#this is assuming all las readers are above 18 because THEY SHOULD BE.

[imreszekeres]

everyone who bookmarks LAS has permission to put it in my ass

[golden-kettle]

No Place For Love (Mista x GN!Reader)

Guido Mista x GN!Reader - CHAPTER ONE

TW// Strong language, slight violence

You’ve dedicated the beginning of your young adult years to Passione and La Squadra. You weren’t about to choose the enemy over the opportunity to finally get the pay you and your teammates deserved. Right?

Word count: 1,888

It’s been a hot minute since I posted something, so here’s the new project I’m working on! An enemies to lovers story with Mista :) I’m going to try and update as much as I can as I’ve been thinking about something like this for a while. hope you enjoy the first chapter 💕💕 Trusting anyone outside of your gang is a death wish. There's no room for love in the mafia of Passione. You knew this better than anyone else. Sure, you aren't the same as you were years ago. Naïve and inexperienced. However, would you be willing to throw it all away, the blood you've shed and the strength you've gained, for a singular person? That was the very question Risotto asked you when you returned from an incomplete mission, slightly injured.

"I shouldn't have to say what we all know, but this goal is what we live for," he said.

The goal he was referring to was that of taking over the drug routes of Passione, defeating the mysterious boss in the process. It was something you found was impossible, until Risotto told you and the other members of La Squadra that the boss had a daughter. And that daughter, Trish Una, was under the protection of  Bruno Bucciarati and his squad members.

You were told to go and find their current location in Italy as if it was the last thing you'd do. You'd then place a tracking device on one of the members and leave as quickly as possible. Simple, especially for the traits and powers of your stand. So why were you sitting here in front of Risotto with the tracking device in the palm of your hand?

"You need to go back there."

You looked up at him with guilt in your eyes, a silent plea to let you at least spend the night at the base then try again tomorrow morning. Risotto understood right away, observant as he is. With a sigh, he spoke in a low whisper.

"You know that if I let you stay here any longer, the others will say I play favorites. Get going."

You stood up and brushed off your clothes, walking to the door to exit Risottos office. Putting your hand on the knob, you froze without turning your head.

"Risotto, I have one request."

He didn't say anything in response, keeping quiet. Although you knew he was listening.

"If I can't carry out this mission in 48 hours, call me a fool."

With that you left the room, swiftly exiting the base and paying no mind when Formaggio attempted to spark conversation. Deep in your gut, you knew Risotto had no clue as to why you took the time to say such things, but you did. Because before you failed at completing this mission, you ran into someone you've only seen in a photo on an information sheet. Guido Mista, age 18. Stand name: Sex Pistols. 

The first time you saw him you intended on putting the tracking device on him. You would knock him out once he was alone, put the small device between the grooves on the bottom of his shoe. Then leave as if you were never there. Obviously, fate had other plans.

He was standing in line at a café, a small list in his hands. Presumably, what the rest of his squad wanted, you thought. When he finished ordering the list of pastries and drinks, he glanced over his shoulder to you. His eyes widened for a second until the cashier told him his total. 

"Ah, yeah, let me get that."

You watched as Mista shuffled through his pocket, pulling out money to pay. 

"I'll be paying for their meal too," he said as he gestured to you.

"Oh, that won't be needed sir," you said with a smile

.He returned your smile with one of his own, "what do you want?"

Is he trying to flirt with me? You thought before telling the cashier your drink order. Mista then paid for his and your order, walking over to a table to sit while he waited. You did the same until he waved you over. What's the harm in sitting with him while you waited? Perhaps you could get something out of him.

"So what's your name?" he asked, practically beaming when you sat down across from him. 

You answered truthfully, there was no way for him to have any information on you. A staple of being on the hitman team is being anonymous, so there was no background on you. If you were to die, the only way you would live on was through the memories of your teammates. 

"Ah, well my name's Mista, I haven't seen you around before, although you look Italian. You from the south or somethin'?"

"No, I'm from around here. I probably just got lost in the crowd. Or you aren't that observant." 

Thinking that you might as well play along, you didn't feel guilty in teasing him a little bit. In fact, he seemed to enjoy your banter.

"Oh, I am insanely observant. Like for example, you have a stain on your shirt right there," he reached over and pointed. 

When you looked down, he raised his finger and flicked your nose. You couldn't even be mad at his kindergarten teasing. You crossed your arms as he leaned back and laughed.

"Haha. Very funny," you said with a smile, "but are you willing to tell me a bit about yourself, Mista? I will say it's not every day I get someone to pay for my order."

"Sure can do, what are you dying to know?"

"Why did you decide to pay for my drink?" You knew you should ease into the questions so you could get something notable out of him.

"Isn't it obvious? I think you're cute."

You laughed softly at the statement, "you're right, I guess that's self-explanatory isn't it?"

Mista hummed, "my turn to ask you a question. What do you think of me?" he grinned, putting his chin between his forefinger and thumb.

You took a moment to think. No way in hell you were about to boost his ego more than it seemed to already be, but you weren't about to be flat at rude instead.

"I think you're generous, yet insane to be wearing a hat and knitted shirt in the Italian spring sun," you spoke out of a light laugh.

"That's fair."

You smiled, leaning against the table and rubbing the back of your neck. You turned your head to avoid his gaze, acting shy, as you spoke your next question.

"You have plans after this? I know you probably ordered for a group of people.. but maybe we can make a detour at my place?" you glance back at him with an innocent smile on your face.

"Well... I do have plans after this, but I'm sure they can wait. I want to get to know you after all."

How gullible can he be? Isn't he a gunman in the most notable mafia present in Italy right now? No matter the case, you just found an easy opening. This mission would be completed earlier than you thought.

After some small talk and retrieving your order, you lead Mista down the street and into an alleyway.

"My apartment is just on the left side once we get through here," you smiled, "but you won't be seeing it."

Mista glanced back to you, confused by the last few words of your statement. With that, you used your stand to push him to the ground, knocking the bag of pastries and cardboard holder with the drinks out of his hands. You watched as he reached for what you assumed was a gun in his boot, but straddled over him and pinned his hands above his head.

"Fucking hell, how are you so strong? What do you even want from me?"

"I want you to shut up and sleep," you spoke with a total shift in tone and attitude.

He grinned to your surprise, then in a flash he wrapped his leg around yours and flipped you over. Now he was pinning you down. He grabbed his gun and let go of your hands, pressing the gun against your forehead. 

"Who the hell are you?" he demanded."

I told you my name, Mista. Don't have me repeat myself."

He pressed the gun harder against your head, but your face remained neutral and unbothered.

"You're part of a gang, aren't you? What are you after from Passione? Or are you after us specifically?"

"Don't you think there's no point in asking me questions if I'm not going to answer them?"

Mista moved his gun in a flash, firing a bullet into the ground beside you. He then pressed its barrel against your forehead once more.

"I'm not messing around."

”You were a few minutes ago. Honestly, it seemed like you were so sure you were gonna get a kiss from me. Maybe more. Just how down bad are you, Mista?"

"Stop saying my name as if you know me."

"But I do know you, dear. That new capo, Bucciarati. He broke you out of jail and you joined his squad. The name of your stand is Sex Pistols, truly fitting for a man like yourself."

With that, he slapped you across the face. You froze for a second before speaking again.

"..Did you just slap me?" You spoke in a tone of utter shock.

"Want me to do it again, “dear”?"

"What are you, a sadist?"

"What are you, a masochist?" He replied, clearly mocking you.

This wasn't going to get you anywhere.

"I'm sick of this," you said, manifesting your stand behind him.

Your stand then put its arms around Mista's waist and pulled him off of you. You stood up and ran back to the crowded streets of the town, taking the shock he had of you being a stand user for granted. Once Mista gained his senses, he started to chase after you. However, it was a lost cause. You were already lost within the people. 

It wasn't until you were running for a half-hour that you realized you didn't complete your mission. Risotto was bound to be pissed at you. Hell, you were pissed at yourself. You had no clue what came over you.

"What was I thinking?" you said to yourself.

You could've had your stand knock him out while he had you pinned down. In fact, that was the plan when you walked him into that alley. 

He's attractive. That's why you didn't hurt him. You sighed. As much as you didn’t want to admit it, that was the only reason that made sense.

"God damn him."

As you walked back to your base you thought about what you'd say to Risotto. Maybe you could convince him to let you spend the rest of the day rethinking a new plan and get some sleep before acting on it tomorrow morning. Instead, you ended up saying nothing and let him scold you.

Now you were here, outside the base and walking back to the busy city Naples. Thoughts going at a hundred miles an hour, you knew Mista probably returned back to wherever the rest of his gang was. No way you could take them all at once. 

You told Risotto to call you a fool if you failed to carry out the mission because that's exactly what you'd be. You thought about his question. Would you be willing to throw away everything you've built for only one person?

Only a fool in love would do that.

[jtargaryen18]

Dynamite & Whiskey

Chapter 4

Series Masterlist

Story Rating: Explicit, 18+ only Warnings: Explicit sexual content, dubious consent Relationships: Andy Barber x reader

You’re a reporter and struggling with covering the murder trial of Jacob Barber. But you’ve covered his father’s cases for years. He was someone you admired. Little did you know he admired you too…

A/N: A minor spoiler alert for the show is now in effect. The central plot isn’t given away but there’s background information and a small bit of dialogue from the latest episode. As we near the end of this tale, I need to merge this story with the one on the show to end it as I planned. Thank you. 

~~~

You jumped when your phone hummed next to you on the couch. You were so riveted by coverage of the first day of Jacob Barber’s trial you just let it ring. You’d been so lost in thoughts that you should be there right now, covering that story. Doing your job.

As you watched, Andy Barber ushered his wife and son up the sidewalk, up the stairs of the courthouse. Their faces were set in stone, you’d expected that.

Andy looked so tired. So defeated.

You wanted to hate him for your current situation. You really did. You were stuck at home, laid off. And because of a couple of snide remarks made to you when you’d gone into town, you just didn’t go out a lot. You shopped late at night for what you needed and that seemed to take care of it. You weren’t a morning person anyway.

That woman’s son is on trial and you’re fucking her husband?

What’s it like fucking a murderer?

When you’d argued Andy hadn’t done anything…

No? The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, does it?

If you thought you had it bad, you couldn’t imagine their life right now. You’d read the article where the reporter caught Laurie at a diner, got her talking. They’d painted Andy as a friendless, loner and that certainly didn’t help anything. Another friend at the paper told you about an incident between Laurie Barber and Ben Rifkin’s mother in the grocery store one morning.

There’d been the rumor about Andy’s father and after doing a little research, you discovered that one was true. Your heart broke for him because as much research on him as you’d done, you’d never encountered that. Apparently, he hadn’t wanted that bit of family history known. You understood.

In the last few weeks, you’d seen Andy only a handful of times. He never texted or called and you understood why. He always came late at night. Since he wasn’t above breaking into your house, you’d just handed him your spare key. You tried hard not to think about the pure gratitude on his face when you’d done that, the way his gorgeous blue eyes had been edged in tears.

Every time he loved you, there was a desperation, a reverence in the act. Each time felt like it would be the last time you’d be with him and each time, you assumed it would be.After all, what could the future hold for the two of you?

If Jacob were truly innocent, how would that change things for Andy and his family? Would everything heal? Could they go back to being a happy family? You knew that was probably for the best.

Had you just been a temporary convenience when Andy’s world had fallen apart?

If Jacob were found guilty? Andy would be destroyed. What he had or didn’t have with you wouldn’t matter. Not in the face of that.

Andy Barber had been the worst mistake you’d ever made. 

And deep in the night when you were alone, often crying yourself to sleep about the limbo your career was in and worse, the mess he’d made of your heart, you couldn’t bring yourself to regret anything.

No, you were dumb enough to hope. To wish that maybe one day…

When your phone started again, you saw that it was Lawrence and you decided to go ahead and answer.

“You’d better answer the goddamn phone,” he grumbled before you could say anything.

“Yes?”

“There’s a lady you need to call,” he said without preamble, “at a paper in Boston. She needs some help and likes your work.”

Your heart sped up a little at that.

“What?”

“There’s a lady named Lilah Bennett,” Lawrence went on. “Here’s her number. Write it down.”

“Wait!” You scrambled for your pen and your Sudoku book. “Go ahead.”

You wrote down the number and the name with a shaking hand.

“You trying to get rid of me?” you tried to make it sound like a joke but missed it by a mile.

“No, but I hate that you’re sitting on the sidelines right now,” his tone was kind. “Give her a call. Might be nothing but it’s worth a shot.”

Tears stung the backs of your eyes. You were grateful. “Thank you, Lawrence. You don’t know how much… I appreciate you.”

“Don’t thank me,” he told you meaningfully. “Gotta go. Let me know what happens.”

Don’t thank me.

Andy?

Your heart knew the truth you hadn’t confirmed yet. Andy was behind this. Your heart raced in something like hope as you contemplated calling the woman in Boston. You believed him when he said he didn’t mean for your life to be upended for his sake. Maybe he was trying to make things right. Maybe he was thinking ahead for when the trial was over. If what he told you was true about his feelings and you ended up together, you’d need to make a new start, right?

Or he was trying to fix things for you before your brief affair with him ended. Maybe he was working things out with Laurie…

Tears slid down your cheeks now, the chaos in your heart and mind never left you. Anxiety and hope were shoulder angels that fought every day on the battlefield of your heart while you waited for him to come to you. While you waited for the outcome of his son’s trial.

Your phone hummed again, and you found a new text message. When you read it, your heart squeezed in your chest. It was from Andy.

I miss you.

 ***

 Andy blinked back tears as he navigated the darkness at the top of the stairs. He paused outside his son’s room, thinking like Laurie that he wanted to hold his son, to tell him everything would be okay.

But the cold sliver of fear in his heart whispered that things might not be okay after all.

The day in court had seemed promising but ended in total disaster. The revelation from Jacob’s friend on the stand today? It was hard for Andy to see a way past that. They had a few plays left. But between that reveal and Neil’s games that revealed his family secret to the jury despite the judge not permitting it…

Andy couldn’t believe it. He refused to believe there was a chance, no matter how small, that his son had done this. He couldn’t have.

Why hadn’t Jacob told them? He wasn’t deceiving them. Right?

Yes, he could. You of all people should know that.

His wife’s words were a knife in his heart. Not only did she absolutely believe their son did this, she blamed him. Did she mean because he’d been an attorney and that he spun everything for cases? That everything he said was a lie?

Or did she mean he couldn’t help but lie because of where he’d come from? Who his father had been…

Since Andy had told her his family’s secret, that his father was a convicted rapist and murderer, Laurie hadn’t been the same. The emotional separation had been everything he’d feared, why he’d kept it secret all these years. Now when he talked, she heard him but didn’t listen. If he touched her, now limited to hugs or comforting gestures, he didn’t think Laurie felt a thing.

Their marriage had been crumbling even before Ben Rifkin’s body was found. Maybe Andy had been in denial about that too. But Laurie loved a man he no longer was. Maybe he never really had been. The successful assistant district attorney, respected community member and family man.

Laurie didn’t seem him as that now. She saw an imposter who looked like the husband she was proud of. Had she ever loved him?  Did she even know who he was?

What do you want me to say, Laurie? You’re right. Our marriage is a lie. Our whole fucking family is based on a fairy tale built on nothing. And our son’s a murderer. Is that what you want to hear?

No. But that doesn’t mean it isn’t true.

The words broke him.

Andy had been swimming in guilt for weeks. He hadn’t lied to you when he told you that his marriage was over. It was. And he could have lived with that if their relationship had died of natural causes, the end hastened by the nightmare scenario that was their new reality.

Now he realized maybe Laurie never loved him at all. Maybe she just loved the idea of him, who she saw him as. Who she wanted him to be. Andy was no longer her perfect husband. 

Jacob was no longer her perfect son.

Maybe she really did believe it was all a false fairy tale.

Giving into his own tears, he listened as Jacob played video games in his room like he always had. He listened to Laurie sobbing downstairs before her light tread was on the stairs and she made her way into the bedroom they used to share.

Trying to bury himself in the cold bed of the guestroom, he realized he wanted to be anywhere but here right now.

Andy wanted to be with you.

God, but he couldn’t risk it. He didn’t know who the fuck the guy in the Lincoln was and all Andy needed right now, when things had gone so wrong at the trial today, was for someone to spot him sneaking out, heading to your house. They’d shame him with it in the courtroom, shame Laurie in front of everyone and she was barely holding up now.

He could make things worse for you too and you didn’t deserve that. He could only hope your boss had done as he’d asked and called you about the job offer in Boston. Maybe you’d accept it if it came from him. You were so damned proud.

Andy missed seeing you there at the courthouse. He would have taken courage just from seeing your face as he passed you on his way in.

Pulling his phone off the charger on his bedside table, he checked to see if by any chanced you’d answered the text he probably shouldn’t have sent you earlier. He just wanted you to know he did miss you. That he cared very much.

Andy’s heart skipped a beat to see you’d answered him.

Thank you for Boston.

I miss you too.

Andy sat up on the bed and pocketed his phone. Fuck this. His mind was made up. It might be a stupid ass decision, but he’d take the risk. Could he really make things worse than they were?

He knew he could, but the possibility wasn’t enough to stop him from making his way out of the house, down to his car.

Andy parked near the sandlot behind the middle school, jumping the fence at the back of your house and letting himself in the back door. The kitchen smelled like pizza and your perfume. The lights were all out, it was after midnight. He had to be back home early for the trial, but he could hear the sound of your laptop playing in your bedroom.

Andy wasn’t trying to be silent. He wanted you to know that he was there. He found you sitting up on your bed in a simple t-shirt and panties, watching something on the laptop on your dresser. You still jerked in fear when you finally noticed him standing in the doorway.

“Andy?” you asked quietly. You scrubbed a hand through your hair, the sexy waves cascading over your head.

His relief at just seeing you, of being in quiet solace of your bedroom, almost made him crumble. He hung his jacket on the knob of your door and toed off his shoes before joining you on your bed, moving slowly in case he was no longer welcome there.

It just occurred to him that you likely knew his dark secret too now. Would you reject him for it? Now that he was no longer the hero you wrote those inspiring articles about?

And what must you think of him with everything revealed about Jacob?

Your eyes were soft on him as he reached you. When you lifted a hand to his face, smoothing it over his cheek and jaw, Andy gave in to his sorrow. He collapsed into the softness of your lap, wrapping his arms around you like a drowning man. Like you could shelter him.

“I’m so sorry, Andy,” you whispered, your hands smoothing over his hair, his shoulders with a gentleness he didn’t deserve. “I’m sorry.”

There was so much he wanted to say. He just couldn’t. But you weren’t asking him questions. You weren’t making demands.

You just held him, opening yourself up like you could absorb any measure of his pain. In your arms, in that moment, he didn’t need to be the perfect family man, the ruthless district attorney. He didn’t need to be someone else’s strength, someone else’s defender.

Andy was broken. You were the only thing holding him together tonight.

You shifted in his hold after a few moments and he panicked, until he realized that you were just stretching out by his side, trying to get comfortable. Lying on your back, you motioned him to you. Andy wanted to be held by you, to listen to the strong beat of your heart.

But he wanted you more.

Pulling himself up on elbow, Andy’s gaze roamed over you. Just you. No makeup, no artifice in the dim light. You’d never looked more beautiful to him than you did right now beneath him.

When he leaned down to kiss your mouth, the softness of your lips, the taste of you infiltrated his senses. He kept it soft, seeking. Your gaze searched his when he pulled back, but there was nothing different in how you looked at him. There was no fear, no doubt.

You gazed at him like he was still a hero. You gazed at him like he was still worth something.

When your slender hands slid around his neck, your fingers sinking gently into his hair, Andy was lost. His heart was racing in his chest and he moved over you, taking you into his arms and holding you against him.

Andy tasted your lips for long minutes, your kisses so sweet. He chained more kisses across your jaw to the slim column of your neck, using his lips and tongue to seek out all the places that made you shiver. He loved making you press your body up into his in growing want. You gasped and shifted below him, your fingers grabbing at the hem of his dress shirt and pulling it free before racing along the line of buttons and undoing each with haste.

He interrupted you only long enough to pull the t-shirt off you, dropping kisses on your breasts and teasing that creamy soft skin with his beard because he knew you liked that. Then he got his mouth on them, teased your nipples into diamond hard points with his tongue and pulled at them with his lips at turns.

Andy lingered there as you came alive beneath him. Your fingers twisted in his hair, your thighs clenching in want as the scent of your desire drifted up on the heat of your body. His hands skimmed down your writhing form to smooth over those thighs, to dip into the wet heat they guarded.

When his fingers slid into the wetness coating the soft petals of your sex, he trailed wet kisses down to your tummy, more over the simple blue panties that were already soaked. They ripped away so easily in his hand and he tossed them away, more than eager to get his mouth on the most intimate part of you.

You didn’t disappoint him. You dazzled him as you mindlessly rode his mouth, your hands covering your breasts, your back arching gracefully when he did something you liked. The breathy sound of his name on your lips when he did something you loved had his heart clenching in his chest.

There was so much Andy couldn’t give you right now. Tonight, he wanted to drown you in ecstasy. That he could do.

His shoulders held you open for him as he teased your clit with his tongue. When he slid the first finger into your clenching channel, you started begging him. Mindless chants of please mingled with your scent all around him, a feverish spell that took him away from everything else. 

With the second finger, he found that space inside you. He stroked it whisper soft, just enough to light the fuse of his little dynamite but not enough to set her off. Andy kept his touch light, loving the way your thighs struggled to close around him, loving the high cries of his name that filled your room.

“Andy, please…” The words ended in a sob.

Andy stroked that space again.

“You need to come, Sweetheart?” he whispered, loving the sight of you destroyed above him. Your eyes were fever bright, your skin was shiny and your chest rose and fell with each labored breath.

“Please,” you begged him. “Please, Andy…”

You howled when he stroked that spot with purpose, holding your hips down with his other hand so he could bury his mouth in your pussy. His lips and tongue were relentless as the orgasm blew you apart, dragging out the shockwaves as the taste of your release filled his mouth.

You were adorably dazed and fighting to breathe when he lifted himself, working at the belt of his jeans. The taste of you’d had gotten him so hard, his cock aching as he shucked off his jeans and boxers.

Andy insinuated himself between your trembling thighs, sliding into you so easily and groaning from how fucking wonderful all that wet warmth felt as your body spread around him, making room. Your thighs slowly rose to clamp around his hips when he began to move in you. You didn’t resist when his hands collared your wrists. He pressed them down on the bed on either side of your head as his thrusts gained speed.

The tight heat of you felt so good, the softness of you beneath him something he craved so often each day. Andy gave you a taste of yourself on his lips as he loved you, and your moan went straight to his cock. It had him fighting off his orgasm desperately.

He needed you to come first, he needed to feel you clench around him like he was all you’d ever need.

Andy’s movements sped up as he changed up his thrusts. It didn’t take him long to find the angle that had you coming apart under him. Your greedy channel grabbed him, pulsed around him. Your wrists struggling in his hold. His name was a prayer on your lips as a powerful release shook you, took your breath away.

Andy couldn’t fight you anymore, his heart hammering in his chest. His thrusts came fast and hard, the wet heat of your body destroying his control as he came hard, pumping himself into you like it was the last thing he’d ever do…

It embarrassed him that he must have dozed off. The gentle slide of your finger over his face pulled him from sleep. His face was nuzzled against your chest as you lay facing each other.

Andy pressed a kiss above your heart.

“Sorry,” he whispered. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you.”

Your sigh was soft. “Andy, you look like you haven’t slept in a year.”

“I’d like to sleep for a year honestly,” he whispered. “Right here. With you.”

Your fingers felt so good in his hair, gently gliding through the strands in a way that relaxed him.

“Thank you for Boston,” you whispered above him. “I’m driving up to meet with Lilah on Monday.”

Andy gazed up at you, noticing the gentle smile playing about your lips. “Why do you think it was me?”

“I know it was you.”

And there it was. That awe, that admiration you’d always had for him. His heart ached in his chest at the sight of it.

“How can still look at me like that?” he had to ask. “With everything I’m sure you know now… How can you?”

You brushed a kiss on his forehead.

“Nothing changed about you, Andy,” you explained gently. “You’re going through one of the worst things anyone could go through right now. Your personal business, your family’s business, has been drug out for everyone to see and… I know it’s got to be hell for you.”

Andy couldn’t deny the truth of her words.  

“But you didn’t change,” you explained warmly. “You’re still the same man, Andy... You’re still a good man. A man with a strong heart.”

When you kissed him gently, his heart broke a little in his chest.

Reaching for his jeans in the hopes you wouldn’t see the tears gathering in his eyes, Andy fished his phone out of his pocket and set an alarm for himself so he could get back in time to be ready for the trial tomorrow.

He couldn’t help but feel that Laurie knew he was out for the night, but he couldn’t bring himself to think too much about that. Thinking of his estranged wife choked him with feelings of betrayal, resentment. After the fight they’d had earlier, that would only grow worse.

But here with you? Here he was happy. As happy as he could be anyway.

“I’ll probably be gone when you wake up,” he told you apologetically. “You don’t know how much I wish I could stay.”

You nodded, cuddling up to him when he stretched out next to you.

“Get some sleep,” you told him, snuggling into his chest.

Andy pressed a kiss into your hair. His heart whispering the words that he couldn’t say right now.

I love you.

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[youralternantpersonality]

Thanksgiving

Paul x Reader: Thanksgiving

Warning: Child Protective Services (CPS) and Adult Protective Services (APS) involvement mentioned. Death of elderly, and implication of abuse and neglect are written

Takes place LONG after the war with the Volturi; Renesmee is 16 and Jake JUST imprinted on her. Not when she was a baby. Let’s just act like Bella didn’t almost die when she had her and they just moved away until recently, okay? Cool.

Also like I said before, all the imprints are the same age as the guys. No pedophilia bs is EVER in my stories.

***

I met Leah in my Sophomore year at Washington State. I was going into Development and Family Structure whereas she was going in to be an RN like her mother. We met in a Health and Sex class that was considered as an elective course. Because we had to travel across campus to make it to this class, we always ended up sitting in the back of the class together. Eventually creating a friendship that you’d rarely see develop and stick together. Now, we’re Juniors and I am currently packing to head to La Push with her and her boyfriend Lajohn for Thanksgiving since I didn’t have a family.

I was lucky if I’m honest. I was given to the state at 12 after CPS finally indicated that my parents weren’t fit to take care of me and my grandmother. Unfortunately, it took the death of my grandmother for anyone to do anything. Although I was given to the state at 12, I didn’t leave until I was 18. The likelihood of getting adopted after 10 is slim. I was happy for those who did, but it hurt to see some of them come back. You realize through others that just because the idea of parenting is wonderful, being a parent is completely different. I was lucky enough to take advantage of resources that were provided for me and some of the other kids that lead me to this point.

I got my first job at 16 and worked from then onward. I applied to college and financial aid as fast as I was able to so that I wouldn’t be alone. I receive enough grants and scholarships for my associates and now working on my bachelor's. My previous roommates were, well, trash; which motivated me to get a job and move into the nearby apartments. My roommates now are chill, we all just don’t talk to one another. Which lead me back to this moment at my apartment.

“I don’t know what to wear!” I said looking in my closet for a perfect outfit to bring to Thanksgiving.

“I don’t know why you’re stressing about it. I told you, no one is going to care. But, if you’re that worried, wear the ripped jeans and the black off the shoulder sweater shirt. Oh! And the booties!” Leah said going through my closet. Even though she says and acts like she doesn’t care about fashion and appearance, I know deep down in the pits of hell that we call her soul, that she really and truly still doesn’t, but she has a soft spot for it.  

“Thank you! Oh, and I’m mad at you, you bitch.” I said packing up the outfit.

“What, why?”

“You got your eyebrows done without me! You see mine looking like Chewbacca over here!”

“I’d say more like baby Chewbacca…”

“That’s not the point!”

“Sorry, look, it should be around 12:30 or 1 by the time we get to Seattle, we’ll stop there. I promise.” She says smiling while hugging me. Bitch.

“Fine. Now let’s go before Lajohn comes up here like a brat crying.” We laugh and start heading towards the door. We have a long seven and a half hours to get to La Push. Let’s see how this goes.

~

We stop to get something to eat, fill up, and get my eyebrows done. Lajohn took that time to fall asleep in the car because knowing us, we’d get sidetracked and find some shit for everyone. But we resisted! Mainly because our paychecks don’t come in until next week and I’m barking on this dinner and the leftovers (if there is any based on what Leah tells me about her brothers) to last me until then.

 Paul’s POV

“Alright guys, now Leah is bringing her friend Y/n. can we please not repeat what happened when she brought Lajohn over to meet us.” Sam said, looking directly at Quil, Collin, and me.

“I swear I didn’t start it!” Collin tried to defend himself.

“It doesn’t matter who did or didn’t start it! We can’t have y/g knowing what we are. Lajohn is Leah’s imprint, she’s just her friend. Got it!” Jacob stated. I rolled my eyes but said nothing. I won’t lie though, I haven’t seen someone run as fast as he did, especially when he is almost as big as us and just as human as the next person.

“We won’t, I promise. Scouts honor.” Making a joke about this situation.

“You weren’t in boy-scouts Paul,” Jared said.

“That’s beside the point. Look, we’re not going to do anything to out us again.” I said with a smile. Not one person believed a damn thing I said, hell I don’t think I did either. But it’s worth a shot.

“Well now that we have that settled, we have to meet up with the Cullen’s. There’s going to be some unwelcome visitors stopping by in a few days, and the last thing we need is to deal with this on Thanksgiving.” Jacob said. We all got up and begrudgingly met up with the leeches. Can’t they give us a break?

Y/n POV

We pull up to this cozy small house with a swing set on the porch. A lady who I’ve seen in Leah’s room steps out of the house to greet us. I can positively assume she’s Leah’s mom.

“Lajohn! How are you!” She says, ready to embrace the giant man twice her size. Compared to Ms. Clearwater, he was a good foot and a half above her. Compared to Leah, a half a foot maybe. He was “6’7”, black hair in a fade, soft brown eyes, mocha skin, slim yet buff, and a complete gentle giant. He and Leah met in their anatomy class. She said she walked into class late after getting lost and the only seat available was in the front. The bad news was, she had one of those teachers who was a stickler and a petty asshole. He made it hell for her. The good news was, she met Lajohn who was good at the class and had no problem tutoring her. It was “Love at first sight” for both of them.

“Sounds like some hallmark bullshit. Let me guess, it was raining, you were soaking wet, and by the end of class he gave you his jacket and you looked into each other eyes and BAM! Instant connection.” I laughed. She rolled her eyes and smiled.

“Yeah, yeah, shut up Bunny. One day, it’ll happen to you. $20 says it will”

“What, falling in love or love at first constipation?” she gives me a look, and I just smile.

“Love you too Leah-bird” I laugh.

I snap back to reality to Leah joking around with another person coming out of the house. He looked just as big as Lajohn but resembled Leah and her mom. I can assume this was Seth. I step out and walk over to everyone as Lajohn goes to the car to get our luggage.

“Mom, this is my best friend-”

“Holy shit, Leah can make friends!?” Said the babyface giant.

“Will you shut up Seth! Yes, I can. Can you get a girlfriend? No, you can’t. So, hush.”

“Ouch Leah. That hurt.” He says folding his arms over his heart and rolling his eyes with a sad look on his face. I just want to make him cookies and tell him its okay.

“Anyways, this is my best friend Y/n. Y/n/n, this my mother Sue and my annoying-”

“Yet handsome.”

“-Little brother, Seth.” She says, ignoring him completely.

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you guys. I’ve seen pictures of you guys back at Leah’s apartment and she talks about home all the time.”

“It's nice to meet you too Y/n. Come on in and let the guys get your stuff.”

“Yeah, Seth, chop-chop little puppy,” Leah says clapping her hands to rush him. He just looks at her and gives her the finger when their mom isn’t looking and walks towards the back of the car. I can hear him and Lajohn talking about some pack of cold ones. I don’t think Seth is old enough to drink…

The next day: Thanksgiving

For the rest of yesterday evening, Leah and Ms. Sue (who keeps on insisting I drop the Ms. Part; I will not, my grandmother taught me to always say Mr., Ms., and Mrs.,) showed me around town and I was able to meet Emily and Sam, and Jacob and Billy. They seemed welcoming. Emily especially, although, Sam, Jacob, and Billy seemed on edge with me. I told that to Leah and she reassured me that their faces and attitudes are always like that with everyone. Lajohn eased my worrying saying they were worse with him because he was dating Leah. He was more scared of Seth and their mom out of everyone though.

Currently, Leah, Ms. Sue, Lajohn, and I are on our way to Emily and Sam’s place. When we pull up, we’re greeted by her and a few other girls from the reservation. We walk up and I’m automatically hugged by this small “5’8” girl with wild layered hair with streaks of color in it.

“Hey everyone! Y/n, this is my niece Clair. Sorry, she just gets excited about meeting new people. And this is Halulah and Kim, Embry and Jared’s girlfriends. Come one inside, the guys will be back in an hour or so. That should give us enough time to finish the turkey and dessert.” I waved at them and we all went inside. That time was short-lived until we heard wolves howling in the distance and Sam and Lajohn were out the door. I was about to ask what that was about but was cut off by Leah shoving plates in my hands to set up the table.

A little while later, we hear laughter and thumping of footsteps coming from the front door.

“HONEY I’M HOME! Ouch! Jared! What was that for?!” one voice said.

“For being a dumbass, that’s why.” I assume is Jared’s voice.

“Language!” said Seth followed by a loud punch and a yelp from him.

“Ouch, damnit Paul! That hurt!” said Seth.

“LaNgUaGe!” said, who I can assume is Paul with a bolstering laugh. Emily rolled her eyes and looked at Sam, who looked at them before they turned the corner. A choir of “sorry” and “my bad” was said before they showed themselves.

“Y/n, I’d like you to meet my children for all intended purposes. The boy who is giving Clair a piggyback ride to is Quil; the boy hugging Halulah is Embry—the one I told you about. This is Jared, Kim’s—godforsaken—boyfriend.”

“Hey! I’m not that bad!” she ignores him.

“Jake should be here with his girlfriend Nessie in a little bit, and the one behind us thinking I CAN’T SEE HIM STEALING THE TURKEY! Is Paul.” I looked behind her and catch a red-handed guilty-looking, Paul.

“Hey, at least I tri-” he stops mid-sentence as our eyes connect. I felt like I was in my apartment room reaching cloud 9. Everything around me blurred and all I saw was him. I felt my heart skip a beat and was knocked the air out of me. I couldn’t move, didn’t hear a sound, and kind of dizzy. I snap back when I hear laughter.

“Aww! Bunny! See! I told you it would happen!” Leah says laughing. I look at her confused then looked back at everyone else who was laughing too. Paul coughed and I looked at him. His expression went from being shocked, angry, sad, then content and surprised. He looked at Sam then walked over to me. Standing in front of me, he smiles and introduces himself.

“Hey, I’m Paul. What’s your name beautiful?” Damn, I guess I owe Leah $20.

[mthofferings2020]

wynnesome

See wynnesome’s existing works here and here.

Preferred contact methods: Discord: wynnesome#4442 Dreamwidth: stargraven

Preferred organizations: - Amazon Conservation Association - Médecins Sans Frontières (Doctors Without Borders) - Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN) - St. Jude Children's Research Hospital - World Central Kitchen (See the list of approved organizations here)

Will create works that contain: Angst wants: Dark characters/themes, unhealthy relationships, questionable power dynamics, shady morals/ethics, under-negotiated kink, dub-con, non-con, miscommunication trainwreck, physical and/or emotional torment, break-it, break-it-worse, ending leaves you bleeding out on the floor. Fluff wants: Banter, wordplay, crack, crack treated seriously, mutual pining, get-together, first-time, porn with feelings, emotionally cathartic sex/kink, aftercare, tooth-rotting-they're-so-married domesticity.

Will not create works that contain: Daddy kink, mpreg, scatplay, underage/de-aged, genderswap, Avengers: Endgame or post-Endgame.

  -- Fic or Other Writing --

Auction ID: 1239

Will create works for the following relationships: Stephen Strange/Victor von Doom - 616

Work Description: This auction is for a fic that will fall between 1k and 5k. To keep to the word length I'm comfortable committing to, the prompt or starting point needs to be concise. For me and the way I write, that usually means a prompt of no more than a few words to one sentence, defining a central theme or pivotal moment, and then the fic will take shape to bring that about. For general style of my writing, my AO3 has a range, and my Dreamwidth has a bunch of recent angst fics/ficlets. Here are links to two works I've written for Doom and Strange: - Doctor Doom crack/fluff - DoomStrange angst ficlet I haven't posted a lot of Doom or DoomStrange fic yet, but I am raring to go for this ship. I have taken part in many hours of brainstorming and RP for the pairing, and I have a brain full of headcanon and a folder full of ideas I'd like to write for these two. For a prompt that hits me in the right spot, I could also write DoomStrange/Tony Stark. I'd consider writing DoomStrange with a different third, but please ask me if you have something like that in mind. I love Battleworld DoomStrange: God-Emperor Doom and Sheriff Strange, and their canonical partnership. I do like to play with dark, problematic, and manipulative power dynamics in their relationship. If it seems soft, that's probably because somewhere behind it is a knife so sharp you won't feel it till the blood loss hits. But I can also write them in bantery, humorous, and outright ridiculous interactions. On that side, I love their "snipe and bicker but would sacrifice myself for you in a heartbeat" relationship a la Savage Avengers. When I write angst, I tend to focus on breaking it hard rather than fixing it, especially in a shorter fic. However, as long as I feel it's a prompt I can accomplish in under 5k, I'm open to the idea of hurt/comfort, of heavy angst with a positive resolution, or the kinds of lighter angst that come from mutual pining, misunderstandings that will get worked out, etc. Those situations where it hurts along the way, but everything is going to be ok. I write by letting my brain get a hook into a particular idea - or maybe more like, letting a particular idea get its hooks into my brain - to where it takes me over that threshold from "interesting concept" to "I have actual words insistently demanding to be let out now." With that in mind - if you have a very specific idea for a fic you'd like, please contact me before bidding, to make sure it's something I feel like I can hook and be hooked by. Otherwise, please be prepared to chat/brainstorm with me after the auction, so we can come up with an idea that we're both enthusiastic about. OR, I can also take a very small prompt as a starting point and just run with it. By "very small," I mean something like a word prompt or a kink or trope that might be found on a Bingo square. I'd take the prompt, and your preference for the general tone (humor, romance, angst, etc.), roll it around till I land on a compelling hook to get me started, and follow it from there. As far as my pile of "ideas I'd like to write," I'm open to discussing some of those that I think could be accomplished within a 5k fic. Time Frames: I'll be able to begin brainstorming/discussing prompts anytime after the auction week. I do have one pre-existing fic-writing commitment that I aim to finish by the end of 2020. So assuming we've worked out a prompt, I should potentially be available to start writing for this pretty early in 2021. Pinning down actual writing time is tricky, but once I've actually begun writing, a fic of this length usually takes me anywhere from a few days to a few weeks to complete. Please feel free to contact me to talk over any questions or ideas!

Ratings: Teen, Mature, Explicit

CLICK HERE TO BID ON THIS WORK

-- Beta Service --

Auction ID: 2091

Will create works for the following relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark - Any Universe Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers/Tony Stark - MCU Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers - MCU Bucky Barnes/Tony Stark - MCU Stephen Strange/Victor von Doom - 616 Tony Stark/Victor von Doom - 616 Jean Grey/Logan/Scott Summers - 616 Tony Stark/Stephen Strange/Victor von Doom - 616

Work Description: This auction is for beta reading of one fic up to 10k words, or two fics totaling up to 10k words. For beta-reading, barring my DNW, I'm generally wide open for characters, ships, universes, genres, kinks, and tropes, and for gen fics. A fic doesn't have to be "my ship" or "my kink" for me to read with care and give well-considered feedback on your writing, including elements of plot, continuity, characterization, tone, and theme, as presented within the fic itself. That said, my "Wants" and my Relationships section for this auction touch upon characters, ships, and kinds of works I read, write, and engage with the most for my own personal enjoyment. So those are where I'll be able to give the most detailed feedback on more levels, such as character voice, canon storylines, and general fluency with those characters and their worlds. My first Marvel ship is Steve-Tony, and I'm happy to read for them in any universe. I've spent the most time with them in 616, MCU, and early Ults comics, with light knowledge of AvAc, Avengers Assemble, and EMH. DoomStrange is my newer ship that I'm loving a lot: Battleworld God-Emperor Doom/Sheriff Strange; Triumph and Torment; Savage Avengers. Plus other pairings for either character, or threesomes/moresomes with the pair of them involved. Another area I'm VERY much here for is any and all fics related to Jonathan Hickman's X-Men comics: HoXPoX; Dawn of X; X of Swords. I jumped on board with X-Men at HoXPox last year, and am up to date with reading all of the current X-Men titles. I have almost no knowledge of prior X-Men canon, so, as mentioned above, I'm still happily willing to beta for other X-Men works, but I won't have that same degree of connection to canon and characters. As a beta reader, I can work on several levels, ranging from simple SPaG/proofreading, to detailed suggestions for sentence structure, flow, and word choice. I can help advise in regard to (American) English-language phrasing and word usage. I also really enjoy delving into emotional dynamics and thematic development. In terms of personal areas of expertise, I'm a musician and recording engineer. So I can give a lot of "what it's like" and some light scientific "how it works" if you have a fic where someone is a musician, in a band, playing a gig or concert, recording in a studio, or a variety of other possible situations involving the music industry and/or audio and sound systems. I prefer to beta-read in Gdocs where possible, where I can leave a lot of suggestions and comments. My goal is always to help the author feel good about their work and about making it the best it can be. So I appreciate your guidance in ways to give you feedback and/or critique that will be helpful, positive, and constructive for you. If I haven't beta-read anything for you before, I'll want to talk with you before I begin, to get an idea of the kinds of feedback you're looking for. Then I'll probably work through a page or two and wait to go further until you've had the chance to take a look. From there, you can tell me if there's anything I could approach differently, address, or avoid, in order to be more helpful for you. Time Frames/Schedule: I have a couple of pre-existing fandom commitments that I'm aiming to complete before the end of 2020. I'd prefer to say "early 2021" as the soonest I'll most likely be available to fulfill this auction. I give a lot of attention during beta reading, and often work in short sections at a time, over a period of days. For a 10k-ish fic, I might take anywhere from a few days to a couple of weeks to work through the entirety. Generally, once I've worked through the fic, I'm also happy to continue exchanging comments, or take a look to see how see how things are working after changes are made. For any questions, please feel free to contact me!

Ratings: Gen, Teen, Mature, Explicit

CLICK HERE TO BID ON THIS WORK

The auction runs from October 18 (12 AM ET) to October 24 (11:59:59 PM ET). Visit marveltrumpshate.com during Auction Week to view all of our auctions and to place your bids!

[slapmeagain-blog]

COVID-19 LIFE

18 May 2020

How can it be 12 days since I last posted?  It must be the distraction of improving weather, the amount of time I am spending on the garden, and getting ready to enjoy the outdoor season: bringing all the outdoor furniture up from the basement, cleaning the porch, patio and deck, putting covers back on all the cushions, moving all the plants that have been hibernating in the sun room out of doors; ferns for the urns on the front steps, and hanging from hooks above the balustrades on the porch, potted palms next to the wooden furniture facing Pearl street.  There are the big self-watering planters filled with semi-tropicals on the deck off the sun room and the giant urns on the blue-stone patio.  New plantings in the bare spots in the flowers beds, potting a new lime tree, an on-going losing battle with crabgrass and other unworthy competitors to my lawn.  I could have a booth selling dandelion leaves for salad at the Wall Street farmer’s market on Saturday morning if I had the time.  Re-seeding bare patches under the copper beech tree and the corner near the vegetable patch, seeding herbs and greens in tiny compostable pots that have to be misted twice a day.  Cutting away dead leaves and growth from everything and moving the potted plants from beneath the living room windows to their appointed positions out of doors.  Ahh....

The weather had been so cool, damp and dreary, that I had to take matters into my own hands and say enough is enough, that it was about time we moved from bare hints of spring to full on spring mode on May 14th, mainly to keep Marco from packing his bags and moving back to Tuscany, where temperatures are already well into the high seventies and eighties.  Temperatures here rose as ordered.  We hit 80 a couple of days ago which has delayed Marco’s imminent migration.  I even enjoyed a pitcher of iced tea!

Meanwhile, in the wider world, 90,000 Americans are dead, and there have been 1,400,000 confirmed cases of the virus. 36,000,000 Americans have filed unemployment claims (Marco and I are not eligible) and armed civilian militia have overrun the Michigan state  legislature and shut down Oregon’s demanding that the governments re-open the economies. Who are these people?  They are clearly a small but vocal minority of the disparate groups of supremacists, right wing Christians, and hard line second amendment defenders who are being encouraged by the man in the white house (note to my great-grandchildren: many people in these times refuse to even speak the name of the current resident of the White House.  Something we borrowed as a form of protest from the Harry Potter novel series where people were afraid to even mention the name of the antagonist -- Voldemort.)  We’re not ‘afraid’ to mention his name, we just feel that he shouldn’t be given any form of legitimacy, not as a man, and certainly not at as a president.

Closer to home, here in Kingston, NY, a barber in a hipster-retro shop on John Street, has been cutting hair on the sly, in defiance of the shutdown, and has been diagnosed with the virus.  Officials are searching for anyone who might have had their haircut by him (eye roll). On the brighter side, Liberato (Marco’s niece's fiance was finally able to legally open his brand spanking new barber shop in San Querico (Tuscany) this week and is booked solid for two weeks -- 97 appointments.  It’s curious that the Kingston barber made international headlines.  We heard about it from as far afield as Siena (IT) and Geneva (CH, not NY!)  Most people are taking the shutdown seriously, but many are not, and it’s a very divisive topic.  One security guard was shot, in Michigan, for telling a customer to put on a mask or leave the store.  Another liquor store owner in Flint (Michigan clearly has anger management issues) was shot in the ankle for the same reason.  Many people feel that the lock down is a useless exercise, that we should just open up and get it over with.  It’s not killing as many as we thought it might, and cases have started to fall off in the worst hit places.  But the whole point was to ‘flatten the curve’ to prevent the health care system from getting overwhelmed and to protect the vulnerable.  That part has worked.  So where do you begin, and how much is enough, to get the economy started again without creating new spikes and hot-spots of the disease and risk overwhelming the hospitals?  The scientists argue that it can’t be done safely until we have tested most of the population to get a handle on how many people have already had it.  Supposedly, 60% is a magic number for ‘herd immunity,’ above which the virus will slowly die out because it can’t sustain itself in a smaller pool, but that assumes that once you’ve had it, you are immune.  The jury is still out on that.  So much information, so little reliability.  Example: Marco read in the Italian press today that the US had come up with a vaccine and was testing it.  Here, however, the medical professionals are saying we are at least a year, maybe two, away from a vaccine.  It’s no wonder people are acting crazy.  Anyone can  pretty much find someone out there who is saying exactly the thing that appeals to their fears and some of us act on those fears, with the encouragement of the 12-year old in chief, who says he is now taking hydroychloroquine, the efficacy of which is questionable and is said to have potentially harmful side effects.  A couple of months ago, a couple in Arizona took it after he touted it.  The husband died and the wife was hospitalized in serious condition.  Well, let’s hope he manages to kill or incapacitate himself soon.

That’s plenty on that topic.  I don’t know if it is because we are safely ensconced in Kingston in a big house surrounded by lawns and stone walls and flowers that I don’t feel particularly under threat by the virus.  But at the same time, I don’t feel the loss of human contact (other than with Cole, Ashe and Carter and the hugs). My time is my own, and I’m enjoying finding ways to fill it -- cooking, reading, planning for reopening my hospitality locations, gardening, studying, watching movies....  My biggest fears, really, are economic.  When this is over, what will my investments be worth, what will the townhouse in Brooklyn be worth, how will I support myself, help Marco, and leave something to my son and grand kids when I go?  Up until now those were not serious issues for me. 

 I do miss eating out in places where I know people or places where the food is particularly transcendent, but cooking at home and really investing in keeping food interesting, has been a pleasant challenge.  And as I settle in to lock down -- it’s been two months now -- I find I am seeking less amusement in martinis, mushrooms, and space cookies, and more in reading, writing, studying and cooking and actually having a schedule for those activities.  I also love the efficiency of online visual visits, both personal and for study and business.  I’m staying in closer contact with so many of my friends than I did before lockdown.  We have a call tonight at 7 p.m. with Joe and Vicki in LA which I am looking forward to, and we are doing a weekly family call on Sundays with the kids, Roy and CT in Hawaii, Maud in Brooklyn, Hedy and Firth and M and me here in Kingston.  

Hawaii, by the way, is pretty safe.  And here, in Ulster County, we’ve had fewer than 40 deaths and 1500 cases.  And considering how many people like me have fled from the city to Kingston, I’m surprised it’s not higher.  East Hampton, for example, was a hot spot because of all the rich NYC types that have homes there and left the city.  Sorry, sorry.  I promised to stop.  Times article says that wealthier neighborhoods in NYC have lost 40% of their population!  I’m so glad the kids are at our place to keep an eye on things.  And Marco’s finding a rhythm, too.  Check it out.

I finally plodded though to the end of Thomas Campanella’s book, “Brooklyn: The Once and Future City”.  It was very, very informative, even if many parts of it would be far more interesting to civic planners and architects than to casual readers, but it really did put a lot in perspective on Brooklyn’s economic and social trajectory through nearly 300 years with some interesting segues into geological formations that impact the place still today.  Sadly, as interesting and appealing a place as Brooklyn is, very little scholarly work has been done on it’s history.  Until very recently, the focus has always been on Manhattan.  It did correct a number of my own misconceptions.  Importantly, despite the fact that Robert Moses was not thrilled at the design for the proposed Dodger Stadium at the intersection of Flatbush and Atlantic Avenues, it doesn’t appear that he, on his own, could have stopped it.  Research suggests that it was the disappearing fan base (fleeing the crime-ridden city in the 50s and 60s) that made the move to LA more an economic decision than has otherwise been speculated.  And I’m no fan of Robert Moses. The study group, in the end, actually wanted to put the stadium complex in Park Slope, bordered by Sterling, Bergen, Vanderbilt and Boerum Place.  What a disaster that would have been on so many levels!!  Not the least of which would have been the United Jet that crashed in that spot in 1960. And the Weisberg’s wouldn’t have been my neighbors for 34 years because their house would have been razed.

Other non-essential slightly amusing details. Deer ‘resistant’ plants are not deer ‘proof’.  And our herd doesn’t seem to be made up of fussy eaters. So, we are frustrated by the number of our plants that are being ravaged.  Apparently, based on an internet search, Marco has discovered that piss and cayenne pepper are good home garden deer deterrents!  Well...  I am putting it to the test with a mixture of BOTH.  I’ll keep you posted on results.  (I won’t go into detail on how the mixture is obtained/prepared, interesting as it may be.)  Hungry?  Peanut butter, honey and banana -- not since I was 10 years old.  Think I’ll write a kids’ Covid cookbook!

[dysphoric-dumbass13]

All of the bookish asks. I hate you. And your stupid fucking face. Im so tired dude i stayed up ridiculously late to finish that

Hey I stayed up ridiculously late to finish mine too. Well not ridiculously late because me and then I couldn't fall asleep anyways but whatever. And you literally love me you jackass.

1. (what book did you last finish? when was that?) Willingly? Leah on the Offbeat by Becky Albertalli, in July. For school? Of Mice And Men. I didn’t care that much, and I forgot to finish A Midsummer Night’s Dream, but I still finished my project fine without any issue whatsoever and should get at least a B, if not an A. But whatever.

2. (what are you currently reading?) The Odyssey, for school. But also I’m like ¾ of the way through What If It’s Us by Adam Silvera and Becky Albertalli. (what book are you planning to read next?) Well for English it will have to be A Narrative of the Life of Fredrick Douglass by Fredrick Douglass, Night by Elie Wiesel, Farewell to Manzanar by Jeanne Wakatsuki Houston, or Lord of the Flies by William Golding. However, I really want to read The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller. And I’m also trying to get a hold of the Harry Potter books because I haven’t read them since I was 7, and I was a compulsive moron so I read them out of order based on length and the title. I did that a lot.

3. (what was the last book you added to your tbr?) I don’t fully know what it means by that, but I’ll give this a try. The last thing I remember actively seeking out that I need to read again (for writing purposes, and the fact that I’m a nerdy bastard) was the Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling.

4. (which book did you last re-read?) Leah on the Offbeat by Becky Albertalli, I loved it so much that I read it twice in one month. I also re-read Simon vs. the Homosapiens Agenda by Becky Albertalli twice before moving to the former.

5. (which was the last book you really, really loved?) Again, Leah on the Offbeat. I loved that book so much oh my god.

6. (what was/were the last books you bought?) I actually bought 3 books in September (after I got all my books for English), which were Leah on the Offbeat, Simon vs. the Homosapiens Agenda, and The Song of Achilles.

7. (paperback or hardcover? why?) Paperback. The hurt less to hold while reading, and they’re cheaper so I can buy more of them. But I do love a hardcover book if the cover is really intricate and beautiful.

8. (ya, na, or adult? why?) Idk. To me it doesn’t matter all that much as long as it’s a good book. I really like anything that isn’t racist, sexist, super heteronormative, transphobic, or hating of any particular religion (except like if it’s vaguely poking fun at catholicism and christianity because we deserve it)

9. (sci-fi or fantasy? why?) Fantasy. God I just fucking LOVE fantasy. I wrote a 20,000-word oneshot that was of the fantasy genre. I just love it too much.

10. (classic or modern? why?) Idk. Doesn’t really matter, again, as long as it isn’t racist, transphobic, against a religious group, or too heteronormative.

12. (political memoirs or comedic memoirs?) Idk man. But I hate politics in every way, shape, and form, so I’m gonna go with comedic memoirs.

13. (name a book with a really bad movie/tv adaptation) Um………. idk. I’m gonna go with Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire simply because of the fact that they cut so much out and, sorry not sorry, if the whole series was written by someone not transphobic, homophobic, and antisemitic it would be better. It’s great, but it could be so much better.

14. (name a book where the movie/tv adaptation was actually better than the original) Again idk. I’m gonna say The Princess Bride because that movie is so fucking good guys.

15. (what book changed your life?) I know it’s not technically a book book, but Unknown Colors by Gabriels_Wings on Wattpad. It got me into reading again and that’s only benefitted me so far (except for distracting me from homework, but who cares).

16. (if you could bring three books to a deserted island, which would they be and why?) Well, obviously, Simon vs the Homosapiens Agenda and Leah on the Offbeat (ok I’m gonna some up with abbreviations now, LotO for the latter and SvtHA for the former), and the last spot would be between The Song of Achilles and The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkein. Because they’re good books. And I’m gonna end up dying on said island and I need my gay fix with me.

17. (if you owned a bookshop what would you call it?) Oof, that’s hard. Probably….. Narnia. And it would be a very gay place with beanbags and a small coffee shop inside and it would be like this one place my mom went to all the time where you could buy a book and if you wanted to you could bring it back and they’d buy it back for slightly less than you bought it for. It was a great place. And my bookshop would be amazing.

18. (which character from a book is the most like you?) Toughie. I’m gonna go with… Blaise Zabini from Harry Potter or Abby Suso from SvtHA and LotO. Because Blaise is very gay and sassy (idk if he actually is in the books but hey, fanfiction) and Abby is a bi disaster and relatable af.

19. (which character from a book is the least like you?) Idk. Hannah Abbott? Because she’s a Hufflepuff? Idk man.

20. (best summer read?) LotO.

21. (best winter read?) Been a while since I actually remember reading a book in winter. I remember when I was in 5th grade I really loved reading Where The Mountain Meets The Moon by Grace Lin. That was good. But I think The Hobbit would be good too.

22. (pro or anti e-readers? why?) Pro, it makes reading at random places so much easier. Plus, I can then read gay fanfic at my christian grandparents’ houses.

23. (bookdepository or amazon?) I’ve never used Book Depository, but I looked it up (omg Kass you aren’t going to believe it, I googled something on my own!) and it seems smaller and cooler because it’s just books. So I’m gonna go with that one.

24. (do you prefer to buy books online or in a bookshop?) In a bookshop without a doubt, you can browse for hours. I love bookshops

25. (if you could be a character in a book for just one day, who would you be and why? bonus: any specific day in the story?) Simon Spier. From SvtHA. On the day of the carnival fair thing. Because zqawxsedcrfvtgbyhnujmikolplomiknujybhtvgrfcedxwszqa

26. (if you could be a character in a book for their entire life, who would you be and why?) Again Simon Spier. Because infdjfcdncewhfiubdkjcnsoawehfwedscnsaoufgrwiofbv cisahcsoainh

27. (if you could change one thing about mainstream literature, what would you change?) NO. MORE. DISCRIMINATION! And I swear to god people, quit idolizing authors who are racist or sexist or transphobic or homophobic or against certain religions or anything else because I swear they don’t deserve it! No more discrimination in the media guys.

28. (how many books have you read so far this year?) A lot. Idk the actual amount but a lot. Especially if we’re counting fanfic.

29. (how do you sort your shelves?) I don’t actually own enough books to sort lol. But I assume I would sort them alphabetically by author. And if I had a ton of books, I’d sort them further into genres.

30. (who’s your favorite author?) Becky Albertalli.

31. (who’s your favorite contemporary author?) Idk. I’m not that smart, I don’t put authors into genre categories.

32. (who’s your favorite fantasy author?) See above.

33. (who’s your favorite sci-fi author?) See above.

34. (list 5 otps) Oh god, here I go. Pansmione (Pansy Parkinson x Hermione Granger from Harry Potter), Wolfstar (Remus Lupin x Sirius Black from Harry Potter), Sabriel (Sam Winchester x Gabriel from Supernatural), Johnlock (John Watson x Sherlock from Sherlock), and Merthur (Merlin x Arthur Pendragon from Merlin).

35. (name a book you consider to be terribly underrated) What If It’s Us by Adam Silvera and Becky Albertalli.

36. (name a book you consider to be terribly overrated) Of Mice And Men by John Steinbeck.

37. (how many books are actually in your bookshelf/shelves right now?) 19, including a book I accidentally stole from my 7th grade LA teacher (sorry), and a college workbook I stole from my dad on lifesaving first aid for heart problems. + 1 movie (Love, Simon), 5 comic books, and an adult coloring book because why not. I also have 2 full boxes downstairs full of kids books (about half of which I've never read or have any interest in reading) from when I moved.

38. (what language do you most often read in?) English because I’m a dumb bitch and don’t know other languages well enough. I might be able to stumble through a kid’s book in French, and I could read a basic novel in Spanish.

39. (name one of your favorite childhood books) Goodnight Moon was one of my favorites. I also was obsessed with Where The Mountain Meets The Moon by Grace Lin, and when I was about 5 my mom would read The Hobbit to my brother and I when she got home from work if she was working a half day, or she wasn’t held up too late on a normal day. Ah, some actually decent childhood memories.

40. (name one of your favorite books from your teenage years) SvtHA.

41. (do you own a library card? How often do you use it?) Yeah, and decently often.

42. (which was the best book you had to read in school?) The Outsiders. In 7th grade.

43. (are you the kind of person who reads several books at once or the kind of person who can only read one book at a time?) Multiple at once. I kind of have to if I want to read for fun while I’m in school.

44. (do you like to listen to music when you read?) Honestly, my mind is like an iPod I can’t fully control, I was laying in my bed half asleep singing What I Got yesterday morning for no reason, so I don’t have a choice. There’s more of a choice if I’m listening to music, so yes.

45. (what is your favorite thing to eat when you read?) Nothing? I don’t really like to eat when I’m reading, unless I’m reading on my phone and then it doesn’t really matter. But when I'm reading I usually forget to eat.

46. (what is your favorite thing to drink when you read?) Tea. Without a doubt. If I’m not too lazy to make it, that is.

47. (what do you do to get out of a reading slump?) Well, I do one of two things. I either try to convince Kass (@eyeforaneye-toothforatooth) to write something for me, or I’ll write (because I know I have to read over it a bajillion times, and I write too much for anyone’s good)

48. (where is your favorite place to read?) In my mind palace. I have a little place in my mind palace that I go when I’m reading or writing, and it changes. Sometimes it’s in a cottage at night with the only light a fireplace that I’m sitting in front of, sometimes it’s leaned against a tree. Three of my favorites are leaning against a cherry blossom tree looking out at a river, on a beanbag in a cozy, quiet bookshop/library, and on a beach in Roatan, Honduras. Other than that, it’s curled up on my UFO couch in my front living room, in front of the gigantic window.

49. (when is your favorite time to read?) It actually depends on the season. In the summer, always because I don’t want to go outside because it’s too hot. In the winter it’s during the evening. Spring it’s early in the morning. Fall it’s around sunset.

50. (why do you love to read?) Because you’re taking yourself and delving into a different universe, where nothing you know exists and only what you’re reading does. It takes me away from the world and all of my struggles, and puts me somewhere where that doesn’t exist. It’s refreshing. I hate you too

[progeny-of-the-fury]

Killian Learns the Sword: Lesson Three

Log date:  9/28/18

OOC Note: The text in these logs are strictly for the reader’s enjoyment. Anyone using the knowledge displayed within this text without the participant’s knowledge risks the potential of blacklisting from future communication and roleplay. Please do not meta-game!

Tags: @truth-of-the-warden @vilette-laurent

Killian De'bayle steps into the yard with his cane in hand, his blunted sword secured to his belt. As per usual, he sets his cane aside, and removes his bag from where it sits slung over his shoulder, to rest both by the fountain. "Ser Vilette? Are you here?"

Vilette Laurent opened her eyes, before slowly pushing herself up. "I am."

Killian De'bayle: "Hello," Killian greets with a smile. "I--I don't know if you heard, but if you haven't, I should probably warn you...I didn't get to practice as much this time. I had to spend some time recovering from an injury."

Vilette Laurent: "That's fine. Where were you injured?"

Killian De'bayle: "Midsection." Killian lifts a hand as though to indicate the wound, just above his belly button and off to one side. "It's mostly healed now - I removed the stitches a few suns ago. But I was on bedrest and low activity for about a week...I think."

Vilette Laurent nods. "We'll be going at it a bit simpler today. I figured that you can't learn things in the usual order, so I had to shuffle your plan around." Vilette picks up her training swords, before stepping over to Killian, holding one out, pommel first for him. "Sword on your right."

Killian De'bayle lifts a hand to take the weapon. "Thanks. What order do you normally teach things?"

Vilette Laurent: "Now that you've learned to strike, I'd teach you some parries. But those are very reliant on sight, and I'd like to build up your other senses before we begin those."

Killian De'bayle: "Ahh...okay. I've been trying the exercises Master Veve has been trying to help me with, but...I'm really not very good at it."

Vilette Laurent nods. She steps back. "How much have you improved by? Can you sense someone striking at you?"

Killian De'bayle: "Mmh...I could, but if I was paying that much attention to it, I probably wouldn't actually be able to do anything. I already have to split my attention between too many things to try to split it more with that kind of focus..." Killian trails off for a moment. "I can sense where you are. Or Hestia. General positioning. But it's not anymore precise than just listening, or...maybe smelling would be a better comparison. I can sense things that are aetherially wrong with better precision, like voidsent. Those are easy for me to sense."

Vilette Laurent: "We'll build on that, then. But bit by bit. Get into stance, show me a long-point."

Killian De'bayle: "Ahh--alright." Taking his training weapon in both hands, Killian steps forward with his left foot to settle into long point. It's clear there's been some practice in the time since their last lesson, at least; he doesn't seem to struggle as much with fluidly entering into the guard with his knee pointed forward, shoulders low, and blade tip angled at head-height.

Vilette Laurent: "Good. You're entering advanced technique territory here, so if you don't understand anything, be patient, and ask for clarification. But this is what we'll be working on today, and for the next few lessons. Fencing from long-point. And some footwork."

Killian De'bayle: "Fencing and footwork. Okay."

Vilette Laurent assumes a similar stance, shoulders low but pulled back; back straight. She extended her point, letting her blade come into contact with Killian's. The steel hummed pleasantly for a brief moment. Every fight will involve the long-point. Do you remember me saying that?"

Killian De'bayle: "Yes. The nucleus of all fencing," Killian echoes.

Vilette Laurent: "Excellent. One of the most common scenarios you will face, is that you have struck for your opponent, and they have parried, or evaded. You will be in long-point. They may or may not be. That matters little for now, but the important thing to take note is that now, both your blades are in contact. They have -bound-. If they were sharp, the edges tend to bite into one another, locking them softly. But we won't get that sensation with these blunts. Anyway. The distance in which a bind occurs is a distance in which sight no longer matters. It is the distance where the Mind can no longer keep up with your senses. This distance is known as la Guerre; and everyone is blind within it."

Killian De'bayle: "Mmh..." Killian furrows his brows with some confusion.

Vilette Laurent: "You look confused?"

Killian De'bayle: "I do? Ahh...I guess...I don't understand what you mean. The mind not keeping up with the senses and...I didn't know that certain distances make people blind."

Vilette Laurent: "Sight requires people to see."

Killian De'bayle: "Er...right."

Vilette Laurent: "When people with sight try to see at this distance, they technically can, but everything will happen too fast for it to matter. In effect, what they see is irrelevant, and too late to be useful. Therefore, they must rely on other senses. They are blind."

Killian De'bayle: "Oh...that...makes more sense, I think. But you're not really blind. It just...doesn't matter that you can see?"

Vilette Laurent: "... Yes. So. Let's begin."

Killian De'bayle: "I never thought of sight being slow...how come--oh, okay."

Vilette Laurent: "Oh, no. Continue?"

Killian De'bayle: "Um, I just wondered...why the other senses are faster?"

Vilette Laurent: "Don't know. My master used to say that they were connected directly to our Hearts -- and, well. Our guts. Like how when we put our hand over a fire, without thinking, we pull it back."

Killian De'bayle: "Th-that's because it's hot."

Vilette Laurent: "But you don't think about it being hot. Thinking takes time. Feeling doesn't."

Killian De'bayle: "So...it's like...instinct? But...sight isn't instinctive? Doesn't--pretty much everyone rely on sight for everything?"

Vilette Laurent: "Sure. But it's still slow. You were born without sight, correct?"

Killian De'bayle: "Mmh," Killian affirms. "I've never been able to see."

Vilette Laurent: "Then you'll have to take my word for it. And others, as well. The further away you are, the greater advantage sight has. The closer, the less useful it is."

Killian De'bayle: "Um. I don't know how to...take a word."

Vilette Laurent paused for a moment, glancing to the side. "Uh. I meant- meant... Believe me. Trust me."

Killian De'bayle: "Oh...what does that have to do with taking words?"

Vilette Laurent: "... Good question. Just one of those sayings. Shall we begin?"

Killian De'bayle: "Oh. Okay, yes. I'm ready, I think. What should I be doing?"

Vilette Laurent: "Relax. Take a deep breath. Try to feel the blade like it's part of your arm. See if you can feel the weight of mine, resting on the weak of your blade."

Killian De'bayle: "Uhh...okay..." Killian tightens his grip on his hilt for a brief moment. It's obvious that Vilette has lost him on the "part of your arm" bit.

Vilette Laurent: "Loosen your grip. You won't be able to feel the vibrations if you tighten."

Killian De'bayle loosens his grip as instructed, smiling ruefully. "Sorry."

Vilette Laurent: "Good. Can you feel my blade?" Vilette just held her sword against Killian's.

Killian De'bayle: "Um..." Killian twitches his weapon a little with a soft scrape of the weapons against each other. "Yes."

Vilette Laurent: "Good. You have the right idea. Apply a bit of pressure."

Killian De'bayle: "To what?"

Vilette Laurent: "The more pressure from either party, the easier it is to feel. Your blade to mine, like this." Vilette angles her blade slightly to apply a bit of pressure to Killian's blade. Nothing impossible to fight against, but enough to know Vilette is still there.

Killian De'bayle pushes his blade against Vilette's more firmly - incidentally, at the same time as

Vilette does similarly. "Yes. I can feel it. Good. Now, the moment you no longer feel me in the bind, Or if you feel that I have left it, I want you to step in and thrust me to the face or neck. Can you do that?"

Killian De'bayle: "From...long point?"

Vilette Laurent: "Yes. Step in to do so, raise your shoulders, thrust up and forward."

Killian De'bayle: "But...it's not one of the thrusting guards."

Vilette Laurent: "Why is a thrusting guard a thrusting guard?"

Killian De'bayle: "Um...I...I don't know. The hilt is drawn back to the sides in the thrusting guards..."

Vilette Laurent: "Because it has its point forward, and therefore, allows you to thrust, no?"

Killian De'bayle: "Oh." Killian flushes red in the face. "I suppose...that's obvious."

Vilette Laurent: "... And the long-point also has its point forward, and allows you to thrust. The difference is the long-point is extended."

Killian De'bayle: "Right. Sorry..."

Vilette Laurent: "Here, you will not be able to put much power into it."

Killian De'bayle: "Extended...because my arms are already straight?"

Vilette Laurent: "Therefore, you will rely on your weight and speed-. Yes. But you still have room to extend more. If you lean in and turn your right hip towards the target."

Killian De'bayle: "I...think...I understand."

Vilette Laurent: "You ready, then?"

Killian De'bayle: "Yes."

Vilette Laurent nods. She then immediately raises her sword into a high sky guard, as if getting ready to cut down at Killian! The steel sings from the motion!

Once Killian detects his weapon's freedom, he tries a forward thrust as instructed, raising his shoulders and aiming somewhere around Vilette's head and neck - his aim is not very precise. He steps through with the motion, leaning in with the turn of his body to add momentum to the strike. "Hah!" he shouts.

The safety-point of the weapon finds purchase on something hard -- despite catching on her sternum. "Don't just stop there, when you thrust, really drive the point in. Shove me! With your point!"

Killian De'bayle: "But...won't I hurt you?"

Vilette Laurent: "I'm wearing armour."

Killian De'bayle: "Hmm...okay," Killian says, stepping back again and returning to long point. "So...I didn't thrust hard enough?"

Vilette Laurent: "No, no, put your point back where it was. I just want you to lean into it and push."

Killian De'bayle: "You want me to...put it back against your armor?"

Vilette Laurent: "Yes. And push. To get used to the feeling of it. When you land the thrust, you push yourself into it."

Killian De'bayle steps forward again, trying to re-find the position he was in when he finished his previous thrust. He meets with limited success. "H-here?"

Vilette Laurent reaches up to guide the point back to where it was. "There we go. Now," she braces herself. This always sucked. "Push."

Killian De'bayle grits his teeth and shoves forward as instructed, another shout accompanying the effort. He does not go easy - in fact, he probably overdoes it - apparently trusting Vilette's previous reassurances.

Vilette Laurent stumbles back, silent for a brief moment before shouting: "Good! Reset." She reaches out with her blade, ready to make contact with Killian's.

Killian De'bayle: "Reset," Killian echoes, stepping back into longpoint again. "Are you okay?"

Vilette Laurent: "... Absolutely. This time, I will be moving back and forth."

Killian De'bayle: "Back and forth?"

Vilette Laurent: "I will either move forward or backwards. You will need to feel it, and use all your senses to discern whether I have left the bind or am stepping away. And if you feel as if I am thrusting towards you, I would like you to push my sword away. And still, when you feel like you can, thrust. Understand?"

Killian De'bayle: "I'm not wearing armor," Killian says quickly. "Sh-should I go get mine?"

Vilette Laurent: "Not necessary. I will not really be thrusting. I will be stepping towards you."

Killian De'bayle: "Mmh...I'll try," Killian says uncertainly.

Vilette Laurent: "If I step back, you step forward after me." Vilette steps back, blades lightly scraping against one another from the motion.

Killian De'bayle frowns at the scrape of movement, then takes a hesitant step forward. There's no thrust to accompany it, or any other action - his focus is clearly torn, perhaps more so than one might expect, as he tries to pay attention both toward the feel of the scraping blades and the sound of Vilette's steps.

A good decision! Vilette's sword was still 'there'. But not for long. She raises it high to prepare for a cut!

Killian De'bayle || With no footsteps to listen for, it seems easier for Killian to detect just the movement of Vilette's blade, and he steps through with another thrust. His aim is a little higher this time - though whether by accident or intent is difficult to tell - and once again leans into the turn to extend his reach, trying to push hard against her as she instructed last time. "Hah!"

The point lands on Vilette's mask, glancing right! She lowers her sword to go and brace Killian from falling past her. "Good. Aim a little left, try to respond quicker to my release." She gently nudges him back.

Killian De'bayle: "I--I'll try." Killian sounds much less certain than he did a few moments ago. "It's hard to remember moving and listening and feeling and attacking all at once."

Vilette Laurent: "That's why we're practicing." Vilette steps back, making blade contact again. She then, after a brief moment, lowers her sword.

Killian De'bayle remains utterly still for a beat before his face turns red again. "I--I'm not sure what you're doing," he admits. "I'm not sure where your sword went."

Vilette Laurent: "... So... I'm open."

Killian De'bayle lowers his own sword to sweep it down in front of him, more akin to checking his space with his cane than wielding a blade. "I...I'm sorry," he says, flustered. "I got confused."

Vilette Laurent: "Back to long-point. When you feel that I'm open, thrust. If you take too long, your opening will be gone."

Killian De'bayle raises his weapon again back into long point. "But if I think that you're thrusting...try to knock your weapon aside? Is it...when you move forward?"

Vilette Laurent: "Yes." Vilette returned into contact -- and after a moment, did the same thing. She lowered her sword.

Killian De'bayle: "Okay. I...okay." Killian pauses when Vilette's blade contacts his, and then - when the contact fades - steps into another thrust He does apparently remember to aim a little left this time! But his distractions from his previous failure means his form is somewhat lacking in power.

Vilette Laurent stepped back from the thrust; the ridge of her helmet having directed the point into her neck. She rubbed at it slightly, before nodding. "Good. Again."

Killian De'bayle: "Mmh." Killian steps back once again and returns to long point!

Vilette Laurent steps back into distance, and establishes contact! She steps back once.

Killian De'bayle follows Vilette's retreat somewhat awkwardly, his expression grim with determination.

Vilette Laurent stepped back yet again!

Killian De'bayle tilts his head a little and continues to follow Vilette's next backstep.

Vilette Laurent raises her sword high.

Killian De'bayle thrusts forward and upward in response, pushing through with the strike! His aim could still use a bit of work, but at least he recognized the opening? "Hah!"

Vilette Laurent 's attack is successfully interrupted! She stumbles back, and lowers her sword. "Excellent! We'll stop here for today, and build more on this next week."

Killian De'bayle: "Ahh...okay. That's...that's good." Killian lowers his weapon and rubs his stomach. "Sorry I was--I don't feel like...I did as well. I'll practice harder this week."

Vilette Laurent: "It's fine. This specific part is… Hard to master quickly. We'll do some more next week, before we combine this with your cuts."

Killian De'bayle: "How should I practice now? I don't have anyone to practice with."

Vilette Laurent: "... I'll find you a practice partner for this. But it's not an easy thing to practice alone. And your cuts. And learn to step back and forth quickly."

Killian De'bayle: "Okay. I'll work on that."

Vilette Laurent: "Good."

Killian De'bayle: "Thank you for the lesson, Ser Vilette." Killian offers the training blade back.

Vilette Laurent takes it steps aside. "It's my pleasure, my lord." She then headed over to the door, passing by Hestia. She gives her a nod and a smile.

Hestia De'bayle offers the woman a nod of greeting in return before turning to Killian. “Do not feel discouraged, Killian. You were resting a great while, and we have had a preoccupied sennight."

Killian De'bayle: "It's hard to focus on a lot of things at once," Killian mumbles. "What if I can't learn it because it's too much?"

Hestia De'bayle: "Only you can allow that to be the case, Killian. I believe in. Nogelle does as well. It is not too much. You are a talented man."

Killian De'bayle: "Mmh..." Killian hums uncertainly. He reaches out to touch Hestia's face in a gesture of affection, nonetheless. "Ready to go home?"

Hestia De'bayle returns the gesture with a gentle smile. "Of course," she steps closer, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

[isaachood]

The six did not linger long amongst the ruins of Winterfell.

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Add CommentPromoted by Hostinger.inWhich are the best and cheapest hosting for WordPress with good resources in India?

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Footnotes

[1]

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[stephspencer10]

Post updated.View Post

In 2017, I bought and read Maud’s Story, a 2013 self-published/Vanity Press book written by my Aunt Charlotte LeBaron — my Mother’s brother Verlan LeBaron’s first wife. 

It’s a short book consisting mainly of letters supposedly written by Maud Lucinda McDonald LeBaron* — letters run-together in often hard-to-decipher paragraphs more akin to vignettes. 

It appears, at the time of this book’s writing, Aunt Charlotte still held fast to The Church of the First Born. This I assume because “Maud’s Story” contains a revised version/a rewrite of the history and teachings of the “Prophet Joel LeBaron” saga; wherein she turns the tale upside down and Joel into a martyred Prophet. By so doing, she shows, though not intentionally, how religious myths are made.

Maud Lucinda McDonald LeBaron is my maternal grandmother, of whom I’m “the spittin’ image” — I was always told while growing up. The above photo of her looks so much like me at that age, I look at it and think it is me. I can’t tell the difference!

When I saw, on Amazon.com, Aunt Charlotte had published my Grandma Maud LeBaron’s story, I spent $4.00  … and three hours reading it. Such was its brevity. That even includes the many times I had to re-read parts, attempting to understand what the heck had been said.

Suffice it to say, the book was no bargain! It left me wanting more. It’s supposed to be Grandmother LeBaron’s story; but missing in the biography are many tales Grandma used to tell about her life.

Nevertheless, nobody else has published anything much about Grandma Maud. So I’m glad Aunt Charlotte wrote as much as she did. “If you don’t like how the story was written, write it yourself,” they say.

Still, I resent that Aunt Charlotte used Grandmother Maud: She wrote a book “about” Grandma that was largely meant to draw in Grandma’s progeny, relatives and others; and convert them to her’s/Charlotte’s and Uncle Joel’s Church of the Firstborn doctrine — a la Charlotte LeBaron’s viewpoint, however — if they were not already members of Joel’s church. In that sense, Maud’s Story really should be “Charlotte’s Story.” 

I was disappointed “Maud’s Story” wasn’t imbued with more of Grandmother’s colorful history. And disgusted she borrowed heavily from The LeBaron Story — a book my mother Esther LeBaron Spencer largely wrote — without stating she was quoting from that book; let alone crediting my mother.

She includes in her booklet numerous “Quotes from Grandma’s Notes.” Doesn’t write much, otherwise, about Grandma. Perhaps, to get more of Grandma’s history, Charlotte expects us to read The LeBaron Story, a manuscript consisting mostly of my mom’s work that Aunt Charlotte helped her husband Verlan LeBaron compile, finish, and publish.

Both The LeBaron Story and Maud’s Story strike me as an apologist’s story written to preach the Church of the Firstborn/CotFotfot doctrine. 

In other words, Maud’s Story‘s general flavor is biased and provincial. It whitewashes and glorifies the Alma Dayer and Maud Lucinda McDonald LeBaron family, making them, the Mexico-LeBarons, look like a Godly family with a saintly mission.

I find this covert preaching of the CotFotfot dogma distasteful — especially the revising of its doctrine and history to make it more palatable than it was when my Uncles Ervil and Joel LeBaron first spawned this sect/cult in 1955—a take off from their older brothers Ross Wesley LeBaron Sr. and Ben LeBaron’s cults, as well as other Mormon fundamentalist cults.

 To summarize, Aunt Charlotte has white-washed history in The LeBaron Story and Maud’s Story so as to turn Uncle Joel into a Prophet, Saint, and Martyr. And his untimely murder into a Modern-Day Cain and Abel Story. But there’s a lot more to this dirty tale than meets the eye. So “Charlotte’s Story” is as much a myth in the making as it is a revisionist-history’s gold mine.

My final thoughts on Maud’s Story: Grandmother should have given a sermon or two in church if she was as erudite and well-versed in the cult’s dogma as she appears to be in Charlotte’s short biography where she uses Grandmother Maud to preach Joel’s dogma.

In truth, Grandmother was a musician and homemaker … no Scriptorian! She left the preaching and proselytizing up to leaders in the cult; preferred to be in the kitchen cooking and feeding people, when she wasn’t teaching piano lessons and taking care of kids and the homestead.

Perhaps Aunt Charlotte didn’t know it but William Preston Tucker (my now-deceased husband) and my Uncle Ervil LeBaron put their heads together to write those letters Charlotte says Grandma wrote to Spencer W. Kimball!

I was there at the time. I recall these two leaders of the LeBaron Church/cult talking about how they could use Grandma Maud as a ploy to get the President of the LDS church to read their [LeBaron cult] literature because she had grown up with Spencer W. Kimball.

They figured he would read a letter from Maud, his childhood friend, though not literature from her sons and their LeBaron cult. (So they were sneaking up on Pres. Kimball by way of Maud.)*

Suffice it to say, Aunt Charlotte wasn’t honest about the story of how my Uncle Joel became the self-proclaimed One Mighty and Strong. Therefore, I don’t trust much of what she relates in her book. I know for sure, for example, Grandmother Maud DID NOT write most of those letters Charlotte credits her with.

You only have to look at Grandma’s “Notes ‘n’ Quotes” Charlotte wrote “in Grandma’s own words” to get a good example of how Grandmother wrote. When you carefully compare “Grandma’s words” to those eruditely-written letters to Spencer W. Kimball, you can see they were NOT written by Grandma LeBaron.

A final word: Should anyone consider doing a reprint of Maud’s Story, please get a good Editor to go over it beforehand. Also, do not run Grandmother’s “Notes ‘n’ Quotes” together as if they were one organized piece. They’re not!

They are short vignettes, and should be separated as such; so the reader isn’t hoping to find the rest of the tale in the next paragraph, only to be left hanging by the tail — for a whole new tale takes up in the next paragraph!

*”Ghost writing“/deception was the name of the game when I was sequestered in the LeBaron cult in the 1960s. The sect’s two leading Scriptorians My Uncle Ervil LeBaron and my husband William Preston Tucker would write the exposé or such. Then publish it with whatever name or signature they thought would be most impressive and most likely to convert those receiving the literature.

(Comments transferred from Facebook”:)

Says Moira Blackmore:

I knew Maud, she went out of her busy days by visiting me all alone in Galeana with my 4 baby girls, and when their were shooting guns in my back neighborhood… thank you Steff … I love you, Maud, I love Charlotte as well, years later … 

  My response to Moira: I appreciate your feedback, Moira, and your attempts to always be positive and loving. That’s what makes the world go around. I’m so happy Grandma visited you and helped lift your spirits during a very bad time.

I remember her being concerned about your being over there alone; and her begging someone to take her over to visit you. I do not remember who she got to do the driving as she could not drive.

And now I’m getting off onto a bunny trail: I know she visited you out of care and concern for you and your situation. But she was also often there for visitors and people she was trying to help convert to the cult. Converts meant more people saved, more tithing money — and consecrations of all their wealth to the Bishop’s storehouse!

Such money was largely how Grandma and her sons managed to survive down in the Mexico-LeBaron colony. Especially was more money needed as each of her sons married more and more wives who bore more and more children. 

Given her help with the church’s conversion of new members, it seems aging Grandma Maud had no energy and time left over for her own hundreds of grand, great-grand, great-great, and great-great-great-grandchildren, and so on and on … not to mention her thousands of other relatives ad infinitum.

During the two years I lived at home, before I was married off at age 16, I recall only a few times after we moved to the LeBaron colony that she ever came by her daughter/my mother Esther LeBaron Spencer’s place to visit; even though we lived within walking distance of Grandmother Maud.

 Nor did my Grandmother Maud ever visit me, once I was married, even in my hours of need and desperation; although I lived within walking distance of her.

I may as well have not had a grandmother. But she did help Mother a lot after my father died. By then I was 18 and married — no longer living with my mom. 

When I was fourteen and we moved from the United States to where Grandmother Maud lived in Mexico, I had thought: Now I will finally have one of those grandmothers I have so often read about in children’s literature and so longed to have as I was growing up. 

But Grandmother Maud, though she had favored and spoiled my mama when she was raising her, was never emotionally there for me nor the rest of my mother’s thirteen other children, as far as I know. Not much, anyway.

For me, she never was a grandma that made cookies for her grandkids, let alone did she give us grandchildren any other gifts. Nor even hugs. She always had a big twinkling smile for me and her other grandchildren, though; whenever we saw her at church or elsewhere.

 Our Family was not a hugging-touching family. But pioneer-woman Grandmother was also simply overwhelmed and overworked, given her primitive lifestyle and her monumental duties; including being the church pianist and the colony’s piano teacher.

To put it succinctly, there was simply no way my ever-aging grandmother could muster all the time and energy needed to keep up with her exponentially growing progeny. She was already 68 years old when my family moved to the LeBaron colony; I was 14 years old then.

I had always lived within walking distance of her, while in the LeBaron colony; so she did come by three or four times, after I was married, to give me some piano lessons. She was around seventy-three years old then! Thanks, Grandma! 

But, other than that, in the four years I lived near her, and on my own, after I was married at sixteen, Grandmother dropped by one other time — though not to see her new grandchild, my first child, that I had almost died giving birth to, at age seventeen. My baby and I were simply taken for granted, as was generally the custom there!

 The reason she came by that one other time was to take back a piece of piano sheet music she had given me that she now wanted to turn around and take away from me to give to an investigator of our cult who was a pianist! I told Grandma, “No! You gave the music to me!! It’s mine now! I want it. You can’t take it back to give to somebody else!”

Grandmom was furious with me for not giving it back to her so she could gift it to the investigator of our “Church”! Getting converts — new people into God’s work — was part of her and her sons’ bread and butter. So that investigator was more important than I, her granddaughter. On top of that, she treated me as if the music still belonged to her, though she had given it to me the year before. Such “Indian trading”! 

Now I know where Mother learned this taking-back what she had given me, as if she still had tabs on it; so could turn around, whenever she wanted to, and give it to somebody else — even though I still very much wanted it and it belonged to me!

I never knew what to depend on. Then you wonder what causes schizophrenic kids? I’m at least sure this behavior did not help any. 

Bottom line: When there are lots of kids and relatives, they are not highly valued. They get taken for granted. They are pawns in the hands of the powers that be and regularly sacrificed for “the cause”!

     Rachel LeBaron Anderson:

 The BIG question: “Will what you are going to say improve the world by being said?”

    Steph Spencer Good question, Rachel! I ask myself that important question all the time as I write my Memoirs!

  Rachel LeBaron Anderson You are bringing healing to the younger generations trying to make sense of everything, building strong roots, many generations will be glad someone wrote things down.

  Steph Spencer Thanks so much for this insightful response and feedback! As always, Rachel, you show wisdom and intellect. Your remarks are much appreciated and will help me as I take time to make sense of everything on my end. That is certainly one of my goals!

    Dena McLean I enjoyed reading this book, not only to learn about family but specifically learn more about my Great Grandmother Maud. I know the story is all in perspective but I like to hear all perspectives.

Even if I don’t agree with the religious views, I find it fascinating how they chose Joel LeBaron, Alma’s priesthood keys and all the people connected to each story and then trying to find them in genealogy. Right now, I’m trying to discover if the man who baptized Maud was John Smith, as in Joseph Smith’s brother’s son or another John Smith. I hope to find some truth.

Steph Spencer Thank you for this valuable feedback. As always, I’m impressed with your scholarliness. To be sure, Charlotte’s Maud’s Story is skewed: It attempts to convert people to the belief that Joel was a true Prophet, etc.

Aunt Charlotte Kunz LeBaron was there pretty much from the beginning of Joel and Ervil’s “Church,” but chose to change how Joel got the “priesthood keys,” et cetera. Newcomers to the story believe her fabrications. That’s how myths are built.

Review of Charlotte LeBaron’s “Maud’s Story” Post updated.View Post In 2017, I bought and read Maud's Story, a 2013 self-published/Vanity Press…

[thrashermaxey]

Ramblings: Pacioretty, Okposo, Gallagher, Kreider, and Position Scarcity – September 7

  It’s the final weekend before training camp which means fantasy drafts are right around the corner for most. Time is running out to get all the knowledge you need to dominate your fantasy league this year so head to the Dobber Shop to get your copy of the 2018-19 Dobber Hockey fantasy guide! Projections, tips, line combinations, articles, and more to get you set for the upcoming campaign.

*

More on the Max Pacioretty saga.

The Canadiens captain is apparently not willing to negotiate a new contract with the Habs once the season begins. That means they either extend him now, trade him now, trade him in season, or let him walk. Let’s assume Bergevin is smart enough not to let him walk for nothing, and there is enough bad blood that he won’t be extended in the next four weeks, it’s a matter of when, not if, he will be traded. That throws his potential fantasy value in disarray. If he’s traded to Colorado to play with Nathan MacKinnon, great! If he’s traded to Anaheim to play with Adam Henrique, well…?

*

The refinement of my projections for 2018-19 continues. I’m still on track to have everything ready for Tuesday, which is about two weeks later than I wanted but c’est la vie.

Yesterday’s Ramblings discussed arbitrage opportunities. Today we’ll discuss positional scarcity and how that can affect rankings.

Anyone who’s played fantasy hockey long enough knows that in leagues where forwards are split between the three forward positions, elite wingers generally carry more value than elite centres. The reason for this is that someone like Mikael Granlund could be a 70-point centre this year and be the 20th-ranked centre. If you looked for the 20th-ranked left winger, you could be looking at someone like Ondrej Palat and his 50-ish points. Peripheral stats will make a difference, but the point remains the same: the floor for relevant centres in a fantasy league is higher than the floor for wingers. So, if all is equal, elite wingers have more value over replacement fantasy options than elite centres.

The categories also matter. In my latest iteration of projections, I have Connor McDavid at 28.2 hits and Blake Wheeler at 94.8. While I don’t have enough leagues to create a meaningful sample, in one of my keeper leagues, every 107.8 hits above the lowest-ranked team in hits (1185) gains one point in roto standings. In that league, though, fantasy-relevant right wingers rack up fewer hits than fantasy-relevant centres, meaning hits from right wingers are more valuable than hits from centres. Even though Wheeler is only projected for roughly 2.4 times more hits than McDavid, because of the added value to hits due to their scarcity right wing relative to centres, the value Wheeler’s hits bring to the roster are significantly more valuable than just a factor of 2.4.

Of course, that only applies if you draft Wheeler as a winger and dress him as a winger. On Yahoo!, he has multi-position eligibility. If you dress him as a centre, you’d have to compare apples to apples, and Wheeler’s hits become less valuable.

With that in mind, these are my latest top-20 skater projections for standard 12-team Yahoo! leagues, without plus/minus included. That means goals, assists, shots, power play points, and hits. They are based on everyone playing 82 games, are not age adjusted, and try to account for position (and category) scarcity.

    The first thing that will jump out at people is that Connor McDavid is not first overall. In fact, he’s not even in the top-5. A few words about that.

As I mentioned, this isn’t age adjusted. If we assume McDavid keeps improving, he very easily could be at the top of the list.

Two things about McDavid’s rankings: his hit totals are so low relative to centres that his 28 projected hits are actually a net negative in reference to points gained in roto standings. If we were to exclude hits as a category for all skaters, McDavid moves from sixth to third and Alex Ovechkin moves from fifth to eighth. There isn’t a huge spread at the top; the point distance between first and fifth is smaller than the distance between fifth and seventh. Moving even just a few spots at the top is significant. But it should show how important it is to not be a relative zero in a category. The difference in projected hits (relative to their position) between Patric Hornqvist and Auston Matthews amounts to about one-quarter of the total value that Nikolaj Ehlers projects to have this year. Just think about this statement:

  The difference in hits between Patric Hornqvist and Auston Matthews is so large that it’s equal to about five goals, nine assists, 53 shots, and 2 PPPs.

  When put into that context, it shouldn’t be such a big surprise McDavid isn’t ranked as a top-5 skater (subject to change). Despite how far ahead he is in aggregate in point production and (to a degree) shot totals, the replaceability at his position and his complete drag on hit totals are enough to knock him down a few pegs from the top slot.

Just as an aside for added context on how much individual league settings matter: I ran my current projections through the DraftKings scoring system (3 points for a goal, 2 for an assist, 0.5 for either a SOG or a blocked shot, 1 point for a short-handed point) and Matthews comes in as the #9 skater, between Malkin and Seguin. In Yahoo! standard setups, he’s just inside the top-25.

Now, McDavid still a top-10 pick as it is and I’m sure once I adjuste for age he’ll be a top-3 pick. But this is an exercise to show just how much it can hurt when a player is a complete nothing in an entire roto category.

  On Tuesday, I showed part of my points-only projections and raved about Johnny Gaudreau. Then I ran his projections for standard roto leagues and he was *checks notes* rated ahead of several players being drafted ahead of him. A few of those names: Brad Marchand, Patrik Laine, Nathan MacKinnon, John Tavares, Tyler Seguin, Auston Matthews, and Claude Giroux, just to start.

*Note: we’re using the expected goals model from Corsica for part of the projections and they don’t like Laine at all. If he pops 40 goals again, he moves into the top-15 skaters.

The lack of hits will keep Gaudreau from being an elite fantasy option unless he gets to the 100-point mark, but that is reflected in his ranking drop from points-only leagues to roto leagues.

These projections love Gaudreau and have him fourth in the league in assists this year. Having such a leg up at a wing position in assists is a big reason he’s ranked where he is.

Right now, his Yahoo! ADP is early in the third round. That seems about perfect for those targeting him; it’s probably drafting him at where he should finish in a good year and there is loads of upside beyond that.

  Blake Wheeler tops the list and that is on the heels of a season most heavily weighted in this projection where he amassed 91 points, 94 hits, and over 40 PPPs. His Yahoo! ranking is 18th, his ADP is 20th, and NHL.com has him at 14. In all likelihood, he’ll be a second-round pick in 12-team leagues this year.

It seems most people are expecting a regression from Wheeler this year and that is totally reasonable. He had a career year last year and is heading into his age-32 season. Here’s the thing about that: in 2016-17, when he had nearly half (21) the PPPs that he had in 2017-18 (40), he was still the 12th-ranked skater. Now, scoring is up league-wide so dropping to 70 points in 2018-19 wouldn’t be like having 70 points in 2016-17, but it gives us an idea that even with regression built in, he does enough elsewhere (at a wing position) that he can still be incredibly valuable.

When drafting skaters in the second round, you want to get a player who won’t hurt you and has the upside to be among the elite fantasy options. As long as Wheeler doesn’t fall off a cliff, and there’s no reason to think he will just yet, he checks both those boxes.

  Anyone that follows me knows it’s no secret I think John Tavares will be over-drafted this year and this is another point on this side of the ledger. Before assuming I have any ‘bias’ or I’m a ‘hater’ these are projections based on historical performance. These aren’t made by hand. I let Excel do the work.

People have to realize that last year, Tavares had one winger score 40 goals, another winger have a 50-assist season, a rookie who put up the first 80-point season in a decade as the fourth forward on his power play unit, and Tavares didn’t even manage a career-high in points. Factor in greatly reduced PP minutes moving from a heavily-used top unit in Brooklyn to a split PPTOI setup in Toronto, and how much can we expect from him? Even repeating last year will be a good 2018-19.

  Quite honestly, if you want to attack wingers and defencemen early, you can probably wait and grab Ryan Getzlaf in the fifth round as your top centre. If he can stay healthy – remember that he only missed a month and a half because of a puck to the face, it’s not like he’s an injury-prone player – he could be a point-per-game centre with stout hit totals in the fifth round.

  People may be looking for Brad Marchand. This is the problem with Marchand: he’s great at racking penalty minutes, not so much in the hits department. Yahoo! switching from PIMs to hits hurts his value a lot. Marchand has 88 hits over the last two seasons, spanning 148 games; Wheeler had 94 hits last year alone. If Yahoo! had kept PIMs instead of hits as the standard, Marchand probably ranks somewhere around Malkin, Stamkos, and Kessel. Instead, his value takes a big hit.

  Readers may be asking where all the defencemen are, with just Burns ranking in the top-20. Well, there are four defencemen ranked between 22nd and 28th: Victor Hedman, Dustin Byfuglien, Erik Karlsson, and John Carlson, in that order.

As mentioned earlier, this doesn’t include plus/minus. Considering the quality of the Sens this year, Karlsson could very well get buried by plus/minus. I said it in a prior Ramblings: he’s a guy you trade for in January rather than draft in September.

  You’ll never believe this, but people are undervaluing Brendan Gallagher again. To be honest, the same could be said for Chris Kreider. Here’s their company in my current projections among wingers:

    Remember that we’re using an expected goals model which favours net-front players. Gallagher is projected for more goals than Kreider and Kreider more than someone like Sebastian Aho. All the same, Gallagher was a top-75 player last year and that was accomplished skating with Tomas Plekanec and carrying a minus-13. If he’s on the top line and finally start playing 17-18 minutes a night? He can be a top-100 player again. He’s going much later than that in drafts.

Both Kreider and Gallagher have plus/minus concerns because of their respective teams which obviously factors into their rankings and ADP elsewhere. They also are backed by two of the top performing goalies of the last decade. Not a bad gamble.

  One last guy I want to talk about: Kyle Okposo. He’s ranked outside the top-200 by Yahoo!, is not being drafted as a top-36 RW by ADP, and is just inside NHL.com’s top-250. By my projections, in a full 82-game season, I have him as the 21st right winger.

Okposo is a guy who can put up nearly a hit per game, has the ability to land 200 shots in a full year, and is likely locked on Buffalo’s top PP unit. In 12-team leagues, his cost is virtually nothing. He’s a player I want as a bench option who can finish much higher than that (two years ago, in just 65 games played, he finished just outside the top-150 players in this format).

  That’s all for today. I’ll have a lot more on Tuesday when all my work should be finished.

from All About Sports https://dobberhockey.com/hockey-rambling/ramblings-pacioretty-okposo-gallagher-kreider-and-position-scarcity-september-7/

[bracketvoodoo]

One Shining Model?

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Ford Higgins

After the first weekend of Madness, there’s no need to remind our readers that game projections are notoriously difficult - just ask the Cavaliers, Musketeers, Bearcats, or Tar Heels what they think of the latest power rankings. The unpredictability is one of the reasons why we love the tournament, but it presents a conundrum when we sit down to fill out our brackets. For our readers who rely on public statistical systems (including ours) for bracket assistance, I wanted to dive deeper into how to evaluate projections, and how to avoid pitfalls hidden in the data.

Methodology

I judged the accuracy of different projection systems by analyzing projected game outcomes, incorporating home court advantages when possible, and comparing those projections against actual game results. The dataset includes most Division 1 regular season and conference tournament games from the 2017-18 season. Because of data issues with the underlying data source, a small percentage of games are discarded.

I evaluated three different systems:

Ken Pomeroy

Sonny Moore

Jeff Sagarin

I also included a home court advantage factor. Moore and Sagarin provide specific home-court advantages that can be applied across all games, which assumes every team has an identical home court advantage. KenPom, on the other hand, applies team-specific home court advantages in his own predictions and I simply used the average of the advantages in place of the individual values to make predictions with his system. I also assumed home court advantage applied to the listed home team in neutral site games.

System Accuracy In Conf Out of Conf Home Away Games Home Court Pomeroy 73.50% 70.40% 78.40% 78.20% 62.80% 5286 3.12 Moore 72.40% 69.50% 76.90% 76.40% 62.00% 5315 4.00 Sagarin 73.70% 70.90% 78.30% 76.90% 65.30% 5283 3.17

I hypothesized that all three projection systems would begin the season with limited accuracy, with each system becoming more accurate over the course of the season (as more information about each team became available). Surprisingly, this proved false, each system enjoyed an early season peak, declined until final exams and the holiday season, after which performance leveled off or improved slightly until conference play started. Some of the early-season projection accuracy can be attributed to the non-competitiveness of “buy games”, with high major teams padding their win total against low major teams in need of money (including 2018 tourney darling, Texas Southern). I was also surprised to see projection accuracy continue to decline throughout the conference season, especially during February, when teams are usually facing opponents for a second time in a season. In the end, all three systems ended the season around 73% accuracy.

Next, I sliced the projections into common splits and analyzed how each system performed for these subsets:

In-conference versus out-of-conference and games

Picking home team winners versus picking away teams

In general, we would expect the accuracies for these splits to be randomly distributed around the overall average of ~73%. However, since we know that most out-of-conference games are played during the first half of the season, I expected the in/out conference splits to follow the overall time series patterns discussed above - and that’s exactly what I saw. Since I expected richness of head-to-head matchup history, to improve projection accuracy, I was especially surprised by these results.

Looking at home/away splits provided us with the most surprisingly results of all. Our #1 ranked system, Jeff Sagarin, was over 10% more accurate when picking home teams to win, versus picking away teams to win. This pattern not only holds up for the other projection systems, but is even more pronounced for Moore (76.40% vs 62.00%, -13%) and KenPom (78.20% vs 62.80%, -16%). Seeing all three systems share the same bias toward over-picking away teams suggests it may be time to revisit how home court advantage is factored into these models.

Note: Since KenPom generates team-specific home court factors, it is likely possible that incorporating those values would slightly improve the home/away splits.

The Sweet Sixteen

Kansas State vs Kentucky - South Region (Atlanta)

(5) Kentucky (9) Kansas St. KenPom 20.44 15.36 KenPom OOC 79.10% 83.50% Moore 82.35 78.43 Moore OOC 76.30% 81.30% Sagarin 88.21 84.31 Sagarin OOC 77.80% 82.30% BracketVoodoo 43.16 38.62 Vegas Spread -5.5 Vegas ML -255 +215

All three systems have Kentucky as a four or five point favorite, though the Atlanta location could make it a semi-home game for the Wildcats in blue. Interestingly, all three systems excel at correctly predicting outcomes for Big 12 out of conference games while having the lowest accuracy of any power conference with games involving an SEC team playing out of conference.

Loyola-Chicago vs Nevada - South Region (Atlanta)

(11) Loyola (IL) (7) Nevada KenPom 15.26 18.13 OOC 73% 77.20% Moore 74.98 78.4 OOC 75.40% 77.00% Sagarin 81.01 84.37 OOC 73.90% 80.20% BracketVoodoo 36.63 40.01 Vegas Spread -1.5 Vegas ML 105 -125 OOC Games 115 101 OOC Games 190 139

This game projects as a close game, with each system pegging the difference in teams to be about three points. It is also the only game where neither team comes from a power conference, which could be influencing why the systems rate them closely. The relative lack of accuracy for both teams’ conferences in non-conference games suggests that the models might be less trustworthy in this matchup than others.

Florida State vs Gonzaga - West Region (Los Angeles)

(9) Florida St. (4) Gonzaga KenPom 16.21 24.35 OOC 82.00% 78.70% Moore 81.14 81.92 OOC 77.20% 76.20% Sagarin 85.45 89.67 OOC 80.20% 77.00% BracketVoodoo 40.92 44.55 Vegas Spread -5.5 Vegas ML 210 -250 OOC Games 206 122

This game features the most variety among the systems - KenPom and Sagarin have Gonzaga as varying degrees of favorites, whereas Moore has the game as basically a coin flip. But Moore has also had the least success with both conferences, so I would shade towards the other systems. On top of that, the LA crowd could also be slightly in the Bulldogs’ favor as a West Coast team.

Texas A&M vs Michigan - West Region (Los Angeles)

(7) Texas A&M (3) Michigan KenPom 16.91 23.41 OOC 85.30% 79.10% Moore 79.95 82.74 OOC 82.70% 76.30% Sagarin 85.43 89.01 OOC 83.80% 77.80% BracketVoodoo 42.22 44.41 Vegas Spread -2.5 Vegas ML 130 -150 OOC Games 185 190

Michigan is favored by all three systems, with KenPom favoring the Wolverines the most. The Big 10 enjoys the second most accurate out of conference predictions across the systems whereas the SEC has the least accurate, providing an interesting contrast in conference features. However, KenPom has the largest split between the two teams and performs the best for both conferences, increasing my confidence in his prediction of Michigan.

Villanova vs West Virginia - East Region (Boston)

(1) Villanova (5) West Virginia KenPom 31.7 22.29 OOC 86.60% 83.50% Moore 88.62 83.63 OOC 86.40% 81.30% Sagarin 94.79 90.2 OOC 85.90% 82.30% BracketVoodoo 51.07 45.71 Vegas Spread -5.5 Vegas ML -230 195 OOC Games 134 139

Villanova, the top remaining seed by both the committee and all three systems, is a five point favorite according to Moore and Sagarin. KenPom has the difference between the two teams as nearly double that at about nine and a half points. The crowd in Boston will likely be pro-Nova, which would further boost their chances. Furthermore, all three models do their best work with Big East out of conference games, making Villanova even more favored by them.

Texas Tech vs Purdue - East Region (Boston)

(3) Texas Tech (2) Purdue KenPom 21.99 26.99 OOC 83.50% 85.30% Moore 82.83 88.1 OOC 81.30% 82.70% Sagarin 88.45 92.35 OOC 82.30% 83.80% BracketVoodoo 44.02 47.76 Vegas Spread -1.5 Vegas ML 105 -125 OOC Games 129 185

Despite this being a 2/3 matchup in the East region, every system has Purdue as about a five point favorite over Texas Tech. However, the systems are likely unaware of Isaac Haas’ absence for Purdue due to a fractured elbow, which should help Texas Tech close the gap.

Kansas v Clemson - Midwest Region (Omaha)

(1) Kansas (5) Clemson KenPom 23.43 20.25 OOC 83.50% 82.00% Moore 85.6 80.84 OOC 81.30% 77.20% Sagarin 91.72 85.97 OOC 82.30% 80.20% BracketVoodoo 45.98 42.81 Vegas Spread -4.5 Vegas ML -210 180 OOC Games 139 206

This matchup between 1 seed Kansas and 5 seed Clemson is the closest any game comes to a true home/away situation in the Sweet 16, and could make us feel even more confident in the consensus pick of Kansas. KenPom rates the teams as closer than either Moore or Sagarin, which is a departure from some of our other matchups where KenPom had the largest differential.

Duke v Syracuse - Midwest Region (Omaha)

(2) Duke (11) Syracuse KenPom 28.95 14.04 OOC 71.10% 71.10% Moore 88.5 79.06 OOC 72.40% 72.40% Sagarin 93.64 83.15 OOC 73.80% 73.80% BracketVoodoo 50.11 39.02 Vegas Spread -11.5 Vegas ML 575 -795 OOC Games 149 149

Note: Since these are both ACC teams, for this game we looked at each system’s accuracy for ACC conference games (IC)

Our final game holds the distinction of being the only game between two conference opponents for this round. The two ACC foes only met once during the season, however, so we don’t have much history to go on. Duke was able to get past Syracuse by a score of 60-44 at Cameron Indoor, though Syracuse has succeeded thus far in the tournament by holding teams to 60 points or less. It will be interesting to see if the Orange’s magic continues or if it will end in a double digit victory like the systems are predicting, despite the drop in confidence for in conference predictions by the models.

Final Four

The biggest wild card region remains the South, based upon the lower accuracies for the remaining teams’ out of conference games by the three models. Villanova is heavily favored by KenPom to come out of the East, but Moore and Sagarin think a potential matchup between the Wildcats and Boilermakers of Purdue is more of a toss-up. The West regional has similar matchups statistically, but two less predictable conferences involved with the SEC and WCC, making it tough to predict. In the Midwest, Duke is a clear favorite over Syracuse, but the Orange’s 2-3 zone could be a confounding variable the models struggle to incorporate into their ratings and the in conference factor adds more uncertainty to the matchup of Hall of Fame coaches. If the higher seeds in both matchups advance, each system would favor Duke over one seed Kansas, though any home court advantage for the Jayhawks turns it into a toss-up.

Which Projections Are Best?

The answer, it turns out, is that the “best” projection varies from game-to-game. That’s not entirely unexpected, but now we have a toolkit for understanding how we can take advantage of those variations and pick the best brackets.

No matter how good the projections are, we still never would have picked UMBC to beat Virginia by 20 - and that’s why we play the games.

[gerardbookseller]

Handbook for Mortals Reviewed(Contains Spoilers)

                                                                                                                                With all the controversy surrounding how this unknown debut author Lani Sarem got on the number #1 spot on the New York Times Bestseller List by manipulating, buying, and unethically skewing the rankings for her book Handbook for Mortals (a book that no one has heard of or even seen), I thought I would try to be objective and read what the hoopla was about by actually downloading a copy of it online. Let's put it this way. I spend $10 on this piece of shit and I want my money back. Is it as bad as they say? Let's just say that it makes Fifty Shades of Grey look like a Pulitzer. Yes, it's that bad!

                                                                                                                                 Let's begin with Miss Sarem's background. She is a former manager from the band Blues Traveler and was fired for committing tons of fraudulent scheming to promote the group. She is also the cousin of former NSYNC member JC Chasez and who has D-List to Z-List celebrity connections to help get this self-published piece of garbage out there. Unlike plenty of books who have been traditionally published and marketed legitimately, this wonderful, trite YA (if you can call it that) was created by a pop culture site known as GeekNation, a company that now has branched out into the book publishing world. From the questionable stolen cover art which is from a copyrighted art piece to the elements of the plot being lifted...er borrowed...um inspired from various works, it is sad to think that Miss Sarem can't rely on her own merit as a writer and has to rely to cheap tactics to putting out her book.

                                                                                                                                However, to understand the ridiculous of her work, we should examine the author and her work. The best way to describe Handbook for Mortals is to think of the 90's campy movie Showgirls mix with a bit of Kami Garcia's Beautiful Creatures. Imagine Nomi Malone (named Zade here) running away from her poor southern background in Tennessee to Las Vegas to be a magician's assistant. Instead of former Saved by Bell actress Elizabeth Berkley screeching that she is not a stripper but a dancer, picture 18 year old Zade squealing how she is not magic groupie extra but a "magician's assistant" and she is expressing herself with jazz hands and spirit fingers.

                                                                                                                                 One thing you should notice is that this is marketed as a YA and we know Miss Sarem did do her research because your typical teen/young adult novel consists of characters who are between the ages of 14 to 18 years of age with the potential for teen romance with male characters who are close enough in age. Never mind the fact that this is marketed as a young adult novel and the protagonist is an adult and getting involve with would-be love interests in their early 20s and above. But again, this YA and apparently fits the parameters of a teen relationship despite the looming threat of a statutory rape charge. Apparently, this all takes a backseat because Miss Sarem assumes her young readers are naive enough to think that her protagonist Zade is very relatable as she describes herself as, "average-looking" but "hot-girl skinny" with "long legs...toned" and an "hourglass figure". Yes, Zade is very relatable to the audience. The character then proceeds to discuss her poor southern upbringing but suddenly name drops the designers she wearing from her skinny jeans, Lucky shirt, and Dakine duffel bag that she is sporting. Yes, the lead character is very relatable according to the author. *Groan* Well, Zade finally gets to Vegas and after impressing her boss and headlining magician, who happens to be a cross between David Copperfield, David Blaine, and Chris Angel with her illusions, she instantly is promoted to a bigger part of his act. Eventually, Zade gets a few candidates for her love interest until her fickle heart finally settles on one and we discover through a series of badly written, ungrammatical and erroneous typos that truly is magical and that the headlining magician is....

                                                                                                                                                   SPOILER ALERT!!!! DON'T READ FURTHER!!!!

.......................

                                                                                                                                Is really her biological father who is mortal while she is a magick user of some kind that is never truly explained because there are tons of gaps in the story including a useless magic battle scene that makes no sense and did very little with filling in the plot. Plus, if you want answers to Zade's background, you won't get any since all you know she is descended from gypsies and she can do magic. That's it! Don't you feel gypped?

                                                                                             In addition, Sarem's writing can be so incoherent that her confusing use of metaphors and symbolisms get lost in her style. She repeats herself constantly and her sentence structure and phrasing is very awkward. Furthermore, there is no excuse for the typos especially when she is kissing her father's "check". Do you mean a check where you're writing for payment? A check that shows a symbol that it has been addressed? Or simply "checking" someone's work? Of course, we know she meant "cheek" but obviously this error shows lazy writing on her part and a lack of editing. Sad. Sad. Sad. Yes, Handbook for Mortals is the most pretentious, arrogant, ill-conceived YA title out there and rightfully deserves the shredding and hatred for it. Lani Sarem really should quit writing and go into another profession where her shady skill set can better be applied. An attorney perhaps? Adding further insult into her delusion, she adds a 2018 sequel for this book even though this title just started to get noticed by everyone. Jumping the gun, much?

Sorry, this is a completely novelty. I say avoid this trash and read something much better. This is not worth anyone's time which can be best described as a "12 year old writing fanfiction."