew the dangers of having babies early, she was a nurse for christ sake, and she knew the dangers of having twins early. Hillary somehow found it in her to run after Jake and Y/N, catching a glimpse as Rooster shut the car door and George pulled out of the driveway. 

— — — 

Y/N let out a small scream as she braced her hands on the bed, swaying back and forth gently as she worked through a contraction. Clara was rubbing her back, and Jake was holding her hair back in case she were to get sick again. Y/N was used to contractions and going through labor without pain meds. She had Eli on her bedroom floor, totally unmedicated. But these contractions were the worst she had ever felt and she was waiting until she could get her epidural. 

They had been in the hospital for a little over four hours, and it was officially Christmas Morning. Andrea had sent Jake a picture showing the three older Seresin kids were asleep in Jake and Y/N’s bed. Jake had also sent an apology to the Dagger Squad group chat, but they were all more excited to find out if they were welcoming two boys, two girls or one of each into the family. Jolene and George were sitting in the waiting room, both of them not wanting to leave their son and his wife, both too excited to meet their grandchildren. 

“God it hurts so much,” Y/N cried and Jake looked over at the contraction monitor, “Momma.”  

“It’s almost over,” Clara said, rubbing her daughter’s back. She had been there twice before to see her give birth and it never got easier to see her daughter in pain. 

“Jake, can you find the doctor?” Y/N asked and Jake nodded, running to the nurses station, “Where’s dad?” 

“Getting more ice chips,” Clara answered, and Y/N started to move to sit back down on the medicine ball. Clara grabbed a hair tie off her wrist and tied Y/N’s hair up in a bun, “Do you need water?” 

“I need a fucking epidural,” Y/N groaned as Jake walked back in, the anesthesiologist and their main nurse, Vera, behind him, “Thank god!” Jake laughed as the nurse handed Y/N the paperwork and the anesthesiologist walked her through the steps of the epidural. Even though Y/N was having twins, she still wanted to do a vaginal birth, and both her midwife and OB agreed to make that happen the best that they could. 

“We’re going to get you positioned on the bed,” The anesthesiologist said. Jake, and Clara helped Y/N sit on the side of the bed, Jake standing between her legs like he had done for the first two kids. He ran his dull fingers over her hair, scratching at her scalp lightly. Clara stepped out in the hallway, giving them some privacy as James rounded the corner. 

“Babies time?” James asked and Clara shook her head. 

“Getting drugs,” Clara said, “You know. . . these are our last grandchildren.” 

“I have faith in Carson to stop being an idiot,” James said, putting his arm around his wife, “Until then, yes, these are our last grandbabies.” Clara laughed and James kissed her forehead. 

“Deep breath, Y/N,” The doctor said and Y/N sucked in a breath and squeezed Jake’s hands as the needle went into her back. She felt that same warm sensation she had felt before and let out the breath she was holding. Jake kissed her forehead, and whispered words of encouragement as they got ready to place the epidural needle in. 

Y/N closed her eyes as she felt the needle prick her skin. Jake held her hands tightly as Y/N let out a slow breath through pursed lips, and counted down the seconds until it was over. She felt her body relax a bit as the needle was removed from her skin. 

“All done, you should feel it start to set in soon,” The doctor said, and Jake helped Y/N lay down on her side in bed. 

“Need anything else, Y/N?” Nurse Vera asked and Y/N shook her head, “You’re dilating at a good rate. Going to have some Christmas Babies.” 

“Yay,” Y/N said, giving her a smile. Jake squeezed her ankle, and rubbed her calf. 

— — — 

It was about fifteen minutes later that Y/N started to feel weird. Jake had gone to the bathroom, leaving Y/N alone momentarily. She blinked her eyes a couple times, feeling her head start to swim and her hands tingle. Something was wrong, something was very, very wrong. 

“Jake?” Y/N called out to him, and tried to pull herself out of bed, but was too weak to even raise her arm up. Jake had just walked out of the bathroom, and his eyes went wide. Her color was gone, and he could see a thin layer of sweat all over her body. 

“Sweets, talk to me, what’s wrong?” 

“I-I-” Y/N felt out of breath as she tried to reach for Jake but couldn’t even move an inch. Jake reached for the call button, pressing it rapidly. He cursed, and ran for the door, going to the nurses station. 

“Something is wrong with my wife,” Jake rushed out in a panic. The nurses at the desk quickly got up and followed him into Y/N’s room, as alarms started going off. 

“Baby B is in distress,” Nurse Vera said. 

“Her heart rate has dropped,” Beverly, Y/N’s midwife said, “We need to move. Call up to an OR.” Beverly hit a button above Y/N’s bed, and a swarm of nurses and doctors came in, pushing Jake out of the way to get to Y/N. 

“Jake!” Y/N called out to him. Nurse Vera grabbed the oxygen mask from the wall, and put it on Y/N’s face. Other nurses and techs got Y/N’s hospital bed ready to move towards the operating room. Jake tried to get close to her, but another nurse pushed him towards the back of the room. 

“Ready to move,” A tech said and Beverly nodded. Y/N looked around the room, her vision becoming blurry both from tears and from the blood rushing out of her head. She tried to reach her hand out towards Jake. 

“Jake!” She yelled a little bit loud. 

“You’re okay! Just breathe! I’ll be right there!” Jake called out to his wife. Y/N kept her hands on her belly protectively as they took her right down to the operating room. He tried to follow them out into the hallway but he was stopped, “Get your damn hands off of me, and let me go with.” 

“You can’t go with her, I’m sorry,” A nurse said, “You need to go wait in the waiting room.” 

“The fuck I am!” Jake yelled as Clara and James ran around the corner. 

“What’s going on?!” Clara asked, “Where did they take her?!” If there was one person no one wanted to piss off it would be Clara Y/L/N. 

“Your daughter’s heart rate dropped and the twins went into distress,” The nurse explained, “She’s being taken back into an emergency c-section. We will update you when we can. But I’m sorry, you can’t go back with her.” The nurse turned on their heel and went towards the direction they took Y/N without any further explanation. Jake ran his hands through his hair and pulled at the ends of his blonde locks. Clara let out a soft sob as James pulled her into his arms and kissed her forehead. 

“Let’s go wait,” James said, and put a hand on Jake’s shoulder. 

James had slowly become more of a father figure in his life than his own father ever had. He always knew what to say, and gave Jake comfort in moments like this. Jake nodded and wiped a tear from his cheek, as he followed his in-laws out into the lobby. Jake’s own parents had left to go and help Andrea prepare things for Christmas morning. He sat down in an uncomfortable leather chair with a sigh. 

Jake looked around the waiting room and saw that it was pretty much empty except for a few people. Most people were probably asleep in their beds, holding onto their loved ones as they prepared for an exciting Christmas Morning of opening gifts and spending it with their families. Jake’s lip quivered as he thought about his family. How his wife was all alone and vulnerable, being cut open and having their last babies delivered. He wanted nothing more than to be laying in bed, surrounded by his five kids and his wife in matching Christmas pajamas that were way too hot for anyone to stay in for too long. 

Jake put his arm on the armrest of the chair, and leaned his head on his fist. He knew this was going to take awhile, so he thought he might as well get comfortable and wait. He slowly fell asleep, and dreams of future Christmases with his family filled his mind. 

— — — 

Y/N sucked in a deep breath, well as deep as she could take, as she started to wake up. She wasn’t sure what had happened and everything was a blur. The lights were bright and she kept her eyes closed, as she tried to sit up, but let out a loud groan. It felt like she had done about a million crunches, and her hands went to her belly, finding that where her bump once was, was now a large scar. Tears started to fill her eyes as she tried to fill in the blanks on what had happened. 

“Sweets?” Jake called out softly, his hand going into hers. Her eyes opened and she looked at Jake, “What’s wrong?” 

“Where are my babies?” Y/N whimpered out. 

“They’re okay,” Jake said, running a hand over her hair. She looked better than she did when they whisked her away. Her color was somewhat back, and her eyes looked more alive. She tried to push herself up again, but Jake gently pushed her back down on the bed. He took the remote for the bed, and sat her up a bit. She whispered out a thanks, and then pointed towards the water cup on the table in front of her. Jake grabbed it and helped her sip from the straw. 

She gently pushed the cup away from her, “What happened?” 

“Your heart rate dropped,” Jake said, “And it caused the boys to go into distress. They took you for an emergency c-section. Everything went okay, they are resting down in the NICU.” 

“Boys?” Y/N quipped, “I have two boys? We have two boys?” 

“We had two boys,” Jake smiled and Y/N returned it with one of her own. He leaned forward and kissed his wife, “I’ll go get Nurse Vera so you can go see them.” Y/N nodded and Jake went to go find the nurse. 

It was the most painful experience ever, getting from the bed to a wheelchair so she could go see her newborn twins. Jake pushed her down the hallway, going ever so slowly to not hit anything that would jostle Y/N’s body. Clara and James were currently in the NICU nursery, making sure that somewhere was there for each of the twins. They had let Jolene and George know that they had two more grandsons to add to their family. 

“Alright, you ready?” Nurse Vera asked as Jake wheeled Y/N up to the door of the nursery, “We’re going to have you guys do skin to skin, each of you will take a twin, and then switch. We want you to try and see if they will latch.” 

Y/N nodded and Jake pushed the chair into the room. She gasped seeing the two incubators in the otherwise bare room. There was a rocking chair in the middle of them. 

“Do you want to sit in the rocking chair?” Vera asked and Y/N shook her head, “That’s alright. We will start with baby A.” Vera put on a gown, gloves and a mask. Jake stood behind Y/N’s chair and watched as Vera carefully took the newborn out of the incubator, “He is four pounds seven ounces, and eighteen point four inches. He’s your little one. Jake, I'm going to have you untie the back of Y/N’s gown and pull it down slightly, exposing her chest.” 

Jake nodded and did what Vera instructed. Y/N felt a bit vulnerable, but then Vera placed the baby against her chest, and Y/N felt tears in her eyes. Vera draped a blanket over Y/N and the baby, to keep them both warm. Jake gently caressed her shoulder and looked down at his son. He could tell that he had her nose but his green eyes, and Jake could see the faintest color of red in his hair. 

“Maxwell,” Y/N said and looked up at Jake, “Maxwell Glen Seresin.” 

“I love it,” Jake said, and kissed the top of her head.

“Alright Jake, take a seat in the rocker please, and strip the shirt off,” Vera said and Jake sat down in the rocker and took his shirt off, “This is Baby B. He is five pounds ten ounces, and nineteen point two inches long.” Vera placed the baby against Jake’s chest. Jake immediately tilted his head down to sniff the top of the newborn's head. His heart clenched a bit, realizing that this was the last time he’d ever get that newborn baby smell. 

“Jasper Thomas,” Jake said looking at his wife, “What do you think?” 

“I like it,” Y/N said, rubbing her son’s back, “Jasper and Maxwell,” She sighed and looked at Jake, “Merry Christmas, baby.” 

“Merry Christmas to you too,” Jake smiled, and then looked down at his son asleep on his chest, “This is the best Christmas ever.”

[uniquexusposts]

Her || Charles

Main characters: Charles Leclerc x OC Genre: fanfiction, fluff  Story type: novel  Part: 22/? Word count: 2114 Co writer: @mistrose23

Story summary: Matilde Jørgensen, the new Scuderia Ferrari team principal, faced the nerve-wracking challenge of reviving the team's fortunes and aiming for a championship. Leading a historic team as a 'newbie' and separating her work and personal opinions posed a significant challenge. The big question: is she capable to do so?

Previous chapter

Chapter 20. Routine

Jens opened the door of the Airbnb Matilde had to stay in for three weeks. It was a cottage just outside of Oxford, in a beautiful surrounding for some quietness and peace, perfect for Matilde to recover and rest. It was Saturday, a day after the surgery and Matilde just got released from the hospital.

"This looks adorable," Matilde said when she stood still in front of the door. She was taking a break from walking from the car to the front door, which was about ten metres.

Jens only smiled. "I hope you can recover here quickly."

"It isn't home, but it will do," she gratefully replied.

Her steps into the house were slow and deliberate, her body still adjusting to the recent surgery. Jens guided her towards the living area. As Matilde eased herself onto the couch, Jens went back to the car to grab all the luggage. He picked up Matilde's stuff from the hotel and her car, which was still parked at the track, this morning.

"I parked your car at the end of the street," Jens said once he got back. "I will bring your stuff upstairs. Do you need anything?"

Matilde squinted her eyes; she had never seen him this caring, if she was honest. She and Jens were never that close, the bond between her and Lars was much better. Perhaps it was because Jens was the oldest and moved out quickly. Jens moved out when he was eighteen years old, Matilde was only twelve years old and Lars was fourteen at that time. From that moment on, Jens showed up whenever he felt like it - mainly because he was part of the army. "Uh..." She carefully got up. "I want to take a shower, get rid of the hospital air. Maybe take my suitcase upstairs, but leave my work bag and purse downstairs."

"Yeah, sure. Let's do it."

"But Jens," she said and looked at her older brother. "If you want to go to the Grand Prix, please go. You took time off to be there, you came all the way to the UK, you have VIP tickets, you brought your friends... I don't want you to be here while you can be there, live your dream."

"Tilly," he smiled, it was a soft and caring smile. "My friends can have the dream experience, but I would rather stay here and look after you. I came here to see you work, to be with you, I came here for you. And yes, it is my dream to be a VIP guest at a race, but I'm sure there will be another opportunity anytime soon," he told her. He knew her well enough to give her a little bit more explanation than necessary. "Let's just relax, rest and recover." He took her in his arms, creating a safe space for her.

Matilde closed her eyes and let out a breath, accepting that she wouldn't be able to live her life like she usually would do for three weeks. She carefully wrapped her arms around Jens' torso. For the first time in years, they shared a meaningful hug, but it was a hug she needed. She missed home, she missed her family and this made her realise how far away her family actually was. Jens rested his head on top of hers and he just held her.

After a moment, they let go of each other. They went upstairs, Jens still supporting his little sister. While Matilde was taking a shower, Jens stayed upstairs in case he had to help her. He unpacked his own bag in the guest bedroom, doubting whether he should unpack Matilde's suitcase as well. After the shower, Matilde and Jens went downstairs again. Jens connected his phone to the TV, putting on his favourite Danish radio station - knowing Matilde would like it as well.

"How was the shower?"

"Quite alright," Matilde said. "But I want to wash my hair, but I can't somehow do it," she said frustratedly. "It's such a simple task and I can't do it. Once you can't do it anymore, you realise what you lost."

"I can wash your hair."

"No, it's okay. I can wait two more days until dad arrives."

"I can do it. It's a nice feeling to wash your hair after a hospital visit."

"You don't even know how to do it."

Jens raised his eyebrow. "Why do you think that? I have seen mum and dad wash your hair so many times - and the tantrums you created, drama queen."

She huffed. "Now you are pulling the longbow."

"I said what I said." He leaned against the kitchen counter. The kitchen was next to the living room, well, in the living room. "So?"

"Fine," she gave in. "But how were you planning on doing it?"

"Chair, sit, sink." Jens walked upstairs to get Matilde's hair stuff. When he got back, he set up the setting. He took a chair from the dining room and put it in front of the sink. He placed a towel on the counter, it had to be a cushion. "Sit down, ma'am."

Matilde sat down. "Now you're being scary."

"Why?"

"SInce when are you interested in doing this?"

He grabbed Matilde's brush and detangled her wavy hair, well, expired blow out hair. "I am just taking care of you."

"That's what scares me."

"Shut up." He noticed some small baby curls in her neck. He put a towel over her shoulder and flipped the hair on it. "Okay, lean backwards." Matilde threw her hair over the sink. "Comfortable?"

Matilde looked Jens in the eyes. "Yes, sir. I hope you cleaned the sink."

"Yes." He turned the water on and waited until it was a nice temperature. He wetted her hair and watched how the straight hair slightly bounced back into its natural shape. It was still wet, but her hair turned into a shape again. Jens put some shampoo on his hand palm and emulsified it. During the first wash, he put his attention to the scalp.

"Okay, but for real, since when do you know how to wash hair?" Matilde was perplexed, it didn't make sense. First, he would do everything to avoid talking about hair care, and now he knew what to do. She stared at him.

"Like I said, I watched how mum and dad did it."

"But that's like a million years ago."

"With the tantrums you threw, it isn't easy to forget it."

"Bullshit."

"Don't move."

Jens rinsed the hair and washed her hair again. Then he squeezed all the water out of her hair and put in some conditioner. He instructed Matilde to sit up again, so he could, again, detangle her hair.

"Ouch," Matilde whined after a few minutes.

"Don't fuss," he replied.

"You are hurting me."

"I am not. Just get over it," he responded.

"Be careful."

"Mati."

"It hurts."

"Matilde."

"I can't fucking help that I have curly hair. It is a pain in the arse," she complained. "I am so jealous of all of you. Why do I have curly hair? Why am I the only one in this family? Mum's hair is as straight as a pencil, dad's hair too, Lars' hair too, your hair too. Mine is curly."

Jens had to agree with that; Matilde stood out in the family because of her curly hair. "The mother of grandma Greta had curly hair. Then it passed two generations, for you to have curly hair. Why don't you wear it curly anymore? Why straighten it?"

"I hate genes," she mocked. "I don't like my hair curly, it's ugly."

"It is not."

"It is."

"Why?" He put the comb on the kitchen counter. "Time to let the conditioner sit for a moment." He sat down on the counter of the island, crossed his arms and observed his sister.

Matilde sat up and shrugged. "I just don't like it, I don't think it looks pretty. It makes me feel different from everyone else in the family."

"It is unique."

"And I don't like it."

Jens nodded. "And what about that Leclerc boy?" It was something he needed to talk about.

"What about him?"

"Why did he randomly show up yesterday? After what he did?"

Matilde bit her upper lip and looked outside. She couldn't speak for Charles, she didn't know why he showed up. "I don't know, you should ask him."

"Why did he pretend to be your boyfriend?" Jens continued to ask, it didn't make sense.

She sighed. "It's not like I can look into his head and justify his decisions?" Her face straightened. "I have no idea why he showed up and why he told the nurse he was my boyfriend."

"So..." He squinted his eyes, observing Matilde. "You are on good terms, I see."

Matilde chuckled, her tone holding a hint of irony. "I don't want to say good terms, but we are getting there, I guess. It's still complicated."

He raised an eyebrow, clearly not satisfied with the vague response. "Complicated how?"

"People are complicated, any type of relationship is even more so."

He studied her expression, searching for any signs of discomfort or evasion. She met his gaze with a steady one, her eyes reflecting a mixture of exhaustion and resilience. It was a look he recognised, the same one she wore during challenging moments in her life.

"Til," he began. "You've got enough on your plate as team principal. You don't need more complications, especially not from someone like him."

"Protective big brother mode activated," she mumbled annoyedly.

A chuckle left Jens' mouth, conceding the point. "Maybe I do. But seriously, Tilly, you need people who bring stability, not more chaos."

"I know, Jens. Believe me, I know."

"So, let me get this straight: you start at Ferrari and Leclerc struggles to welcome you. Understandable. Odd, but understandable. Then your team are dickheads by the Miami situation. You cleared the air. Followed by Monaco, where Leclerc is blaming you for his own mistakes, causing more tension between the two of you, portraying you as a bad leader towards the media. And then the moment in Austria, where he fights in front of the media with Max, pulling you down. During the meeting with Max and Christian, he claims that you are only here for Max, fucking him for your position and calling you a bad leader. And when you are hospitalised, he is suddenly emotional, distracted and caring? Showing up without permission, pretending to be your boyfriend, standing next to your bed while pouting? It is almost like he is in love with you but tries to hide his feelings by being a dick." Jens threw his hands up in the air. "Make it make sense, Matilde."

Fact, on fact, on fact. Also a confrontation. Matilde swallowed hard. "He is one of my drivers..." Her lips parted, trying to find some words, which she couldn't find. "I don't want to talk about it now."

"I get it, but do you understand why Lars and I are having doubts? This isn't normal behaviour. And I know you want to protect him because he is your driver, but you need to be careful." He jumped off the counter, turning on the water again, waiting for the right temperature. "Make sure he does not play with you, because his behaviour is affecting you on your mental health."

"Jah," she mumbled annoyedly and laid back to the sink again.

"Just be cautious. It's not just about the racing, it is about your well being."

"Yup."

The short answer said enough to Jens; Matilde didn't want to talk about it. He didn't know if she wanted to avoid the topic or just leave it for now, but she was annoyed by it. Jens rinsed the conditioner out of Matilde's hair and applied the curl cream. "No mousse?"

"Neh, not today."

He nodded. He remembered that his parents had to learn how to control Matilde's hair; they reached out to other people with curly hair because they had no clue how to handle it. Jens also remembered that after applying the mousse, or gel, you had to scrunch it. Even though they skipped that step, he scrunched the cream into the hair, also squeezing out the excess water. He grabbed a T-shirt and dried the hair by scrunching it. "There you go."

Matilde was on the edge to ask to blow dry her hair and straighten it, but she felt uncomfortable and wanted to lay on the couch. She also thought it was adorable how her big brother performed the entire hair care routine by memory on her hair, so she decided to let it go and dry out her hair. "Tak."

"Go lie down on the sofa. I will make you a cup of tea." Jens washed his hands and filled the kettle with water.

"You still scare the crap out of me with how you behave." 

Next chapter

Taglist: @itsjustkhaos@crashingwavesofeuphoria@maryvibess @chocolatefartstrawberry @snzleclerc @ironmaiden1313

[marvelous-llama]

BTS recs

<<original book

most of the mentioned works is 18+ NSFW, MINORS DNI

pls don´t hesitate to hmu, if any of mentioned links doesn´t work or you have suggestions for more fics... thank you so much for all the love and comments

one shots

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[strwbrrygrden]

Summary : The Pervy Airbnb Guest

Pairing : Yunseo x female reader

Warning : Pervy Yunseo, oral (both receiving)

Yunseo is inside your bedroom looking through the laundry basket, he grab one of your panties “she will never know” he said to himself sitting at the edge of your bed pulling down his pants and boxers, enough for his cock to spring free, so he could wrap your panties around it and start to jerk off. He did not want to do this but there is something about you that makes him so addicted to you - maybe it’s because you are hot, super smart, cute/adorable, funny and smell very good. You’re just a girl who needed some extra cash so you post your house on an airbnb app and he’s just a boy who needed a place to stay that’s close to his work. “You are so pretty, y/n. I wish you’re mine..” he says as he closes his eyes and imagine that you are bouncing up and down on his cock as he is sucking on your tits/nipples. “Fuck..” he curse under his breath, he cum three times in under five minutes because of you. “What the heck?!” you exclaims as you enter your bedroom which make him open his eyes and throw the panties on the floor “Y-y/n.. it is not what it looks like” he spoken, you chuckle softly and kneel on the floor in between his legs “y-you’re not mad?” he ask, “Should I be mad at you? Do you want me to be?” you ask him, he bite the inside of his cheeks when you wrap your hands around his cock “Wow. I had no idea you’re big and thick” you say, “W-w-what?!” he respond, you chuckle softly “I said I had no idea you’re big and thick” you repeated yourself, he blush red watching you suck on the tip that’s fill with precum while stroking/massaging the rest of it “o-oh f-fuck baby..” he moan as he grip your hair gently, you look up at him and smirks making his cock twitch “P-please suck me. N-need to cum so bad.” he begs you.

“F-fuck.. p-please k-keep doing that..a-ahh fuck” he moans, you’re deep throating him “s-so good.. mouth so good..” he whines as he grip on your hair more tightly which make you moan against his cock “G-gonna cum” he stutters softly, you continue moaning against his cock and deep throating it “o-oh shit..” he says gripping the bed sheets tight and cum down your throat. “Did you swallow it all?” he ask, you nod your head and pulls away as he smirk “good girl” he praises. You lick the side of your lips and looks at him “I know that you been doing that for a while and didn’t want to said anything” you inform him, he blush due to being embarrassed “don’t be embarrassed.. it’s cute” you tell him, “N-no it’s not.. it’s so embarrassing” he spoken, “Well, I think it’s not. You have to do stuff to pleasure yourself” you acknowledge him before kissing his neck gently “tell me what you been thinking about and I’ll make it come true” you whispers, he bite the inside of his cheeks when you start to caress his thighs “I- you’re so hot.” he said, you chuckle softly as you stood up “wanna look at me as I undress myself?” you ask, he nod his head making you chuckle more “cute..” you whispers. You undress yourself slowly leaving your bra and panties on, “what should I do next?” you ask, “sit on my lap..” he whispers, you sit on his lap and felt his arms holding your waist “grind” he murmur, you grind yourself against him “w-wow” he whispers, “what else do you want me to do?” you ask, “let me suck your tits” he said, “you are a very straightforward person..” you told him, he wrap his arms around your back and unclasp your bra quickly “they’re so nice” he whispers before sucking on your tits and nipples “y-yunseo..” you whines as you grind against him.. this is better than he imagine, you’re grinding against him as he suck on your tits - his mind is all focus on you “what else happen in your dream” you ask, “you get fuck senselessly by me” he answers, “lets make that happen then” you told him.

You’re lying down on your bed as he hovers on top of you and teasingly rub your clit “nice..” he whispers to himself as he insert a finger in you “How can you fit my cock? Can’t even fit my finger” he tease, “i-it c-can fi-fit..” you murmur, he start fingering you gently and slowly “such beautiful noises” he praises you as he add another finger making you arch your back “m-mhm..oh gosh..” you softly mumble, he starts to fingers you in a fast pace “Y-Y-Yunseo..” you moans, eyes shut as his finger hit that spot perfectly “o-oh gosh..fuck..” you curse. By your reaction, he knows what spot he just hit so he tease you “hmm? Right there?” he asks as he let his finger hit that spot a few times “f-f-fuck yes! Right there..oh fuck..” you moans, he chuckle softly “never knew those sounds would come out from your mouth” he spoken, you grip the sheets as he fingers faster “O-oh fuck..gonna cum..” you moan, he pulls away making you whimper softly - you’re so close and he just had to tease you by pulling away. Yunseo jerks himself off a bit before inserting his cock in you, he groans softly as he watch you adjust to his size before thrusting hard and rough “Y-yunseo..a-ahh slow down” you moan, he kisses your neck and collar bone leaving hickeys all over as he fuck you senselessly “s-so tight..so fucking tight” he groans, you arch your back feeling the knot approaching “g-go-gonna cum..let me cum..” you whimpers. The sound of skin slapping skin mix with your and his loud moans/groans echo through the room - he’s so happy that he finally gets to fuck you and that you wasn’t mad at him, you’re just happy since he’s happy. “Cum with me, wanna fill you up” he whispers.

“Cumming” you moans as you arch your back more and grip the sheets tight. He thrust a few more times before his cock twitch due to you clenching so much, the both of you cum at the same time making you moan as he fills you up “you’re mine and only mine..” he says, “o-only yours..” you whispers. He pulls out slow to tease you, some of the cum went on your upper thighs and legs while some went onto the bed sheets. “Y/N” he spoken, “mhm?” you hum, “thank you for not being mad” he said, “no need to thank me, I can’t be mad at you. You’re a boy who need to do things to pleasure or please himself” you replied, “can we do one more thing” he whispers, “what?” you ask, “sit on my face please” he said, you roll your eyes at him before sitting on his face - he grip your thighs gently as he began to suck on your clit “o-oh fuck..” you whispers. His tongue goes deep in you making you arch your back, “f-fuck..” you curse under your breath as you wrap your hands around his cock and stroke him. The both of you start being a moaning mess and eventually cum at the same time - you cum on his tongue while he cum on your hands, it was messy but worth it. “Don’t move.. want you to stay on here” he mumbles, “weirdo..” you tease him, “am not.. I’m just so addicted to your scent..” he reveals, you laugh softly before he suck your clit again “Aye! No more” you tease him, “sorry.. it’s so sweet” he mumbles. You get off his lap quickly and grabs some sleep wear “gonna take a shower now” you told him, “c-can I watch?” he ask, “watch? Why not join?” you ask, he quickly got up and carry you into the bathroom “this is another dream of yours isn’t it?” you question, “it may be..” he answers, you chuckle at how cute he looks and sound before the both of you start “showering” with each other.

[stardustshelb]

"Strawberry" Part Two

TW: Language and sexual content

Word count: 7,468

Chapter Four

“No! No, absolutely not,” Riley said with a concerned look on her face. I FaceTimed her as soon as I got settled in the Airbnb. Since I was the first one to arrive, I felt as though I should get first pick out of the four-bedroom house. This place was twice the size and so much nicer than my own home; no wonder the bill for the weekend was twice my monthly mortgage payment. I saved the master bedroom for Riley, but I decided to claim the room across the hall from the guest bathroom. While it wasn’t the biggest room in the house, it was definitely the most beautiful, in my opinion. I sat on the bed rubbing my hands across the satin sheets as I stared at my best friend’s worried face. 

I pleaded, “Why not?” 

She exclaimed, “Because he’s a stranger! Because you’re engaged! Because you’re alone! Need I say more?” 

“He’s just coming over to cook for me. Nothing more… I haven’t even texted him yet,” I said.

“Look, you know Kenneth is literally my least favorite person on the planet, but you have to be smart about this. You’re normally so level-headed,” she said with a sigh.

“I wish I could explain the way Josh makes me feel. He made me feel better about myself in the hour and a half I sat next to him than anyone has in the past five years,” I said with a lump in my throat. It was true and I realized now more than ever why staying in his company was vital. I needed to be reminded of who I was, who I am, and who I want to be. Josh somehow had the ability to elicit that feeling with his endearing words and beautiful smile.

“Ouch,” Riley said with a disappointed look on her face.

“Riley, you know that wasn’t directed at you,” I said, realizing I should have chosen my words better.

“Listen. I love you. I am not letting your lapse in judgment impact this weekend. Please don’t text him. You have never had to endure the dating world because you’ve been with the same guy your whole life. Men will say anything you want to hear just to get inside you,” she said. 

I knew she was probably right. I had zero experience dating anyone because Kenneth and I have been together since we were kids. I always thought marrying my high school sweetheart was bragworthy, but I feel the opposite now. I have had a secret longing inside me for so long, but change is scary. 

“And what if I do text him? Will you still love me?” I asked honestly.

“Of course, but I can’t say I would support your decision. What’s his last name? Does he live in Nashville? What’s this guy’s deal? What power does he have over you?” she asked like she was interrogating me for a crime I had not yet committed.

“Ok, so I can’t answer the last name part but–” I began.

“Are you serious? You don’t even know his last name?” she interrupted.

“He said he would send me all of his personal information once I texted him. And I will send everything to you. I won’t give him the Airbnb address without receiving what I asked for first,” I explained.

“Text him right now while you’re on FaceTime with me,” she demanded.

“Riley, it’s only been one hour since I left the airport. I don’t want to look desperate,” I replied. I stared at her face while I could see she was thinking of what to say next. Was I really making a mistake by wanting to hangout with him some more?

“Ok, fine.But I want his full name, phone number, picture, social security number, a copy of his birth certificate, and a vehicle description within the next two hours, or I will catch the next flight to Nashville and come kick your ass,” she said with a scowl on her face.

“Within the next two hours…Yes ma’am,” I said with a salute. I ended the FaceTime so I could start to unpack my suitcase. I brought outfits for all of the activities on Riley’s weekend itinerary, something I had no say in creating, but I’ve always been willing to go with the flow. I didn’t bring any extra cute outfits because I expected to stay in tonight. And while that’s still the case, I especially didn’t expect to have company. Would Josh change his clothes before coming? Would it be weird if I didn’t? Why did I care so much?

My phone started to ring which brought me back to planet earth. Kenneth’s name was on my phone screen. He was the last person I wanted to talk to, but I figured if I didn’t answer his call, he would only continue to call me.

“Hey,” I said once I picked up my phone.

“Are you at the Airbnb, yet?” he asked.

“Yes, I’ve been here for an hour talking to Riley on FaceTime,” I said.

“Why didn’t you let me know you made it?” he questioned me.

“I honestly had so much on my mind that I intended to, but–” I started.

“Glad to know I’m not on your mind,” he said in an accusatory tone. 

“Kenneth, I don’t want to argue right now. I’m at the Airbnb. I’m unpacking. I need to start decorating the house here soon before everyone gets here tomorrow,” I sighed into the phone.

“What are you doing about dinner?” he asked. Shit.

“I’ll probably DoorDash something local. I’m staying in, you know that,” I reminded him. “Can you send me a picture of Sassy?” I asked, trying to change the subject.

“Yeah, I will here in a bit,” he responded. “I think the guys and I are gonna go grab a beer after we get off work tonight,” he said.

“Didn’t you guys just go out last night?” I asked.

“Yeah, we’re still celebrating our big win for the company. Are you seriously questioning me when you’re the one in Nashville on my dime?” he asked.

“Just be safe. Don’t forget to send me a picture of Sassy, please,” I said in an attempt to end the phone call. 

“Yeah, I will. Have a good night, I guess,” he said with the least amount of enthusiasm a human could have.

“Thanks, you too,” I said, returning the disinterested tone. I hung up the phone and stared at myself in the reflection of the full-length mirror near the side of the bed. How can someone who says he loves me make me feel so bad about myself? How can someone who I once loved more than anyone in the world make me feel like I am the unworthiest person on earth?

This feeling of despair solidified my decision. I opened my contacts app and scrolled until I found the name Plagiarism; as soon as I saw it, I let out a laugh. It felt good to laugh again..

Me: “Hey, it’s the girl who has no name.” I hit send without overthinking the text. What if he’s never watched Game of Thrones? What if he doesn’t get it? What if I look like a total idiot?

Plagiarism: “The smart, beautiful, arrogant one?”

Me: “I’ve heard that a couple times today.”

Plagiarism: “I was wondering if you were actually going to text me. I’m glad you did. What would you like me to cook tonight?”

Me: “Chef’s choice. Surprise me.”

Plagiarism: “Any food allergies? Likes? Dislikes?” 

Me: “I’m easy to please.”

Plagiarism: “Noted. I’m going to run to the store because I’m low on groceries. I haven’t been home in a while. I’ll text you when I’m about to check out so you can send me your address.”

Me: “Remember I’m not sending you my address until you send me the safety precautions first.”

Plagiarism: “Right. As you wish…”

I stared at my phone screen waiting for the text bubble to pop up to show he’s sending me the information I’ve asked for. As I wish? What the hell does that even mean? I couldn’t stand waiting on his response a second longer, so I left my phone on the nightstand and began hanging up my clothes for the weekend. I opted to change into the comfy clothes that I brought to lounge in tonight after all. I inspected my hair and makeup in the mirror; I could definitely use a refresh. I carried my toiletries bag to the bathroom and began freshening up. Should I wear perfume? I wasn’t wearing any today on the plane. Would he think I was weird for wearing perfume in pajamas? God I hope he’s wearing that cologne again. Suddenly I heard my phone buzz. I ran to check the screen when I saw it was a text from Riley.

Riley: “Did you text him?”

Me: “Maybe…”

Riley: “Send me his number.”

I knew Riley wouldn’t try to contact him. She just wanted to have his information on hand in case anything were to happen to me. I copied the number I had saved for Plagiarism and forwarded it to her. I put my phone back down on the nightstand to continue freshening up in the bathroom when I heard my phone ringing. Who the hell is calling me?

“Yes?” I asked questionably.

“That’s not even his real phone number!” Riley exclaimed.

“What do you mean it’s not real? I have already texted him… Of course it’s real,” I explained.

“No, I just Googled that number and it’s a Google Voice number. That means he gave you a fake number connected to an app. I don’t like this one bit,” she said.

“Riley, you’re overthinking this–” I tried to respond.

“You’re not thinking at all!” she yelled. I sat in silence as I realized she may be right. All I knew about this stranger was that his name is Josh, he’s a concert photographer, he lives in Nashville, and he listens to a band named Greta Van Fleet. Oh, and he loves his mom. That’s it. 

“Please be smart about this,” Riley pleaded, breaking the awkward silence.

“He just responded!” I yelled into the phone while I put her on speaker. I opened his message to find a selfie that I swear was taken by an angel. I stared at his photo for so long I wanted it burned into my memory. I could tell that he changed clothes too. Those sunglasses from earlier now hung around his sweatshirt collar. I zoomed into the background trying to find details but all I could see was that he was in the driver’s seat of a nice vehicle. His hat from earlier was gone unleashing curls styled into… Is that a mullet? 

“Well what does it say?” Riley yelled to knock me out of my trance.

 I read aloud his text to Riley, “My name is Joshua Michael. You already have my phone number. Here is a picture of what I currently look like. I just pulled into Whole Foods, so I’m heading inside to pick up some groceries for dinner.”

“He has two first names?” Riley questioned.

“You would focus on that,” I said with a laugh. I was too busy staring at the selfie he sent me. His soft smile hid the perfect teeth behind his full lips. His eyes were soft and inviting. I wonder if those are natural curls.

“What did you say he did for a living?” Riley asked.

“He’s a concert photographer,” I replied.

“Well, there’s a country music artist named Joshua Michael. He’s old. Let me search for his photography business–” Riley said.

“I don’t know if he has his own business. He could work for a company,” I said with an annoyed tone that she was still in her investigative mood.

“True. Send me his picture,” Riley commanded. I went back to my messages and saved the selfie he sent me. I texted it to Riley and waited for her commentary.

“Ohhhh, ok Joshua,” she said in a high-pitch tone. She got it.

“I’m telling you, his conversation alone is more enticing than his looks,” I said.

“I understand why you are willing to risk your life for a stranger now,” Riley said.

“He texted me again!” I yelped not acknowledging her dig. 

“Read it to me!” Riley exclaimed.

“Ok, I am grabbing two bottles of wine. One red, one white. Unless you think I should get something else?” I read aloud.

“You don’t even drink,” Riley said.

“I drink!” I defended myself.

“Oh yeah, once in a blue moon doesn’t mean you drink. You better limit yourself to one glass. You know you’re kind of a lightweight,” Riley said. 

“Oh, so now you’re ok with him coming over?” I said with a matter-of-fact tone. Riley had been so against the idea of Josh coming over for dinner until this moment. It’s the first time she sounded like she was in on the idea, so I knew I had to take advantage of it.

“He’s coming over regardless of what I say, so I might as well embrace it. Send me a picture of his vehicle when he pulls into the Airbnb,” she commanded.

“Yes, ma’am. Anything else?” I asked sarcastically.

“I want you to text me periodically through the night to check in, ok?” she instructed.

“Yes, ma’am,” I responded.

“Alright, well have fun. Be safe. I love you more than anything. Use your head. Drink no more than one glass of wine. Text me often and–” she tried to say.

“Ok, ok. I got it. I need to get off the phone to freshen up my makeup,” I interrupted. I said goodbye to Riley and hung up the phone. I went back to my text messages to reply to Josh; I wondered if he was annoyed that I hadn’t responded yet.

Me: “One bottle of white wine would be fine.”

Plagiarism: “I’m buying two just in case.”

Me: “It won’t be necessary.”

Plagiarism: “Then I’ll leave the unopened bottle there for you and your friends to drink later this weekend.”

Me: “How thoughtful.”

Plagiarism: “Always. I’m almost finished here. Can I have your address now or is my background check still processing?” I let out a laugh. Against my own better judgment, I sent him the address to the Airbnb. I couldn’t believe I was about to spend the evening with one of the most interesting, attractive men I have ever met. They don’t have guys like him in my small Oklahoma town. 

Plagiarism: “My GPS says I’ll be there in 20 minutes.”

Chapter Five

With 20 minutes to spare, I took what my mother always called a “whore’s bath” in the bathtub. I continued to inspect my hair and makeup in the mirror. Why did I care so much about what I looked like? I brushed my teeth and reapplied my lipstick. I decided on a soft shade of pink to give my lips some color but not too much color. I stood back and examined my lounge set: I got this matching cropped short sleeve sweatshirt and pants on sale at Walmart, and this guy shops at Whole Foods. And he flies in Group A. And he has an assistant. I am so not his type. He is going to be bored of me within the first 10 minutes. 

I put on another layer of deodorant because my nerves were starting to make me sweat. What am I doing? This was a bad idea. This was a stupid idea. I needed to text him right now and tell him I changed my mind. My anxiety was starting to get the best of me, so I started to remember my coping skills. I left the bathroom and sat on the couch in the spacious living room. Breathe. I opened my Spotify app and rather than listening to a familiar song to help calm my nerves, I hit a random song on the Greta Van Fleet playlist that Josh had downloaded to my phone. I closed my eyes and listened to music as I concentrated on my breathing.

“A beauty lives in every soul. The more you love, the more you know. They pass the torch, and it still burns. Once children then, it’s now our turn.”

This song was just what I needed to hear. Did Josh introduce me to my new favorite band? I continued to breathe and take in the beautiful lyrics when I heard a door shut. My eyes shot open and I jumped up from the couch. I glanced over the living room once more to make sure everything looked perfect. I peaked out the window to see him getting the bags of groceries out of the back of his Jeep. I quickly snapped a picture to text to Riley before he saw me. I continued to watch him from the window as he grabbed his final bag. Did he buy the whole damn store? I moved away from the window and waited by the door to let him in. I felt like I was going to pass out.

“Come on in,” I said as I opened the door. Somehow he looked even better than he did earlier. I glanced at his matching tan sweatsuit that complemented mine. His sweatshirt had a tiny triangular symbol with rhinestones, a symbol I did not recognize, sewn into it. He definitely did not get that from Walmart. I closed the door behind him as he carried what looked like seven bags of groceries to the kitchen. I followed him trying to appear calm, cool, and collected. I sat at one of the barstools behind the counter to watch him as he unpacked his purchases.

“Mrs–” he began.

“Miss,” I corrected him. He looked confused as he glanced at my engagement ring still on my hand. Why didn’t I take this off?

“Miss, I hope you like Polish food,” he said as he pulled out the two bottles of wine.

“I’m not sure I’ve ever had Polish food,” I said in a curious tone.

“I’m about to rock your world,” he said with a smile that displayed the gap that I will dream about tonight. I examined his hairstyle while he unpacked bell peppers, onions, carrots, mushrooms, various spices, and a package of beef. His hair was definitely styled in a way that Kenneth would die before wearing. It was a mullet alright, but not like any mullet you would see in Oklahoma. 

“This is my grandmother’s recipe. Normally it simmers on the stove for several hours, but we don’t have that luxury. It will still be good. It’s my favorite comfort soup. It’s called gulasz,” he explained.

“Like goulash?” I asked.

“Similar, but this is the Polish version. Where are the knives?” he asked as he started to wash the vegetables.

“This is my first time using the kitchen too, so your guess is as good as mine,” I said with a nervous laugh. I got up from the barstool to start opening the plethora of drawers until I found the utensils he would need.

“So you’re Polish?” I asked as I handed him a cutting board.

“Yes,” he said with a sense of pride.

 “Have you ever been to Poland?” I asked as I searched for two wine glasses in the cabinets. “One drink” I practically heard Riley’s voice in my ears.

“No, not yet. It’s definitely on my travel list when I go to Europe later this year,” he said as he stirred the beef inside the pot he found. 

“I’ve never been outside of the United States. Hell, I’ve barely been outside of Oklahoma. By the way, why were you and your assistant in Oklahoma City anyways?” I asked.

“My who–Oh, yeah, he and I had a business meeting yesterday afternoon, so we flew back this morning. Our flight last night was canceled. We showed up to the airport this morning and asked for the earliest flight to Nashville, so we were limited to Southwest. But hey, no complaints now,” he said. Although his back was to me, I could hear the smile in his voice.

“A business meeting for your photography?” I asked as I watched him sprinkle paprika into the pot.

“Yes, something like that,” he said with a smirk as he glanced over his shoulder. “Do you live in Oklahoma City?” he asked.

“Oh, God no. I had to drive an hour and a half to get to the airport. My hometown is tiny. We don’t even have a stoplight,” I said.

“You still live in your hometown?” he asked. I watched him chop the vegetables with great focus. His knife work demonstrated that he was skilled. I gazed at the veins in his hands protruding with every motion. He dumped the sliced vegetables into the pot and covered it with a lid. I realized I had been watching him for too long and almost forgot what he had asked me.

“Yes, everyone left except me,” I said with a laugh to hide the pain in my voice.

Josh immediately stopped what he was doing and turned to face me. I could feel him studying my face as if he were trying to read me like a novel. He slowly walked over to me. I felt my cheeks get warm as he stood so close I could smell his cologne over the aromatic dinner on the stove.

“Are you lonely?” he asked with a look in his eyes I couldn’t quite place. Pity? 

“Most of the time, yes. But it’s a feeling I’ve grown accustomed to,” I said with a shrug.

“I could sense that about you. It’s one of the reasons I didn’t want you to spend your first evening in Nashville alone,” he said looking at my mouth. Did I have lipstick on my teeth? 

“Yes, I definitely appreciate the company. How long until the–what was it called again?” I asked.

“Repeat after me…” he said slowly. “Gulasz.” I watched his mouth closely as his tongue flicked between the syllables. 

“Gulasz…” I repeated back to him.

“Good girl,” he said with a wink. I felt myself forming into a puddle on the floor. “It should be finished in about an hour and a half.”

 I needed to distract myself from him. I moved around him to walk toward the counter where I had left the two empty wine glasses. “Sure, alcohol will help” I could hear Riley again. I realized the wine he had bought needed a corkscrew. The only wine I have ever had only had a twist top.

“This is one of my favorites despite it coming from a grocery store. If I had more time to prepare, I would have brought some bottles from my favorite winery,” he said as he began searching the kitchen drawers for a corkscrew. 

“I’m honestly not a wine connoisseur. I rarely drink,” I said timidly.

“We don’t have to open a bottle if you don’t want to. I’m perfectly fine drinking water,” he said, putting the newly found corkscrew back in the drawer.

“No, no, I would like a glass,” I said with a smile. 

“Are you sure? I would never ask you to do anything you didn’t feel comfortable doing,” he said. His face looked so genuine that I wanted to take a picture to remember it. 

“I’m sure,” I said, holding the glasses out to him. He took them from my hands but never broke eye contact. I couldn’t stand the tension any longer, so I walked into the living room and waited for him to bring us the glasses of wine. I glanced at my phone to see two notifications from Riley and 49 from Nashville Babes. I cleared the group text notification and opened Riley’s messages.

Riley: “Ok, so he drives a nice ass Jeep. Slay.”

Riley: “I need a check-in soon or I’m booking a flight.”

Me: “All is good. Dinner is cooking. I haven’t even had a sip of wine yet.”

I put my phone away as Josh sauntered into the room carrying two glasses of white wine. I placed two coasters on the living room table for him. He took a seat on the couch next to me while handing me my glass.

“Cheers, darling,” he said, holding his glass out.

“Cheers,” I said with a nervous laugh. We clinked glasses and took a sip of the wine. I could feel Josh’s eyes on me but I refused to look at him. I scanned the room looking for something to initiate a conversation.

“Have you always lived in Nashville?” I asked him.

“No, I’m actually from Michigan. I moved here about five-ish years ago,” he said, not breaking his gaze off of me.

“I’ve never been to Michigan either. I’m sure that doesn’t surprise you,” I said timidly.

“I bet there is a lot about you that would surprise me,” he said with a wink. I took another drink of my wine to hide my smile. 

“Tell me about that ring on your finger,” he said candidly. Ah, the elephant in the room.

“This is my engagement ring,” I said looking down at my hand. I used to love this ring. I hate that I don’t anymore.

“When is the big day?” he asked.

“There isn’t one,” I said. “Not yet.”

“Marriage isn’t for me,” he said with a sigh.

“Why not?” I asked.

“I just don’t see the purpose. I can love someone, or multiple people in my lifetime, and I don’t need a piece of paper from the government to signify that love. I think society has a twisted expectation with matrimony. If I find someone with whom I want to share a connection with, I will focus my time and energy on that person for as long as I can,” he said finishing his wine. He placed his empty glass on the table next to mine that was still nearly full. 

“To each his own,” I said, eyeing our wine glasses.

“I don’t mean to offend you,” he said.

“You didn’t. I think you have some interesting ways of looking at the world. I’m sure that comes with traveling so much with touring,” I said. Josh looked at me like I had just said the raunchiest curse word he could think of. His shocked expression quickly faded.

“Yes, photography. Touring. Right,” he said as he stood up and made his way into the kitchen. That was weird.

I watched him check the gulasz on the stove before grabbing the opened wine bottle and bringing it back into the living room. “You need to catch up. I’m starting to look like a lush,” he said while pouring himself a second glass. 

“I told you I’m not much of a drinker,” I said, grabbing my glass from his peer pressure. I took another drink as he sat back down on the couch. 

“One more glass and I’ll show you that exotic dance routine,” he said, wiggling his hips. I busted out laughing. 

“Hold on, I’ll need to go get some dollar bills out of my purse!” I said jumping up. Going along with the joke, I polished off my wine and placed the now empty glass back on the table. I scurried into the bedroom in which I claimed earlier to find my purse. I was looking through my wallet when I heard Josh enter the room.

“So this is your bedroom for the weekend?” he asked, looking around. He walked over to the nightstand and placed two full glasses of wine on it.

“I’m not drinking another glass of wine,” I said.

“That’s fine. I’ll drink both,” he said with a smile.

“Joshua Michael, you are a lush,” I said with a giggle. He walked over to where I was standing with the dollar bills in my hand. 

“Are you going to tell me your name?” he asked.

“Do you normally go over to strange women’s houses when you don’t even know their name?” I asked.

“I don’t kiss and tell,” he said with a wink. He moved closer to me. My breathing became short and I found it hard to stay standing. “Honestly, it’s probably best if I don't know your name.”

“Really?” I asked.

“This right here,” he said, reaching out for my hand and toying with my ring. “This right here tells me I don’t need to know your name,” he said. “You will only be here for the weekend and I’m just here for the moment,” he said, still holding my hand in his. “No name… No strings attached,” he said before letting go of my hand. I watched him walk over to the night stand and grab his glass of wine. He was no longer looking at me but I couldn’t stop looking at him. He was waiting for me to make the next move.

Chapter Six

I walked back into the living room, leaving Josh and the wine glasses alone in my bedroom. I could feel the effect of the wine starting to take its toll on me. My lips were tingling with a numbness that was always the first sign of feeling buzzed. I grabbed my phone and texted Riley:

Me: “I’m still good.”

Riley: “What was for dinner?”

“You know you don’t have to go to another room to text him,” Josh said as he walked into the living room with his now empty glass in his hand.

“I’m actually texting Riley to assure her that I am still alive, thank you very much,” I said with a hint of annoyance. 

“Tell her I’ll put the leftovers in the fridge for her tomorrow,” he called out as he walked into the kitchen. I looked up from my phone to watch him stirring the contents inside the pot. 

“It smells amazing,” I said.

“It will taste even better. It probably needs another 45 minutes. Can you wait that long?” he asked.

“Yes, of course,” I lied. I hadn’t eaten since I left the house this morning. The aroma was making my stomach growl in anticipation. I walked back into my bedroom to grab the new glass of wine that Josh had poured me. I took a few sips to try to trick my brain into thinking I was eating something. Alcohol on an empty stomach. That’s a good idea.

“I thought you weren’t drinking anymore?” Josh asked from the doorway.

“I changed my mind,” I said, taking another sip.

“The bottle is almost empty,” he said with a laugh. 

“Well, that’s not because of me,” I said, sticking my tongue out.

“It’s rude to stick your tongue out at people,” he said walking into the room. I tried to think of something witty to say back. The alcohol was definitely in my system now. I wasn’t drunk but the buzz was nice. 

“I’m not sure how much longer I can wait before dinner,” I said honestly.

“How about I take your mind off of dinner for a bit?” he said, closing the space between us. I gasped when he stood so close to me I could smell the wine on his breath. He took the wine glass out of my hand and placed it on the nightstand. 

“Can I kiss you?” he asked me while staring deep into my eyes like he could glimpse into my soul.

“I–I don’t know,” I said nervously.

“I’ll wait until you say yes,” he said, giving me a light kiss on the cheek. At that moment, I felt every nerve in my body combust. I was no longer solid matter; I was a liquid. Without hesitation, I grabbed Josh by the waist and pulled him into a kiss. His full lips kissed mine back and I felt his tongue make its way into my mouth. I pulled him tighter and felt his hands move up my back and into my hair. Every part of me was in this kiss. I lightly bit his bottom lip with my teeth and heard him let out a slight moan. I felt his hand grab the back of my head as he gently guided my body to the bed. 

I began kissing his neck, the same neck I had admired so much on the plane. I tasted his scent and licked the mixture of  cologne and sweat off of his neck. He began to remove his sweatshirt and pulled it over his head. I inhaled suddenly when I saw his perfect chest. I moved my lips down from his neck and began kissing his pecs. I continued to make my way down to his stomach until the peach fuzz below his belly button tickled my chin. I looked up at Josh and saw him smiling as he watched me work my way back up to his lips. He pulled me in for another kiss and I whimpered as he moved his hands all over my body.

“Can I kiss you all over?” he asked me as I tried to hide my grin.

“Where did you have in mind?” I asked playfully. He moved his fingers across my collarbone.

“Here,” he said. Then he moved his fingers lower to my breasts. “Here,” he said again. His fingers began to move slowly downward until they stopped between my legs. “And here,” he said with finality. I removed my sweatshirt over my head and threw it to the floor. I began to unbutton my jeans when Josh’s hands stopped me.

“Let me,” he said in a seductive whisper. I moved my hands to allow him to remove them for me. He pulled my jeans down so slowly I thought I was going to melt into the bed. I could feel my panties sticking to me. He worked his way back up to my upper body and toyed with the clasp of my bra. With only one hand, he swiftly undid it and exposed my bare breasts. He’s definitely a pro at this.

“Wow,” he said while admiring my body. I moved my hands over my face to hide my embarrassment. 

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“I don’t know,” I said, still covering my face. 

“Move your hands. I want to see you smile when I kiss you…all over,” he said gently. He moved his face back to my neck and I could feel his tongue swirl against my skin. His facial hair tickled my neck as his mouth moved to kiss my collarbone. Per his request, I moved my hands away from my face and placed them in his hair. I twirled my fingers through his curls as he brought his lips to my breasts. He took my nipple into his mouth and I let out a moan against my will. This noise that escaped me made him even more eager as he sucked and swirled his tongue against me. His free hand grasped my other breast and he moved his mouth to show it the same attention. I looked down to see him to find him staring at me as he moved his mouth even lower down my stomach.

“Can I remove your panties?” he asked.

“Yes,” I sighed. Just then, I felt his hands gently pull the sides of my lace underwear down my legs. He moved his body to the floor and pulled me to the edge of the bed. He went to place his mouth against my entrance when I squeezed my legs together and pushed him back with my hands.

“Do you want me to stop?” he asked.

“It’s just… I don’t…” I said embarrassed.

“You don’t want me to go down on you?” he asked.

“I…I’ve never had anyone do that to me before,” I admitted.

“I want to show you what you’re missing,” he said, teasing my thighs with his hands. 

It’s not that Kenneth and I aren’t sexually active. Well, scratch that. I wouldn’t say we’re even active anymore, but we’ve had sex. We’ve had the same sex since we were teenagers. In the ten years we’ve been together, he has never gone down on me; I guess I’m too embarrassed to ask him. 

While he was still kneeling on the floor, I looked into Josh’s eyes as his head was positioned between my thighs. I gave him a nod and laid my head back to stare at the ceiling. Before I knew it, his tongue began licking my entrance. Oh my God. I felt his tongue work its way up to my clit where he took his time. With each movement of his tongue, I felt my legs twitch out of my control. He continued to grasp my legs with his hands as my body writhed on the mattress. “Oh my God,” I moaned aloud. My thoughts were escaping me as I felt like I had lost total control of my mind, body, and soul. It felt like he was consuming me with every stroke of his tongue.

“Oh my God,” I practically screamed as I felt myself cum. I tried to squeeze my thighs together but he held them firm with his hands and continued to lick my clit. This feeling was nearly leaving me no longer conscious. “Fuck. Josh,” I moaned as I pulled his hair into my clenched fists. He continued to lick me until I could no longer stand it. I let out another scream and squeezed my thighs together so hard I thought I may kill him. He slowly pulled back and I could see his facial hair was dripping wet. Was that from me?

He kissed the top of my entrance one last time before sitting back on his hands and feet. I laid still on top of the bed, nearly unable to move as I tried to process what just happened. 

“I’m going to clean up in the bathroom,” he said, waiting for me to respond before jumping up. I still couldn’t formulate a single word so I laid there waiting for my senses to come back to me. I heard him laugh as he left the room. I scrambled to find my bra and panties while he was gone. I can’t believe that just happened. I can’t believe what I’ve been missing. 

I went to find my phone on the nightstand to see Riley had sent me a series of texts. I skimmed through them and tried to hide my laughter as I sent another check-in text:

Me: So. Much. To. Tell. You. Still alive and very well.

I hit send and put my phone back as Josh entered the bedroom. He found his sweatshirt and began to pull it over his head. He climbed into bed to lay next to me.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked softly as I could feel his gaze on me. 

“What are you thinking about?” I returned his question with a question. 

“I’m wondering how someone could be engaged to be married, yet they’ve never experienced one of God’s greatest creations,” Josh said with a laugh.

“Ken–He just never has,” I said as I stared into his eyes.

“He’s a moron. You deserve to feel that every day. I love providing that service,” he said with a smirk.

“I can tell you know what you’re doing, but I don’t want to know about your history,” I said, biting my lip.

 “Your taste in particular…” he began to say.

“My taste?” I asked as my cheeks began to redden.

“You taste bitter and sweet… like a strawberry,” he said. “It’s incredible.”

“A strawberry?” I nearly squeaked.

“It’s now my favorite fruit,” he said as he kissed my forehead. He got up from the bed and handed me my clothes from the floor. “Dinner should be ready now,” he said with a laugh.

After freshening up in the bathroom, I made my way into the dining room to find Josh had already made us plates. The room smelled amazing. He opened the second bottle of wine and was pouring us new glasses when I took my seat at the table.

“This looks incredible, thank you,” I said as I waited for him to join me.

“It’s been simmering for a while,” he said with a wink as he placed my wine glass in front of me. He took the seat next to mine and handed me a spoon. I took a bite of the gulasz and fought the urge to moan again this evening. 

“Oh my God,” I said.

“I’ve heard that before,” he said with a smirk. I reached out and pinched him on the arm as he playfully pulled away.

“This may be one of the best things I’ve ever tasted,” I said as I went for a second bite.

“I used to think that too before, well,” he said, raising his eyebrow at me.

“Shut the hell up,” I said laughing.

“So I saved your number in my phone as Strawberry,” he said with a wink. Should I ask him about the Google Voice thing? No, I don’t want to look crazy.

“You think you’ll need my number after tonight?” I said a little too bluntly. 

“You’re still here for a few nights. Maybe we can do this again,” he said with a wink.

“I’m going to be too busy with bars, karaoke, dancing, and strippers,” I said with a smug look on my face. “I won’t be thinking about you.” He can tell I’m lying.

“Thank you again for dinner and for keeping me company,” I said as I collected our dishes to take them to the sink. Josh was searching the cabinets for plastic containers to package the leftover gulasz in. 

“It was an honor,” he said with that brilliant smile of his. It was getting late and I had yet to decorate the Airbnb before the girls’ arrival tomorrow. I was in so much bliss that I had forgotten why I was in Nashville in the first place. I needed to clear his lips, eyes, smile, voice–everything about him from my mind. This was supposed to be Riley’s weekend but thoughts of his tongue consumed me. I walked Josh to the door as he moved in to kiss me goodbye. 

“If I texted you, would you respond?” he asked with one foot literally out the door.

“I might,” I said as I bit my lip.

“I’ll take my chances,” he said as he walked out into the dark driveway. I watched him from the porch as he jumped into his Jeep to leave. I heard my phone ringing from the bedroom. I closed and locked the front door and then took off in a sprint hoping to see the name Plagiarism across my phone screen. Nope.

“Hey,” I said as I answered the phone with a heavy sigh.

“Why do you sound like you are out of breath?” Kenneth asked.

“I just had to run to the bedroom to catch my phone,” I said. “Why are you still up?”

“What did you have for dinner?” he asked instead of answering my question.

“I DoorDashed some pasta from a local Italian place nearby,” I lied into the phone.

“Really?” he asked.

“Mhm,” I said wondering why I felt like I was being interrogated.

“Then why is there no history of any orders from tonight on our DoorDash account?” he asked. Shit.

“I mean I called the restaurant and ordered over the phone. They delivered it,” I quickly added.

“Oh, and thanks for not leaving me anything to eat in the house,” he said. 

“I went grocery shopping before I left. There are plenty of things in the fridge–” I began.

“Yeah, it would have been nice to have some leftovers, but instead I have to cook for myself,” he interrupted. He sounded drunk.

“Look, it’s late. I’m heading to bed. I’m tired from traveling and decorating the house, so if there’s nothing else you have to say to me,” I stated. Kenneth immediately hung up; my brief moment of boldness must have pissed him off even more. I shot Riley a quick text to let her know that I was alone, alive, and going to bed so she wouldn’t be worried before I left my phone on the charger.

I was desperately tired but I needed to decorate the Airbnb for Riley’s bachelorette weekend. I carried the packages of penis and hot pink cowgirl-themed decorations to the living room to begin. To stay awake, I turned on the TV to pull up YouTube to play some background music while I got busy. With the remote, I searched for my possible new favorite band, Greta Van Fleet. I scrolled through the first couple videos until I recognized the face on the thumbnails.

“What the fuck?” I yelled.

[cuchillx]

i was struggling so much with anxiety and heart problems which were making the anxiety worse, I felt so lonely in my transition to move to an apartment, but these last weeks i have been traveling and im so glad i communicated that im not doing well i need a very calm and slow traveling experience because thats exactly how its been, slowly I have been actually feeling better instead of worse, which was something i was so worries about. I have been cooking every day for us, and i decided to continue being on pause on a job hunt and i have been taking my meds and drawing a bit, eating together all our meals, playing stardew on the same hours every day, showering, using an app to plan what i will wear, playing duolingo, our room is really neat and i made friends with other guests, our airbnb is surprisingly accessible and clean and pretty and it wasn’t expensive. its even on the same street my boyfriend is working in. It was the best find. I really thought this trip would be a nightmare of some sort but we had already booked it, but its helping me so much having a routine, not being alone, everything is going smoothly and my heart feels better. if u wished things to go better for me lately it worked :) a little vacation from the horrors

[jellogram]

It does feel bizarre to me when people are like "Noooooo don't stay in airbnbs!!! Don't support that company!!! Stay in [massive corporate hotel chain] instead!!!"

Like I'm sorry but I think paying an old lady $50 a night to use her guest room is more ethical than giving $80-$100 a night to the Marriott Corporation for a shitty hotel room where half the outlets don't work. If you really care about supporting locals when you travel, sometimes giving a portion of your money to the shitty airbnb corporation and the rest to an actual local is the most ethical option. as opposed to giving 100% of your money to an out-of-state corporate hotel chain. It's going to depend on the situation but having such a black and white perspective, where you think all of airbnb is evil and hotels are always better, is doing nobody any favors.

[direwombat]

another week, another wip wednesday

tagged by @inafieldofdaisies and @cassietrn over the weekend and tagged by @socially-awkward-skeleton this morning. Thank you so much lovelies 💕

Tagging: @adelaidedrubman @detectivelokis , @sstewyhosseini, @strafethesesinners , @strangefable , @fourlittleseedlings , @purplehairsecretlair , @schoute , @gaeadene , @g0dspeeed , @sukoshimikan , @poetikat , @josephslittledeputy , @madparadoxum , @euryalex , @clonesupport , @ivymarquis , @vampireninjabunnies-blog , @nightwingshero , @deputyash , @harmonyowl , @aceghosts , @inquisitors-grave, @trench-rot, @river-ward, @confidentandgood, and anyone else who i maybe missed and who has something to share (but no pressure <3)

here's a bit of the abo au i was working on last night (hammered out almost 2k in one sitting which is a lot more than i had anticipated)

“Staci, wait,” she says, and she opens her mouth to begin thanking him, but he shakes his head and cuts her off. 

“Don’t,” he says, his voice cracking pitifully. His eyes glisten and he blinks back tears, swallowing heavily. “This isn’t kindness. I -- I’m sorry.” And without another word, he pulls the heavy iron door closed, locking it behind him and imprisoning her with a damning click.

She sits in the deafening silence of the room for a long, long moment, squirming as the effects of her cold shower wears off. Like a pot of boiling water that was taken off a burner momentarily and then put back on, her simmering Heat rapidly threatens to spill over. 

And then the radio Pratt left behind on the bedside table chirps. “Comfortable, Deputy?” Jacob asks, and in the quiet of her cell, it’s almost like he’s there with her. He doesn’t wait for her to answer, however, and pushes on. “I should hope you are. Your accommodations are far nicer than what most guests receive.” 

She growls and against her better judgment, her hand darts out to grab the radio. “I’m well aware of your typical accommodations. You’ve got the shittiest AirBnB I’ve ever seen.”

“Like it or not, this is where you’re riding out your heat.”

“Says who?” she snarls -- as if she has any idea how she’ll escape. 

“Says me,” Jacob responds. “Face it Jackrabbit, even if you did slip free, you think you’d make it very far in the state you’re in? You’re surrounded by Alphas, honey, and we’ll sniff you out in a heartbeat. I know Heat brain makes Omegas irrational, but you and I both know you’re not that stupid.”

He’s right, of course, but she’ll be damned before she ever admits that. Even if it was almost a compliment. Although the idea of being hunted down, much like how she was before being tossed into the cages does make her cunt clench, forcing her to sink her teeth into her lip to bite back a whimper. “And once my Heat breaks?” she asks, praying to whoever’s listening that Jacob doesn’t pick up on the slight pant and husk to voice. “What happens then?”

“Let’s worry about that bridge when we get to it,” Jacob says lightly. A wonderfully vague non-answer, just what she’s come to expect from the Seeds. “But in the meantime,” he continues, his voice dropping low, and the crackle of the radio gives an even rougher edge to it. “If you ever need any help, sweetheart, just say the word. I already told you that I’d take good care of you.”

The image of him mounting her right there on her tiny little cot, fucking his knot into her, pops into her traitorous brain. The hand not holding the radio slides down her stomach following the path towards her clit. She stops herself just as her fingers slip underneath the hem of her sweater and she snatches her hand back. “I’d rather die,” she snarls into the transceiver. 

There’s a long pause, and when Jacob finally responds, all he gives her are three words to end the conversation. 

“So be it.” 

[reincarnatedonthefirst]

An update on my day so far…

I’m still on cloud nine after yesterday’s appointment with the new client. I can’t wait to host him at my house and I hope he becomes a part of my life.

I wasn’t feeling well earlier and it felt like blood wasn’t getting to my brain so I decided to jog back and forth in my house for 10 minutes. 10 minutes turned into roughly 27 minutes. I jogged while listening to the pre White House Correspondence dinner commentary. This sht is like listening to lifestyles of the rich and famous. CNN is actually pretty tolerable when they aren’t supporting white supremacy.

I really want to get a treadmill or walking pad now. Jogging at home is way better than the 30 minute round-trip to the nearby park.

The guests at the AirBnB in back of me is having a party. I enjoy hearing the sound of party and enjoyment and gatherings. I’m such a solitary person so I like hearing the noise of people socializing.

Some time between now and Monday, I need to read a few articles and catch up on world events. My dinner date with the lawyer is Monday night and I can tell that he’s very sharp but, also, judgmental.

Alright. Genocide Joe is about to speak at the dinner. Lemme watch this.