#they're all merged onto now that has some touch ups

[chickenmcnuggies]

now that im finished with this gay fates update i figured i’d show off the other modding project i’ve been working on, which is a dwarf fortress mod to add a lot of stock fantasy creatures i was disappointed weren’t in the game (or any other mods)

This isn’t all of them, but the sprites im most happy with

cockatrice male and female (megabeast, the snake head on the tail injects a venom that paralyzes their foes)

centaur male and female (sentient and similar to animal people)

peryton

various different ent caste

mogalls (a la fire emblem, shadows of velentia’s design specifically)

quetzalcoatl

wurm (megabeast, based on the wurm design from dungeon meshi)

wyverns (come in 4 different colors!)

phoenix (megabeast, skin made of stone and blood made of magma)

griffon and hippogriff (hippogriff are common domestics)

[subwaytostardew]

Subway to Stardew - Passenger Events - Saloon Part 2

This plays after you see the first saloon event (submas having lunch with Elliott!) and visit on a Friday after reaching 3 hearts with Elesa.

Commentary under the read-more!

Did you notice the sprites? No? Great! I finally stopped procrastinating and recolored their spritesheets so now they don't share the same brown outline and match vanilla style a bit more!

Sprite-wise... they're over 80. Emmet's in his 90's.

So many sprites.....

Also... Elesa's back! We have a basic outline for what would happen in Elesa's events, but we haven't written anything for her yet... She has plans though! She's rounding up all the artists for it. Meanwhile, submas are still struggling with passenger relations.

Elesa's storyline is going to be fun to plan out but one of her B plots is making sure Ingo and Emmet take their breaks!

Elesa's fun. She's a bit awkward herself (girl can NOT keep a secret for the life of her) but she's doing things. Nimbasa trio share a braincell and they pass it around throughout this event.

We wanted to show a little more insight into their life in the valley and how others feel about them. This time, you're catching them on a bad day. One of my favorite things about Stardew is how everyone is very much flawed in some way and everyone is an unreliable narrator. I love how it just presents life in a run-down town as is and it's up to you to interpret whatever glimpses you get.

Trying to merge the two different media's in terms of tone and seriousness is a bit complex. Pokémon - as a franchise - is at the end of a the day; kid friendly. Stardew Valley, while may look happy go lucky and cute touches upon some really heavy topics.

We are basically skirting the lines here and there with the themes and even trying to make it in character for the Pokémon characters as well.

Taking a kid friendly characters and just trying to touch upon tough subjects while also trying not to seem OOC or off - is tough. So creative liberties it is.

Not everyone gets along in Stardew. I tried to emphasize that in Sebastian's distaste for submas. He would hate being their neighbor. He's cranky because he can't sleep in until 10:00 AM anymore because they're already at work before it turns 6:00 in the morning. Extreme opposites with their problems.

Sebastian and Submas DO NOT get along... They may tolerate each other at the end of the story but they just do not mix well.

I also think that Sebastian would just project a lot of his personal problems onto them... He already does that with Maru. He's not the best taking out his frustrations in the right direction. Haven't finished Maru's passenger event yet (another battle event...) but submas would be decently close with her since she has an interest in Pokemon and Sebastian would take that as "siding" against him. They are also decently aquainted with Demetrius which isn't the best for Sebastian's dad issues. He's not fond of the invasive species they brought in but they do appreciate infodumping to each other about mechanics and such.

Oh, Demetrius... I'm going to have fun with world building info-dumps with him. Ya'll like world building? Well, talk to the villagers, they may have a glimpse into things.

I do headcanon Demetrius (pretty much painfully canon...), Maru, and Sebastian as autistic themselves just like the Nimbasa trio. Unfortunately, that does not necessarily mean that they'll always have solidarity. For one, Sebastian's sensitivity to loud noises puts him at odds with Ingo. Submas fare better with the more infodumpy types.

Sibling relations are a sore subject for all of them so submas are horrified at even the thought of splitting tracks and hating each other because they have codependency issues; Sebastian has an inferiority complex and hates how they make him feel like even more of a failure because he doesn't like Maru. Neither parties are exactly healthy, but you can pick between who you're going for! (I was curious as to what the deal was with Sebastian so he was the first bachelor I married... I think you can tell that I divorced him.)

Sebastian has his issues... He was also going to be my first bachelor but uhh, I went with Harvey. I still love Sebastian as a character tho, he is really complex especially family dynamic wise. I do feel bad for him....

He does. I do appreciate how messy his family dynamic is, but I'm a little biased against him since I appreciate Maru and Demetrius more (sorry). I really like how he doesn't handle his issues healthily (I mean... look at Emmet.) and it's interesting to compare him to the other characters.

Like Sam! Sam's a good kid (college age 20 something year old...) and actually really emotionally mature even if he's a bit childish at times. Abigail... isn't quite all there yet but she has a strong sense of what's right and wrong. She's less hesitant than Sam when it comes to things, but Sam serves a bit as damage control here. I headcanon Sam and Abigail to have ADHD so they kind of have an idea about submas being autistic and what that entails, but it's not at the forefront of their mind. It doesn't help that their autism manifests in verrrrry different ways and they don't really know them all that well in the first place. It's a bit awkward between them but they're okay with each other.

We had a bit of fun determining the heart point changes between each route. Personally, I think friendship decreases are hilarious. Also if you don't back up anyone in this situation then... 🤨

(1) Sebastian -

Ingo -100 | Emmet -250 | Sebastian +250 | Sam -5 | Abigail -15

(2) Ingo -

Ingo +40 | Emmet +5 | Sebastian -100 | Sam -20 | Abigail -25

(3) Emmet -

Ingo +25 | Emmet +30 | Sebastian -100 | Sam -5 | Abigail -5

(4) Sam and Abigail -

Ingo +20 | Emmet +5 | Sebastian -40 | Sam +50 | Abigail +50

(5) Nobody -

Ingo -50 | Emmet -200 | Sebastian -200 | Sam -50 | Abigail -50

I don't see friendship decreases as characters getting angry at you per se. It can always just be them feeling awkward and wanting to distance themselves from you for a bit. For example, if you reject Ingo in his 8 heart event, you get knocked down two hearts just so you can get more friendly-but-not-too-friendly dialogue before it stagnates again at 8 hearts.

The "true ending" is Sam and Abigail's route since they're fairly neutral picks. You should stand up for them! Sebastian would agree that him lashing out was wrong, but he just doesn't want to talk to you about it. Why would he? You would just lecture him or something.

Bad ending is not siding with anybody like a coward. Sebastian's being a bit of a bully here (mainly to a grown man a whole head taller than him, but still, his friends got caught in the crossfire) and if you're wishy-washy then that's just odd of you as the town's farmer and supposed protagonist that goes out of their way to befriend everyone. Not a good look.

Sebastian's route is a bit of a jab at how his romance plays out. A few people have mentioned Emmet and Sebastian being friends with each other under the reasoning that they're lonely autists (but mostly just being favorites, which I get) buuuut... Not sure why you would go for Sebastian when submas is right there. Pick one or the other. They're enemies here. I can't quite see them getting along past that surface-level analysis. Smoking alone is a hard No. from Emmet since birds are super sensitive to airborne toxins (so much so, you can't even have non-stick pans around them!) and he's protective over his defeatist of an Archeops.

Ingo's route is more for fun than anything. If you really want Ingo, you do get the most points with him for mentioning him, but he's confused as to why you're trying to win him over now of all times. He's concerned about Emmet first and foremost!

Emmet has trust issues so even the slightest red flag puts a quite a bit of distance between you. He has low point increases because it's hard to win his trust. In this situation, a point increase mostly just means you didn't do anything wrong. If you side with him, that's what you're supposed to do since he's the side against Sebastian. He may be getting picked on, but he's a bit of an instigator himself. His own route aside, Ingo would be most pleased to see you speak up for his brother. Ingo's route is only has the highest point increases for him because it's well, his.

As for the bar fight... It was a bit difficult to figure out how to make it play out believably and interestingly despite it being three New Yorkers against some grocery store owner. Ingo is more focused on defense, de-escalation, and protecting his passengers (in this case, the college kids). He can take a hit and doesn't want to resort to making any attacks unless absolutely necessary, so he was blocking for the most part. Had Ingo not been the designated grocery shopper, Pierre and Emmet probably would have already killed each other. Emmet doesn't have the patience to deal with Pierre. He thinks Reshiram will smite him for upcharging them and will take it upon himself to deliver the justice of truth. Emmet's swinging at Pierre. Unfortunately, he doesn't have the best defense nor balance when he's kicking and punching. Pierre's too drunk to talk about it, but even sober he suspects that submas are working with Joja because as far as he knows, he saw Morris walk away from the Railroad when they first arrived.

Ah yes. Joja stuff. *Realigns stacks of papers* Lets touch upon Joja here for a moment and Pierre's view of things. When Submas first came around. Pierre was already suspicious of them - more confused if anything - why are two major city boys who also- mind you- come from a foreign region and bring along Pokémon. Take interest in a small town? With an abandon railroad? Right off the bat he does not have a great view; he is worried about his store, his income, and family and this is stemmed all due to Joja Mart.

Now Pierre spots Morris heading towards the railroad - of course Pierre does not know what the interactions between Submas and Morris are. In his mind it's Submas making a deal to work with them or is already with them! Pierre already hates Morris as it is.

That is why he is so passive aggressive to Ingo and Emmet. Just this time around - Pierre is drunk... and Abigail's friend is being "annoyed" by them.

Well... outright agressive in this event haha. I don't quite remember how the idea was finalized, but we decided that they would get into a barfight when doing another "showing passenger relations at the Saloon" event.

As for Joja itself. I most definitely headcannon them in this whole crossover universe as the typical "bad guy" Pokémon team. However they have already won/succeeded (Pokémon are no longer in The Ferngill Republic....) However things are now being shaken up and changing.

I could go on and on about Joja and how I view them... but I think that will be a separate post (if people want to know)

The fight was a pain to debug. For one, Pierre kept running off into the void like a coward. Ingo's lines about staying behind the yellow line were made in the debugging phase because I got fed up with him for doing that.

Worse yet. 1.6 broke the Pokemon animations so now I have to go back into every event and redo everything (RIP green bean X-Scissor). The old method I was using no longer worked; before, I was using the addObject command. Now they show up as error signs because the sprites that were previously on the sheet called from were removed as they are not valid objects.

I ended up having to figure out the temporarySprites command to replace the "using a Pokeball" animation. There are no instances of it being used in vanilla. Nobody seemed to figure it out either, so I had to make a mini-event just to test its usage and figure it out.

I eventually did. Thanks to the help of my emotional support Emmet.

Ah yes... 1.6 has broken some events. Small things. (events are still playable) But we will definitely be revisiting some events to improve or make better. Or to just fix.

I have so much backtracking to do 😭😭😭😭😭 Oh well... I thought events were safe to work on since barely anything about them changed in 1.6... I was wrong.

The ending had quite a bit of revising for concision and tone. It was much more lighthearted in Kade's drafts, but I figured that Emmet is low on steam and probably would have gone nonverbal after everything. Too much passenger interaction for the day. He just wants to depart back to his home station.

Yeah there was a lot of dialog and exposition cut. (Hmm no wonder why it's only 13 minutes long. lol)

Only 13 minutes... Still a lot considering that most vanilla events are around the 1-3 minute mark...

Poor Emmet.. and Ingo. I won't lie, when first seeing the event I burst out laughing during the fistfight. Just somthing about Ingo suddenly collapsing due to Pierre. BUT THEY'RE OKAY - ISH.

It's a bit comical! I had fun ragdolling them. Emmet was going to be much more swingy in his attacks but I ended up not keeping it in since it just didn't look right when used as an animation frame.

We at least kept one of the rag-doll sprite as a "knock back" from Pierre. Which transitions well with his passed out sprite.

Until next time! Thank you for boarding!

[turner-strait]

this accidentally turned into a mini-fic so there's a readmore lol

Alright, peppinises I have something for consideration

Peppino enters the WAR level, fully knowing that it's going to fuck with him. like it's CLEARLY a last resort kind of deal. But he goes in, ready to take things on-- and oh god he has to speed through the whole thing. Okay, face doesn't falter, can't let your enemy show that you're weak; so he hurdles on, saving toppins and busting through walls and shooting through obstacles

He entered it relatively fine. Upon seeing the door, he knew it was supposed to fuck with him. So he decided that it wouldn't fuck with him.

Except it did. As soon as he makes it out of there, toppins and Gerome in hand, he completely breaks down. Not immediately, but gradually. Once it's all over, and everyone is saved (including the treasure), it all crashes down on him. How fucked up this was. How his experience was used against him. Weaponized against him, even. To make him weaker.

He leans against the wall next to the entrance, staring off into space, barely noticing the tears that keep falling. He blinks them away but other than that, doesn't care about it. The toppins huddle up to him like the critters they are, but are surprised that he doesn't react. Even Gerome, who's technically done this with him dozens of times by now, can't seem to get through to him. So he just sits by him, hoping that his presence (as well as the toppins') is at least some sort of distant relief

Later, some bouncy noises are heard, and for a moment Gerome fears for the worst. But it's just Brick, and Gustavo in tow. The two seem unsure for a moment, but then spot Peppino, still in a complete breakdown; Gustavo is quick to go over and plant himself in front of the man.

Gustavo, recognizing what is happening, gently takes one of Peppino's hands in his own. He doesn't pry it away from where Peppino is cowering, but takes it in any case, giving it a gentle squeeze.

At the motion, Peppino jerks and gasps, momentarily terrified of the touch. But even through his traumatized, muddled mind, he recognizes Gustavo. He gasps again for a moment, and then looks around. His mind is spinning; he was just back in the war, why is he in a corridor with his friends??

Gustavo brushes his thumb over his hand, and Peppino jerks and gasps again, shocked by the gesture. But what he sees is just Gustavo, smiling at him, gently squeezing and rubbing his hand.

Peppino is suddenly aware of something by his side, and almost jumps in terror, but recognizes Gerome's (literal) frame next to him. The janitor is looking up at him with concern, which melts away as Peppino pats his head.

Suddenly, bugs are crawling all over him, and he's terrified again. He's about to scream, but a little squeeze from Gustavo has him looking at the shorter man. "It's okay, Pino. It's the toppins. You saved them. You did a fantastic job."

At that, Peppino darts his eyes around, and sure enough, the bugs were in fact the toppins he had so desperately wanted to save. They're all resting on his legs or have climbed on his chest or shoulders, and he sees now that they all look just as concerned as Gerome did. And Gustavo. And Brick, for that matter.

With a choked sob, Peppino practically crushes Gustavo against himself. He holds onto the other man with dear life, fully allowing his formally restrained feelings to burst. Gustavo, shocked at first, accepts the embrace, and returns it with all his heart. Even going so far as to nuzzle Peppino, if it makes him feel better.

Seeing this, Gerome can't help but join in, and sits down by Peppino's side, placing a firm hand on his leg to let him know he's there and that things are alright.

As Peppino cries, the toppins merge again, now brave enough to realize that he knows who they are. So they plant themselves wherever they want to be; it doesn't matter, as long as Peppino is comforted.

And for now, he is.

[heenuna]

lavender garden; part 1

pairing: vampire!reader / human!heeseung

genre: vampire au, a kind of angst,

warnings: dom!reader, sub!heeseung, mentions of blood, death, funerals, kind of first love, deliberate betrayal (kinda)

word count: 4k+

tag list: @laxatives4hre @wntrsgf @sweetiehyuka @jngsngie @wakeyjaykey @fallinforgyu @moonxchan 🖤

part 2

it's been so many days since everything changed. centuries, decades.. time is rushing inexorably forward. people are born, grow old, and die, and you, as a silent witness, watch the course of their lives, not knowing whether your own life will move forward or whether you are frozen in eternity.

as you play with a rose stalk, you watch the funeral procession. a small group of people dressed in black sobs softly as the poor-looking coffin is lowered down into the pit. someone moans, someone cries softly, someone says goodbye to the deceased with a blank look.  everything is the same as always. people don't change. they are still mortals.

your gaze, heavy as a monolith, falls on the scarlet petals. the rose has already begun to fade slowly, and you can't help it. its petals, delicate and delicate, gradually acquire a dirty shade, and it no longer looks the same as before. all flowers fade. all people die. it's just a truth worth accepting.

a faded rose. you think of all the roses you once plucked, and it becomes unbearable to look at the one that rests so gently on your fingers. its thorns, its nectar, the rose seems so perfect, but it's only a matter of time before it rots like any other rose. it simply has no choice.

and people don't have it. they just exist.

the clouds are slowly gathering, the street is getting dark and it's going to rain soon. drop by drop, drop by drop, it will fall down, people will run and hide from it, and you will only freeze in your place. how much rain have you seen? you've been soaked to the skin under it so many times already, it would be foolish to be afraid of it. it's just rain, it's just a cold drop enriched with ozone. it's just water.

when you took one last look at the mourners, you just smiled faintly and got up from the gravestone you were sitting on. judging by the dates, this is the burial place of some long-lived old woman. well, you hope she doesn't mind your temporary, short-term neighborhood. you don't care if she doesn't mind, you're already leaving anyway.

you walk at a moderate pace along the stone path, looking around at the graves and benches, and you think that you could also be lying here somewhere, dry and cold, slowly turning to dust. your remains would make a great meal for some worms, but no. they're not going to eat you. it's not your time yet.

passing the central gate and flowerbeds, you step out onto the deserted sidewalk and look around. there are no people in sight, only a bluish fog is visible from both sides. what time is it now? is it really evening already? it probably is. the street was wallowed in silence.

as you breathe the air out of your lungs with your mouth, you feel them contract in a barely perceptible spasm. your head gives in to a momentary weakness for a couple of moments, and you almost fall on the asphalt wet with fog. damn. the familiar stiffness in the arms and legs, the shortness of breath – a sure hunger syndrome. how long have you been eating? you can't even remember the last time right away, so it's a sure sign to go find something. or rather, someone.

your fangs ache uncomfortably at the thought of someone's warm blood. your hungry imagination conjures up a clear picture of veins, throbbing arteries, and warm skin that you'd be so happy to touch with your fingers. an imaginary smell of life and health fills your nostrils, and you exhale through your mouth again, realizing how hungry you really are.

your vision is slightly blurred as you walk through the streets and squares, trying not to give yourself away. people passing by don't even look at you, you seem to have merged with nature and ceased to be something important, and this is good. stealth now will help more than ever. you need to make the right choice. look around.

maybe this cute girl in the plaid dress? no, she's too small, and it would be a pity to leave bruises on her.

a weird guy in a hoodie? no, you shouldn't eat any rubbish.

or maybe.. your eyes quickly shift to another option that really seems different from the others: tall, slightly thin, standing at a bus stop. his already well-worn brown leatherette bag looks stuffed with something heavy. maybe some papers? as you can see, the shirt is wrinkled, probably from long work, and the suit, which is gaudy and dull black, looks quite cheap. gentlemen don't wear that. so he's just a student or an intern, one of two things. but it doesn't matter.

you move slowly in his direction with a familiar step, slightly accelerating when the oncoming bus comes into your field of vision. even from a distance, you can see how a stranger's facial expression changes when he, too, notices the approach of transport. his eyes widen slightly, and a small smile appears on his face. usually, facial expressions are the least of your worries, but this time you'd really like to see his full lips break into a smile again.

by the way, in one of the most charming smiles you've ever seen. cutie.

it's a good thing you can follow him. the bus is half-empty, and your target slowly passes along it, to the very end, and takes a place next to the window. you follow him. your feet are pleasantly warm from running heaters, and you are mentally glad that people have learned to take care of themselves. their bodies are so fragile, so soft, juicy and warm..

"excuse me, sir, can i sit here?" you stop right in front of a strange guy and lean forward a little to get a better look at his features. fortunately, he instantly turns to your voice, and a pair of large, shining eyes rests on you. they are a warm chocolate color, tempting to look out from under long lashes, slightly trembling with surprise. full lips of a delicate pink color, probably from constant bites, form the letter "o", and the tip of the pretty nose trembles slightly from inhaling. your perfume tickles his receptors too much.

"yes, yes, of course," he nods quickly, looking away, feeling his ears turn a little red. he wonders why such a beautiful girl chooses a seat next to him when there are still plenty of seats on the bus, why she smiles at him and why she smells so good and what kind of perfume is this? you seem to be rapidly occupying his thoughts. you can't hide the way he nervously clutches the strap of his bag, or the way he sneaks a smile, hesitating and not knowing whether to start a conversation or not to bother you. he's confused.

"i'm sorry, i must be very intrusive, but what's your name?" your question sends a dozen goosebumps down his spine, and he looks at you uncomfortably. his cheeks turn pink, giving his face a fresh, youthful look that makes you lose your head when you're hungry. he bites his lower lip a little, trying to sound as confident as possible, and you just stare at him. this guy is like the freshest rose that has just opened.

"lee heeseung.." the voice comes out somewhat shaky and quiet, but it's no less melodic. it envelops your head, your thoughts, and most importantly, briefly dulls your thirst, and you let out a relaxed sigh, smiling at it. he's too cute to take his life, but also too good to let go. you get lost in doubt, and greed literally takes over you.

"nice to meet you, I _____. you're so beautiful," the words come out of your mouth and, of course, completely destroy what you've already built up. his cheeks, which were just pink before, are covered with a deep blush, as if for the first time he found out how beautiful he is. his whole body tenses at the compliment, and a sweet smell begins to waft through the air, like lavender, something so sweet that it feels like thousands of acres of the freshest spring flowers. you can barely make out the sound, but you already know that it completely fascinates you. his eyes run excitedly over the metal floor of the bus.

"t-thank you, it was unexpected.." his confused babble makes your insides tighten in a pleasant spasm again, and you lean in a little closer, making mistake after mistake. the smell gets stronger, and you rush to inhale it, just so that no one can touch it now that he's so close.

"i'm sorry, i'm just being blunt. by the way," you pause a little, leaning even closer to his neck. he freezes, this closeness with a strange girl both beckons and scares, and hee just gets lost in the sensations. right and wrong are mixed into one, "you smell so good, what kind of perfume is this?"

heeseung frowns slightly, trying to piece together the last of his sober thoughts and remember what kind of perfume he's wearing. the truth is that the boy doesn't wear perfume, and if you were in your right mind, instead of lavender and freshness, you would only smell old papers, cheap soap, and, oddly enough, sweat. such an unromantic outcome might have come out, if not for the hunger that romanticizes the desired prey.

"i-i don't wear any.."

"so you smell good on your own.." you move very close to his neck, feeling the life pounding nervously in his veins. it's like music to your hungry ears. as much as you'd like to attack him right now, this tactic isn't the best one, so you need to be careful. you need to be smarter.

"t-thank you.." up close, his voice seems even more melodic, and you shrug your shoulders at his modest thanks, watching the carotid artery throb under your thin skin. so beautiful and so delicious. the sound of his moans is already ringing in your ears, but you should be more focused, you're on the prowl.

"i'm sorry to embarrass you so much," you find the strength to pull away from him, and he exhales calmly, relaxing. his eyes come back up to you, and he relaxes even more at your embarrassed smile. a warm feeling slowly spreads through his heart.

"no, no, it's okay, you smell good too.." if he could, he would copy your movement and also cling to your neck, but his back feels like it's made of stone and he can barely move his head smoothly without fear of doing something awkward. it only amuses you. so many centuries of studying people have not been in vain, and you can say with confidence that the fish is hooked and enthusiastically beats its fins, waiting for you to pull the rod.

"do you work in court? you're wearing the right suit, you must be a lawyer, " you gaze dreamily at his body, not caring if your lie is obvious or not. your mind is completely occupied with imagining how you will finally pinch it somewhere around the corner and start your feast. he would definitely start to feel shy, naively assuming that you wanted him, but once your fangs sank into his warm, soft neck, he wouldn't be so sure. his hands would reach out to push you away, but..

speaking of hands. when you look down at his hands, you can't help but notice how beautiful and delicate his fingers look, decorated with calluses from constant writing. they twitch, contract, slide over each other, making your imagination draw another picture. he's lying on white sheets, without clothes or anything else, and you can enjoy the way his body smells alluring, the way his blood boils, the way his heart beats, full of charming feelings for you. you imagine being able to kiss the back of his hand, then his wrist, then each finger individually.

you're sure his skin feels incredibly soft on your tongue, and just thinking about it takes your breath away. not sure if it's because of thirst or not, you bite your lower lip, deciding not to ruin this boy. just killing it would be a blasphemy against nature and aesthetics, being created so beautiful is a gift that has its own purpose. you're pretty cocky to say he was made for you.

"oh, no, i.." he stutters for a second, trying to frame the sentence in a way that doesn't make him look like a jerk in front of you, "..i'm still in school and i have an internship there, but i'm already promised a good position because i'm bright and good at studying.."

his heart sinks a little when he notices how thoroughly you're looking at it. a pleasant chill passes over my stomach, my cheeks turn even more pink, and my thoughts are already going somewhere far away. while your eyes are lowered, he has the opportunity to examine your facial features and be surprised at how beautiful you are.

the way your hair lies, the way your eyelashes flutter, the way you sit and smile at something, every detail of you seems unreal, as if you stepped out of the pages of classic novels that he read in his youth.

the fact that you've noticed someone as extraordinary as he is, he sees it as a great success. for the first time in his life, he feels special, someone who finds himself in the center of events, and someone who causes interest.

"no wonder you have such prospects," your lips slowly break into a smirk when you finally look up from his fingers. something in your eyes whispers to him about danger and risk, but he ignores all the flags and signs, his thoughts and heart are already rushing towards you. some stranger showed interest in a loser, that's the plot!

anyway, tactics are tactics, and a plan is a plan, and you have to follow it so that the main prize really goes to you. so it's time to take a step back..

you look at the window and make a slightly surprised expression on your face, exclaim, "oh, i think it's my stop!" from the frightened and worried expression on his face, you understand how much he is confused, and that's why from now on the initiative will be his. heeseung must fulfill his role.

you lean closer to him and smile and whisper, "baby, my number is 5914874, be sure to call me when you get home, and.." doubts are swaying a little, you are not acting according to your principles right now, but the hunger is too strong and you want to get everything at once, so you have to step out of your comfort zone and be a little more careful.

placing your hand gently on his cheek, you smooth your thumb over his cheekbone as your lips break into a smile. the skin of his face is so soft that you could snuggle up to it forever, but the bus stops slowly, time running out. you look into his eyes, which are shining with surprise, once again, finishing your sentence, "..don't even think that i won't find you."

to any normal person, such a phrase from a stranger would seem like a threat, but not to heeseung. the way you tenderly made him realize that he was needed, made everything in the world lose its meaning for him. you're waiting for his call. you're waiting for him. the storm of thoughts is dizzying, everything is confused, only a clear set of seven digits remains motionless. you can't forget them. 5914874 is the number of his lucky ticket to a new, finally not so gray life.

he is only 21, he is young and has everything ahead of him. a beautiful girl is waiting for his call. the day is a success.

and your day was a success, too. this can't just be a coincidence. this is a real gift of fate. as you breathe in the cold air, you can still smell the strong scent of lavender floating around you. your palms can still feel the warmth of his skin. damn.

who would have thought that the hunt would go so well. yes, your insides are still cramped with hunger, but your thoughts are filled to the brim with just the boy named lee hiseong. fucking angel lee hiseun.

humming a strange, cheerful tune, you quickly put your house key in the lock and open the door, literally flying inside. the door slams shut, but that's nothing. you don't hear it. why, you don't see anything. there's only hisung in front of you. how is it that only an ordinary person can turn your head?

you don't have an answer to this question, but you do know that the world will soon reward you for your patience. and your reward will be a regular feeding of the best blood of the best boy.

speaking of blood quality.

you can't help but think that modern students hardly take care of themselves, which means that the quality of their health and blood suffers.

ugh. just the thought of tasteless blood soaked in chemicals and excess sugar gives you a nervous shiver. and if he is?

worry doesn't have time to take over your thoughts. you exhale calmly. "i'll just feed him properly and take care of his body, and then the blood will be fine. well, he will pass a couple of tests, well, i'll take him to the springs or to the mountains, will all this spending scare me? " of course not. after all, if you plan to keep it, you should learn to take care of something so fragile and precious.

damn, that's right. an hour ago, you wanted to kill him somewhere on the street, leaving his body drained of blood to the worms and birds. how quickly a cute adorable boy changed your position. "you're probably getting old," you tell yourself, looking in the mirror. your fingers lazily adjust your tangled curls.

suddenly, the dull silence of your lair is broken by the funny beeping of a landline phone. when you looked at the reflection of its black plastic surface, you smiled a little and turned around, reaching it in a few steps. your fingers confidently wrapped around the thin base, bringing the phone closer to your lips, " yes, baby?"

a few strange noises on the other end of the phone let you know that it really was heesung.

"uh, _____?" his voice sounds a little choked and unnatural, probably squeezing his shoulders or neck nervously as he tries to anticipate your next sentence and prepare an answer in advance. so cute and shy, you slowly twist a lock of hair around your finger, listening intently as he nervously inhales and exhales air from himself.

"yes, it's me. i've been waiting for your call, heeseung," you deliberately emphasize his name, spreading your lips in a smile so that your voice sounds as happy as possible. you could understand, you didn't know the boy very long ago, and you were hungry, so you'd either have to be fully armed, or you'd give up and give him up to someone else.

they'll do fine, you need this person.

"t-thank you for keeping me waiting. i accidentally fell on the way home, so i was late, " heeseung's leg twitched instinctively, his pants sticking to his bare skin, and he winced, not understanding why he was even telling such ridiculous things about himself. he just wants to talk.

excessive damage = the smell of blood, and you can't attract someone else's attention. after all, not only you will want a tasty morsel. "are you all right? did you damage anything?"

heeseung's heart warms, his cheeks turn even more pink, and he doesn't realize that both of his hands are gripping the phone in the most gentle way. "no, no, it's just a broken knee and a scratch, it'll heal quickly," he cheerfully reassures you, or so he thinks.

in fact, it's not so much the bruises that are bothering you as the oozing blood on your knee. damn. imagining the blood trickling slowly down his skinny legs, you exhale a little louder than usual, and heeseung flinches a little. your brain begins to actively select possible situations in which you could make a similar sound, from the most innocent to the dirtiest. the latter seem to him quite out of the ordinary.

"do you have a first aid kit?"

the flowing blood must be stopped. for example, with your tongue. or better yet, a blindfold. but you're hungry.. i'm so thirsty. the throat makes itself felt with an unpleasant burning sensation.

"yes, _____, i have everything. by the way, are you free on wednesday? " the unobtrusive question is incredibly difficult for him. his fingertips don't stop stroking the edges of the plastic tube until he can already hear your refusal in his mind and imagine you, so sweet and gorgeous, going to the most expensive restaurant with some rich guy. a chill runs through his chest and gets stuck somewhere in the middle, starting to choke him.

of course, what does he have? he's just a student who sits in the cafeteria during recess and works part-time on weekends sorting through paperwork. the house he lives in is rented. why, he doesn't even have a decent suit. what kind of dates? heeseung bites his lip guiltily, blinking his eyes in shame and frustration at himself, "damn, no, no, i'm sorry, i.."

"are you asking me out? i'm so glad. actually, i wanted to ask you out myself, but since you asked first.. where do we go? i like a pizza place out of town.. " you interrupt him with a practical one as soon as you sense that he's trying to get off the hook. grandpa always told you to be on time, so it's time to take that advice.

pizza place? what a liar you are. you laugh to yourself, thinking that you've never been a fan of pizza and haven't eaten it in 100 years, but then again, this is your tactic. heeseung is an ordinary student, with a small, unstable salary, an old, shabby suit and a crumpled shirt. but he's also the boy with the most sparkling eyes in the world and the softest skin in the world, so it's not hard to play along. let him feel like he's in charge as long as you like it.

"d-do you mind?" heeseung asks more of himself than you. the ground is slowly slipping out from under his feet. once again during this day, you turn a poor student into someone special, once again you don't follow the pattern, and once again you make heeseung's heart beat a little faster. he happily wipes his sweaty palm on his already dirty jacket.

"i want to go where you want to go, ____," you laugh happily, which makes heeseung think that his just-made-up cliché phrase has some effect on you, but in fact, we all know how cute boys who try to appear serious are in your eyes. will it go where you want it to go? a bold statement.

"great, then let's go there. i live at 184 north 6th street, what time will you pick me up?"

"a-around 6pm, is it okay?" he bites his lips in embarrassment once again and then immediately nods in relief when he hears your "uh-huh".

looking at your reflection in the mirror, you can not help but build a sly smile on your face. your fish swims by itself in the net, and you don't even need to do anything. he does everything by himself, "yes, of course, i wish it was wednesday," your dreamy voice, his trembling hands, it's like a fairy tale that finally happened to heeseung. he sprawls out, his back against the wall, his head raised to look up at the old, redecorated ceiling.

"y-yes, i'm looking forward to.." he barely whispers, his lips dry from constant biting, closing his eyes and losing himself in his reverie.

"yeah, we'll have a great time together, babe. and i have to go, i have work to do, but you can call me if you need to. and yes, don't be late," you quickly kiss the edge of your pipe and put it down, stretching contentedly.

if this isn't a heart attack, it's like cupid's arrow piercing the heart of a poor law student. 

[kwonhoshi0]

𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 | fic

navigation | requests : open | 12th march 2021

pairing : dabi x fem!reader

genre : fluff, angst

word count : 3.1k

warnings : fire, death, trauma

themes : strangers to lovers, mutual pining, denial, story changes,

summary : you had to get away from the toxicity that is your father and the hero society. after 17 years of being trapped, you finally have a chance to escape but with a man you didn’t really expect to help. you wondered why he helped you, you don’t know it’s because you don’t question his looks, you saw him not his scars.

you didn't plan for this, you didn't expect him to save you.

the corrupted superhuman society, the toxic society you lived in angered you. maybe things would've been different if your quirk, or your parents weren't who they are.

they wanted to mold you into the perfect weapon against villains, were the villains really the bad guys? who had the right of calling people heroes and villains. what separated them.

those thoughts you asked yourself each day growing up, if you could even call it that. 

everything was okay at first, you felt loved, but once your quirk manifested that changed, drastically.

training everyday until you couldn't move, the tears, the bruises. when would it be enough, is this really what it took to be a hero, to be deemed worthy of such a title?

you had already had to endure 12 years of training constantly, for your dad. you always wondered what is would've been like, to grow up in a stable happy home.

your father had been rejected by the superhuman society, his views were called sick and twisted. he wanted, needed to make you the best. that would've been okay if he let you have a childhood, if he trained you like a daughter not a robot. 

your fathers quirk is jet fire, he can quite literally make jets of fire with his mouth. the green haired man wasn't always bad, he didn't always push you or bruise you. you remembered there was a time, he would hold you, he’d spin you around. 

your quirk is the manipulation of fire, with the particles around you, you can create fire and other gases like smoke. it was a literal merge of your parents quirk, except you don’t breathe fire you create it with your hands.

your mother hasn't talked to you properly since your father started training you at the age of 5. maybe it was the guilt, she never questioned her husband, he had left another woman for your mother, personally you thought she was the last thing holding your fathers sanity together. the guilt of ruining you, corrupting you had haunted her so much she didn't even notice the scars and bruises on your body.

you had never had a real mother figure to show you how strong women are. she would never tell you this but she wondered where you got your anger and courage from.

everyone has a breaking point. yours was when you realized your parents would be living your life for you until they die. that terrified you more than you'd like to admit. the thought of living your life as a hero, a hero you didn't believe in or want to be. an entire lifetime in someone else’s shadow.

did you really live 17 years for this.

you thought about this as you stared up into your ceiling. it was 1am and you couldn't sleep, again.

you had had an argument with the green haired man you were cursed to call dad. it got heated and you locked yourself in your room, you had a bag packed full of clothes and money. staring at it you thought, is it worth it, will all this be worth it.

heroes and villains, you scoffed, they're all the same.

hearing loud steps coming up the stairs, you panicked standing up quickly and shoving the bag into your closet.

“y/n!”

“what” you looked at your door where the man stood, putting your book down next to you. 

“training in 1 hour” you stared at him incredulously, it is 1 fucking am and this lunatic wants me to train, Now.

“no” you deserve sleep, you only finished training a couple hours ago.

“you will train with me in one hour, or else i’m taking your phone and you’ll be training until tomorrow night.” you sighed frustrated and angry as he slammed your door shut. of course he’d take away my one fucking escape.

your eyes darted to the bag peaking out the corner of your closet, maybe today is the day.

you stared at it for a minute before grabbing the bag and checking everything was in there before grabbing a couple more items of clothing and your charger cable. you quickly got changed out of your training clothes and shoved on some baggy jeans and a black turtle neck with some boots. ‘fuck okay, we’re doing this’

you grabbed a pillow and shoved it under your sheets to make it look like you’re sleeping and opened your window, your room was on the second floor so you weren't worried about the drop, you jumped down using smoke to soften your fall and you ran through the alleyways of the city.

after an hour of running you leaned against the wall of an alley and checked your phone to see 30 missed calls from your father. before leaving you made sure to turn off the tracking app and restrictions on your phone.

as you turned to run through the alley you felt eyes on you, a cold breath made the hairs on your neck jolt up, yelping slightly you jumped forward to see.. some sort of sludge monster?

‘fuck’ you breathed as it backed you against the corner, throwing your bag to the side you floated up a little with your quirk and blasted fire at it, it parted where you aimed the fire before molding back together, ‘strong, worthy of me’ it breathed and it collided with you making you scream out in pain, it was agony, it felt like it was ripping you apart inside out.

you could hear voices coming closer but you were a little preoccupied. you had an idea, you slowly created as much fire you could with your hands, the creature shrieked pushing you away as you gasped air filling your lungs again.

you noticed a circular black matter at the end of the alley where the sludge monster appeared from, before you could inspect it it shrunk until it was nothing.

the same voices you heard earlier yelled as the sludge monster slipped through the drains “she’s valuable, she defeated that monster” a man said coming closer to you, you looked at him with furrowed eyebrows “touch me and you die” you breathed standing up from the dirty alley floor. “feisty too” he chuckled.

you were outnumbered, it was 6 to 1 in a small alleyway. before the men could come any closer a voice behind them made them turn, ‘the people you wanted dead are just that, where’s my payment ’ you couldn't see his face so you attempted to look around for an escape, you noticed a drain pipe leading up to a sturdier metal one, if you could jump onto the electric box and swing your up you could make it onto the roof, you just needed to time it perfectly.

one of the men turned to keep an eye on you, “we’ll have your payment in a week” the man in the middle scoffed turning back to you, “you know that’s not good enough, the payment, now or i’ll burn you to ashes” he said with venom laced in his voice, one of the 6 men had moved to the side, you had a clear few of who they were talking to you, you felt as your face heat up at him but you shook it off.

you raised an eyebrow at him signalling to the metal bar, you weren't sure if he’d help you but he’d probably help you if it was for his benefit as well. he flicked an eye between you and the metal bar immediately smirking at your plan. 

you took his smirk as a confirmation and grabbed your bag from the floor and lifted yourself up with smoke from your feet and jumped swinging yourself from the metal bar to the roof, before you could fully push yourself onto the roof you felt a hand gripping onto your leg, you tried shaking the man off only to feel blue heat take over the alley beneath you.

your eyes widened slightly as the scarred man continued burning the men below you, “stop it!” you yelled as he raised an eyebrow at you the blue flames dying down to nothing.

you sighed in relief rolling onto your back, the men scurried away, burnt but alive.

“why’d you stop me?” he asked, you supported yourself on your elbows as he climbed up onto the roof, he didn't look mad, it was a genuine question. “i don’t know maybe i didn't want to see anyone die.” you deadpanned sitting up dusting the dirt off of your clothes.

he looked at you as if you were the most confusing person in the world, you hadn't asked about his scars or flinched when you saw him, or stared at the purple marks around his face and body. he wanted to know why.

“what?, do i have something on my face” you pouted slightly running a hand through your hair. “no, just surprised” you pursed your lips as if waiting for him to say more, you stood up and grabbed the bag full of your belongings you mumbled a “thanks”.

“what was that smokey?” he smirked, a nickname, really. you rolled your eyes at his remark “you should be thanking me as well, without me you would’ve been cornered” he nodded a little at your words “hm well, what’re you doing out here”.

“ran away” you said quickly as you stared at the missed calls on your phone screen. “i need to get away from here” you added as he watched your every move as if trying to decipher you.

“well, you wanna go to hosu?” you looked up at him in disbelief, “what’s in it for you”, he looked conflicted you weren't great at reading people, its not like you had friends or anyone other than your parents around growing up. 

“might change my mind” he grinned before motioning you to follow him, you cautiously followed his steps along the rooftop. “wait i don’t even know your name”. he turned around for a split second before jumping onto another roof, you did the same, “what’s yours”.

“y/n mido- just y/n” if you were really going to leave this world behind then this is where to start, leaving behind your fathers name.

“names dabi, why did you run away” he’s intriguing, besides you needed to get as far away as possible and he’s willing to help so telling him this isn't exactly a danger to you.

“my dads a dick, he’s trying to train me to become the greatest hero but if this is what it takes to have the fucking honor of being called a hero then i don’t want it. i don’t want to be controlled my whole life, or live a life i don’t want”.

“huh, sounds familiar” he joked leading you out of the alleys closer to the lit up streets of the city. you smiled at his joke before jumping down the building as he did using smoke to soften your fall again, he zipped the trench coat up around his mouth and let the hood cover his hair, his piercing blue eyes and nose were the only facial features visible, you laughed slightly at the sight making him roll is eyes at you.

you moved to peak around the corner of the alley, dabi stuck out a protective arm before peaking out as you tried to do a couple seconds before. he let his arm fall to his side again before motioning you to join him, you walked beside him. 

the large lights and billboards made your eyes go wide, “what you never seen the city at night before?” he joked watching your expression stay the same, you looked like a child seeing fireworks for the first time, it was endearing yet sad. had you really been isolated like this, never even seeing something as simple as lights in the darkness.

“i told you, my dad trained me most of my life, so I've never had the luxury of seeing this, never mind at night.”

he hummed at your words as he turned another corner grabbing your arm and dragging you in at the last second making you yelp, a couple motorbikes and cars stood in a line along the small street. the man eyed each of the bikes, you watched as he grabbed a key from a pocket in his oversized trench coat and placed it into a black and blue motorbike before throwing a leg over the seat and turning a head to you. “you coming or not?”.

you grinned before jumping up into the seat.

the world blurred past you, lights buildings and people became one, it really was beautiful, your wide eyes tried to catch everything as you sped past. “where are we going!” you yelled over the noises of traffic and people. “1 day in the city, then hosu city”.

you had never felt more alive, of course you were taking a risk going somewhere you didn't know with a stranger but this was better than being trapped in a house you couldn't call home. 

you gripped his waist as he sped up slightly, he probably didn't how much you hadn't seen, or how much you'd been cut off from the world you thought, in reality he knew more than anyone.

he was busy in thought as you sped past the lit buildings, he watched in the small metal mirror at your expression.

she’s the type to fall in love with everything unreachable, just like i once did.

maybe this was a bad idea, i could’ve just told them i lost her.

the sun started rising a little after you left for the centre of the city, the sunrise you knew all too well rose, sleepless nights led to you watching the sunrise on the rooftop of your house. it was lonely, being alone wasn't something you thought about often. people are disappointing is what you had been taught through experience but however much you wanted to be okay with loneliness you knew you’d find someone to change that, a friend.

“aye you still awake?”,

“mhm”, he grunted in return as you asked him about how much he’d seen of the city, the conversation went onto talk of your family. 

“my mother, she was so in love with the idea of my dad that she kind of just ignored how he treated me, they were good parents at some point, but somewhere along the line that changed”

the day was the most fun you had ever had and much to his disgust you went shopping, you were taking a while “fucking hell, yeah that’s fine”, you frowned at his tone before grinning “hm ill find something better”.

“No, no that is good, yeah its great stick with that”, you laughed at his annoyance before going to pay, “i’ll pay” you shook your head a little grabbing the card you put your fathers money on. 

he rolled his eyes before shoving his own card in the machine and punching in a couple numbers, you thanked him and took the bags resting them on your arms. 

the day went by faster than you liked, you soon found yourself heading towards the motorbike, the black haired man followed next to you eyeing your every move.

she’s going to hate me.

you followed the road out of the city towards another, the lights slowly becoming only dim streetlights. the bright yellow lights of the city were far behind you but even within the peace something was off, you could feel the tension between you and the male, even if you were to ask its not as if he’s going to tell someone he’s known for a little over a day.

“where are we staying in hosu?” you tried to fill the tension with small talk, the man sped up a little before answering “with a couple uh friends, they’re weird”. you nodded as if he could see you, just as you were about to ask him about his ‘friends’ you felt a drop of water hit your cheek.

as the rain slowly got heavier you giggled feeling the drops slide down your face, “what’s so funny smokey” he turned slightly to look at you, you blinked the rain out of your eyes to look at him not expecting to see his bright cerulean eyes looking straight into yours, your breath hitched slightly but you didn't look away, his eyes averted back to the road again and you let out of a breath you didn't know you were holding.

he found himself somehow jealous of the fact that the rain got to touch you, your eyes lit up as you watched the lightning flash across the night sky.

he huffed in anger at himself for even feeling these things, whatever, shes gonna hate me after this anyway.

with only an hour left for hosu you felt yourself getting tired and you grabbed a monster from your bag, you opened the can shuddering a little at the cold you chugged most of the acidic down your throat before hearing the boy in front of you elbow your knee, his hand was held out for the drink, you rolled your eyes pouting slightly and handed him the drink, the rest of the sugary drink drained down his throat. 

something about him intrigued him, maybe it was his mysterious nature, mystery had always drawn you in, it was fun figuring out mysteries and conspiracies, so why is he so difficult to figure out. his eyes were the most mysterious to you, his bright ocean filled eyes. they held so many stories, so many emotions you couldn't decipher.

“hey i asked you a question” you shook away your thoughts and asked dabi to repeat it he sighed shaking his head before smirking for a split second, “i asked how much you hate villains”, you furrowed your eyebrows at his question.

“i don’t hate villains.” you said simply he looked back at you as if asking you to carry on.

“its unfair how quick people are to decide the difference between heroes and villains, most heroes aren’t even good people, they're just fakes hiding behind the mask that is saving people, you hurt people in secret your whole life and then save a couple people and you’re suddenly a hero?, i don’t hate villains, i hate people who think get can choose who’s a hero and who’s a villain just from their appearance”.

he thought for a couple minutes before his lips curled into a small smile, she really gets it huh.

“i’m not stupid, i know you’re deemed a villain dabi, but you don’t seem one to me”, his smile softened a little as if you said the most meaningful words to exist, he felt his walls slowly breaking for you, worst part is he let it happen.

he turned one final corner before parking outside what looked like an abandoned warehouse, you hopped off the bike and followed the man to the door he sighed slightly, he let you go in front of him, you stopped at the door and turned around to look at him questioning his sigh.

he inched closer to you as your back pressed against the door, your eyes widened as his former comforting smile turned into a sad smile, as if he wished this could last.

your breath hitched as his face got closer, he grinned for a second his nose brushing against your own, just as you thought he was going to kiss you he pulled back slightly and lifted his hand which was clenched as if he was holding something, his hand stopped level to his mouth, he opened it and blew the powder into your face making you immediately collapse.

you didn’t expect him to save you anyway.

A/N : damn so part2? DJSF

FUN FACT : manga spoiler : when he said “ she’s the type to fall in love with everything unreachable, just like i once did.” he was talking about his desire to become the greatest hero with his quirk but because of his body is was unreachable.

taglist : @todoroki-shoto-is-life @blazedbakugou @luluwiie @blue-gold-demigod-clouds @gazelle-des-pres

[xxkellsvixen19xx]

Spotlight: A Life Of A Troubled Celebrity Heartthrob Ch 9

Spotlight: A Life Of A Troubled Celebrity Heartthrob Chapter 9

Word Count: 3,432

We're going to skip the formalities Ashleigh," Colson strolled into the study and pushed Ashleigh's chair back, "Why did you you do it??"

"Colson I-" Ashleigh looked at him, frightened, "Slim said if I didn't do it then-it would have been me instead," she hung her head in shame.

"Hmm.." Colson held his chin and pretended to be in deep thought, "so you gave up Y/N instead..makes sense I guess," he shrugged.

"What?!" her head snapped up.

"Slim is a crackhead and is blazed half the time..what's your excuse for taking part in this Ashleigh," his eyes were fire and ice all at once.

"He threatened me-" she cried out.

"But you made conscious decision to help him f*ck my wife didn't you?!" Colson shot back, "you even spiked her drink with a double dose of the drug!" He shouted, "why did you do that? Huh?!"

"I was scared!" she said as the tears pooled her eyes,

"Ahhh..I see.." Colson stood up, " are you scared Ash?" Colson got up stared directly into her eyes.

"Y-e-ss.." she gulped and looked at the bodyguards that towered behind Colson.

"Good," Colson said with satisfaction, "it's good that you're afraid," he paced around her chair, "At least I've got the decency to plan this thing in front of you; and not behind your back like what you did to someone that considered you a friend," he stopped in front of her, "Now I'm going to get one of these guys to lock you in a tiny bathroom and have his way with you? How about that? Sound familiar?"

"Don't! Please! I'll do anything!" she fell at Colson's feet and grovelled.

"Guys can I have a volunteer to take this lovely lady into the restroom and do what ever you feel like with her? Actually I want you to go as far as Slim did with my wife..or further maybe? Rog? Andre? You're game?" Colson asked.

"Let me at her Col. I think I will do a good job than Rog over here," Andre motioned with his head.

"No, no, no. Please allow me Col? I will do a better job than Slim," Rog said smugly.

"Okay Rog you're our guy!" Colson patted Rog on the back, "don't worry Ashleigh I'll just turn a blind eye like you did and I hope, for your sake, there's someone that cares enough to come and knock the door down-like I did," Colson stepped away from her, "Hey don't forget to rough her up and spike her drink before-just like Slim did to my wife."

"Waaiiitt! Don't leave me! I'm sorry! Please! Slim made me do it-he-he threatened me," Ashleigh wailed.

"Why didn't you come to me?! You had a choice and you did the wrong thing Ashleigh! That makes you as bad as Slim!" Colson yelled at her, his blue eyes blazing. "By the way-enjoy your stay in prison," he informed her before he left the room.

"Take her away Rog and don't come out until she passes out just like Y/N," Jax looked down at her with disgust.

"Jax! Please don't do this!" she pleaded but Jax was having none of it.

"You saw it fit to do it to Y/N so why should I feel sorry for you? Take her away," Jax said.

"Noooo! Please!" Ashleigh screamed as Rog threw her over his shoulder; to carry out orders.

"How far do you want to take this Colson?" Jax asked as they walked to the car.

"As far as Slim took liberties on my wife," Colson replied tersely, "I want her to experience everything that Y/N went through. She should have a play by play version and we'll see how she feels being in the same shoes."

"So they're not going to actually...?" Jax raised his eyebrow.

"No! I gave them strict instructions not to take it that far," he reiterated.

"Okay," Jax opened the door for Colson and he jumped in.

"Please take me to the hospital? I need to check on Y/N before I lose my mind," Colson sighed heavily, "the doctor has assured me that he didn't..get very far."

"What a relief!" Jax sagged on the driver's seat.

"If he had-I was going to kill him with my bare hands," Colson clenched his fist.

"Not if I got to him first-with a bullet straight through his head," Jax said with conviction.

"I think we need to leave this place. Just me and Y/N," Colson said, "please make the arrangements?"

"Where are we going to this time?" Jax questioned, knowing he was part of the plan.

"Jamaica," Colson replied.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Good morning baby," Colson sat on the hospital bed and held Y/N's hand. Her eyes fluttered open and she groaned.

"You told him," she snatched her hand out of his grasp and turned aside.

"What?!" Colson asked, confused.

"I told you something in confidence," she cleared her throat, "and you told Slim so he could use it against me," she sniffled.

"Sweets.." Colson jumped onto the bed and lay in front of her, "look at me? Please?" he held her face tenderly.

"I honestly have no idea what you're going on about" his blonde hair flopped over his eyes and he tossed it back, "can you at least fill in the blanks so that we can be on the same page?" he stared at her intently.

"He knew," she whispered, "he knew about Bobby," she dropped her gaze.

"Who's Bobby baby?" Colson asked gently.

"My ex," she gulped as she twisted her hands nervously.

"I didn't tell him anything about it sweets. I swear. Maybe he overheard me talking to Jax the other day..I wanted him to help find him so you wouldn't have to worry about him coming back-I didn't want it hanging over your head," Colson explained "plus you never really told me his name.."

"Oh," her eyes focused on chest.

"You like my t-shirt?" Colson joked.

"I've always found plain white t-shirts fascinating," she rolled her eyes.

"This isn't just any white t-shirt babe-it's an original Levi," Colson held out the hem of the t-shirt and grinned.

"I'm sorry for spoiling your night," Y/N apologized.

"Hey..don't do that," Colson held her chin up and gazed into her e/c orbs, "I should be the one apologizing actually. I was supposed to protect you but-"

"Can we not talk about this?" she frowned and looked away.

"Sure," there was an awkward silence. "I'll go and check with the doctor if he's done with your discharge papers," Colson hopped of the bed and left the room.

Y/N looked up the ceiling and sighed heavily. How did she end up in this situation for a second time? If Colson hadn't kicked down the door when he did then-she didn't even want to think about it. She would rather keep it buried in her emotional archives.

"Good morning!" Jax stood at the door with his hands in his pockets, "is there room for one more?" he smiled.

"Jax!" Y/N gave him a genuine smile, "come in!" Jax got to her in two strides and engulfed her in a bear hug.

"You okay kid?" he leaned back and examined her.

"Yeah," she grinned.

"Good. The doctor has given you the green light, you can go home" he nodded with satisfaction, "did your husband tell you that we're going on honeymoon?"

"No Jax," Colson cut in, "but you might as well tell her."

"Tell me what?" Y/N asked.

"We're going to the Caribbean baby," Jax smiled.

"What?! Really babe??" Y/N gushed and Colson nodded with a smile.

"Let's get out of here I need to pack."

***********************************

It was a beautiful day; the birds were singing, the sun was shining and all was alright in the world. For now at least.

Colson woke up early and went to take his usual swim. The beach was deserted as he walked towards the water, in his shorts and his towel slung over his shoulder. He loved to take an early morning swim as part of his workout routine because it helped him to think; and he had a lot of thinking to do this morning.

At the end of this week they were going back to reality and he wasn't sure if he was ready for that. The press that constantly stalked him and pried into his private life unashamedly, his fake friends, the pressure of staying at the top and last but not least his dear mother in law. Mrs Y/M/F/N L/N had called him, breathing fire and threatening to castrate him as soon as his jet touched the ground of Cleveland. He would definitely chose dealing with the press over that any day.

While he understood that she had genuine concerns, Y/N was a grown woman and the only thing that mattered to him. The way he felt about her frightened him. After Dani he had promised to never fall in love again. Love was complicated, it was too intense and it made you vulnerable; but worst of all you could risk getting your heart broken. He had loved Dani more than was humanely possible-he could have done anything for her and he did, but after she slept with his best friend she did irreparable damage to his heart. He couldn't risk it again-and yet he found himself totally consumed by Y/N Y/L/N.

Her eyes captivated him and sent his heart spiraling to the ends of the unknown. When she laughed or smiled at him he felt like he could take on the world. Making love to her was an indescribable feeling..he couldn't put it into words even if he tried. She was always on his mind and he just wanted to be with her all the time. He was selfish when it came to her-he didn't want anyone else around when they were together; he wanted all her attention; all of her.

Colson swam back to the shore, his body was exhausted. He bent over and held onto his knees, trying to catch his breath.

"Smile," Y/N said and as he looked up startled she took a pic with her iPhone.

"Hey sweets," his face broke into a smile and his heart skipped a beat.

"I could wake up to this every morning..some girls have all the luck," she sighed and took a few more pics of Colson in his swimming trunks, water dripping from his gorgeous body.

"You know what Bambi..I think you need to be in the pic as well-"Colson lunged at her and grabbed her, making her wet. She was dressed in a short floral caftan dress which did nothing to protect her.

"Baker!" she squealed, "you're making me wet!"

"Just what I love to hear sweets," he crushed her against his solid chest and their lips merged, melting into each other. He wove his fingers into her silky soft hair and she in turn slid her fingers into his wet hair.

Jax stood behind them clearing his throat and got their attention.

"Just on time Jax-please take a video and post it on Instagram asap okay?" Colson handed the phone to him.

"A video??," Y/N asked. Before she got a response Colson swooped her off her feet and threw over his shoulder. He ran back into the water amidst Y/N's screams and protests.

She landed in the water with a splash and Colson laughed at her as she spluttered in the water.

"Baker you are dead!!" she jumped onto his back and they both keeled over back into the water. Y/N tried to escape but he caught her foot and dragged her back in. They continued a full out make out session and would have taken it further if Jax hadn't reminded them that they were in a public area.

"That's enough you two!" Jax yelled, "breakfast is served, let's go."

"Let's get changed first. Come one," Colson put his arm around her shoulder as they walked back to the villa. They had a quick shower and dressed up before going for breakfast.

"Can't we go out somewhere for breakfast?" Y/N suggested, "We're in the Caribbean so we might as well take advantage of it."

"As mi 'lady wishes," Colson bowed.

"Baker!" Y/N swatted his arm.

"But I went all out and made breakfast for you two?" Jax grumbled.

"Sorry Jax. Guess we will have to stay and eat," Y/N said.

"Killjoy," Colson muttered under his breath.

"Don't worry babe, we can explore after breakfast," Y/N squeezed his arm.

"Ooh, I like the sound of that.." Colson murmured and leaned in to kiss her.

"Can we eat now?" Jax complained.

"I would rather eat what I'm looking at right now.." Colson continued to suck on Y/N's lips and she giggled.

"Gosh! I think I'm going to throw up," Jax rolled his eyes, "I'm going to eat at my villa. I'll leave you kids to it." He threw his napkin on the table and stood up.

"Hey Jax," Colson said, "You're officially off duty. We'll call you when we need you."

"Thank you!" Jax said with a sigh of relief, "at least I won't have to witness you two sucking face any longer."

"Makes two of us," Colson replied. They laughed as they watched him leave.

"You're not a nice person Baker," Y/N said as she nibbled on a piece of bacon.

"I know but I'm still yours," he tucked a lose strand of hair behind her ear.

"Are you really?" she asked with uncertainty.

"Sweets-let's not do this? Please?" he raked his hair.

"So nothing has changed," she nodded and her gaze as she twisted her fingers nervously.

"I'm going for a walk!" Colson pushed back his chair and it screeched as he stood up.

"Fine!" Y/N shouted at his retreating back.

Y/N thought that things had changed. That somehow his feelings had changed and he was finally ready to admit that he loved her, that this was more than a casual fling, that they had passed the stage of testing the waters. She had hoped they had established their relationship on a solid foundation but his outburst had proved that they were still on ground zero.

Two steps forward. Two steps back.

**********************************

Y/N spent the day watching Netflix in the guest room at the villa. She had ordered room service because she didn't feel like cooking. She didn't feel like doing anything but wallowing in self-pity. Colson hadn't shown up for lunch or dinner and Y/N went into further depression. There was a fully stocked bar so she decided to take full advantage of it and drowned her sorrows.

She heard loud music coming from outside so she got dressed in her best outfit and headed out. There was no way she was going to sit at home while Colson was probably out there having a good time. She stumbled into a local club that seemed to be happening tonight and made a beeline to the bar.

"Can I have a cosmo?" she asked the barman and he nodded. She sipped on it slowly and watched the revelers grinding on each other; having a good time.

"Care to dance?" Colson came from behind and whispered in her ear.

"Get lost Baker," she retorted without swinging around.

"Look sweets, I'm sorry for walking out on you," he turned her around and he took her hands, "I shouldn't have done that-please forgive me?" he pouted.

"We can't make progress if that's what you going to do every time we have a fight," she said, "where have you been all day anyway?"

"I went scuba diving and surfing with Jax," he replied. "Can we just be Colson and Y/N tonight? For the rest of the week maybe?" he caressed her cheek with the back of his hand, "No fighting, no arguing-no nothing-good vibes only. Just me and you enjoying each other's company? Can we do that baby?" he implored.

"Okay Baker. I'm sold," Y/N rolled her eyes and picked up her drink.

"I know we need to do grown up talk soon but can it be when we get back home?" he asked, "for now I just want to enjoy my honeymoon with my beautiful and sexy wife," he took her drink and gulped half of it down.

"Hey! Get your own," she slapped his arm. He ordered another round for them and then a couple of more. She was feeling light headed and her face was tingling. The alcohol had clearly kicked in and she could feel it.

"Let's go dance!" Colson pulled her to the dance floor.

"I don't even know how to dance to this music!" she shouted into his ear. She looked around her and all she could see was people gyrating on each other. If they didn't have any clothes on it would have been x-rated.

"There's nothing to it sweets. Just follow my lead," Colson started grinding against her and she followed suit.

They got lost in the moment as their bodies intertwined as they moved to the rhythm of the music. He turned her around and fitted her back into the contour of his body, his hands slowly gliding down her thighs. She weaved her hands in his hair and pressed her backside into him and he groaned into her ear.

"You're killing me Bambi," his lust filled voice whispered into her ear, sending chills down her spine. He gripped her hips tightly and sucked her earlobe and she gasped.

"I learnt from the best," she said breathlessly, as she continued to grind against him.

"Bathroom-now!" he growled.

"What?!" her eyeballs almost popped out. This was so hot but she had to be the voice of reason here. He grabbed her hand and led her to the ladies restrooms, "Colson-you can't be serious?!

"This is Jamaica sweets. We can't come here and not have hot, spontaneous sex in the bathroom," he slammed the door shut and made sure it was locked.

"What if we get caught?" she asked breathlessly, as he planted hot kisses on her neck.

"Too bad-they will just have to hear you screaming my name," he said in a husky voice, before he pushed her against the door and took her right there and then.

Welcome to Jamaica.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The rest of the night was a blur and just when Y/N thought she was ready to head home, Colson told her the night was only beginning.

"We've been invited to an after party at Sean Paul's and I have been trying forever to get a collabo with him. This is my chance," Colson said as they jumped into the limo.

"Can you maybe drop me off at home? I'm totally wasted," Y/N groaned and leaned back on the leather seat.

"Not a chance sweets," Colson leaned in and kissed her until she was breathless, "better?" he asked with a smile.

"Hmmm," was all Y/N could day.

"We won't stay long. Promise," he assured her but they both knew it was a lie.

Colson kept her entertained throughout the night and never left her side. They danced, talked, drank and danced some more. Finally she couldn't stand on her feet any more so they went to sit down again. The people at their table were smoking a joint an passing it around and Colson pulled on it a couple of times before passing it to Y/N.

"No way!" she pushed his hand away.

"Don't tell me you've never smoked weed sweets?" he looked genuinely shocked.

"Never..not interested," she slurred, "I don't smoke."

"This is different. Besides-we're in Jamaica sweets. You can't be here and not experience this," he looked at the joint like it was gold, "come on just try it. Just one drag," he coaxed and his new found friends cheered her on.

"Okay, okay" she relented. Against her better judgement she took it and smoked it until she choked on the smoke.

"Yeah!" everyone cheered for her.

"Well done Bambi," Colson chuckled and rubbed her back.

To this day Y/N couldn't remember how she got home that night.

Colson teased her about it the next day. Apparently she danced on the table and almost did a strip show but he had stopped her just in time. He even got a lap dance.

"You're a bad influence Baker," she groaned and went back to sleep.

[imaginejamesandsirius]

Could you write a soulmate au where James's soulmark could fit Lily or Sirius and he just always assumed it meant Lily so they're in a relationship even though neither of them really feel it. And then he gets to know Sirius better (maybe he's in Slytherin or they're at uni or something) and he realises that sirius is his soulmate so him and Lily break up and James and sirius live happily even after and so does Lily (with remus or marlene maybe?). Sorry, that's probably really weird and specific.

Sirius wanted to rub at his soulmark, but he knew better than to have a tell like that. So he glared at nothing in particular and let everyone else think what they will. An entire of summer of being isolated enough to touch it when it was unsettled had let him get comfortable, and now he was back at school. With a soulmate that had rejected him at the end of the last term. Oh yeah. It was going to be a great year.

“People are going to think you’re plotting their mass murder if you keep looking that way,” Regulus said beside him. Sirius glanced at him, but he already had his gaze back on his book. “What’s got you in a sour mood anyway?”

“Nothing,” he lied.

It was Regulus though, so he knew better and just scoffed lightly.

“What are you reading that for? I know it’s not a class.”

“Oh?” Regulus said, and tried to hide the content of his book without making it obvious that that’s what he was doing. “And since when did you pay enough attention to your classes to make that kind of judgement?”

Sirius rolled his eyes and grabbed the book before Regulus could sneak it all the way into his bag. He raised an eyebrow slightly and gave Reg a look. “Werewolves?” He checked the author. A blood purist arsehole, no surprise, probably spouting fear-mongering bullshit. “You aren’t going to learn anything from this bastard.”

“I know,” Regulus said, snatching the book back and pretending that there wasn’t a blush crossing his cheeks. “It was the only one the library had.”

“The only way you’re going to learn shite about a werewolf is to ask one.”

“Well that would defeat the purpose wouldn’t it.”

“Reg…”

“Shove off,” he grumbled, but it was obviously from embarrassment rather than anger.

“We have a resident werewolf,” he said leadingly, watching with perverse glee as Regulus’s shoulders started to hunch, “who just so happens to be unbonded. Now, the only reason I can think of ickle little Reggie to be interested in werewolves is if he has some sort of clue to--”

Reg slapped a hand over his mouth and glared. He glanced around nervously even though he knew just as well as Sirius that no one could hear them because of the silencing spell they’d put up when they sat. “Fine, okay? I think it might be him.” Slowly, he took his hand, as if daring Sirius to say something stupid so he could cover his mouth again.

“I don’t think reading that book is going to win you any points with him.”

Regulus sighed, turning back to his mostly empty plate. “I wanted to be certain.”

“Are you sure it’s him?”

“Pretty sure. What are the chances I’m going to meet a different werewolf that could be my soulmate?”

Sirius didn’t say anything. Unless Regulus moved to a different country, it was practically guaranteed that his soulmate was Lupin. Well, one of them. “It’s only one of them, right?” If it was both, Regulus’s life just became a lot more difficult.

“What?”

“Your soulmates. Only one of them is a werewolf, right?”

Regulus’s face shuttered even though he knew Sirius didn’t mean anything by it. Mother and Father insisted that Reg only had the one soulmate, that somehow the marks were merged to mean one person even though they obviously referred to two separate entities. Similarly, they pretended that Sirius didn’t have a soulmate at all because it was better than believing it was a Potter. “Seems that way.”

“C’mon Reg, cheer up. You know they’re happier with your marks than mine.”

“Barely.”

That was true enough, though they could by no stretch of the imagination be considered ‘happy’ with either of their sons. Sirius shrugged. “Couple more years and you’ll be in the clear.”

“So will you,” Regulus said, looking at him with a slight frown.

“Heir. They want me to be as miserable as both of them are. If Bella’s soulmate doesn’t turn out to be a suitable match, you know they’re going to throw us together.”

“You’ve always talked about running away,” Regulus reminded him.

Sirius gave his brother a flat look. “If I leave, they’ll just drag you into it, and I doubt you’re offering to leave with me.”

Regulus hesitated. “I might.”

“Not with at least one soulmate in arm’s reach you won’t.” Sirius pat him on the back. “But I appreciate the offer.” It’s not like James wanted him anyways. Where would he go?

~~~

Sirius remembered getting his soulmark, looking at the design on his hip with wonder. It was a Great House crest, he knew, but he didn’t know which one. He could ask Father, couldn’t he? He’d be happy with it.

But when he showed Father, his expression darkened, he drank from his glass quickly, the only thing stopping him from drinking directly from the bottle his sense of pride. He grabbed Sirius’s arm harshly, pulling him close so he was in his face. Sirius leaned back as much as he could, disgusted by the smell, but it wasn’t enough.

“You don’t show anyone else this mark, you don’t tell anyone about it,” he ordered. “If someone asks, you don’t have a mark yet. Understood?”

“Yes sir,” Sirius mumbled, stumbling when Father let go of him. He rubbed at his arm for a moment before turning and running from the study.

Mother knew, but only because Father told her. Sirius himself still didn’t know what it meant yet. Two years later, a fancy party he didn’t want to go to, and he found out. The Potter’s were supposed to be blood traitors.

So what did it mean that Sirius had their crest etched into him for the rest of his life?

~~~

Sirius was eleven, finally out of his parents’ clutches, and excited to meet his soulmate. Purebloods talked, and they especially loved to talk about heirs, even the disgraced ones. James Potter, one of only two living Potters (not including Euphemia, who had married into the family) and the only one unbonded, was his age, and would be in his year at Hogwarts.

It was a dream come true the way they fit together, chatting like they’d always known each other. Then again, Sirius thought, they were two halves of one soul, it made sense that they would get on.

…But then James said something about feeling sorry for Sirius because he didn’t have a soulmate, and Sirius’s heart sank. He’d forgotten that that’s what his parents had told everyone, and with James being from a Noble House, he’d ‘know’ about it.

It might have been salvageable-- because it was a lie and his soulmate was right there!-- but James continued on. “I’ve just met my soulmate. The redhead in our year, you know, Evans? She hates me right now, but she’ll fall for me soon,” he said confidently.

Sirius nodded, too numb to do anything else, and that had been that. When he sat on the stool and the Sorting Hat dropped onto his head, he argued with it.

Not Gryffindor.

It’s where James would be put, he was sure. He wouldn’t be able to survive seven years sharing a dorm with him, he just wouldn’t.

So he fought and fought until the Hat finally called out, “Slytherin!” and he didn’t look at James as he walked to the Slytherin table.

~~~

Sirius tried not to stare at Lupin in shock. He succeeded, but it was a near thing. “Not many people have two soulmates,” he said neutrally, offering him a hand up.

He’d already taken it by the time what Sirius had said sunk in, but then he flinched away, choosing to stay sat on the floor. Sirius let his hand fall by his side, then, when Lupin showed no signs of getting up, he sat criss-crossed on the ground in front of him. Sirius wanted to sigh; it’s not like he meant to run into him on the stairs, crashing both of them down. However, since he had, he couldn’t ignore this new information.

“Does Potter know?” There wasn’t any mistaking the strong outline of a lily flower, and even less mistaking the leo constellation it encased, with-- surprise surprise-- the regulus star bigger than the others. Apparently Miss Evans was also a doe, based on Regulus’s second soulmark. Sirius needed to focus on Reg, that was the more immediate situation on hand.

Lupin glared at him. “You’re not going to tell him.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow, wondering if he could get away with telling Lupin that, as Potter’s soulmate, it was technically his right to inform him that his girlfriend had a soulmate that wasn’t him. Of course then he would have to admit that he’s known all along that James Potter was his soulmate, and that was not a pile of hippogriff shit that he wanted to deal with right now. Or ever. Instead, he asked, “Does Regulus? I don’t know why I’m asking, really, he obviously doesn’t know. If he did, you three would already be together. Rather determined, little Reggie.”

Lupin-- hell Sirius should probably start calling him Remus since he was his brother’s soulmate-- didn’t let his expression waver, but a flash of something went through his eyes. Hope, maybe?

“I wonder if his other soulmate is Lily too,” Sirius mused, purely for Remus’s benefit since Sirius didn’t believe Reg would have two soulmates that weren’t involved with each other. Regulus wasn’t going to take that first leap, unless someone nudged Remus he wouldn’t either, and like hell would he talk to Evans about this even if she was the one most likely to do something with the information. “He’d be happy to hear that, I think.”

Remus snorted. “Happy that he has a muggleborn and a- someone like me for a soulmate?” The stumble in his words reminded Sirius that Remus didn’t actually know they were aware he was a werewolf. Sirius thought for a moment about telling him, but that wouldn’t go well, and besides it wasn’t his problem. “Yeah, I’m sure he’ll be thrilled.”

“Have you ever talked to my brother?” Sirius asked pointedly. “He’s not full of as much blood purist shite as you seem to think.”

“And you?” Remus challenged, but he sounded more curious than accusatory, so that was something. It’s not like they’d fought in all their years at Hogwarts, preferring to simply not talk.

“Until my beloved parents are with the Black ancestors of generations past, the official party line is that I am.” Sirius shrugged with a helpless ‘what can you do’ air.

“And you’re telling me all this why?” he asked suspiciously.

Sirius stared at him flatly before saying, “You’re my brother’s soulmate.” Sirius got to his feet and dust off imaginary dirt from his robes. “Regardless, if you don’t tell him by tonight, I will.” He didn’t wait for a reply before he started walking away. He’d probably tell Evans tomorrow unless Reg could give a good excuse for why he shouldn’t. Even if he did, Sirius might tell her. He was selfish, and honest enough to admit it, if only to himself.

“Wait!”

Sirius paused, half-turning so he could see Remus, who had finally stood up.

He looked around, checking that no one had entered the corridor. “Does he know? About Lily?”

“Not yet. He had his suspicions about you,” Sirius added. See? He was a good person, helping other people find their soulmates even though he’d already said all this, if not in so many words. His previous good mood was rapidly turning to shite. He was happy for Reg-- really-- but that didn’t mean he wanted to be in the thick of things.

“And if I don’t tell him, you will. About both me and Lily.”

“Yep.” Sirius couldn’t deny that Evans having a confirmed soulmate in Remus and Regulus didn’t make him happy for the specific reason of breaking her and James up, but he would have told Regulus about her even if it didn’t benefit him. Knowing that didn’t lessen his building self-hatred.

“If he knows, he’ll tell Lily.”

“Probably,” Sirius lied. Regulus was many things, but brave in his personal life was not one of them. If Remus refused to tell Evans, Sirius would so Reg wouldn’t have to-- he wasn’t about to let his little brother suffer when he didn’t have to. He also didn’t know Remus well enough to trust that he’d take one for Reg. Soulmates or not, they didn’t know each other yet.

Remus chewed on his lip for a minute, before coming to a decision. “Do you know where he is right now?”

“Common room.” Unless he’d randomly decided to ditch his homework in favour of a walk like Sirius, which wasn’t likely.

“Will you take me?”

The only surprise Sirius showed was a single, out of place blink. “Sure.”

In the end, Reg was smiling, although he’d banned Sirius from being there for the conversation with the excuse that he wasn’t part of the relationship and therefore wasn’t needed. Sirius sighed dramatically, like that wasn’t the case, but left them alone. He didn’t have a chance to interrogate them about what they decided because Regulus came in the common room, gave Sirius a quick hug and smile, then left again.

Sirius was left staring after him, wanting desperately to ask if they were going to tell Evans. It was stupid, but he wanted Potter to be… unattached. Sirius couldn’t be with him, but he didn’t want anyone else to be either. They were soulmates, they belonged together. But- but they couldn’t be together. Frustrated with himself and his contradictory thoughts, Sirius stalked out of the room and through the castle until he was at the base of the astronomy tower.

Then he was even more upset.

He would come up here sometimes because it gave him a great view to watch the Gryffindor Quidditch practice, but it was far enough away that they wouldn’t see him. He did it more often when he was younger because now that he was older, he was in more classes with James. They actually interacted now, for classwork if nothing else, and there was nothing else. He had asked him out last year, when his heart was pounding just that bit too hard to be ignored, and gotten a confused ‘no’ in response, like James couldn’t understand why Sirius would even think to ask him. He’d tried to get some emotional distance since then, but clearly hadn’t succeeded if his subconscious took him here. He wanted to punch himself-- emotional distance from a soulmate just wasn’t possible.

Sirius sighed in defeat and trudged up the stairs. If he was already here, he might as well go all the way. He sat on the edge, letting his feet dangle as he leaned back on his hands to look at the sky. It was already past ‘getting dark’, but hadn’t quite reached ‘night’ yet. It was a good time of the day, in Sirius’s opinion, but he was biased-- being able to see in the dark because of his animagus form definitely had to do with it, not that he could tell anyone else that.

He was sat on the edge for- Merlin he didn’t even know. Long enough that it had become fully nighttime. Long enough that when he heard footsteps and turned to look, his body protested so completely that he couldn’t turn his head.

“Sirius?” James. Of all the people that could find him right now, James was probably the worst. Of course the only good option was Regulus, but still.

Sirius thought about staying still, playing it off and talking until James left so he could try to get himself to properly move again, but the chances of him needing to leave quickly were high. Slowly, he leaned forward and stretched his arms up. “James.” He groaned when his back popped back into place. He rubbed at his neck, trying to work out the kinks as he stretched his legs out, flexing to get life back into them.

“How long have you been up here?”

Sirius snapped at him before he could process the concern in his voice, “I wasn’t breaking any rules so sod off.” He rolled his shoulders experimentally, face twisting when it sent shocks of pain through his arms. “What are you doing up here anyway?” It’s not like most people came up here by themselves.

James didn’t say anything, but he didn’t leave. He sat on the floor next to Sirius, not bothering to pretend he wasn’t looking at him. “I have it on good authority I’m an oblivious idiot.”

“Congratulations.” He was not in the mood to have a heart to heart. He wanted a soft surface, a warm blanket, an even warmer drink, and some bloody privacy.

“Lily is soulmates with your brother.”

Was he fucking serious right now? He wanted to talk about that? No. No way in hell. On another day, in a different mood, he’d be able to. He loved talking about Reg, he loved talking to James, and he’d be able to ignore James’s love sickness enough to get through a conversation. Right now though, he would literally rather jump in the dungeons with Blast Ended Skrewts. He started to scoot back from the edge, mentally preparing himself to stand. His arse was sore, and he was sure his hips wouldn’t be doing him any favours. Being around James was too much pain on a regular day. When he was feeling this off-center, this vulnerable? Forget about it. He could not deal with this right now.

“And Remus,” James continued, as if Sirius wasn’t actively trying to leave. “Her soulmark was vague enough that I thought it might be me, but apparently Remus’s isn’t.” He shook his head. “I don’t know why he didn’t just tell me.”

“Maybe because you made heart eyes at your girlfriend any chance you got,” he ground out.

“Maybe,” James said, completely unbothered with the way Sirius was climbing to his feet, getting to his own like he was determined to have this conversation with Sirius no matter what. “Why don’t you date?”

“What?” Sirius asked, so thrown by the subject change that he paused in his escape.

“Plenty of birds are dying to get your attention, but you don’t care. Why?”

“I don’t see how that’s any of your business,” he snarled. Gods why couldn’t he be left alone just this once?

James caught Sirius’s wrist before he could leave, but his grip was loose, uncontrolling. “As your soulmate, I think it’s my business,” he said quietly, in a completely un-James way-- Sirius had only ever heard him speak proudly, confidently.

He froze, eyes wide and feeling like he couldn’t breathe.

“I used to think it might be Lily,” he continued, in that same, soft voice, “we both had vague enough marks and if we looked at each other the right way, it almost worked. We never liked each other enough for that to work for long. We were basically broken up when Remus and Regulus talked to her earlier, it just needed to be official.”

Sirius tried to speak, but swallowed several times before he could. “I don’t see what that has to do with me.”

“‘Bright star’. That’s what my mark says.” His thumb gently stroked the skin of Sirius’s wrist. “Do you remember when we first met?” He waited until Sirius nodded to continue. “We fit. But when you got put in Slytherin, I was young and stupid enough to think it meant we couldn’t be. I’ve never felt like that with anyone else. Have you?”

Sirius was trembling but shook his head in affirmation. Everything he’d ever wanted to hear James say, was being said, but… “I have responsibilities. To my family.”

James looked heartbroken when Sirius slipped his arm out of James’s hand.

“And so do you.”

As he walked down the spiralling stairs, his steps piercing and echoing, his chest tightened. In all his years of imagining, he’d never turned James down when he asked. When he pictured it happening, Sirius told his parents to bugger off and he left with James, running away like Reg had mentioned.

Sirius was halfway to the Slytherin dorms, barely keeping himself together by the seams. It wasn’t until he heard noise in the corridor behind him that he realised he couldn’t deal with anyone like this, wouldn’t be able to keep a blank face, let alone pretend he was fine.

“Sirius!” James stopped in front of him, clearly having been running. Sirius wondered if he’d run all the way from the tower. “Last year-- you asked me on a date. Where was family responsibility then?”

Sirius blinked dumbly at him. He remembered? “It was a mistake,” he said slowly, like his body was too busy trying not to cry to accomplish anything else, even so practiced a lie.

“No, me saying no was a mistake. Sirius… give me another chance? Please?”

Unbidden, tears started slipping down his cheeks. “That’s easy for you to say,” he croaked.

James tentatively hugged him, holding him more completely when Sirius folded into him, his head resting  in the crook of James’s neck. “I’ll help you. Whatever you need, whatever I can do, I will. We could be great together. I think I can make you happy, let me try.”

Sirius let out a wet laugh, but it sounded (and felt) more like a sob. “Yeah? And when my parents kick me out?”

“You’ll always be welcome in my House. You and Regulus both.”

“I’m going to hold you to that.”

James kissed the side of his head, and Sirius found himself feeling a little better for it all the while wishing it was more. “You better.”