#they're dictionary definition Idiots In Love

[belisayre]

@escapepodding We are out here, friend, still shipping these two and their ridiculous dynamic (they're idiots in love, your honour)

OMG YES HI HELLO i am so fond of them and have been ever since i first read the books, i’m so glad there are other shippers...!!

[jedi-enthusiast]

Debunking the "The Jedi are Evil" Theory Made by The Film Theorists PT 4

Point 4 - The Jedi are a Cult

(TW: Human Trafficking, SA in regards to Human Trafficking)

Oh boy! We've finally gotten to the point that every single anti-Jedi idiot makes when they claim that the Jedi are evil!

Let's see what exactly Matthew says about it:

"The Jedi Order is a irrevocable cult that lands somewhere between an involuntary boot camp and human trafficking!"

Wow, that's quite a claim! Surely if you're making a claim like that, you've checked to make sure that the Jedi Order fits at least one of those definitions, right?

Let's check!

---

Cult Definition:

"A relatively small group of people having beliefs or practices, especially relating to religion, that are regarded by others as strange or sinister or as imposing excessive control over members." - via Oxford Dictionary, according to Google

The Jedi Order is about a group of 10,000 during the Prequels, so not exactly what I would call small--but sure, I'll give you small, since that's a pretty negligible amount of people in the galaxy.

Their beliefs and practices are rarely seen as a bit odd by people who aren't Jedi and/or haven't ever interacted with the Jedi, but for the most part people just regard their practices as hard to follow--since they practice a lot of self control and emotional regulation (which is healthy)--but ultimately good. Their beliefs definitely aren't regarded as "sinister."

The only people we see that even come close to believing that are the protesters in TCW, but they just think the Jedi are wrong for fighting in the war. It's nothing about their beliefs or practices.

And the Jedi certainly don't exercise "excessive control" over their members.

Many of the members dress differently, we're shown that the Jedi often disagree with each other and interpret their philosophy differently, the Jedi can leave the Order whenever they want, many members of the Order also practice the cultures of their homeworlds, people are literally appointed to the Council for thinking differently because the Jedi want to have differing viewpoints brought up, etc.

They even bend their own fucking rules sometimes to help their fellow Jedi!

Once a female Jedi fell in love and got pregnant and hid it, and Yoda and Dooku literally had a conversation where Yoda said point blank that they would've helped her, if they'd have known about it!

Literally the only things that the Jedi are anal about are:

1. Don't kill or hurt people, except as a last resort.

and 2. don't turn to the Dark Side (and I've already outlined why that's bad).

And even when people do turn to the Dark Side and hurt people, the Jedi fucking help them! They, of course, hold them accountable for their actions, but they try to help them turn back to Light and do better in the future!

---

Welp, they obviously don't fit the definition of a cult. Let's see about the next definition--involuntary boot camp.

Involuntary Definition:

"Done against someone's will; compulsory." - via Google

Boot Camp Definition:

"A place for training soldiers, especially new recruits." - via Google

Considering that parents willingly give up their children to the Jedi Order and then those children--when they grow up--choose to stay, since we've already established that they can leave at any time, I'd say that the Jedi Order definitely isn't involuntary.

And, as I've said before, the Jedi Order is a religious institution--not a militia--and even the work they do for the Republic is primarily diplomatic and peacekeeping ventures. So they're definitely not a boot camp either.

---

Wow, that's two definitions down that the Jedi definitely don't fit!

This next one's quite a serious claim, though, so the Jedi must fit this one--because it'd be pretty tone deaf and shitty to make said claim without it actually being true, right?

Human Trafficking Definition:

"Human trafficking is the trade of humans for the purpose of forced labour, sexual slavery, or commercial sexual exploitation." - via Wikipedia

HOLY SHIT, YOU COULD NOT BE MORE WRONG!

The Jedi do not "trade" their initiates, they do not force them into labor, and they certainly don't sexually exploit them--what the actual fuck is wrong with you to make this claim?

Especially when nothing we're shown is even remotely close to coming near this definition--even in the worst bad-faith reading of SW media.

Wow, so not a single thing that Matthew assigns the Jedi is actually something they fit the definition of. Imagine that.

[ryuto12]

RWBY Headcanon's Maybe Part Thirteen?

I'm still not sure what part it is, but here we go. Literacy headcanon's cause I've seen like five of those so here are my thoughts.

Also no hate for any of these, I have really messy handwriting and despite being forced to learn cursive in elementary have a lot of difficulty with it and it makes my writing almost unreadable.

All of RWBY can read but Ruby is dyslexic. Weiss writes in perfect cursive, Yang and Ruby's is average for kids their age, and Blake has that nine-year-old messy handwriting, but Blake is the only one to know sign language.

JP can read and write fine. NR? Not so much. Ren's handwriting is super messy, and Nora struggles with reading.

Oscar writes super fast so it looks messy, but if he slows down you'd think he was addressing a letter to a king.

CVY are all fine with reading and writing. Fox learned some brail while at Beacon so he'd figure out the correct restroom. Not a lot of learning in Vacuo tho, so he knows only the bare minimum.

Tai was taught to read and write at school, Raven taught herself as a kid, Summer faked her way through Beacon unable to write with minimal reading, and Qrow forced himself to learn after the Teams split so he could go on his own missions. They're all dyslexic.

Ivori is the only member of FNKI who can do cursive. Neon and Kobalt can't read or write but Ivori's a good teacher. Flynt is alright.

May learned to write in super neat cursive but spites her family with messy four-year-old handwriting. Fiona learned as a kid in the mines, but Joanna and Robyn had to get a crash course at the Academy.

Sun can't read or write, but SSN is helping him learn, which he thinks is entirely unessecary for his career choice, but he knows Blake loves to read so it's all for the pretty lady.

Neo can't drop the old habit of writing in beautiful cursive. Roman learned to read from Neo.

Emerald learned to read when she was little before she ended up on the streets and still loves to read. Despises cursive, can't do it.

Mercury was forced by his dad to be ambidextrous with his writing so he'd more "unpredictable", but he couldn't learn much with his dad smacking him over the head and calling him an idiot despite never actually teaching him the letters. To spite the bastard he has Em teach him in return for hand-to-hand lessons after their V6 argument.

Rhodes couldn't read so teaching Cinder was out of the question. Salem taught the young Cinder in a surprisingly quick and efficient way, with a kindness you shouldn't think an immortal witch conquering the world would be capable of.

Watts' cursive could replace the dictionary definition of neat.

Tyrian can't read, but if you ask him how to spell something he pops off with perfect spelling. Physically can't write with how many times he's broken his fingers.

Hazel the kinda guy to start his morning with a cup of warm coffee and a newspaper. Excellent reader, amazing cursive.

Salem has practiced her writing for thousands of years, it's beyond perfect. Knows so many languages, and secretly has been collecting literature for a few hundred years.

Adam didn't like reading, and quite honestly saw it as a waste of time. Couldn't read or write.

Ilia learned cause she wanted to connect better with Blake.

Ozma has the same collection hidden away somewhere, and just as elegant handwriting as Salem.

Goodwitch writes like she's sending a letter to her grandmother, with perfect grammar in the most amazing cursive.

Winter, the highly dyslexic child who didn't get diagnosed until she joined the military. Struggles with spelling, but was forced to seem perfect as a kid, a habit that stays with her even now. Only Penny knows the truth, and it dies with her.

Whitley can write in perfect cursive, he prefers the writing of elegantly turning every letter into a perfectly drawn dick to piss his dad off.

Penny can hypothetically write perfect cursive, but she gets really excited while writing and it ends up so messy. Re-written multiple times before being sent.

Alright this is enough for now, my wrists are starting to hurt. Carpal tunnel go brrrrrrrrr.

[altocat]

Okiokiiki we have the idea of the trio throwing knifes at apples on each others heads, and obviously the iconic fight and general idea of them using the training rooms- what other fun activities do u think the trio got up to while all still friends? (Also if u have any more extremely sad hcs, as i too choose pain and angst today ehhe)

Yusssss

For one on one activities:

-Sephiroth and Genesis enjoy basically any means of petty competition. It's how they flirt show their appreciation for each other's talents. They particularly enjoy a long game of chess on a slow day. Seph typically wins as he has a mind for strategy. But Genesis always makes a big show whenever he gets the upper hand and triumphs.

-Genesis and Angeal are basically drinking buddies. They spend their Saturday evenings boozing it up at some bar or nightclub, more than often reminiscing about Banora. Gen often tries to hook Angeal up with people but it never comes to pass.

-Seph and Angeal share an unspoken love of just strolling through the woods together whenever they're out of Midgar. It's not so much patrol as just quietly enjoying nature. Sometimes they talk. Sometimes they're dead silent. But there is a genuine affection in it. Simply sharing each other's company in peaceful surroundings.

For when they're all together:

-Genesis loves dragging Seph and Angeal to all sorts of risque places in hopes of embarrassing the hell out of them. All in good fun of course. Angeal laughs it off while Sephiroth mostly just sits there steaming and sulking.

-They always use the HQ library at the same time. A trio of idiots stooping over the shelves, probably to look up the dictionary definition of something because Gen wanted to be cheeky.

-They all take their vacations together so BEACH DAYYY YEAH ⛱️ Angeal makes friends with crabs, Sephiroth spends most of the day hiding in the shade, and Genesis nearly drowns four different times.

-Angeal loves cooking so they sometimes go hang in his room to eat. It's a semi potluck. Except Genesis mostly just brings alcohol and Sephiroth brings....napkins (he's trying his best ok).

-Once, Angeal and Genesis both became mutually obsessed with a propaganda video game tie-in for Stamp the dog. This culminated in a month long binge at the company computers that almost completely ruined their friendship. They don't want to talk about it. Don't ask.

-They are frequently required to attend regular social events together so they are always pretty much attached throughout the event. Sephiroth does not like crowds or public speaking so they are basically his guard dogs.

-Honestly they pretty much do everything together. They're always on missions together, eat together, train together, exercise together. They're pretty much linked at the hip 24/7.

So for your sad HC...

After both Genesis and Angeal are gone, Sephiroth often finds himself trying to revisit or recreate their old haunts. Lots of trying to fill the conversation. Lots of pushing himself to explore what they would have said/done here. Lots of filling the void any way that he can.

And sometimes, he just talks to himself in their place. Muttered under his breath, only when he's alone.

It doesn't help.

It's here, in these middle months of complete loneliness and self-imposed isolation, that Sephiroth's sleeping issues begin to worsen, the shape of the red-eyed hallucination drawing closer and closer. And, little by little, he begins to wonder if he may, in fact, be starting to lose his mind...

[cheesebearger]

Gender is a construct and lesbians don't want dick just because the incel goes by she/her. Die mad about it.

what in the everloving fuck brought you to my inbox? thinking i would give even the remotest shit what a random idiot on the internet thinks about anything. i don't think you can even define - on a level more abstract than the dictionary definition - what a construct even is, let alone gender lmfao

also point in fact: i am a lesbian and i love trans women. love them. carnally, even! so like you are just objectively wrong, not everyone thinks the same way as you, and lesbians are plenty capable of engaging with their partners, cis or trans, in whatever erotic, romantic, etc. way they want and it doesnt change the fact they're all lesbians

[il-predestinato]

No because I just want to read a fic where Charles is still in Sauber and obviously Max is in Red Bull, and they're both really protective of each other. This is pre-relationship so it's all pining and everyone except for the other knows that they both luvvv each other.

Charles is going all out to somehow make Max understand that he likes him but, unfortunately for him, Maxy is the oblivious one here.

Then there's Max trying to get Charles's attention but he's wayyy too subtle, so Charlie boy is just confusion central.

And then maybe someone says something bad about Charles but in like German (??) so obviously he doesn't understand. But Max is next to him and goes absolutely feral to protect his sunshine. Then that person starts to talk shit about Max too (in English this time), which then turns Charles's protective switch on for his Maxy-Moo.

Thank you *curtsy*

I am digging the oblivious idiots theme!

Max is playing dumb to get Charles's attention, like he's just ridiculous being like "so how do you say thank you in French?" and it's like HELLO of course he's just finding any excuse to talk to Charles because Dutchie has lived in Monaco since 2015, of course he fucking knows the French word for thank you. Meanwhile Charles is like ooh I am gonna be so helpful to him, and instead of telling him "dude, it's merci and I know you know it" and recognizing the 'subtle' flirting, nope - he buys Max like 3 separate French dictionaries. And Max is like: 😩 why is he mocking me; Charles hates me. While Charles is like: 😭 he hates my gift, I just have to up my game; of course, I should also buy him Bescherelle (verb conjugation dictionary). Max is like: he definitely hates me.

And eek! Love the protective!Lestappen idea. Maxy-Moo (fantastic nickname, btw) is like: "Did you just call him a pancake in Dutch?!! How DARE you? No one is allowed to call Charles a pancake except ME."

(*😘 to you, anon*)

[incarnateirony]

Isn't it cute how we keep finding RL parallels to show that what they're doing with Destiel is a Romance with a capital R, and now the show itself used Destiel as a parallel to show that Saileen is a romance (even tho everyone already knew That)? And they'll come back to eachother eventually? Wow. I hope I got my point across, but this thought hasn't left me since the "What's real?" "This is." convo between Sam and Eileen. Two sister ships are driving this season, and I'm all here for it.

Yeah.

The fandom result is less fun, with people calling text subtext because they simply don’t understand the text’s merit (eg, Last Call) that was settled long before anybody in this fandom considered themselves a genius to try to argue circles around it. Like Y2K called it wants to update fandom on some LGBT issues already settled. Oz was… what? 1997-2003? (Which is when Bobo ended up writing his LGBT rep sociopolitical commentary?)

The show has me ecstatic. The fandom has me reeling in horror in how willfully LGBT people have coded themselves into a performative-to-het-demands-culture that they’ll talk down content and structure used for romantic het pairings even when it’s front and center. 

This isn’t the world of subtextual secret handshakes anymore, guys. I don’t know if meta fandom is reeling on what an actual Will They/Won’t They looks like as opposed to, yes, S7 wallpapers or fish or whatever rando shit got chased as a stream; or even compared to lowkey structural subtext like Colette which hid so many layers beneath the surface that it needed to be actively negotiated and tracked. 

Not front, textual assertions that Dean does in fact have Oz-esque group encounters beyond even Deanmon, that he alone had to bury Cas and burying Eileen was the same for Sam, only to turn around and have them mirror shit and truncate their emotional adventure with a kiss and fandom’s out here footstomping and invalidating the text level bullshit because it’s not said how they want, when they want. 

Like guys that shit is text. People not understanding the text does not make it non-text. Whether or not you know your LGBT history and intersectional issues (or have modernly soaked dialogue from alt right platforms that XYZ isn’t gay if you yell no homo, since there’s even parts of the world where men identify “straight” despite routinely pursuing sex with men and abandoning women that FOR SOME REASON PEOPLE HERE CATER TO THE DIALOGUES OF) – whether you know any of this, whether you UNDERSTAND this – the information still exists. 

People still try to explain that the earth is flat instead of round because they don’t understand science, or evolution for the same reason. That doesn’t mean there’s actually reasonable permissive argument here. In fact, it’s embarrassing as fuck to watch anyone hold one of these arguments. People not understanding material does not invalidate what the material actually means.

And seriously like– “WE WANT–” … what, a love confession or a kiss, I guess. All the other goalposts that were set up were blown by. The former love yous and similar phrasings (I guess we’re herding love affirmations into ONLY three specific words and otherwise it’s not valid, because… Magic Meta Gay People Rules) weren’t enough! And! AND! Even the ones that WERE those three words, people could arGUE!!! It might not be gaY!!!

So let’s be honest bitters & meta fandom & alternate shippers having sixteen jealousy fits: You don’t even want an I Love You, because it would have to be “I love you, and like, only you, romantically, like in love with you, in the gay way, let’s go have gay sex” for this to pacify this utterly homophobic ball of bullshit they have going on.

So we’ll be honest. You want a kiss.

That’s great. I do too.

At the same time, I can gesture you to a literally endless amount of history where literature and TV did not require a kiss for the romantic content to be valid and even celebrated.

That’s not what magically makes all the text text. The text is the text.

The subtext is elements like Reno, and Mary/John, or Amara/Chuck, and even those are loud as FUCK still. Ironically, *the text is quieter than the subtext right now*

If you take the text: Dean has repeat group encounters that are decades-ago LGBT qualified as queer; Dean loses all hope without Cas, once he has to bury Cas, and Eileen does the same for Sam.

The subtext of this: Dean actually forgot an entire woman in his tryst, which means she wasn’t a focus, which makes this gayer than the default gay text; Dean yet again followed viking widower tradition with Cas as a spouse and buried him himself.

This is literally “Cas is Dean’s Collette” but 1. fully textual instead of 3 levels under and 2. much more personal with a full character we witnessed with Eileen rather than flashbacks of Colette for a few seconds. The text here has subtext. It is text. Whether people understand the text, like the LGBT issues around 15.07 or not is an onus on them, but does not invalidate the content. People not understanding Gays doesn’t delete Gays, that isn’t how that works.

Because the hilarity of the line people trying to keep their blogs valid at– that they’re running? All text is subtext unless all text is explained unto a point that it can’t be argued, but that of course leaves the explanation subtext until it, too, is explained beyond a shadow of a doubt to children, and then so on, ad infinity, in a quantum loop of calling everything under god’s written heaven subtext.

I had a conversation with a meta writer who won’t be named that went full bore in a loop. They called it subtext. I pointed out where it was flat surface text. Yes, they said, that IS text, but people can still argue, so that makes it subtext. Uh, no, I pointed out, that isn’t how this works or what those words mean, someone’s understanding of the meaning of text does not invalidate the actual meaning the words have. Arguing with a phantom menace of a GA that’s all catching on right now to contend with tinhatters and a few other oddballs out there that are hilariously small and not in the GA eye isn’t worth changing the entire dictionary. Because The Dictionary Is A Good Book. If someone doesn’t understand all the words in the dictionary and what they mean that, also, does not invalidate the dictionary if it doesn’t have an infinite set of asterisks defining every definition. Anyway, said meta person completely went postal about it after that because after trying to loop the same argument three times and realizing They Will Always End Up Here, off they went when I said that arguing with idiots online wasn’t worth demolishing the dictionary, media study, or queer content.

AV medium seems to be confusing the fuck out of people that fancy themselves or are even degreed lit savants.

But hey, maybe there’s a ruse being played. Maybe Bobo already got that lucky corporate dice roll and is playing into his thematic structure. Maybe he will manage to break through with a kiss. Maybe, maybe, maybe. 

Frankly more than to argue with idiots, I kind of want it to exemplify the gross homophobia going on in this fandom. And I don’t mean antis. I mean every single person, right here and right now, redefining things to maintain their hysteria and anger or even just their general relevance/podium that evaporates if they acknowledge that it is what it is; that every bit of queer text AND subtext they talked down and deleted and tried to wedge into “platonic” boxes due to their own lack of LGBT cultural understanding was real, and valid, and while antis screamed and shouted raging at the text as provided, they were the ones there, being enemies this year, deleting queer content until their arbitrary goalpost, fulfilling as it may be, and as much as I personally want it too, was met. But if that happens, IF that happens, it WILL be by Bobo’s hand or Dabb’s with Bobo’s guidance, and I can PROMISE you he will make it such a sociopolitical commentary on the heteronormative bullshit going on (like his DreamHunter commentary that BLEW BY everyone) that I expect several people to delete their damn accounts in mortal embarrassment.

This season is gorgeous everyone. Enjoy it.

For the record, if that million to one shot is on the table, the episode everyone should watch for results, beyond the finale, is 15.18. I’m not gonna get into all the reasons here beyond Putrefaction/Blackening > Whitening > Yellowing > Reddening = Gold and if anybody wants to know what the fuck I mean by that, send me an ask. (I’m working on a Putrefaction video to plug into my series to help with that. And beyond that pacing, structure, rhythm, and Bobo. But that also does not mean anyone should seriously place their emotional chips on it, just to stop getting cranked up and demanding THIS NEXT EPISODE OR PERISH.)

Because if you think there’s ever a point homophobes are gonna stop arguing shit down, you’re in for a bad time. Straight pairs like Mulder/Scully that kissed got no romos mental gymnasticsing around it. If you expect differently with DeanCas you’re IN FOR A RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDE

But I don’t want to hear one more goddamn peep about representation from that wing of meta fandom. The representation is there, front and center, to relate to for the intended demographic, it just wasn’t what other demographics wanted. But it’s written by a middle aged LGBT man for middle aged LGBT men and if you aren’t in that bracket, and don’t like the results, you don’t get to go and try to destroy that representative material. Hell if you ARE in that demographic you don’t get to one-card steam roll over other LGBT men too, the way it works from there is you find other people in that demographic and discuss the content’s pros and cons. If it ends at “not the ship I like” instead of genuine problems with the content, you also don’t get to destroy that for other people in the demographic. So whether it’s like, desperate clout/platform/relevance clinging, or just complete lack of understanding of LGBT media history and the represented demographic, that shit needs to stop. Pick a side. 

You can’t genuinely fight for representation while going and kicking down rep sandcastles because they weren’t shaped how you want. That isn’t how it works. It works by owning the content, and requesting better or more. Requesting more explicit content does not require destroying the content you don’t consider “enough”, in front of you.

Overt queer subtext AND text remain an overt body within the text even if it does not reach a given explicit landmark that you personally have decided on and is 0% dependent on anyone’s understanding of the fucking content.

[cotton-candy-haze]

HAPPY HOLIDAYS OC ASKS: For Abigail Rogers, what is her relationship like with Peter Parker (aesthetic-wise, plot-wise, interaction-wise, dynamic-wise)

Thank you so much for the asks! I appreciate you so much for all the love you've shown to my OCs. Happy holidays!

Abby and Peter

Aesthetics

These two are young and in love. They're late nights talking on the phone, midnight meet-ups outside each other's windows, stealing cozy blankets from each other. They're crumpled notes in class and a blinking cursor while you think about what to text. They're the twinkling lights of the city, holding hands because it's cold, oversized hoodies and sweatshirts. They're adorable and I love them.

Interactions

When they first meet, they're a little bit awkward around each other. Abby is still getting the hand of this whole "modern-day" thing and Peter has very obviously developed a crush on her after their first several interactions with each other. They're sort of walking around each other, feeling out their relationship to see what is and isn't allowed. Despite that awkwardness, and even before they get into a relationship, they get really close to each other. Abby is the definition of touch starved. If you looked up the term in the dictionary, there would probably be a picture of her face just sitting there. They are constantly touching, whether that be brushing shoulders when they're walking or bumping their legs when they sit together or fixing each other's hair. Basically, they take any excuse for physical contact.

Once they're in a relationship, they're so gross (affectionate) and in love. They're attached at the hip, they look for each other in every crowded room, Abby is literally always wearing one of Peter's sweatshirts. They find comfort in each other and it's extremely obvious. Abby is so shy and easily embarrassed, but that all goes away if she's got Peter in sight. He somehow makes it a lot easier to just exist as herself without any fear of repercussions.

Dynamics

Friends to Lovers, They Share One Brain Cell, Idiots to Lovers, Mutual Pining, Secret Identities

The Plot

There are a lot of twists and turns in their relationship, and it takes a while for them to finally 1) reveal their feelings for each other and 2) act on those feelings. In Civil War, they have an emotional revelation to each other, but then they go back home and pretend it never happened. Peter is scared she didn't really mean it and Abby is scared to ruin their relationship.

In Homecoming, they get into an argument and they don't mend their friendship until the end of the movie. It isn't until a few months after the events of the movie that they actually start dating. Peter asks her out for her birthday, they go on a walk around the city, they kiss on on the Brooklyn Bridge, it's cute.

In Far From Home, she primarily stays out of the way because I didn't want to take the plot away from Peter. They're still dating and they do some cute coupley things here and there, but I try to write her out of the conflict when at all possible. She does go with Peter to Berlin, but Mysterio drugs her and they get separated. They reunite at they end and have a lovely little reunion.

And then in No Way Home they're still dating. I haven't actually figured out what she's doing yet, but I'll work on that eventually.