#this happenened to me today

[queen-of-hawkins-why-ler]

Me when I'm in the car with my family and they bring up Stranger Things, specifically season 4, specifically the Cali plot and I have to act like I'm not completely unhinged and don't run a Byler blog and haven't written like 140 essays on why Mike Wheeler is gay bc my family is part of the "Steve is my favorite character and Will's probably gonna die" crowd so I just have to nod my head in agitated silence when they say "It seems like Mike, Will, and Jonathan were doing nothing all season and I don't understand the point of their scenes" instead of bringing up Jancy parallels and explaining that the Cali plot was a glorified gay romcom building up Mike and Will's relationship because the entire show is a slowburn queer love story

[screaminglygay]

KINKTOBER day 3

pairing: vampire!kate x fem!reader

summary: are you and kate actually meant to be together? you will get the answer at ceremony, where you’ll be surrounded by many other vampires, that are not the friendliest in town.

word count: 4.3k

warnings: light slapping, smut!!!, kinda dom!kate x sub!reader, mentions of blood, some swearing, dirty talk, if anything else I’ll add it

an: i had fun writing kate, she’s so fun and i need her asap:) also i used few sayings from my language and tried to translate it, so if it doesn’t make any sense in english i sincerely apologize haha

an2: also! i was very inspired by this TikTok!

(italics = your thoughts)

!MDNI!

Enjoy this spooky time and be safe!

"Baby! We´re gonna be late and your mother will kill us!" You yell, knowing damn well that the taller dark haired girl heard you.

It was a big family night for you and Kate. You were invited to family gatherings before, but today is different. Tonight you´re meeting her grand grand family members from all around the world. Most of them were against your relationship with a pure blood, but after a few stories they heard about your good impact on Kate, they realized that humans are not so bad after all.

Tonight is a big ceremony of the first humam coming to their family after almost 690 years. The only thing you have to do, to be accepted, is give a little of your blood to your mate, aka Kate. Sounds easy, right?

Well there are three scenarios that might happen. One; she will like your blood, which is the greatest option. The second situation could result in death in front of numerous vampires, and the third and worst possible outcome is that you have cursed blood. It basically means that you two aren't meant to be together, Kate explained to you weeks ago. So after hours, days of googling what blood type is the best for vampires, you actually gave up. Google didn´t give you the answer, shockingly. You just wished you would be Kate´s ideal.

"She can´t kill me, I´m immortal. Remember princess?" At the speed of a light a pair of hands wraps around you. Kate kisses your cheek, hoping it would ease your nerves.

"Oh, I completly forgot! My bad." Rolling your eyes at her wasn´t your brightest idea as a harsh slap on your ass was sent right away. "Ouch!" you yelp.

"Don´t." She spins you around so you two were facing eachtoher. Her cold hands found a way under your dress. Her blue eyes scanned your whole body, holding a little longer on your clevage that your new dress showed.

"Like what you see?" You tease her, already kwowing the answer.

"We don´t have to go there, princess. We can stay right here and-" Kate´s eyes were still on your breasts, until you cut you her off, then she met your eyes.

"Youre forgetting that I´m not immortal, Katie. And I would really appraciate not to fight any vampires today, especially not your mother." You smile at her. "Besides we can have fun later. After all the ceremony and blood testing thing, if everything will be okay and-" you ramble, but this time it´s Kate who jumps right in.

"It´s gonna be okay. I love you and you´re exactly my type." She winks at you, but your nerves are still all around the place. Her hands slips lower, gently touching the insides of your thighs.

"This distraction teqnique would work if our relatioship wouldn´t be on the line, Katie. So leave it for later, okay?" You smiled at her, wishing you could stay here and just enjoy eachother, just as much as she did.

"Fineee" Kate let out a big whine, like a kid when you take them their favorite toy. Which was exctly what´s happenening.

"The sooner we go, the sooner we will be back." You mumble.

"I like this mindset." She chuckled and then both of you went hand in hand outside, where your car with a driver was already waiting.

The car ride was comfotably silent, Kate was holding your hand the whole time, which helped you a little. After 20 minutes you´ve arrived, but you stayed in the car for another 5 minutes. Kate knew you were nervous, she could feel your nerves dancing all around your body, but mostly in your mind. She didn´t said anything, she just gave you a soft smile that made you fall for her the second you saw her. Slowly kissed your lips and then she opened the door for you. You will never get used to her super fast movements.

As always the Bishops made a big event look even bigger. Everything was so expenssive, even the dust looked like it was personaly made for Kate´s mom, Eleanor Bishop, for tonights occasion. As you get closer to the entrance you feel the nerves working again, making your stomach twirl, your hands starts to get shaky. As you approach the entrance, you're greeted by towering iron gate adorned with dark and sinister ornaments. These gates open slowly, revealing a long path leading deeper into the heart of the ceremony.

"Maybe we should get back, you know-" You quickly whisper in Kate´s ear.

"Easy, princess. You´re doing really good. Just hold my hand and I promise, everything will be okay." Kate looks at you with her cute little face. You sigh.

I´m okay, Kate says I´m doing good, so I´m doing good.

As you proceed, you notice the decorations adorning the area. Enormous candles everywhere. The flames seem to dance with a life of their own, casting flickering shadows that play tricks on your senses. It looks so magical, yet terryfying at the same time. The walls are lined with rich, dark wood paneling and huge ornate mirrors. Each table has gold cutlery and is decorated with blood-red and black roses.

Vampires don´t eat, why do they have so many tables set?

Your girlfriend see you look around with confused look on your face, she whispers. "My mom wanted it to look luxorious."

"So she spent a lot of money on... cuttlery and plates?" You chuckle a little.

"Basically, yeah." Kate shrughs and smiles with you.

"I can afford it, it would be a very sad life if after all these years I would be poor, don´t you think, (Y/N)?" As soon as you hear the voice you stop in your tracks, you don´t even dare to turn around, turn around and face Kate´s mother.

"I- I didn´t mean it as a bad thing, Mrs. Bishop." You turn around and notice that she is wearing a striking red dress that cascades to the ground, it´s fabric flowing like liquid silk, decorated with golden stripes.

"I know." Eleanor chuckles. "And to answer your question, it looks better rather than empty hall with just vampires." She looks at you and then Kate. "You two better get ready, you know how Daniella is." With that she leaves.

You turn to Kate and she´s already openning her mouth like she´s reading your mind. "My grandmother. She hates these gatherings. And I don´t blame her, she´s..." Kate stops in her words as she tries to figure out how old is her grandmother, but she just giggles, "... old."

You share a laugh with her as you two go into the backyard, where the ceremony will start.

As you walk through the lavish hallways right outside, you can't shake the feeling of being watched. The stern-faced vampires seem to follow your every move with their eyes. You can hear hushed whispers and the occasional sinister chuckle from hidden corners, making your skin crawl. When you enter the garden, your breath catches in your throat. A group of elegant vampire stands in a circle. Their conversation falls silent as they turn their attention to you, their gaze piercing through your very alive soul. You feel like a deer caught in the headlights, your nervousness intensifying with every passing second.

"Just go sit over there, I´ll come in a second." Kate nods towards the over dacorated throne with big gold crystals all around, as she lets go of your hand. You try to look confident, you try to look as you got this whole situation under control, but you´re still in a room full of vampires.

One of the vampires, a particularly tall vampire with a charming look approaches you. He extends a hand and invites you to sit on the throne. You accept, trying to hide your trembling hands as you sit down. After a few second you stop shifting in your seat as you feel finally seated, as you look up, you see all the vampires looking at you. Of course none of them is blinking so the whole situations is just more terryfing.

In the the crowd of vampires you try to find your partner, Kate. But no matter where you look, you can´t see her, your thoughts start to wonder, once more.

Oh my god.

Eleanor´s voice brought you out of your chaotic thoughts as she´s now standing next to you.

Super speed, of course.

Eleanor starts to speak with a velvet tone that sends shivers down your spine. "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome. The time of bonding two souls has come once again. After almost 690 years, we´re here to reaffirm our eternal bond, to celebrate our power, and to welcome a new member into our family. Tonight, in the power of moonlight, we have a rare guest among us - a human, who has willingly chosen to share in our world. A human, who´s heart is strong enough to beat for two. Let this gathering be a testament to the strength of our coven and the allure of our kind. We welcome you all, and we extend our gratitude to our honored guest. Let the ceremony begins." Eleanor takes few steps away.

Oh god. Now it´s my last second here on this planet. I didn´t write my will! Shit.

As you sit on the throne, a mix of fear and anticipation washes over you, for you have entered a world unlike any other, and tonight, you will be forever changed. The whole garden is incredibly silent, which makes your beating heart even louder.

Two vampire figures step forward, Eleanor fixes your hair and give you a warm smile, as warm as the vampires can do that. The other vampire, you could tell miles away, Kate. Your eyes meet and you both immidietly smile and suddenly, you feel safe. You feel like no matter what´s gonna happen, she is there to protect you. Always.

Eleanor speaks again. "Is everything prepared, my dear?"

"Yes, everything is ready." Kate nods with a small smile.

Your breath quivers as you feel their gaze upon you, you could cut the tension in the air. You don´t dare to look away from Kate, as you know that the rest of the vampires are watching you, like a prey. Even though that´s off the table for a long time now.

"Are you prepared for this, (Y/F/N)? Once this ceremony begins, there is no turning back." The tall vampire that helped you sit down now speaks.

You nod, your voice a shaky whisper: "Yes, I'm ready."

Kate steps closer, her eyes locking onto your neck with a hunger that sends shivers down your spine. Of course she kissed your neck before, so this wasn´t something new, but this time both of you felt that there is something in the air. You noticed her eyes, they were darker, almost like she never had a blue eyes, now they were completly black. She leans in, her lips barely grazing your skin, her voice a sultry mumble.

"Don't be afraid, princess. Let´s pretend it´s just me and you." She takes your hand in hers.

As her fangs descend, your heart races, and you close your eyes, preparing for the worst outcome. But Kate's sharp fangs pierce your tender flesh, a pain overpower your senses. It's an weird sensation, like a burning brand pressed against your skin, and your muscles tense in response. The world seems to blur, and a wave of dizziness washes over you as Kate's bite deepens.

It hurst more than you could ever imagine, but like the waves on the shore it quickly washes away. The pain begins to transform. It morphs into something else entirely, an intense, electrifying sensation that surges through your entire body. You let out a big exhale as you can feel Kate´s touch everywhere, it´s indescribable feeling that is running thorugh your whole body.

Kate has a moment of ecstasy. As your blood rushes into her mouth, it´s adicting in a sense. The taste is inexpressible as well, an intoxicating blend of sweetness and saltiness, and it fills her with an sense of power and pleasure. Every drop that she draws makes her feel more alive than she ever has, and it's as if the very essence of your being is nourishing her soul.

In this shared moment, you and Kate are connected in a way that most of her family didn´t belive. The boundaries of life and death, pain and pleasure were moved once again with your relationship. It's a dance of darkness and desire, you can feel your heartbeat come back to normal as Kate pulls away.

Her eyes are even darker and yours are too. She was right, it was always just the two of you.

The other vampires watch in awe and fascination as Kate and you share this profound moment of bonding, their expressions ranging from curiosity to envy. Most of them though you two weren´t meant to be, or at least they wished it was in that way. At the end you´re still just a human to them.

One of the vampires, closed to where you and Kate were, whispers to another one "Did you see that? It's been ages since I witnessed such a powerful bond."

"Kate truly has a unique way of choosing her companions. This human must be special indeed." The tall vampires whispers back.

The vampires exchange knowing glances, recognizing the significance of this moment. The bond between you and Kate, marks as a rare moment. As they continue to observe, Kate finally pulls away fully, wiping her mouth and then licking the few drops from her fingers as she made eye contact with you.

As both of you had your senses high you two couldn´t deny the fact that you need to be alone, asap!

"Let us welcome you, (Y/N), in our family. Now officially. Let´s raise our glasses to the special bond. To the never dying love!" Eleanor smiles at you and then turns to the vampires, that were holding their own. They all cheered to you and Kate.

You step down from the throne, feeling a sense of acceptance and belonging from the vampires around you. As you begin to walk through the garden, many of them offer congratulations, their voices low and respectful, but you don´t really pay attention as your girlfriend dissapears again.

Then, you spot Kate approaching through the dimly lit garden, her eyes finding yours in an instant. She takes your hand and, with a sense of urgency, starts saying quick goodbyes to the others.

Kate leans closer. "We need some time alone, my princess." She smirks.

"You are reading my mind, Katie." You mumbled.

The other vampires don´t mind you leaving at all, which makes it easier and quicker for you and Kate slip away from the gathering. You follow her, your heart pounding with an excitement, as you make your way back to Kate's apartment, where your journey into the night truly begins.

...

As soon as you step inside her aparment her hands are on you. Her fingers slowly trace over the teeth marks she left on your neck.

"Did it hurt?" She whispers as she kisses your neck.

"Uh- a little" You moan right away.

"A little?" Kate pulls away and raise her eyebrow.

"Okayyy, it hurted a lot. A lot lot, but... after a second-" You were cut off by Kate´s words.

"It felt better than anything in this word." She smiles and you simply just nod. "Go strip on the bed, I´ll be there in a second."

And if Kate means second, it is truly just a second, but this time, she made sure that you have some time to actually take off your clothes, as she wanted tonight to be special.

As you open the door you immidietly start to take off your clothes, fistly your shoes and then your dress, which takes you just few seconds. As you walk past the mirror you notice those cute little bite marks, which sends you pulse right into your pussy. You let out a moan, which makes Kate runs into the bedroom.

"It feels that good, huh?" Kate smirks as she is still wearing her black suit, her hands are behind her back as shes holding a small black velvet box.

"Gosh, I forgot that your ego is big, I didn´t want to boost it more." You playfully roll your eyes.

Kate pushes you on the bed, her hand on your neck. "And I thought I won´t punish you tonight, since you´ve been so brave, princess. Guess you won´t get your present."

"No, wait!" You whine. "Sorry, sorry, I want my present, please." You add.

Kate smiles and kisses you slowly and passionetly, pulling away, while bitting your lip, which makes you wince. She bit little too hard and your lip starts to bleed. She wants to pull away, but being on top doesn´t help her much. You´re under her and the sight of you completly naked, with blood on your mouth is just the most pretiest sight. The kissing is harsh, fast and messy, but none of you really cares.

"I want the present, pretty please." You say between breaths and Kate smiles as she pulls an inch away from you.

"Of course you want the present, sit up for me, please." She moves away from you so you can sit up. You did as you were told and Kate gives you the pretty black box, that of course was decorated by "KB".

Your fingers tremble slightly as you gently lift the lid, revealing what lies inside. Your breath catches in your throat as you behold a stunning collar made of dark, lustrous metal. The collar is adorned with a row of purple crystals. The crystals are deep and regal, like amethysts, and they sparkle with an elegance that takes your breath away. It's a piece that symbols of your newfound connection with Kate.

"Turn around." Kate says as you´re done inspecting the collar.

You turn around. "It´s abolutely beautiful, Katie. I love it, thank you."

Kate smiles at you words, as she puts the collar on you, you flinch at the sudden cold feeling, your nipples perk up. "So responsive." She kissed your neck again. "I´m glad you like it, princess." The vampire whispers in your ear.

Her hands are all over your body as you are pushed on the bed once again. Kate sits on you, pinning you down, "Tonight is about you, my pretty princess. Just lay here and enjoy your night. Will you do that for me?" She made the puppy dog eyes. Those eyes can get out of any trouble and in every bed.

"Yes, Katie." You smile and nod, already feeling impatient you buckle up your hips, earning little slap to your tits.

"Patience." She smirks, knowing she has this effect on you.

"Not todayyy!" You whine.

Kate leans close, kissing you where she bit you earlier, which makes you moan instantly. It is exactly what Kate loves to hear. She moves you higher on the bed and scoop lower, being inches from your already so wet pussy.

"Open your pretty legs for me." You did, very quickly in fact. "Gosh, look at you, so wet already and didn´t even touch you." She makes eye contact with you and smirks. "Did my biting made you that wet? Or me collaring you? Hm?" Kate kisses your inner things as her fingers trails up and down your leg.

"Both." You quietly let out.

"Both." Kate repeats with a smile on her face. "Because you were so good today, I´ll make it easy for you. Look at me, if you stop, I´ll stop. Understood, my pretty princess?" Her fingers were now incredible close to the place you needed them in.

"Yes, understood." You look in her eyes, they were still dark and you knew she was impatient as well as you are.

Her mouth came closer, you could feel her breath, against your skin and after two soft kisses on each of your inner thighs, Kate finally gave in and still very teasingly kissed your clit.

"God-" Your eyes wanted to be closed so bad, but you knew you have to keep them opened.

As Kate smirk agaist you she start to eat you out, very slowly. But after a few of your pretty loud moans, she licks you, like there is no tomorrow. Her tongue was skilled, she knew your body more than you knew it yourself. So after every flinch, every move of your muscle, she knew you are close. So close.

Her fingers are still going up and down your legs, pinching you time to time, to avoid you closing your eyes. "Eyes on me, princess." Kate mumbles into your drenched pussy.

"They... are." You whine as you bite your already bruised lip to keep your eyes open.

Kate just chuckles, which sends immidiet pleasure right into you. Both of you know you´re close, so so so close.

But after a few second you don´t feel anything, no lips, no tongue, no touch. You had to close your eyes, it was just so good, that there was no other way and like Kate promised, she stopped. Completly.

You whine, your hips instantly moved to search for anything. You need something! You eyes open wide, Kate is still between your legs. She´s watching you, and as she did before with your blood, she now wipes her mouth, messy with your juices.

"Hmm so sweet, princess." She licks her fingers.

"Kate, please-" You whine as you move your hips again, your heartbeat matching with you pulsating pussy.

"You knew the rules-" You cut her off.

"I know, but please, it was an accident!" You move yet another inch closer to her.

After a few second of watching you, Kate decided that she will give you another chance. "Close your eyes and you´re not cumming, got it?" Kate crawls on top of you and tug you by your collar. "Got it?" She tilts her head.

"Yes." You nod kissing her as you can feel your taste on her tongue.

"Tasty, right?" You nod again, as she slowly crawls back between your legs, this time she didn´t waste any second and her tongue makes contact with you right away, she was needy too. Her touch starts to be so harsh, no more soft licks or light touches, she needs you to come.

And oh my god, you are close in just a few second of her touch. Kate smirks knowing, she won once again and her ego is going straight to the space, but she will tease you about it later.

"I-" Kate smiles and nods, knowing exactly what you need.

"Tug on your collar, princess. And I´ll say the magic words." She mumbles agaist you as her fingers now entered your hole.

"Fuck- me" You moan loudly, which was like a music to Kate´s ears.

"I am fucking you, princess." Kate smirks, you can´t be bratty now, but hell she would deserve some bratty remark, but you truly need to cum. So you just obediently listen to her and your hand grab on your collar. You did as you were told once again and tug on it harshly.

It makes Kate smile, seeing you like this. Knowing she is the only person that could touch you like this, knowing only she makes you feel this good.

But you knew the same thing too, there is no one on the planet who would ease her thirst as much as you do. No one could do such a good job as you. No one.

"Can-" You open your mouth to talk but you just moan. You don´t have to say anything at all for Kate to understand.

"Go ahead, princess. Cum for me." She mumbles agaist you as her fingers move sligtly faster and her mouth try to lick all of your juices.

Your hand grips Kate´s head as you push her more into you, moving your hips like non compos mentis. "Mine." Your hand grabs her hair as you finally release, coming on her mouth and fingers after such a long time full of stress.

Kate smiles as she licks you. "Yours, princess." After a few second of you bucking your hips up and down, your breathng is steadier and you let go of Kate´s hair.

She kisses her way back up, few kissing on your thighs, her favorite tummy and slowly giving attention to your nipples. As you´re slowly coming down from your hight, you can feel Kate kissing your neck. After a moment or two, Kate comes closer to you, finally kissing your lips.

In that moment, everything fades away, and it's just the two of you, sharing a deep connection that don´t need to be said out loud. The affection in her gaze mirrors the love you feel in your heart, knowing that your love speaks louder than any words ever could.

And you are so happy, that tonights ceremony ended the way it did, because you would rather die, than live in a world, where you can´t have her.

"I didn´t knew you were that possesive, princess." Kate whispers as her eyes scan your face.

"I´m always possiseve over you." You smile.

Kate hums as she kiss your neck again, after few moments of enjoying the feeling, you understood that she wanted to do. "Katie..." You mumble.

"Baby just one more bite, please." She responds, her voice beeing so needy and you can´t deny her.

As Kate sank her teeth in you one more time, both of you knew right away that the rest of the nigh will be a long, and Kate won´t be the only one wide awake tonight.

Thank you for reading!<3

[averagewriter-inthedark]

The Cowboy’s Ice Princess ⛸ | Rhett Abbott Headcanon

Link to my Rhett Abbott Masterlist

Takes place in the year 2021 (I know OR came out in 2022, but they more than likely filmed last year so im using that as the timeline). Also content warnings: light mentions of sporting injuries and misogyny/sexism by the press.

Rhett falling love with a Olympic figure skater would look like:

It all began when Rhett was asked by Cecelia to take Amy to her ice skating lessons. First off, the man didn’t even know his niece was enrolled in them. second, where the hell was he supposed to take her? After gaining the information —which was that Amy’s classmate had their birthday party at the ice rink in the city where she immediately fell in love with skating and begged for lessons—Rhett was giving the address and the two were on their way. “We’re gonna be really early, uncle Rhett,” she said when she saw the time, deep down it excited her-knowing that before her lessons were the training hours of a famous skater. Rhett, unaware of what the girl was thinking replied, “well, there ain’t no harm in showin’ up early. Better get you started now.”

When they arrived at the rink they were really early. Like Amy still nearly an hour till her lessons started. Only a few cars were in the parking lot so Rhett suggested they wait in the car until it got closer to the time, but Amy was like “no! Let’s go in! I don’t mind waiting inside.” “Well alright….” Walking toward the facility, Rhett missed how beneath the name of the building it said, “home of Olympic Champion, Y/n L/n.” Inside the lady at the counter smiled at Amy saying, “you’re early today Amy. The ice won’t be ready until they finish up down there, but i can get you your skates and you two can head on over to the bleachers.” Picking up her skates, since Amy didn’t have her own personal ones to bring, she carried them past the concession booth and locker room entrance to the stairs leading to the bleachers where music could be heard through the speakers.

As soon as the rink was visible, blue eyes landed on the figure gliding across the ice like she was a ballerina doing a solo on a the stage. Even from a distance Rhett noticed her beauty, which was only accentuate as she danced across the ice. She was dressed in a black turtleneck and leggings, white skates in her feet and hair slicked back into a tight bun. Rhett was pretty much frozen, captivated by the lone skater who was in her own element, unaware there were onlookers besides her coach who was off to the side. Each spin, each jump, each glide and Rhett felt like he was in a trance—until Any pulled him out by hissing under her breath, “stop being creepy and sit down, uncle Rhett.” When he did Rhett noticed a look of awe in Amy as she watched the skater, leaning in to whisper, “this why you didn’t mind waitin’ in her’ when you still got plenty of time?”

With a grin and not taking her eyes off the skater, Amy began to rant to her uncle, “That’s Y/n L/n—one of the best figure skaters in the world. Some weeks ago some of the girls I do lessons with told me ‘bout her after I asked about the little shrine dedicated to her when you first walk in. You didn’t see it but it’s on the other end of the counter if we would’ve turned right instead of goin’ straight,” Amy paused to watch the woman, Y/n, complete a triple axel, one of the most difficult jumps in the sport. “Anyways, Ruby told me Y/n’s trained at this rink since she was five years old and is one of few people from this city to make it big in the world. She’s competed on the international level since 2010–and went to the Olympics!! Three times!! She’s trainin’ for the 2022 Games in China happenen’ next year. Her trainin’ is right ‘fore my lessons but gramma always brings right on time so I never get to see her unlike some of the other girls. I heard people on tv call her the ‘Ice Princess’ —not ‘cause she’s a great skater, but ‘cause she’s rude to reporters—but some of the girls say she’s very nice and welcomin’ when they’ve gotten a chance to talk to her before class.”

Impressed and captivated by you, Rhett does a google search and finds your career stats. Whistling under his breath, Rhett reads that since your debut at the 2009 U.S Figure Skating Championships at the age of 14, you’ve gone on to become—in your discipline of the women’s singles— a six-time National champion, a four-time World champion, and are currently the reigning Olympic champion of the 2018 Winter Olympics. Rhett also reads you have three World silver medals, are the 2014 Olympic silver medalist & the 2010 Olympic bronze medalist as well as part of the 2014 & 2018 U.S Olympic bronze medal teams. Bringing a total of five Olympic medals in three appearances. Rhett even came across a YouTube compilation titled, ‘Y/n L/n being the Ice Princess & snapping back at reporters for 4 minutes straight.’ Curious, Rhett watches it and all he saw was you acting how anyone would when asked about their weight, diet, personal struggles, and that they were getting old in a sport known for young girls.

What made Rhett’s eyes gouge from his head was when your information read that you were actually from Wabang. “No fucking way,” he muttered just as the music ended. Lifting his head he saw you exhale and skate in the direction of your coach. He couldn’t hear what was being said but soon you were back in the middle of the ice doing spins so fast it made him dizzy. You continued practicing elements of your routine for the remainder of your training. When it came time for you to exit the ice, feeling bold, Amy jumped up and raced to the entrance of the ice to meet you there with Rhett calling out to her. The sound caught your attention, where you smiled at the sight of a little girl beaming up at you with awe in her eyes, “well hello.”

Introducing herself, Amy politely asked for a picture which you happily agreed to just as Rhett approached with an apologetic expression. Immediately you thought he was handsome and looked away when you connected eyes. Gosh they were the most gorgeous shade of blue you’d ever seen. “I’m so sorry, ma’am. We didn’t mean to bother you, Ms. L/n.” You brushed it off saying it was not a problem and you were enjoying Amy’s company, hoping Rhett couldn’t pick up on the fact you found him extremely attractive. Since Rhett had the phone, he quickly snapped some photos of you two before he and Amy thanked you for your time. Amy’s lessons were about to start so you wished good luck and to have fun before heading to the locker room to freshen up and change since you weren’t gonna be back in the rink till later that night.

Rhett could not stop thinking about you after that. Whenever Amy had lessons Rhett would offer to take her, making his mother confused, and, coincidently, would arrive 20-30 minutes before her lessons just to watch you train. Sometimes her friends in the classes were also there, so it worked out cause then they weren’t the only two being lowkey creeps. Finding it amusing—especially when Rhett tried to make it look like he wasn’t completely captivated by you—you’d wave to them and say hello when passing by on your way out. Rhett would tip his hat, giving you a smile that nearly knocked your skates off.

Amy had lessons every Saturday & Sunday afternoon so after a month of admiring each other from a distance, you made the first move by approaching him after changing into your hoodie and jeans, “This seat taken?” “Not at all. Please, be my guest.” You two talked the entire duration of Amy’s lesson. After finding out they were also from Wabang, and Rhett mentioning he read you were from there, you explained to him, “Yeah my ma worked as a nurse here in the city and would bring me everyday while she worked almost a twelve-hour shift. I basically grew up in the rink. My pops was a ranch hand ‘til he hurt his back and homeschooled me so I could skate. I moved closer to here when I turned eighteen—but my folks still live in Wabang and I visit every week.” Rhett then talked about his family’s ranch and bull riding and soon Amy’s lesson ended. While she was getting changed you and Rhett exchanged numbers after the cowboy asked if you wanted to get coffee the next time you were in town.

The feelings between you two bloomed over several weeks of texting, phone calls, and going on dates whenever you were in Wabang or having Rhett travel to the city. One of your dates actually was bringing him onto the ice after the days lessons were done and nobody wad there. That memory would go down as the funniest night of your lives with Rhett losing his balance, bringing you both onto the ice several times because you two were holding hands. “C’mon, cowboy, give me one lap without falling and I may just give you a kiss when the night ends.” Oh you bet your ass he did everything in his power to not fall on that one lap. When it was a success he immediately asked for his payment, and so your first kiss happened right there in the middle of the rink. From that moment on you were his and he was yours

When you came to the ranch Rhett would teach you to rope and ride a horse. His mother nearly had a heart attack when you met for the first time, obviously knowing who you were because she’d seen the shrine dedicated to you and your accomplishments at the rink. She couldn’t believe her son actually was in a relationship with you. Amy was over the moon and happy for her uncle. Royal and Perry were actually impressed but lowkey made bets on how long it would take for Rhett to fuck it up.

Rhett was head over heels for you and made the promise to never let you down. You were his woman and he became your biggest supporter. Even when Amy didn’t have lessons Rhett would come to the rink in his free time to bring you food or sit in on your practice. He saved up money just to travel and watch you compete, spent time on learning the different moves and jumps, and how the scoring works. You’d made it known to him that the upcoming Beijing Games were to be your last if you made the team so Rhett became your personal cheerleader to motivate you to do your best. “Baby, you’re gonna make that team—no doubt ‘bout it. Just keep doin’ what’re doin’ and that gold medal will be yours again. And I’m gonna be cheerin’ you on every step of the way.”

You made Rhett feel things he never thought he would feel. You inspired him, motivated him, was not only his partner but his best friend. With you he never felt like a disappointment. You made him laugh, held him when he cried after a bad day, encouraged him to follow his dreams. Rhett loved you so much he couldn’t picture a life without you. Even when he would rant about how you deserved better than him, you stayed by his side, kissing him breathless to show you were just as crazy about him as he was of you. “I don’t ever wanna hear those words again, Rhett Abbott. I don’t just open heart to anyone. You are the most amazing man I’ve ever met, and I love you so much and I’m going to make sure you know that everyday. You’re my cowboy, Rhett Abbott.”

You would attend his rodeos, cheering in the stands which has some of the locals shocked to see you there. Although you no longer lived in Wabang many of the residents knew who you were. Whenever the Olympics came around your picture was on the front page of the newspaper, detailing your accomplishments. Many couldn’t believe one of then had made it to the worlds greatest sporting stage and was recognized as one of the best athletes in their sport. They also couldn’t believe the notorious Rhett Abbott had managed to pull you—confirmed by the dropping of jaws when Rhett swooped you off your feet to kiss you when he finished his ride. He’d been up front with you about his reputation, but you assured him you’d never judge him by his past and as long as he continues to be the man he was to you then you were in for the long haul. “C’mon, cowboy, let’s show ‘em you’re better than what they perceive ya.” With his Stetson on your head, you had to hold back smirking at the disappointed looks from buckle bunnies.

Being a professional athlete working to defend an Olympic title was challenging. There were days you didn’t hit your routine as sharp or fell on a jump. About three month before the trials you lightly sprained your ankle when you landed wrong on your triple axel, putting you off the rink for two weeks for it to heal. During that period your stress and anxiety was high, worried that you were falling off your game and would miss your chance at winning a second gold. 2018 was the best year of your life, winning your first Olympic gold in your third Games. Since then the commentators have put a lot of pressure on you and have go so far as to call you the ‘Ice Princess,’ due to your stone cold attitude at the press when they’ve asked offensive questions you’ve called them out on instead of giving a sugar coated answer to remain polite. Only the media seemed to be your enemy because friends, teammates and even competitors had praised you for standing up to the press.

On those days that were hard Rhett would take you out on a nice date before settling down for the night by cuddling on the coach with the fire going and have a movie on the tv. Rhett would hold you in his arms, running his hands through your hair and murmur words of encouragement. “I know you had a rough day, baby. But just ‘member that each rough day is a sign to do better the next. Tomorrow is a new day. You just gotta rest tonight and put your mind at ease, so let’s talk about anythin’ ‘sides the ice.”

When the trials came for the 2022 Winter Olympic team, you were the #1 overall skater for your discipline securing your spot on the team. You were in tears, hugging your coach as Rhett, his family, and your family cheered in the stands. He even had to wipe his face, overcome with emotion and met you when it concluded with a bouquet of flowers and a passionate kiss. “I’m so proud of you, darlin’. So so proud,” he said in between kisses, “you were incredible—I knew you could do it.” Unfortunately Rhett wouldn’t be joining you in Beijing due to the COVID restrictions set in place, but he promised to be up every morning to watch you skate. It was a tearful goodbye at the airport with Rhett telling you how much he loved you and would miss for the next two and a half weeks, and after several kisses and promises to call everyday he finally let you go so you could get through customs.

Rhett and his family sat down to watch the opening ceremonies of the Games where you led Team USA as their selected flag bearer. You looked so adorable in your outfit that Rhett couldn’t help but take a picture if his tv when the camera panned to you. Not much of a social media person, he did however post it on his story with the caption, “That’s my Ice Princess♥️⛸.” The nickname you once hated ended up being your favorite whenever Rhett called you it. Only he could make you flustered when it rolled off his tongue. He was your cowboy, you were his Ice Princess.

Making through with his promise, Rhett got up at the ass crack of Dawn the days you were set to go on the ice. Qualifications, team finals, short program, free skate, he was on his couch watching it live. When it came back you were the #3 overall qualifier, Rhett was over the moon. Then he and Amy cheered together when the USA claimed the silver metal in the team. He watched you with beaming eyes on the screen medal yourself and hold it up with pride.

On the day of your free skate, the final segment of the women’s signals skate finals, Rhett held his breath and was on the edge of his seat when you stepped on the ice. The last to perform, becoming a two-time Olympic champion would be down to the four minutes ahead if you. All through the routine he felt that familiar skip in his heart like the first time he saw you. You glided across the ice with ease, like a ballerina on stage. Each twirl, each jump was perfection and you hit every single element, finishing the routine with a grin on your face. You knew right then, as did the small crowd of local spectators and members of team USA as well as Rhett and y’all’s families back home. They were already celebrating with Rhett having tears in his eyes the moment your name came up with the overall total next to the #1 spot.

Rhett never thought he’d find love—especially with someone as amazing as you. You were the definition of perfection, the most dedicated, inspiring, beautiful person he’d ever met and everyday he thanked whoever above to allow him the honor of being your cowboy. When the gold medal was placed around your neck, and you announced the closing of a chapter with retiring from the sport of figure skating, Rhett couldn’t wait to be a part of the next chapter. But no matter what you did on or off the rink, you would always be his Ice Princess.

[depressoexpresso-anon]

OMGOMGOMG requests are open it's time to ride bitches- /j

but fr do you think you could write something not sfw w/ a yan!finn and a bratty orchid? ur my fav writer on here ngl ✋

Taken

Yandere Finn x Reader

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Waking up from a drugged state, reader is bound to a bed and fearing for their life until someone familiar comes in the room.

⚠️ WARNING⚠️

This story has depictions of kidnapping, being drugged, and suggestive material.

Also this story is a semi NSFW cause yandere AU's are not my thing.

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Pure darkness was the only thing you saw as you awoken from a deep sleep. You where suddenly snapped out of your groggy state when you remembered what happened to you.

And along with your adrenaline being, where millions of question that flooded to your brain at once.

Where am I?

What's going on?

Why am I here?

Were just some of the questions you thought as you tried to use your senses to try to figure out where you were.

You could feel the cold air that surrounded your forn and the soft bed under you. You also could feel the cold metal of restraints that bound your wrists and legs to the bed.

You had no idea where you were at and you had no idea what's going to happenen. One minute you were walking home from your job, then suddenly you felt a hand cup over your mouth and were pulled into the shadows. You don't remember anything else after that.

Your mind continued to race as you laid and waited to happen next. You just hoped that this was his doing and not someone elses. If not, you were screwed.

From a far corner of the room, you hear a door open along with light footsteps approaching the bed.

You felt a pleasantly warm hand brush lightly against your thigh and chase away your chill. You flinched away from the touch with the fear of what you're apposed kidnapper was planning. Then you heard a soft voice that made all of your worries melt away in an instant.

"Shh shh shh, my dear orchid. No need to flinch away from me. You're safe, you're ok." Finn said as he lovingly stroked your thigh.

"Finn! You can't do that to me! You almost had me scared half to death! You know how dangerous this world is!"

"Let me explain myself-"

"No, I'm not finished yet, Finn! What you did was extremely-" You were rudely interrupted by a rag being forced into your mouth, with a hand over it to keep it in place.

"Hush now orchid. I didn't get to explain myself." You felt the bed shift to support finns weight as he sat down.

"Lately I've noticed that there was a certain new fellow working with you. And today when I was going to come visit you I noticed he was acting... a bit closer to you than I would like him to be." Finn paused a bit, trying to collect his thoughts and to find the right words.

You felt Finn's hand slowly drift away from your thigh to your croch and gave it a light squeeze.

"I thought this can be a great opportunity to remind you of who exactly you belong to, my sweetness." And with out skipping a beat you felt the buttons of your pants pop open along with your zipper unzipping. Your breath hitched a little as Finn pulled at your pants.

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Thank you for reading!

Love Ya ❤🧡💛💚💙💜🖤

[chicaquedicess]

someone has to be doing brujería on me dude the amount of horrendous shit happenening to me lately can NOT be a coincidence?????? just today alone i had a baby migraine, overslept, had some random bitch in accounting pop off on me, had the store manager get pissy w me for no reason, lost my favorite ring which was not only expensive but one of a kind and sentimental, and the cd I ordered came in shattered 😶

[bumpscosity]

oh also have any nice things happened recently / are there anything cool things happenening soon?

one of my favorite bands is releasing a new album on the 2nd and just uploaded a sneak peak today and it sounds so goooood

i have more money than i thought i would this month so im gonna buy myself something tomorrow, what that is depends on a couple things (e.i. of thing is a limited release monster high doll that might sell out before i can get her) but i think with how this past week and a half or so have been on me i deserve something nice :)

oh im supposed to go to disneyland again some time before november! not sure EXACTLY when yet but its a pretty big special interest for me so being able to PSYSICALLY EXIST within said special interest for days is a MAJOR mental vacation for me (even if i end up sore for days after from walking so much LMAO)

[namsmaboi]

BTS reaction to telling you to disappear when you have depression but they don't know (Jungkook)

Hello!

This is an answer to a previews request. Sorry for the delay and thank you for your patience. Feedback is Always welcome.

Pairing: Jungkook x reader

Genre: angst

Warning: mention of depression

You didn’t know how to act. You were never good in those situations. Jungkook was back from practice late and with a bad temper. 

The moment he walked up the door, he seemed to drag behind him a dark cloud that seemed to pull at his facial expression and his posture. Not even looking you in the eyes, he passes by the living room towards the bedroom muttering a faint "I'm home" and you could've missed the way he slightely limped on his left foot if you didn't make a double take on how he threw his bag on the couch. You were supposed to have a movie night and you prepared popcorn and all the snacks he likes, but as silence extendes from the bedroom way after he has changed into comfy clothes, you walk up to him worried.

"Aren't you gonna come to the living room? It's movie night. You forgot?" You adress a laying body ontop the bed, his forearms hiding his eyes. "Not today baby. I'm just going to go to sleep." Surprised by his tone of voice and his avoidance of any eye contact, you sit at the edge of the bed, prying his arm from his face. "Are you okay? You never miss movie night." "I'm just tired from practice and filming today." Seeing as neither does he elaborate nor move you decide to leave him be. You know about those exhausting days where you only look up to laying in bed and let sleep envelope you in its warm arms. "Okay love. I'll let you rest. You are welcome to join me in the living room anytime." Stretching to kiss his forheard, the knee that is supporting your weight on the matress nudges his left ankle which makes him jump in a small flinch. Now that is worrying you. " What is... did you..." you ask reaching for his calf and ankle and he unconsciously moves it away from you, which causes him to feel more pain and let out a small cry. "It's nothing, it's just a bit sore from prac..." "Omg, it's bloated. What do you mean it's just a bit sore? Your ankle is twice the normal size." You stop him, inspecting his ankle while taking off his sock. "I told you it's nothing." "What do you mean nothing? Did you get it checked? How were you even able to walk on it?" "Will you just let it be. I told you by tomorrow it will be okay." "You mean you kept this from your hyungs and managers? Are you insane?" "Listen, I can't afford being injured right now, I can't let them down. It will be okay in just a bit." "You can't afford... I swear you're crazy. How is keeping such an injury a secret doing anyone a favor? If the situation gets even more complicated not performing won't be even an option, it will be an obligation." "Why are you being like this? I told you I got this." "But you'll..." "Why won't you just leave me alone? It's not like it has anything to do with you. You don't understand." "Don't say this. I..." "Can't you just disappear? I told you to leave." Now sitting up, Jungkook yanks your arm from him and lays to the side, his back to you. Seeing how agitated he is, you silently exit the room and sit on the sofa among the soft blankets. Pressing play on the first movie on the recommendations, you lay back trying to calm down. The snacks forgotten on the table in front of you and movie playing as white noise in your ears, your eyes are out of focus and your mind is clouded. You try to reason with yourself that it's nothing to overthink. He'll calm down and come to his senses. ‘You don't understand’. Nobody would want to harm himself like so. ‘Can't you just desapear?’ He didn't mean that for sure.  You spend that night in a battle with your own self, or rather that voice inside that doesn't want to shut up. It makes senses from time to time, and other times paints a dark image on your time with Jungkook.

By the morning, all the thinking took its toll on both your body and soul. Feeling heavy, you don't find the strenghth to get up from the sofa. Jungkook seems to have left while you dozed off. Drowning as the day goes into your mind, this time not thinking about anything, just a huge emptiness, you ignore the multiple phone calls you hear coming from your phone left on the kitchen counter, you don't feel hungry at lunch time, you only stand later in the evening to use the bathroom. With weak legs you barely stand, hand supporting you on the kitchen counter. As if a clear ray lights in your mind, you become aware of what is happenening. The old darkness is trying to take you in again. After years of a rough battle against it, you were doing fine, occasionaly recognising the first signs of a depressive episode and dealing with it the way your doctor taught you to do, but you didn't this time. Maybe you got overwhelmed by the personal weight of the situation, or maybe you weren't doing that well after all. A surprising surge of energy and courage takes over your body, looking around for your medecine between your personal belongings. When you finally find it, its empty. Not wasting time, as you know this strenghth you feel defying your own mind won't last for long if you don't do anything, you get dressed up and leave for the drugstore to get your medecine.

Jungkook comes back home with the help of Taehyung and Hosoek. He was embarassed and sorry for having them deal with this. The moment he steped foot in the company, he met Jimin whose eyes caught up on the weird way he walked and the grimace on his face everytime he took a step. Things escalated quickly leading him to have his injury looked at by a doctor and being dismissed from his performing duties until his ankle gets better. Now laying on the couch, Jungkook looks at his hyungs in the kitchen setting his soup for him to eat. He was surprised to see your phone on the counter knowing you're still supposed to be at work. 'Maybe she slept in this morning and left in a rush forgeting it' he thought to himself, and a slight feeling of guilt buit in his chest knowing he could have woken you up when he left in the morning, but after last night's fight he wasn't able to face you. He was really stupid and blinded by his pride. "Is this what you took for the pain?" Hosoek asks him lifting a box of what seemed like medecine that was on the counter. "No, I didn't take anything." He says extending his hand to grab the box from his hyung, not familiar with the box covered with red warnings on the packaging. He wasn't aware you took any medecine. Bothered by the red warnings and suddenly taking in the state in whitch the house is. Exactly the same as he left this morning. Your work bag still laying on the comode in the entrance, the dishelved but still warm blanket on the sofa, the popcorm bowl that seems to not have been touched. His eyes settle on the box of medecine in his hand and your deserted phone. A quick search on the net tells him enough about what the medecine is for to put him in a panic. And the fact that the box is comptely empty doesn't help.

You open the door to a chaotic scene of Hosoek and Taehyung holding back a limping and crying Jungkook from leaving the house. Your appearance puts everyone to silence and you are taken aback by the weight of Jungkook jumping to hug you. 

" Thank God, you are alive. Baby I'm so sorry." His words are highlighted by the tightness of his hug. Hosoek and Taehyung left behind him relieved but also confused, decide to leave you two to talk it out. "There's soup on the stove and his medecine is on the table." You thank the guys as they leave and you help Jungkook back to the couch. "How's your ankle?" you ask him but his eyes are fixed on your face, worry still present. "I thought I lost you. I'm so sorry for what i said." Giving him a smile you reassure him and spend the night talking about your past and worries, and he's all listening ears, tearing up from time to time. At the end of it, he realises how stronge you are, and how he is lucky to have you.

[omegafan101]

Technoblade said something big is happenening today. I wonder what-

Quackity: I AM GOING TO KILL TECHNOBLADE

Tubbo: HUNTING DOWN TECHNOBLADE

Me: ... Oh... Uh oh

[arthurflecksgirl]

Subway scene /Arthurs POV

The subway is moving forwards, while everything inside of me is standing still. Frozen. Numb even. The numbness takes over me, except for the real bad headache. I shouldnt have done that. Hurting myself. But sometimes I just cant help it. Sometimes the sadness turns into anger and I dont want to hurt anyone, so I punish myself instead of anyone else. Instead of the people that hurt me all my life. I just sit there and take it, and try to cry my eyes out afterwards, but I cant even do that. Not a tear.

Silence. At least on the outside. Inside of me silence doesnt excist.

I don`t say much. I would love to talk a lot actually, but I gave it up when I realized that people won`t listen anyway. I prefer to write in my jornal nowdays. Its saver for me. My journal can`t missunderstand me. At least I hope so.

But yeah… if only they would give me the chance to explain myself. They would notice that I`m a good guy.  But they won`t. To them it doesnt matter how big my heart is or that is filled with lonelyness. I do write my jokes for OTHER people. To make them happy. To be seen as someone who want to spread positivity. But they remain unheard. My jokes are only scribbles in my journal. At least up until now. I`ve got the feeling that change is about to come. Like….I can feel soemthing growing inside of me. Not sure what it is though. Its just a gut feeling but trusting my feelings is another story...

I look outside the window. Graffitys on the dirty surface cover half of my reflection. Half of my face, a blurr. Funny because thats how I feel right now. I notice how worn out my face must seem to others. A sad eyed clown, abandoned from the rest of the world. I can`t smile for anyone today. Not after Hoyt fired me. How could I ever tell my mum when I get home? I just told her that she shouldt worry about money, or me. That my stand ups are ready for the big clubs. And now I got nothing left.  Not even my job, which I loved. Mum and I didnt had much money but it was enough to get us through. What now? She`ll be so dissappointed in me. I wanted make her proud. I wanted her to watch her son up on the stage, thinkng “I`m so proud of him. He really made it. ” But all she is going to say now is “Oh happy. I guess you just weren`t funny enough”.

I turn around and face the seats, trying to get eye contact with a lady. I crave human connection so much. It would feel so good if she would just look me in the eye for a second. It would be like a proof that I am here and people notice. But she doesnt. Maybe she`s too caught up in her own thoughts. Maybe she questions her own existence just like me.

The doors open, she gets up and leaves. A deep sigh is escaping my painted lips. Three guys are getting in, talking about a girl they danced with. The conversation caughts my attention. Sounds like they were at a dance club or something. I`ve never been at one, so I try to hear all the details about how a normal guy would manage to make out with a girl. I really could need some good advice, but after only a few seconds I realize that the guys must be drunk. One of them claims that the girl was in love with him, while his buddy says it aint true. Nothing to learn here.

It is now that I realized that there is a pretty girl sitting across me. “Want some french fries?” one of the drunk guys asks her and the way he does so makes me feel uncomfortable.  Him trying to get her attention feels wrong.

“Helloooo?” .

“No, thank you” The girl seems annoyed. “They`re real good!”  he says, before he starts throwing the food at her.  “C`mon” the other one says “He`s being nice to you”.

The girl just wants to read her book. Why would they even bother her? I have never been on a date before but this sure isnt how I woud treat a woman. I would try to be a gentleman. To become a beautiful memory which she writes down in her diary when the day is done. I want to become a romanic page in a womans diary. A poem. A lover.

I take a look at the cover of what she is reading. Alice in wonderland. I like that. Alice knew how to create a world of her own. Reality couldnt bother her anymore. But her dream world did. I guess there is just no way to escape your own mind.

I get nervous, noticing that she makes eye contact with me. I was longing for eye contact just minutes ago but now that this pretty girl looks right at me I`m sweating.  I guess she wants me to say something to them. To step in and tell them to leave her the fuck alone. The friendly clown looks like he could help her out. And I want to. I want to stop them so bad. I want to get up to those guys and tell them to fuck off. To leave the girl alone with her book, Alice and her imagination. But my body won`t let me. I am frozen. My legs won`t move. I`m just sitting there. What kinda man am I, to not help her out? Just a sad clown on the subway. Nothing more. All I wanna do is cry.

And there it comes….. hmmm... haha. I shake my head. No. please not now. Not in front of a pretty girl and some bullies. This is bad. I`m in deep shit now.  I can`t hold it back. The pain. The urge to cry, to shout out. To scream.

The laughter. Its making its way up my throath again. I want it to stop! At the same time there is something inside of me that acually thinks that this is funny. Those drunk idiots trying to impress a girl by throwing french fries at her and I`m actually hoping to learn something here when they came in. What a joke.

I can tell  by their dirty looks that I already caught attention . The wrong kinda attention. the kind of attention I`ve never asked for. Leave me alone to cry.

“Is something funny, asshole?” his voice is hurting me. I try to tell him that he should ignore my laughter by gestures, but he doesnt get it. I guess the girl is scared of me now which makes it all so much worse.. She passes me by,disappearing, as the guys throws stuff at her “Bitch!”

Hahahahhahahah. I reach the point of pain right now. My throath feels sore from trying to hold it back.  My heart tired from asking myself why I am still laughing.

And just as the pain starts to spread its fire on my insides, the guy comes up to me, starting to sing. I know that song. I know it well.  “Isnt it rich? Are we a pair? Me here at last on the ground. You in mid air. Send in the clowns.”

A chalkboard.  Chairs. That smell. My teacher looking at me like i´m a freak. Fists. And more fists.

With every step he comes closer I get flashbacks from getting bullied at scool. The look in his face. in his eyes. I know that kinda look. He`s a fucking bully. And I`m his victim.  Nothing new I know. But that song…it really gets me. I love Frank Sinatra. His music means so much to me. It hurts that this guy is using it against me like a weapon.

“Isnt it bliss. Dont you appprove? One who keeps tearing around, one who cant move?”

Yeah….thats right……hahahahhaah I CANT move while you are dancing around like an idiot. Hurting me. Do you have any idea how much you are hurting me? Look at my face. I´m hurt. I`m in pain. But people never notice and you keep on dancing. You`re the one who is laughing. Not me. I`m crying while I have to listen to your terrible interpretation of Send in the clowns.  You can`t even carry a fucking tune!!!!

“Send in the cloooooowwwnnnsss” he sings, his eyes focused on me in a disgusting way, while the other one is sitting down next to me. I feel intimitated as he grabs my Carnival wig, exposing my real hair , while I cant stop laughing with pain in my eyes. Not the wig. Please not the wig. I need it. I cant afford another one and I have to find a new job as a clown soon.

“There ought to be CLOOOOOOOWWWWNNSSS…..” the first one looks at me in anger, the second one putting my wig on, laughing right into my face. I can smell the alcohol in his breath. The way he laughs at me. So rude. Just like back in scool. I`m back in scool. This is a nightmare.  Why would they want to hurt me? Don`t they realize I just want to be left alone?  I wish they would go away. Why is no one else around? But I guess I dont deserve someone saving me. I wasnt even able to hold them back from annoying the girl.

“So tell us buddy. Whats so fuckin funny?”

“Nothing!”. Finally my chance to explain myself.

Hahahhahahah “I have….I have a condition” I try to catch my breath. Its so hard to breathe, so hard to talk between the laughs. My hand reaches for the card. I  have to read it out loud, so they know.

Its too late.

“I´ll tell you what you have, asshole” he replies, grabbing my bag. I try to get it back, but the other is fast, holding me back. Grabbing me violently from behind, while the first one tries to attack me. I cant belive this is happenening.

I cant use my arms. This is worse than being handcuffed. I kick the guy in front of me. Kinda shocked I was able to make a move.

“We got a kicker, huh?” he says. “Hold him steady, hold him steady” he screams, right fore he punshes me right in the face ,so hard that the other one lets go of me. The next thing I feel is hitting the ground. Hard.  Lying there with a sharp pain that makes its way althrouh my body. I lie on my right side. My ribs hurt´. My head is pounding, hands  touching the dirty ground, trying to figure out if this is really happening ? I cant move. Freezemode is taking over. . I just cant do anything but take it like a good, little boy.

I`m a kid. Just a kid again. And its dark. And I dont know where I am. Or what day it is.

“Stay down,freak!“

Happy

Freak

Arthur, my name is Arthur.

They kick me in the back.Harder. All three of them now.  

For a moment I am afraid they will kick me to death. Three guys and some clown, paralyzed on the floor? I could definitaly die in here and no one will ever know. I`m not afarid of dying. But this isnt how I want to go. Not on the floor. Not while getting kicked by some assholes. They would step over my dead body and I would remain invisible..I cant let them do this to me. Not again.

Is this my inner voice talking? The one I used to feel lately? Is this the blurry part of my reflection?

I feel my left  arm moving and  remember the gun. The fucking gun Randall gave to me. The weapon that brought me nothing but trouble. Maybe this thing will be good for something eventually. Maybe it will save my life. Well Randall. Sorry for ruin your plan.

Those guys will get what they deserve now.

Bang! Bang!

That was fast. One is already on the ground.

Bang! Bang!

I never thought it could be so easy to defend yourself.

The other one is hitting the subway door.

There is blood but  no time to take a look at it. The third one tries to run away as I fire the gun one more time. I only caught his leg. He`s liping, as I grab my stuff, trying to catch my breath. To get my thoughts straight. The gun in my hand. God. there is a gun in my hand. Still. For a brief moment I seem to lose all orientation. Did i just killed someone? What should I do now? What about the third one? My mind is all over the place.

Breathe, Arthur. Breathe. I have a lump in my throath. Not sure if from the laughing or from the panic.

The sound of the guy banging against the subway door awakens me from my thoughts. The door opens and he tries to get away. But he won`t. I`m a fast runner and he can barely walk. I have to finish this now. Just one more guy. I have to bring this to an end. One more shot. He falls to the ground.

How does it feel there, on the dirty ground? Can you taste the concrete? Because I did.

Can you feel the cold against your aching bones? Well, I did. And it was crawling up its way on my insides.

You killed me first.

Every single one of you bullies.

You killed my hopes and dreams.

My innocence.

This is what you finally get.

Do you see me now?

Can you feel, that I am real?

Because I am.

And so is this gun.

I ran up close to him as he screams, trying to crawl closer to the stairs.

No one heard MY whimpers when I thought I was  almost dying in the alley.

I fire the gun. Bang Bang Bang. Until there are no bullets left. Until he doesnt move anymore.

Freeze mode, huh? How does it feel?

One who keeps tearing around. One who cant move.

And then… silence.

Exept the noise in my ears. I take a short look at the body lying in front of me. He really is dead. Huh. . Kinda surprising what a gun can do.

I press my hand against my ears. That noise.  I hope there will be music again, soon.

I take a look around. No one is there. Time to grab my stuff and get gone.

I ran up the stairs as fast as I can and  feel myself changing with every step I take, with every short breath I become something.

There is a glow inside, as I run into an unknown desitination, my shadow ahead of myself

[viva-la-trans]

quarantaine Q&A

I was tagged by @alexandrintea :D

Are you staying home from work/school?

Jupe! I have online school now... Heh. Help me.

If you’re staying home, who’s there with you?

My parents and younger sister! Oh and our three cats of course

Are you a homebody?

Hmm, I'm... Not sure. I mean, yes. But I'm going crazy having barely zero real life contact with my friends. So this is making me realise I'm way less of a homebody than I used to think

An event that you were looking forward to that got cancelled?

Well... I'm mostly just extremely happy the cavetown concert was a week before this shit happenened...

What movies have you watched recently? What shows are you watching?

My adhd ass has FINALLY managed to start watching One Day At A Time. Which means I'm extremely bored. Help me. (great show though. Realistic ptsd, queer rep and a loving family?? I'm?? Yes.)

What music are you listening to?

The usual, mostly Sleeping at last. Also a lot of Cavetown. He brought out a new album so I'm pretty darn happy with that!

What are you reading?

Ha ! Maybe when I get even more bored my brain will be able to focus on a book for longer than 0.25 seconds, but today's not the day

What are you doing for self-care?

Uhh... My mom has been forcing me to go on walks and to actually eat. I'm also drawing a lot! And talking and videocalling with my friends and girlfriend helps a lot!

[chando37]

Today is my birthday. Im 26. 8 years ago, I would have thought that my life would have been all figured out at 26. Turns out that I havent figured out a lot but this is not necessarily a bad thing. Every day I thrive to learn something knew, to push myself further without actually knowing where im going. But thats the beauty of it all. Enjoy the ride, not the destination.

Today my mom told me she was proud of the man I was becoming. It made my day.

It made my day because sometimes im not proud of myself, sometimes I doubt myself so much that I forget who i am. With everything that happenened in these last few months, it made me doubt who I was becoming. I remember one particular night where I felt alone, ashamed and sad. And then I remebered a quote from one of my favorite movies "Why do we fall? So that we can learn how to pick ourselves up".

I realised that I had fell. But in the end, its not the fall that matters, but the way we get back up. And I did get back up. I worked on the friendships that I neglected in the last few months and boy did it feel good. I had an honest talk with one of my best friend. we both cried for hours but it was one of the most beautiful signs of caring and friendship that I received. I felt like a was releasing a ton of pressure and that I could finally have a new start with my friends.

Anyway, today is my birthday and I didnt get any wishes from you. Somehow I hoped that you would send me a text wishing me a happy birthday and telling me that you are doing good. You didnt and thats fine. I just wish that you knew I think about you everyday. Not in a positive or negative way, I just think about you. I know you think youre nothing to me but thats not the case and it sucks that I cant tell you that.

Cheers to my anniversary and to the next projects to come. I cant wait.

[tipsycad147]

A  POEM  FOR  MY   PATH

I face the path of my faith.

This is the way I've come,

The journey my soul has taken,

to bring me where I am today.

I recall the people I've met on this path,

Teachers all.

Kind and unkind--------

Whatever they did, they walked with me awhile.

And showed me their paths.

I bless their being and their teaching.

I remember events & encounters along the way,

Pleasent or painful,

Always instructive----------

Whatever happenen, it was useful,

And in its own integrity it was beautiful.

I learned to follow my own path,

I bless the path of my past.

Holding my present in my own hands,

I face my future now.

I face a new path every morning,

Everyday I step forward on an unknowen path,

A unique path sprinkled with the star stuff

off the Goddess!

In Her presence, past, present, & future

are one time

And I'm where I'm supposed to be---------

Now and always.........

My path is in Her..................

https://sites.google.com/site/apaganpath/Home/a-poem-for-my-path

[pampolahh]

Dear diary- Quarentine days

Today I decided to start my studies. English classes to be more especifc. Look..I gave up easy! Right now Oasis plays “Champagne Supernova” and my mind flies to my past. I’m not strong enough to stop it. Realy don’t know why, but her face, her touch and smile walks inside my head. She dances and looks at me like “yesterday” ( 2014). This moment stop and I look back like a real one. It’s not real It never would be. She’s here taking all my time and fellings! That’s why I chose to write, Maybe the memories decided to go away! Haha Maybeeee….

For now I have an question for the universe: How long, year or hours she ll live here like this? I hope soon. “Stop crying your heart out” plays Are you F..kidding me? Hahah ok he says: Hold up Hold on Don’t be scared You’ll never change what’s been and gone May your smile Shine on Don’t be scared Your destiny may keep your warm (yes..  I really recognize all the music) Is true We cannot change what happened! is just a emotional moment. Today is a day… It doesn’t happenen every day..

He says: Take what you need And be on yyour way And stop crying your heart out Niver mind!! I’ll find my way anyway!

oh- the sun came in through the window after this gray day. Shows me that nothing  is permanent. All this things have their own time. Smile, even if not for me, its ok. I wish the sea of happiness. My deepest desire! After all, it will always be in my memory whit love.

Hope my road surprises me whith peace,

because I already know where I want to go and be.

Is coming!

I’m not alone,

have the best friends and family!

Righ now is all I need:

(...)“ Is here in my warm”  Depeche says

at this point the sun is gone, I paused this text a thousand times before putting the dot.

Have a nice night folks

[atrixfromice]

A little update.

Hi there folks! Hope you’re doing well!

Not sure if someone is interested...but I would like to make an update about how I’m doing in these moments. Here in my town we were also told to be on quarantaine recently, and the goverment closed a lot of public places including bancs, malls, recreative parks and museums,restaurants, bars, and my workplace as well, to prevent the virus spreading.

So I’m on quarantine since last week. And it’s not a different change in my life, because I usually don’t do anything other than go to work and then go home and rest. I have no social life as I have no friends in my town, the few friends I have are from other countries and I’ve met them on the sites I post my art. So I don’t feel bothered for being at home for a few weeks. I’m even happy to not having need to go to work and be at home all day XD

What worries me about this is though, that no work means no pay check for me, and even if I have some food right now, I think it will not last much. Also I have electricity, internet, rent and water bills to pay every month, I hope I can find a solution withing this month for all this. I’ve been thinking to open comissions but I’m not sure if in the actual situation people would be interested...

I’ve been tried to do make the best of this quarantine time, and do stuff I normally can’t have the ocassion to do because I go to work, like cleaning on detail my house, organizing what I have in my closet, sculpting, and of course drawing!

Although I actually haven’t sculpted not drawn a lot in these times, because of the heat that’s been torturing my town, specially the past two weeks. Heat of 40º c on daytime it’s something even me who I can stand well the head, I’m not used to have! And that makes even the littlest of the tasks or house chores become a monumental task.

It’s crazy! I swear I feel like one of those wax figures on daylight, or an ice cream someone left to melt on the summer sun XD Today the heat have decreased a bit so I can finally the the strenght to write about what’s happenening on my side at least.

I know these are difficult times for everybody, so if you can't don't worry.  But if you wouldl like and can affort supporting me in these moments my workplace is closed , you can do it here on Ko-fi

Oh and by the way, I take the chance to thank you a lot for all the love you’ve given to my tinkerbell drawing! Because I’m not sure if tomorrow the heat will let me write or not.  Thanks so much for all your love and patience in these moments when I can’t make much art! I appreciate it a lot! ^^

[myvelouri]

Whassup diaryblr

So

Today I worked with K. I had a closing shift, she had a mid shift so we got to see each other for only 2 hours.

You're gonna probably hate me for this

But here I go

So I was sweet to her and hugged her and low-key flirting and all. Our other co-worker is trying to get with her but she's not into him at all

Um. I know I'm a hoe, and I already told her I don't do relationships. But

Hmm

So during her break she came and sat next to me and I was working the fitting room. I saw this girl that looked familiar and she went to the restroom. K was sitting right near me. I mentioned that girl looked familiar. That girl finally came out. She said she had a condition to my manager before going to the restroom. So I stopped her and was like "hey, where do I know you from??" And she goes "I don't know but you also look really familiar" and I mentioned a bar I think I met her at. And she goes oh yeah! And I said "what's your boyfriend's name again?" And she mentions his name and I said yeah! I met you two that night! And she's like omg yeah! And I said that was a wild night! She said "ohhhh yeah" and made a face like something EXTRA wild happenened lol. She said she's actually no longer with that boyfriend. She said she was out even tho she's supposed to be in bed but got so tired of it. She honestly did look a little pale and out of it. But she's absolutely fucking gorgeous. I remember when I first met her, I made out with her friend who liked me too and we were joking about her having big tits lol. I mean but I liked her face a lot, she does have a gorgeous body like wtf, but, I couldn't hit on her or flirt cause she was with a boyfriend at the time. So anyway, today I asked if she had an Instagram. And she gave it to me. And she was very positive and happy and said "oh yeah, I'm gonna follow you back!" And she later on did. I saw her Instagram profile and she has a TON of fucking gorgeous friends in all her posts, even the babe I made out with, I was like, omfg. A lot of em were my type and I just let my thoughts go wild for a moment. But yeah... K saw all this (except for me seeing the girls profile cause that was later on) and K suddenly got upset. Quiet. And she kept moving away from me. And being kinda mean and I asked what's wrong. And she kept saying "oh, nothing" and "I don't know, why don't you tell me"

And come on dude we aren't together. She got very jealous that I got that girls instagram, I mean I knew that girl before and I was always attracted to her. Plus me and K aren't together and I thought we made that clear.

Ahh

She was so so upset with me. She said something mean and I can't remember what. She was being passive aggressive

But she lightened up later. Cause I was being myself and sweet

But now I'm at a loss...

Somehow my lunch break happened when she was off so we went to Applebee's and she said it's on her. I said no way! But we only drank, the tab was 5 bucks, lol she never tips

Um I remember her saying "I think you secretly hate me" and "I thought I was waifu" cause I call her that since we had that joke, she calls me hubbu, I mean we did that even when K had a boyfriend... She broke up with him just like 2 days ago man

Um

She told me how the co-worker was trying to get with her. And I said why don't you hahaha. And she said "oh yeah? You want me to? And she wasn't serious but. Then she said "besides, there's someone else I already like" and I said who?

And it was OBVIOUSLY me

I sat on her side of the booth when she said she was cold btw. Leaned her head on me

She got my neck! Kissed it. Turns me on and she knows it's my spot

When we stepped out I just grabbed her and started making out with her

Got in my car, and a few moments as I'm starting up the car so goes for my neck, kissing it, with her tongue and everything and it's my spot so I immediately started making out with her

Hmm

Oh yeah the mean thing she said was about me not getting hours because of me doing poor at work. It's cause she was mad though. She doesn't really think that.

But yeah

When we got back, we made out more in the car

I jus

Ahhhhhhhh

I don't want to hurt anyone. I don't want a relationship. I do like her though. But nooooo

[vixenichigo]

Racism

I'm going to preferace this by saying I'm a white, female australian with a tan . . .

I was walking to the bus stop with two girlfriends from uni (both also Australian, one grew up predominantly in Switzerland, the other, Hong Kong, so both have obvious accents) when this uncultured swine, as he was walking past us, told the girl from Hong Kong to "go back to your country" . . .

I'm ashamed to say I was so shocked that we had walked a few more steps away before I had the chance to retort (which was a very loud, very bogan "what a dickhead!").

I wish I had of done more cuz now I'm sitting on a bus, seething, letting it all out here.

I have NEVER been witness to such blatant rascism, never. And I would love to think Australia is BETTER than this. Better than ignorance, better than rascism and better than a lot of other countries with zero tolerance for foreigners.

But apparently nowhere is safe when it comes to uneducated idiots who think they have a right to publicly belittle and harass other people.

If you see this happenening in the streets, I beg of you. Stand by that person. No one deserves to be ashamed of where they come from just because a general concensus full of ignorant, abusive blowhorns believe they're the superior.

Do better than I did today.

(This is not me tellin you to punch bigots btw, just stand by that person and let them know they are welcome to make this country their home too.)