#they’re after ya’ll terfs

[arterartthings]

Two power girlies withe their anime weapons

Amy- Gary’s trident with essence of the UNSPEAKABLE + demon hand in her hair (dunno how that makes sense, just accept it)

Barbara- Rusty-ass sword made of rust (I know, poetic)

[halfricanloveyou]

i think it’s so wild that white people online will be all “racism is bad” online to shout to everyone about how they “care” about human rights and then still openly consume and promote content by creators who are openly racist and will type 3-4 page essays about how they aren’t being racist by doing this, actually.

OR when their s/o or parent or sibling or friend openly says something racist on a public format and spreads it around they’re suddenly radio silent. not a peep. or when a black person online comments on a race issue and if their white friend starts attacking the black person by accusing the black person of racism and then using AAVE to “give a sassy and succinct clapback” they instantly jump to their white friend’s “rescue” and defend them. then they and their friends all sit and profile dive and find personal info about the “racist” black person and actively harass or straight up doxx the black person.

and then they have like “BLM” shit on their profile. or after that go on a long long rant of “everything good” they’ve ever done for “you people” because they genuinely think reblogging pro-BLM shit is all it takes to make a difference.

fucking seriously, i am so so fucking tired of it. ya’ll won’t even do the bare minimum for us. ya’ll won’t even attempt to advocate for us ONLINE unless it’s trendy to do so or serves a way to boost your own egos.

and on this website SPECIFICALLY i am so so fucking tired of no one actually listening to the black users here but instead actively going out of your way to force us all into an argument on race as if ya’ll have ANY RIGHT to do that. especially when we, as actual VICTIMS of racism, call it out when we see it.

you don’t put any effort into stopping the spread of racist ideals or deplatforming racists. we can’t count on you to even shut the fuck up when we talk, let alone amplify our voices. advocating online is the EASIEST, LOWEST EFFORT way of promoting the spread of racism, ESPECIALLY to minors, the most impressionable group of online users.

if a terf shows up you guys go the extra mile to shut them down immediately and get them the fuck off this site. you will even steal their fucking URLS and get them deactivated. if a white trans woman is being harassed by terfs MULTIPLE users will come to her inbox and offer their support. if someone struggles with mental illnesses or the stigma surrounding them people will reblog the shit out of their posts to make people see things from a different perspective. and those are ALL GOOD THINGS!!!

the notes on those posts will be absolutely FLOODED with people agreeing. if someone tries to be an asshole everyone dogpiles on them and shits on them for their shitty comment. and you know what? the shitty ableist or transphobic comment gets deleted or the blog gets shut down.

but where is even a FRACTION of that energy for racism? for racist blogs? why is it that even if a post regarding racism gets overall approval and is reblogged/popular the notes on it are OVERWHELMINGLY negative and racist and no one reblogging the post actually fucking cares enough to shut that shit down like they do everything else?

i am so so fucking tired of every single fucking online space or platform being like this. including this one. i can’t even get on here and enjoy any form of black oriented content or posts or opinions without 8,000 white people attacking and tearing it down and another 8,000 making it about themselves and how good of an ally they are without addressing any of the racism or racists all over it and the rest of the fucking site userbase not giving a shit until another white person is affected somehow or it directly benefits them.

i can’t even escape this shit in real life. i’m just so so fucking tired and disappointed and angry. there’s never a fucking break from this fucking bullshit. sure. ya’ll don’t burn crosses in yards anymore and get away with it. but openly calling us monkeys, harassing us, and never letting us rest at any time, then accusing us of racism when we get angry in any way? it’s just so fucking….insane to me.

[antiterf]

terfs really don't do much to dismantle gender or the patriarchy and it can be clearly seen by how they treat gnc people and especially gnc trans people.

being trans is already breaking the cisheteronormative view of "women are like this and men are like this" but gnc trans people take it a step further. yet not ONCE have i seen terfs reacting positively to a gnc trans man who wears a dress with a full beard, or a trans woman who doesn't shave or is butch. this goes especially for how they treat amab gnc people, even cis gay men because no matter what they'll hate their guts for being gnc, for wearing makeup or being feminine. they'll either scream it's "appropriation" (not a thing, genders can't be appropriated) or they'll scream it's a fetish and they're trying to get into women's spaces. it's gotten to the point where they start to shame gnc gay cis men and even drag, which was always an important part of queer history.

you can't win with them no matter what. all of their "activism" or whatever is performative bullshit, they'll only cheer on of smashing gender roles if it's done by cis white terfs.

Fun fact! Second wave feminism, which terfs have the ideals of, some groups had an issue with drag. An example is the Lesbian Feminist Liberation, where it's founder, Jean O'Leary, gave a speech about how drag was basically an insult to women. It was actually right after Sylvia's "Ya'll better quiet down" speech. It was when breaking gender norms with clothing was still illegal. It was when drag queen was basically another term for trans woman.

I know a lot of people won't click the link but O'Leary completely regretted that by the time she spoke about it here. She was an incredibly important in the gay rights movement, helping to found National Coming Out Day for example, and if I don't say that here then most people are going to paint her as an incredibly bad person today.

Seriously though you're right and it's exhausting. Even when it comes to gnc cis women, if you're not straight but not a lesbian, they care more about you not using butch than they do about you actually breaking gender norms. Even when you're a cis women, if you're intersex they don't see how much that can effect gender conformity and are often intersexist.

Native, Latino, Latina, Indian and Black women, honestly a lot of women with generally darker skin are looked at as "masculine" by default in a racist and colorist society but they don't fucking mention how they're required to reach a higher standard of white femininity to get by in a racist society. Asain women then face a stereotype of perfect femininity and often fetishized for that (I'm not sure how darker Asain women are effected by colorism mixing in here but I'm guessing it's a coin flip every fucking time).

No mention about how gender roles are across cultures besides "all of them are bad get rid of them" and especially no mention about how different cultures treat someone who breaks gender conformity.

There's no big action until trans people are involved yet they claim its for a movement that's against gender as a whole.

[weaselbeaselpants]

I have a lot to say and not enough time to say it. It hurts, but ya’ll know what this is about so if you want my full fandom retrospective opinion thing guys, here.

I’ve been following Vivienne’s art and career since I found her on dA in 2009. I’ve basically grown up with her and have a wide range of opinions up and down her collective work. I must stress that I do not know her as a person and no matter how critical I get in my personal time if I somehow met her in real life or converse with her online again (like, back in the day we went back and forth. She was pretty nice to me), I’d be humble and congratulate her for her success.

Critique does not, EVER equate to attacking people.

But

the reason I don’t call myself a VivziePopVivzmind-fan is the exact same as to why I don’t like the proud use of ‘anti’. Let me try and explain -

The vast majority of Viv fans are just that: fans. Viv’s one of their favorite artists and they’re happy for her and obviously defensive when some mouth breather pops into their fan discussion calling her and all of them trash. Quite a lot of the Hazbin fans I know in my circle of friends are all pretty accepting and agree on the problematic notions and implications of her work.

HOWEVER, there’s a vocal minority in the VivziePop fandom that were and still are toxic. Their specific interest in Viv back in the day was toxic...and now that she’s moved on into a successful career I doubt they’ve gone away, considering the things I’ve heard. These people - they’d flood Viv’s comments sections and stuff with messages like they were talking to her when they weren’t and they’d unironically call her a god in a way that feels like gaslighting, ex: “I’ll NEVER be as good as you Viv! My art is just sooooo unpopular oh god you are incredible no one will ever like you as much as meeeee”. It made me uncomfortable. It made me not want to be around her because these people took Viv’s role in their lives so seriously and their demand for her attention...it struck a nerve.

These same fans have been around long enough to see actual shitlords - the likes of Kiwifarms and tapatalk wikis - come in and actually harass Viv. Viv’s been sent revenge porn by sick freaks who think they’re funny and believe she deserves it. No. In my non-name fan bystander opinion, Viv’s got some shit to work on, but no one deserves raperevenge porn. EVER. It was genuinely bad and yes Viv and her base have every reason to NOT TRUST these communities. Unfortunately, when these incidents happened, these particular fans took it upon themselves to gatekeep the fandom and act like Viv’s unofficial guard against any kind of decenting opinion of her, all without her say so.

((to the critics who will be all “but Viv or Faust said THIS to their fans-”, like I said, Viv’s far from perfect but regardless of how much she prolly wanted people to side with her I’m gonna guess that she didn’t want people sending transphobic death threats to DollCreep. Again, and this is coming from a bystander here, I have a feeling Viv knows about some of the toxicity but doesn’t know how/want to address it - which is a conversation all it’s own.))

This particular breed of VivziePop “fan” holds so much toxicity in her fandom(s). They aren’t the only cause, but they’re there. They feel entitled to her attention and her approval. They creep me out. Having spoken to other much-less critical admitted fans of Viv around me, these fans appear to creep everyone else out and put the rest of the fandom on edge. They’re gatekeepers. They’re creeps. Like the bronies and SU fans of yestertodayyears, they know harassment exists and that people have crossed the line - so they think any means is necessary to prevent that is automatically good. I could pile together all the incidents and folks who’ve had bad runs ins with this aftershock of Viv-obsession, but I do have a life of my own and this post is already stupid long so I’ll just list out the biggest examples and provide receipts when asked.

Critical blogs have gotten RAPE and death threats because they don’t like Viv’s art. HonestZoophobiaCriticisms, a blog I interracted with back in the day, def got one. Now Viv’s opinion of crit-blogs is that they’re “bad takes” but I can assure you she doesn’t want that shit being said on her behalf.

I’ve seen young artists get blacklisted from sites and forums cause they so much as post a redesign. Viv and co get told through the grapevine that someone’s making hatespeech and so preemptively block said person (prolly cause they’re in the middle of WORKING and can’t deal right now) only to find out after the fact that no, it was just a kid drawing their version of her characters. There’s serious miscommunication issues within the fandom about who’s ‘good’ or ‘bad’ and once you get the actual staff involved in this game of telephone you’re begging for trouble. The problem acknowledged, however, it’s souly from the “Viv never did anything wrong camp”. No word is said about how ugly the fandom is under the surface it’s all one type of person’s fault and not complicated’. Blah

I’ve only ever had ONE obsessive ‘fan’ who’d stalk me, mock me, and then redraw my art just to get attention from me. That shit fucked with my head. As a follower hundreds of miles away from Viv who’s agreed/disagreed with her through the years - I absolutely believe her when she says she hates ‘creeps’ and that she doesn’t want anyone in her fandom spreading hate on her behalf. It’s the one thing about her I’m POSITIVELY sure of. Whether she believes that said underlying harassment exists and/or is even a problem within her fandoms is anyone’s guess. That’s not what I’m here for. I’m here to write stupid blog entries like this, talk about fandoms and media and how they and the real world affect one another, and rb fan art I like. I’m cautiously optimistic fan with a side of salt.

Mixed opinions and critique within a fandom CAN and SHOULD exist. Hazbin Hotel has been greenlit by a studio! It has a product line of merchandise you buy. Helluva Boss is getting eight more episodes this coming year (yeeee:3yeeee). Two of Viv’s properties are now products. Nothing is immune from critique. And in critique you will find a lot of people who are not ‘nice’. Critique or analysis doesn’t have to be nice. There will be, in Viv’s words’ ‘bad takes’ on her writing. Maybe they will be actual CinemaSins-styled bad takes or maybe Viv is just mad that people don’t love and feel inspired by her characters the way she wants them to - it’s a fact she’s going to have to get used to.

((TBH, I’m pretty sure she’s already realized that criticism of all types need to exist. It’s just that, again, her and the SpindleHorse staff are kind of overwhelmed by all matter of takes and opinions coming their way they kinda can’t deal weeding out the fair ones from the assholes, so she lumps them all together.))

Shitposters, ironic fans, unironic fans, critical fans, just critics of Hazbin and Helluva CAN and WILL exist. They should exist and not feel threatened by the megafandom. There are people out there who are one step further and rightfully bothered by Hazbin/Helluva’s use of incorrect symbols, portrayal of certain topics, and the response by creators. These people have strong opinions and are actually disgusted by Viv. They deserve to exist too and should not be vilified because, like me, they’re commentary doesn’t consist of anything personal towards the people at Spindlehorse or the fans of her works. They can rant, they can be professional, they can be petty and they can be fair. But they will exist. You have to deal with it.

I am an ADD/OCD ridden autistic woman with serious anxiety issues who has no one to talk to half the time and so only HAS my fandom to communicate with. But that’s just it - it’s a fandom. A community. You have to learn to not think souly of yourself and of others in a community. A fandom doesn’t exist just for you or any one person. You have the right to be angry and defend or be offended. And it’s in the spirit of that that I ask, prrraaaaaay even, that I please

NOT BE CALLED AN “ANTI-ANTI” for not liking the moniker?!

I DON’T TO BE AN “ANTI”. Not ironically, not unironically. ‘Anti’ should be for politics and shit like pedophiles, necrophiles, nazis, serial killer stans, Trump, racists, antisemites, terfs, animal abusers, rapists, and antivaxxers. Anti should only come into critical media analysis when these ethical issues follow suit IN TO fandom discussion. ((EX: Anime and MLP proudly waving their cp and non-con into the public eye; Hazbin appropriating cultural symbols which are not satanic; Basically anything that concerns John K or Butch Hartman.))

If your DNI list unironically consists of the entirety of one fandom:  CONGLATURATIONS! You have done the exact same thing these particular creepy Viv fans have done: monopolize the conversation. And yes, people I’m referring to, IT’S STILL A PROBLEM EVEN IF YOU’RE FIGHTING RACISM/SEXISM/HOMOTRANSPHOBIA.

There are hundreds of Vivziefans who ARE more critical, accepting of faults, interested in discussion and especially rewrite and redesign stuff who would LOVE to engage with you and give you a follow. There’s hundreds of people who no doubt agree with you!

But the thing I’ve seen these very proud AntiHazbinVivzieHelluvaWhatever blogs do is lash out at fans for continuing to like Viv and consume Viv’s art in a healthy way. What the actual fuck is your problem?

I get it. Say a crazy Hazbin fan gets on your case for even SUGGESTING Viv could be homophobic ((”SHE’SBIANDWORKSWITHGAYPPLblahablahblah”)). They get in your face, make some callouts, try to rile up support against you, leave disgusting harassment throughout your social media? Absolutely ban worthy. After that it’s perfectly understandable why you don’t want to engage with anything HHHBZPVivzierelated because you’re so fucking tired of being labeled an abuser or “just jealous” for having an opinion on a show you don’t like. I’m with you!

But,

A fan agrees that something in the canon is bad or that Viv did something they don’t like?

A fan likes your silly shitpost meme?

A fan asks if they can like Hazbin and follow you at the same time? 

A fan does fan art of something you don’t like?

If your response to any of these ^^^ things is to get LOUD and accusatory, Vivsplain them about how they’re an absolutely awful person to ever question YOUR opinion, or just block them without a second thought? You’re a petty, vendictive shit and you also need to learn to let things go. I’m sorry but you do. As I already said, Viv’s work is a brand at this point, not just the work of a singular person. As such, there are gonna be mixed opinions and you can’t judge every single one of these people by what they like. You’re a shitty critic with a shitty attitude and yes that will demean the value of what you’re saying. This is bad because, if you’re trying to point out how Angel Dust’s abuse IS handled terribly; gay rep in Viv’s work is weak and terrible; the show appropriates closed practices; the fandom makes excuses for predatory artists and creepy behavior and individuals who have sketchy pasts - I’M WITH YOU. WE NEED TO BE TALKING ABOUT THIS SHIT. JUST BECAUSE THESE ARE ADULT CARTOONS SET IN HELL MEANS THERE SHOULD BE ANYTHING CLOSE TO 2013 PONY-TUMBLR. <<<---- this shit is as important to me as it is to you and I really don’t like being called an abuser or apologist for saying “hey maybe blowing up at ppl for the shows they like ISN’T the way to go about this”. 

But I have, just like the good old days of 2015 Zoophobia of yore, been blocked because I admit to being tired of ‘Anti’ being equated to ‘critical’. Same with hater.

Critical DOES NOT = Anti+Hater. I’m fucking tired of people saying it does and I’m tired of people taking up the term as some weird form of fandom reappropriation. It’s stupid.

Tl;dr: Once upon a time, I was in a budding fandom for something I liked made by an indie artist I watched on dA. I wanted to be a bigger fan than I was already, but was told by toxic people within said fandom that I couldn’t be part of it for reasons they’d made up in their head about my ‘motives’ against Viv. My admiration for Viv or what I liked about Zoophobia didn’t matter because I thought the story was really rushed and people weren’t being truthful with how they really felt about it - ergo, I HAD TO GO. 

Flash forward 8 years later- My opinion of Viv’s body of work has changed but I still find myself in love with her style and some of her characters. I want to be on a forum or service that gives a healthy look at the problems there are with this series and fandom...and I’m met repeatedly by petty bs where people are again at each other’s throats. And yes, I do think it’s causing more harm than good especially when you insist there’s a “x person shouldn’t be trusted” mentality when fighting actual fucking racist, xenophobic, predatory bullshit.

[medleymisty]

So there’s Drama going around again, and it makes me really uncomfortable, although at least it’s not full on triggering like it used to be. And I mean triggering in the actual PTSD way, not whatever the word has morphed into among internet trolls.

I’ve picked up that some of it has something to do with age differences, because the internet has gone full Puritan and “save the children” like it’s the 80s and ya’ll are seeing Satanic cults abusing children at every daycare again. Yay radfem ideology seeping into fandom spaces and being propagated by people who say that they hate TERFs! /sarcasm

Anyway - I am an adult, adult enough to have been with the spousal person for 21 years, my stories are often about traumatized characters since I’m traumatized, I don’t think they’re gory but other people with different gore sensitivities do, and it’s fine if you’re not in a good place to read about trauma and anxiety and things like that and you don’t want to read my stuff.

Also I think it’s good for young people to have adults they can talk to who aren’t their parents, because lots of parents aren’t safe, and although I definitely know that real abuse can happen online after my experience with the emotionally abusive ex-best friend, it’s still probably more likely that kids will be abused by their parents and family friends and adult authorities in their community than strangers online.

Still, I try to not follow people who state on their blogs that they are very young these days because of this sort of drama, but if you want to follow me that’s fine. If you don’t want to follow me because I am a Scary Adult Who Does Adult Things, that’s fine too.

Personally I like being in a position to let kids who are currently living childhoods like the one I had know that there is a future, that they can heal, that they can survive and that things can get better. It makes me sad that the current moral panic about minors on the internet means that I don’t feel comfortable doing that anymore, because the last thing I want is an internet mob coming after me.

On that note: stalking people’s blogs, sending them hateful anons, and spreading hate about them to others counts as online abuse too.

More below the cut if you wanna read. It got long, lol.

Also you gotta take responsibility for your own online experience. I know that’s hard, like there’s someone out there who absolutely hates me but they haven’t been able to tear themselves away from reading my stuff for a decade now, but really, if you’re reading something and you don’t like it and it makes you uncomfortable, you can use the unfollow and block buttons. You can use the x button to close the tab. You can use Tumblr’s filter function. I have Simsecret and animal death filtered, and both have saved me from having to look at things I don’t want to see.

There are things that seriously trigger me. Again, the real meaning of the word trigger, as in my amygdala gets hijacked and I get thrown into an emotional flashback and my body and brain react like I’m still a kid who can’t escape situations that were a real threat to my life, and if it’s bad enough it can take days for me to calm down and get back to normal. It’s my responsibility to take measures online to help me feel safer. It’s not the responsibility of strangers who don’t know me or my triggers to not post anything that I could possibly find triggering.

With that said, if you need me to tag something and you’re nice and polite about it, I will try to remember to tag. I might not remember always, and then it’s fine if you feel like you need to unfollow me to keep yourself safe.

Also, really, ya’ll need to learn to spot TERF-adjacent ideology and also learn about moral panics and how often “save the children” is used as propaganda to get regular people to support some really awful things.

*hugs to anyone who read this far*

[transmechanicus]

Trans On Main 2 (long af)

Alright um, this post was requested rather than like...planned so im gonna Stream of Consciousness it and hope it edits into something coherent. Also, to get this out of the way, I’ve unfortunately been having to put up with blogs of A Type trying to follow me for the past few days, so I’d like to be clear that i despise any kind of content that has to do with s*ssies. Cannot even type the word, the concept is abhorrent to me, i cannot tolerate it to any extent. The degredation, humiliation, and misogyny that is intrinsic to the trope is just reprehensible to me, dials my dysphoria up to 11 and magnifies internalized transmisogyny to unbelievable levels. I 0% fuck with it, and if that’s your thing i don’t wanna hear about it ever. This is a Praise and Affirmation For Trans Girls Only Space....Anyways, ya’ll know the drill, comment something cute or nothing at all, mega internalized anxiety talking about this topic, TERFS die of rad poisoning, yaddah yaddah yaddah lets get this bread ladies.

I think what’s most useful about these posts is it allows me to reflect, to look back on a trope or idea i enjoy and break down why i like it, why it appeals to me specifically as a trans girl.

I guess topic #1 for this post is the use of hair salons as a common locale for the story, or at least the portion of the story in which the main character’s transition occurs. Its incredibly popular, the environment is very romanticized and I can understand why. From the perspective of a trans woman, a hair salon is one of a handful of locations where cis women can go in, stay for X length of time, and come out looking and feeling more beautiful than they did going in. That has absolutely massive appeal to trans women as a concept, however unrealistic or simplified it may be. The idea that you can go to a place and request a service that is meant to actively make you look more attractive, or more like the woman you aspire to be has nothing that even remotely compares among services intended for men. Nothing even close. In fiction this idealized environment is also typically staffed by very attractive women who either read the protagonist as a woman, or are overtly supportive of them during any transition that takes place. While i do think there’s a reason for this secondary theme, it basically ties into my second topic so I’m gonna hit pause on this one and sort of circle back to it.

Topic #2 is femdom. Yeah. That word might carry some connotations for some of you but just, push those to the side for a minute ‘kay? They’re probably not what i’m going for, I’m being purely literal with this term. Femdom in this context describes a transtion that occurs, in part or in whole, at the behest of a female figure in the story. Her relationship to the protagonist varies a ton across different works, as does the protagonist’s degree of consent to her decisions. Girlfriend, boss, older sister, mother, and others utilize leverage such as romantic attachment, money, political power, shame, or physical force to bring about the transition of the protagonist. Personally I think the appeal of this trope is due to two things. The first, as discussed previously in a more personal sense, is that the protagonist has reduced autonomy. They can only partially resist their transition, if at all, and its completion carries a sense of inevitability. Such a state of affairs, i think, has very high appeal for trans girls who struggle with internalized transphobia, as the fears and worries that hold them back are not a concern with someone else in command of their transition. The second source of femdom’s appeal comes down to experience. Who knows more about being a girl than someone who already is one after all? This is also where i cycle back to the attractive salon staff. You have a group of women who are assumed by virtue of being girls to know what it takes to be read as one, by virtue of being attractive they’re assumed to know how to maintain their appearance as girls, and as salon employees they are assumed to have the skills and tools to make sure the protagonist will be read as a girl. So, experience and reduced autonomy are the underlying reasons for femdom’s appeal, but i think a more...punchy way of putting it is trans girls want someone to trust. We occupy a uniquely disliked category of society and are subject to extreme mistreatment and harassment, making it nerve wracking to know who its safe to come out to, and who’s looking to exploit us. The idea that our transition, our most private and personal burden, can be taken off our hands by someone with the motivation and skills to do it well...i don’t have the words for how amazing and relieving that sounds. To be able to trust someone like that and have it pay off. I would die of joy. I would cry my eyes out.

This is already very long but i guess the last thing i wanted to get out, like i did last time, is how would i use the concepts i discussed in a story from the perspective of an actual trans girl.

I imagine it would be a surprise, a gift for her birthday or anniversary with her girlfriend. The appointment was scheduled at the salon months ago, and her girlfriend gently tugs her inside by the hand before speaking with the receptionist. Maybe her girlfriend works there, or is friends with the staff, but either way all the stops are pulled out at her say-so. No other appointments or walk-ins will be allowed today, and the staff is very excited to dote on this special guest. She’s escorted back to her seat, a cape is thrown around her shoulders, and the work begins. Her girlfriend has already provided all the information the stylists need, and any nervous objections or questions the girl has are ignored, overridden, or silenced with a firm kiss from her partner. Her hair is dyed, buzzed, styled and blow dried into an undercut pixie that the stylists compliment over and over. Her makeup is done flawlessly, faced away from the mirror with only her girlfriend’s growing smile to indicate its quality. Her nails are shaped and painted, her ears are pierced, the studs shining against her hair. The full reveal happens with her girlfriend’s arms around her shoulders, their beautiful faces paired perfectly. Then she’s swept into a backroom to try on a panoply of outfits, her girlfriend snapping adoring pictures of each, from skimpy lingerie to tasteful casual wear. The assembled stylists compliment each one, praising her pose, her persona, her smile, as the camera flashes over and over again. With everything boxed up, her girlfriend drives her home in her favorite ensemble, kissing her at every red light. They drift off to sleep in each other’s arms, but not before it slips out that tomorrow she’s in for a similar surprise at a local hospital. Something to do with filling out that lingerie a little more~ <3

[mrd-gvf]

Fiction only affects reality if you let it. Jaws wasn't the reason the population of sharks went down, It was already declining. BOAN didn't "Revive" the KKK, it as still already going, just scattered. If you get your sex ed from porn/fanfic you're an idiot. It's called being uneducated. Silence of the lambs won awards but people only now cry that Hannibal is bad because "cannibal bad". Dark/horror fiction exists. Victims/survivors also use fiction to talk their abuse to only receive death >

< threats, rape threats, etc. I've seen people call a 16 y/o a pedo for liking a character who was 16. I've seen the term "Freaks of colour", racism, homophobia/transphobia from these "Dark fic bad" people. In fact, adults telling kids to find out people who post dark/R rated content is uh, grooming, cause your telling kids it's okay to look at triggering/pornographic things. Block accounts, tags, names, it's not hard to avoid content that is lewd or dark. Also, this mostly applies to gay >

< ships. People will say Stucky or Shieth is incest since they were "raised like brothers" but will ship Catdora(?). X character can't be bottom or wear feminine things cause it's fetishing gay people, fujoshi fetish gay people, that a gay man consuming gay content is fetishing. Do you know what is fetishing? Having gay ships and not supporting gay rights. There, I said it. I've seen Trans people be sexist and or spout terf rhetoric. Ya'll go after fan creators and not GOT author? And as you >

< can see, GOT only made people buy pets and you know, not fuck their siblings. If you read something as romanticised even though that's not the authors intention, you need to learn to read between the lines. Some CSA survivor groups do reviews of Lolita. SA survivors may partake in BDSM fantasies because it's a controlled environment where they have their say. Yes bad fiction exists (cuties, 50 shades, 365) but if you used the last two as info for bdsm, you're an idiot. Is it hasbro's fault >

< adults used My little pony to groom kids? Is it the author of a fanfic's fault you decided to take an explicit book as proper info? No. Alien is about Sexual assault but that hasn't stopped people assaulting others. If you get your morals from a book/movie, you're dumb, simple. Everyone knows r*pe/inc*st is bad but people still write it. R*pe isn't show off as sexy. and Inc*st is common in many parts of the world (though it shouldn't be.) There are people giving fictional kids more rights >

< more rights than real kids. Peter parker doesn't need you to send art of him to cyber tip hotline and waste the funds that are supposed to go to real kids. TLDR: yes people may write gross stuff, but doxxing and threatening LGBT/CSA/SA survivors artist for using art to express themselves or their feelings, you aren't a good person. If you want fiction to not affect your reality, watch what your kids are doing and educate yourselves. It's easy to blame fiction than say you're fucked in the head

This was a lot. But I still stand by the notion that fiction does affect reality. Everyone should be aware of what they're consuming and everyone should question things if something doesn't seem right.

[terfslying]

How TERFs treat people who have complaints / problems with the community

LesbiFairHere has recently made a public post about leaving radical feminism, discussing the reasons that she feels that her being young and vulnerable was part of why she joined radical feminism. You can read her post here if you’re interested. She contacted me when she was getting hateful responses, which seem to be continuing for the minute, and I wanted to do a post on the general situation.

As background, I just want to establish that LFH actually (as far as I can tell) was genuinely a TERF, despite some comments / reblogs trying to say that her blog is new and she was never a TERF. In fact, I found she posted in Dec last year that she was having problems with the radfem community, so she’d been having doubts for some time.

tl;dr - LFH’s blog shows months of TERF activity on the archives page. Other radfems also acknowledged she’s been around for a while.

Posts from LFH herself, just to give some examples of her previous interactions with the radfem community on tumblr:

Dec 2018: Was the OP for anti-Yaniv posts

Dec 2018: Reblogged user boxes like “This user is homosexual, not kweer” and “This user is a real girl”

Jan 2019: Reblogged ‘Drop the T’ post

Jan 2019: Reblogged ‘Master Post on what TIMs and TRAs say’

Feb 2019: Reblogs stuff likening SRS to genital mutilation and misgendering

A radfem discourser in response to a callout commented on the original post:

“I will say I find it odd that this info is out there about their behaviour but also that I remember her being a radfem for quite some time now? Maybe like a year or two around when anti-map discourse was a hot trend on here” - EdibleMeteor, here (edit: not a radfem that was my bad)

Option #1: Deny that they ever were a radfem in the first place or that they know anything about radfems

“You’re not leaving the ~*radfem community*~ because you were clearly never a part of it. You don’t even have a basic understanding of gender critical feminism, let alone have anything accurate or of value to say about it“ - tamaramaclaywasaterf, this post

“You are the shit that needs to go [...] she’s no lesbian & what she wants to change is being honest that she is a bihet. But she’s just yr sideblog sock puppet anyways fuck off forever” - td-rudefem4life, here

“Maybe come up with some actual critiques of radical feminism instead of pulling made up BS from your ass” - manic-pixie-dream-goblin, here

“everything you’ve spoken about in this post is blatantly untrue, and the fact that you posted any of this at all means that you didn’t read a word of what anyone said while you were with us. in fact, most of this is just flat-out projection. i’m sorry for you, and i hope someday you’ll really learn and understand radical feminism.” - a user whose name I will never be able to spell, here

Option #2: Just tell them that they’re an awful person and that they should die / get fucked / call them slurs, etc.

“You were obviously just trans all along simply pretending to be a radfem so you could make this little post. Let me tell you something - actual radical feminists would NEVER switch positions [...] and no feminist could ever be conservative. You are more conservative than any feminist woman, you vile piece of shit. Anyway, rot in hell, homophobe.” - Xxposinglesbophobes, here (note that LFH didn’t say she was a conservative)

“Please go get fucked by your trannydick cuck boys. I’m glad I’m [n]ot a worthless sack of shit :)” - Helladea, here

Option #3: Assume the blog (and any attention it might get) are made by your Enemies (TM) (bigots, trans people, men, libfems, mras, etc.)

“Typical lying snakes using straight up projecting to pain radfems as boogeyman made of straw” - in Happibeans’ callout post here, claiming that LFH is racist/violent in radfem chats. She states that the chats are the reason LFH chose to leave radical feminism. Which is kind of interesting since LFH left posted about having doubts over 5 months ago.

“This account is 100% a troll that pretended to be a lesbian 3 days ago and now is a traumatised bihet that wants dick” - td-rudefem4life, here

“tbh a lot of the most vehement, aggressive, unhinged “radfems” active in the community scream ~infiltrator~ to me. if more of them are exposed or expose themselves as libfems or mras posing as Crazy TERFS!! ™ itd be no big surprise either.”  - scenewannabe, here

“I’m beginning to think that OP was an infiltrator/troll to begin with” - Sundazesun, here

What does this show?

Ultimately, I do not know if LFH really did make racist comments or have other problems in the radfem community.

What I DO know, though, is that people have been falsely claiming she is a trans women, that she is bisexual, that her blog is new, that she said she wants dick, and that she never understood radical feminism in the first place, 100% based on her criticisms in the post about how she felt ‘lured into’ radical feminism in a vulnerable time in her life. And, possibly if the accusations are misleading/untrue, they could be just straight-up slandering her.

EVERY person in a community, no matter how noble their goal is supposed to be, should take very seriously complaints people have of being hurt by that community. If you don’t, and that person’s complaint IS real, then you’ve doubly victimised them and created a situation where someone else in the same vulnerable situation may be hurt after them. That goes for trans-inclusive people too (especially ya’ll who send anon hate, for srs).

[pikaflute]

Being wrong is hard work. We as people like to be right and correct all the time. Being wrong feels....well wrong. You feel ashamed for your mistakes and like total shit when you’re wrong. We strive to always be correct and right all the time, but you’re never going to be right all the time. Hell, even as I’m typing this I know I’ve been wrong and time to time I fuck up. 

But see, I and many other people change frequently. I am not the same person i was when I started this blog back in 2014. I’m much more aware of the consequences of my actions as I’ve grown up and matured and am more aware of fuck ups I make. Changing and growing up is hard, and many people are stubborn and don’t want to do it. Taking accountability has to put them in this awkward confrontational spot that makes them actually take responsibility and they don’t want to do it.

With that in mind, I’m here to say shut the fuck up. So what? You’re wrong. Admit that you fucked up. Apologize. Take responsibility for what you did an become a better person.

The elephant in the room is obviously Gaud. This is not their first time up to the tumblr discourse bat, and while, yes, sending death threats is a little extreme, fans of Gaud seem to think that’s all that is happening. But it’s not. People just want accountability. They want Gaud to just apologize cleanly for lesbophobia and saying the nword while Gaud is not black.

But Gaud either refuses to apologize cleanly or just, dismisses all criticism as angry trolls who are TERFs (their fans did this more than Gaud themself did) or not really black ("Due to the details of call out culture, it’s difficult for me to ascertain if any of the criticism I’ve begun receiving is from actual black voices, or if (as I suspect) it is almost entirely from the group of trolls who have been targeting my blog over the last few months, and appropriating minority voices as an excuse. I am very ready to listen to feedback and criticism about the post in question, but from black voices specifically. If I was disrespectful, I want to fix that. But I’m damn tired of trolls speaking for (and erasing) minority voices as an excuse to harass people online.“).

The first apology regarding the lesbophobia was okay in theory. However, their tags say and I quote “#the only purpose of these dumbass shitposts is to make people laugh #while also feeling the need to check under the bed for monsters” which seems a little disingenuous, as if to say “i don’t know why everyone is so mad, these were just jokes”

No you may be wondering why I said in theory this apology was good. Well this reply popped up calling angry and upset lesbians abusive shitheads and Gaud basically agreeing with what they said. Yeah real fucking sorry huh. Not to mention basically pubically posting the urls of angry lesbians who were rightly felt mad at their lesbophobia as “hatemail”.

Their second more recent apology was even worse. If we’re not counting how they basically don’t believe many people criticizing them were not black they don’t even apologize for using it. They say “I chose not to censor the word when copying the quote b/c Sam purposely uses it as a powerful final note to her speech, and at the time I was concerned that censoring it would be dishonest, and catering to white discomfort.” This is excusing it, it’s not even an apology. They even start the post with “ I’ve been accused of using the N word.“ as if they don’t even know what the problem is. And they use it again in that “apology post! They basically learnt nothing!

This is also not addressing the female socialization comment they made which is transmisogynistic. Specifically in the tags of this post (now deleted) said “ #i’m nonbinary but i’ve been socialized and perceived female my whole life which means there is a huge overlap bt the female experience and my experiences.” Whether Gaud meant to or not, this in itself is transmisogynistic, as TERFs use it to say trans women are not real women since they have been “male socialized” instead of female socialized. I am not a trans woman myself, so my knowledge is pretty limited, however the callout I have linked in the bottom of this post does go into it in more detail in the transmisogynist section

So why did they delete the tags? Well, they made this post after deleting said tags. You may notice that isn’t apology, this is an attempt to garner sympathy.  And before you say it, yes Gaud made an apology in the replies of the original post they made. But why only in the replies? Just posting a really shitty post that is like “well these meanies don’t like me because I can’t apologize correct!” just makes people like you even less.

Finally, in this post they admit they cannot take criticism. But this reply sucks. They say they’ve never learned how to process criticism from their parents/adults (ignoring the fact that responding to criticism depends on you specifically and also they literally just shifted the blame of them no being able to do as their parent’s fault what???). They also say they can’t reply correctly to criticism because of “angry scrutiny & criticism from anonymous internet users who may or may not already have decided I’m irredeemably”. Which is like...huh? You can’t reply to criticism because people don’t like you for the thing that they’re criticizing you for? What are they supposed to do then? Gaud also employed self-deprecation “Or I’m a shitty garbage person who should delete their blog." and specific tags such as “im sorry for bumming ya’ll out” which is more of a cry for sympathy than an actual apology.

In conclusion, Gaud needs to learn how to apologize and handle criticism. They need to realize that people who is criticizing them is not a hater out to get them, and have valid critiques. Sometimes people are going to be angry, but you can’t dismiss someone because they’re angry at you. As someone who is autistic as well, I understand that communication can be difficult but you need to take responsibility regardless. As I said earlier, just admit that you fucked up. These wishy washy and sympathy grabbing replies aren’t going to cut it.

Not everyone is going to like you Gaud. Not everyone is going to forgive you. And that’s okay! I think personally if you apologized without trying to make yourself seem like the person who’s been wronged more people would see that as a step in the right direction. It’s just so far, every attempt Gaud has made has not done that as I’ve explained.

And to Gaud’s fans, wanting Gaud to properly apologize is not callout culture. It’s wanting an adult to take responsibility for their actions.

Here’s a more in depth callout post for gaud to read at your leisure as well. TW: for rape, pedophilia, antisemitism, incest, anti black racism and lesbophobia.